Funniest Military Fails...

Поделиться
HTML-код
  • Опубликовано: 14 май 2024
  • Check out ALL my content below!
    linktr.ee/Nikkoortizzz

Комментарии • 353

  • @phantom_beast09
    @phantom_beast09 Месяц назад +259

    “She knows how to serve dinner” that one got me 🤣😂🤣😂🤣

    • @LBdreamin
      @LBdreamin Месяц назад +9

      Betty Crocker gonna like dem cakes

    • @alwayzchillin0714
      @alwayzchillin0714 Месяц назад +4

      Like GYAAAT!😳👋

    • @kyleayer5805
      @kyleayer5805 Месяц назад

      Cum to find this and what do you know… top comment 🎉

    • @jpotato8918
      @jpotato8918 Месяц назад +3

      Great men think alike !🍻

    • @JBCPuppydaddy
      @JBCPuppydaddy Месяц назад +2

      Hell yeah man

  • @kingrad4493
    @kingrad4493 Месяц назад +153

    "oh its a kissing party" got me dead 🤣🤣

  • @GavinEstes16
    @GavinEstes16 Месяц назад +154

    0:36 Marines when they aren’t supervised lmao

  • @JangersTheDog
    @JangersTheDog Месяц назад +60

    "You don't miss it until it's over" That fucking hits hard.

    • @Dh-hg5ym
      @Dh-hg5ym Месяц назад

      How i felt bout droppin outta hs

    • @aar5225
      @aar5225 Месяц назад +1

      @@Dh-hg5ymnot too late to sign another 4 years contract ;)

    • @Tommy_TheG96
      @Tommy_TheG96 18 дней назад +1

      Couldn’t have said it better , got out two months ago and it’s not the same

  • @kitkatdisney4025
    @kitkatdisney4025 Месяц назад +47

    Marty Robbins goes hard AF ❤

  • @Sunbro_Joe
    @Sunbro_Joe Месяц назад +23

    "Ma'am, i'm gonna look after your son" fuckin killed me lmao 6:35

  • @user-kp8kf4rm2j
    @user-kp8kf4rm2j Месяц назад +30

    Your honesty is refreshing,and funny

  • @BenedictMeatball
    @BenedictMeatball Месяц назад +69

    Old friend from highschool: “Hey man, how you been?”
    Me: *Pauses trying not to say gay* “Gay!”

  • @trith72
    @trith72 Месяц назад +15

    Nikko looking at that foot like "Yeah i did this before"....

  • @NevikAdnarim
    @NevikAdnarim Месяц назад +10

    I got out in 2016 and I still have to watch my humor around EVERYONE!

  • @anothernewaccount1657
    @anothernewaccount1657 Месяц назад +51

    "We have to do vehicle inspections once a month." - LMAO not in the Air Force you don't!!! HA HA HA HA HA HAAAAAH!!!!
    Me: driving a Volkswagen Golf at 230km (around 150 mph) on the Autobahn as an A1C that was bought on the lemon lot and never inspected.

    • @SpeedyJoe.
      @SpeedyJoe. Месяц назад

      ❤❤

    • @Gam3ZILLA
      @Gam3ZILLA Месяц назад +1

      not in Army aviation either, had one in three years

    • @dougcurb6645
      @dougcurb6645 Месяц назад

      Not in the Navy either

    • @saplingthrasher23
      @saplingthrasher23 18 дней назад

      We got inspected to get the military sticker for our windshield but that was it when I was at Ft. Bragg 88-92.

  • @AflacMan13
    @AflacMan13 Месяц назад +3

    "Ever used a dead enemy's esophagus as a refueling nozzle for your Jerry Can's? It's the same shape and everything."

  • @Poisedanubis85
    @Poisedanubis85 23 дня назад +1

    BIG LOVE FROM THE UK NIKKO OUR COUNTRY NEEDS PATRIOTISM LIKE AMERICAS RIGHT NOW.

  • @TributesCarlson-im4be
    @TributesCarlson-im4be Месяц назад +15

    Always a good day when Nikko posts Not a good day for these people though 😂😂😂.

  • @the_night_vision_FBI969_gaming
    @the_night_vision_FBI969_gaming Месяц назад +18

    we had a guy come to the gate an completely went past security lets just say we had to use pew pews and then had to clean up

    • @maryjane4432
      @maryjane4432 Месяц назад +5

      I live In Maryland and there was a guy who
      Took police on a high speed chase and then tried to go thru the gates at fort detrick and he was unalived by the gate guards like he wanted to

    • @KitannaEaston-xf7wn
      @KitannaEaston-xf7wn Месяц назад +4

      @@maryjane4432BROOOOOO I REMEMBER THAT I LIVE IN MARYLAND TOOOOOO THEY ON SOMETHING ELSE!!!!!!!!!!

    • @AmericanIdiotPolitics
      @AmericanIdiotPolitics Месяц назад

      yall actually shot him? 💀💀💀

    • @SilentHotdog28
      @SilentHotdog28 Месяц назад +1

      The military is waiting.....no begging for someone to fuck around......Because they are going to find out.

  • @gabriellabarhammusic
    @gabriellabarhammusic Месяц назад +8

    0:21 nikko just got flashbacks😂

  • @OperatorDelta_19
    @OperatorDelta_19 Месяц назад +8

    You know it’s a good day when Nikko posts

  • @joshv9139
    @joshv9139 Месяц назад +4

    The clothing allowance broke me😂😂😂 That's so damn true

  • @helenmarydickenson3847
    @helenmarydickenson3847 Месяц назад +3

    In NZ Army, vehicles were used to store sh*t from our rooms that we didn't want seen during barrack inspections. If you didn't have a car, then you would store crap in your buddies car. Nothing like a nice minimalist room for barrack inspections 😂

  • @funrun07haan50
    @funrun07haan50 Месяц назад +5

    Big iron thats a instant like

  • @joshsmith6955
    @joshsmith6955 Месяц назад +1

    A target package the second she said she was pregnant 😂😂 damn

  • @surfcirca
    @surfcirca Месяц назад +1

    Dude! when I hate being in the military, I watch your videos and remember why I love it! Thanks!

  • @danielwaters9
    @danielwaters9 Месяц назад +2

    Oh so she knows how to serve dinner 🥰❣️🤣

  • @skillfulwaffle6911
    @skillfulwaffle6911 Месяц назад +1

    THE SEC FO GUY AT 8:07 WAS MY MTI IN BMT. TSGT GREEN WAS AWESOME. He told us about the tiktok and the story behind it, he broke the window like 15 minutes into trying to be good cop lol

  • @dakotarunyan9962
    @dakotarunyan9962 Месяц назад +2

    7:18 that's called child support.😂

  • @Steady_Dormant
    @Steady_Dormant Месяц назад +2

    Nikko with a glock like "put down the 9 Jamal"😂

  • @KimberVerity
    @KimberVerity Месяц назад +2

    10:21 nikkoooooo!!! I’m from Alaska!!! I still living here too. (Love the vids ❤️)

  • @user-cp1us5tn1d
    @user-cp1us5tn1d Месяц назад +2

    love your stuff bro

  • @TK-3415
    @TK-3415 Месяц назад +1

    This too good nikko is the funniest person on earth

  • @country1116
    @country1116 Месяц назад +2

    My brother's friend was stationed in Alaska he said the cold wasn't bad it's a dry cold unlike the states

  • @joshualight3818
    @joshualight3818 Месяц назад

    Best POV inspection I ever had. I was on a 2001 Victory V92c, big loud purple motorcycle. NCO asked me to turn on my reverse lights.....

  • @willzone0295
    @willzone0295 Месяц назад +1

    I put down that I had ADHD durrinv recruitment for the Canadian Armed forces and they strait denied me with no option to appeal

  • @jessebell1930
    @jessebell1930 Месяц назад +1

    "...she knows how to serve dinner let's go..."😂😂😂

  • @sebastiannegron79
    @sebastiannegron79 Месяц назад +1

    Navy gets deployed for 6 months either in Europe or Asia like every 2 years.

  • @israelescobedo3583
    @israelescobedo3583 25 дней назад

    As soon as nick said that’s your mom got me dead on the floor 💀😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣

  • @elend9077
    @elend9077 Месяц назад +1

    Nikko, I live in Alaska, the snow is great lol

  • @assassincos6608
    @assassincos6608 Месяц назад +2

    10:22 Yepp, it’s pretty out here but you’re gonna freeze while you enjoy it lmfao

  • @lukemorin6214
    @lukemorin6214 День назад

    The SF guy who smashed the window was a MTI at my basic training

  • @jadedraney9097
    @jadedraney9097 Месяц назад +1

    I may or may not be the marine at 6:23 Nikko 😂😂

  • @Berm_Blaster
    @Berm_Blaster Месяц назад

    "ALWAYS TRACKINNN" Shane is hilarious. I miss his shorts while he was enlisted. I hope he's doing good I know he was struggling when he got out

  • @carsonconklin9039
    @carsonconklin9039 Месяц назад

    Love your videos man

  • @remywhite4377
    @remywhite4377 Месяц назад

    Ayyye, let's go. Shane made it on here! As long as we're tracking!!

  • @nishkarheera2509
    @nishkarheera2509 Месяц назад

    Whenever i have a bad day i just log on to this channel n all is right with the world again.

  • @wyattfairley8185
    @wyattfairley8185 Месяц назад +3

    The dude at the beginning is a real marine

    • @joshuahamilton3870
      @joshuahamilton3870 Месяц назад +1

      Army lol

    • @decker7452
      @decker7452 Месяц назад

      I know the guys in that clip. It happened just down the hall from my room. Wild that it ended up on this channel.

  • @hillbilly645
    @hillbilly645 Месяц назад +1

    Saying Navy doesn’t go on deployments is like saying the Earth is flat

  • @patrickellis7366
    @patrickellis7366 Месяц назад +2

    i love "military humour" is literally just British humour. we gay with the bros from day 1

  • @jonathangouveia7650
    @jonathangouveia7650 Месяц назад +2

    These sus videos are hilarious 🤣😆 love the reactions videos 👍

  • @CaptDestro
    @CaptDestro Месяц назад +1

    I mean he looks good in the maid outfit atleast. 😂 nGL $20 is $20

  • @meeplymoon8391
    @meeplymoon8391 Месяц назад

    when he said "smash"... i felt that.

  • @Maddie-mf2tb
    @Maddie-mf2tb Месяц назад

    Bro I was so bored I’m so happy nikko posted

  • @Keirfey
    @Keirfey Месяц назад

    A good hour, maybe? In warm conditions. Bodies cool quickly. To answer your demented question 😂

  • @depressoexpresso8190
    @depressoexpresso8190 Месяц назад +1

    That SF video breaking the window came from Gowen Field boise idaho. She was a dependent that was divorced by her husband, and she tried to run the gate

  • @joshuahamilton3870
    @joshuahamilton3870 Месяц назад

    That 1st dude did that while I was in AIT lmao

  • @StevesSimStation
    @StevesSimStation Месяц назад +1

    Wtf?? Vehicle inspections? Never once had that in the 9 years I was in!

  • @ditolove5240
    @ditolove5240 Месяц назад +1

    2:36
    Thats AIT not basic, you can tell by their star patches

  • @isaiahgonzalez3385
    @isaiahgonzalez3385 Месяц назад

    THE FIRST ONES WILDDDD XD yallll weirrdddd

  • @CC-7274
    @CC-7274 Месяц назад +1

    LETS GO WE GOT ANOTHER ONE

  • @Elijap129
    @Elijap129 Месяц назад

    I do not know a thing about military humor yet. I understood it perfectly

  • @racheltroy1438
    @racheltroy1438 Месяц назад

    Nikko the best on youtube

  • @EMD766
    @EMD766 Месяц назад +3

    How much?
    😂😂😂

  • @roberts2557
    @roberts2557 Месяц назад

    love ya bro

  • @ghostfirefire5494
    @ghostfirefire5494 Месяц назад

    I wonder if it's Mic has ever broken because he hits it so many times lol love the vid

  • @Benwut
    @Benwut Месяц назад +4

    Honestly bro, thanks so much for being so fucking funny. You were on god the only thing keeping me going through fucking exam week when I was at my lowest last monday through to today. Keep these vids coming dude.

  • @ParkerWillson-su1gd
    @ParkerWillson-su1gd Месяц назад

    I’m here in the first 8 mins just saying this is my favorite channel

  • @Funny-Republican
    @Funny-Republican Месяц назад

    Love your vids

  • @jyotikumar6200
    @jyotikumar6200 Месяц назад

    not the jet fuel HAHAHA ☠☠

  • @hollyjones3686
    @hollyjones3686 Месяц назад

    Hey Nico, been watching your channel for a while. Just wanted to say your contents hilarious and that’s why now I wanna be a crayon eater

  • @alaskan_nightmare
    @alaskan_nightmare Месяц назад

    "Nobody wants to go there!" Ahahaha

  • @kyleedwards2402
    @kyleedwards2402 Месяц назад

    "Mmmm good toes" is what that man said.

  • @dylanpelo
    @dylanpelo Месяц назад

    So at Offutt AFB a few years back, a drunk driver ran the gate to try and lose the local PD.
    That's the last bad decision he ever made.

  • @jamescatalfamo3644
    @jamescatalfamo3644 Месяц назад

    That first video makes me miss him where my battle boo I mean buddy at😂

  • @Loneboys46
    @Loneboys46 Месяц назад

    Love the vid nikko

  • @jamesdehart7135
    @jamesdehart7135 Месяц назад

    Curently waiting on the clothing allowance 🤣

  • @xXReconSniperXx11
    @xXReconSniperXx11 23 дня назад

    bro niko is definetly seems like a coast gaurd

  • @Keirfey
    @Keirfey Месяц назад

    I just need a spotter for lifting and stretches 😆

  • @frontdetectingww1393
    @frontdetectingww1393 Месяц назад +1

    Nikko please do a reaction on the new Air Force EOD recruitment video,
    Big support from Italy 🇮🇹💪

  • @ElijahGrant-iu1wy
    @ElijahGrant-iu1wy Месяц назад +1

    this video is so funny😂

  • @American_Tactics
    @American_Tactics Месяц назад

    My dad was in the airborne AKA “me go jump out plane and me get more moneys” but he was deployed in Alaska

  • @Djjotheman
    @Djjotheman Месяц назад

    Mining and military humour is very similar XD

  • @Nate-zg7tf
    @Nate-zg7tf Месяц назад +1

    Nikko your funny asf

  • @SlyClone96
    @SlyClone96 Месяц назад

    My buddy wanted to get stationed in Alaska and that is where he went. He said he loved it

  • @Big_Man_06
    @Big_Man_06 Месяц назад

    I can confirm the poolie part (I just finished MEPS)

  • @Iron_Road
    @Iron_Road Месяц назад

    Where I was in the Navy, they didn't make us do vehicle inspections at all. They just wanted generic info turned into the base police.

  • @justinstephenson-mu5mi
    @justinstephenson-mu5mi Месяц назад

    Fort Richardson was a dope duty station

  • @loganhergott5855
    @loganhergott5855 Месяц назад

    That SF NCO was my MTI in bmt

  • @NostalgicGen-Z2003-nt5ji
    @NostalgicGen-Z2003-nt5ji Месяц назад

    Honey, Nikko uploaded, bout to be a good day

  • @user-oh9ks9gz9l
    @user-oh9ks9gz9l Месяц назад

    "Thank you Corporal

  • @Krazzsplorers25
    @Krazzsplorers25 Месяц назад

    8:17 the guy should've said "collateral damage" in response to "I'm pregnant"

  • @xxHarlow
    @xxHarlow Месяц назад

    they only do vic inspections now before 4 days and leave now :P

  • @Ok_Friend-il9of
    @Ok_Friend-il9of Месяц назад

    My supervisor at my job was in the navy. She’s awesome

  • @stevedogz
    @stevedogz Месяц назад

    Hey thanks for using my video 💪🏽💪🏽💪🏽

  • @testhardtest
    @testhardtest Месяц назад

    @nikkoortiz Have you ever played Fallout New Vegas? No matter how much you hate western/country/trail music, you will be made to love this song just like how bootcamp made you love eating ice cream even though you know you'll be made into a chocolate chip cookie afterwards.

  • @jacksonpoole5869
    @jacksonpoole5869 Месяц назад

    Nikko: 🎤💥👋

  • @emilybeerbower5575
    @emilybeerbower5575 Месяц назад

    Lol I joke with my coworkers all the time like that and they tell me somethings wrong with me...and I just say " probably " 👍🏻

  • @sonjatheierl1
    @sonjatheierl1 Месяц назад

    😂air force they really do all have huge thermas jugs

  • @kameronmyles2013
    @kameronmyles2013 Месяц назад

    Bro tried foot fungus for 10 bucks. Wiiild

  • @BMarie774
    @BMarie774 Месяц назад

    0:28 and this is exactly how you get thrush and angular chelitis.

  • @Sensei1920
    @Sensei1920 Месяц назад

    Oh? He the barracks bunny today 0:05 he ain't escaping

  • @simpradar9727
    @simpradar9727 Месяц назад

    8:30 this was my MTI in basic lmao

  • @randallbiggs-shaw5517
    @randallbiggs-shaw5517 Месяц назад

    Dude I was in fort wainwright and your load freezes before it hits your battle buddies as... As I was saying... It's fucking cold!