Y'all I think Peeps is such a wife guy he actually can't see any social context outside of his spouse. Especially between the runescape thing, and the present thing now lol (To be clear this isn't a criticism I think it's very sweet but this is a clear pattern)
I still think he's 100% correct about the runescape thing. It's a video game with alleged friends dog they will understand. Heck if it was my mate on the other end I'd be telling him to get lost and go have sex with his wife haha.
I've never felt such a rush of catharsis as I have with the update on the slow eater story. It felt like the fucking sea parted and continents shifted to vindicate my immediate reaction that she was in the wrong.
For the second post, the girlfriend is being insanely rude, not for being anxious about opening the gift but fir not once taking responsibility for her own inaction. I've had really bad anxiety before, I've done similar things where I buried my head in the sand and put off doing something that I could have had a conversation about. Even still, in those instances, I never got mad at people for not understanding when I was having difficulty communicating what was wrong. If you have anxiety about these things, you have to have a level of self awareness to realize you've manufactured a scenario that only makes your anxiety worse. Instead, she expects her boyfriend to tell his parents to back off about questionly, politely, if she liked the gift they bought her. This is HER problem she needs to solve, it's up to her to communicate and, if she can't she needs to understand why the people are reacting to her the way they are. Anxiety isn't a free pass to excuse your behaviour, it just explains it. She buried her head in the sand and got mad that the problem didn't go away because she ignored it. The bf, while is intentions were good, shouldn't have opened the gift. He should have tried harder to understand what was going on before acting. Even still, I am far more mad about the gf acted than the bf.
the biden announcement dropped while i was playing in the 3v3 @ nats and you literally saw a wave of people just stop the games they were in to discuss or check their phones, it was incredible
I agree that the gift girlfriend is been obstuse. As someone that struggles with gifts just like this lady I'd appreciate my bf opening it for me and maybe helping me send a proper thank you message to his parents so they don't feel like I don't appreciate their generosity.
Some form of communication or timeline would be all you need if she couldn't tell him because the lack of communication created an emergency on his part i have a similar anxiety as long as i give a timeline no stress
Yeah i agree with joseph on the second story, the girl was being rude and selfish by taking so long to open the gift without even saying anything to the parents who clearly cared about how she felt about it, even if you have anxiety around social situations like opening gifts you still can't use that to justify ignoring other people's feelings that much and for so long, that's again, just selfish and rude, she created a difficult situation for everyone involved that could have been easily avoided if she tried to get over her problem in the first place, but she instead did nothing but make things worse in every way possible. Hell there's a lot of solutions that don't even involve opening the gift, you can just lie and say you opened it, you can tell someone else to open it for you and then give away the gift if you really don't want to have it, you can talk to your partner to come up with a solution that works for everyone involved, but you have to do SOMETHING, really ANYTHING but just letting time pass and causing a snowball effect where something small that could have been prevented becomes a real issue.
@@DarkusFireBlaze3582 as someone with similar anxiety i get it...but it's not something so big that you can't work out your feelings about it, but instead she did nothing lol
There's two kinds of slow eaters: the slow and the no. I was very ready to be like 'what an absolute weiner' but uh turns out he found the rare no eater, rumor has it Kelly is still at that middle eastern restaurant
A token about the gift girlfriend's acting stupid: of course she was! It seems silly, which is mostly likely why she was so hesitant on communicating why she was feeling the way she was to her partner, since it is something that should be super trivial but she can't do. Admitting that "yeah sorry my anxiety is so bad that opening a box in my house causes me to start tweaking" to your partner and their parents is super embarrassing and probably the last thing they wanted to do
I was at MtG locals when the news of the shooting dropped, we cared for about fifteen seconds until someone dropped a Farewell and we had a new problem at hand
2nd one is tough but mbt and Danny are completely correct imo. Having mental issues is nothing to be ashamed of, but if you don't take care of them and they start impacting other people, it is your fault. The bf shouldn't have opened the gift, but honestly she was shutting down on communication, so what's he supposed to do?
As someone with turbo anxiety that also doesn't like opening things in front of people: Yeah she's being an asshole. Just let him open it and tell his folks you like it, it's LITERALLY A BAG YOU SAID YOU WANTED! At the very least say thanks to them, come on
That whole situation was super frustrating. I also get really bad anxiety but when it gets to the point that you are putting it off for so long that its actively causing problems it literally just makes the anxiety worse. I like that they talked at the end, but she really needs to get help at that point. You have to learn to work through the anxiety (especially if you have a predisposing condition) otherwise you loterally just become a slave to it.
@spartan4613 Or, at worst, let someone else deal with it for you so it's out of the equation. The way she reacted was more than rude, it was full on mean and dismissive.
The slow eater story is wild to me. Is this a known medical condition or something? Being genuine here btw, I wanna know if there are more cases like Kelly where you just don't eat at all unless nobody is actively talking to you.
A friend and I split a bottle of Malort the night before a big legacy tournament. I woke them up at 3 am because I puke really loud. We still got up at 7 am to both go 2-3-drop Good times
The only thing with the second guy is he missed the out of just lying and saying “yeah she tottaly opened it and loved it.” though part of me does wonder if the wife ever wouldve opened then. Its entirely possible she wouldve just pushed the thing so far out of her mind it just doesnt get opened
That seems like it'd just cause more problems or just as many, what if she comes around and wants to message the parents? What if the parents call and ask her for more details? What if next time they all hang out the parents say that they appreciated the thank you message? And lastly what if she feels betrayed by the husband? To "help" her without telling her, treating her like a kid
Honestly, long time mbt viewer, I found this podcast last week and I’ve just been listening to it constantly. Idk what it is about you three but you’re extremely entertaining
@@MrJohnCarrol There were options he could have used that didn't breach the privacy of the gift. Can I forgive him for it? Yeah, without even thinking. But it was still among the worst options.
1. Correct 2. Correct 3. Correct Bottle Night mentioned: 5 episodes (making its triumphant return to the pod! - one on patreon) KILLS: 3 (one on Patreon) see ya next time :)
The update of the third story reminds me of the episode of How I Met Your Mother, where the friends have annoying habits and the others only notice after they mention them
holy hell, I’m not sure if this is the funniest thing i’ve ever heard or i have severe brain damage this point. fr tho you’re all independently so funny it’s wonderful having you play off each other.
About the scond story, does she feel better if she doesn't receive anything? My first reaction to all this is that if you know she struggles with receiving and opening gifts, the correct thing to do is to give nothing.
As a slow eating mocker, I still think it was pretty assholish of the guy to see that he has the power of selection and promptly think "I can use this to install a time limit." I think this was always going to function more as a trap than as something that would actually help her eat faster. Unfortunately, given the results I have to stand with him anyway.
I mean I don't really think that's a fair assessment. The dude already learned from the woman's husband that when they eat together he does have to sort of ignore her so that she can focus on eating. At least from what I'm getting here, that gave the dude this idea that she could be incentivized to eat quicker. You can't really just ignore her during a social outing, so that's not on the table, but going out to eat at a restaurant that clearly outlines a strict eating time limit? What better motivator to get chompin. So at least from where I see the story, it didn't feel malicious, like I would have expected her to speed up as well.
There's acceptable slow eating, and there's spending 2 hours literally not eating and then having the audacity to complain about it. Time is just non-existent as a concept to Kelly
@@ab2aasd I think her asking to go to a place that serves food if they are going out afterwards anyways is fine.... But you can't expect people to watch you eat all the way passed midnight like come on. Half an hour to an hour max, maybe a little more if everyone is still having a good time, but you gotta get your s*** together or take it home at that point.
The update wasn't about the first dinner though. He had gathered evidence (while keeping his wife updated) that it wasn't just him, then the wife agreed to let him arrange a test. The test was the timed BBQ. This scenario (if real) is one of the few times a mundane complaint seems dumb, but digging deeper there is a REAL concern about it. Honestly my alarms went off when he described her as nibbling on everything. Even slow eaters I know don't do nibbles. They take a modest bite, maybe chew awhile, then talk for way longer. Actively eating slow like that is not normal as far as I've seen.
Just as Joseph said, there are some things that people just need to get over, and if they can't do it by themselves then they need to get advice from either a trusted person or a professional to help them get over that thing.
So today's theme is just a list of reasons why folks need to communicate their issues because those last 2 in particular can be summed up before the updates as "dude, could you just tell me why?" Glad the second post ended up with a happy ending though.
In fairness, the 3rd post was well communicated, just needed the update to reveal he gathered evidence and everyone was on board with the process. One of the few times making a profile is reasonable; When your legit complaint sounds ridiculous. Can't really communicate your way out of that without recipes.
I love how 1st world country problems are "omg how am i ever going to react properly to this designer bag gift" while other people in other places be like "well i can either pay rent or eat wonder which one will i pick" lol
Hah, going on about books getting into airports and I'm thinking like, I should mention If Books Could Kill, only for them to name drop it moments later. Good podcast that
#1 The parent is at fault and not for allowing the "divorce". The parent is at fault for not removing the dog from the situation before it became an issue. I respect that even a four year old can learn, however, they don't exactly have the background for these things. Remove the dog from the situation so the kids can play together, then tell the other kid's parents about the situation so they can handle it how they feel best. Of note: I do not approve of forcing kids to play with someone they don't want to. I side with the boys on that. Same with how I am highly against forcing a kid to accept hugs and kisses from people (generally relatives) if they don't want to. Self autonomy is important, even as a kid.
#2 I appreciate where the lady is coming from. It is an Expensive gift. If she doesn't come from a rich family, such a gift would be super heavy weight on her. While to them, the gift isn't a big deal, we don't know how much the bag costs. There are bags that cost more than a car. Something like that can be quite heavy on a person. Not opening the gift is a mental thing where she can basically trick herself into thinking it doesn't exist until she does. Plus, we don't know if she has some form of mental health problem. The parents are in the clear. However, the guy is a problem. He should not have opened it. He should have explained it to the parents better. He should have talked to her and gotten more out of her. No, the boyfriend wasn't "trying". He got the surface answer, shrugged his shoulders, and then went and took her agency away because it was the easy way out for him. He didn't ask if opening it for her would help, he just did it. You can totally call him the AH for that. As for the lady and how she reacted. She needed to say something to the parents. Oh, and therapy. She needs therapy and he needs to go to couples therapy. Talk it out. The boys talked about pushing too far, but sometimes you have to. This isn't going to go away. If she can't open up about this sort of thing with him, then they really need couples therapy. Oh, and getting a gift isn't always a "nice" thing. In this case it likely is, but gifts can be given maliciously. If you give a gift expecting something in return, it isn't a gift. You can feel disappointed about not getting a thank you, but you can not require it. On the update: Holy moly! Every other day? The hell? How did the boys not catch that!
"he has the physiognomy of someone who's very easy to bully" I mean you guys actually hang out with Gage a man who I'm convinced only achieves any satisfaction in his life by people being slightly mean to him so I guess your experts?
Joseph: the problem is that this guy is making wild assumptions and jumping to conclusions about what his girlfriend wants Peeps: so he should have tried to ask for more clarifications and try to find a solution she would be happy with? Joseph: no
I've heard it floated around that Biden intentionally waited until the RNC was over before bowing out, and considering how throughly unprepared Republicans were for the announcement it would be hilarious if it were true.
Okay about the whole gift girl parents thing, I think one possibility is there’s some kind of context with the girl and the parents. Maybe she has some kind of major issue with them, but knows it’s not something that can be solved so is just attempting to avoid them and the bf either doesn’t see that or doesn’t want to. Idk that’s just a vibe I get from this kind of irrationality. I feel like everybody is assuming they have a fine relationship but in reality plenty of people have horrible relationships with their partners parents. It’s sometimes literal irreconcilable differences that basically can’t be solved so the only thing to do is attempt to avoid them. There’s not context that this is the case, just saying it is a possibility.
2nd one is annoying, he’s definitely not the jerk. After a full week it’s clear the girlfriend is not going to open it and just wants to put it off and not get over it and enabling that is rude, especially having to play defense for her in every social situation. At some point you have to be an adult and at least explain it to them yourself if not work towards getting over it.
As a Slow Eater myself, I get sad quite often when people complain about how slow I tend to eat things - to the point I spent over an hour to eat a shared pizza, for example. That may have probably caused enough harm for me that I now force myself to eat quickly and with less pauses, but then I get sick and feel like I'm about to throw up, even while eating the same amount as everyone else. I have constant reflux issues because of it, so when I "have to" eat in public, I tend to not eat that much or, if we're in a rush, I put a mask on so people don't see me with a nauseous expression.
Ok but there's slow eater and SLOW eater. Like the girl didn't eat a single thing in more than 2 hours. That's not slow eating. That's not eating at all.
With all do respect if you can not eat at a normal pace without getting stomach issues you should probably see a doctor. Now considering it's nausea and reflux there is a very decent chance its you getting in your own head but either way probably good to check if their isn't a serious problem with your stomach.
All there is to it is everyone giving equal consideration to everyone. People should give you time to eat, slow eating is not a crime. If everyone is feeling the time pressure pack up the food and take it with you so you dont go hungry and not everyone feels they are waiting on one person. Most everywhere will let you pack food if you ask nowadays. If it is making you sick I agree with the other reply that is worth trying to talk to a doctor about if you haven't already. Especially something like a shared pizza that sounds like a nightmare.
At the end you can almost hear the sizzling and steam coming from Jordans brain trying to comprehend the person in question. I'm a slow eater myself. I just like to take my time with good food. But this person stretches this to an extreme. I still think that OP was at least a bit of an ass for kind of putting a spotlight on this person. But jeez, you gotta have some self awareness at some point...don't make people wait for you (for an unreasonable amount of time) Also, pro tip for other slow eaters: If the people you're with are already done while you still have like half your plate full...just ask for staff to pack it up. At least where I live I haven't come across a food place that doesn't do this. This way you don't have to stress, don't have to inconvenience others AND on top of all, you have something nice for dinner/ the next day.
In OP's defense though, it's a legit problem that was easily proven after a short amount of research. And his wife (and Kelly's husband) were kept updated as he went about proving it. And they supported him. This is a rare situation where a shallow-sounding complaint, after research, reveals a possibly serious issue that needs attention. In basically any other scenario he'd be the a-hole. But with context (6 HOURS WHEN HUNGRY?!) nah, that dude had every reason to stonewall. He was a jerk about it at first, but like.....
Can’t believe we managed to prove god is real before the 30th episode…not only that now these 3 gentlemen can move on to play Redemption the card game.
It's crazy how wrong you are for the first one it's important that kids understand that it's important to play/interact with everyone, and not exclude someone or isolate someone else; also THEY'RE FOUR, it's not like it's high school these kids literally don't know much at all! Ofc the daughter shouldn't be forced to stay in pretend marriage or always just play with him, but they need to be amicable and play all toghether. The only other important thing is to make sure that the other kid apologizes and it's all good. Kids should learn first how to be social and try to get along with everyone, and then learn to set boundaries, ofc you can and should still explain what a boundary is but at that age it's much more important to play with everyone. I don't think that the mom is an asshole, because her hearth was in the right place but I think, like the hosts, she doesn't understand how being social and inclusive is important to learn for little kids, a lot of bullies and mean kid start off because they never really learn how to ask for an apology and accept it
I have mixed feelings on the second story. I am definitely on Jordan's side here with there needed to be better communication on his part and he should've tried to talk to her about why this makes her feel stressed and uncomfortable to try and figure out how to be accommodating. Telling her about her parents have been asking/are concerned about her response/lack of response to the gift probably didnt help with the anxiety. I think hr could've communicated better too that to his parents by saying, "she has anxiety around opening gifts. Its not a you thing, this is with any kind of gift, its nothing personal". That could've alleviated some of their worries. Also opening the gift without the girlfriends permission isn't going to help things, its just honestly going to make the situation worse imo. On the inverse, while anxiety can be extremely irrational and i really do feel for her, as i also have some irrational anxieties that i really can't explain, i do think there needs to be better communication on her part about this anxiety that she needs to work through. I think she needs to communicate to the people around her about how she feels about gifts. Maybe suggest not having s surprise element to it, maybe just like give the gift unwrap? I think it's something she needs to work on through therapy. I think its a little rude to wait that long to not open it, since it has been over a week, i would be more on her side if it was like a day or two. Overall, i think both, to a certain extent, are in the wrong a bit for this and both need to do a bit better with communication.
With the update, im glad the they were able to work through it and resolve the issue with no huge problems and that they both have a better understanding of each other. They both acknowledged their faults and are moving forward. Good update
Not really. The fact that it's not a problem when nobody talks to her and her comments about the BBQ place not being 2 hours suggests pretty major time blindness. That combined with not seeming to have a all that strong hunger drive suggests some sort of neurological condition. These are both symptoms of ADHD but I have yet to meet a fellow ADHDer that doesn't shove food in their face at mach 3.
@jellewijckmans4836 It's possible she was homeschooled or similarly sheltered, in a way that enabled her to eat a meal for an entire day. Like, as a "wait I'm hungry?" ADHDer myself, my vacuum came from lunch being 15 minutes up until high school. If I had the opportunity to eat slow, I probably be a slow eater today.
In the first story you guys kind of ignore that she could have just played with the dog together with him. This combined with the constantly asking this other kid to marry her until he relents does suggest a level of entitlement both the mom and you gloss over. Now they are 4 it's not weird for them to be entitled little shits. It's a defining feature of being a toddler but doesn't mean it shouldn't be addressed. Also best for her to learn that she like anyone will always lose to a dog.
for the slow eating story, she was for sure being really excessive with the slow eating, but the story started feeling like bullying her after the update, it just made me feel really bad.
Eating that slowly is just incompatible with most food based socialisation to be fair. Even if it's not some moral failing, she needs to be self aware enough to work around it rather than insisting others bend to her needs.
@@davidragon1 like I said, what she was doing was insane, but I feel like tricking her into a situation where she had to confront her slow eating is like, so unnecessary and then the way they talked to her afterwards? this woman must be impossibly stubborn to warrant that kind of response.
@@thebluehollow It's kind of about how we're framing the situation. He engineered a situation in which she would have limited (still 2 hours) time to eat. I don't think that's deceitful necessarily or "tricking her" unless they sprung it on her last minute. She is informed of the time limit ahead of the meal. Again, this seems like she is lacking self awareness and/or time awareness. The comments after the meal may have been somewhat confrontational, but it's clearly a situation that was going to create issues in the near future and needed to be thought about. 2 hours for dinner I don't think is a "malicious set up".
@@davidragon1 yeah I can’t argue with that. the fact that she just acted like she had no idea about the time despite being told by the servers is pretty damning
@@thebluehollow Also that (as far as I could tell) OP was planning this with his wife and Kelly's husband as a stress test. And after the proof was revealed(in alarming fashion at that) he basically exposed a real issue they need to address ASAP.
Serious answer to a (I hope) not serious question at the beginning. There is a logically consistent reason to wish Trump well, but still think he's evil: it's called "Murder is wrong, always"
So about the bag one. I understand, I think, because I get extreme anxiety when opening or responding to texts or emails. I will wait a week or sometimes even a month before doing it because I'm scared. I'm scared because things might be bad. I don't like it and have asked people to check for me before. It makes me feel really bad and uncomfortable. The BF could have attempted to explain the situation of how their parents feel and talk to her about it instead of literally doing the thing she didn't want to do without asking her and thinking he's going to solve it with this passive-aggressive-esque placement of where the would see it. He did that because he didnt want to deal with his parents or explain things. She literally did nothing wrong. If I gave someone a gift and they felt this way I'd be like "ok". I realize boomers don't think this way and are a lot of the time stuck in their ways but they are OLD who CARES. Really though the guy is 100% the asshole, the parents don't understand, she feels anxious and bad probably, and NOBODY IS COMMUNICATING WITH ANYONE. I've posted this here before but 99% of these situations could be solved by just communicating with other people. It is not rude to not thank someone for a gift, they didn't ask for it and being upset that someone doesn't respond how you expect them to is rude. I don't say thank you to people often because I feel like they don't actually care. Clearly, she, like myself probably doesn't think normally and I hate situations where people just assume this, the person is normal and exactly like you. It would not be hard in this situation to be patient, instead people pushed her until she got upset and felt even worse. The gift will be opened eventually. Messages will be responded to eventually. Things are okay, and people need to make better assumptions and communicate more.
This before voting and the update: The girlfriend not send any thank you message is rude for sure. However, the guy is an asshole for opening the gift. The main issue is that he believes he's solving the problem, maybe through inferences of what the problem is or as a good gesture, but he's taken all the agency away from her while she has solution and it's time and comfortability. He isn't acknowledging her feelings about it nor trusting that she will be able to handle them. He doesn't need to understand them to stand by them and relay that to his parents. Him just saying "Hey, she hasn't opened it yet, she wants to open it at her own time and I'll let you know when she does" and leave it at that. If they have questions, they can have a discussion after she opens it when the pressure is off her
Gonna have to disagree with the guy "not having to understand" part. Like, this could have all been prevented if the gf simply explained why she doesn't feel comfortable opening the gift. That was all that was needed. Also you comment about he was taking away the gf's agency, but at some point when someone keeps pushing and delaying something you either have to give them more forceful nudges or just do it for them, and it should be your fault for having to do either one. The guy is not the AH imo. No matter what he does he is going to make someone upset, and he simply picked the path that would make the least amount of people upset.
@@obiesenpai3869If this was something more time sensitive, I would be more inclined to agree but that wasn't the case. The bf had pressure from his parents, as well as excitement for her reaction, but instead of standing behind his gf's choice, he elected to just do it to get it over with. I'm not gonna speculate what may have happened if things happened differently, since it did work out, but for me, trusting my partner's feelings and actions will always come before my need to do something "for their sake"
I'm gonna be bold, go against the 2-1, and agree with Peeps here. I do think that opening the gift for her, especially without asking, was an asshole move. Now, I'm not unsympathetic to the guy's position, and I do think the girl was also a bit of an asshole here, even if I very deeply identify with the experience of getting all caught up in my fucked-up anxious brain about something that's really easy to fix, but this isn't a zero sum game. Ultimately, it was a pretty minor asshole move, and he certainly had the best of intentions in doing so, but it really comes down to this: if you do an asshole thing out of the sincere belief that you are doing a kindness, that doesn't change the fact that you did an asshole thing! Admittedly, it absolutely makes him much less of an asshole that he was doing it out of a sincere desire to help, rather than as an attempt to be, like passive-aggressive or whatever, but the fact of the matter is that I believe that both the intent AND the results matter, and fundamentally, the result was that she felt hurt by him going over her head and opening the gift. Thankfully, both of them sat down and apologized to eachother for their respective screw-ups and actually communicated, but I think this is a classic, if very minor, example of what the ESH rating is for on the subreddit. Both of them did a fucky wucky, and thankfully it worked out in the end.
Man; Is seggually uncomfortable about girlfriend eating cheese balls Women; is upset about a birthday present “Aw the poor women baby she’s so uncomfy :(((“
The cheeseball problem is the man is cucking himself for some reason and clearly has some sexual hangups to workpast. Gifts are maybe twice a year and the gf could just solve it all by saying she doesnt like gifts and asking for none from now on
What do you mean you couldn't vote for biden, peeps. What's your other choice, dude? The fact you were anything other than "Im voting against Trump no matter what" is cringe
What a good episode, I think Joseph on story 2 has gotta be top 3 shittiest Councel opinions of all time. She just doesn't like gifts, she doesn't appreciate them the same way other people do. She has trouble expressing that, but why does she really have to do so in depth? What justification would she need to give to simply not have that as part of her love language? Why is it something she has to "get over?" She is kind of an asshole for not clarifying what she does or does not like with others close to her, but the guy forcing this form of appreciation on her that she clearly does not like is massive asshole behavior. It's a breach of trust and respect. The guy should have absolutely done a better job trying to understand better, and if she keeps being kinda shitty about it then she is more of an asshole.
Also just another classic gaslighting episode. All of her friends know that opening gifts make her uncomfortable. She did send a thank you to the parents after receiving the package. She did say that the texts were making her uncomfortable. The parents asked if they were making her uncomfortable, and she already said yes to that, the dude doesn't even say how he responded to the parents question. She later clarifies post-opening that she felt awkward because she thought it was the bag and knew it was so expensive. She DOES communicate, albeit not as strongly as she could've, but again, how much does she need to say to justify her feelings?
![CWC 4th Listening Session with Speaker Prof. Dr. Ilia Delio OSF [ENGLISH]](/img/1.gif)
As a four year old i'm glad i have this podcast to give me life changing advice
IM NOT 😞
@@MrZacdeath I mean, you'd think that, but you'd be quite surprised.
I think it’s time for Little Timmy to lawyer up and hit the gym.
Y'all I think Peeps is such a wife guy he actually can't see any social context outside of his spouse. Especially between the runescape thing, and the present thing now lol
(To be clear this isn't a criticism I think it's very sweet but this is a clear pattern)
I have this feeling that if the genders were swapped, Peeps would be singing a different tune.
It's like that "guy who's only see one movie" meme, but for people lol
Honestly based
The 2nd post arguments felt like he was bending over backwards to absolve the gf of fault
I still think he's 100% correct about the runescape thing. It's a video game with alleged friends dog they will understand. Heck if it was my mate on the other end I'd be telling him to get lost and go have sex with his wife haha.
I've never felt such a rush of catharsis as I have with the update on the slow eater story. It felt like the fucking sea parted and continents shifted to vindicate my immediate reaction that she was in the wrong.
For the second post, the girlfriend is being insanely rude, not for being anxious about opening the gift but fir not once taking responsibility for her own inaction. I've had really bad anxiety before, I've done similar things where I buried my head in the sand and put off doing something that I could have had a conversation about. Even still, in those instances, I never got mad at people for not understanding when I was having difficulty communicating what was wrong. If you have anxiety about these things, you have to have a level of self awareness to realize you've manufactured a scenario that only makes your anxiety worse.
Instead, she expects her boyfriend to tell his parents to back off about questionly, politely, if she liked the gift they bought her.
This is HER problem she needs to solve, it's up to her to communicate and, if she can't she needs to understand why the people are reacting to her the way they are.
Anxiety isn't a free pass to excuse your behaviour, it just explains it. She buried her head in the sand and got mad that the problem didn't go away because she ignored it.
The bf, while is intentions were good, shouldn't have opened the gift. He should have tried harder to understand what was going on before acting. Even still, I am far more mad about the gf acted than the bf.
That third one is such a plot twist.
Just when I'm feeling down the councel lifts me back up
“You’re a grown ass woman
Open the fuckin birthday gift”
THEY FOUND IT
THEY FOUND THE SLOWPOKE GIRL IRL
the biden announcement dropped while i was playing in the 3v3 @ nats and you literally saw a wave of people just stop the games they were in to discuss or check their phones, it was incredible
Never have I heard someone that needs to lawyer up and hit the gym more, than that 4 year old girl, remember people MEN. CAN’T. DO. ANYTHING
I agree that the gift girlfriend is been obstuse. As someone that struggles with gifts just like this lady I'd appreciate my bf opening it for me and maybe helping me send a proper thank you message to his parents so they don't feel like I don't appreciate their generosity.
First question starts 16:20
Second question starts 27:30
Third question starts 52:38
worth mentioning that severe anxiety can be hard to put into words, and there can be the fear of saying something making things worse.
Some form of communication or timeline would be all you need if she couldn't tell him because the lack of communication created an emergency on his part i have a similar anxiety as long as i give a timeline no stress
Yeah i agree with joseph on the second story, the girl was being rude and selfish by taking so long to open the gift without even saying anything to the parents who clearly cared about how she felt about it, even if you have anxiety around social situations like opening gifts you still can't use that to justify ignoring other people's feelings that much and for so long, that's again, just selfish and rude, she created a difficult situation for everyone involved that could have been easily avoided if she tried to get over her problem in the first place, but she instead did nothing but make things worse in every way possible.
Hell there's a lot of solutions that don't even involve opening the gift, you can just lie and say you opened it, you can tell someone else to open it for you and then give away the gift if you really don't want to have it, you can talk to your partner to come up with a solution that works for everyone involved, but you have to do SOMETHING, really ANYTHING but just letting time pass and causing a snowball effect where something small that could have been prevented becomes a real issue.
Not to also mention that she was doing all this because she was afraid of being disappointed. Like damn.
@@DarkusFireBlaze3582 as someone with similar anxiety i get it...but it's not something so big that you can't work out your feelings about it, but instead she did nothing lol
There's two kinds of slow eaters: the slow and the no.
I was very ready to be like 'what an absolute weiner' but uh turns out he found the rare no eater, rumor has it Kelly is still at that middle eastern restaurant
A token about the gift girlfriend's acting stupid: of course she was! It seems silly, which is mostly likely why she was so hesitant on communicating why she was feeling the way she was to her partner, since it is something that should be super trivial but she can't do. Admitting that "yeah sorry my anxiety is so bad that opening a box in my house causes me to start tweaking" to your partner and their parents is super embarrassing and probably the last thing they wanted to do
I was at MtG locals when the news of the shooting dropped, we cared for about fifteen seconds until someone dropped a Farewell and we had a new problem at hand
Mbt being extremely "I will eat the food my wife left in the fridge" coded with the 2nd one
2nd one is tough but mbt and Danny are completely correct imo. Having mental issues is nothing to be ashamed of, but if you don't take care of them and they start impacting other people, it is your fault. The bf shouldn't have opened the gift, but honestly she was shutting down on communication, so what's he supposed to do?
As someone with turbo anxiety that also doesn't like opening things in front of people:
Yeah she's being an asshole. Just let him open it and tell his folks you like it, it's LITERALLY A BAG YOU SAID YOU WANTED! At the very least say thanks to them, come on
That whole situation was super frustrating. I also get really bad anxiety but when it gets to the point that you are putting it off for so long that its actively causing problems it literally just makes the anxiety worse.
I like that they talked at the end, but she really needs to get help at that point. You have to learn to work through the anxiety (especially if you have a predisposing condition) otherwise you loterally just become a slave to it.
@spartan4613
Or, at worst, let someone else deal with it for you so it's out of the equation. The way she reacted was more than rude, it was full on mean and dismissive.
The slow eater story is wild to me. Is this a known medical condition or something? Being genuine here btw, I wanna know if there are more cases like Kelly where you just don't eat at all unless nobody is actively talking to you.
A friend and I split a bottle of Malort the night before a big legacy tournament. I woke them up at 3 am because I puke really loud. We still got up at 7 am to both go 2-3-drop
Good times
The only thing with the second guy is he missed the out of just lying and saying “yeah she tottaly opened it and loved it.” though part of me does wonder if the wife ever wouldve opened then. Its entirely possible she wouldve just pushed the thing so far out of her mind it just doesnt get opened
i thought about that too but then what if the parents are like "ooo send pictures" or something like that. it does have potential weaknesses
@@passtheyaoii mean u just double down - take it out of the box and send a picture - you can just be really obtuse about it if they press further
That seems like it'd just cause more problems or just as many, what if she comes around and wants to message the parents? What if the parents call and ask her for more details? What if next time they all hang out the parents say that they appreciated the thank you message?
And lastly what if she feels betrayed by the husband? To "help" her without telling her, treating her like a kid
Nah your parents know when you're lying
Honestly, long time mbt viewer, I found this podcast last week and I’ve just been listening to it constantly. Idk what it is about you three but you’re extremely entertaining
The guy in the second one is such in a bad position where every fucking decision he could take was a bad one. I feel bad for him.
And yet Peeps still thinks he was in the wrong, truly not beating the misandrist allegations.....
@@MrJohnCarrol I mean he kinda was in the wrong (they both were) but yeah any decision he made was probably hurting someone.
@@MrJohnCarrol
There were options he could have used that didn't breach the privacy of the gift. Can I forgive him for it? Yeah, without even thinking. But it was still among the worst options.
1. Correct
2. Correct
3. Correct
Bottle Night mentioned: 5 episodes (making its triumphant return to the pod! - one on patreon)
KILLS: 3 (one on Patreon)
see ya next time :)
The update of the third story reminds me of the episode of How I Met Your Mother, where the friends have annoying habits and the others only notice after they mention them
WOTC on time???
You love to see it.
The whole week I'm waiting for the Councel, but every Friday I entirwly forget about it and am surprised when I get the notif.
58:51 jordan went full remmy ratatouille with his impassioned speech there
i genuinely love this show a lot thank you mister bt
Kelly's not a slow eater, she's a no eater
As a slow eater I do not claim Kelly
Wow MBT is getting really good at reading these. Actually more correct each week
The whole gift pressure thing - either get over yourself and open them or just tell people you don't want gifts and would prefer X or Y.
holy hell, I’m not sure if this is the funniest thing i’ve ever heard or i have severe brain damage this point. fr tho you’re all independently so funny it’s wonderful having you play off each other.
Peeps outed as an IPA enjoyer, podcast is over
The Councel: slow eating is like +30 minutes
Kelly: hold my beer
I've already read the last post with friends, listening to the first segment now, I can't WAIT to hear about their takes on the update.
About the scond story, does she feel better if she doesn't receive anything? My first reaction to all this is that if you know she struggles with receiving and opening gifts, the correct thing to do is to give nothing.
As a slow eating mocker, I still think it was pretty assholish of the guy to see that he has the power of selection and promptly think "I can use this to install a time limit." I think this was always going to function more as a trap than as something that would actually help her eat faster.
Unfortunately, given the results I have to stand with him anyway.
I mean I don't really think that's a fair assessment. The dude already learned from the woman's husband that when they eat together he does have to sort of ignore her so that she can focus on eating. At least from what I'm getting here, that gave the dude this idea that she could be incentivized to eat quicker. You can't really just ignore her during a social outing, so that's not on the table, but going out to eat at a restaurant that clearly outlines a strict eating time limit? What better motivator to get chompin.
So at least from where I see the story, it didn't feel malicious, like I would have expected her to speed up as well.
There's acceptable slow eating, and there's spending 2 hours literally not eating and then having the audacity to complain about it. Time is just non-existent as a concept to Kelly
Sometimes you need to force your hand a lil. Now she's aware and needs to work on that aspect of herself.
@@ab2aasd I think her asking to go to a place that serves food if they are going out afterwards anyways is fine.... But you can't expect people to watch you eat all the way passed midnight like come on. Half an hour to an hour max, maybe a little more if everyone is still having a good time, but you gotta get your s*** together or take it home at that point.
The update wasn't about the first dinner though. He had gathered evidence (while keeping his wife updated) that it wasn't just him, then the wife agreed to let him arrange a test. The test was the timed BBQ.
This scenario (if real) is one of the few times a mundane complaint seems dumb, but digging deeper there is a REAL concern about it. Honestly my alarms went off when he described her as nibbling on everything. Even slow eaters I know don't do nibbles. They take a modest bite, maybe chew awhile, then talk for way longer. Actively eating slow like that is not normal as far as I've seen.
My will always seeks more of the councel
i'm gonna guess the issue with the second girl isn't the act of opening the gift itself but the anxiety of expectation.
After the demise of react court this filled the void of it the rumors where true .
So true... poor one out for one of the best segments NL ever had
Just as Joseph said, there are some things that people just need to get over, and if they can't do it by themselves then they need to get advice from either a trusted person or a professional to help them get over that thing.
Oh my god yes, i love will of the coucel
So today's theme is just a list of reasons why folks need to communicate their issues because those last 2 in particular can be summed up before the updates as "dude, could you just tell me why?"
Glad the second post ended up with a happy ending though.
In fairness, the 3rd post was well communicated, just needed the update to reveal he gathered evidence and everyone was on board with the process. One of the few times making a profile is reasonable; When your legit complaint sounds ridiculous. Can't really communicate your way out of that without recipes.
55:55 as a fast eater. Yeah just get on the beers 😂
edit: 6 hours?!?! nah man I aint watching you eat for 6 hours 😂😂
I love how 1st world country problems are "omg how am i ever going to react properly to this designer bag gift" while other people in other places be like "well i can either pay rent or eat wonder which one will i pick" lol
TOP FIVE COUNCEL EPISODE
"he hurt her feelings when he came over and played with the dog" He's 4 the fuck you talking about
Hah, going on about books getting into airports and I'm thinking like, I should mention If Books Could Kill, only for them to name drop it moments later. Good podcast that
#1 The parent is at fault and not for allowing the "divorce". The parent is at fault for not removing the dog from the situation before it became an issue. I respect that even a four year old can learn, however, they don't exactly have the background for these things. Remove the dog from the situation so the kids can play together, then tell the other kid's parents about the situation so they can handle it how they feel best.
Of note: I do not approve of forcing kids to play with someone they don't want to. I side with the boys on that. Same with how I am highly against forcing a kid to accept hugs and kisses from people (generally relatives) if they don't want to. Self autonomy is important, even as a kid.
#2 I appreciate where the lady is coming from. It is an Expensive gift. If she doesn't come from a rich family, such a gift would be super heavy weight on her. While to them, the gift isn't a big deal, we don't know how much the bag costs. There are bags that cost more than a car. Something like that can be quite heavy on a person. Not opening the gift is a mental thing where she can basically trick herself into thinking it doesn't exist until she does. Plus, we don't know if she has some form of mental health problem.
The parents are in the clear. However, the guy is a problem. He should not have opened it. He should have explained it to the parents better. He should have talked to her and gotten more out of her. No, the boyfriend wasn't "trying". He got the surface answer, shrugged his shoulders, and then went and took her agency away because it was the easy way out for him. He didn't ask if opening it for her would help, he just did it. You can totally call him the AH for that.
As for the lady and how she reacted. She needed to say something to the parents.
Oh, and therapy. She needs therapy and he needs to go to couples therapy. Talk it out. The boys talked about pushing too far, but sometimes you have to. This isn't going to go away. If she can't open up about this sort of thing with him, then they really need couples therapy. Oh, and getting a gift isn't always a "nice" thing. In this case it likely is, but gifts can be given maliciously. If you give a gift expecting something in return, it isn't a gift. You can feel disappointed about not getting a thank you, but you can not require it.
On the update: Holy moly! Every other day? The hell? How did the boys not catch that!
#3 Slow eating isn't a bad thing, but she managed to find the point where it crosses over to not eating.
"he has the physiognomy of someone who's very easy to bully" I mean you guys actually hang out with Gage a man who I'm convinced only achieves any satisfaction in his life by people being slightly mean to him so I guess your experts?
Also evidenced by him consistently taking the least defensive stances ever.
[Norman Rockwell painting]
IPA’s are good
Joseph: the problem is that this guy is making wild assumptions and jumping to conclusions about what his girlfriend wants
Peeps: so he should have tried to ask for more clarifications and try to find a solution she would be happy with?
Joseph: no
Joseph: He tried that, multiple times, and was constantly stone walled.
I've heard it floated around that Biden intentionally waited until the RNC was over before bowing out, and considering how throughly unprepared Republicans were for the announcement it would be hilarious if it were true.
He has been in the game nearly a century. There must be SOMETHING in that skull.
IPAs are top tier 😂
Okay about the whole gift girl parents thing, I think one possibility is there’s some kind of context with the girl and the parents. Maybe she has some kind of major issue with them, but knows it’s not something that can be solved so is just attempting to avoid them and the bf either doesn’t see that or doesn’t want to. Idk that’s just a vibe I get from this kind of irrationality. I feel like everybody is assuming they have a fine relationship but in reality plenty of people have horrible relationships with their partners parents. It’s sometimes literal irreconcilable differences that basically can’t be solved so the only thing to do is attempt to avoid them.
There’s not context that this is the case, just saying it is a possibility.
2nd one is annoying, he’s definitely not the jerk. After a full week it’s clear the girlfriend is not going to open it and just wants to put it off and not get over it and enabling that is rude, especially having to play defense for her in every social situation. At some point you have to be an adult and at least explain it to them yourself if not work towards getting over it.
As a Slow Eater myself, I get sad quite often when people complain about how slow I tend to eat things - to the point I spent over an hour to eat a shared pizza, for example. That may have probably caused enough harm for me that I now force myself to eat quickly and with less pauses, but then I get sick and feel like I'm about to throw up, even while eating the same amount as everyone else. I have constant reflux issues because of it, so when I "have to" eat in public, I tend to not eat that much or, if we're in a rush, I put a mask on so people don't see me with a nauseous expression.
Ok but there's slow eater and SLOW eater. Like the girl didn't eat a single thing in more than 2 hours. That's not slow eating. That's not eating at all.
With all do respect if you can not eat at a normal pace without getting stomach issues you should probably see a doctor.
Now considering it's nausea and reflux there is a very decent chance its you getting in your own head but either way probably good to check if their isn't a serious problem with your stomach.
All there is to it is everyone giving equal consideration to everyone. People should give you time to eat, slow eating is not a crime. If everyone is feeling the time pressure pack up the food and take it with you so you dont go hungry and not everyone feels they are waiting on one person. Most everywhere will let you pack food if you ask nowadays. If it is making you sick I agree with the other reply that is worth trying to talk to a doctor about if you haven't already. Especially something like a shared pizza that sounds like a nightmare.
At the end you can almost hear the sizzling and steam coming from Jordans brain trying to comprehend the person in question.
I'm a slow eater myself. I just like to take my time with good food. But this person stretches this to an extreme. I still think that OP was at least a bit of an ass for kind of putting a spotlight on this person. But jeez, you gotta have some self awareness at some point...don't make people wait for you (for an unreasonable amount of time)
Also, pro tip for other slow eaters: If the people you're with are already done while you still have like half your plate full...just ask for staff to pack it up. At least where I live I haven't come across a food place that doesn't do this. This way you don't have to stress, don't have to inconvenience others AND on top of all, you have something nice for dinner/ the next day.
In OP's defense though, it's a legit problem that was easily proven after a short amount of research. And his wife (and Kelly's husband) were kept updated as he went about proving it. And they supported him.
This is a rare situation where a shallow-sounding complaint, after research, reveals a possibly serious issue that needs attention. In basically any other scenario he'd be the a-hole. But with context (6 HOURS WHEN HUNGRY?!) nah, that dude had every reason to stonewall. He was a jerk about it at first, but like.....
Can’t believe we managed to prove god is real before the 30th episode…not only that now these 3 gentlemen can move on to play Redemption the card game.
It's crazy how wrong you are for the first one it's important that kids understand that it's important to play/interact with everyone, and not exclude someone or isolate someone else; also THEY'RE FOUR, it's not like it's high school these kids literally don't know much at all!
Ofc the daughter shouldn't be forced to stay in pretend marriage or always just play with him, but they need to be amicable and play all toghether. The only other important thing is to make sure that the other kid apologizes and it's all good.
Kids should learn first how to be social and try to get along with everyone, and then learn to set boundaries, ofc you can and should still explain what a boundary is but at that age it's much more important to play with everyone.
I don't think that the mom is an asshole, because her hearth was in the right place but I think, like the hosts, she doesn't understand how being social and inclusive is important to learn for little kids, a lot of bullies and mean kid start off because they never really learn how to ask for an apology and accept it
I have mixed feelings on the second story. I am definitely on Jordan's side here with there needed to be better communication on his part and he should've tried to talk to her about why this makes her feel stressed and uncomfortable to try and figure out how to be accommodating. Telling her about her parents have been asking/are concerned about her response/lack of response to the gift probably didnt help with the anxiety. I think hr could've communicated better too that to his parents by saying, "she has anxiety around opening gifts. Its not a you thing, this is with any kind of gift, its nothing personal". That could've alleviated some of their worries. Also opening the gift without the girlfriends permission isn't going to help things, its just honestly going to make the situation worse imo.
On the inverse, while anxiety can be extremely irrational and i really do feel for her, as i also have some irrational anxieties that i really can't explain, i do think there needs to be better communication on her part about this anxiety that she needs to work through. I think she needs to communicate to the people around her about how she feels about gifts. Maybe suggest not having s surprise element to it, maybe just like give the gift unwrap? I think it's something she needs to work on through therapy. I think its a little rude to wait that long to not open it, since it has been over a week, i would be more on her side if it was like a day or two. Overall, i think both, to a certain extent, are in the wrong a bit for this and both need to do a bit better with communication.
With the update, im glad the they were able to work through it and resolve the issue with no huge problems and that they both have a better understanding of each other. They both acknowledged their faults and are moving forward. Good update
LETS GO CHICAGO MENTIONED
just lie to your parents and say she loves it, then everyone is happy.
For the third story: 100000% kelly's parents punished her if she ate quickly as a child. There is literally no other explanation.
Not really. The fact that it's not a problem when nobody talks to her and her comments about the BBQ place not being 2 hours suggests pretty major time blindness.
That combined with not seeming to have a all that strong hunger drive suggests some sort of neurological condition.
These are both symptoms of ADHD but I have yet to meet a fellow ADHDer that doesn't shove food in their face at mach 3.
@jellewijckmans4836
It's possible she was homeschooled or similarly sheltered, in a way that enabled her to eat a meal for an entire day. Like, as a "wait I'm hungry?" ADHDer myself, my vacuum came from lunch being 15 minutes up until high school. If I had the opportunity to eat slow, I probably be a slow eater today.
In the first story you guys kind of ignore that she could have just played with the dog together with him.
This combined with the constantly asking this other kid to marry her until he relents does suggest a level of entitlement both the mom and you gloss over.
Now they are 4 it's not weird for them to be entitled little shits. It's a defining feature of being a toddler but doesn't mean it shouldn't be addressed.
Also best for her to learn that she like anyone will always lose to a dog.
for the slow eating story, she was for sure being really excessive with the slow eating, but the story started feeling like bullying her after the update, it just made me feel really bad.
Eating that slowly is just incompatible with most food based socialisation to be fair. Even if it's not some moral failing, she needs to be self aware enough to work around it rather than insisting others bend to her needs.
@@davidragon1 like I said, what she was doing was insane, but I feel like tricking her into a situation where she had to confront her slow eating is like, so unnecessary and then the way they talked to her afterwards? this woman must be impossibly stubborn to warrant that kind of response.
@@thebluehollow It's kind of about how we're framing the situation. He engineered a situation in which she would have limited (still 2 hours) time to eat. I don't think that's deceitful necessarily or "tricking her" unless they sprung it on her last minute. She is informed of the time limit ahead of the meal. Again, this seems like she is lacking self awareness and/or time awareness. The comments after the meal may have been somewhat confrontational, but it's clearly a situation that was going to create issues in the near future and needed to be thought about. 2 hours for dinner I don't think is a "malicious set up".
@@davidragon1 yeah I can’t argue with that. the fact that she just acted like she had no idea about the time despite being told by the servers is pretty damning
@@thebluehollow
Also that (as far as I could tell) OP was planning this with his wife and Kelly's husband as a stress test. And after the proof was revealed(in alarming fashion at that) he basically exposed a real issue they need to address ASAP.
Week 29 without a George Santos guest appearance
Serious answer to a (I hope) not serious question at the beginning. There is a logically consistent reason to wish Trump well, but still think he's evil: it's called "Murder is wrong, always"
So about the bag one. I understand, I think, because I get extreme anxiety when opening or responding to texts or emails. I will wait a week or sometimes even a month before doing it because I'm scared. I'm scared because things might be bad. I don't like it and have asked people to check for me before. It makes me feel really bad and uncomfortable. The BF could have attempted to explain the situation of how their parents feel and talk to her about it instead of literally doing the thing she didn't want to do without asking her and thinking he's going to solve it with this passive-aggressive-esque placement of where the would see it. He did that because he didnt want to deal with his parents or explain things. She literally did nothing wrong. If I gave someone a gift and they felt this way I'd be like "ok". I realize boomers don't think this way and are a lot of the time stuck in their ways but they are OLD who CARES. Really though the guy is 100% the asshole, the parents don't understand, she feels anxious and bad probably, and NOBODY IS COMMUNICATING WITH ANYONE. I've posted this here before but 99% of these situations could be solved by just communicating with other people. It is not rude to not thank someone for a gift, they didn't ask for it and being upset that someone doesn't respond how you expect them to is rude. I don't say thank you to people often because I feel like they don't actually care. Clearly, she, like myself probably doesn't think normally and I hate situations where people just assume this, the person is normal and exactly like you. It would not be hard in this situation to be patient, instead people pushed her until she got upset and felt even worse. The gift will be opened eventually. Messages will be responded to eventually. Things are okay, and people need to make better assumptions and communicate more.
This before voting and the update:
The girlfriend not send any thank you message is rude for sure. However, the guy is an asshole for opening the gift. The main issue is that he believes he's solving the problem, maybe through inferences of what the problem is or as a good gesture, but he's taken all the agency away from her while she has solution and it's time and comfortability. He isn't acknowledging her feelings about it nor trusting that she will be able to handle them. He doesn't need to understand them to stand by them and relay that to his parents. Him just saying "Hey, she hasn't opened it yet, she wants to open it at her own time and I'll let you know when she does" and leave it at that. If they have questions, they can have a discussion after she opens it when the pressure is off her
Gonna have to disagree with the guy "not having to understand" part. Like, this could have all been prevented if the gf simply explained why she doesn't feel comfortable opening the gift. That was all that was needed. Also you comment about he was taking away the gf's agency, but at some point when someone keeps pushing and delaying something you either have to give them more forceful nudges or just do it for them, and it should be your fault for having to do either one.
The guy is not the AH imo. No matter what he does he is going to make someone upset, and he simply picked the path that would make the least amount of people upset.
@@obiesenpai3869If this was something more time sensitive, I would be more inclined to agree but that wasn't the case. The bf had pressure from his parents, as well as excitement for her reaction, but instead of standing behind his gf's choice, he elected to just do it to get it over with.
I'm not gonna speculate what may have happened if things happened differently, since it did work out, but for me, trusting my partner's feelings and actions will always come before my need to do something "for their sake"
I'm gonna be bold, go against the 2-1, and agree with Peeps here. I do think that opening the gift for her, especially without asking, was an asshole move.
Now, I'm not unsympathetic to the guy's position, and I do think the girl was also a bit of an asshole here, even if I very deeply identify with the experience of getting all caught up in my fucked-up anxious brain about something that's really easy to fix, but this isn't a zero sum game.
Ultimately, it was a pretty minor asshole move, and he certainly had the best of intentions in doing so, but it really comes down to this: if you do an asshole thing out of the sincere belief that you are doing a kindness, that doesn't change the fact that you did an asshole thing! Admittedly, it absolutely makes him much less of an asshole that he was doing it out of a sincere desire to help, rather than as an attempt to be, like passive-aggressive or whatever, but the fact of the matter is that I believe that both the intent AND the results matter, and fundamentally, the result was that she felt hurt by him going over her head and opening the gift.
Thankfully, both of them sat down and apologized to eachother for their respective screw-ups and actually communicated, but I think this is a classic, if very minor, example of what the ESH rating is for on the subreddit. Both of them did a fucky wucky, and thankfully it worked out in the end.
Man; Is seggually uncomfortable about girlfriend eating cheese balls
Women; is upset about a birthday present
“Aw the poor women baby she’s so uncomfy :(((“
The cheeseball problem is the man is cucking himself for some reason and clearly has some sexual hangups to workpast. Gifts are maybe twice a year and the gf could just solve it all by saying she doesnt like gifts and asking for none from now on
all three of them say she’s also an asshole what are you crying about
What do you mean you couldn't vote for biden, peeps. What's your other choice, dude? The fact you were anything other than "Im voting against Trump no matter what" is cringe
What a good episode, I think Joseph on story 2 has gotta be top 3 shittiest Councel opinions of all time. She just doesn't like gifts, she doesn't appreciate them the same way other people do. She has trouble expressing that, but why does she really have to do so in depth? What justification would she need to give to simply not have that as part of her love language? Why is it something she has to "get over?" She is kind of an asshole for not clarifying what she does or does not like with others close to her, but the guy forcing this form of appreciation on her that she clearly does not like is massive asshole behavior. It's a breach of trust and respect. The guy should have absolutely done a better job trying to understand better, and if she keeps being kinda shitty about it then she is more of an asshole.
Also just another classic gaslighting episode. All of her friends know that opening gifts make her uncomfortable. She did send a thank you to the parents after receiving the package. She did say that the texts were making her uncomfortable. The parents asked if they were making her uncomfortable, and she already said yes to that, the dude doesn't even say how he responded to the parents question. She later clarifies post-opening that she felt awkward because she thought it was the bag and knew it was so expensive. She DOES communicate, albeit not as strongly as she could've, but again, how much does she need to say to justify her feelings?
So like you guys are the echoest echo chamber to ever echo
You just don't open someone else's gift, that's Republican behavior
16:14 to skip past the cringe political discussion to actual good topics.
why are you watching?
@@XXPanzyBoyXXfor the 3 topics. Those are actually enjoyable.
we're three hot guys, of course we're sharing our opinions