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8 Signs of An Abusive Parent
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- Опубликовано: 1 дек 2020
- Do you struggle with emotional abuse in your family? Do you have abusive parents? It’s a really hard question to answer. No one wants to think their parents are abusive, but many parents are. Hundreds of thousands of kids around the world struggle with familial abuse every year. The problem is... most kids don’t know what abuse actually looks like. In the video, let's look at the signs that your parents are not treating you the way they should, to help you understand the markers of emotional abuse and mental abuse. If you relate to this video and want to learn about how to deal with abusive parents, we've made a video on this for you too: • 7 Ways To Deal With Ab...
#psych2go #parents
Credits:
Writer: Tristian Reed
Script Manager: Kelly Soong
VO: Amanda Silvera
Animator: Anthony Plantyn
RUclips Manager: Cindy Cheong
References:
Felitti, V. J. et al. (1998). Relationship of Childhood Abuse and Household Dysfunction to Many of the Leading Causes of Death in Adults. American Journal of Preventive Medicine, 14(4): 245-258
Brown, D. W. et al. (2009). Adverse Childhood Experiences and the Risk of Premature Mortality. American Journal of Preventive Medicine, 37(5): 389-396.
McCauley, J. et al. (1997). Clinical Characteristics of Women with a History of Childhood Abuse: Unhealed Wounds. The Journal of the American Medical Association, 277(17): 1362-1368.
U.S. Department of Health & Human Services (2018). Child Maltreatment 2018.
Child Abuse
Childhelp®
Phone: 800.4.A.CHILD (800.422.4453)
People They Help: Child abuse victims, parents, concerned individuals
Family Violence
National Domestic Violence Hotline
Phone: 800.799.SAFE (800.799.7233)
TTY: 800.787.3224
Video Phone Only for Deaf Callers: 206.518.9361
People They Help: Children, parents, friends, offenders
We released another video on this today here: • 8 Signs of An Abusive ...
Interested in animating for us? Reach out to editorial@psych2go.net
We lied. We uploaded 3 videos for you in one day. Enjoy!
ruclips.net/video/_ZFFZpKO0l0/видео.html DISCLAIMER: This video is for education purposes and create awareness this topic. If you don't feel comfortable watching this video or find that you need some help. Please seek out to a profession/therapist.
Nice! Thank you
Thx you
Thank you
Thankyou⊂(◉‿◉)つ
Thank you ❤️
I really can't stand the fact that parents give birth to their children, when they are not able to take good care of them.
A message to all abusive parents:
Your child's mental health is more important than their grades.
Wow, yeah... Mental health is WAY more important. Idk if you're a minor currently but I mean, that's some truth right there. I grew up with those expectations and I'm 26 now. Started as soon as I started going to school haha. I'm working on not RESENTING my shitty parents for that among other things. Lol it gets easier the more I build myself up tho.
Parents only care about grades because they want you to get a job and shit later. But the thing is, it's really hard to get and keep a job if you're depressed as fuck or struggling with your mental health in another way, could be anxiety. Whatever it is, you're doing your future self a HUGE favor the more you allow yourself to start the journey of discovering yourself and how to regulate your own difficult emotions.
Speaking from experience, it wasn't until I cut myself off energetically speaking from their BS expectations of me (expectations that were disconnected from the truth of who I am) and started prioritizing my own mental health (which they weren't capable of doing) that I started to really see life open up for me in those "outwards" ways...
For me I found regulating looks outwardly 'crazy' to most people haha. Sometimes I need to scream. Jog. Break things. Safely, of course...
I didn't separate myself physically, I was still living with my abusive mom but yeah, I grey rocked her for over a year and she slowly stopped expecting me to be all happy and fake around her. Landed my dream job at the same age that she was when she got her first "real" job. But I'm way ahead of her as far as emotional maturity goes.
When I look back on my life, I never regretted what I invested in myself. I did end up regretting sacrificing myself and my values for other people who had nothing or very little to give in return. Bet on yourself. It's not gonna be a guarantee other people will be there for you but if you can be there for yourself? Fucking golden.
You got this, whoever is reading this. You got this.
EDIT: Update, y’all! I moved out and am investing in revamping an old trailer to live in 😊🙏💗 The place I’m at is going through a housing crisis so thought I’d be the change I want to see in the world. Thanks for the likes! 😃🤙
@harits fadhilah omg so true
Thank you.
I mean there's such thing as a c section.....😏😏JKKJKJK on a serious note very true.
@@Compunctious_me yeah if I fail gym I won’t be able to zoom with my friends and my iPad will get taken away
“Every children deserves a parent but not every parent deserves a child”
“There is no what if to loving and supporting ur child”
Earned a Like and a well-respected, "Agreed".
that's true my parents just don't deserve me
that is soo true
Yeah
@yourlocalanimefan I'm not trying to get attention, but my story is exactly same.. I only told my friend a few days ago... I hope your friend is feeling better :D
One lie I was told as a kid was, "If you report this to the police, you will be taken away, put in foster care and someone else far worse will hurt you even more." I still wonder what my life would have been like if I had called the police to report the abuse.
Really? I still believe it.. would life really be better if I reported my dad? I'm scared to go to court, etc.
@@kpopstanner4978 trust me. One regret I have is that I didn’t confront him earlier in life. Waiting is just mean you have more emotional baggage to deal with in the future. I highly recommend reading the book Boundaries by Dr Cloud and Dr Townsend.
@@user-pj4gp1cj2o yes. it is.
@@user-pj4gp1cj2o That is abuse. No person should ever be treated like that. Is there somewhere safe you can go? Look into an organization like CARDV, (Center Against Rape and Domestic Violence) in your area and ask them for help.
@@user-pj4gp1cj2o It sounds like abuse. Call someone for help.
It’s not just young children, it’s the same for adult children too.
Exactly, I'm 22 here in Nigeria and I ain't tolerating that shit anymore!
I'm an adult and must respected as one or else you take whatever you see!
21 here from Romania 😢@@okoroifeanyichukwu8762
Governments: child abuse is illegal
Parents: imma pretend I didn't heard and saw that.
What’s sad is that the government doesn’t even do anything about it (in Australia anyway)
@@tired.5123 that's terrible 😔
Fr
@@tired.5123 same goes with my country
In my place the government doesn't care abt child abuse lmao 🙃
“Parents should love and support their kids no matter what.” this made me cry
What how
My dad want me to be a doctor when I grow up I don't know if it's right or wrong but he always scold me for opening a RUclips channel it was my dream to be a youtuber guess I have to be a doctor...
You're not alone .☹️
This says the comment was posted one month ago but it says the video was posted 20 minutes ago🤔💀
@@Inyourmom77 oh my gooooddd and one comment was 3 weeks ago what the hell is going on
As being a 13 year old in the UK, I've been called many horrible names by my parents, I've been shouted at and blamed for things I've never done. I've been bruised, scratched and hurt. Making me even scared to leave my room to get something to eat or drink. I cry in my room for hours and hours not knowing what to do
I relate to you both of my parents are abusive first off my mom drinks a lot (good thing she doesn't drink anymore) whenever I would tell her to stop drinking she would slap my face and leaves the house every month she takes my baby brothers and ttakes them to the party (there are usually bad people there) so I get worried because I want to know if the babies are ok whenever she wants to come home my dad forces me to call her and he said he would slap me if I don't my dad gives me bruises and whenever my mom isn't drunk she is nice to me And my mom hits my baby brothers Edit: I told my dad to stop being rude and he said: stop being an idiot
@@Opticalillusions870
I get it, my mum and dad are an alcoholic and still is to this day
I have had an alcoholic father so I feel you and I can relate to what you're going through. If you need someone to talk to we are here for you ❤
Just remember it’s not you, it’s your parents. They’re screwing up and it’s not right. You have every right to be upset at them because they aren’t always going what they should. YOU have a correct sense of right and wrong. Don’t let them make you feel crazy. I know I’m kind of saying generic things that maybe other people have said to you before but I really want you to understand. I know how it feels and you do deserve to be treated well.
I will leave the house
I was literally crying watching this video because I didn't know I was being emotionally abused and it just hurts me that I don't have a friendly relationship with my parents and I envy those who have 😢
Gurll i am a 12 yr old and I have been abused since I was 9 and they say contact someone bitch I can't
Me too I Just realized I was physically and emotionally abused
Me too and I'm not even in middle school yet. I don't know what to do but I hope everything will turn out fine.
Me too I was crying so hard that's why I want to leave as soon as I get a job and cut every single connect with my dad
Oh no!! Are you okay? 👌
"Your child's mental health is far more important than their grades" Say that to my mom.
edit; ya'll need therapy or sum wtf,to anybody who has family problems,come to me i'm your new mom
Ikr
I hav almost half the stuffs listed here in my family
But whats weird is i dont feel like calling hotline or anything coz...
1. I feel like my problems r small ...
2. Im 18 years old and have been dealing with this since 9 years old..
Right, parents are also humans not supercomputers that whatever they think or doing is the best, even it's ruining their life. Pressurizing kids can cause counter effects than any good
When I was in primary school, my grades were horrible and my parents used my grade as the reason for abusing me. But later when I went to secondary, my grades improved so much that I ranked 1st every single year at school and eventually got in one of the top 50 universities in the world. But even when my grades improved, it never stop them from abusing me both emotionally and physically. They just used another reason for abusing me. My original plan was to get a PhD placement after my graduation but this pandemic just force me to live with my parents for an extra year
My dad, he always yells when I don’t understand something I’ve gotten one C In my whole life when online school started and my teacher barley told us what to do last year and they were so Mad about it that’s why I now am upset if I even get a 80 percent
I envy those parents and children who has a friendly relationship between them. My mother literally won't talk unless I have to do something or there's a visitor.
Same
Same
Same, she even said to me than she wasn't there to be my friend, that she was there to educate me and nothing else. Even if that meant I would fear her or hate her now or in the future.
+
Same. My cousins always tell me how they play games with their parents and could talk to them about anything. I wish I could just be happy for them, but I always feel a strand of jealousy in my heart.
The abuse started at 4 years old and went on for 7-8 years 🙂 my inside is screaming "LET ME OUT!" and crying shouting for help but no one notices and because my outside looks all "perfect" and "happy" but no one knows the truth.
Me too 😢 I am actually the happy and crazy one in my friends group but they don’t see my other side which I wish they can see
I'm a 18 year old girl and three days back my father beated me ..he threw me out of the bed by grabbing my leg ..he grabbed my hair and dragged me across the room then he tried to strangle me and pointed a knife at me ...that was very traumatizing and forever will be
Girl, My advice is just run away or just complain Child survices, that's horrible, ur dad is a spawn of satan ( sorry, if u feel bad) ur dad about to kill u, btw, What did u do that makes him so angry?
May God help you with these problems and heal you. Praying for evrybody in these types of situations! 🙏🏼
Are you okay????
An idiot will now say you should just forgive and ignore this shit in the future because your parents trained you in school and fed you , bullshit!
Report your father he is a monster is person!!!
As a Mexican child, I can say most of us have abusive parents, but since it's "normal" to abuse your kid here, most people don't do anything when they see abuse
This is so messed up. I'm always deeply concerned when Mexicans talk casually about being beaten or having specific objects thrown at them and then not call it "abuse". Like...wow
abuse is different from your parent hitting u or something. my dad is mexican and he did abuse my sisters. it wasn't ok. i think people sometimes don't realize the difference between culture and just abuse
(and I agree with u)
@@name9039 there is no excuse. Zero. Culture doesn't matter. Should still be treated as abuse even if most people do it.
I am not Mexican and I can relate
my dad :
"you’re so incompetent"
"you’re so lazy"
"why are you like that"
"one day im gonna leave this house"
*why did you even have kids* ?
True
Like I wonder is this the way parents treat their children, like just because some kids are raised like this doesn't me we should. We are not dolls for you to play with.
"One day I'm gonna die and- "
And what? I hate this phrase
The first two lines, my dad tells me every day. My dad can't even realise the only reason I wake up late is that I struggle to fall asleep every night because his words and actions fill my head up until they clog my brain and now I can't even fall asleep until two-three in the morning 😒
i dont want to be that guy, but accidental birth?
I am coming to the slow realization that my father was mentally and emotionally abusive growing up.
What hurts most is that I still love him and I feel guilty for that. --- Thank you so much for this video!!
Same
That is pretty much attachment...
Same
Same
I have come to hate my father for the abuse he inflicted on me when I was a child. And I wasn’t even a boisterous or unruly child, but quiet, introverted, and terribly lonely. I never loved him, I feared him, and now I just despise him.
I really appreciate the fact that you included verbal abuse here as someone who has always been very sensitive and emotional I can totally relate with emotional abuse
Are you also hughly sensitive? My parents destroyed me emotionally
I have a question I’m 12 but I think my mom is abusive she is a single mom my dad was abusive and he left me but sometimes I make small mistake and I get hit with a broom sometimes it breaks she thrown a spoon at me slapped me more than 20 or more I get verbally abused and threatened sometimes But she still loves me
@@Nwarmp hate to break it to you but yes, she is still abusive
Im a chinese. My parents say: “Its just our culture”
If its our culture then I dont want to be apart of my culture.
R u ok? Do you need to vent?
@@lamarasawyer850 Thank you for asking :) Im fine atm, but thanks for asking, ur very sweet.
Yeah that type of culture is hella toxic. Cut off all ties with them if you can. Proud if you ♥️
@@Beanssss_ thank you ❤️❤️
Ill try my best when I become financially stable etc etc and turn 18
@@deckmanbestie9772 i already am 18 n still in control of my fam...
My culture is the same too (India) n i wanna move out too
I'm here after getting verbally abused, emotionally abused and physically abused, cried for hours and now finding my comfort. This happens almost every day
My Aayush clan, I find myself here as well. For me it's been years ago, although the feels are present like it's happening right now. It's extremely awful, it debilitates my life. Please seek help now. Wish you much healing and a loving happy care free life 🌌💖💫
Same here too
Same here..😪
Experienced same thing.. I spent most of night in tears.. hoping one day everything will be alright.. but no it never stopped.. n this has affected me while growing
Yeah and then they wonder "why are they saaaaaad"
*mmm I wonder*
Abuse is bad enough, but the really tough thing was the randomness of it. It’s one thing to get hit for being bad, but it’s terrifying when it just happens for NO reason. That’s fucked me up for life.
same here i would be playing Minecraft on a friday night, with classmates i was already not good friends with because the fked up things i would get punished for i didn't even do, or someone made a half truth and i got in trouble, granted i did some bad things but i wasn't in control it was like my parents hijaked my brain and did their evil through me.. anyhow i got slapped in the back of the neck full force by my dad as i was just trying to be with the guys and play something
.. i still can't process why he did that.. says distractions are only a waste of time.. and leaves 2 weeks for work, then the other 2 is mental hospital at home with narcissistic manipulation sprinkled in.
Even when being bad, children should NEVER be hit. If a parent can't parent without hitting you, they're lazy, unbothered or lack self-control or emotional control. All signs of a parent who isn't fit to parent.
This is my mother! She’s always been loving and caring, I could go to her for comfort. But back in 2019 I got really sick (I suffer from multiple chronic illnesses) I couldn’t do anything to stop this new sickness, so I lost my job and had to sell my house & move back in with my parents. My mom (and dad) sat in my living room crying as I told them my situation. She was so nice & told me that she’d take care of me, etc. 2 months after I moved in here, I had a bad flare of back pain and was in pain for 4 days so I broke down and went to the ER. I was released (on a Sunday) and was really weak but the pain was feeling better. The next morning my mother woke me up screaming at me (just like she did when we were packing up the last of my things; I asked her to not treat me like a child (she told me not to pack the refrigerator stuff with non refrigerator) that lead to an on slot of screaming, swearing and saying very hurtful things to me) but back to the ‘incident’ She was screaming at me that she was going to move in with her sister because she is tired of me saying my sick and just laying in bed. And about calling my neuro doctor. We yelled back & forth and I just kept asking to be left alone. I don’t think she heard a word I said cause she snapped & started throwing punches & kicks, I didn’t hit her back, I just tried blocking the punches & kicks. So then she decided to choke me, it was like it was happening in slow motion cause I work in LE and know how to get out of this but I don’t want to hurt her. So I yelled as best as I could for my dad, he came in and got her off of me and she says to him “don’t you dare take her side” he said he’s not taking sides you shouldn’t be hitting her. She left the house to her sisters but eventually came back; but no apologies, not for the time in the car and now this! I have no idea what that whole “taking sides” thing is about though. We were beat as kids but nothing crazy, smacked in the mouth or on your behind. But not abuse, like she’s doing to me now. On December 17th 2019 is the day I lost the mother I knew as a kid, cause this woman is a stranger to me, all her anger is taken out on me-everything bad is blamed on me. There’s days I wish I called 911 that day she choked me but I kept saying I can’t watch my mother be arrested, yet I know that if she did she could be forced to take mental health treatment 🤷♀️
"IM GONNA HIT YOU"
"STOP CRYING OR I WILL HIT YOU"
"Why won't you talk to me?"
exactly
my dad ...
True..
Sameeee thing
Bro your pfp is funny lmao
whenever my parents hit me and my siblings they always say, "I'm just teaching you a lesson" or "you where being a brat, you deserved it". But then when my sister hits another sibling and says "its because they where being annoying" she gets yelled at and hit again. Our parents are so hypocritical.
Its gotten to the point where I don't feel safe here, like if anything goes wrong I'll start to freak out. I absolutely hate it here, its not a suitable living situation either, I live in a camper and at my grandmothers house, where I'm scared that my family will hurt me. I don't like it here at all.
@@jojomania9601 Hey, I hope you are doing okay ;(
Forget the hipocricy! Child beating is not okay!
@@lukaurbankitek6019 Thats true and if the parent is black or Asian or Mexican everyone thinks it’s normal cuz it’s their culture-
@@Isabel-sr8ep No cap. Totally agree
"they love u when u do what TEY lovea nd when u do anything you love , that love disappears" idk why but that made me cry
My dad has always had anger issues, and he has often attacked me with verbal abuse and personal attacks. Like saying: "Your autism isn't an excuse for bad behavior" or: "I know you're sad I sold your cottage, but...". He's even said: "I'm your parent, I'm allowed to educate you by telling when you stink". I don't see him as much anymore, but these remarks still hurt to this day.
As a 32 year old man just figuring his past out, my heart goes out to anyone this has affected.
I think I am affected and just recently too my dad told me I am a pour reflection of him just for the simple reason I didn’t want to shave my beard before school yet he doesn’t shave his receding hairline and goes to work with it evreyday ik this might sound funny but it’s the genuine hypocrisy that’s grinding my gears
Definitely me! and I struggle everyday with this in my life as a 32 year old right now and the pain is still there.
I didn’t know until I was informed at 19, my entire family is abusive and it goes back generations. Now at nearly 24 I’m still stuck with my mother.
):
Thanks. My mom always yells!
im ten.
I don’t even feel safe in my own house, I’m literally terrified, especially when my dad comes home from work.. But it’s ok, in three years I’ll be able to leave, I can do this, we all can do this.
I send a hug to everyone
Update 12/6: I hate my parents they took away my kitty and the only things that made me happy, My kitty was the only one who gave me love in this house
Update 17/6: I’ve got my kitty back! :) and I passed this school year, so now they’re a more calm since I’ve got good grades
21:12: my dad is mad at me I’m hiding in the bathroom I’m scared I hope he doesn’t come and yell at me
04/07/21: I’m doing good everyone is pretty chill :)
Get help!! You dont have to deal with an abusive person. I am sending you hugs💓💓⚘🧚♀️
Stay strong
Damn....I feel that 🫂
I get to leave in 8more years I’m 10 now i want to leave now.
You have it good,I am 10 and I have no idea when the abusing started🤨😐???!!!
I spent 2 years homeless, while crippled, unable to even walk, because my parents were so horrible to me. They would mock me for trying to get disability and say only "pieces of S***" get that etc. I left with no help from anyone, no money , no contacts
(I had been crippled for years by then), and though I for sure struggled, I was much happier and actually got things in motion to benefit my life. Cut the horrible people out of your life you will be better off, this is coming from someone who's extremely limited by being physically crippled, if you can live without the person abusing you, then you would be better off without them and that's the truth.
Having been through this from both parents, there is one thing I know and that is that I would be a wonderful parent one day, the one I never had :) Verbal abuse along with neglect with no affection other than hate made me very insecure person and it took awhile to be confident in myself...
I'm just a toy to my parents . When ever they are angry,they just come and hit me and release their anger
@¿Ťhe_Řoyals? oh
When i told to my mom that i thought i was lesbian bc my most crushes was girls she hitted me with a dumbbell just bc i thought.....today i was with my friends one of my friends called jane when jane leaved i didn't know that i need to leave after her my mom come to the park when whe were we get home and she starts to hit me and saying that if i do that again she will cut off ally friendships.....i got scared every day that im gonna do something that i didn't know it was wrong.I don't wanna lose my friends i accidentally did that and i didn't mean it...she is saying that she wants to protect me from things but she hurt me with her words....i wanna live with my grandmother bc when i do something wrong she comfort me and not hurt me with words but i can't say i don't love my mom i kinda love her she is just scared to loose me but shs can just comfort me and not hurting me with her hursh words....
@@bungeetsubasa3139 it's ur life mate u must live it freely. What ever u like u can do. Just have hopes and trust bc one day u gonna have everything. :)
Ur not the only one sad dude the whole youth is suffering. Ngl I've don't so many suicidal atteemts but nothing worked.. I think it's not the time for me to die. And I believe too that one day everything is gonna change
@Jennie Ruby I just pray for permanent sleep
@Jennie Ruby tqsm.. I don't even think I deserve any happiness
when your parents are abusive but then your like:
*hey wait. thats illegal*
Ikr
No in my shitty country
Fr
And then you can’t do or say anything bc then you’ll get taken your parents away or worde
@@Apple-mm9ml when you can't do or say anything because your dependant on your parents but got a job and are gonna save up to leave :)
My parents never change. It doesn’t matter how old I am 😢
Same girl you're not alone
Just got beaten up
I'm 20
I've scars all over my body
@@R-rr1🥺💔
Really, how old are you now?
Do they still beat you?
@@R-rr1 wtf! How old ?
@@okoroifeanyichukwu8762 they may be 21 years old now
The verbal abuse and withholding love were always an issue in my relationship with my mother. I could be in class and miss her phone call and shed take it as a personal insult and get everyone else food but me. She'd tell me I'm not as smart as I think I am and often offer something in my time of need and hold it over my head. If you suffer from an abusive parent, get as far away as possible as soon as possible.
Having abusive parents taught me how not be a bad person. If you've gone through a rough time, my heart goes out to you. Love and ✌
As a person who lives with a ab*Sive parent,thank you and I do the same others as they went on this
Thanks ☺️
Having abusive parents isn't good for me.. they just hurt me for the sake of enjoyment and because my siblings tell lies about me. I've been abused ever since I was 2 and I'm almost 14. I have rarely done bad things to deserve abuse. I'm glad your OK now though :)
Thanks 🙏🏾
Having an abusive mom taught me that I wanna die 😄
My mother "refuses" to accept the title of an abuser.
then she's even more of an abuser
SAME
same
Same 😔
@Daniel Kluk basically yes, she doesnt act as much of a mother figure and constantly is yelling and/or threatening to "beat our asses" or "give us a reason to cry." She also doesn't feed us, I've had to make my own dinners since I was 7 ish and I mostly do all the stuff a mother normaly does for her child.
And my older sister has called her out for being abusive but she flat out said she "doesnt accept that because she would NEVER hurt her children who she ALWAYS takes care of."
At 40, I finally realized how my father's mental and emotional abuse fit so much of what is in this video. It amazes me how much I was able to compartmentalize and think was okay. Lots to unpack here
Perhaps the hardest part about abusive parents is that they don't realise that they are abusive in the first place.
“It’s all your fault!”
“I hate you!”
“You disgust me.”
As a child growing up I was scared to even speak. My grandmother lost her temper so often that I would just stay in my room. To this day I am still scared to talk to anyone because I am scared of them yelling at me or getting mad.
nobody in my family would agree with me so im alone i feel ya
Same with me
exact problem of how I had
@Kamiya Frazier Yes, yes I do.
My mom is the same, i feel ya girl
Having these type of parents is bad, I would hug every kid who has these types of parents
If you're an adult that can mark you as a pedophile.
@@Coincollector81 what does that mean bro
Thank you so much
@@priyadharasini1102 Hugging children.
guess i have a hug today
Thank you for talking this out. I've had this also with my father. He had most of these (except physical abuse). I've been viewing your channel for a while now and felt how much my father had on each one of them. Once, I had to do most of the work in the house (clean the dining room, dishwasher stuff, counter wiping, etc.). My father used to smoke, but moved on to vaping. He's done this ever since I was about 7 years old, and i'm still dealing with depression today (yes, I saw your other video). I hope you get a response to me, but I might not, since i'm basically in my Pre-Teen stage (I guess that's pretty early for a situation like that) Thank you.
This made me cry so hard because this just confirms my concerns: my mum is abusive. Just before I watched this me and my mum had a huge argument I’m not going to give to details but she false accused me a hit me twice. She keeps saying I’m a bully and that I’m abusive and it’s not true. She wouldn’t leave me alone until I literally screamed and yelled for her to go away. She always says that I’m so rude and I’m really not, my mum went completely out of control as she usually does and was saying all these terrible things about me. I didn’t listen but I fear what I would have heard if I had. The terrible thing is, is that I have nowhere to go… my dad lives far away and is also abusing. What’s worse is that my mum said that it’s over between me and her and I can go live on the streets or get adopted and I fear she really meant this. Btw this all happened because I said four words and she completely overreacted. Idk why I shared this but I did.
When I dissapoint them: "You're worse than I imagined the worst in having kids"
When I make them proud: "You know that you got to be the child we always wanted"
Mood.
Luckily, I do whatever I can to not disappoint them. But the few times I have, especially the bad times, they've said I disgust them.
@@GlaceonStudios I'm so sorry that you're still going throught this (as I took it out of your comment)
@@Eixart-s9w And later on complaining that SOMEONE raised you to only doing things for rewards lmao
It's called selfishness
Narcissist alarm.
At some point, you’ve been abused for so long, it doesn’t seem so bad after a while. You learn to live within the environment and develop survival skills that help you get by. My mother exudes all of these traits. I guess because abused (whether physical or emotional) has been normalized for so long, it doesn’t really bother me that I am abused anymore. I’ll live
Bless you🦋🦋🦋..
I can feel you and your every word cause I've gone through the same.
What if theyw ere really good for a long while, but then, suddently ebcame emotionally abusive?
what’s even worse is when you’re so accustomed to that environment of abuse and toxicity that any other environment that doesn’t involve those things makes you anxious af, because it’s unpredictable and scary, you’re not familiar with that environment like the one you’ve known how to navigate for years.
and even worse worse, is when you sabotage that healthy environment by causing some form of chaos or disruption between or with the people in that new environment because *thats* what you know how to deal with, it’s familiar.
@@thesaddestdude3575 …in the words of my therapist “they’ve been abusive your whole life, its only now that you’ve become aware of it”
I only just realised how "abusive" my mum can be... she's not too bad but when it's in the moment, it's kinda terrifying and upsetting. She would threaten go leave us, she says that we are stupid sometimes, she companies us to other people and sometimes gets physical, she ignores us if she is on facebook or talking to someone on the phone, or anything else and then blames us for anything that happens. But yeh your right you end up just learning to deal with it and it becomes normal. I now get very stressed in any situation involving arguments or shouting and I break. Start crying and panic. But it's very hard to accept that your parents are abusive, especially when you love them even though they are abusive.
Sometimes in my reflection I really wonder if I'm over reacting by I don't know how my mother is able to bring this level of anger out of me when no one else could
I have been abused a lot in my life, this is a life changer, it doesn’t change life, but it calms me down and teaches me about abuse and others.
Parents : *BASICALLY TELLS ME I AM SHIT BY COMPARING ME WITH OTHERS*
Me : Becomes suicidal
Parents : YoU HavE No RiGhtS to Die
Parents are so wierd
Oh my god dis fricking comment section gets me more than my parents 0_0.
Also I remember the same thing happening to me. Like how da hell you expect me to not be suicidal if you make me question my goddam existence every day y comparing me to others.
""ebich You are the cause of dis. Don't play around -_-""
- Me 2021
"yOu cAnT kiLl oUr bAbY" Well maybe you shouldn't have made your baby feel trapped in the ninth circle of hell and actually loved and supported him :/
@@Connor_312 fr
I think it happened once with me
And please dont tell me this happens to you often because OH NO
I'm 23 years old and live in an indian family. My parents shouts at me every single day from day to night. I moved out of house when I was 19 for the college and lived in another state. After three years of graduate studies. I worked for 2 years that too in another state. Now I had to leave my job due some reasons. And came back home. I forgot to mention I have 2 siblings as well. Nd I'm the second child. My both parents think my other two siblings are very much capable in every way. And I'm the one who is good for nothing. I was soo happy when I was living outside home. I barely smiles at home. Whatever I say turns into an argument. When I was a kid I tried to kill myself multiple times. Nd now I just wish I move out of this house as soon as soon possible.
hopefully you can get out of that household, good luck!
That really sucks! But hopefully, it gets better. Sending a big virtual hug! You are so kind and brave enough to share this experience in the comment section bringing awareness.
It never gets better. You have to watch your parents decline and get worse with age. But you will find that they effect you less and less the older you get. It never gets easier - but it becomes manageable for you and what you are capable of handling from them. Remember that your never can control or even change them- if you can you are luck and that is rare. Mostly we have to endure and stay strong for ourselves- to for anyone else - this is the key to surviving abusers. Remember that they have the problem, not you, but self care is essential and key, because their behavior actively drains the life out of you.
Imma Indian too...
Especially a south indian lesbian...
I hav almost half the stuffs listed here in my family
But whats weird is i dont feel like calling hotline or anything coz...
1. I feel like my problems r small ...
2. Im 18 years old and have been dealing with this since 9 years old..
@@hdphonector8434 you deserve to talk to someone n pain doesnt discriminate and be like oh urs is trivial. Your problems are not small they are urs.
This video less than mildly describes my childhood. My parents were verbally, physically, sexually, emotionally & mentally abusive. They made it clear they did not care if anything they did hurt me or made me feel unloved. Truth is, they WANTED to hurt me. They WANTED to abuse me. I cut ties with my entire family, and I did what I felt was best for me. "Family" is overrated, so is that bullsh*t called "love". I am better off & happier on my own. Therapy was the only place I received any form of kindness.
I don’t know if this matters or not, but every time my mum gets even slightly mad, she somehow calls me stupid in some sort of way. Like a few names are “Brainless”, “stupid”, “dumb”, “bot boy”, “you don’t know anything”.
As a father I never yell, hit, or punish my 3 children
All 3 of them turned out great. Children live what they learn. If something goes wrong I explain why it’s wrong and move on. It was WAY different than when I was a child
You're a great dad :)
You are a great dad , God may bless you 🙏
They are so, so, lucky. I'm 12 and the social workers don't believe me 😞
Thank you for being a good parent. Not alot are out there but I'm proud of you and your progress.
I would love you as a dad, but I guess my experiences with mine turned me stronger so I will not try to change my past or forget it :)
Idk how much abusive my parents are, but i will never be like them when i become a parent. Every time i see someone else with loving parents, i immeditly start bursting out a tear of jealousness, like i did this afternoon at the store when i saw a mom and her girl acting like they we're bffs and laughing at eachother.
Very relatable but with my foster family
Same :(
It makes me very upset each time I see a mother and her kid(s) giggling and laughing together and ACTUALLY getting along, I just wish that, well, my parents could be like them too - sometimes atleast.
I'm jealous to anyone who doesn't have a father who hits/doesn't scream or yell or verbally abuse or make you fight for their love. 😭😭
My dad is a diabetic and growing up he was getting so angry at me when we did nothing but he doesn’t realise it since his blood sugars go up. I used to think it was child abuse. But now thinking about it it’s hard to control these things,
Mom: (apologizes)
Me: “Maybe this time she changed?”
Mom: “So what did I say to hurt you?”
Me: (thinks) “Hmm, I guess she changed! I’m gonna tell her”
Me: (tells Mom)
**time passes**
(Fighting again)
Me: “Please STOP!” (Runs to room)
Mom: “DON’T TALK BACK TO ME!”
Mom: (walks to my door)
Mom: “You’re always hiding in that room, that’s why you’re so mentally messed up”
fools me every time…
@Bruce Rivera What they said isn't a joke
True for the middle child.......
This is the way my mother do to me almost for 3 years. My parents always say sorry to me, and when I was little around the age of 5-8 years, I always forgive my parents for what they did. But after for almost years of being like this, my parents say sorry to me but always redo the same mistakes again at the age of 10 I think I was making a fool of myself for always believing what they say about sorry. It's like parents say sorry and promise they won't do it again, but after a few weeks things turned back to what it is, and they started calling you names again and abuse you. So all those sorry they said equals to 0% so equals to also not saying sorry.
My mother: "Sweetie I am sorry I won't call you those names again"
*Not even 1 day had passed*
My mom: "Your such a lazy pig!!!"
my parents dont respect my personal space . If i go to hide in my room they are going to come in and probably hit me
@@justbert.5679 My parents just treats me like a 5 year old who doesn't know how to take care of herself, I mean my dad just keeps on watching me every single time when I was on the computer or walking. It makes me so uncomfortable.
The worst part of depression (given by your family) is that no one believes you
- pari , 2020
True
best part? even if you present a gargantuan amount of irredutable evidence to back up your claims, they still wont believe you. I tell you, denial is one hell of a drug
+
That's so hurtful :( How are you coping with depression right now?
People think I can't be sad because my parents took to me abroad and my father is a millionaire.
People say your family is a millionaire you can't be sad.
My father doesn't pay my tuition fees unless begged
no this video made me cry because of how much i didnt realize i relate (litterally almost all)
I'm a minor and I've just realized that my mother is abusive, it probably started when I was about 7 or 8. Yesterday she got drunk and came home with an alcohol bottle in her hand. She of course, verbally and physically abused me. Growing up I thought that this was normal because my grandparents would never tell me that it was bad. (PS. My mother is a single mother so I never had a father to guide me or stand up for me) This video has made me realize that my mother is abusive, I'm truly grateful for this video. Thank you.
lol my dad doesn't even apologize after beating me
R u ok?
Rasta same thing right here. he doesn't even apologize for once when he insults saying he wish that I died or he hitted me in the face.
Same but with my mom. To me that probably makes everything hurt more because you want to trust that your parents aren't doing anything wrong bc they don't admit that they are.
@@illegallyapollo1637 same she hits me hard in head lmao and she uses beltsss
@@illegallyapollo1637 she even doesn't give me privacy
I remember when my mom told me if I died she wouldn't care, she calls me fat and sl- shames me, I 17 and I have 1 more year left till I leave I waiting I hope I get out of here and find happiness
ur lucky u can leave in my country u cant leave ur parents house
@@rocky-jy5nx same, but I'll ghost them if I graduated senior high. I'll come back when they repented or after reaching my dreams.
luckyyy.. I still need 3-4 years
@@rocky-jy5nx same its sad that ill probably get arrange married to a male person even though im bisexual but i like girls more and tbh lifes just shit
@Bruce Rivera now thats extremely sad. im so sorry :(
The sad part is that they still love their parents
When you can’t remember the last time your own father told you that he loves you genuinely:
I actually can't remember... He was so mean to me a couple of minutes or hours ago cuz I spilled some water. I'm crying right now. My mother is nice tho.
The Psych2Go community basically:
2%: My parents are ok, but I'm so sorry for everyone that had to go thru these things :/
98%: Oh shit my parents screwed up lol
dats true UvU
Cut the "lol" and you get exactly how
@@ImaPizzaK I think the “lol” was a kind of coping thing, and i can relate…some people use humor as a way to cover up their problems, so just leave it be.
@@tishey1675 oh ok
True in a spiritual level, and so true ghandi would make it a quote
My parents relate to three things
1=excessively angry
2=verbal abuse
3=physical abuse
I love you
Your the real king in this world the fact that your still with us today shows how strong you are.
Your a hero ❤
I agree with all the points except for the excessively angry and verbal abuse part … parents can get so angry at the children and say harsh things because how much they love and worry for the children … if they don’t worry about their children then they wouldn’t even get so angry to begin with… isn’t it?
@@sylviastrawberry7663 I think your from a different planet you could not be more wrong
@@sylviastrawberry7663 not an excuse they can learn to be calm and explain the wrong to the child with autority not foolish anger
same
As an poc, I think we pretty much all have abusive parents. They hit us, yell and insult us for absolute shit, and more…I can’t wait to get out of this house. My parents are making me go insane
I hope that parents who are abusive to their children, whom they should love, will seek help in understanding why they are abusing their children. It can be free online today, since most parents can’t afford to pay for counseling.
And I wish people who are abusing their children would realize that it’s almost always caused by stress from debt, from not liking their jobs, from seeing any injustice for themselves or others, and just all kinds oppression in general. I hope it will help them stop being abusive, and tell their children it’s because of that. Because their children need to know, and that will hopefully help give people on both sides a bit of understanding of the others knowing the reasons, and it might help them get along better. Most parents probably don’t know why they are abusive.
And I think if everyone would just try doing something together that is fun, even if it’s just 5-10 minutes a day, it will help. And the one thing that’s cheapest and easiest is to play BALLOON BALL, as I call it, meaning hitting the balloon back and forth! So simple but fun and helps people learn to laugh at themselves! And to make it easier on parents and grandparents, buy a pool noodle from the Dollar store, cut it in half, and use them as arm-extenders! People in wheelchairs and bedridden can play that way, and it just makes people feel happier!
Because guess what? Even the richest people aren’t truly happy, and they don’t know how to have fun, even with a simple game of BALLOON BALL. No one will ever be truly happy, deep in their hearts, until there is equal wealth worldwide! Thank God for balloons! And thank God for showing all people that to be truly happy there must be equal wealth worldwide!
when i try to tell my parents about stuff like this, they always try to find a way to prove their innocence
Honestly I tried to do the same but my dad always tells me to "not listen to stupid people on the internet" and "oh I'm not like that" when he literally caused an aniety attack for me once.
Honestly my mother was more abusive (calmed down) because her father was a alcoholic who developed a serious problem with adult movies.
I hav almost half the stuffs listed here in my family
But whats weird is i dont feel like calling hotline or anything coz...
1. I feel like my problems r small ...
2. Im 18 years old and have been dealing with this since 9 years old..
True 👏 True 👏 True 👏
because they know everything you say is true, but they explode because they don’t want to get caught and they want to keep you under their thumb
Growing up with an abusive father always made me wish I was never born. Such an emotionally, verbally, and physically abusive up bringing I was brought into this world to and it’s all I’ve ever known. Makes me wish I never existed.
Stop looking at the past find people, that care about you forget to waste any of your precious time on the man that didn't want you you're splendid in what you do unfortunately your dad will never see that side just so you understand, he's just a oblivious dipstick and in time he'll realize what he missed out on and he'll regret it with every passing day like my dad did
Same here😞
same
Same
Same😢
There was a phenomenon that happened in my house where my dad was abusive to my mom, and she therefore reflected it onto me. I was the "perfect" child, so if I stepped out of line, she had an excuse. Ever since we left him, she has been so much happier and nicer.
7/8. The desire to cry from impotence at the moment, because for a long time I will have to live with all these problems and with them. Every day it kills me emotionally, and every time I want it to end as soon as possible
"Do you struggle with abuse in your family?"
This...This had me crying right away. Just knowing that someone even sounds like they care is enough to get tears swelling inside my eyes. Thank you so much for being amazing people and posting this kind of content.
Same here
'Just knowing that someone even sounds like they cares is enough to get me crying.' Jesus.. I've never heard anyone else say this but me.
This makes me sick to my stomach. I hope it will get better soon, try to reach out to someone or search help if possible. You deserve the world and you should never have been treated like that, ever. I’ll be wishing you the best and i love you. I hope you have a wonderful day
Im starting to get very violent with them. Im so tired of them treating me so bad so I been lashing out at them….breaking things and throwing things. It’s the only way I can get them to stop and leave me alone for awhile. I feel terrible
They started the action. There is no reason to feel terrible.
You deserve to feel terrible, your one of those mean people, you deserve that feeling
My parents are not teaching me how to be a good parent, they’re teaching me how to not be a bad parent
That moment you realize you've been abused your whole life without noticing: 🕳🏃♀️💨
🙂🔫
yeah, I can relate
The hole of shame
Completely relate.
Same
Some things that my parents say to me on a daily basis:
"You are too skinny"
"Eat more"
"Why arent you perfect?"
"Get better grades"
"You are so lazy"
"Why are you so scared?"
"Get better at ..... or no dinner tonight!"
Just thought I needed to share this...
Relatable..
But my mom and dad tell me that for my better future
Becuz my mom failed at maths and was not able to get a job thats why she always says study hard
And she also tells me if i am too skinny then people will insult me and all that
And she gets angry even if i make a small mistake
she gets angry easily
So there are times when i hate her
But after she scolds me she tells me i am teaching u and scolding u for your better future
So..idk
Btw I'm an Indian
BUT she never lets me sleep without having dinner
Even if i am not hungry , she says Eat food or u will get sick and all
Same but at me is just a different
parents " you're fat. ( and they're kidding about how I look ) "
Me : * trying to lose weight *
parents : "what is wrong with you ?!?! eat more !! "
And I'm like what the......
I feel sorry for ur unhealthy parents mindset
This pisses me off no one is perfect only god himself is perfect humans make mistakes and that’s ok I’m sorry you have to go through this... Your beautiful just the way you are dude!
Well, I can see how she cares about u with good grades, but the abuse is not supporting anything :(
I tried reaching out a few times with the abuse I experienced. Mine was never physical, it was psychological and verbal. I was never taken seriously about what I went through mainly because of my gender. Most people still don't take seriously us as males because society likes to assume only girls go through abuse.
For me it was simply dismissed or laughed off. And people (mostly women) still wonder why we as males don't like talking about stuff allot of the time. Because no one really listens to us! What made it worse was it was a Grandmother that I was raised with that was the abuser, Grandpa sided with her, and my mother was clueless and made it clear to me that she grew up with same thing and chose not to deal with it. My dad largely chose not to be a dad and would drift in and out of my life, largely disappearing for months or years at a time so he made it clear to me he didn't give a sh**. Some how that was made my fault for which I know it wasn't.
I was made to look like the crazy one to other members of my family by Grandmother making herself look innocent and it was all made up in my head. In 2002, I made a permanent break and disowned myself from any of them. It is going on 21, almost 22 years. My mother writes me all the time demanding I write to her. But I refuse to answer because she chose not to protect me from such an atmosphere. She is nasty and mean in her notes, I don't respond to anyone who wants to pretend herself that nothing was ever wrong.
My dad died in December of 2020, only to find out he had been dead for 18 months without any word of it before and was made to feel at fault for it. I know I am not but that's not love, that's abusive. Why anyone bothered to tell me at all about that just to get blamed for supposedly being cold and heartless and not caring about his death is beyond me. Big hurtful words from people who think they know me when they know nothing of me. They never cared about who I was. I don't feel sorry for myself, why would I? I didn't choose who raised me. Nobody ever does. Just remember that to any who had experienced abuse of any form. I am 44 as of the time of this writing, I never had kids for which I chose not to (I can't for health reasons) and single, relationships don't work for me. I am still trying to figure out who I am and trying to find real peace for myself. The PTSD is pretty severe. No woman would put up with that, I can barely deal with it myself. Like I said I don't feel sorry for myself, I have to find peace within myself in my life before ever sharing it with another successfully. And if it takes a lifetime. I'm prepared for it.
My dad always treats my lil brother like an angel and shouts at me like never before if I make the slightest mistake, heck if he feels like it he will scold me until I criple down crying just because he feels like it, making up new rules or altering them just to have an excuse.
I don't know why but when I heard them say "Parents should love and support their kids no matter what" I started to cry really hard, and I couldn't stop after 2 minutes. They sometimes make threatening jokes whilst holding onto a sharp object, now I flinch and scream out of reflex everytime they come near me with something sharp.
both of my parents have threatened to starve me and my dad actually tried to one time. he just took my food as a "punishment" hurting your child is not punishment, thats abuse
Jesus Christ...
I’ll pray for you tonight !
omg.
that’s not okay pls get help from someone who can help you. omg
My mom: *gets physically abusive and insults me*
Me: *cry’s and runs to my room with my door shut*
Also my mom: *why is she sad?, hMmM i WoNdEr*
*It'S bEcAuSe Of ThAt DaMn PhOnE*
@@spoiled_birthday_cake Fr that’s all they say.
@@maxxit_co7977 sometimes I think parents (toxic ones) are all the same but with different skin packs and names.
Toxic players are like toxic parents which makes them both stupid
I used to ran to the bathroom and lock the door to escape from her. Then she had invented a way. I bought some novels and had placed them on my table. I loved those books and she knew it. When she started to beat me and I ran into bathroom to escape, then she would through away my beloved books and tear them apart; so that I could see and get out of the bathroom to save my books. Then she would grab me again to teach lessons again.
Grown in an Indian household has affected me mentally. My father was physically and verbally abusive and threathing. He used to beat the shit out of me if I don’t do things according to his wishes. Now I suffer from PTSD, depression, emotional disconnect, and low self esteem. Sometimes I don’t know how to cope with them and think if it’s worth living. I don’t remember one single moment from my childhood when I was happy - Infact I don’t remember anything from my childhood. I just hated it so much. I just wanted to grow up and move out of my parents house and never visit them again - that’s only I remember from my childhood.
when I was kid I often experienced physical violence, such as being beaten by my parents. At that time I was very scared, I was traumatized
My dad: *yells at me for 30 minutes straight and takes everything that makes me happy*
Him 10 minutes later: sorry
Edit: I’m so sorry that all of you have to go through what I am going through or worse. But an update on my dad, he doesn’t even apologize anymore and just makes a joke out of it later and gets upset when I don’t want to talk with him. He also tells me I should focus more on my grades than my mental health, and tells me I am faking my anxiety when he is the reason I have anxiety in the first place.
same but cut the sorry and make it worse everytime, 5-8 times a day.
Same
Sometimes my mom just expects me to forget what happened and "move on"
@@darkangel2758 listen I go through the same thing but you CANT tell them their dad is nice. NO. What their parent is doing is gaslighting PLUS you telling them they are lucky is also abuse. STOP.
@@darkangel2758 Do NOT say their dad is nice. That invalidates their emotions. And even if they do say sorry it’s STILL. FUCKING. ABUSE. If you use what you’re going through as an excuse to invalidate someone, you are toxic. I understand you’re going through something terrible, but because of that, instead of comparing it and making the other person feel like shit for feeling this way, you should be able to empathize or understand how they feel.
@@darkangel2758 I’m starting to think you might be lying, if you are that’s fucked up
Just a quick reminder for all parents there:
You chose to have children not them so you have no right to control them with there life choices
👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
Imagine parents seeing this video and they said that it isn’t true
Just because parents have rights doesn’t mean they can do whatever they want
I heard of one girl whose parents liked to control every part of her life and she was never allowed to make decisions. She grew up terrified of her parents, and would dread weekends and school breaks because that means she has to be with her parents. She could never predict when her parents would lash out and when an episode happened, her parents would ignore her for weeks by refusing to acknowledge her or even look in her direction. When her parents get mad, they would sometimes throw a backpack across the room at her, make her kneel outside the house all night as punishment, and tell her they rather see her dead than see her face the next morning. During 11th grade, she was on track to graduate with all As until she got a C in calculus. No matter how hard she studied, her parents constantly berated her for getting a C and convinced her that she is a wasted human. Her parents said “How could you stand to look at yourself in the mirror knowing you didn’t try hard enough. You lied to us. We thought you could get into a better university. If I see you on the street crippled and begging for money, I won’t even look at you twice. I have no daughter.” That was when her depression started. When her parents found out that she’s taking prescribed meds from a psychiatrist and seeing a therapist, her parents threw away her meds and cut her insurance. Her parents never took accountability and always told her it was her fault. She did everything she could to please her parents, and often justified her parents abuse for her not being a little more perfect. It took her hundreds of therapy sessions for her to accept that was not the way a child should be treated.
I'm having awful flashback memories because of the list. It hurts.
Sorry to hear :( You don't have to watch it if it's triggering! How are you feeling right now?
@@Psych2go I'm doing Ok I think. Frankly it amazes me how some families are just so, well, "family-like." It's as if each of their family member knows each of their needs and just do their best to help. Each provides encouragement without mockery, condescention nor spite, just the genuine honest care.
TBH I really envy those that grew up in a functional family. They've got some wonderful memories to carry til the end of their life.
Sameee
@@mediocrebanters Sameeeee like they can be happy and achieve their dreams without hiding em from their parents and how their parents support em in almost every thing...this just feel so unfair idek why
yeah me too, it's like vietnam flashbacks
I can’t even count how many times my parents yelled at my older brother because of his grades, and I don’t know how to tell them to stop. It really hurt how much I relate to this video. Things like this are not okay and shouldn’t be joked about.
@Barok Espinoza Thank you, that made me feel a bit better :)
@Barok Espinoza Ty :)
Don’t worry you should confort your brother in every way possible create beutiful memories with him and make sure he feels loved i think this will make him for courageous and maybe when the day comes confront your parents and tell them that this isn’t right and that they should go to hell
@@ilikeanime9150 I’ve been thinking about confronting my parents recently, I just need to build up the confidence to do it..
Ture
Help is not just a phone call away. It is not easy to get help outside your home. Believe me, no one cares. And once you make it out of your abusive home you may get this illusion will get easier. It won't, you probably will meet an abusive partner and yourr inlaws will for sure not be good to you unless you are 1% of the lucky people. This is my advice : try your best to make it on your own, get a degree and focus solely on your future. It may be difficult, because if you suffer from mental illness it may be difficult to get the degree or even keep a job. If this is the case, just stay in your home until you find a job or a way out that you can test whilr you still have a roof over your head. I'm talking from experience. Just try to find way to adapt to your parents, and learn how to not trigger them, do your best. While you work on your plan out on your own. Dont rely on someone else, because they will start being abusive as well and then you're stuck in the same scenario. I've had this mentality that I wanted to make it on my own. And unfortunately I failed due to severe mental illness that made me dysfunctional in society. And believe me it is absolutely difficult to get any help at all.
8/8. i never feel safe at home and when im leaving from school i wanna cry knowing i have to go back.
My mom:
"Why are you sad?"
"No reason"
"Tell me!"
*"Tells her what she did"*
"It's your fault/You're overreacting/Stop being a baby/ I don't care/You deserved it/ Suck it up.
Yeahhh I got kicked out and went to my dad's office for safety.
What ro do if we are all the same I'm muslim I live in completely different society but I can relate to all what you have just said
I KNOW RIGHT LIKE THEY KEEP ON INSISTING YOU TELL THEM AND THEN THEY MAKE FUN OF YOU ABOUT IT 💀💀💀
@@_magic_. Ye but it’s heartbreaking, because it happens to when I talk to people, the only person who did not make fun of it was the police, but that didn’t helped either :/
@@_magic_. you’re laughing about it but inside it hurts more than a blade
@@namenlosspamsr3245 gurl why you exposing me like that 😰
man i remember my mom telling me if i ran away from home, she would break my legs so i couldn't go anywhere. i was literally 8 ish and extremely terrified.
and that is why I was always yo scary to run away.
I was thinking if I run and they find me they'll kill me. ( I still think this )
@@tudosaalessandra3405 same 😌
The only thing stopping me from running away is my sense of abandonment, My asshole of a sperm donor leaves me with a verbally (sometimes physically) abusive mother who marries a selfish, abusive, critic that I have to a call dad. The only thing stopping me is being alone.
Im 18 and she still says that
I wonder why parents say that to literal kids. My mom told me the same thing when I was 7
Thank you. My mom only hugged me after punishment. I didnt realize how much of this i relate to. I didnt realize that for most people, spilling a cup or breaking a glass was just that and parents are supposedly to just wipe your tears and help clean. You really help so much.
As a 20 year old, my mom is verbally and emotionally abusive. When were around my grandparents and the rest of the family, shes nice and sweet. Its been going on like this for years and nobody has stopped her at all.
I never realised that my father was emotionally abusing me untill recently, my whole life feels like a lie.
@Marcus Sengkhounmany Same buddy
same
I relate, both parents for me
Its common esp in Asia.
Same I guesss
Although my parents aren't physically abusive, they are emotionally. My mom is very munipulative and takes her anger out on us. She also throws insults at us ever since we were little and it has severely affected my mental health. And my dad used to be physical, but isn't really anymore. But he still makes threats and uses fear to control what I do. I remember he was mad one day and he came into the house while I was cleaning. He only came in for a second then left, but I had my back turned to the door so I didn't watch him. And when he left he slammed the door and I just felt my heart drop. I got so scared, thinking he was about to smack me or something. But because of my parents, I have depression, anxiety, low self-esteem, I have issues of starving myself and not allowing myself to feel happy or good enough. So yeh. Now I know what kind of parents I don't want to be
I've similar mental issues. I'm self destructive which I feel is better than loving myself. Loving myself is embarrassing. It's weird to many people but this is how I truly feel and I know there are a lot of people like me.
My dad and mom emotianaly abuse my brother and im scared its coming for me next. idk about my other siblings but i love my parents and it makes me so sad
I use fear to control MYSELF lol
My parents are mentally abusive. They want me to do like what they said.they compare me to others. Sometimes I think about suicide, but then i think about them.
Came across all this in my childhood.. Now I am protecting my small sister (cousin) at all cause
❤️ that’s very courageous of you. I had an abusive childhood and I recently become close with my aunt who is like an older sister to me. She’s really helped me out. I’m sure your younger sister appreciates what you do and loves you :)
"I'm going to give you a reason to cry" is etched into my brain
The only thing my parents don't check off here is the "drugs/alcohol" one. Tbh I never really considered them abusive because I know they love me but... Now..
Same
Same
Narcissism
My stepdad loves to drink bud light at night sometimes he drinks 4 bottles in one night. He seems more fun to be around cuz he acts goofy and less strict.
@@Dots988 my parents beat me with wooden planks- but only cause back in there hometown they used to do that to them 👀
I’d rather die than becoming my dad.... what a piece of crap he is. If you read this I hope your situation will be improved asap❤️
I rather be a hot babe rat then be sloppy, obese, sorta lazy and homophobic like my dad
I wish the same.. That is the biggest motive in my life actually.. (Including my mom)
As do I
I usually never leave comments however my father uses drugs and alcohol pretty frequently and is very abusive. From almost beating my brother to death to threatening of kicking me out because i don’t say “hello” or “goodbye” I’ve always been an introverted quiet kid, however now I’m almost 17 with a job and I’m grateful to be able to move out and enjoy my life and cut ties with my abusive and manipulative father.
Reminder:your parents love you, they really do some of parents that abuses their children are not ready/doesn't understand being a parent/parenting, example:
-strict parents:they're too worry about their kids being mentally/physically hurt, they're scared if they don't give their kids attention their kids will turned out horrible trust me some of them are just not ready to be a parent/their parents are strict parents too:) ❤!
-parents who verbally abuses their child.
Some of them can't really understand children,and some also treat their kids the way their parents treat them, but i believe they love their kids very much❤ they just don't understand on parenting😕(some of them)
I know that's still not a good reason to abuses ur children verbally nor physically but its just a reminder how ur parents still love you no matter what, whoever have this kind of parents, i hope ur okay and healthy rn, I'm very proud of you to be this far on life❤. Life is though and all but i know we can do it:)
STAY STRONG Y'ALL! ❤