AITA For Walking Out Of My Best Friend's Wedding? - REACTION
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- Опубликовано: 5 апр 2022
- AITA For Walking Out Of My Best Friend's Wedding? - REACTION
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Hey ya'll! Today on my channel we are reacting to some posts on one of the spiciest reddit threads around, AITA.In this video, a woman asks if she is the the AH for WALKING OUT of a bridezilla's wedding, a man who asks if he was in the wrong for making his girlfriend change out of a dress, and a mother who asked if she's the AH for throwing out all of her son's belongings.
#aita #bride #bridezilla #entitledbride #wedding #aitapost #redditaita #reaction #charlottedobreio #react #reactionchannel #charlottedobreio #charlottedobr
Hi, I'm Charlotte Dobre. I'm an actor, reactor, singer and sometimes (not really) comedian. On this channel I do reactions, commentary and occasionally I crack a joke or two. I upload daily, usually 7 days a week, unless life gets crazy or I get lazy. Come hang out, it's a good time.
Edited by Timothy Dunsmore
Produced by: Vanessa Peprah-Addo
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Развлечения
For the bully teenager: To let him choose between apologizing to his victim and being grounded was the first mistake. The apology should have been mandatory.
Agreed. The problem here is that the teenager has no concept that his actions have hurtful and harmful consequences. His punishment should reflect the hurt he caused or be spent correcting that hurt, period. The goal should be for him to realize that he can't be an a-hole to other people without consequences, lest he should grow up and mess with the wrong person. (I live in a city with a very high crime rate amongst teens and young adults...it usually starts with somebody dissing someone else.)
Nope. Would not be sincere. Would just teach him that words mean nothing.
Agreed
Disagree… forced apologies aren’t apologies. They’re manipulation.
.
Since the bride didn't apologize after the wedding shows it wasn't about stress in the moment; it was a character flaw.
Such a good point 🙌
Yep her personality sucks. And the three friends going off on OP? I’d just move on
Yes! Also, most of us would have apologized and recalibrated when a bridesmaid (very nicely) told us we needed to chill and stop abusing the poor hairdresser. But she doubled down...
Beautiful 👌🏻
I dunno, I believe that by walking out, they damaged the friendship beyond any form of repair.
Regarding the bridesmaid that walked out, I once watched my sister, who is a breast cancer survivor, tell another relative that having cancer doesn’t give you the right to be an asshole. He was fighting cancer and was being extremely hostile and abusive to everyone in the family-until my sister shut him down, that is.
That said, if having cancer doesn’t give you the right to treat people like crap, then neither does getting married!!!!
Bravo to your sister! May she lead a long happy life!
Much respect to your sister. I hope she has a happy life😊
As someone with stage IV breast cancer…here here! Sometimes you have a stressful day, that’s ok. Cancer is stressful. But to make it your personality and treat people like garbage. No. There is never a good reason for that. Never.
Absolutely just like I told someone who suffered from bipolar disorder and borderline personality disorder that it didn’t give her the right to abuse and bully and treat ppl who love her like crap and that was her excuse for all of it and how I wouldn’t understand but I actually have bipolar disorder and borderline personality disorder and ADHD and fetal alcohol syndrome and cptsd and she shut her mouth quick after I told about mine and I always treat people with respect no matter what and that it isn’t an excuse at all
The white dress story: they weren't being controlling about what she wore. They asked her if she could please change so they could avoid being rude. then she called them an abuser. that's ridiculous.
I am on how she felt free to call all her friends and tell them he was being abusive. He escaped a lot of potential drama.
Probably just butt-hurt that she wasn't able to get her way.
What's super gross to me too is that controlling how someone dresses IS a thing and IS abusive but that wasn't even what happened. The dude said 'you're not wearing white to a friend's wedding', that's not controlling it's setting a boundary, if he had torn the dress off her and dressed her up in a dress he liked then yeah that would've been abuse.
It's bonkers that anyone in his friend group agreed with her.
@@boanoah6362 exactly. He didn’t say “you look too sexy and I don’t want men to look at you” he gave her a perfectly reasonable explanation. Calling him abusive is purely manipulative.
Also, if you immediately involve your friends in our disagreement and have them call or text me, I’m out. That will never end.
That story pissed me off. Coming from someone who was abused by a SO in the past, it really makes me angry when a woman refers to something like that as 'abuse'. Especially when all he was asking her to do was be respectful at a wedding.
That last story has me furious. OP's son not only set up some poor girl, pretended to want to take her on a date, stood her up, TOOK PHOTOS of her, and disseminated those photos around the school to bully her. That? That is NOT a prank. WTF? And OP's decision was to ask THE SON what kind of punishment he wanted? They should have marched him down to the school and made him publicly apologize to that girl on top of grounding him. Not given him the OPTION to write a NOTE of apology or grounding. So he chose grounding and he STILL DIDN'T APOLOGIZE. And he straight up ignored his grounding. Jesus. OP is just raising a bully who doesn't respect girls now and won't respect women later. Everyone involved except for the girl he was "pranking" sucks.
Agreed- they really downplayed what he did when they told their story!
Seeems like he won't respect anyone in general from how entitled he sounded.
Absofreakinglutely!!
yeah parents punish their kids these days as if the offense was to them personally like some weird revenge campaign! Like it's so petty and not the good kind! That's not effective discipline! Punishment should not only fit the crime but rectify it as much as possible! I've been bullied like that girl and it's psychologically traumatizing! It's that patronizing sentiment of "oh you are so adorably delusional, thinking anyone could actually be interested in you! hahahaha" The little asshole caused harm to the girl not the parents. It's the girl who needs reparations not the parents!
Yes! And they only reason the girl got an apology was because that was punishment for disrespecting his parents, not because she was a victim of his and his friends harassment. WTF?
When she even HINTED at cutting her from the wedding as a bridesmaid, she sealed her fate. The response of "I'll save you the trouble" was the right one. No worthy friend would ever say something like that after you'd obviously bent over backwards to make her day great.
Exactly. The bride just walked right into that one. The friend? NTA.
this here. i don’t do empty threats. if you hint it, you really mean it but just don’t want to say it. i think i would have just put up with it for the wedding and cut her off after, but op wasn’t wrong to leave
the fact that she gave the phone number to her mother and played victim afterwards really shows the kind of bridezilla she was. I dont blame op or others one bit for dropping out. She was clearly trying to intimidate people to stay and got upset when she couldnt, people who are going to emotionally manipulate like that arent worth a second thought, regardless of stress. Good for OP.
Yes. The BRIDE suggested it to be so! And since it was on the table...why not?
@@LeonieJMerry OMG! That happened to me too! My ex would do that every time I brought up issues in the relationship and then would turn around berate me for being quiet when I was upset. I told him after the last instance that I couldn't handle it again and it would be real if he said it again. Lo and behold, he did it only a couple weeks later and was a crying mess that I took him up on the offer. After a month or two, we got back on good terms and he explicitly said "I don't think it could ever work out between us again". So I had no qualms about getting a new boyfriend. And once again, he was a stunned crying mess saying "I thought we would get back together! How could you?!". He clearly just thrived getting me to beg for him to stay and making me feel like I was the problem at all times. (I wasn't always the best, to be clear. I was like 19-22, insecure, and childish. But I at least didn't threaten to leave because I was being called out)
Glad I stopped being so insecure and saw it for what it was, even though it took me awhile to get there. Good for you doing the same! Once you step up for yourself that way, it's very hard to let that shit slide ever again.
I have a feeling that parent is minimizing what her son did by using the word prank, something tells me it was far worse than a prank
I agree. She even minimized it by the 'punishment' to begin with. He can apologize or get grounded for a few weeks?' First of all why does he get to choose which one he does and why only one of those things? And why does she think thats good enough. Also, taking away his things should have been step 1, not a last resort. She should have donated them, not thrown them out a window, but still she should have taken that stuff away from him. Having to spend time in your own room really isn't a punishment, even if he did go along with the punishment.
@@Meangrl19I don’t think completely getting rid of the devices would be affective, she seems like the type of parent to buy it all back (probably newer) anyway. I don’t think the vast majority of punishments are helpful from my own experience but I am also extremely adhd so we tend to either respond poorly to punishment because it’s neurodiverse behavior (or a punishment heavily used to punish such behavior that we literally cant control making it effective) or the “it’s not here so it never existed” affect kicks in.
Once I was grounded from my bedroom and my mom tried to take away the tv in the living room. She quickly realized she was actually the one being punished because adhd child+ no stimulation+ mom on night shift= no sleep. One of the most ineffective punishments was my fathers doing though, he decided, probably justified, that I was not allowed to read during breakfast because I wouldn’t get ready. So he put my book on the top of the fridge. I get the adhd from him. We both forgot that book existed and where it went but it was a library book so my mom had to pay 20 bucks for this beat up book. About 4 months later when my mom was doing a deep clean she found it and that’s how my dad got yelled at. Adhd kids are hard but naturally tend to be people pleasers so just throw enough empathy at them and don’t make them into supervillains and they will likely be fine. You know and actually understand what’s the adhd and what’s actual misbehavior.
In the last story, I just can't get past thinking about the poor girl he bullied, and how it seemed like his parents didn't even take that very seriously, at least from what was written. It felt like one of those 'boys will be boys' situations. I only wish they were more concerned about their son's character, and how he will treat women later in his life if this is what he does at 17. Punishment aside, this would have been a great opportunity for some serious discussions about how a real man should treat others with respect always, and maybe some mentoring in some fashion. I have to admit, I thought what they did by throwing all his stuff on the lawn was pretty hilarious, only I would not have helped him put it all back!
@2 Blessed, I do think the parent’s took it seriously. For one, the parents showed to have zero tolerance for bullying, and didn’t let him get away with it. Their methods of punishment were a problem. 1, they shouldn’t have let the son pick the punishment, he should have had to do both the apology and being grounded. 2, They should have taken away all his electronics. 3, They should have found a way to make him understand what he did was wrong. There are people saying that throwing his stuff out the window was petty and vindictive, however the son bluntly disrespected his parents by sneaking out behind their backs, so of course they would be pissed.
People also have to understand that parents can’t control everything their kids do. No matter how well you educate your kid, you can’t stop them from messing up; The parents did take what the son did seriously, but their punishments just weren’t good enough.
She likely broke hundreds of dollars worth of stuff, which she will have to buy again. It’s pretty dumb.
@ 2 Blessed we think alike😂
Helping him put everything back shows their relationship isn't broken. Not helping him would have bred resentment and would certainly cause further problems.
But look at their response. Wonder where he learned to be such an a-hole
For the co-worker wedding conflict: I honestly think that his gf purposely wore that off-white dress. She already told OP that she LOVES weddings-- so she knows about wedding etiquette.
Agreed. The Ahole is the one wearing an off-white dress to a strangers wedding.
I think she was kinda trying to put the idea of getting married... She wanted him to pop the question...
He should have that married colleague to talk to those who accuse op of being controlling. See what they have to say straight to the BRIDE’s face
Absolutely. My Husband's EX actually pulled this at our wedding and her Boyfriend (who was the only one actually invited) tried to convince her not to do it but she was a brat and didn't listen. I just acted casual because I didn't want to make a scene and karma has gotten her back a bit since so it's all good at this point but yeah everyone knows the rule so I'm inclined to say it was on purpose
@Haemry Art That's a really good point; I hadn't even thought about that
First story. She threatened to kick her out of the wedding. Clearly people are disposable to the bride. OP just cashed in on the offer.
Hang on, best friend, wedding, planning nearly 2 years, walking out as a bridesmaid….. you my dear are the a hole no matter what story you come up with.
Preach!
People are so used to getting screwed over by "brides" that they would take any crap and call it compromise or a "friendship". The bridesmaid made the best decision of her life, that was never a friend that was a psycho waiting to emerge.
Makes you wonder why the other bridesmaids chose not to participate.
why the devil should people 'suck it up'?!?
The bridesmaid that walked on her friends wedding was perfect. Just like she said, stress isn't an excuse for shitty behavior. Proud of her.
Agree with you 100%!! Glad she left!! No excuse to treat someone like that however stressed you are!! It was done as a favor and I find it interesting that so many of the other bridesmaids found so many reasons not to participate!!
For the mom bully:my brother used sneak out and leave our entire family vulnerable to anyone. So one day my parents Took everything out of his room to it all to my aunt’s house and told him we got robbed but they only took his stuff 😂😂 he learned his lesson 😭
😂😂😂
"Stress isn't a reason to talk down to someone"
This 100% is exactly why OP isn't the asshole. Be stressed, but don't be abusive to someone who had gone out of their way to help you.
And the bride told her she was going to cut her as a brides maid for being upset at her for the abuse.
I think the reason bridezillas came about is because girls grow up believing that a wedding gives them the perfect excuse to act badly without getting in trouble. And they aren't told otherwise.
Can't explain the GF in story 2 though. Unless she always has to have attention on her.
Yup. If being tired and/or stressed was an excuse to verbally abuse another person, then all those costumers who scream at cashiers would get a pass. Because it's always, "They may have been having a bad day." or "They didn't mean to, so don't take it to heart." If a person is going to talk down to you, walking away is usually the best response.
I snap at people when I'm stressed but then I immediately apologize because I know it's not their fault (unless it is of course like someone fucks something up on purpose) but I can't even fathom the people that freak out on others, continue to act like they are right, shit talk the other person, and just continue on without having a single thought that maybe they were in the wrong and they have no dignity
I’ve talked down to my husband while stressed. Especially during my pregnancies. However, every single time I’ve acted irrationally, I feel terrible afterwards, and I go to him and apologize. He does the same to me when he’s stressed about work, and always apologizes. The fact that the bride didn’t apologize to her is definitely indicative of a very clear character flaw. If anything, the friend walking out on her wedding possibly taught her a lesson in taming her tongue….though I doubt it, based on her reaction weeks later, and her refusal to see how horrible she was to the very few number of bridesmaids actually willing to stand up in her wedding.
@@DrawciaGleam02 No. Bridezillas only come about if the person is already an AH. That day just magnifies it.
I was the least stressed person at my wedding. Yes, I did 100 % of the planning. Not everything went perfect and I had to roll with some adjustments but that is life! I was determined to enjoy my wedding and the MOST Important thing was that I was marrying my best friend.
Same here. I just posted something very similar. Hell, I painted my own nails on my wedding day. It was such a chill, happy day.
awe! thats so sweet you probably look amazing together
Exactly the right attitude. Being a control freak is so stressful. Solution: don’t be a control freak. And the unplanned stuff that happens at weddings can become fun stories to tell the grandkids.
100% yeeeessss, that's all that matters...a wedding is one day I could care less about those details when I get the rest of my life w who I love
Stress goes on with the level of the planning if ur planning is shit, ull be stressed as hell. If u planned well, u can breathe on the day of the wedding
My mom took the computer mice to work with her when she discovered that I was skipping school in seventh grade. Then for the rest of my school years she changed her work schedule and drove me down to the end of our driveway and we sat there until the bus arrived to ensure that I was going to school. Honestly, best thing that ever happened to me because we became very, very close from that. Because of me skipping school and her finding out, I never attempted suicide like I had planned that year and I came to confide in her about everything. I get hyper attached to one or two people and up to that point, I both was and wasn't hyper attached to either of my parents. I loved them, but I didn't tell them everything (I didn't tell anyone everything at that point) and I also didn't like being away from home for any significant amount of time. Probably more of an anti-social/socially awkward issue than being hyper attached. The only bad thing is now she's gone (she died in 2018) and I still haven't recovered, though I am now finally able to talk about her without breaking down crying.
So sorry for your loss. She loved you a lot.
i'm so sorry for your loss. I hope you are doing better !
So sorry for your loss but this story is beautiful and I’m glad you got that time with her. She sounds like she was a great mother ❤
I am sorry for your loss, truly! Your Mom sounds like a great lady! She is still with you, always. Live your life like she is watching because she is. Sounds like you appreciate all she did and that is great, it helps set you on your own path. I hope you have a happy life, I am sure it is what your Mom wanted for you too! Big hugs from this grandma!
For the coworkers wedding: one fact to always keep in mind when you're a +1 is that you are an amplification of the invited guest. If you are respectful, it shows to the host that OP (in this case) has the utmost respect. If you do anything to show disrespect, then it signals that OP has disdain for the host.
It is always taken as the guest is in full support of the +1's actions, regardless of gender and relationship.
the last one...parents failed in the most important thing: to make their son realize that he was actually wrong, bullying the student. The aftermath complaining to his aunt shows that he still thinks he’s been right
If they aren't careful he's going to turn into the guy at college that gets #metood
Not to mention they, (the parents), are pretty much being a bully to their son, so maybe they should write an apology letter to him as well?
Only because the second punishment was a reaction to lying to their parents. Not a reaction to ignoring his bullying.
The parents took it personally instead of focusing on why he was in trouble in the first place.
I also think apologizing to the student he bullied shouldn’t have been an option. That should have been a requirement
@@zaribelle718 absolutely
I love the "logic" with the white dress that "her dress doesn't effect you!" Yeah, it does though. If your plus 1 ruins a wedding it's 100% your fault for bringing said plus one.
I actually think weddings are a really good relationship test. Most couples are just excited to see each other all dressed up and dance the night away together, but in some cases (like here) your partner could reveal their true colors. I think it was good they parted ways. There is no way she didn’t know what she was doing with an off-white dress!!
First story: NTA! Ask your friend who was called an idiot how she feels about it. I can't imagine not standing up for her. You did well.
#1 Never take ANY kind of abuse, EVER. Not at a wedding, not at a Bday party, baby shower, Christmas party, funeral….NEVER EVER! Walking away instead of interacting is always best.
Right? I cannot believe the OP's friends, family, & even her own boyfriend said that she should have just taken the abuse. "It's just for one day."
Ok, so where is the line drawn for them? If her boyfriend beats her up, should she just take it because it's just for one day?
If she attends a family gathering & they verbally abuse her, should she just take it because it's just for one day? Do they have that attitude because that happens?
I feel so sorry for her, because it seems like everyone in her life is toxic.
How can you be abused, when you shower your baby`? O.o
@@JamieM470 good point!
That is true, walking away from the situation works most times, but if the person who is being abusive may be the type to attack you for not talking and/or attack you for walking away.
@@thetruecrystalvixen That is only a small price to pay in my opinion... Call everyone you know inclouding the police if you have to, let people be there but just go.
First story- leaving is fine. When you invite 9 girls to your bridal party and only 4 agree that speaks volumes about the bride.
OP bent over backwards to help and got abuse in return. Stress isn't an excuse to be a dick.
Exactly!
Yes, I caught that too! Beware of people who “fall out” with others frequently. OP said she’d fallen out with more than one of the original 9 so that would have been a major warning sign to me.
Also probably not a coincidence that the hair stylist cancelled.
100% I've been the best friend who bent over backwards for a bridezilla like this. People like this are atrocious and hurt everyone around them to get their way.
The guy who asked his gf to change to her dress, I had a similar situation with a guy. We went out on one date and after the date I sent him a screenshot of a joke that I knew he'd appreciate, because he told me a very similar one on the date. Boy was that a BAD idea. He basically noticed that I was talking to another Guy on that screenshot ((the other guy is my happily married best-friend who doesn't even live in the same Country as me)) Anyway he kicked off and straight away called me a "Head-f*ck" I ended it then and there. If he can insult me so easily and over something so small I didn't want to find out what else would set him off, and how he'd react to it. If you can't handle a disagreement without the use of insults and name calling you're not worth dating.
Story 1: You can feel everything you want, but you have no right to be cruel to others. Once the bride became cruel, she lost right to any belevoence from others. Marriage is not "your day" is a day to celebrate the couple.
Plus if the wedding day is the be all and end all of your marriage you're most likely going to be divorced within a year. All you really want is the big party with yourself as the center of attention
I will N E V E R understand why folks feel the need to wear white at someone else’s wedding. Like, why would you feel comfortable to upstage the bride?! Who failed you in life to make you feel like you need to be the main character in every situation?! Seek help love. ❤️
Those who want to be the bride at every wedding and the corpse at every funeral? :)
I personally can't fathom how many neutral colors are there. White dresses are literally speaking something in church to me
Me neither my sister-in-law's sister even did it at 1 of her friends wedding, I called her out saying Though you look beautiful wearing a white lace dress is not appropriate To wear to a wedding, She replied the bride didn't care and she got tons of compliments all night, so you took attention away from the bride...? She was mad but like what the hell was she thinking....
It's one thing to not realise that this is a thing but when it's pointed out to you there's no excuse
I want to meet some of these women who like to wear white on other people's weddings and invite them to mine.
I also want the photographer to capture their disappointed faces as I step in wearing a blood red gown, with black lace and a shit-eating grin.
SHE KNEW THE WHITE DRESS RULE! Every woman does! She had a motive!
I mean she knew it, she was arguing that it was an outdated tradition that deals with virginity and stuff.
For my friend's destination wedding they had a formal luncheon the day before the wedding. I asked the bride if I could wear my favorite white blouse with black pants, she said it was totally fine, but I STILL ended up going with a blue top instead, because I worried other guests would side-eye me. This girl definitely had some ulterior motive, lord knows what she was trying to do.
Op saved himself from embarrassment because it the boss was at wedding, the next when he goes he might have fired because it could be seen as disrespectful
To be totally honest...I really didn't know that until I came across these videos (and I'm pretty glad I found out before I fucked up). My parents are not from the US, so we never really knew all the American wedding tradition rules, and I'm not someone who cares about having a wedding at all, so I never really paid attention to any of that stuff. But I'm aware that I'm wedding-dumb so if someone told me to change, I'd just take their word for it and do it.
When I was 12, I wore a white dress with purple flowers to my cousin’s wedding. It wasn’t until YEARS later that I learned the rule! I felt horrible for a long time until the subject randomly came up while chatting with a few family members. I apologized to my cousin’s wife for my error. She looked at me confused for a second and said “I didn’t even notice.”
Would I do that today? Absolutely not. I was also a child at the time and this was long before Reddit was even a thing.
It still baffles me that there are so many stories involving white outfits at weddings.
Yeah the teenage bully is tough because they’re both a-holes, parent and child. As someone who was grounded for most of my preteens and teens (for “laziness” and poor grades [I had undiagnosed ADhD]) and was also bullied, it’s somewhat upsetting to hear my groundings were as severe or more so for not doing homework than his for bullying classmates and dodging consequences.
When I was younger, my main punishment was to be grounded. Which I was completely fine with, because I just read books the entire time. I would quickly hide my books when I heard my parents coming, so it took them a while to figure that out. When they did though, my groundings included taking my books away - that was the worst punishment. It’s funny because my brothers were always forced to read or do nothing because they hated reading!
In 6th grade my parents took away all of my books because of my grades. Not a normal solution to a kids whose grades are too low and not one that addressed the problem (I didn't get the ADHD diagnosis I needed until just last year, now that it's too late to really help me with school... but it was worth it for my own peace of mind and understanding of myself!) but my grades *did* improve.
Lmao when they took my books I would just lie down and sleep, sing and dance to myself or make nice stories on my head fully dissociating in time. That didn't work on me and drove my family INSANE
I had different punishments for different kids because they were different. My youngest son got in a fight at school, both of them were in the wrong as they admitted when they were in the Principal’s office with the other boy’s parents and us. The school gave them two weeks of ISS-in school suspension. My husband bought a door knob with a key and put it on his bedroom door. I told him to get his pillow, blanket, and clothes for school the next day and we locked him out of his room…tv, video games, laptop locked in his room. He loved his room so for the rest of the week, it was Tuesday, no room. He slept on the couch.
The older i get, the more I believe in the philosophy of "If I agree to do you a favor, and you treat me like crap or take out anger on me for things I'm not at fault for....nope, I'm out." There is NEVER an excuse to abuse or be rude to people doing a favor. That includes being a bridesmaid...isn't some special award, you're doing the bride a favor.
I have reached the point of having zero tolerance for that crap.
"A friend would suck it up for the wedding"....no, a REAL friend wouldn't berate & insult their friends just because they're stressed out.
💯
And a real friend might make a mistake and be rude, but would feel bad about it and apologize afterwards! This bride didn't do that either. Total bridezilla!
@@DutchIsraeli Yup! And yes, I fully agree and acccept that we're just human and can snap for a split second...but as you say, an ACTUAL friend would catch themselves and at least apologize. But no, she didn't seem to apologize & did it repeatedly with at least 2 people...probably EVERYONE.
Exactly!!! I do not understand how people can tell you to just suck it up. No, you are enabling bad behavior and entitlement if you do that!
Hear, hear!!!
So... I'm torn on the last one.
He is 17, and was legitimately bullying someone and when he DECIDED to take the punishment he probably knew he could sneak out. You're giving him too much slack for being one year removed from being an adult.
Although i do agree the punishment wasn't fitting the crime. He should've had to apologize, face to face to the girl and her parents, and be grounded for the rest of the school year with no TV and no Internet access... sincerely, someone who was bullied in HS
I agree that the punishment wasn't fitting, also he didn't really seem to have learned anything. I think he should have to apologize publicly in school which would hopefully teach him how awful what he did is to his victims.
He obviously learned bullying from his parents. Throwing everything outside is a humiliation tactic and indicates the perpetrator (his mom) is a bully. She didn't care much about her son's victim, but went over the top when he offended her, which indicates narcissism or control issues.
💯
I´m with you, but he is 17 not 13 anymore and he knows what he is doing and what could happen... So in my opinion the mother is not the AH
@@DClark-zl8xb that's total BS.
It's not even that there are other events that could rank way more stressful than your own wedding, it gets worse: as the bride and groom you ABSOLUTELY have control over how stressed out you allow yourself to get!! If you can't set aside your worries and just trust others so that you can enjoy your one day, even if that means not all will go as you planned, then don't blame others for that. Speaking as someone who was a bride last year I know that it can be done without yelling and freaking out.
Friend #1 is lovely! She didn't allow the monster bride to verbally abuse her friend. She is the kind of friend we all should have. Fellow #2 dodged a bullet.
That guy completely saw a red flag and dodged a bullet! Not only did she say he was abusive she then involved her friends and encouraged them to bombard his phone as well. She aired their dirty laundry and was meticulous, happy he stuck to his decision.
She actually is abusive one... This man really dodged a bullet - Im sure he'll find someone proper... He have good moral compas
Man, I don’t care HOW badly things at a wedding go wrong, it doesn’t give the bride free license to pop off at everyone, ESPECIALLY people who are trying to help. NTA, and I’d have walked out after being threatened to be thrown out. People make far, far too much out of weddings. #elope
P.S. I am so glad I don’t have kids.
AMEN! completely agree. When Charlotte said "this is hard" it's not. No one deserves to be spoken to like that. Hell no.
Concur!
Yes!
It also always irks me when people say "the most important day of my life." Like, so after the ceremony it's all downhill for ya? That's bleak! 🤣
@@FlagCutie ahahahahahaha! Brilliant observation! How about the day the kids are born?
Karen syndrome
When I was grounded, it wasn’t just electronics that were removed. It was ALL the things I enjoyed doing. Reading, drawing, all of it. I was allowed to clean, study or go outside in the backyard, that was IT. It drives me crazy that kids will be “grounded”, which means they can do whatever the hell they want
🙌🏿❤️
You think not allowing someone to study, read, or go outside is an appropriate punishment. Even people in jail have access to reading, going outside, and to studying for a degree.
That kid that pranked that girl........what if the girl committed suicide from the humiliation?
For the last story-are we forgetting this 17-yo boy played a cruel prank on a girl, who could potentially be traumatized from this experience?? That mom is not an A-hole and should have punished her son and made him apologize to the girl from the start, not giving him an ultimatum.
I think they are both a-holes. Her throwing a tantrum and breaking stuff is ridiculous. Him intentionally being cruel and sneaking out and feeling no remorse is unacceptable.
And the prank is posted online, forever to be reminded of the cruelty.
@@dudeorduuude5211 I think if a PARENT wants to break everything their CHILD has in THEIR house they have every right to do so. I wouldn't do it - but the problem we have with today's parents is that they are limited in what they are allowed to use to correct a child that misbehaves. There is very few things that can be done to teach a child that they sometimes have to obey their parents just to obey them and there does NOT need to be any other reason behind that. Of course mental and physical abuse is definitely outside the acceptable and is not parenting - but if the parent bought those things for that kid believe they have the right to break them - if the kid bought it with money that they earned themselves then no that should not be broken as that is just disrespect and not corrective behavior. I hated when my father broke my BB gun over his knee on Christmas day - but I learned not to point a BB gun a cat or any other animal. It wasn't the point that I wouldn't ever shoot a cat with a BB gun, it was the fact I pointed it at a living creature and in my father's eyes that was unacceptable and deserved severe consequences. If he let it go and didn't correct my behavior I may have accidentally hurt an animal and that would have be a lot worse than me losing a BB gun.
@@jnb756 Good parental modeling there dude -- raging. Are you a toxic girlfriend or something? Just sell it, give it to charity. Respect items and the money spent on it.
@@jnb756 definitely not the message you want to send your kids. Teens and kids are going to be dumb assholes sometimes. It's literally science that they can't reason and express themselves. You need to expect certain outburst and learn how to b the adult in the situation. Breaking shit is literally throwing a tantrum. There's no intelligence in trying to teach a lesson. That puts you the adult on the level of a child and thus you loose respect. Fear isn't a the tactic you need to teach. The grown adult should've handled it in a way that actually teaches him and punishes him. I have personal experience with a parent who couldn't control and express their anger like a fully functioning grown man. I lost more respect as the years went on.
Whether it’s the color, the fabric, how provocative it is, or anything else: If you expect you might have to justify your dress choice at a wedding, then don’t wear it in the first place.
Yeah, but I still find it difficult sometimes. Some cultures say that red is not allowed. Other people consider black to be inappropriate (funeral-like). If you're too fancy you're upstaging the bride. If it's too relaxed it's rude.
Then there are winter weddings, weddings outside when it's *super* hot etc.... I don't have 20 different wedding outfits. :/
so I personally stick to never white and not too flashy (like bright red). But Idk.
@@leonamay8776 Yeah it's hard sometimes, if I'm not sure I try to reach out to other guests, family etc to see what they're wearing. In this case I think he was right, his reason was rational not controlling and the friend said it has nothing to do with him?? of course it does it's his date. Your plan of never wearing white or flashy clothes sounds like the way to go👍
@@arleneclark6369 I absolutely agree, I think he was right in this case. But for example with muted red colours (some say that red is a always a huge no) or a "little black dress" with black shoes (funeral like?) and similar issues it's just not as clear cut...
@@leonamay8776 I feel like that’s a good rule to go by.
She thought that the bride wearing white was an outdated tradition? Well then what about weddings? They’re about tradition too and if she couldn’t respect the bride and groom and they’re having a traditional ceremony, then she shouldn’t have tried to go. It was not about HER, nor was it an opportunity for her to show herself off. About her? NO. A-hole? ABSOLUTELY!
“Stress isn’t an excuse to talk down to people.” Agree.
In my early 20s I wore a white dress to two weddings (not my own). I WISH someone would have told me about the law!! Looking back, I feel horrible. Luckily, I was at the back of all the festivities at both.
"I love weddings" but ends up wearing a white/off-white dress by accident? Without thinking? Nah I don't think so 100% she knew what she was doing she was ready to cause a scene there
She was trying to give her BF a hint I think - “propose to me!”
The first one- she isnt the A-hole, the bride threatened to kick her out and she called her bluff. That's not a friendship you want to keep if thats how quickly she wants to drop you when you disagree or call her out
Yes, had a friend (not during a wedding) say "You'll either do this for me or we're not friends anymore". Needless to say, we're not friends anymore.
The first story, if it was me, they would ALL be out of my life. I would've walked out. What you are telling this lady is that we should all put up with abusive behavior from terrible people. Good friend or not. I have kicked family out of my life. NO ONE DESERVES TO BE ABUSED!!!!!
I definitely agree that Mom went too far however her child didn't just break curfew... He was cruelly bullying another student and seemingly had zero remorse for that. I'd say his mom is doing a bit of a public service. (Assuming he's not like 10, and is a teen)
Yes absolutely, much agreed and well said 👍🏻
It says in the begining he was 17. He seems like a pretty bad person and I would agree with you. Throwing the stuff out the window was too much.
I have a low tolerance for lying. Sneaking out, the teen thinks that the parents are so stupid that they won't figure it out. Shame on the aunt for not backing up the parents.
Given the mom’s reactions, it makes sense that the son bullies. I’m NOT excusing his behavior at all! It seems like the chaos that thrives in his household led to the bullying. I mean, who gives their child the OPTION to apologize for doing wrong?! That’s a requirement! As the story progressed though, I could see a little more of how little they cared about doing the right thing compared to giving the impression of doing the right thing. They felt good about grounding him because that means that they are punishing him but they never addressed his motives that led to the behavior which continued by his sneaking out. As a third party bystander, it seems to me like the narcissistic parents are training up a narcissistic son and are seeking validation from others. They ALL need to do better. Just my thoughts tho, take them for what they are. 😉
I agree! The fact he wouldn't apologize to her after lying to her, then purposefully standing her up, and then taking pictures of her being stood up and circulating them around school! I can't imagine what he was saying about her to others, and the fact that the school found out about it shows it was full scale. Then he proceeds to sneak out while he's grounded and act all cool when he gets caught. He's got an issue. I think he deserved it.
But we also have to think about why he would feel that a response like his was justifiable. To the point where he wouldn't apologize and clearly doesn't respect his mother or women in general. I think the better response would've been to lock all the windows and doors and wait for the call when he showed back up. Then have a nice conversation about it.
The girl who played victim to wearing white to a wedding... run man, just run
You SHOULD walk out!
No one deserves to put up with that abuse. The bride herself was threatening to kick her out anyway.
My wedding was stress free and easy! I made it simple and fun for everyone just doing the basics! Of course getting married on friday the 13th was fun 'cause so many people were freaky about it! Celebating #29 this year!
I'm concerned with how much more the mom cared about her son sneaking out - a normal teenage thing - than she was about him humiliating and traumatizing a probably already insecure girl - a completely unacceptable bullying thing. This mom has issues, and her child's lack of empathy and basic human decency (including opting not to apologize) is even more telling.
Don't get me wrong, the bullying is by no means okay and I agree. I just as a parent now am very aware of how horrendously dangerous sneaking out is. Should've been equally made about all of it..
Sneaking out is in no way a ‘normal teenage thing.’
@@dmf1301 I'm curious, how is it not a normal teenage thing? I know for teenagers in strict or sheltered homes it's a thing. It definitely was for me and my friends when we were teens
@@8bitfae I meant that it's not 'normal' for teenagers to sneak out like the guy in the story.
You and your friends are a few people out of billions... just because you did it, doesn't mean we all did.
We certainly would not behave so selfishly and irresponsibly as to sneak out and wind up murdered in a dark parking lot somewhere (which actually happens to kids.... there was a really brutal rape/murder of two teen girls in my area when I was about 12, so the reigns were really tightened for all of us).
Besides, sneaking out is one thing, but sneaking out when you're supposed to be grounded is an entirely different thing - you're totally flouting in your parents' face that you don't respect the rules, their attempts to discipline you, or the fact that consequences have actions.
My parents' ideas of punishment wasn't really grounding - we got things taken away from us, like video games for my brother and my stereo for me, no television, no desert, that type of thing. But flouting the rules ONCE to end up punished was one thing... flouting the punishment itself would have landed us in a whole lot more trouble!
I guess kids in my school were raised to have some basic respect for rules and discipline. Or, maybe it was because we didn't want to be brutalized like those girls were just for the not really that much fun of sneaking out for the heck of it.
Sneaking out is not a normal thing for kids........wow, just wowwwwwww
As a parent.... I'm 💯 behind that mother!!!! Hell yeah! Serves him right!!! 🤣🤣🤣
Exactly, or the kid will just keep doing it because consequence isn’t harsh enough. These are the kids that take a bad path if they aren’t corrected early on. (Or end up on the show “48.”)
@@SeriousSara1 my daughter is 22 and moved out but she knows I'd do this NOW if she behaved like that!
@@Vixxie475 and I bet she got a good head on her shoulders too
@@Vixxie475 i hope she doesn't think that.
If I thought my mother would feel comfortable coming into my home and trashing my stuff, I would cut her the hell out of my life.
@@SeriousSara1 she's a school teacher so i must have done something right!!! 🤣
No way, that kid is permanent trouble.
I’m rewatching your AITA vids and for the last one.. my Mom used to take my whole door off and I’d have to sleep with everyone passing my bedroom to get to the bathroom. Never will I ever do that to my child, it’s traumatising. I had no privacy
the mom (and husband) who tossed their teenage boys stuff out the window: how did everyone miss that his "prank" - just another word for BULLYING- was seemingly ignored? He refused to apologize and then lied to his parents and broke his grounding. I think they went a little too far, but perhaps she saw it as a reflection of the "prank" he pulled? How did he remove the security screen? Call the company and have them reinforce it, ground him for a Month for both lying and leaving when grounded, take all electronic toys/phone away, and move the computer to a family area. That way he can only use it for school and nothing else. Tell him he now has to apologize publicly to the girl he humiliated...on purpose. Pride doesn't come into it; what about her feelings? He had no problem humiliating her in front of the entire school; he should apologize in the same forum. I'd also look into a good counselor as he obviously has some issues and feels entitled to Bully other kids. Has he done this in past?
Yes! I don't get why people are like "oh he doesn't have to apologize we Don't want to hurt his pride" like, shut up.
He could hurt his victims pride just allright and humiliate her, he should humble himself and apologize profusely.
Also, they let him not agree to write a letter, where you can write literally anything you don't even have to believe it and still he refused? How do they not see a problem here?
@@Scarlett.Granger they don't see the problem because they're a major component of the problem and obviously they are oblivious to how badly they're ruining their son.
When my son was younger, he kept running over the dogs with this dragon walker toy that he was too big for. He was old enough to know better, but no punishment worked. I finally threw the damn thing into the woods. He never hurt the dogs again. I figured it was better than letting the dogs teach him a lesson.
@speedierllama The problem is that these days most kids don’t move out when they turn 18. He needs to learn that to live under his parents roof he needs to respect their authority.
@speedierllama according to the census bureau 58% of children 18-24 live at home. It is becoming more common than you might think. One reason for that is the difficulty and expense of setting up and maintaining a household. Many of those children are working at lower wage jobs and saving for first/last/security deposit, as well as for transportation.
And about the last story, I agree with some of the comments. The kid probably didn't learn a valuable lesson. I think letting him choose between staying in his room and the apology was the first mistake. He humiliated another person, didn't feel remorse and basically got away with it. They should have made him apologize in person, in front of his friends, because that would have hurt his ego, in his mind that would have been humiliating, and that's exactly what you're looking for, that he can feel what the other kid felt (I know in reality it's not the same, but for teenagers it's a big deal, he would appear to be weak).
Completely agree. The sneaking out part was secondary. Being intentionally cruel is setting him up for a life of being an a-hole. Apologizing face to face with witnesses.
He’s on the road to be an adult asshole. Someone that will end up in jail/other legal trouble because he thinks he can do whatever he likes and rules and laws are for other people.
Too right; an apology for bad behavior is not the punishment. It's a corrective action, to be followed by a punishment. He absolutely should have been made to apologize in addition to the grounding. Having to apologize for the original offense as punishment for the second offense is just reinforcing the idea that empty apologies are consequences rather than basic good human behavior.
This one really bothered me. It was pure bullying behavior, not a simple prank. There should have been a grounding for sure and a real one with privileges taken away, but also a discussion on why this wasn't ok. How that kind of behavior can really harm another and how unkind and unfair it is to make someone feel like that. Disappointing all around.
absolutely agree. This isn't a small issue, these pranks ruin kids lives and leave them confidence issues. A better thought out punishment would have done. I'm not about punishing people but for doing mean things to others clearly shows they don't care for others or how others view them unless it is "cool" among friends and people "lower than them", they need to understand it is not okay. Finding something effective, and telling them why it's not something they should do, that doesn't cross the line of abuse, being an asshole should have really been thought out, or implemented early throughout their life so they understand the damage this stuff causes to others.
Got I love watching your videos on weddings, bridezillas, etc because it makes me remember how happy I am that my husband and I eloped.
It’s so fascinating to watch the white dress weirdness play out, especially considering my wedding dress wasn’t white and I encouraged all the people who wanted to wear a dress to the wedding to wear the same color as me or my husband so we’d all match 😂 cause my husband and I both picked a color for the wedding theme and everyone else’s was free to wear what they want as long as it matched.
Let me say this : even if it was my own Twin sister and she treated my friend that way after she helped her for free. I would walk right out of there and never speak to her again.
That girl was not wrong . Bride or not you have to RESPECT people.
Third one : that jerk is a bully. His aunt is worried about his feelings more than the feelings of that poor girl . Also no that's not how children should act. And it's the parents job to educate them even if I do think the mom lost her $hit
You said it: it’s the parents job to educate them.
How well do you think that education is going with a toxic mother like his? Not very well. His mother has modeled toxic nastiness to him for his entire life. People don’t just all the sudden decide to do something like she did after having been a perfect parent for 17 years. His actions are the consequence of her parenting. I’m not saying what he did was in any way ok. But we should be concerned for both children involved. Both of them were failed by this mother. Just remember that there’s usually a reason ppl are bullies. It’s not generally just that they have a black soul and are terrible people. We just got one example of what this mother did. Think about years of punishments that are either too weak or WAY WAY too severe. You never know which mom you’re going to get. You never know what you’re allowed to do because she’s so inconsistent with her behavior. That’s a scary way to grow up. Just because a kid isn’t covered in bruises doesn’t mean they aren’t abused. Let me be clear, this child is abused.
@@nenamichelle There is a reason he is a bully and shocker its because he's being raised by a bully.
this! I'm so tired of people acting like just because they're getting married they should be able to treat people like crap, like no its called being a decent person who name calling like that shouldn't even be a reaction
It's a definite parental failure. In the first place, it should have been an apology AND 3 weeks grounded. Grounded without devices. If he still sneaked out through the window, then you nail the window shut and restart the countdown on the 3 weeks. The aunt also needs a priority check.
Actions have consequences, or at least they should.
I'm sick of everyone avoiding all consequences nowadays.
@@ireallyreallyhategoogle exactly
LOL-when my nephew would complain to me about being punished by my sister for "nothing" I knew there was more to the story and would always get what really went down from her.
I know right? If I complained to my aunt, she’d probably chastise me worse then my mom did. “We’ll what the h&(l did you do to deserve it?” Would be the first thing out of her mouth , lol
Sorry, wrong thread.
Exactly!!
Teen age bully has a bully for a mother. Shocking.
In the middle of these videos Charlotte whispers "subscribe" at the end of the video Charlotte screams "SUBSCRIBE". I love it. She's so nutty, zany and silly and I love it.
I soooooo would have walked out too. And that "I'll save you the trouble" line is just fantastic!
The second story made me appreciate Nigerian weddings more. The wedding usually has different fabrics to show harmony. The bridesmaids would have their fabric, the groom and bride will have their's, the brides parents had their's, grooms parent's, the family of both sides had their's, and the friends attending had their's.
Someone is usually placed in charge of sourcing the fabrics, taking idea from the colours the couple want for the theme of the wedding, then a supplier is contacted. So if you were confused on what to wear, you could just purchase the fabric from the person in charge and sew whatever you want widdit. Its usually called "aso ebi"
And when I say "purchase", its not a profit thing. It allows you to easily identify who is what from which side of the family and just makes the whole ambience look really pretty.
This! I literally thought of this during that second story and how we never even really bother about the white thing because even if you wear white the style will be so different from the bride's dress that no one will even notice , e.g it could be Ankara or lace. And most times even bride's or groom parents wear white asoebi to distinguish them or make them stand out
@@deinmakalio3319 yep yep. And more often, there are weddings where the asoebi is actually white. I even found my self sewing a white lace dress cuz my friend's wedding required we, her classmates to wear white and I had none. Well, its part of white culture so, more strength to them I guess.
That honestly sounds super dope.
Wow I didn’t know that. That’s awesome!!
This sounds amazing. Relevance behind the choices and a far more interesting and one of a kind look.
To the parents of the kid who bullied and shamed other kids, hats off to you. You are a GOAT. Bet he won’t try that again. Ask any parent who has lost a child to suicide…. It is a huge deal to have an apology and know there were severe consequences
I planned my whole wedding all by myself using a bride book and I don’t remember being stressed too much. It was a great wedding and people gushed about the reception for years after. Guess I’m tough as nails - lol 💪🏼
My aunt wore a white dress to my cousin’s (her son) wedding. I told her when we were getting ready why on earth was she doing that - she told me it wasn’t white, it was ecru. I told her that’s pretty much the same. She pretended like she didn’t hear me.
I had so much secondhand embarrassment from this, it still hurts. I love her but this was such an attention seeking shit move.
Throw iced coffee, then you can counter "now it coffee colored"
@@melrobertson2743 omg this has made my day and it's only 3.22am
Especially when its the mother of the groom, it always makes me think the woman has fantasies of marrying her son. Freud would be pleased to see his theories are still being represented in 2022. Lol
When I got married, I didn’t even notice what anyone else was wearing. My sister was wearing a white jacket over her dress, didn’t notice on the day. Don’t care. We had 1 attendant each. I can’t imagine being that high maintenance. That said, my son is getting married in June. The wedding is ridiculously large and expensive. It’s 250 people and there are events over 3 days. The worst part will be that I have to do a presentation with my ex husband that I don’t speak to. And I’m in charge of my sister who doesn’t live in town. She’s already complaining and turning down every option for stuff to do. 😂
@@LoziPop I almost wish now I would have the chance to be in a situation where the groom’s mother was trying to wear white to the wedding so I could accuse her of wanting to sleep with her son and just say to her every word, “ok, son-fucker”
As someone with anxiety, I agree with her that no matter how stressed you are you can't snap at others. As an abuse survivor, I hate people that throw the A word around in the context of the second one. Can't respond to third one because my parents were hitters and I'm still in therapy so I don't have context.
Thank you for this post and for your honest transparency! My parents were also hitters so I understand the need for therapy in that area. And I hope your therapist has told you (and more importantly that you know) that their hitting was about their shortcomings and not yours. I mean, kids are gonna mess up, (they’ve never done this before!) but that doesn’t mean they should be struck for it.
I am coming out of a marriage that, while not physically abusive, was mentally and emotionally abusive. And she had the nerve to accuse me of abuse for not being able to handle her manipulation without losing my temper. Voicing my displeasure/disagreement(regardless of tone) was usually classified as abuse. I am in therapy myself so I can respond better, identify issues/concerns quicker/clearer, and learn how to have a healthy relationship. I’m far too old to have never had one.
Sending you prayers, hugs, and good therapy vibes from San Antonio.
My egg donor turned into a hitter after she married my pos stepfather and I thank God every day that my grandmother noticed the injuries and bruises and didn't just take my egg donor's word for what happened, so I was removed from my situation. I am still going through therapy for that and other issues that I have, (bipolar, anxiety, insomnia), so I am praying success for both of y'all! Best wishes from Southeastern Virginia❤💙
@@tianamariee6287 I have no words. Thank God for grandma tho! Keep up the therapy. Maybe we should start a Miss Charlotte potato support group for those of us who have been boiled, baked, and/or mashed?
@@davidguidry657 Prayers, hugs, and good vibes back from Tampa, FL. My therapist is a fantastic lady who reminds me on the regular when I slide back into thinking it was my fault. I'm sorry that the person you found outside your family wasn't a good person. While my first boyfriend hit me once we broke up when we're 18 and headed to separate colleges and while their I met my husband who is a gentle kind man. So I've been blessed with a great partner even if all three of my parental units were garbage people.
I hope you find a healthy partnership someday.
@@tianamariee6287 Thank God for your Grandma. I miss mine every day. She's been dead for more than 20 years now, she died when I was 16. Bless yours for protecting you. Mine was the only one that loved me as I was.
Fellow bipolar, anxiety and insomnia sufferer hugs. May you find treatment and healing.
I would have been like "bride, you are not allowed to bully and name-calling people regardless of how stressed you are. Either your abusive behavior stops or we are done." Then walked out if she continued after the warning. She wanna act like a child, she will be treated like one.
For bully teenager: What gives her sister the right to intervene with her parenting of her 17 year who needed some serious correction for his behaviour? The 17 year old was testing his boundaries as to whether or not his parents had the right to make the rules and expectations for their house - not his. As all he experienced was consequences for his behaviour and he showed no remorse for repeatedly lying and deceiving his parents, he needed a course correction.
In less than a year every single decision that young man makes will be on him and doing some of the behaviours he was doing could end up in some very poor outcomes for him as an adult. In essence the consequences he experienced were some of the last "reasonably mild" the parents could provide to help the 17 year old check himself and his attitude and based on his behaviours and responses to the consequences....he needed the help. He was never in danger nor abused in any way. Tossing all the furniture etc out of the second floor wind is extreme, but the kid just wasn't getting it or taking ownership of anything.
The mom was NTA.
🙌🏿🙌🏿🙌🏿🙌🏿🙌🏿🙌🏿
Never subject yourself to abusive people, even if it's their wedding day. End that friendship and walk away.
There's a reason this woman went from 9 friends (who were supposedly close enough to be bridesmaids?) to 3 in a few years... being stressed sometimes make you act like a jerk, but as soon as so you escalate to insulting and name-calling, don't be surprised when people cut you off.
Why did they give the kid the OPTION to apologize? Absolutely not, that poor kid who was bullied DESERVES AN APOLOGY.
My whole wedding was stressful. Oct 23, nearly summer in Queensland . Was 30c degrees.
I had a deep cough, my hair dresser went on the Friday , (day before my wedding.) the hairdresser who did my hair wouldn’t fix it up.
My DJ made a nasty joke about our first dress. The bridesmaid dresses ended up being the colour I hated but that’s what they wanted . My hen’s night was at hungry jacks coz my sister couldn’t be bothered planning anything. And so much more 😂😂😂😂😂
IDK, I don't necessarily agree that the mom throwing the son's stuff out of the window is TA. He's 17 not 7. He played a cruel prank on a classmate and didn't want to write an apology letter and chose the grounding instead. He was grounded for 3 weeks and while it sounds like he got to keep his gaming consoles, it seems like he was grounded more from seeing friends and socializing. Instead of staying in his room, he was probably sneaking out over the course of the whole grounding even though it's the punishment HE chose. So not only was he not adhering to the punishment he picked for himself, he violated the parents' trust as well. I'd have regrounded him and made him spend the grounding sitting in the living room or doing his homework at the kitchen table based on that violation of trust.
He probably was sneaking out to continue the cruel prank.
I agree. Did the aunt get the full story of just what the kid did in the first place? His punishment did not fit the crime and to still have the audacity to disrespect his parents with his actions warrants a tougher punishment. Sometimes you need to be childish to teach your kids that being childish can really hurt someone. If you handle everything maturely, they may never understand the full scope of the damage done by immature behavior.
Also, did he buy those things or did the parents/family? It’s a privilege that he gets those things in the first place, so to simply have them removed from room and possibly broken is not so much a violation of his property as it is to rescind those privileges. I have family that wouldn’t even give back the bed if someone had done something so cruel to another person without having to apologize. Seventeen is old enough to feel the real weight of the consequences of your actions.
If my sister, on her wedding day, could deal wth her bipolar mother going through a manic episode these bridezillas should be able to hold it together. I felt so bad for my sister going through a stressful day while trying to deal with someone she loves dearly erratic behavior. Fwiw, Mom is much better now.
I’m sorry that happened. I’m bipolar 2 so my manic episodes aren’t extreme. My son is getting married in June and I think I’ll just take some Valium on the day so I don’t just jibber jabber 1000 miles per hour to strangers while over sharing.
@@debshaw680 Fellow type 2 here. Try not to drink on the wedding too, for some of us, it can trigger mania or it can make it worse. Or drink cocktails with less alcohol than the normal and drink two soft drinks for every alcoholic one. I wouldn't take the Valium unless I was starting to feel agitated or any symptoms of hypomania, but take it with you.
if she chose to deal with that, that's her call. definitely doesn't mean she had to though, or that others have to deal with anything remotely similar. I dealt with my mother's ups and downs in the past too but I'd never say that's reason for anyone else to put up with something like that. glad your mother is better now.
@@c_________ what she means is the bride didn't lose it on her wedding day and lash out at people because her mother was having a hard time.
Although I definitely wouldn't say that just because the original posters sister could hold it together means that everyone else should be able to as well.
Some people break down, they get overwhelmed and they can't handle the stress. The difference is though oh, if you know that you can't handle it, and you start snapping at people, you say some things you regret, you should apologize. You should be aware of your shortcomings and compensate for them, you should not stick your mother on whoever you don't like after the wedding.
Bipolar 1 with seasonal pattern, I understand. I know what a journey it is so I’m glad your mother is better now and I’m assuming taking her medication 😊
How someone treats you under a high stress situation says everything about their character.
Good on the bridesmaid for walking out. She not only was sticking up for herself but also sticking up for another friend that was being crapped on.
First story : NTA. Just finally someone with great boundaries who doesn't tolerate any kind of abuse. I respect that. Because it stops the enabling culture of " bUT tHis is my DAy..."
I'm pretty sure I'd leave too. Why should I suck up to insults?
The first story hits home for me, I helped a friend plan every part of her wedding, she was difficult, entitled, and passive-aggressive. She continuously disrespected all of us who volunteered to help make her day beautiful and it was. However, at the reception, she came to our table and we told her it was ok we would come to her and she flipped! She berated me in front of the entire reception (which included our co-workers) and I kinda blacked out. My best friend was there and she pulled me out of that place, we both left and came back after everything was over so we could collect the loaned decor, etc. Suffice to say I ended that friendship, it was totally one-sided.
Had a similar situation. My friend was getting married, knew I have terrible anxiety and agoraphobia but guilted me, tears included into being her Matron of honor. She assured me I wouldn’t have to do a bridal shower as she did not want one but the fiancé’s friends made such a huge deal that, again, got guilted into a shower at my expense, single mother, 3 kids, lowish income. She is an attorney. Then at the reception, followed the crowd around for pictures but none were taken with me in them. AFTERWARDS, as I was cleaning up and gathering rentals to be returned by me, she runs up to me with the photographer. I said no thank you. Tired. Was overwhelmed by my having to stay till the very end. And after all that, her snooty husband said her friends were beneath their status and cut off all communication!!
@@cynthiamccain2676 wow that’s awful so sorry you had such a terrible ordeal.
I’m confused. She came to your table and what caused her to freak out? That you would come to her? At her table? I don’t get it.
Yeah Im confused about her coming to your table and you going to hers, can you clarify what she flipped out about?
La primera es una bridezilla, puede estar nerviosa pero ser educada, no una arpía maleducada, así que NTAH
El segundo él tiene razón, si con una tontería así ya dice que es abusivo no quiero pensar con una discusión real por algo importante. Así que NTAH
El tercero, para mí, NTAH. El hijo es un abusón, por su orgullo a decidido estar castigado(esto es una consecuencia por sus actos) y a traicionado la confianza de su padre, que pensaba que estaba en su cuarto, así que sí, deshacerse de sus cosas no es mala idea(y tirarlas por la ventana es muy original), como consecuencia a la violación de su castigo y la pérdida de la confianza de su padre
Además, NO vale eso de son cosas de niños, hay que educar y hacer ver que nuestros actos tienen consecuencias, si siempre tenemos por excusa que son cosas que hacen los niños así no se aprende a ser responsable y se repiten los mismos errores ya que no a pasado nada
That trick was trying to be messy!!!! NTAHOLE !!!! You deserve better!!!!🎉🎉😂❤
2:18 I think the bridesmaid had every right to walk out of the wedding tbh. She did everything within her power to help the bride including a FREE hairstylist at the last minute, yet the bride still had the nerve to insult her? Not only that but she also threatened to kick her out of the wedding party. Stressed or not, that’s messed up of her to do. OP is absolutely NTA.
The guy "pranking" a girl - that's bullying and harrassment, not a teenage joke. Maybe if he'd been properly educated, none of this had happened.
It is CRUEL to do that...as someone who got asked out as a dare, it leaves scars inside that are quite ugly
I think they finally tried to educate him when they threw his stuff out the window. It would have made him accountable. I support that actually. And yes, he was a bully
He's been raised with a sense of entitlement that will make him a shitty human being.
@@sassysarina9718 the stuff out the window was a punishment for sneaking out, not for the original offense. The takeaway will be to not get caught next time.
And breaking stuff isnt really a great parenting technique, it just teaches kids to not get attached to personal possessions.
@@NicknotNak umm, why would people need to be attached to personal possessions? Like what is good about that? He deserved having his stuff broken because he most likely left that girl more broken than his hurt over his stuff. I just wish his parents would help him understand that. They really messed up on going easy on him, if they always ground him with all his fun stuff in the room I can see how ineffective their parenting is ( they are basically raise a spoiled brat)
In the case of the runaway bridesmaid, I understand getting snippy when you're stressed but words have consequences (even if it's your wedding). I might have sucked it up for the wedding but I would be totally done talking to that bride ever again. However, once she started being mean to the person who generously tried to save her hair, I'd have to say something. And once somebody says "if you don't like it leave" I see that as an open exit. if anything, you could say she was removing stress from the bride by leaving. She did it to be helpful.
First story: NTA. The minute she disrespected the other friend who was doing her a favor -- who didn't know her from Adam-- OP should have walked out. Bridezilla could go kick rocks! And so can her boyfriend for not having OP's back!
12:03 this is exactly why my mom didn’t let us have electronics in our rooms. She didn’t want us to be hermits.
For the first one, I think we’re forgetting that 5 of the original 9 bridesmaids had already fallen out with the bride by the day of the wedding. The friend is certainly not the AH here and it sounds like the bride has some serious issues with maintaining friends and relationships with people in general
1st AITA - Good for her. Standing up for herself, her friend and common courtesy.
No one should stay anywhere they don't feel appreciated.
The first one….oh my gosh, damn right she should have walked out. There is no excuse for treating people like shit!
For the teenage bully: What the parents did was a bit extra. When I would get in trouble, I would be forced to give up all electronics for an x amount of time. And if I kept getting in trouble during punishment, that time extended.
He learned how to be a bully from his parents
The one with the mom throwing her kids stuff out the window... I can't believe she gave him an option that didn't include an apology. Apologies are required, especially for that kind of behavior.
I’m glad the guy in the changing dress request story broke up with that girl because if she responds to being asked to do one simple thing by crying abuse, she either has serious issues she needs to work out (If that’s the case, I hope she gets the help she needs) or she’s one of those people who twists everything to make themselves the victim. You need to cut the perpetual victims out of your life because otherwise you’ll wear yourself out trying to “prove you’re a good person” when they make it increasingly impossible to do so. People like that get exposed because they cry on people’s shoulders and then attack those same people, causing them to realize, “If he/she lied about me, maybe he/she lied about those other people too!”
This
I’m a little concerned that it might be both! I know that we only got his side of it but it does seem like she has serious issues she needs to work out AND may be someone who twists things to play the victim. I am just getting out of a marriage from someone like that so I am eyeball deep in therapy now so I don’t fall victim to it again or worse perpetrate it myself. I hope the girl gets help to see if it’s one or the other or both.
And especially because it was his colleague's wedding, not best friend's wedding or cousin, etc that he'd want to err on the side of caution and not rock the boat seeing as he probably only knows those people on a professional level. Like it's a big difference between professional friendships and dudes you've known since HS/college. Even the fact that he used the word colleague and not co-worker tells me he's in a very professional career where he probably wants to be taken seriously. Good on him for even considering that it would be tacky and didn't let her bully him into taking her anyway. And I'm sorry, but there is no timeline where this chick didn't know wearing a white dress to someone else's wedding was a big NO. Then calling him abusive??? Ummm, no. Even if it had been a different color but maybe a little too revealing or extra showy, he wouldn't be out of line asking her to change. It's not about her. Like if I'm going to a dinner w/ my husband for his work, I'm going to dress different than I would if we were just going out to dinner with our good friends. There is such a thing as dress etiquette. That she went from attention seeker (wearing white in the first place) and then calling him an abuser, shows me right there that she's immature and doesn't care about his feelings. Glad he ended it. It was not going to work out well for him if he stayed.
@@kristamarie6104 I need friends like you in my life! 😉
@@davidguidry657 Try not to forget that there are MANY MANY lovely women in this world; your last was just not one of them. Sorry for what stress she caused you. Please keep her flaws on HER doorstep and not on the women to follow in your life. Cheers!
The woman that threw her sons "stuff" in the back yard: I do not think she was the a*hole. The boy was 17 years old, he took the 3 weeks being grounded instead of apologizing for his cruel prank. Being 17 years old, he understood "grounding" meant not sneaking out of his bedroom at night, but he did anyway, showing a total disregard for consequences for his actions. Apparently, tossing his "stuff" in the back yard made him realize better there are consequences for actions and some actions carry more severe consequences.
For the hair stylist bridesmaid: You are NTA. I would have messed up the other bridesmaids hair on the way out.
I’m glad the bridesmaid left the 1st bride. The bride should have been effing GRATEFUL that the bridesmaid found and offered her hair stylist for her. She offered a more than kind SOLUTION to help the bride from freaking out. Instead the bride chose violence and nuclear hissy fit and threatening the kick out the bridesmaid. NEVER accept abuse.there is NO SUCKING IT UP.
8:12 omg!!! That is EXACTLY what I was thinking!!
She wanted to wear white because she wanted him to see her as “bridal.”
Some women think that attending a wedding with a man is an opportunity to plant seeds of marriage or broach the subject.
It can be really hit-and-miss.
Some men do think that way. “Man, everyone is getting settled down. I should too… oh she’s nice, everyone likes her. Maybe we should take things to the next level.”
Other guys can be like, “Nope. This is too much. Too serious. I’m not ready. That guy’s a sucker.”
Either way, someone else’s wedding is not the time to make life altering decisions. Especially with an open bar right around the corner.
OMG! Agreed, but here's the problem with this, it can potentially backfire and scare him off if he's not ready for that kind of commitment especially so early in the relationship. Just like holding a baby in front of him and looking so natural at it. Although not my intent, I really love babies and holding them, and would I have wanted one at the time, yes, but I was in NO WAY trying to plant any seeds in my ex's head, but when I was in my mid 20s, I had a friend who recently had a baby and she brought her to church and was showing her to everyone. She asked me if I wanted to hold her and of course I said absolutely! She's soo adorable! So I was holding her for a few minutes and again I wasn't really paying attention to my bf at the time's response or that he was watching me with the child, I assumed he was probably chatting with other people. But because of all of past my babysitting experience and I'm just naturally maternal, I guess holding the baby looked way to natural for his comfort and broke up with me that week. I was really really hurt by it because he never really told me the real reason, just seemed like a lame excuse and he was partly to blame if that truly was his reason but I digress, he also did it in the most wimpy way possible through email... rather than like a real man in person. But thinking back I wonder if he saw me holding the baby and assumed that I wanted to have kids and he wasn't ready for that, but I mean again a conversation about his concern would have been nice and appreciated, so I dodged a bullet! Child or no child, wedding or no wedding, he was clearly too immature to be in a relationship.
First story: NTA
Second story: NTA
Third story: Everyone sucks! The apology letter should have been bare minimum. Home punishment should have removed all "fun" electronic devices from the room, with the computer for homework monitored as best as possible, and maybe shut the internet down at bedtime. Second offense of sneaking out? Extension of punishment with check ins required hourly, and take away the "cool clothes" and leave him with basic jeans, shirt, socks, and shoes (if he's into that kind of thing). Frankly in this situation, family ounseling might be in order since at 17 one could be expect to know the difference between wrong and right, and something is causing the boy to participate in bullying.
Honestly, if you feel the need to punish a 17 year old, it just means you have already lost in the parenting. You really need to have their morals in shape much sooner than that. The older they get, the less influence anything you do has. At this point, punishments, and especially something extremely stupid like this, will just ruin future relationship.
@@indigoeye3874 he’s still young enough to live under their roof. If he can’t behave like an OK person to his peers or family it should have consequenses. Some kids are harder than others to raise. I think the parents were right to be clear where their boundaries go and let him know.
Seriously!
And I don't get the point of spending all day destroying your kids room just so you have to clean it all up again.
Fuck that
That kid should have been made to apologize right from the start. Maybe go speak with her parents, even. They need to humanize that girl to the bully so he thinks twice about doing it again.
Even better, remove the shoes so he doesn’t feel like sneaking out barefoot lol
@@indigoeye3874 Try saying that to a Latino mom. She'll ground you, too. 😅🙈
My parents would take away my books if I did something wrong.
The thing about the first bride, she wasn’t only being mean to the bridesmaid by whom she was saved the trouble of kicking her out…. She was being mean to the woman who she got to come in as a last-minute favor to do her hair.
Staying would have excused her behavior towards the friend who came to do her hair.
I got married 3 weeks ago, and I can tell you from first hand experience that your wedding day should NOT be stressful! If you are with the right person and surrounding by people who genuinely have your best interests at heart, stress should not be an issue. Wedding planning is a whole other issue, but my wedding day was so stress free and I’m so grateful!
I just got married a month ago, and I was not stressed at all, in fact, I was repeatedly told how calm and serene I was the entire time. Wedding stress is no excuse to treat people horribly.
That first story: If you kick someone out and you can't play the victim when they leave. She was literally told to leave.
And also the girl who left the wedding was probably really embarrassed that the bride was being very rude to the friend that the bridesmaid had asked to help do the bride’s hair. If the bride hadn’t been rude to the bridesmaid’s friend, this may not have happened. You reap what you sow.
As a parent of a teenager I find removing power cords (phone, playstation, etc.) is very effective they still see the item but the knowledge that it cannot be used and the privledge must be earned back is a really good learning tool. Also with sneeking out depending on the age (at some ages its usually classed as being a run away) calling the cops to report them missing can be an eye opener for a child sneaking out because technically yeah you sneak out mom and dad dont know where you are as far as they are concerned you're missing.
Praise to the guy who RESPECTFULLY asked his gf at the time to change her dress. He’s most certainly NOT the a-hole