I Can't Escape From Tarkov

Поделиться
HTML-код
  • Опубликовано: 29 окт 2024

Комментарии • 805

  • @AquaFPS
    @AquaFPS 4 года назад +5011

    i worked so hard to get my junkbox... watching you buy one and delete it really destroyed my self esteem.

    • @auto--
      @auto-- 4 года назад +288

      You can’t destroy what never existed

    • @nathanparks4194
      @nathanparks4194 4 года назад +96

      AquaFPS ngl hes flexin too hard for you, nerd

    • @sliceofham3737
      @sliceofham3737 4 года назад +15

      Alright

    • @stdshurt7972
      @stdshurt7972 4 года назад +21

      It's ok just go play some rust it will make everything worse buddy...

    • @rickwad842
      @rickwad842 4 года назад +6

      What self esteem

  • @edguillotine7704
    @edguillotine7704 4 года назад +1156

    >"give me the gun"
    No
    >barrel to mouth
    >"I'm taking the gun
    >gets gun
    *Art of the Deal*

  • @brybones7806
    @brybones7806 4 года назад +724

    The absolute destruction and pain in your voice after you discarded that scav box was that of a broken man.

  • @throwaway.mp4931
    @throwaway.mp4931 4 года назад +213

    8:15 really did something to my brain

  • @psychopunk8817
    @psychopunk8817 4 года назад +1079

    Good'ol Sam out here dressing like a classy russian gopnik.

    • @evgenyreshetnikov3483
      @evgenyreshetnikov3483 4 года назад +12

      "I am walking out with that shotgun" - Yeah, sounds about right.

    • @loveshork77
      @loveshork77 4 года назад +6

      yaa gopnik here and i approve sam's adidas suit

    • @angsern8455
      @angsern8455 4 года назад

      On vacation

    • @psychopunk8817
      @psychopunk8817 4 года назад +1

      @sa oef Yeah I know it's a oxymoron

  • @sadtoast6122
    @sadtoast6122 4 года назад +334

    Mayonnaise?
    Aww yes Slav pudding

  • @thiefpolska
    @thiefpolska 4 года назад +1895

    You could've called this video "I can't Escape From Tarkov". What a waste

  • @marcusbeattie6086
    @marcusbeattie6086 4 года назад +711

    I just can't imagine this man as a father.

    • @ThatGuy-zu8hm
      @ThatGuy-zu8hm 4 года назад +10

      Imagine*

    • @dudeman7738
      @dudeman7738 4 года назад +75

      It give me hope to me and all man babys all over the world that we can one day trick a women of our own into holding thy seed.

    • @tachanka1283
      @tachanka1283 4 года назад +23

      With that logic I can’t imagine the past 20 years generations being parents, we laugh at the letter 🅱️ for comedic pleasure

    • @marcusbeattie6086
      @marcusbeattie6086 4 года назад

      @@tachanka1283 true

    • @oneshotrobb7272
      @oneshotrobb7272 4 года назад

      @@tachanka1283 we?

  • @toob46
    @toob46 4 года назад +47

    9:39 when Sam yelled I got flashbacks to that Minecraft video when Steve yelled at somebody to get out of his house.

  • @bertvsrob
    @bertvsrob 4 года назад +95

    "I hit him at least twice with the hatchet - EVERYBODY WAS GETTING A TASTE!" - World Eater Legionary

  • @JoaoLucas-se7vz
    @JoaoLucas-se7vz 4 года назад +950

    Sam spent 1 million just to flex and it clashed with his inner jew.

    • @GeneralSam
      @GeneralSam  4 года назад +436

      It did kinda hurt

    • @Fabianwew
      @Fabianwew 4 года назад +8

      How much was that worth. Did he pay real money for the currency or is it all gained by gameplay.

    • @gunship0995
      @gunship0995 4 года назад +32

      @@Fabianwew gameplay. But 1 Million roubles is hard to grind.

    • @dudeman7738
      @dudeman7738 4 года назад +44

      @@Fabianwew Yeah he spent a real million dollars and discarded it.

    • @Fabianwew
      @Fabianwew 4 года назад +11

      @@dudeman7738 Not what I meant you fool. I was wondering if it was bought like shark cards I GTA.

  • @crayonchomper1180
    @crayonchomper1180 4 года назад +34

    there is literally a "GG EZ" scav voice line and I find that hillarious

  • @lionlike5856
    @lionlike5856 4 года назад +251

    Sam to Abby Shapiro: eat the whole mayonnaise.

    • @caesarvalorvmsheevpalpatin8755
      @caesarvalorvmsheevpalpatin8755 4 года назад +16

      I'd love to give my mayonnaise to abby shapiro

    • @____-ju6mx
      @____-ju6mx 4 года назад +1

      i still cannot believe that out of all people ben shapiro has a really hot sister who also happens to have a fuckton of leaked nude #blessed

    • @AirsoftJunkie
      @AirsoftJunkie 4 года назад +1

      @@____-ju6mx UMass Rachel isn't Abby.

    • @ironduke5058
      @ironduke5058 4 года назад

      @@____-ju6mx Damn you gotta hand out the sauce,you can't just leave the boys hanging like that.
      At least give her name

    • @____-ju6mx
      @____-ju6mx 4 года назад +2

      Iron Duke it’s abigail shapiro and you literally find the nudes on google images
      www.google.com/search?q=abby+shapiro+nudes&client=firefox-b-m&prmd=inv&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwiMlZrG___lAhWcwcQBHdcmDKAQ_AUoAXoECAwQAQ&biw=375&bih=545 enjoy my nigga

  • @rickwad842
    @rickwad842 4 года назад +57

    Honestly thought this was Aqua when i first clicked. Pleasantly surprised

  • @payupright
    @payupright 4 года назад +3

    Sam is one of the only people on RUclipsrs that makes his ads entertaining an entertaining segment of the video. Thank you sir.

  • @Overlord99762
    @Overlord99762 4 года назад +12

    1:23 I didn't know I was watching Life of Boris

  • @Zombie-tf3xj
    @Zombie-tf3xj 4 года назад +42

    I like that Jippy released new music

    • @GeneralSam
      @GeneralSam  4 года назад +29

      Yeah he holds onto it for a while and makes BIG DUMP

    • @Zombie-tf3xj
      @Zombie-tf3xj 4 года назад +1

      Shits lit af

  • @TastyTacoN1nja
    @TastyTacoN1nja 4 года назад +48

    2:47 did Sam just look at his youtube demographics and pander to us?

  • @nylonprotest7745
    @nylonprotest7745 4 года назад +46

    I love how every RUclipsr is suddenly going "look, I know Nord VPN got hacked" really tickles me pink

    • @UncleTwoTimez
      @UncleTwoTimez 4 года назад +5

      Would you prefer they pretended it didn't happen?

    • @nylonprotest7745
      @nylonprotest7745 4 года назад +16

      @@UncleTwoTimez no the joke is it's super obvious it's part of the talking points that nord gives them for their sponsorship

    • @knight1706
      @knight1706 4 года назад +4

      You clearly didn’t watch more than 2 seconds into the segment you cancer patient

    • @nylonprotest7745
      @nylonprotest7745 4 года назад +7

      @@knight1706 What???

  • @THElegoBUILDER5825
    @THElegoBUILDER5825 4 года назад +80

    Tarkov: One of the many reasons my wife left me, a book by General Sam

  • @champo976
    @champo976 3 года назад +10

    "Nah man I dont need a 'elmet I can just cup me hands over muy head" such an underrated line

  • @wyattbender6512
    @wyattbender6512 4 года назад +114

    Last time I came this early I had to pay Steve's mom double

  • @alegit123456
    @alegit123456 3 года назад +4

    “Nord doesn’t retain your information.”
    “Here’s this NordPass that retains your passwords.”

  • @loueppi
    @loueppi 3 года назад

    This dude is one of the few ppl i watch the in video ad for, he finds a way to make it entertaining.

  • @FirstLast-hs5op
    @FirstLast-hs5op 4 года назад

    I like this style for Tarkov videos, in the past they seemed sluggish and it was hard to get into, this new setup where it's presented like a old cheesy action movie. Very nice.

  • @alonelyowl4
    @alonelyowl4 4 года назад +2

    I'm 10:38 seconds into the video and my break ended so now I'm taking a shit on the clock just so I can finish watching this video

  • @PinkertonRP
    @PinkertonRP 4 года назад +1

    Crackers and Mayonnaise, another exotic gamer dish. . . right beside two microwaved hot dogs with a squirt of ketchup and no bun.

  • @ronnieruble7298
    @ronnieruble7298 4 года назад +23

    Waiting for the "told you so" video on Mordhau.

    • @jerrodniles
      @jerrodniles 4 года назад +1

      Ronnie Ruble he already talked about it in his podcast bruh

    • @SantaClaus-kk8zr
      @SantaClaus-kk8zr 4 года назад +2

      @@jerrodniles He talks about a lot of stuff in his podcast bruh, a lot of stuff he also makes or made videos on. Bruh.

    • @jerrodniles
      @jerrodniles 4 года назад +1

      Santa Claus Don’t bruh me bruh.

    • @WolfWood893
      @WolfWood893 4 года назад +2

      Jerrod Niles Bruhs lets not bruh each other right now, we’re all Bruhs here.

  • @montablanc1
    @montablanc1 4 года назад +2

    @ 1:19
    We told Tachanka to eat an entire jar of mayonnaise and he actually did it!
    The absolute mad lad!!!

  • @jms4990
    @jms4990 4 года назад +3

    Whenever the "Howdy Partner" bit pops up in your videos, I instantly like.

  • @mccmitchel8476
    @mccmitchel8476 4 года назад +3

    "They don't retain any information" "It saves all your passwords for you"

  • @Tobias5036
    @Tobias5036 4 года назад

    I think you just delivered the first sponsor spot that i didn't skip through.......Nord!! Give this man a raise!

  • @MrWobbles
    @MrWobbles 4 года назад +17

    79th

  • @MichaelSmith-py6mg
    @MichaelSmith-py6mg 4 года назад +4

    The intro reminds me of something you’d see on Spike TV back in the day

  • @damonvi013
    @damonvi013 4 года назад +1

    you know what's sad. these vids are great. i love them. i laugh my ass off at them. but when they end, a feeling washes over me, and i think to myself "it wasnt enough. it felt so short. i need MORE"

  • @ignore2466
    @ignore2466 4 года назад +1

    Amazing charisma and production quality are the reasons I watch your videos

  • @mrlbow
    @mrlbow 4 года назад +6

    "I'm walking out of here with that shotgun. That's whats going to happen. I'm trying to make it so you're alive" Chad gamer move

  • @Its_LumberJack
    @Its_LumberJack 3 года назад +1

    "I'm walking out of here with that shotgun"
    *Immediately throws gun down😂

  • @tommeakin1732
    @tommeakin1732 4 года назад +1

    You have no idea how badly I hoped your slav-jacket would catch fire during that NordVPN ad. I don't even dislike you, that'd just have been really funny

  • @Nemes_memes
    @Nemes_memes 4 года назад

    I think this has been one of my favorite General Sam videos so far. Y'all should play tarkov hide n' seek more often

  • @darkbro111
    @darkbro111 4 года назад +4

    "That was a mil!"
    My Brain: "Runescape drop party in 5 minutes"

  • @Balke7757
    @Balke7757 4 года назад +1

    Sam you should make a video where you steal the train in red dead online and hunt and load all the bodies and skins on to the train and ride into town and I would recommend you do it with friends

  • @nataliakruschev5078
    @nataliakruschev5078 4 года назад +1

    WipeOut64 music? Absolute CHAD.

  • @dougformerlysekkohegane9303
    @dougformerlysekkohegane9303 4 года назад

    Sam nice choice of music in the opening. I bet barely anyone knows what it is from. You gots some good taste.

  • @DaKdawg
    @DaKdawg 4 года назад +1

    Got my fix in. Thanks General.

  • @MadMax-ec8er
    @MadMax-ec8er 4 года назад +1

    I swear every time sam uploads it never fails to bring some joy to my life

  • @cameronbutler9138
    @cameronbutler9138 4 года назад

    Sam I've been a fan for a while now. But the pitbull thumbnail is by far the most hilarious things I've seen RUclips. I'm about to go to work and have a great day. Thanks Sam.

  • @Scorch052
    @Scorch052 4 года назад

    I saw Muscle and Fungle queuing up on Interchange the other day and knew the video was comin. I was not disappointed.

  • @dj16891
    @dj16891 4 года назад

    Yo Gs,
    Order some mimosa bark. Then boil it with 1 10th part vinegar. Then add some caustic acid. About 30 grams unless it's less than 1 to 9. Then add some shellite, immediately after the caustic soda. Shake the solution. Then put in a glass dish. Have fun.

  • @BasedGhostman
    @BasedGhostman 4 года назад +1

    Sam and aqua actually good at a video game?
    This is some nelson mandela alternate dimension shit

  • @AyyyyUhhhh
    @AyyyyUhhhh 4 года назад

    “Ok I’m waking out of here with that shotgun, that’s what’s happening here” fucking great 😂🤣

  • @CSargeP
    @CSargeP 4 года назад

    Man that Wipeout 64 music hit me with a wave of nostalgia.

  • @protostar5767
    @protostar5767 4 года назад +1

    This is one of the most intense opening sequences in cinematic history.

  • @darthjesus7959
    @darthjesus7959 4 года назад

    hey sam, been subscribed for quite a minute now and i gotta say, keep doing ur thing man, there are literally no other well developed youtubers who capitalize on the same things you do nearly as well as you do, and i would be considerably more bored on youtube if you werent here. thanks for sharing with us man, i appreciate it.
    also , you should really try to play with criken again, yalls comedy would play sooooo well off of each other, just ad revenue waiting to be made man i swear
    edit: music fuckin bops

  • @masteredcpucpu7501
    @masteredcpucpu7501 4 года назад

    I love the power couple you made with Hans and Frans. Better love story then twilight

  • @tomca941
    @tomca941 4 года назад +2

    It's always a good day when theres a new Sam video 👌

  • @hwatsitooyah869
    @hwatsitooyah869 4 года назад +10

    Sometimes, I see the way Sam interacts with his buddies and wonder how ruthless he'd be in an apocalyptic wasteland. wait I watched the rust gameplays nvm

    • @aaronb2334
      @aaronb2334 4 года назад +1

      If his kenshi is anything to go by, he will be enslaved with no limbs as a fuck doll

  • @KBA6
    @KBA6 4 года назад +18

    I feel like Sam's forehead grows just a tiny bit longer in every video.

  • @dumbazznigguh
    @dumbazznigguh 4 года назад +1

    You make this game look playable. Now when I try to play I just die in one shot to everyone after loading them up with 45 rounds of paper bullets. 20+ Hours of game play with 0% progress, amazing, fun, and easy to get into...

    • @theasherroseman
      @theasherroseman 4 года назад

      have you figured tarkov out yet? it’s fun once you figured it ouf

  • @Hollycow6464
    @Hollycow6464 4 года назад

    I appreciate the wipeout 64 track. Thanks for bringing this back into my life.

  • @williamhenryharrison644
    @williamhenryharrison644 4 года назад +1

    7:07 what a hatchet job

  • @khanate1879
    @khanate1879 4 года назад

    just gotta say love the music cuts and the fact your chosing songs 44 minutes into beat tapes and not just searching nujabees wannabeats on youtube playlists.

  • @alexorozco6120
    @alexorozco6120 4 года назад

    Thanks to you, Jippy was my number one listened-to artist this year and all my friends made fun of me

  • @cambargera
    @cambargera 4 года назад +16

    Hey Afk guy here. I was taking a shit and told my friend to cover me. He did not.

    • @dominicniederkorn2994
      @dominicniederkorn2994 3 года назад

      I had a toz bitch

    • @cambargera
      @cambargera 3 года назад +1

      @@dominicniederkorn2994 yeah try harder next time. Thanks to you we ended up in a youtube video

  • @TNTspaz
    @TNTspaz 4 года назад +1

    Therapist
    I can now never unsee this and I hate it

  • @I_Am_Monstrum
    @I_Am_Monstrum 4 года назад

    Love the use of the music from wipeout. *chef's kiss

  • @CrimsonEsso
    @CrimsonEsso 4 года назад

    Man, these Tarkov vids are some of your best content yet. Keep em coming man.

  • @nicofromtheweb4891
    @nicofromtheweb4891 4 года назад

    That nordVpn segment was so great. i love it so much. thank you so much

  • @PLANKMAN
    @PLANKMAN 4 года назад +1

    here he is again, back for more, i honestly love this game and love your shenanigans

  • @ryb0nez
    @ryb0nez 4 года назад +5

    The editing in this one made me coom.

    • @thetreedictator3168
      @thetreedictator3168 4 года назад +1

      Jesus is free

    • @grim9287
      @grim9287 4 года назад +3

      @@thetreedictator3168 so is worshipping the dark father, satan, our lord.

    • @thetreedictator3168
      @thetreedictator3168 4 года назад +1

      @@grim9287 cheers, I'll drink to that bro

  • @destraw6221
    @destraw6221 4 года назад +1

    Love your music choices man, all your soundcloud buds sound like school of J Dilla graduates with honors

  • @abrahamgraves1164
    @abrahamgraves1164 4 года назад

    When sam discard that juck box i felt like crying in a corner.

  • @B3ast3fdude
    @B3ast3fdude 4 года назад +1

    you hit me once with the hatchet!! - everyone's getting a taste. lmao

  • @thejoker5755
    @thejoker5755 4 года назад

    Sam you hitting 1 million subs 2020 Congrats my dude

  • @BizKwikTwist
    @BizKwikTwist 4 года назад +1

    Love the epic early 2000's montage music.

  • @RDTengineered
    @RDTengineered 4 года назад

    Waiting for hopefully a Christmas sale to get my friends in. I got in on Black Friday and have been scavving since then.

  • @haminator3237
    @haminator3237 4 года назад +1

    Man I love your videos but it’s always sad when they end cause I have to wait a week to laugh my ass off again

  • @egg5618
    @egg5618 4 года назад +3

    Hey so no one heard this from me but just to let you know Since Tarkov is client-side if you join servers with high ping the game not only runs smoother, but shots connect more and it gives you up to a full second of reaction time. I know this from a vid me and some friends watched recently and it makes a lot of sense. I'm not gonna explain everything here but it works I've tried it. It makes the game much more playable and from what I know many of the big names in Tarkov are using this. Just watch the top right corner of the screen and if they have high ping it will show up as a red number. Most streamers and RUclipsrs cover this. Its believed this is done in an attempt to hide their ping. Just wanna let yall know

  • @alexpaoli7220
    @alexpaoli7220 4 года назад +2

    Woah there is that intro music from Wipeout 64??!!! Bruh

  • @SorryBones
    @SorryBones 4 года назад

    1:00
    Trailer moment right there, gamer moves

  • @ZJtraylor
    @ZJtraylor 4 года назад +2

    “I feel like my track suit is melting to my body.” You know you have a human child under your care right?

  • @rambojohn272727
    @rambojohn272727 Год назад +1

    It's ironic that before the found in raid mechanic came out, no one would want to leave tarkov, there was too much money that you could make to want to leave. Now that found in raid has ruined the game, all people want to do is leave tarkov but you can't. Makes me sad.

  • @gonufc
    @gonufc 4 года назад +5

    Sam's suddenly turned into some sort of cyber weirdo that also likes to go to a fancy, expensive gym with the lads from the investment group.

  • @jondoe6663
    @jondoe6663 2 года назад

    Fun fact: Hanger is also a term for a type of sword.

  • @arran6369
    @arran6369 4 года назад +5

    Anyone remember when the title of this video was “I can’t stop playing tarkov”

    • @MineSlimeTV
      @MineSlimeTV 4 года назад

      I didnt knew of this but thank you for however asking me my dearest! ^^

  • @brandonthejust3883
    @brandonthejust3883 4 года назад

    I've been playing tarkov for over a year, and i never knew you could drag roubles into the required items slot when buying stuff

  • @ICanHazAnything
    @ICanHazAnything 4 года назад

    LOL! "The fart jettisons into your belly button and parts your stomach hair like moses and the red sea" fuckin dying.

  • @sshep86
    @sshep86 4 года назад +5

    The Nord 'Hack' was never about stealing saved information. It was about someone accessing the tunnel and being able to decrypt information travelling through it because they had access to the key. So although there was no saved information on the servers, someone could see the information that was being sent and received through the tunnel/s, potentially identifying information or stuff you don't want anyone knowing. In other words, the entire reason for using a VPN was compromised and although there was no data saved on the servers, there was nothing to stop the person who gained access from saving the information flowing through the tunnel. In fact, there is no way of ever knowing what information was stolen, because no data is kept to refer to. If someone has had important info stolen, they will never know.

  • @zeuscaboose7202
    @zeuscaboose7202 3 года назад

    A year later this is still gold

  • @zackcox4002
    @zackcox4002 4 года назад

    We need Sam to play with the Chad's shroud, doc, etc. Would be pretty interesting

  • @HorstEwald
    @HorstEwald 4 года назад +1

    Seeing Sam actually DRAGGING the money to purchase those CAR medkits killed me.
    I'm dead now.

  • @jimbo0o0o
    @jimbo0o0o 4 года назад

    So glad I can run this game now, was rocking the 650 ti for a long time.

  • @domingoiocco8183
    @domingoiocco8183 4 года назад

    Sam really know's the art of making deal's people can't refuse

  • @WaitsForTheMoon
    @WaitsForTheMoon 4 года назад

    "Everybody's gettin a taste" I laughed till I cried.

  • @DiranJiru
    @DiranJiru 4 года назад

    Ah heck. Here I go NOT escaping Tarkov again.

  • @meesterpooppyy1033
    @meesterpooppyy1033 4 года назад

    Man the background music went hard at 4:17

  • @unorubbertoe
    @unorubbertoe 4 года назад +1

    Just heard you on the official podcast...my favorite episode yet. Calling Charlie out on his BS 😂

  • @jesuschrist194
    @jesuschrist194 4 года назад +2

    I love your videos, absolutely the highlight of youtube videos of my week, every time, keep the hussle going man

  • @morose1434
    @morose1434 4 года назад +2

    I saw you change the title Sam u will not lie to us anymore

  • @Jankyo
    @Jankyo 4 года назад

    I cannot stop watching Sam play Tarkov