I've been trying to study narcissim for years from secular sources, and I never found anything that described my situation this exactly. These videos are getting rid of so much confusion and finally giving me peace that I'm doing the right thing. My narcissistic mother turned on me when I was about 3-4 years old. She would give me week long silent treatments at that age and actively teach my younger brother that I was inherently bad. Trying to brainwash him against me. I always thought that my mother hoped that I would grow into a bad person, so that she could feel justified in her abuse. I didn't, and she hates that. It has almost become and obsession of hers to make me slip up and prove that she was justified. A life long smear campaign. People who know me well did not believe her. Extended relatives, long time family friends, etc. But other narcissists, a few codependents, and random "well meaning" muslims buy her lies from time to time. They cycle into our lives, play her flying monkey, help her oppress, realize who she is, then leave. Now I'm wondering if they really just leave because I give them no reaction. These types of people are arrogant, in my opinion. If you don't know the full story, don't jump in to oppress someone you don't know. They think of themselves are great muslims who are defending a "poor hurt mother" from an ungrateful child. It's like they get caught up in a mob mentality and enjoy targeting one person. It's fun for them to think that they know about the secret "evil" side of me, because I am someone who used to have a consistently good reputation. When you're known for being calm and quiet, a lot of people seem to want to see you lose control. At some very hard points of my life, these busy bodies had made my life much much harder. But after all of these experiences, I really don't care about what these types of people think at all anymore. And despite the religious manipulation they threw at me, I have gotten much closer to Allah alhamdullilah. It made me less attached to this world. Now I can sort of see how you can be involved in the community in a good way while still not depending too much on other people. The connection to Allah has to be the main thing and everything else comes through that.
Sometimes your both parents and all your siblings hate you only because you are an empath, you are a positive person, you have a strong faith, you help everyone, you are not constantly complaining about your life, .... Life is a test. 😢 A big test😢
Listening to this is validating. I finally left my narcissistic parents and now they’re running a smear campaign against me, and it makes me feel sad. The things they’re telling relatives and friends I realise are from the reactive abuse and also confessions of their crime, but of course the flying monkeys don’t see or understand this. I’ve also realised that my narcissistic eldest sister has been setting traps for me and running a smear campaign against me since I was very young. I’m the crazy person. I keep telling myself that Allah sees everything.
These podcasts have truly been a life-changer. I didn’t know that I was dealing with a narcissist until the friendship ended. I love how there’s an Islamic perspective on narcissism which I know A LOT of people will benefit from as it is needed in today’s society. May Allah bless you dr. Mona you have really helped me understand What type of a person I was dealing with, and how I can look for signs if I’m dealing with a narcissist again❤️
Alhamdulillah. This has really helped me, especially with my own brother posing the question of me bullying my ex and my mom saying that she knows how I can talk to a person. JazaakAllah Khair ❤
MashaAllah may Allah bless your Dr... From a sister to another, only Allah can repay you for your hardwork in educating and enlightening those in the similar situation. I have got my answers and I'm in the midst of going through his smear campaign right now. Alhamdullilah alhamdullilah I thank Allah so much for the time when I got to know of your youtube channel. Your clarity in delivering the knowledge is the gift Allah has bless you with. May Allah keeps you in his guidance and on the straight path.. ❤❤❤
Listening to your podcast everyday when the new one comes out talks about what I am going through now. I am learning everyday from you how to deal with the situation and answers from it. May allah swt bless you for these podcasts and everything your doing. I wish I had the money to take the counselling from you but I don’t. I am listening so far from here and learning about narcissist and who I am as a person. I am empathetic person by the way and I can’t wait for your future podcast about the children involved in this . As I am worried for them at the moment as a mother. Insha allah keep them coming may allah swt reward you immensely for this.
I am waiting on that one as that’s the situation I am in now after the divorce. I never knew about narcissist before this until I’ve shared my experience with a close friend of mine. That’s when she send me a clip about narcissistic muslim husband. And from there landed on your podcasts which really since I have been listening was talking about what I was going through right now. If I didn’t listen to your podcasts from an Islamic perspective I wouldn’t have understood properly who I was dealing with maybe but Alhamdullilah everything happens for a reasons. May Allah reward you keep them coming sis .
Assalamualaikum. First of all, I really appreciate the content that you have been creating, and muslim ummah needs more people like you. May Allah reward you immensely for this. I have a question, that is not really related to this specific topic you talked about in this video. I wanted to ask, that if a scapegoat after being abused for most of their lives, do not want to get married, is it a sin? Marriage completes half of the deen; it's a common saying. I am in my early twenties, and I have been repeatedly told by my narcissistic mother how important it is to get married early, and I am sure she will do everything to find a man like her, controlling and abusive, and I don't want that to happen. Since I was small, the thought of marriage scared me, because all I heard was "who will want you?" "you will get thrown out" "You will understand how difficult life is after you get married", etc. Hearing these constantly made me fearful of marriage. I have a lot of healing to do, and once I am able to stand on my own feet, I will heal. And I would like to think that I can be happy alone. Some of the most peaceful times I have experienced is when I was by myself. I just need some reassurance, after hearing it constantly, that not marrying won't make me a sinful hopeless person. Thank you.
Wsalaam, thank you so much I'm so glad it helped alhamdulilah :) marriage is a sunnah upon those who don't fear falling into sinful temptations and zina and an obligation for those who are likely to fall into zina. So, if you're happier, safer and more at peace alone, that's totally fine, there's nothing wrong with staying single unless you want to stay single to do wrong things. From what you said, I believe you have a lot of healing to do to get out of the mindset that you're not worth marrying and then your desire for marriage may change. Marriage is a beautiful relationship with the right empathic person and it's a shame to not want to get married because of your past traumas, so it's something you can work on inshallah and heal from. You can email me for 1-1 counselling: author@themuslimnarcissist.com Once, you elevate your nafs to empath status, you'll attract a good person if it's meant for you inshallah
Make dua Allah sends you a partner that fulfills you and you fulfill them. As humans we need connection, and part of honouring our needs is to take the healing steps towards it. Alhamdulilah while I had an awful upbringing, but Allah sent me a beautiful husband with whom I can heal with. be open to the goodness Allah sends you, inshallah you will regain your sense of self-worth...it took me a long time too
Usually out of the picture, blaming the victim for being with the narc in the first place or supporting them, or they're the narc's flying monkeys too and take their side against their own family member. It depends.
@@themuslimnarcissistbook that’s exactly what’s happening to me - you got yourself into this mess get yourself out. I don’t have brothers or a father - he picked me for this reason. I caught him with his new supply last week and now he wants to meet for a talk and I’m worried he will ambush me with divorce (saying it three times) HasbunAllah wanikmal wakil. I feel so scared and oppressed 😔
Let him divorce youuuuu let it be . I’ve been through this your not going to heal till his out of your life and Allah swt will send you the right person but when you are healed
@@JoAu-c5b inshAllah sister, you can’t believe how much I want to start grieving over the loss of MY baby (it doesn’t feel like it was connected to him anymore) and my imaginary marriage 🤲🏼
I've been trying to study narcissim for years from secular sources, and I never found anything that described my situation this exactly. These videos are getting rid of so much confusion and finally giving me peace that I'm doing the right thing.
My narcissistic mother turned on me when I was about 3-4 years old. She would give me week long silent treatments at that age and actively teach my younger brother that I was inherently bad. Trying to brainwash him against me.
I always thought that my mother hoped that I would grow into a bad person, so that she could feel justified in her abuse. I didn't, and she hates that. It has almost become and obsession of hers to make me slip up and prove that she was justified. A life long smear campaign.
People who know me well did not believe her. Extended relatives, long time family friends, etc.
But other narcissists, a few codependents, and random "well meaning" muslims buy her lies from time to time. They cycle into our lives, play her flying monkey, help her oppress, realize who she is, then leave. Now I'm wondering if they really just leave because I give them no reaction.
These types of people are arrogant, in my opinion. If you don't know the full story, don't jump in to oppress someone you don't know. They think of themselves are great muslims who are defending a "poor hurt mother" from an ungrateful child.
It's like they get caught up in a mob mentality and enjoy targeting one person. It's fun for them to think that they know about the secret "evil" side of me, because I am someone who used to have a consistently good reputation. When you're known for being calm and quiet, a lot of people seem to want to see you lose control.
At some very hard points of my life, these busy bodies had made my life much much harder.
But after all of these experiences, I really don't care about what these types of people think at all anymore. And despite the religious manipulation they threw at me, I have gotten much closer to Allah alhamdullilah.
It made me less attached to this world. Now I can sort of see how you can be involved in the community in a good way while still not depending too much on other people. The connection to Allah has to be the main thing and everything else comes through that.
hii, assalamu alaykum!!! this is my exact situation!!!! do you want to get in touch?
Sometimes your both parents and all your siblings hate you only because you are an empath, you are a positive person, you have a strong faith, you help everyone, you are not constantly complaining about your life, ....
Life is a test. 😢 A big test😢
Listening to this is validating. I finally left my narcissistic parents and now they’re running a smear campaign against me, and it makes me feel sad. The things they’re telling relatives and friends I realise are from the reactive abuse and also confessions of their crime, but of course the flying monkeys don’t see or understand this. I’ve also realised that my narcissistic eldest sister has been setting traps for me and running a smear campaign against me since I was very young. I’m the crazy person. I keep telling myself that Allah sees everything.
😢 😢 it is not easy.
@@user-nhfdstgv no, it’s not 😢💔
These podcasts have truly been a life-changer. I didn’t know that I was dealing with a narcissist until the friendship ended. I love how there’s an Islamic perspective on narcissism which I know A LOT of people will benefit from as it is needed in today’s society. May Allah bless you dr. Mona you have really helped me understand What type of a person I was dealing with, and how I can look for signs if I’m dealing with a narcissist again❤️
omg the accuracy wallahi. am shook
Hearing you i realized how badly i became an codependent person thanks to you im healing now towards the empath again inshallah.
Alhamdulilah :)
Alhamdulillah. This has really helped me, especially with my own brother posing the question of me bullying my ex and my mom saying that she knows how I can talk to a person. JazaakAllah Khair ❤
Alhamdulilah :)
s
MashaAllah may Allah bless your Dr... From a sister to another, only Allah can repay you for your hardwork in educating and enlightening those in the similar situation. I have got my answers and I'm in the midst of going through his smear campaign right now. Alhamdullilah alhamdullilah I thank Allah so much for the time when I got to know of your youtube channel. Your clarity in delivering the knowledge is the gift Allah has bless you with. May Allah keeps you in his guidance and on the straight path.. ❤❤❤
Alhamdulilah, so glad it’s helping ♥️
Alhamdulilah sister you are truly a blessing - desperately needed to hear this right now❤
Very relevant to me right now as my ex is currently doing this to me :) thank you for all your help
Thanks for this.
You're welcome :)
❤❤❤ amazing!!! And insightful xxx
SubhanAllah. May Allah AWJ protect us from our own nafs and every sharr..
Listening to your podcast everyday when the new one comes out talks about what I am going through now. I am learning everyday from you how to deal with the situation and answers from it. May allah swt bless you for these podcasts and everything your doing. I wish I had the money to take the counselling from you but I don’t. I am listening so far from here and learning about narcissist and who I am as a person. I am empathetic person by the way and I can’t wait for your future podcast about the children involved in this . As I am worried for them at the moment as a mother. Insha allah keep them coming may allah swt reward you immensely for this.
Alhamdulilah Muna I'm so glad they help :) I've got podcasts about parenting and co-parenting coming out later this month inshallah.
I am waiting on that one as that’s the situation I am in now after the divorce. I never knew about narcissist before this until I’ve shared my experience with a close friend of mine. That’s when she send me a clip about narcissistic muslim husband. And from there landed on your podcasts which really since I have been listening was talking about what I was going through right now. If I didn’t listen to your podcasts from an Islamic perspective I wouldn’t have understood properly who I was dealing with maybe but Alhamdullilah everything happens for a reasons. May Allah reward you keep them coming sis .
@@MunaMohamud-ck3fc you're most welcome. I wish I had this info when I was going through it too, so I'm super glad you're all waking up to this now
Thank you for this podcast. The Islamic perspective always alleviates me. 🤲🏼🤲🏼🤲🏼🕋🕋🕋
Assalamualaikum. First of all, I really appreciate the content that you have been creating, and muslim ummah needs more people like you. May Allah reward you immensely for this.
I have a question, that is not really related to this specific topic you talked about in this video. I wanted to ask, that if a scapegoat after being abused for most of their lives, do not want to get married, is it a sin? Marriage completes half of the deen; it's a common saying. I am in my early twenties, and I have been repeatedly told by my narcissistic mother how important it is to get married early, and I am sure she will do everything to find a man like her, controlling and abusive, and I don't want that to happen. Since I was small, the thought of marriage scared me, because all I heard was "who will want you?" "you will get thrown out" "You will understand how difficult life is after you get married", etc. Hearing these constantly made me fearful of marriage. I have a lot of healing to do, and once I am able to stand on my own feet, I will heal. And I would like to think that I can be happy alone. Some of the most peaceful times I have experienced is when I was by myself. I just need some reassurance, after hearing it constantly, that not marrying won't make me a sinful hopeless person.
Thank you.
Wsalaam, thank you so much I'm so glad it helped alhamdulilah :) marriage is a sunnah upon those who don't fear falling into sinful temptations and zina and an obligation for those who are likely to fall into zina. So, if you're happier, safer and more at peace alone, that's totally fine, there's nothing wrong with staying single unless you want to stay single to do wrong things.
From what you said, I believe you have a lot of healing to do to get out of the mindset that you're not worth marrying and then your desire for marriage may change. Marriage is a beautiful relationship with the right empathic person and it's a shame to not want to get married because of your past traumas, so it's something you can work on inshallah and heal from. You can email me for 1-1 counselling: author@themuslimnarcissist.com
Once, you elevate your nafs to empath status, you'll attract a good person if it's meant for you inshallah
Make dua Allah sends you a partner that fulfills you and you fulfill them. As humans we need connection, and part of honouring our needs is to take the healing steps towards it. Alhamdulilah while I had an awful upbringing, but Allah sent me a beautiful husband with whom I can heal with. be open to the goodness Allah sends you, inshallah you will regain your sense of self-worth...it took me a long time too
Where is the victims family when this is happening???
Usually out of the picture, blaming the victim for being with the narc in the first place or supporting them, or they're the narc's flying monkeys too and take their side against their own family member. It depends.
@@themuslimnarcissistbook that’s exactly what’s happening to me - you got yourself into this mess get yourself out. I don’t have brothers or a father - he picked me for this reason. I caught him with his new supply last week and now he wants to meet for a talk and I’m worried he will ambush me with divorce (saying it three times) HasbunAllah wanikmal wakil. I feel so scared and oppressed 😔
Let him divorce youuuuu let it be . I’ve been through this your not going to heal till his out of your life and Allah swt will send you the right person but when you are healed
@@JoAu-c5b inshAllah sister, you can’t believe how much I want to start grieving over the loss of MY baby (it doesn’t feel like it was connected to him anymore) and my imaginary marriage 🤲🏼