For someone who plays gruff, aggressive characters, JB remains one of the most thoughtful, charismatic, and genuine guys I've seen in showbiz. We need more Jon Bernthals in the world
This is perfect advice for life. The one's who are screaming the loudest and trying to show off their idea of masculinity are the most afraid and insecure of us all.
In my experience, the people who are the most secure never have to tell you about it, and certainly don't need to proclaim themselves loudly to be "alpha males". It's the same thing that actual "nice guys" are never going to need to tell you they are nice guys. It's about trying to convince people that they are a thing, to create a perception, rather than just being that thing which is actually far less work.
@@shanouboubou That's horseshit. Confidence is able to be quiet, and able to be loud. And generally, it is loud. Only two types of people are loud, confident people who know they can handle the attention, and narcissists who know they can make themselves look like the confident people. Think about it logically, how could being loud be a way for an insecure narcissist to make themselves look confident, if it wasn't something confident people actually do? How can you pretend to be confident by being loud, if confident people are quiet?
Similar to Keanu Reeves, Jon Bernthal knows how to act like a scary badass but in reality is an all-around nice person to be around. Very kind, very empathetic
I remember discovering astronaut Jonny Kim on a Star Trek anniversary podcast. This guy has a ridiculous resume being a Navy SEAL, sniper, doctor, pilot. He is all smiles and comes off as a super friendly science guy that can wow the kids being an astronaut. He's on Jocko's podcast, and the military operator comes out, I'm like "whoah!".
Jon Bernthal has been a favourite ever since the first episode of The Walking Dead. His performance as Shane was on point, and he's SO GOOD at portraying conflicted, complex characters. I hope to see him reprise his role as Frank Castle in The Punisher in a near future.
Agreed, Shane was my favorite character because he felt so REAL to the situation they were in. Andrea (I think that was her name) too, and I stopped watching after she was killed off through stupidity. Both felt like actual humans experiencing the situation, where most characters felt like...well comic book characters, which is what they essentially are. Graphic novels, at least of the era TWD came out, were still very much marketed almost exclusively to comic book fans, so the characters still fit tropes. I mean, come on, chick with a nodachi with 2 zombies on chains...that is 100% comic book. But Shane? Felt like a real person.
I think exactly the same. That was first time I saw him on screen and immediately knew he was gonna be a big actor. He's just a good person who has his head screwed on the right way and is an unbelievable actor, and i'm sure family man. Crazy where he is now compared to that first episode of the walking dead.
Dude is desperately describing human decency in a way that tells me that society is failing him and his children on that idea. He seems like an absolute gem.
@@JayRudolph77 no, you understand and accept that filthy narrative... so delusional that you cannot admit to have been scammed, and how all your donations went for a mansion.
@@JayRudolph77 Hmmm this would be against the narrative that you all made during the summer of riots.... Being scammed by those frauds is just one of the many things you all deserve after accepting to let cities burn...
Abuse is unfamiliar. I'm glad it's strength that I sit down and accept it. Hate isn't always weakness, and acceptance isn't always strength. grow up and chuck the mantras
the masculinity he instills on his children is healthy, be strong and tough and independent, because you need to be able to take care of yourself well so you can help others, it's not about being the most dominant person in the room, but to be the kindest and most reliable, someone people can lean on when they need to
Being strong and tough are not masculine attributes, I know many more strong and tough women than men. Talking about major life issues, not a bar fight.
@@lucianoluggren Yes indeed they are. If they are not, then what is a masculine trait? Just being a trait can be found in both sexes does not mean that trait can't be gendered. It's simply a matter of conducing enough studies to determine which trait is more commonly found in which sex. Outliers mean very little. There is a reason why it's ALWAYS men who risk their lives to save strangers across the entire globe. That's not an accident. That's not social conditioning. Is it that hard to understand that the sex that's primarily bigger, less prone to injuries, denser bones and muscles, produces more testosterone, is more likely to be tough? Really? lol If I tell you smoking can cause cancer, do you rebut with "oh but my grandpa smoked and he's fine!"
@@atgrandfathersknee3065absolutely no. Is not ALWAYS the male that saves others, in fact there are thousands of women that throughout history already proved you wrong. As a man I always hated how "being tough", "working hard", "provide for the family" is always seen as a "masculine" thing or something specifically attached to a "man", because it's simply not true. In fact Is the quite opposite, since being a straight white man is the gratest privilege you can have means that a woman is most likely work 10x harder just to achieve the same thing because we still live in a patriarchy society. Because virtues are not maschuline trait, but human traits (something that apperently we all forgot). I don't know what kind of cave in alaska are you stuck in, but I would highly suggest to go out and meet some women.
I remember talking to a therapist about why I was struggling to reach out and form romantic relationships that lasted longer than a few months, and he managed to single out something very crucial. It turned out that the issue wasn't because of anything particularly harmful. My parents came from another country where toxic masculinity was rampant. I'd never heard my father call my mother by her first name in my entire life. I never saw them showing each other open displays of affection. So I legitimately just didn't know how to maintain a relationship with significant signs of affection to my partners. They would break it off, not because they disliked me, but because to them it just seemed like I wasn't very interested or committed. Toxic masculinity doesn't just hurt your partners. It hurts your children, too.
@@theyautjawarrior6652 It's not associated with women generally which is why the generalized name. However, nothing prevents any human from doing anything harmful to another human. There are no limits in that regard - gender, race, religion, philosophy, etc. But, since most people associate "less visible feelings" with men, that's why this trait is considered a toxic masculine one. A toxic feminine trait would be a trait traditionally associated with women that has negative impacts. For example, women are sometimes known to be super competitive with each other over guys or outfits - that would be toxic. It's just that toxic femininity doesn't tend to have the same kind of harsh outcomes that toxic masculinity does so people mostly talk about toxic masculinity as it pertains to societal problems like job wage inequality or rape.
@@MrBrock314 Wage inequality and toxic masculinity have nothing to do with each other, and lots of women rape, also sometimes being competitive with other people is a good thing
A Woman’s goal is to seek out long term relationships ours is to spread our seed. There is nothing wrong with being a man. I’m tired of this culture saying it’s a bad thing to be a man and men eating it up.
@@Garett.1214 If your only goal in life is to spread your seed that's a little depressing dude Nobody is saying something is wrong with being a man, I'm saying that the idea that a man should try to be incredibly stoic and hide their emotions is a stupid old stereotype that should have been left behind years ago. Covering up your emotions doesn't make you strong, it makes you too afraid to be honest with the people around you. Strength is accepting your flaws and understanding they are a part of you no matter what.
I'm an 18 year old carpenter's apprentice, this last weekend I crashed my car, and the next day my 13 year old dog died. I'm working out of town (2 hours away from my home) and while I was talking to the journeyman I always work with about my situation and let him know I was thinking about asking to be taken off the job, he told me it's a man's place to take those feelings and shove them deep inside yourself, and push on for the sake of being a man. I was starting to tear up a bit but remained calm and he told me don't let anyone see you cry or they'll know you're a p*ssy. I'm very confident in my idea of masculinity and his comments haven't impacted me too deeply because I have strong male role models in my life that speak similiarly to John here. I'm continuing with the job but also seeking professional assistance as I'm starting to feel very overwhelmed. My point is that understanding and reflecting on what true masculinity is, is extremely important for young men and by extension knowing that it is okay to properly grieve, and experience emotions in general. I love hearing people be this genuine
To me it seems like the problem isn't being too Masculine or Feminine, it's defining certain skills or traits as "masculine" or "feminine". I've known dudes that'll move you to tears with their poetry and I've known chicks who can hunt and fish with the best of them... I say just let people do what they want and don't get so concerned with labels. Like Jon says, it's about being a well rounded individual, open to any new experiences... and other than that, just treat people how you want them to treat you. It's not that hard.
Well said. During the covid lockdown I started painting my nails as an activity to do with my wife and I really liked it so I still do it. I've lost count of how many times a male coworker or family member has asked me why I paint my nails, usually in a tone of voice that sounds condescending or judgmental.
@@mastod0n1 I have a friend who paints his nails and whenever any person asks him why he does it, usually with a dickish tone as you mentioned, he just answers "because it's fun." and then moves on with his day unbothered lol works surprisingly well.
This was beautiful. It doesn't have to be a false dichotomy. You can be disciplined, tough, self reliant, and know how to defend yourself but also be humble, kind, considerate, mindful. I 100% agree with him and that's how I want to raise my son. Every interview I see him on he seems like such a cool dude.
One of the most powerful images of Jon is him standing with the trans flag behind him. That image speaks 1000 words. It shows that he is open to everyone, willing to take on new ideas, stand up for others, doesn't let his insecurities project on others... so much. To have a man like Jon, the typical hyper-masculine figure, stand in front of that flag... it shows that compassion for others and empathy, is ALSO a masculine trait because that should be a fundamentally HUMAN trait.
this is why he is my favorite actor, he knows what's right from wrong where to show authority to people and where to be respectful, he's such a genuine person and we need more men like this in the world, and I'm saying this as a guy and I know we aren't all great but we need to be better
@Nick Foster I think you may be confusing that with misandry and yes that is definitely another problem but stop acting like just cus women got problems doesn't mean we don't need to fix ours. Especially when those problems are already not commonly accepted as tolerable.
Its no wonder this guy was so good as the Punisher. He embraces the positives of classic masculinity but is all too aware of where people end up going way too far and embracing the darker more negative elements, which is what the Punisher is.
@@generalveers9544 they addressed that in the comics. I think it was a couple of cops that had put a punisher skull on their squad car and showed it to him. Frank told them that if they want a role model then look at Captain America because he's not someone to look up to
@@joshritz7067 Frank hates coips. It's well documented in the comics. I should know, I'm 4 issues away from having a complete set. Yes, I'm a geek, but in this case, I'm an informed geek.
Because not all forms of masculinity are toxic, that is just the perception that people have, he even pointed out an example of toxic masculinity, the blow hard that brags about being the number one tough guy it's a great example of toxic masculinity, because real men are not men of loud words they are men of action, to stand up for the little guy and protect people that can't protect themselves is a positive form of masculinity
@@onamattapeeya facts like those men make masculinity look horrible, but it is important to keep those classic values of upholding that strong image for the betterment of yourself while connecting on more emotional and emphatic levels that are equally as important for society as men. People like Andrew Tate are horrible for young men like me, but there are also slight aspects of truth that can make society ever evolving in a positive way.
@@everythinglakers1713 now that is perspective that is new to me because I was a teenager when Nirvana hit, and there was a lot of toxic masculinity , but it's important for people to distinguish between the negative and positive aspects of masculinity, standing up for the little guy or speaking up for what's right is never toxic, and it is not even exclusively masculine it is just a common trait that decent people share, almost every rule, every law, and every religion can be boiled down to one simple statement, don't be a jerk...
As they should. Young men are killing themselves at a higher rate than ever before because they have been condemned for being men and have no idea who they are supposed to be.
One of the things I've always loved about Bernthal's acting is how he can portray toughness or even brutality just as well as vulnerability, often at the same time, such as in "Wind River," "Fury," or "The Accountant." It's very easy to believe he has high emotional intelligence and regard for the importance of feelings.
He does that in "The Punisher", too! The character as portrayed by Bernthal is a very broken and violent man, but he still can be vulnerable and sensitive.
Brax: Did you ever see a match-grade round travelling three thousand feet per second go through a window? [guard standing near window drops dead as shot shatters glass] Brax: Nobody does.
So right on... it takes courage and strength to be empathetic, in touch with your emotions and to care about other people. That's not for the weak... it takes no strength to be apathetic, cruel or pessimistic.
@@Dionysos- 🎵You're gonna hang like Benito from the Esso Rafters, hang like Clara with her skull caved in🎵 And then You're gonna do what Papa Adolph did when he saw what happened to them
Well-versed and nuanced parents are the key to creating a human who is in touch with every aspect of the human experience. I thank my parents every day for teaching me this every day and I’m sure John Bernthal’s kids probably feel the same way
So great to hear someone speak openly about his concerns and his efforts to educate well rounded children in touch with those ideas we consider traditionally "masculine" and expressing an outright need for the "feminine" side and skill base and how a refusal to experience or express the feminine side is borne of fear and dissociation with their own fullest identity and humanity
Trust me bro: you'll be much better off if you express the need for the feminin side in the form of a girlfriend or a wife, and experience it in her, rather than in yourself. And it is a must if you want to have the very children who you can then educate in the first place. Traditional masculinity is what got all of your male ancestors laid throughout history.
@@urhunn7778 Right, because there have never been any women attracted to artists... Jon's mention of Samurai was perfect. I believe we are more confident and attractive humans when we are well rounded. It goes both ways too, I know plenty of men who like a woman that's ok getting her hands dirty.
That's so true. The loud guy is insecure and scared. He's loud because he's bluffing. He's thinking, maybe he can bluff confidence and arrogance so that people won't try to fight him.
I met Jon years ago at my Starbucks. He had the cutest dogs! I asked him if I could pet them, and he was like absolutely. We chatted for a while and I found that he was one of the sweetest men I have ever met. He has an amazing heart!
Watching this right after the election and the fact that young men were a driving force for the results, Jon's answers ring even more true. The insecurities of men are driving us into doom and despair. We need to do better by them and teach them that being a man doesn't mean being "tough" and "strong at all costs".
Jon stayed at a hotel that I worked front desk at, I took the chance to tell him that he was doing an amazing job as The Punisher. He said, "Thank you" and shook my hand.
I always thought his voice was naturally as rough as he does it in the Punisher. Cool to see just how much of a transformation that performance actually was
@@NovaBlueNova Well, not like the slogan that you all said 2 years ago... how it was? "Burn loot murder"? Hmmm no, still the summary of all your action was that
I think I accidentally learned the importance of kindness early and what true kindness is. I got bullied alot and I used to just wonder why. And you know I'd come home to my parents and ask and my parents would say it's because they mistake my kindness for weakness. I was respectful and didn't horseplay and wasn't aggressive. So my kind attitude had them mistake me for a wimp. Well eventually I learned where to draw lines and when it's appropriate to be stern and when you should be kind. But I learned the difference and I think it's important. A lot of people really do equate kindness with weakness but it's not. It often takes strength to stop someone from hurting another person. It takes strength of character to know when someone is hurting and asking or trying to find a way to help. Not everyone wants to deal with people's problems. But yea there are many postive traits in masculinity but of course if used wrong well you can get the negatives. Just depends.
I agree but I also think that sometimes you have to accept that you have sadness and that your life hasn't been what you want, and to accept that as part of your life. Crying is good when you need to let it out. Sometimes it gets too much. But a better thing to do it to write out how you feel. That can get your thoughts into words and not just swimming in your head.
I love that he used the samurai as an example. When I was a teen, my parents were unavailable, so I had few wise people in my life. I read a lot of the writings of Miyamoto Musashi, and honestly, he very much believed in being balanced and well-rounded. His teachings have helped me build a very safe and balanced life for myself.
My wife is the strongest human I know. She had a terrible medical event in mexico just recently and I think we all need support and love one another. Bless to you all. I know you are all fine, but I hope the best to u all. Mailbox is still available conan.
@@corpsefoot758 After. He even admits what a POS he was and all the bad things he did. The first step in any self growth.Then the story of the father and son and how the father couldn't call it.. just incredible.
After watching that interview. I concluded that Shia is just a very lost boy. And he is taking his first steps into adulthood. It's weird to see a full grown man having to go through the stuff most people go through between the ages of 12-16. There wasn't much wisdom to be found. But a lot of humility and introspection for sure.
@@glp.1337 " I concluded that Shia is just a very lost boy. And he is taking his first steps into adulthood" Freakin well said! Some men go through their whole lives not ever growing up.
Jon is one of the most humble actors I've ever seen. he's so down to earth I love him for it! ever since I first saw him on TWD I was a fan. and everything he's done since then has been epic.
@@samcochran8203 2, kiddo, 2. Now, you might start to act like the intelectual that you are not (and bending the knee to hollywood and wokeism show it), saying that there are some cases of intersex, however, those tragedies do not make it the rule, because nature speaks clears.. MALE AND FEMALES... And now... I guess you have no idea what a woman is, right?
the best men are the ones who do their best to love, protect, provide and teach their kids true right from wrong a man who stays humble and doesn't lose themselves to pride and arrogance a man who commits to staying focused always on what is important to him and keeping it safe, thriving and surviving.
I love this. Real strong men care for those that can’t take care of themselves. Protect the weak and lift up those that can’t lift up themselves. Real men lift up others. They don’t punch down on others.
His idea of being masculine is very much how I feel about it. Being strong is not just for you, but also to protect those who may not be able to protect themselves and to be kind and caring for those who may not receive those things in life.
There is maybe not one celebrity that I would love to be friends with more. He seems like such a nice guy, a really cool dude to work with from what it sounds like, and just an all-around good dude.
I interviewed Jon Bernthal years ago and he was so thoughtful. It was really telling that what lit him up wasn't talking about the movie he was there to discuss, but the charity he and his brother, Nick (a doctor), founded together called Drops Fill Buckets. Just a good person all around.
As the brother of Peter Cullen (former marine himself) said, "Be strong enough to be gentle." And it's so true. It takes far more strength to be kind, to have compassion, and to not become disillusioned by the cruelty of the world than it does to just follow what your monkey brain tells you to do. That's the easy way out. Nobody gains when you're just thinking about yourself. As a species, we can only move forward if we stop and pick up the ones who fall along the way.
The only time it begins to be toxic is when you're oppose to someone wanting to do the opposite of what you think is "manly" if you want to raise your kid to be a hunting woodsman but he decides its not for him and he enjoys fashion instead you embrace that and support him and never scold and down him for it.
Never mistake strength with cruelty, ambivalence, or bitterness. And never mistake femininity with weakness. The sooner people realize this, the better off we'll all be.
I would add that toxic masculinity also includes the idea that you can never be weak, depressed, sad, anxious, or tired. Men are human too. They need to remember that and we all need to remember that.
One lesson my Dad taught me about if you have to fight was the loudest guy wasn’t all that tough or was scared and hoped you’d back down. He also said the that is calm and quiet is the one you need to take seriously. He knows how to handle himself in a fight.
I love Jon Bernthal and to expand on what he said about his guest who was a SEAL: you see this with real combat vets - they are the most compassionate and caring people because they know that all that matters is the wellbeing of the person next to you.
Discipline is an interesting word. If one refers to “disciplining their child” it often means clobbering them for misbehaving, thus bending them to a rule. If we say someone has discipline it often means they’re in control, patient and at peace. Orderly. If we say someone has learned a discipline it usually means a skill dependant on learning finer details and observations. Often mindful, valuable. How different the outcome if you educate a child with each, especially in regards to self defense, fighting, and the tough guy convo. Can create chaos, a neutral observer, or a thoughtful producer. (I think a % of each is important)
I listened to Jon on Rogan. I think he spoke about having an understanding of actual violence is a big thing. I think he used the word "relationship." It was perfect the way he said it. The people that have never experienced violence don't understand it. But it's always around us. The point is not to make people scared of it. The point is to prepare yourself as much as you can to deal with it. You'll always be scared. Just put yourself in a situation where you can defend yourself if needed.
This guy is a model of what positive masculinity can be. Everytime the contrast between him and his most iconic characters amazes me. He's such a luminous and sweet guy, yet tough.
Jon B is a real one. His Frank Castle was brilliant. He seems like a great father. Thoughtful kind and strong at the same time. Not all masculinity is toxic. The way he talks of the samurai gardening and cooking is dope. As a masculine man I do those and other things that would be considered feminine in Americans 1950s. Big ups to JB
@@liamfitzgerald7217 yea that whole family is full of tough guys. According to Kurt Angle himself, Jon’s father in law in the meanest of the Angle brothers. Jon bernthal does a podcast and has Kurt as a guest and they talk all about it.
I clicked on this expecting a wonderful well rounded answer that talks about how good classical masculinity is but also addresses some of the classical pitfalls and was still impressed with your answer. Bravo, brother!
If there's one thing life has taught me is that the more someone struggles with pain and manages to overcome it, the more empathetic and thoughtful they can to become. Keyword being ''can'', some get changed into something horrific due to the trauma. I never really understood how some people could be so understanding and nice growing up until I went through my own share of pain and suffering, then I understood. It's not a good place, it's not a feeling I would wish on anyone. It traumatized me, it still does, but I've learned to live with it. I've learned to harness it for something good. That experience and all the subsequent work I had to put in to fix it has made me very sensitive to pain in others. It hurts me, it weights heavy on me when I see others suffer, because, deep inside, I know what that feels like and I don't want to ever again. So I help them.
One day, we’re going to figure out that toughness, resilience, compassion, empathy, etc., are not gendered traits. They are traits found in some measure in every human, regardless of sex, gender, race, etc. One of the ways to combat toxic “masculinity” is to stop talking and thinking about it AS masculinity at all. It’s just humanity.
It's interesting seeing the empathy Jon brings to his characters reflected in reality. His performance in _FURY_ is very telling - and underappreciated. For most of the movie, his character seems to be an unredeemable person, but in the "Norman, I'm sorry" scene Jon reveals an unexpected humanity bordering on tragedy. Such a rare talent.
Wow! I salute Jon for his honest opinion on role models for the modern male. I'm 40 years old and live in the Philippines I don't experience this "toxic masculinity" issue you have in the west. So I feel for my fellow "men" stay true and stay strong. Embrace masculinity but also take note what Jon said - be nice, be empathetic and stand up for those who have less!
This simply means that you, the men of the Philippines are lucky, because you did not have rabid Feminists ramming Feminism down your throats 24/7 during the last 40 years... We do not really have a "toxic masculinity" issue in the West, because "toxic masculinity" does not exist. It is just a made up Feminist buzzword that is being used to demonize and demoralise men. An advice to you men of the Philippines from me, a man who grew up in the West without ever being asked if he wants to live in a Feminist society or not: when Feminist activists will start their BS in your country, too, about the so-called "Patriarchy" oppressing women - and sooner or later it is 100% sure they will - then slap them all in the face as hard as you can. Do not even start listening to what they say, just simply slap them when they try to open their mouths. Do it! You can thank me later.
I didn't expect him to be such a quick speaker. He's very expressive and talks very quickly. I wonder if he's had people in his life that have tried to speak over him early in his life. I've had that early in my life and so I tend to make sure I get to speak.
I like what Jon mentioned about skills. Skill set does not define masculinity. I think behavior does, and toxic masculinity is an over indexing on dominance regardless of the situation. It is a negative ego driven behavior that is self destructive.
You know the absolute best of part of teaching your kids outdoor skills as Jon describes? The fact that you spent time with them doing something memorable. I guarantee you that they will have benefited from that every bit as much, if not more, as from the skills they learned in that time.
Masculinity is needed often but not all the time. It’s just self respect really. Don’t take BS from people and don’t be a push over. And always try to find a peaceful solution first
Toxic masculinity is an issue, my only issue with it is that it feels like a lot of people have been led to believe masculinity is inherently toxic, which isn’t true
indeed we don't all have to agree on every thing but we do need to listen to each other ......that is what I believe he does in his podcast Real Ones ......mostly he listens & occasionally he will ask a question to get more out of the person speaking ..I believe Jon is a gift to the world on all levels
The problem I keep seeing everywhere is SO MANY people now have been conditioned to think ANY masculinity is toxic...they think "toxic masculinity" is all there is. This is one element that's deeply confusing people, especially young men growing up in this new world of endless tribalistic aggression online and in the media etc over every possible little kind of difference. Whether people like it or not, masculinity is not only part of nature, as is femininity AND ALL THE SPECTRUM AROUND THOSE TOO, but masculinity is necessary for human society to function properly. Toxic elements of personality that can often go with certain tribalistic kinds of masculine culture is a separate issue I'm afraid. Equating the two is causing endless confusion, problems and in-fighting.
If you want to know what masculine is without subscribing to toxic masculinity, it's Jon Bernthal. Hard working, good looking dude who takes care of himself and his family while also being vulnerable and respectful. There's nothing more or less you need to be a man
Love his perspective! Totally agree with his POV. Growing up in a valley in the mountains, hunting, fishing, gardening and gathering was a way of life.
He’s a great dad, by the sound of it. My own dad might as well not been there at all. He was just a pay check. He didn’t teach me anything at all. I needed it so much that I looked for other dads from the age of 8 to help me and show me how to defend myself, to swim, to be a man. It’s taken me so long to come to terms with that.
![Felix "Unfair" | [Stray Kids : SKZ-PLAYER]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/Oswujxm2Ag0/mqdefault.jpg)
For someone who plays gruff, aggressive characters, JB remains one of the most thoughtful, charismatic, and genuine guys I've seen in showbiz. We need more Jon Bernthals in the world
In the end, you all accepted cities be burned down, so....
There are a few more like Norman Reedus and Keanu Reeves.
@@kroanosm617 norman, another cuck-like similar to jon (not in the sexual aspect)
A true role model for young men. Don't have to be an over the top prick like most males in today's media.
@@Skott-c2w he is a cuck (not in the sexual aspect)
This is perfect advice for life. The one's who are screaming the loudest and trying to show off their idea of masculinity are the most afraid and insecure of us all.
In my experience, the people who are the most secure never have to tell you about it, and certainly don't need to proclaim themselves loudly to be "alpha males". It's the same thing that actual "nice guys" are never going to need to tell you they are nice guys. It's about trying to convince people that they are a thing, to create a perception, rather than just being that thing which is actually far less work.
They do say confidence is quiet
@@shanouboubou That's horseshit. Confidence is able to be quiet, and able to be loud. And generally, it is loud.
Only two types of people are loud, confident people who know they can handle the attention, and narcissists who know they can make themselves look like the confident people.
Think about it logically, how could being loud be a way for an insecure narcissist to make themselves look confident, if it wasn't something confident people actually do? How can you pretend to be confident by being loud, if confident people are quiet?
@@thecartoonrobot so true
@@thecartoonrobot "Speak softly and carry a big stick" - TR
Similar to Keanu Reeves, Jon Bernthal knows how to act like a scary badass but in reality is an all-around nice person to be around. Very kind, very empathetic
that's really neat.
How has he not been cast in a John Wick movie?
@@GcD9179 too much toxic masculinity in those films
You can be badass and a nice person at the same time🏴☠️
@@EarthtoAdam95 that's what is meant by killing with kindness
The way he said “…someone’s who’s just SAD” tells me he’s a really empathetic guy
In the end, you all accepted cities be burned down, so....
That's growth from a wise perspective
@@forthesnowflakes7691 ruclips.net/video/jJBp_oscmqA/видео.html
Yeah that's what you need when you car has a flat tire in the rain, empathy. NO, someone needs to sack up and change the tire.
@@AFuller2020 you can have empathy and know how to change a tire. That is what he was saying.
Seeing Jon’s personality really makes you appreciate his acting. He’s so soft at times, and then you see Frank Castle, and it’s like, oh.
Same thing with Danny Trejo. He's a lovable grandpa but he grew up in that darkness and knows why that doesn't work.
In the end, you all accepted cities be burned down, so....
Frank Castle isn’t who all of the douchebags with Punisher stickers on their lifted trucks thinks he is
I remember discovering astronaut Jonny Kim on a Star Trek anniversary podcast. This guy has a ridiculous resume being a Navy SEAL, sniper, doctor, pilot. He is all smiles and comes off as a super friendly science guy that can wow the kids being an astronaut. He's on Jocko's podcast, and the military operator comes out, I'm like "whoah!".
I just saw him in _King Richard_ and he kills it as the charming extroverted tennis instructor who's on the brink of a nervous breakdown
Im always surprised by how humble and kind Jon is
That compliments his acting
He knocked someone out that almost didn’t wake up, it would humble anyone
@@hoshkotheboy yup,that story was crazy
Jon comes across like a pulp-beat slimebag who decided one day to be better and did exactly that.
@@jake_mk_0314 Yea just not on Gigilo it's awful
Jon Bernthal has been a favourite ever since the first episode of The Walking Dead. His performance as Shane was on point, and he's SO GOOD at portraying conflicted, complex characters.
I hope to see him reprise his role as Frank Castle in The Punisher in a near future.
Agreed, Shane was my favorite character because he felt so REAL to the situation they were in. Andrea (I think that was her name) too, and I stopped watching after she was killed off through stupidity. Both felt like actual humans experiencing the situation, where most characters felt like...well comic book characters, which is what they essentially are. Graphic novels, at least of the era TWD came out, were still very much marketed almost exclusively to comic book fans, so the characters still fit tropes. I mean, come on, chick with a nodachi with 2 zombies on chains...that is 100% comic book. But Shane? Felt like a real person.
I think exactly the same. That was first time I saw him on screen and immediately knew he was gonna be a big actor. He's just a good person who has his head screwed on the right way and is an unbelievable actor, and i'm sure family man. Crazy where he is now compared to that first episode of the walking dead.
@@Nick-hi9gx Season 2 was my favorite, but not the best. If u stopped watching after Andrea was killed, u missed some good TV
I love him in American Gigolo!
In the end, you all accepted cities be burned down, so....
Dude is desperately describing human decency in a way that tells me that society is failing him and his children on that idea. He seems like an absolute gem.
In the end, you all accepted cities be burned down, so....
@@namedasurname3968 I don’t actually possess any kind of dominion over fire, so when something burns down, I am forced to accept it, so...
@@JayRudolph77 no, you understand and accept that filthy narrative... so delusional that you cannot admit to have been scammed, and how all your donations went for a mansion.
@@namedasurname3968 I made no donations. Get help.
@@JayRudolph77 Hmmm this would be against the narrative that you all made during the summer of riots.... Being scammed by those frauds is just one of the many things you all deserve after accepting to let cities burn...
Hating is easy, the path of least resistance. Empathizing and accepting the unfamiliar takes actual strength.
Word
Is this your way to make ppl watch that trash Rings of Power??? I’m gonna hate it still don’t change me 😅
- Gigachad, 2022
Abuse is unfamiliar. I'm glad it's strength that I sit down and accept it. Hate isn't always weakness, and acceptance isn't always strength. grow up and chuck the mantras
@@kafkaskitchen yes edgleord, I will do what you say. Get fucked, chief.
the masculinity he instills on his children is healthy, be strong and tough and independent, because you need to be able to take care of yourself well so you can help others, it's not about being the most dominant person in the room, but to be the kindest and most reliable, someone people can lean on when they need to
In the end, you all accepted cities be burned down, so....
Being strong and tough are not masculine attributes, I know many more strong and tough women than men. Talking about major life issues, not a bar fight.
@@lucianoluggren Yes indeed they are. If they are not, then what is a masculine trait? Just being a trait can be found in both sexes does not mean that trait can't be gendered. It's simply a matter of conducing enough studies to determine which trait is more commonly found in which sex. Outliers mean very little. There is a reason why it's ALWAYS men who risk their lives to save strangers across the entire globe. That's not an accident. That's not social conditioning. Is it that hard to understand that the sex that's primarily bigger, less prone to injuries, denser bones and muscles, produces more testosterone, is more likely to be tough? Really? lol
If I tell you smoking can cause cancer, do you rebut with "oh but my grandpa smoked and he's fine!"
Aholes love empathy, it takes more than wokeness to deal with em.
@@atgrandfathersknee3065absolutely no. Is not ALWAYS the male that saves others, in fact there are thousands of women that throughout history already proved you wrong. As a man I always hated how "being tough", "working hard", "provide for the family" is always seen as a "masculine" thing or something specifically attached to a "man", because it's simply not true. In fact Is the quite opposite, since being a straight white man is the gratest privilege you can have means that a woman is most likely work 10x harder just to achieve the same thing because we still live in a patriarchy society. Because virtues are not maschuline trait, but human traits (something that apperently we all forgot).
I don't know what kind of cave in alaska are you stuck in, but I would highly suggest to go out and meet some women.
Jon's smitten by Conan. You can tell from each of his appearances that he really appreciates him.
Oh calm down there
In the end, you all accepted cities be burned down, so....
That’s the way he is watch his podcast he’s very genuine
Agreed! it's a good collaboration
I mean, Conan's the GOAT
I remember talking to a therapist about why I was struggling to reach out and form romantic relationships that lasted longer than a few months, and he managed to single out something very crucial. It turned out that the issue wasn't because of anything particularly harmful. My parents came from another country where toxic masculinity was rampant. I'd never heard my father call my mother by her first name in my entire life. I never saw them showing each other open displays of affection. So I legitimately just didn't know how to maintain a relationship with significant signs of affection to my partners. They would break it off, not because they disliked me, but because to them it just seemed like I wasn't very interested or committed.
Toxic masculinity doesn't just hurt your partners. It hurts your children, too.
Women show those traits, so its not really toxic masculinity is it?
@@theyautjawarrior6652 It's not associated with women generally which is why the generalized name. However, nothing prevents any human from doing anything harmful to another human. There are no limits in that regard - gender, race, religion, philosophy, etc. But, since most people associate "less visible feelings" with men, that's why this trait is considered a toxic masculine one. A toxic feminine trait would be a trait traditionally associated with women that has negative impacts. For example, women are sometimes known to be super competitive with each other over guys or outfits - that would be toxic.
It's just that toxic femininity doesn't tend to have the same kind of harsh outcomes that toxic masculinity does so people mostly talk about toxic masculinity as it pertains to societal problems like job wage inequality or rape.
@@MrBrock314 Wage inequality and toxic masculinity have nothing to do with each other, and lots of women rape, also sometimes being competitive with other people is a good thing
A Woman’s goal is to seek out long term relationships ours is to spread our seed. There is nothing wrong with being a man. I’m tired of this culture saying it’s a bad thing to be a man and men eating it up.
@@Garett.1214 If your only goal in life is to spread your seed that's a little depressing dude
Nobody is saying something is wrong with being a man, I'm saying that the idea that a man should try to be incredibly stoic and hide their emotions is a stupid old stereotype that should have been left behind years ago. Covering up your emotions doesn't make you strong, it makes you too afraid to be honest with the people around you. Strength is accepting your flaws and understanding they are a part of you no matter what.
I'm an 18 year old carpenter's apprentice, this last weekend I crashed my car, and the next day my 13 year old dog died. I'm working out of town (2 hours away from my home) and while I was talking to the journeyman I always work with about my situation and let him know I was thinking about asking to be taken off the job, he told me it's a man's place to take those feelings and shove them deep inside yourself, and push on for the sake of being a man. I was starting to tear up a bit but remained calm and he told me don't let anyone see you cry or they'll know you're a p*ssy. I'm very confident in my idea of masculinity and his comments haven't impacted me too deeply because I have strong male role models in my life that speak similiarly to John here. I'm continuing with the job but also seeking professional assistance as I'm starting to feel very overwhelmed. My point is that understanding and reflecting on what true masculinity is, is extremely important for young men and by extension knowing that it is okay to properly grieve, and experience emotions in general. I love hearing people be this genuine
Yeah don’t agree with the journey man at all. I’m so sorry about your dog bro. I know it’s a year late but it still stands
Jon's awesomeness knows no bounds.He's just the most down to earth guy I've ever heard speak
In the end, you all accepted cities be burned down, so....
To me it seems like the problem isn't being too Masculine or Feminine, it's defining certain skills or traits as "masculine" or "feminine". I've known dudes that'll move you to tears with their poetry and I've known chicks who can hunt and fish with the best of them... I say just let people do what they want and don't get so concerned with labels. Like Jon says, it's about being a well rounded individual, open to any new experiences... and other than that, just treat people how you want them to treat you. It's not that hard.
💯! We all need both categories in our personalities in order to be a functioning, happy adult!
You would think, and yet there's a good chunk of society that gets it wrong all the time, unfortunately.
Sounds woke 😮
Well said. During the covid lockdown I started painting my nails as an activity to do with my wife and I really liked it so I still do it. I've lost count of how many times a male coworker or family member has asked me why I paint my nails, usually in a tone of voice that sounds condescending or judgmental.
@@mastod0n1 I have a friend who paints his nails and whenever any person asks him why he does it, usually with a dickish tone as you mentioned, he just answers "because it's fun." and then moves on with his day unbothered lol works surprisingly well.
This was beautiful. It doesn't have to be a false dichotomy. You can be disciplined, tough, self reliant, and know how to defend yourself but also be humble, kind, considerate, mindful. I 100% agree with him and that's how I want to raise my son. Every interview I see him on he seems like such a cool dude.
Raise your children
One of the most powerful images of Jon is him standing with the trans flag behind him. That image speaks 1000 words. It shows that he is open to everyone, willing to take on new ideas, stand up for others, doesn't let his insecurities project on others... so much. To have a man like Jon, the typical hyper-masculine figure, stand in front of that flag... it shows that compassion for others and empathy, is ALSO a masculine trait because that should be a fundamentally HUMAN trait.
this is why he is my favorite actor, he knows what's right from wrong where to show authority to people and where to be respectful, he's such a genuine person and we need more men like this in the world, and I'm saying this as a guy and I know we aren't all great but we need to be better
And what about toxic femininity? Do women need to be better too?
@Nick Foster I think you may be confusing that with misandry and yes that is definitely another problem but stop acting like just cus women got problems doesn't mean we don't need to fix ours. Especially when those problems are already not commonly accepted as tolerable.
This rule should also apply to women: yes we exist and we give the example too: but rarely do others listen.
But we are here.
Jon came into my recent job and I served him and he was so kind! Love to see it
Hope you gave him a happy ending 😂
In the end, you all accepted cities be burned down, so....
Its no wonder this guy was so good as the Punisher. He embraces the positives of classic masculinity but is all too aware of where people end up going way too far and embracing the darker more negative elements, which is what the Punisher is.
If only the punisher sticker on the ram truck crowd were capable of seeing that (or anything at all)
@@generalveers9544 they addressed that in the comics. I think it was a couple of cops that had put a punisher skull on their squad car and showed it to him. Frank told them that if they want a role model then look at Captain America because he's not someone to look up to
@@joshritz7067 Frank hates coips. It's well documented in the comics. I should know, I'm 4 issues away from having a complete set. Yes, I'm a geek, but in this case, I'm an informed geek.
YESSSSS
I like that famous people are finally starting to talk about musculinity in positive way
Because not all forms of masculinity are toxic, that is just the perception that people have, he even pointed out an example of toxic masculinity, the blow hard that brags about being the number one tough guy it's a great example of toxic masculinity, because real men are not men of loud words they are men of action, to stand up for the little guy and protect people that can't protect themselves is a positive form of masculinity
@@onamattapeeya facts like those men make masculinity look horrible, but it is important to keep those classic values of upholding that strong image for the betterment of yourself while connecting on more emotional and emphatic levels that are equally as important for society as men. People like Andrew Tate are horrible for young men like me, but there are also slight aspects of truth that can make society ever evolving in a positive way.
@@everythinglakers1713 now that is perspective that is new to me because I was a teenager when Nirvana hit, and there was a lot of toxic masculinity , but it's important for people to distinguish between the negative and positive aspects of masculinity, standing up for the little guy or speaking up for what's right is never toxic, and it is not even exclusively masculine it is just a common trait that decent people share, almost every rule, every law, and every religion can be boiled down to one simple statement, don't be a jerk...
As they should. Young men are killing themselves at a higher rate than ever before because they have been condemned for being men and have no idea who they are supposed to be.
@@onamattapeeya The whole toxic masculinity conversation id rubbish
People need to stop worrying about masculinity and femininity and just focus on character.
Hear hear. Well said.
The ones who talk the most about masculinity and femininity are the ones who say masculinity is toxic and femininity is flexible.
You've missed the point.
@@blackphillipppp He got the point, he just disagrees with it.
@@44excalibur no he really didn't get the point.
One of the things I've always loved about Bernthal's acting is how he can portray toughness or even brutality just as well as vulnerability, often at the same time, such as in "Wind River," "Fury," or "The Accountant." It's very easy to believe he has high emotional intelligence and regard for the importance of feelings.
In the end, you all accepted cities be burned down, so....
He does that in "The Punisher", too! The character as portrayed by Bernthal is a very broken and violent man, but he still can be vulnerable and sensitive.
I remember feeling almost ashamed while watching Wind River and realizing I had unfairly stereotyped his character.
@@Beverly_Dingus That's such a good way of putting it. I now realize I had the same experience and feeling but had never framed it that way before.
Brax: Did you ever see a match-grade round travelling three thousand feet per second go through a window?
[guard standing near window drops dead as shot shatters glass]
Brax: Nobody does.
So right on... it takes courage and strength to be empathetic, in touch with your emotions and to care about other people. That's not for the weak... it takes no strength to be apathetic, cruel or pessimistic.
This guy is an example of healthy and mature masculinity
He's an example of a paid shill.
@@yarpenzigrin1893
I mean you know. He is a …. You know what I mean😂
@@Dionysos- Oy vey!
@@yarpenzigrin1893
Oy gevalt!😂
@@Dionysos- 🎵You're gonna hang like Benito from the Esso Rafters, hang like Clara with her skull caved in🎵
And then You're gonna do what Papa Adolph did when he saw what happened to them
Well-versed and nuanced parents are the key to creating a human who is in touch with every aspect of the human experience. I thank my parents every day for teaching me this every day and I’m sure John Bernthal’s kids probably feel the same way
In the end, you all accepted cities be burned down, so....
To a degree, however a snake doesn’t need to be taught how to bite, it’s simply in their nature.
@@goldsnafu ruclips.net/video/jJBp_oscmqA/видео.html
So great to hear someone speak openly about his concerns and his efforts to educate well rounded children in touch with those ideas we consider traditionally "masculine" and expressing an outright need for the "feminine" side and skill base and how a refusal to experience or express the feminine side is borne of fear and dissociation with their own fullest identity and humanity
In the end, you all accepted cities be burned down, so....
@@namedasurname3968 Can you please elaborate? I am not clear what you are trying to communicate and need a bit more to understand
@@rugbybeef Uh, you already forgot when you all accepted cities to be burned in the name of equality and peace...
Trust me bro: you'll be much better off if you express the need for the feminin side in the form of a girlfriend or a wife, and experience it in her, rather than in yourself. And it is a must if you want to have the very children who you can then educate in the first place. Traditional masculinity is what got all of your male ancestors laid throughout history.
@@urhunn7778 Right, because there have never been any women attracted to artists... Jon's mention of Samurai was perfect. I believe we are more confident and attractive humans when we are well rounded. It goes both ways too, I know plenty of men who like a woman that's ok getting her hands dirty.
That's so true. The loud guy is insecure and scared. He's loud because he's bluffing. He's thinking, maybe he can bluff confidence and arrogance so that people won't try to fight him.
He's a good role model with his message, good strong men are more needed than weak men to counter evil men, it doesn't have to be toxic
Absolutely
I met Jon years ago at my Starbucks. He had the cutest dogs! I asked him if I could pet them, and he was like absolutely. We chatted for a while and I found that he was one of the sweetest men I have ever met. He has an amazing heart!
Watching this right after the election and the fact that young men were a driving force for the results, Jon's answers ring even more true. The insecurities of men are driving us into doom and despair. We need to do better by them and teach them that being a man doesn't mean being "tough" and "strong at all costs".
No, they need to do it for themselves - that is the only way - it comes from within -
that's a lie
Jon stayed at a hotel that I worked front desk at, I took the chance to tell him that he was doing an amazing job as The Punisher. He said, "Thank you" and shook my hand.
I'm so glad The Punisher was the one to talk about this. Every "alpha bro" needs to hear this
Conan and Jon are two genuine people. Refreshing
In the end, you all accepted cities be burned down, so.... s
isn't it great to see & hear a discussion that isn't full of woke virtue signalling BS
I always thought his voice was naturally as rough as he does it in the Punisher. Cool to see just how much of a transformation that performance actually was
In the end, you all accepted cities be burned down, so....
@@namedasurname3968 is this a quote? Or just a very bizarre and unrelated comment about politics?
@@NovaBlueNova Well, not like the slogan that you all said 2 years ago... how it was? "Burn loot murder"? Hmmm no, still the summary of all your action was that
@@namedasurname3968 Is this a bot or did you just not read my comment? Where did I mention my political stance?
@@NovaBlueNova Could you be otherwise? dude, you labeled as fascist whoever didn't burn cities / supported the burning of cities, so...
I think I accidentally learned the importance of kindness early and what true kindness is. I got bullied alot and I used to just wonder why. And you know I'd come home to my parents and ask and my parents would say it's because they mistake my kindness for weakness. I was respectful and didn't horseplay and wasn't aggressive. So my kind attitude had them mistake me for a wimp. Well eventually I learned where to draw lines and when it's appropriate to be stern and when you should be kind. But I learned the difference and I think it's important. A lot of people really do equate kindness with weakness but it's not. It often takes strength to stop someone from hurting another person. It takes strength of character to know when someone is hurting and asking or trying to find a way to help. Not everyone wants to deal with people's problems. But yea there are many postive traits in masculinity but of course if used wrong well you can get the negatives. Just depends.
As a father of 3 boys, this is what im striving for. People like Jon are great role model for young boys. Keep up the good work
For young people - stop it
I think one of the biggest lessons anyone can learn is that being able to cry is an incredibly powerful skill
I agree but I also think that sometimes you have to accept that you have sadness and that your life hasn't been what you want, and to accept that as part of your life. Crying is good when you need to let it out. Sometimes it gets too much. But a better thing to do it to write out how you feel. That can get your thoughts into words and not just swimming in your head.
2:07 somebodys who’s just sad.
I love that he used the samurai as an example. When I was a teen, my parents were unavailable, so I had few wise people in my life. I read a lot of the writings of Miyamoto Musashi, and honestly, he very much believed in being balanced and well-rounded. His teachings have helped me build a very safe and balanced life for myself.
My wife is the strongest human I know. She had a terrible medical event in mexico just recently and I think we all need support and love one another. Bless to you all. I know you are all fine, but I hope the best to u all. Mailbox is still available conan.
Exactly: bravado is usually insecurity, and bullying always is.
Jon's interview with Shia Leboeuf was the best I have ever seen. So many nuggets of wisdom, so much humility and introspection.
Was that before or after Shia’s whole scandal etc.?
@@corpsefoot758 after. it was pretty recent actually
@@corpsefoot758 After. He even admits what a POS he was and all the bad things he did. The first step in any self growth.Then the story of the father and son and how the father couldn't call it.. just incredible.
After watching that interview. I concluded that Shia is just a very lost boy. And he is taking his first steps into adulthood. It's weird to see a full grown man having to go through the stuff most people go through between the ages of 12-16. There wasn't much wisdom to be found. But a lot of humility and introspection for sure.
@@glp.1337 " I concluded that Shia is just a very lost boy. And he is taking his first steps into adulthood" Freakin well said! Some men go through their whole lives not ever growing up.
Feels so good to hear someone talking about masculinity in a positive light
Jon is one of the most humble actors I've ever seen. he's so down to earth I love him for it! ever since I first saw him on TWD I was a fan. and everything he's done since then has been epic.
In the end, you all accepted cities be burned down, so....
@@namedasurname3968 what? You ok? Smelling toast by chance?
@@mrbeans2425 I mean, I know what a woman is and how many genders are there... things you cannot explain, so yeah, I'm okay, not like you
@@namedasurname3968 how many genders are there then?
@@samcochran8203 2, kiddo, 2. Now, you might start to act like the intelectual that you are not (and bending the knee to hollywood and wokeism show it), saying that there are some cases of intersex, however, those tragedies do not make it the rule, because nature speaks clears.. MALE AND FEMALES... And now... I guess you have no idea what a woman is, right?
the best men are the ones who do their best to love, protect, provide and teach their kids true right from wrong a man who stays humble and doesn't lose themselves to pride and arrogance a man who commits to staying focused always on what is important to him and keeping it safe, thriving and surviving.
I love this. Real strong men care for those that can’t take care of themselves. Protect the weak and lift up those that can’t lift up themselves. Real men lift up others. They don’t punch down on others.
His idea of being masculine is very much how I feel about it. Being strong is not just for you, but also to protect those who may not be able to protect themselves and to be kind and caring for those who may not receive those things in life.
There is maybe not one celebrity that I would love to be friends with more. He seems like such a nice guy, a really cool dude to work with from what it sounds like, and just an all-around good dude.
I interviewed Jon Bernthal years ago and he was so thoughtful. It was really telling that what lit him up wasn't talking about the movie he was there to discuss, but the charity he and his brother, Nick (a doctor), founded together called Drops Fill Buckets. Just a good person all around.
Can we just go ahead and give Jon all the awards for his performance in We Own This City?
Not until better call saul gets justice.
In the end, you all accepted cities be burned down, so....
Big ups big ups! This was Gr8!
Let’s keep seeking that balance!
As the brother of Peter Cullen (former marine himself) said, "Be strong enough to be gentle." And it's so true. It takes far more strength to be kind, to have compassion, and to not become disillusioned by the cruelty of the world than it does to just follow what your monkey brain tells you to do. That's the easy way out. Nobody gains when you're just thinking about yourself. As a species, we can only move forward if we stop and pick up the ones who fall along the way.
Being strong means being able to confront yourself, not others.
In the end, you all accepted cities be burned down, so....e
Both, actually.
This @@Jay-jq6bl
The only time it begins to be toxic is when you're oppose to someone wanting to do the opposite of what you think is "manly" if you want to raise your kid to be a hunting woodsman but he decides its not for him and he enjoys fashion instead you embrace that and support him and never scold and down him for it.
That's always been true, he is wise. The loudest one in the room is always the most insecure.
Agreed 💯💯 more young folks need to hear this.
Never mistake strength with cruelty, ambivalence, or bitterness. And never mistake femininity with weakness. The sooner people realize this, the better off we'll all be.
I would add that toxic masculinity also includes the idea that you can never be weak, depressed, sad, anxious, or tired. Men are human too. They need to remember that and we all need to remember that.
One lesson my Dad taught me about if you have to fight was the loudest guy wasn’t all that tough or was scared and hoped you’d back down. He also said the that is calm and quiet is the one you need to take seriously. He knows how to handle himself in a fight.
What Jon is very good at is being a true Gentleman,.. embracing emotions can take as much, if not more, strength as training in combative sports,..
I never saw this dude in an interview until these but I really like this guy
As a guy who wears bright colors during the summer. I’m definitely somebody you don’t need to worry about.
Not toxic masculinity but AWESOME masculinity!
In the end, you all accepted cities be burned down, so....d
I love Jon Bernthal and to expand on what he said about his guest who was a SEAL: you see this with real combat vets - they are the most compassionate and caring people because they know that all that matters is the wellbeing of the person next to you.
Discipline is an interesting word. If one refers to “disciplining their child” it often means clobbering them for misbehaving, thus bending them to a rule. If we say someone has discipline it often means they’re in control, patient and at peace. Orderly. If we say someone has learned a discipline it usually means a skill dependant on learning finer details and observations. Often mindful, valuable. How different the outcome if you educate a child with each, especially in regards to self defense, fighting, and the tough guy convo. Can create chaos, a neutral observer, or a thoughtful producer. (I think a % of each is important)
Jon is the man. I mean obviously immensely talented and all but also thoughtful and humble.
I listened to Jon on Rogan. I think he spoke about having an understanding of actual violence is a big thing. I think he used the word "relationship." It was perfect the way he said it. The people that have never experienced violence don't understand it. But it's always around us. The point is not to make people scared of it. The point is to prepare yourself as much as you can to deal with it. You'll always be scared. Just put yourself in a situation where you can defend yourself if needed.
1:40 IN THE WOODS
WHAT IS THAT AH WHAT IS THAT 🏃
This guy is a model of what positive masculinity can be. Everytime the contrast between him and his most iconic characters amazes me. He's such a luminous and sweet guy, yet tough.
Man I love this guy. He’s such an amazing human.
Jon B is a real one. His Frank Castle was brilliant. He seems like a great father. Thoughtful kind and strong at the same time. Not all masculinity is toxic. The way he talks of the samurai gardening and cooking is dope. As a masculine man I do those and other things that would be considered feminine in Americans 1950s. Big ups to JB
Jon Bernthal is a cool dude. He seems real down to earth and real nice!
Did you know he's married to Kurt Angle's niece?
@@liamfitzgerald7217 yea that whole family is full of tough guys. According to Kurt Angle himself, Jon’s father in law in the meanest of the Angle brothers. Jon bernthal does a podcast and has Kurt as a guest and they talk all about it.
In the end, you all accepted cities be burned down, so....
I clicked on this expecting a wonderful well rounded answer that talks about how good classical masculinity is but also addresses some of the classical pitfalls and was still impressed with your answer. Bravo, brother!
It is pretty sad that many young men look up to people like Andrew Tate as an example of a man.
If there's one thing life has taught me is that the more someone struggles with pain and manages to overcome it, the more empathetic and thoughtful they can to become. Keyword being ''can'', some get changed into something horrific due to the trauma. I never really understood how some people could be so understanding and nice growing up until I went through my own share of pain and suffering, then I understood. It's not a good place, it's not a feeling I would wish on anyone. It traumatized me, it still does, but I've learned to live with it. I've learned to harness it for something good. That experience and all the subsequent work I had to put in to fix it has made me very sensitive to pain in others. It hurts me, it weights heavy on me when I see others suffer, because, deep inside, I know what that feels like and I don't want to ever again. So I help them.
One day, we’re going to figure out that toughness, resilience, compassion, empathy, etc., are not gendered traits. They are traits found in some measure in every human, regardless of sex, gender, race, etc. One of the ways to combat toxic “masculinity” is to stop talking and thinking about it AS masculinity at all. It’s just humanity.
yes being a decent human has nothing to do with gender & everything to do with just being human
It's interesting seeing the empathy Jon brings to his characters reflected in reality. His performance in _FURY_ is very telling - and underappreciated. For most of the movie, his character seems to be an unredeemable person, but in the "Norman, I'm sorry" scene Jon reveals an unexpected humanity bordering on tragedy. Such a rare talent.
Wow! I salute Jon for his honest opinion on role models for the modern male. I'm 40 years old and live in the Philippines I don't experience this "toxic masculinity" issue you have in the west. So I feel for my fellow "men" stay true and stay strong. Embrace masculinity but also take note what Jon said - be nice, be empathetic and stand up for those who have less!
In the end, you all accepted cities be burned down, so....
This simply means that you, the men of the Philippines are lucky, because you did not have rabid Feminists ramming Feminism down your throats 24/7 during the last 40 years... We do not really have a "toxic masculinity" issue in the West, because "toxic masculinity" does not exist. It is just a made up Feminist buzzword that is being used to demonize and demoralise men. An advice to you men of the Philippines from me, a man who grew up in the West without ever being asked if he wants to live in a Feminist society or not: when Feminist activists will start their BS in your country, too, about the so-called "Patriarchy" oppressing women - and sooner or later it is 100% sure they will - then slap them all in the face as hard as you can. Do not even start listening to what they say, just simply slap them when they try to open their mouths. Do it! You can thank me later.
@@urhunn7778 EXACTLY
I didn't expect him to be such a quick speaker. He's very expressive and talks very quickly. I wonder if he's had people in his life that have tried to speak over him early in his life. I've had that early in my life and so I tend to make sure I get to speak.
Jon seems like a truly awesome guy.
Good dude. This is a fantastically nuanced conversation. Lots of pundits out there should listen to this
I like what Jon mentioned about skills. Skill set does not define masculinity. I think behavior does, and toxic masculinity is an over indexing on dominance regardless of the situation. It is a negative ego driven behavior that is self destructive.
You know the absolute best of part of teaching your kids outdoor skills as Jon describes? The fact that you spent time with them doing something memorable. I guarantee you that they will have benefited from that every bit as much, if not more, as from the skills they learned in that time.
He sounds like a great dad.
Masculinity is needed often but not all the time. It’s just self respect really. Don’t take BS from people and don’t be a push over. And always try to find a peaceful solution first
I'm even more of Jon Bernthal fan now
I just love Jon, he is so smart and has growth so much, each year i find him wiser.
Toxic masculinity is an issue, my only issue with it is that it feels like a lot of people have been led to believe masculinity is inherently toxic, which isn’t true
Any time Jon Berthal speaks, I listen. Whether I agree with his point of view or not, his comments are always well thought-through. He’s so genuine.
indeed we don't all have to agree on every thing but we do need to listen to each other ......that is what I believe he does in his podcast Real Ones ......mostly he listens & occasionally he will ask a question to get more out of the person speaking ..I believe Jon is a gift to the world on all levels
Jon Bernthal is very different from who I thought he would be. Dude is smart and full of wisdom.
There are people who mock this guy as "woke."
They’re keyboard warriors. They’d never say it to his face
Frank Castle talking about masculinity is astounding.
The problem I keep seeing everywhere is SO MANY people now have been conditioned to think ANY masculinity is toxic...they think "toxic masculinity" is all there is. This is one element that's deeply confusing people, especially young men growing up in this new world of endless tribalistic aggression online and in the media etc over every possible little kind of difference. Whether people like it or not, masculinity is not only part of nature, as is femininity AND ALL THE SPECTRUM AROUND THOSE TOO, but masculinity is necessary for human society to function properly. Toxic elements of personality that can often go with certain tribalistic kinds of masculine culture is a separate issue I'm afraid. Equating the two is causing endless confusion, problems and in-fighting.
If you want to know what masculine is without subscribing to toxic masculinity, it's Jon Bernthal. Hard working, good looking dude who takes care of himself and his family while also being vulnerable and respectful. There's nothing more or less you need to be a man
Even after saying all that, you know Jon bernthal is not to be messed with
He said it. The guy that smiles and shakes your hand is the one who's most serious
I appreciate that Jon ignored the "toxic masculinity" term and just talked about the meat of it. He called it the right thing, "insecurity".
Wait, John Bernthal has his own podcast series on Spotify?! How could I live so long without this?
Jon* Bernthal
Love his perspective! Totally agree with his POV. Growing up in a valley in the mountains, hunting, fishing, gardening and gathering was a way of life.
So do u agree that masculine men r good for society
He’s a great dad, by the sound of it. My own dad might as well not been there at all. He was just a pay check. He didn’t teach me anything at all. I needed it so much that I looked for other dads from the age of 8 to help me and show me how to defend myself, to swim, to be a man.
It’s taken me so long to come to terms with that.