“I’m not convinced American public schools are this badly run.” One time a speaker came to my high school to talk about “overcoming his Tourette’s” (?). A bunch of students Googled him and found out he's a sex cult recruiter so they told the principal, and he had to apologize over the PA system for not doing any background checks.
did... did no teacher bother to like... do ANY research about this guy that they were inviting to speak at their school like... not even google his name for half a second?
I love how casually she says shit like “Rape” and “School shooting” just because this book is so damn over dramatic to the point that these tragedies have no meaning in this world he created.
Two terms for this would include "Shock Fatigue" and "Diminishing Return." It's why Agony failed as a horror game because there was no calm in it. It also failed as a game in itself because the gameplay was so boring, but that's another story. This fails to shock because Don Onion is proven to be insane already.
@@s0livagant_ or that he has to make a severe amount of progress to be an actual functioning adult instead of an incredibly stunted teenager with trauma that definitely does require outside help including years maybe decades of healing but yea that wont process thru his alpha chad mind
Imagine this book but it’s written from Abby‘s perspective. She suffers domestic abuse from her father and also gets raped. Then we see her psychological trauma. She tries to find comfort from the school counselor, but when she finds out she’s pregnant and gets an abortion, the counselor turns on her. She doesn’t know how to find support, so she rushes into an relationship with jock 1. she writes him that she wants everyone to disappear. The relationship is very abusive, and she just wants out. She sees Greg as her savior and rushes into an unhealthy relationship with him where she sees him as infallible. Then the shooting happens and we she blames herself because of that note. Her dad gets arrested for drunken driving or something, so she moves in with Greg because his mum allows it. She confines in the mum who suggests she gets therapy and then sets her up with a therapist. She begins to heal and notices the unhealthy relationship between her and Greg.
a decent plot, but from a writing standpoint, its way too much trauma for one story. in writing, when those types of experiences are one after another after another, it loses its impact and gets tiring. after a certain point it starts to feel like a torture porn.
“I am convinced American schools aren’t run this bad. This has to be illegal.” In seventh grade, my bully of two years pulled a knife on me, pushed me against the lockers with the knife to my side and told me if I told on her again, she’d hunt me down and kill me. The security camera in the hallway caught it all. The vice principal told me and my mom that there was nothing he could do because “everyone is entitled to an education.” and maybe I should consider not going to the bathroom during class in case she was out in the hallway. Mom pressed charges against my bully and won. Also, my sister was also almost in a school shooting. (I had graduated from this high school three years earlier) The guy who had been beating up her and her friends sent a snapchat holding a rifle and the caption was a bunch of names and the date for the next Monday. My sister went to school early that day and cried with her friends, because she was sure that she was going to die once he showed up. I guess someone ratted him out because the police were there waiting for him once he got off the bus. He did indeed have a hunting rifle and a bowie(?) knife in his big gym bag. On a less “the school is at fault” note, my sister saw a kid die in outdoor education while snowboarding. He hit a bump wrong, broke his neck on impact, and died. At first, kids were laughing like “oh, haha Zach ate sh*t!” and when Zach didn’t get up, she said “there was this wave of ‘oh f*ck..’ that hit everyone all at once.” A lot of kids had to talk to the school councilor after that, my sister included.
Yeah sounds about right. I got stabbed through my hand in 5th grade, during fucking class. I got a bunch of stitches, shit head stabber got a one day suspension. If I though about it long enough I could probably write out 20 similar ghetto school stories.
I didn't know who Onision was going into this, so the most shocking part was about half way through when it was revealed that this was written by a 30 year old man.
@@blueshell292 That is the very rabbit hole this video sent me on! Love TRO. These 'books' get ever more disturbing the more you know about Greg IRL, huh?
I just realized this: This is a story about a marysue who's more powerful and traumatized than everyone else, who's dating a person that has issues with their past love, overly dramatic onomatopoeias, someone other than the main character doing shit while they just stand there watching, abusive parents and rape, and the main character is clearly a goth with a "nice and cheery" friend. This is My Immortal. This is what My Immortal looks like published.
Honestly thats giving Onision too much credit, at least My Immortal was somewhat entertaining and was probably written by a 14 year old writing fanfiction in their free time and not a man in his 30s who thinks his books are hot shit.
the first pages or whatever can be summarized into “i’m weird. i’m a weirdo. i don’t fit in and i don’t want to fit in. i am too intelligent for society to comprehend. i am surrounded by idiots. my name is light yagami, welcome to my ted talk.”
Going back to this after watching the review of the 4th book and knowing that Abby is based on an actual girl who rejected Greg and that's why he wrote a fucking fanfiction about her makes this whole thing infinitely creepier.
everyone being played by onision implies hiring onision and paying onision to film as an actor. Instead we should just hire tommy wiseau like PosthumanHeresy suggested
the fact that the npcs have to be nice to greg because the writer deems it necessary reminds me of the ProZD skit "when you're an NPC whose script forces you to compliment the shitty player"
Stones to Abigail, the revised version. "I'm not some broken item for you to fix Greg, my pain is not something for you to fall in love with." Greg suddenly looks very sheepish, now that it had actually been said he realized just how much of an absolute tool he was being. "You're right, I'm sorry, I shouldn't treat you like some object that I want to fix. You're a person, and I should treat you as one." And then they become friends, and Greg doesn't try and jump in her pants. This of course could only happen if Greg wasn't an absolute scumbag.
It is kinda hilarious though how he fully wrote out that first part, thought it over for at least the few seconds he would've needed to write a response, and that response was... Greg: but baaaabe, you're troma is hawt! Abby: yeah, I guess it kinda is when you put it like that!
The manchild of 40 admitted in another book Aeons covered, that "Abby" was a real person, and that person essentially did everything to avoid him after he wrote the stupid note. Which means this fucking asshat has been obsessing over the traumatized woman like it's a fetish, for the last 20+ years, to the point he wrote a sexual fantasy about a REAL person who wants nothing to do with him.
this sounds like the fanfics that me and my friends write as a joke by passing the phone around and each writing one sentence so it ends up really dramatic and rambling and with the most confusing plot ever
Morgan Hurlock it is lol. it’s fun at sleepovers at like 4 am once people are winding down a bit but still not asleep. you can do anywhere from one word each to like a paragraph each.
Tankzilla1 Games, Guitar, and Random Shit yeah they end up pretty funny. we generally use our names for the characters. the first one we wrote was pretty much my immortals level though. it’s pretty bad. we put it on wattpad under the acct @oh_no_stop lol. we wrote it last year to pass time after we finished sback testing but before the day was over when we were just sitting in the gym bored.
If I remember correctly. Onison wanted schools to use his literature for study. I will gladly do that by having my students rip his work to shreds. “Okay class. How do we fix this sentence?” “Is this how two characters would naturally react?” “And this kids, is what not to do when writing anything ever.”
i imagined a room full of random kids just like. ripping it. pages all over the desk and everything. that’d be a lot more effective than a school counselor
I like how the President reveres Greg for doing nothing while Jock actually tackled the shooter. Like, there is a student who attempted to fight the guy and save himself and his classmates but it is not Greg, Mr. President.
"I read this whole book with the exception of the sex scenes" honestly, no one asked you to or wanted you to. No one should ever have to endure that kind of pain
"Im not convinced American schools are this badly run" >DEEP BREATH< an old friend had people pay them at lunch to run into/hit kids at recess I had a teacher send me to the principal for "reading too much" Another threated to send me to the principal for reading "too fast" Before graduating, I didnt know where Russia, China, Finland, Scotland, and more were on a map, Multiple people tried to start cults during recess's Monthly school sho*ter drills This one 2nd grade teacher said she had cancer for April fools, I was in school lunch debt for years Bus driver got fired for selling coc*ine And more....
My school went into lockdown for over an hour because of a bomb threat when I was in 11th grade. One kid was getting harassed by another kid and it took months for the school to do something about it. Students would brag about fucking in the janitor’s closets. Also when my brother was in 9th or 10th grade there were 3 separate bomb threats in 3 separate bathrooms. The 3rd one was in a staff bathroom, and all the bathrooms were closed for the rest of the year.
The moral of this story is: Even if you are in an abusive relationship, and depressed and getting sexually assaulted, it can still get worse if your boyfriend is Onision
If Onion ever becomes my boyfriend (which is never in any of the 46,000,000,724 alternate timelines of this univserse), I would gladly plant ten shotgun slugs into his skull before he even thinks about asking me what my name is.
This is the literary equivalent of liking and agreeing with yourself with sock puppet accounts. Honestly, I wouldn't be surprised if he has done that already.
No no, the teacher shaming the kid for peeing under the desk part is accurate. Back in first grade (coincidentally also in art class), one of my classmates asked to go to the bathroom maybe 5 minutes into class. The teacher said no, she should have gone before, and she told her our core teacher didn't let her go either (which was true). The art teacher still refused, so she didn't go. Fast forward to the end of class, we're lining up to be escorted back to our homeroom, and someone asks why there's water on the floor. The classmate that asked to use the bathroom began crying and said "I really had to go..." and the art teacher just started yelling at her and asking her if she's a toddler, all that jazz. That isn't the only example of high key child abuse I dealt with or witnessed in school, but it's among the most ridiculous. Not letting a 6 or 7 year old go to the bathroom and then screaming at her in front of everyone when she has an accident? Classy as fuck, Mrs. Y.
The fact that your user is “Sprite” and the other person who replied is “Infires Man” is really funny to me (I’m a fellow ARMY)- Also, this is terrifyingly accurate.
Very late but about the American school system: -At one point we had to write on the back of already graded papers bc the school didn’t have any -My friend’s ovary ruptured at school and was literally dying and the nurse told her she couldn’t send people home when they have their periods -The health teacher locked a girl in a closet for a class period and wasn’t even suspended for a semester Yeah, they’re pretty batshit
Bruh I went to the nurse with severe ovary pain and an extremely heavy period (later revealed to be cysts) and she shrugged and gave me the thinnest pad. I had to go back to class, bleeding all over the place, and beg my mom to come get me.
Abby be like "I was born with glass bones and paper skin. Every morning I break my legs, and every afternoon I break my arms. At night, I lie awake in agony until my heart attacks put me to sleep."
Greg be like: My friend actually was born with glass bones and paper skin, so you making fun of it equals to you making fun of my suffering friend. Think about that
"I'm not convinced American schools are this badly run." One student at my old school tore down a poster hung up on the window outside the drama instructor's office that stated her classroom is "a safe space for LGBTQ+ youth" and threatened to bring his pastor to her office if she put it back up. She cried bc she was a relatively young teacher who didnt know how to deal with the assholery of Southern Pentecostal children who got their political ideologies from their braindead parents and then got fired for being unprofessional. A different student had a bigass confederate flag mounted to the tailgate of his truck and was never told to take it down. Recently a fight broke out at my old high school bc a visiting basketball team was comprised of mostly black students and some of our students called them the n word a bunch of times. My old school is also not IEP compliant.
Sorry you had to live in the deep south. However, please don't use the south as an example of the US. Most of the US isn't as bad as the south is (despite Republicans hard work trying to drag the rest of the country down)
@@alecmullaney7957 and even then there’s a lot of good to the south, racist white people do NOT represent all of the south. Southern culture can be beautiful and was created mainly by poc, especially black people. And also the rest of America that isn’t the south can be just as racist, homophobic, transphobic, sexist, ableist, etc. Coming from someone who’s always lived in the north and traveled in both the north and south. Being a very visibly trans gay disabled person who’s very flamboyant I kinda get treated like trash everywhere. Yeah maybe parts of the south are definitely worse, but I feel like a lot of people in the rest of the country love to just point to the south to deflect from the fact that they’re extremely bigoted and unsafe as well. It’s really the whole country. Our country isn’t built for anyone that’s not a cishet, able bodied, neurotypical white man.
Milada Schekoldin onion boy is the best mary sue, featuring such events as the president came to my school and appreciates me and raised the schools funding and everuone clapped
I'm late to the party but I once had a teacher fail me for an entire school year by "losing" my papers and then losing literal folders of that quarters redone work. He was quitting due to heart problems so my school counselor told me to quit complaining. The American education system is BEYOND poorly run
"I would not trust this woman with a god damn gerbil, never mind children's futures, and I have known her for two paragraphs." I love this sentence... so much.
"american high schools can't be this bad" my school had two bomb threats, a shooting threat, a crumbling building, numerous drug scandals with dogs being brought to the building, three hospitalizations, a teacher hit a kid and taped another's mouth shut but still being brought back, and three teachers put on leave for racism all within the span of a year and a half.
amazing grill It doesn’t really matter tho. Insulting someone’s appearance isn’t ok(unless they started it first I guess), especially as retaliation to constructive criticism. It makes you look both weak and like an asshole.
@YourCommonLoser Ok I don't watch his videos so maybe I'm misinterpreting but did he actually make a freaking video rating the beauty of women on a scale of 1-10.
this book becomes way worse when you think about his latest book and you learn that he didn't actually get together with the girl he based this book on. he wrote her a weird letter, she got mad at him, and they never spoke again. she has no personality because greg literally didn't know anything about her. he saw one girl who brutally rejected him and decided to write a self insert fanfic in his 30s about a girl he knew of in grade school.
To be clear, people with ASPD are capable of empathy. There are multiple forms of empathy, if I'm correct most "sociopaths" (not even the right term) use cognitive empathy.
That line is basically "oh, yes, the floor here is made out of f l o o r", but with Gerg trying to throw in some r/im14andthisisdeep. His writing makes my (thankfully never published) wattpad harry potter fan fiction I wrote when I was 12 look like amazing literature.
@Emily Barclay Cool hahaha I call him Gerg since GREG is already the name of the fastest growing army on RUclips (or Danny Gonzalez' fanbase), also Greg is the first name from a RUclipsr I quite like, Armoured Skeptic, and best, the name Gerg just sounds like something a swamp beast who destroyed his own swamp would be named, which fits amazingly.
That’s like the most pretentious thing I’ve ever heard. He’s like John Lennon. He says a lot of pretentious crap, thinking he’s deep and intellectually superior to everyone. The only difference is John Lennon’s pretentious crap at least sounded deep at 1st before you sat down to think about it. Onision just makes everybody face palm.
This reminded me of Diary of a Wimpy Kid (sociopathic unaware self-insert lead, cinnamon roll best friend, pretty love interest main character is obsessed with). At least in Diary of A Wimpy kid they acknowledged Greg’s shitty actions, even if there weren’t any consequences for them, and gave the side characters a personality outside of Greg.
It’s onion soup in a shallow, parking lot puddle. No layers, no nuance, just the fact that if you trip on it your feet will smell like onions and you’ll eat shit because no only is this a slippery surface, it’s a slippery surface that hates you and everyone else who is not Greg-
“A sad backstory and arousing arms” The tragic part is that you have described not only Abbi to a T, but also every other love interest in his books and about half the characters
Yes! No matter what, you have to change the dialogue when a character speaks. Another error, he has super cold writing. He needs to use some descriptive phrases. Jesus.
One thing I noticed as an older adult: No matter how batshit off the rails crazy a story from a teenage perspective is, they do have a good, hard grasp on their teachers. A lot of these people are questionable, and the kids know. It's their reality, and they have to move around in it, and just have to accept stuff that would be outrageous in the workplace.
I was the edgy loner kid with poor social skills who got bullied in school, but I never had this pathetic of a fantasy about getting the perfect girl, saving her from the abusive boyfriend, ect. Compared to Onion boy I'm a chad and I find that terrifying
Her: The grammar is wrong, the plot isn't that great, the characters are poorly written, and some of the things don't make a lot of sense Greg: So you're literally making fun of my friend who died, apologise to me right now
coming back to this after hearing you read his "autobiography" has to be the wildest trip ive taken this year. hoping the girl he based this on never finds out because how uncomfortable 😭
It's wild and I love it lol Makes it similar to watching a series or book after knowing the great Twist and going back to seeing all the little clues Just in this case it's not clues, but Onionboy being unimaginably pathetic
They managed to bust out a fucking golden quote like that for *Spy Kids* but we can’t get a semi-coherent sentence out of Onion Boy. Holy Shi...itake mushrooms.
@@ollisayshi9017 It sure is 😂 I feel like the dude who said that line tho was like. Cloning dinosaurs on an island???? smth like that 😂 Can't quite remember but it was very strange. The entire Spy Kids series was... very strange.
Friendly reminder that Onision described his character in the book as a "better version of himself". This creep is supposed to be better than the real Onision...
@Alex Evans Yes. If you look at the descriptions of each book in the Onion Boy trilogy, he explains how all of them were inspired by his youth; and how the protagonist in each one is a different interpretation of himself. In this one the protagonist is supposed to be him, but better, so that he can do more dramatic or important stuff. In the next book, the hero's supposed to be "the worst version of himself" even though the book still portrays him as being smarter than everyone else, and it even ends with one character saying he was the best man she ever knew. Then the Final book, where he has a teenage girlfriend when he's a child and kills God is supposed to be the truest version of himself. I wish I was making this up.
Guy of Minimal Importance hmm and I thought it might be a bit too weird writing myself into a scene of a story I’m writing as some drunk passed out alone on a bar table, and that was it for the character. But now i feel a lot better about that. The story is fantasy grimdark comedy if anyone was wondering for context
@Average Awesome Just having a cameo in your own book wouldn't be that weird, especially if it's just a one off thing and not a major plot point. the concept of a self insert is not fundamentally flawed. Honestly even writing a fictional memoir of sorts like this where a fictional character like you goes through similar events that you did would still be fine. The important thing about a story like this is that it has to be written without ego, acknowledging the flaws of your personality as well as your strengths, explaining how you became the person you are today. It honestly can be a good tool for self discovery by applying your own circumstances to a fictional character and seeing how you think of them from a third person perspective. The problem with Onion Boy's books is that all of his self inserts are portrayed as perfect; characters go out of their way to acknowledge how great he is and praise him. for God's sake he wrote in a chapter where the POTUS arrives and calls him a national hero. Most importantly his protagonists never change; despite being a coming of age story "James" never grows as a person, he's perfect from start to finish. In the next book his self insert is just a cool edgy boy who's morally questionable actions are only seen as sexy and defiant of cultural norms, in his final book his main character becomes more powerful than God himself, defeating both God, The Grim reaper, God's backup self; and then reforming all of creation to his design without ever making a wrong decision. A well written self insert gives an author a reason to reexamine themselves as a person, or simply express thier passion for something. His self inserts just serve to demand praise form the reader.
"every man in her life is clearly disgusting and abusive, except for Greg who can do no wrong..." cut to OnionBoy pelting Shiloh with candy corn & harassment while laughing at her misery
i to would like to believe american schools aren’t this bad, but here are some tales from my two years of junior high alone: (TW for suicide attempts, drugs, SA, and teen pregnancy) -girl got pregnant halfway through her 8th grade year -we went on lock down twice (once because someone said they we gonna shot their ex girlfriend, and the other time because someone said they were gonna set off a bomb at third period) -had the fire alarm pulled at least once a week -one kid i knew but wasn’t friends with ended up being a rapist and then he switched schools -i once hear our dean say “g*d i hate children” (great career choice lauren!) -girl got jumped and stabbed outside the school -kids would just,,, walk off campus,,, in front of teachers,,, the oldest kids there were 14 -teacher would regularly yell at kids to the point they would break down crying and he only got tiered after he called a kid the n word -my friend regularly got death threats after they were outed as trans and when he brought this up to the school with the names of people who have been threatening him they told him to just “deal with it” -kids would bear knuckle box at the park down the street every day after school, sometimes they would also do it in the bathrooms (they all sucked at it) -one of my friends got expelled and went to juvie for selling meth on school grounds -i knew 6 different kids who tried to kill themselves (lucky none of them succeed) -kids would regularly steal from the teachers -they had to close off the private practice rooms in the music building because kids were smoking weed (honestly the tamest thing that happened in there lmao) -some kid set a trash can on fire after they panicked and threw their juul in there after teachers went in to search the bathroom -kid passed bout pot brownies at lunch right before we all started state testing -dudes would stand outside the school passing out these tiny bibles to the students trying to convert them -school nurse would often insult people when they came in for anything saying that we should be able to just deal with it. (one kid came in with a broken ankle and she gave him ice and made him go back to PE) -one girl physically assaulted our vice principal -teachers would make girls come up to the front of the class and bend over to check skirt lengths -and there are a bunch of other stories about shit kids did off of campus but that a whole different (and worse!) ballgame (also i was a student assistant in the office so i probably hear about more things then other student but holy shit, that school was hell)
Wow, he really is an onion! He's bitter and unlikable, but then you start peeling back the layers and realize it's just the same thing and start crying.
I wrote a book called Outcasts when I was 13 and self published it on Amazon and Kindle when I was 17 and it’s still better than all of Onision’s books combined... this may say something about his intellect...
this is an inspirational video to me, as someone with adhd and dyslexia, the thought of writing a story always seemed impossible. but hey, it couldn't be worse than this, so there's that.
Okay, but imagine if the whole “everyone is just Greg in a different wig” concept was intentional. With just the slightest bit of editing, this could have been made into a story about an unreliable narrator, rather than just being Onision’s power trip.
If the author wasn't Greg and the whole "I'm better than everyone and all of the characters worship the streets I walk on" thing was intentional, this could be an actual good book.
@Miasma that would be a great dark comedy if you ask me. Just a delusional man who thinks everyone worships the ground he walks on when really he’s stalking all his friends and this girl Abby
I agree. But the narrator (Greg) isn’t emphasized to be insane or unreliable enough in the book to warrant this. It would require a heavy bit of editing in order to cement that theory.
"I am not convinced that American public high schools are this badly run" HA the stories I could tell. My middle school principal screamed at a bunch of 6th graders for not knowing what to do in a fire drill (this was because no one told them what to do), I got yelled for the majority of my lunch period when I was in 8th grade by a supervisor because someone tried to steal my yearbook (you'd think there would be more to that story but not really), and I've had more than one teacher on separate occasions publicly announce to the class that they hate kids, teaching, and us (idk why they became a teacher. And there are many, many, more stores... So yeah.
When you said "we're only halfway through this book" I nearly choked on my fries because there have already been 12 PLOT LINES ALREADY THIS IS WORSE THAN RIVERDALE
"Your bones were not shaken, Gregory!" I love that. Also I commented this on another video I think, but like... they never explain how in the actual fuck the shooter recovered from being *punched in the throat by an adult* Like... that would lay out a full on adult into a paroxysm of coughing and trying to recover, but apparently Teen Shooter™ just went "ok boomer" and shot mcteacher, somehow.
"every character is Greg in a different wig" I died imagining that
Gaia Semiglia , that’s basically his videos so that’s basically his book 😂
Yep
I’m contemplating suing Æons for the years of therapy this will cpst me
That's how I pictured what she's describing. I picture him in different wigs just like his videos 🤦😭😂
When I heard that it reminded me of friendlyjordies
My favorite poem of all time:
"I saw some blood,
And my classmates are dead,
But most importantly, there's a girl in my bed."
r/BootTooBig
It's a crippled haiku (i think that's how it's spelled?)
@@barrywhiteofnewyork5949 It's probably naïve to think that he would give head
@@alexv3357 So no head?
**Slams phone, stomps skateboard**
lel
“I’m not convinced American public schools are this badly run.”
One time a speaker came to my high school to talk about “overcoming his Tourette’s” (?). A bunch of students Googled him and found out he's a sex cult recruiter so they told the principal, and he had to apologize over the PA system for not doing any background checks.
did... did no teacher bother to like... do ANY research about this guy that they were inviting to speak at their school like... not even google his name for half a second?
At least he apologized
@@froglegstastebestsalted yeah i guess, but the fact that he did ZERO background check before letting someone into the school speaks volumes to me
I'm like very curious now who this dude was??? Did this news blow up locally??
Was this someone local or associated with nxivm or esp? I’ve heard of former members shilling their own versions of the curriculum so just curious.
I love how casually she says shit like “Rape” and “School shooting” just because this book is so damn over dramatic to the point that these tragedies have no meaning in this world he created.
It really drives home how little he actually cares about the problems he talks about
@@arizonagreenbee this
Two terms for this would include "Shock Fatigue" and "Diminishing Return." It's why Agony failed as a horror game because there was no calm in it. It also failed as a game in itself because the gameplay was so boring, but that's another story. This fails to shock because Don Onion is proven to be insane already.
@@WillieMangashock fatigue, that was the term. Thanks!
When I clicked on this video I was NOT expecting heterosexual traumacore Obama fanfic
This comment was a 1-hit K.O.
@@AB-qt2kh Agreed
The straights are not sending us their best Onion boys.
@@smileymctrashbag The Onion man was merely a quality control error. Rest assured, we take great pride in the products we make here at StraightCo
Same here ;-;
"Now we have arrived at the school shooting scene"
Wait what?
"He took his roller blades off"
Wait double what?
FleshyMeatSac This may or may not relate to this but Lola is that you?
@@Only_Yours_ lola?
Be kind to my mind and please rewind... to the point that Onision doesn't exist.
Odd Eyes94 onion boy*
my man skates to a school bang bang shooty literally
"I read Onision's entire book."
You shouldn't be encouraging self-harm.
@@katatonikbliss bruh wtf😟
@@katatonikbliss sir this is a McDonald's
@@katatonikbliss omg greg????
@@Canned-Tomato-Basil-Soup the joke is Greg
@@yowieyahoo tf did they say??
So who's gonna tell him that trauma isn't a personality trait?
I’m not gonna tell him bro
You can tell him, but he's not gonna listen.
I mean it would be a waste of time cause yk his skull is too thick for him to comprehend he isn’t perfect
@@s0livagant_ or that he has to make a severe amount of progress to be an actual functioning adult instead of an incredibly stunted teenager with trauma that definitely does require outside help
including years maybe decades of healing
but yea that wont process thru his alpha chad mind
This is an attack on D&D rogues everywhere
“This girl’s life is just trauma bingo.” Best quote in the whole goddamn video
2326_543337 idk broski “he just rollerskates into a school shooting” is a banger too lmao
"Every character is greg in a wig." is iconic
*_HELLO SON. COME HAVE SOME LENTILS FOR DINNER_*
Honestly every sentence in this video is extremely quoteable
2326_543337 I feel like that’s my life lmaooo “trauma bingo” absolutely. My trauma list quote. “Don’t be shy, add some more”.
All the dislikes are onision in different wigs
TheBriBoat LMAO
i laughed wayyy too hard at this lol
Damn 2.8k wigs
When we see Onision on the courtroom and everyone watching is Kai and Greg is the Judge
I literally gave you your one thousand and hundredth like
Imagine this book but it’s written from Abby‘s perspective. She suffers domestic abuse from her father and also gets raped. Then we see her psychological trauma. She tries to find comfort from the school counselor, but when she finds out she’s pregnant and gets an abortion, the counselor turns on her. She doesn’t know how to find support, so she rushes into an relationship with jock 1. she writes him that she wants everyone to disappear. The relationship is very abusive, and she just wants out. She sees Greg as her savior and rushes into an unhealthy relationship with him where she sees him as infallible. Then the shooting happens and we she blames herself because of that note. Her dad gets arrested for drunken driving or something, so she moves in with Greg because his mum allows it. She confines in the mum who suggests she gets therapy and then sets her up with a therapist. She begins to heal and notices the unhealthy relationship between her and Greg.
that... actually sounds like a really good plot-
I'd read that
i would probably read that
I would definitely read that
a decent plot, but from a writing standpoint, its way too much trauma for one story.
in writing, when those types of experiences are one after another after another, it loses its impact and gets tiring. after a certain point it starts to feel like a torture porn.
“I am convinced American schools aren’t run this bad. This has to be illegal.”
In seventh grade, my bully of two years pulled a knife on me, pushed me against the lockers with the knife to my side and told me if I told on her again, she’d hunt me down and kill me. The security camera in the hallway caught it all. The vice principal told me and my mom that there was nothing he could do because “everyone is entitled to an education.” and maybe I should consider not going to the bathroom during class in case she was out in the hallway. Mom pressed charges against my bully and won.
Also, my sister was also almost in a school shooting. (I had graduated from this high school three years earlier) The guy who had been beating up her and her friends sent a snapchat holding a rifle and the caption was a bunch of names and the date for the next Monday. My sister went to school early that day and cried with her friends, because she was sure that she was going to die once he showed up. I guess someone ratted him out because the police were there waiting for him once he got off the bus. He did indeed have a hunting rifle and a bowie(?) knife in his big gym bag.
On a less “the school is at fault” note, my sister saw a kid die in outdoor education while snowboarding. He hit a bump wrong, broke his neck on impact, and died. At first, kids were laughing like “oh, haha Zach ate sh*t!” and when Zach didn’t get up, she said “there was this wave of ‘oh f*ck..’ that hit everyone all at once.” A lot of kids had to talk to the school councilor after that, my sister included.
Rest in peace zach
What the actual fuck, that sounds like a living nightmare
@@echomikoart
It's cause it is.
Yeah sounds about right. I got stabbed through my hand in 5th grade, during fucking class. I got a bunch of stitches, shit head stabber got a one day suspension.
If I though about it long enough I could probably write out 20 similar ghetto school stories.
The most that happened at my school is that a kid tried to stab another kid with a pair of scissors
And nothing happened to him
Teachers sucked though
"Your bones are not shaking, Gregory." Is the most underrated quote in all of lesbian history.
m.ruclips.net/video/wxm8jTzU_8o/видео.html
Pugmaster 1316 this is .. threateningly scary
Karma Good.
Pugmaster 1316 wow onision did that. That is super scary.
I think "So... Obama's in this story now" is worth mentioning too
This book is seriously the "I'm 14 and this is deep" meme unironically.
Uncle Jimbo LMAOO
Uncle Jimbo okay but it also feels like that “just another day in the life of Jemmy Nutrun 👂👁👄👁👂” video unironically
Yeah, the pretension level is off the spectrum
@Zᴀᴛᴛᴇ Cᴏʀɪᴇ I'm 34 but act like I'm 14 and this is deep
@@magiconic I'm 34 and I'm attracted to 14 yr olds and this is deep
I didn't know who Onision was going into this, so the most shocking part was about half way through when it was revealed that this was written by a 30 year old man.
I recommend the three videos going in-depth on Onision by The Right Opinion, of you wanna torture yourself.
@@blueshell292 That is the very rabbit hole this video sent me on! Love TRO. These 'books' get ever more disturbing the more you know about Greg IRL, huh?
If I were drinking coffee I would've spit it all over my phone at that revelation.
HE’S A WHAT
@@Lincoln_Bio Like how he is talking about women and children, when he is a father. With a daughter
I just realized this:
This is a story about a marysue who's more powerful and traumatized than everyone else, who's dating a person that has issues with their past love, overly dramatic onomatopoeias, someone other than the main character doing shit while they just stand there watching, abusive parents and rape, and the main character is clearly a goth with a "nice and cheery" friend.
This is My Immortal. This is what My Immortal looks like published.
Self-published, just so that we're clear
Honestly thats giving Onision too much credit, at least My Immortal was somewhat entertaining and was probably written by a 14 year old writing fanfiction in their free time and not a man in his 30s who thinks his books are hot shit.
@@coffeewolfproductions9113 yeah, my immortal was endearingly bad. Onion’s book is just bad
@@coffeewolfproductions9113 is he actually in his 30s?
To be fair, it is pretty much the same level of "Published" as my immortal is - no publishing company ever laid a finger on this
There’s like four characters in this book, Greg, not Greg, teacher, and Jock. Everyone is just a copy of one of those.
The Flowering Inferno wait, don’t forget the cardboard female
Bella ah yes, I forgot
"Not Greg" 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
Can’t forget “barely sentient feeemoid love object”.
And traumatized one dimensional love interest
the first pages or whatever can be summarized into “i’m weird. i’m a weirdo. i don’t fit in and i don’t want to fit in. i am too intelligent for society to comprehend. i am surrounded by idiots. my name is light yagami, welcome to my ted talk.”
this comment gives me life
“*you ever wonder why i wear this stupid hat all the time??*”
r/iamverysmart ahaha
Mia Chabaud lmao i give it 2 hours till we end up on that subreddit
Mia Chabaud onision is that whole subreddit personified
Going back to this after watching the review of the 4th book and knowing that Abby is based on an actual girl who rejected Greg and that's why he wrote a fucking fanfiction about her makes this whole thing infinitely creepier.
OH MY GOD. 😨 greg is a fucking weirdo
This is more pathetic than creepy considering she had the brain cells to see the obvious
WHAT
Oh absolutely not
Davis: I LOVE I WISH YOU WERE MY BOYFRIEND
greg: ah yes my best buddy friend he was just friendly JOKING
Sapho and her *friend* vibes
Look at us, kissing like F R I E N D S
Historians will say they were just friends
@@Life-uu5yo Do you know 'Empress Theresa', the only book in existence
that can RIVAL Onision?!?
?
"Little friendship kiss there"
Someone give this woman an award for actually reading this self insert nightmare
Preach
Also you notice that the narrator is a stalker and narcissist
this video took so much effort
She’s the hero we need, but not the one we deserve.
It sounds painful
@@SoilderKrizer You think That's bad? Poor Jaclyn Glen pity dated the emo onion...
>_>
"Am I going to read any of his other books?"
"N O"
recommended for you: the next two books
I've watched this series so many times but I love it so much-
StardustSunset same it’s so addicting to watch dsahfjad
I think this is my 4th or 5th time
i've practically memorized these videos
@@ReiAnikaAyanami Same.
I want you to know that my entire family qoutes "Hello, son. Come have some l e n t i l s for DINNER" EVERY DAY
As they should✨
"Vaguely woman shaped cardboard cut out of a person" is The best sentence I've ever heard
I love all the "then everyone clapped" moments lol
Throckmorton 😭
The whole book is a giant r/thathappened
It has the "and they were roomates" vine guy energy
Finally, I am reunited with Throkmorton, my skater cousin.
I want a movie adaptation of this book where everyone's played by onision in different wigs with a budget of 5$ and a rubber band
It would be a box office bomb, but have a cult following because people would make fun of it a lot
Everyone played by Tommy Wiseau playing Greg doing it. It'll be far better made.
You mean his channel?
@@caisis4929 yeah but with crappy special effects
everyone being played by onision implies hiring onision and paying onision to film as an actor. Instead we should just hire tommy wiseau like PosthumanHeresy suggested
the fact that the npcs have to be nice to greg because the writer deems it necessary reminds me of the ProZD skit "when you're an NPC whose script forces you to compliment the shitty player"
Stones to Abigail, the revised version.
"I'm not some broken item for you to fix Greg, my pain is not something for you to fall in love with."
Greg suddenly looks very sheepish, now that it had actually been said he realized just how much of an absolute tool he was being. "You're right, I'm sorry, I shouldn't treat you like some object that I want to fix. You're a person, and I should treat you as one."
And then they become friends, and Greg doesn't try and jump in her pants.
This of course could only happen if Greg wasn't an absolute scumbag.
It is kinda hilarious though how he fully wrote out that first part, thought it over for at least the few seconds he would've needed to write a response, and that response was...
Greg: but baaaabe, you're troma is hawt!
Abby: yeah, I guess it kinda is when you put it like that!
The manchild of 40 admitted in another book Aeons covered, that "Abby" was a real person, and that person essentially did everything to avoid him after he wrote the stupid note.
Which means this fucking asshat has been obsessing over the traumatized woman like it's a fetish, for the last 20+ years, to the point he wrote a sexual fantasy about a REAL person who wants nothing to do with him.
"i read onision's entire book"
not all heroes wear capes
this one wears glasses though, that's close enough
But she wears her own son as a scarf 😉
I think she should wear a cape. It would suit her.
Truly a modern hero
All gave some, some gave all. Aeon gave all.
this sounds like the fanfics that me and my friends write as a joke by passing the phone around and each writing one sentence so it ends up really dramatic and rambling and with the most confusing plot ever
This sounds like an epic party game omg
Morgan Hurlock it is lol. it’s fun at sleepovers at like 4 am once people are winding down a bit but still not asleep. you can do anywhere from one word each to like a paragraph each.
That sounds like it would write better than this book
Tankzilla1 Games, Guitar, and Random Shit
yeah they end up pretty funny. we generally use our names for the characters. the first one we wrote was pretty much my immortals level though. it’s pretty bad. we put it on wattpad under the acct @oh_no_stop lol. we wrote it last year to pass time after we finished sback testing but before the day was over when we were just sitting in the gym bored.
@@finch4309 found it. Is it the one with surprised Pikachu as the profile pic?
Are we completely sure that this book isn't just an extremely exaggerated "Obama was there" meme?
Consider: This book, but with the weird prophetic Obama from Tumblr dreams randomly
then perish
@@arizonagreenbee You mean those dreams where he just shows up with a cigarette, says some poignant stuff, and wanders off?
If I remember correctly. Onison wanted schools to use his literature for study. I will gladly do that by having my students rip his work to shreds. “Okay class. How do we fix this sentence?” “Is this how two characters would naturally react?” “And this kids, is what not to do when writing anything ever.”
i imagined a room full of random kids just like. ripping it. pages all over the desk and everything. that’d be a lot more effective than a school counselor
@@thefoxandthehound81 now THAT! my good person. Is a wonderful idea! 😁
“Now children, this is what NOT to do when writing a book”
Woukd be a good book for moral studies
He’s basically just writing fanfictions about himself.
It's because no one does it so he has to boost himself you know 🤣🤣🤣🤣
Kitty Kat Hahaha
Honestly true
Karen why aren’t you at your antivaxx parade?
Even fanfics have standards.
the real hero here was the bus driver who saw a chance to save us from Greg and he took it
Agree.
Yepp
The thing is, that makes infinitely more sense than the bus driver actually letting him off into the shooting for literally any other reason.
OFF TOPIC BUT I LIKE YOUR SHI QINGXUAN PROFILE PIC!!
@@ihatetwinks99 THANK YOU
I like how the President reveres Greg for doing nothing while Jock actually tackled the shooter. Like, there is a student who attempted to fight the guy and save himself and his classmates but it is not Greg, Mr. President.
"I read this whole book with the exception of the sex scenes" honestly, no one asked you to or wanted you to. No one should ever have to endure that kind of pain
~Normal angsty book plot~
"Now we have arrived at the school shooting scene"
THE *WHAT*
+
Sounds like something Onision would write.
@@confusedaf1112 he's the exact type of edgelord to do that
You know a book is angsty when the school shooting scene isn’t even halfway over
Did u mean thirteen reasons why
bus driver was trying to end the book early
I wish he would have succeeded
@@jellycoolreader9796 Do you know all of Onisions Books?
And even if: Do you know 'Empress Theresa'?
Morally this is a horrible comment, but dark humor is always fucking funny
@@toakongu1 it aint immoral if the person you want dead is an onision lookalike
"Im not convinced American schools are this badly run"
>DEEP BREATH<
an old friend had people pay them at lunch to run into/hit kids at recess
I had a teacher send me to the principal for "reading too much"
Another threated to send me to the principal for reading "too fast"
Before graduating, I didnt know where Russia, China, Finland, Scotland, and more were on a map,
Multiple people tried to start cults during recess's
Monthly school sho*ter drills
This one 2nd grade teacher said she had cancer for April fools,
I was in school lunch debt for years
Bus driver got fired for selling coc*ine
And more....
My school went into lockdown for over an hour because of a bomb threat when I was in 11th grade.
One kid was getting harassed by another kid and it took months for the school to do something about it.
Students would brag about fucking in the janitor’s closets.
Also when my brother was in 9th or 10th grade there were 3 separate bomb threats in 3 separate bathrooms. The 3rd one was in a staff bathroom, and all the bathrooms were closed for the rest of the year.
The local highschool had to cancel everything and stand outside of the school because of a threat made towards a student
And that’s just last week!
A bus drove into our school once and everyone laughed about it even though people were in the hospital
@@thequeenofcringe1585 "three separate bomb threats in three separate bathrooms" is inexplicably hilarious to me
as someone named Abigail, seeing that he spelled it like "Abbigale", makes me want to forcefully tear out my brain
I would be happy it's not the same as mine lol
if onision named a "love" intrest in one of his books anything similar to my name im changing it
@@quinn.0 yeah
As a fellow Abigail I vibe with this
@@abidizzne892 heck yeah
The moral of this story is:
Even if you are in an abusive relationship, and depressed and getting sexually assaulted, it can still get worse if your boyfriend is Onision
Hünré It’s time to leave before your boyfriend *turns into Onision.*
It’s time to leave before *you become onision*
Omg 😂😂😂 i lost it at this
If Onion ever becomes my boyfriend (which is never in any of the 46,000,000,724 alternate timelines of this univserse), I would gladly plant ten shotgun slugs into his skull before he even thinks about asking me what my name is.
@@Anino_Makata sounds like you like king onion
*This book is just Greg trying to compliment himself through different characters.*
Aren’t all of his books, though?
@@thequeenofcringe1585 I haven’t read them but I wouldn’t doubt it.
In a nutshell
These books are just a way for Onision to stroke his own fragile ego
his real name is james so definitely
This is the literary equivalent of liking and agreeing with yourself with sock puppet accounts. Honestly, I wouldn't be surprised if he has done that already.
No no, the teacher shaming the kid for peeing under the desk part is accurate. Back in first grade (coincidentally also in art class), one of my classmates asked to go to the bathroom maybe 5 minutes into class. The teacher said no, she should have gone before, and she told her our core teacher didn't let her go either (which was true). The art teacher still refused, so she didn't go.
Fast forward to the end of class, we're lining up to be escorted back to our homeroom, and someone asks why there's water on the floor. The classmate that asked to use the bathroom began crying and said "I really had to go..." and the art teacher just started yelling at her and asking her if she's a toddler, all that jazz.
That isn't the only example of high key child abuse I dealt with or witnessed in school, but it's among the most ridiculous. Not letting a 6 or 7 year old go to the bathroom and then screaming at her in front of everyone when she has an accident? Classy as fuck, Mrs. Y.
"Arousing Arms" is the new name for my mid-2000s style emo band.
pfff
That's a pretty cool band name
He has the mindset of someone who never left their edgy angsty teen phase
The accuracy is scary
The fact that your user is “Sprite” and the other person who replied is “Infires Man” is really funny to me (I’m a fellow ARMY)-
Also, this is terrifyingly accurate.
@@lilacamaris518 I hate snakeu 🐍
Hey that's doing angsty teens dirty
i feel like the phase just got worse for him
Abby or abbi sounds like she could get adopted by one direction in a Wattpad fan fiction
Peter Matchim PFFFFTT I- 🗿
@@masonbrushwood4242 I think that's an insult to one Direction Wattpad FanFictions.
Definitely! She also sounds like a “aw, man, dad sold me into slavery again!” Character lol
N O O N E I S S A F E
Why do I know exactly what you're talking about this is insulting-
"Your bones were not shaken, *Gregory,"*
A quote I never knew I needed, nor did I know I wanted it, and yet, somehow, it completes me.
Very late but about the American school system:
-At one point we had to write on the back of already graded papers bc the school didn’t have any
-My friend’s ovary ruptured at school and was literally dying and the nurse told her she couldn’t send people home when they have their periods
-The health teacher locked a girl in a closet for a class period and wasn’t even suspended for a semester
Yeah, they’re pretty batshit
late to your late comment - but omg all of that sounds awful and I hope your friend was okay!
Bruh I went to the nurse with severe ovary pain and an extremely heavy period (later revealed to be cysts) and she shrugged and gave me the thinnest pad. I had to go back to class, bleeding all over the place, and beg my mom to come get me.
Here's hoping you can leave the south and move to a part of the USA that isn't a part of the 3rd world
What area of the US?
@@kittencorp.3295 the south, clearly
Abby be like "I was born with glass bones and paper skin. Every morning I break my legs, and every afternoon I break my arms. At night, I lie awake in agony until my heart attacks put me to sleep."
Amy thechubbylittlesatan i love that episode o f Spongebob im crying. It’s true tbh.
I'm a writer... and Greg's formatting is appalling. EVERY CHARACTER IN A PARAGRAPH GETS THEIR OWN LINE OF DIALOGUE EACH TIME THEY SPEAK. UUUUGGGGHHHH
Greg be like: My friend actually was born with glass bones and paper skin, so you making fun of it equals to you making fun of my suffering friend. Think about that
5 words in and I instantly knew this was a spongebob reference.
Bob Sponge
The real question is who was the poor gay child that had a crush on Greg when he was in high school who got written into this book
Whoever they are I feel bad for them and hope they're doing well, and that they now hate the onion boy
@@im-here-for-the-cult-stuff if what onion boy says is true then he died
@@Pizza23045 True... Well that's sad...
@@im-here-for-the-cult-stuff yeahhh
It's kai
“skin is just skin” is the most serial killer line i could imagine
"I'm not convinced American schools are this badly run."
One student at my old school tore down a poster hung up on the window outside the drama instructor's office that stated her classroom is "a safe space for LGBTQ+ youth" and threatened to bring his pastor to her office if she put it back up. She cried bc she was a relatively young teacher who didnt know how to deal with the assholery of Southern Pentecostal children who got their political ideologies from their braindead parents and then got fired for being unprofessional. A different student had a bigass confederate flag mounted to the tailgate of his truck and was never told to take it down. Recently a fight broke out at my old high school bc a visiting basketball team was comprised of mostly black students and some of our students called them the n word a bunch of times. My old school is also not IEP compliant.
Sorry you had to live in the deep south. However, please don't use the south as an example of the US. Most of the US isn't as bad as the south is (despite Republicans hard work trying to drag the rest of the country down)
Sounds like my old high school, except it was in southern NJ 😐 shits the same everywhere sadly
@@alecmullaney7957 and even then there’s a lot of good to the south, racist white people do NOT represent all of the south. Southern culture can be beautiful and was created mainly by poc, especially black people.
And also the rest of America that isn’t the south can be just as racist, homophobic, transphobic, sexist, ableist, etc. Coming from someone who’s always lived in the north and traveled in both the north and south. Being a very visibly trans gay disabled person who’s very flamboyant I kinda get treated like trash everywhere. Yeah maybe parts of the south are definitely worse, but I feel like a lot of people in the rest of the country love to just point to the south to deflect from the fact that they’re extremely bigoted and unsafe as well. It’s really the whole country. Our country isn’t built for anyone that’s not a cishet, able bodied, neurotypical white man.
@@johannsebastianbach5223 d word
@@johannsebastianbach5223 go rot in a hole, no one thinks you’re funny
"I saw some blood and a bunch of my classmates are dead,
But most importantly, there's a girl in my bed."
Poetry.
Milada Schekoldin onion boy is the best mary sue, featuring such events as the president came to my school and appreciates me and raised the schools funding and everuone clapped
Can we talk about the fact that abbigale is his daughters name? *projectile vomits*
come again nigga?
HE HAS A DAUGHTER? WHO AGREED TO BE WITH HIM?
@@xenon8927 he has 2 kids with Kai 😞
@@emperoroftheomniverse I wish I was joking.. Dude is a total creep.
@@twitch4220 Who is Kai?
I'm late to the party but I once had a teacher fail me for an entire school year by "losing" my papers and then losing literal folders of that quarters redone work.
He was quitting due to heart problems so my school counselor told me to quit complaining.
The American education system is BEYOND poorly run
"I saw some blood and my classmates are dead, but most importantly, there's a girl in my bed."
Fuck man, Dr. Seuss, you feeling okay bruh?
Of all the times I've seen this video I did NOT catch up to that rhyme.
My fucking sides are In orbit
All of his books can be summed up with that one Dr Seuss meme that’s like “one bitch, two bitch, dead bitch, new bitch-“
@@illinoisgirldreaming9085 oh I hate how this made me laugh lol
"I would not trust this woman with a god damn gerbil, never mind children's futures, and I have known her for two paragraphs." I love this sentence... so much.
Aparently this was about my teachers
I would like this comment, but I don't want to ruin the 666 likes-
My gerbils aren't going anywhere near this onion boy in a wig
@@keczuppomidorek I read gerbils as genitals and I'm traumatized
@@keczuppomidorek I thought it was genitals because it's an onision video what can I expect.
Coming from a 14 year old, this sounds like something I would expect one of my close friends to write on wattpad
@Thy Countess Haha. Fool! still on ff.net? Weak! Wait till you make it to A 0 3. It's not ready
Honestly yeah
All of my friends did that when we were in middle school
There was no need to tell us ur age but I mean :^> you're right lmao
@@leeleestone3672 nahhhh ao3 is for good fics only
I actually thought you were referencing some meme when you said, "Greg roller skates into the school shooting," but HOLY SHIT HE ACTUALLY WROTE THAT.
"american high schools can't be this bad"
my school had two bomb threats, a shooting threat, a crumbling building, numerous drug scandals with dogs being brought to the building, three hospitalizations, a teacher hit a kid and taped another's mouth shut but still being brought back, and three teachers put on leave for racism all within the span of a year and a half.
did you call in the threats? 😆
My school had 5 deaths, a bomb threat, a murder suicide and more. I fucking hate this country
I love how Greg responded to this video by insulting her appearance instead of taking advice and acknowledging her opinion. Classy.
From what I've heard of him he seems like the type of manchild whose only comeback to criticism is "Yeah? Well you're ugly."
Such a women-respecting feminist eh?
amazing grill It doesn’t really matter tho. Insulting someone’s appearance isn’t ok(unless they started it first I guess), especially as retaliation to constructive criticism. It makes you look both weak and like an asshole.
@@literallygaston2489 you're completely right and I agree, greg has no point.
@YourCommonLoser Ok I don't watch his videos so maybe I'm misinterpreting but did he actually make a freaking video rating the beauty of women on a scale of 1-10.
“and then the guidance counselor burns down their entire school”
she WHAT
That part actually sounds like a plot I would read
this book is what you get when you order Heather's on wish
The stuff that goes dark in this book is me when I try to write a thriller novel
its like a wattpad story
but even some wattpads are better than this mess
Fuckin heretic
the sentence "your bones were not shaken, gregory" has a powerful energy. I don't know what it is, but it's powerful.
this book becomes way worse when you think about his latest book and you learn that he didn't actually get together with the girl he based this book on. he wrote her a weird letter, she got mad at him, and they never spoke again.
she has no personality because greg literally didn't know anything about her. he saw one girl who brutally rejected him and decided to write a self insert fanfic in his 30s about a girl he knew of in grade school.
“The most sociopathic attempt at empathy I have ever read.” That should be on the back of the book 😂😂
Hello yes I am a person and I feel emotions and can relate to others because they, too, have feelings just like me
Some of my picks for quotes:
#deep
"clearly supposed to be _romantic,_ but I would use the word _terrifying"_
It is, right under the copyright.
Copyrighted material.
*The most sociopathic attempt at empathy I have ever read.*
Come on, Aeon, come on, do you even need to read this book, in order to know that part.
To be clear, people with ASPD are capable of empathy. There are multiple forms of empathy, if I'm correct most "sociopaths" (not even the right term) use cognitive empathy.
"Skin is just skin. It is what it is."
*jacks up the contrast to look like he's still 18*
I mean, based on how this book goes down, I'm convinced that intellectually he's about 12.
That line is basically "oh, yes, the floor here is made out of f l o o r", but with Gerg trying to throw in some r/im14andthisisdeep.
His writing makes my (thankfully never published) wattpad harry potter fan fiction I wrote when I was 12 look like amazing literature.
@Emily Barclay Cool hahaha
I call him Gerg since GREG is already the name of the fastest growing army on RUclips (or Danny Gonzalez' fanbase), also Greg is the first name from a RUclipsr I quite like, Armoured Skeptic, and best, the name Gerg just sounds like something a swamp beast who destroyed his own swamp would be named, which fits amazingly.
@Emily Barclay Exactly! The name is such a nice one, and Gerg is anything but nice, so it doesn't fit at all
That’s like the most pretentious thing I’ve ever heard. He’s like John Lennon. He says a lot of pretentious crap, thinking he’s deep and intellectually superior to everyone. The only difference is John Lennon’s pretentious crap at least sounded deep at 1st before you sat down to think about it. Onision just makes everybody face palm.
This reminded me of Diary of a Wimpy Kid (sociopathic unaware self-insert lead, cinnamon roll best friend, pretty love interest main character is obsessed with). At least in Diary of A Wimpy kid they acknowledged Greg’s shitty actions, even if there weren’t any consequences for them, and gave the side characters a personality outside of Greg.
I forgot diary of a wimpy kid was also named greg and it threw me-
Seddsss
Holy shit they're both named fucking GREG
This is the only time where "onions have layers" is a lie.
It's all just shallow, uncomfortable edgy/"deep" monologuing all the way down
Well, the onion does have layers in this case.
Problem is, the onion is rotten.
It’s onion soup in a shallow, parking lot puddle. No layers, no nuance, just the fact that if you trip on it your feet will smell like onions and you’ll eat shit because no only is this a slippery surface, it’s a slippery surface that hates you and everyone else who is not Greg-
There are layers, it just gets worse and worse and worse
You could literally end every other sentence with "and then everyone clapped"
This entire book is r/thathappened
fr
@@weethetniet9427 With a bit of r/im14andthisisdeep on the side
Reading this comment makes me want a dramatic reading by Shoe0nHead
"I sense everything I can take in around me, and then everyone clapped."
this entire video sounded like a friend telling you about a fever dream they had. absolutely love it
That’s because it *is* a narcissist’s wet dream
POV: your weird lesbian friend who you love talks about her dream for half an hour
omg ikr it sounds like one of the fever dreams i would have
Same
This makes it ten times funnier
“A sad backstory and arousing arms”
The tragic part is that you have described not only Abbi to a T, but also every other love interest in his books and about half the characters
Every scene in this book feels like it needs "and then everyone clapped" at the end.
He doesn't even format dialogue correctly. When a different character talks, you start a new paragraph.
Yes!
No matter what, you have to change the dialogue when a character speaks.
Another error, he has super cold writing. He needs to use some descriptive phrases.
Jesus.
Hey I'm subscribed to you
Dr Shaym You’re my hero. Not for any of the right reasons, but you’re my hero nonetheless.
Yo what up I had no idea possums were literary masters. Jk luv your vids
Oh hey it’s possum boy
she sacrificed her brain cells to save ours ;( you’re a hero. thank you 😔🤘🏻
F
She made a big sacrifice.
Amen
Not all heroes wear capes
F
liz kavanagh she took one for the team guys. She deserves a medal, a Damehood and everything else.
F
One thing I noticed as an older adult: No matter how batshit off the rails crazy a story from a teenage perspective is, they do have a good, hard grasp on their teachers. A lot of these people are questionable, and the kids know. It's their reality, and they have to move around in it, and just have to accept stuff that would be outrageous in the workplace.
I was the edgy loner kid with poor social skills who got bullied in school, but I never had this pathetic of a fantasy about getting the perfect girl, saving her from the abusive boyfriend, ect. Compared to Onion boy I'm a chad and I find that terrifying
Her: The grammar is wrong, the plot isn't that great, the characters are poorly written, and some of the things don't make a lot of sense
Greg: So you're literally making fun of my friend who died, apologise to me right now
🤣🤣🤣
Someguy827: She doesn't owe you shit, you waterhead asshole.
Heʼs pulling a straw man
I don’t think he’s ever had a friend
I have never seen anyone gaslight and emotionally manipulate as much as he fucking does...
Bones: shook
Shower: conversed
Notes: cryptic
Tea: S P I L L E D
Hotel? Trivago
Meme? Review.
Wig: Snatched
Arms: arousing
Speaker: incoherent
President: Here for some reason
coming back to this after the review of the onions Newest book and realizing how much Abby actually *hated* greg makes this 1000x more creepier
coming back to this after hearing you read his "autobiography" has to be the wildest trip ive taken this year. hoping the girl he based this on never finds out because how uncomfortable 😭
It's wild and I love it lol
Makes it similar to watching a series or book after knowing the great Twist and going back to seeing all the little clues
Just in this case it's not clues, but Onionboy being unimaginably pathetic
This entire book just reminds me of that quote from Spy Kids 2
”Do you think that God stays in heaven because he too fears what he has created?”
THATS FROM SPY KIDS 2??!
They managed to bust out a fucking golden quote like that for *Spy Kids* but we can’t get a semi-coherent sentence out of Onion Boy.
Holy Shi...itake mushrooms.
thats from S P Y K I D S ?
@@ollisayshi9017 It sure is 😂 I feel like the dude who said that line tho was like. Cloning dinosaurs on an island???? smth like that 😂 Can't quite remember but it was very strange. The entire Spy Kids series was... very strange.
That's actually deep
Friendly reminder that Onision described his character in the book as a "better version of himself". This creep is supposed to be better than the real Onision...
@Alex Evans Yes. If you look at the descriptions of each book in the Onion Boy trilogy, he explains how all of them were inspired by his youth; and how the protagonist in each one is a different interpretation of himself. In this one the protagonist is supposed to be him, but better, so that he can do more dramatic or important stuff. In the next book, the hero's supposed to be "the worst version of himself" even though the book still portrays him as being smarter than everyone else, and it even ends with one character saying he was the best man she ever knew. Then the Final book, where he has a teenage girlfriend when he's a child and kills God is supposed to be the truest version of himself. I wish I was making this up.
A Spoopy Scaley Scary Man
In a word: Yikes.
In two words: Big yikes.
ewwwwww
Guy of Minimal Importance hmm and I thought it might be a bit too weird writing myself into a scene of a story I’m writing as some drunk passed out alone on a bar table, and that was it for the character. But now i feel a lot better about that.
The story is fantasy grimdark comedy if anyone was wondering for context
@Average Awesome
Just having a cameo in your own book wouldn't be that weird, especially if it's just a one off thing and not a major plot point. the concept of a self insert is not fundamentally flawed. Honestly even writing a fictional memoir of sorts like this where a fictional character like you goes through similar events that you did would still be fine. The important thing about a story like this is that it has to be written without ego, acknowledging the flaws of your personality as well as your strengths, explaining how you became the person you are today. It honestly can be a good tool for self discovery by applying your own circumstances to a fictional character and seeing how you think of them from a third person perspective.
The problem with Onion Boy's books is that all of his self inserts are portrayed as perfect; characters go out of their way to acknowledge how great he is and praise him. for God's sake he wrote in a chapter where the POTUS arrives and calls him a national hero. Most importantly his protagonists never change; despite being a coming of age story "James" never grows as a person, he's perfect from start to finish. In the next book his self insert is just a cool edgy boy who's morally questionable actions are only seen as sexy and defiant of cultural norms, in his final book his main character becomes more powerful than God himself, defeating both God, The Grim reaper, God's backup self; and then reforming all of creation to his design without ever making a wrong decision.
A well written self insert gives an author a reason to reexamine themselves as a person, or simply express thier passion for something. His self inserts just serve to demand praise form the reader.
"every man in her life is clearly disgusting and abusive, except for Greg who can do no wrong..."
cut to OnionBoy pelting Shiloh with candy corn & harassment while laughing at her misery
i to would like to believe american schools aren’t this bad, but here are some tales from my two years of junior high alone:
(TW for suicide attempts, drugs, SA, and teen pregnancy)
-girl got pregnant halfway through her 8th grade year
-we went on lock down twice (once because someone said they we gonna shot their ex girlfriend, and the other time because someone said they were gonna set off a bomb at third period)
-had the fire alarm pulled at least once a week
-one kid i knew but wasn’t friends with ended up being a rapist and then he switched schools
-i once hear our dean say “g*d i hate children” (great career choice lauren!)
-girl got jumped and stabbed outside the school
-kids would just,,, walk off campus,,, in front of teachers,,, the oldest kids there were 14
-teacher would regularly yell at kids to the point they would break down crying and he only got tiered after he called a kid the n word
-my friend regularly got death threats after they were outed as trans and when he brought this up to the school with the names of people who have been threatening him they told him to just “deal with it”
-kids would bear knuckle box at the park down the street every day after school, sometimes they would also do it in the bathrooms (they all sucked at it)
-one of my friends got expelled and went to juvie for selling meth on school grounds
-i knew 6 different kids who tried to kill themselves (lucky none of them succeed)
-kids would regularly steal from the teachers
-they had to close off the private practice rooms in the music building because kids were smoking weed (honestly the tamest thing that happened in there lmao)
-some kid set a trash can on fire after they panicked and threw their juul in there after teachers went in to search the bathroom
-kid passed bout pot brownies at lunch right before we all started state testing
-dudes would stand outside the school passing out these tiny bibles to the students trying to convert them
-school nurse would often insult people when they came in for anything saying that we should be able to just deal with it. (one kid came in with a broken ankle and she gave him ice and made him go back to PE)
-one girl physically assaulted our vice principal
-teachers would make girls come up to the front of the class and bend over to check skirt lengths
-and there are a bunch of other stories about shit kids did off of campus but that a whole different (and worse!) ballgame
(also i was a student assistant in the office so i probably hear about more things then other student but holy shit, that school was hell)
I'm sorry you lived through this but I would love owning a tiny bible
how are people passing out bibles in any way comparable to the rest lol
Imagine stranger adults were handing out tiny Quran to the kids if that helps you understand
Damn, you should write nonfiction. I'd read your life.
Wow, he really is an onion!
He's bitter and unlikable, but then you start peeling back the layers and realize it's just the same thing and start crying.
Ayy don't diss onions like this, they can taste really good
He doesn’t taste very good when carmelized, though.
@@adhesiveghost2834 I mean...
Don't you dare disrespect onions like that
😂😂😂
“Every character is Greg in a wig” 😂😂👌 That sums up the whole book.
LMAO now I'm imagining the story like that 😂😂
You just made this so much less cringy.
Honestly it sums up all of Greg’s books
Him and all his personality
I wrote a book called Outcasts when I was 13 and self published it on Amazon and Kindle when I was 17 and it’s still better than all of Onision’s books combined... this may say something about his intellect...
Link!
this is an inspirational video to me, as someone with adhd and dyslexia, the thought of writing a story always seemed impossible. but hey, it couldn't be worse than this, so there's that.
Okay, but imagine if the whole “everyone is just Greg in a different wig” concept was intentional. With just the slightest bit of editing, this could have been made into a story about an unreliable narrator, rather than just being Onision’s power trip.
If the author wasn't Greg and the whole "I'm better than everyone and all of the characters worship the streets I walk on" thing was intentional, this could be an actual good book.
@Miasma that would be a great dark comedy if you ask me. Just a delusional man who thinks everyone worships the ground he walks on when really he’s stalking all his friends and this girl Abby
@@mmmbepis8643 is that not just the Netflix series You
"Greg" and "Unreliable Narrator" just makes me think of the Diary of the wimpy kid books.
And I like it that way.
I agree. But the narrator (Greg) isn’t emphasized to be insane or unreliable enough in the book to warrant this. It would require a heavy bit of editing in order to cement that theory.
the entire book is the tumblr "and then everyone clapped" thing
That's what I was thinking of!! 😂😂
And dont forget when obama was there
or could be /r/thathappened
Exactly 😂
Then Albert Einstein gave him a $100% bill
My brain immediately translated "Your bones are not shaking, Gregory" into the Rockstar Freddy voice
"I am not convinced that American public high schools are this badly run" HA the stories I could tell. My middle school principal screamed at a bunch of 6th graders for not knowing what to do in a fire drill (this was because no one told them what to do), I got yelled for the majority of my lunch period when I was in 8th grade by a supervisor because someone tried to steal my yearbook (you'd think there would be more to that story but not really), and I've had more than one teacher on separate occasions publicly announce to the class that they hate kids, teaching, and us (idk why they became a teacher. And there are many, many, more stores... So yeah.
When you said "we're only halfway through this book" I nearly choked on my fries because there have already been 12 PLOT LINES ALREADY THIS IS WORSE THAN RIVERDALE
At least the first season of Riverdale was competently written (somewhat).
Maybe all the characters are on jingle jangle
😂😂😂
*"YOUR BONES WERE NOT SHAKEN, GREGORY"*
This book sounds like an unintentional case study in all the things experienced writers tell new writers NOT to do under any circumstances.
This book is more self-inserty then those actual self insert books on wattpad.
the fact that Greg ended up legally changing his name to James just makes this a whole lot funnier
It really does, too funny.
Wait what
w a i t
fucking pardon?????
*Hol up*
It kinda sounds like when a 6th grader uses a bunch of big words in an essay to feel special
Sounds like? The near 30 year old still has the mental and emotional level of an angsty 6th grade.
I_Am_Dragoon lol yeah
Lol been there done that
Or to boost that essay level. I know I did that.
b o n e - s h a k i n g
8:32 “I’m gonna walk into the goddamn ocean! We only have a lake? F u c k -” ~ Teya
"Your bones were not shaken, Gregory!" I love that. Also I commented this on another video I think, but like... they never explain how in the actual fuck the shooter recovered from being *punched in the throat by an adult* Like... that would lay out a full on adult into a paroxysm of coughing and trying to recover, but apparently Teen Shooter™ just went "ok boomer" and shot mcteacher, somehow.