Thank you, This video was very helpful. Lost my mom March 2020. The biggest challenge for me was her not eating nor drinking. That was agonizing for me that she wasn’t ‘consuming’ anything and I insisted that an IV be used for her to receive some fluids at least. Now I understand that it was just part of the inevitable process. I saw another video where an nurse explained that “The patient isn’t dying because they’re NOT eating, they’re not eating BECAUSE they are dying.” Those words gave me new understanding. Miss you mom 💔
That’s the way it was with my mom , I felt so bad , in the hospital they told me to feed her but she wouldn’t swallow the yogurt , she clenched her teeth , I wish I knew this then 😞
My great grandmother died yesterday and this video make me understand what happened to her a lot better. The death rattle was very disturbing to hear but we had the luck to be there and hold her hand when she passed. Thank you so much for talking about this and it helps me a lot❤️
My family was with grandma as she slipped away. We were chatting. But I was carefully watching her breathing. It continuously slowed down. I watched as she took her last breath and fell away. It was peaceful. We miss her.
Essential information for those caring for a patient at home . I noticed the change in skin temperature a couple days before my dad passed and I suspected that the end was near . Much gratitude for sharing .
Thank you for these videos. I can’t tell you how much peace of mind this provides. I wish more people knew about these things so that we can make the right decisions for ourselves and our loved ones.
I'm greatful for this video, my grandma has had enough of life at her brilliant age of 91, broken her pelvis just before Xmas and has been in hospital for 3 weeks refusing food, drink and medicine so it's not long now.
Thank you for watching my video. If you liked it, please consider giving it a thumbs up 👍. Feel free to let me know if you have any questions, I'd be happy to help you ☺.
I heard the term agonal breathing in first aid CPR, in the case of an accident, we were told to start CRP to save the casualty. But in the case of terminal sickness where patients have already been in bed for a long time or unconscious, what do we do when agonal breathing happens? Still CRP?
It REALLY SEEMS to ME that the BIG Question for You DOC for ALL of us is......... WHAT IS THE BEST most painless way to die IF were in a Hospital? I put a Natural death and a good friend said that was terriable way to die. SOoooo what do YOU Sugest if were looking at it. it seems like these days the docs hands are tied by the GOV even in a hospital setting. For now a hospital is the LAST PLACE I wanna die
Dr , is there a normal sequence of the conditions you mentioned … first skin temperature change , then loss of appetite followed by the rattling and then incontinence ? Or can this order vary ? Thanks
@@tigalbaby There is no clear sequence. The order can vary. Based on my own experience, I would say that loss of appetite often happens first and that incontinence, death rattle, and temperature changes happen more toward the end of someone's life.
My mother died on November 15, 2022. It was totally unexpected. The night before she could not move from the bedside commode back to bed so I had to come in and help my sister. The next day my mom was perfectly fine!! That night it happened again and I came back to help her put her back in bed. Then the worst happened. She started initially dying. We had no clue what happened or how it started. The day before she was fine! She was talking and doing things eating and talking on the phone!!!! Then Thursday......we had to call hospice nurse to come in. They said she might have had a TIA. She had blood clots in both legs and she was on eliquis. Several months prior she fell in the bathroom and my sister and I both asked her if she hit her head and she said no. To this day I wish I had taken her to the hospital to make sure all was ok in the brain. I do blame myself for alot but the nurse and everyone else said both my sister and myself were the best two people they had seen to take care of their love one as much as we did. We were able to give her some water basically droplets so that she could swallow. She later was given morphine - like the next day to keep her comfortable. My sister and I both would rotate her so that she would not get sores and we got glycerine lemon swabs to keep her mouth and lips moist. By Sunday the nurse said she is actively dieing. Monday we could see the moddeling occur and Tuesday the nurse said it would be anytime. She stayed an extra hour I believe she thought she would pass within that time. But she left at 5 and my mother passed at 618 pm. My sister and I were both on each side of her bed holding her hand and telling her it's ok to go and to be with our father. For the past couple of days I would play my mom's and my dad's favorite music and she would react by her eyebrows moving. She always said she would want to die in her sleep and at peace and at home........her wish came true. Both parents are cremated and they want to be scattered back out west where they are originally from. In my mind I know I have to do that but in my heart......it will be hard. But I did buy some necklaces for all my siblings and I mixed some ashes of both my mom and my dad in them so they will always be with us. I know this is more than what you wanted to read but.....just felt I needed to share. And thank you for explaining more in detail about the mucus coming up from the back of the throat. We would get some swabs to swab it out of her throat for the fear of her choking.
Thank you so much for sharing this, travelingmuffin. It must have been a horrible few days/weeks/months for you. I really don't know what to say. I hope this story can help other people. My condolences 💛
Sorry for your loss. It’s tough, my dad passed the same day as your mom. He stopped eating much the week before. Then on Saturday night suddenly couldn’t get up to go to the restroom. My mom was taking care of him, he had Parkinson’s and dementia. She had the ambulance take him to the hospital, called me and we went to the hospital. He wasn’t speaking, but was still trying to get up to go to the restroom. He made it for 2 nights in the ICU before he passed at 1:28 am November 15, 2022.
I was critically ill with sepsis twice in 2021. Have to say, I did exhibit some of these symptoms. Very close shave; I also had severe anaemia and was diagnosed with bowel cancer, surgery required but radio or chemo therapy ruled out. It was 8 months until I got home again, weak as a kitten. I'm still recovering, although I have to guard against going back downhill.
Glad I had discovered this video and thank you for it..Looking back at my late dad who passed away 3 years ago, we have noticed all the 5 signs and only now I knew that artifical nutrition drips are not good for a dying person...4 days before the passing of my dad, he had never woke up and only had been closing his eyes yet we all were still hoping for my dad somehow will wake up again...Now with this info, I will be able to tell whether someone is able to make it out alive or not and be more able to prepare oneself for the final moment and farewell ...
I'm so glad this video was somewhat helpful to you. It is indeed something we don't talk about, something we don't know a lot about, but in my opinion, it can give closure to people and it can help family members deal with/accept the symptoms.
thank you - so many are misinformed about the death process and think they are doing a good thing by trying to force food/water on their loved one who is dying. if they don't want food then we have to accept that. eating will only make them uncomfortable and I'd rather my loved one be comfortable in their last moments then trying to make myself feel better about what's happening.
My mother is experiencing these symptoms, especially 3 and 4. This video is helping me to understand the what and why. Thank you for posting, its helping me.
I just saw your video- when my dad was dying I wanted to know up front what to expect. The nurse was very understand and nice about it. One thing that shocked me was that the blood from the feet would start to look like bruising.
Thank you for presenting this fact of life in the most desirous way. I have experienced being among the dead by being a helper at two funeral homes when I was a teenager. In my early 20s, I have seen autopsies performed at a morgue. In 1993, I had an unusual experience of being with a close neighbor who was dying in her apartment. Now I remember what this part of life is all about.
Thank you so much. I am just finding this series tonight and am watching them. My Mom is in end stage lung cancer (Radon exposure), and we are praying she can get through Christmas with ability to travel here and interact (all her family is flying in), but it has spread everywhere and stopped responding to treatment. After Christmas, I know I will need to know what to expect and how to help her and my Dad, her love of 57 years.
So Many hugs... My aunt is in end stage lung cancer...... It was a surprise to us all. Just got home from the hospital seeing her. It's so hard... I'm not sure she has much longer. She was diagnosed Dec 8 2022 and so I've been trying to find what to expect too... Thinking of everyone going through such difficult times...
I truly appreciate your thoughtful and caring video and how you articulated everything clearly. I also realize that my mother wasn’t suffering, her physical vessel was simply transitioning to life after life. Her soul is free.
You're very welcome. I'm so sorry for your loss, Yogachick. 😪💫
4 месяца назад
Thanks for this video. My wife died in 2021 from lung cancer and i had the chance to stay with her till the end. this were the hardest hours of my life.
Thank you for this clear and informative video. I wish we were more educated about the process of dying and death in general. Many people don't even want to hear the word. We, and everyone we know are all going to make this journey, so why not prepare a little now?
I've seen a few passing of love ones just accepting my own passing it's very hard I guess just like to thank you for a little better understanding of passing
Thank you for explaining how the body shuts down. Had I known the signs, I would have spent that last night at the hospital with my father. As it was, I left in the evening fully expecting to see him the next day. It wasn't to be. It is a source of constant regret. And anger. It should be hospital policy everywhere for the doctor or head nurse to explain to family what to expect when the time comes. My father was a devout Catholic and had I known that it wasn't "just" a broken pelvis but much worse, I would have arranged for a priest to administer the Last Rites. I failed him at this crucial moment and I can never forgive myself for that.
@@dr.paulinemoyaert - Thank you Doctor. I'm sorry for going off on a rant! The staff probably thought that I knew but I didn't... The information that you provided, so clearly and simply, should be conveyed to all families of elderly patients, whatever their condition, when hospitalized. The general public should not be expected to understand the meaning of every decision taken in the hospital room especially when staff are uncommunicative or seemingly reluctant to share information. Thank you very much for the time you spend online sharing your knowledge with us. 💕
@@solamano7239 you're very welcome. Thank you for your kind words. I totally agree that more people should know about this, I believe that information like this can greatly relieve suffering for family members.💛
I was with both parents and two aunties when they died. In all four cases, their facial skin tightened and a distinct colour change, a jaundice like shade, occurred minutes before their last breaths. All were peaceful. I was expecting this would be included in your list. My father was a cardiac physician and his sister an anaesthetist. Both died of cancer and both at home under our care. (Doctors don't like to be patients!)
I worked as an R.N in several nursing homes. I noticed on a number of my patients who were near the end that their nose would change shape. The nose would become narrower and a little pointed.
But as a person is dying, they sleep more, eat less and talk less. But my wife became very hot at times, rather than feeling cold. This also is quite normal. But they can hear right to the end of life. She had MS for 26 years and was not able to ambulate for the last 15 years. I was her carer. We were married 51 years. She has since passed and is no longer suffering.
My 31 yr old brother died a couple weeks ago of pulmonary fibrosis due to him having cystic fibrosis. I videoed everything and this is exact. He lost controls of his bowels a day before he passed.
I have ALL of these symptoms and the VA won't help! I just can't tell you enough how much and way worse I have. I can't even tell you. I am a purple heart vet and haven't been able to get sigficant help. I'm 33. I'm sorry for your brother. I have been.... I just deleted a shit storm of symptoms.... but my wife doesn't doesn't believe me.
@@jameshayden6891 I'm so sorry to hear this. 😟 I really hope someone can help you, it seems like you really need to go to a doctor who listens to your symptoms.
I lost a close friend recently through terminal bone cancer 7th November, she had breast cancer years ago. She was like a mom I never had, and I a daughter she never had, as her own is toxic and poisonous. I stayed by her side with her son, "my partner" holding her hand from 12pm until 9pm.... she passed away in hospital at 7:05am...."the time my partner's alarm went off" so wondering if this was a sign to let us know ? I only knew this lovely lady for several years, she had great skin and looked so young at 81, had a beautiful kind soul. The last stage, days before.... we were comforting, talking to her.... she had little sips of tea "which she had been missing due to not being able to keep anything down for days" Bless her, gently wiping her mouth and massaging some nivea around her lips to prevent them drying up. I rubbed her feet, which she loved. I am psychic and picked up signs after she passed over. The month has a connection to me and my partner, and the dates and time ..... we were the only ones there for her those 7 years..
Just this morning my brother received a call from our mother's hospice nurse that she is not expected to make it through the weekend. I've never heard of skin mottling before, but saw it today. Thankful that we were all able to be with her. We told her it was okay to let go and prayed to God that she have a peaceful journey. Goodbye momma.
@@dr.paulinemoyaert unfortunately she broke her femur and after her surgery she didn't look the same so I knew her time was coming and took care of her until her last night of breath.
I am gonna be honest, my mom died 2 years ago, it's hard to talk about it, but she came across all 5 signs. Cannot reverse the time, but brothers, be aware of your parents health situation. Trust me! Enjoy your parents!
Thank you for this wonderful video. I wish people would realize that death is like birth they both result in entering new worlds. People often torture their loved ones trying to keep a dying person alive. Yes, we don't want to lose our loved ones but having their body suffer in a bed is not living.
My Nan's last words to me were 'I'm thirsty' and I wanted to get her some water but was told she isn't allowed water. I believe NHS policy was to deny water in order to speed up death. I now feel it is evil to deny water to someone who is awake and asking for water but I was only 15 years old at the time and thought the nurse knew best. This is just one of the reasons I no longer fully trust medical professionals.
Since may 20212, starting with my younger brother than my mom in October , my father in law three weeks ago and just a few days ago my friend passes away make me realise how dead come without warning no matter what is your age and your health condition and everyone will experience it, make me realise to do something good that my friends will remember me for 😢
My mom stopped eating a couple days before she died and there was swelling in the hands and feet before that. I think there was coldness too. And she had the Chenne (sp?) Stokes breathing the day of her death. That’s a rapid hyperventilating followed by slower breaths. Surprised it wasn’t mentioned in the video. Even before that the breathing would slow at times.
My grandad had all the symptoms. He stopped eating and drinking for weeks. He lay in bed and barely moved. We knew he was dying. And stay with him until his death.
My Nan died 10 year ago and went through the not eating or drinking stage and the sleeping more stage. My mum tried pushing her to eat which just led to arguments definitely not worth it as it just prolongs a life not worth living if anything. She had 4 pairs of carers each day and would alternate between going to bed and getting up so she would be in bed at night and In middle of day. She was unable to do anything so just stayed in whatever position carers put her in. This went on 5 month.
my father died due to kidney failure and sepsis... he was in ventilator and slept most of the time in his last days i couldnt be there during his last moments the nurses did not even inform us during his end moments .... it was so cruel of them ... he was only 58
I am watching, because I am suffering from mottled skin on and off. It is not related to cold. The case is how I understood, in those times my body is hard at maintaining life and every bit of energy need to be saved to keep me alive. Now, to find a doctor who takes me serious about this is very difficult.
@@dr.paulinemoyaert I m learning how to understand my in-law last stage of prostate cancer spread to lung ... Heart breaking...🧠🧠🧠😢😢life...,. Live for this moment.... Thank you again 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏
When my grandmother was dying, she came out of a coma and asked where she was? I told her and she said she didn't want to be there because she had been in Africa and Asia and everywhere. I call death GOING TO DANCE ON THE WIND because they slip away and go DANCE ON THE WIND.
Its really hard to loss our love ones specially when you are not there at the very moment when they are experiencing the dying stages which I regret in my lifw for my parents.
Not necessarily. My dad died at 77 after 10 years of irreversible decline with emphysema. That was 31 years ago.Toward the end, he developed heart failure and his feet swelled up, a telltale sign. They gave him morphine to relax whatever was left of the lungs so he could have better function. But in the end, the effect of the morphine stopped his weakened heart. He was under hospice care and had been hospitalized briefly (for the last time). The family had visited him on the last day, expecting him to be discharged to back home the next day. The nurse discovered after midnight that he had died in his sleep. He had been completely lucid and did not go through any struggle or agony at the end, but he had accepted for several months that he probably didn't have long to live. He didn't have the experience described in this video. Ask for the morphine if you are afraid when the time approaches.
I first noticed the mottled skin the day my aunt fell on the stairs to my folks’ home. We had just got home from errands. Over the next 4-6 weeks she had a steady decline and died Nov 4, 2022 from GBM.
But it doesn't makes sense when it happens.. Still doesn't make sense for me 2 years later. There's always news about accidents or cancer. But never this. So it seemed surreal to see this in person. And even sadder to know it will happen to me one day. It doesn't make sense how the body simply decides to shut down when it's time. It's really confusing the consciousness given to us, the spatial and accrued learning awareness given to us. Either people are just incredibly mentally strong to ignore signals and pains in their body, or have zero pains, are ignorant to health sensory signals, or are incredibly aware to put in health and fitness work against decay and death. Sadly I have been trained and influenced since I was about 8 to listen to my body, to diversify foods as much as possible, to understand symptoms and pains and visual cues the body releases, and it's been great. But it's a nightmare too having this awareness and seeing someone die over time, and to understand that I must expect this to happen to me one day or worse painful cancer. Hmmh 😔. That's why relationships don't make sense to me, contractual agreements, overall morals and mannerisms, family blood line love preference, love, liking and preferences, fighting, social circles, and more... Sorry but none of this makes any sense to me. Anyways, nice video and may the ridiculous human life continue on.
To anyone who had just lost a loved one recently, let me tell you what will happen... I had lost a very dear relative 14 years ago and here is how the coming years happened for me. You never go a day without thinking about that person. In the 14 years, 5,040 days, I had always thought about that relative once per day. It may be when you are alone, deep in thought, but you always think of them once everyday. Its guaranteed. Second, even after 14 years it seems as fresh a memory as if it happened yesterday. The disbelief never ever leaves but the anger, bargaining, does. This is the most imporant thing, if you lose a loved one, dont expect your life to be as happy as it was when they were around. Life after death of a close family or friend is guaranteed to be duller, less colorful, and less warm than it was then they were alive
To je istina , sve sto ste rekli, izgubila sam majku prije pola godine, svaki dan pomislim na nju, ali bas svaki dan i zao mi je sto nisam vise vremena provela s njom. Umrla je u domu za stare kad sam joj dosla u posetu jednog vikenda. Cekala me je da dodjem, i onda je otisla, ali ne znam da li je bila svesna da sam pored nje. Kad sam je dozivala ucinili mi se u jednom momentu kao da me je cula, ne znam , mozda je to bila samo moja zelja da me ona cuje, uglavnom, sacekala me je majcica
With my cancer I am at the point I really do not eat but maybe one thing a day. I find my bottled water last longer. At times I feel I cannot get my bresth but only for a short time. Yes I find I either fall to sleep or it feels like I just passed out. It seems like my pain meds do not last, now every four hours. Cancer seems like a slow death ehen sll you can do is sit or lay most of tge day.
I was very close to my papa from a young age. That’s why I’m glad he died peacefully in his sleep. Bad thing is that he was driving at the time and the passengers didn’t make it because he hit a tree. 😢
I witnessed death rattle almost 6 months before my Moms death at the time medication and oxygen helped her health also improved for 6 months but the weakness caused due to slower heart due to low blood flow to hands and legs couldn't be much recouped and her appetite also could be recovered after 6 months of struggle she died.
I am a nurse, LVN in CA. one of the strangest things I have ever experienced has happened twice to me. While working in an SNF I have had two times where a patient has died and then right before the end of the shift a second patient dies. It is the demanded thing I have ever seen.
My dad was himself a doctor and had told us 4 months back that his death is approaching.we tried our level best with medications but could not save him.he died in jan 2023.
Will people experience all 5 when dying? My Nan is in the dying phase right now and we thought last night would be her last with the cheyne stroke breathing but today she went back to drinking lots of fluids (2 complan, 2 fortisip, 1000ml of water and 2 cups of tea..) is this common?
No, people won't experience all 5 signs. It is possible, especially at the end, but not a necessity. You have to see the dying phase as a horizontal line that goes up and down. One day, it will be a very bad one and you'll think that the end is very near. And the other day, she seems miraculously better. This can all be part of the dying phase. It's not an exact science, every person will display different symptoms. Take care! (Short answer to your question: Yes, this is common and totally normal)
The evening before my 94 year old mother died she ate a full order of shrimp with snow peas from a Chinese restaurant and then she literally started grabbing some of the beef with eggplant that I was eating, as if to say I don't care what you want I need lots of food! It's important to understand that my mother was 88 pounds and just barely 5 feet tall!
An updated version of this video can be found here: ruclips.net/video/qEt4cu6jIsI/видео.html 💛
Thank you, This video was very helpful. Lost my mom March 2020. The biggest challenge for me was her not eating nor drinking. That was agonizing for me that she wasn’t ‘consuming’ anything and I insisted that an IV be used for her to receive some fluids at least. Now I understand that it was just part of the inevitable process. I saw another video where an nurse explained that “The patient isn’t dying because they’re NOT eating, they’re not eating BECAUSE they are dying.” Those words gave me new understanding. Miss you mom 💔
I can totally relate to that, the not eating/drinking part is often the hardest. I'm so sorry for your loss.
That’s the way it was with my mom , I felt so bad , in the hospital they told me to feed her but she wouldn’t swallow the yogurt , she clenched her teeth , I wish I knew this then 😞
My husband passed in March 2020 also. The not eating was so difficult for me to comprehend, but then after I, as you, understood. He was dying.
My condolences
@@badaboehm- Thank you
My great grandmother died yesterday and this video make me understand what happened to her a lot better. The death rattle was very disturbing to hear but we had the luck to be there and hold her hand when she passed. Thank you so much for talking about this and it helps me a lot❤️
I'm deeply sorry for the lost of your great grandmother. I'm glad that this video helped you understand what happened. 💫💛
Hope you are doing ok x
I hope you are doing ok x
Sorry for your loss bless your great grandmother and her family that loves her,
in Jesus name we pray
Amen
My family was with grandma as she slipped away. We were chatting. But I was carefully watching her breathing. It continuously slowed down. I watched as she took her last breath and fell away. It was peaceful. We miss her.
Thanks for sharing, Joseph! 💛💫😢
Essential information for those caring for a patient at home . I noticed the change in skin temperature a couple days before my dad passed and I suspected that the end was near . Much gratitude for sharing .
Thank you, Fredzorro. 💛
Thank you for these videos. I can’t tell you how much peace of mind this provides. I wish more people knew about these things so that we can make the right decisions for ourselves and our loved ones.
I totally agree with you, Andrea. This is one of the major reasons why I've made this video. 💛💫
I'm greatful for this video, my grandma has had enough of life at her brilliant age of 91, broken her pelvis just before Xmas and has been in hospital for 3 weeks refusing food, drink and medicine so it's not long now.
I'm so sorry to hear this, Angel. Take care 💛😥
Thank you for watching my video. If you liked it, please consider giving it a thumbs up 👍. Feel free to let me know if you have any questions, I'd be happy to help you ☺.
I heard the term agonal breathing in first aid CPR, in the case of an accident, we were told to start CRP to save the casualty. But in the case of terminal sickness where patients have already been in bed for a long time or unconscious, what do we do when agonal breathing happens? Still CRP?
It REALLY SEEMS to ME that the BIG Question for You DOC for ALL of us is......... WHAT IS THE BEST most painless way to die IF were in a Hospital? I put a Natural death and a good friend said that was terriable way to die. SOoooo what do YOU Sugest if were looking at it. it seems like these days the docs hands are tied by the GOV even in a hospital setting. For now a hospital is the LAST PLACE I wanna die
Dr , is there a normal sequence of the conditions you mentioned … first skin temperature change , then loss of appetite followed by the rattling and then incontinence ? Or can this order vary ? Thanks
@@tigalbaby There is no clear sequence. The order can vary. Based on my own experience, I would say that loss of appetite often happens first and that incontinence, death rattle, and temperature changes happen more toward the end of someone's life.
@@dr.paulinemoyaert clarification much appreciated .
My mother died on November 15, 2022. It was totally unexpected. The night before she could not move from the bedside commode back to bed so I had to come in and help my sister. The next day my mom was perfectly fine!! That night it happened again and I came back to help her put her back in bed. Then the worst happened. She started initially dying. We had no clue what happened or how it started. The day before she was fine! She was talking and doing things eating and talking on the phone!!!! Then Thursday......we had to call hospice nurse to come in. They said she might have had a TIA. She had blood clots in both legs and she was on eliquis. Several months prior she fell in the bathroom and my sister and I both asked her if she hit her head and she said no. To this day I wish I had taken her to the hospital to make sure all was ok in the brain. I do blame myself for alot but the nurse and everyone else said both my sister and myself were the best two people they had seen to take care of their love one as much as we did. We were able to give her some water basically droplets so that she could swallow. She later was given morphine - like the next day to keep her comfortable. My sister and I both would rotate her so that she would not get sores and we got glycerine lemon swabs to keep her mouth and lips moist. By Sunday the nurse said she is actively dieing. Monday we could see the moddeling occur and Tuesday the nurse said it would be anytime. She stayed an extra hour I believe she thought she would pass within that time. But she left at 5 and my mother passed at 618 pm. My sister and I were both on each side of her bed holding her hand and telling her it's ok to go and to be with our father. For the past couple of days I would play my mom's and my dad's favorite music and she would react by her eyebrows moving. She always said she would want to die in her sleep and at peace and at home........her wish came true. Both parents are cremated and they want to be scattered back out west where they are originally from. In my mind I know I have to do that but in my heart......it will be hard. But I did buy some necklaces for all my siblings and I mixed some ashes of both my mom and my dad in them so they will always be with us.
I know this is more than what you wanted to read but.....just felt I needed to share. And thank you for explaining more in detail about the mucus coming up from the back of the throat. We would get some swabs to swab it out of her throat for the fear of her choking.
Thank you so much for sharing this, travelingmuffin. It must have been a horrible few days/weeks/months for you. I really don't know what to say. I hope this story can help other people. My condolences 💛
Sorry for your loss. It’s tough, my dad passed the same day as your mom. He stopped eating much the week before. Then on Saturday night suddenly couldn’t get up to go to the restroom. My mom was taking care of him, he had Parkinson’s and dementia. She had the ambulance take him to the hospital, called me and we went to the hospital. He wasn’t speaking, but was still trying to get up to go to the restroom. He made it for 2 nights in the ICU before he passed at 1:28 am November 15, 2022.
I was critically ill with sepsis twice in 2021. Have to say, I did exhibit some of these symptoms. Very close shave; I also had severe anaemia and was diagnosed with bowel cancer, surgery required but radio or chemo therapy ruled out. It was 8 months until I got home again, weak as a kitten. I'm still recovering, although I have to guard against going back downhill.
What a story. 😳😥 Wishing you a speedy recovery, Bing bong. Take care. 💪
Try theraphi therapy if u can
I am sorry for what you went through! I hope you will do well with your recovery! Take care!!!
All the best, you can do it
❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
Glad I had discovered this video and thank you for it..Looking back at my late dad who passed away 3 years ago, we have noticed all the 5 signs and only now I knew that artifical nutrition drips are not good for a dying person...4 days before the passing of my dad, he had never woke up and only had been closing his eyes yet we all were still hoping for my dad somehow will wake up again...Now with this info, I will be able to tell whether someone is able to make it out alive or not and be more able to prepare oneself for the final moment and farewell ...
I'm so glad this video was somewhat helpful to you. It is indeed something we don't talk about, something we don't know a lot about, but in my opinion, it can give closure to people and it can help family members deal with/accept the symptoms.
thank you - so many are misinformed about the death process and think they are doing a good thing by trying to force food/water on their loved one who is dying. if they don't want food then we have to accept that. eating will only make them uncomfortable and I'd rather my loved one be comfortable in their last moments then trying to make myself feel better about what's happening.
💛💛
Thank you for a very educational video. My wife is in this stage right now and it was very comforting to hear the facts and that it is normal.
Hi Daggebagge, thank you for your comment. I'm so sorry to hear this about your wife 😪🧡. Take care!
Did she die?
@@ahogesupremacy 😑😒
@@leataylor9277 what?
@@leataylor9277 sthu
My mother is experiencing these symptoms, especially 3 and 4. This video is helping me to understand the what and why. Thank you for posting, its helping me.
I'm so sorry to hear this. Take care! 🧡
I just saw your video- when my dad was dying I wanted to know up front what to expect. The nurse was very understand and nice about it. One thing that shocked me was that the blood from the feet would start to look like bruising.
I can imagine, I would be shocked too. I'm sorry for your loss. 😪💫
Thank you for presenting this fact of life in the most desirous way. I have experienced being among the dead by being a helper at two funeral homes when I was a teenager. In my early 20s, I have seen autopsies performed at a morgue. In 1993, I had an unusual experience of being with a close neighbor who was dying in her apartment. Now I remember what this part of life is all about.
Thanks for sharing this, Captain Keyboard 💛💛
@@dr.paulinemoyaert You are welcome. Thank you for your thoughtfulness to go above and beyond just to tap or type to me.🤎💜
@@captainkeyboard1007 😘💛
Thank you so much. I am just finding this series tonight and am watching them. My Mom is in end stage lung cancer (Radon exposure), and we are praying she can get through Christmas with ability to travel here and interact (all her family is flying in), but it has spread everywhere and stopped responding to treatment. After Christmas, I know I will need to know what to expect and how to help her and my Dad, her love of 57 years.
Hi Jody, thank you for sharing your story. I'm so sorry to hear this. I really hope that your mom can get through Christmas 😟🤞🤞
I hope everything works out. My grandma is end stage cancer. They expect only a couple days
@@Tatorhead1234 I'm so sorry to hear this. Take care. 😔😥
So Many hugs... My aunt is in end stage lung cancer...... It was a surprise to us all. Just got home from the hospital seeing her. It's so hard... I'm not sure she has much longer. She was diagnosed Dec 8 2022 and so I've been trying to find what to expect too... Thinking of everyone going through such difficult times...
My mom is at end of life too Its all so scary for me and i keep reminding her she isnt alone even if she cant talk or see us anymore
I truly appreciate your thoughtful and caring video and how you articulated everything clearly. I also realize that my mother wasn’t suffering, her physical vessel was simply transitioning to life after life. Her soul is free.
Thank you, MsShura
Thank you so much for this video. My mom died a few months ago and I’m still trying to process it and this video helped. Thank you
You're very welcome. I'm so sorry for your loss, Yogachick. 😪💫
Thanks for this video. My wife died in 2021 from lung cancer and i had the chance to stay with her till the end. this were the hardest hours of my life.
Thank you for these videos. They are so well done and have very much put me at ease during this process ❤
You are so welcome, GardenMgr. Glad to hear they were helpful. 💛💫
I will surely watch out for these signs. Thanks for the advance notice.
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Thank you for this clear and informative video. I wish we were more educated about the process of dying and death in general. Many people don't even want to hear the word. We, and everyone we know are all going to make this journey, so why not prepare a little now?
Thank you, J F! 💛
I've seen a few passing of love ones just accepting my own passing it's very hard I guess just like to thank you for a little better understanding of passing
Thank you, Peter! 💛
you won`t be alone Peter. Loved ones or someone who knows you will help you. Blessing to you.
Thank you for explaining how the body shuts down. Had I known the signs, I would have spent that last night at the hospital with my father. As it was, I left in the evening fully expecting to see him the next day. It wasn't to be. It is a source of constant regret. And anger. It should be hospital policy everywhere for the doctor or head nurse to explain to family what to expect when the time comes. My father was a devout Catholic and had I known that it wasn't "just" a broken pelvis but much worse, I would have arranged for a priest to administer the Last Rites. I failed him at this crucial moment and I can never forgive myself for that.
I'm so sorry to hear this, Sola Mano 😥😪
@@dr.paulinemoyaert - Thank you Doctor. I'm sorry for going off on a rant! The staff probably thought that I knew but I didn't... The information that you provided, so clearly and simply, should be conveyed to all families of elderly patients, whatever their condition, when hospitalized. The general public should not be expected to understand the meaning of every decision taken in the hospital room especially when staff are uncommunicative or seemingly reluctant to share information.
Thank you very much for the time you spend online sharing your knowledge with us. 💕
@@solamano7239 you're very welcome. Thank you for your kind words. I totally agree that more people should know about this, I believe that information like this can greatly relieve suffering for family members.💛
@@dr.paulinemoyaert - 💯
Oh no😢 still offer Masses for him...
Just lost my Mom in Feb... Thank you for sharing this video.
I'm so sorry for your loss, Nicole 💛😢
THANK YOU FOR THIS SIMPLE EXPLANATION.
You're welcome! 😊
I was with both parents and two aunties when they died. In all four cases, their facial skin tightened and a distinct colour change, a jaundice like shade, occurred minutes before their last breaths. All were peaceful. I was expecting this would be included in your list. My father was a cardiac physician and his sister an anaesthetist. Both died of cancer and both at home under our care. (Doctors don't like to be patients!)
Thank you for sharing your story and I'm so sorry to hear this, Marion. My condolences.
@@dr.paulinemoyaert Thank you Dr Moyaert.
They may not have included it because it’s more typical for pt’s skin to demonstrate signs of diminished circulation; e.g., mottled skin or cyanosis
I've been through this with patients and I cry and cry everytime I should cry for their release but I cry for the loss
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This gave me so much comfort. My grandma died two days ago and I miss her so much.
I worked as an R.N in several nursing homes. I noticed on a number of my patients who were near the end that their nose would change shape. The nose would become narrower and a little pointed.
Never seen that, but thanks for sharing! 💛💛
But as a person is dying, they sleep more, eat less and talk less. But my wife became very hot at times, rather than feeling cold. This also is quite normal. But they can hear right to the end of life. She had MS for 26 years and was not able to ambulate for the last 15 years. I was her carer. We were married 51 years. She has since passed and is no longer suffering.
I'm so sorry to hear this, Ron. My condolences 💫😪
🙏❤️
My 31 yr old brother died a couple weeks ago of pulmonary fibrosis due to him having cystic fibrosis. I videoed everything and this is exact. He lost controls of his bowels a day before he passed.
Thank you for your comment. I'm so sorry to hear that your brother has passed. My condolences to you and your family. 💫💛
❤
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I have ALL of these symptoms and the VA won't help! I just can't tell you enough how much and way worse I have. I can't even tell you. I am a purple heart vet and haven't been able to get sigficant help. I'm 33. I'm sorry for your brother. I have been.... I just deleted a shit storm of symptoms.... but my wife doesn't doesn't believe me.
@@jameshayden6891 I'm so sorry to hear this. 😟
I really hope someone can help you, it seems like you really need to go to a doctor who listens to your symptoms.
Thank you for the video. It was very informative and you’re right we need to understand.
Thank you, Jonah 😊
I lost a close friend recently through terminal bone cancer 7th November, she had breast cancer years ago. She was like a mom I never had, and I a daughter she never had, as her own is toxic and poisonous. I stayed by her side with her son, "my partner" holding her hand from 12pm until 9pm.... she passed away in hospital at 7:05am...."the time my partner's alarm went off" so wondering if this was a sign to let us know ? I only knew this lovely lady for several years, she had great skin and looked so young at 81, had a beautiful kind soul. The last stage, days before.... we were comforting, talking to her.... she had little sips of tea "which she had been missing due to not being able to keep anything down for days" Bless her, gently wiping her mouth and massaging some nivea around her lips to prevent them drying up. I rubbed her feet, which she loved. I am psychic and picked up signs after she passed over. The month has a connection to me and my partner, and the dates and time ..... we were the only ones there for her those 7 years..
Just this morning my brother received a call from our mother's hospice nurse that she is not expected to make it through the weekend. I've never heard of skin mottling before, but saw it today. Thankful that we were all able to be with her. We told her it was okay to let go and prayed to God that she have a peaceful journey. Goodbye momma.
I'm ao sorry to hear this 😥💛💛
@@dr.paulinemoyaert thank you 🤎
Thanks so much for this video. It is helping me process my grandma's last days
You're so welcome! Glad it helped! 💛💫
I love the polite replies you are leaving to these insane comments
Thank you, Michael, really appreciate this comment 💛💛😊
To be clear, most of them are sincere, just the few that are like ???
@@michaelmoran9020 I think that's 'the internet'. I I don't pay much attention to it ;)
My mom passed away yesterday and experienced all these signs with her
My condolences 💫😥
@@dr.paulinemoyaert unfortunately she broke her femur and after her surgery she didn't look the same so I knew her time was coming and took care of her until her last night of breath.
I am gonna be honest, my mom died 2 years ago, it's hard to talk about it, but she came across all 5 signs.
Cannot reverse the time, but brothers, be aware of your parents health situation. Trust me! Enjoy your parents!
Very informative and understood Thanks
Thank you!
Thank u now I understand
A lot.God Bless u
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Thank you for this wonderful video. I wish people would realize that death is like birth they both result in entering new worlds. People often torture their loved ones trying to keep a dying person alive. Yes, we don't want to lose our loved ones but having their body suffer in a bed is not living.
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My Nan's last words to me were 'I'm thirsty' and I wanted to get her some water but was told she isn't allowed water. I believe NHS policy was to deny water in order to speed up death. I now feel it is evil to deny water to someone who is awake and asking for water but I was only 15 years old at the time and thought the nurse knew best. This is just one of the reasons I no longer fully trust medical professionals.
I agree that if someone asks for water, we should definitely give them water. I'm so sorry to hear this.
They could have at least wet her lips and given her a small amount of water. 😟
Since may 20212, starting with my younger brother than my mom in October , my father in law three weeks ago and just a few days ago my friend passes away make me realise how dead come without warning no matter what is your age and your health condition and everyone will experience it, make me realise to do something good that my friends will remember me for 😢
I'm so sorry to hear this, Ptyty. My condolences 😥💫😢
@@dr.paulinemoyaert Thank you ❤️
Thank you so much for this great video it is highly educating. More grease to your elbow and more wisdom always. 🙏
Thank you, Olukayode 😊
Very informative!! Would like to know what a person on the deathbed thinks about?
I don't think they think about much 😉 (their brains don't really work anymore, they're shutting down)
Good explanation thankyou 🙏🙏👍
You are welcome, Ramanarao 😉💛
My mom stopped eating a couple days before she died and there was swelling in the hands and feet before that. I think there was coldness too. And she had the Chenne (sp?) Stokes breathing the day of her death. That’s a rapid hyperventilating followed by slower breaths. Surprised it wasn’t mentioned in the video. Even before that the breathing would slow at times.
None of my videos are perfect. An updated video will be published next month, that video will mention Cheyne Stokes Breathing :)
My grandad had all the symptoms. He stopped eating and drinking for weeks. He lay in bed and barely moved. We knew he was dying. And stay with him until his death.
I'm so sorry to hear this. My condolences 💫😪
My Nan died 10 year ago and went through the not eating or drinking stage and the sleeping more stage. My mum tried pushing her to eat which just led to arguments definitely not worth it as it just prolongs a life not worth living if anything. She had 4 pairs of carers each day and would alternate between going to bed and getting up so she would be in bed at night and In middle of day. She was unable to do anything so just stayed in whatever position carers put her in. This went on 5 month.
Thanks for sharing this story, I'm so sorry to hear this 😢💫
Thank you Dr Moyaert 🙏🏾
A difficult but fascinating watch 🖐🏾 🤎
Thank you 💛😊
my father died due to kidney failure and sepsis... he was in ventilator and slept most of the time in his last days i couldnt be there during his last moments the nurses did not even inform us during his end moments .... it was so cruel of them ... he was only 58
I am watching, because I am suffering from mottled skin on and off. It is not related to cold. The case is how I understood, in those times my body is hard at maintaining life and every bit of energy need to be saved to keep me alive. Now, to find a doctor who takes me serious about this is very difficult.
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Thanks for your knowledge..my mom passed away 2022 ..heard her breathing sound like you said ..exact same sound..😟😢
I'm so sorry for your loss 😪😥
Me too. The sound is identical to how my mom sounded when she died. She left us in 2022 as well.
Very helpful video! Thank you!
Thank you for educating.😢😢
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@@dr.paulinemoyaert I m learning how to understand my in-law last stage of prostate cancer spread to lung ... Heart breaking...🧠🧠🧠😢😢life...,. Live for this moment.... Thank you again 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏
When my grandmother was dying, she came out of a coma and asked where she was? I told her and she said she didn't want to be there because she had been in Africa and Asia and everywhere. I call death GOING TO DANCE ON THE WIND because they slip away and go DANCE ON THE WIND.
Thanks for sharing, Jude 💛
November 11th 2021 I lost my mum November 5th 2022 my sister died
I'm so sorry to hear this. My condolences 😢
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I lost my beautiful 53 year old sister in June 2021, I lost my mom Nov 2022. Extremely painful time
I lost my mom in 2019 and my wife in 2020. You have my condolences.
Condolences x
Thanks for sharing this video with us,🙏🙏
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This is true, before my father passed away, 24 hours earlier he slept while making a sound like a death rattle
Very helpful.
Thanks 😊
Most welcome, Johan 😊
I lost my grandpa yesterday, this was exactly what happen
I'm so sorry to hear this. My condolences. 💫😔
Sorry for your loss. My brother died yesterday.
@@CajunAdrienne sorry for your loss
@@kasvith I know how you feel if you saw her decline more & more each week.
@@CajunAdrienne its so sad to see...specially when they stop eating :(
Its really hard to loss our love ones specially when you are not there at the very moment when they are experiencing the dying stages which I regret in my lifw for my parents.
These happened nearly literally with my grandfather before he died. May his soul rip 💔
I'm so sorry for your loss, Salahh 💛💫
The death rattle sounds scary 😮
It is scary 😕😪💫
I’m 45 with end stage emphysema. This video clarifies my demise
😪
Not necessarily. My dad died at 77 after 10 years of irreversible decline with emphysema. That was 31 years ago.Toward the end, he developed heart failure and his feet swelled up, a telltale sign. They gave him morphine to relax whatever was left of the lungs so he could have better function. But in the end, the effect of the morphine stopped his weakened heart. He was under hospice care and had been hospitalized briefly (for the last time). The family had visited him on the last day, expecting him to be discharged to back home the next day. The nurse discovered after midnight that he had died in his sleep. He had been completely lucid and did not go through any struggle or agony at the end, but he had accepted for several months that he probably didn't have long to live. He didn't have the experience described in this video. Ask for the morphine if you are afraid when the time approaches.
I first noticed the mottled skin the day my aunt fell on the stairs to my folks’ home. We had just got home from errands. Over the next 4-6 weeks she had a steady decline and died Nov 4, 2022 from GBM.
Thanks for sharing, Elyse and I'm so sorry for your loss. 😪💫
I suffer from acute incontinence [I buy Depend diapers by the cartload] but I don’t have the other symptoms… so can I safely assume I’m not dying ???
You're not dying 😉
Now I know why my uncle’s hands were cold when he was dying, he was dead within a few hours after seeing him at the hospital.
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But it doesn't makes sense when it happens.. Still doesn't make sense for me 2 years later. There's always news about accidents or cancer. But never this. So it seemed surreal to see this in person. And even sadder to know it will happen to me one day. It doesn't make sense how the body simply decides to shut down when it's time. It's really confusing the consciousness given to us, the spatial and accrued learning awareness given to us. Either people are just incredibly mentally strong to ignore signals and pains in their body, or have zero pains, are ignorant to health sensory signals, or are incredibly aware to put in health and fitness work against decay and death. Sadly I have been trained and influenced since I was about 8 to listen to my body, to diversify foods as much as possible, to understand symptoms and pains and visual cues the body releases, and it's been great. But it's a nightmare too having this awareness and seeing someone die over time, and to understand that I must expect this to happen to me one day or worse painful cancer. Hmmh 😔. That's why relationships don't make sense to me, contractual agreements, overall morals and mannerisms, family blood line love preference, love, liking and preferences, fighting, social circles, and more... Sorry but none of this makes any sense to me. Anyways, nice video and may the ridiculous human life continue on.
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It is and most humans today are in denial to truth & suffering.
Acceptance is the only answer I have, learn to accept the inevitable years before it may happen.
Death is common, life is rare hence preserve and propagate the same.
To anyone who had just lost a loved one recently, let me tell you what will happen... I had lost a very dear relative 14 years ago and here is how the coming years happened for me.
You never go a day without thinking about that person. In the 14 years, 5,040 days, I had always thought about that relative once per day. It may be when you are alone, deep in thought, but you always think of them once everyday. Its guaranteed.
Second, even after 14 years it seems as fresh a memory as if it happened yesterday. The disbelief never ever leaves but the anger, bargaining, does.
This is the most imporant thing, if you lose a loved one, dont expect your life to be as happy as it was when they were around. Life after death of a close family or friend is guaranteed to be duller, less colorful, and less warm than it was then they were alive
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To je istina , sve sto ste rekli, izgubila sam majku prije pola godine, svaki dan pomislim na nju, ali bas svaki dan i zao mi je sto nisam vise vremena provela s njom. Umrla je u domu za stare kad sam joj dosla u posetu jednog vikenda. Cekala me je da dodjem, i onda je otisla, ali ne znam da li je bila svesna da sam pored nje. Kad sam je dozivala ucinili mi se u jednom momentu kao da me je cula, ne znam , mozda je to bila samo moja zelja da me ona cuje, uglavnom, sacekala me je majcica
With my cancer I am at the point I really do not eat but maybe one thing a day. I find my bottled water last longer. At times I feel I cannot get my bresth but only for a short time. Yes I find I either fall to sleep or it feels like I just passed out. It seems like my pain meds do not last, now every four hours. Cancer seems like a slow death ehen sll you can do is sit or lay most of tge day.
I prayed for you brother ❤
I was very close to my papa from a young age. That’s why I’m glad he died peacefully in his sleep. Bad thing is that he was driving at the time and the passengers didn’t make it because he hit a tree. 😢
😪💫 I'm so sorry for your loss.
This video was very helpful.
Thank you, Mochachino😊
Finally Someone making a medical video *NOT* look and sound like a fucking horror movie :'V good info ty! ^^
Hahah, thank you so much! You made my day! 😍😍😊
Thank you for this video.
My pleasure! 💛
My Dad had pneumonia, Sepsis, IV Antibiotics…. Didn’t eat for 6 days. Drs called the priest. He is a miracle!
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I witnessed death rattle almost 6 months before my Moms death at the time medication and oxygen helped her health also improved for 6 months but the weakness caused due to slower heart due to low blood flow to hands and legs couldn't be much recouped and her appetite also could be recovered after 6 months of struggle she died.
I'm so sorry to hear this. My condolences.
@@dr.paulinemoyaert Thanks for the acknowledgement.
My Mother passed away at the 8th february
The death rattling was a horror
but atleast i know it wasn't a too heavy burden for her last way
I'm so sorry, my condolences. 💛💫😥
TRANQUILIZE FOR COMFORT ALWAYS.
Thank you for your valuable feedback.
My experience with the death rattle was not due to anything in my throat. It came from the lungs and it gets some attention in ICU.
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Good video, thank you
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They also begin to see their loved ones that passed before them
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Thank you.
You're welcome 😊
I am a nurse, LVN in CA. one of the strangest things I have ever experienced has happened twice to me. While working in an SNF I have had two times where a patient has died and then right before the end of the shift a second patient dies. It is the demanded thing I have ever seen.
Thanks for sharing this, Daniel! 💛
God is with me and mine keep us safe in Jesus name we pray
Amen
Oh my gosh I experience all these with my mum a month ago
I'm so sorry to hear this 😢
This video is good for guidance..
Thank you. 😊😉
Well that cheered me up.
I'm very glad it did! Enjoy your Saturday, Wayne! ☀️
My dad was himself a doctor and had told us 4 months back that his death is approaching.we tried our level best with medications but could not save him.he died in jan 2023.
I'm so sorry for your loss, Anuprita 💫😪
February 22 2020 my Papa Allen (dad's dad passed away) December 22 2020 my dad himself pass away..April 6 2021 my uncle Mark passed away..
I'm so sorry to hear this. My condolences. 😢💫
My grandma died just recently at 99 years old 😢
Hi watching this when my Uncle is sleeping without food for so many days
my dad have lung and colon cancer he have 2 weeks I'm so sad I'm going to lose my dad
I'm so sorry to hear this, Kameta 😥. Take care.
so cartman was right about the last part?
Huh?
@@dr.paulinemoyaert I think it's a reference to the show south park ☺️
@@naudianeels1328 Haha, thanks for helping me out! 😂I had no idea what he was talking about.
@@dr.paulinemoyaert No problem. My husband loves that dumb show. Lol 😂
Will people experience all 5 when dying? My Nan is in the dying phase right now and we thought last night would be her last with the cheyne stroke breathing but today she went back to drinking lots of fluids (2 complan, 2 fortisip, 1000ml of water and 2 cups of tea..) is this common?
No, people won't experience all 5 signs. It is possible, especially at the end, but not a necessity. You have to see the dying phase as a horizontal line that goes up and down. One day, it will be a very bad one and you'll think that the end is very near. And the other day, she seems miraculously better. This can all be part of the dying phase. It's not an exact science, every person will display different symptoms. Take care! (Short answer to your question: Yes, this is common and totally normal)
I watched my mother die of dementia and cancer it wasn't pretty.. she has been gone for a few years now..
I'm so sorry to hear this, Kate. My condolences 💛
@@dr.paulinemoyaert thank you..
The evening before my 94 year old mother died she ate a full order of shrimp with snow peas from a Chinese restaurant and then she literally started grabbing some of the beef with eggplant that I was eating, as if to say I don't care what you want I need lots of food! It's important to understand that my mother was 88 pounds and just barely 5 feet tall!
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If the patient has decreased appetite, then why do they want food and drinks sometimes?
Because not all patients are the same 😊