I HAVE STAGE 4 non small cell lung cancer .. they said that I was in a good candidate for chemotherapy or radiation so I’m on KEYTRUDA .. MY QUESTION IS HOW LONG DO I HAVE TO LIVE AND HOW LONG DOES IT TAKE FOR CANCER TO METASTASIZE TO THE BRAIN OR OTHER ORGANISMS AND THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR COMING UP HERE WE LOVE YOU VERY MUCH AND THANK YOU FOR HELPING MANY PEOPLE TO LIVE, OR TO DIE 💚
@@godschild3640 sorry to hear this.......the biggest problem is that nobody can predict the amount of time. Talk to you MD, and keep is close touch with him/her. Best of luck!!
@@godschild3640 I'm so sorry, but I can't answer that. I don't know where you're from, I don't know your medical history, where the metastases are, etc. And éven if I know, it would still be impossible for me to say how long you have to live. This is something you should discuss with your oncologist. I'm sorry.
My dad died peacefully at the age of 95 as I held his hand sing and prayed him through the valley of the shadow of death. Thanks for explaining the process, it was exactly as you stated and the attending nurse told me what was happening. I stayed with my dad until he took his last breath. Rest In Peace Dad.
My Dad died 33 years ago, suddenly while away from home, heart attack, I still think of him and miss him on a daily basis.....ironically and frustratingly, I CAN'T hear my Father's voice in my mind when I try to recall how it sounded, even though I CAN remember how just about everyone else "sounded" that have already passed.....weird huh! I have 2 daughters, I can only hope they're as wonderful as you were with your Dad, kudos to you.
I was alone with my mother her last day. I too held. mom's hand and sang some Irish songs, along with songs we sang in the choir at church.. Death came exactly how it was in this video. My mother passed about two minutes before she died. I thought the morphine caused her stopped breathing. I now know it stopped her gasping for breath. She died so peacefully it was an honor to be with her,her last hours. She died 3 days before her 95th birthday. I miss her so much.
@@brendandoherty2159 I am the same. When my dad passed away I forgot how his voice sounded and sometimes I get frustrated when I can’t hear him in my head but my sister who has a different dad to me tells me she still remembers his voice and laugh
I was present when my mum died at age 90 years. It was very peaceful. One moment she was looking at me, and the next she closed her eyes and died. This was 23 years ago and it seems like yesterday. Miss her as we all do our parents.
Question did they drug her Was she? not able to wake up. Then I would call that murder. Sorry to rub this in or say this. But I'm going through a nightmare realizing what they did to my mother. I need answers. Hope I don't upset you. 90 is an old age, but if there were things they could have done rather than drugging the person to go to sleep. Then I'm sure there's something better.
No Mike. Drugs were not given to my mum. She died very peacefully from old age as she had no sickness. She wasn’t in pain so there was no need to give her any painkillers.
@@mikecampbell6001Murder? Of a 90 year old woman who was already dying? What is wrong with your psychological state to make you say something so bizarre and ignorant to someone??
I went through this with my mom two years ago. I played her favorite gospel music (Mahalia Jackson), prayed, and cried. She went away in such a peaceful state. Mom just drifted away.
@@gyaanduniya2014 How could who type what? One person is sharing their experience of their mother passing. The content creator expressed sympathy for her loss. I don’t see what’s wrong with either of their comments.
My dad lived with us for his last 6 years. He died at 88 in our home. He was in hospice care. He knew and accepted it. He said things like, "I'm going away". As his son, I did not know how to handle his comments. All I could say was, "we're all going away...eventually". On one of his better days, he also said, "It's been a great ride". Just like in this video, he died very peacefully in his sleep. No drama. He just didn't take his next breath. A few days before he died, his personality changed. He wanted me to stay next to his bed and hold his hand. I was more than happy to do that. In my entire life, we never even hugged. I was shocked. One day, for no obvious reason, he started crying. I had never seen him cry in my whole life. The whole process was an emotional roller coaster but something I am glad I could be there.
Wow! Thank you for sharing! I’m in hospice also, I have about 4 months left. Did your dad say anything about seeing anyone? That passed away? I feel my mom, and my cat Miss Violet, who has passed also. Every time night Violet will come and make biscuits by my feet! Last night she was doing that and then later down by my legs. I could feel her! I feel my mom around me also, I can smell her too. She always wore Bird Song! Please let me know if he said anything like that to you! 💜💜
@@lettyapfel2806 I'm sorry to hear about your situation. My Dad didn't say anything about seeing people - past or present. His personality changed when he got near the end. He was not in pain...the hospice nurse took good care of him.
@@GregSr yes, they are taking care of me also. They gave me pain pills, they are the strong. But, yesterday was a hard day, I had to start planning my own funeral! Let me tell you it get surreal. And it sank in and all day I was crying! I wasn’t crying for myself, it was for my husband and my family! I can talk, walk, and am conscious, but the hospice nurse said it’s coming! Thank you for sharing your story! I greatly appreciate it! And it sounds like you’ve been an awesome son to your dad! Take care, and God bless you you and your family! 💙❤️💜🩷
My husband experienced most of the signs before he died. It's comforting to know that it was not painful for him during those times that he experienced it. I love my husband very much and I'll never forget him.
When we gathered at my Dad's bedside, it was because a thoughtful, professional nurse knew the end was very near. It was very difficult, but I would rather have been there than not be there. Thank you to all the health professionals who help us handle this exact situation.
I find it really helps to know that a loved one is dying. When my family member was ill, we took him to a different doctor because we all felt he was terminal, but his doctor refused to discuss anything about the future.
Thank you so much. This was very helpful. Mom died last month and much of these signs were there. As an RD, it was helpful when you stated, “remember they are not dying because they’re not eating. They’re not eating because they are dying.”
Maybe she just had infections. They could have gave her medication and got better at any age. Instead the way I feel they drugged my mother until she went to sleep. Water without 3 days would be at nightmare. No matter how much pain medication, they give you?
I truly feel that they drugged her until she fell asleep. Because to my experience, she wasn't eating. At the same time it turned out that she had bladder infection. That right there would make you not want to eat. She had water in the lungs. Why didn't they try to take the water out and put my mother on ivy. And at the same time give her medication. My mom was 87. I still feel that they should have gave her medication. Instead of paying killer and drugged her until she went to sleep. Three days without water. No one could survive longer than three days with no water. I'm very angry and I need answers because i'm not stupid and I know what they did..
@@mikecampbell6001were you there with her ? Why didn’t you ask them all those questions and have them explain it to you ? They are the only ones that know what was going on with your mom.
I looked after my husband throughout his illness -oesophagus cancer - and this video shows exactly what happened to him in the last week of his life. He died on 12 February 2023. However, about two hours before he died the district nurse had been using the sponge sticks we had bought to clean the brown fluid from his mouth which was open and he was unconscious. She had to leave our bedroom so I took over and told him what I was doing. When I tried to take the sponge out of his mouth he clamped his mouth shut and I couldn’t get the stick out. I gently told him that he must let the sponge stick go and he did. This happened four times before the district nurse came back in. It didn’t happen when she continued to do it. She said it was his way of communicating with me which was a blessing to me. I was able to give him the death he wanted - at home in his own bed. I miss him so much though as we had been together 60yrs since we were 13yrs old and married at 20yrs.
I am deeply sorry to hear about the loss of your husband. It sounds like you were a devoted and loving caregiver, and you did everything you could to make sure your husband was comfortable and cared for during his illness. It's evident that you had a very special and long-lasting relationship, and it's understandable that you miss him greatly. I know that the grieving process can be a long and difficult one, and it's different for everyone. It's important to take the time to grieve in your own way and at your own pace. Remember to take care of yourself during this time, and to lean on your loved ones for support. Your husband will always hold a special place in your heart, and the memories you shared together will stay with you forever.💛
@@Alpha_7227 He was diagnosed on 4 June 2022, had numerous tests CT scan, PET scan, staging laparoscopy and then started an aggressive chemotherapy. He was blue lighted to hospital four times and contracted (whilst in chemotherapy) the superbug CDiff, burst ulcer which didn’t show up on any scan but burst because chemo had stripped his body, hospital acquired pneumonia, Covid. He had his operation on 3 November 2022 which went well but on 28 December a CT scan showed aggressive cancerous tumours all over his liver and he was in a lot of pain. Basically we were told to go home and live what time he had left as best as he could. He gave up fighting. In hindsight I wished he had never had the chemo and operation and that we had just continued with organic alternatives which me and my daughter had started him on after his initial diagnosis and he had started to eat a bit better. But hindsight is a wonderful thing.
Thanks. When my wife was passing she became hot and flushed rather then cold. She had MS for 26 years. The signs that helped me were eating less, sleeping more, talking less. Her breathing near the end was distressing for us but not for her. I found understanding these signs a real help. But both my adult children did not want to know about them. Everyone is different and our grieving is often different.
Hospice nurse here. I really appreciate your simplified explanations as it helps to relay this information to our patient's families in a way they can understand. Thank you!!
Hospice nurses are the best. Yall are so educated in your work. Yall told me what to expect when my mom was passing all the stages of passing away. I thank yall.
My mother wasn't able to sleep it went on like this for seven months. Also she wasn't able to eat properly. I told her to the palliative care And no more than two days she fell into a deep sleep very fishy. She only had a bladder infection. I'm not a shit disturber i'm always sticking up for government police. But something here turn me against everything. I truly feel that they had drugged my mother until she wasn't able to stay awake.. Now what is haunting me is that she wasn't able to eat or drink. At any minute anymore because of being drugged to sleep.. You can't survive longer than three days without water. Why didn't they give her the medication for the bladder infection and kidney infection. Obviously that's why she wasn't able to eat. Instead I feel they dragged her until she wasn't able to stay awake. No water for two days she wasn't in this care for longer than four days. Something fishy I need answers I can't stop thinking about what they did. I demanded them to put her on ivy and give her medication for the infections. They said to me that your mom is just passing away I don't believe that one bit. I'm so angry and I'm so depressed. And I don't think I'm looking or blaming. I just feel that i'm right she was not ready to go😭😭 She wanted everything possible except for c p r They could have took the water out of her lungs Put her on ivy Game for medication for infections at least try. But they didn't try so I can't rest I need answers
I saw most of this things with my grandmother a year ago when they gave her days to live..but we refused accept that and put our trust in God. Thanks to God she is alive now better
Are you serious or just trying to give hope? I'm not being rude. My mom just got diagnosed with stage 4 bone cancer and was given a week.they send her home tomorrow to "get comfortable" I understand different situations....but need hope
@@JerryFlores-ui7xyI am so sorry to hear about your mum. You can always hope but it is better to do and say all you want your mum to know before she passes. Stay strong.
Well, i lost my grandfather last week Thursday. It gives me a great comfort that in his last days in the ICU in which he was there for 9 days he went through each of these stages. I’m so happy he’s now in a better place and not suffering anymore. Thank you for your video. It has really given me peace and strength to carry on, knowing what I know now.
So interesting. I nursed my husband for six months before he passed away. It all makes so much of sense now. Thanks 🙏 for sharing. Love from South Africa 🇿🇦
Our lives are fleeting, like whispers carried away by the wind. Often, we fall into the illusion that time is abundant, only to find that it slips through our fingers like grains of sand. Let us no wait until the last moment to seek communion with the Lord. We cannot know if that opportunity will remain. To everyone reading this message: Seek the Lord with your whole heart. He loves each of us profoundly and unconditionally. His presence is a sanctuary, a source of eternal peace and joy. In His light, may we all find the path of eternal life. Amen. ❤🙏
This is so helpful! I have been privileged to be with two close family members when they were passing and I noticed several of these signs as their respective journeys in this world were ending. One of them would point into the air in his last days and when asked what he was seeing he’d say “flowers.” The other just kept his eyes closed as he passed. I hope that when my time comes I’ll have just as peaceful a death as they did.
My mom passed away from end stage Parkinson's, dementia, and a stroke that paralyzed the left side of her body. She had all the signs you described in this video just days before she passed. I was right by her side when she took her last breath. It was the most difficult thing I had to overcome in my entire life.
My Dad is not in hospice care, but he is in a nursing home. He is going to be 90 soon. I have noticed that his breathing is audible, has no appetite (he is now 108 lbs), and his 'business' in order for awhile now. While this is normal in later years, lately he has been making sure we are prepared for when he is no longer here. I'm tears as I type this, but I am reading other posts of parents and loved ones who have passed, and I want to say God bless you. ❤
It was the agitation that really upset me at my fathers demise. I still go over it now on waking after 18 months. The sense of utter helplessness and despair and not being able to do a thing. I had no idea this was a well documented part of the process. I hope your video might bring me and others a little comfort over the devastation of losing a loved one. Thank you.
My father was also highly agitated in his last hours constantly fidgeting moving his hands . Once the syringe driver was put in he was peaceful and died in his sleep . Thanks to Nurses and Doctors
My grandmother passed away a couple of days ago. She was showing all of the first 3 signs, exactly the way you described. Thank you for letting us all know that these people likely didn't feel any pain. Very soothing, thank you!
I had already read a couple of booklets. They've been very helpful. Now that my wife is very likely in her last week, this short class has been helpful to remind me about not viewing her behavior as personal rejection.
My sister died of cancer on Monday.Watching this video I realised her legs were mottled a day or so before but her death was quite sudden.I didn't know the signs until watching this
Thank you for this explanation. As a hospice nurse I've found that there are always many questions around patient intake at the end of life. Also terminal secretions bring up even more conversations. Your presentation is clear and helpful for visual learners. Thank you for the time you put into creating this video. It is most helpful for caregivers.
I'm glad to hear that the agitation at the end is generally not painful. My dad had a long battle with cancer and was on a lot of morphine for a long time. One day a couple of months ago we found him unresponsive but he went into an agitated state for about 14 hours before passing away. It seemed like he was in constant pain during that time from the signs he was exhibiting but if that wasn't the case it makes me feel a little better because there was nothing anyone could do to help him. He was conscious and moving around (although only from the chest up) but not aware of anyone or anything around him. I'm just glad he didn't go on for days in that state.
People remember things or get delusional and see people others can't see. Death is the end of a journey. People return to their creator. We shouldn't see it as strange even though we are afraid of the unknown
Thank you for sharing this, RyePie. I'm sorry to hear about the loss of your father and the difficult experience you went through during his final hours. My deepest condolences to you and your family 😪💫💛
Susan my wife died dec 2020 stage 4 breast cancer, pain, she died grieving the knowledge that would be lost. She was in the top 1/4 of one percent SAT and I completely agree with her. She could do any thing we spent her last years watching spacex launches and musicals from the 1930's and discussing history.
Morphine can be given if a dying person is adgitaited or in pain or has difficulty breathing to ease the symptoms and make them more comfortable. My husband was given morphine and he passed quietly. (the use of morphine does NOT make the person die faster or kill them).
I watch my aunt pass away from cancer her breathing was very loud but slowly got quieter and very shallow until she took one and another didn't follow. Our time on the earth is short so don't judge anyone for anything everybody is here just living their own life experience.
Thank you, Dr Paulien Moyaert, for precisely explaining the body's underlying situations in approaching death. Those signs were exactly the same when I experienced my mother's death three years ago. Because of the shortage of medical staff and their busy routine, nobody told me what would happen when those death signs emerged consecutively. The only thing I heard from the doctor was that my mother would die after she could not eat for ten days. Yes, it was true, but without knowing the more profound reason, I tended to feed my mother every afternoon when I visited her, and my brother did the same when he saw her in the evenings with a needle tube. After she started vomiting several times, her food intake was almost none. We didn't want my mother to starve to death. On the last afternoon, my mother departed when I tried to clean her body as usual, I found one of her right lower limbs turned purple and looked terrible. Yet nobody could tell me what was happening. I had prepared for my mother's death for two years since she was diagnosed with brain cancer. But the uncertainty of the day she left always stressed me as I wanted to be with her at her final moment. I have been feeling guilty because I have doubted my caring efforts for my mother. Your video alleviate my sadness and guilty feelings very much.
I'm so sorry to hear this, and I can only imagine how difficult it must have been for you to witness your mother's decline and eventual passing without proper understanding and guidance. Your story is one of the reasons why I made this video, people should know about this. It could take away some of people's sadness and guilt. Thank you so much for sharing your story.
Thank you so much forma this video because its Will be educational from my boys when his father flying. I'm from Nicaragua and I aprecietate so much this info.
I have no relationship with you and my parents are alive and I can’t relate to you but I’m full of tears worrying about one day I may have to suffer the loss like you, thanks to the doctor for explaining these things 😢😢😢
😂u Yes i have heart failure after walkinto shops. My energy has gone unable even to make a cup of day takes days recover but i have the rosary and at peace
Once he went in the hospital my husband never came home again. He wouldn't eat anything once he went in. Wouldn't eat hospital food, I cooked at home roast chicken, scrambled eggs, he still wouldn't eat. I held onto some hope that he would come home but it didn't happen. I also wasn't there when he passed, still bothers me.
I’m dying! I have about 4 months left. My kidneys are shutting down. I don’t believe in transplants. So far, I’ve had some of these. My husband is devastated. Tomorrow I have to go to funeral homes and pick and choose what I want! Thank you for this video! ❤
Honey,do the transplant.GOD bless you with more peace and healing. GOD is the one in control,GOD is greater than anything and any illness.I pray for your healing and everybody else's including mine in the mighty name of our Lord Jesuschrist. Pray honey,pray and thank GOD for keeping you until now.
Have to say that my 91 year old grandad was ill with pneumonia in hospital over the past 2 weeks, he wasn't able to eat, drink for days, he was cold and could not keep his eyes open. Honestly even after the doctors had said that the infection had improved but that his kidneys we're struggling and they thought he had a kidney infection now he still wasn't eating and very tired. The doctors weren't worried about the eating too much and honestly I thought he was days from dying because I knew these EOL signs but in the last 3 days he's much brighter, eating much much more, drinking more so hopefully things are going well
Things took a turn for the worse, today he went for a CT scan to check on the chest infection and fluid in lungs and actually it ended up with him being diagnosed with lung cancer. We aren’t too sure just how bad it is atm but they want to do a biopsy and pass it to the oncology team but he’s 91 so honestly I’m not really that hopeful.
My mother IL lived with us last 6 years of her life, Parkinson's disease ...at the end she developed renal cancer. She died in 2021 age 81. But before she died I was lucky to witness her last days while she was not responsive to us...but dancing ballet ( moving her arms and trying to move her legs) while we play her Chopin and Debussy. She was a ballet dancer and musician all her life. She was unable to move her arms and legs due to Parkinson's and broken spine ( cancer got there in the end) BUT.. somehow in a weird miracle way she raised her hands to play piano in the air before she died. She couldn't move her arms to brush her hair...and then suddenly she just does all the ballet movements...playing piano in the air and dancing...she died in my & my husband arms. She let out the last breath still pointing her feet like wearing ballet shoes...
This testimony TRUELY touches my heart, since my daughter and granddaughter do ballet. I happen to love it myself, along with those two musical composers. What a gift you gave her on that last day; to play this music for her and to see her miraculously (and perhaps even with some drop of joy) respond to it. She passed away doing what she loved..sweetly, delicately and quietly...on pointe as always. She was with those whom she loved. It was so special how you described her last beautiful moments of movements right into heaven. A blessed passing ...if there is such a phrase. God's grace and strength be yours.
PRAISE GOD GIVE GOD ALL THE GLORY DID WHAT SHE LOVED TO DO WHEN SHE WAS HEALTHY MY OLDEST BROTHER PASSED AWAY 04-08-24 HIS BIRTHDAY 04-17 KIDNEY TRANSPLANT 06-2024 EVERYTHING WAS BEAUTIFUL 09-2024 EVERYTHING WENT WRONG BUT GREAT MEMORIES EASTER SUNDAY WE ENJOYED HIM SO SO MUCH HE WAS SO HAPPY TO COME HOME IN TGE HOSPITAL 8 MONTHS. 110 CARDS TO HIS FAMILY WE LOVE HIM SO SO MUCH RIPH TO ALL ❤❤😊😊 TAKING FLOWERS ON FATHER'S DAY
The one you truly love, or the thing you truly love to do. Is when your life almost comes to a end...you take your last breaths, you still do the thing you love, the thing that will keep you going...until the end.
I am not a nurse or doctor but I wanted to know when my father was coming to end of life so I educated myself for 3yrs on the dying process on Google and RUclips and I was able to recognise every single smythom my father and mother had on thier journey towards death it was the most beautiful journey I ever witnessed in my life and was so blessed to have witness what I did , both had a beautiful death went into a sleep with me by thier sides ❤ ❤
Over the last 2 years I’ve seen both my parents and my step father die. Mum was a few months ago. That was in hospital. Sepsis leg infection, everything fine then 24 hours later she was gone. I was the only one with her holding her hand when she took her last breath at 3am. It’s a bit weird seeing people's life come to an end, but sooner or later every one of us will be taking that final breath. Try to get some enjoyment out of your life because before long it will end.
You're right! But we must ensure that we have a true relationship with God through Jesus Christ, so that we can enjoy eternal life after the end of this mortal life. (John 3:16 Hebrews 9:27)
I am so sorry. Let's all value that we can breathe and function right now, because one day we will be leaving earth, we won't be completely dead-our hearts will go on, the Journey on earth just ended.
I appreciate the way this video was presented with clear, well detailed information with a sensitive, patient focused approach. I have also personally noticed a markedly grey complexion prior to the death of relatives. Thank you Dr. Paulien!
Thank you so much, Kris. You have described in two sentences what I wanted to achieve. I'm glad that people appreciate the way I try to explain - sometimes difficult - topics 💛. Have a great weekend and thanks again. You made my day.
My belovéd Grandmother died on the evening of 11 November 1982. I was 9 years old, and a 'family friend' thought it would be wise to exclude me from her bedroom as she entered the 'active dying' process. This was harder to cope with, than the actual death itself! My late Mum and I cared for her, but to be excluded at the last moments was crushing....Now, in 2023, that 'family friend' passed away suddenly...I hope her family were excluded from being with HER in her final moments on earth, distressed, and without comfort! Decades have passed and I still remember that cold, snowy winters' evening when my Granny passed away
My mother is 88 yrs old & she was in the ICU at least 4 different times & faced all of it. Hypoglycemia & breathlessness due to collection of fluids in lungs have been responsible for her near death experiences. She almost died the 3rd time she was in the ICU and even came back to narrate her blissful experience in the heaven. She is alive & fine as of now.
God bless her. Protect her from all those who want to take advantage of her. No nursing homes no hospices. Take care of her at home. Get help at home. You can do it. I did it with my 103 year old grandmom.
Very helpful that you have this video. I recently went through this with my Father-in-law who was on hospice for 6 weeks prior to his death due to congestive heart failure. The hospice had us read some information they provided on end of life and the process and it was very helpful.
Thank you for this accurate medical symptoms to watch for. It explains it all perfectly. I wish I had this 4 yrs ago when I watched my unconscious father, with no food, liquid or I. V. live for 5 days while we all sat and watched. With no information on how long it would be, we worried about him constantly. We knew he was dying but didn't know how to tell when it was close. Thanks for making this so families can relax a little, knowing what's naturally occurring.
I went through the exact same thing and have always felt guilty for allowing my mom, to what I thought was, starve to death. Glad to know it was the humane thing.
Thank you for this. I have felt guilty for hospice not giving my mom any IV fluids for 5 days while she was unconscious. Now I know what was going on in her body and that it was the best thing for her. This information has given me much comfort.
This helped me so much, also. I felt horrible about ceasing fluids for a family member who came home to die, but he was much more comfortable and his pain reduced considerably. It was definitely the right thing to do!
As a hospice chaplain, I cringe when I hear people say, "Hospice kills people." No it does not. It makes them comfortable so they can pass in peace. Blessings to you both for realizing that. ❤
I don't believe in hospices or nursing homes. I believe family members who are sick need to spend every minute of their lives with their loved ones at home, not with people who do not care about them. With my grandmom the nursing home had turned off the heat in her room ( I tried to bring an electric heater and they stopped me ), was not feeding her ( I had to do it), was not helping her to the bathroom ( I had to do it), etc. They are evil places. Eventually she developed a cough and ignored their own floor doctor to do follow up care on her. This shows you. I saw her with bruises on her face in the morgue and one of the evil " nurses ", a Filipino woman. responded by saying that may be it was just a " discoloration of the skin ". I think they beat her up because she would cry. The nursing home was experiencing more deaths due to a group of people there that were working in the building. Everybody was evil there. One of the Social Workers commented that that is the place where they die and they should die fast. That just shows you. Do not believe in their smiles or fancy buildings. You should see what goes on at night in those places. They have still dozens of wrongful death complaints in the Bronx courts, New York. The state does not go after these murderers in nursing homes the way they do in other fields because these places manipulate the system. Stay away from such places and from those who speak good about them because they are not telling you the truth !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!unless you want to see and live through the experience yourself.
I had in-home hospice care when my husband died. They were a lifesaver for me as I was scared to overmedicate him and how to handle it. I couldn’t have done it without them.
I lost my aunt from cancer when I was 12, by the time I didnʼt hear breathe, I immediately knew she was gone, all me and my family members could od was js cry.. And to this day, I still miss her :(
Thank you so much for this. We , the living need to know for our loved ones passing. All these symptoms I witnessed first hand with the passing of my sister. I knew she was going by all these signs. She had all these except incontinence. She was sound asleep when she passed.
Interesting! My grandma before she passed (after a very long illness) did actually exhibit some of these symptoms. I thought it was random but this explains so much 😊 I know she’s not in pain anymore which is what gives me comfort and she always said I’m not scared to go it’s the fear of the unknown not the action so she was happy at the end ❤ she was 78.
@@dr.paulinemoyaert It was one of those illnesses that just dragged on and on so I’m sure she’s glad to not be in pain anymore and she’s much happier for it so that gives me comfort 🙂 but I love how you explained it all which was also comforting.
My condolences…… my nana had dementia towards the end she had all these signs broke my heart dementia is a nasty disease. She was almost 80 she was a beautiful soul I miss her soooo much I’m telling you if I could I would have traded my life for hers she passed 5 days before her bday
My dad was suffering from CKD. I did a lot of research, and i prepared myself for what is to come. I witnessed the stages you explained, and it happened exactly as you said.😢 He passed away in my arms over a month ago. May he continue to rest in peace.
Dear doctor may God bless you with more wisdom and knowledge to be of Great help to the people of the whole world. God bless you all abundantly and fulfill all your heart's desires. Praise the LORD GOD ALMIGHTY FATHER in the mighty name of JESUS CHRIST for your Hard work. With love and prayers.
Our family has learnt a lot during the years losing love ones and friends. I believe family members should be told what stages a family member will go through. Losing my dad in 1978, an older brother in 1998, out mom in 2006, others then my sister in 2018 we tried to get them to eat and drink. It was when I was in the hospital I realized when your sick you just don't feel like eating that answer a lot for me. (Plus around 2015 when a friend died the hospital would give them those sponge suckers dipped in water or etc.. my sister who died in 2018 said they was awful tasting she made it clear not to put them in her mouth). Of all family members and friends it was my sister who saw others in her room or passing by her door when it was closed. It will get to a point they will say their tired if they're pass return let them go, tell them it's okay don't keep them here for you. I could tell you more but with my sister (59) my oldest sister and myself sat on each side of her bed heard the gargle watched her breathing when we got to 45 seconds a breath the nurses rushed us out cleaned and put her in a fresh gown now last period they will fold the blanket and sheet down half on them lay their arms down they may turn them on their left side. A nurse my look at their finger nails because the bottoms will be gray, look at the soles of their feet if they are blotchy circulation is leaving the body it won't be long.
Can u pls tell a bit more?? My grandmother is unable to control her urination and stool She is 99 Her both legs r swollen along with ankles She urinates and poops in bed too And right now the situation has gone so worse that she either sleeps with eyes open (may be due to medicines) or she sits bcoz she has urinated Or pooped She was mumbling something about my aunty multiple times last night When she wakes up and asks us to take her to washroom the poop keeps falling down from her dress all over the floor I can't get what is happening??? Pls tell if d end is near or not?
When my mom was dying, for the last 9-10 hours before she died, she could not close her eyes nor could she blink. She would just turn her eyes towards us to briefly look at us or she would stare straight ahead. The nurse told me that she had lost her muscle abilities to close her eyes and to blink. Even though she was conscious, she was no longer responding to us like before by nodding or shaking her head whenever we would ask her something. It was as if she could no longer understand what we were saying or what was going on around her. She would just look around by moving her eyes. Her breathing started to slow down minutes before she died and she died with her eyes open. I miss her so much but she is finally at peace. She lived for 87 years and for her entire 87 years plus 2 months, God gave her the ability to be able to walk without a cane or walker, to eat and bathe by herself, to talk, to see, and to hear well. She had dementia but she could still do everything by herself except remember things. Two and a half months before she died, she got sick with a uterine infection and Covid but got over these and what ended up killing her was sepsis because she somehow got a perforated colon and an abscess and doctors could not control the infection towards the end and she died this month, on April 6, 2023.
Sorry to hear of your loss. Praying for you and your family. My Mother deceased 11-07 - 2022. I was there when she took her last breath. Knowing that’s she’s no longer in pain, gives me peace. however, I still find myself crying a lot .. I miss my mommy 😢😢.
Sending lights 🕯️🙏. My grandma passed away May 2023 she was 88 and 4 months and she was the only parent I know in my entire life. Her cause of death was body-organs failure that includes heart,liver, kidney and hypertension but the Drs found it at it's last stage , she was at the hospital for 9 days and it was her first time in hospital because she was not the sicky person.... she would just visit her doctor for checks-up.
Yep have been there and done this many times in my life..................as an ex RN emergency Nurse i dealt with this so many times., adults, teenagers and babies......then I had to go through it personally with the loss of my mother and sister.........
Im sure it's not easy to work each and everyday see people dying may the Lord continue giving u more strength to help and assist with comfort to those theyve lost their loved ones May God bless u more and more Doctor
I am a nurse but when my mom died last October 2020, I didn’t recognized these signs, maybe because of being on denial when it comes to family members who are dear to me. Reminiscing on her last few days, i found out that she have had undergone these signs like decrease in appetite, agitation and breathing changes before we took her to the hospital; mottled extremities, and incontinence during her stay in the ICU. 😔
I'm really sorry to hear about the loss of your mother. It must have been a difficult and emotional time for you. Sometimes, circumstances and emotions can make it hard to see things clearly. I'm quite sure I would also miss some of the signs if someone close to me was dying. 💫😥
Not once or twice but on three separate occasions the hospital staff told us my father was actively dying. He's home (his own home) and doing well. Do not ever give up hope and P.S.....doctors are wrong A LOT
Thank you very much. We all face the death of our loved ones. The last few days is traumatic for those involved in end of life care. Your video provides comfort in addition to useful information.
Mum went through this, the agitation was the worst she stripped naked, and curled up the most valuable I've ever seen her, in the end she waited till we had gone and passed away, sometimes it's not good to stay till the end.
Alleine ist es leichter loss zu lassen, deshalb warten viele Sterbenden bis das Zimmer leer ist. Mahl eben Kaffee hohlen😂 Ubrigens, nach eine Sekunde fangt ein neues Leben an.
My mom died from Covid on Sept 8 2021 at 4pm. The death rattle was so loud, even louder when she would take a sharp breath in (she was comatose on her last day, so I’m hoping she didn’t feel it). She’d just got off quarantine the day she died so my brother and I got to be there for her… so she would know she wasn’t going to die alone. Somehow. I didn’t know I had Covid back then, and it was the delta variant… and through my not knowing I gave it to her. I live with that guilt every day since. But the damn death rattle… sometimes I have nightmares and I can still hear it as clearly as I could that day. When she passed, after my brother had long since left, I think I stayed for another three hours because I wasn’t ready to let go yet. I hope she’s found dad and they are both doing better than they were here. Sorry for the long response to a couple years old video. Great video as well.
My grandmother passed away from cancer back in 2007. The last time I saw her alive she wasn't eating, she had breathing issues, and her extremities were starting to become mottled, and while I didn't know these signs of approaching death back then (I was only 14 at the time) I still somehow knew that she wasn't long for this world. I think she knew it would be the last time she ever saw me as well, because the entire time my dad, grandpa, and I were at the hospital to visit her she didn't take her eyes off me once. She passed away about a week later.
My mother in law passed away 2023 december 16th she was surffring from lekuma (blood cancer) she was in palliatieve care at home,when she was passing she has all symptoms which you describe here ,it's really hard time to lossed loveones wi missed her very much may her soul rest in peace
My dad died few years ago main cause was a Pneumonia in a matter of 6 days we witnessed the detoritation and failure of other body organs one by one on the last day his symptoms were so identical what you just mentioned and i also truly belive he was not in a pain....
TQ the symptoms/patterns explained are accurate, precise in every sequence...i ve observed for almost a month, subsequent to my beloved mom's passing away recently.
I'm a police officer and a runner. We participate in 5k and 10k races for fun and exercise. They're also huge social events. All of them are fundraisers for needy causes. We had a Christmas run at a children's-cancer hospital. Santa Claus led the race, and we were his elves. It sounds corny but the weather was perfect. As we looped around the hospital, staff were holding a dozen-young children who were patients. They had the bald heads and were very sick. I will never forget the amazed looks and smiles they provided us. I don't know how much money we raised for them, and I don't know how many are no longer here anymore. But thank you Lord for giving me the opportunity to help. This has changed my life and made me a better person. One 4-year old boy said when they come to take him, he wanted to go in a fire truck. It happened and this was arranged. I'll participate in this yearly run for the rest of my life.
Healthcare Christian fellowships Internationally are training Health workers regardless of position to give Holistic care, i.e the much needed Physical care and Spiritial care.
My dad passed away in April 2023 from prostate cancer that spread to his bones. These symptoms are real and frightening because you know where it's leading to. I was happy to not see him in pain anymore. Cancer is no joke. Death is real and it's coming for all of us.
My husband passed on Mar 12, 2023. He had all symptoms. I knew them because I volunteered at hospice. Never thought I would bring him home on a Mon and passed on Sun. Prostrate. Bladder and spine. I knew when he wouldn't drink or eat and was agitated Miss him 😢
My 94year old mother spent the last 4 months of her life in a Care Home. She had previously lived alone for the last 32 years since dad died. Mother had carers and all the possible interventions to help her manage her stage 6 Alzheimers. She displayed all these signs before her death , just 3 week’s short of her 95 th birthday. We knew she had given up as soon as she entered the Home, but we have no regrets. Mother needed the professional care and support which we as family could no longer provide whilst she lived in her own home. Her death was a blessing and relief for all concerned.
My 93 Mom in law did exhibit some of these signs. However not all. From the time it looked like it might be near her end to the end was 10 days. Died Easter night. 2-3 days before her death she was talkative, quite cognitive. We thought she had turned the corner. Had actually been out for kids Easter egg hunt.
All I ask, is when I die I don't care when. Death in itself does not scare me. I embrace events that defines my humanity. What scares me are long, drawn out expensive, physically debilitating, suffrage. That scares the living hell out of me. I don't want to lose my mind, any more than I already have, lol. I don't want to be in so much pain that morphine doesn't touch the pain. I want to remember my life. I want to preserve my senses. I want to be able to wipe my own ass. I want to be ready and able to say "OK, I've completed my life. I'm good to go and today is a good day to die. Let's roll!!!" That's how I want to die. Otherwise, doc, please help!!!
Thanks for this Dr. As a palliative RN, this is a much better and simple way to assist healthcare professionals in explaining to family members and patients during EOL.
My father passed in Hospice in his apartment in 1989. He couldn’t eat solid food only a liquid diet. He drank some orange juice and joked about it as he could still do it. Then his breathing quickened and slowed and quickened and he was wet with sweat and agitated. The most scary thing was he ignored the two nurses and mom and looked right at me and then he passed the next second still staring at me. He was however never afraid of death. He had lung cancer that went into remission for five years before it came back. And he worked at his business from home before he couldn’t. He apologized for anything he did wrong when it came to me and told me he loved me. That’s all he left me. That’s all I cared about. Seeing him pass was traumatic. Sometimes I’m glad I was there other times not. My brother and his fiancé at the time came later that night. We followed to the hospital and saw him alone in a hospital head turned to me eyes still open. He was only 61. I miss dad so much.
My mother n law went through this with her father. He died at home on hospice. He was 87 years old. He lived a good life. I would call 87 years old a long life. ❤
my grandmother passed right before Christmas last year. She went through 2 or 3 "rallies" where it she became more active and very responsive, almost like her old normal self after a month or so of slowing down before hand..I miss her dearly :C
I find this Content extremely helpful in the natural process of dying. My mother trusts in God and has complete peace about dying but the family wanted to know what is the natural processes and this was extremely helpful. She’s involved with hospice and it helped me also to know to let her own appetite be her guide, and not to force her to eat. This video explained why that is. Thank you for the help for work you did in providing this video.
My Mother has cancer that she refused to address. and a broken hip (3rd time) which it was not fixed because she wouldn't be able to handle. She had skin cancer at different times which they took half of her ear and about 2 inches on her forehead. She had kidney cancer which they took one of them. She has had cancer on her leg which she refused to do anything with. It grows out if her leg and they have to remove what they can to eliminate the odor. She is now in the final stage if Alzheimer's. She is such a sweet and amazing person who has gone through so much in her life. We will surely miss her.
I remember 1 month before my father died he was already in bed. He had liver cancer. He smelled the grilled cheese sandwich I was making and he requested me to make him some as this was our favorite munchies. He had two bites of it. It was his last solid food intake before he passed.
The topic about death unites us all. You must stay strong in front of this painful loss of your father. All we can do is pray for them and surround yourself with your best friends.
Thank you Dr. Now I understand what my Mum was going though as She was in the stages of dying . Wish I had known then. I Thank you very much. I will attach these signs in my Trust for my children to understand. I am greatly indebted to you ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐🎖🏆⚘❤
In my experience, some people perk up the day or do before death. The lady I was staying with had a stroke and couldn’t speak or walk. The day before she passed, she was actually speaking to me. First words I’d heard her say.
That's exactly what my mother told me. The human body seems so interesting. Just that, she spoke about days and a couple of weeks of perking up before death. Thank you
@@chirpywiggins5796 hi! Bad nde End of alcoholism: Floor under bed turned into a black pit under bed. Knew I was about to fall into it. Good NDE; Had been in coma after surgery 6 days. A few weeks later, at home, a golden picture frame appeared in front of me. The picture was of rolling green lands with beautiful music. The frame grew bigger and bigger until I could have stepped into the picture. I said No. I want to finish what I am involved in. The golden frame disappeared.
I don't know why I'm watching this video. My grandma died from cancer back in November, and I wasn't able to be with her. I don't regret seeing her last moments very ill- as a few months prior to her passing, she was much stronger and I had happier memories This video makes me sad and miss her. She was like my mom, she raised me and I wish that my baby could've met her in time. I gave my baby, my grandma's name as her middle name in her memory
My husband died on February 5th of this year. He had a heart condition and had a pacemaker. His heart started to slow down and the pacemaker took up the slack. When it started only beating 35 to 45 bpm, I knew something was wrong. He slept a lot, and hardly ate, but still went golfing on the last day of his life. He hit a birdie, walked over to the golf cart, sat down, and closed his eyes. That's when he died. Around 10:00 in the morning. The hospital called me and told me that he had passed away. I knew that when I kissed him goodbye that I should have hugged him harder.
I am so sorry for your loss. Losing a loved one is never easy, and the pain can be overwhelming. I can only imagine the shock and heartache you must be feeling right now. My thoughts and condolences are with you during this difficult time. 💛😪💫
Thank you for this! My Dad has Alzheimer’s and has been immobile since July 2022 and confined to bed since December 2022, he has a very weak heart too , he is at home on hospice being cared for by me. His mottling comes and goes, he has constant sleep apnea and will stop breathing for 90+ seconds each time and is doubly incontinent. The curious thing is that he doesn’t want to eat but if finger food is in front of him he will sometimes eat some. He cannot tell if he is uncomfortable, in pain, hungry, thirsty, etc, so these end of life guides are confusing as Dad, when he does wake can’t cognitively identify his needs or desires. 🤷♀️ Our local hospice has been absolutely useless so we are just living and enjoying each day as it comes. When my Mum (with dementia and COPD) died in hospital she was agitated for a day and a half then slept two days before passing … no mottling or death rattle but she wasn’t given food or fluids.
You're very welcome, Jo. I am so sorry to hear about your dad's condition. It sounds like you are doing an incredible job taking care of him and ensuring that he is comfortable and well-cared for 💛. Are you and your family caring for him since July 2022? Does he get artificial nutrition (He has to eat something, no? Especially since it doesn't seem he is in the final phase of life - yet) I wish I could do something to help, sending you and your family all my empathy and support.
Hi Dr Paulien, Thanks for producing this very informative video. My dad had dementia, bedridden, on NG tube feeding, all the time sleeping, very rarely opens eyes for a minute or two, then closed again, never spoke or respond, in this status for 2 years.. There were 2 people posted 24×7 to assist him with feeding, changing positions, sponge bathing, physiotherapy etc.. Over this period he used to often develop bed sores, UTI, Aspiration pneumonia, and we used to treat promptly with a lot of medications, antibiotics, etc.. Gradually his fingers and hands became stiffened and hyper flexed and stayed like that. We were falsely believing that he will come out of this condition gradually one day and sincerely caring though we realise that he's suffering immensely by this bed ridden status for years. My query is, would he have felt all this discomfort in his body... being bedridden, unable to move himself, unable to do anything, aspirating while eating, pain due to bed sores, and from this status.. If he would have felt all this as a constant suffering, what we should have done differently.. If he would not have felt any of this, that would be a relief, but how could we explain it scientifically.. Thank you
Not sure from which country you are writing from but I would think your Father's doctors would have advised a legal painless ending of your Dad's life if there was no hope of recovering. I can't stress enough to have this understood and wriiten out as end of life directives by all of us ,when we are well ,just for the families that caregive and their doctor's own peace of mind. It is a sad process to go through ,I was told right away after so many tests that my wife would die soon ,the Drs.also stated I could have her on a feeding tube( as she could no longer swallow ,she was comatose) where she could live for many months but would eventually die from infection .
After catastrophic injuries from a car accident, I was sent to nursing homes. My hearing is just fine. In the nursing homes, I had to hear death rattles of other patients on three occassions. While I commiserate with the families and their dying loved ones, it became almost too much for me,... hearing this repeatedly, and there being nothing I could do to be of any help.
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As a physician myself, I find your explanation of the end of life spot on. Great job!
Thank you so much, Steven. You made my day. ☺
I HAVE STAGE 4 non small cell lung cancer .. they said that I was in a good candidate for chemotherapy or radiation so I’m on KEYTRUDA .. MY QUESTION IS HOW LONG DO I HAVE TO LIVE AND HOW LONG DOES IT TAKE FOR CANCER TO METASTASIZE TO THE BRAIN OR OTHER ORGANISMS AND THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR COMING UP HERE WE LOVE YOU VERY MUCH AND THANK YOU FOR HELPING MANY PEOPLE TO LIVE, OR TO DIE 💚
@@godschild3640 sorry to hear this.......the biggest problem is that nobody can predict the amount of time. Talk to you MD, and keep is close touch with him/her. Best of luck!!
@@godschild3640 I'm so sorry, but I can't answer that. I don't know where you're from, I don't know your medical history, where the metastases are, etc. And éven if I know, it would still be impossible for me to say how long you have to live. This is something you should discuss with your oncologist. I'm sorry.
Are two weeks of life left always around the right time or can a miricale happen
My dad died peacefully at the age of 95 as I held his hand sing and prayed him through the valley of the shadow of death. Thanks for explaining the process, it was exactly as you stated and the attending nurse told me what was happening. I stayed with my dad until he took his last breath. Rest In Peace Dad.
You are a very good daughter.
My Dad died 33 years ago, suddenly while away from home, heart attack, I still think of him and miss him on a daily basis.....ironically and frustratingly, I CAN'T hear my Father's voice in my mind when I try to recall how it sounded, even though I CAN remember how just about everyone else "sounded" that have already passed.....weird huh! I have 2 daughters, I can only hope they're as wonderful as you were with your Dad, kudos to you.
I was alone with my mother her last day. I too held. mom's hand and sang some Irish songs, along with songs we sang in the choir at church.. Death came exactly how it was in this video. My mother passed about two minutes before she died. I thought the morphine caused her stopped breathing. I now know it stopped her gasping for breath. She died so peacefully it was an honor to be with her,her last hours. She died 3 days before her 95th birthday. I miss her so much.
@@brendandoherty2159 I am the same. When my dad passed away I forgot how his voice sounded and sometimes I get frustrated when I can’t hear him in my head but my sister who has a different dad to me tells me she still remembers his voice and laugh
Exactly same my dad too ""I didn't get to him on time 😢
I was present when my mum died at age 90 years. It was very peaceful. One moment she was looking at me, and the next she closed her eyes and died. This was 23 years ago and it seems like yesterday. Miss her as we all do our parents.
I'm so sorry for your loss, Rocky.
What a wonderful way to leave ❤️
Question did they drug her Was she? not able to wake up. Then I would call that murder. Sorry to rub this in or say this. But I'm going through a nightmare realizing what they did to my mother. I need answers. Hope I don't upset you. 90 is an old age, but if there were things they could have done rather than drugging the person to go to sleep. Then I'm sure there's something better.
No Mike. Drugs were not given to my mum. She died very peacefully from old age as she had no sickness. She wasn’t in pain so there was no need to give her any painkillers.
@@mikecampbell6001Murder? Of a 90 year old woman who was already dying? What is wrong with your psychological state to make you say something so bizarre and ignorant to someone??
I went through this with my mom two years ago. I played her favorite gospel music (Mahalia Jackson), prayed, and cried. She went away in such a peaceful state. Mom just drifted away.
I'm so sorry for your loss.
How could u type this
@@gyaanduniya2014 How could who type what? One person is sharing their experience of their mother passing. The content creator expressed sympathy for her loss. I don’t see what’s wrong with either of their comments.
RIP to your Mom. My Mom is at this point we sing and pray with her as well .
@@kalea24 comment was likely deleted
My dad lived with us for his last 6 years. He died at 88 in our home. He was in hospice care. He knew and accepted it. He said things like, "I'm going away". As his son, I did not know how to handle his comments. All I could say was, "we're all going away...eventually". On one of his better days, he also said, "It's been a great ride". Just like in this video, he died very peacefully in his sleep. No drama. He just didn't take his next breath. A few days before he died, his personality changed. He wanted me to stay next to his bed and hold his hand. I was more than happy to do that. In my entire life, we never even hugged. I was shocked. One day, for no obvious reason, he started crying. I had never seen him cry in my whole life. The whole process was an emotional roller coaster but something I am glad I could be there.
Thank you for sharing
That was moving! 🙏
Wow! Thank you for sharing! I’m in hospice also, I have about 4 months left. Did your dad say anything about seeing anyone? That passed away? I feel my mom, and my cat Miss Violet, who has passed also. Every time night Violet will come and make biscuits by my feet! Last night she was doing that and then later down by my legs. I could feel her! I feel my mom around me also, I can smell her too. She always wore Bird Song! Please let me know if he said anything like that to you! 💜💜
@@lettyapfel2806 I'm sorry to hear about your situation. My Dad didn't say anything about seeing people - past or present. His personality changed when he got near the end. He was not in pain...the hospice nurse took good care of him.
@@GregSr yes, they are taking care of me also. They gave me pain pills, they are the strong. But, yesterday was a hard day, I had to start planning my own funeral! Let me tell you it get surreal. And it sank in and all day I was crying! I wasn’t crying for myself, it was for my husband and my family! I can talk, walk, and am conscious, but the hospice nurse said it’s coming! Thank you for sharing your story! I greatly appreciate it! And it sounds like you’ve been an awesome son to your dad! Take care, and God bless you you and your family! 💙❤️💜🩷
My husband experienced most of the signs before he died. It's comforting to know that it was not painful for him during those times that he experienced it. I love my husband very much and I'll never forget him.
I'm so sorry to hear this. My condolences 💫😥.
@@dr.paulinemoyaert NEVER forget him? One day you`ll die too and he will be forgotten, Sorry, but that`s the way it is.
@@hansundpepiWhat's wrong with you bro?
@@hansundpepino she will be with him in heaven. You are cruel to say what u said and as my grandma use to say you should have kept your mouth shut.
@@marywalker2896well said
When we gathered at my Dad's bedside, it was because a thoughtful, professional nurse knew the end was very near.
It was very difficult, but I would rather have been there than not be there.
Thank you to all the health professionals who help us handle this exact situation.
💛💛💛
I find it really helps to know that a loved one is dying. When my family member was ill, we took him to a different doctor because we all felt he was terminal, but his doctor refused to discuss anything about the future.
I agree. They are the best. 👏🏽
sc m
I was with my mom
When she died. It was peaceful and all these things occurred. It’s life and death meeting up and I was blessed to be a part of it.
Thank you so much. This was very helpful. Mom died last month and much of these signs were there. As an RD, it was helpful when you stated, “remember they are not dying because they’re not eating. They’re not eating because they are dying.”
Maybe she just had infections. They could have gave her medication and got better at any age. Instead the way I feel they drugged my mother until she went to sleep. Water without 3 days would be at nightmare. No matter how much pain medication, they give you?
I truly feel that they drugged her until she fell asleep. Because to my experience, she wasn't eating. At the same time it turned out that she had bladder infection. That right there would make you not want to eat. She had water in the lungs. Why didn't they try to take the water out and put my mother on ivy. And at the same time give her medication. My mom was 87. I still feel that they should have gave her medication. Instead of paying killer and drugged her until she went to sleep. Three days without water. No one could survive longer than three days with no water. I'm very angry and I need answers because i'm not stupid and I know what they did..
@@mikecampbell6001were you there with her ? Why didn’t you ask them all those questions and have them explain it to you ? They are the only ones that know what was going on with your mom.
I looked after my husband throughout his illness -oesophagus cancer - and this video shows exactly what happened to him in the last week of his life. He died on 12 February 2023. However, about two hours before he died the district nurse had been using the sponge sticks we had bought to clean the brown fluid from his mouth which was open and he was unconscious. She had to leave our bedroom so I took over and told him what I was doing. When I tried to take the sponge out of his mouth he clamped his mouth shut and I couldn’t get the stick out. I gently told him that he must let the sponge stick go and he did. This happened four times before the district nurse came back in. It didn’t happen when she continued to do it. She said it was his way of communicating with me which was a blessing to me. I was able to give him the death he wanted - at home in his own bed. I miss him so much though as we had been together 60yrs since we were 13yrs old and married at 20yrs.
@drpaulienmoyaert.. ? I don’t know how to do this.
I am deeply sorry to hear about the loss of your husband. It sounds like you were a devoted and loving caregiver, and you did everything you could to make sure your husband was comfortable and cared for during his illness. It's evident that you had a very special and long-lasting relationship, and it's understandable that you miss him greatly.
I know that the grieving process can be a long and difficult one, and it's different for everyone. It's important to take the time to grieve in your own way and at your own pace. Remember to take care of yourself during this time, and to lean on your loved ones for support. Your husband will always hold a special place in your heart, and the memories you shared together will stay with you forever.💛
Dear Dr the way u express makes a soothing phase in everyones heart..applause..keep going..luv from Tamilnadu..India
I am terribly sorry for your loss, may I ask how long did he have cancer for.
@@Alpha_7227 He was diagnosed on 4 June 2022, had numerous tests CT scan, PET scan, staging laparoscopy and then started an aggressive chemotherapy. He was blue lighted to hospital four times and contracted (whilst in chemotherapy) the superbug CDiff, burst ulcer which didn’t show up on any scan but burst because chemo had stripped his body, hospital acquired pneumonia, Covid. He had his operation on 3 November 2022 which went well but on 28 December a CT scan showed aggressive cancerous tumours all over his liver and he was in a lot of pain. Basically we were told to go home and live what time he had left as best as he could. He gave up fighting. In hindsight I wished he had never had the chemo and operation and that we had just continued with organic alternatives which me and my daughter had started him on after his initial diagnosis and he had started to eat a bit better. But hindsight is a wonderful thing.
Thanks. When my wife was passing she became hot and flushed rather then cold. She had MS for 26 years. The signs that helped me were eating less, sleeping more, talking less. Her breathing near the end was distressing for us but not for her. I found understanding these signs a real help. But both my adult children did not want to know about them. Everyone is different and our grieving is often different.
I'm so sorry to hear this, Ron. Thanks for sharing your story. My deepest condolences to you and your family. 💛💫
Saw my uncle dying,same symptoms,stage 3 liver cancer 56 years old yesterday.A great man left us,my heart is aching seeing him go.
I'm so sorry for your loss. My condolences 💫😥.
So sorry for your loss.😢
@@BonitaIrwin-fs8mp 😢
@@saadsohail6520 my heart aches for you. It will get better but it takes time & support of family & friends.❤
@@BonitaIrwin-fs8mp Thank you,I am more concern for his 2 kids aged 14,16😢and my aunt who became widow at a young age
Hospice nurse here. I really appreciate your simplified explanations as it helps to relay this information to our patient's families in a way they can understand. Thank you!!
Thank you, Kirsten! 💛😊
Hospice nurses are the best. Yall are so educated in your work. Yall told me what to expect when my mom was passing all the stages of passing away. I thank yall.
What if i told you your loved one is dying? Many would rather not want to hear that.
@@dr.paulinemoyaert its mostly close family at deaths.many are at home or hospice.I find doctors know the least about this supernatural event.
My mother wasn't able to sleep it went on like this for seven months. Also she wasn't able to eat properly. I told her to the palliative care And no more than two days she fell into a deep sleep very fishy. She only had a bladder infection. I'm not a shit disturber i'm always sticking up for government police. But something here turn me against everything. I truly feel that they had drugged my mother until she wasn't able to stay awake.. Now what is haunting me is that she wasn't able to eat or drink. At any minute anymore because of being drugged to sleep.. You can't survive longer than three days without water. Why didn't they give her the medication for the bladder infection and kidney infection. Obviously that's why she wasn't able to eat. Instead I feel they dragged her until she wasn't able to stay awake. No water for two days she wasn't in this care for longer than four days. Something fishy I need answers I can't stop thinking about what they did. I demanded them to put her on ivy and give her medication for the infections. They said to me that your mom is just passing away I don't believe that one bit. I'm so angry and I'm so depressed. And I don't think I'm looking or blaming. I just feel that i'm right she was not ready to go😭😭 She wanted everything possible except for c p r They could have took the water out of her lungs Put her on ivy Game for medication for infections at least try. But they didn't try so I can't rest I need answers
I saw most of this things with my grandmother a year ago when they gave her days to live..but we refused accept that and put our trust in God. Thanks to God she is alive now better
💛
I noticed this too with my grandfather the day before he died.. He died a month ago
Does she have dementia
Are you serious or just trying to give hope? I'm not being rude. My mom just got diagnosed with stage 4 bone cancer and was given a week.they send her home tomorrow to "get comfortable" I understand different situations....but need hope
@@JerryFlores-ui7xyI am so sorry to hear about your mum. You can always hope but it is better to do and say all you want your mum to know before she passes. Stay strong.
Well, i lost my grandfather last week Thursday. It gives me a great comfort that in his last days in the ICU in which he was there for 9 days he went through each of these stages. I’m so happy he’s now in a better place and not suffering anymore. Thank you for your video. It has really given me peace and strength to carry on, knowing what I know now.
So interesting. I nursed my husband for six months before he passed away. It all makes so much of sense now. Thanks 🙏 for sharing. Love from South Africa 🇿🇦
You're very welcome, Vrooda! Greetings from Belgium! 💛
This video is very accurate how my dad was slowing dying from cancer stage 4 leukemia. He just passed away a month ago and was 72 years old. :(
😢
Our lives are fleeting, like whispers carried away by the wind. Often, we fall into the illusion that time is abundant, only to find that it slips through our fingers like grains of sand. Let us no wait until the last moment to seek communion with the Lord. We cannot know if that opportunity will remain.
To everyone reading this message: Seek the Lord with your whole heart. He loves each of us profoundly and unconditionally. His presence is a sanctuary, a source of eternal peace and joy.
In His light, may we all find the path of eternal life. Amen. ❤🙏
This is so helpful! I have been privileged to be with two close family members when they were passing and I noticed several of these signs as their respective journeys in this world were ending. One of them would point into the air in his last days and when asked what he was seeing he’d say “flowers.” The other just kept his eyes closed as he passed. I hope that when my time comes I’ll have just as peaceful a death as they did.
My daughter,Jazana"e had all of these signs ,other than agitation,,fly high Angel 🦋 🕊...
My mom passed away from end stage Parkinson's, dementia, and a stroke that paralyzed the left side of her body. She had all the signs you described in this video just days before she passed. I was right by her side when she took her last breath. It was the most difficult thing I had to overcome in my entire life.
So sorry for your loss. I could relate to your experience because my mom also passed on a month ago trust me it not easy. It is well
@@josephjatto6759 no
I know exactly what you feel. My mom passed back in April. I too watched her take her last breath. I also watched the doctor pronounce her dead😭😭😭😭😭.
And mine as well ❤
My mom also passed away on 26th march due to sarcoma cancer stage 4💔she was just 45
My Dad is not in hospice care, but he is in a nursing home. He is going to be 90 soon. I have noticed that his breathing is audible, has no appetite (he is now 108 lbs), and his 'business' in order for awhile now. While this is normal in later years, lately he has been making sure we are prepared for when he is no longer here. I'm tears as I type this, but I am reading other posts of parents and loved ones who have passed, and I want to say God bless you. ❤
Thank you MzNoemi 💛💛
I believe that we should worship the science in this case, scientists in the past don’t get the credit they need, nor doctors.
I’m so sorry you are going through this. It’s is very difficult. 💕
My heart goes out to you. May he have a peaceful end… and may you never lose your love for your father.
It's awful but unfortunately in nursing care ect, people tend to loose interest in life and leave us all prematurely.
It was the agitation that really upset me at my fathers demise. I still go over it now on waking after 18 months. The sense of utter helplessness and despair and not being able to do a thing.
I had no idea this was a well documented part of the process.
I hope your video might bring me and others a little comfort over the devastation of losing a loved one. Thank you.
I'm sorry to hear about the loss of your father. My deepest condolences to you and your family. 😕💫😪
Death becomes us
B Chapple
It hit us hard 💔
My father was also highly agitated in his last hours constantly fidgeting moving his hands . Once the syringe driver was put in he was peaceful and died in his sleep . Thanks to Nurses and Doctors
My grandmother passed away a couple of days ago. She was showing all of the first 3 signs, exactly the way you described. Thank you for letting us all know that these people likely didn't feel any pain. Very soothing, thank you!
This is probably one of the most insightful and useful videos I've ever seen, whether on the topic of death or not. Thanks very much.
I had already read a couple of booklets. They've been very helpful. Now that my wife is very likely in her last week, this short class has been helpful to remind me about not viewing her behavior as personal rejection.
My sister died of cancer on Monday.Watching this video I realised her legs were mottled a day or so before but her death was quite sudden.I didn't know the signs until watching this
Thank you for this explanation. As a hospice nurse I've found that there are always many questions around patient intake at the end of life. Also terminal secretions bring up even more conversations. Your presentation is clear and helpful for visual learners. Thank you for the time you put into creating this video. It is most helpful for caregivers.
Havn worked in palliative care
I'm glad to hear that the agitation at the end is generally not painful. My dad had a long battle with cancer and was on a lot of morphine for a long time. One day a couple of months ago we found him unresponsive but he went into an agitated state for about 14 hours before passing away. It seemed like he was in constant pain during that time from the signs he was exhibiting but if that wasn't the case it makes me feel a little better because there was nothing anyone could do to help him. He was conscious and moving around (although only from the chest up) but not aware of anyone or anything around him. I'm just glad he didn't go on for days in that state.
People remember things or get delusional and see people others can't see. Death is the end of a journey. People return to their creator. We shouldn't see it as strange even though we are afraid of the unknown
Thank you for sharing this, RyePie. I'm sorry to hear about the loss of your father and the difficult experience you went through during his final hours. My deepest condolences to you and your family 😪💫💛
Susan my wife died dec 2020 stage 4 breast cancer, pain, she died grieving the knowledge that would be lost.
She was in the top 1/4 of one percent SAT and I completely agree with her.
She could do any thing we spent her last years watching spacex launches and musicals from the 1930's and discussing history.
@@theancientsancients1769 0.
Morphine can be given if a dying person is adgitaited or in pain or has difficulty breathing to ease the symptoms and make them more comfortable. My husband was given morphine and he passed quietly. (the use of morphine does NOT make the person die faster or kill them).
I watch my aunt pass away from cancer her breathing was very loud but slowly got quieter and very shallow until she took one and another didn't follow. Our time on the earth is short so don't judge anyone for anything everybody is here just living their own life experience.
Thank you for being a comforting caregiver and knowing that your contribution helps the patient and their family. Thank you 😊
Thank you, Dr Paulien Moyaert, for precisely explaining the body's underlying situations in approaching death. Those signs were exactly the same when I experienced my mother's death three years ago. Because of the shortage of medical staff and their busy routine, nobody told me what would happen when those death signs emerged consecutively. The only thing I heard from the doctor was that my mother would die after she could not eat for ten days. Yes, it was true, but without knowing the more profound reason, I tended to feed my mother every afternoon when I visited her, and my brother did the same when he saw her in the evenings with a needle tube. After she started vomiting several times, her food intake was almost none. We didn't want my mother to starve to death. On the last afternoon, my mother departed when I tried to clean her body as usual, I found one of her right lower limbs turned purple and looked terrible. Yet nobody could tell me what was happening. I had prepared for my mother's death for two years since she was diagnosed with brain cancer. But the uncertainty of the day she left always stressed me as I wanted to be with her at her final moment. I have been feeling guilty because I have doubted my caring efforts for my mother. Your video alleviate my sadness and guilty feelings very much.
I'm so sorry to hear this, and I can only imagine how difficult it must have been for you to witness your mother's decline and eventual passing without proper understanding and guidance.
Your story is one of the reasons why I made this video, people should know about this. It could take away some of people's sadness and guilt. Thank you so much for sharing your story.
Thank you so much forma this video because its Will be educational from my boys when his father flying. I'm from Nicaragua and I aprecietate so much this info.
I have no relationship with you and my parents are alive and I can’t relate to you but I’m full of tears worrying about one day I may have to suffer the loss like you, thanks to the doctor for explaining these things 😢😢😢
😂u
Yes i have heart failure after walkinto shops. My energy has gone unable even to make a cup of day takes days recover but i have the rosary and at peace
Once he went in the hospital my husband never came home again. He wouldn't eat anything once he went in. Wouldn't eat hospital food, I cooked at home roast chicken, scrambled eggs, he still wouldn't eat. I held onto some hope that he would come home but it didn't happen. I also wasn't there when he passed, still bothers me.
I’m dying! I have about 4 months left. My kidneys are shutting down. I don’t believe in transplants. So far, I’ve had some of these. My husband is devastated. Tomorrow I have to go to funeral homes and pick and choose what I want! Thank you for this video! ❤
God bless u 🙏
I got 4 months too started hospice this sucks and im scared i hope your ok
🙏🙏
Honey,do the transplant.GOD bless you with more peace and healing. GOD is the one in control,GOD is greater than anything and any illness.I pray for your healing and everybody else's including mine in the mighty name of our Lord Jesuschrist.
Pray honey,pray and thank GOD for keeping you until now.
May GOD BLEES YOU AND HAVE MERCY ON YOU I ASK GOD IN JESUS NAME PROTECT AND FORGIVE YOU .I ASK GOD IN JESUE NAME HELP YOU IN THIS TIME OF NEED..
Have to say that my 91 year old grandad was ill with pneumonia in hospital over the past 2 weeks, he wasn't able to eat, drink for days, he was cold and could not keep his eyes open. Honestly even after the doctors had said that the infection had improved but that his kidneys we're struggling and they thought he had a kidney infection now he still wasn't eating and very tired. The doctors weren't worried about the eating too much and honestly I thought he was days from dying because I knew these EOL signs but in the last 3 days he's much brighter, eating much much more, drinking more so hopefully things are going well
Things took a turn for the worse, today he went for a CT scan to check on the chest infection and fluid in lungs and actually it ended up with him being diagnosed with lung cancer. We aren’t too sure just how bad it is atm but they want to do a biopsy and pass it to the oncology team but he’s 91 so honestly I’m not really that hopeful.
@@marktucker208
How is he now?
He dead
@@marktucker208
Sad to hear. My condolence to you.
@@marktucker208sending love light and condelonces
My mother IL lived with us last 6 years of her life, Parkinson's disease ...at the end she developed renal cancer. She died in 2021 age 81. But before she died I was lucky to witness her last days while she was not responsive to us...but dancing ballet ( moving her arms and trying to move her legs) while we play her Chopin and Debussy. She was a ballet dancer and musician all her life. She was unable to move her arms and legs due to Parkinson's and broken spine ( cancer got there in the end) BUT.. somehow in a weird miracle way she raised her hands to play piano in the air before she died. She couldn't move her arms to brush her hair...and then suddenly she just does all the ballet movements...playing piano in the air and dancing...she died in my & my husband arms. She let out the last breath still pointing her feet like wearing ballet shoes...
This testimony TRUELY touches my heart, since my daughter and granddaughter do ballet. I happen to love it myself, along with those two musical composers. What a gift you gave her on that last day; to play this music for her and to see her miraculously (and perhaps even with some drop of joy) respond to it. She passed away doing what she loved..sweetly, delicately and quietly...on pointe as always. She was with those whom she loved. It was so special how you described her last beautiful moments of movements right into heaven. A blessed passing ...if there is such a phrase. God's grace and strength be yours.
PRAISE GOD GIVE GOD ALL THE GLORY DID WHAT SHE LOVED TO DO WHEN SHE WAS HEALTHY MY OLDEST BROTHER PASSED AWAY 04-08-24 HIS BIRTHDAY 04-17 KIDNEY TRANSPLANT 06-2024 EVERYTHING WAS BEAUTIFUL 09-2024 EVERYTHING WENT WRONG BUT GREAT MEMORIES EASTER SUNDAY WE ENJOYED HIM SO SO MUCH HE WAS SO HAPPY TO COME HOME IN TGE HOSPITAL 8 MONTHS. 110 CARDS TO HIS FAMILY WE LOVE HIM SO SO MUCH RIPH TO ALL ❤❤😊😊 TAKING FLOWERS ON FATHER'S DAY
The one you truly love, or the thing you truly love to do. Is when your life almost comes to a end...you take your last breaths, you still do the thing you love, the thing that will keep you going...until the end.
I am not a nurse or doctor but I wanted to know when my father was coming to end of life so I educated myself for 3yrs on the dying process on Google and RUclips and I was able to recognise every single smythom my father and mother had on thier journey towards death it was the most beautiful journey I ever witnessed in my life and was so blessed to have witness what I did , both had a beautiful death went into a sleep with me by thier sides ❤ ❤
💛💛
For some,the journey is easier ,if you are aware of the process...it becomes much less frightening.
Over the last 2 years I’ve seen both my parents and my step father die. Mum was a few months ago. That was in hospital. Sepsis leg infection, everything fine then 24 hours later she was gone. I was the only one with her holding her hand when she took her last breath at 3am.
It’s a bit weird seeing people's life come to an end, but sooner or later every one of us will be taking that final breath.
Try to get some enjoyment out of your life because before long it will end.
💛💛
You're right!
But we must ensure that we have a true relationship with God through Jesus Christ, so that we can enjoy eternal life after the end of this mortal life. (John 3:16 Hebrews 9:27)
@@olabisiogunnaike5157 The man in the sky 😂
Yes ..So many Christian's canont accept that the Jesus Christ belief is not held by other worldwide "people of faith".. to each there own of course.
I am so sorry. Let's all value that we can breathe and function right now, because one day we will be leaving earth, we won't be completely dead-our hearts will go on, the Journey on earth just ended.
I appreciate the way this video was presented with clear, well detailed information with a sensitive, patient focused approach. I have also personally noticed a markedly grey complexion prior to the death of relatives. Thank you Dr. Paulien!
Thank you so much, Kris. You have described in two sentences what I wanted to achieve. I'm glad that people appreciate the way I try to explain - sometimes difficult - topics 💛. Have a great weekend and thanks again. You made my day.
jatt only punjab
I’m so sorry ❤️
@@theresasyverson4479 🙏
@@theresasyverson4479 punjabi munda
My belovéd Grandmother died on the evening of 11 November 1982. I was 9 years old, and a 'family friend' thought it would be wise to exclude me from her bedroom as she entered the 'active dying' process. This was harder to cope with, than the actual death itself! My late Mum and I cared for her, but to be excluded at the last moments was crushing....Now, in 2023, that 'family friend' passed away suddenly...I hope her family were excluded from being with HER in her final moments on earth, distressed, and without comfort! Decades have passed and I still remember that cold, snowy winters' evening when my Granny passed away
My mother is 88 yrs old & she was in the ICU at least 4 different times & faced all of it. Hypoglycemia & breathlessness due to collection of fluids in lungs have been responsible for her near death experiences. She almost died the 3rd time she was in the ICU and even came back to narrate her blissful experience in the heaven. She is alive & fine as of now.
What did she tell you about heaven?
Jeez
God bless her. Protect her from all those who want to take advantage of her. No nursing homes no hospices. Take care of her at home. Get help at home. You can do it. I did it with my 103 year old grandmom.
Very helpful that you have this video. I recently went through this with my Father-in-law who was on hospice for 6 weeks prior to his death due to congestive heart failure. The hospice had us read some information they provided on end of life and the process and it was very helpful.
I'm so sorry to hear this. My condolences 💫😥.
@@dr.paulinemoyaert thank you
Thank you for this accurate medical symptoms to watch for. It explains it all perfectly. I wish I had this 4 yrs ago when I watched my unconscious father, with no food, liquid or I. V. live for 5 days while we all sat and watched. With no information on how long it would be, we worried about him constantly. We knew he was dying but didn't know how to tell when it was close. Thanks for making this so families can relax a little, knowing what's naturally occurring.
You're very welcome, Jules. I'm sorry to hear this. My deepest condolences to you and your family. 💛
I went through the exact same thing and have always felt guilty for allowing my mom, to what I thought was, starve to death. Glad to know it was the humane thing.
Thank you for this. I have felt guilty for hospice not giving my mom any IV fluids for 5 days while she was unconscious. Now I know what was going on in her body and that it was the best thing for her. This information has given me much comfort.
This helped me so much, also. I felt horrible about ceasing fluids for a family member who came home to die, but he was much more comfortable and his pain reduced considerably. It was definitely the right thing to do!
As a hospice chaplain, I cringe when I hear people say, "Hospice kills people." No it does not. It makes them comfortable so they can pass in peace. Blessings to you both for realizing that. ❤
@@sciencenotstigma9534o
I don't believe in hospices or nursing homes. I believe family members who are sick need to spend every minute of their lives with their loved ones at home, not with people who do not care about them. With my grandmom the nursing home had turned off the heat in her room ( I tried to bring an electric heater and they stopped me ), was not feeding her ( I had to do it), was not helping her to the bathroom ( I had to do it), etc. They are evil places. Eventually she developed a cough and ignored their own floor doctor to do follow up care on her. This shows you. I saw her with bruises on her face in the morgue and one of the evil " nurses ", a Filipino woman. responded by saying that may be it was just a " discoloration of the skin ". I think they beat her up because she would cry. The nursing home was experiencing more deaths due to a group of people there that were working in the building. Everybody was evil there. One of the Social Workers commented that that is the place where they die and they should die fast. That just shows you. Do not believe in their smiles or fancy buildings. You should see what goes on at night in those places. They have still dozens of wrongful death complaints in the Bronx courts, New York. The state does not go after these murderers in nursing homes the way they do in other fields because these places manipulate the system. Stay away from such places and from those who speak good about them because they are not telling you the truth !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!unless you want to see and live through the experience yourself.
We all have to die one day and leave this world 😢....You are really doing a great job
Thank you, Arham! ☺
I had in-home hospice care when my husband died. They were a lifesaver for me as I was scared to overmedicate him and how to handle it. I couldn’t have done it without them.
💛💛
They are wonderful ❤
I lost my aunt from cancer when I was 12, by the time I didnʼt hear breathe, I immediately knew she was gone, all me and my family members could od was js cry.. And to this day, I still miss her :(
Thank you so much for this. We , the living need to know for our loved ones passing. All these symptoms I witnessed first hand with the passing of my sister. I knew she was going by all these signs. She had all these except incontinence. She was sound asleep when she passed.
Interesting! My grandma before she passed (after a very long illness) did actually exhibit some of these symptoms. I thought it was random but this explains so much 😊 I know she’s not in pain anymore which is what gives me comfort and she always said I’m not scared to go it’s the fear of the unknown not the action so she was happy at the end ❤ she was 78.
Thanks for sharing your story 💛💛. I'm so sorry to hear this, my condolences 😥💫
@@dr.paulinemoyaert It was one of those illnesses that just dragged on and on so I’m sure she’s glad to not be in pain anymore and she’s much happier for it so that gives me comfort 🙂 but I love how you explained it all which was also comforting.
@@LawlessZ 💛💛
My condolences…… my nana had dementia towards the end she had all these signs broke my heart dementia is a nasty disease. She was almost 80 she was a beautiful soul I miss her soooo much I’m telling you if I could I would have traded my life for hers she passed 5 days before her bday
Same for my grandma 🕊️🕯️she passed away last month and she was 88 . My condolences to your loss💔
My dad was suffering from CKD. I did a lot of research, and i prepared myself for what is to come. I witnessed the stages you explained, and it happened exactly as you said.😢 He passed away in my arms over a month ago. May he continue to rest in peace.
LAST SYMPTOMS BEFORE DEATH
Dear doctor may God bless you with more wisdom and knowledge to be of Great help to the people of the whole world.
God bless you all abundantly and fulfill all your heart's desires.
Praise the LORD GOD ALMIGHTY FATHER in the mighty name of JESUS CHRIST for your Hard work.
With love and prayers.
Seen many videos of this kind but this is the first one explaining in simple English. Thanks
My grandmother passed away in 2020, she had Hospice Care at home. Everything you stated is accurate!!! Rest peacefully Ma!!
Thank you, Susan 💛
Our family has learnt a lot during the years losing love ones and friends. I believe family members should be told what stages a family member will go through. Losing my dad in 1978, an older brother in 1998, out mom in 2006, others then my sister in 2018 we tried to get them to eat and drink. It was when I was in the hospital I realized when your sick you just don't feel like eating that answer a lot for me. (Plus around 2015 when a friend died the hospital would give them those sponge suckers dipped in water or etc.. my sister who died in 2018 said they was awful tasting she made it clear not to put them in her mouth).
Of all family members and friends it was my sister who saw others in her room or passing by her door when it was closed. It will get to a point they will say their tired if they're pass return let them go, tell them it's okay don't keep them here for you. I could tell you more but with my sister (59) my oldest sister and myself sat on each side of her bed heard the gargle watched her breathing when we got to 45 seconds a breath the nurses rushed us out cleaned and put her in a fresh gown now last period they will fold the blanket and sheet down half on them lay their arms down they may turn them on their left side. A nurse my look at their finger nails because the bottoms will be gray, look at the soles of their feet if they are blotchy circulation is leaving the body it won't be long.
Thank you for sharing your story, Ella 💛
Thank you for sharing and I send my deepest condolences.
Can u pls tell a bit more??
My grandmother is unable to control her urination and stool
She is 99
Her both legs r swollen along with ankles
She urinates and poops in bed too
And right now the situation has gone so worse that she either sleeps with eyes open (may be due to medicines) or she sits bcoz she has urinated Or pooped
She was mumbling something about
my aunty multiple times last night
When she wakes up and asks us to take her to washroom the poop keeps falling down from her dress all over the floor
I can't get what is happening???
Pls tell if d end is near or not?
Thanks for these insights. I witnessed all you're highlighting when my mother passed in 2020. It makes me knowledgeable.
💛💛
When my mom was dying, for the last 9-10 hours before she died, she could not close her eyes nor could she blink. She would just turn her eyes towards us to briefly look at us or she would stare straight ahead. The nurse told me that she had lost her muscle abilities to close her eyes and to blink. Even though she was conscious, she was no longer responding to us like before by nodding or shaking her head whenever we would ask her something. It was as if she could no longer understand what we were saying or what was going on around her. She would just look around by moving her eyes. Her breathing started to slow down minutes before she died and she died with her eyes open. I miss her so much but she is finally at peace. She lived for 87 years and for her entire 87 years plus 2 months, God gave her the ability to be able to walk without a cane or walker, to eat and bathe by herself, to talk, to see, and to hear well. She had dementia but she could still do everything by herself except remember things. Two and a half months before she died, she got sick with a uterine infection and Covid but got over these and what ended up killing her was sepsis because she somehow got a perforated colon and an abscess and doctors could not control the infection towards the end and she died this month, on April 6, 2023.
Sorry to hear of your loss. Praying for you and your family. My Mother deceased 11-07 - 2022. I was there when she took her last breath. Knowing that’s she’s no longer in pain, gives me peace. however, I still find myself crying a lot .. I miss my mommy 😢😢.
I'm so sorry to hear this 😢. I don't know what to say... Thank you for sharing your sorry, ABCD. 💛😪💫
Sorry for your loss
But she have a life and was good health before she passed away
She is with god now
I'm so sorry😢
Sending lights 🕯️🙏. My grandma passed away May 2023 she was 88 and 4 months and she was the only parent I know in my entire life. Her cause of death was body-organs failure that includes heart,liver, kidney and hypertension but the Drs found it at it's last stage , she was at the hospital for 9 days and it was her first time in hospital because she was not the sicky person.... she would just visit her doctor for checks-up.
Yep have been there and done this many times in my life..................as an ex RN emergency Nurse i dealt with this so many times., adults, teenagers and babies......then I had to go through it personally with the loss of my mother and sister.........
I'm so sorry to hear this. My condolences 💫😥.
Im sure it's not easy to work each and everyday see people dying may the Lord continue giving u more strength to help and assist with comfort to those theyve lost their loved ones May God bless u more and more Doctor
I lost a grandparent to dementia last week and this video helped a lot. Thank you.
I'm so sorry for your loss. My condolences 💫😥. Glad to hear this video was helpful.
@@dr.paulinemoyaert Absolutely ☺
I am a nurse but when my mom died last October 2020, I didn’t recognized these signs, maybe because of being on denial when it comes to family members who are dear to me. Reminiscing on her last few days, i found out that she have had undergone these signs like decrease in appetite, agitation and breathing changes before we took her to the hospital; mottled extremities, and incontinence during her stay in the ICU. 😔
I'm really sorry to hear about the loss of your mother. It must have been a difficult and emotional time for you. Sometimes, circumstances and emotions can make it hard to see things clearly. I'm quite sure I would also miss some of the signs if someone close to me was dying. 💫😥
I lost my beloved husband on February He was sick but got sicker and passed within a day. I miss him so much
I'm so sorry for your loss. My condolences 💫😥.
This video is very helpful. My mother passed in August in the hospital. She had the 1st three signs before she passed. I think about her every day 😢
Praise the LORD if we have him we have nothing to fear
Not once or twice but on three separate occasions the hospital staff told us my father was actively dying. He's home (his own home) and doing well. Do not ever give up hope and P.S.....doctors are wrong A LOT
Thank you very much. We all face the death of our loved ones. The last few days is traumatic for those involved in end of life care. Your video provides comfort in addition to useful information.
Thank you, Zakir 💛
Mum went through this, the agitation was the worst she stripped naked, and curled up the most valuable I've ever seen her, in the end she waited till we had gone and passed away, sometimes it's not good to stay till the end.
I'm so sorry to hear this. My condolences 💫😥.
Alleine ist es leichter loss zu lassen, deshalb warten viele Sterbenden bis das Zimmer leer ist. Mahl eben Kaffee hohlen😂
Ubrigens, nach eine Sekunde fangt ein neues Leben an.
My mom died from Covid on Sept 8 2021 at 4pm. The death rattle was so loud, even louder when she would take a sharp breath in (she was comatose on her last day, so I’m hoping she didn’t feel it). She’d just got off quarantine the day she died so my brother and I got to be there for her… so she would know she wasn’t going to die alone. Somehow. I didn’t know I had Covid back then, and it was the delta variant… and through my not knowing I gave it to her. I live with that guilt every day since. But the damn death rattle… sometimes I have nightmares and I can still hear it as clearly as I could that day. When she passed, after my brother had long since left, I think I stayed for another three hours because I wasn’t ready to let go yet. I hope she’s found dad and they are both doing better than they were here. Sorry for the long response to a couple years old video. Great video as well.
Great education for me. As my mom is 91 and you never know what tomorrow brings. Thanks!
Thank you so much!
This video is actually comforting .
No embarrassment there! You got words out. That's enough. Wonderful pics & selfie. So, so happy for you. And thank you for sharing!!🎉
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My grandmother passed away from cancer back in 2007. The last time I saw her alive she wasn't eating, she had breathing issues, and her extremities were starting to become mottled, and while I didn't know these signs of approaching death back then (I was only 14 at the time) I still somehow knew that she wasn't long for this world. I think she knew it would be the last time she ever saw me as well, because the entire time my dad, grandpa, and I were at the hospital to visit her she didn't take her eyes off me once. She passed away about a week later.
I'm so sorry to hear this. My condolences 💫😥.
@@dr.paulinemoyaert Thank you. My grandfather just joined her last year, they're both finally together again but very much missed by us.
My mother in law passed away 2023 december 16th she was surffring from lekuma (blood cancer) she was in palliatieve care at home,when she was passing she has all symptoms which you describe here ,it's really hard time to lossed loveones wi missed her very much may her soul rest in peace
My dad died few years ago main cause was a Pneumonia in a matter of 6 days we witnessed the detoritation and failure of other body organs one by one on the last day his symptoms were so identical what you just mentioned and i also truly belive he was not in a pain....
I'm so sorry for your loss. My condolences 💫😥.
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TQ the symptoms/patterns explained are accurate, precise in every sequence...i ve observed for almost a month, subsequent to my beloved mom's passing away recently.
Thank you, Swee Yeo. I'm sorry for your loss 😕😪💫.
I'm a police officer and a runner. We participate in 5k and 10k races for fun and exercise. They're also huge social events. All of them are fundraisers for needy causes. We had a Christmas run at a children's-cancer hospital. Santa Claus led the race, and we were his elves. It sounds corny but the weather was perfect. As we looped around the hospital, staff were holding a dozen-young children who were patients. They had the bald heads and were very sick. I will never forget the amazed looks and smiles they provided us. I don't know how much money we raised for them, and I don't know how many are no longer here anymore. But thank you Lord for giving me the opportunity to help. This has changed my life and made me a better person. One 4-year old boy said when they come to take him, he wanted to go in a fire truck. It happened and this was arranged. I'll participate in this yearly run for the rest of my life.
As a retired aide I often had the experience to be with my clients as they passed to the other side.
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My mother who passed away recently, showed most of these symptoms. Was relieved to know that she didn't feel the pain much
I'm so sorry for your loss, Sagori 💫😪
May her rest in peace.
Healthcare Christian fellowships Internationally are training Health workers regardless of position to give Holistic care, i.e the much needed Physical care and Spiritial care.
My dad passed away in April 2023 from prostate cancer that spread to his bones. These symptoms are real and frightening because you know where it's leading to. I was happy to not see him in pain anymore. Cancer is no joke. Death is real and it's coming for all of us.
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My husband passed on Mar 12, 2023. He had all symptoms. I knew them because I volunteered at hospice. Never thought I would bring him home on a Mon and passed on Sun. Prostrate. Bladder and spine. I knew when he wouldn't drink or eat and was agitated Miss him 😢
Hi.
My cousin is aged and from what you have explained, in stage one... eating has become a problem.
We pray God sees him through.
My 94year old mother spent the last 4 months of her life in a Care Home. She had previously lived alone for the last 32 years since dad died. Mother had carers and all the possible interventions to help her manage her stage 6 Alzheimers. She displayed all these signs before her death , just 3 week’s short of her 95 th birthday. We knew she had given up as soon as she entered the Home, but we have no regrets. Mother needed the professional care and support which we as family could no longer provide whilst she lived in her own home. Her death was a blessing and relief for all concerned.
My 93 Mom in law did exhibit some of these signs. However not all. From the time it looked like it might be near her end to the end was 10 days. Died Easter night. 2-3 days before her death she was talkative, quite cognitive. We thought she had turned the corner. Had actually been out for kids Easter egg hunt.
All I ask, is when I die I don't care when. Death in itself does not scare me. I embrace events that defines my humanity. What scares me are long, drawn out expensive, physically debilitating, suffrage. That scares the living hell out of me. I don't want to lose my mind, any more than I already have, lol. I don't want to be in so much pain that morphine doesn't touch the pain. I want to remember my life. I want to preserve my senses. I want to be able to wipe my own ass. I want to be ready and able to say "OK, I've completed my life. I'm good to go and today is a good day to die. Let's roll!!!" That's how I want to die. Otherwise, doc, please help!!!
Oops, I'm not sure if I'll be able to help then! Let's hope that you never need my help! 🤞
Thanks for this Dr. As a palliative RN, this is a much better and simple way to assist healthcare professionals in explaining to family members and patients during EOL.
Thanks, Christine, for taking the time to reply! Your comment really made my day. 🧡
My father passed in Hospice in his apartment in 1989. He couldn’t eat solid food only a liquid diet. He drank some orange juice and joked about it as he could still do it. Then his breathing quickened and slowed and quickened and he was wet with sweat and agitated. The most scary thing was he ignored the two nurses and mom and looked right at me and then he passed the next second still staring at me. He was however never afraid of death. He had lung cancer that went into remission for five years before it came back. And he worked at his business from home before he couldn’t. He apologized for anything he did wrong when it came to me and told me he loved me. That’s all he left me. That’s all I cared about. Seeing him pass was traumatic. Sometimes I’m glad I was there other times not. My brother and his fiancé at the time came later that night. We followed to the hospital and saw him alone in a hospital head turned to me eyes still open. He was only 61. I miss dad so much.
my dad died june 9th. also immediately after eating. i think they get so weak that didestion requires too much energy and it kills them.
@@marting5130 it could be just their time. My condolences on loss of your father. It’s hard to lose a parent let alone see it.
My mother n law went through this with her father. He died at home on hospice. He was 87 years old. He lived a good life. I would call 87 years old a long life. ❤
my grandmother passed right before Christmas last year. She went through 2 or 3 "rallies" where it she became more active and very responsive, almost like her old normal self after a month or so of slowing down before hand..I miss her dearly :C
I'm so sorry for your loss. My condolences 💫😥.
That happens too, in some cases. Energy would elevate, mood will show signs of noticeable improvement and such...
I find this Content extremely helpful in the natural process of dying. My mother trusts in God and has complete peace about dying but the family wanted to know what is the natural processes and this was extremely helpful. She’s involved with hospice and it helped me also to know to let her own appetite be her guide, and not to force her to eat. This video explained why that is. Thank you for the help for work you did in providing this video.
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Let a person die in Peace comfort them and pray for them
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My Mother has cancer that she refused to address. and a broken hip (3rd time) which it was not fixed because she wouldn't be able to handle. She had skin cancer at different times which they took half of her ear and about 2 inches on her forehead. She had kidney cancer which they took one of them. She has had cancer on her leg which she refused to do anything with. It grows out if her leg and they have to remove what they can to eliminate the odor. She is now in the final stage if Alzheimer's. She is such a sweet and amazing person who has gone through so much in her life. We will surely miss her.
I remember 1 month before my father died he was already in bed. He had liver cancer. He smelled the grilled cheese sandwich I was making and he requested me to make him some as this was our favorite munchies. He had two bites of it. It was his last solid food intake before he passed.
Just lost my grandmother 9/5/2024 💔 thankful to know this information ❤️
Wow! This was really helpful for me. Thank you for sharing
Glad it was helpful! 💛
This is the best description of end of life Thank you
My father died yesterday in hospital. He was asleep for 5 days. His breathing was shallower each day. I miss him so much
The topic about death unites us all. You must stay strong in front of this painful loss of your father. All we can do is pray for them and surround yourself with your best friends.
@@michaelfishman7174 thanks my mum died of cancer 5 weeks later
What a wonderful concise explaination! Thank you for this video.
Thank you Dr. Now I understand what my Mum was going though as She was in the stages of dying . Wish I had known then. I Thank you very much. I will attach these signs in my Trust for my children to understand. I am greatly indebted to you ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐🎖🏆⚘❤
You're very welcome 💛
Thank you doctor..l experienced all those signs when my husband was nearing death
I'm so sorry to hear this, Ellen. My condolences. 💫💛
In my experience, some people perk up the day or do before death. The lady I was staying with had a stroke and couldn’t speak or walk. The day before she passed, she was actually speaking to me. First words I’d heard her say.
That's exactly what my mother told me. The human body seems so interesting. Just that, she spoke about days and a couple of weeks of perking up before death. Thank you
@@ranjittyagi9354 You’re welcome
Nice to see a more realistic and scientific explanation rather than the nonsensical stories of NDE's and an afterlife
Thank you, Chirpy 😊
I have had two near death experiences. One scary: one not.
The not scary one I was given the choice not to die.
@@judyhansel8000 The brain is a marvelous thing and we still don't fully understand it.
@@chirpywiggins5796 hi! Bad nde
End of alcoholism: Floor under bed turned into a black pit under bed.
Knew I was about to fall into it.
Good NDE; Had been in coma after surgery 6 days. A few weeks later, at home, a golden picture frame appeared in front of me. The picture was of rolling green lands with beautiful music. The frame grew bigger and bigger until I could have stepped into the picture. I said No. I want to finish what I am involved in.
The golden frame disappeared.
I don't know why I'm watching this video. My grandma died from cancer back in November, and I wasn't able to be with her. I don't regret seeing her last moments very ill- as a few months prior to her passing, she was much stronger and I had happier memories
This video makes me sad and miss her. She was like my mom, she raised me and I wish that my baby could've met her in time.
I gave my baby, my grandma's name as her middle name in her memory
I'm so sorry for your loss. My condolences 💫😥.
My husband died on February 5th of this year. He had a heart condition and had a pacemaker. His heart started to slow down and the pacemaker took up the slack. When it started only beating 35 to 45 bpm, I knew something was wrong. He slept a lot, and hardly ate, but still went golfing on the last day of his life. He hit a birdie, walked over to the golf cart, sat down, and closed his eyes. That's when he died. Around 10:00 in the morning. The hospital called me and told me that he had passed away. I knew that when I kissed him goodbye that I should have hugged him harder.
I am so sorry for your loss. Losing a loved one is never easy, and the pain can be overwhelming. I can only imagine the shock and heartache you must be feeling right now. My thoughts and condolences are with you during this difficult time. 💛😪💫
Dying on the golf course! He was happy.
Wow
Thank you for this!
My Dad has Alzheimer’s and has been immobile since July 2022 and confined to bed since December 2022, he has a very weak heart too , he is at home on hospice being cared for by me. His mottling comes and goes, he has constant sleep apnea and will stop breathing for 90+ seconds each time and is doubly incontinent. The curious thing is that he doesn’t want to eat but if finger food is in front of him he will sometimes eat some. He cannot tell if he is uncomfortable, in pain, hungry, thirsty, etc, so these end of life guides are confusing as Dad, when he does wake can’t cognitively identify his needs or desires. 🤷♀️ Our local hospice has been absolutely useless so we are just living and enjoying each day as it comes.
When my Mum (with dementia and COPD) died in hospital she was agitated for a day and a half then slept two days before passing … no mottling or death rattle but she wasn’t given food or fluids.
You're very welcome, Jo. I am so sorry to hear about your dad's condition. It sounds like you are doing an incredible job taking care of him and ensuring that he is comfortable and well-cared for 💛. Are you and your family caring for him since July 2022? Does he get artificial nutrition (He has to eat something, no? Especially since it doesn't seem he is in the final phase of life - yet)
I wish I could do something to help, sending you and your family all my empathy and support.
Hi Dr Paulien,
Thanks for producing this very informative video.
My dad had dementia, bedridden, on NG tube feeding, all the time sleeping, very rarely opens eyes for a minute or two, then closed again, never spoke or respond, in this status for 2 years.. There were 2 people posted 24×7 to assist him with feeding, changing positions, sponge bathing, physiotherapy etc.. Over this period he used to often develop bed sores, UTI, Aspiration pneumonia, and we used to treat promptly with a lot of medications, antibiotics, etc.. Gradually his fingers and hands became stiffened and hyper flexed and stayed like that.
We were falsely believing that he will come out of this condition gradually one day and sincerely caring though we realise that he's suffering immensely by this bed ridden status for years. My query is, would he have felt all this discomfort in his body... being bedridden, unable to move himself, unable to do anything, aspirating while eating, pain due to bed sores, and from this status..
If he would have felt all this as a constant suffering, what we should have done differently..
If he would not have felt any of this, that would be a relief, but how could we explain it scientifically.. Thank you
Not sure from which country you are writing from but I would think your Father's doctors would have advised a legal painless ending of your Dad's life if there
was no hope of recovering. I can't stress enough to have this understood and wriiten out as end of life directives by all of us ,when we are well ,just for the families that caregive and their doctor's own peace of mind.
It is a sad process to go through ,I was told right away after so many tests that my wife would die soon ,the Drs.also stated I could have her
on a feeding tube( as she could no longer swallow ,she was comatose) where she could live for many months but would eventually die from infection .
After catastrophic injuries from a car accident, I was sent to nursing homes. My hearing is just fine. In the nursing homes, I had to hear death rattles of other patients on three occassions. While I commiserate with the families and their dying loved ones, it became almost too much for me,... hearing this repeatedly, and there being nothing I could do to be of any help.
That would freak me out too. Sorry you had to go through that.
It’s good to know and prepare yourself for it and other people in family
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Thank you very much Doctor, exceptional content right there, God bless you