(finally) talking abt my experiences w kalvin garrah
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- Опубликовано: 3 ноя 2020
- brennen beckwith's video:
• Breaking My Silence On...
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i like how Kalvin is 'reclaiming' the slur by continuing to use it as a slur
TRUE
how else.. do you.. reclaim a slur..
@@du5tfing3r he still uses the r slur against other people. reclaiming it or not, that’s not okay
@@du5tfing3r he still uses slurs as a way to offend people. instead of just using it for himself, he uses it in a way to try to bring people down (the way that slurs originated).
@@du5tfing3r by not using it in a negative way.
i hate the voice thing because it’s so so obviously something kalvin is insecure about. *his* voice is kinda high and there is nothing wrong with that! he’s messed up for projecting his insecurities onto our entire community, both propagating and normalizing a way to harass and degrade trans men over things we largely can’t change
I'm thinking that him pointing it out could even harm some of his own audience. For some trans people their voice is part of their dysphoria and its not something anyone can really control.
i think his voice is less so high, and more so the way he speaks makes it sound high? hes kinda got a "gay accent" ngl, *but* im from the same state as kalvin and i sound kinda similar so it might be a state accent thing tbh
@@thecardssystem4742 yeah he just gets really excited so it goes up but it definitely has a male timbre, he still shouldn’t be like insulting other peoples voices tho
As much as I hate Kalvin and all he stands for his voice is kinda voice goals tbh
(I never thought I would ever compliment anything about Kalvin Garrah but here we are)
@@thecardssystem4742 PLS GAY ACCENT SENT ME OMG shotout to the ppl from gay country i got yalls accent too
imo it's not okay for someone to "reclaim" a slur if that person primarily uses it to disparage and insult other people of that marginalized identity.
I agree. I see reclaiming as using it for yourself and maybe close friends if they’re comfortable, but in regard to the T slur, using it against strangers on the internet makes anyone, cis or trans, look extremely transphobic and hateful.
It’s honestly like all the Hispanic kids where I live using the “n-word” because they’re not white, even though the slur was not used against them specifically.
It isn’t the place of anyone to reclaim something that wasn’t used against them or people like them- if a slur is used against trans women, we trans men cannot reclaim it because it isn’t OURS to reclaim.
yeah if someone is using a slur to disparage people then that’s literally not reclamation regardless of their identity
@@peachsoda8701 Agreed. I do the same- I once made a drawing of me holding a cake that said "I'm a f*g AND a tr**ny!" but that was a complete joke and I'd never call someone that.
@@donttouchb00uwo82 i agree w not using a slur towards other people, but trans guys get called trannies a lot of times? It's alright for us to reclaim it
i hate how kalvin separates trans men from cis men so much to the point where if you’re a trans man with a personality, you’re a “trender”
Kevin Gallah: imagine thinking being trans isn't a personality
and he's probably the kind of person who complains about people who "make being trans their entire personality" 🙄
But there is a clear obvious difference between trans men and cis men. that's why trans men transition (usually), and cis men don't. there's a reason for that, lol. don't act like biology doesn't exist. and I'm a trans man myself so.. ya.
@@pencilCasey000 While you are right on a biological point of view, it wasn't the point they tried to make
@@pencilCasey000 but that's not what they're talking about..?
“Kalvins style is boring and I think I look way cooler than him” spitting facts
He dresses like a straggot- full on joke, but its funny how boring he is. C'mon man, if you're trying to tell me how to be as a trans man while in a hoodie and basketball shorts and I'm in punk/goth makeup and platform shoes you have no right.
@@chillfactory9000 😻the style you have>
@@mewmew6158 hell yeah
@@chillfactory9000 probably because he's straight
He has the personality of a pistachio shell
Why is everyone bullied by Kalvin so much more articulate and mature than him? Because people who are mentally/emotionally immature are the bullies.
@Mical Sheradin Nine months too late. Bye.
Kalvin is a PRE LAW STUDENT. I would NEVER want him as my lawyer with all of the assumptions he makes.
i'm imagining his future employers searching 'kalvin garrah' and coming across... well... everything.
that's the thing, given what he does online, he would not make a good lawyer because his logic isn't sound. the vast majority of his fans blindly support him which is not something that would happen in any court case.
@@lotsofteabutnonetodrink5843 He wouldn't be a good lawyer but he has _exactly_ the profile of one... Lawyers can (emphasis on CAN) be the worst scum out there honestly.
imagime him going into court with those ugly ass straightie clothes 😭😭
@@miea34 imagine judging people on their clothes while you’re dressed as a rainbow clown
Not to mention that Kalvin's ideas on gender are,, very colonialist and honestly kind of racist. Indigenous people do not have the same trans experience as white trans people. Prior to colonization, indigenous people had very different ideas on gender and gender expression, I'm indigenous mexican, Nahua and Chichimeca Jonaz to be specific, the men of my tribes and pueblos and the men of the surrounding tribes and pueblos did not express themselves as men in the same way that european men do. They didn't care, and neither did the women or the other people of these cultures. We didn't associate clothing with gender. I mean, the Nahua(who came after the Aztec Empire dissolved) even have a god who is referred to as male but who sovereigns and looks over things that europeans would see as 'feminine'. Gender expression, and gender itself, wasn't seen by indigenous people the same way that it was by european people. And a lot of these ideas on gender were actually FORCED on indigenous people by colonizers. It was something FORCED on our ancestors to make them assimilate. For indigenous people, identifying as trans or being gender-non-conforming isnt just a way of expressing ourselves, but it's an act of defiance against colonialist ideals on gender, it's a way of defying those who tried to kill us off en masse and it's a way of showing that no matter how hard colonizers tried to force us to assimilate, we're still here and they weren't successful in destroying our cultures. Kalvin trying to force HIS very european and colonial views on gender isn't just shitty and mean and terrible, but it's also racist. And indigenous people arent the only people of color who experience/express gender differently, several other cultures of color do, I am just only speaking on the indigenous trans experience because I myself am an indigenous trans man.
yes!!! thank you so much for sharing this, I talk a bit in this video abt how transmedicalism is deeply tied to racism, and colonialism is absolutely a huge aspect of that. colonialism/neocolonialism is still everpresent in ideas of gender and i very much appreciate you sharing your personal and cultural experiences with that 💜
@@anabella4166 no . They can speak up about this
@@anabella4166 shut up
This comment is beautiful.
@@anabella4166 methinks you’re not indigenous and can’t say shit abt this topic.
I always think about how hypocritical he is, like is he gonna walk up to a butch cis woman and tell her she’s not valid because she’s not “feminine” enough? Or tell a fem cis man he’s not valid either? No he wouldn’t, so why does he think it’s ok to do it to gnc trans people? He really needs to get over himself.
you mean "i'm not like other girls" girls are trans?
@@kaiyodei I’m not sure what you’re trying to say?
@@kaiyodei the op is talking about the fact that gnc cis people aren't criticized by kalvin for not ascribing to gender norms but gnc trans people are, which is a double standard.
@@kaiyodei it's the literal opposite, OP is saying "if 'not like other girls' girls aren't trans just cause they wanna be a different type of woman, why are trans people who don't match this incredibly specific gender stereotype not trans?"
not feminine enough like looking like Mr. Universe and who has toxic masculinity dispite being a chick?
The only reason I ever liked kalvin was because I was a desperate baby trans who just wanted validation. I think a lot of his viewers are similar. And because trans medicalism is more “cis-friendly” it gets more attraction which makes it more likely to be the first trans thing a trans person sees. I wish more people like you were popular because you are the type of person baby trans people need, not kalvin.
yea i feel like a lot of his audience is insecure 14 year old trans guys
@@praalgraf that was me when i first found him my views have changed i am now 16
I remember first finding his channel when I was trying to listen to more trans voices because I was uneducated(tm). I'm so glad that I thought he was an asshole and stopped paying him attention because transmedicalism seems like one hell of a thing to un-learn
I just watch his vids for entertainment, because I think he’s funny. I don’t agree with everything he says, but I see him and sometimes I laugh with him, other times at him. I might be truscum?
I believe gender dysphoria/euphoria should be a prerequisite to insurance-paid transition. If you lack gender dysphoria, the need to transition is not there, and so it should be paid for out of pocket.
I don’t like when those lacking in gender dysphoria speak over those who do in conversations about difficulty in being transgender, assuming the desire to transition is lacking entirely in the person without dysphoria.
I believe non-binary people are valid, though I can’t relate to those who change absolutely nothing about themselves and don’t enforce their pronouns. Then it makes me question, but I still use pronouns of their choice/respect them. I met a non-binary person who looked androgynous af, and some who clearly have not tried or done anything or change their pronouns. Doesn’t make sense to me, but, again, I use their pronouns.
I also believe trans men should be allowed to say the T-slur to refer to themselves (same with trans women), but not others (unless they’re okay with that). I call myself the t and f slur sometimes, since that’s what I am.
Mind you, I’m a 19 y/o trans guy.
@@user-sf9gs2pg1b
One thing I like to say is I don't think trans people without dysphoria are completely immune to the discrimination they get from being trans. Like regardless of having dysphoria or euphoria or not we all still have to deal with the people who are unaccepting.
Transmeds: you’re not trans if you don’t have medical intervention!
People: * receive medical intervention *
Transmeds: how dare you take our medical care away from us!
Yes!
I don't think that's the problem. It's more about whether you have dysphoria or not, (if you're suffering or not, if hormones will posetively affect your well being or not). No trans person is saying you can't be trans if you aren't on hormones lol
@@optforthyname3800 no that’s actually exactly what transmeds are saying
@@bathtimedilara No, they're saying you aren't trans if you have the possibility to take hormones and get surgery, but pass on the oppertunity. That's not the same thing.
@@bathtimedilara HOWEVER,,
They might actually refer to transexual folks, which are trans people who have medically transitioned. In that case they would be right. But for transgender people, that wouldn't be the correct definition.
I''m 56 and non binary... you are fine. He has the maturity of a child. Unfortunately, he is deluded by his own false sense of knowledge. He is only a young adult with no knowledge. Children have more emotional intelligence. I wish you would not get so upset by his comments. I'm not trying to invalidate or minimize how you feel. I just wish for us all to be beyond being affected by ingnorant people and their ignorant attitudes. I like your content and just keep talking your truth with compassion and intelligence.
Oh gosh, it means the world to me to hear about older non-binary people. You are a blessing and I hope you continue to enjoy yourself and inspire those around you 💕💕
@@micahmosse3876 Yeah, it’s comforting to see older trans and non binary people in particular. I haven’t figured it all out yet, but this makes me feel like it’s going to be okay. I’ll make it, wherever my journey in figuring out my gender and sexuality takes me. Thank you for existing. You are important. 💛
I'm a gendefluid teen, so the fact that there's a 56 year old nb out there made my day. Thank you, I'm proud of you
you just make my day - it’s so validating to hear that there is older nonbinary people, it shows just how big our community is! i feel very isolated because i’m nonbinary and it’s so nice to see people like you. :)
💯
I started out identifying as a cis lesbian with a strange interest in trans people who avidly watched Kalvin's videos, probably cuz I was insecure in my own identity. That's actually how I found ur channel. I don't think I left any hateful comments, but if I did, I'm so sincerely sorry. Now, I am non-binary and disagree with everything Kalvin stands for. Your videos have helped me understand why the trans-med ideology is so harmful. Thanks so much for speaking out about your experience with this.
Hi former Kalvin supporter here, the "cis king" thing is a joke. It has nothing to do with passing it at all. If I had to say, it mainly had to do with his trans haters calling him a cis apologist so people just started jokingly calling him cis king. :)
Precisely the same as me
the worst part is trans-med isn't even bad in and of itself for the most part, it's people like Kalvin making it into something it's not. not everyone shares the same dysphoria and making it seem like your experience needs to be one specific thing in order to be valid is awful. i really hope Kalvin realises that he's hurt so many people and becomes better
Exactly the same here ): I now go as She/they and I’ve never been more confident in my identity.
Hey, uh, I'm a tad bit confused. I used to watch a tad bit of Kalvin Garrah and Blaire White a long while ago but fell off, and am just hearing about them through all of this. What happened? Can someone please explain?
yoo im loving this new wave of people finally speaking up against kalvin
Yes and Blaire White 🤢
Both of them are literally the thing they hate
Kalvin Garrah and Blair white "I hate transphobes"
Both of them: **continue to be transphobic**
I remember watching a video a long time ago where he said to storm Ryan that he hates trans people. After seeing that I was kinda just like “that’s a little weird, but he’s trans he knows more than I do”
@@amaya4551 are you joking? 🤢
@@fancyspaggy me to kalvin and blaire: you have become the very thing you swore to destroy
The slur thing has always seemed kinda weird to me. Like, I can get reclaiming a slur directed at your community. But I feel it's an entirely different thing to reclaim a slur, only to use that slur to take jabs at other people who are part of that group. It's just kinda messed up to me.
yeah I really agree with that like using it to talk about yourself to reclaim it is fine but using it on other people you don't even know? kinda messed up idk
Yeah as others have said that’s not reclaiming a slur that’s reusing it lmao. Like ok calling himself that? Reclaiming it I guess. Calling others that without their consent in order to bully them and specifically weaponize the word in the way it was originally intended? That’s just hurling around slurs.
As a fat person, the fat phobia in the transmed community is absolutely disgusting. Kalvin and other transmedicalists so often tell people they "have their boobs out" or whatever but for people like me (i believe I have a d cup or something similar) it ALWAYS looks like I have my boobs out, even in a binder. Binders do like nothing for me and I'm sure that's the case for many trans people. I, sadly, used to be a transmedicalist. I hated myself and I hated others for being different than me. I was so insecure about my own identity and self expression that I had to be jealous and hateful of other trans peoples happiness. Luckily I've changed since then. Your videos actually really helped me with self discovery, I watched your video about trendersonas and although I wasnt a transmed anymore when I watched it I still wasnt like involved in that side of the community because of internalized judgments and transphobia. Watching that video and seeing how you identify as a non binary man made me think "man I wish I could use he/they pronouns thats cool" and then I was like "i can??? Who's stopping me??" Its sad that I never gave myself the opportunity to consider myself being anything except a binary trans man because of transmedicalism. Thank you for speaking out, your channel is really sick and watching your videos helped me grow as a person :•) I hope you have a good day ashton!
I had a DD / E cup before T and a binder made me flat. Something is likely wrong with the sizing if your binders are not doing anything.
The other thing is, what about people who want to get surgery for that kind of thing? There’s always a before, where you still have that stuff that makes you the gender you don’t want to identify with. It’s almost like he completely disregards the fact that you looked a different way before taking steps like surgery to transition (ofc if u choose to get surgery; you don’t need to but I hope you get what I mean)
I have a J cup,,, binders very much don't work for me :-: I can't wait till i can afford surgery
I have an H cup and it s u c k s
@@Anonymous-54545 my sizing isnt wrong I measured myself. They just dont work for me and make me look like I have a unaboob lmao
not to comment again but kalvin is ridiculous, your voice is so? normal? and very deep and calm and nice to listen to. not that you even need any outside confirmation, if you like your voice who gives a shit!
legit I have to eq out some bass on my speakers whenever I watch one of ashton's videos because their voice is super resonant in the low end.
sidenote: petition for ashton to do overtone singing. idk I think it would be neat
@@declanacton1359 oh hell yeah! that’d be awesome
His voice is deeper than Kalvins wtf
@@ashtons8626 It's not about pitch, it's about timbre, more accurately. Although, tbh, it doesn't matter whether Ashton's voice is deep or not. It's just not cool to make fun of someone for something relatively out of their control.
Kalvin: I am going to create an environment that is SO TOXIC
lollll
my main 'issue' with kalvin (not rly an issue, esp in comparison to like. his abuse of his platform and views) is like,,, why does he care abt what other trans ppl do with their lives?
I think the way approaches it seems indirectly affect others as well
Its profitable $$$$ lots of transphobes have money
He doesn't want you to mess your life up by making a mistake.
The end.
@@jacobvalinetine8881 it’s also ✨not his business ✨
@@jacobvalinetine8881 its not his business you freaks
Kalvin truly believes he is the arbiter of trans people. "You have a flower in your garden? That would give me dysphoria henceforth you have been charged with the crime of trender" most of the things he says speak more to his insecurity than it does to other people not being trans enough
I agree, he's so insecure in his own masculinity he just can't accept that other trans people are more confident and can dress and do whatever they want without feeling they're invalid.
Kalvin is very aware of how his followers behave. But he likes to say “I never told anyone to do that “ but with a little more nuanced thought, he would realize that you don’t have to specifically tell someone to abuse someone, you just have to create a culture where it’s permissible and even cool.
Yes I agree, he's unable to take responsibility for consequences his videos bring. And I do think he's responsible for the actions of his followers, he's guiding them.
A lot of cis gay guys have "the t voice" just because it's about whether or not you talk from your chest or your throat. Anyone with the t voice can just change it with voice therapy, it's not a side effect of being on t. I hate how Kalvin is pushing this idea of it being caused by going on testosterone because when I first saw the video it made me really scared about starting t and getting this "invalid" voice, and I'm sure other transmasc individuals watching it felt the same.
I kinda do think his following being horrible to trans people is his responsibility. After all he's creating an environment where hate grows and hateful people feel comfortable and empowered to abuse people
His community is the fault of Google. Google should be sued for the damage they've caused.
@@cathrynm what
@@emstert8665 Google hosted his videos. If someone is harrassed by this, google should be at least partly responsible.
@@cathrynm if you mean that google should deplatform him and other hateful people then I agree. As far as I’m concerned, his hateful content directed at individuals breaks the RUclips rules. So I agree with your point. He shouldn’t be rewarded for hate and should be deplatformed by google. Thankfully RUclips is starting to get more serious about harassment by their creators toward other creators, so hopefully there will be less of this sort of hate in future.
@@cathrynm I like watching kalvin
I'm not a speech specialist or anything of the like, neither am I an endocrinologist, but I'm like 99.9% sure that the 'T voice" has nothing to do with hormones (other than the deepening part ofc).
I truly believe that it is the result of being socialized as femme for many years (before coming out), meaning that individual will likely still possess more 'feminine' talking manners (by this I mean like the placement of one's voice in their throat and pronunciations of certain sounds). I also think that who you grew up socializing with plays a part; for example, if you have more men or women in the family/were friends with, who your role models are/were, etc.
Mind you, this can definitely be changed if you decided to actively do so. Many trans-feminine people work on voice training, but unfortunately, this is much more difficult for them, as feminizing hormones (should they choose to go on them) do not grant the same vocal changes that masculinizing hormones do.
There's a short doc by The New York Times called "Who Sounds Gay?" that covers this a little.
YEP all of that definitely factors into it !! at the end of the day so many things play into what someone’s voice sounds like and hormones and even socialization impact so many ppl in different ways, it’s irresponsible and outright incorrect of him to attribute the t--voice to simply like.. the wrong testosterone dosage
I used to watch kalvin and others who make similar content and I recently realized that one of the major things I was doing when watching him was trying to convince myself I wasn't non-binary. Like I was ingraining the idea that being non-binary is disrespectful or disregarding binary trans people into my head. I'm honestly so proud of myself for like accepting myself as non-binary And I'm really happy but I think a lot of my internalized transphobia and such definitely came from watching kalvin.
keep being yourself !!
I did the same thing, kind of told myself if I can't be comfortable as a man I don't deserve to be trans. I actually went on like, Amino or something and asked for advice on how to accept myself as a girl and stop being a trender. Well, I'm still trans and still nonbinary so that didn't work out. Love to see nonbinary people be proud of who they are, kudos to you for being yourself.
Same😔
i did the EXACT same thing. i actually came out as genderfluid three-ish years ago, but it didn’t go as i wanted and i ended up pushing myself back into the closet and constantly watching kalvin garrah “cringe” reaction videos as a form of psychological self-harm that allowed me to contain repressing by non-binary identity. i only recently ditched transmed influencers and started to embrace my real gender
X400000
It’s strange how trans people can’t do the same things cis people can do by his standards. He wouldn’t bat an eye if a cis guy wore a maid dress but if they’re trans, suddenly Kalvin decides that you’re fake.
Chokers being evocative of a daddy kink?? That’s so weird?? Like since when?? It’s just a normal fashion item especially in the more goth side of fashion
I had a choker on at school once and a teacher asked me if I have a s3x kink. I was almost 10 at that time and it was just made out of rainbow loom
@@Bumbllee ugh! That’s disgusting and totally unacceptable! I hope you told someone about that like the administration or the office
I mean we can’t expect a dude who wears thrasher hoodies and streetwear lite stuff to know about what fashion is
As a younger enby person who really looks up to you, it’s really nice to know that you care about your audience like that, usually people kinda throw us younger teens to the side but you don’t and it’s really nice :))
Yeah and as a older trans person i agree
As another younger teen enby, I completely agree :3
I think i might be enby masculine because I’ve never felt like any gender since I could talk. I was supposed to be on T at the age of 12 or 13 but when I watched videos like Kalvins I felt like I wasn’t legible and thought what I felt wasn’t real so I tried to identify as female and forgot about my identity. It made me depressed and I was attempting suicide and harming myself because I felt so lost. I dressed feminine to try to feel happier but I always ended up still feeling like I was nothing. It got to a point where I couldn’t take it anymore so I came out later as a trans man because he made me think there was no way I could feel like not having a gender. When I backed away from his platform I found out although I liked looking like a boy, I still like feminine things but my gender identity is always going to be neither male nor female.
Just because you’re a trans man and you like feminine things like makeup or dresses or heels or skirts, it doesn’t make you female. You just have a feminine gender expression. Same if you’re a trans woman who doesn’t mind having a chest or still likes to dress in masculine clothing and likes “masculine activities” that doesn’t make you a man.
I can like whatever I like and no matter what I wear or what I do, I’m always going to be neither. Anyways it’s been six years, and I finally started T. I’ve talked to a therapist and am going to talk to another therapist so that things turn out like how they are supposed to.
I don’t know how long I plan to be on T or how it’ll make me feel since my dose is extremely low so I have not seen changes yet. But I know that I’m taking the right path.
I just wanted to share this.
Homie hates it when trans folk don't try to assimilate and yet he named himself Kalvin with a K
I shouldn't be dunking on him, he's like 75% projected insecurity by weight, it'll only make things worse
I still remember watching one of his videos he did on Ash Hardell, reacting to one of their videos talking about their gender identity and troubles with disordered eating, where he called them a 'fat d*ke' I still cannot get that out of my mind and how negatively it affected me, even though it wasn't directed at me, as a afab person with an ed that really hurt me, still does
I started this year as a transmedicalist thanks to people like Kalvin and Blaire White. Now I am a non binary woman.
non binary woman ???
@Monika
They are a female aligned nonbinary person. A nonbinary woman is an enby who identifies with womanhood.
@@kallamarsspouse oh😱😱
This is seriously me right now. Was a fan of Blaire and Kalvin at the start of the year, and now I’ve realized that I was attracted to their channels because of my own self-hatred for my personal gender confusion. I’ve considered that I was non-binary years ago (but the hatred channels like theirs put out set the realization of my gender back a few years), but am only coming to accepting this now. So congrats to you, and anybody else in the same position!
You are so awesome! Everything you are saying is so TRUE. I'm so glad I could inspire more people to tell their stories and promote a more inclusive trans message. Thank you so much for doing this good work. I'm proud of you, and I am with you.
also I love your hair
hi brennen!! you're awesome
love your stuff :)
Hi Brennen :D
You single handidly yanked me out of my kalvin stan phase and ive been so mutch less self-hating since. I didn't see myself in the furure until i saw your videos. Thank you. Also the ableism in the trans community video sounds really good.
that means a lot, thank you !! but give yourself credit too, you've grown a lot and i'm really glad you're in a happier, less-self-hating place today
is that about how things like felisgender are not valid? why is it when anyone else says the'll be a cat is transphobic, but as soon as someone with a special brain says they are like a cat suddenly "well I am sure people in Uruk had felisgender"
@@kaiyodei why do you care so much, it doesnt affect you
I feel like Ashton is a little lenient with Kalvin and his audience (completely understandable by the way, I don't blame Ashton for doing that). What I mean is that it's Kalvin's responsibility to cultivate his audience and the audience he cultivated has sent sui-bait to trans people they don't like because Kalvin doesn't like them. Sending fatphobia, slurs, and putting other people under the microscope is what Kalvin does and his audience follows suit because of that. It is an online creator's responsibility to avoid that and if they can't, they either shouldn't post content or they should heavily censor credit to avoid people doing what they did to Ashton.
Anyway, I admire Ashton's grit. They're really dedicated to his audience and I appreciate that he's made this video.
does kalvin know that he's not actually reclaiming the T-slur if he uses it with the purpose of being a slur?
I'm sure he does, if not he's on a whole different planet
I wondered if more people would come forward and speak up about kalvin garrah and how he treats people/how his fanbase treats people.
Ive been upset by his actions for a long time and I Think that some parts of his community are just young trans people that are desperate for validation and feel like this is the best way, without realizing that it may harm themselves and others.
I once took pride in passing as a cishet guy, just because it meant people would respect me, when they actually respected a Version of me that does not exist.
Kalvin seems to have a lot of anger and hurt over how difficult it is to be trans and instead of blaming this transphobic society he lashes out and hurts other trans people. He also lacks empathy and basic respect.
Calvin says so so so much vile stuff about trans people who aren't trans in the way he is but how incredibly cruel do you have to be to post pictures of REAL people and say that you are scared of surgery because you may end up looking like them, knowing full well how sensitive this topic is, ESPECIALLY for trans people.
It really blows my mind how he can run an entire channel centered around making fun of people, in most cases teenagers, who have a much, much smaller platform than he does, being well aware how awful his following is to them and believe just for a second that what he does is helping ANYONE in the trans community. He doesn't spread awareness, he doesn't empower or uplift anyone. Literally the only thing he does is bullying GNC and nb/gq trans people back into the closet and make cis people feel like they are allowed to do the same.
The way he attacks people is very telling. Rather than dealing with his own insecurities and working through his fears, he spews hate on others. In addition to it being harmful abuse, it is pathetic and childish behaviour.
I watched Brennan's video on this topic and Im so glad I saw you post your own video. Youre right that transmedicalism is rooted in racism and abliesm, but it's also rooted in colonialism and white supremacy. Trans people have existed throughout centuries in nearly all cultures, when did any indigenous trans person need a doctors note to prove they were trans/gender variant? Thank you for posting though, I've been watching you as a fellow enby transman who's also a leftist and a punk, and your videos are so gender euphoria. You and Brennan did a wonderful job of describing the harm kevin garbage has done to you, and I sincerely hope more people realize the harm his community and his rhetoric is causing. Hope you're well and take care of yourself Ashton! 💖
also just wanted to add that i LOVE your chest!! I used to be so afraid of complications for top surgery, but seeing how you loved your chest regardless of how "odd" it looks made me realize that my chest will always be my own, and there is nothing wrong with that, regardless of how it looks like.
because they had 6 genders, and not "some women have penises, just like some women are short or albino"
@@kaiyodei huh??
@@kaiyodei the fuck you tryna say
Certain parts of my country are said to formerly have a 3rd gender, much before colonial Spain came over, gave us Catholicism and revised how we interpret gender. Gender was mainly based on a persons role in society instead of their sex. As such we had a third gender, primarily made up of transwomen (since women were considered holier than men) who have a very spiritual role of priestess (thats technically what it was), and they acted like women, could have male lovers and were said to even raise children. These transwomen were socially treated as females and recognized as such. This was long before any type of advanced sex change surgery, so one might say that these people were y'know ... women with dicks lmao. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Also another cool thing is that we have old mythologies in which softer maidens "turn into men" and become strong warriors.
As someone who’s apart of a minority group it seems strange for him to attack down to even more vulnerable (visible, gnc, enby) people within the community. Then blame the victims for him also being a victim
Kalven is just like Blaire: easy to look at, cis-friendly.
You don't have to do this but Kalvin made a new video justifying his use of the r-word because of his ADHD and Dyslexia. As A Dyslexic person I was disgusted by what Kalvin said and how he tried to justify it. If you are open to it I would love to hear your thoughts as a neurodivergent person.
what's with kalvin and wanting to call people slurs? i'm also dyslexic, and i'm autistic (and trans) and just.. Yikes
he's such a hateful person. hopefully with people talking about their experiences with him, more people will thoroughly realise just how destructive and unreasonable he is. i can't fathom how little one must feel for others, to actively harm so many and not even question themself.
i know i am not ashton, but as someone who is neurodivergent i believe the R slur should never be used by or directed toward anyone. it cannot be reclaimed and even if someone (for whatever reason) would want to use it, they certainly should not use it to refer to anyone other than themself. kalvin is aggressive and selfish. he obviously doesn't care about the wellbeing of people who aren't exactly like him.
he's such a horrible person to be used as a role model, but he obviously depicts himself as one.
sorry my comment is so long, i guess i had a bit to say.
@@evilandmaliciouswarwick I agree. I do not like Kalvin but if he was just stating that disabled people can reclaim the r-word that would be okay but he was trying to justify him using it to refer to other people often people who he knows are autistic. I'm just haven't seen any videos calling Kalvin out for his recent ableism and he seems to think having ADHD means he can't be ablest.
totally agree w you - he repeatedly uses his adhd & dyslexia as excuses for being shitty, esp to autistic people. you’re a million percent right also that even if he wants to reclaim a slur, that doesn’t mean he should push it on others. he seems to do the same thing w the t slur
I saw that video and it pissed me off so much. I’m autistic and dyslexic and I have no desire to use the r slur in any way, shape or form. However if another disabled person wants to use that word to refer to themselves then that’s up to them. The thing is, he isn’t just using the r slur on himself, he is calling other people it. He is being ableist against other neurodiverse peeps and using his dyslexia and adhd as an excuse. Also he made a whole ass video on “autism gender” reacting to a nb Autistic person without doing any research into the fact that a massive amount of autistic people have an alternative gender identity. Although it’s not an “autism gender”, completely denying all correction between gender and neurodivergence is disgusting.
i hate how he says he's "reclaiming" them, and then he just uses them like a slur against other people :/
I absolutely hate how his response has been "I cant be cancelled". We are not trying to cancel kalvin, we are asking him to stop sending waves of harrassment to trans individuals by putting them in videos, misgendering them, making fun of them, insulting them with labels, calling them trenders etc. We are asking him to address the previous videos he has made and since deleted about these trans people where he has mocked and judged them because they experience gender dysphoria differently to him. He has absolutely no right to project his experience onto other trans people and make claims that they are not trans because they Express their trans identity differently to him. He has caused a lot of harm, and it doesnt matter that he claims he doesnt send his fans to harrass these people that he makes videos about because its still what happens every single time, and he knows this and acts like he is not responsible for the influence he has with his platform.
Not quite sure where I’m going with this comment, but bare with me here:
I never truly watched Kalvin, but his mindset and ideology did reach me. That’s why I took so long to accept my gender (something I’m still currently working on). I’m so scared of being labelled as a ‘trender’ just because I don’t fit his limiting expectations of what a trans person should act and look like. I’m still half in denial.
I completely agree with what you said. Even before you look at his beliefs, the way he treats people is inexcusable. He needs to take at least some responsibility for how his words affect people.
Great video, and your makeup looks amazing!
I'm a young, autistic, trans genderqueer, xenogender man, and you help me so much with empowering my identity. Your support towards my community makes me extremely happy, thank you.
I remember when I was questioning my gender and I found his videos. I was confused and felt really off about him. I just kept thinking, "they just experience gender different from you..."
that's an incredibly mature and empathetic viewpoint and i applaud you for that because i wish i'd been the same way, it would have saved me a lot of confusion and repression in the long run lmao, i'm glad there are ppl out there that weren't taken in by kalvin s rhetoric though, it's comforting to know
@@hazyrory3121 i always question things when it comes to invalidating people, it’s just rude so it made me question him.
i swear to god, kalvin is actually going to have a mental breakdown when he finds out that even cis men can have a "gay voice"...
His logic is just so stupid because according to him, its ok for cis men to wear makeup and dresses, but not trans men. Its ok for cis women to have really deep voices, but not for trans women. Its ok for cis people to do whatever they want but if trans people dont all fit into one specific mold, then they are invalid and dont deserve a platform cause they’re “ruining it” for everyone else 🙄 i think him and blaire are very insecure people and because of that, they have to put others down to feel better about themselves.
I've had a fan of kalvins directly mock me for my gender expression, it was in a more groupchat like setting so it was super uncomfortable and Upsetting.
From what I've seen, transmeds seem to lack basic manners, which I guess isn't surprising based on their policing of gender and expression.
I really appreciate that youre explicitly against transmedicalism
But yeah, glad you're back! :)
IMAGINE being trans, PERSONALLY knowing what being trans is like from your own experience. And seeing other trans people who have overcome potential internalized transphobia, built up the courage to come out, and spent years saving up hundreds or THOUSANDS of dollars to pay for therapists/hormones/surgery/whatever. And STILL thinking that's an okay thing to make fun of people for.
I just cannot imagine caring THAT LITTLE about other human beings
i am sure the "i'm not like other girls" know
As someone who used to watch kalvin and internalised some of his views, your existence on the internet means so much to me. I have become way less judgemental of others, and much more accepting of myself since I started watching your videos. I know it might be wierd to say and hard to belive, but a lot of my self growth directly correlates to my discovery of your channel. Thank you for putting stuff online for others to learn from, even tho you get a lot of shit for it, it does mean a lot
This video hit close to home for me, because as a trans guy, I am uncomfortable about what people might think about my voice. It’s gotten deep since T, but I know I have a "traditionally feminine" inflection and style of speaking, so I’m worried about people thinking I have a so-called gay voice. I have a lower voice, and I love it, but it almost gets overshadowed by insecurity about my inflection.
Don't worry, inflection can be worked on, just like trans women can aquire that, trans men can loose it.
But you know, some people (including me) find "gay-voices" adorable and friendly 😊, try to make friends who'll appreciate it as well as your personality.
The t---- voice thing is so idiotic and insulting. I really appreciate you sharing your experience with testosterone and how it effected your voice. You did exactly what Kalvin says you should and ended up with the voice he chooses to label as undesirable. Meanwhile I started on a dose that was too high for me causing my voice to drop extremely fast, exactly what kalvin claims will give you the t---- voice, and I ended up with a very masculine voice. People's bodies just react differently and that's ok. A person's voice doesn't make them any more or less trans.
Also I just want to say that I really like your top surgery results. I'm planning to get top surgery with no nipples so it's really nice and validating to see results with no nipple(s) even if it wasn't done purposefully in your case
hi :) your comment reminded me of jasper jane, who's also done top surgery w/o nipples. i thought you might like their videos too if you haven't seen them yet ^_^ ruclips.net/video/xRV5KXlOOgk/видео.html
It really needs to be talked more how his beliefs are rooted in white supremacy and colonialism. He thinks his experience is the ONLY experience and gender non conforming people are the “bad ones” and it’s very rooted in white supremacy. Indigenous cultures around the world have gender non conforming and other experiences within being trans, him thinking HIS experience is the only right way to be trans is so racist and disgusting. I just don’t think we talk about this aspect enough.
EXACTLY. A lotta truscum ideology is deeply rooted in western culture white supremecy and not enough ppl talk about it!!
Love the hair, i also do it up like that most of the time
me too! Ashton was part of the inspiration for a lot of my hairstyles and I've recently started wearing it like that
@@nualahalpin6119 he was an inspiration for so many style choices for me lmao
When my hair was longer on the top I did too!! Ever since I got a mullet a few months ago I cant but its getting there again!
@@lupineallen5039 i looove mullets
@@janjaki2741 Ugh I know right?.. thats why I had to get one.. at first it was wayyy too short on accident but now that its grown out Im in love w it
I'll be forever grateful that I stumbled upon your channel and not his when I started questioning my gender
for me it was people regurgitating his views in instagram comment sections- it deterred me from coming out for a really long time and just made me feel even more confused bc I always knew I was transmasc but also always knew I wasn't binary. watching your videos and seeing you being so comfortable and confident in your identity, which is pretty similar to mine, really helped me feel validated and genuinely was a big part of why I decided to transition
i'm so glad people are speaking up against kalvin garrah. i used to be one of those young insecure trans people who related to the people he bullied. i questioned myself so much because i didn't think i was dysphoric enough. he's done so much damage to our community and we need to get together and call him out.
Deangelo wallace did a peice on Blair White...in that video he discusses how the transmed rhetoric panders to cis conservatives and how that circle's (kalvin looks up to blair white a lot) audience is mostly cis people and how that harmed how people learn and view transgender in general.
YES I LOVE D'ANGELO!!!
I’m glad that everyone’s talking about it! People like Kalvin really discourage people to experiment and try on new things, labels, etc., to find themselves and who they are.
@Miss Jeanna You’re not LGBT, are you? People don’t always automatically realize they’re trans. It can take months or even years, and multiple different labels to know what fits the best. It took my brother years to realize he’s trans. It also took me years to realize I’m demisexual and bi. Why are you bothered by people trying to figure out who they are? Who are you to tell them it doesn’t matter?
Post transition Kalvin hates himself, doesn't know why and projects it onto others. Anything one says or does to another is a direct reflection of themselves.
@Miss JeannaRespectfully disagree maam. The last line in my comment is 100% true. People that fully love themselves don't treat others in such a disposable manner. He might not hate himself entirely but he does hate some part, deeply and truly.
"he puts the blame on oppressed people rather than the institutions that oppress them" i-
Your tooth necklace is awesome
Those were teeth?!?
Coooooool
thank you!! they are my wisdom teeth >:)
Ashton Daniel that’s so cool...
@@graveyardpansy hooly- that's metal af xD
Hey Ashton I’m so glad you made this video.
CW: digital self harm/suicide ideation
I found kalvin by accident and when I had just come out as nonbinary. It was a time when I was vulnerable and felt like I wasn’t trans enough (which I’m still working through) and when I found his videos they hurt, not just as a trans person who felt like they didn’t belong but also seeing the fat phobia he spread in later videos. It hit very close to home. I got sucked into his stuff (not in a way that I became a trans medicalist, I think was it was just of form digital self harm because it confirmed my deepest fears) through his stuff I found other people with similar ideas and it added further harm. To the point that came very close to suicide because of the rhetoric that had been burned so deep in my brain. That being who I am I hurt other trans people so much more than my existence was worth. It was also tied to how the comments affected my dysphoria and how me being nonbinary was equated to being easier or fake or I was just a woman etc. it was just a horrible tipping point compounded with irl experiences of horrible Dysphoria that I had been experiencing before seeing that video.
however
I was able to reach out to a safe space and got myself further into therapy and met trans friends irl who love me unconditionally for who I am. I’ve also found a community of loving people through a nonbinary musician (Dorian Electra). BUT that does not take away from the severe harm that his rhetoric had on me because that rhetoric rips into some people’s deepest worries and that is especially true for people who have been in his videos unwillingly. I’m still dealing with the effects of having found his content and how his views spread to all platforms and discourse that I seemingly couldn’t escape. But that rhetoric (I’m not directly saying it was his fault just that sort of rhetoric) put me in such a bad place. It isolated me and made me feel like I was taking away from others because of my mere existence.
ALSO on the flip side once i found your channel I was able to start working to move away from that discourse.
i'm really happy you've moved away from that, and hope you continue to find more fulfilling ways to spend your time !
i've definitely seen/heard of many people, esp. nonbinary folks, that have used his content as a form of digital self-harm, and it's really painful i know, but i think it's important to talk about. thank you so much for sharing all of this
@@graveyardpansy yeah I’m so glad I’ve been able to move away from his stuff. It was a very painful and isolating time but I’m working through that and learning to embrace who I am every day more and more 🧡🧡
thank you for speaking out about this !! i think there’s been a bit of a shift in the trans community with more & more people being against transmedicalism and kalvin in specific, but there’s still a lot of people who still continue to follow him and agree with his opinion. while they’re of course entitled to do so, i think that it’s essential to talk about the negative impact kalvin has had on so many trans people.
also, i know that they’ll probably be lots of comments about this, but i just wanted to quickly add on that i genuinely love your voice :D
hearing the t-voice thing was so funny to me because I have so much gender envy for ashton's voice
i don't get why kalvin doesn't understand the way influence works. he is an immature person who enjoys taking his anger and insecurities out on other people and makes content out of it. that content attracts the same kind of people who enjoy doing those same kinds of things. he doesn't need to explicitly tell his followers to go attack his victims, he has already made it clear that he likes when people get attacked online so of course his followers will take pride in copying him.
I just want to say but I absolutely LOVE the "t-voice". There is like this raspy undertone that just sounds amazing. I think you have an absolutely beautiful voice.
When you said “yeah I have hips and I have an ass I’m sorry” the jealousy I felt was unreal!
you give off very comforting energy for me
the reason I hate the defense his fanbase has of "well it's not his fault his fans are awful" is that he shouldn't be making content that makes that kind of person feel welcome? If he doesn't endorse that behavior they shouldn't be so abundant in his fanbase and he should be more open to Explicitly Disapprove of it. but he doesn't.
Am I the only one who thinks that Ashton should do an ASMR?
They really should!
Agreed. They would be so good at it. Their voice is so calming.
His voice is literally my best defense against anxiety. That and coloring books. Looooooooove coloring books.
when i was a kalvin garrah fan, i used to HATE your videos, simply based on ur thumbnails because you fit the "transtrender sjw" stereotype he talked about a lot, now i absolutely love them, and i love you, i know you probably wont see my comment, but i still feel like i have to apologize. Also your style is super sick, im really happy people are talking about blaire white and kalvin garrah more and more !!
thank you so much for being there for younger trans people
looking awesome as ever!! can't wait to listen to what you have to say!
i think it’s also important to mention how his friends enable him. i used to watch kalvin and two of his friends, ryan (another trans man) and london (a trans woman). london once made a video that was like “being non-binary for a day” that essentially made fun of non-binary people. i believe she’s deleted the video and has changed her views but is still more on the transmed side of believing non-binary people exist. it hurt a lot as someone who was questioning their gender at the time. ryan has also made videos with him making fun of others and calling them “trenders.” i can’t remember if london made any videos with kalvin making fun of others like ryan did but they are both still friends with him. i don’t think they share the exact same views anymore but it’s important to discuss the damage they’ve done as well (obviously kalvin is still the biggest culprit). it rubs me the wrong way that while kalvin deserves to get this criticism, he is seemingly the /only/ one getting criticism when he’s frequently had two other popular transmed youtubers on his channel that baby trans people or cis people can watch as well.
Kalvin was the first person I found when I got curious about trans issues. Because of that first impression I repressed my feelings of being gender queer and became very embarrassed. His hate really does impact people.
who else been subbed for over 2 years?
Andrew Osborn i’m here since day one 😉
@@darklivingroom impressive I found him around 2 maybe 2 and a half years ago when I was really looking for trans content before I came out as trans he is now probably my favorite trans channel on all of youtube finding his channel literally saved my life.
Me
Me 😁
i think since 2018ish. now 2020
you're a really chill dude and i appreciate you
I’m only minutes into this video and I came here after D’angelo Wallace’s video. I’m a Christian who considers myself an ally of the LGBTQ+ community. I’m feeling overwhelmed with conviction at some of the things I heard and held on to from watching kalvin in middle school/freshman year. Thank you for being another source of great information to help me further deconstruct biases I didn’t know I still had. I’m making it a goal to make becoming more accepting of trans people a big part of my prayer time for the foreseeable future.❤️
Oh and also he made fun of a trans furry in his video, and as a fellow trans furry, bruh
There’s nothing wrong with being a furry and Kalvin is an idiot
I love your pfp💙
@@mewmew6158 thank you!! its my art
furries are cool and talented ngl i hope u have a good day
Thank you for speaking out on this. This means a lot as of right now i have been seeing a lot of these videos about kalvin that i actually feel for. I also feel like i need to say my experience with him as this is quite interesting. When i stumbled upon his channel i was very new to being trans. i was constantly watching videos of others getting as much information about being trans and the stuggles that come along with it. I vividly remember watching a video of his where he would say that you can't wear makeup at all as a trans man cause you won't pass. Being me i was gullible enough to believe him but something about that just never sat right with me. i felt like because of him in order to be "trans enough" i had to dress and look a certain way. if not then i was "doing it wrong"
i felt so uncomfertable with looking like the usual passing male but i still felt like a male. i felt so invalid and thought that feeling of wanting to put on makeup still even as a man would go away. but it never did. makeup to me helps me express who i really am. nothing more to that.
I want to say this for the people who went through something similar like this from his channel. YOU ARE VALID. want to wear makeup as a dude then do it. at the end of the day it is YOUR body. no one elses. today i am here to say i wear makeup proudly because i don't care about the gender roles people put on everything. i dress how i want to dress but i know i am still a man and i am still valid no matter what.
sorry for the 300 page essay i just felt the need to say something you know.
I feel like as a kind of camp gay trans man kalvin would mock me for things that plenty of cis gay men do
a lot of us non-binary people used kalvin as a way to suppress our own transness which is so sad and i regret ever being like that. now i’m living as a transmasc agender lesbian and i’m definitely way happier now than i was a few months ago.
I'm nonbinary and always wanted my chest flat, but am afraid of surgery. I know that it will probably go well, but I feel like my body will look unproportionable if top surgery was done. And I think about having a deeper voice too. I'm not looking forward to the increased risk of heart problems, because my Dad had died at 52 from a heart rupture. So it may not be in the cards for me to get those things just yet. Also because I'm trying to get a higher paying job, but I can't at the moment. Transition is a luxury for trans people these days it seems like. Also I've caught myself judging someone else for not getting hormones or surgery, like being a bit nasty in my head but I never said those things out loud. Everyone is valid however they identify. I don't like being called young lady, woman, or ma'am. It's like trying to open a door with the wrong key. It makes me feel numb. :( What are some words that they can use for nonbinary people? >_>
honestly your chest looks badass. I think it reflects a lot of you aesthetic in a way and you look great
Yay you’re back!! Hope you’re doing well
you're so well spoken. thank you for speaking up about him.
I appreciate you for making this video!!! Thank you!
I love you so much, Ashton! You have such a soothing, calming and pleasant presence. I have all my respect for you.
The way your chest was described sounded so bad but my only reaction to seeing it was just "that's bad ass" seriously though it looks cool to me
your consistent and open self love is so.. inspiring to me. I’m questioning my gender identity and im scared to experiment in my expression, but your positivity and style and love is helping me build some confidence to work on myself. Like seriously your sense of style is amazing, i love it!! thank you for making these videos, you truly do have a great positive impact on people.
You're amazing, sending you all the best vibes! ✨
I am in awe at how calm you're being while talking about what Kalvin has done, you come across so mature and confident in yourself, I really admire you for that
Completely off-topic, sorry, but: your eyeliner game slays like crazy!
yay my day sucked now it's decent always love your videos Ashton keep up the good content.
You have such a calming presence. I'm so glad i found your channel.
ikr these long lightly edited videos they make feel so safe and nice
Bro fr tho, your voice is actually really nice to listen to. Its calming and really chill. Keep doing you my guy! 🤘
Friend, I totally respect and appreciate that you don’t try to reclaim a slur. As a queer woman, it really hurts me when cis/het men call me a d*ke. I have confronted two men about this that are my friends. Both were super apologetic citing that they had read that we were “reclaiming it.” It’s one thing if I call myself a d*ke (which I don’t) but it’s hurtful when someone calls me a d*ke who isn’t in the community that wouldn’t be affected by it.
Also, I'm proud of you and I'm proud of Brennan and I'm proud of everyone else speaking out on something that had to have been hard to speak out about.
Thank you for being open about your experience. I really appreciate you.
I love your style, it's super cool. Thanks for being who you are and putting your voice out there. :)