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How To Handle The Grief When Someone You Loved Died | Buddhism In English
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- Опубликовано: 8 дек 2023
- © Buddhism
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#buddhism #grief #death
Mahamevnawa Bodhignana Monastery,
Hewagama, Kaduwela, Sri Lanka.
info@realbuddhism.org
Accepting before the tragedy happens can ease the pain.
The tragedy will happen.
My dad just passed away two days ago. I saw him fade away and he took half of my heart with him. I loved him so very much. Such a great man. We will all miss him dearly until we all meet in heaven. I love you Daddy Boy ❤
My mother died 15 hour ago 😢😢😢 in accident and I can't handle this situation in 17th age 😢 love you so much my mom 😭😭😭😭😭
Tc😢
Hope you get through this hard time
❤ you will feel much pain but let love and blessings in also.. It hurts but mom is sending you love and holds you in her arms❤
Stay calm dear 😢her blessings are always with you❤
Today I had a hard long cry as i felt so sad about my son who passed 7 months ago. Crying hard, loud is needed sometimes. But often am feeling so happy to have had him in my life and gratefull. One day i laid on the mother earth and screamed his name crying and calling him. Feel your feelings. You can do this❤
The practice:
1) know that it is the truth, that you are going to lose the people you live
2) Treasure them, in the limited time you have with them, treat them with kindness.
3) dont make a dead loved one the source of your pain. Cos your loved one wont want that.
Even with practice, we will still feel the pain with a loved one dies.
Well for me it worked somehow. My mother died after having suffered a most horrible cancer for a long time, and the last thing she heard was the dhammacakkappavattana sutta which I facilitated her via earphones. Anicca is one of the three absolute and undeniable realities, there is no way to circunvent them as there is no way to live without breathing. Thanks for the compassionate advice!
Lost my dad in 2017 and my mum 6 month ago...my mum and I were extremely close and I miss her every day I still grieve everyday
Yes I know it's very worst phase in life... It's very hard time to cope with... But trust me just leave on the time... You will be fine... Take care...
I know that this situation is very suffering but you have to forget and start a new life ❤❤❤
I can relate to it ,it leaves a void , that's never filled !
It happens with me too
It's so bad 😞😔
For those who lost the love ones and are in suffering. It's painful because you love them, honor that. At the same time, aware that it's the truth in life, embrace and let go. They just go back to where they were. Don't hang on to the grief, but keep the good memories and forgive yourself to move on. They will always have a special place in your heart, you aren't forgetting them.
This is how I handle the lost of all my family members. Hope this helps.
May Buddha Bless Everyone Especially Those Who Are Having Difficulty In Thier Lives🙏
yes bro life is a game try to play without sadness and sorrw
My father passed on January 1, 2024 from stage 4 lung cancer. Although I experienced grief & continue to, it’s not as bad. I was able to spend his last moments with him, to care for him, pray for him, sit with him, laugh with him. I am forever grateful for those last moments ❤ When my mother passed in 2016 suddenly, that was much worse for me! I didn’t get to say goodbye. Any experiencing loss & grief, take it one moment at a time. Think about the good memories! Honor them forever ♾️
We lost our beautiful cat Jett today, one of 8 but she touched our lives in the 6 years we rescued her and saved her from several illnesses, sadly this illness we couldn’t beat. We are so happy to see your video tonight and as we cry we incorporated joy and laughter and happy memories she left us. Thank you for your timely video.
ohh,,,
Jett will born again somewhere very good and joyful, ❤️
I lost my dog a week ago after having her for 10 years. It's hard, but the joy a pet brings your life is so vast! Jett must've had such a great life because of you :)
Losing a pet is one of the most difficult things we have to experience in life. My heartfelt condolences ❤ Jett was one lucky cat to have you in his life 🤗
Sorry to hear of your loss. There is a song written by Brian May from Queen about his cat, you should take a listen, name of the song:
All dead, All dead
It’s a soothing song
Everything must be left behind. Namo Buddhaya 🙏
I lost my dearest one my husband due to COVID two years ago. Only the individual can feel the deepest. I am still feeling the lost till today. Even though practise meditation, being busy with choas, very close to the creator and the universe, at some gap sadness is always there. 😢
That's TRUE I lost my mom due to covid but the pain is same since I lost her it never fade every one around me but I feel the loneliness deeply
I lost my mom in 2017....I was in shock for 1 year but then I realized this is the toughest reality we must face everytime
Same! 🥺
That's very wholesome. Nobody wants to see their loved ones sad. Especially after their death b'cos then their passing away is the cause of your sadness. That’s being very unselfish. I want to live like that. Namo buddhaya 🙏
𝙰𝚖𝚎𝚗
"For whom passion is abundant, suffering is abundant,
For whom passion is little, suffering is little." ❤
I lost my grandfather, I grew up with him, he was calling me: the soul of my soul
I miss him so much..
Simple and practical that can handle one of the most difficulties situation in our lives. Treating others with kindness is so powerful. I very much appreciate for sharing words of the Buddha. 🙏
Love them unconditionally while we are here .Resolve unkind feelings and any situation that might have come up while they are here. Forgiveness is key.
An elephant named Arjuna died in wild elephant capture operation it has caused me so much grief i had never met him in real but the whole karnataka state people are sad i don't how to forget the pain its hurting me inside 😫🥺
I found your comment unexpectedly. I too cried for days when Arjuna died, it's comforting to know someone else also felt the same way. It's hard to tell people why I was bothered so much when I didn't know the animal personally, but I was heartbroken for days. Thank you for sharing.
My mother died 2013. When I was coming to be with her for one month, unfortunately she has died 20 minute before I have landed to the airport. When I went to see and touch body was cold and left this world. My world is shattered. But I am thankful that she is no longer suffering. RIP mum 🙏🙏🙏
🥺😔
I had a strange sensation when my most beloved dog, Mika, passed on. I was filled with a sensation of bliss. I spent the last few months of her life caring for her with utmost love. I gave her all I could, even the last evening till the last moment, I was there for her. I was very sad to lose this lovely being as I loved her the most. What helped me the most were the memories of how we spent the last few months together when I knew she had late-stage kidney failure. She died before she reached 4 years of age. We all grieve differently, as attachment varies with our relationship with the being that is dying. I have lost one parent, but my grief for Mika was very different. I agree that we must love the dying with care, kindness and compassion, as their time with us is short. That act gives us great solace.
“Don’t make the source of your happiness become the source of your pain.” Thank you for these words.
Don’t make the dead one become the source of your pain. Make people around you become the source of happiness ❤❤❤
Thank you for beautiful teachings
Namo Buddhaya!
The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat,known suffering,known struggle,known loss and have found their way out of the depths.These persons have an appreciation,a sensitivity,and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness,and a deep loving concern.Beautiful people do not just happen.
(Elisabeth Kubler-Ross)
We have to let it go, no matter how hard it is. Thanks for sharing this
Two days ago, Wednesday morning around 11:30am my male lovebird gomu passed away. I tried giving him cpr and mouth to beak. Sprayed water and gave him water but still he didn't survive. He was the kindest. He loved me more I could ever love him. Ii couldn't sleep and cried a lot. I did take him to hospital but it was too late. Vet were not avian expert. I really wish I could have saved him. He's presence mattered to us. My wife is pregnant and she's been sad and crying. Life is ruthless. Why do we get attached even though we know that it's gonna hurt us someday. I was very practical amd tough person but when my gomu the LoveBird died. Only then I realised what softie I am inside. I even cried at office at home, morning. It felt like world ended for me. You're right they have to go. Today or tomorrow. That's truth we have accept. Indeed, lil bird taught me a lesson to love unconditionally everyone because we never know when's the last day.
Thank you for sharing your beautiful, yet painful story. I do completely understand. My beautiful baby, an 8 year old blonde, green-eyed Chihuahua passed suddenly without warning 9-1-22 and has left me devastated. Not one hug from my very abusive spouse on paper only. He got me a new puppy ONE WEEK after the worst loss of my life (and I’ve lost so many friends & family, all very prematurely, too, yet handled each loss with so much grace)
He got me a new pup so I wouldn’t cry on his shoulder. How absolutely cruel to do to both, me and that new baby. One week??? I was still in shock. Shock, not denial. I’m a Nurse; I know all about the stages of grief.
Not one hug, to this day. When I’m crying over Bruiser I’m told, “Get over it!!!” Or, “Oh, not this again.”
Heartless. Most cruel.
I’m trapped, financially, which is why I couldn’t leave such a toxic environment. I’ve added another baby and both are almost 2 years old; so different from my Bruiser, as they should be, but it’s been so hard. Bruiser went viral because he could actually speak human words and phrases and it stunned the World. I taught all tricks & commands in 3 languages (English, Hungarian, and Sign Language just for fun), he was so smart, sweet, nurturing, and filled with gratitude over the littlest of things, such as thanking me simply for putting out a fresh pee pee pad. What dog does that?!! He loved everyone he met and loved ALL animals. He was gentle and so kind. Whenever I looked into his gorgeous green eyes, I could 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭 our creator! He was the purest form of Love I’d ever known. Better, in my opinion, of any romantic kind between humans. I don’t honestly know how I’ve made it almost 2 years without him. I go on for the new babies, but it’s so hard. So very hard. A lot of people do not understand that our animals are like our children. I’m unable to carry full term; miscarriages. So he was absolutely my child. I now feel so utterly alone in this world, yet I’m grateful for the new puppies, even if one came a week after Bruiser’s sudden passing. I will never be ok or feel the joy & happiness I once felt when I had him and I’m so grateful & blessed for having him just a short while.
We were camping and his breathing became slightly increased. So slightly, that nobody else would have ever thought to seek treatment. I called his Vet. She said she doesn’t have oxygen. No oxygen? How does she perform routine spays & neuters? I had to drive hour and a half to an animal hospital. He was completely fine. We get inside & as soon as we reach front desk, he collapsed in my arms where I put his entire snout in my mouth to give him breath. They whisked him away but when they brought me into a room, I just knew it wasn’t good. Doctor comes in to say they revived him 3x and the relief washed over me but she said, “No. it’s not good.”
I went into complete shock the moment another doctor came in and just bowed her head. I didn’t cry. My world just stopped. They were so concerned for me. Then they brought him to me. He was gone. My entire world ended that day.
I’m so glad you & your wife have each other during that time. I had no-one. 💔
This is great ,I try to always live by this, but it is not easy
Sure ain't easy , good days n bad days !🌹
I lost my husband feb 18,2024..so much pain😢😢but now i listen to u..im trying to be okay..
That is so kind and loving. Even though it hurts you you can still smile for the good memories created together❤❤THANK YOU😊❤
I was never ready to face losing my Mother 😢 i miss her immensely 😔💞
Yes... be kind to everyone... you never know when or if you will see them again.
Lost my partner for 3 yrs now. Still miss him so much😢😢😢
This video is very practical and useful, my my elder brother was died before 22 years. He treated me as my father he taken pain in my education, even he was ill. I extended my four is at this moment again. I remember him oftenly in my lifeI am grateful for his dedication.
Vandami Bhante ji and Namo Buddhay!
Thanks for your advice.Really appreciate it..thats why i try not to cry too much and feel the pain cos it will keep coming back and we must understand that if we dont accept the truth, the pain will be in us forever and that is not what their wishes, we must respect them and believe in the care and happiness they have given to us is priceless, we must always remember they are still living in our hearts though they physically left us, just be positive and start to pick yourself up again and life still have to go on, be strong and get up to be a happy person for them as they have begun their lives in a better place , try to leave the shadow of their death and surrender all yourself in God's hands.🙏
I have been watching you for three years and now I have so many things to scatter away among the people surrounding me.
Thank you so much! My brother died two months ago, and I am so grateful for all the good talks we had about life, wisdom etc. while he was ill. I knew it was over when he got too tired to talk. Now I am grateful for these years. 🙏
නමස්කාර වේවා ගරු ස්වාමින්වහන්ස .🎉
"Dont make your source of happiness, the source of your pain." Thank you for this sage and compassionate advice ❤. I looked after my parents' every need when they were alive and love them very dearly. But I am now "making them the source of my pain" as you put it. Thank you for putting it into perspective for me. I will work on myself and try to accept that this was bound to happen one day and now I should cherish their memories and be grateful for the 55+ years that I got to be with them❤
Tqvm for Sharing.. Sometimes we are really very Sad over the Loved ones passing away..But we Still f to move on in Life without them...Noting is permanent..
One Day we too disappear from this world..We leave behind our Sweet memories.. Always be kind , Speak politely n Happy with everyone.. Namobudaya 🙏❤️🙏
Really Really needed of this & you came😊Thank you so much Dearest Bhanteji 😊😌❤️🙏Namo Buddhay 😊😌❤️🙏
My wife of 11 years passed away Sunday night. She has 3 adult children greiving and we have a 7 year old together. I am so sad and even more heartbroken watching her children greive, especially our youngest. So painful.
My grandfather passed away on 04/04/2024....could not cope up with it.I could not speak last words with him.He was a really good human being. Rest in Peace Babuji 💐🙏
Mom dies6whwn i was 4years old. Papa died 6 months acter i left my country to study abroad, (he died when i was 21years) now i am 23years old ...it still feels very new...i feel broken when i think of him.... I just Love him like nothing else and I'll always love him till i die ....
Send the flowers to the ones you love now, not after they pass... great message, love them now, I did treat my love ones with love while they were alive, n have to remember that, trying to not let them be the source o my pain n grief missing them is the hard part tho :(.. esp losing your spouse of 13 yrs in 3 mths to unexpected cancer 8 1 23 .. but yeah, many thanks
Really because we love someone ..that people die we cannot control ❤❤
My sweet cat Harley passed away this year. He was very lovely and friendly. We all miss him. ❤
This is very hard to go through, my sincere condolences. Harley will always have a special place in your heart, this love will never die ❤
@@halcyon-cg2eb Thank you so much for your kind words 🙏
@@bcvc3365 🥰
Yes your video gives me strength i just lost my beloved husband one and half month back. I cant get over it. Pls do more of this type of video
How are you now? Hope you have got some peace , even for a moment ❤
My mother died 7months ago,a week before my engagement.its a really hard to face that pain but i faced,she is my best friend she is the most loving person in my life but i have to face that much of pain.My only wish is for her soul to rest in peace as a tribute to the one who raised me and brought me to where I am today.
Namo buddhaya.
Yes 🤍💛🧡 Feeling Love to them & being Thankful to them 🤍💚💙 no big pain 💜💙💗 Love & Thank & Nature 😘☘️ Thank you!!!
I lost my little brother. due to water incident 🥺🥺. His age was only 3.9 years. and we loved him so much as possible. but he is no more with us. this is very painful for us we are unable to forget him. I'm doing preparation for a big exam, but now my mind is not able to process. I know he will never come back again, but still his images coming in my mind. My dear little brother we always remember you ❤️❤️
Thank you. I just lost the lamp of my soul, my mother. I'm devastated. The holidays are over me. On top of that they terminated me from work Wednesday because of my grief. Now what???? Pls pray for me
🙏
When they come to bury you, remember that you are a seed. Move forward.
🌺🙏✨✨
I faced the same last year mum then dad passed away and I lost job
@@twinklevangie7604 I hope all is well now and you're done with the dark night of the soul. ❤️
Lost my mom this past Saturday the 16th. I'm going to miss her so much
She’s with you , next to you !! You just seeing her physically but she is with you
😢😢cry as much as you can and try to be strong
My fiancée passed away last month. It is one of the hardest pains ever. But I am still strong and our memories together will live with me forever. I am moving forward following my goals with all the good I learned from her and I will make her proud one day. Namo Buddhaya!
me too, my fiancee passed away at 24 jan. i miss him so much, we wanna get married in 3 months💔💔 such a painfull heartbreak ever in this year😭😭❤️🩹❤️🩹
@@uprcxious7248 loss my wife of 13 yrs in 3 mths to unexpected cancer 8 1 23 :( just now able to sleep if i relax enough n - ''everything is alright everything will be ok the lord is in control'' is my motto
Your last one minute was the most powerful -
Sifu, thank you for this powerful wisdom. It has helped me on this day! Namo amitofu ☸️!
Thank you for kindly and respectfully sharing truth with us.
You are such an amazing person. I am so grateful that I have gotten to know you. ❤ ❤😊😊
You are a guide for me 🙏 thank you 💔❤️
My favorite channel ❤ thank you very much 🙏
Reading comments make me feel more sad. Everyone out here has lost someone something precious ones in their life. I hv also lost a very precious person in my life. Even I haven't seen him, I hadn't hear his voice. Nothing. I don't know where he is right now. I m totally unable to move on. Just waiting for God to make us together 🙂
Worldly Buddhist advice of this nature is an urgent necessity today.
This is really for me the best advice. I ❤️ ever listened too.I have my son that will be gone soon because of his own behavior. Its really bad.And i do expspect it very soon. ❤❤❤Thank you so much for this video. It will give me some thing to hold on too.I have bad panic attacks and thats a bad fear.❤❤❤
Namau Budhaya each moment i feel very unhappy painful for my elder RaginiLata died in 46yrs aleft two young child
we are spritual question god Why Ithank you master for
Your great lesson many thanks
Thank you dear for your nice advises, nice blessings
I lost my mother... I lost from last two years...but I am trying to complete her wish and dreams... I am trying very hard but I am not able to achieve... I am so sad and broken...😢😢😢😢😢😢😢
I have the same situation like yours.only difference is I didn't lose hope and keep on working on her wishes and dreams about me, no matter what life throughs at me. Take baby steps to reach your goal. But don't stop yourself just because you face difficulties in your life. That's the mantra to achieve anything in life
I had a miscarriage earlier this year. I didn't know my baby in person but I love her dearly. I miss her every day and I don't feel like I am ever gonna be truly happy again. I feel like I don't deserve to be happy again. The day she died something in me died too. Meditation helped me with the grief but this day changed me. People tell me, it's better this way.
දෙවි පිහිටයි හමුදුරැවනෙ❤❤❤❤
I don't know if I can bear it..
Thank you with all my heart .
나모 붓다야🙏
Namo Bhudhaya 🙏🙏🙏
@kirtirazsolanki984
Thank you💓
나모 붓다야🙏
Time changes everything ✨🌍❤️
Namo buddhaya ✨💙
Ur speech is simply relaxing so immensely, really when we hear ur speech, truly getting some divine feeling in your TRUE words. Pls keep motivating us. 🙏
I lost my big brother the man i love the most im 19 year old its been 2 months the pain inside me is so painful maine kisi se es bare me baat nahi kr pa rahi hu mummy or bhaii ko bhi bata nii sakti i feel hopeless i miss him so much every day its remind me of him ghar oe reh kr padhaii krna bar bar oadhte oafhte yaad aa jati hai unki i try to be happy around people but from inside im really not i know this is the truth of life and im moving in letting go of aal the things but still this loss is something which i cant even imageine guys i know its hard but lets try together to get out of this thing
i lost my best friend 1 yr ago and still couldnt get her out of my mind 😢
Merci pour ces conseils de sagesse .
L impermanence ,le depart de nos etres aimés est cependant tres difficile à accepter .
🙏🇨🇵
So beautiful. Thank you. Namo Buddhaya 🙏💖
Thank for download becouse no network at home , I can watch many time
Celebrate the life... Makes sense.
I think of the smile on Beloved Divine Lord Babaji when he voluntarily left his body in 1984 because his work here was done.
Om Namah Shivayah 🕊️
It's really great thought... But not easy. Thank you Sir 🙏🙏🙏
I agree. My wife is experiencing a serious illness right now and it is very challenging to deal with this in a loving and detached way.
Thank you ❤❤❤
Namo Buddhaya❤❤❤
Thanks thero.l follow your videos.l wish to meet you in Sri Lanka 🙏🏻🌸
Your videos give me strength ❤
Great advice but I think it will still be difficult. I'm very afraid of losing my parents. They're getting old and I don't know how I'm going to react when they pass away.
Yes Kimbuja it will be difficult no matter what anyone says, because of something called Grief. But from experience I can tell you that grief is very different from normal emotional suffering. For example, you may be doing something like cooking, not thinking about anything really,.. then suddenly you feel a surge of pain and you're crying uncontrollably. This is grief. The only good news is that it is a very necessary healing process and it both, happens less and fades in time. So it's best to just allow it to happen, rather than trying to fight it. The one thing I do try to resist however, is adding to the pain by over thinking,--- it's easy to get carried away by your own thoughts in such a sad time. I believe the Buddha's parable of the second arrow can help here. But do of course listen to the great advice of cherishing your parents and I hope every day makes a wonderful future memory. 🙏 And don't forget to hug them 🙂
Agree 100% ❤
There’s a place called The Western Pure Land of Ultimate Bliss would help Sentient Beings no more suffering about the death of Relatives;Especially Our Parents
We must recite Amitabha’s name all the time and make a vow : we want to rebirth in Pure Land
When the time is up we keep reciting Amitabha until our last breath with a vow : Please pick me up to your Pure Land
We will be born into the Western Pure Land and become a Buddha in ONE LIFE TIME
That’s one of the methods the Buddha taught is Pure Land Buddhism ( to end one’s problems and attain lasting happiness)
Watching the video of sister Jiawen:
HOW EXACTLY CAN WE GAIN REBIRTH TO THE PURE LAND
3 criteria which guarantee Rebirth
1- Deep Faith: Believe in Amitabha Buddha
2- Make A Vow : you want to gain rebirth
3- Practice Amitabha - Recitation Constantly in your life
Explaining for your parents understand
So we have no more suffering when our parents go to another world: THE WESTERN PURE LAND OF ULTIMATE BLISS
We can also watch:
Can Mentally Disabled people gain Rebirth to the Pure Land
NAMO AMITABHA BUDDHA
While they’re with you make sure .. you talk to them very kindly, ask about how are they feeling, ask about their medication details, take them for walk, sit and eat food with them, watch tv with them and laugh and ask their opinions and always take pics and video clips of them, say good morning and good night to them each day
No one know this, don't feed into it until the time comes. Who said they are going to pass before you, stay in the here/now when you are with them. Some things we are in control of this is not one of them, just make this day great for now enjoy it. 👍
Yesterday i lost my best friend my girlfriend my love she was everything to me she was suffering from so much pain but i am happy for her that now baby is resting in peace and i also know that her soul will never die only physically she is not here and one day i will name my daughter on her name her soul will always be with me i will always love her i will always be attached with her and one day in afterlife i will meet her and hug her
My father recently passed away. I wasn't sad. No feeling for him . He was a horrible father, a horrible, abusive monster to my mom, cheat on her , beat, kick her. Copdid nooooothing!!!!! I'm glad he , recently, passed. They took his body away from the house. I wont have to see him again. Idc where he's buried, won't visit him. Didn't even cry for him
Thank you❤❤❤
Good evening, Bhanteji 🙏.
Could you please provide a suggestion or solution for the following situations?
1. How to handle if someone or group is forcing you to say something which is not in your beliefs, otherwise they are going to kill?
2. How to keep family (wife, children and parents) happy and healthy environment?
Namo Budhdhaya🙏
going to kill ? you asking a monk about this ? this is your situation you can handle to divide that group people as invidual ...if it is life threaten then lodge a police complaint ....its not easy to handle a morans or rowdies or killers
Very wise words.🙏🏻
Thanks God n universe angels and thank you so much thero❤
But the thing is, when we treat them nicely and kindly a bond is created within ourselves even without our knowledge and when we offer them nice memories the same memories will be our memories as well without our knowledge, and then, that bond and the memories also will create a suffering and make us sad. I would like to have an answer. Namo buddhaya
We have little time this people
Namo budhaya 🙏🏼 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼
My best friend died at 19 after falling into cardiac arrest... All I can say is thank you 🙏
Bhante, please provide us with a guided impermanence meditation. 🙏
Namo Buddhay 💙
Namo buddhaya great advice🙏🙏🙏
Beautiful advise. Thank you ❤
Today is 7th month of my dad's death i still don't know how will i overcome this I love you my dad
Namo Buddhaya 🙏 ❤
නමෝ බුද්ධාය 🙏❤️
So wonderful thankyou ❤️😊
Please make a video on " Bramchrya " .!!
It will help us ❤ ..!!