I remember hearing this review at the time and laughing then a few years later stumbling across this film on tv one night and it’s even worse than I could of imagined
Shared by the Kermode & Mayo's Film Reviews Facebook page today--pretty cool. I had a lot of fun posting all my favorite rants back in the day. Pretty sure this was the first one I uploaded.
Guessing you don’t have ‘sex lives of the potato men’ hanging about anywhere still, I keep hearing about it but it’s not on youtube or the web in general as far as I can work out.
Sadly, no. I e-mailed the BBC about it several years ago and they said they didn't have any podcasts archived before May 2005. I've scoured the internet and found a lot of Kermode deep cuts from his days with Mark Radcliffe but still no Sex Lives of the Potato Men. It's the Holy Grail of Kermode rants, heh.
Another reference to that horrific monstrosity that is "Sex Lives of the Potato Men"... I would LOVE to hear Mark Kermode's review of that film. I've been searching for it for months but only ever found written quotes from it.
"If I was a GP and someone came into my office and pitched Revolver, I would reach for the medicine cabinet, I would prescribe electroshock therapy, leeches, get men in white coats, take their shoes away..." LOL
I saw this at the cinema in Finsbury Park/Holloway. The film suddenly stopped and everyone thought there was a problem with the projector - but that was the end of the film.
I'm loving Kermode. Though I differ with him on many movies, his Tarantino critiques & Ritchie hatred mirror my own - the only difference would be I hated the Holmes movies. This is hysterical!
@Svelter I'm with you. Kermode admitted in another review that he liked elements of Lock Stock, particularly after the Americans branded it as a comedy. As far as mindless entertainment, Lock Stock, Sherlock Holmes and even Snatch are good fun. It's when he took himself seriously as an auteur that things went south.
"We will bleed you dry ,You will give us every penny you have got. Its only natural that you somehow thing you are being conned." *Somehow being conned!!!* I think the fact that you straight up told Jason to give you all his money was a bit of a give away.
I remember reading a preview of this film in a magazine (probably Empire) describing the complex themes of this film and it said "He's read a few books that Guy Ritchie" Yeah, and it seems like he didn't understand any of them! Guy Ritchie has always struck me as being a bit thick.
To be honest, I like Lock Stock as well, and in my mind, Ritchie has yet to make something that good again. Snatch was an incoherent mess, Swept Away while still enjoyable was very campy & while the Sherlock Holmes films were good, they were just good mainstream films. I hope his next film. The Man from UNCLE may be that good, but I doubt it.
Andrew Tregoning True. I thought that Snatch was incoherent. It tried to juggle too many plots, and because of it, it becomes really incoherent. If people are calling Ricthie a Tarintino knock-off, and that Lock Stock was his Reservoir Dogs, Snatch is definitely not his Pulp Fiction, but rather his Four Rooms.
He's a critic! He has to watch films he might not particularly like. Also, 'critic' implies negativity but he praises films, directors and actors very regularly.
Critic, is short for engaging critically, meaning not blindly thinking everything is great/poor, though thinking about how personally relate to and understand. Critic does not imply negative, this is a common misconception.
Believe it or not, I actually think he's pretty good in Revolver. The one redeeming feature. And he's also good in a movie called London. He just needs to step out of his comfort zone every once in a while.
I still remember Guy Ritchie said that the only people who would like Revolver are super intelligent. I thought it was an arongant statement and killing your audience. There was nothing clever about this film.
He's always been a ratchet Tarantino, but part of me wants to watch this movie just for the commentary. Which I hear is DREADFUL. But 7(?) years on I still can't bring myself to part with my money.
+cx1735 Search for Adam and Joe Revolver so you can hear little bits of it. It's hysterical. Ritchie genuinely seems to believe that he's the first person to come up with the notion that chess is analogous to life.
@Svelter I'll take your word for it. I haven't seen it in years. And I agree on Snatch, but I still enjoy it as disposable entertainment. Plus, I absolutely love Brad Pitt as a mumbling Irish gypsy.
I enjoyed this movie very much. It is not top-shelf drama by any means, and the central idea of the film is overcooked, but the actors are charismatic and engaging, the cinematography and editing are wonderful, and the movie is just plain fun, not a boring scene in it. I never saw Swept Away. I mean, why would I, it had fucking Madonna on a deserted island, anyone who saw that deserved what they got. You were supposed to know better than to watch that movie in the first place. But Lock, Stock and Snatch are classic, and Revolver is a pretty good effort, and worth seeing if you like Guy Ritchie movies.
When I first started watching "Revolver" it was the philosophical stuff that I really liked about it because it did feel different and clever. I felt like I was watching a new take on things which is always kind of exciting. Now I feel like an asshole. Thanks for that.
@marasmusine I agree with you! Mark Strong was amazing in this turd of a movie. Those glasses! The sinister quiet! It was the first movie I've seen him in, and I was really impressed. The rest of the movie was stunningly bad. When Ray Liotta snapped up in bed and PULLED ON A HAIRNET, I lost all respect. And THE NERVE of Ritchie, to get philosophers on at the end to try to legitimize that rubbish. Ick.
This film is a masterpiece. It is Truth staring back at you. Look in the mirror, face your demons and stop caring what other people think of you. It's not about cheap thrills and funny jokes it's a letter from the Director telling you to WAKE UP! "If we knew this we wouldn't be doing it" After watching it for the first time literally today I'm surprised to find out it isn't well received. I personally think it's up there with the Matrix Trilogy as one of the most thought provoking films of all time and if people can't get the topics it touches on then they just aren't ready to contemplate life and are more interested in films that offer an escape from reality opposed to a film that chooses instead to confront it.
I thought it was campy but really quite enjoyable and different. Mark Strong was fantastic. I think a big part of how you like it depends on which cut you see- I can't remember how many different cuts there are, but I saw the one with the 'pool' ending. The other versions are shit and about 20 minutes shorter.
Heres proof that people have no idea what constitutes fimmaking anymore. No one understands anymore that films tell stories. The caller liked it bacause he thought that the visuals were a bit clever.
@Ballowall Theres a difference between being clever and making a movie that goes back and forward to past and present events that all tie in at the end
How can you not like Lock, Stock & 2 Smoking Barrels or even more Snatch? One of the best comedies of at least a generation? I actually liked Revolver, and still do, but now I question Me Kermode's taste and what seems a huge ego.
NP! If you've ever experienced depression, anxiety, or any other mental suffering, there's a greater chance you'll be able to appreciate the underlying message.
@ 5:04-5:15 is why, regardless of how much I dislike Guy Ritchie or his appalling movies, I will always have more respect for the person who risks something by creating a film(or a song or a book or a game or whatever) than for the critic who risks very little, sometimes nothing at all, by giving their opinion on it. I quite like Kermode - he's entertaining in a frantic sort of way, and...prolific, I suppose(I can always find a YT Kermode review of any film - which is cool) - but that quote perfectly, and unintentionally, crystallises the difference in terms of honesty, guts, risk, etc. between artists(or Guy Ritchie) and their critics.
guy Ritchie has lots of money though so it's not much of a risk and if he made a good film Mark would endorse it like he did with sherlock homes. I do understand what you mean about the critic not having made a film themselves however anyone could probably do better job at making revolver.
kermode is an artist in his own right ... his review are elevated to artistic status, plus which hes a prolific musician and writer, hes a cultural entity with contemporary validity and relevance
Guy Ritchie is a mockney chancer who has been given chances that no other person would have been given. it pays to know the right people, just wish it wasn't so painfully obvious.
I just saw it (the cut version on the Region-1 DVD) and found it quite enjoyable. Sure it's pretentious and leaves a bunch of plot strands and characters loose and hanging, but it's twisty, well performed, and beautifully shot. Mark Strong is in it and he steals the movie whenever he appears. His character, a soft-walking hit man, is good enough to lead one movie. Mark Kermode, an intelligent middle-brow critic, tends to hate a lot of stuff for very small-minded reasons.
THE LAST PLACE YOU WOULD LOOK FOR YOUR ENEMY IS THE HEAD INSIDE THE FOOT OF THE COLOR GREEN AND THE NUMBER SEVEN...Absolutely superb.
Reminds you immediately of the The Counsellor review
"He has to wake up tomorrow and think, I made Revolver"
@JOE IS DRIVIN SUNNY FLORIDA Not that bad. I’m not a critic though.
Ray Lee Otter, the greatest actor of a generation.
Director of 2001: A Space Oddity. Very strong Alan Partridge vibes here
I fucking love Mark Kermode. Especially in rant mode. The only film critic I have any respect for by far.
did they stop letting people phone in after Barry? Good decision
I remember hearing this review at the time and laughing then a few years later stumbling across this film on tv one night and it’s even worse than I could of imagined
Could have
"Pithy but a bit rubbish quotes" great line
" 2 stars out of 20 " Died of laughter right there.
9:48 'numerical, kabbalistic, colour spectrum claptrap'
What a great turn of phrase!
Shared by the Kermode & Mayo's Film Reviews Facebook page today--pretty cool. I had a lot of fun posting all my favorite rants back in the day. Pretty sure this was the first one I uploaded.
Guessing you don’t have ‘sex lives of the potato men’ hanging about anywhere still, I keep hearing about it but it’s not on youtube or the web in general as far as I can work out.
Sadly, no. I e-mailed the BBC about it several years ago and they said they didn't have any podcasts archived before May 2005. I've scoured the internet and found a lot of Kermode deep cuts from his days with Mark Radcliffe but still no Sex Lives of the Potato Men. It's the Holy Grail of Kermode rants, heh.
SkagWinesack you posted this 9 years ago. FUCKKKKKKK
Another reference to that horrific monstrosity that is "Sex Lives of the Potato Men"... I would LOVE to hear Mark Kermode's review of that film. I've been searching for it for months but only ever found written quotes from it.
I was forced to endure this movie by a dude I sort of knew. It's nice to hear someone sensible slag the movie off.
I am so pleased that Mark defends Fire Walk With Me. Great movie.
"He has to wake up tomorrow morning and think: I MADE REVOLVER!!" Hahahaha damn so hillarious.
play this at 0.75 speed and kermode is every drunk guy that ever tried to speak to you during your lunch break
Why would he be drunk during your lunch break? Doesn't make sense
i can relisten to this clip so many times
"If I was a GP and someone came into my office and pitched Revolver, I would reach for the medicine cabinet, I would prescribe electroshock therapy, leeches, get men in white coats, take their shoes away..."
LOL
I love Kermode's Madonna impression!
I saw this at the cinema in Finsbury Park/Holloway. The film suddenly stopped and everyone thought there was a problem with the projector - but that was the end of the film.
This review always makes me laugh my ass off and feel good
"I loved it!"
2 mins later
"Not that bad, not brilliant"
That caller is crazy. He loved it, and then calls it a 2 star film. What the hell?
I'm loving Kermode. Though I differ with him on many movies, his Tarantino critiques & Ritchie hatred mirror my own - the only difference would be I hated the Holmes movies. This is hysterical!
Ray? Ray? I mean...you've done some funny things in your career, but really?
@Svelter I'm with you. Kermode admitted in another review that he liked elements of Lock Stock, particularly after the Americans branded it as a comedy. As far as mindless entertainment, Lock Stock, Sherlock Holmes and even Snatch are good fun. It's when he took himself seriously as an auteur that things went south.
"I'm going to play the trailer to get it out of the way"- foreshadowing
Looks like a criminal in you prof
"We will bleed you dry ,You will give us every penny you have got. Its only natural that you somehow thing you are being conned."
*Somehow being conned!!!* I think the fact that you straight up told Jason to give you all his money was a bit of a give away.
I remember reading a preview of this film in a magazine (probably Empire) describing the complex themes of this film and it said "He's read a few books that Guy Ritchie" Yeah, and it seems like he didn't understand any of them! Guy Ritchie has always struck me as being a bit thick.
lock stock is a great film, it just depends what you're judging on - substance or entertainment imo
Anything that's truly entertaining (i.e. not just entertaining for idiots) is always substantive as well.
To be honest, I like Lock Stock as well, and in my mind, Ritchie has yet to make something that good again. Snatch was an incoherent mess, Swept Away while still enjoyable was very campy & while the Sherlock Holmes films were good, they were just good mainstream films. I hope his next film. The Man from UNCLE may be that good, but I doubt it.
i watched snatch for the first time yesterday actually, i totally agree with you, it made me mad!
Andrew Tregoning True. I thought that Snatch was incoherent. It tried to juggle too many plots, and because of it, it becomes really incoherent. If people are calling Ricthie a Tarintino knock-off, and that Lock Stock was his Reservoir Dogs, Snatch is definitely not his Pulp Fiction, but rather his Four Rooms.
...Unless you think Pulp Fiction is an incoherent mess as well. Snatch is much, much better than his later films, anyway.
I’ve just found out from my TV Guide book that Revolver is on Comedy Central on Friday the 13th of March at 10pm!
"I feel sorry for Guy Ritchie because I can wake up tomorrow thinking'I didn't make that film' but he's going to wake up thinking 'I made Revolver'!!"
"Honestly, it's one of the most beautiful films that I produced in six years. I'm in love with this film."
Luc Besson
i enjoyed revolver. then again i am a big fan of existential films.
Thank you. I feel cleansed.
"Lock Stock and Snatch" sounds like a separate film on its own.
😂
Green isn't in the middle of the colour spectrum. Cyan is.
It's a movie in the rare position of not being quite as bad as many people say... but also being a movie that dares you to admit just how bad it is.
Jason Statham in a wig???
"Two stars of?" Kermode: "Twenty"
I can't imagine people so dense that they'd compare a masterpiece like Fire Walk With Me with Revolver
Love when Mark quotes from the press notes and calls it out on its BS! LOL. Great fun!
Totally sweet Sham 69 reference.
would love to see kermode's face when the caller says he loves it
I love how weary he sounds at the start of it. You know you're in for a good rant then!
4:30 - Ray Liotta's screen test for Avatar...
Kermode's laugh at 10:00 is brilliant
:)
Funny that he says that he never liked Lock Stock even though he praised it in other reviews....
He does change opinion a bit, which to be fair mine does too, but normally films grow on me , not the other way round lol
i saw it when it came out and just thought it was very dull. i think i'm ready to watch it again
"We can't get it, so, lets hate it"
P.S: BEST MOVIE EVER.
He's a critic! He has to watch films he might not particularly like. Also, 'critic' implies negativity but he praises films, directors and actors very regularly.
Critic, is short for engaging critically, meaning not blindly thinking everything is great/poor, though thinking about how personally relate to and understand. Critic does not imply negative, this is a common misconception.
I like it. I bought it on DVD and have watched it a few times.
Believe it or not, I actually think he's pretty good in Revolver. The one redeeming feature. And he's also good in a movie called London. He just needs to step out of his comfort zone every once in a while.
Just finished watching Revolver I really liked it but I can see why people wouldn't like it.
I still remember Guy Ritchie said that the only people who would like Revolver are super intelligent. I thought it was an arongant statement and killing your audience. There was nothing clever about this film.
Lock Stock and two smoking sna.... no wait... that's a totally different kina movie :\
'I can wake up tomorrow morning, and think: I didn't make that film!'
Exactly. His three best films.
He's always been a ratchet Tarantino, but part of me wants to watch this movie just for the commentary. Which I hear is DREADFUL. But 7(?) years on I still can't bring myself to part with my money.
+cx1735 Search for Adam and Joe Revolver so you can hear little bits of it. It's hysterical. Ritchie genuinely seems to believe that he's the first person to come up with the notion that chess is analogous to life.
I can’t think of a film on a lower multiple of talent involved to quality of product.
Reviews are only opinion, it's not like Kermode is standing outside cinemas preventing people from buying tickets.
I wanna watch the movie now JUST because of Kermode's review! #Mad4Kermode
Honestly, it is so tiresome, it is physically impossible to watch the whole thing.
Ten more years!
F E A R M E !
worst film ever...i actually walked out of the cinema
@Svelter I'll take your word for it. I haven't seen it in years. And I agree on Snatch, but I still enjoy it as disposable entertainment. Plus, I absolutely love Brad Pitt as a mumbling Irish gypsy.
I enjoyed this movie very much. It is not top-shelf drama by any means, and the central idea of the film is overcooked, but the actors are charismatic and engaging, the cinematography and editing are wonderful, and the movie is just plain fun, not a boring scene in it. I never saw Swept Away. I mean, why would I, it had fucking Madonna on a deserted island, anyone who saw that deserved what they got. You were supposed to know better than to watch that movie in the first place. But Lock, Stock and Snatch are classic, and Revolver is a pretty good effort, and worth seeing if you like Guy Ritchie movies.
I genuinely think that Mark Kermode is the most entertaining man on the planet.
I'm glad we agree I'm the only one with a point to make. Anything else to add?
What has MK created in his life I hear you say well music for one as a double bass and harmonica player in the dodge brothers.
mark's freaking hilarious here.
Thank you.....I havn't seen Revolver yet. If you have let me know what you think.
I loved Lock Stock, Snatch, Revolver and RockNRolla. All of them rock.
revolver is the only movie showing in hell
Eraserhead should show in hell. Great film, but nothing else would fit the atmosphere so well.
Along with A Serbian Film and Fred: The Movie
Did this film leave Mark SCREAMING LIKE THIS? SCREAMING LIKE THIS?
When I first started watching "Revolver" it was the philosophical stuff that I really liked about it because it did feel different and clever. I felt like I was watching a new take on things which is always kind of exciting. Now I feel like an asshole. Thanks for that.
I loved Revolver
Admit it, how much you admire Barry for calling in ?
@marasmusine I agree with you! Mark Strong was amazing in this turd of a movie. Those glasses! The sinister quiet! It was the first movie I've seen him in, and I was really impressed.
The rest of the movie was stunningly bad. When Ray Liotta snapped up in bed and PULLED ON A HAIRNET, I lost all respect. And THE NERVE of Ritchie, to get philosophers on at the end to try to legitimize that rubbish. Ick.
Brillant
It's not that nobody really got it, it's just not many people are able to appreciate the message.
This film is a masterpiece. It is Truth staring back at you. Look in the mirror, face your demons and stop caring what other people think of you. It's not about cheap thrills and funny jokes it's a letter from the Director telling you to WAKE UP! "If we knew this we wouldn't be doing it"
After watching it for the first time literally today I'm surprised to find out it isn't well received. I personally think it's up there with the Matrix Trilogy as one of the most thought provoking films of all time and if people can't get the topics it touches on then they just aren't ready to contemplate life and are more interested in films that offer an escape from reality opposed to a film that chooses instead to confront it.
@graemeoliver84 Reminds me of an exchange from A Fish Called Wanda: "Apes don't read philosophy...yes they do, Otto, they just don't understand it."
The bit where Ray Liota is screaming "FEAR ME" is one of the all time funniest movie moments. Definitely one of the worst films ever.
He's a film critic. It's his job
I thought it was campy but really quite enjoyable and different. Mark Strong was fantastic. I think a big part of how you like it depends on which cut you see- I can't remember how many different cuts there are, but I saw the one with the 'pool' ending. The other versions are shit and about 20 minutes shorter.
You hit the nail on the head ha ha niice one !
Very charming.
To be honest, I've just won £900 at a Casino (ironic, given the movie) and don't really care about your attempts to bring me down.
Smart like a pair of little boys shoes.
Heres proof that people have no idea what constitutes fimmaking anymore. No one understands anymore that films tell stories. The caller liked it bacause he thought that the visuals were a bit clever.
@Ballowall Theres a difference between being clever and making a movie that goes back and forward to past and present events that all tie in at the end
How can you not like Lock, Stock & 2 Smoking Barrels or even more Snatch? One of the best comedies of at least a generation? I actually liked Revolver, and still do, but now I question Me Kermode's taste and what seems a huge ego.
Kermode has it in for Ritchie because he mugs off the public schoolboys in lock stock.
NP! If you've ever experienced depression, anxiety, or any other mental suffering, there's a greater chance you'll be able to appreciate the underlying message.
How can commode seriously say snatches a bad film it’s a British Great Lock stock is alright but snatches definitely a great film
This spelling gave me an aneurysm.
@TulseLuper Your shot choice for the example scene is a lot better than the one in the actual movie.
@ 5:04-5:15 is why, regardless of how much I dislike Guy Ritchie or his appalling movies, I will always have more respect for the person who risks something by creating a film(or a song or a book or a game or whatever) than for the critic who risks very little, sometimes nothing at all, by giving their opinion on it.
I quite like Kermode - he's entertaining in a frantic sort of way, and...prolific, I suppose(I can always find a YT Kermode review of any film - which is cool) - but that quote perfectly, and unintentionally, crystallises the difference in terms of honesty, guts, risk, etc. between artists(or Guy Ritchie) and their critics.
guy Ritchie has lots of money though so it's not much of a risk and if he made a good film Mark would endorse it like he did with sherlock homes. I do understand what you mean about the critic not having made a film themselves however anyone could probably do better job at making revolver.
Then you've obviously never heard of criticism as art, and as such, should probably have a think about that, and get back to us.
kermode is an artist in his own right ... his review are elevated to artistic status, plus which hes a prolific musician and writer, hes a cultural entity with contemporary validity and relevance
Guy Ritchie is a mockney chancer who has been given chances that no other person would have been given. it pays to know the right people, just wish it wasn't so painfully obvious.
I dont care if he have connection or is the son of a famous whatever that kind stuff is irrelevant really
Don't talk shit.
What has this got to do with Mark Kermode on Revolver?
Yeah maybe halfway through he realized the error of his ways and tried to correct himself.
im with kermode on statham, think he has is moments. then again I enjoyed lock stock and found it absolutely hilarious
I just saw it (the cut version on the Region-1 DVD) and found it quite enjoyable. Sure it's pretentious and leaves a bunch of plot strands and characters loose and hanging, but it's twisty, well performed, and beautifully shot. Mark Strong is in it and he steals the movie whenever he appears. His character, a soft-walking hit man, is good enough to lead one movie. Mark Kermode, an intelligent middle-brow critic, tends to hate a lot of stuff for very small-minded reasons.