Edward Woodward's accent is spot on, the right region too. Many English actors would have done some sort of Glaswegian or even an Edinburgh accent but Woodward hits it right on the head.
The original Wicker Man is a BRILLIANT film. The ending is one of the best denouements of a horror film. It is my favorite horror film besides Picnic at Hanging Rock (early Peter Weir) and The Exorcist (Kermode loves it as well :). I am a yank and when I heard this film was being "remade" starring Nicolas Cage I just started quaking with a combination of rage and terror as I KNEW it would be an abomination. Ugh.
Good choices. Picnic at Hanging Rock is great. The remake has a certain "so-bad-it's-good" quality, but all of the funniest bits happen in the last half hour. Otherwise, Kermode is absolutely right. It's mostly a crashing bore. Cage's character makes no sense and neither does LaBute's feminist allegory. It also doesn't make sense that the film is set in America at all. In Cage's defense, I don't think it's his fault. Not even Daniel Day-Lewis could make a line as stupid as "NOT THE BEES" work.
I thought beginning of the film was where the plane lands at the island. It wasn’t until I saw a much later edit in which it actually begins on the mainland. (This makes the film a hell of a lot more understandable as you’re watching it by the way)
You have to give Cage at least a little bit of credit for his over-the-top performance. It's like he read the script and thought "Well, there's nothing I can do to make this good. But I CAN make it entertaining."
I'm always reminded of a quote, I can't remember by who, I can't remember from where, so I might be slightly paraphrasing: "In good movies, Nicholas Cage is good. In bad movies, he's indispensable."
This [the remake] is one of the funniest films I've ever seen. I've seen it something like 9 times and I laugh all the way through every time...... It's so damn funny. These days there are lots of films where there's lots of nodding/winking at the camera and everybody knows what they're doing. Every so often though a film comes along where it's evident that nobody knew what they were doing at all. Whenever I see it's on t.v. I've got to watch it - it's hilarious :)
Oh, this is well beyond Mike Stoklasa. Mark is describing "The Lorelei Signal", an episode of the Star Trek _animated series._ I doubt Mike's even seen it.
A group of friends and I played the 'Nicolas cage drinking game' a little while ago; Wicker Man was the first film in the line-up and I was almost paralytic by the end of it.
Blood on Satan's Claw was on tv the other night.I remember watching that when I was a kid and scaring myself to death. It seemed a bit tamer 30 odd years later but still class.
I wish he elaborated on what he thought wong with the original. I love it. It has a very slow creepy atmosphere that seems to be a trademark of British horror films. In the absence of big budget special effects one needs a stronger story of interesting characters. Apart from the human sacrifice aspect I wouldn't mind living on Summerisle. The oundtrack was also pretty good and I have a few songs on my Ipod, such as Gently Johnny (unfortunately sans the Christopher Lee recitation of the Walt Whitman poem) and the very beautiful Corn Rigs. The music is so out of step with the nature of the film but it creates a total and plausible environment of these people living on this island. I don't think many would have the confidence to intentionally sabotage the suspense of their film. If Mark refers to character's inconsistencies I think it just makes them all the more plausible. Humans are seldom consistent and have lapses of reason. It as among my favorite British horror films which include Village of the Damned, Curse of the Werewolf, and Curse (Night) of the Demon. Sadly as the attention span rapidly diminishes these films (or anyone wishing to make something more "old fashion" ) are now an almost extinct species, washed away by the tide of gore and when remade they have to include such effects and jump scares to keep the audience alert and aware.
I'm not sure I could make a case that it's "the best" film I've ever seen, but it's a strong candidate for, not just my favourite "horror" film, but actually my favourite.film. I love every frame of it, and the way the music meshes with Sgt. Howie's experiences of Summerisle is just brilliant. Edward Woodward's performance is pitch-perfect. So often stuck playing cardboard villains, Christopher Lee gives the performance of his career, showing a nuanced character that can be as ironic and knowing as he can be terrifyingly deaf to Howie's pleas. The film is low budget, and it's sometimes obvious that they weren't filming in May, but it loses none of it's charm for that, and the scenery is gorgeous. At turns disturbing and thoughtful, creepy and beautiful, I think The Wicker Man is a gem. I even try to limit watching it to no more than once every couple of years, just so I won't get jaded with it! :-)
I am very forgiving of minor flaws. If it has a good story and good characters little inconsistences get a pass. David Cronenberg shot the Dead Zone in Canada and only bares a passing resemblance to its actual New England setting. Yeah, the praise seems a little over the top. "The Citizen Kane of horror movies?" that seems unjustified. It's very good but there are better horror movies, but can this even be placed in the horror genre. It's not even really supernatural. What might be a proper category? It's low budget and low key aspects certainly work in its favor. Any big special effects (apart from titular Wicker Man) would be wrong and a distraction. This is the distinction between European and American movies. European films are more about the content whereas American movies are as subtle as a mallet to the head. A modern audience would not sit through the original Wicker Man. They'd be bored to death within the first thirty minutes and if they stay till the end they will be absolutely disappointed as well being utterly puzzled and probably angry that their bloodlust was not appeased. It's not The Human Centipede.If I were to compile a list of my favorite horror movies Wicker Man would on it but not very high---not top ten, perhaps top twenty.
GREG FREEMAN Yes, I agree that some of the critical praise has been over the top. It's more of a film that personally resonates - a favourite, if not the favourite. I can defend it critically as a very good film, but I'm not going to hold it up with Citizen Kane. That a film like Human Centipede exists and has a big enough audience to warrant a couple of sequels is pretty depressing. I'm not in principle against "body horror" or gore, but when I read the synopsis I couldn't detect a hint of _anything_ besides a drawn out sadistic yuck-fest. No attempt to create a story, or even build suspense, just the kind of thing that, if it fails to make you sick, may succeed in making you fall asleep. Thankfully, films like _Let the Right One In_ still get made, too. (Another fine film that _just had_ to have a pointless American remake, come to think of it.)
By the way, I didn't mention that, when I'm talking about the original Wicker Man, I'm talking about the Director's Cut version. This was the first version I saw, as I was pretty late coming to this film (I saw it on, if I remember, channel 4 some years ago, and it was introduced by none other than Mark Kermode). When I later saw the shorter theatrical release (if memory serves, it's around 15 minutes shorter) I didn't like it as much - the pace felt all wrong to me, Howie is apparently on the island for just one night, and there are some thematically important scenes moved and/or cut down, like the scenes with Howie in the church early in the film. I realise there's a case to be made for the shorter version being more streamlined or whatever, but I thought I'd point out which version I was talking about, as I much prefer the DC.
I am assuming that it was the full version I saw as well. I'd need examples of scenes that were cut out to compare to the version I recorded close to twenty years ago. All the songs and nudity is tthere. I was late in "discovering" Mark Kermode but it has only been four years since I have been with a computer. When I saw his rants about the Sex and the City movies and Little Man I was an instant fan. I have never heard a critic aim his hostility at the fans who by ways of buying tickets to these celluliod abominations are perpetuating this trash and ought to be ashamed of themselves. I loved it. Lately I've been disappointed in the movies he's been praising and have since drifted away from him. I occassionally peek in on his RUclips page. I am glad that I am not alone in thinking Quentin Taratino is a hack and his constant bashing of Michael Bay is awesome. Mediocrity must be stamped out but, alas, our numbers are few in comparison to those who eat this stuff up with a big spoon. I don't mind genre movies if they have any sort of imagination but louder and dumber seems to be the prevailing mantra. At the 3D craze has died down a little. I hope European movies are better because over here it's pretty much just trash that will be forgotten within a short span of time. No more timeless classics,
He has a handful of solid films: Leaving Las Vegas, Adaptation, Raising Arizona, Wild at Heart, Bringing Out the Dead, Matchstick Men. Recently, he gave a terrific performance in Werner Herzog's remake of Bad Lieutenant. Yeah, he's done a lot of garbage, but I don't like to write him off completely. And at least when he's bad, he's interesting whereas Keanu Reeves is just a plank.
I love both, for different reasons. The original is rightly considered a horror classic and the remake combines its bizarre scripting decisions and insane scenery-chewing performances with just enough unerlying cinematic competence that it's a very fun and memorable ride in its own way. Both have earned their places in pop culture history imo.
About the original Wicker Man: there is nothing, nothing, nothing scarier than Christopher Lee prancing around a fire with long hair. Trust me. RIP Edward Woodward, a man whose name he said sounded like someone farting in the bath.
Mark Kermode is spot on with this review, the 1973 original is superb, were's this 2006 remake is a mere importer by comparison... It just shows that the major Hollywood studios are running out of ideas, so have to resort to 'rebooting' great classic films...
@TulseLuper "The Gift" is perhaps the only movie where Keanu Reeves actually comes off as genuinely menacing. Sam Raimi deserves HUGE credit for getting that performance out of him.
The original wicker man is a fantastic film, I'm so lucky I saw it when I was a kid on night late BBC before the awful remake managed to ruin it for me.
Critics didn't give the remake any thought when it first came out. I first heard about the bear suit scene on an IMDb message board. It wasn't until the DVD came out with the "NOT THE BEES" alternate ending that people discovered what a turkey it is. The last 25 minutes are hysterical.
@mcfarlanerd Actually my personal favourite is just before that with the exposition par excellence of : "THIS IS MURDER! MURDER! YOU'LL ALL BE GUILTY! AND YOU'RE DOING IT FOR NOTHING!"
always thought the strength of origenal wicker man was like that of give me shelter in that theres a feeling of forboding and unease that seems to exude through out the whole film rather than any one seen.... made around the same time as well come to think of it
There have been some staggeringly bad American remakes of classic British films, but this one takes the fondant fancy. I'm convinced it was revenge for us producing Shakin' Stevens as a retort to Elvis.
@JamesOhGoodie Well remember, "Not the Bees" is part of the alternate ending that is only avaliable on DVD. I saw the film in theatres for a laugh and it cut that whole scene out, opting to have "Killing me won't bring back your goddamn honey" in voiceover.
Recipe' for the U.S. remake: Take out everything that made the original special- the religious conflict, the music, the sexiness, the humor. Make it about a guilt-haunted man vs. Amish Wiccan Feminazis. HOW COULD THAT LOSE???
I took the DVD case for 'The Wicker Man' up to the counter in Woolies back in about 2007, having seen it many years earlier and eager to finally own it. I didn't really pay much attention as I'd assumed the teenager at the counter knew what she was doing. Took it home, slid it in the machine and watched it begin to unfold. I knew immediately what she'd done before the menu screen came up, she'd put the wrong bloody film in the box. I thought, sod it, I'll watch it anyway - awful, just awful. Worse than 'Basic Instinct 2'; worse than anything Danny 'Versatile' Dyer has done, just beyond dreadful. Why did they re-make the original?
Late reply, I know... But a similar situation happened to me when I bought Texas Chainsaw Massacre from Woolies... they put the remake in the box! I had been dodging it up until that point, but like you, I thought "I may as well watch this now". I thought it was a bit crap at the time, but I saw it again years later and didn't think it was that bad. Compared to the current state of remakes and reboots that copy entire scenes and moments from the original films, at least the Chainsaw remake tried to be its own film.
@UlsterWinger Actually, that's true. He does have his moments. He's also excellent in The Gift, and of course, Bill & Ted because of the perfect casting.
director cut actually, my parents had it on dvd. The doctor has a habit of over selling some alternative horror movies and building them up to be a lot scarier than they are.
WHY do they DO this? They remake utterly unique films that simply cannot be remade, someone told me that they re-did Bedazzled and its bloody awful (and sank like a stone), stop it, just STOP.
I wonder if that epilogue exists anywhere online... It was on the release prints, but it was cut from the DVD for some reason. I never saw it in the cinema (partly because of this review), but it would be somewhat interesting to see, I guess.
Someone uploaded it six months ago! m.ruclips.net/video/AOdLdNWNqZI/видео.html I had no idea James Franco was in it! Some people might be upset or get some amusement out of that depending on their disposition. I can see why they cut it, but ironically enough, it's probably the most LaBute-like scene in the entire film.
The reason he says that the film was odd was because people who worked on the film, specifically editors, tried to destroy the film, with many parts of the original shoot/footage were burnt or lost.
heh he nice one Mark, I've never bothered with the remake, mostly because I can't stand Nicholas Cage but also because I love the original, and can't see how any sort of remake could bring anything new to the story.
May the ship lapped and varnished tentacles of the Trumpet Queen sing that holy song, until the mountains of the gong people surrenders it's frozen bounty.
Looks like Kermode really does believe the original Wicker Man directed itself as I found the following in a review of his for the Wicker Tree Robin Hardy's thematic "sequel" to the Wicker Man. "Yet whatever strange magic The Wicker Man possessed, few could deny that its terrifically infernal power was more a result of Anthony Shaffer's "thoroughly nasty" script, Edward Woodward's terrifyingly believable performance and Seamus Flannery's majestically inspired art design than Hardy's weirdly off-kilter auteurial influence." From Mark Kermode's review in The Observer, Sunday 29 April 2012. Since when was it a mistake to apply weird directorial choices to one of the 20th centuries weirdest scripts? As for "off kilter" the urban dictionary definition is "off kilter It means that something's just not right. Off balance. It's not all there. She suddenly started laughing for no reason. She's a bit off kilter.." In other words Kermode believes Robin Hardy's direction was tonally wrong sabotaging the brilliant work of everyone else involved in the film. In conclusion the good Dr has every right to his opinion, but it's a bit much to sit next to a director you despise on the DVD in vision commentary for the 1st UK release of the original Wicker Man when you hold him in contempt! J'accuse Kermode of appalling hypocrisy, the vagueness of his criticism of Robin Hardy is contemptible (he proffers no examples of Hardy's bad directorial choices.) The world of film is littered with 1 hit wonders, but a hits a hit & a shit's a shit; contradicting myself somewhat in the same sentence I like and agree with Kermode's opinions most of the time, I guess nobody's perfect.
@TheEvilelvis89 Absolutely. I forgot about that one. He does have his moments for sure, and I can think of worse actors: Orloondo Bland, Michael Pitt, David Caruso...
Christ this sounds worse than I ever thought. I knew it was bad but the names of Burstyn, Cage and Bates somewhat dampened the blow. Now I know for sure that I will probably never see this film, that is if I don't want my teenage memories of discovering my love for film to be trampled over.
@TulseLuper And, to be honest, if you don't know what happens at the end of the Wicker Man then where have you been living for the last forty years, in a stranded hut in the middle of Antarctica? It's like the ending of Citizen Kane, or The Empire Strikes Back, or Planet of the Apes - a twist so well known it's gone through cultural osmosis and been referenced/parodied in everything from the Simpsons to Garfield. You might as well be complaining about people spoiling the New Testament.
The original is up the with The Shinning for horror films. Nothing to do with gore, jumps n bumps or scary things. Its the fact the policeman is only on the island with no-one to help him. Fucked me up for days after watching it :)
I think remakes could be great things if used correctly. Do what the makers of old exploitation movies used to do. Give the movie to a director who wants to be an artist, and give them parameters to work around. Remakes have the great resource of a guaranteed audience. Give that to someone with talent who needs a start.
The film is a series of scenes where Nicholas Cage punches women in the face, sometimes dressed as a bear. Before being savaged by bees. BBBBEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSS!!!!!
"Oh God! Oh Jesus Christ!". Edward Woodward was brilliant.
Edward Woodward's accent is spot on, the right region too. Many English actors would have done some sort of Glaswegian or even an Edinburgh accent but Woodward hits it right on the head.
The original Wicker Man is a BRILLIANT film. The ending is one of the best denouements of a horror film. It is my favorite horror film besides Picnic at Hanging Rock (early Peter Weir) and The Exorcist (Kermode loves it as well :). I am a yank and when I heard this film was being "remade" starring Nicolas Cage I just started quaking with a combination of rage and terror as I KNEW it would be an abomination. Ugh.
Good choices. Picnic at Hanging Rock is great. The remake has a certain "so-bad-it's-good" quality, but all of the funniest bits happen in the last half hour. Otherwise, Kermode is absolutely right. It's mostly a crashing bore. Cage's character makes no sense and neither does LaBute's feminist allegory. It also doesn't make sense that the film is set in America at all. In Cage's defense, I don't think it's his fault. Not even Daniel Day-Lewis could make a line as stupid as "NOT THE BEES" work.
I thought beginning of the film was where the plane lands at the island.
It wasn’t until I saw a much later edit in which it actually begins on the mainland.
(This makes the film a hell of a lot more understandable as you’re watching it by the way)
3 of my favourite films too, definitely in my top 10 films of the 1970s, maybe of all time.
You have to give Cage at least a little bit of credit for his over-the-top performance. It's like he read the script and thought "Well, there's nothing I can do to make this good. But I CAN make it entertaining."
Isn't that his approach to every film he is in?
He's like that in most films now because he accepts bad roles.
Cage is such a lovely man in real life : )
Haha I'd love it if that was his actual thought process going into this film.
I'm always reminded of a quote, I can't remember by who, I can't remember from where, so I might be slightly paraphrasing: "In good movies, Nicholas Cage is good. In bad movies, he's indispensable."
My favorite comedy of the year.
Simon Mayo piping up with “is it a possessed bicycle?” Will never not make me laugh- he always is the cherry on top of these reviews
Simon Mayo is the unsung hero of the podcast.
This [the remake] is one of the funniest films I've ever seen. I've seen it something like 9 times and I laugh all the way through every time...... It's so damn funny.
These days there are lots of films where there's lots of nodding/winking at the camera and everybody knows what they're doing. Every so often though a film comes along where it's evident that nobody knew what they were doing at all. Whenever I see it's on t.v. I've got to watch it - it's hilarious
:)
Mark Kermode saying "That reminded me of that episode of Start Trek, The Next Generation..." brightened my day.
khamiszcze For a moment I thought I clicked some Red Letter Media review during Kermode's rant. He went full Mike Stoklasa.
That's right Jay.
Mark: "it's like an episode of Star Trek."
Simon: turns directly to camera with dead eyes
No RLM fans read your comment :(
@@Blitterbug one did!
I did too
Oh, this is well beyond Mike Stoklasa. Mark is describing "The Lorelei Signal", an episode of the Star Trek _animated series._ I doubt Mike's even seen it.
@@Thy_Boss We have another winner!
If you watch this movie as a comedy, you'll have a better time!
A group of friends and I played the 'Nicolas cage drinking game' a little while ago; Wicker Man was the first film in the line-up and I was almost paralytic by the end of it.
+Adam Hodgkinson sounds fucking brilliant
it's beyond me why any director would even try to remake the original wicker man. this was doomed to fail before it even began.
Quite. Don't remake classics and make them shit. Remake flawed films and make them great. The latter is more difficult.
Blood on Satan's Claw was on tv the other night.I remember watching that when I was a kid and scaring myself to death. It seemed a bit tamer 30 odd years later but still class.
On the upside, they made a great comedic gem here.
Love when Mark gets so hyper that he reminds me of the scene from "Scanners" where the dude's head explodes!!!
Best part of the review at 6:00 "Ooooor nor! Ooooor nor!"
Very true.
I wish he elaborated on what he thought wong with the original. I love it. It has a very slow creepy atmosphere that seems to be a trademark of British horror films. In the absence of big budget special effects one needs a stronger story of interesting characters. Apart from the human sacrifice aspect I wouldn't mind living on Summerisle. The oundtrack was also pretty good and I have a few songs on my Ipod, such as Gently Johnny (unfortunately sans the Christopher Lee recitation of the Walt Whitman poem) and the very beautiful Corn Rigs. The music is so out of step with the nature of the film but it creates a total and plausible environment of these people living on this island. I don't think many would have the confidence to intentionally sabotage the suspense of their film. If Mark refers to character's inconsistencies I think it just makes them all the more plausible. Humans are seldom consistent and have lapses of reason. It as among my favorite British horror films which include Village of the Damned, Curse of the Werewolf, and Curse (Night) of the Demon. Sadly as the attention span rapidly diminishes these films (or anyone wishing to make something more "old fashion" ) are now an almost extinct species, washed away by the tide of gore and when remade they have to include such effects and jump scares to keep the audience alert and aware.
I'm not sure I could make a case that it's "the best" film I've ever seen, but it's a strong candidate for, not just my favourite "horror" film, but actually my favourite.film. I love every frame of it, and the way the music meshes with Sgt. Howie's experiences of Summerisle is just brilliant. Edward Woodward's performance is pitch-perfect. So often stuck playing cardboard villains, Christopher Lee gives the performance of his career, showing a nuanced character that can be as ironic and knowing as he can be terrifyingly deaf to Howie's pleas. The film is low budget, and it's sometimes obvious that they weren't filming in May, but it loses none of it's charm for that, and the scenery is gorgeous. At turns disturbing and thoughtful, creepy and beautiful, I think The Wicker Man is a gem. I even try to limit watching it to no more than once every couple of years, just so I won't get jaded with it! :-)
I am very forgiving of minor flaws. If it has a good story and good characters little inconsistences get a pass. David Cronenberg shot the Dead Zone in Canada and only bares a passing resemblance to its actual New England setting. Yeah, the praise seems a little over the top. "The Citizen Kane of horror movies?" that seems unjustified. It's very good but there are better horror movies, but can this even be placed in the horror genre. It's not even really supernatural. What might be a proper category? It's low budget and low key aspects certainly work in its favor. Any big special effects (apart from titular Wicker Man) would be wrong and a distraction. This is the distinction between European and American movies. European films are more about the content whereas American movies are as subtle as a mallet to the head. A modern audience would not sit through the original Wicker Man. They'd be bored to death within the first thirty minutes and if they stay till the end they will be absolutely disappointed as well being utterly puzzled and probably angry that their bloodlust was not appeased. It's not The Human Centipede.If I were to compile a list of my favorite horror movies Wicker Man would on it but not very high---not top ten, perhaps top twenty.
GREG FREEMAN Yes, I agree that some of the critical praise has been over the top. It's more of a film that personally resonates - a favourite, if not the favourite. I can defend it critically as a very good film, but I'm not going to hold it up with Citizen Kane.
That a film like Human Centipede exists and has a big enough audience to warrant a couple of sequels is pretty depressing. I'm not in principle against "body horror" or gore, but when I read the synopsis I couldn't detect a hint of _anything_ besides a drawn out sadistic yuck-fest. No attempt to create a story, or even build suspense, just the kind of thing that, if it fails to make you sick, may succeed in making you fall asleep.
Thankfully, films like _Let the Right One In_ still get made, too. (Another fine film that _just had_ to have a pointless American remake, come to think of it.)
By the way, I didn't mention that, when I'm talking about the original Wicker Man, I'm talking about the Director's Cut version. This was the first version I saw, as I was pretty late coming to this film (I saw it on, if I remember, channel 4 some years ago, and it was introduced by none other than Mark Kermode). When I later saw the shorter theatrical release (if memory serves, it's around 15 minutes shorter) I didn't like it as much - the pace felt all wrong to me, Howie is apparently on the island for just one night, and there are some thematically important scenes moved and/or cut down, like the scenes with Howie in the church early in the film. I realise there's a case to be made for the shorter version being more streamlined or whatever, but I thought I'd point out which version I was talking about, as I much prefer the DC.
I am assuming that it was the full version I saw as well. I'd need examples of scenes that were cut out to compare to the version I recorded close to twenty years ago. All the songs and nudity is tthere. I was late in "discovering" Mark Kermode but it has only been four years since I have been with a computer. When I saw his rants about the Sex and the City movies and Little Man I was an instant fan. I have never heard a critic aim his hostility at the fans who by ways of buying tickets to these celluliod abominations are perpetuating this trash and ought to be ashamed of themselves. I loved it. Lately I've been disappointed in the movies he's been praising and have since drifted away from him. I occassionally peek in on his RUclips page. I am glad that I am not alone in thinking Quentin Taratino is a hack and his constant bashing of Michael Bay is awesome. Mediocrity must be stamped out but, alas, our numbers are few in comparison to those who eat this stuff up with a big spoon. I don't mind genre movies if they have any sort of imagination but louder and dumber seems to be the prevailing mantra. At the 3D craze has died down a little. I hope European movies are better because over here it's pretty much just trash that will be forgotten within a short span of time. No more timeless classics,
He has a handful of solid films: Leaving Las Vegas, Adaptation, Raising Arizona, Wild at Heart, Bringing Out the Dead, Matchstick Men. Recently, he gave a terrific performance in Werner Herzog's remake of Bad Lieutenant. Yeah, he's done a lot of garbage, but I don't like to write him off completely. And at least when he's bad, he's interesting whereas Keanu Reeves is just a plank.
I love both, for different reasons. The original is rightly considered a horror classic and the remake combines its bizarre scripting decisions and insane scenery-chewing performances with just enough unerlying cinematic competence that it's a very fun and memorable ride in its own way.
Both have earned their places in pop culture history imo.
Ahhhhh The B's, not the B's.
An Asian student who doesn't get A+
Hilarious film. The most I've ever laughed, honestly.
About the original Wicker Man: there is nothing, nothing, nothing scarier than Christopher Lee prancing around a fire with long hair. Trust me.
RIP Edward Woodward, a man whose name he said sounded like someone farting in the bath.
Mark Kermode is spot on with this review, the 1973 original is superb, were's this 2006 remake is a mere importer by comparison... It just shows that the major Hollywood studios are running out of ideas, so have to resort to 'rebooting' great classic films...
If you view the movie as a comedy its amazing, nick cage punching a woman while in a bear costume is just insane
@TulseLuper "The Gift" is perhaps the only movie where Keanu Reeves actually comes off as genuinely menacing. Sam Raimi deserves HUGE credit for getting that performance out of him.
The original wicker man is a fantastic film, I'm so lucky I saw it when I was a kid on night late BBC before the awful remake managed to ruin it for me.
On moviedrome with Alex Cox introducing it by any chance?
Remake was absolute pants
Mardenski P Filthy, smelly pants at that
+6wm Filthy, smelly poop stained pants at that.
Mardenski P More like a pair of pants with a big fat turd in the middle of it, weighing it down.
💩
It's great shlock
"ooga booga land"
great stuff
:)
Not since Rollerball has a remake been such an insult to an original masterpiece.
How come he didn't mentioned the bear suit scene?
It's indescribable
Critics didn't give the remake any thought when it first came out. I first heard about the bear suit scene on an IMDb message board. It wasn't until the DVD came out with the "NOT THE BEES" alternate ending that people discovered what a turkey it is. The last 25 minutes are hysterical.
Lol love kermode's Ohh Nooooooo ohhhh nooooo's ha ha
American remake was so far removed from Paganism that it came across as silly. Paganism is dualistic. Women wouldn't be incharge.
@mcfarlanerd
Actually my personal favourite is just before that with the exposition par excellence of :
"THIS IS MURDER! MURDER! YOU'LL ALL BE GUILTY! AND YOU'RE DOING IT FOR NOTHING!"
Why the fuck did they remake 'the wicker man' - one of the best films there is
"Oooh noooh!"
always thought the strength of origenal wicker man was like that of give me shelter in that theres a feeling of forboding and unease that seems to exude through out the whole film rather than any one seen.... made around the same time as well come to think of it
I'd watch this just for that line! Its on Netflix I
"I doubt it... seeing as you're all raving mad."
There have been some staggeringly bad American remakes of classic British films, but this one takes the fondant fancy. I'm convinced it was revenge for us producing Shakin' Stevens as a retort to Elvis.
@JamesOhGoodie Well remember, "Not the Bees" is part of the alternate ending that is only avaliable on DVD. I saw the film in theatres for a laugh and it cut that whole scene out, opting to have "Killing me won't bring back your goddamn honey" in voiceover.
The bear scene. My god. Makes me laugh out loud.
Epic.
Recipe' for the U.S. remake:
Take out everything that made the original special- the religious conflict, the music, the sexiness, the humor.
Make it about a guilt-haunted man vs. Amish Wiccan Feminazis.
HOW COULD THAT LOSE???
They always take out the sex and blood and F words so it can be sold to China
@clockworkscott All I know is that he's with Andy Serkis there. As he's taking a bow, I always use it as the final photo in these.
I loved the wicker man. One of the funniest films i have ever seen
He should have recommended it for the camp value. There's nothing better than an unintentionally hilarious film.
I took the DVD case for 'The Wicker Man' up to the counter in Woolies back in about 2007, having seen it many years earlier and eager to finally own it. I didn't really pay much attention as I'd assumed the teenager at the counter knew what she was doing. Took it home, slid it in the machine and watched it begin to unfold. I knew immediately what she'd done before the menu screen came up, she'd put the wrong bloody film in the box. I thought, sod it, I'll watch it anyway - awful, just awful. Worse than 'Basic Instinct 2'; worse than anything Danny 'Versatile' Dyer has done, just beyond dreadful. Why did they re-make the original?
Late reply, I know... But a similar situation happened to me when I bought Texas Chainsaw Massacre from Woolies... they put the remake in the box! I had been dodging it up until that point, but like you, I thought "I may as well watch this now". I thought it was a bit crap at the time, but I saw it again years later and didn't think it was that bad. Compared to the current state of remakes and reboots that copy entire scenes and moments from the original films, at least the Chainsaw remake tried to be its own film.
@UlsterWinger Actually, that's true. He does have his moments. He's also excellent in The Gift, and of course, Bill & Ted because of the perfect casting.
Mephitic is not the word he wants. He possibly wants Mephistophelean. But who knows? I'm just an American borrowing English from England.
I like him in 'The Devil's Advocate' and 'A Scanner Darkly' too
director cut actually, my parents had it on dvd. The doctor has a habit of over selling some alternative horror movies and building them up to be a lot scarier than they are.
The original is genuinely unsettling, if you don't know the premise. Bit shonky by today's standards but seeing it as a teenager was pretty freaky.
i saw that clip over and over again and nearly died laughing... someone should put piano music on the clip and just loop it over and over again :)
Im surprised that america haven't done a remake of The birds!
This is the final part of the kermode trilogy with mama mia and sex and the city 2
WHY do they DO this? They remake utterly unique films that simply cannot be remade, someone told me that they re-did Bedazzled and its bloody awful (and sank like a stone), stop it, just STOP.
I agree completley
Although the remake of Bedazzle made a profit of $61 million; I'm not sure that counts as sinking like a stone...
Get Carter anyone?
Pure sacrilege to remake along with the Wicker Man 😬
Have never agreed more with a Kermode Review. Hugely disappointed.
When I saw that picture at the end I thought Mark Kermode was three foot.
Correction: it's a body double from behind. She was pregnant at the time. It is not a body double from the waist up, that's all her ;)
wow, I've only seen the "not the bees" ending. I didn't know there was another one
I wonder if that epilogue exists anywhere online... It was on the release prints, but it was cut from the DVD for some reason. I never saw it in the cinema (partly because of this review), but it would be somewhat interesting to see, I guess.
Someone uploaded it six months ago!
m.ruclips.net/video/AOdLdNWNqZI/видео.html
I had no idea James Franco was in it! Some people might be upset or get some amusement out of that depending on their disposition.
I can see why they cut it, but ironically enough, it's probably the most LaBute-like scene in the entire film.
"its all for honey you bitches!!"
The reason he says that the film was odd was because people who worked on the film, specifically editors, tried to destroy the film, with many parts of the original shoot/footage were burnt or lost.
I love Kermode's bad reviews
I want Nicolas Cage going OH NO! As my ringtone.
Its worth watching this film just to see the ridiculous spectacle of Nicholas Cage punching an old lady in the face while wearing a bear costume.
You didn't hate it enough Mark. C'mon, I thought you were a fan of the masterful original.
You dont watch this film as a horror, you watch this as a comedy
fair enough. I agree that the film isn't that scary. But I still really like it
How has it been ruined, the original still exisists .
heh he nice one Mark, I've never bothered with the remake, mostly because I can't stand Nicholas Cage but also because I love the original, and can't see how any sort of remake could bring anything new to the story.
May the ship lapped and varnished tentacles of the Trumpet Queen sing that holy song, until the mountains of the gong people surrenders it's frozen bounty.
The original is exactly that ORIGINAL. It is a folk horror musical brilliantly made
Looks like Kermode really does believe the original Wicker Man directed itself as I found the following in a review of his for the Wicker Tree Robin Hardy's thematic "sequel" to the Wicker Man. "Yet whatever strange magic The Wicker Man possessed, few could deny that its terrifically infernal power was more a result of Anthony Shaffer's "thoroughly nasty" script, Edward Woodward's terrifyingly believable performance and Seamus Flannery's majestically inspired art design than Hardy's weirdly off-kilter auteurial influence." From Mark Kermode's review in The Observer, Sunday 29 April 2012.
Since when was it a mistake to apply weird directorial choices to one of the 20th centuries weirdest scripts?
As for "off kilter" the urban dictionary definition is "off kilter
It means that something's just not right. Off balance. It's not all there.
She suddenly started laughing for no reason. She's a bit off kilter.."
In other words Kermode believes Robin Hardy's direction was tonally wrong sabotaging the brilliant work of everyone else involved in the film.
In conclusion the good Dr has every right to his opinion, but it's a bit much to sit next to a director you despise on the DVD in vision commentary for the 1st UK release of the original Wicker Man when you hold him in contempt!
J'accuse Kermode of appalling hypocrisy, the vagueness of his criticism of Robin Hardy is contemptible (he proffers no examples of Hardy's bad directorial choices.) The world of film is littered with 1 hit wonders, but a hits a hit & a shit's a shit; contradicting myself somewhat in the same sentence I like and agree with Kermode's opinions most of the time, I guess nobody's perfect.
I love ya Mark, but the best line in that movie is *deep breath* NOT THE BEES!!!
I'm in total agreement with Mark Kermode about The Wicker Man remake.
Watch the original - feel the dread of that ;)
@TheEvilelvis89 Absolutely. I forgot about that one. He does have his moments for sure, and I can think of worse actors: Orloondo Bland, Michael Pitt, David Caruso...
Any chance we can relaunch 'Take the High Road' with Nic Cage?
"OOH NOO!"
Christ this sounds worse than I ever thought. I knew it was bad but the names of Burstyn, Cage and Bates somewhat dampened the blow. Now I know for sure that I will probably never see this film, that is if I don't want my teenage memories of discovering my love for film to be trampled over.
nicolas cage isn't a chameleon. he acts the same in each movie.
@TulseLuper
And, to be honest, if you don't know what happens at the end of the Wicker Man then where have you been living for the last forty years, in a stranded hut in the middle of Antarctica? It's like the ending of Citizen Kane, or The Empire Strikes Back, or Planet of the Apes - a twist so well known it's gone through cultural osmosis and been referenced/parodied in everything from the Simpsons to Garfield. You might as well be complaining about people spoiling the New Testament.
HOW DID IT GET BURNT!
I like that Mr. Kermode noticed that they so butchered the setup and execution of the end of the remake that they had to add a shitty denouement.
just watched the original really no where near as frightening as mark made it out to be
The original is up the with The Shinning for horror films. Nothing to do with gore, jumps n bumps or scary things. Its the fact the policeman is only on the island with no-one to help him. Fucked me up for days after watching it :)
which version did you see? director's cut or butchered theatrical version?
Very broadly. He says that there is a confrontation with the wicker man but not much else.
"Not the bees!"
NO NOT THE KERMODE....NOT THE KERMODE......NOT THE KERMOOOOOOOOOOODDDDDEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!
What? They use a Wicker Man at the end of the remake? I was expecting a cage..
I'm surprised he didn't mention the bearsuit or sidekicking teenage girls.
Isn’t Neil LaBute a playwright also?
Original was weird, brilliant and exciting with fab music but not in the least frightening
I think remakes could be great things if used correctly. Do what the makers of old exploitation movies used to do. Give the movie to a director who wants to be an artist, and give them parameters to work around. Remakes have the great resource of a guaranteed audience. Give that to someone with talent who needs a start.
NOT THE BEES!
Yes!
The ONLY film I ever walked out of while watching.
Until the end i wasnt sure whether the movie was meant to be a comedy.
NOT THE BEES!!!
Best bit is when Nic' punches some woman in the face lol
Not the bees!
Let's hope they never remake Blood on Satan's Claw or Witchfinder General. The remake of The Wicker man was simply cack.
The film is a series of scenes where Nicholas Cage punches women in the face, sometimes dressed as a bear. Before being savaged by bees. BBBBEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSS!!!!!