Local Neckbeard Loses his Mind over Mild Rainbow Capitalist Ad
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- Опубликовано: 17 окт 2024
- Thumbnail "Corn King" art done by Emperor Neuro
emperorneuro.newgrounds.com
Twitter - @popculturejoke
Intro "Maizelbub" art by Dan Rossi
danrossidraws.com
Twitter - @danrossidraws
Catch all my streams LIVE at / actualjake
#Politics #Debate #Twitch
My fiance has JUST started to feel brave enough to transition and used the pandemic as an opportunity to grow her hair out from a crew cut. The unbridled joy every time she gushed to me about her long, curly hair should never be ruined by guys like this claiming she's confused or coached or whatever. No, she's Katie.
I am so happy for both of you. Beacuse of Jake and Hanah, I started to talk to trans people, turns out I am Enby. I do not like being male as gender, you can be manly but I find it kind of boring and gross. It is nice not having a gender. I have never acted manly or macho because it is uncomfortable, I am a guy who is not comfortable being manly. People just want to be happy Dave, we are just happy people.
Okay not me crying at this comment at 9:45 am PST 😭😭😭 Trans rights forever 🏳️⚧️ (sincerely, a newly-out enby)
you're all such cuties; thank you for being amazing, Mandy. I've been on estrogen for like a year now, and it's been lifechanging. Good luck to both of you!
Yes! The pandemic has been my springboard to transition, as well. I feel more like myself than I have in 15 years and I finally feel like I'm allowed to be happy. People like Dave may try but they can't take that away now.
Eww curly hair
He does generally seem allergic to happiness.
Clinically depressed I think.
He thinks showing enthusiasm or showing that you like things too much is girly and weak
No... just other people’s happiness.
That how you know your real man 🤣
Real men are only ever allowed to be angry, I guess. They definitely think fun is for betas.
Breaking: shampoo company wants people with long hair to buy their product.
Dave is mad beacuse a company wants money... he wants companies not to be driven by capital. He is a spy destroying capitalism from within by making it look stupid.
🌈👍
Dave has a good point, angry cis het men are already the peak shampoo market
Everyone knows gays hate soap
@@andrewfranquelin3184 As a gay man that apparently does not pass as gay very well but has been called an F slur for making soap I stan this comment.
@@andrewfranquelin3184 Looking at Daves hair I don't think a shampoo has touched that once
Curious that a guy who's literally never showered is mad about a shampoo commercial
The saying is that a stopped clock is right twice a day, but he manages to not even clear that low bar, even with a dozen clocks.
Jack has won the comments, everyone else go home
@@BenAdairNI Boom
🤣🤣🤣👏👏 Fucking awesome
Got em
Cringe clock king has somehow never had a stopped clock moment
He's totally missing that the "love" in this case is not about the girl's hypothetical date or whatever she's getting ready for. It's the love of her MOM for her. Her mom recognizes her for who she is, and thus the girl feels loved and valued, for herself. It's the least sexual message possible. WTF is wrong with neckbeard's brain?
Yea idk why he brought up sexual attraction. Feeling loved doesn't have anything to do sex and sexuality
Dave's brain can't get any oxygen because his arteries are full of grease and coom
I'm not even sure what has to happen for your brain to be destroyed like this.
@@fleecejohnson9813 And cheese
@@JackgarPrime and mayonnaise
Actually had a discussion with Dave he didn't know Puerto Ricans are American. It was on the geek room
Nor did the last President tbf.
@@Robin-jk6wz fair
Yeah, sounds like our boy Dave.
"Hair means nothing" I believe Dave is quoting the top of his near-bald head with this one.
Big Dave's voice reminds me of Master Shake with a traumatic brain injury
stroke
Eat the Broodwich.
@@SLAUGHTERAMA eat the gloopwich
Now i'm not one to judge, but if there ever was a poster child for the local neckbeard... it would be that guy.
For 7 years they’ve been saying it is a woke minority while support has been growing at a rapid pace
Anti-LGBT has rapidly become a minority opinion, and that makes me happy. I just wish those voices weren't coming from some of the most powerful people
it drives me nuts when ppl say "coaching" when it comes to LGBTQ but never when its cishet. like to them letting someone express themselves is coaching but conversion therapy ect is fine.
They're "helping" them live a good life /s. If I could eye roll any harder because of torture they call "help", they'd disconnect. It makes me sick, it needs to stop
They are just hypocritical weirdos. I'm a cis male and I have defended day rights and been called gay for doing so. For some reason defending peoples right to love the same sex makes them think no you are secretly gay. It's like they have no concept of compassion.
"Half-Amish"? So does he only use the computer 12 hours a day?
He thinks Amish is an ethnicity. 😂
He's not a conservative, he just shares all their views and opinions. Also, look at him, he's mad because it's shampoo, he's terrified of bathing.
And even if someone loses fertility from some form of hormone blocking or replacement, that's not the end of the world? There's untold numbers of children around the world who could use parents who really, really want to share the love they have to give. I'm cis but I have PCOS and other health issues some of which are genetic. Even without HRT I have no business having kids. It's sad but life goes on! I'd rather trans youth be on hormone modifying meds than lose them to what happens to kids who can't even attempt to transition.
The "spitting" dinosaur from Jurassic Park is named Dilophosaurus.
Stan Winston's team only gave it a Frilled Lizard's cowl to distinguish it from the film's Velociraptors. While it's Spitting Cobra-esque projectile venom is a whole-cloth invention of Micheal Crichton's original novel.
The real Dilophosaurus was feathered and far larger than it's film depiction. If the Dilophosaurus and Velociraptors of Jurassic Park were to switch sizes; they would be accurate to their real life counterparts.
Neat.
I read this whole comment.
Velociraptors were the size of turkeys.
No one can convince me that the one dislike currently on the video isnt from dave
That’s the lord of patriarchy to you.
I mean he clearly hasn't used shampoo in what I can only assume is his lifetime...
god this is probably the hardest Dave video to watch not just to see him painfully misunderstand hormone blockers (which have literally been used on cis kids for decades with few side effects)/transitioning but also seeing him misgender and be weirdly sexual about this little girl and her family
"and that boy is in for a real surprise"
Okay that line genuinely terrifies me because trans panic is a viable defense in some states. This girl could be *murdered* by someone and clock king would be fine as long as the *murderer* said "oh I was shocked cause she had a peepee." Absolutely disgusting
My parents tried very hard to make me a cishet girl. But guess what? I'm still NB and queer.
Bro same
Same fam
And you are cool and valid, en-pals.
Someone broke in and stole his moscow clock and his mustache. The culprit was probably the white rabbit from alice in wonderland.
This guy needs to lay off the gloop. I think all that gloop he's cooking, along with the 20 beers he claws is messing with his cortisol levels.
Dave is mad because the idea of using shampoo offends him.
They're not saying long hair makes a woman, but hair DOES tend to be important to many women. Amazing how some people can just be so full of themselves that some VERY simple thoughts or values other people may have are so beyond them.....
Also, at that age, hair length and clothing style are the only visual differences between the average boy and the average girl. If you wear pink and have a long hair, people will see you as a girl, and in this case that's a success.
Dave needs to find a good therapist. He's so angry.
Sometimes I'm purposefully obtuse for a joke and this infuriates me so much that I never wanna do it ever again
These videos actually give me a sort of nostalgic feeling believe it or not. Growing up there was only one mountain where I grew up in Florida and that was Coors Mountain! What my little sister and I called the very large pile of empty Coors light cans on the empty side lot
This guy is the epitome of “Misery loves company.”
The first time I got my haircut (I’m trans FTM) I was so happy. It made me upset that the people cutting my hair refused to make it masculine, but I was still happy. The second I got a buz cut and I looked like a masculine guy with my binder and my baggy hoodie, everyone, and I mean EVERYONE, saw me. They really SAW ME! Calling me “sir” and using the right pronouns. I wish they could have seen me as who I am earlier, but better late than never.
I’m very happy now :))
I'm sorry, you can't give medical advice IF YOU CAN'T EVEN UNDERSTAND TIME ZONES.
Maybe it’s coaching. Maybe it’s Maybeline.
his ignorance is terrifying.
Thanks Jake, I feel much better about my own breathing when recording now.
Imagine being Dave and ‘cringing’ when he reads ‘giving unconditional love to your kid regardless of their identity’ 😢
I remember this guy. He is the same as he ever was.
Why doesn't the dude shave his head? When I started getting predator head I just shaved it all off. Hats off to him for trying to get the predator head thing going I guess.
I'm more concerned with whatever the hell is going on with his mustache. Brother needs to take some biotin.
@@Mike-zx6sl maybe he's going for the klingon look.
@@GoalieShmew Yeah, I was going to say, if he wasn't a complete toolbag, it's not a _worse_ look.
... Though that might just be because he's not exactly attractive. There's a large field of, "well, I'm not repulsed." to me when someone is just 'normal' looking.
If he was a good person I wouldn’t care but he’s out here telling other people how to look: and if they aren’t up to his standard they’re trash.
@Hyperion 666 only hockey players can get away with that. Google Al Iafrate hair.
The shaved mustache is what makes him half Amish
Just how pervasive is this "it's the parents making the kid do this" myth anyway?
It's extremely common to the point it's been used in legislation and legal battles
It’s standard discourse for them. No non-cis kid understands their body, so you better wait until they’re grown to apply those puberty blockers.
Sorta speaks to their attitude on child raising. Fuck what’s good for the kid if it makes them uncomfortable. You can do what your conservative dad wants or get kicked out. Happens all the time.
me singing to dave:
🎵 You're insecure🎵
🎵I know what for🎵
He doesn't seem to understand that 2 moms = double the chicken nuggies
Dave fundamentally doesn't understand what hormone blockers do. Honestly, I don't think Dave understands much.
He doesn't understand what seasoning is. I don't think he knows anything.
imagine being a claw-er in chat😳😳
Wait, what? How can you be "half Amish"? Amish isn't an ethnicity, it's a religious culture. Saying you're "half Amish" is like saying you're "half Puritan", "half Shinto", or "half Buddhist".
"This transgender day of visibility, let me stop you right there..."
The dread of getting cisplained approaches.
“Is this dementia?”
It's like undoomed, except I'm not sure which is worse: Undoomed's willful misunderstanding the topic or Cringe King genuinely not getting it and lashing out because he doesn't get it
Me: I love chocolate
Lord of patriarchy: and if it's covered in shit do you still love it? Huh? Owned.
Okay this was pretty funny
This guy is a content goldmine
Why do these people even care abt ads lol
Oh God, he lives.
I wonder about the claw hand thing. I sometimes do similar because I have some fairly profound ADHDs which sometimes bring along with them this weird sensory interaction with one's body. E.g., twisting my hand funny feels better.
I wonder if he has neurological issues of a similar nature.
Slurp-a the Hutt, yay
Dave wishes he could have transitioned before puberty. Classic projection.
He looks like Gazpacho and sounds like Iago
Dave really puts effort into saying something disgusting about this family.
Maybe Dave should stick to yelling at food.
I was like 10 seeing brittany spears dancing, man it went all dirty down from there lol. Kids know
First, I think Dave is conflating feeling good about how you look and presentation with actual sexual attraction. That is REALLY weird and very i-wordy. Second, WHY DOES HE CARE?!? I sincerely doubt he uses anything but the 99-cent bottle of suave strawberry shampoo. He ain't buyin' Pantene anyway.
he cares because hes a cruel and bitter man who takes pleasure in spreading misery
I used to be similar
@@CaptainPrincess at least you changed
That's good
I'd hope Dave will one day,but I doubt it
@@carybeweary7209 likely the point at which dave wouldve changed has long passed
@@CaptainPrincess perhaps he'll sing the I Can Change Saddam Hussein song from South Park🤣🤣🤣
Engagement.
Thank god you came back to the Lord of Cringe, Jake! I prayed god would inspire your spirit to cover Dave
Dave literally cannot parse the contextual meaning of words. Are we sure this man isn't a shitty AI? He just picks the top dictionary definition or something.
Sometimes he just picks the first few words of the top definition. Reading something completely is too much work, apparently.
Dave looks like he makes 6 boxes of KD at a time
Kill/death ratio? Ohhh, Kraft Dinner!
I make 6 boxes at a time. But that's cause i live with 6 people.
With doritos and mayonnaise
27:43 - Orrrr that boy gets exactly what he was looking for. A beautiful trans woman.
And what if that trans girl is lesbian or ace?
Oh right, he thinks those aren't real.
He, like most of his ilk, dislikes the rainbow part since the rainbow part is against the Conservative core value of the Superior/Interior dynamic. Non-white, non-straight, and non-male are in their world -view inferior, which makes them superior. If society treats them well then they're no longer inferior and they, by contrast, are no longer superior.
See the history of Conservatism. The core of it was that the nobles should have power as they were superior to the commoners. The only thing that has changed about that is the words used, it's now maker vs takers and etc.
You could look at this the other way, Dave is already half-way there. He understands that hair doesn't make someone a man or woman, so just build on from there until he realizes that practically nothing makes someone a man or woman, except for how you identify.
*russian hockey player voice*
Is-is only trans ppl. Why you heff to be mad?
Ilya Bryzgalov haha
I'm not convinced Dave has much of an audience outside of people who hate him.
A single dislike... I wonder from who?
I've been watching Jake's dave vids alot recently and I feel dave is living in a world that's left him behind. I feel he has arrested development (I term I use way too often even on myself). It feels like hes stuck in his late teens- early 20s period. Where he felt his life was going to turn out like how he imagined it would in his head. But it never did and hes grown bitter with life as it went on. I also think he has a bad relationship with his mother wich would explain the anger towards women. I think jake and sarah have broken the code on dave behavior but I feel at this point theres no going back. Hes made up his mind on how he sees the world and hes going to keep living in it until the real world matches his reality. In the mean time we can watch people make fun of his cooking videos hahaha!!
Dave clearly thinks there would have to be coaching because he probably grew up in a cishet family that pushed its desires and gender roles onto him which, if so, probably explains why he is the way he is
Dave has no idea how capitalism works, does he?
he has no idea about a lot of things
He can't even figure out clocks
This man needs help. I don't get the deal with the clocks. Also, is he saying attraction equals sexuality? Did he say he was half Amish?
14:11 I wasn't paying attention, to busy paying attention to the guy.
35:51 I mean, what this girl and her moms go through later in life, they'll deal with it in due time and not necessarily have an identity crisis like this guy wants.
Lol. Cringe talking about love and sex, two things he has never experienced.
What's the deal with the corn suit?
Running gag.
Like iilluminaughtii with the avatar.
Dave's vids and eating food don't go together! 🤢🤢🤢
Actual Jake, do you regret the comments you made about male feminists on that other video you made at all? You shouldn't be perpetuating right wing sexist stereotypes
Maybe if you bully Dr. Squatch enough I won't have to watch his fucking obnoxious soap adds anymore.
I click on Jake's videos because he covers things I'm interested in, but then he rambles and goes on so many tangents. Dude, this 40-minute video could've been like 20 minutes.