Today is my first day as i got out of an addictive relationship...he has adhd, we lived together for 2 years, he moved to other country to be with me , with his dog. it was the best and the worst period of my life. tnx for this video cuz i need to know that im not alone and that i will be happy again.
You’ve described my relationship with the ex narcissist wife. Thank God I pulled out of that evil cycle 3 years ago and healed from the emotional abuse.
I became addicted to her. I was in such a trance the way i would look at her was so intence. She would even say comments about the way i looked at her. I even told her i was adicted to her like drugs. I have never been so hooked on anyone like her. I put her on a pedistal too i didnt even know who i was anymore. After i told her goodbye i shook for days i cryed it was misery it took months to let her go. I feel stupid now for acting that way i couldn't control it. She was my pic on my phone and i would constantly pick up my phone to look at her picture to get my fix.. I lost myself in this relationship was amazing for so long.... I wish i would of been normal with her. She was good to me.... I got on her ig and she has a new man . it hurts still.
Hi Ashley, honestly I guess I have kind of always known (subconsciously) that I was in a toxic relationship but I realize now that I needed to hear the signs out loud. Now that I actually have, I intend on learning as much as my brain can possibly take because I have been dealing with this problem for quite some time now and honestly speaking I have kind of been in denial cause the relationship I was addicted to didn't last very long and it has been over a year now since the break-up and I still find myself recalling the little glimpses of joy when all my decisions were based on infatuation. I am a 19-year teenager, with this being said, I didn't really see myself as a potential in the category of the romantically addicted...Now that I do, I appreciate you and all the work you do to help us damaged souls out here. May you have a blessed and prosperous life filled with joy, peace and love. THANK YOU!
Great video thank you! I was in a relationship with someone with bpd and it was addictive because of the love bombing until we got married...now on our separate ways. Tried to help by focusing on self but get blamed for everything. She needs to heal on her own. Truly pray that she does! 🙏🏽
I so needed to hear this. Thank you. My question is, how do you get OUT of a addictive relationship; when you leave & the other person starts stalking, harrasing, making friendships with family, ******* your friends, calling your work??
I do not want this video to create guilt or a guilty feeling. Guilt is an empty emotion, delve past that feeling and realize when we are addicted to a relationship we lose ourself. You, yourself, wants to be known by you, that relationship is diverting your attention from what is truly important.
I think you are AMAZING... 6 YEARS. I can see light when I listen to you.👏💔💓 Let my journey begin on finally letting go. My life needs to begin. God help me...
Don’t visit your dealers house.... what if it’s your estranged husband... I’m addicted to him... it’s toxic. I want to walk away (I’m actively preparing walk away, starting divorce process) he treats me terribly. I’m addicted to being with him, sex with him, the DRAMA. I have to leave. We have 2 daughters (one a newborn). My internal push to be a good mom is what drives me to leave. Deep down, I wish I could stay. It feels so good at times (like a high).... but the lows are devastating... I need off this ride, but what a ride. I reminisce (probably a rose colored version of the past) but as I’m preparing to leave I’m feeling intense grief. All I do is cry at night... I hope this next vid is helpful. It takes strength to walk away. It seems at times easier to stay. Pray my strength
I am getting out of an addictive relationship and the only thing that truly saved me in a way was a big devastating fight in which ended the relationship completely. There is one fundamental kye that I think can often save a person in these situations and that is another person moving on with somebody else and it's hard to understand that at first but it's better because then you'll be back in the same cycle. That is what saved me in my addictive relationship with the partner that I was with.
I've been clean and sober for 29 years. I keep getting involved in these types of relationships and at one time I was going to CODA. Unfortunately, where I live doesn't have them or even ALANON. I just broke it off with my ex for my own self preservation. Your video spoke volumes to me. I'm having a migraine, I need to get my head straight and although I understand her problems, it's like being on a Roller Coaster! I don't have any tattoos on me that say Duncan because I'm not a freakin Yo Yo! Thanks helping me get focused Ma'am. 😊❤️🙏💯
I think trust in a relationship is overrated. When my husband started getting frequent night calls , i would ask and he would just wave off those calls as unimportant. At a time i could take no more of his lies, I decided i deserve to know what was going on. A friend of mine referred me to this great ethical hacking team( Cyberhackingsage@gmail ) who helped clone his cellphone without having to touch the device. My husband was a cheating Narcissist and I’m glad i found out all his secrets and infidelity and how he planned on using this pandemic to get back to me. I got access to his Facebook, iMessage, GPS location , WhatsApp, Call Logs and Text Messages (both deleted and incoming ones) with a remote link to a programmed App on my phone. I’m here in Florida and able to access my husband’s phone even while he was away in Canada cheating on me. Thanks to Cyberhackingsage, now i have enough evidence for my divorce. If you need help or that little bit of closure, i advice you get in touch with them Via Gmail ( cyberhackingsage@gmail )Or Text and WhatsApp them on +15713758467...thank me later.
I need to stop this cycle in my life. I thought I had healed & grown. Yet now I find myself in a bad relationship again. I went through counseling but found the constant rehashing not to be helpful. I want the HOW to move past these issues.
The update:: I'm not in a bad relationship but we do go through really bad moments. 2020 has tested us hard! That has tried our patience with each other but we have grown so much through the storm. I'm grateful I didn't jump ship in the middle of the hurricane.
I was abused by my cousins physically as a kid, and I didn’t have any friends. And a girl came into my life and started treating me worse, she flirted with me and we did stuff even though she had a boyfriend, and then she accused me of rape. When she started it, and then she distanced herself, then she came back into my life like a hurricane 4 months later, and it only got worse. It got physical, she tried to kill me a few times and I still have an addiction toward the way she treated me. It felt familiar, and scary. And it felt like I deserved it, and once I separated myself from her I realized I deserved better, but I still find myself wanting what she did to me, even tho it caused me a lot of emotional pain. Well emotional and physical
Thank you so much for this video, it changed me life! I’ve been in this exact situation for 6+ years and it finally dawned on me: All of my knowledge of addictions were only chemical based. But once I stepped back and looked at my cycles (self empowerment>divorce>guilt>relapse>guilt>self loathing, so on and so fourth) I realized that this whole situation has addiction written all over it. My biggest Achilles heel in all of this being our two children. So cutting off contact has been next to impossible. We have to talk, and see each other. every time these things happen, that door is left open, and eventually I walk back through it into the addiction or relationship. How do I navigate this?
I got into this dynamic...8years and a daughter...we started in a triangle and it never got better...it was my whole life ..eventually he started to destroy me..one month and 14days free ..it hurts so badly but staying hurt way worse
This podcast changed the entire way I looked at the shitty relationship I was in. I realized that I was not thinking about anything else except this person. I became obsessed and I am a strong woman so it was out of character for me. I only dated him 3 months. I started to have anxiety& get diarrhea. He would drink and tell me what I wanted to hear and act like I was crazy when I’d bring it up to him. This podcast woke me up. I am way too good for this type of bullshit. I sent it to many other woman and I hope it helps them as well.
Thank you Ashley Top notch content. And definitely something that I have been trying to get to the bottom of with myself. How do you heal this addiction?
Very thanks to this video, Im in this kind of relationship, always fight always accusing cheating even if not, now always threatening me, im very stress now dont know how to exit bout this kinda of relationship
I just had a brain wave then. When you lower your self esteem what you do is you devalue yourself in the eyes of the beholder (being the person you want to be with) and when you look like you are desperate for the attention, for the validation - they know they can walk all over you, because when you get to that please don't leave me part you become needy in the eyes of the other person and you loose value. To regain value again is to work on yourself, your self worth and get it back otherwise people think that they can treat you with a lack of respect and without it makes for a miserable marriage or partnership so yes, work on yourself. Get your attractive qualities back or that person wouldn't have pursued you in the beginning and if you are in a controlling relationship with someone that is when they know they have complete control over you. Your giving them control!! If he or she is a manipulator anyway they will see it in your behaviours. Knowing your self value and worth increases the chances of getting them to want you again but it's not about just getting them to want you, that will just give them a massive ego boost, it's about doing it for you to project forward, not for them!!! You help me gain clarity and answers every day.
It felt all consuming with the X yet never fulfilling or satisfying, it always felt " off " from the start. It did feel like an addiction trying to make it work 😵 it felt like climbing Mt. Everest 😓 but never reaching the top
I am in the beginning of trying to get away from my boyfriend, this describes our relationship to a T..... And above all else I think the hardest part is the sadness and heartache. The heartache over thinking this was the love of my life and now I'm thinking I don't even know who this person is. :(
Im still addicted to her, and she has cheated and mentally abused me. I just got out of the Psychward TONIGHT and she staryed texting me and i cant help but forgive her. Even after watching this i dont thjnk i can change. I want her to leave me for good but she wont. What do I do?
I've been in an addictive relationship for a year now, it started getting addicted during quarantine due to her bipolar making her distance and fuck me did i chase her attention, it's been killing me for months. I kept saying deep down i don't love this girl so why do i need her? The main addiction came through texts, she would sometimes not respond for 7 hours and it hurt but as soon as i got that dopamine hit I was on top of the world. Unfortunately I pushed her away with the neediness and we moved to a more casual relationship but she didn't see it like that and started meeting guys on tinder. This was a red flag because it didn't hurt as much as it should, she was still texting me and i was getting that dopamine from her attention.
Ashley Berges Everthing is going to be ok. I’ve come to terms with what I was dealing with. As soon as I get back on my feet, I still want to schedule a session with you! Thanks for your commentary. God bless.
Thank you for reaching out! The link to The 10 Day Challenge to Live Your True Life is: www.ashleyberges.com/product/10-day-challenge-to-live-your-true-alife-paperback/
You keep saying that we deserve we deserve we deserve. What we deserve our country to be running correctly as well. We deserve our streets to be good. We deserve to have economics. But this is not going to happen. People that abuse relationships should be in jail. Because it's a treason and do you understand what treason means. There's no more honesty love compassion honor respect loyalty. It's all gone now today.
I feel like it’s harder to see the red flags, when you don’t even know what a healthy relationship is, or how it’s supposed to be
True, or on the contrary become too critical and are never able to slow down and be happy in any relationship.
The best explanation I have found on RUclips on Addictive Relationships
Today is my first day as i got out of an addictive relationship...he has adhd, we lived together for 2 years, he moved to other country to be with me , with his dog. it was the best and the worst period of my life. tnx for this video cuz i need to know that im not alone and that i will be happy again.
I’m going through this now I prayer blessing over all us that hurt over a addictive relationship 😭💔🙏🏾
You’ve described my relationship with the ex narcissist wife. Thank God I pulled out of that evil cycle 3 years ago and healed from the emotional abuse.
Good for u :,)
I feel personally attacked. 😂 just kidding but this video was so helpful.
I became addicted to her. I was in such a trance the way i would look at her was so intence. She would even say comments about the way i looked at her. I even told her i was adicted to her like drugs. I have never been so hooked on anyone like her. I put her on a pedistal too i didnt even know who i was anymore. After i told her goodbye i shook for days i cryed it was misery it took months to let her go. I feel stupid now for acting that way i couldn't control it. She was my pic on my phone and i would constantly pick up my phone to look at her picture to get my fix.. I lost myself in this relationship was amazing for so long.... I wish i would of been normal with her. She was good to me.... I got on her ig and she has a new man . it hurts still.
I can relate... wish I could say it gets better, after a year... I wish i knew if it ever will
So sorry, hope you are doing better... I know how terrible this is 😕
Same here....with the picture....I would stare at his picture for hours....I didn't recognize myself.....
Same... wtf happened??? Its like I became unhinged--- why?
@@lisaariottiart I ask myself the same thing lol , Is it Love ? I don’t know or did we love too much ? Love overflow? It’s a messed up feeling
Just want to thank you Ashley, this is by far the clearest and most concise video I have seen on the subject.
Hi Ashley, honestly I guess I have kind of always known (subconsciously) that I was in a toxic relationship but I realize now that I needed to hear the signs out loud. Now that I actually have, I intend on learning as much as my brain can possibly take because I have been dealing with this problem for quite some time now and honestly speaking I have kind of been in denial cause the relationship I was addicted to didn't last very long and it has been over a year now since the break-up and I still find myself recalling the little glimpses of joy when all my decisions were based on infatuation. I am a 19-year teenager, with this being said, I didn't really see myself as a potential in the category of the romantically addicted...Now that I do, I appreciate you and all the work you do to help us damaged souls out here. May you have a blessed and prosperous life filled with joy, peace and love. THANK YOU!
Great video thank you! I was in a relationship with someone with bpd and it was addictive because of the love bombing until we got married...now on our separate ways. Tried to help by focusing on self but get blamed for everything. She needs to heal on her own. Truly pray that she does! 🙏🏽
I so needed to hear this. Thank you.
My question is, how do you get OUT of a addictive relationship; when you leave & the other person starts stalking, harrasing, making friendships with family, ******* your friends, calling your work??
Welp, my stomach hurts and I haven’t finished watching this. I guess I’m feeling guilty for a reason
I do not want this video to create guilt or a guilty feeling. Guilt is an empty emotion, delve past that feeling and realize when we are addicted to a relationship we lose ourself. You, yourself, wants to be known by you, that relationship is diverting your attention from what is truly important.
I think you are AMAZING... 6 YEARS.
I can see light when I listen to you.👏💔💓
Let my journey begin on finally letting go.
My life needs to begin.
God help me...
Don’t visit your dealers house.... what if it’s your estranged husband... I’m addicted to him... it’s toxic. I want to walk away (I’m actively preparing walk away, starting divorce process) he treats me terribly. I’m addicted to being with him, sex with him, the DRAMA. I have to leave. We have 2 daughters (one a newborn). My internal push to be a good mom is what drives me to leave. Deep down, I wish I could stay. It feels so good at times (like a high).... but the lows are devastating... I need off this ride, but what a ride. I reminisce (probably a rose colored version of the past) but as I’m preparing to leave I’m feeling intense grief. All I do is cry at night... I hope this next vid is helpful. It takes strength to walk away. It seems at times easier to stay. Pray my strength
a thumbs down? Im so surprised by that..this is a STELLAR video. straight forward, clear, concise. Bravo, Ashley. Blown away by your material.
I am getting out of an addictive relationship and the only thing that truly saved me in a way was a big devastating fight in which ended the relationship completely. There is one fundamental kye that I think can often save a person in these situations and that is another person moving on with somebody else and it's hard to understand that at first but it's better because then you'll be back in the same cycle. That is what saved me in my addictive relationship with the partner that I was with.
Can i give u a hug? Geeze this video gave me so much clarity.
Your videos are effing awesome
Thank you CB! You're awesome.
I agree... any videos on limerence and spouses who cheat and refuse to leave the affair?!?!
I love you and your perspective you share with us all. Thank you!
I've been clean and sober for 29 years. I keep getting involved in these types of relationships and at one time I was going to CODA. Unfortunately, where I live doesn't have them or even ALANON. I just broke it off with my ex for my own self preservation. Your video spoke volumes to me. I'm having a migraine, I need to get my head straight and although I understand her problems, it's like being on a Roller Coaster! I don't have any tattoos on me that say Duncan because I'm not a freakin Yo Yo! Thanks helping me get focused Ma'am. 😊❤️🙏💯
I think trust in a relationship is overrated. When my husband started getting frequent night calls , i would ask and he would just wave off those calls as unimportant. At a time i could take no more of his lies, I decided i deserve to know what was going on. A friend of mine referred me to this great ethical hacking team( Cyberhackingsage@gmail ) who helped clone his cellphone without having to touch the device. My husband was a cheating Narcissist and I’m glad i found out all his secrets and infidelity and how he planned on using this pandemic to get back to me. I got access to his Facebook, iMessage, GPS location , WhatsApp, Call Logs and Text Messages (both deleted and incoming ones) with a remote link to a programmed App on my phone. I’m here in Florida and able to access my husband’s phone even while he was away in Canada cheating on me. Thanks to Cyberhackingsage, now i have enough evidence for my divorce. If you need help or that little bit of closure, i advice you get in touch with them Via Gmail ( cyberhackingsage@gmail )Or Text and WhatsApp them on +15713758467...thank me later.
I need to stop this cycle in my life. I thought I had healed & grown. Yet now I find myself in a bad relationship again. I went through counseling but found the constant rehashing not to be helpful. I want the HOW to move past these issues.
The update:: I'm not in a bad relationship but we do go through really bad moments. 2020 has tested us hard! That has tried our patience with each other but we have grown so much through the storm. I'm grateful I didn't jump ship in the middle of the hurricane.
You are so right! Love all your videos. I would add actual physical and mental withdrawal symptoms when trying to remove from the relationship x
Ashley, your video's have been a huge help with my divorce. Thanks
I've been eating an addictive relationship for 8 years, this video has been really helpfull
I was abused by my cousins physically as a kid, and I didn’t have any friends. And a girl came into my life and started treating me worse, she flirted with me and we did stuff even though she had a boyfriend, and then she accused me of rape. When she started it, and then she distanced herself, then she came back into my life like a hurricane 4 months later, and it only got worse. It got physical, she tried to kill me a few times and I still have an addiction toward the way she treated me. It felt familiar, and scary. And it felt like I deserved it, and once I separated myself from her I realized I deserved better, but I still find myself wanting what she did to me, even tho it caused me a lot of emotional pain. Well emotional and physical
Thank you so much for this video, it changed me life! I’ve been in this exact situation for 6+ years and it finally dawned on me: All of my knowledge of addictions were only chemical based.
But once I stepped back and looked at my cycles (self empowerment>divorce>guilt>relapse>guilt>self loathing, so on and so fourth) I realized that this whole situation has addiction written all over it. My biggest Achilles heel in all of this being our two children. So cutting off contact has been next to impossible. We have to talk, and see each other. every time these things happen, that door is left open, and eventually I walk back through it into the addiction or relationship. How do I navigate this?
I am in the same situation.
I got into this dynamic...8years and a daughter...we started in a triangle and it never got better...it was my whole life ..eventually he started to destroy me..one month and 14days free ..it hurts so badly but staying hurt way worse
Thank you for all your videos. You are truly amazing. I am looking forward to the next video where we can learn to walk the walk. You are God sent.
I appreciate you Heidi, thank you very much for your comment and being amazing. You are God sent.
Thank you for the wise words. You are completely right. It can be hard at some points. Thank you for the great content as always!!
You're most welcome, thank you for reaching out. I appreciate you!
No yelling and screaming with me. I hold it all in to avoid confrontation and the anxiety that comes with it.
Thank you . I learned so much .
I am so glad it was helpful to you
well described ! thx u so much for sharing such insights..
Great explination and very helpful session.
Love and respect for you
You are a wise woman, Ashley!
Very useful video, thank u
Thank you for your comment it helps me to know which videos are really helpful. The next will be out in a few days. I appreciate you reaching out!
Thank you. Helpful. I identify here. Need to change bless you
This podcast changed the entire way I looked at the shitty relationship I was in. I realized that I was not thinking about anything else except this person. I became obsessed and I am a strong woman so it was out of character for me. I only dated him 3 months. I started to have anxiety& get diarrhea. He would drink and tell me what I wanted to hear and act like I was crazy when I’d bring it up to him. This podcast woke me up. I am way too good for this type of bullshit. I sent it to many other woman and I hope it helps them as well.
Thank you Ashley
Top notch content.
And definitely something that I have been trying to get to the bottom of with myself.
How do you heal this addiction?
This is very helpful😶😶 thank you!!
Glad it was helpful, thank you for reaching out to me.
Very thanks to this video, Im in this kind of relationship, always fight always accusing cheating even if not, now always threatening me, im very stress now dont know how to exit bout this kinda of relationship
Great video! I appreciate all of your help and advice. ♡♡♡♡
Thank you for sharing ❤️💗🙏
Facts. Thank you.
You're welcome! :)
12:36 right!! you are the best Ashley!!
Greetings from Monterrey, Mexico.
Guess I already knew when I searched.
I came to believe that a power greater than myself could restore me to sanity
I just had a brain wave then. When you lower your self esteem what you do is you devalue yourself in the eyes of the beholder (being the person you want to be with) and when you look like you are desperate for the attention, for the validation - they know they can walk all over you, because when you get to that please don't leave me part you become needy in the eyes of the other person and you loose value. To regain value again is to work on yourself, your self worth and get it back otherwise people think that they can treat you with a lack of respect and without it makes for a miserable marriage or partnership so yes, work on yourself. Get your attractive qualities back or that person wouldn't have pursued you in the beginning and if you are in a controlling relationship with someone that is when they know they have complete control over you. Your giving them control!! If he or she is a manipulator anyway they will see it in your behaviours. Knowing your self value and worth increases the chances of getting them to want you again but it's not about just getting them to want you, that will just give them a massive ego boost, it's about doing it for you to project forward, not for them!!! You help me gain clarity and answers every day.
It felt all consuming with the X yet never fulfilling or satisfying,
it always felt " off " from the start.
It did feel like an addiction trying to make it work 😵
it felt like climbing Mt. Everest 😓 but never reaching the top
Excellent...
I needed this
thank you i needed that so much
You are most welcome! So glad you reached out too! Let me know of any content you'd like me to discuss.
I am in the beginning of trying to get away from my boyfriend, this describes our relationship to a T..... And above all else I think the hardest part is the sadness and heartache. The heartache over thinking this was the love of my life and now I'm thinking I don't even know who this person is. :(
Is this also connected to a trauma bond relationship?
Im still addicted to her, and she has cheated and mentally abused me. I just got out of the Psychward TONIGHT and she staryed texting me and i cant help but forgive her. Even after watching this i dont thjnk i can change. I want her to leave me for good but she wont. What do I do?
I'm addicted to Ashely videos 😜
How do get a away from an addictive relationship. When the person (drug) will chase you to the ends of the earth?
but what shall i do if i am in ?
so suffering ! to get out
I've been in an addictive relationship for a year now, it started getting addicted during quarantine due to her bipolar making her distance and fuck me did i chase her attention, it's been killing me for months. I kept saying deep down i don't love this girl so why do i need her? The main addiction came through texts, she would sometimes not respond for 7 hours and it hurt but as soon as i got that dopamine hit I was on top of the world. Unfortunately I pushed her away with the neediness and we moved to a more casual relationship but she didn't see it like that and started meeting guys on tinder. This was a red flag because it didn't hurt as much as it should, she was still texting me and i was getting that dopamine from her attention.
I'm in it and I need to get out of it. This is not normal
Thank you.
Thank you for reaching out London!
Ashley Berges Everthing is going to be ok. I’ve come to terms with what I was dealing with. As soon as I get back on my feet, I still want to schedule a session with you! Thanks for your commentary. God bless.
I just met my girlfriend 2 days ago and I feel like im getting additive or it's something else. I'm here to identify it.
Had the first 3 months be a smooth patch then 8 days of a rough patch and now it's over so I don't know how it would've went so it's killing me
Not interested, what shall I do?
thank you!!
Thank you for reaching out Emma!
Help full
Can you do it without a terapist ?
Would this video count as one for spouses in emotional affairs?
Bro,,,,, step on me with these facts :(
Wow,wow,wow....
This is 100%
Every single one .
✌👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍 sounds like my FATHER n I!!!!! My whole life! With him!
MY GIRLFRIEND 💜💜💜💜💜
🙄She's not wrong tho...
Damm I m suffering from everything
Hello, I know of a powerful and harmless lady who can help you, she helped me before, And I strongly believe that she can help you.WhatsApp her👇👇👇👇👇👇
Here I leave you her WhatsApp number🥰🥰
+2349079214299⏯⏯💕💕🥰🥰
Where is the link for your book?
Thank you for reaching out! The link to The 10 Day Challenge to Live Your True Life is: www.ashleyberges.com/product/10-day-challenge-to-live-your-true-alife-paperback/
👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👌👌👌👌👌👌👌👌👌👌👌👌👌👌
interesting you use Spanish
god damn it.
You look so stressed out.
You keep saying that we deserve we deserve we deserve. What we deserve our country to be running correctly as well. We deserve our streets to be good. We deserve to have economics. But this is not going to happen. People that abuse relationships should be in jail. Because it's a treason and do you understand what treason means. There's no more honesty love compassion honor respect loyalty. It's all gone now today.