He missed my income, my slavery to his laundry list of daily tasks, etc. Thank God I don't have to deal with his abuse anymore. I will NEVER allow myself to be sucked into another narcissistic abusive relationship again. 😕
This is how I feel right now. You have to be pure evil, the purest form, to put someone through what we are going through. A spawn of Satan to render this kind of pain onto someone else...
The hardest truth about narcissistic abuse according to my own experience: It is almost impossible to REALLY explain how the abuse worked. Even if you have all the terms for narcissism.Most people will only really get it when they have experienced themselves (which i still hope will never happen)
I am actually thinking about getting off of social media totally and completely, because nothing is realistic and the flying monkeys are on every app. As soon as they find where you are, they hoover and attack. I am sick of it. I don't need the stress. I am fine without it. This empath is protecting herself from ALL toxicity.
Mary,I did it 3 years ago,best choice ever.The only thing I am on, is U tube as a watcher not a producer ,because it's where I self educate) Even though I have less Idea of what is going on with everone because they are all addicted to it,it has saved my peace of mind and made it easy to avoid minions and flying monkeys of the Narcissists.It also stops the Narcissists I have gone no contact with (Mother,ex H and a friend) from having a window into my life.Huge improvement in privacy !!! My daughters ( 20 and 27) dont use social media much compared to many of their peers, other than how it supposed to be used (,not as self promotion) and they do not post pictures of me or my home so it has really helped me to clear out my life of fakery. Also problematic people from my past cannot contact me out of the blue,and try a hoover or a do over,like they used to. What i did notice is that social media really reveals the ClusterBs once one becomes educated. (It plays out in what they say,the comments they make on others posts and pics and the things they choose to promote about themselves) BUT the benefit of the huge firewall I have around my life due to being off social media out weighs this for me. Information that Cluster B types get from social media is used to ,smear ,covertly seek supply ,triangulate etc etc.
Married 35 yrs to a narcissist, always playing victim, always accusing me of cheating, even after a polygraph that she hired for me to take. Long story short, she’s the one that was cheating and got caught. My sorrow is losing my home and pension after working all my life, kind of hard to rebuild at 60. Narcissist are demonic and evil. I pray every day that I’ll be okay and meet a loving woman that I deserve and deserves me. Your message reveals my soon to be ex wife’s narcissistic behavior 100 percent. Thank you for your message.
Nick. I was in a very similar situation. Except , I was never accused of infidelity. I suspected she cheated , but the marriage was poor and ending and I had young children. So I put it out of my mind, we were married in 77 so by the time she became truly intolerable and said This Marriage is Over, You have to leave…I was 54. Years of horrid Family Court , in an absurd State with archaic laws . She behaved beyond what anyone could believe ( Attorneys) They ruin lives. I don’t think they are evil, per se, but they have no boundaries at All. Thing we would Never do because we were brought up with good morals, are just OK with them. Police,TROs, making sure your children forsake you with brainwashing and lies, cheating. All in a Days work for them. Lol By the time I was clear of her Many ancillary lawsuits, I too was older, 59. I had lost a terrific home that I put so much of myself in it . Kids were now liars or hateful towards me. So she accomplished what she set out to.. Total destruction of someone who only wanted to Love, Provide and Protect her . Work on yourself. Kemo Sabe, I met a great PsyD who put me on the path as to what was wrong with her. I used to just say. I can’t make her happy. Sad to ruin lives, but they would never discuss that with you. They were so damaged early on that they know no other way than to seek Adulation or obtain supply by hurting and devaluing others. My life has been hard, I dated a bit, but the women I read into were so damaged, either always or after their divorce and the people they met after .
Hey brother almost like my story with ex- wife only 22 years in the marriage.. my pension I work 33 years gave her 10 1/2 year of my pension to the Narc guess what first wife was a Narc also these Narc love to cheat anyway first Narc die the beginning of the year I believe in karma…
Took me 10 and 20 years respectively to get clear and recover. I was devastated. I became deathly physically ill and got a LOT of help. Definitely self-isolated. Until I found out what a narcissist is, I was in the dark. I am just now coming out of it. Your insights are concise and on point - very clear and helpful. I thank you, Andrew!
Narcissist was the word I've been looking for my entire adult life. It suddenly had a name, and I suddenly knew it wasn't going to ever change. These people are what they are.
@@cc1k435 Same, I'm 55 years old & I never heard (and learned) that word till about 4 years ago .... Andrew & his channel here is outstanding! Blessing to you for loads of healing!
I stop listening to content like this once I started healing more... But I still have times where I feel low and wonder what is wrong with me... And something like this pops up and it really helps me get through these times. Thank you so much for your kind yet stern words. I really appreciate this channel.
After a 9 year relationship and harsh discard, and 6 months of researching narcissism and trauma bonds, I discovered your site this morning and feel understood and better equipped to go forward 🙏
I hope your healing everyday, I am 7 months removed from a 7 year relationship with my narcissist ex and it's been rough but it's getting better. We are all here for each other, thank you for sharing. 🙏
I left my covert narcissist 3 days ago after 3 years... I've suffered every angle of narcissism & ashamed I stayed so long... I miss something but not him... my time now is to heal & flourish... I've learnt so much here!
I discarded a covert narcissist a couple of months ago. I realized that I missed who I thought the narcissist was, not who the narcissist Really was. Think about that. This is a great channel. I have learned a lot from Andrew. The community is kind and supportive. I wish you well with your path.
@Nikki G yes the planted seed of hope that didn't grow... out of the darkness of a narcissist realm I wish you happiness on your journey back to a vivid light...
His last words about me were 'she made my life miserable ' to our son. That was 26 years of being a slave and putting his needs before mine. Still wasnt able to find contentment. I am in good place now after years of abuse and slavery. He is still finding faults with the new supply the grass wasnt greener after all that. Im glad out of that chaos and drama.
Parallel experience for me too. I think, however, my ex will chose to not move in with any new supply again, so that she wont see who he truly is, so that he wont find fault in her and so that he can continue dating lots of other women. Like you, Im just glad to be out of that chaos and drama (everyday).
The narcisists regret how we made them feel, what we did for them, what we gave them, how we provided for them - simply what supply we were. The truth will set us free. Thank you Andrew.
After 16 years & a child together, I found out the narc was cheating with someone he was seeing on the side, even brought her into my home to play house for a week while I was out of town. He denied all of it, even though I have audio /video recordings of it & is blaming me for cheating (never even thought about another man, I was so in love with him). He has done some awful things to me, even gaslighting to the point where he almost had me believing I was losing my mind & needed help! Thank you so much for sharing your knowledge & insights. It’s helping me get through this very difficult time. I appreciate your help!
Some of your story is similar to mine. I hated going on work trips. One time I was giving a presentation and I literally got sick from a whole different state! The narc had the nerve to bring that low life ho into my home to be with her. That is even worse than the act itself bc I see it as being a real devil
I don't know whether my narcissist thinks about me anymore or not, and I'm not sure I care. I know, however, that the experience opened an opportunity for me to learn about myself in ways I otherwise wouldn't have. The wounds we all experience through narcissistic abuse are like cuts into our souls. Ironically, those cuts aren't all bad. They become windows into ourselves that we wouldn't have made on our own. Thanks to the narcissists, we can now see deeper into ourselves and our souls. We now have understanding and truth, two of the most powerful things a person can possess.
Well said.. When I think about the first version of myself.. I was so lost, so weak, people pleaser, willing to do anything to make someone like me. Seeking approval, no idea what I WANT from life. Such a poor existence. Now I know all I need is myself and my own approval!
Yes! They (IMO) are meant to be the catalyst for your ultimate awakening 🙏🏻 I’ve never experienced such pain but pain is what causes us to have profound growth forces us to see the truth. I’ve been saying this is the hardest thing I’ve ever endured although I’ve been through some really rough times this takes the cake BUT I am extremely grateful it has opened me up to my shadow and made me fearless!🖤✨ While we are learning a valuable lesson and becoming the best version of ourselves, the narcissist is and always will be stuck in their skewed perception false reality miserable; and fine tuning their manipulative skills only to remain stagnant. We are victors not victims 🦋
I did everything for my ex. Any time she complained about something or had a problem....I fixed it and took care of it. Fixing the cars, house, take care of the dogs, constant back cracks and massages for her bad back, always attended all her family events, cooked and cleaned, etc. Literally everything. I stayed for way way too long and put up with way way too much bad behavior....behavior I never tolerated with anyone else and Im frankly ashamed of myself for it. I really thought she was the one and I wanted kids and a family with her.
You are not alone. I felt/did the same. She's the one, kids, house, dog, etc. Only to find out that I was dating the worst person I ever met. I nicknamed her Satans mistress. They are demons and only want to drag you into the muck where they live. Eh, wiser now and moving on.
I did the same, everything to keep peace in the house. I had to feed the kids before she got home from work so I would not have to listen to her yelling at the kids at the dinner table. She dumped every responsibility and chore on me including our kids. After 10 years of marriage, she had her affair and moved out on us. Her best gift for me was leaving me.
I can relate, was with her for 20 years. Did everything to provide, yet she still monkey branched to another man and lied and cheated throughout the ManipulationShit!
They (IMO) are meant to be the catalyst for your ultimate awakening 🙏🏻 I’ve never experienced such pain but pain is what causes us to have profound growth forces us to see the truth. I’ve been saying this is the hardest thing I’ve ever endured although I’ve been through some really rough times this takes the cake BUT I am extremely grateful it has opened me up to my shadow and made me fearless!🖤✨ While we are learning a valuable lesson and becoming the best version of ourselves, the narcissist is and always will be stuck in their skewed perception false reality miserable; and fine tuning their manipulative skills only to remain stagnant. We are victors not victims 🦋
I wasn’t going to watch this video, because I COULDN’T CARE LESS about what the narcissist thinks about me or even THAT she thinks about me, but I wanted to do my part in supporting a great guy who has been there for our community. Thanks for the ego stroke, and thanks always for your kind and thoughtful insights, Andrew. ❤
Andrew- you are so spot on! You are humble and direct, experienced, wise and generous! I appreciate you tremendously. I am grateful for YT’s algorithm sending you to me today!!! Best man with narc knowledge 💛👍🙏
I ran into my ex-husband Narc at McDonald’s in 2019. I heard him on the phone in a booth as I walked in, never turning to look at him. There was no one else in the lobby. I had to wait a long time to get my coffee. I walked out the door near the counter, never once looking back at him near the opposite wall and took a path all the way around the outside of the building to get to my car. I drove off. 😉😉😉
My narc regrets I am making him accountable for adult behaviors and have EXPOSED his childish behaviors to the community. ( He has been displaying his temper tantrums in public. ) 😔
Ditto! I'm making him pay child support. 'You didnt have to do that', he said. Well, yes I did, because I didnt want to keep chasing him down for money, having to keep in contact with him, still under his control.
@@TheSeekeroftruth1 Not my experience but my sister's experience. ( Late 70's early 80's $15/ week 2 kids in diapers. ) He didn't even pay that and it was court ordered. 🙄 Didn't really cover the cost of ANYTHING. NOT DIAPERS, NOT FORMULA, NOTHING. 😔
I've said it before and will say it again : this narcissist, my now ex husband, will NEVER find anyone who cared about him as much as I did or will do as much for him as i did with the amount of effort i did. If he ever has any regrets sorry, that's his problem. He had almost 7 years to be a true husband, a true friend but he chose to use me for money, for personal gain, as someone to put credit cards and loans for him in my name meanwhile he was running around with whoever doing whatever, never had any time for me only excuses.
With three different narcissistic exes, I had the opportunity to observe them from a distance when they believed they were alone and were unaware anyone was observing. In all three instances, they appeared emotionally dead. There was no joy in them. They were like black holes waiting for the next human to come into their orbit. I had believed the love was in them, but it had been coming from me.
@@Hatbox948mine had a whiteboard in his room with various goals, projects, trips & finances .. and on the bottom is “Stay Happy!!!”… must be his reminder to pretend that he is happy and to keep the facade of happiness at all times…
I was nothing more but a servant and a sex slave. I was given the “I care about you “ card , before the discard I was given the “ I want to keep you in my life because you’re older and I have questions “ card. “I want to stay friends “ card. Was given the “I want to live with you let’s get a place together “ card. I probably have more but I’m going through the been discarded totally, which is fine except I’m emotionally exhausted.
Hang in there. You are not alone in where you are on your recovery journey. I'm so glad you had the courage & strength it took (& I KNOW it took a lot!) to reach out & post a helpful comment. Thank you! Stay safe, remain sane, be YOUR best self TO yourself. Best of luck to you, sister.
@@shivasgirl1609 Thank you for being supportive, it’s people like you on here that have helped me as well as the individuals who make the videos. My freedom is coming, I can feel it 👍and then it’s moving forward to live my best life 🥰
@@emilykathleenn absolutely and the future faking. I even got the smear campaign up at the ski lodge, I was supposed to be the stalker because women just won’t leave him alone, yeah right. I saw more nice looking women give him the brush off when ever he would flirt and then deny it. One gal actually waved him away and I knew exactly why. I kind of laughed about that to myself. When he was finally caught with both of us girls in the same restaurant and he backed out I confronted him and he got upset with accusing me of he wasn’t allowed to have other friends. Everything this jerk was saying from the getgo was all lies. My bff said that it’s better for me because now he can be someone else’s problem 🤣🤣😂🤭. Sounds like a better plan for me 👍I’m still having to deal with the mental abuse I endured, I’m sure I’ll get through 😂
That was me. Servant and sex slave. My body wasn't my own. It was disgusting. He even asked to come back for sex while seeking and having new supply. How pathetic. And they actually think you want them back for that. Omg
They have to live with themselves 24/7!! It sucks being them. I love God I love myself and he couldn't take that away from me. Demonic behavior that I had to rebuke.
I see them as robotic playing the same programme over and over, no insight or introspection to grow or learn from mistakes, due the deep shame instinctively motivating all their behaviour and keeping the mask in place.
Every narcs i had in my life broke my trust and that's why i will never take them back in my life. That's a done deal folks. Great video Andrew thank you. ❤😊
One of the good things about reaching the "pinnacle of indifference " is that you do not care if the narcissist has regrets or not. You simply don't care. I do most definitely remember the days when I did wonder if the narcissist regretted leaving. I knew in my heart that he must have, because I did know that I gave everything I had. Not everyone does that. As you always say Andrew, each day brings you closer & closer to realizing who the narcissist is. They weren't having a bad year, they weren't stressed, they won't go back to who they were in the beginning. That was an act. They never were that person. My friends, you will realize this one day. Be patient with yourselves. Thank you Andrew for doing a video on what a lot of people are wondering. God bless 🙂
I really did a lot for the relationship, until I realized that MY LOYALTY BECAME SLAVERY ! It will be difficult for him, to find another replacement.I don't know, if he has any regrets or feelings, I was just a posession not a real independent person for him. It doesn't matter! Thx for this powerful video, Andrew❤😊🌞
My first indication that they are indeed a narc. is indifference to peoples emotions. At times it looks like empathy, but its only empathy when the narc still needs something
I had a Phoenix tattooed on my thigh years ago. I had three Letters K, S, L tattooed on my wrist - Knowledge, Strength and Love. I always knew the letters would play a role I just didnt know how. The past few years I realized it was a map of my journey here. That I was first to gain Knowledge by going thru life's Trying experiences, I was then going to need to find my Strength in order to move past and Thrive after those experience's and IF I was able to do that, I would find what I crave most, Love and Self Love. Finding your channel a month after I ended a toxic relationship as A Supply source and I KNOW I was meant to see this and be here and damn thats hard to say but Ive been watching you ALL day and I know you are part of that journey and Im SO VERY GRATEFUL FOR YOU. THANK YOU
You're 100% on point Andrew, if you were to interview me you would be stunned. I've endured being married to a narcissist for 39 years and she is just toxic, I'm going to divorce her in a few weeks and get my sanity back along with my happiness.
They fall in love with you again, but only when you completely change everything about yourself and in yourself, your appearance, put a smile back on your face, etc. That's what Sam Vaknin claims.
Even a family member told me that what he was doing was abuse. It took me 12 years, and now I still deal with many issues. But with God's help, prayers, and support I can go on.
Ive been there and still picking up the pieces.. im not gona waste my time on mentally trying to figure out everyone anymore . I just stay away from these people. Alot of messed up people too .
You WILL get through this! Keep educating yourself and watching as many videos as you can. I was a shell of myself after my ex narc discarded me after 4 1/2 years and a 2 year engagement. I honestly thought I had gone crazy, didn’t know who I was and cried almost every day. I immersed myself in watching videos and gathering as much information as I could. It’s been a month and 2 days since my discard and I’m finally feeling like my old self before she came into my life. Had to go no contact and haven’t looked back. It’s no easy task but what will help is knowing you’re not alone!! It also helps to not take it so personally once you know how the narcissist’s mind works. Still hurts badly but it’s easier knowing how their sick minds work
It's been six years and ten months since I left the narcissist. And every day I live my life freely and joyfully. Thank you, Andrew, for this video. You're right about these evil people. I hope everyone have a blessed day. Stay strong. We are beautiful, loving and compassionate.
What was regretted most by the narcissist is why couldn't I be the person I am after the narc relationship during the time I was in the relationship. Namaste. 🙏 ❤️
Things got way unbalanced dealing with the Narc(s). Earlier days of naivete- "There are givers and takers." No one wants to be labeled as an obvious "taker" and Narcs are good at disguising that. Where "giving" too much got way out of hand for myself, I'm working on better boundaries. Little did I know about narcissism that goes 500 fathoms deeper in mind games, manipulation and cruelty, than most who haven't experienced it, realize.. I feel it's like a war of attrition- an empath can recover energy and recharge upon getting out, but the narc will eventually wear down.👍🙏
"Who you are, what you provided - your honor, your dignity, your integrity, your courage, your strength, your resilience, your empathy"... Is what they'll never have. Is what they'll never be. Remember these words. Thank you, Andrew. ❤️ Love to you all, fellow survives! and thrivers! You are not alone! 💞
Narcissists are spiritually damaged children living in adult bodies and the age of the child you perceive inside is the age at which they were hurt so badly (usually by a parent) that they shut down inside and never moved past it. And as a hurt child living with all the responsibility of an adult life, they are so full of fear and pain that their existence is nothing BUT fear and pain. This leaves a lot of room for dark thoughts, bad energy and even demons. This is a horrible place to be, so when they treat you badly, just have compassion for their pain and know where they are coming from... you are dealing with a hurt little child, possibly dominated by a nasty force speaking for them and even enslaving them to keep them locked up where they are, whilst it treats you like crap ie you aren't really talking to them, ur talking to what ever they unknowingly let in their door which promised them a sense of power. This doesn't mean that you shouldn't protect yourself from their behaviour, just have compassion for their position as well, coz regardless of the pain you are in, they are in much greater pain and will be forever until a greater force heals them. For this, God is the only source of healing here...
Thank you for writing that. You exactly described the man I loved but had to leave. I had so much compassion for him. He was so child-like at times. So hurt and wounded from his mother. I have prayed (and fasted) so much for God's healing touch and still do. But the passive aggressive silent treatments, throwing things in a tantrum, insulting me. I was so good to him. But it was never enough. His friends always told him; 'she's too good for you' They saw it. He had been through a lot. But so have I. And like you said, it was almost like the demons who tormented him were attacking me. I stayed 4.5 years.
@@chicagogal I know exactly what you're saying... I stayed 30 yrs and i still love him as a friend but he has his free will and that can't ever be taken from him so... I only know all this becoz i felt so compelled to truly understand what they were, being born to 1, raised by a 2nd, married a 3rd, left and met a 4th, and i began to see a pattern!!! 😅 I drove everyone around me insane for 18 months until a finally grasped the entire concept of it, and that comment was the short version encapsulation of it all. And i felt it extremely important that i understood it so well becoz narcissists grow up to create narcissists out of their children which means this world is being covered in them right now and soon our species will be nothing BUT narcissists and that's a difficult place to live in... "critical and hard to deal with" to be more precise. I'm glad i helped you...
Thank you for your videos, you have helped me so much. I know my ex still thinks about me no doubt. I treated him like a king. My loving caring nature. He never had that in his relationships. He never reciprocated... He would always belittle me, degrade me, make a fool of me , manipulate and try and control me. His ex wife cheated on him numerous times then divorced him... Oh well as the saying goes. I didn't lose him he lost me... See how that works for him.
Thank you for another great video, Andrew. I know that the biggest regret the narcissist has regarding me is that I watched videos on RUclips and found out about narcissism. After finding out the truth, I made a plan. I discarded them. I don’t think the narcissist’s life is filled with rainbows or puppies or kittens. 😊 I’m thrilled that they are not a part of my life. With every passing day, I’m becoming empowered and stronger. God bless all of us. 🌈👍🦋🦅😺🐶🕊️
@NikkiGRocks4Ever I just finished reading your comment and as I started rejoicing, I got a revelation from the Lord Jesus Christ. I don't know what you believe spiritually but I felt compelled to share this. The Lord just made me understand that in His mercy, He heard our cries - us, the multitudes who have been victimized by narcissists. He caused these teachers on here to really, really understand narcissists, help us understand the narcs too and to help us heal. Meanwhile, we get the community in the comments section so we can encourage each other and know we are not alone and there is light at the end of the tunnel. The Lord is saying that it is not the RUclips income, books or courses they may sell but they truly have received grace to help us whether or not we can pay for it. So they give us grace. These RUclips content creators are the mother and father I never had. In the comment section, I find the brothers and sisters I never had as I only had one sibling, a narcissist sister! One evening, after the worst terror from my narcissist mom for 50 years, I cried out to the Lord Jesus in utter despair. The next evening, He led me to search RUclips and before you now it, I was watching these videos. That was last December. I had no idea I was dealing with a malignant narcissist. Now I know what's up! The Lord had reminded me to focus on my one perfect parent, my heavenly Father. That plus this RUclips community of empathetic teachers who teach us, counsel us, love us and fellow survivors is one of the best things that's ever happened to me. Thank You Jesus!
I dumped social media right before I vanished from my personal narcissist's life - she's not my narcissist anymore and I pity the flying monkey that acquired her.
It has really bugged me that this could happen to me, though I knew my value. I'd had a happy marriage of 46 years, and my husband passed. My Mom passed, and my two siblings who had discarded me when I married, returned with lawyers. It has been hard to get free of them because of the law firms. But I've stayed strong, and am coming through a challenging time period. I have been bashed. Never would have believed that this would have happened. But I am seeing that it is a spiritual path. I am doing this, and will take the lessons with me.
Thanks Andrew. It still amazes me how this happened..I would have never thought But when I look back at the last 2 AND a half years I am just totally stunned. I'm a giver I know how to love. I'm a yes man I take care of people because it makes me feel good..I get that SICK FEELING in my guts..😢
I got a Hoover last weekend and he told me that he’s slow but he gets it now, and all good!! Wow! The way he had turned it all around on me! He’s the one that started ghosting me off and on 7 months ago! Now I didn’t answer his message he’s mad so I most likely won’t hear from him again. Thank God I found your channel. Thank you Andrew 🙏💪
Proverbs 10:7 the memory of righteous is a blessing but the name of the wicked shall rot 🙏 Common sense, sound judgment and following Christ is the way ❤
Great video Andrew. I eventually woke up to the fact that I was devalued and discarded on a regular basis. I gave to a fault but not anymore, the fountain has been turned off. One suggestion I have for ppl is to keep a journal and review it from time to time. Keeps you from lying to yourself. When you see the negatives out weighing the positives, it’s time to do your own discard.
This is great advice. And a calendar, to see patterns to events. There's no denial after a while when it's ongoing, right in front of you through the months & years.
Listening to alot of these videos an reading many of the comments I have more clearity of what the experience was like. Being trama bonded to the narc I could not see the empaths that crossed my path. Some had reached out to me but I was so wrapped up with the narc that I could not respond . I like to think I have a better roadmap to guide me now. There are many beautiful people that care and are willing to walk this journey called life with us. If there were not this channel would not exist. So much hope here with all of you! Thanks Andrew for opening the door for all of us!
I left a narcissist in 2008 and I’m recovered now. In my healing process I had other narcissistic relationships and had to look at childhood trauma and dealt with complex PTSD from childhood abuse and neglect and it’s a process and the first narcissist I experienced was my mother and it conditioned me for other narcissistic relationships.
In the early days I used to wonder did he ever think of me now I really don’t care I know what he lost I’m the one that got away re found myself never to fall for lies and manipulation & control, I can sleep at peace knowing that I’m moving forward in life with only good intentions towards anyone. 🙏💕
One of the last statements my malevolent narcissistic mother made on her death bed was “I fucked up”. This was told to me by one of her flying monkeys (sister) as I had gone no contact months before!…. I just wonder if she meant her entire life or just me “my precious one”lol .. whatever I sure did get the last laugh 😅.
They are heartless, soulless... even formless. The purest form of evil to render such pain onto others. There is no justice for the pain I feel. No consolation for my tears. No soothing to this bottomless sadness. I want vengeance... I want this suffering to stop.
Please, find a way to forgive. I know it's hard. I'm going thru the same thing. But, let God be your justice. He will bring you thru a d give you someone who will treat you with the respect you deserve
Before I got the education; when I was discarded, I chalked it up to that we couldn't live together harmoniously; and that whoever she was going off to (yes she hinted at it to hurt me) that they weren't going to love her. I was aware of how much poor behavior I put up with, and also that I stood on my head and did cartwheels for her- to no avail- I knew that hope in the relationship was misguided but I tried anyways. Whatever superficial supply she hopped onto- was doomed. Then I got the education and holy smokes! And yes btw I did accept a hoover 6 months post discard before I knew what a hoover was- guys don't go there- a hoover is only meant to use you again to prop up their ego for a very short amount of time only to subsequently grind you into the ground- much much worse than you ever thought possible. It's PURE EVIL- DON'T FALL FOR IT! I almost didn't make it- I even had a plan- yup- I did; I didn't want to be here anymore- I wanted it to stop. DON'T GO THERE!!! You have to find the courage to stop replaying their lies in your head. It's very difficult- but your'e worth saving. At one point I had a dream that I ran into my 8yo self- and he was so beautiful, innocent, and uncorrupted- he just wanted to run and play and he didn't recognize me at all- I was a complete stranger to him. It was very profound. But it motivated me to get back to being who I AM, and not the person the narcissist tried to insidiously gaslight me into believing I was.
I often think of that innocent little girl,I was, I could see her dressed in shorts,cotton top,bangles,gold, on her wrist sitting on a brick wall .looking out,so innocent,,I would love to meet her in my dreams..she was a lovely child back then...hold her hands and tell her I am sorry for the pain,and regrets.
Good afternoon Andrew 🥰. SUPER GLUE😁, good one!! That's what us as Empaths do,SUPER GLUE our path forward and NEVER look back👍. Thank you, Andrew,you are definitely and absolutely a life saver. Take care,God bless 🙏 and much love💖🥰💞
Andrew, your videos do me so good. My best nourishment in times of pain, doubts or lonely moments. I always feel better after I listened to you. Thank you ever so much. Life is becoming better and better each day.
It was a long journey through hell but by the grace of GOD I TRAVELED THE ROAD OUT… I’d love to have my Akashic records read regarding this part of my earthly sojourn. One way or another in time or out of time I will eventually know and understand.😊
You are a good man, trying to help others. Keep up your great work. We need more people like yourself in this world. Narcs are a dangerous beings and are deasroyers of the Love, trust, and beauty of life and this world, balance is always achieved eventually. Take care all who are suffering out there. God bless and peace to you all.
Thank you, Andrew, for this great succinct and educational video. I was married nearly 38 years to a narcissist and finally, SAFELY, got out 4 years ago. God opened my eyes to what a narcissist is, thanks to my daughter directing me to a book on this personality disorder. I am now educated, have gone no contact with his flying monkeys out there, as well, and have moved on the other side of the country! God has healed me from false guilt and the self -condemnation for why I stayed so long in the relationship. I thank Him that He is helping me move forward in His grace and enabling me to live my best life in His wisdom, while encouraging other survivors of narcissistic abuse!
I loved this! Mine never apologized about anything! Lol! Always talking about how little time he has left on the planet, down to hours! I just yawn! Lol! He always was trying to impress everyone! His great career, etc. Yawn! He even left again for a blonde, blue eyed woman, 21 years younger, who made him feel alive again..🤮 The more of your videos, I watch, the more I realize he is a 100% narcissist. I am proud to be an Empath, though at times, it can be a painful thing to be...
I think that when the Narc notices that you are too smart, powerful and nooot to be mind controlled... He/she knows and discards you and moves on to another victim.. So sad, sick pple.
Great video Andrew. Yes after the discard i had to climb out of a really dark place, my heart and soul were broken i had no clue if I was going to make it. I did make it but i had to literally disappear from the narcissist. No social media i moved away i left everything behind i turned my phone off for about 4 months. It's taken alot of work some good days and some bad , but the difference is that now things don't seem so bad. And i can walk away and do what i want read go to a movie and i answer to nobody but myself. What my ex narcissist is doing or thinking i really don't care anymore he can stay where he is. Thank you everyone for your kind words and thank you Andrew for the video.
Thank you so much for spreading your light! As an empath unfortunately I am a magnet for these creatures! I am systematically ending all those relationships except my father who is in his 80s, and with multiple medical issues and I am his care giver. 😢
Andrew this is a great topic Saturday the narcissist called me and said that I let my volleyball team down I said who-do-you-think-you-are to tell me what to do are you my father I said don't you ever tell me what to do again I said you don't care about anyone but yourself after I got off the phone with the narcissist I felt really good about myself
![Seungmin "그렇게, 천천히, 우리(As we are)" | [Stray Kids : SKZ-PLAYER]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/kAzmhLHePqU/mqdefault.jpg)
Thanks for important insights, sharing for super- impaths 🙏🥳🧩♥️
Gratitude From Denmark🙏♥️🇩🇰
Welcome..💜🙏😌🇩🇰
Most of the time the narcissist comes back when you start healing. Stay strong. When the door closes, make sure it stays closed 😉
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Really?
It's closed FOREVER
...and locked!
Too late, I opened it. Have to heal again 😢💔
He missed my income, my slavery to his laundry list of daily tasks, etc. Thank God I don't have to deal with his abuse anymore. I will NEVER allow myself to be sucked into another narcissistic abusive relationship again. 😕
💪💪😁🙌 A-MEN, Mary!!! ❤❤❤
Ditto, well said!
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I'm living with my brother and his narcissist son!
Amen to that Mary 💪🙌 i am so happy for you. Free at last. 😉❤🙏
There is so much evil in this world that I prefer to stay single.
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This is how I feel right now. You have to be pure evil, the purest form, to put someone through what we are going through. A spawn of Satan to render this kind of pain onto someone else...
@@GreaterDeity evil is live backword Hmmm
Yup.
I'm not wasting my time again.
Heal those childhood wounds that’s why we didn’t see those creatures coming. Make sure you don’t take them back.
I was “Programmed” in my childhood to accept abuse from my manager, NEVER from a romantic partner!!!
The hardest truth about narcissistic abuse according to my own experience: It is almost impossible to REALLY explain how the abuse worked. Even if you have all the terms for narcissism.Most people will only really get it when they have experienced themselves (which i still hope will never happen)
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That’s so true. Not one single person I know gets it
So true!!
Absolutely true.
And one day, they have to stand before God, to give an account for their doings..
Amen, I pray mine goes with God and he makes Peace with God to save his soul, but that’s not in my hands.
I am not willing to be continually attacked anymore.
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❤
By ANYONE!!!!!!🖕🏿
You’ve nailed it with your insightful comment. So true - just sick of it and no more. Well done you x
I am actually thinking about getting off of social media totally and completely, because nothing is realistic and the flying monkeys are on every app. As soon as they find where you are, they hoover and attack. I am sick of it. I don't need the stress. I am fine without it. This empath is protecting herself from ALL toxicity.
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I thought I was the only one who had to deal with that. At least that's what they said they would do. Namaste
I hear ya Mary. I left all social media behind (other than RUclips). I don’t miss it. ❤
Animal channels, documentaries, and comedy would gladly welcome your presence! No strings attached. . . And MUCH enjoyment.
Mary,I did it 3 years ago,best choice ever.The only thing I am on, is U tube as a watcher not a producer ,because it's where I self educate)
Even though I have less Idea of what is going on with everone because they are all addicted to it,it has saved my peace of mind and made it easy to avoid minions and flying monkeys of the Narcissists.It also stops the Narcissists I have gone no contact with (Mother,ex H and a friend) from having a window into my life.Huge improvement in privacy !!!
My daughters ( 20 and 27) dont use social media much compared to many of their peers, other than how it supposed to be used (,not as self promotion) and they do not post pictures of me or my home so it has really helped me to clear out my life of fakery.
Also problematic people from my past cannot contact me out of the blue,and try a hoover or a do over,like they used to.
What i did notice is that social media really reveals the ClusterBs once one becomes educated.
(It plays out in what they say,the comments they make on others posts and pics and the things they choose to promote about themselves)
BUT the benefit of the huge firewall I have around my life due to being off social media out weighs this for me.
Information that Cluster B types get from social media is used to ,smear ,covertly seek supply ,triangulate etc etc.
Married 35 yrs to a narcissist, always playing victim, always accusing me of cheating, even after a polygraph that she hired for me to take. Long story short, she’s the one that was cheating and got caught. My sorrow is losing my home and pension after working all my life, kind of hard to rebuild at 60. Narcissist are demonic and evil. I pray every day that I’ll be okay and meet a loving woman that I deserve and deserves me. Your message reveals my soon to be ex wife’s narcissistic behavior 100 percent. Thank you for your message.
Nick. I was in a very similar situation. Except , I was never accused of infidelity. I suspected she cheated , but the marriage was poor and ending and I had young children. So I put it out of my mind, we were married in 77 so by the time she became truly intolerable and said This Marriage is Over, You have to leave…I was 54.
Years of horrid Family Court , in an absurd State with archaic laws . She behaved beyond what anyone could believe ( Attorneys)
They ruin lives. I don’t think they are evil, per se, but they have no boundaries at All. Thing we would Never do because we were brought up with good morals, are just OK with them.
Police,TROs, making sure your children forsake you with brainwashing and lies, cheating. All in a Days work for them. Lol
By the time I was clear of her Many ancillary lawsuits, I too was older, 59. I had lost a terrific home that I put so much of myself in it . Kids were now liars or hateful towards me. So she accomplished what she set out to..
Total destruction of someone who only wanted to Love, Provide and Protect her .
Work on yourself. Kemo Sabe, I met a great PsyD who put me on the path as to what was wrong with her.
I used to just say. I can’t make her happy.
Sad to ruin lives, but they would never discuss that with you. They were so damaged early on that they know no other way than to seek Adulation or obtain supply by hurting and devaluing others.
My life has been hard, I dated a bit, but the women I read into were so damaged, either always or after their divorce and the people they met after .
@@josephsimontacchi2285 thank you for sharing Joseph.
Hey brother almost like my story with ex- wife only 22 years in the marriage.. my pension I work 33 years gave her 10 1/2 year of my pension to the Narc guess what first wife was a Narc also these Narc love to cheat anyway first Narc die the beginning of the year I believe in karma…
Forget relationships with modern women at this stage. You didn’t learn your lesson? 🤷🏻♂️
Take it to court, prove it to the judge
Took me 10 and 20 years respectively to get clear and recover. I was devastated. I became deathly physically ill and got a LOT of help. Definitely self-isolated. Until I found out what a narcissist is, I was in the dark. I am just now coming out of it. Your insights are concise and on point - very clear and helpful. I thank you, Andrew!
Welcome 🙌😌🙏
Narcissist was the word I've been looking for my entire adult life. It suddenly had a name, and I suddenly knew it wasn't going to ever change. These people are what they are.
@@cc1k435 Same, I'm 55 years old & I never heard (and learned) that word till about 4 years ago .... Andrew & his channel here is outstanding! Blessing to you for loads of healing!
It takes such a long time. I'm glad I'm not only one challenged by this.
@@FieryKTarot You are not alone xxx
Being his maid with my paycheck. That's what he misses.
I stop listening to content like this once I started healing more... But I still have times where I feel low and wonder what is wrong with me... And something like this pops up and it really helps me get through these times. Thank you so much for your kind yet stern words. I really appreciate this channel.
Welcome 😌🙌💯
After a 9 year relationship and harsh discard, and 6 months of researching narcissism and trauma bonds, I discovered your site this morning and feel understood and better equipped to go forward 🙏
Welcome to the community..😌💯🙌😊
I hope your healing everyday, I am 7 months removed from a 7 year relationship with my narcissist ex and it's been rough but it's getting better. We are all here for each other, thank you for sharing. 🙏
I left my covert narcissist 3 days ago after 3 years... I've suffered every angle of narcissism & ashamed I stayed so long... I miss something but not him... my time now is to heal & flourish... I've learnt so much here!
I discarded a covert narcissist a couple of months ago. I realized that I missed who I thought the narcissist was, not who the narcissist Really was. Think about that.
This is a great channel. I have learned a lot from Andrew. The community is kind and supportive.
I wish you well with your path.
@Nikki G yes the planted seed of hope that didn't grow... out of the darkness of a narcissist realm I wish you happiness on your journey back to a vivid light...
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Good it was only 3 years
You are missing
You❤
His last words about me were 'she made my life miserable ' to our son. That was 26 years of being a slave and putting his needs before mine. Still wasnt able to find contentment. I am in good place now after years of abuse and slavery. He is still finding faults with the new supply the grass wasnt greener after all that. Im glad out of that chaos and drama.
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Parallel experience for me too. I think, however, my ex will chose to not move in with any new supply again, so that she wont see who he truly is, so that he wont find fault in her and so that he can continue dating lots of other women. Like you, Im just glad to be out of that chaos and drama (everyday).
The narcisists regret how we made them feel, what we did for them, what we gave them, how we provided for them - simply what supply we were. The truth will set us free. Thank you Andrew.
The narcissist regrets nothing.
They have no soul, no empathy, no regret. Nothing.
After 16 years & a child together, I found out the narc was cheating with someone he was seeing on the side, even brought her into my home to play house for a week while I was out of town. He denied all of it, even though I have audio /video recordings of it & is blaming me for cheating (never even thought about another man, I was so in love with him). He has done some awful things to me, even gaslighting to the point where he almost had me believing I was losing my mind & needed help!
Thank you so much for sharing your knowledge & insights. It’s helping me get through this very difficult time. I appreciate your help!
Welcome 🙌💯😌
Some of your story is similar to mine. I hated going on work trips. One time I was giving a presentation and I literally got sick from a whole different state! The narc had the nerve to bring that low life ho into my home to be with her. That is even worse than the act itself bc I see it as being a real devil
I don't know whether my narcissist thinks about me anymore or not, and I'm not sure I care. I know, however, that the experience opened an opportunity for me to learn about myself in ways I otherwise wouldn't have. The wounds we all experience through narcissistic abuse are like cuts into our souls. Ironically, those cuts aren't all bad. They become windows into ourselves that we wouldn't have made on our own. Thanks to the narcissists, we can now see deeper into ourselves and our souls. We now have understanding and truth, two of the most powerful things a person can possess.
We are all made of scars.
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Well said.. When I think about the first version of myself.. I was so lost, so weak, people pleaser, willing to do anything to make someone like me. Seeking approval, no idea what I WANT from life. Such a poor existence. Now I know all I need is myself and my own approval!
@@mmnde12 I’m glad you transformed into a self-loving, self-respecting person. Your life will be much happier. Thank you for sharing. - Joe
Yes! They (IMO) are meant to be the catalyst for your ultimate awakening 🙏🏻
I’ve never experienced such pain but pain is what causes us to have profound growth forces us to see the truth.
I’ve been saying this is the hardest thing I’ve ever endured although I’ve been through some really rough times this takes the cake BUT I am extremely grateful it has opened me up to my shadow and made me fearless!🖤✨
While we are learning a valuable lesson and becoming the best version of ourselves, the narcissist is and always will be stuck in their skewed perception false reality miserable; and fine tuning their manipulative skills only to remain stagnant.
We are victors not victims 🦋
I did everything for my ex. Any time she complained about something or had a problem....I fixed it and took care of it. Fixing the cars, house, take care of the dogs, constant back cracks and massages for her bad back, always attended all her family events, cooked and cleaned, etc. Literally everything. I stayed for way way too long and put up with way way too much bad behavior....behavior I never tolerated with anyone else and Im frankly ashamed of myself for it. I really thought she was the one and I wanted kids and a family with her.
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You are not alone. I felt/did the same. She's the one, kids, house, dog, etc. Only to find out that I was dating the worst person I ever met. I nicknamed her Satans mistress. They are demons and only want to drag you into the muck where they live.
Eh, wiser now and moving on.
I did the same, everything to keep peace in the house. I had to feed the kids before she got home from work so I would not have to listen to her yelling at the kids at the dinner table. She dumped every responsibility and chore on me including our kids. After 10 years of marriage, she had her affair and moved out on us. Her best gift for me was leaving me.
I can relate, was with her for 20 years. Did everything to provide, yet she still monkey branched to another man and lied and cheated throughout the ManipulationShit!
Just read my story of my life in your comment.
They (IMO) are meant to be the catalyst for your ultimate awakening 🙏🏻
I’ve never experienced such pain but pain is what causes us to have profound growth forces us to see the truth.
I’ve been saying this is the hardest thing I’ve ever endured although I’ve been through some really rough times this takes the cake BUT I am extremely grateful it has opened me up to my shadow and made me fearless!🖤✨
While we are learning a valuable lesson and becoming the best version of ourselves, the narcissist is and always will be stuck in their skewed perception false reality miserable; and fine tuning their manipulative skills only to remain stagnant.
We are victors not victims 🦋
@RT-qp3jlYes!! 👍❤️
Good call on that. Thank you
Well said ❤
I wasn’t going to watch this video, because I COULDN’T CARE LESS about what the narcissist thinks about me or even THAT she thinks about me, but I wanted to do my part in supporting a great guy who has been there for our community. Thanks for the ego stroke, and thanks always for your kind and thoughtful insights, Andrew. ❤
Welcome 😌❤️😊
🤣😂
Yessss
Andrew- you are so spot on! You are humble and direct, experienced, wise and generous! I appreciate you tremendously. I am grateful for YT’s algorithm sending you to me today!!! Best man with narc knowledge 💛👍🙏
I had to get rid of flying monkeys and this included some family members. I am not on social media period. I have a peaceful life now. ❤❤❤❤
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I ran into my ex-husband Narc at McDonald’s in 2019. I heard him on the phone in a booth as I walked in, never turning to look at him.
There was no one else in the lobby. I had to wait a long time to get my coffee.
I walked out the door near the counter, never once looking back at him near the opposite wall and took a path all the way around the outside of the building to get to my car.
I drove off.
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Way to go!
Best move ever!😅
Very good!!👏
It's important to me that I don't regret anything about them.
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Don't waste that energy ✌️
Good attitude.
@@artluvr6170 It's not an attitude, but I really feel that way. It is difficult for many to understand.
@@artluvr6170 I'm not writing phrases here. I always write what I feel.
My narc regrets I am making him accountable for adult behaviors and have EXPOSED his childish behaviors to the community. ( He has been displaying his temper tantrums in public. ) 😔
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Ditto! I'm making him pay child support. 'You didnt have to do that', he said. Well, yes I did, because I didnt want to keep chasing him down for money, having to keep in contact with him, still under his control.
@@TheSeekeroftruth1 Not my experience but my sister's experience. ( Late 70's early 80's $15/ week 2 kids in diapers. ) He didn't even pay that and it was court ordered. 🙄 Didn't really cover the cost of ANYTHING. NOT DIAPERS, NOT FORMULA, NOTHING. 😔
Your videos are keeping me going. I feel down and I just watch one and I wake up again to fight and start.
Thank you very much.
Welcome..💜😌🙏
The ex narc regrets taking advantage and thinking I was stupid & too in love to figure him out. I blocked, discarded and went NC without looking back.
I've said it before and will say it again : this narcissist, my now ex husband, will NEVER find anyone who cared about him as much as I did or will do as much for him as i did with the amount of effort i did. If he ever has any regrets sorry, that's his problem. He had almost 7 years to be a true husband, a true friend but he chose to use me for money, for personal gain, as someone to put credit cards and loans for him in my name meanwhile he was running around with whoever doing whatever, never had any time for me only excuses.
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With three different narcissistic exes, I had the opportunity to observe them from a distance when they believed they were alone and were unaware anyone was observing. In all three instances, they appeared emotionally dead. There was no joy in them. They were like black holes waiting for the next human to come into their orbit. I had believed the love was in them, but it had been coming from me.
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Good analogy. My ex narc never seemed happy. If he was, it was pretense.
@@Hatbox948mine had a whiteboard in his room with various goals, projects, trips & finances .. and on the bottom is “Stay Happy!!!”… must be his reminder to pretend that he is happy and to keep the facade of happiness at all times…
Yes just an empty vessel. So sad. Grateful to be away from them forever.😊 TGBTG
I was nothing more but a servant and a sex slave. I was given the “I care about you “ card , before the discard I was given the “ I want to keep you in my life because you’re older and I have questions “ card. “I want to stay friends “ card. Was given the “I want to live with you let’s get a place together “ card. I probably have more but I’m going through the been discarded totally, which is fine except I’m emotionally exhausted.
Hang in there. You are not alone in where you are on your recovery journey. I'm so glad you had the courage & strength it took (& I KNOW it took a lot!) to reach out & post a helpful comment.
Thank you!
Stay safe, remain sane, be YOUR best self TO yourself. Best of luck to you, sister.
@@shivasgirl1609 Thank you for being supportive, it’s people like you on here that have helped me as well as the individuals who make the videos. My freedom is coming, I can feel it 👍and then it’s moving forward to live my best life 🥰
@@emilykathleenn absolutely and the future faking. I even got the smear campaign up at the ski lodge, I was supposed to be the stalker because women just won’t leave him alone, yeah right. I saw more nice looking women give him the brush off when ever he would flirt and then deny it. One gal actually waved him away and I knew exactly why. I kind of laughed about that to myself. When he was finally caught with both of us girls in the same restaurant and he backed out I confronted him and he got upset with accusing me of he wasn’t allowed to have other friends. Everything this jerk was saying from the getgo was all lies. My bff said that it’s better for me because now he can be someone else’s problem 🤣🤣😂🤭. Sounds like a better plan for me 👍I’m still having to deal with the mental abuse I endured, I’m sure I’ll get through 😂
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That was me. Servant and sex slave. My body wasn't my own. It was disgusting. He even asked to come back for sex while seeking and having new supply. How pathetic. And they actually think you want them back for that. Omg
They have to live with themselves 24/7!! It sucks being them. I love God I love myself and he couldn't take that away from me. Demonic behavior that I had to rebuke.
Each time I've been kicked to the crub I've picked myself up, brushed myself off and moved forward without them. Surprise 😊 I'm still here. ✌️🙏😇💯
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You are the best Andrew you have helped me in so many ways I tell people to watch you God Bless❤
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With all due respect, I don't see them as human beings. What makes us humanoid and sets us apart from other beings is humanity.
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I see them as robotic playing the same programme over and over, no insight or introspection to grow or learn from mistakes, due the deep shame instinctively motivating all their behaviour and keeping the mask in place.
@@SLS64 they ARE robotic. I agree. There are nobody there.
@@rubyjet9513 I see them, Ruby, as evil with evil intent.
@@margaretrussell7202 I understand you. Me too.
Every narcs i had in my life broke my trust and that's why i will never take them back in my life. That's a done deal folks. Great video Andrew thank you. ❤😊
Thank you 😌🙏💯🙌
Every narc left me out for dead hanging to pick up the piece's and to achieve my potential
@@kisigma1011 🤗💪🙌🙏
@@muffy6774 🤗👍🙏
One of the good things about reaching the "pinnacle of indifference " is that you do not care if the narcissist has regrets or not. You simply don't care. I do most definitely remember the days when I did wonder if the narcissist regretted leaving. I knew in my heart that he must have, because I did know that I gave everything I had. Not everyone does that. As you always say Andrew, each day brings you closer & closer to realizing who the narcissist is. They weren't having a bad year, they weren't stressed, they won't go back to who they were in the beginning. That was an act. They never were that person. My friends, you will realize this one day. Be patient with yourselves. Thank you Andrew for doing a video on what a lot of people are wondering. God bless 🙂
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Not everyone does that! So flipping true ❤️
I really did a lot for the relationship, until I realized that MY LOYALTY BECAME SLAVERY !
It will be difficult for him, to find another replacement.I don't know, if he has any regrets or feelings, I was just a posession not a real independent person for him.
It doesn't matter!
Thx for this powerful video, Andrew❤😊🌞
Welcome 🙌😌🙏💯
You DO matter ❤
“my loyalty became slavery” . . . whew, I am gonna have to sit with THAT statement because that is hitting REALLY close to home.🤔🤔🤔🤔🙏🏾
For 40 years and now I am just learning this.
You will, and God bless❤
My first indication that they are indeed a narc. is indifference to peoples emotions.
At times it looks like empathy, but its only empathy when the narc still needs something
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it's hard to believe that they can be that insensitive. My ex passed it off as being "honest".
I had a Phoenix tattooed on my thigh years ago.
I had three Letters K, S, L tattooed on my wrist - Knowledge, Strength and Love. I always knew the letters would play a role I just didnt know how. The past few years I realized it was a map of my journey here. That I was first to gain Knowledge by going thru life's Trying experiences, I was then going to need to find my Strength in order to move past and Thrive after those experience's and IF I was able to do that, I would find what I crave most, Love and Self Love.
Finding your channel a month after I ended a toxic relationship as A Supply source and I KNOW I was meant to see this and be here and damn thats hard to say but Ive been watching you ALL day and I know you are part of that journey and Im SO VERY GRATEFUL FOR YOU. THANK YOU
'These people don't have a life of their own '...
I credit you for literally saving my mental health! Your spot on ! I mean it's scary how on point you are. God bless you
Thank you..😌🙏💜💪
You're 100% on point Andrew, if you were to interview me you would be stunned.
I've endured being married to a narcissist for 39 years and she is just toxic, I'm going to divorce her in a few weeks and get my sanity back along with my happiness.
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How did your divorce go Peter. ?
Mine was a nightmare.
They will never find another you...
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I was his everything, he’s already regretting. He said I can’t believe I lost you.
Believe IT!
They fall in love with you again, but only when you completely change everything about yourself and in yourself, your appearance, put a smile back on your face, etc. That's what Sam Vaknin claims.
🤔🤔
@@NARCDAILYYouAreNotAlone Yes, I can send you a link if you want.
@@rubyjet9513 send hun want to see
@@NARCDAILYYouAreNotAlone Andrew, to them we are just snapshot 😅 they took at the first second they see us. They see us as a static image.
@@palomahair8616 It's deleting the link. I'll give you the name of the video.
Even a family member told me that what he was doing was abuse. It took me 12 years, and now I still deal with many issues. But with God's help, prayers, and support I can go on.
Ive been there and still picking up the pieces.. im not gona waste my time on mentally trying to figure out everyone anymore . I just stay away from these people. Alot of messed up people too .
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You WILL get through this! Keep educating yourself and watching as many videos as you can. I was a shell of myself after my ex narc discarded me after 4 1/2 years and a 2 year engagement. I honestly thought I had gone crazy, didn’t know who I was and cried almost every day. I immersed myself in watching videos and gathering as much information as I could. It’s been a month and 2 days since my discard and I’m finally feeling like my old self before she came into my life. Had to go no contact and haven’t looked back. It’s no easy task but what will help is knowing you’re not alone!! It also helps to not take it so personally once you know how the narcissist’s mind works. Still hurts badly but it’s easier knowing how their sick minds work
It's been six years and ten months since I left the narcissist. And every day I live my life freely and joyfully. Thank you, Andrew, for this video. You're right about these evil people. I hope everyone have a blessed day. Stay strong. We are beautiful, loving and compassionate.
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What was regretted most by the narcissist is why couldn't I be the person I am after the narc relationship during the time I was in the relationship. Namaste. 🙏 ❤️
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One might think that narcissists are a few, but sometimes one is surrounded by them. Not only socially but also in family circle.
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Things got way unbalanced dealing with the Narc(s). Earlier days of naivete- "There are givers and takers." No one wants to be labeled as an obvious "taker" and Narcs are good at disguising that. Where "giving" too much got way out of hand for myself, I'm working on better boundaries. Little did I know about narcissism that goes 500 fathoms deeper in mind games, manipulation and cruelty, than most who haven't experienced it, realize.. I feel it's like a war of attrition- an empath can recover energy and recharge upon getting out, but the narc will eventually wear down.👍🙏
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"Who you are, what you provided - your honor, your dignity, your integrity, your courage, your strength, your resilience, your empathy"... Is what they'll never have. Is what they'll never be. Remember these words. Thank you, Andrew. ❤️
Love to you all, fellow survives! and thrivers! You are not alone! 💞
Welcome 🙏💯❤️
@@NARCDAILYYouAreNotAlone Thank you! ❤️
All I know, is he will never find a more devoted woman than I was to him....
My ex will never find a one like me either
I always said, I was devoted to a fault
Narcissists are spiritually damaged children living in adult bodies and the age of the child you perceive inside is the age at which they were hurt so badly (usually by a parent) that they shut down inside and never moved past it.
And as a hurt child living with all the responsibility of an adult life, they are so full of fear and pain that their existence is nothing BUT fear and pain.
This leaves a lot of room for dark thoughts, bad energy and even demons. This is a horrible place to be, so when they treat you badly, just have compassion for their pain and know where they are coming from... you are dealing with a hurt little child, possibly dominated by a nasty force speaking for them and even enslaving them to keep them locked up where they are, whilst it treats you like crap ie you aren't really talking to them, ur talking to what ever they unknowingly let in their door which promised them a sense of power.
This doesn't mean that you shouldn't protect yourself from their behaviour, just have compassion for their position as well, coz regardless of the pain you are in, they are in much greater pain and will be forever until a greater force heals them.
For this, God is the only source of healing here...
Thank you for writing that. You exactly described the man I loved but had to leave. I had so much compassion for him. He was so child-like at times. So hurt and wounded from his mother. I have prayed (and fasted) so much for God's healing touch and still do. But the passive aggressive silent treatments, throwing things in a tantrum, insulting me. I was so good to him. But it was never enough. His friends always told him; 'she's too good for you' They saw it. He had been through a lot. But so have I. And like you said, it was almost like the demons who tormented him were attacking me. I stayed 4.5 years.
Thanks~ best ive read so far__
@@chicagogal I know exactly what you're saying... I stayed 30 yrs and i still love him as a friend but he has his free will and that can't ever be taken from him so...
I only know all this becoz i felt so compelled to truly understand what they were, being born to 1, raised by a 2nd, married a 3rd, left and met a 4th, and i began to see a pattern!!! 😅
I drove everyone around me insane for 18 months until a finally grasped the entire concept of it, and that comment was the short version encapsulation of it all.
And i felt it extremely important that i understood it so well becoz narcissists grow up to create narcissists out of their children which means this world is being covered in them right now and soon our species will be nothing BUT narcissists and that's a difficult place to live in... "critical and hard to deal with" to be more precise.
I'm glad i helped you...
In the end they lose everything
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Thank you for your videos, you have helped me so much. I know my ex still thinks about me no doubt. I treated him like a king. My loving caring nature. He never had that in his relationships. He never reciprocated... He would always belittle me, degrade me, make a fool of me , manipulate and try and control me. His ex wife cheated on him numerous times then divorced him... Oh well as the saying goes. I didn't lose him he lost me... See how that works for him.
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Thank you for another great video, Andrew. I know that the biggest regret the narcissist has regarding me is that I watched videos on RUclips and found out about narcissism. After finding out the truth, I made a plan. I discarded them. I don’t think the narcissist’s life is filled with rainbows or puppies or kittens. 😊 I’m thrilled that they are not a part of my life. With every passing day, I’m becoming empowered and stronger.
God bless all of us. 🌈👍🦋🦅😺🐶🕊️
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@NikkiGRocks4Ever I just finished reading your comment and as I started rejoicing, I got a revelation from the Lord Jesus Christ. I don't know what you believe spiritually but I felt compelled to share this. The Lord just made me understand that in His mercy, He heard our cries - us, the multitudes who have been victimized by narcissists. He caused these teachers on here to really, really understand narcissists, help us understand the narcs too and to help us heal. Meanwhile, we get the community in the comments section so we can encourage each other and know we are not alone and there is light at the end of the tunnel. The Lord is saying that it is not the RUclips income, books or courses they may sell but they truly have received grace to help us whether or not we can pay for it. So they give us grace. These RUclips content creators are the mother and father I never had. In the comment section, I find the brothers and sisters I never had as I only had one sibling, a narcissist sister!
One evening, after the worst terror from my narcissist mom for 50 years, I cried out to the Lord Jesus in utter despair. The next evening, He led me to search RUclips and before you now it, I was watching these videos. That was last December. I had no idea I was dealing with a malignant narcissist. Now I know what's up! The Lord had reminded me to focus on my one perfect parent, my heavenly Father. That plus this RUclips community of empathetic teachers who teach us, counsel us, love us and fellow survivors is one of the best things that's ever happened to me. Thank You Jesus!
I dumped social media right before I vanished from my personal narcissist's life - she's not my narcissist anymore and I pity the flying monkey that acquired her.
It has really bugged me that this could happen to me, though I knew my value. I'd had a happy marriage of 46 years, and my husband passed. My Mom passed, and my two siblings who had discarded me when I married, returned with lawyers. It has been hard to get free of them because of the law firms. But I've stayed strong, and am coming through a challenging time period. I have been bashed. Never would have believed that this would have happened. But I am seeing that it is a spiritual path. I am doing this, and will take the lessons with me.
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It's always hard, & a shame, when family comes back into the picture via lawyers. It's tough. Hang in there. 💪
Thanks Andrew. It still amazes me how this happened..I would have never thought But when I look back at the last 2 AND a half years I am just totally stunned. I'm a giver I know how to love. I'm a yes man I take care of people because it makes me feel good..I get that SICK FEELING in my guts..😢
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Exactly how I am feeling too. I can't believe that my son and I went through all of it. Kept forgiving and trying. BE WELL!
@@sunshinedawn1444 I'm sorry..💖
I got a Hoover last weekend and he told me that he’s slow but he gets it now, and all good!! Wow! The way he had turned it all around on me! He’s the one that started ghosting me off and on 7 months ago! Now I didn’t answer his message he’s mad so I most likely won’t hear from him again. Thank God I found your channel. Thank you Andrew 🙏💪
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Proverbs 10:7 the memory of righteous is a blessing but the name of the wicked shall rot 🙏
Common sense, sound judgment and following Christ is the way ❤
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Wow! Another strong empowering message, saying it how it is. Thank you Andrew.
Come on guys, we’ve got this 💪🏼🙏🧚🏼♀️
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Great video Andrew. I eventually woke up to the fact that I was devalued and discarded on a regular basis. I gave to a fault but not anymore, the fountain has been turned off. One suggestion I have for ppl is to keep a journal and review it from time to time. Keeps you from lying to yourself. When you see the negatives out weighing the positives, it’s time to do your own discard.
Thank you 🙌🙏😌❤️
This is great advice. And a calendar, to see patterns to events. There's no denial after a while when it's ongoing, right in front of you through the months & years.
& keep it private if the narc is on site because they'll use it againstU
@@kimgordon3695 yes, great point.
Journaling is what helped me to wake up to the abuse.
All Narcs from my past are trying to hoover me right now on Facebook. Blocking them is so much fun for me 😂😂😄
Listening to alot of these videos an reading many of the comments I have more clearity of what the experience was like. Being trama bonded to the narc I could not see the empaths that crossed my path. Some had reached out to me but I was so wrapped up with the narc that I could not respond . I like to think I have a better roadmap to guide me now. There are many beautiful people that care and are willing to walk this journey called life with us. If there were not this channel would not exist. So much hope here with all of you! Thanks Andrew for opening the door for all of us!
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It is so sad when you realise the nark never cared about you 💔
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I left a narcissist in 2008 and I’m recovered now. In my healing process I had other narcissistic relationships and had to look at childhood trauma and dealt with complex PTSD from childhood abuse and neglect and it’s a process and the first narcissist I experienced was my mother and it conditioned me for other narcissistic relationships.
114 K views here Andrew! ☝️☝️😉💯🎉🙌🥰❤️❤️❤️ Coming up on 200K subs before too long!!! 👏👏👏😁 SO PROUD of you and what you’ve created here!!! 🙏🙏🙏☺️
I’m loving the timing of the bin collection in the background !! Throwing out the trash 😅taking the rubbish away !
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Good fences make good neighbors. Set sensible boundaries and stop rescuing people. The only thing my ex misses about me is my credit card.
People of the lie by Scott Peck.
So fits with the narcissist!
Thank you Andrew. You were telling my story.
Some narcissists are providers. Then they can control you by saying hey I support you
True
In the early days I used to wonder did he ever think of me now I really don’t care I know what he lost I’m the one that got away re found myself never to fall for lies and manipulation & control, I can sleep at peace knowing that I’m moving forward in life with only good intentions towards anyone. 🙏💕
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One of the last statements my malevolent narcissistic mother made on her death bed was “I fucked up”. This was told to me by one of her flying monkeys (sister) as I had gone no contact months before!…. I just wonder if she meant her entire life or just me “my precious one”lol .. whatever I sure did get the last laugh 😅.
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Lol super glue the mask 😂
Luv your videos everything is so true
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They are heartless, soulless... even formless. The purest form of evil to render such pain onto others. There is no justice for the pain I feel. No consolation for my tears. No soothing to this bottomless sadness. I want vengeance... I want this suffering to stop.
Please, find a way to forgive. I know it's hard. I'm going thru the same thing. But, let God be your justice. He will bring you thru a d give you someone who will treat you with the respect you deserve
Before I got the education; when I was discarded, I chalked it up to that we couldn't live together harmoniously; and that whoever she was going off to (yes she hinted at it to hurt me) that they weren't going to love her. I was aware of how much poor behavior I put up with, and also that I stood on my head and did cartwheels for her- to no avail- I knew that hope in the relationship was misguided but I tried anyways. Whatever superficial supply she hopped onto- was doomed. Then I got the education and holy smokes! And yes btw I did accept a hoover 6 months post discard before I knew what a hoover was- guys don't go there- a hoover is only meant to use you again to prop up their ego for a very short amount of time only to subsequently grind you into the ground- much much worse than you ever thought possible. It's PURE EVIL- DON'T FALL FOR IT! I almost didn't make it- I even had a plan- yup- I did; I didn't want to be here anymore- I wanted it to stop. DON'T GO THERE!!!
You have to find the courage to stop replaying their lies in your head. It's very difficult- but your'e worth saving. At one point I had a dream that I ran into my 8yo self- and he was so beautiful, innocent, and uncorrupted- he just wanted to run and play and he didn't recognize me at all- I was a complete stranger to him. It was very profound. But it motivated me to get back to being who I AM, and not the person the narcissist tried to insidiously gaslight me into believing I was.
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I often think of that innocent little girl,I was, I could see her dressed in shorts,cotton top,bangles,gold, on her wrist sitting on a brick wall .looking out,so innocent,,I would love to meet her in my dreams..she was a lovely child back then...hold her hands and tell her I am sorry for the pain,and regrets.
❤ thank you for educating survivors of abuse
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Good afternoon Andrew 🥰. SUPER GLUE😁, good one!! That's what us as Empaths do,SUPER GLUE our path forward and NEVER look back👍. Thank you, Andrew,you are definitely and absolutely a life saver. Take care,God bless 🙏 and much love💖🥰💞
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They are such good actors. It's so easy to believe them until those red flags start showing and you stay lonely and confused.
Andrew, your videos do me so good. My best nourishment in times of pain, doubts or lonely moments.
I always feel better after I listened to you.
Thank you ever so much.
Life is becoming better and better each day.
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#THIS^
It was a long journey through hell but by the grace of GOD I TRAVELED THE ROAD OUT… I’d love to have my Akashic records read regarding this part of my earthly sojourn. One way or another in time or out of time I will eventually know and understand.😊
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You are a good man, trying to help others. Keep up your great work. We need more people like yourself in this world. Narcs are a dangerous beings and are deasroyers of the Love, trust, and beauty of life and this world, balance is always achieved eventually.
Take care all who are suffering out there. God bless and peace to you all.
Thank you, Andrew, for this great succinct and educational video. I was married nearly 38 years to a narcissist and finally, SAFELY, got out 4 years ago. God opened my eyes to what a narcissist is, thanks to my daughter directing me to a book on this personality disorder. I am now educated, have gone no contact with his flying monkeys out there, as well, and have moved on the other side of the country! God has healed me from false guilt and the self -condemnation for why I stayed so long in the relationship. I thank Him that He is helping me move forward in His grace and enabling me to live my best life in His wisdom, while encouraging other survivors of narcissistic abuse!
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As I was told before YES BLOCK…YES BE SAFE…YES DEAD WEIGHT --DROP IT !!… AnD LAST ‘FLUSH’ !!!
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I loved this! Mine never apologized about anything! Lol! Always talking about how little time he has left on the planet, down to hours! I just yawn! Lol!
He always was trying to impress everyone! His great career, etc. Yawn! He even left again for a blonde, blue eyed woman, 21 years younger, who made him feel alive again..🤮 The more of your videos, I watch, the more I realize he is a 100% narcissist. I am proud to be an Empath, though at times, it can be a painful thing to be...
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I think that when the Narc notices that you are too smart, powerful and nooot to be mind controlled... He/she knows and discards you and moves on to another victim.. So sad, sick pple.
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oh yeah and a few others did warn me..I was blinded...but as you say eventually they reveal themselves...the con man cant con forever
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Taking all the vehicles to be inspected, serviced, etc ❣️
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I am incredibly strong minded, yet there were moments I questioned my mental state! Never again 😤
I am not on any social media. None.
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I didn't find my out of the fog until I was 65 years young! I'm my own person now. No longer put up with anyone's bulls**t! Blessings, Andrew. ❤
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Ohhhh how I pray that he regrets hurting and losing me every single day and night! I rlly do! 😤💪🙏
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Yes you so right because im in relationship with that kind person
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Great video Andrew. Yes after the discard i had to climb out of a really dark place, my heart and soul were broken i had no clue if I was going to make it. I did make it but i had to literally disappear from the narcissist. No social media i moved away i left everything behind i turned my phone off for about 4 months. It's taken alot of work some good days and some bad , but the difference is that now things don't seem so bad. And i can walk away and do what i want read go to a movie and i answer to nobody but myself. What my ex narcissist is doing or thinking i really don't care anymore he can stay where he is. Thank you everyone for your kind words and thank you Andrew for the video.
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Thank you so much for spreading your light! As an empath unfortunately I am a magnet for these creatures! I am systematically ending all those relationships except my father who is in his 80s, and with multiple medical issues and I am his care giver. 😢
Andrew this is a great topic Saturday the narcissist called me and said that I let my volleyball team down I said who-do-you-think-you-are to tell me what to do are you my father I said don't you ever tell me what to do again I said you don't care about anyone but yourself after I got off the phone with the narcissist I felt really good about myself
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@@NARCDAILYYouAreNotAlone no thank you Andrew