The REAL reason why you are so anxious at work.

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  • Опубликовано: 21 ноя 2024

Комментарии • 534

  • @chandrikadas9163
    @chandrikadas9163 Год назад +321

    That's EXACTLY how I feel. I feel like I'm stupid, I don't seem to GET things quickly, in a new role, I'm a mess. I feel like I'm not smart enough, not good enough, it's just so hard feeling this way. Anxiety is soul destroying. I hope i can get through this.

    • @user-eg1xw6rj3k
      @user-eg1xw6rj3k Год назад +38

      Just know that you're not alone in feeling that way. I feel that way at work too, even though I know I'm intelligent. I'm sure you're smart, but the way we're often forced to learn at work isn't conducive to efficient learning. It can be hard to pick things up at work but that doesn't mean you're not smart.

    • @chandrikadas9163
      @chandrikadas9163 Год назад +6

      @@user-eg1xw6rj3k thank you for such comforting words. ❤

    • @enlightenment5279
      @enlightenment5279 11 месяцев назад +19

      I start a new job Tuesday and thought about writing before even starting because I feel like I’m incompetent. The anxiety alone is paralyzing. It takes me forever to learn new things and I want to save myself the frustration and embarrassment. I’m bracing for anything and everything.

    • @prabhatjoshi-hg2te
      @prabhatjoshi-hg2te 9 месяцев назад +1

      i am feeling same and dont have idea what to do. this job is new and i am taking time to learn

    • @chandrikadas9163
      @chandrikadas9163 9 месяцев назад +10

      @@prabhatjoshi-hg2te i truly understand, but I promise , it will get better, with time. For me, I think I feel worse when managers seem a little harsh and not very understanding. But, please put the effort in and you'll see a difference. Try to be patient with yourself and have faith in time it will all come together. Wishing you all the best of luck 🙏

  • @ProfoundFamiliarity
    @ProfoundFamiliarity Год назад +34

    Erin doesn't understand that for most people, job security does equate to food, shelter and survival.

  • @blackbellanow
    @blackbellanow Год назад +552

    When I do a good job at work, I feel relieved. I never feel joy. A few weeks ago you asked me if I ever felt like I was doing a good job and I honestly answered “no”. I live in a headspace on constant evaluation of what I’m doing wrong. I’ve been strong arm ing my way through, but I am severely depressed. I feel very trapped and pulled in several directions.

    • @sarahlee8832
      @sarahlee8832 Год назад +49

      It’s because we have heard so many stories of people getting fired especially in the recession we are in right now and doing a good job just only feels like the minimum expectation. Companies put so much blame for even a small mistake.

    • @brendansstorytime7552
      @brendansstorytime7552 Год назад +14

      Omg we are the same 😢

    • @BillyBob-xw8kf
      @BillyBob-xw8kf Год назад +34

      You have articulated how I have felt and still feel having worked in the corporate world for 20 years. All of my behaviours is fear based related to real life financial stress.

    • @tomrushton8038
      @tomrushton8038 10 месяцев назад +7

      Yeah guys I’m the same. On an apprenticeship and I’m already messing up and I’m trapped in my head and don’t wanna tell my parents because they’re gonna be pissed. I keep getting upset but people around me tell me not to worry

    • @MsSimpleMovies
      @MsSimpleMovies 9 месяцев назад

      ​@@tomrushton8038 Your know your parents better than I do. But, I'm always trying to drum it in my children's heads: Come talk to us, because we're your most loyal and committed friends. You don't need to impress me. I'm the coach behind the scenes, helping you to navigate out there in the world. At home, please share your struggles, because we've got the benefit of perspective. Let us help!

  • @speaklife9176
    @speaklife9176 10 месяцев назад +86

    I have so much anxiety about work, I have panic attacks the night before work. Thank you for this video.

    • @donalmadigan2930
      @donalmadigan2930 Месяц назад +1

      Sorry to hear, hope you're doing better now

  • @na27000
    @na27000 Год назад +134

    I feel my anxiety at work comes mainly due to lack of knowledge and proper training. I do my best to be prepare for the calls with my clients but I aleays feel that I don't know enough or as much as I should and therefore I just constantly want to quit.

    • @Lizzys125
      @Lizzys125 10 месяцев назад +12

      Omg, i'm literally feeling the same way. I haven't got proper training. It feels like if i learn something or someone is calling me out for something i didn't know or they have never told me proper skills. It feels like im a failure and i had to know certain things. But unfortunately i started with nothing expierence or training, but i will never give my new colleague so much lack of training.

    • @na27000
      @na27000 10 месяцев назад +7

      @@Lizzys125 I always help the newbies but not everyone has the same luck unfortunately. I hope it gets easy for you, wishing you all the best in 2024.

    • @Lizzys125
      @Lizzys125 10 месяцев назад +1

      Thankyou!@@na27000 wishing you also all the best wishes for 2024 🫶!!

    • @annafringetree
      @annafringetree 7 месяцев назад +6

      You summed up exactly how I feel and function at my job.

    • @inkling00
      @inkling00 5 месяцев назад +6

      That’s me right now at my new job! Manager got fired & colleague quit, so it’s been a struggle figuring out how things work!

  • @danny-li6io
    @danny-li6io 11 месяцев назад +247

    Anyone who has the self awareness, courage, and desire to watch a video like this is very likely doing so much better than they think. I would call that being a very conscientious and caring person who unfortunately is constantly scrutinizing, comparing, and criticizing themselves. Employers and coworkers LOVE that, as opposed to the 80% who are way too arrogant or just insulated by their pride/egos to improve themselves or to even care. Don’t be so hard on yourself.

  • @jackieburns5257
    @jackieburns5257 2 года назад +286

    Anxiety caused by the possible financial impact of job loss happens, so it really is tied to survival.

    • @AlannaEMurdoch
      @AlannaEMurdoch Год назад +21

      I thought about that too. However if I did get fired I know I wouldn't be out of work long I would look for a job until I found one. Even if it wasn't in the same industry. yes it would make me sad but I would survive

    • @ATMcGWriter
      @ATMcGWriter Год назад +20

      @@AlannaEMurdoch I think you are totally right. We don’t give ourselves enough credit for how resilient and adaptive we are.

    • @Highlander9740
      @Highlander9740 Год назад +5

      @@ATMcGWriter I agree. We always find a way.

    • @gwenwalden-coker8608
      @gwenwalden-coker8608 Год назад +6

      I’m one month in to my first job in 3 1/2 yrs /covid when I lost my job. All day at work I worry about losing this job. I get stuck on a certain task then I’m in a constant cycle of negative thoughts “I can’t do this. I should know this. I should be quicker. The trainer thinks I’m too slow.” I can do the job…but once I get in that headspace it’s almost impossible to get out of it.

    • @lokendrakumar16
      @lokendrakumar16 Год назад

      ⁠Is there any solution you find for this problem?

  • @ChinaDoll305
    @ChinaDoll305 2 года назад +54

    I am off and thinking about work! I hate it

    • @YolandaMaphosa
      @YolandaMaphosa Месяц назад +1

      I am thinking how am I going to have a life outside this job

  • @pattykogei1577
    @pattykogei1577 6 месяцев назад +21

    Started a new job recently. Aced the interview however can’t stop making mistakes. My boss outright asked if I had help with the interview. And my anxiety just ballooned. During the meetings my jaws are tightly clenched and I can’t stop thinking of how incompetent I am to the point of wanting to die in order to stop doing this job. And side note is I didn’t get sufficient training and my bosses are aware of this - so the pressure for my work to be a homerun is also self-imposed and I don’t know how to stop it.

    • @leahmay1506
      @leahmay1506 Месяц назад +1

      Literally the same thing happened to me! My interview was a BREEZE! I’m still in training, but it’s only a couple of days long, even though I feel like I should be shadowed for at least a full week before starting! It feels very unfortunate to me.

  • @gypsyaspen1297
    @gypsyaspen1297 2 года назад +59

    People get called dumb when they have performance anxiety and trying to people please

    • @tonyacanada
      @tonyacanada 2 года назад +13

      RIGHT!!!!!!! Which is why I hate asking for help often and that gives me anxiety.

    • @LavaRoo
      @LavaRoo 3 месяца назад +1

      ​@@tonyacanadaand being scolded that you didn't learn that specific thing at all when you asked.

    • @Traysee379
      @Traysee379 3 месяца назад

      I get so mad and anxious at our meetings a lot of times. I do think it’s my issue with anxiety that is causing it. Because we have meetings every month about issues that can be solved if management would get in there and make people accountable for not doing their job. I do mines and then some.

  • @cdawnlewis
    @cdawnlewis 4 года назад +393

    I’m literally in awe of how on point this was for me!! I thought I was crazy for having such high anxiety that no one seemed to understand. Thank you so much!!

    • @RodneyBrown
      @RodneyBrown 2 года назад +8

      Same here!

    • @ladylefteye
      @ladylefteye 2 года назад +5

      Me too

    • @glen458
      @glen458 2 года назад +4

      100% agree It hit home with me as well

    • @mariyanedelcheva2967
      @mariyanedelcheva2967 Год назад +4

      Same. I thought I am the only one.

    • @dr6124
      @dr6124 Год назад +2

      Have you gotten any better? Asking for a friend... 😄

  • @crystalpowell8619
    @crystalpowell8619 5 месяцев назад +14

    I get so nervous I lose my ability to catch my errors. Thank you for this.

  • @MyPieceOfPeace24
    @MyPieceOfPeace24 2 года назад +42

    I thought I'm the only one who's experiencing it. I'm really super stressed because of work lately😔 that I sometimes question myself worth.

  • @lenhan1125
    @lenhan1125 2 года назад +82

    If ur in this situation you know how hard it is to actually function in the workplace, although deep down you know ur not that stupid and you can do it. Its a struggle, but journey to overcome it starts now

  • @jasmina3753
    @jasmina3753 3 года назад +18

    When you say this loud, it kind of feels like a relief.

  • @jalu8334
    @jalu8334 3 года назад +53

    My anxiety is fuelled by the fact I can't read over 1 page, I have mental fatigue when I read due to the fact I struggle to understand what I read. My understanding tends to be limited and I usually misunderstand what I read. I don't remember what I read, don't even get clarification after asking thousands questions...and my writing sucks, I have to write many document and often don't know where to start and to write. It seems everyone writing is best than me, and my Manager told me that my coworker is a good writer that made my anxiety go up as I know I lack that skill.

    • @hejhhopp
      @hejhhopp 2 года назад +3

      I feel like this is something I could have written a couple of years ago. I hope you are doing better now!

  • @Skyedior324
    @Skyedior324 Год назад +22

    I watched this right before work and it was spot on! I always get anxiety 20 minutes before clocking in and it would carry on throughout the day and take it home with me. My boyfriend always says to not let things affect me and I always tell him I wish I knew how to turn it off, so this really helps me identify the feelings I’m having and how to fix it ❤

  • @missk8teu
    @missk8teu 2 года назад +99

    Sitting here on a Sunday afternoon under a weighted blanket trying to calm down after a full on day....on Friday. I've had anxiety all weekend. I started a new job 7 weeks ago and i feel i cant cope.
    I feel slightly better after watching this

    • @Highlander9740
      @Highlander9740 Год назад +9

      I hope you feel better now. God bless you. I have been there.

    • @dorettaholloway8750
      @dorettaholloway8750 Год назад +2

      I just feel for you. I am in the same situation. Fearing Monday

    • @rikitadsouza6410
      @rikitadsouza6410 10 месяцев назад

      Me just 2 weeks in struggling !

    • @BMWS1000RRR
      @BMWS1000RRR 8 месяцев назад

      how are you doing now ?

    • @AuntieWendy
      @AuntieWendy 3 месяца назад

      Oh wow same 7weeks in performance anxiety hitting strong

  • @Martlin
    @Martlin Год назад +27

    Someone told me once that you need to mentally defend yourself just as if you were an attorney instead of convicting yourself for every little thing. I need to practice that more, but this was a great video. Thank you for giving me even more tools to work with.

  • @smokymom7670
    @smokymom7670 3 года назад +76

    I just started my new job week ago in new role and it stressed me out to the point of crying. I never thought about cause of my anxiety was because of primitive survival. I want to able to over come my work anxiety so I can be productive and feel confident.

    • @mstwelvedeadlycyns
      @mstwelvedeadlycyns Год назад +1

      Do not put so much effort into it. Ask for help from those that will. Give them a deadline when work needs to be done.
      Pace yourself.

  • @nnn70
    @nnn70 11 месяцев назад +19

    The moment I changed my job my anxiety went away

    • @iaintgonlie7858
      @iaintgonlie7858 3 месяца назад +6

      some jobs are just not meant for certain personality types. The job is easy but other factors make it unbearable. I hate the need to socialize at jobs. I just want to do my assignment and leave, but work culture always want you to be a ''team player''.

    • @Traysee379
      @Traysee379 3 месяца назад

      @@iaintgonlie7858That’s why I have a lot of anxiety. We have to engage with residents when before they just wanted their meds and go but now it’s a bit too much the culture of it all is sickening. Back biting even residents. Just sad.

  • @Sparkymag
    @Sparkymag 3 года назад +90

    Never thought of it this way. Just left a job because of this...🤦‍♀️ Now I'm starting over again, increasing my stress - maybe for nothing. Oh boy... I need to move into resilience, compassion, instead of fear, panic, etc.

    • @khakikohii
      @khakikohii 3 года назад +5

      hello, how are you now?

    • @allyson--
      @allyson-- 2 года назад

      how are *you* now?

    • @Sparkymag
      @Sparkymag 2 года назад +13

      Doing much better. Still a bit anxious at work meetings and more complicated tasks but this position, despite more work, is a much better fit for me. 👍

    • @skyerobinson7988
      @skyerobinson7988 Год назад +2

      @@Sparkymag really proud of you! you give me motivation for my new job

    • @rosetigga2077
      @rosetigga2077 Год назад

      Amazing video ! Keep up the great work and content … never looked at this way

  • @lakenmarie8142
    @lakenmarie8142 Год назад +43

    I feel so seen. I left a job partly because I felt attacked and disrespected by a coworker. I could not understand why he would treat me that way and it really festered. I felt rejected. Im feeling that way in my new job now, so it must be me. I understand coworkers don't need to be best friends but could at least be friendly in passing. Everyone is in survival mode and I can't expect everyone to mask. Thank you for helping me understand this

    • @datnohi8612
      @datnohi8612 11 месяцев назад +1

      No weapons formed against thee shall prosper. ISAIAH 54:17. just know you are not the problem they are

    • @fineweather4569
      @fineweather4569 11 месяцев назад +7

      Modern working world is awful - people are just robots, and technology is making work worse as you have to complete tasks faster and faster. Trick is to train for something else that you might enjoy better and gives you more autonomy and control. Working for yourself rather than in an office is far better. Look at options and retrain.

    • @MedranoHijo
      @MedranoHijo 11 месяцев назад +2

      ​@@fineweather4569
      Thank you for actually elaborating and not slamming a Bible verse in my face.

  • @lisac6139
    @lisac6139 2 года назад +158

    I literally managed to relax and let go of my anxiety in my new job today. I also made a mistake but corrected it, without too much stress. So proud of myself. Thank you so much for your insights.

  • @himadevaraj7760
    @himadevaraj7760 Год назад +7

    i am so happy I'm not alone in feeling this. Reading this comments really makes me feel understood

  • @scottedwards807
    @scottedwards807 2 года назад +64

    I don't know if you will see this comment being that you made this video a couple of years ago...but I have slow processing skills. When I was in grade school, they would say that I'm a slow learner. At work, the faster people will get aggravated because I'm not picking up as fast as I should or if I make a mistake that most people with fast processing skills wouldn't make. This has done a number on my self esteem feeling quite stupid at times. Thank you for the video.

    • @wselenag45
      @wselenag45 2 года назад +12

      It takes time to catch on to things in a new environment, that's my take on it, just continue to do your job until you get better with it.

    • @mariyanedelcheva2967
      @mariyanedelcheva2967 Год назад +4

      Same here

    • @mstwelvedeadlycyns
      @mstwelvedeadlycyns Год назад +7

      We all make mistakes. They ones who appear faster refuse to allow anyone to see it.

    • @cassidymitchell9412
      @cassidymitchell9412 8 месяцев назад +2

      I literally feel like this too. I’m at a new job , started 3 weeks ago I’m 25
      .. and I process things so slow. It’s the worst :(

    • @scottedwards807
      @scottedwards807 8 месяцев назад

      @@cassidymitchell9412 Yes it’s the worst because there isn’t anything I can do about it

  • @TheFluquency
    @TheFluquency 2 года назад +49

    I’ve had 10 jobs in 4 years from me getting them, then becoming anxious and doubting myself and quitting within 1-6 months. I’m tired of feeling this way, I need money, and it seems like I only quit when I finally get comfortable with the tasks because I get anxiety about “what if I’m never as quick/efficient as my coworkers?” or “what if I forget things even after I’ve worked here for months?” I don’t know what to do…..😔

    • @Fleon47
      @Fleon47 2 года назад +5

      feeling the same way. Feel ya. Getting a new job made me even more insecure. Feel like it pushes it. the uncertainty is what makes this feeling.

    • @karissakline6765
      @karissakline6765 2 года назад +12

      I’ve been doing what I do on and off for 15+ years and I still get those fears. I also struggle with wanting to quit often because I have PTSD from being fired many years back and I feel a need to ‘protect’ my ego from that and pull the plug if I feel they are not happy with me. It is a viscous cycle and I hope you are able to overcome it, myself included.

    • @thesaexplorer
      @thesaexplorer 2 года назад +6

      You are not alone. I always get thoughts of "what will they think of me if I'm not catching on to this job as quick as they or anyone else would" and fear making mistakes or not being as busy or doing enough as others.

    • @mariyanedelcheva2967
      @mariyanedelcheva2967 Год назад +3

      I am on the same boat. Recently started new job and I never felt so anxious as I am feeling now. I cannot sleep, I have no time to eat and I am constantly doubting myself. On top of that my boss is a bully and scream most of the time to people. 💆🏻‍♀️

    • @damonherring136
      @damonherring136 Год назад

      Sounds like you may have a anxiety disorder very much like me it makes you doubt yourself. I was diagnosed genralized anxiety disorder 1 year ago I recommend therapy before it starts to destroy your whole entire life from job to relationships and everything you have.

  • @Abhishekyadav-kb3wq
    @Abhishekyadav-kb3wq 3 года назад +178

    Thank you so much. This video exactly shows why I am so tensed. I am a person who always gets tensed whenever I get a new task at job. I am currently working from home. I take tension about unnecessary things. I have been doing this since college. In college I thought everything would be ok once I get a job. But now I see that college stress was nothing compared to the one I am getting at job now. I always keep on thinking about how am I going to meet the deadline of the next task instead of focusing on the current task. I keep checking the same task again and again but I am never satisfied and think that there is some flaw in it. There is this guy in my office. We both studied in the same college and are working in the same firm now. But he handles things without much problem no matter how much work he gets. I don't know how people do it. Me on the other hand doesn't feel motivated to do the work and just keep waiting for weekends so that I can relax and sometimes end up doing work on weekends too just cause I wasn't working properly on weekdays. But I will try working on these problems and will write down the things that are keeping me from performing properly. Thanks again for making such videos❤️

  • @shakoe1943
    @shakoe1943 4 года назад +92

    This feels like a therapy sesssion! Thank you so much. I started crying when you named all the points like “too hectic” “my boss has too high expectations”....

    • @erinMfoley
      @erinMfoley  4 года назад +16

      Lucy! I am so glad you tuned in. You are NOT alone in feeling this way! Start to understand this is your mind creating drama because it's panicked. The more you practice reflecting on things and getting perspective the better you will get at it.

  • @Fleon47
    @Fleon47 2 года назад +18

    we live in a world even if you have a good job you may constantly feel insecure to lose that job if you are not good enough. I am constantly worrying about my tasks in my job. What if I will make mistakes the most terrifying thing is then you have a problem and seem not to have a solution for that. People say I need to relax on that, nobody will judge me for things I could not do but I always judge myself for being not productive enough.
    This way is of thinking is always part of my life. This type of thinking is very hard to change and there are so many people like me, who seek their entire life a solution for that and try to solve it, by watching and understanding content like yours.

    • @robtektek
      @robtektek Год назад +1

      the answer is self love self compassion and self acceptance. its something i had to learn and is awkward at first, but you can slowly change your relationship with yourself. just think of your innerchild and how it feels right now (spoiler: its terrified of you). what would you tell that child so that it can feel better? my journey to more self acceptance and self love has been a true game changer. im way less harsh on my self and i can forgive myself for mistakes. and it doesnt mean that i stopped trying to do my best every day. it just means that it's ok if i dont perform well constantly.

    • @Fleon47
      @Fleon47 Год назад

      @@robtektek thx you for sharing these words, it's still hard but the are also days where I feel good then I can help someone with their issues at work. I'm still very harsh on thinking. I'm actually don't know how take what I think not to critical and self reflect in a good way. Maybe because how I felt in my last job. Self acceptance is a key you said, might need to work on that.

    • @brianna3239
      @brianna3239 9 месяцев назад

      Yes I work in finances and handle car repossessions so i’m not allowed to make any mistakes. Well these last few weeks I have made Several due to so many policy changes that I can’t seem to keep up with. I am scared everyday

  • @spyane86
    @spyane86 2 года назад +37

    Heart racing right after boss says let’s talk. Working on a task under a deadline assuming the world’s gonna crash if I fail to complete it on time, I made a typo what will the client think !
    This is on point. Thank you Erin.

  • @savvyguy1353
    @savvyguy1353 Год назад +11

    Office politics is real and there are actually people that can be out to get you or blunt your career growth. Vigilance and planning is super important to work through this stuff. Many talented people are made to feel anxious at work so that they never leave

  • @mozhy5013
    @mozhy5013 Год назад +9

    I am literally mind blowed that how much is accurate for me. I think I am not smart enough at the work that I am doing, while I actually observe how smart I am in other places and different circumstances. I experience such a fight or flight situation at work that even when someone starts to speak a bit louder than usual in our open office, I jump suddenly and my heart rate goes to the top then I get a headache.

  • @aymenjr45
    @aymenjr45 Месяц назад +2

    I am carrying the whole department on my back and still feel danger and fantasies about being terminated

  • @theonetakeshowbykaustubhsr3526
    @theonetakeshowbykaustubhsr3526 2 года назад +19

    I am tearing up as I go through this video. Surprisingly, I feel self-assured and hopeful of being able to solve the issues that make me this anxious. Incredible video.

  • @Angela-ne9cy
    @Angela-ne9cy Год назад +11

    Wow, this helped me SO MUCH!!! After 18 years in my job, I'm still having anxiety when anything goes wrong. I absorb my boss's emotions when he's unhappy with something (whether it's my fault or not) and I live in a state of panic. I've known it's disproportionate to the actual situation....but this is the FIRST TIME I've never had it clearly explained why. THANK YOU!! This makes so much sense. I literally felt myself ease the longer i listed to this.

  • @iam._.lou7877
    @iam._.lou7877 2 года назад +9

    I honestly dread going to work all the time because my anxiety sky rockets. this video really resonated with me

    • @MattDaniel-jz3tl
      @MattDaniel-jz3tl 9 месяцев назад

      Like me :( Are you better now or same?

    • @iam._.lou7877
      @iam._.lou7877 9 месяцев назад

      @MattDaniel-jz3tl it gets better. You will still have a bit of anxiety but once you keep doing shifts I found it got better

  • @startrackertrax6493
    @startrackertrax6493 Год назад +2

    I agree, this makes a lot of sense. Makes me realise im not the only one suffocating in the modern worlds idea of "freedom"

  • @nathananderson8720
    @nathananderson8720 Год назад +5

    This is one of the channels that gave me the courage to start my RUclips channel 6 months ago about self development. Now I have 347 subs and > 100 hours of watch time. I know it’s not comparable with others but I’m still proud I started because I’ve been learning so many lessons that I couldn’t have learned without getting started in the 1st place.

  • @thatomalebo5338
    @thatomalebo5338 5 месяцев назад +2

    I’ve been set free, thank you. 🌺

  • @J3Diva
    @J3Diva Год назад +5

    Definitely need to learn how to master my primitive brain. I’m on a new job after leaving a previous job of 13 years. My anxiety has been so so high and I feel like I’m in survival mode all the time. This is helpful and I will use this in my daily thinking. 😊 Thank you!

  • @Blessed77792
    @Blessed77792 10 месяцев назад +2

    Oh my goodness, where were you 6 months ago when I felt EXACTLY like you described!! I feel so relieved to find someone that gets me, and how I can process it better

  • @hellojan3600
    @hellojan3600 2 года назад +7

    I am listening to this and I am feeling like you are reading my mind. Everything that you said is how I feel everyday about work.

  • @realliving7340
    @realliving7340 8 месяцев назад +3

    This is great stuff! Will watch daily until I get my primitive mind in check.❤

  • @carpediem4413
    @carpediem4413 Год назад +11

    Wow, this really hits home as I have been searching for months trying to figure out why I am so panicked and anxious at work. It’s gotten so bad that I am on meds to cope. Yes, my boss rules out of fear and the company is struggling so I think that’s part of it. Very high expectations -but- always have a fear/challenge with authority.

    • @robtektek
      @robtektek Год назад +2

      you might want to consider to leave that place if you boss is actually an asshole and the company is toxic. it might not be just your primitive brain but external circumstances. This is very individual and this video cant give you the answer if you need to leave.

  • @strictlycommentary
    @strictlycommentary 2 года назад +29

    Watching this video is the first time in my life that I actually felt the weight lift and the anxiety start to melt away. You will never know how much you helped me. I want to thank you with my WHOLE heart for publishing this. I'm going to watch it over and over!

  • @artivarma7057
    @artivarma7057 3 года назад +47

    I really needed this. It got so overwhelming that I thought there’s something wrong with me and I’ll never be able to cope up with it. Thank you. I hope this video finds it’s way to others who might be feeling the same.

    • @shad8623
      @shad8623 2 года назад +3

      I was sitting here telling myself that I have ADD, smh

  • @madhuravi6953
    @madhuravi6953 Год назад +1

    OMG this is me. I am so glad RUclips suggested this video to me.

  • @lainsimple5285
    @lainsimple5285 11 месяцев назад +7

    Wow this is so helpful!! I’m in a new role and really struggling with it. You laid out exactly what is going on in my brain. When I have a bad workday or a lot of anxiety I start panic applying to other jobs because I’m desperate for a change, but that of course creates more anxiety. I’m going to try your suggestions and see if that helps!

    • @Meeeee_1
      @Meeeee_1 11 месяцев назад

      Hey, I just saw your comment and that it's pretty brand new compared to other people's. I was just wondering if we could maybe exchange numbers and speak about this only because I do struggle with anxiety and I don't have many friends lol if you wanted to make a new friend and vent x

  • @homebody61
    @homebody61 4 года назад +37

    Thank you for your videos! Yesterday was the first day at a new job for me. After work I had a major meltdown. Your videos literally saved me!

    • @nickjackson2910
      @nickjackson2910 3 года назад +2

      I start my first day in 1 hour

    • @homebody61
      @homebody61 3 года назад +1

      Nick jackson I hope all went well!

    • @Farhiya-b8f
      @Farhiya-b8f 11 месяцев назад

      I'm 1 week old at my new job were everything is new, even how the job is done to new to me. I haven't met anyone I can ask for help, this makes me feel like I'm dump and unworthy but I also know no one was born knowing everything and that it's all new to me so how I'm I supposed to know it all. Ugh I like in constant fear of if I will be able to do it.

    • @homebody61
      @homebody61 11 месяцев назад

      @@Farhiya-b8f I totally understand. Give yourself patience.

  • @auntykiki8161
    @auntykiki8161 3 года назад +12

    Oh my…my whole life at the moment. Thank you! It’s awful. I feel so stressed and overthink everything and then get called out for overthinking the work which is crucial to get right! My brain could explode! :(

  • @SiphokuhleMakhamba
    @SiphokuhleMakhamba 2 года назад +5

    This is literally how I have been feeling the whole time. Thank you for this.

  • @datnohi8612
    @datnohi8612 11 месяцев назад +4

    Unfortunately it seems like every job is toxic, im not planning to stay no more,than a few years so when the toxicity starts to bleed out im on my way out the door to the temp agency for a new and exciting toxic work place. Adventure, just need a check ✔️ im not here for bullshit 💯

    • @tornado7066
      @tornado7066 4 месяца назад

      So how to make money?

  • @JesusChrist5000
    @JesusChrist5000 2 года назад +20

    Office politics have something to do with it as well. When you unconsciously or consciously know that you are on the low rung regarding office politics, this can cause anxiety, especially if there is someone on the higher rung flexxing their muscles against you.

    • @savvyguy1353
      @savvyguy1353 Год назад +6

      Absolutely. The whole point when you are out of the loop is to let you know you are low value at work and to make you anxious

  • @crazykaitlyn
    @crazykaitlyn Год назад +1

    😢 I literally have been calling the advice nurse line, texting the crisis line, had a telehealth visit with a doctor, and this video was all i wanted. thank you so much and thank God for youtube

  • @neildoyle77
    @neildoyle77 3 года назад +11

    It's like you literally read the inside of my mind and my situation and explained all of it perfectly. This video could be groundbreaking for me so thankyou so much.

  • @glen458
    @glen458 2 года назад +3

    I have no words!!!!! This is completely amazing and is 100% me. Thank you 😢

  • @nicoleraphael2010
    @nicoleraphael2010 Год назад +1

    The concept of beings aware of my primitive brain is so powerful. Thanks for giving me a new tool to help me manage my anxiety

  • @BruklynGam3r
    @BruklynGam3r 6 месяцев назад +1

    You hit what I’m going threw day to day, this is so true.

  • @ProfreshionalLifeBeyond
    @ProfreshionalLifeBeyond 2 года назад +7

    I've never been anxious till recently. After being made redundant a few years ago, I found myself struggling with starting new work. Your video explains my misery. I know I can do my job but somehow I am always on the overdrive. Thank you for your instructions. Best wishes from Melbourne Australia.

  • @jacquelinegary4235
    @jacquelinegary4235 Год назад +1

    I have PTSD from being Bullied so much in school. I feel as through my brain goes into protective mode anytime I feel anxious and overwelmed. I do well as an introvert but always feeling all kinds of things outside in the world. You are on point helping me address an issue once it's acknowledged I approach and deal with it. It has taking me a lifetime to learn myself. You are a wonder light worker and thanks for helping me on this day to get unstuck in my personal growth.

  • @xdemgeo3581
    @xdemgeo3581 Год назад +1

    When you gave examples, everything was me.

  • @lonimimeseko
    @lonimimeseko Год назад +7

    I really needed to see this. I recently started a new job and my anxiety has been through the roof because of my internal fears of not bein good enough. So this video couldn't have come up at a better time. I really appreciate the advice and very helpful suggestions to focus on developing self compassion rather than constantly criticizing ourselves for making mistakes at work. Thank you

    • @Cyanneid
      @Cyanneid Год назад

      How are you feeling now? I’m in the same boat!

    • @edmardavid
      @edmardavid Год назад

      How are you now? Im having anxiety in my new work im already in my 3rd month now and i have so many mistakes in my work 😢

    • @4minutebeautyy
      @4minutebeautyy Год назад

      @@edmardavidyou will get there! Believe in you! Often times we think our mistakes are much bigger than they are, half the time management doesn’t notice or if they do they’ve seen so much worse so it’s not that big of a deal.

  • @johngabriana7154
    @johngabriana7154 2 года назад +4

    Omg thank you I was just promoted recently and the job is very different and I'm having a hard time to cope up that it's giving me anxiety. This helped me to realize those emotions

  • @5thgentexantexasforever982
    @5thgentexantexasforever982 Год назад +30

    I go home in tears from work sometimes. I just started a new job about 2 months ago at 52 yrs old. I know the on the job training isn't the best and I've been trying to learn as much as I can about my job on the side. I'm usually a confident person but the 2 things I have fear of is 1, failing and 2, the office manager tasked to train me. She is easily agitated and is contradictory at times. She has told me the company has a "do it right the first time policy and if I need help, ask". But there are times when I do, she gets agitated..openly. Another issue is when ahead makes a mistake, it's perfectly OK but if I do, it's a huge issue. I've even caught her making a mistake and then she blames me. The other new girl that just started has said she's scarey. Now I have a fear of making any mistake or asking her more than one question. It's as if, because she told me once in one scenario, I should know exactly what to do in a completely different scenario. I don't know what to do. Quit and find another job in this field or stick it out hoping to get better.

    • @jacquelineclarke264
      @jacquelineclarke264 Год назад +6

      I'm 57 in a new job 3 weeks. Anxiety through the roof. Stick it out. Don't let a strangers personality put u out of your job. Best of luck to us both and all other new oldies.😊

    • @Bluefroggy84
      @Bluefroggy84 Год назад +3

      How's your job going now?

    • @5thgentexantexasforever982
      @5thgentexantexasforever982 Год назад +5

      @Bluefroggy84 actually, it's way better now. The office manager ended up apologizing one morning for "being such a bitch". I knew she had a lot on her shoulders, being there by herself and doing everything while also trying to train me. When she lightened up with the critical remarks, my brain switched from fear to a more relaxed state and I started learning more. They hired another girl that just got her license and now, the other girl and I have split the alphabet and focus on service while the office manager can focus on life & health. She (the office manager) took a week vacation and we only had to call her once. Now that we've gotten, for the most part, p & c, I'm going to start studying for my life & health. Thank you for your concern. I really appreciate it.

    • @americasariesson1862
      @americasariesson1862 Год назад

      @@5thgentexantexasforever982GOOD!

  • @denissemedina4619
    @denissemedina4619 10 месяцев назад +2

    I have been going to therapy and I talk about this with my therapist. At work I feel like I’m not good enough even when I rarely make mistakes. I just don’t allow myself to make mistakes and it does not help that my boss is very neat picky and strict at times. I have a hard time accepting constructive criticism at times, it all depends how it’s said. Now that I think about it I have always had trouble dealing with authority, like dealing with managers or high ups always makes me feel nervous like I really value their input whether it is good or bad and I let define me. This makes me go into overthinking and I end up with headaches and starts doubting myself a lot. I do give myself a break and then look at my thoughts from the outside like you said and they don’t seem as accurate, but at the moment my brain truly convinces me that I’m a total failure :( also when I do something good I feel good about myself for the rest of the day, but if I do something wrong it messes it all up or even if I had a good day, I can have anxiety the next day because what if I make a mistake today :(

    • @Sunny-wq9ue
      @Sunny-wq9ue 5 месяцев назад

      this is exactly me as well. How do you cope with it? @denissemedina4619

  • @victorianunezbaron1424
    @victorianunezbaron1424 5 месяцев назад +1

    Thank you for the video, it feels good not being the only one with this amount of dark thinking at work

  • @SteveGia80
    @SteveGia80 2 года назад +1

    I’ve played this 3x already. I just started a new job and I needed to hear this.

  • @SamLowe4271
    @SamLowe4271 2 года назад +3

    You may not read this being an old video, but thank you for this. This explained so much. Been struggling with anxiety since I was a child over various things. Now I see that they could all have been traced back to my primitive needs and primitive mind.

  • @highpriestess3380
    @highpriestess3380 Год назад +4

    This was so helpful, and resonated with me so much. I suffer from this on a daily basis, and I always self doubt, feel inadequate and fearful. It feels incredibly liberating to know so many others feel this way.
    You have really helped me identify something that's been a major struggle for me for as long as I can remember. I've never heard about this, not even from a counselor. Thank you.

  • @angelaanthony7980
    @angelaanthony7980 3 года назад +3

    Oh wow I just changed jobs and feel this u tube has been done for me I thought I was so alone .

  • @CUSELİSFAN
    @CUSELİSFAN Год назад +2

    "panic producing". So what's what i was experiencing. 🤔🤭
    You know, I've seen a few videos on stress before, and I had to check if the people who made these videos were experts. With you, I'm just hooked. What you are talking about makes immediate sense. I really dont care what your credentials are. 👍👍

  • @Mrbradbrenn
    @Mrbradbrenn 3 месяца назад

    This is spot on what I am experiencing, it’s terrible and very difficult to fix!

  • @darioperes8923
    @darioperes8923 10 месяцев назад

    I feel this. Exactly this. I think my job is making me exclude myself from other things. More important things like connections.

  • @leonardoscodeler5875
    @leonardoscodeler5875 2 года назад +2

    This is the best and most assertive explanation I have found about my problem with my career which I am struggling with for 12 years.

  • @gohtashiraishi9157
    @gohtashiraishi9157 3 года назад +8

    What a fascinating video, thank you! It goes to show that our society is changing much faster than our biology, and we’re physiologically not able to keep up!

  • @jilsnajyothi6869
    @jilsnajyothi6869 2 года назад +9

    Heyy folks out there,
    I just want to reinstate that you are not alone! Cliche! I am always anxious about everything and being 6'2 feet does not pretty much help to get along! I am anxious about things usual people do hands-tied. I wish I could live that way. Right now, new workplace! No one to talk to. Career path change! New city! Too much to be anxious about 😐

  • @KuriQT
    @KuriQT 2 месяца назад

    Finally someone who knows what I'm going through.

  • @houdine123
    @houdine123 4 года назад +7

    I'm actually in the same situation ,I feel worthless and demotivated cheers from Morocco 🇲🇦

    • @erinMfoley
      @erinMfoley  4 года назад +3

      I am so sorry you are feeling this way. I hope this video helped you to shift your mindset. The belief that you are worthless is a very demotivating belief. Consider the possibility that you are deeply valuable in this job. Each day look for evidence/examples of how this is true. As your mind starts to see that you are valuable, you will likely start to feel more motivated.

  • @faherty87
    @faherty87 3 года назад +2

    just started a new job. I'm flop sweat central. these videos are a godsend.

  • @mrm.s.4500
    @mrm.s.4500 2 года назад +3

    Erin this is the best video I’ve watched in a really long time. I just found your channel and couldn’t figure out how you don’t have 200k subscribers!

  • @mz3735
    @mz3735 4 месяца назад +4

    From personal experience, I think the reason why so many feel anxiety about working is because they don't fit that job type very well, and don't have any real passion for it, so they know it will be dependent on 100 % will-power to get through it.
    I had extreme anxiety/panic for my job at the restaurant, due to being expected to work amidst constant acute stress and multitasking like a pro. This was not just outside my comfort zone, but outside my ability in general. I suck at multitasking, and to also do it while under non-stop extreme stress made me freeze up. Furthermore, there was no breaks or snack breaks to be had, and the expectations of workinh oneself to death was there. I also had to be left alone in the kitchen AS A BEGINNER. Inside my body i was needing to either be rescued or somehow miraculously be make ready for this. That is a telltale sign that this is not within my natural abilities, competence, or my body's tolerance. I quit, 4 days in.
    The next job I got was an internship that promised employment after training, and it required me to take orders in a language I did not speak well, on top of the heavy kitchen work. They were also super strict about how you couldn't sit down and rest, except for a 30 min lunch. I couldn't continue longer than 8 days in.
    The next job was an unpaid internship at a giant supermarket, and it fit me great. No anxiety was associated with it. Work was minutes away by bike. I learnt the worktasks immediately after being taught them the first time. I did everything well, and beyond, and my boss was satisfied with my work. The fact that it was STRESS-FREE, independent, and i could work at my own pace, according to a to-do list, was a relief. But something was missing. It was impersonal. Vustomer interactions, colleagues, very distant and impersonal. Customers only wanted to know where something was and how much it cost, but I wanted more. I wanted to go above and beyond to make their day. This, is what compelled me to find an internship in a smaller botique, of high quality customer service, with regular customers, who genuinely needed help to feel a certain way. So I applied, and I got it. I am starting tomorrow. I feel nervous, a slight resistance to it, but more so because it is new territory of uncertainties, and because I want to become good at the tasks and customer service.
    So this is it, I think. Explore different job types, and see how your anxiety changes. I think the anxiety is a powerful indicator of whether something will work for you or not.

    • @00BeesKnees00
      @00BeesKnees00 4 месяца назад

      That's a good point. We shouldn't try to shoehorn ourselves into positions that we aren't naturally good at. How do you get your internships? I'll soon be starting my first office assistant internship. I'm a nervous wreck. I hope the boutique will be everything you had hoped for. You sound so dedicated, you deserve it.

    • @mz3735
      @mz3735 4 месяца назад

      @@00BeesKnees00 I live in Denmark, and get my internships hrough the agency we call Jobcenter. Basically you register there as unemployed, to get welfare, while you actively make yourself work-ready, and the jobcenter employees (social workers) hook you up with some contact they have.
      The job I am starting tomorrow is actually something that study councellors at a business chool found for me. This in relation to me looking for a place to get a vocational education. So my internship tomorrow is in the hopes of landing a vocational education there. My past experiences have made it obvious to me that I enjoy working in retail, especially where I get close contact with the customers. So I am aiming for a vocational education within this. Where I live in Denmark, there are plrnty of job opportunities within retail.

  • @rupowell2821
    @rupowell2821 4 месяца назад

    I haven’t heard anything as brilliant as this in a very long time. This has really helped me after starting a new job that has seriously overwhelmed me in the past few weeks. Chronic internal primitive brain anxiety..comes in waves and then subsides, comes again and subsides, very unpleasant..but this video really covers a lot..thankyou 🙏🙏

  • @jericaleigh
    @jericaleigh 3 месяца назад

    Wow!! You have me perfectly described on my new job, I was going through that on the last company I was working for..

  • @Cleaner-World
    @Cleaner-World 5 месяцев назад

    Really great advice! Interesting how there are whole industries and organizations that take advantage of this, and tell you exactly the opposite, and that is," You're right! It IS the environment around you that is out to get you!"

  • @mkhidir93
    @mkhidir93 2 года назад +64

    I'm 3 weeks in my new job, and there's a lot to take in to a point that I get anxious and made mistakes and at the end stressing myself.
    I find that writing things out, listing out the things I need to focus on really helps. Just like she said, once you write it all down, it slowly starts to look simpler/easier. Cos for me, if it stays in my brain all the time, things get cluttered and I can't make out what I really need to do. And the other thing that helps is, sometimes when I get scared of not knowing how to do a new job, I just went ahead and start doing it. Most of the time, it's not as hard as I think it is. Just start doing it, instead of worrying and procrastinating.
    I'm currently still trying to cope with my current new job. I wish the very best for everyone in coping with each own challenges. We can do this. :)

    • @johnboy6594
      @johnboy6594 Год назад +1

      Great Advice. Write it down. So now that its on paper its out of your head. This way your brain is not trying to remember everything at once. And then eventually everything catches up and everything matches. What great advice.. The internet is an amazing tool. My kids have no idea how mind blown i am by this amazing invention.

  • @nicolesteele6000
    @nicolesteele6000 2 года назад +31

    I think this is a great concept but there are some toxic workplaces. What is the best way to be able to judge this? Just get out if the heightened state so that I can make a more rational judgment? I'm currently in a workplace where other people are also getting extremely stressed and leaving. I still blame myself as a failure for not being able to handle it

    • @rickytikitavi4101
      @rickytikitavi4101 2 года назад +3

      Same.
      I'm 2 months into my job and a part of me knows I'm in a toxic place because even very experienced workers eventually gave up and left. I hear from employees who've been with the company for 40 years that "it's never been this bad". But I also can't help but judge myself for being incompetent (which I probably am, because the company is in such a bad condition that it's only able to attract newbies or people with few other options). I want to give up because I feel I don't have what it takes for this job, but I'm afraid that if I keep giving up when facing challenges I'll never grow and never get ahead.
      I wish there was a way for me to distinguish my low self esteem from a situation where the challenge is objectively too big for me to overcome😔

    • @JimmyJaxJellyStax
      @JimmyJaxJellyStax Год назад +1

      Absolutely - had plenty of toxic coworkers that are constant trouble everyday.

  • @lama-rask
    @lama-rask 2 месяца назад

    I have spent two month obsessed over this presentation and dreaming of the moment I will get it done with and how I will just lie down besides my desk feeling joy and even though it went fine I didn't
    I absolutely didn't have this much wanted experience I just felt a mild relief and start thinking about what I could have done wrong with out noticing and how I could have done it better
    I can't say this doesn't actually lead me to better work but it absorbs all the joy from the experience and I am doing what I love I am in my dream work

  • @NatureGoodness-j4p
    @NatureGoodness-j4p 9 месяцев назад +1

    Thanks for sharing and helping me with this kind of fear I'm having ❤❤

  • @TimotheeLee
    @TimotheeLee 11 месяцев назад +1

    I suffer from anxiety and am seeing a psychiatrist for it. She says it's from the physical makeup of my body. She prescribed a blood pressure medication that helps reduces it. I understand that this treatment is tailored for me(everybody's different) but it definitely makes a difference.

  • @aveywilliams7761
    @aveywilliams7761 Год назад +1

    I'm so glad that I stumbled upon your your video. My anxiety has grown tremendously since I started my new position. And even my toned has changed. I'm usually an upbeat cheerful person but this position has made me become very hard and callus.
    I'm working on not being so anxious all the time and reacting defensively out of fear. You taught me that .... Everything doesn't deserve a negative reaction and not everything deserves a reaction. Thank you, I do feel better. You've put my mind at ease.

  • @MommyAatSG
    @MommyAatSG Год назад +1

    I was diagnosed with sleep apnoea which explains why I kept forgetting even simple and important things at work. I've been scolded for the quality of my work, which has never happened in my 30 years of professional life. These and other issues in life happening at the same time made me so anxious to go back to work and I'm all the time easily overwhelmed and sometimes panicking. I've lost confidence in my own quality of work while I used to be very confident and able. I dont know how I can push myself to go back to work. I need my work, as I'm a sole breadwinner.

  • @natashakalanda622
    @natashakalanda622 8 месяцев назад

    Thanks for this. I am in fight or flight 99% of the time. I now have resorted to the bad behavior of running away. I don't experience joy when I succeed, but I experience relief. I am not capable, but my position is such a privilege, why cant I be normal?

  • @asgw12
    @asgw12 2 года назад +4

    I've listened to this so many times now, it's very helpful. When I'm a bit more stable I will definitely contact you for coaching. You're brilliant!

  • @floriansaurusrex
    @floriansaurusrex Год назад

    Wow this is super spot on... 4 weeks into new job and still in this anxious space. Thank you this.

  • @carolineb7796
    @carolineb7796 Год назад +2

    This video is amazing, thank you so much for sharing this. It was like you had directly into my own brain and spilled out the contents in a video. Such great insights, and advice - thank you ❤ Anxiety has plagued me for years, and I am so sick of it. Hopefully with this advice (on my way to buy a journal right now) and some regular professional help I can kick it for once and for all. X

  • @BreeziDeezi
    @BreeziDeezi 2 года назад +6

    I know you said people may agree with 1 or 2 of the many traits of primitive you mentioned, but I aligned with 6. It was very insightful. 2 months into a role and I am so anxious and I feel that my boss hates me. If I cant change her perspective that is fine, this clarity will help me get through my time here. Thank you.

  • @ThePoser010
    @ThePoser010 3 месяца назад

    Listening to this just reduced my stress a shit ton. Thanks 🙏

  • @belindajane2173
    @belindajane2173 2 года назад +2

    You are incredibly informative and so knowledgeable. Thank you so much for sharing this to us viewers, it is greatly appreciated. From a viewer in Australia 🇦🇺

  • @JKimmi_
    @JKimmi_ 10 месяцев назад

    Very relatable! This is helpful to shift my perspective!! I constantly feel I like I need psychological help or there is a lack in me, that my brain is running on burnout. But this new paradigm has opened my eyes. Will do all the steps and hopefully, make the coming work days less fearful for me.