Thank you but...i love this guy since 20 years ago. We lost contact for 13. He searched for me and found me in April and asked to be friends again. I agreed. I thought just friends. But he started reminding me how he loves me. And we started dating but after June, day after we became intimate (after all those years)... he's distant till now. No more daily calls nor texts. I have blocked him but he found me physically and told me not to block. But now... he's still distant even when i tried initiating conversation, which is rare for me. I want to say goodbye to him but i know that i will love him even for another 20 years. Pls pray for a resolution 😢
@@triggeryy update...i have blocked him completely...doing well so far and the focusing on myself and feeling better :) thank you so much to you and everyone who cares
@@brandenlucerovlogs I’d say men more so. It’s all about ego. Thanks to Elliot I can easily pick up on the coming back around phase. You know it’s an ego game. When you show them no attention they’ll literally do anything for it. Love bomb, put themselves out there more, like more of your stuff on social media to get noticed. Women are more emotional based than ego.
Guys feel threatened when they know you have options and those who know ur worth would not play with egos and risk another guy standing in line to take u
Girl, if I were the only option you have then I wouldn't want you in the first place. Men aren't threatened by your list of options, they're threatened by the possibility that you might be unloyal and play games behind their backs.
I can’t even talk to more than one guy… never mind having “options”. Most options are a waste of timeeeeee. It’s stupid & all these videos are all about games
There’s a thing called casual sex. Nothing wrong with having fun casual sex as long as u know it’s casual. Sex is an amazing thing and it’s often frowned upon when woman want it for fun. Or to feel good. It’s really sad tbh.
Love this. I spent 6 years of pulling away cos he was so non committal but he knew I'd go back. The longest I held out was 3 months but I see now how I was trying to get a reaction..that being to commit. Of course it never was going to happen. It's been 6 months now and guess what? He's started texting. But for the first time I'm really done. I'm too old for his games. People..listen to this guy. Wish I had 6 years ago.
Insecure people attract insecure partners. People who are content with themselves will neither play such games nor will they watch such videos. Just read the comments and you'll see women trying to "solve" men like they're some kind of puzzle. They're insecure and therefore are attracted to trash.
He wanted to break up with me so many times. Finally, I gave in and left. I didn’t talk to him for a month by ignoring all of his calls and texts. He told me he missed me and that I should hit him up when I have time. I’m so proud of myself for not giving in. The only reason I kind of want to contact him is to see our dog 🐕.
I am single and have my power back. Access to me is by MY choice only from now on! 2020 was one heck of a year so far but oh so good because inner work and lots of healing and chasing after the ONLY MAN for me (Jesus Christ) has helped me realize I am worth the wait and single is not a curse but a blessing! 2021 will be so good!! 💃🏾💃🏾💃🏾 Exes who pulled away from me showed me that aren’t capable and available for me. All good! No more chasing them. I’m chasing me now! Thanks for the video-timely and timeless!
Because as these life coaches teach us, nature of the male. We are designed different, more women (in US) so they have learned how to plan with female emotions. We need each other, DON'T PLAN THE GAME, get off the chessboard & KNOW your value!!
@@michellewall6748 aww that's sweet, I'm still succeeding, it's still heartbreaking even more so as time goes on but I will be fine without him. In fact I think God was saving me from him which is why I couldn't 100% just beg for him
I was talking to a guy for many months and he started acting distant and then fell off the map . Granted he is a busy doctor but still he had plenty of time for me in the beginning. Anyway, I didn't chase him at ALL. I let him do his disappearing act...yes I cried and was very upset but I did not let him see or know this at all (my poor friend had to listen to it instead). About 40 days later he popped back up like nothing was wrong. I joking called him Houdini and then proceeded to change the subject and talk to him like nothing was wrong. Since then he has been contacting me constantly...now I respond only when I feel like it... he's been demoted and he knows it. It's all about self control...if you really want the guy don't let him know it bothered you but make him understand that if he pulls away he will have to work twice as hard to get back into your life and NEVER forget what he did. A little side note-- when I said I did not chase him at all I mean I did not contact him in anyway for over 30 days..I waited for him to come back to me.
@@murel8319 Your words will be useless. Next time he pulls away you have no choice but to ghost him...which mean DO NOT REPLY to ANY of his texts or calls for 40-60 days minimum. Then just text him out of the blue "hey!! How are you?" Like nothing is wrong. You have to show him life sucks without you. Do not tell him your feelings or you will loose him. If you don't have the self cony to go no contact just sit back and enjoy being a cab cause it will never change.
@@Jennifer-di4nl okay I see but I thought u replied to yours when he came back ? Why is your advise different now? Cause before u said keep it cool when he comes back? And u replied yours?
really? you dont think he might just get in his car and come over? Or hang around your favourite bar/cafe/coffee shop in the hopes that he sees you? Stick a note through your door? get a friend to message you?
@@airbubble. Men aren’t like that. The only time a normal guy would ever do anything as desperate as you mentioned, is if his girlfriend breaks up with him and blocks him. But Elliot’s advice isn’t really geared toward those who already have girlfriend status. This is more for those who want a guy to commit but he hasn’t. So the things you’re describing would not happen in this situation. In fact, all those things sound like something a woman would do. (I personally would never.) Why would a guy go through all those desperate measures for a girl he didn’t care enough about to make his girlfriend in the first place? Just saying.
@@heymilli Maybe its just the men you know? Plenty of men I know I have done it. It's a mistake to generalise by gender as girls can play hard to get too. Its amazing how fast they stop playing games when the other person takes themselves out of the equation. I did my growing up/early datng in the years before social media and mobile phones. Your man makes like he doesn't want to commit? "Sit down and let me see the guy behind you". They'll find a way. Its on you to decide if you want them back. My point is, dont assume just because all this mobile/online stuff is available now, that its the ONLY way they will try to contact you.
Very timely! Guy keeps coming back then leaving. Told him what I was looking for previously and wouldn’t accept anything less. Hadn’t heard from him in a few months now have gotten 5 text in 24 hours. Don’t plan on responding. Done with his BS. Thanks for the great reminder to not cave. I know it will be the same as before.
I could smell a player a mile away , as soon as I saw him trying to talk to me and give me those lingering eyes I knew exactly what he was! Now I just stay clear from him ! I don’t fall for those games !!! don’t let yourself be accessible , stay out of his reach and out of his eye sight , he will leave you alone !
Elliot! I love your term "outcome dependent"!! It is so close to being "externally referent-ed" as a definition heard in my codependence recovery. I immediately start looking back at my actions and words to see if they were outcome depended in my last infatuation that turned incredibly painful for me. These words will stick in my mind!!! Thank you!!
I like hearing your disneyland analogy again. I actually was thinking about it today, but not in regards to relationships, but fast food. I get my fast food fix, im satisfied and dont want it for a while. then i crave burgers and fries after like 3 weeks lol
I've been searching for complete clarity on this very subject for a long while now..I've listened to other dating coaches until I found your videos on love advice...this particular video was so insightful and informative about my personal current situation. Thank you Elliott, I honestly felt like you were speaking to me personally and I now know how to handle this episode in my life with confidence, dignity and determination! I will take your advice to heart and practice it like a ritual.. God bless..
It’s me. I wanted to try and i did, then I collapsed. 2020 was the worst year of my life. Still battling though. How i wish that I listened to your advice prior to what had happened 😔 Hope for the best in 2021 and more years to come.
I've been trying my very best to ignore him & send him even a single text, b'coz I just feel like that I'm begging for his attention, b'coz he's been being cold on me for a couple of months & I realized that I am losing my dignity as a girl and as a human, it's difficult but I'm succeeding each day of ignoring him.
Because he has many women in his life like a player I think but I told him straight that I cannot take it with competition. I once told him that his hesitation to want meet it’s because I’m a last option and not important to him. Which of course he denied. I am a very busy woman and I told him I’m one man woman. So right now I m just Let Go and Let God … if he comes back I will be happy but if not I guess I have to move on…. It is what it is … Your message here are excellent to those women who are second guessing of her action. Our heart is not a bargain place, if he want you he will find a way to stay true to us …. I believe in this ….
I walked away from a Breadcrumber now he's trying to contact me for 2 days and I'm ignoring him. Why is he trying to contact me desperately if he never wanted to talk to me to begin with??....I hope he goes away soon...
i don’t usually give up easily.. i try my best to hold on .. .. to make things work… but once i am done with a guy.. then that it’s.. no going back.. i understand he is not the one i should think my future with.
We both know we miss each other but we both also know that we don't work. And the screaming silence from both our sides is sad and makes me feel like I dreamed him up and he never existed after years of being together.
You are amazing! I finally get it. I was not sure I trusted you but your direct approach is what I need. I’m a “don’t sugarcoat it” kinda gal. Thank you. I’m done w him!
So I pull away, he comes back then what? does this person deserves a second chance or once I pull away there is no turning back under any circumstance?
He didn't want to move forward or commit. So I said goodbye. It was a very intense connection. So is there a possibility he will try and reconnect? I'm okay with it if he doesn't. I'm slowly getting over it as hard as it was. And I ain't close to collapsing.
Guys want to 'make you mine' if they really think you're the 'one'. So being non commital means he doesn't feel that.. Yet. Unfortunately with guys I've seen that perspective change very rarely. I've seen guys fall for frumpy girls, seemingly plain girls, head over heels, in the initial interactions itself. However it's hard to come by a guy falling in love even with the most 'beautiful' woman 'later'
@@ladyowl9187 I am sooo happy for you! This is so encouraging. I’ve been so down about my situation but you’ve given me hope, thank you for your comment 🙏🏽
I left him 2014 he tried to show up in 2018 and then again in 2020. He was with her the second time, and ignored her and tried to approach me, I ignored him and carried on with my day as normal.
Oh wow. Thanks, Elliot for this video. This guy whom I have since decided to stop communicating with and blocked on Whatsapp (I just checked, yep, 3 months now, due to the whole shady, flaky dates/communication pattern from him previously) style: i.e. dropping a casual after being quiet for weeks, days. He dropped me a text on Telegram this morning; as per his usual texting style: A "hey-goodmorning" text after being silent. He wrote tht he didnt knw why I blocked him; but wishing me good luck. 🙄😑
What if I haven't invested in him yet, and he has been chasing me for the past year? He was amping up the flirting hardcore for three weeks, and this was when I actually started responding and showing interest by flirting back (just flirting with my eyes and body language, nothing else). He kept showing an intense interest, and then bam! He had his own little mental panic where things started to seem more real, and then he stopped responding positively to my flirts (he would quickly look away if I caught him looking at me, and now he's probably questioning whether I am clingy or not). At this point, I felt like the only option was to pull away, but still acknowledge his presence; but just not maintain eye contact. He started looking at me again, but I look at him to acknowledge his presence for 2 seconds and be polite, and then look away and carry on with whatever I am doing. In your opinion, am I getting off to a good start? I don't want to act catty towards him, but I don't want to give him attention either. All I can say is that this is all sure going to be an interesting endeavor to say the least! 😉😎
my ex came back after 3 months and i so stupidly let him back and him thinking he came back cus he missed me but now i learnt he was out looking of other girls and when i let him back second time, he was stringing me along lol
@@soniastarmorales8013 yea he left me again but tbh i’m so over it lol, it’s weird third time he left me i got over it fast cus this time i met new amazing people & did things with my life lol
Nooo You should only respond when the quality you are expecting it's meet. He will keep you dodging and playing with his low quality responses if you allow him to. Just back away for your own good and value, and if he doesn't get better, forget him. There are at least 10000000000 more men you can get. Life is full of choices ✨
I am doing withdrawal it’s has been 2 1/2 days. I still like him and wanting him but I am ashamed of myself when I read back my pursuing texted to him trying to get him to commit a relationship with me. He’s a never my type but that’s something bout him that I like much.
If after 6 months, and they still don’t come around does it mean they may never come around again in the future? I’ve moved on for the most part but I always have a soft spot for this guy.
You should definitely move on and never expect him to come back! However, know that men do come back, even after six months. Just do not wait him. But I do think he will come back for, at least, checking how you are doing without him
I have seen stories of people coming back after 2, 5, 7..10, 20 years!! When they finish another relationship, when they are tired of being alone etc. 😅
When you wait, you send out 'desperate vibrations' in the universe. Just don't expect anything. Get on with your life. He might come out of nowhere, but it's best not to think of it or wait for it
I’ve expressed my needs (semi long distance and he’s legitimately busy building a business) and there for the most part going unmet, do I need to let him know I’m done ? Last we spoke he agreed we need to make time to talk, Text check in with each other. But I’m feeling like pulling away anyway. I love him but he’s not making enough time for me. So again , do I need to clarify the reason I’m done or can I just disappear?
I ignored him for one day and found him apologizing to me for not being available and ignoring me ....I love him so much but I want him to move forward to me .... so I will keep ignoring him for some time ...he should realize who I am to him
We don't have a romantic relationship, he look at me as his older sister, b'coz I'm 3 years older than him & we've lost communication for almost 3 years and all of a sudden, he chatted me & making some video calls on me & when I kept declining, he didn't stop to make a video call, he's saying that he's missing talking to me.
How do you ignore him and move on with my life, for the fact that he doesn't care, never call or text you but I keep doing all these yet he will say I love and put his work and desires first b4 me I'm the type who finds it soo difficult ignoring people or not talking to them. I feels guilty whenever I does that to someone, that's my nature. Please help I want move on with my life and not think of him
My fiancé pulled away because of my son’s sever oppositional defiant disorder. He yells at my fiancé and his children… There are other problems with my son that I can’t get control of and he is going to live with his dad next month- for the male structure I can’t give. I wonder if ignoring him is what I should do in this situation. He hasn’t responded to my last text and it’s been 24hr. Was never like this before.
No such thing as oppositional defiant behaviour...Its just for big pharma to sell their "products". I'm surprised you got a fiance with children from another man in this day and age 🤣
I wish the person reading this the strength to walk away from someone who isn't consistent with you.
Thank you
So kind. But I am half insane and have wanted this jackal for literally half my life. The chemistry, the looks are too much. Pray for me, sister. ♥️
Thank you but...i love this guy since 20 years ago. We lost contact for 13. He searched for me and found me in April and asked to be friends again. I agreed. I thought just friends. But he started reminding me how he loves me. And we started dating but after June, day after we became intimate (after all those years)... he's distant till now. No more daily calls nor texts. I have blocked him but he found me physically and told me not to block. But now... he's still distant even when i tried initiating conversation, which is rare for me. I want to say goodbye to him but i know that i will love him even for another 20 years. Pls pray for a resolution 😢
@@veronicaregan476Veronica you deserve better. Please walk away 😢, you’re a queen and deserve to be treated as such ❤
@@triggeryy update...i have blocked him completely...doing well so far and the focusing on myself and feeling better :) thank you so much to you and everyone who cares
It will never be this difficult when you're with the right person.
Men can’t handle being ignored, it hurts their ego.. they only come back around to make sure they can still have access to the goods.
goes both ways.
@@brandenlucerovlogs I’d say men more so. It’s all about ego. Thanks to Elliot I can easily pick up on the coming back around phase. You know it’s an ego game. When you show them no attention they’ll literally do anything for it. Love bomb, put themselves out there more, like more of your stuff on social media to get noticed. Women are more emotional based than ego.
@@brittanyracheal2998 as i said, it goes both ways. no two people are the same.
This.
I have just run for the hills....red flags....eeeek
He has no idea how willfully stubborn I am. I would saw off my arm before texting him again.
😂
Lmaaao. I delete text threads, and the guy’s number if I have to. Even on call history
That’s how I am. To a tee. Are you a Taurus too?! Lol
@@danaglover6801 I’m a Cancerian. We have a lot of feelings 😆
@@lauramorgan27 I don’t blame you! Lol
Guys feel threatened when they know you have options and those who know ur worth would not play with egos and risk another guy standing in line to take u
Girl, if I were the only option you have then I wouldn't want you in the first place. Men aren't threatened by your list of options, they're threatened by the possibility that you might be unloyal and play games behind their backs.
@@7Volkan6 boy....ok 😁😂
@@7Volkan6 oh you mean like the way men are unloyal and play games behind our backs? 🤣🤣
@@7Volkan6 your statement is contradictif
I can’t even talk to more than one guy… never mind having “options”. Most options are a waste of timeeeeee. It’s stupid & all these videos are all about games
If he comes back, don’t take him. Stand firm in your decision to not talk to them if they have crossed boundaries more than once.
True
Been 7 months. No way in hell would i go back or let him come back. I deserve better
Don't have sex ladies!! Sex makes it soo much harder to pull away!!
You struggle to be indifferent once you sleep with them. Prolong the romance for as long as you can until you have all the answers your looking for.
Yep
Fact
There’s a thing called casual sex. Nothing wrong with having fun casual sex as long as u know it’s casual. Sex is an amazing thing and it’s often frowned upon when woman want it for fun. Or to feel good. It’s really sad tbh.
I think she meant sex will crest attachment that makes you very hard to stay cool and distance afterwards @@iwonderwhatmydognamedme4000
After 2 strikes on different stuff, Dude didn’t talk to me for 21 days, strike 3, then I get a happy thanksgiving , what he got? 🦗 crickets .......
Ahahahaha omg
I love it!!!
😂😂😂yes girl!
Love this. I spent 6 years of pulling away cos he was so non committal but he knew I'd go back. The longest I held out was 3 months but I see now how I was trying to get a reaction..that being to commit. Of course it never was going to happen. It's been 6 months now and guess what? He's started texting. But for the first time I'm really done. I'm too old for his games. People..listen to this guy. Wish I had 6 years ago.
hope you are ok and know your worth to not settle for anything less than what you deserve:)
This sounds like a whole load of psychological games. Dating isn’t supposed to be that way.
Insecure people attract insecure partners. People who are content with themselves will neither play such games nor will they watch such videos. Just read the comments and you'll see women trying to "solve" men like they're some kind of puzzle. They're insecure and therefore are attracted to trash.
He wanted to break up with me so many times. Finally, I gave in and left. I didn’t talk to him for a month by ignoring all of his calls and texts. He told me he missed me and that I should hit him up when I have time. I’m so proud of myself for not giving in. The only reason I kind of want to contact him is to see our dog 🐕.
They definitely don't like when you ignore them. It's faster then a month.
I am single and have my power back. Access to me is by MY choice only from now on! 2020 was one heck of a year so far but oh so good because inner work and lots of healing and chasing after the ONLY MAN for me (Jesus Christ) has helped me realize I am worth the wait and single is not a curse but a blessing! 2021 will be so good!! 💃🏾💃🏾💃🏾 Exes who pulled away from me showed me that aren’t capable and available for me. All good! No more chasing them. I’m chasing me now! Thanks for the video-timely and timeless!
Amen! Say it louder for the people in the back! 👏🏾 👏🏾 👏🏾
Amen!
Why can't people just be frank and honest with each other instead of playing stupid games that confuse and complicate everything
Ikr, fucking frustrating lol
Because as these life coaches teach us, nature of the male. We are designed different, more women (in US) so they have learned how to plan with female emotions. We need each other, DON'T PLAN THE GAME, get off the chessboard & KNOW your value!!
I swear
Because being honest never gets the results they want. You would tell them “no”. That’s how boys are, careless and heartless.
F that, i won't cave in.
I'm STRONGER than he expected, he never saw my strength and treated my kindness as weakness.
BO-BONG!!!!!!
How did it go?
@@MsSuzieCarmichael so far so good! I've had some very down days where I just want him, but I can't allow myself to!
He doesn’t deserve you!
@@michellewall6748 aww that's sweet, I'm still succeeding, it's still heartbreaking even more so as time goes on but I will be fine without him. In fact I think God was saving me from him which is why I couldn't 100% just beg for him
@@janedane9898 hey! How's it going?
I was talking to a guy for many months and he started acting distant and then fell off the map . Granted he is a busy doctor but still he had plenty of time for me in the beginning. Anyway, I didn't chase him at ALL. I let him do his disappearing act...yes I cried and was very upset but I did not let him see or know this at all (my poor friend had to listen to it instead). About 40 days later he popped back up like nothing was wrong. I joking called him Houdini and then proceeded to change the subject and talk to him like nothing was wrong. Since then he has been contacting me constantly...now I respond only when I feel like it... he's been demoted and he knows it. It's all about self control...if you really want the guy don't let him know it bothered you but make him understand that if he pulls away he will have to work twice as hard to get back into your life and NEVER forget what he did. A little side note-- when I said I did not chase him at all I mean I did not contact him in anyway for over 30 days..I waited for him to come back to me.
Same
Girl this is the thing I needed to hear!! You’re right
@@jmjohnson2306 Yeah don't sweat it. They always come back.
@@murel8319 Your words will be useless. Next time he pulls away you have no choice but to ghost him...which mean DO NOT REPLY to ANY of his texts or calls for 40-60 days minimum. Then just text him out of the blue "hey!! How are you?" Like nothing is wrong. You have to show him life sucks without you. Do not tell him your feelings or you will loose him. If you don't have the self cony to go no contact just sit back and enjoy being a cab cause it will never change.
@@Jennifer-di4nl okay I see but I thought u replied to yours when he came back ? Why is your advise different now? Cause before u said keep it cool when he comes back? And u replied yours?
I only pulled away not for games, but because this person embarrassed me then topped it off by humiliating me. I was heartbroken.
Did he come back to you when you pulled away?
Same . 😢
If you block him he can't come back
Good point lol
Yep
really? you dont think he might just get in his car and come over? Or hang around your favourite bar/cafe/coffee shop in the hopes that he sees you? Stick a note through your door? get a friend to message you?
@@airbubble. Men aren’t like that. The only time a normal guy would ever do anything as desperate as you mentioned, is if his girlfriend breaks up with him and blocks him. But Elliot’s advice isn’t really geared toward those who already have girlfriend status. This is more for those who want a guy to commit but he hasn’t. So the things you’re describing would not happen in this situation. In fact, all those things sound like something a woman would do. (I personally would never.)
Why would a guy go through all those desperate measures for a girl he didn’t care enough about to make his girlfriend in the first place? Just saying.
@@heymilli Maybe its just the men you know? Plenty of men I know I have done it. It's a mistake to generalise by gender as girls can play hard to get too. Its amazing how fast they stop playing games when the other person takes themselves out of the equation.
I did my growing up/early datng in the years before social media and mobile phones. Your man makes like he doesn't want to commit? "Sit down and let me see the guy behind you". They'll find a way. Its on you to decide if you want them back.
My point is, dont assume just because all this mobile/online stuff is available now, that its the ONLY way they will try to contact you.
Guys looking for weakness and nothing else. And this is what many women have a hard time facing. They wanna give guys the benefit of the doubt.
We start having sympathy and romanticising the past. Never feel sorry for them, if they gave a damn they would have tried harder in the first place.
I feel like I'm listening to a close buddy by a campfire after we've had a few drinks. I like how you relay information to us. Subscribed.
Very timely! Guy keeps coming back then leaving. Told him what I was looking for previously and wouldn’t accept anything less. Hadn’t heard from him in a few months now have gotten 5 text in 24 hours. Don’t plan on responding. Done with his BS. Thanks for the great reminder to not cave. I know it will be the same as before.
In 2021 I will be lesbian.
🤣😂 i feel the same, guys are so full of drama (the one i attract) 🤦🏽♀️
😂😂😂
😂🤦🏻♀️😂
😄😄😄😄
😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣🤣to funny
Embarrassing how childish this behaviour is, if you have to use “tactics” in your relationship then it’s not the right relationship
Lol I know it's funny
Right
He came back after 12 days, we exchanged pleasantries n then i ignored him again bc he was still playin the same game
The Rubber band analogy is really good cause eventually the rubber band gets worn out and just sits there limp, stagnant and raggedy
I ignore guys that reject me and then keep staring because I do not give a damn with them anymore.
I could smell a player a mile away , as soon as I saw him trying to talk to me and give me those lingering eyes I knew exactly what he was! Now I just stay clear from him ! I don’t fall for those games !!! don’t let yourself be accessible , stay out of his reach and out of his eye sight , he will leave you alone !
... you’re not Disney Land unless he has paid the price of Disney Land tickets, to get to know you. Let him pull away; move forward without him.
He has tried to came back twice in the last month. I told him to pound sand every time. I wasn’t ignoring for games tho. It was real 😂
Pound sand? , 😂 I like that.
😂😂😂
Queen!!! 👑
I can’t even explain how much I trust what this man says. Straight to the point... the only thing we really need!
Ummm you can beat your emotions. It’s called controlling them.
I will not collapse. I never do. They always come back!
This information could've drastically saved my relationship 3 months ago..😭
Elliot! I love your term "outcome dependent"!! It is so close to being "externally referent-ed" as a definition heard in my codependence recovery. I immediately start looking back at my actions and words to see if they were outcome depended in my last infatuation that turned incredibly painful for me. These words will stick in my mind!!! Thank you!!
I like hearing your disneyland analogy again. I actually was thinking about it today, but not in regards to relationships, but fast food. I get my fast food fix, im satisfied and dont want it for a while. then i crave burgers and fries after like 3 weeks lol
I've been searching for complete clarity on this very subject for a long while now..I've listened to other dating coaches until I found your videos on love advice...this particular video was so insightful and informative about my personal current situation.
Thank you Elliott, I honestly felt like you were speaking to me personally and I now know how to handle this episode in my life with confidence, dignity and determination!
I will take your advice to heart and practice it like a ritual.. God bless..
It’s me. I wanted to try and i did, then I collapsed. 2020 was the worst year of my life. Still battling though. How i wish that I listened to your advice prior to what had happened 😔
Hope for the best in 2021 and more years to come.
New vid! 🥰🥳 I love your content! Low key teaching us how to focus on ourselves instead of chasing 😆
Read NO CHASER BY STEVE HARVEY
I've been trying my very best to ignore him & send him even a single text, b'coz I just feel like that I'm begging for his attention, b'coz he's been being cold on me for a couple of months & I realized that I am losing my dignity as a girl and as a human, it's difficult but I'm succeeding each day of ignoring him.
Because he has many women in his life like a player I think but I told him straight that I cannot take it with competition. I once told him that his hesitation to want meet it’s because I’m a last option and not important to him. Which of course he denied. I am a very busy woman and I told him I’m one man woman. So right now I m just Let Go and Let God … if he comes back I will be happy but if not I guess I have to move on…. It is what it is … Your message here are excellent to those women who are second guessing of her action. Our heart is not a bargain place, if he want you he will find a way to stay true to us …. I believe in this ….
It’s annoying because you want to be done completely but then they beg you to stay so you go back and then they mess up again
Narcissists come back at different times 🤔
I’m currently ignoring someone. 🥰 I’m over it. 👋 ✌️
Well I'm working on two weeks of walking away from someone I really cared for but know who isn't food for me. Let's see if he breaks.
I walked away from a Breadcrumber now he's trying to contact me for 2 days and I'm ignoring him. Why is he trying to contact me desperately if he never wanted to talk to me to begin with??....I hope he goes away soon...
Same, desperately trying to make Me to contact him but he never wrote. Done, I can't understand this,too..
I just pulled away after negotiation. Let’s see what happens after a month.
What happened?
amtusyaafi He reached out to me recently, but I realised I’m not into him anymore.
I love your personality and how direct and honest you are. Your videos do help a lot! Thank you very much 🥰
You’re my favorite! Such helpful, blunt ❤️ and concise content. I appreciate it all, I appreciate you!
i don’t usually give up easily.. i try my best to hold on .. .. to make things work…
but once i am done with a guy.. then that it’s.. no going back..
i understand he is not the one i should think my future with.
We both know we miss each other but we both also know that we don't work. And the screaming silence from both our sides is sad and makes me feel like I dreamed him up and he never existed after years of being together.
You are amazing! I finally get it. I was not sure I trusted you but your direct approach is what I need. I’m a “don’t sugarcoat it” kinda gal. Thank you. I’m done w him!
So I pull away, he comes back then what? does this person deserves a second chance or once I pull away there is no turning back under any circumstance?
@@jendrizzyy Thank you !
What was the advice?? Why is tar comment deleted? Please tell me also!
Answer?
I swear i kissed that like button, for reall man lol
The FIRST time you call him, you’ve LOST HIM!!
He didn't want to move forward or commit. So I said goodbye. It was a very intense connection. So is there a possibility he will try and reconnect? I'm okay with it if he doesn't. I'm slowly getting over it as hard as it was. And I ain't close to collapsing.
SAME!
Me too…. Updates ??
@@okkk934 I've moved on and have potentially met someone much better! Don't waste your time chasing.
Guys want to 'make you mine' if they really think you're the 'one'. So being non commital means he doesn't feel that.. Yet. Unfortunately with guys I've seen that perspective change very rarely. I've seen guys fall for frumpy girls, seemingly plain girls, head over heels, in the initial interactions itself. However it's hard to come by a guy falling in love even with the most 'beautiful' woman 'later'
@@ladyowl9187 I am sooo happy for you! This is so encouraging. I’ve been so down about my situation but you’ve given me hope, thank you for your comment 🙏🏽
I left him 2014 he tried to show up in 2018 and then again in 2020. He was with her the second time, and ignored her and tried to approach me, I ignored him and carried on with my day as normal.
If he really does care he will do everything in his power to find you. Regardless of how long you've ghosted him for.
Thank God I don’t care about the outcome. I’m very fortunate with this guy.
You’re my new bestie, Elliot. What should our matching tattoos be?
something to do with literature. That's my passion
😂 love it😁
@@ElliotScottDating You say literature, I go right to Harry Potter. 9 3/4. Your move, sir.
@@ElliotScottDatingSame! All the bright precious things fade so fast, and they don’t come back.
Oh wow.
Thanks, Elliot for this video.
This guy whom I have since decided to stop communicating with and blocked
on Whatsapp (I just checked, yep, 3 months now, due to the
whole shady, flaky dates/communication pattern from him previously)
style: i.e. dropping a casual after being quiet for weeks, days.
He dropped me a text on Telegram
this morning; as per his usual texting style:
A "hey-goodmorning" text after being silent.
He wrote tht he didnt knw why I blocked him; but wishing me good luck. 🙄😑
I really needed to hear this message in my current situation. I'm not going to cave in.
I tried to pull away but I collapsed. Lol..I felt horrible and went back a few days later. And he ignored me completely.
I am super embarrassed..lol
Happens to the best of us.
You will be fine keep moving forward.
🎯 6 mths...spot on yet again E! ✌️
Wow. Good analogy in the first less than 3 mins.
I think this is one of your best videos!!!!!
Love you Elliot Scott my favourite dating coach 😘 🔔 ✔️ now ❤️ me 4️⃣ ever! 😘
What if I haven't invested in him yet, and he has been chasing me for the past year? He was amping up the flirting hardcore for three weeks, and this was when I actually started responding and showing interest by flirting back (just flirting with my eyes and body language, nothing else). He kept showing an intense interest, and then bam! He had his own little mental panic where things started to seem more real, and then he stopped responding positively to my flirts (he would quickly look away if I caught him looking at me, and now he's probably questioning whether I am clingy or not). At this point, I felt like the only option was to pull away, but still acknowledge his presence; but just not maintain eye contact. He started looking at me again, but I look at him to acknowledge his presence for 2 seconds and be polite, and then look away and carry on with whatever I am doing. In your opinion, am I getting off to a good start? I don't want to act catty towards him, but I don't want to give him attention either. All I can say is that this is all sure going to be an interesting endeavor to say the least! 😉😎
Ignore himmmmmmmm
I asked for space but I knew I was out for good . Either way They always come back 🤷♀️ 6 months ,1 year 4 years.🤷♀️
My favorite advice and video of you. Thank you. Have to let things go
Always!
my ex came back after 3 months and i so stupidly let him back and him thinking he came back cus he missed me but now i learnt he was out looking of other girls and when i let him back second time, he was stringing me along lol
@@soniastarmorales8013 yea he left me again but tbh i’m so over it lol, it’s weird third time he left me i got over it fast cus this time i met new amazing people & did things with my life lol
@@mizzcrazygal stay safe please. Prayers for you n know that you will find a true genuine sincere guy.
Love your channel Elliot! Thanks for tips❤️🙏
Well... If i can say f this guy, im done with this bs, why would i pull away? I'd just break up 🤷 (which i did 3 weeks ago).
thanks Elliot! super insightful!
Lol!!! I could miss Disney always it's my favorite place and I would never get sick of it! 😂🤣😂
You’re like saving my life
If he is ignoring you, he doesn’t like you or believes that the silent treatment is the best way to handle things.
What if you actually tell the guy that you’re dating someone else and you can’t see him anymore?
God bless you!!! Thanks, El!
So if you pull back pull back but if you ping back it’s game over….????
What's better when he come back after 1month or months?
If they reach out, but not saying anything significant, should we respond?
Nooo
You should only respond when the quality you are expecting it's meet.
He will keep you dodging and playing with his low quality responses if you allow him to.
Just back away for your own good and value, and if he doesn't get better, forget him. There are at least 10000000000 more men you can get. Life is full of choices ✨
I always enjoy your videos. God Bless u more. More wisdom.
I am doing withdrawal it’s has been 2 1/2 days. I still like him and wanting him but I am ashamed of myself when I read back my pursuing texted to him trying to get him to commit a relationship with me. He’s a never my type but that’s something bout him that I like much.
If after 6 months, and they still don’t come around does it mean they may never come around again in the future? I’ve moved on for the most part but I always have a soft spot for this guy.
You should definitely move on and never expect him to come back! However, know that men do come back, even after six months. Just do not wait him. But I do think he will come back for, at least, checking how you are doing without him
I have seen stories of people coming back after 2, 5, 7..10, 20 years!! When they finish another relationship, when they are tired of being alone etc. 😅
When you wait, you send out 'desperate vibrations' in the universe. Just don't expect anything. Get on with your life. He might come out of nowhere, but it's best not to think of it or wait for it
Great advice per usual!
I’ve expressed my needs (semi long distance and he’s legitimately busy building a business) and there for the most part going unmet, do I need to let him know I’m done ? Last we spoke he agreed we need to make time to talk, Text check in with each other. But I’m feeling like pulling away anyway. I love him but he’s not making enough time for me. So again , do I need to clarify the reason I’m done or can I just disappear?
I honestly give back the same energy, if im left on read for a day I'll do it back, maybe 2 fold. I can't waste my time and date around other dudes
I stumbled upon his youtube history and he's also watching videos on no contact, so it looks like there is no hope.
Thanks, Elliot ! X
your analogy made me laugh, thank you! I needed to laugh :)
I ignored him for one day and found him apologizing to me for not being available and ignoring me ....I love him so much but I want him to move forward to me .... so I will keep ignoring him for some time ...he should realize who I am to him
We don't have a romantic relationship, he look at me as his older sister, b'coz I'm 3 years older than him & we've lost communication for almost 3 years and all of a sudden, he chatted me & making some video calls on me & when I kept declining, he didn't stop to make a video call, he's saying that he's missing talking to me.
Thanks Eliot
What if he is talking to other women?
Thank you for your video, well explained👏🏽🙏🏽
How do you ignore him and move on with my life, for the fact that he doesn't care, never call or text you but I keep doing all these yet he will say I love and put his work and desires first b4 me
I'm the type who finds it soo difficult ignoring people or not talking to them. I feels guilty whenever I does that to someone, that's my nature. Please help I want move on with my life and not think of him
My fiancé pulled away because of my son’s sever oppositional defiant disorder. He yells at my fiancé and his children…
There are other problems with my son that I can’t get control of and he is going to live with his dad next month- for the male structure I can’t give.
I wonder if ignoring him is what I should do in this situation. He hasn’t responded to my last text and it’s been 24hr. Was never like this before.
No such thing as oppositional defiant behaviour...Its just for big pharma to sell their "products". I'm surprised you got a fiance with children from another man in this day and age 🤣
I wish you were like, my brother. You’d be awesome to just call and talk to.
He can't come back he's f.... BLOCKED
Timely video for me, thank you Elliot ❤😊
Hope you enjoyed it!
I did, thank you