The be a Christian man you must never forget that you are an adopted son of God and must act like one at all times! You must also never forget that all women are God's creation and thus also can become daughters of the Heavenly Father! Now, you would not treat a woman whose father is a special forces sniper how much more-so would you not abuse a daughter of an all powerful God who also holds the key to your judgement and gift of eternal life!
@@kennyh5083 Go to your churches and tell them. Christians get divorces and abortions at a much higher rate than their secular counterparts. And they have been for nearly 5 decades. Never forget Duggie is selling books. This is a sales pitch for selling his books. Since when does Duggie an authority on what women want? Does he have ovaries, a uterus, and menstrual cycles?
And you will seek Me and find Me when you search for Me with all your heart. -Jeremiah 29:13 “For God so loved the world, that He gave His only Son, so that everyone who believes in Him will not perish, but have eternal life. -John 3:16 Repent therefore, and turn back, that your sins may be blotted out. - Acts 3:19 :) .
Heretical prayer: O Mother of Perpetual Help, thou art the dispenser of all the gifts which God grants to us miserable sinners; and for this end He has made thee so powerful, so rich, and so bountiful, in order that thou mayest help us in our misery. Thou art the advocate of the most wretched and abandoned sinners who have recourse to thee: come to my aid, for I recommend myself to thee. In thy hands I place my eternal salvation, and to thee I entrust my soul. Count me among thy most devoted servants; take me under thy protection, and it is enough for me. For, if thou protect me, I fear nothing; not from my sins, because thou wilt obtain for me the pardon of them; nor from the devils, because thou art more powerful than all hell together; nor even from Jesus, my judge, because by one prayer from thee He will be appeased. But one thing I fear: that in the hour of temptation I may through negligence fail to have recourse to thee and thus perish miserably. Obtain for me, therefore, the pardon of my sins, love for Jesus, final perseverance, and the grace ever to have recourse to thee, O Mother of Perpetual Help. This is a legit Catholic prayer, look up "O Mother of Perpetual Help" if you want to know if it’s legit. This is super heretical. This doctrine of invoking departed saints doesn’t seem just like "hey it’s like praying to a friend.". . : )
He already has a book, or books. This is his sales pitch. His teachings is what has caused Christians to be getting divorces at a far greater rate than their secular counterparts for nearly 5 decades. Its is nothing more than an excuse for sexism and misogyny.
It's possible to be sympathetic and outwardly gentle whiles being inwardly firm and immoveable. A godly woman wants a man that isn't moved by the storms of anger and wrath, and remains firmly peaceful in the midst of chaos. A man that is so certain on truth that he knows the right time for everything, and cam discern good from evil in all situations. A man with backbone doesn't get tossed to and fro by the waves and remains steadfast, who seeks to please God by being a faithful steward of the souls he's been entrusted with, demonstrating the grace of God in a life exuding praise, worship and honour to Jesus the Son of God.
That’s a wonderful platitude, but impossible on this side of eternity. Only Jesus can do that. We shall be like Him one day, but until then, imperfections abound!
This is so funny, I literally just had my third date and proceeded to ask her father if we could date in a more serious capacity (thankfully he is a Christian). Doug's letters are eerily well timed...
And you will seek Me and find Me when you search for Me with all your heart. -Jeremiah 29:13 “For God so loved the world, that He gave His only Son, so that everyone who believes in Him will not perish, but have eternal life. -John 3:16 Repent therefore, and turn back, that your sins may be blotted out. - Acts 3:19 :) .
Heretical prayer: O Mother of Perpetual Help, thou art the dispenser of all the gifts which God grants to us miserable sinners; and for this end He has made thee so powerful, so rich, and so bountiful, in order that thou mayest help us in our misery. Thou art the advocate of the most wretched and abandoned sinners who have recourse to thee: come to my aid, for I recommend myself to thee. In thy hands I place my eternal salvation, and to thee I entrust my soul. Count me among thy most devoted servants; take me under thy protection, and it is enough for me. For, if thou protect me, I fear nothing; not from my sins, because thou wilt obtain for me the pardon of them; nor from the devils, because thou art more powerful than all hell together; nor even from Jesus, my judge, because by one prayer from thee He will be appeased. But one thing I fear: that in the hour of temptation I may through negligence fail to have recourse to thee and thus perish miserably. Obtain for me, therefore, the pardon of my sins, love for Jesus, final perseverance, and the grace ever to have recourse to thee, O Mother of Perpetual Help. This is a legit Catholic prayer, look up "O Mother of Perpetual Help" if you want to know if it’s legit. This is super heretical. This doctrine of invoking departed saints doesn’t seem just like "hey it’s like praying to a friend.". . : )
A friend of mine just asked her crush out, and I'm thinking, "Why him and not me?" Not in a pouty "oh poor me" sort of way, just curious. Turns out, I'm a pushover. Thank you for this. God bless.
She was a friend of yours that's why. Was there anything more than friendship? However, SHE asked her crush out and it can work when women ask men out, but it's generally not a good move on her side either. How did you know you were a pushover? Did she tell you?
If a woman tells me she wants Mexican when I pull in to the Chinese restaurant, she’s not getting a second date. It’s better to live on a roof than with a contentious woman.
You married yet ? Doesn't sound like it. Why not ask her "Hon, are you in the mood for any type of food tonight, or something particular ?" Asking HER to opine is the best way forward. Frequently she'll reply "I don't know Dear, what do YOU want" ? Your comment has it backwards....
@@psalm2forliberty577 you didn’t watch the video. In the scenario, she already said she didn’t have an opinion on where to eat. The conversation had already been had.
I agree. Im not for the games at all haha. If im ignorant to the realities of marriage and this is a actually common occurrence i dont think i could pass her 'unconcious' tests regularly. Im having a hard to not putting it in the category of sin. We should be growing in self awareness and the ability to control our tongues through sanctification. Idk though. Flesh IS tricky and I am far from married currently lol.
@@recon7773 being double tongued and double minded is a sin. We are to have our “yes” be yes and to let our “no” be no. We are to say what we mean. Even if these games aren’t sinful, they’re at least extremely rude. If I made plans for a date that she consented to go to, and randomly changes her mind to see how I’ll react, that’s at the very least rude, and not a precedent I want taken into marriage. I don’t want to introduce a woman like that to my mother.
@@StormySquad1 Yea. You have a point. Ill just take it as this wasnt the best example from pastor Doug Wilson. I do believe there is that 'unconcious' nature in women based on the genesis 3 situation so his advice will still be applicable. Ill take his modeled response at the very least.
Well said! I find that what makes a man more attractive to God often makes him less attractive to women these days. Paul was definitely on to something when he visited Corinth (1 Corinthians 7 : 32-34).
Yes, unfortunately. But life isn't about women thankfully xD Still, if men were all doing that they should be and if the church was listening to 1 Corinthians in holding the culture accountable to their roles within the church, it would be very hard for any woman who wasn't interested in righteousness to remain in a comfortable social situation or relationship if she was also trying to be part of a church
God loves you as you are. It's not about what you do to make yourself attractive to God. He doesn't needs you. But he wants you. It's about what he's done for you, not what you've done for him
@@smokingcrab2290 that is true enough but also 1 What shall we say then? Are we to continue in sin that grace may abound? 2 By no means! How can we who died to sin still live in it? 3 Do you not know that all of us who have been baptized into Christ Jesus were baptized into his death? 4 We were buried therefore with him by baptism into death, in order that, just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father, we too might walk in newness of life. How we live does not effect our justification but it is a part of our sanctification.
Lol Doug does but he's careful not to be seen as beating up on you because of your sensitivity (given the reality of the culture we live in, women frankly need a lot more rebuke and correction than the young men, and the ladies cry foul over it). You can find more stuff by that Rachel jankovich lady, though I don't know how much of that is focused on relationships
I've heard some of his videos towards women and he doesn't really pull punches, so I don't think he is doing as you say he does to conserve feelings. Doug has a lot more videos for men, understandably so since he is a man and, counter to your opinion, men need a lot of help just like women 🙂 He is often rebuking women in the videos for men, but they are not specifically for the audience of women. I've seen a lot of Rachel's videos. They are good, but definitely not as in depth. They tend to be in response to one type of woman or teaching towards women, rather than on a wider variety of topics. And, she doesn't really do dating advice. Also, although I HIGHLY disagree that women need more rebuke (have you met men?), women have definitely been conditioned (often, interestingly, by men) to think that men don't have a right to rebuke us or teach us how to be godly women. So, I agree with that one thing. Nonetheless, it would be interesting to see how Doug would advise women more in depth than he currently has.
@@kaitlinrose6352 lol yes I've met both, and I can guarantee you that the entirety of the public school system, legal system, cinema, mass media, Big Eva, academia, etc is not geared toward affirming men in every way that whatever their natural male-specific sinful tendencies are virtues. Women do have that, and given that they are more easily deceived by nature, it's even more urgent for them to be warned before they develop too much "sunk cost" in their belief system. Oh yeah there are bad voices influencing men also, but they are the fringe and not the mainstream, or else it's communicated that the influences are bad, but that is not so for female vices. If I had to overly generalize with a single word, the biggest cultural ditch that men are prone to fall into in this generation is bitterness. Not being an idiot. I agree there's not a lot of advice videos for the ladies. I've only within the last year become aware of a ministry that isn't very active on social media, but has been a positive influence on Christian women: the botkin sisters. You can find a sample of their advice by searching for "it's not about staying at home" which will lead you to an hour download of a talk they gave. They have a few books you can look into which were written a decade or so ago and offer the practical application on dating you're looking for. Or listen to mature single men who are definitely keen on sharing their opinions, lol -- but when you find one like that, he'll probably be your husband. I agree that we can ask him to consider doing a similar "dear Dawson" style series toward an imaginary daughter/niece/granddaughter and giving her relevant advice. One way it would help guys like me is by seeing an example of what actually constitutes gentleness, so we're not prone to be either harsh or timid. On that note, I expect the first woman I can talk to who doesn't react like I'm attacking her when I'm not is probably going to be my wife. Maturity ❤️
@@kaitlinrose6352 ironically RUclips comments would seem to be a great way to observe someone's communication toward/about women and their theology, so as to get in touch, but I don't think RUclips had had private messaging for a decade or more now.
His daughters Becka and Rachel have a podcast called “What Have You” that is largely what you’re looking for. Rachel is also on Instagram and is good about responding to DMs if you have a specific question. They are primarily geared towards women who are already married, but they have a lot of good insights for Christian womanhood in general (and they can be pretty funny).
"Uncle Douglas", "Blessed is the one who finds wisdom and the one who gets understanding, for the gain from her is better than gain from silver and her profit is better than gold. She is more precious than jewels, and nothing you desire can compare with her. Long life is in her right hand; in her left hand are riches and honor. Her ways are ways of pleasantness, and all her paths are peace. She is a tree of life to those who lay hold of her; those who hold her fast are called blessed." Proverbs 3:13-18. you have shared nothing short of wisdom. and I will surely cherish your understanding. thank you so much! please never stop doing what you're doing. -With Respect, Silas.
C. 3:00 "if he can't stand up to her, she knows he can't stand up for her." THIS is the Christian answer to the red-pill/mgtow teaching, for that is what it is, on "shit-tests" etc. The world can tell that something's going on but they do what Spurgeon says, and get it "almost right," and prescribe the wrong answers to the issue, eg standing up to her by sinning, or fleeing.
Red-pill/MGTOW men are actually unwittingly doing what Paul told men to do in 1st Corinthians 7. THIS has been an excellent witnessing opportunity by the way! "I want you to be free from anxieties. The unmarried man is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to please the Lord. But the married man is anxious about worldly things, how to please his wife, and his interests are divided." - 1 Corinthians 7 : 32-3 Notice how Paul sets up a dichotomy between the will of women (the world) and the will of God. They (red-pill/MGTOW) men see the true nature of women, but it is the Word of God that completes their understanding of why women are that way. Now is the time for men to focus on the Lord as instructed by Paul and set aside worldly things (women). EDIT: Grammar
I've watched his whole series in one go. There are lots of similarities with the red pill. Actually, I'm amazed that I cannot tell from the to of my head a single instance of what he said to be in contradiction to red pill awareness. The main difference is the motivation, of course.
@@kevinmiller6443 I would say they don't see the complete picture, but tend to have a better awareness of sinful and worldly natures of women and not discerning the neutral human nature or the imago dei. So their analysis is nearly entirely negative and they never really can argue for why a man would want to be in a relationship with a woman except for sex, because all the advice they have reasoned to is about how to suppress her vices rather than draw out her virtues.
@@KiltedTupiniquin in this video, in particular, he gives a far more holistic explanation of the psychology behind the shit-test. RPA would say she's trying to see how much she can control you, and don't explore why, and leave it at that. Doug explains that the underlying good created desire is to have stability, and someone who is easily manipulated can not be trusted to be faithful or consistent in his work, conduct, etc. Mature women will not be manipulative, but since secular RPAs are not generally attracted to or given a chance by Reformed girls, all their interactions are with the immature and worldly women. Where the RP advice would fall short therefore is in failing to realize that it's not just her they need to stand up to, but that her concern is that you'll stand up to other women, too. Indeed, most of the MGTOW advice pivots on the threat that they can walk away and find another woman if she doesn't stay in her lane, which fails to resolve the underlying issue. So it's an implicit contradiction.
@@horrificpleasantry9474 The virtues have to exist in the first place if there is any hope of even drawing them out. Unfortunately, these days Western women provide no evidence which indicate that is even an option. Even (and especially) women that claim to be Christian, they are indistinguishable from the rest. THAT is why these men do that. They are working with the evidence they are given, and turning their backs on the world (women). Fortunately, a man turning his back on the world is the first step towards Jesus Christ, and I try to help them understand that.
These are so excellent. I want both of my young adult sons, 17 and 19, to listen to them. Is there any way to put the "Letters to a Fictional Nephew" series in a playlist so they are easy to find?
I would like that these series have subtitles in Spanish . I would like to share the message with my brothers, unfortunately not all understand English. Sorry for my poor English, all your teachings bless me and I try to explain to my son . God bless you .
Been married 12 years. The woman I love and have 3 kids with has no desire for me. She is wrapped up in the church. It’s gotten to the point I don’t go to church anymore! Sorry but I was homeless at 14, joined the Marines at 20 did two combat deployments. Then broke myself on oil rigs trying to support my family. Held my mothers hand for four months while she died from cancer. Lord knows I’m far from perfect, but I’m tired of fighting. I give she wins.
I thought once a Marine, Always a Marine.... What's a matter? Stopped eating your recommended daily allowance of crayons? Repent! Get some grit in yer craw. It is written: "But the cowardly, unbelieving, abominable, murderers, sexually immoral, sorcerers, idolaters, and all liars shall have their part in the lake which burns with fire and brimstone, which is the second death.” No. 1 in that list is " Cowardly" You got aches? Pains? Walk it off. You are not just a Marine... You were bought at a price, and you are not your own. Therefore, pray and ask for strength, and healing, that you can resume your role as point man in your family. Also, respect yourself, if you don't, how will you have her respect? You are her platoon sergeant, she is your corporal, and any kids you have are pvts or pfcs. But you-all answer to the Capt of your Salvation. Act accordingly! Take initiative... Realize that there is a war on... And Satan will smash your family to bits. How's alimony and child support sound? Prayer is your guided weapon, and your resupply. Leadership is the "Follow Me" way. The bible is your manual at arms, and your GPS. Set Christ as your iron sight, and get to humping yer ruck! When you get that right, other things will fall in.
@@holinessofthebride1935 wow so much has happened in the two years since I made this comment. We are in a much better place. We are currently attending a messianic synagogue. Are family has been healed by Christ! My wife and I are more in love with each other than we ever have been.
You are so right in general! Sadly so many women say they want a guy that is xyz and usually it’s not the case. Some women to be fair are better at being aware of what they want and need in a alpha male that will take care of her but not to many in our confused society
@@yayforeals because if you can't be bothered to do a basic minimum of research before ordering your life around a philosophy, then you are not acting like a Christian and that makes you a liability
@@horrificpleasantry9474 This Convo isn’t being very respectful now and if you want to continue in that arrogant tone then maybe you should look in the mirror before you accuse of me not acting ‘Christian’ because the Bible condemns that which any Sunday school kid can tell you
@@yayforeals you've just exposed yourself by how you reacted. I was speaking hypothetically and you took it personally, which is a sign of guilt -- that you are described by my statements -- and defensiveness, which is pride.
So if I’m following, whenever my girlfriend makes a request; she really doesn’t mean it, she just wants me to be firm with her and do what I want to show how tough I am ?
They are 100% hardwired to be submissive to "authority". She wants to be dominated to her very core. No matter what you hear, 100% are submissive to whoever they believe their authority is. "Equality" is a satanic lie to destroy relationships. There is no female "equal" to you. Nearly all of society is brainwashed with satanic feminism, yes even Christians. Happy Wife Happy Life is trash. Wasting your time trying to make her happy will result in 100% failure. She's happy when you're happy, that's it. I'm not saying to be mean, but telling her what to do is a good start. Here's a good video showing that they are really liars and phony's that will conform to whoever they perceive to be dominant: Reddit Proves Hypergamous Women On Tinder Have No Moral Compass
@@horrificpleasantry9474 well let’s reverse the situations. What should the woman do if she made the reservation and the man wants to go to the Mexican place ?
@@davidfayfield6594 why would he consent to Chinese and then change his mind? That's not a thing that men do. Male shit-tests are more in the form of vulgar language or physical intimacy, but seeing if she'll stand up for herself is almost never done over dinner reservations. So basically your hypothetical guy is acting like an immature girl. The lady should remind him that he agreed to Chinese so she made reservations (why would this happen if you're doing it the Biblical way where the man leads?), and if he decides to press the issue, drop him like a hot potato. But a Biblical girl is not going to be the one to make the reservations and drive them, so this is a problem easily avoided by not being worldly
@@davidfayfield6594That shouldn't be happening in the first place. She isn't only wearing the pants in that situation, you've taken on wearing the skirt.
She is, and at the same time you're obligated to "live with her in an understanding way," meaning if she doesn't trust you not to be lured by other women, find out why and fix it
@@grantarmbruster6591 that's sin that you would need to gently but firmly confront from scripture. But you would need to question and be absolutely certain that that's what it is, to respond that way. Don't assume that as your first choice
I don't agree with obedience to men this implies she is a non capable child with no common sense. Then you ask her to raise your children while you also treat her as the child. This shows the kids they rule her too.
Goodwill clearance is the shiat ... they tag stuff so its not really on a particular rack ...50% that color tag day... 6 dollar shirt turns into 3 bucks .. yeah you gotta dig and you cant get what you exactly want on that day but if you are patient and go a few times for a couple weeks you can get an entire wardrobe of nice clothes ... if you live in an upper middle class area anyway ... lol.
I did something like this to someone who was influencing my husband. Not because I was attracted to him but I needed to test my suspicion that the man was a whiny finger pointing bully. I was right. Thankfully my husband started to see it and quit allowing the influence to dominate him, he turned to Christ instead and not because I was pushing my husband to do so.
What if its too late? Passed 50 never married and no kids. Is there any hope for me? And is it too late for me to get back into church? I don't know what to do anymore ? Is all hope lost?
How old are you? Between your mid thirties and fifties, you get the opportunity to expand your age range 15 years younger, which gives you MANY options. If you're not married by 22, you pretty much lose your chance to marry someone your age, and in your late twenties are stuck where someone ten years younger is usually too young, but once you're 34 and can go for 24-26 year olds, things change
It's not too late. God can always turn a situation around it you turn to His word in faith. Put it in the Lord's hands by getting up again. Stand in victory of Jesus Christ
5:40 yes, children test their parents, and women test their mates. Don't think about that proving Schopenhauer right or anything. Women remain this way their whole lives unless taught differently by an involved male authority figure.
@@studiobencivengamarcusbenc5272 I know you're not joking. Gynecologists sometimes have to explain to clients that canine semen lingers longer than human semen. Yeah...
@@adamwalker2377 Please tell me you’re joking.. What a weird thing to double down on. You’re certainly not a gynaecologist are you. Dog sperm and human sperm both have lifespans around five days.
This is what PUAs call "shit tests". If you want to play that game, go ahead. 8:00 unless she's in a bad mood. Then you're abusive, and your reputation is shot.
And we know... she WILL be in a bad mood. Christian men need to quit idolizing women, or we will find ourselves walking in the footsteps of David, Samson, Job, Lot, etc.
I got married early in my christian walk. I'm starting to learn these details recently. Especially about roles and responsibilities. Can beta become alpha? Maybe it's apart of me growing in christ to want to be more.
So what I gathered: 1. Condition your future wife early. 2. Women don’t know what they want, they need to be told what they want. 3. Women are easily swayed. 4. Leave a potential wife if she doesn’t comply with your dinner plans.
Only commenting because I haven’t seen anyone acknowledge that this teaching violates many biblical principles. I’ll only type out one, The golden rule. Do you want to be tested? Do you want to be set up? Would you want your words to be disrespected and told that the other person knows what you really want? This thinking is entirely disrespectful and has no place in a godly relationship.
Yes 100%, i don't always want a yes man. And my husband doesn't always want a yes wife. We should challenge each other to become the better version of ourselves. I am not talking about day to day operations of managing our household. I am talking about emotional relationships and our spiritual relationships. I have never had to have this debate with my husband on restaurant. But early on I knew he wasn't afraid to make a stand.
Nearly everything a man does in this modern age to "attract" a female is 100% a waste of time and energy with no gain, and nearly 100% of females are brainwashed and subservient into satanic feminist ideology subconsciously, as are submissive men, yes even Christians. "Equality" is a satanic myth. There is no female equal to you. If you think you are equal, then you already lost. They only want one thing: to be dominated. 100% of women are hardwired to be submissive to "authority". If they are not submissive to you, you already lost. Not saying to be mean, but telling them what to do is a good start. Happy Wife Happy Life is 💩. You can enjoy that personally but if it's your goal then you failed already. She's happy when you're happy, that's it. You waste your time trying to make her happy and it will fail 100% of the time. To find out what they really want, that really everything they say is a phony lie and they will conform to whoever they believe to be their dominant authority, try this RUclips video: Reddit Proves Hypergamous Women On Tinder Have No Moral Compass
Some things I agree with. (Although we can’t assume every woman is the same and allow for diversity of personality) However, the idea of leadership must be understood in the full context of Ephesians starting in chapter one where the body of Christ is called to service to one another and in unity of the body of Christ. This informs the kind of leadership that is biblical. Paul calls men to a sacrificial selfless leadership. It is not a “I’m the boss” kind of posture, rather a dying to one’s self in humility. He is responsible for the well being of the home and (with counsel from his wife) makes decisions that best serves the family and actually prioritizes their needs over and above his own. A man who lacks the humility to help out around the house with domestic responsibilities when he can see his wife is tired, is not a selfless leader. A biblical leader is sensitive to the needs of his wife and, should be willing to serve his wife when he can see she is stressed out and tired. There should be a mutual service out of love for one another. This is not transactional. Often the natural result of such an attitudes, can lead to a more vibrant sex more. When women feel like their husband is valuing her needs and her husband is sensitive to that, she will often crave deeper connection with her husband. The statements made that a godly man is not sensitive or caring for his wife’s emotions is a recipe for a very unhappy and unfulfilling marriage.
For what good internet comments are for convincing anyone, let's try anyway. For one, who told you that you are ugly? Consider the source! Truth is women care less than no men about their partner being good looking. Yes less is not nothing but it's not critical either. Look at picture of married couples, young, old, middle aged, 1990s 1960s and into the past. Most men just look average, and up til recently most men found partners and married. We did not become ugly all of a sudden, so neither have you. Better to focus your attention and energy on doing what's good, honourable, noble, virtuous etc. It will help you become strong, strong in a way that makes you good to any woman regardless off your looks, makes you good for the woman who does choose you and whom you choose, and makes you good for the people around you as well. That is what counts. As you become that it does affect your face and presence, it is an inner fire that give warmth and energy to yourself.
On the contrary, not getting female attention because of your looks alone is a blessing because you know if they're interested in you because of your character
@@stefan-rarescrisan5116 then you're not thinking rightly. Do you want a woman who will leave you for a hotter guy? If the answer is yes, keep being insecure. If the answer is no, then your looks don't matter, because the woman you should be interested in is someone who doesn't say yes to you because you're physically attractive but because she's attracted to your character. If you don't have good character, fix that before even dreaming of a relationship. The only relevance your physical appearance should have is • its ability to glorify God • its ability to be courteous to others by not being offensive • its ability to show respect and care for a future partner by being willing to please them • it's ability to reflect on your personal discipline If you are attempting to get attention and praise for your appearance, or be sensually provocative, then you are being ungodly. And then your appearance is the least of your problems and your fixation on it is a sign of not having a right view of God/sin/the nature of man/yourself. Self examine
" I'll make reservations". And instead of pulling into the parking lot and telling her "this were we are eating to night like it or not, because you didn't make preference " ( that will probably be your last date with her ) the wise thing he could do is call her earlier and say "I made reservations at Chinese restaurant is that ok".
You are still asking for permission in your phrasing. “I got us reservations for Chinese, do you still want to go out?” Tonight would accomplish the videos intent better.
@@bonnevillebagger9147 That works too, at least your showing her respect of her opinion .Your going to be hard ass in the beginning , see how long the last with any self respecting person. or ( I got us reservations for Chinese ,do you still want to go out Tonight' ? and the response she'll give - the only I'll go out with you is, if we have Mexican food. now the balls back in your court .) lol.
This is so much redundant overthinking. Just be unapologetically you and stop overthinking it. It also amazes me how DW gives a free pass to women to perform these nonsensical arbitrary "tests" saying she doesn't know she's doing it, but she has every right to. And then you're an idiot of you don't know what's going on. Here's the real solution: just be you. Be normal. Be human. Don't complicate it. Don't feed into her games. Her tests over Chinese food or Mexican aren't necessary. Your evaluation of her character is what's necessary.
You say women want a man who makes respecting him easy. But the problem is you ask 10 different women what they find respectable and they'll all give you 1000 different answers. And it changes daily. If you don't live up to a woman's arbitrary subjective expectations, they will disrespect you. And you will be blamed by Doug Wilson for her lack of respect. No matter how well you're fulfilling your role.
I know what you are saying. Respect comes with being a wife, even if she does not find her husband lives up to expectations. Showing respect and practicing obedience is simply part of the job of a wife. It does not hinge on the subjective end of things. It hinges on whether she has said "I do."
@@horrificpleasantry9474 lol. Or you just agree that tacos are always a better decision than Chinese and you know that you can choose to flaunt your authority and firm resolve at later time if you wish. Husbands, love your wives as Christ loves his church and gave himself up for her. You can at least give up your pride, you tiny weak man, and just go get the tacos.
@@JohnnyStuttle you're not listening, and that is NOT a sound application of that verse. You think Jesus dying on the cross was an inconvenience because he could've just said "fine, I'll let you worship tacos" ??
Getting tired of this topic, really. Been married for over a decade now, and I can tell you that God, through Paul's letter to the Ephesians, puts it as succint as it can possibly be stated: "Husbands, love your wives...Wives, respect your husbands." All this "how to be a man" stuff and "what women want" stuff is overly complex and ultimately oppressive. Men, assuming you're not a brute on the one hand or a wallflower on the other, if a woman you're courting does not respect you, then leave her for another woman who does or no woman at all. Simple as that. You don't have to endure "tests" or other machinations of her mind. You are not a car to be taken for a spin. Either she will reciprocate your love with love and respect or she can get lost. My wife has never made me feel less than a winner, even in spite of my faults and weaknesses, and I continue to GROW in maturity because of it. She has a similar story - all this with community, patience, and prayer...no freaking "tests."
If you leave as soon as they show they're not up to par on a particular standard (say respect) when they're not yet your wife, then how have you left room to grow?
@@skylershuman7705 Respecting a loved one, friend...anyone...is "Human Relations 101." For an adult who fails this, abandoning the relationship may be the most expedient means of personal development for such an individual; even if not, there are billions of other choices. Moreover, a person who thinks himself/herself worthy of explicitly testing another is a narcissist.
@@robjvmedia260 Interesting and helpful clarification. I was confused a bit about your usage of growing but leaving. Thanks for that. I've seen the tests Douglas is talking about, and I do sometimes feel like they are necessary from a certain perspective. If you're not tested by outside forces, then people will want to test you themselves.
Enjoying this episode? Check out Doug's, "The Lie of Servant Leadership"
mycanonplus.com/tabs/search/videos/1688
The be a Christian man you must never forget that you are an adopted son of God and must act like one at all times! You must also never forget that all women are God's creation and thus also can become daughters of the Heavenly Father! Now, you would not treat a woman whose father is a special forces sniper how much more-so would you not abuse a daughter of an all powerful God who also holds the key to your judgement and gift of eternal life!
@@kennyh5083 Go to your churches and tell them. Christians get divorces and abortions at a much higher rate than their secular counterparts. And they have been for nearly 5 decades. Never forget Duggie is selling books. This is a sales pitch for selling his books. Since when does Duggie an authority on what women want? Does he have ovaries, a uterus, and menstrual cycles?
And you will seek Me and find Me when you search for Me with all your heart. -Jeremiah 29:13
“For God so loved the world, that He gave His only Son, so that everyone who believes in Him will not perish, but have eternal life. -John 3:16
Repent therefore, and turn back, that your sins may be blotted out.
- Acts 3:19
:)
.
Heretical prayer: O Mother of Perpetual Help, thou art the dispenser of all the gifts which God grants to us miserable sinners; and for this end He has made thee so powerful, so rich, and so bountiful, in order that thou mayest help us in our misery. Thou art the advocate of the most wretched and abandoned sinners who have recourse to thee: come to my aid, for I recommend myself to thee.
In thy hands I place my eternal salvation, and to thee I entrust my soul. Count me among thy most devoted servants; take me under thy protection, and it is enough for me. For, if thou protect me, I fear nothing; not from my sins, because thou wilt obtain for me the pardon of them; nor from the devils, because thou art more powerful than all hell together; nor even from Jesus, my judge, because by one prayer from thee He will be appeased.
But one thing I fear: that in the hour of temptation I may through negligence fail to have recourse to thee and thus perish miserably. Obtain for me, therefore, the pardon of my sins, love for Jesus, final perseverance, and the grace ever to have recourse to thee, O Mother of Perpetual Help.
This is a legit Catholic prayer, look up "O Mother of Perpetual Help" if you want to know if it’s legit.
This is super heretical. This doctrine of invoking departed saints doesn’t seem just like "hey it’s like praying to a friend.".
.
: )
@@kennyh5083☕️
When this series is finished they could all go together in a book, along the lines of navigating Christian courtship
Agreed. My oldest is wanting a Godly spouse. These are helpful!
I would bet $5 that’s exactly what happens.
Yes! Would love a book so I can help guide my sons and daughters.
Please please please do that!
He already has a book, or books. This is his sales pitch. His teachings is what has caused Christians to be getting divorces at a far greater rate than their secular counterparts for nearly 5 decades. Its is nothing more than an excuse for sexism and misogyny.
This reminds me of what Doug's daughter Rachel says. "One of the best things about my husband is that he's not afraid of me."
Low bar.
I listened to this with my wife. She didn’t deny any of it.
yes because she knows it’s obvious truth, not sure why men think it’s Godly to be soft and passive.
@@Alan-rw3ez because that's what we were taught. churches are castration mills for young boys.
@@conantheseptuagenarian3824 bingo.
I was taught this endlessly by my mother until I opened my eyes.
It's possible to be sympathetic and outwardly gentle whiles being inwardly firm and immoveable.
A godly woman wants a man that isn't moved by the storms of anger and wrath, and remains firmly peaceful in the midst of chaos. A man that is so certain on truth that he knows the right time for everything, and cam discern good from evil in all situations.
A man with backbone doesn't get tossed to and fro by the waves and remains steadfast, who seeks to please God by being a faithful steward of the souls he's been entrusted with, demonstrating the grace of God in a life exuding praise, worship and honour to Jesus the Son of God.
That’s a wonderful platitude, but impossible on this side of eternity. Only Jesus can do that. We shall be like Him one day, but until then, imperfections abound!
This is so funny, I literally just had my third date and proceeded to ask her father if we could date in a more serious capacity (thankfully he is a Christian). Doug's letters are eerily well timed...
Wow what a generous provision by God.
What a happy little accident developed over time and random chances of events lol
And you will seek Me and find Me when you search for Me with all your heart. -Jeremiah 29:13
“For God so loved the world, that He gave His only Son, so that everyone who believes in Him will not perish, but have eternal life. -John 3:16
Repent therefore, and turn back, that your sins may be blotted out.
- Acts 3:19
:)
.
Heretical prayer: O Mother of Perpetual Help, thou art the dispenser of all the gifts which God grants to us miserable sinners; and for this end He has made thee so powerful, so rich, and so bountiful, in order that thou mayest help us in our misery. Thou art the advocate of the most wretched and abandoned sinners who have recourse to thee: come to my aid, for I recommend myself to thee.
In thy hands I place my eternal salvation, and to thee I entrust my soul. Count me among thy most devoted servants; take me under thy protection, and it is enough for me. For, if thou protect me, I fear nothing; not from my sins, because thou wilt obtain for me the pardon of them; nor from the devils, because thou art more powerful than all hell together; nor even from Jesus, my judge, because by one prayer from thee He will be appeased.
But one thing I fear: that in the hour of temptation I may through negligence fail to have recourse to thee and thus perish miserably. Obtain for me, therefore, the pardon of my sins, love for Jesus, final perseverance, and the grace ever to have recourse to thee, O Mother of Perpetual Help.
This is a legit Catholic prayer, look up "O Mother of Perpetual Help" if you want to know if it’s legit.
This is super heretical. This doctrine of invoking departed saints doesn’t seem just like "hey it’s like praying to a friend.".
.
: )
@@leegaesswitz181☕️
As a woman, secular when I married and saved now, I endorse this completely
Me too!
My condolences to your frontal lobes.
As a 22 y/o man in this stage of life, these videos are a lifesaver to biblical masculinity. Thank you.
I'm listening to this whilst wearing a pair of pants I got from the goodwill clearance rack.
Unfathomably based.
I haven’t bought any article of clothing in the last 10 years that wasn’t from the thrift store 😅
Yeah, but would the average woman consider you a catch?
@@jessedphillips define average...and woman...and...nevermind. No, the answer is no.
See, that is also attractive to a thrifty woman. Doug forgets about this dimension of the game.
A friend of mine just asked her crush out, and I'm thinking, "Why him and not me?" Not in a pouty "oh poor me" sort of way, just curious. Turns out, I'm a pushover. Thank you for this. God bless.
She asked him out. You dodged a bullet. That’s dynamic will never change in her.
She was a friend of yours that's why. Was there anything more than friendship? However, SHE asked her crush out and it can work when women ask men out, but it's generally not a good move on her side either.
How did you know you were a pushover? Did she tell you?
If a woman tells me she wants Mexican when I pull in to the Chinese restaurant, she’s not getting a second date. It’s better to live on a roof than with a contentious woman.
You married yet ?
Doesn't sound like it.
Why not ask her "Hon, are you in the mood for any type of food tonight, or something particular ?"
Asking HER to opine is the best way forward.
Frequently she'll reply "I don't know Dear, what do YOU want" ?
Your comment has it backwards....
@@psalm2forliberty577 you didn’t watch the video. In the scenario, she already said she didn’t have an opinion on where to eat. The conversation had already been had.
I agree. Im not for the games at all haha. If im ignorant to the realities of marriage and this is a actually common occurrence i dont think i could pass her 'unconcious' tests regularly. Im having a hard to not putting it in the category of sin. We should be growing in self awareness and the ability to control our tongues through sanctification. Idk though. Flesh IS tricky and I am far from married currently lol.
@@recon7773 being double tongued and double minded is a sin. We are to have our “yes” be yes and to let our “no” be no. We are to say what we mean.
Even if these games aren’t sinful, they’re at least extremely rude. If I made plans for a date that she consented to go to, and randomly changes her mind to see how I’ll react, that’s at the very least rude, and not a precedent I want taken into marriage. I don’t want to introduce a woman like that to my mother.
@@StormySquad1 Yea. You have a point. Ill just take it as this wasnt the best example from pastor Doug Wilson. I do believe there is that 'unconcious' nature in women based on the genesis 3 situation so his advice will still be applicable. Ill take his modeled response at the very least.
Can't sin your way out of a situation you sinned your way into. -Doug Wilson
Good words. Just as a second point, I ask myself, "What makes a man attractive to God?" I do that regardless of whether it gets the woman or not.
Well said!
I find that what makes a man more attractive to God often makes him less attractive to women these days. Paul was definitely on to something when he visited Corinth (1 Corinthians 7 : 32-34).
Yes, unfortunately. But life isn't about women thankfully xD Still, if men were all doing that they should be and if the church was listening to 1 Corinthians in holding the culture accountable to their roles within the church, it would be very hard for any woman who wasn't interested in righteousness to remain in a comfortable social situation or relationship if she was also trying to be part of a church
God loves you as you are. It's not about what you do to make yourself attractive to God. He doesn't needs you. But he wants you. It's about what he's done for you, not what you've done for him
@@smokingcrab2290 that is true enough but also
1 What shall we say then? Are we to continue in sin that grace may abound? 2 By no means! How can we who died to sin still live in it? 3 Do you not know that all of us who have been baptized into Christ Jesus were baptized into his death? 4 We were buried therefore with him by baptism into death, in order that, just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father, we too might walk in newness of life.
How we live does not effect our justification but it is a part of our sanctification.
Canon Press should do short and pithy videos like this advising women. These do, in a sense, advise women, but not in the same way.
Lol Doug does but he's careful not to be seen as beating up on you because of your sensitivity (given the reality of the culture we live in, women frankly need a lot more rebuke and correction than the young men, and the ladies cry foul over it). You can find more stuff by that Rachel jankovich lady, though I don't know how much of that is focused on relationships
I've heard some of his videos towards women and he doesn't really pull punches, so I don't think he is doing as you say he does to conserve feelings. Doug has a lot more videos for men, understandably so since he is a man and, counter to your opinion, men need a lot of help just like women 🙂 He is often rebuking women in the videos for men, but they are not specifically for the audience of women.
I've seen a lot of Rachel's videos. They are good, but definitely not as in depth. They tend to be in response to one type of woman or teaching towards women, rather than on a wider variety of topics. And, she doesn't really do dating advice.
Also, although I HIGHLY disagree that women need more rebuke (have you met men?), women have definitely been conditioned (often, interestingly, by men) to think that men don't have a right to rebuke us or teach us how to be godly women. So, I agree with that one thing. Nonetheless, it would be interesting to see how Doug would advise women more in depth than he currently has.
@@kaitlinrose6352 lol yes I've met both, and I can guarantee you that the entirety of the public school system, legal system, cinema, mass media, Big Eva, academia, etc is not geared toward affirming men in every way that whatever their natural male-specific sinful tendencies are virtues. Women do have that, and given that they are more easily deceived by nature, it's even more urgent for them to be warned before they develop too much "sunk cost" in their belief system. Oh yeah there are bad voices influencing men also, but they are the fringe and not the mainstream, or else it's communicated that the influences are bad, but that is not so for female vices. If I had to overly generalize with a single word, the biggest cultural ditch that men are prone to fall into in this generation is bitterness. Not being an idiot.
I agree there's not a lot of advice videos for the ladies. I've only within the last year become aware of a ministry that isn't very active on social media, but has been a positive influence on Christian women: the botkin sisters. You can find a sample of their advice by searching for "it's not about staying at home" which will lead you to an hour download of a talk they gave. They have a few books you can look into which were written a decade or so ago and offer the practical application on dating you're looking for. Or listen to mature single men who are definitely keen on sharing their opinions, lol -- but when you find one like that, he'll probably be your husband.
I agree that we can ask him to consider doing a similar "dear Dawson" style series toward an imaginary daughter/niece/granddaughter and giving her relevant advice. One way it would help guys like me is by seeing an example of what actually constitutes gentleness, so we're not prone to be either harsh or timid. On that note, I expect the first woman I can talk to who doesn't react like I'm attacking her when I'm not is probably going to be my wife. Maturity ❤️
@@kaitlinrose6352 ironically RUclips comments would seem to be a great way to observe someone's communication toward/about women and their theology, so as to get in touch, but I don't think RUclips had had private messaging for a decade or more now.
His daughters Becka and Rachel have a podcast called “What Have You” that is largely what you’re looking for. Rachel is also on Instagram and is good about responding to DMs if you have a specific question. They are primarily geared towards women who are already married, but they have a lot of good insights for Christian womanhood in general (and they can be pretty funny).
We want men that can manage their emotions and not give vent to every irritation or offense. We don’t want hotheaded whiners and complainers.
Back at ya sister. Goose/gander. Lol
We men want women who love them and aren't a pain in the ass.
But that's such a tall order.
LOL. The lack of self awareness of this woman.. Women are known for being over emotional and complaining about everything and everyone
Wise counsel. Shared with my sons.
"Uncle Douglas", "Blessed is the one who finds wisdom and the one who gets understanding, for the gain from her is better than gain from silver and her profit is better than gold. She is more precious than jewels, and nothing you desire can compare with her. Long life is in her right hand; in her left hand are riches and honor. Her ways are ways of pleasantness, and all her paths are peace. She is a tree of life to those who lay hold of her; those who hold her fast are called blessed." Proverbs 3:13-18. you have shared nothing short of wisdom. and I will surely cherish your understanding. thank you so much! please never stop doing what you're doing. -With Respect, Silas.
This breakdown uncovers the veil of so much of the warped dating norms and confusion today. Thank you!
C. 3:00 "if he can't stand up to her, she knows he can't stand up for her." THIS is the Christian answer to the red-pill/mgtow teaching, for that is what it is, on "shit-tests" etc. The world can tell that something's going on but they do what Spurgeon says, and get it "almost right," and prescribe the wrong answers to the issue, eg standing up to her by sinning, or fleeing.
Red-pill/MGTOW men are actually unwittingly doing what Paul told men to do in 1st Corinthians 7. THIS has been an excellent witnessing opportunity by the way!
"I want you to be free from anxieties. The unmarried man is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to please the Lord. But the married man is anxious about worldly things, how to please his wife, and his interests are divided." - 1 Corinthians 7 : 32-3
Notice how Paul sets up a dichotomy between the will of women (the world) and the will of God. They (red-pill/MGTOW) men see the true nature of women, but it is the Word of God that completes their understanding of why women are that way. Now is the time for men to focus on the Lord as instructed by Paul and set aside worldly things (women).
EDIT: Grammar
I've watched his whole series in one go. There are lots of similarities with the red pill. Actually, I'm amazed that I cannot tell from the to of my head a single instance of what he said to be in contradiction to red pill awareness. The main difference is the motivation, of course.
@@kevinmiller6443 I would say they don't see the complete picture, but tend to have a better awareness of sinful and worldly natures of women and not discerning the neutral human nature or the imago dei. So their analysis is nearly entirely negative and they never really can argue for why a man would want to be in a relationship with a woman except for sex, because all the advice they have reasoned to is about how to suppress her vices rather than draw out her virtues.
@@KiltedTupiniquin in this video, in particular, he gives a far more holistic explanation of the psychology behind the shit-test. RPA would say she's trying to see how much she can control you, and don't explore why, and leave it at that. Doug explains that the underlying good created desire is to have stability, and someone who is easily manipulated can not be trusted to be faithful or consistent in his work, conduct, etc. Mature women will not be manipulative, but since secular RPAs are not generally attracted to or given a chance by Reformed girls, all their interactions are with the immature and worldly women. Where the RP advice would fall short therefore is in failing to realize that it's not just her they need to stand up to, but that her concern is that you'll stand up to other women, too. Indeed, most of the MGTOW advice pivots on the threat that they can walk away and find another woman if she doesn't stay in her lane, which fails to resolve the underlying issue. So it's an implicit contradiction.
@@horrificpleasantry9474 The virtues have to exist in the first place if there is any hope of even drawing them out. Unfortunately, these days Western women provide no evidence which indicate that is even an option. Even (and especially) women that claim to be Christian, they are indistinguishable from the rest.
THAT is why these men do that. They are working with the evidence they are given, and turning their backs on the world (women). Fortunately, a man turning his back on the world is the first step towards Jesus Christ, and I try to help them understand that.
Reforming Marriage (seen beside Doug) is a masterpiece. I strongly recommend it to any married couple.
Please sir, I want some more..
Good advice, wish someone had told me when I was younger.
As a married man with few friends in or looking to be in dating relationships I enjoyed and appreciated this much more than I expected.
Love this content Uncle Douglas! Keep it up!
These are so excellent. I want both of my young adult sons, 17 and 19, to listen to them. Is there any way to put the "Letters to a Fictional Nephew" series in a playlist so they are easy to find?
In lieu of Doug doing so, you can put them in a playlist yourself and share that with your sons
Thank the Lord for practical advice. Such simple truth and wisdom and yet I have never heard any other Christian speak of it this way.
I would like that these series have subtitles in Spanish . I would like to share the message with my brothers, unfortunately not all understand English.
Sorry for my poor English, all your teachings bless me and I try to explain to my son . God bless you .
Uncle Doug leading the way! Keep It up 👏
Been married 12 years. The woman I love and have 3 kids with has no desire for me. She is wrapped up in the church. It’s gotten to the point I don’t go to church anymore! Sorry but I was homeless at 14, joined the Marines at 20 did two combat deployments. Then broke myself on oil rigs trying to support my family. Held my mothers hand for four months while she died from cancer. Lord knows I’m far from perfect, but I’m tired of fighting. I give she wins.
I thought once a Marine, Always a Marine.... What's a matter? Stopped eating your recommended daily allowance of crayons?
Repent! Get some grit in yer craw.
It is written:
"But the cowardly, unbelieving, abominable, murderers, sexually immoral, sorcerers, idolaters, and all liars shall have their part in the lake which burns with fire and brimstone, which is the second death.”
No. 1 in that list is " Cowardly"
You got aches? Pains? Walk it off. You are not just a Marine... You were bought at a price, and you are not your own.
Therefore, pray and ask for strength, and healing, that you can resume your role as point man in your family.
Also, respect yourself, if you don't, how will you have her respect? You are her platoon sergeant, she is your corporal, and any kids you have are pvts or pfcs.
But you-all answer to the Capt of your Salvation. Act accordingly! Take initiative... Realize that there is a war on... And Satan will smash your family to bits. How's alimony and child support sound?
Prayer is your guided weapon, and your resupply. Leadership is the "Follow Me" way. The bible is your manual at arms, and your GPS.
Set Christ as your iron sight, and get to humping yer ruck! When you get that right, other things will fall in.
@@princekermit0 You need to speak with the elders of the church. Tell them that your wife refuses to submit to your authority.
I'm very sorry. I hope you can turn the situation around. Your wife needs to change her attitude.
@@holinessofthebride1935 wow so much has happened in the two years since I made this comment. We are in a much better place. We are currently attending a messianic synagogue. Are family has been healed by Christ! My wife and I are more in love with each other than we ever have been.
@@richardrichard5319 Praise God. That is great news. The Lord does his glorious work.
Thank you once again for a spot on video uncle Doug!!!
Didn't know Idaho had Chinese food spots LOL, and here I was thinking that Uncle Doug got that gut from knocking back brewski's and potatoes
Well Moscow, Idaho is not your typical Idahoan town.
The best Chinese food is rice and potatoes
I know they have Chinese in Boise. For a fact.
You are so right in general! Sadly so many women say they want a guy that is xyz and usually it’s not the case. Some women to be fair are better at being aware of what they want and need in a alpha male that will take care of her but not to many in our confused society
Anyone who thinks alphas and betas are a "thing" is a red flag to me. It's not an accurate description of society.
@@horrificpleasantry9474 I’m sorry but why have that standard?
@@yayforeals because if you can't be bothered to do a basic minimum of research before ordering your life around a philosophy, then you are not acting like a Christian and that makes you a liability
@@horrificpleasantry9474 This Convo isn’t being very respectful now and if you want to continue in that arrogant tone then maybe you should look in the mirror before you accuse of me not acting ‘Christian’ because the Bible condemns that which any Sunday school kid can tell you
@@yayforeals you've just exposed yourself by how you reacted. I was speaking hypothetically and you took it personally, which is a sign of guilt -- that you are described by my statements -- and defensiveness, which is pride.
He’s not exegeting a biblical text; who says the man must be taller?
So if I’m following, whenever my girlfriend makes a request; she really doesn’t mean it, she just wants me to be firm with her and do what I want to show how tough I am ?
If she abruptly contradicts herself on a way that's disrespectful to you, almost. It seems like you're trying to misinterpret
They are 100% hardwired to be submissive to "authority". She wants to be dominated to her very core. No matter what you hear, 100% are submissive to whoever they believe their authority is. "Equality" is a satanic lie to destroy relationships. There is no female "equal" to you. Nearly all of society is brainwashed with satanic feminism, yes even Christians. Happy Wife Happy Life is trash. Wasting your time trying to make her happy will result in 100% failure. She's happy when you're happy, that's it. I'm not saying to be mean, but telling her what to do is a good start.
Here's a good video showing that they are really liars and phony's that will conform to whoever they perceive to be dominant: Reddit Proves Hypergamous Women On Tinder Have No Moral Compass
@@horrificpleasantry9474 well let’s reverse the situations. What should the woman do if she made the reservation and the man wants to go to the Mexican place ?
@@davidfayfield6594 why would he consent to Chinese and then change his mind? That's not a thing that men do. Male shit-tests are more in the form of vulgar language or physical intimacy, but seeing if she'll stand up for herself is almost never done over dinner reservations. So basically your hypothetical guy is acting like an immature girl. The lady should remind him that he agreed to Chinese so she made reservations (why would this happen if you're doing it the Biblical way where the man leads?), and if he decides to press the issue, drop him like a hot potato. But a Biblical girl is not going to be the one to make the reservations and drive them, so this is a problem easily avoided by not being worldly
@@davidfayfield6594That shouldn't be happening in the first place. She isn't only wearing the pants in that situation, you've taken on wearing the skirt.
A masterclass in gaslighting women
Amazing video 💯
Wonderful advice.
Can this series with Dawson & Darla be made into a book? Please!
I’m 23 and I could say he needs to drop another, because messing around too much in the wrong churches got me too soft in a non-biblical way.
I must admit, I snickered out-loud at the "conspiracy of effeminate m-div's" line.
At what point do women get held accountable for this same thing after marriage. Shouldn't they stop push against their husbands and become obedient?
She is, and at the same time you're obligated to "live with her in an understanding way," meaning if she doesn't trust you not to be lured by other women, find out why and fix it
@@horrificpleasantry9474 all very reasonable but I'm actually wondering more about the disobedient testing so to speak not so much distrust
@@grantarmbruster6591 that's sin that you would need to gently but firmly confront from scripture. But you would need to question and be absolutely certain that that's what it is, to respond that way. Don't assume that as your first choice
Yes. They need to do that, and they need to be held accountable to do so.
I don't agree with obedience to men this implies she is a non capable child with no common sense. Then you ask her to raise your children while you also treat her as the child. This shows the kids they rule her too.
Was this also posted a month or two ago? Or something very similar?
Something very similar, I think it's 'Calvinism and Girls'
Goodwill clearance is the shiat ... they tag stuff so its not really on a particular rack ...50% that color tag day... 6 dollar shirt turns into 3 bucks .. yeah you gotta dig and you cant get what you exactly want on that day but if you are patient and go a few times for a couple weeks you can get an entire wardrobe of nice clothes ... if you live in an upper middle class area anyway ... lol.
I did something like this to someone who was influencing my husband. Not because I was attracted to him but I needed to test my suspicion that the man was a whiny finger pointing bully. I was right. Thankfully my husband started to see it and quit allowing the influence to dominate him, he turned to Christ instead and not because I was pushing my husband to do so.
My wife is taller than me. Lol
My Wife's a doctor - Ben Shapiro
Based
Great video. Have shared with many people. Thank you. Proverbs 3:5. Needs more scripture
What if its too late?
Passed 50 never married and no kids. Is there any hope for me?
And is it too late for me to get back into church?
I don't know what to do anymore ?
Is all hope lost?
No brother. It is never too late.
This is very true! All of it!
No cap, we need this low key.
Yeaas, can we please go with women not being "pliable goobers," too? 🤣
When do we get the “Don’t be a pliable goober” t-shirts?
Rare but valuable advice for Christian men
I definitely wish I learned this sooner... I can't help but struggle to see how I'm not out of luck at this point.
How old are you? Between your mid thirties and fifties, you get the opportunity to expand your age range 15 years younger, which gives you MANY options. If you're not married by 22, you pretty much lose your chance to marry someone your age, and in your late twenties are stuck where someone ten years younger is usually too young, but once you're 34 and can go for 24-26 year olds, things change
It's not too late. God can always turn a situation around it you turn to His word in faith. Put it in the Lord's hands by getting up again. Stand in victory of Jesus Christ
Thanks Unc Doug 👍
Thanks uncle!
Nailed it...
5:40 yes, children test their parents, and women test their mates. Don't think about that proving Schopenhauer right or anything.
Women remain this way their whole lives unless taught differently by an involved male authority figure.
If they have not already been "married their dog" - and I am not joking now - the depravity runs deep these days
@@studiobencivengamarcusbenc5272 Sorry, who married their dog??
@@studiobencivengamarcusbenc5272 I know you're not joking. Gynecologists sometimes have to explain to clients that canine semen lingers longer than human semen.
Yeah...
@@adamwalker2377 Please tell me you’re joking.. What a weird thing to double down on. You’re certainly not a gynaecologist are you. Dog sperm and human sperm both have lifespans around five days.
@@aallen5256 I'd heard it was 5 and 3, respectively.
This is what PUAs call "shit tests". If you want to play that game, go ahead.
8:00 unless she's in a bad mood. Then you're abusive, and your reputation is shot.
And we know... she WILL be in a bad mood.
Christian men need to quit idolizing women, or we will find ourselves walking in the footsteps of David, Samson, Job, Lot, etc.
I got married early in my christian walk. I'm starting to learn these details recently. Especially about roles and responsibilities. Can beta become alpha? Maybe it's apart of me growing in christ to want to be more.
Absolutely accurate!!!
Serving by Leading
vs
Leading by Serving
So good
Man, I wish I had Doug as my uncle.
Thank You.
I am forty-three. I never heard this before.
Godliness meets Social Proof
[Ps. Provided she's not allergic to almonds.] 😁
So what I gathered:
1. Condition your future wife early.
2. Women don’t know what they want, they need to be told what they want.
3. Women are easily swayed.
4. Leave a potential wife if she doesn’t comply with your dinner plans.
Only commenting because I haven’t seen anyone acknowledge that this teaching violates many biblical principles. I’ll only type out one, The golden rule. Do you want to be tested? Do you want to be set up? Would you want your words to be disrespected and told that the other person knows what you really want?
This thinking is entirely disrespectful and has no place in a godly relationship.
And the Bible said: You must be taller than your wife.
You nailed that one, uncle!🤣🤣🤣
So, in a sense, standing up for yourself and being nice about it?
Follow-up: Sadly, Dawson followed his uncle's counsel, Lauren tried the almond chicken and violently threw up all night. She is now dating a Latino.
Yes 100%, i don't always want a yes man. And my husband doesn't always want a yes wife. We should challenge each other to become the better version of ourselves. I am not talking about day to day operations of managing our household. I am talking about emotional relationships and our spiritual relationships. I have never had to have this debate with my husband on restaurant. But early on I knew he wasn't afraid to make a stand.
So that's why my last few dates didn't go so well. Thanks, Uncle Doug!
Nearly everything a man does in this modern age to "attract" a female is 100% a waste of time and energy with no gain, and nearly 100% of females are brainwashed and subservient into satanic feminist ideology subconsciously, as are submissive men, yes even Christians. "Equality" is a satanic myth. There is no female equal to you. If you think you are equal, then you already lost. They only want one thing: to be dominated. 100% of women are hardwired to be submissive to "authority". If they are not submissive to you, you already lost. Not saying to be mean, but telling them what to do is a good start.
Happy Wife Happy Life is 💩. You can enjoy that personally but if it's your goal then you failed already. She's happy when you're happy, that's it. You waste your time trying to make her happy and it will fail 100% of the time. To find out what they really want, that really everything they say is a phony lie and they will conform to whoever they believe to be their dominant authority, try this RUclips video: Reddit Proves Hypergamous Women On Tinder Have No Moral Compass
@@bananahammer112 femoids
Lauren, you’re trying the Chinese and that’s that.
It's nice to have you for an uncle!
Some things I agree with. (Although we can’t assume every woman is the same and allow for diversity of personality)
However, the idea of leadership must be understood in the full context of Ephesians starting in chapter one where the body of Christ is called to service to one another and in unity of the body of Christ. This informs the kind of leadership that is biblical. Paul calls men to a sacrificial selfless leadership. It is not a “I’m the boss” kind of posture, rather a dying to one’s self in humility. He is responsible for the well being of the home and (with counsel from his wife) makes decisions that best serves the family and actually prioritizes their needs over and above his own.
A man who lacks the humility to help out around the house with domestic responsibilities when he can see his wife is tired, is not a selfless leader. A biblical leader is sensitive to the needs of his wife and, should be willing to serve his wife when he can see she is stressed out and tired. There should be a mutual service out of love for one another. This is not transactional.
Often the natural result of such an attitudes, can lead to a more vibrant sex more. When women feel like their husband is valuing her needs and her husband is sensitive to that, she will often crave deeper connection with her husband.
The statements made that a godly man is not sensitive or caring for his wife’s emotions is a recipe for a very unhappy and unfulfilling marriage.
Love this, well needed !
So, be honest to me guys, if I'm ugly, that means I start with a serious handicap?
For what good internet comments are for convincing anyone, let's try anyway. For one, who told you that you are ugly? Consider the source! Truth is women care less than no men about their partner being good looking. Yes less is not nothing but it's not critical either. Look at picture of married couples, young, old, middle aged, 1990s 1960s and into the past. Most men just look average, and up til recently most men found partners and married. We did not become ugly all of a sudden, so neither have you. Better to focus your attention and energy on doing what's good, honourable, noble, virtuous etc. It will help you become strong, strong in a way that makes you good to any woman regardless off your looks, makes you good for the woman who does choose you and whom you choose, and makes you good for the people around you as well. That is what counts. As you become that it does affect your face and presence, it is an inner fire that give warmth and energy to yourself.
On the contrary, not getting female attention because of your looks alone is a blessing because you know if they're interested in you because of your character
@@deuteriummeridian8998 beautiful and insightful response, thank you!
@@horrificpleasantry9474 well, maybe, but it doesn't help my natural male confidence to be told by my partner that she loves me despite my ugliness
@@stefan-rarescrisan5116 then you're not thinking rightly. Do you want a woman who will leave you for a hotter guy? If the answer is yes, keep being insecure. If the answer is no, then your looks don't matter, because the woman you should be interested in is someone who doesn't say yes to you because you're physically attractive but because she's attracted to your character. If you don't have good character, fix that before even dreaming of a relationship. The only relevance your physical appearance should have is
• its ability to glorify God
• its ability to be courteous to others by not being offensive
• its ability to show respect and care for a future partner by being willing to please them
• it's ability to reflect on your personal discipline
If you are attempting to get attention and praise for your appearance, or be sensually provocative, then you are being ungodly. And then your appearance is the least of your problems and your fixation on it is a sign of not having a right view of God/sin/the nature of man/yourself.
Self examine
Thanks Uncle
And what you caused within us to make sure we deny all of you.
leading by serving or serving by leading
if the house you live in needs cleaned, there's no sin in cleaning it, wife or no wife
No fault divorce makes all this moot.
"You're taller than she is" - ouf
Would love suggestions for women. I've never been taught what it means to be a wife or even what to look for in a man so I'm a confused mess.
Imagine you get hired by an important CEO to be his assistant. How would you speak to him and treat him? Well, your husband is more important.
" I'll make reservations". And instead of pulling into the parking lot and telling her "this were we are eating to night like it or not, because you didn't make preference " ( that will probably be your last date with her ) the wise thing he could do is call her earlier and say "I made reservations at Chinese restaurant is that ok".
You are still asking for permission in your phrasing. “I got us reservations for Chinese, do you still want to go out?” Tonight would accomplish the videos intent better.
@@bonnevillebagger9147 That works too, at least your showing her respect of her opinion .Your going to be hard ass in the beginning , see how long the last with any self respecting person.
or ( I got us reservations for Chinese ,do you still want to go out Tonight' ? and the response she'll give - the only I'll go out with you is, if we have Mexican food. now the balls back in your court .) lol.
Interesting
Is this AI? Sorry I am just not that familiar with Doug. He is spot on, on everything he said.
The modern woman is even more delusional than the modern man - that's how bad it is 😂
RUclips: "Reddit Proves Hypergamous Women On Tinder Have No Moral Compass"
@@bananahammer112 Tinder is rigged but then again so are the brains of the "users" 😂😳
"Lauren" already a red flag. Never met a good Lauren. 😆
This is so much redundant overthinking. Just be unapologetically you and stop overthinking it. It also amazes me how DW gives a free pass to women to perform these nonsensical arbitrary "tests" saying she doesn't know she's doing it, but she has every right to. And then you're an idiot of you don't know what's going on.
Here's the real solution: just be you. Be normal. Be human. Don't complicate it. Don't feed into her games. Her tests over Chinese food or Mexican aren't necessary. Your evaluation of her character is what's necessary.
You say women want a man who makes respecting him easy. But the problem is you ask 10 different women what they find respectable and they'll all give you 1000 different answers. And it changes daily. If you don't live up to a woman's arbitrary subjective expectations, they will disrespect you. And you will be blamed by Doug Wilson for her lack of respect. No matter how well you're fulfilling your role.
I know what you are saying. Respect comes with being a wife, even if she does not find her husband lives up to expectations. Showing respect and practicing obedience is simply part of the job of a wife. It does not hinge on the subjective end of things. It hinges on whether she has said "I do."
Speaking truth to power, the Women-Industrial Complex (WIC)
What would I do without a false prophet to tell me what I want? Enjoy the 🔥🔥🔥
Bro, if you pull up to Chinese and she wants Mexican… GO GET THEM TACOS!!! 🌮
If you earlier made reservations, to which she agreed, then no. If you do, you're whipped, and a weak man whom she doesn't respect
@@horrificpleasantry9474 lol. Or you just agree that tacos are always a better decision than Chinese and you know that you can choose to flaunt your authority and firm resolve at later time if you wish.
Husbands, love your wives as Christ loves his church and gave himself up for her. You can at least give up your pride, you tiny weak man, and just go get the tacos.
@@JohnnyStuttle you're not listening, and that is NOT a sound application of that verse. You think Jesus dying on the cross was an inconvenience because he could've just said "fine, I'll let you worship tacos" ??
@@horrificpleasantry9474 oh I’m listening, whipped boy. Tell us how it is. Baaahahaha!
@@JohnnyStuttle .... You DO realize that calling someone something which pertains to you is nonsensical and embarrassing... don't you?
Tldr: act like a jerk...... but don't be one.
🎯🤯
Getting tired of this topic, really. Been married for over a decade now, and I can tell you that God, through Paul's letter to the Ephesians, puts it as succint as it can possibly be stated: "Husbands, love your wives...Wives, respect your husbands." All this "how to be a man" stuff and "what women want" stuff is overly complex and ultimately oppressive. Men, assuming you're not a brute on the one hand or a wallflower on the other, if a woman you're courting does not respect you, then leave her for another woman who does or no woman at all. Simple as that. You don't have to endure "tests" or other machinations of her mind. You are not a car to be taken for a spin. Either she will reciprocate your love with love and respect or she can get lost. My wife has never made me feel less than a winner, even in spite of my faults and weaknesses, and I continue to GROW in maturity because of it. She has a similar story - all this with community, patience, and prayer...no freaking "tests."
If you leave as soon as they show they're not up to par on a particular standard (say respect) when they're not yet your wife, then how have you left room to grow?
@@skylershuman7705 Respecting a loved one, friend...anyone...is "Human Relations 101." For an adult who fails this, abandoning the relationship may be the most expedient means of personal development for such an individual; even if not, there are billions of other choices. Moreover, a person who thinks himself/herself worthy of explicitly testing another is a narcissist.
@@robjvmedia260 Interesting and helpful clarification. I was confused a bit about your usage of growing but leaving. Thanks for that.
I've seen the tests Douglas is talking about, and I do sometimes feel like they are necessary from a certain perspective. If you're not tested by outside forces, then people will want to test you themselves.
This has to be a joke ? Right ?
Why