"I'm not an Alpha, I'm a Sigma" | Lord of Patriarchy

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  • Опубликовано: 4 окт 2024
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    #Politics #Debate #Twitch

Комментарии • 145

  • @sigmascrub
    @sigmascrub Год назад +58

    I like how, according to Dave, it's either that Jake has a job or Sarah has an OF. Sarah having a job is just not possible. Because woman.

    • @smithblack5945
      @smithblack5945 Год назад +11

      Sarah does actually have an OF, but it's probably not making as much as Dave fantasizes it is.

    • @ActualJake
      @ActualJake  Год назад +27

      Can confirm, my OF is supplemental income, most of what I make is from this channel - Sarah

    • @SYMPATRIC
      @SYMPATRIC 3 месяца назад +2

      @@ActualJake Yo. Im hear 1 year later, and its as if nothing meant anything. Everything is bullshit.

  • @NerdyGuyRanting
    @NerdyGuyRanting Год назад +80

    "I am a Sigma male. I have all the traits of an alpha but I don't have their flaw of needing to be loved."
    Dave is the older version of that kid on the playground when you tried to play pretend who would say things like "I have the powers of all the superheroes and non of their weaknesses."

    • @elfbreath
      @elfbreath Год назад +9

      "NO, you DON'T do that cool thing you say you do, because I do something even COOLER that stops you! I win. Why? Because I said so!!!"

    • @n0etic_f0x
      @n0etic_f0x Год назад +9

      He does not even get the meme. It is not _needing to be_ loved. You likely are loved by at least someone, you get that person and like a few others and stop caring. For instance, a Sigma (while not a real thing) would likely not have a RUclips channel.

    • @FrozEnbyWolf150
      @FrozEnbyWolf150 Год назад +3

      Also, according to their own typology, a sigma doesn't fly off the handle at the slightest provocation, and certainly does not make up things over which to get angry and start screaming.

    • @elfbreath
      @elfbreath Год назад +5

      @@FrozEnbyWolf150 So you're saying Dave got something wrong, is pretending his (misremembered) subjective opinion is objective fact, and is gonna scream about it and make it everyone else's problem? Doesn't sound like him /s

    • @NerdyGuyRanting
      @NerdyGuyRanting Год назад +4

      @@FrozEnbyWolf150 Also very true. It's been a while since I was in to neckbeard astrology. But from what I remember, what separates an alpha from a sigma isn't the need to be loved. It's about not caring about the opinion about other people at all. An alpha needs to prove themselves, but sigmas don't.
      Getting angry at something someone else says is caring about their opinion.
      Dave seems to care a lot what other people think.

  • @Zolet_lionheart
    @Zolet_lionheart Год назад +49

    Dave complaining about serah not wanting sauce on the pizza makes me believe that dave only cooks to his own preference instead of taking others prefernces into mind.

    • @sigmascrub
      @sigmascrub Год назад +10

      That's assuming he has other people to cook for

    • @Zolet_lionheart
      @Zolet_lionheart Год назад +7

      @@penguineconomics1353 considering he sits their constantly thinking about Jake and Sarah all day and generally coping instead of self reflecting it makes sense why people wouldn't ant to be a round him

    • @Zolet_lionheart
      @Zolet_lionheart Год назад +6

      @@sigmascrub probably not he doesn't seem pleasant to be around

  • @chibbersthesquirrel6189
    @chibbersthesquirrel6189 Год назад +38

    I can't believe Dave is a real person, he's like a caricature

  • @Kropothead
    @Kropothead Год назад +42

    Dave, I don’t know how to tell you this, but “I don’t care if I’m loved” is the world’s most obvious cope. Love is awesome, bud. You’re just scared to put yourself out there, so you reject others before they get the chance to reject you.
    I used to do it too, it was really miserable and I wasn’t fooling anybody. Not too late for that redemption arc, though, if you put the work in and stop being… this.

    • @soulman1988
      @soulman1988 Год назад +5

      I do this, but I try not to be a shitty human being like Dave.

    • @Kropothead
      @Kropothead Год назад +4

      ⁠@@soulman1988I get it, man. It’s not an unreasonable fear to have, you’re definitely going to get hurt looking for love. I’m just saying it’s worth it, and self-isolation can be pretty terrible for you too. But as long as you’re not taking it out on the ones around you like Dave does, it’s not wrong to do either. I’m a pretty closed book until I get my loved ones around, but I’ve been working on opening up and found it’s mostly been good for me.

    • @soulman1988
      @soulman1988 Год назад +6

      @@Kropothead I'm a single child and it's just how I've had to live life. My mom raised me as a single woman so when she couldn't be around I had to take care of myself. It's a lot easier to be on your own and from what I've seen from other humans, a lot nicer.

    • @eideticex
      @eideticex Год назад +1

      He might just be aromantic. Aromantic people experience little to no romantic attraction to others. I doubt Dave would entertain the conversation enough to figure out where he fits on that spectrum but if he ever did, it would probably help him get over a good chunk of that anger he displays.

    • @patchwurk6652
      @patchwurk6652 Год назад +8

      @@eideticex No one whose aromantic screams at the top of their lungs in a voice bordering on desperate "I DON'T CARE IF IM LOVED!" only to continuously bitch and whine about how unloved they are as a RUclips channel.

  • @BradKarmour
    @BradKarmour Год назад +26

    As a non-foodie, the fact that their rivalry has gone from politics to cooking is so funny. It's so low-stakes, I half expect them to move onto calligraphy or book organizing next.

    • @Hoykaman1
      @Hoykaman1 Год назад +3

      ha "low-stakes" i see what you did there

    • @josh-oo
      @josh-oo Год назад +5

      I can assure you, there are no higher stakes than cooking.

    • @Velvetx4cove
      @Velvetx4cove Год назад +7

      ​@@josh-oo Especially when Dave has no sense of personal hygiene or food safety whatsoever.

  • @tanithetiger
    @tanithetiger Год назад +17

    I can't believe I really just googled "boiling distilled water" just to see where Dave was even GETTING that idea 😭 apparently it is easier for distilled water to get to the superheated stage because of the lack of impurities but like. That doesn't mean it WILL blow up if it's boiled.

    • @Gentleman_Viking
      @Gentleman_Viking Год назад +1

      If you microwave water in a round container, it will become superheated then flash-boil when you put anything in it, but that's pretty far different from what Dave was describing.

    • @tanithetiger
      @tanithetiger Год назад +3

      @@Gentleman_Viking yeah I'm not saying he's remotely close to being right. Just that that's where he's getting the unhinged idea from

  • @orinjayce
    @orinjayce Год назад +13

    With my limited cooking equipment, in my tiny Korean apartment, I could outcook Dave with a toaster oven and frying pan. I don't even follow recipes for the most part.

  • @JovanDacic
    @JovanDacic Год назад +18

    Looking forward to Dave's impotent rage at the steak video. That should be perfection.

  • @samueleborn9909
    @samueleborn9909 Год назад +9

    "that's a lime juicer" 💀

  • @seraphonica
    @seraphonica Год назад +14

    it's valid for Dave to not want to be loved. the problem comes when he optimizes for it like some kind of d&d munchkin

    • @pinksock3963
      @pinksock3963 Год назад +2

      The fucking sound that came out of me

  • @TheDigitalWatcher
    @TheDigitalWatcher Год назад +9

    "Pizza has to remain horizontal when you pick it up."
    Chef Ramsey over here eating burnt pizza.

  • @FrozEnbyWolf150
    @FrozEnbyWolf150 Год назад +9

    I identify as a phi male, because I'm agender, and phi resembles the mathematical symbol for the null set.

  • @namelesscompadre4095
    @namelesscompadre4095 Год назад +7

    Dave truly is the DSP of this small section of the internet

    • @djobrien23
      @djobrien23 Год назад +2

      The world needs a cook-off between those two. Fastest to pour bacon grease down the toilet wins

  • @redolentthought7085
    @redolentthought7085 Год назад +9

    Dave, with his Sigma self-explanation, has created a Sigma Ouroborous and I look forward to this sad sad Ragnarok

  • @flunkiebubs2002
    @flunkiebubs2002 Год назад +4

    Does he think distilled water is alcahol?

  • @suburban-vampire
    @suburban-vampire Год назад +6

    holy fucking shit, when Dave starts singing in baby talk to Sarah... I can't even... THE CRINGE! IT BURNS!

  • @MrEboxez
    @MrEboxez Год назад +21

    Does Dave actually have anyone in his life? Like parents or siblings? Is it Sigma to be physically and socially repulsive to everyone in the world including your own blood?

    • @elfbreath
      @elfbreath Год назад +12

      From what I've gathered he has a brother, a sister, a niece, and a single mom. And he's proud of the fact that his mom and sister are ashamed of him.

    • @soulman1988
      @soulman1988 Год назад +8

      @@elfbreath Ouch.

    • @disturbedrocks1996
      @disturbedrocks1996 Год назад

      @@elfbreathto be fair, his sister and mom might be cunts

    • @noritochip_97
      @noritochip_97 Год назад +2

      @@disturbedrocks1996 So, you'd rather assume his family members (coincidentally the female ones) are the assholes, not Dave? Have you seen Dave's behavior? Everyone should be repulsed by that (because he basically needs it to be a sigma right).

    • @disturbedrocks1996
      @disturbedrocks1996 Год назад

      @@noritochip_97 i apologize, i was only tangentially aware of Dave when i made this comment, i thought he was just a lonely guy whose family might be dicks or just not worth a fuck kinda like mine! Then i ventured further down the Lord of Cringe rabbit hole and yeah I agree Dave is physically, morally and emotionally repugnant. I’m sure his mom and sister are ok people

  • @RecRoomPlays
    @RecRoomPlays Год назад +5

    Dave huffs the copium like his life depends on it.

  • @Nobody_Fn_Important
    @Nobody_Fn_Important Год назад +5

    the fact that Dave does not adapt or can get accustomed to change or even thinks of being creative in the kitchen makes me think he buys his shirts in bulk since he doesn't want to take chances the manufacturer will go bankrupt or the store will stop selling them. Change can be fun, Change can be interesting, and it can lead you to new flavours that you might like

  • @Mike-zx6sl
    @Mike-zx6sl Год назад +2

    You could do a Livestream of going to the store, buying a jug of distilled water, boiling it and adding pasta to demonstrate it doesn't explode and Dave would just insist it was mislabeled

  • @ZERO_O7X
    @ZERO_O7X Год назад +9

    I'm a proud Ligma male. 😂

    • @Kropothead
      @Kropothead Год назад +5

      I identify as a Gamma male, like Bruce Banner. I wander the Southwest in giant purple pants, seeking peace and solitude.

  • @avenger1340
    @avenger1340 Год назад +7

    If you told Dave that a strawberry was red, would he scream that it's purple?

  • @animatorstanley
    @animatorstanley Год назад +8

    I grill potatoes and other root vegetables all the time. ❤

  • @jazzanarchy1342
    @jazzanarchy1342 Год назад +4

    “I am SIGMA!” - no sigma ever

    • @dontuserachelslurs
      @dontuserachelslurs Год назад +4

      Sigma males are just people who call themselves that. It doesn't really mean anything else though.
      So actually every sigma ever says that. It's like the only requirement.

    • @jazzanarchy
      @jazzanarchy Год назад

      ​@@dontuserachelslurs This is true. I stand corrected.

  • @caseymckenna7111
    @caseymckenna7111 Год назад +4

    Can we get “pizza cheese, pizza cheese” as like a.. sub.. sound effect? I dunno, I don’t do Twitch so I don’t know the lingo but that cannot be lost to time.

  • @ms.aelanwyr.ilaicos
    @ms.aelanwyr.ilaicos 3 месяца назад +2

    What the heck is even happening in this video?
    Why does he think a streamer can't afford to make a pizza?

  • @jessicajohnson4992
    @jessicajohnson4992 Год назад +4

    I love how Dave is your brett Keane lol

  • @rodneysmith873
    @rodneysmith873 Год назад +8

    You guys are getting closer and closer to like actually being friend it's straight up verging on wholesome

  • @generalsci3831
    @generalsci3831 Год назад +6

    Does Dave just pause and emote every thirty seconds at random stuff?

  • @posthumanistpotato
    @posthumanistpotato Год назад +2

    "Show me up. Beat me." I think he has a humiliation kink...

  • @themannaking
    @themannaking Год назад +16

    It's really weird how Dave thinks Sarah is in "control" of the relationship when I'm pretty sure they do things pretty equally aside from Sarah being a rediculous sub.

    • @Kropothead
      @Kropothead Год назад +6

      Dave doesn’t have any practical experience with relationships, it’s all incel theorycrafting.

    • @MetalxLicaxPP
      @MetalxLicaxPP Год назад +2

      Sarah is a rediculous sandwich? 🤔🤔

    • @themannaking
      @themannaking Год назад +2

      @@MetalxLicaxPP it tru tho

    • @FrozEnbyWolf150
      @FrozEnbyWolf150 Год назад +2

      Something, something, used to privilege, equality feels like oppression.

    • @patchwurk6652
      @patchwurk6652 Год назад +1

      @@FrozEnbyWolf150 The fuck privilege is this gremlin even used to?
      I will eat my sweaty shoe if he's even been laid before.

  • @HootsMcPoot
    @HootsMcPoot 5 месяцев назад +1

    Watching Dave talk about food is like watching Vaush talk about fashion - unbelievably confident while being utterly clueless

  • @devildavacado6427
    @devildavacado6427 Год назад +4

    Dave is trying really hard to copy Jakes style, and it's almost kind of sweet. I think he likes you, Jake.

  • @animalxINSTINCT89
    @animalxINSTINCT89 Год назад +2

    There are no words to describe how badly I want an Iron Chef matchup between Jake and Dave to happen

  • @Elysium_the_Bard
    @Elysium_the_Bard Год назад +4

    1:51 Okay...why does this give me Caligula vibes?
    At any moment, I'm expecting him to ramble on about how he has existed from the morning of the world and how he shall exist until the last star falls from the night, that although he has taken on the form of "Dave", he is all men as he is no man and therefore is a god.
    Just...ya know...minus the charisma brought in by Malcom McDowell and turn up the entitlement that is from Caligula.

  • @CD-zd6zr
    @CD-zd6zr Год назад +2

    Good pizza...famous for never being folded or yellow/orange

  • @SilverDragonJay
    @SilverDragonJay Год назад +3

    dave is the epitome (pronounced epi tome) of the "well, acktually" redditer, except unlike the redditer who is _usually_ correct (if only pedantically), dave is just wrong. About most things.
    Also what's with this "don't put hot things on electric stoves thing"? I grew up with an electric stove, put hot shit up on there all the time and nothing happened. Get a good stove topped with borosilicate glass. Literally, the only crack or chip that ever formed on that thing (before it was replaced with another one due to catching the olds) was caused by dropping something heavy on it. idr if it was a pan filled with food or a knife or something. And the resulting chip was so minor we just kept using it anyway. These people who have this hard on for gas ranges...I don't think they've ever used an electric stove more then once or twice, they're fine. There's nothing wrong with them.

  • @SLAUGHTERAMA
    @SLAUGHTERAMA Год назад +2

    I'm actually learning a lot from Jake's cooking vids. I'm so used to pizza taking thirty minutes or so in a conventional oven, and I need to know how a pizza can be cooked in three minutes.
    Key distinction between me and Dave - I'm curious and genuinely open to learning new culinary techniques to improve my own game as opposed to being a smug fuckwit.

  • @ChrisBear1989
    @ChrisBear1989 7 месяцев назад

    "I don't care to be loved"
    BRO what. Love is awesome, platonic and otherwise.

  • @stroopeproductions9769
    @stroopeproductions9769 Год назад +2

    31:49 best part

  • @chunkymonkey435
    @chunkymonkey435 7 месяцев назад +1

    We need to send Dave's cooking videos to Gordon Ramsay

  • @soulman1988
    @soulman1988 Год назад +7

    I've worked in the restaurant industry since I was 14 and I absolutely love watching Jake take this chud down when it comes to food.

    • @jurassicsmackdown6359
      @jurassicsmackdown6359 9 месяцев назад

      You and me both! Been in the pink collar business since i was 18

  • @natrixxvision6997
    @natrixxvision6997 Год назад +1

    9:08 peeling the lemon zest with either a peeler or a paring knife is how limoncello is made.

  • @JayBrekken
    @JayBrekken 5 месяцев назад

    My personal favorite cheese blend for pizza is 2 parts Monterey Jack to 1 part fontina. Then, and this is optional, get some fresh mozz and pinch it into pieces about the size of a d6 and evenly distribute.

  • @vidhead85
    @vidhead85 Год назад +1

    This man us horrible! Those brats aren't evenly cooked and look like he was impatient when starting the fire

  • @MattTheLast
    @MattTheLast Год назад +1

    You WANT the low moisture stuff for a pizza. At least if you're going for full to heavy coverage. How does he not know this?

  • @Sophia-vk5bq
    @Sophia-vk5bq 3 месяца назад

    Semolina flour is such a great idea for pizza too cause it’s got high protein content and gives you a solid base for your toppings and sauce.

  • @Draylock1287
    @Draylock1287 7 месяцев назад

    As someone who also loves to cook. Watching the king of goop give anyone pointers is hilarious.

  • @xiggles
    @xiggles Год назад +1

    I use Not Another Cooking Show's lemonade recipe where he peels the rind and heats it with the water and sugar to make a lemon zest simple syrup

  • @deluxe_capacitor
    @deluxe_capacitor 7 месяцев назад +1

    Holy shit Dave is still this embarrassing when it comes to food? Hearing him cry about what type of mozzarella you use while being factually wrong is just... nuclear cringe, dude

  • @JohnSmith-pu8fm
    @JohnSmith-pu8fm Год назад +1

    Old school atheist vs nu male atheist

  • @seraphonica
    @seraphonica Год назад +2

    re: wasting six pounds of mozzarella, my solution was making a nacho with mozz substitution- a bit of a different flavor, but still melts amazingly for ooey gooey nachos

    • @jurassicsmackdown6359
      @jurassicsmackdown6359 9 месяцев назад +1

      Italian-themed nachos! Use tiny-cubed pepperoni
      It's like how there's those Mexican omelettes. Diced peppers, shredded cheddar, crumbled ground beef, onions all inside. Then some queso and a dollop of sour cream on top, side of salsa

  • @harrison_williams
    @harrison_williams Год назад

    LOVE LOVE LOVE the Dave coverage!

  • @Djanck000
    @Djanck000 Год назад +1

    Every time i hear these videos without watching, i remember Dave started as an Amazing Atheist knock-off.

  • @Andysavage24
    @Andysavage24 Год назад +1

    Imagine having to deal with Paul all day.

  • @0_0-nerd
    @0_0-nerd Год назад +3

    Jake I’m little disappointed. I think low moisture whole milk mozzarella is the best.

  • @noritochip_97
    @noritochip_97 Год назад

    Dave REALLY wants a cookoff. He's so lonely, he's willing to have an (I'm assuming in person) cookoff with someone he despises.

  • @zwartdude
    @zwartdude Год назад +1

    I'm sorry Dave but as a citizen of the CT and connoisseur of the 2 best types of pizza new haven and New York pizza the only way your pizza should stay perpendicular is if you fold if down the center like a gentleman. If lifted flat is should droop so far you are worried the cheese will slide off!

  • @seansteele6532
    @seansteele6532 Год назад +1

    Oh man is Dave multiclassing?

  • @Buddhabebop
    @Buddhabebop 10 месяцев назад

    lord of the mirthless more like

  • @jaredandrews5806
    @jaredandrews5806 5 месяцев назад

    Like any decent person, i dont believe in any of the alpha/sigma/toga male bs, but anyone who uses the phrase 'my pizza-making journey' cannot claim to not be soy imo

  • @MelvinWillikers
    @MelvinWillikers Год назад

    Ham and cheese sandwich from scratch, except for the ham and cheese. SIGMAH.

  • @darken2185
    @darken2185 Год назад +1

    I cooka da pizza

  • @TackeMatty
    @TackeMatty Год назад

    BICYCLES

  • @brianbunker5057
    @brianbunker5057 Год назад

    He just can't help but nit pick everything you do jake.

  • @wurst1284
    @wurst1284 Год назад

    what a badass

  • @theirishviking
    @theirishviking Год назад

    What is with the beard he has?

  • @Cycstorm
    @Cycstorm Год назад +1

    This is the best fued on the Internet.

  • @unreasonablyagreeable1081
    @unreasonablyagreeable1081 Год назад +1

    sigma male dave.. HHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA