Top Secret Password Creations Service | ASMR
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- Опубликовано: 13 окт 2024
- In need of a password, you stop into a local business called Top Secret Password Creations, where they create the best, most unique, custom passwords that money can buy!
Patreon ► bit.ly/1EZgmNi
Listen to selected works outside of RUclips:
Spotify ► bit.ly/1V23U60
CDBaby ► bit.ly/1AUt3Jj
iTunes ► apple.co/1xIHLNd
Podcasts:
EphemRadio (on hiatus) ► apple.co/2afSkZQ
Arkham Sanitarium (on hiatus) ►apple.co/2alraeV
Social Media:
Facebook ► / ephemeralrift1
Twitter ► / ephemeralrift
IG ► / e.rift
What is ASMR?
ASMR stands for Autonomous Sensory Meridian Response. It's a non-scientific word that an everyday person came up with to describe the feeling characterized as a pleasurable tingling sensation felt in the head, scalp, back and other regions of the body in response to visual, auditory, tactile, olfactory, and/or cognitive stimuli, such as crinkling bags, hand movements, whispering, personal attention or watching someone perform a task. It's like goosebumps but much more pleasant and without the uncomfortable chills.
ASMR videos are meant to intentionally induce this sensation in the viewer, often referred to as "tingles", but the videos also serve to provide a relaxing, calming and soothing experience for the viewer. Many people who do not experience ASMR still enjoy the videos for their calming and sleepy effect.
i CANNOT believe how rude i am being. all of your passwords were excellent, here’s a $50 tip
*I*
Only $50...cheapskate
@@inoscopedjfk9301 Exactly, it could have been 300
604.31
And I cannot fucking believe you didn't fix your comment already. *I
I like how much lore there is surrounding the goddamn space bar. It's hysterical.
Maxim Tomato wait if there’s no space bars how’d they make the spaces on the posters????
Toothpick in the hole thingy ez
@@kadenrichards1196 there is, theres "ONCE A", "ASK ME" and "ABOUT OUR"
667 likes. Be happy I saved you from internet satan
@@hiya022 How dare you.
Can we get a sequel of the hacker actually figuring out the password 😂
Iwouldlovethatvideolol
Very noice
I NEED IT!
They are guaranteed to work though...
@@dizzychineseman7445hegotyourspacebartoohuh?
The client is really smart because by saying that they don't like the passwords,they are getting multiple passwords for the price of one. Just think about it. He's creating all these passwords and the client could just write all of those on a piece of paper and get multiple passwords for the price of one. Genius.
Nah if you don't pay for them you can't use them. Duh.
You don't understand stand that I could create a password that only my father or brother would know and they are very smart people btw FUCK LIBERALS
@@Samson12 I see you like PragerU. I also like propaganda
ha gotem
PragerU rhymes with Nazi Propagandu
What a coincidence
Rift: The next key will be uppercase 'Y'
Me: Why?
Rift: Yes.
Rovix lol
Gosh that made me laugh too hard 😂
I didn't get it at first 😂
Timestamp please
Is it because Y means yes?
you can tell he’s getting gradually more pissed off after each password
Gow fucking far did you watch it
vi ce 😂
vi ce i mean after like 15 minutes hes pretty clearly getting pissed
I like how he tries to guilt you into accepting his password by telling you about how he has to miss his lunch, and really accentuating how much he was looking forward to that pastrami and mustard sandwich. Even going so far as to tell you the entire story of how he decided to take a pastrami sandwich, truly trying his hardest to make you feel bad for rejecting all his passwords.
Paul really is amazing.
@@Samstar369 that moment when you learn the meaning of lawn from when a guy in a beaches shirt offers you some lawn
Ephemeral Rift: “I’ll throw in an ampersand to throw off the hacker. You know what? I’ll put another one in there.”
The Hackers: *Visible confusion*
I think this dude is cool and all but you offering me fresh grass?! What an offer! I thought you’d never ask!!!
We're you also interested in that pot plant up the back?
@@Samstar369 well crap. You just blew my mind. I thought it was just ER memeing or something. I didn't realize it had a deeper satirical meaning
*_O H Y E A H_*
Joe Carpentier there is always a deeper satirical meaning
Never turn down free grass.
As a hacker, I can confirm I don't kno of the existence of the letter 'double u'. Never seen it before!
uuhat are you talking about? uuhat on earth is a "dub ore you"?
I, too, do not knoe of an existence of a dough or you.
is a 'duhba u' a sentence in a foreign language?
@@ooo629ooo Legends say it looks like this: \/\/
Crazy times, huh?
what the frick is a hubbleroot
$4,009 for a password, seems like the best price out there. Honestly it does.
Funsyze (the joke)
Your head
Funsyze wooooooshhhh
*A N D O N L Y 6 2 C E N T S*
What did he post originally anyone remember?
(maybe i should say that this comment is satire)
I feel bad watching this because I feel like I'm pissing him off by saying no to his passwords and he's really just trying his best
5 months late buuut.
Lord adorable, you say no to alot of people why stop now?
Bruh irl I legit can rarely say no just cause I feel really bad or anxious about it 😅
@@joshuamaynard7180 Saaame
@@joshuamaynard7180 i feel you
@@joshuamaynard7180 not the only one my dude
Pick a number between 1 and 0.
...4
Haha I guess on a keyboard 4 is between 1 and 0.
Well done.
98765432
@@vix8482 goodguesssoclose
@@dizzychineseman7445 aww what was it
@@vix8482 it was 987654321
@@dizzychineseman7445 darnwhatasadday
how many passwords are you looking for today?
me:65
ER: just one? ok
69*
buffon despues de una manaos nice
buffon despues de una manaos nice
buffon despues de una manaos nice
@@buffondespuesdeunamanaos3705 Nic3
“You’re a tough customer”
Well yeah, I’m spending 4k for a password that I could come up with by sliding my head across my keyboard, I’m gonna waste your time
intamacies
A8aks-%iaisi&:el
Oh, you’re right. Lmao
i dad 4:6 < that’s mine
I did that exact same thing and it turned out like this: A**S*1TF\/cker.
Wtf keyboard
intamacies ya mean asdfghjkl?
kjhngtfd;.l,m seems right to me, definitely won't get hacked lol
“Change your biweekly password every quarter!”
“Change your quarterly password every 6 months!”
“Change your monthly password every 2 weeks!”
*_I’m not sure what to do with this conflicting information._*
Hi Ness :) 👋
Easy, every week change the passwords you use the most, the biweekly password, every quarter.
Change the password you use to get your biweekly password every six months.
Change your monthly password you use every month which you use to access the biweekly password every two weeks.
We recommend protecting your monthly password information with your biweekly password.
Ness mains are toxic
my brain is dies
😂😂😂😂
Finaly ASMR with keyboard without a person slamming it super fast and loud.
This is some good gourmet shit right here
Yes indeed
Definitely. Fast typing is too aggressive for ASMR. I want it to be like they've never seen a keyboard before.
Watched horrifically while he told 700k ppl my password
I may be 9 months late but this comment has me cry-laughing in my room at midnight
ill be taking your account then
Rover the Cat did you get it?
Mythoclast update me when his account’s in the DUMPSTER k?
I hacked your account lol
Rift should do an ASMR Space bar thief video where he shows us the different bars in his collection with their backstories. In actuality he could just be showing us the same one over and over again
Hayley - apparently that was already referencing another video of his.
Hayley - “Ethan’s keys to good sleep” was apparently the video this was referencing.
I love the complimentary fresh cut lawn 🙌🏻
what does it mean?
囸囲囚 the point of this video is mocking capitalism. The salesman is obviously marking up prices on absolute bullshit, in a business that is completely ridiculous. He is implying you’re a sheep for falling for this racket, and offers you some “fresh cut lawn” because sheep graze in fields, eating grass.
That's a lot to read into an ASMR video.
Wilhelm Beck thanks m8
Wilhelm Beck thx man
Would be interesting to actually use one of these passwords, and the hint for your password is just a timestamp for when the password starts in the video. Without context it would mean nothing to anyone but you.
lol thats an awesome idea.
That is really good
Until you just now revealed it lol
ER PCV 31:44
You could just use this theory for other videos.
I prefer to smash my forehead into my keyboard to make my passwords.
The good ol' fashioned way!
Mission Complete:
Respect+
Mission Successfully Failed
*100*
@@picklesoncucumber4614 Mission Successfully Failed
*100*
Nice but everyone knows the best way is to take random letters from people you killed that month
Man’s dropping videos like Eminem in the 90s. Praise be, Lord Rift. He who tingled for our sins. Stay blessed.
Ralph Wiggum Uncle Bless
Blessings upon him!
I see you everywhere papa Ralph
Stay blessed, Adrian.
The breah of my cat smells like cat food
I like how he tries to guilt you into accepting his password by telling you about how he has to miss his lunch, and really accentuating how much he was looking forward to that pastrami and mustard sandwich. Even going so far as to tell you the entire story of how he decided to take a pastrami sandwich, truly trying his hardest to make you feel bad for rejecting all his passwords.
Paul really is amazing at creating characters.
These ideas, that come into your head, are so unique and creative. You inspire me
these ideas,
that come into your head,
Are so unique and creative.
You inspire me (no punctuation of any kind here though)
if you read it like that you’ll think the commas are unnecessary as well.
@@mnase9259 screw off m8
Relief asmr love ur vids
the prices on the bulletin board are like EA's dlc prices
Mega oof
UI oof
true
Lmao
not even close. EA is at least 10 times more expensive
Imagine him going through all those passwords and you just say " i think I'll go with the first one"😂
Space bars huh? im more of a caps lock collector myself.
RagingDragonBlues nah all about the delete keys
SOYIUTOOARETHRESDKNKCANINKYTYOELIKEFHISGOTTKBFINDTHAYTHIRSGUY
no but seriously this is the result of me trying to type on my phone like normally stupid pudgy fingers
At least you're not being a menace to people with that one.
?something call backor call backcallba a joke spacebar his Was
Ffs
I was listening to this for 4 minutes, *falls asleep*, and wakes up to you saying "good now!" And i start thinking "what is this sorcery??
Ephemeral: Tell me a number between 1 and 0
Me, an intellectual: 0.254
Ephemeral: 4
Las patatas sonrientes it is between 1 and 0 what are you a Chernobyl scientist stupid, omg
tvFilthyFrank3 bruh what
Chernobyl scientist damnnnnnn
@@TheDude420.69 r/woooosh
@@TheDude420.69 nah if you do the *intellectual way of math,* you'll find that 0.254 is between 1 and 4.
If I was rich I would Patreon $604.31 and $4009.62 consecutively as an expensive fan joke.
Fuck dat I'm over here livin on a box of breakfast
Liam Eaton breakfast box?
Boo cereal
I love imagining that all the cuts in the video are you cutting out the parts where you're just laughing your ass off at your own words.
CompanyPanda probably true
CompanyPanda actually, the nice thing about ER is he actually seems to care about his viewers. Think back to the last time you heard something way too loud in his videos... oh wait, NEVER! Think back to the last time you had an ad in the middle of a video, NEVER! One of these days he’s gonna scare everyone or upload the wrong thing though, that’ll be fun :)
I've been a fan of his for a long time. I know he's nice and I assumed it was probably that. That's why i thought it was funny to imagine that instead of the real reason (which is probably what you're saying), it's him laughing at his own jokes, like a typical funny dad or uncle.
@@CompanyPanda I mean he is a IRL dad and our Uncle E. :D
Password seller: A NUMBER NINE, A NUMBER SEVEN...
*Big Smoke has been summoned*
And I bet we all read that in Big Smokes voice 🤣🤣🤣
@@british021 Naturally!
Ayyyyy let's go
Ah shit here we go again
And a large soda
Remember: always change an S to a $ for a safe and secure pa$$word
Why not go beyonnd and just type in P4$$vV0rd instead?
Noo.... Why not ρÄ5şẄØŕĐ to be extra extra safe
God damn what kind of stuff are you guys hiding that you require such unimaginably secure passwords
The NSA. Hiding stuff from the NSA.
Hiding porn memberships from the NSA
Unsuspecting rift had no clue about my hidden camera and now I’ve leaked the password to the tin foil hat society hahaha
Matthew Campbell ...lol
Sounds like you're an enemy spy to me. Don't expect me to loosen my TFH around you.
HOW DARE YOU! :D he will get his revange >:D
The aluminum foil hat society has been compromised! Global anarchy will set in!
Matthew Campbell and now I wait for him to see this and make a video about it.
This guy is actually a doctor at ASMR. A lot of people are either cringe or really sexual with it but this guy is a doctor and knows da way.
And Latte is the nurse
$4000 for a PW change? Not bad. I have a business picking out wallpaper for blind people, we bring in something like $600,000 a month. Cost $20,000 for our service. Cheapest around
That is certainly interesting! I own a multimillion-dollar business that specifically produces binaural beats to deaf people. We bring in anything from $2,000,000 to $3,000,000 a year from binaural beats alone. Here is a quote from one of our most valued customer: "Holy shit. If you focus hard enough on the sounds - you can turn into Justin Bieber!"
@@numeric_limits4829 Not bad my friend, but my triple million dollar company is FAR superior, it is our goal to bring feet to those who don't have them, we use $1,000 on feet alone and get triple the value with our costumers spreading the news about our fine business to all their other feetles friends!
@@LifeRewind0119 I raise you ten folds, We sell souls to the soul less, we spend about 5$ per soul and bring in one million. And with how much eggey teens there are out there, we bring a lot of money in
@@a_ghost8926 I shall one up you there, I own a business that specializes in selling Discord DM's. We sell these at $800 per Direct Message and our service takes a week to perform. The reason we are so fast is because we use your premium funding to send an actual ninja to discord's office in the US to send a private message to any person you want! (Plane ticket price will be added to transaction, not included in base transaction.)
@@shiroyatagami4780 let me twice up u their, i own a multi billion dollar company we basically sell gallons of gas to people with no cars and ye their will be the one guy once in a while with no car or use for the gas but we also have a variety of chips in the back that we dont bother to restock well we do but like every year or 2
*”Hackers never think to use a w.”*
Why Would We believe What you are sayin’ (see I’m using W)
“gamers”
Haha, hackers will never think of using a ¥
SomeBlobDemon unless ya know they are 1/7th of the population because 1 out of seven people use it bro
¥uAlwAyZL¥!n will be my password.
Yeah,thatrobberhasbeenaproblemforalotofpeoplenationwide.
Nuclear Ancapist Whooosh
NuclearAncapistohmyfuckinggodareyouevenwatchingthevideo
/r/woosh
Is this woosh shit some kind of meme? I'm honestly not seeing the appeal.
Joseph Siri /r/whooosh is a subreddit dedicated to when a joke goes over someone’s head producing a whoosh sound hence the sub Reddit’s name
Me: gets ready for loud commercial
Commercial: McCormick cooking asmr
Me: *Thank you, RUclips!*
You should do a roleplay as the spacebar thief
YourMemeDealer D i need the finest memes you got and not the trending ones with a side of perfectly timed explosions
Yes he should do a rileplay
Kieran Englefield thanks for pointing out my mistake i hadnt noticed
I think his new vid as The Key Salesman fulfills this
The videos title and desription shouldn't have spaces in it
You should consider making an ASMR keyboard typing video. The sounds were so good in this video, especially because of how softly and delicately you typed. I absolutely loved it and it gave me so much tingles.
many*
@@Crunchiest oh no he made a grammar mistake that completely changed the comment
ER 26:00 : “I feel like this is gunna be it”
Barely half way through the video
I like the way he types with only his pointer fingers.
AwesomeDude799 The word you’re looking for is index
I type as fast and sometimes faster than a 10 finger typer despite me only using 2 fingers.
Shiro Yatagami weird flex but ok
JDM Games or as sam o’nella says,
Weird Flax, but ok.
@@Hermaeus_ I know the other name for them, who really cares.
I was trying to sleep and lost it at, “due to the fact that I have no car insurance”
Same here 😆
Most creative ASMRist hands down
PainedGore commence the jigglin
Idk I think he is toed for most creative with goodnight moon.
ASMRtist, you mean
Daniellea ha I was gonna say the same thing
I love how random these videos are. But I’d actually love some freshly cut lawn thank you!
Rift gets more uncomfortable each time you decline a password lol
Why do i feel like im getting scammed and still like it
im glad you where born
Make more videos
~were~
worm worm...I’m
Glad I wasn’t the one who had to do it ...salute 💂♀️😂
worm worm and I'm if we are being technical.
Love both your channels
"can i have your first name, please?"
". . . ."
"okay."
I was like "oh is that a car alarm at 26 minutes? How didnt he notice and pause filming? I guess it is really faint..." and it took me a solid 2 minutes to realise it was outside my own window 😂
I have a super-cool top-secret password.
ephemeralriftisthebestpasswordcreatorintheworldyoucannotrefutethat1
Oh wait...
No. No.
I always like to throw a random period in there somewhere to throw people off.
Oh boy.
I've seen you before...
No. I enjoy your channel, I unsubbed but I will to check back occassionally. Keep making good comments.
30:25
"Gimme a number between 1 and 0"
...
*Clicks*
...
"Four..."
i mean on a keyboard it is inbetween 1 and 0 lmaoo
1234567890
1. 0
4
4 is in between 1 & 0
kaden richards actually brilliant demonstration
In the beginning he just low key mentioned tht he hit a car and has to pay the person back for the damages. But I love your stuff rift. I’m being serious keep up the good vids
Can u please make more videos with typing noises? Possibly a library roleplay???
Felipe Lopez - I would so love this
Sanatarium Admin
Check out library roleplay by LLOYDS ASMR, he's done work with ER before. One of the OG asmartists
"So does that sound like a good deal?"
"Um u a scammer?"
"Ok great"
E.R:Would you like this dirt?
Me:Yes pls
E.R: well I'll put this aside
Me:Noooo......I want my dirt....
Memento Mori it's lawn, you imbecile
*E A T I T N O W*
I got jar of dirt
I got jar of dirt
And guess what inside it
So let's start off with an aMpERsaNd..
&
Is it really this symbol - - >&
&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&
Emiel Muter MERN?
One of my favourite of your videos Rift. I can't stop coming back to it every 3 months or so.... Super relaxing. 👍
I'm broke I'll just take the identity theft.
moviechic07 did you take the spacebars with the hidden cameras pointing at keyboards and screens?
Identity theft is not a joke, Jim. Millions of families suffer every year
JMBAD OMG I LOVE YOU
r/unexpectedoffice
Maybe you're lucky and they'll pay your bills.
Somehowhestolemyphonesspacebar
ButDidHeTakeYourShiftKey?
Tookmycapslockandspacebatandshift
{Spacebat}
@@michaellara4489 yes a bat in space
Both a baseball bat and the animal
"Change your password every month"
*literally have had the same password for 6+ years*
Oh hey, it me
@@Scorpionoxide oh hey its you
@@docmcstuffins6300 oh hey, it's him
@@0AngelOnTheDanceFloor0 oh hey, it’s hey
Oh hey you're finally awake
consumerism satire? the grass is a snack to the sheep hes selling passwords to
High IQ Play
You can't fool us
proceeds to use passwords
0:27
Me, having watched this video several times: no actually this is not my first time
the funniest part is that he actually looks like a sleezy buisnessman
SodaRings Business*
THE SHAQTUS you are of the highest society sir
Such Underrated Channel . Along with Dr T Your My Favorite . Keep up the great content
Nani Na +
Highly TECHNICAL
If you look up highly technical you'll get dr. T. If you look up rift you get him.
You're*
yro'ue*
24:00 beatles reference. he knew most listeners automatically respond to number 9 lol
Ooh small batch artisan passwords!
I'm sorry Rift I didn't know that was your space bar!
Unfortunately I sold all the space bars on E-Bay for $604.31!
Apologies sire
probably one of if not my favorite videos by rift. the tingliest by far
I'm sick, I got a cold (in my country we are in Winter...) I've been needing some rest and peace to recover... this video is just what I need! Thanks! I love the sound of your voice and the keyboard.
In what Country is it Winter now ? Im sweating my balls of...
Argentina, most precisely in Neuquen where I live.
Vilsa-Brunnen Medium The southern hemisphere has the opposite seasons from the northern hemisphere.
Miss Arthemis Warlova Lucky bastard. Buildings are literally melting over here in England
Josuke 10 celsius is cold as fuck
Patrolling the Mojave almost makes you wish for a nuclear winter.
Egg Benedict What is this!? I've seen this commented on videos all across the internet but I can't figure out what the hell it is! I can't find anything on it on Google or Know Your Meme...
Madison Mcneal Patrolling the Mojave almost makes you wish for a nuclear winter.
Madison Mcneal
Fallout New Vegas reference
PainedGore dammit why'd ya tell them
Shit, living in germany right now makes me wish for nuclear winter
I love that at the beginning he used the opportunity to basically show us how proud he was that he pulled out a piece of his lawn XD
Hmmmm.
Ya know, I think the reason all of these passwords just aren't working for me is because they don't include enough *_spaces._*
Sterlingsorrybutthatdamnspacebarthief
Love how the background poster says, emergency password service only 4,000.62 dollers. Great deal
☝🤓 $4009.62
ER: fresh grass?
Me: HELL YEAH!
ER: no?
Me: No
ER: sure?
Me: no I want it
ER: it’s here if you change your mind
Me: ......... WTF DUDE
(I love my fresh grass)
Just what I was like
I could see this being a legit business if you came up with passwords which had a good balance of being easy for someone to remember and secure.
Thespacebarburglarstrikesagain.
The clothes he chose are perfect for this character
A M P E R S A N D
i still dont know what an ampersand is
It’s this: &
16:08 hes getting ready to punch a hole in the wall
If you go through that part extremely carefully, he went through the five stages of grief. Very subtle, good job ER.
Here I am, almost 3 full years later. Still my favorite of Rift's videos.
Those r some very reasonable prices
*this passwords are more expensive everyday*
Wait! No! I totally wanted some fresh cut- aww maannn he put it away...
So how is my biweekly password being changed every quarter
How password making will be without net neutrality
Trippz you must be fun at parties
A J Oof
Trippz
Not reaching at all. Give it 50+ years
Trippz Those boots must taste real good.
Oof, too soon man.
Too soon.
Take a shot everytime he says "password"😆
More like everytime he says uppercase or lowercase.
I knew i would probs die from it so every time he said password it was half a shot.
I blacked out
Gavoko kells The alcohol will put you to sleep better than the ASMR will.
Quick fall a sleep
If i wanted to die peacefully, this would be it.
My password is SAMMICH!
*F U C K M A Y O*
*BAWBAQ*
$AMM1CH
"U mean sandvich cause sandvich is only sandvich" said heavy
Props to u man for not selling out and having ads in ur videos.
Lmao small increase due to the fact that I don’t have car insurance
Wow. Inflation really did its thing huh?
Yep
i feel like i need another *updated* version of this video. absolutely love it
Digging the shirt man
-Avid Collector of Hawaiian shirts
Him: What’s your STATE
Me: Ohio
Him:Types Two letters
Me: Falls asleep
OH
Jack Wolf IO
51, area 51
I love how unrelated the lawn is, he does it only to make you smile before you go to bed and that's just so wholesome honestly
Thank you Ephemeral Rift. This is the first time I’ve ever felt the ASMR sensation.
4k dollars for an emergency password service. You are a genious, Paul.
“Uppercase 8” got me dying