It's Benny's Birthday! | The U.K. Boils | T**** Hopes Bannon Will Defend Him To Jan 6th Committee

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  • Опубликовано: 15 ноя 2024

Комментарии • 2,3 тыс.

  • @scafgal7242
    @scafgal7242 2 года назад +82

    Stephen SOooo glad youre back! With neighbortly hugs - Canada

  • @batgurrl
    @batgurrl 2 года назад +165

    Stephen, your monologue is once again on fire and hilarious. Thanks for helping to keep us sane in these troubling times. Happy Birthday Benny. You are a good boy

    • @joepedo6595
      @joepedo6595 2 года назад +1

      Only part you got right was BOY! this 👢 👅 is about as funny as a garbage can full of dead puppies!! Just another looney left wing nut who thinks his opinion matters only people it matters to is his fellow looney left wing nuts

    • @Justusson
      @Justusson 2 года назад +1

      He’s the best of the best! Hope to go and watch a show live someday,..!!

  • @accuratealloys
    @accuratealloys 2 года назад +422

    After seeing Benny, and how much he loves him, I like Stephen even more.

  • @maryrhudy9250
    @maryrhudy9250 2 года назад +25

    HAPPY BIRTHDAY, BENNY!!!!! You take very good care of your pet humans.

  • @amm6569
    @amm6569 2 года назад +34

    As an Arizonan living in London - the high of 102° in London yesterday was only 4° cooler than the high of 106° in my hometown of Tucson, both at 2:30pm local times. Personally I loved the heat, but what people don't realize is that the UK doesn't have air conditioning - not in 90% of homes at least. Plus, it was humid.

    • @mr.logicpants2835
      @mr.logicpants2835 2 года назад +1

      That can be really bad. I have lived in Las Vegas NV for the last 23 years and spending any extended period of time in my garage in the summertime can be brutal. Nothing but hot dead air. I'm SOOOOOOO thankful for air conditioning. 😎

  • @dwoodman26
    @dwoodman26 2 года назад +31

    I can confirm it is ridiculously hot here in the UK; I have moved into the fridge. Although I'm having difficulty sleeping upright, I assume it's still bigger than an apartment in New York.

    • @jackkomisar458
      @jackkomisar458 2 года назад +6

      Before you move into the fridge, make sure there are no Tory politicians inside.

    • @alanai1981
      @alanai1981 2 года назад +2

      FACTS

  • @amandajohnson2823
    @amandajohnson2823 2 года назад +263

    I'm so glad you're back, Mr. Colbert.

    • @michaeldillon4431
      @michaeldillon4431 2 года назад +1

      O.M.G. YOURE JOKING ! 😂😂😂😂😂

    • @Carlton_Banda
      @Carlton_Banda 2 года назад +9

      Him and The Daily Show, absolutely amazing.

    • @GailColeman
      @GailColeman 2 года назад +4

      @@michaeldillon4431 troll

    • @haroldmoore1412
      @haroldmoore1412 2 года назад +1

      @@Carlton_Banda and A Closer Look with Seth Meyers.

    • @dancepiglover
      @dancepiglover 2 года назад

      In other words, a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down.

  • @luciamiller1555
    @luciamiller1555 2 года назад +67

    God Bless SC and your writers! Simply brilliant comedy and my nightly sanity these past 6 dark years.

  • @michellewall6748
    @michellewall6748 2 года назад +63

    Being a Brit..... I particularly liked this monologue!! Excellent! Stephen is just the best!! Always makes me laugh!🇬🇧🤣🤣🤣🤣

    • @aliens4143
      @aliens4143 2 года назад

      😂😂😆😆🤣🤣😝😝

  • @cirella1064
    @cirella1064 2 года назад +59

    Love his show. So funny and comforting despite the mess we are all in.

  • @missybarbour6885
    @missybarbour6885 2 года назад +90

    6:19 Missed a perfect opportunity to have the smell cop yell "Febreze! Put your hands up! Actually, don't."

    • @impunitythebagpuss
      @impunitythebagpuss 2 года назад +1

      Need a job? SC's crew could use you! Good one! Lol!

    • @AisuruMirai
      @AisuruMirai 2 года назад +3

      This is a much better joke than the one he used. Nicely done.

    • @beeonthyme5760
      @beeonthyme5760 2 года назад

      Clever very

  • @kevinsmith5318
    @kevinsmith5318 2 года назад +481

    Steven is my only reprieve/relief from the misery of the current world news.

    • @thecountofmontecristo8280
      @thecountofmontecristo8280 2 года назад +7

      No, you can walk away any time you feel like and I guarantee your life won't be any better or worse for it. Happy travels.

    • @worldcitizeng6507
      @worldcitizeng6507 2 года назад +2

      @@thecountofmontecristo8280 last September/October 2021, I didn't pay attention to world/us news for almost a month. Until I got to a hotel with BBC @Sharm ElSheik on the Sinai peninsular, Egypt. I stayed at hostels 😌in most cities. It's good to get out of daily routine once a year 😌

    • @mark-ish
      @mark-ish 2 года назад

      @@thecountofmontecristo8280 Kia Orana, I concur, although life is definitely better, from within the cook islands. 🏝🍹

    • @Marijuanifornia
      @Marijuanifornia 2 года назад

      Have you ever heard of "Marijuana?"
      Not many people know about this (and even fewer people care) but the legalization of "Marihuana" enabled the US to fight and win World War II and save all of our lives.
      Watch the 14-minute 1942 USDA video, *Hemp for Victory,* and then curse everyone in America who has lied to you about "Marijuana" for your entire life.

    • @DomBrownyo
      @DomBrownyo 2 года назад

      THE BOYS is anti america, anti superhepr and anti fascist. U might like it. Very funny. very adult.

  • @susanmcnamara8253
    @susanmcnamara8253 2 года назад +35

    Happy birthday, Benny!! You are a good boy!💜🐶🥳

  • @MaryJaneHancock
    @MaryJaneHancock 2 года назад +13

    I lost my pup to a heart attack in May 2022. Warms my heart to see your love for your pup. Enjoy. Pets are delightful souls. Thank you for sharing.

    • @cindymorose6673
      @cindymorose6673 2 года назад

      So sorry for your loss.

    • @SchoolforHackers
      @SchoolforHackers 2 года назад

      May your heart heal. I have no doubt you gave him or her the best life they could possibly have.

  • @tytn9978
    @tytn9978 2 года назад +9

    i've been missing Stephen Colbert the past few weeks; his "take" on current, and also not-so-current, events is unique and entertaining.

  • @bethwaring7951
    @bethwaring7951 2 года назад +301

    It’s nice to hear someone talking about the heatwave in the UK without mocking us about it “not being that hot” and actually addressing that we’re not set up for any weather extremes.

    • @htown11465
      @htown11465 2 года назад +20

      In fairness, you guys literally colonized other countries in hotter weather - and those countries weren’t set up for that weather either.

    • @benekross1777
      @benekross1777 2 года назад +14

      Thought the same thing. The northeast in the US is very similar, not alot of central air.

    • @blindmown
      @blindmown 2 года назад +52

      @@htown11465 "we" didn't do anything, our ancestors were colonizers just like yours were undoubtedly slavers and colonizers too (go back far enough and everyone's ancestors have done some messed up stuff).

    • @joshsmith2178
      @joshsmith2178 2 года назад +5

      @@htown11465 what?

    • @TheGreatAtario
      @TheGreatAtario 2 года назад +23

      Anything over 100°F is definitely "that hot". Myself, I'd even lower the bar to 90°F, especially for higher humidity areas.

  • @SquashBlossom62
    @SquashBlossom62 2 года назад +47

    LOLOL 😆 Stephen Colbert is a national treasure !!!🤣 😆 😂 I have a serious crush on him and his brain!🥰😂
    His writers know his personality and enable him to shine. I've got a fan crush 😍

    • @noname7271
      @noname7271 2 года назад +4

      It's best not to idolize your heroes. Remember that Stephen Colbert is just a human person, which is part of what makes him great. He's not pretending. He's a showman and he's upfront and honest about it.

    • @Omni0404
      @Omni0404 2 года назад +2

      I'll tell Desi Arnaz on you! Then you got some 'splaining to do.

    • @Woodbug-b7t
      @Woodbug-b7t 2 года назад

      Hey...form a queue, don't putsch.

    • @freya8133
      @freya8133 2 года назад +2

      Me too!

    • @steveng7174
      @steveng7174 2 года назад

      Our lazy embrace of Colbert is a testament to our own impoverished comic standards. We have come to accept coy mockery as genuine subversion and snarky mimesis as originality. It would be more accurate to describe our golden age of political comedy as the peak output of a lucrative corporate plantation whose chief export is a cheap and powerful opiate for progressive angst and rage.
      What Stewart and Colbert do most nights is convert civic villainy into disposable laughs. They prefer Horatian satire to Juvenalian, and thus treat the ills of modern media and politics as matters of folly, not concerted evil. Rather than targeting the obscene cruelties borne of greed and fostered by apathy, they harp on a rogues’ gallery of hypocrites familiar to anyone with a TiVo or a functioning memory. Wit, exaggeration, and gentle mockery trump ridicule and invective. The goal is to mollify people, not incite them...

  • @Jdp129
    @Jdp129 2 года назад +59

    Tonight’s monologue was exquisite!!! Thank you To Stephen and all the writers!!!

    • @RainmanCT
      @RainmanCT 2 года назад

      Good lord, really? Please tell me which line(s) made you actually laugh. Was it the dog now being of legal drinking age or that he shouldn't be driving? Genuinely curious. I used to love this show.

    • @pakababy3710
      @pakababy3710 2 года назад

      @@RainmanCT How about the Statue of Liberty is now holding a match? Get a sense of humor rainman.

    • @Jdp129
      @Jdp129 2 года назад

      @@RainmanCT the whole thing Linda, the whole thing! You are one angry human if you can’t find joy in his comedy.

    • @RainmanCT
      @RainmanCT 2 года назад

      @@Jdp129 i have found great joy in Stephen's comedy, i just think that his current writing staff is awful and unfunny. Check out "Strangers with Candy" and compare truly brilliant humor to the dumbed-down jokes he is telling now.

    • @RainmanCT
      @RainmanCT 2 года назад

      @@pakababy3710 That one actually made you laugh? You must be easy to please my friend, perhaps you are his target audience. Thank you for responding.

  • @KM-ub2cc
    @KM-ub2cc 2 года назад +7

    We may be roasting in the UK, but we always appreciate an extra dose of Colbert roasting!

  • @teenygozer
    @teenygozer 2 года назад +54

    Just got back from a vacation in Hawaii, two blasts from the past: Hawaiian malls are still incredibly popular and full of crowds (including teens just hanging out) and they still have telephone booths (the open-air/on a pole kind) on the streets.

  • @kathleenkelly938
    @kathleenkelly938 2 года назад +156

    I can't go to bed without Stephen. He's the best. He's even a 🐕 dog lover, in addition to being the most literate raconteur on late night television.

    • @Omni0404
      @Omni0404 2 года назад

      I wish he'd sleep in *my* bed.

    • @LolUGotBusted
      @LolUGotBusted 2 года назад +5

      Good word

    • @runnergo1398
      @runnergo1398 2 года назад

      Geezuz friggin Christ. You bots are rampant!

    • @staceykersting705
      @staceykersting705 2 года назад

      Every year, in the US, 5 million dogs are put to death for lack of good homes. Meanwhile, we allow 5 million more puppies to be born. Do the math...Spay/neuter...adopt/don't shop!

    • @gracemunich1476
      @gracemunich1476 2 года назад

      one of the most literate, check out Trevor Noah. Both Stephen and Trevor are friends and both are brilliant

  • @arenc5619
    @arenc5619 2 года назад +195

    So glad you’re back! You and Seth Meyers! It’s been rough on these streets w/o y’all!

    • @Omni0404
      @Omni0404 2 года назад +11

      And Trevor Noah

    • @dirtyfrench2926
      @dirtyfrench2926 2 года назад +10

      @@Omni0404 And John Oliver. They've all been on hiatus for a minute...

    • @Omni0404
      @Omni0404 2 года назад +8

      @@dirtyfrench2926 Oh I didn't realize we'd be getting a new Lastweek Tonight this Sunday. Bonus

    • @Jmaal89
      @Jmaal89 2 года назад

      Seth and his dad jokes way of comedy

    • @elmarobberts5128
      @elmarobberts5128 2 года назад +1

      @@dirtyfrench2926 Yes, I always miss him the most. At least he brings us those hilarious Web Specials.

  • @The_Real_Mier
    @The_Real_Mier 2 года назад +28

    Living in the Netherlands we had a similar day like the UK.
    Also not used nor prepared for extreme heat.
    But I have a great, though be it slightly radical, solution for myself: I broke my spine and currently in the hospital… great airconditioning here!!
    So my daughter spend the whole day with me, escaping her student room where it simply was unbearable!!
    LOLOLOL!
    Gotta find the GOOD in EVERY SITUATION!!! 💪

    • @henrygvidonas9573
      @henrygvidonas9573 2 года назад +4

      Get well! I'm sticking with all available fans running and ice cubes, while I'm patiently waiting for the forecasted thunderstorm later like a wuss. I'm not _that_ radical...

    • @The_Real_Mier
      @The_Real_Mier 2 года назад +1

      @@henrygvidonas9573 LOL! Sounds like a better plan though!
      Thanks for the well wishes

  • @annemettefrederiksen7751
    @annemettefrederiksen7751 2 года назад +4

    Happy Birthday to Benny, we always love to see the cutest star of the Colbert household 🎉🎊💝. Love having dogdaddy back to save my sanity,even the cutest furbaby cant do that in these times..

  • @cassandrakarpinski9416
    @cassandrakarpinski9416 2 года назад +9

    Awww happy birthday benny. Who's a good boy, you're a good boy

  • @jackharrison7613
    @jackharrison7613 2 года назад +89

    Happy Birthday Benny. Many more happy years to you.

  • @johngomes8874
    @johngomes8874 2 года назад +24

    Great segment.. happy birthday benny

  • @shermanculbertson6244
    @shermanculbertson6244 2 года назад +860

    My day just isn’t complete without Stephen’s monologue.

    • @couragekarnga8735
      @couragekarnga8735 2 года назад +20

      I'm so glad he's back! "Nights are forever without you!"

    • @jenerhart7025
      @jenerhart7025 2 года назад +11

      Me too!

    • @vash121086
      @vash121086 2 года назад +19

      Same this is usually the last thing I watch before bed. Good jokes and great entertainment.

    • @JKallday19
      @JKallday19 2 года назад +5

      Preachh

    • @lillyanderson3623
      @lillyanderson3623 2 года назад +4

      Same

  • @blisss2159
    @blisss2159 2 года назад +67

    Stephen, no one here is ok when you disappear for two entire weeks! I mean, I get it - you are a human being who needs to rest (occasionally). But please don’t leave us alone for this long ever again. Life is just not the same without you.

    • @blisss2159
      @blisss2159 2 года назад

      @darknightoftroy You’re such a joy!

    • @steveng7174
      @steveng7174 2 года назад

      Pathetic...

    • @blisss2159
      @blisss2159 2 года назад +1

      @@steveng7174 would that be your first name or last?

    • @steveng7174
      @steveng7174 2 года назад

      @@blisss2159 Could you pause from contemplating your navel long enough to come up with something relevant?

  • @maxineceraolo7568
    @maxineceraolo7568 2 года назад +5

    The calculator gag has been getting me since Strangers with Candy and it still gets me every time.

  • @angelapancella6063
    @angelapancella6063 2 года назад +1004

    I appreciate Stephen's commitment to never saying the former president's name, even if it means he needs to say the phrase "the former president" three times in a single sentence.

    • @couragekarnga8735
      @couragekarnga8735 2 года назад +58

      I love him for that!

    • @gamepapa1211
      @gamepapa1211 2 года назад +78

      I personally love the nicknames. "Jabba the Putz" was chef's kiss perfection!

    • @gamepapa1211
      @gamepapa1211 2 года назад +55

      Also, it's because if you say his name three times he will burst through a mirror and grab you by the you-know-what.

    • @virginiaf.5764
      @virginiaf.5764 2 года назад

      When you think about it it's really not longer ... it's actually shorter than having to say "that orange a-hole who ran the country into the ground for 4 years".

    • @chrisdonovan8795
      @chrisdonovan8795 2 года назад +19

      Who?

  • @RoseOf1000Colors
    @RoseOf1000Colors 2 года назад +126

    Happy birthday to one of the best puppies! :D Thank you for sharing that footage with us, Stephen, the world needs more of that lately.

    • @seppeisenmann8710
      @seppeisenmann8710 2 года назад +3

      I wish the Benny segment was a bit longer. 😊💖😁

    • @seppeisenmann8710
      @seppeisenmann8710 2 года назад

      @Prigiyan Short Is your post even relevant to this show, bot?

    • @gracemunich1476
      @gracemunich1476 2 года назад

      @@seppeisenmann8710 nope. the bit was reported.

  • @Thuktun
    @Thuktun 2 года назад +39

    Look at all the all-time-record-breaking heat waves. Again. Almost like the climate is changing or something.

    • @JLee-rt6ve
      @JLee-rt6ve 2 года назад +13

      Weird, right? It's not like somebody warned us this was going to happen.

  • @jenniferburns2530
    @jenniferburns2530 2 года назад +2

    Happy birthday Benny! Keep loving your dad so he can keep us sane.

  • @angelariebli4843
    @angelariebli4843 2 года назад +17

    Happy Birthday Benny!!!! A man who loves his dog, is a good man!

  • @traekas7228
    @traekas7228 2 года назад +21

    Happy birthday 🎂, Benny!

  • @SN-sz7kw
    @SN-sz7kw 2 года назад +25

    As a child (midcentury) the mall walk was outdoors, beautifully landscaped with ample seating. And cool (tempwise). How I miss it. And Newberry‘s - what a simple child‘s pleasure. I‘d give a lot for a nostalgic wander through a midcentury Newberry‘s followed by Dairy Queen.

  • @jamesburk8145
    @jamesburk8145 2 года назад +340

    So remember when Bannon got a pardon? Getting pardoned doesn't mean you didn't do the crime, it's actually the opposite. It means you admit to doing the crime but the president says you get to go free anyway.

    • @GailColeman
      @GailColeman 2 года назад +44

      It also doesn't shield him from future crimes, like refusing a lawful subpoena from Congress.

    • @CSpad
      @CSpad 2 года назад

      Also means he can't invoke his 5th amendment on crimes he was pardoned for.
      Many lawyers think that's why Trump didn't pardon more people so they can't speak openly about conspiracy crimes etc. That he may or may not have been involved in.

    • @chaosmarklar
      @chaosmarklar 2 года назад

      Bannon got a pardon for stealing the 'build a wall' donations and the people he robbed cheered when he was pardoned

    • @artbargra
      @artbargra 2 года назад +1

      What did you expect? The former president and his goons couldn't possibly understand the law, unless puppets and crayons are involved.

    • @stuckn.derplahoma562
      @stuckn.derplahoma562 2 года назад +4

      @Prigiyan Short

  • @janetbeebe6578
    @janetbeebe6578 2 года назад +1

    OMG! I forgot how much I missed Stephen Colbert. 🥰

  • @228Brendon
    @228Brendon 2 года назад +28

    “Speaking of Odor” and the crowd goes wild over a pic of Steve Bannon.

  • @Hemojang
    @Hemojang 2 года назад +7

    Thank you so much for putting this on YT!

  • @esscott24
    @esscott24 2 года назад +110

    I love that he doesn't even try to make it look like he's typing 😂😂

    • @Ava-wu4qp
      @Ava-wu4qp 2 года назад +4

      Oops all knuckles

  • @owenjennings2151
    @owenjennings2151 2 года назад +572

    As a brit I can safely say I would rather be dodging the heat in England than dodging bullets in America 😂

    • @guiguiregismercer5720
      @guiguiregismercer5720 2 года назад +20

      You don’t risk much if you are white sadly

    • @cc1k435
      @cc1k435 2 года назад +27

      Actually, we have both. But in the south where it's expected every year, at least there's air conditioning, which is doubly good since it's no longer safe to leave the house. 🤔

    • @gamepapa1211
      @gamepapa1211 2 года назад

      @@guiguiregismercer5720 unless if you're a child, in which case being white doesn't immunize you from bullets in America.
      ...too soon?

    • @danielgehring7437
      @danielgehring7437 2 года назад +34

      @@cc1k435 My friend still uses the air conditioner she has with a bullet hole in it, so yes, we definitely have both.

    • @NanaWil
      @NanaWil 2 года назад +23

      @@guiguiregismercer5720 well their skin colour didn't help the uvalde children...

  • @travishimebaugh8381
    @travishimebaugh8381 2 года назад +3

    Happy birthday Benny! I've lived with five dogs, watched two grow up and two pass on, and they sniff you in spirit

  • @nidialuccioni4476
    @nidialuccioni4476 2 года назад

    Happy Birthday Benny !
    So Cute So Adorable So Precious Little Doggy

  • @bethnasca4720
    @bethnasca4720 2 года назад +16

    Thank you for another great monologue. You really are awesome 😎

  • @Peace_Dog
    @Peace_Dog 2 года назад +159

    If only we would have had some kind of warning about global warming decades earlier from that guy who helped pass legislation to fund the development of the internet. Could you imagine a guy that smart being president?

    • @dannykumite
      @dannykumite 2 года назад +1

      Shhh we don't say global warming anymore. That's too scary. It's climate change. See, less urgency.

    • @pete_lind
      @pete_lind 2 года назад +1

      Climate change theory is over 100 year old and was proven to be correct before WW 2 by an American mathematician , we have had over 80 years to do something ,
      Oil companies 100 year in business jubilee in 1950s , one main topic was climate change , after that they all did their own studies that verified climate change in 1970s.
      Seems that the" greatest" generation did not give a flying poop about this planet after WW 2 .

    • @AisuruMirai
      @AisuruMirai 2 года назад +43

      If someone invents a time machine, I want them to go back and convince Al Gore to come out hard _in favor_ of global warming so the GOP would reflexively oppose him and thus accidentally save humanity.

    • @roni6215
      @roni6215 2 года назад +6

      Not in America.

    • @lenawagenfuehr53
      @lenawagenfuehr53 2 года назад +3

      You mean that overhyped guy who made a movie that was mostly him driving or flying around lecturing the rest of us about the evils of fossil fuels? Mr Do as I say, not as I do?

  • @cyanmaelstrom
    @cyanmaelstrom 2 года назад +16

    I live in Oklahoma, so I can confirm. It is Hell in here, both in politics and weather.

  • @therelaxationstation5258
    @therelaxationstation5258 2 года назад +1

    Happy Birthday Benny !! 🤗🤗🤗❤️❤️❤️🎊🎉🎈🎈

  • @KohalaLover
    @KohalaLover 2 года назад +1

    Benny is adorable. 🐶

  • @hugeinjapan4635
    @hugeinjapan4635 2 года назад +63

    As a Californian, I support as little clothing as possible. Unless you're cooking bacon.

    • @jeannefoster5594
      @jeannefoster5594 2 года назад +4

      Hahaha! Thanks for that.

    • @obi-ron
      @obi-ron 2 года назад +1

      Alas, as I am of a rather large size, I fear going out in the sun with little to cover me would be a case of cooking bacon, my own 😆

  • @pandoraeeris7860
    @pandoraeeris7860 2 года назад +13

    Executive Privilege never applied to Bannon no matter what Trump said.

  • @alimfuzzy
    @alimfuzzy 2 года назад +11

    I remember at school in Australia there was a rumour if it hit 40C you get to go home. Nope, you still have to spend it in the demountable classroom where the fans don't work and the windows don't open.

    • @krejados1
      @krejados1 2 года назад +1

      In Germany, the schools would announce Hitze-frei (heat-free) on super-hot days. Instead of ending at 1300, the school day ended at 11:20. That was way back in the 70s (Gads but I'm old!)

  • @faustocardy5018
    @faustocardy5018 2 года назад +6

    This is one of the funniest monologues from Colbert this year 🤣🤣

  • @curiousnerdkitteh
    @curiousnerdkitteh 2 года назад +10

    When Stephen started singing the Oklahoma song I suddenly realised how badly I want to see him performing in John Oliver's next spectacular musical number.

  • @laalaa99stl
    @laalaa99stl 2 года назад +44

    Why should Bannon care about being in contempt of Congress if he's already in contempt of the US Constitution?

    • @couragekarnga8735
      @couragekarnga8735 2 года назад +13

      And the rest of us hold him in general contempt!

    • @richard1472
      @richard1472 2 года назад +12

      He'll get his indictment while he's serving time for contempt of congress.
      Oh, the irony!

    • @gamepapa1211
      @gamepapa1211 2 года назад +8

      If I could upvote your comment more than once I would.

    • @paulclissold1525
      @paulclissold1525 2 года назад

      Bannon knows its all temporary post november the slate gets wiped clean. Republicans will overcome.

    • @myownbiz5461
      @myownbiz5461 2 года назад

      Not to mention, decent hygiene!

  • @YukonBloamie
    @YukonBloamie 2 года назад +270

    "You have the right to remain silent but deadly."
    That person needs a raise. When you write the best joke in the monologue but the audience doesn't know it...

    • @DKProduction-oo4yj
      @DKProduction-oo4yj 2 года назад +4

      40,3 C is exactly 104 Fahrenheit

    • @Rocknroll73
      @Rocknroll73 2 года назад +6

      @@DKProduction-oo4yj Since you had to say "exactly", 40.3C is exactly 104.54F. The rule of thumb is 9F for every 5C, 20-68; 25-77; 30-86; 35-95; 40-104; 45-113. Thank you Canadian education system. ;-)

    • @Surge1077
      @Surge1077 2 года назад +1

      I don't usually laugh out loud at his monologue, but that joke had me cackling...

    • @YukonBloamie
      @YukonBloamie 2 года назад

      @@Rocknroll73 or as I call it, it's hot in der

    • @mjgenualdi22
      @mjgenualdi22 2 года назад

      @@DKProduction-oo4yj 104.54

  • @susiehenders
    @susiehenders 2 года назад +12

    We love your British tailored jokes over here! Thanks Stephen 😁

    • @petertaylor4980
      @petertaylor4980 2 года назад

      I was puzzled by the mint jelly.

    • @joshoshea3194
      @joshoshea3194 2 года назад +1

      @@petertaylor4980 yeah me to what was that about? Unless he means mint sauce that we put on lamb for Sunday dinner?

    • @hannahdyson7129
      @hannahdyson7129 2 года назад +1

      @@petertaylor4980 The food they associate with our cuisine isn't something most of us eat. I don't know anyone who eats spotted dick / black pudding / jellied eels.
      It's a bit like us assuming they eat pancakes or breakfast pizza every day

    • @petertaylor4980
      @petertaylor4980 2 года назад

      @@hannahdyson7129, sure, but they're at least things which have associations: spotted dick is a traditional English pudding; black pudding is part of a really complete full English breakfast; jellied eels are traditional Cockney pub grub. But mint jelly appears to be an American invention. A better analogy would be Brits claiming that haggis is a stereotypical food to eat in the US.

  • @stainlesssteelfox1
    @stainlesssteelfox1 2 года назад +2

    104 degrees Fahrenheit. As a Brit, I'd like to point out that stone buildings are also good for keeping heat out.

  • @abigailhubbard1055
    @abigailhubbard1055 2 года назад +14

    Harrah for capitalism. It's not "Go to the library, where you get air conditioning and everything is free." No, it's "Go to the shopping mall, where you can get air conditioning while spending money on stuff you don't need."

  • @sanjosejazzfan
    @sanjosejazzfan 2 года назад +13

    That was Stephen Colbert doing Regis Philbin doing Steve Bannon. And that's my final answer, Stephen.

  • @newhorizonsforfifty2833
    @newhorizonsforfifty2833 2 года назад +21

    That thing he does with the calculator is EXACTLY how I feel about calculating that mess out.

    • @tmarritt
      @tmarritt 2 года назад

      If it helps don't bother converting. 0 is freezing temp of water. 100 is boiling point.
      And one more important one to remember is that human body temp is around 37.5° so anything approaching that number is very uncomfortable, anything exceeding it is dangerous.

  • @kristinem9171
    @kristinem9171 2 года назад +43

    This was a particularly hilarious monolog I think there's onky one other i laughed at harder!!

  • @sassiejoan
    @sassiejoan 2 года назад +1

    Happy birthday, Benny! 🐾🎉🇦🇺

  • @jwilk5606
    @jwilk5606 2 года назад +3

    8:13 Wow, Steve looks more appealing in the court drawings, than in real life lol

  • @danoeb-g418
    @danoeb-g418 2 года назад +13

    I always forget that the weather here in Canada is so extreme. Where I live the temperature swings about 80-90 degrees Celsius. From about 45 to -45 throughout the year

    • @DneilB007
      @DneilB007 2 года назад +2

      Or, if you’re in Calgary, in 45 minutes when the chinook hits

    • @giannaleng1897
      @giannaleng1897 2 года назад +2

      Canada has also been under heat wave warnings but they’re actually pretty common during summer time. Our weather just fluctuates like fucking crazy throughout the year. It’s -45 degrees celsius in winter and 40 degrees in summer. It’s actually shaping up to be 30 degrees feeling like 40 today in Ottawa where I’m from 🫠 it’s a fucking nightmare lmao

  • @Opus313
    @Opus313 2 года назад +30

    Oprah must have been in New York lately.
    You get a joint... and you get a joint... everybody gets a joint!

    • @Marijuanifornia
      @Marijuanifornia 2 года назад

      It's too bad that stoners don't care about weed.
      Weed stopped Hitler and will stop climate change, too.
      The US government has a lot of information online about this, but no one cares because they're too busy buying corporate weed that was grown indoors using electricity derived from fossil fuels, adding to climate change. Good job, Americans.

  • @teddymartinii1979
    @teddymartinii1979 2 года назад +30

    It was 106F here yesterday, but it's Texas, so just another mid-summer heat wave. My friends in Europe are suffering. None of them have air-conditioning. BTW, 40.3 Celsius is 104F. Yeah, that's hot, even in Texas.

    • @sweetman5249
      @sweetman5249 2 года назад +3

      In Phoenix Arizona, it is 114 Fahrenheit these days .

    • @paulclissold1525
      @paulclissold1525 2 года назад

      But glenn just like the gun problem the greenhouse, which apparently doesnt exist, isnt a problem either. Please contact your local friendly trumpet or just watch fox.

    • @McCammalot
      @McCammalot 2 года назад +6

      And it's considerably more humid in the UK, which makes it FAR worse.

    • @Marijuanifornia
      @Marijuanifornia 2 года назад

      No one cares. No one is going to solve the problem. No one is going to change their lifestyle. It's only going to get worse. This is nothing. In just a few short years, everyone will be begging for the temperature to drop down to a mere 40.3C.

  • @autumbreeze1129
    @autumbreeze1129 2 года назад +17

    Cherish your time with Benny, Stephen.
    We lost our family dog, Jack Russell (take a wild guess what breed he was), last month.
    He was an old dog. He is missed.
    Happy Birthday, Benny

  • @tami4951
    @tami4951 2 года назад +13

    Happy Birthday, Benny!
    Who's a good boy?!🐶

  • @monikajcm5563
    @monikajcm5563 2 года назад +4

    🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂 Lots of love from the UK, from a very pale British redhead 👩🏻‍🦰😘🥰

  • @lavoz7456
    @lavoz7456 2 года назад +27

    I love Stephen’s show, never go on vacation please lol.

    • @gracemunich1476
      @gracemunich1476 2 года назад

      we all need vacation but please not not Stephen and Trevor at the same time….please…kind request

  • @PixiePrix
    @PixiePrix 2 года назад +19

    Don't do it! My husband, quite literally, brought covid home after he went to the mall and got lured in by the chicken teriyaki guy. 3 years we avoided this virus and it finally got us because my husband had some free time before work and went to the mall!

  • @jennifergridley8111
    @jennifergridley8111 2 года назад

    Awww sweet Benny 🥰 happy birthday 🎂 🥳 🎉 🎈 🎁 🎊 🎂

  • @nyerineu3388
    @nyerineu3388 2 года назад +1

    SebumSteve, Jabba the Putz, what a pair of Schmucks ....luv it!

  • @atomthegreat541
    @atomthegreat541 2 года назад +13

    I usually wait till the morning to watch these when I wake up because it boosts my serotonin level in a major way, at least i feel like it does and, if it feels like it does, then it does..

  • @hereigoagain5050
    @hereigoagain5050 2 года назад +10

    Benny's bday cake made me fall out of my chair!

  • @dailybunnymemes2545
    @dailybunnymemes2545 2 года назад +12

    Watched Stephen Colbert. Now I can sleep.

  • @bennieparker722
    @bennieparker722 2 года назад

    Love it when you sing!

  • @wonderchild53
    @wonderchild53 2 года назад

    THANKS, STEPHEN...!!!!! FOR THE HUMOR

  • @blaze556922
    @blaze556922 2 года назад +17

    Actually that's not at all how dog years work. We've adjusted that scale quite some time ago. The first two years of a dog's life are equal to 25 years and then they age approximately 4 years for every human year after that. Most animals mature quickly. Many can even walk within hours of being born.

    • @blaze556922
      @blaze556922 2 года назад +1

      @darknightoftroy It doesn't matter to everyone but some people like to have a gauge for their little furry companions lifespans. No worries friend :)

  • @gixellia8455
    @gixellia8455 2 года назад +6

    Oh, I love Benny!

  • @viperleader001
    @viperleader001 2 года назад +13

    I love it when he breaks down mathematics and science!!!!

  • @bouldertabbie3194
    @bouldertabbie3194 2 года назад

    🎂 Happy Birthday Benny 🎂🦴🎂
    Welcome back from your vacation Mr. C!!
    I have missed your laughs!! Tonight was hilarious!! 🤣

  • @bernardwalden6884
    @bernardwalden6884 2 года назад

    Happy Birthday Benny 🎂🎈🎉
    Steve Bannon 😂🤣😂🤣
    Please politely pop the squat 😂
    👏👏👏👏👏. ✌️❤️

  • @papatroll9545
    @papatroll9545 2 года назад +6

    I opened RUclips and almost shed a tear when I saw this video. This is such a balm for my soul.

    • @zeebzeebo
      @zeebzeebo 2 года назад

      really. sheesh, you live a sad life.

  • @starrdust13
    @starrdust13 2 года назад +14

    Awww Benny 🥹 too adorable! So glad Stephen is back 😊

  • @thecorporatelawgroup7093
    @thecorporatelawgroup7093 2 года назад

    Thank you Steve. I also hold The US Congress in contempt!!

  • @billyakin3301
    @billyakin3301 2 года назад +13

    Bennie is 30 today dammit!🤣
    Happy birthday Bennie!!

  • @risingdawn2day
    @risingdawn2day 2 года назад +6

    Oh thank goodness. I was low key depressed without my colbert fix. I almost ran out of interwebs to fill my revenge bedtime hours.

  • @normanross2668
    @normanross2668 2 года назад +12

    I wish someone would share the UK heat story with that "good oil boy" Joe Manchin.

    • @krejados1
      @krejados1 2 года назад +6

      He don't even care about his own constituents, let alone his own country. Why would he give any phucks about the UK?

  • @cynthiahernandez3598
    @cynthiahernandez3598 2 года назад +1

    looooove when he brings out that stupid calculator thing! Lol

  • @PhoenixProdLLC
    @PhoenixProdLLC 2 года назад +1

    D'awwww, Happy Birthday Benny! 🎂🐶🎉🤗

  • @acenterprices
    @acenterprices 2 года назад +5

    My wife passed last Sunday July 17 2022. She love your show. Thank you for all the laughs.

  • @Supernov4
    @Supernov4 2 года назад +15

    "Why can't they stay puppies forever"
    -Matt Gaetz probably

    • @henrygvidonas9573
      @henrygvidonas9573 2 года назад +4

      That was wholly unnecessary! Matt Gaetz should never be talked about in polite society, just like all other inflamed bloody haemorrhoids!

  • @remylewis8721
    @remylewis8721 2 года назад +7

    "Morphius before labor day" took me out

  • @cannibalbananas
    @cannibalbananas 2 года назад +1

    Happy Belated Benny!! I hope you got all the treats you wanted 🐶

  • @LMays-cu2hp
    @LMays-cu2hp 2 года назад

    Thank you for sharing..

  • @CJFerg81
    @CJFerg81 2 года назад +18

    I see Benny, I click. More please 😁

  • @mrtompinney
    @mrtompinney 2 года назад +11

    My dog heard the cake was shaped like a stranger’s crotch and perked up. 😂😂