Adult with Autism | Dark Side of Autism | Autism Superpowers
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- Опубликовано: 12 сен 2024
- The Dark Side of Autism series covers areas of Autism that I personally feel are misrepresented or overlooked.
In this video, I talk about the saying 'Autism is a superpower', and how it feels by people like me at my point on the Spectrum. Spoiler alert...I am not too fond of this saying by any stretch of the imagination for anyone over the age of 8.
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I'm learning to become a coder and eventually a software engineer. People say my ability to teach myself coding is my autistic superpower. They overlook the fact that there are neurotypicals who do what I do and have a social life at the same time.
The most repeated phrase I’ve used in my life is “I hate people. Not individual people, well some are ok. I hate people as a collective. People are stupid and irrational.”
I heard a similar 'the person is smart, people are stupid'. It stuck with me.
The fact that you can "knock away the nonsense and look at what is left " is your superpower. If only the majority of people could do this, the world would be a far better place.
It really would. So much of the world is built on non-sensical drama and fraudulent activity.
We are not the supermen of the world,we are the Clark Kent’s trying to blend into society very awkward and possibly seen as a bit strange by most people when are mask’s slip a bit 😂
Haha, that's right! A stark warning for me to also stop going in public with my undies over my trousers! 😂
One reason why autism may seem like "superpower" is the ability of many autisic people to analyze things and view things without any nonsense. Because, and this may sound harsh and mean, most NT people have only tiny fraction of that capability. They have too much ego, feelings, emotional investment and other weirdness in the way, so they often cant see things as they are. NT people have usually hard time seeing things clearly.
But I do agree. If this is a supper power, it comes with quite hefty price
... There was a thing in the beginning of your video, something I needed to comment, but then I watched the whole video, and my mind got fixed to some other topic. What a supper power this is indeed
Haha, I share your super power of getting distracted. In fact, it's one of my stronger super powers!
Faxx 😊😊
“I can’t socialize. I don’t see the point. I don’t get anything from it”
Same here. I was so confused growing up as I saw everyone else socializing and they seemed to love it and thrive off it. I on the other hand, had to force it. I learned good social skills at a young age in an attempt to help me enjoy socializing more - it didn’t work at all. I used drugs and alcohol in my late teens and 20s to help me feel more
Motivated to socialize - they did work for awhile . I hate to say it but if it weren’t for drugs/alcohol I would have never had any sort of social life when growing up. I still wasn’t outgoing but I had a tiny dose of social life thanks to the chemicals. I had no clue about autism back then and I really forced myself to talk to people but never enjoyed it and always felt drained by it - this led to quite a bit of depression and detachment as it was so hard to relate to others .. at 38 I realized I had autism . And here we are a year later and still confused by it all
I got nothing after diagnosis either. Not great when I had no idea what Autism was. Hence just throwing myself at it and trying to figure out who the real me is. Still not mastered it 👍🏻
Where this particularly hit me hard, regarding employment and the difficulties of basically having to negotiate conditions that allow us to function in the workplace, is that the only real option we have is to be self employed. Somehow the best "solution" for high functioning autistic people being employed is to ignore their needs and encourage them to find something within themselves that they can sell. Because we're not worth accommodating, nor are our tremendous work ethics valuable when ethics themselves are a lie neurotypicals pretend they follow when people are looking but so often seek to undermine when they can. This is why I am so adamant about keeping my comfortable just barely liveable job which demands little of me, but also has no real major career progression or value. If I want to succeed in life I need that stability to find what in my skillset is commercially profitable and I can't do that in a workplace that doesn't want to respect that I need a task to perform unsupervised and I will succeed. The "superpower" mentality is so centrally focused around people who have managed to find what they can profit off of, or the conditions to focus, and often both. The average autistic person has neither.
Very well put Remy.
It rings true for me in the workplace and just wanting to do the work, and unsupervised. If I do the job right once, I will repeat that process forever more, I don't need to be checked up on or watched over, they just need to trust the process. The more micro-managed I get, the quicker I burnout and want to leave. Its just a way of saying 'I don't trust you'.
But it is the behaviour of non autistic people that birthed the distrust, yet I'm the one it's taken out on.
Very odd, and disheartening.
Very well put!
No such thing as super power it’s a disability and society always discrimates against us
@@alexanderblake1645 hate being micromanaged
Absolutely want to be freelance to do what works for me.
It would be like trying to explain to someone with dwarfism that they have a superpower because they can fit into small places that most others can't fit; it completely ignores all the other major disadvantages.
Good point 👍🏻
I agree. When I was diagnosed it wasn’t anything more than someone telling me there’s a word for how I experience the world. It’s not a superpower, not least because I wouldn’t choose it if I didn’t have it.
That being said, I think it’s just a way for some people to deal with the diagnosis. It’s difficult being told that the problems you have will likely never go away; reframing this in overly positive terms seems to help some people. I wish it could help me, but being isolated and not being able to hold down a proper job isn’t exactly going to make me the next Marvel led character.
I'd prefer to watch that Marvel character in all fairness. But the problems only don't go away because the world we live in and the people in it, won't allow it. That's not our fault 👍🏻
Unfortunately the media has only shown an interest in those with a diagnosis of Autism who have a 'gift' or 'superpower' However, these individuals who are savants are few and far between, but because those with autism possess such fascinating neurological processes the media and uneducated latch on to this. The majority of those with autism are just trying to navigate their way through life, most of the time if they are lucky pursuing their interest. Having worked in the field of autism for over 8 years working with adults on both ends of the spectrum I have never come across an individual with a 'superpower'. Thought processes on the other hand were phenomenal that no NT could ever understand. I believe this is where the media and uneducated folk sit at a cross road and label us. However, I suppose labeling someone as a savant is just as damaging! We never actually dive deep and appreciate someone for who they are.
Thanks Alex. Good point made. As I've said many times, people like me don't make good television. I care about the perspective of Autism being created for those who don't know much about it, just a one sided public image of people with Superpowers is inaccurate in my opinion.
Im not diagnosed but my wife deeply believes I have autism. To be honest I agree with her.
If I do have it I will tell anyone it isnt a super power to not be capable of building deep relationships with other people and to never be understood your entire life. Knowing youll die potentially never feeling a "true connection" with a human being.
Yeah some super power -_-
I'm with ya on pretty much everything man, as usual
Thanks Jensen 👍🏻
These videos have kept me sane during a really testing year of my life. Thanks a bunch for existing.
I'm really glad they have been useful to you 👍🏻
I understand the the feeling of having a superpower! Another utuber described it as if she finaly got the hogwarts letter. For all my live i have hidden myself, i was ashamed of myself. This diagnosis gave me the feeling of not being a shitty human, and the final autism diagmosis is clearly revealing a superpower to me...
If it helps you, then I'll never argue with that 👍🏻
44 just realized I am autistic
Thank you for sharing. I feel validated.
No worries 👍🏻
Love this video and the points you make about teaching real life skills in school resonated with me so much! As well as being forced to learn about things we could care less about, not to mention being discouraged from deeply learning about the things we are passionate about. But that could be its own hours long video!
I agree with your points and it seems rather condescending for a neurotypical person to ask or assume we have super powers. I do have a different perspective to offer on the superpower idea. I think when anybody can do something extremely well and it comes easier to them than the vast majority of others, that is viewed akin to a superpower.
Autism comes with many struggles and hardships, doesn’t “socializing” almost seem like a superpower to many of us? Haha! The point is this: because of the way our brains are wired differently, many things that are easy for neurotypical people are sometimes extremely difficult if not impossible for us, but conversely, we can do certain things very well that would be near impossible for them. Common ones are the ability to hyper focus on a task (find me a better researcher than an autistic) and anything related to having overwired sensory circuits really. Having an extremely keen detection of details, being able to smell, taste, hear and feel things others can’t can be useful in some instances as well as frustrating and overwhelming.
That’s what I think of when people say superpowers. They are second nature to me so they don’t seem anything special, but I do recognize they are unusual traits that can come in handy.
It can be a devastating diagnosis late in life. As much as the relief that comes from knowing “oh, that’s why I do this, that’s why I’m like that” it can also be a dark hole of despair when you realize that all this stuff is just easy for most people and even with your monumental efforts to do some of those things, it still does make the grade. It would be nice to think it has some great upsides and “superpowers” to counterbalance the enormous challenges, so I do see the appeal. But only in regards to us telling ourselves and each other that, not coming from neurotypicals where it only reads as condescension.
Good points. When we are so used to doing things a way we need to, and that way just so happens to be fully considered and to a high standard, it can be seen as a positive trait indeed. I just don't think personally I'll ever get passed feeling like it is a touch condescending when my consideration for ensuring I've considered all possibilities and outcomes as a 'superpower'. Nope, it took a ton of energy and effort! The praise feels watered down for me 👍🏻
Working my way through catching up on all your vids, and this might be my favorite of your vids so far. Maybe not, I have "downloaded" several of your chats to re-watch and absorb. ... Just .. so unbelievably HELPFUL what you're bringing to the table, and I feel you. Though that's rather a horrible expression. How about .. Words can't express how much I appreciate your take, your (key word) Rational approach, even your frustrations have a "calming" effect on me. Not sure what that means. Anywhoo - Critically valuable distinctions you are making .. this time it was the "dis-abled" vs. "in-able" .. I'm apt to fly in the face of ANY "trend" anyway, and it's made all the worse by the way autism is portrayed even by the most well-meaning of folks ... :) :( *sigh* THANK you again, Paul.
I'm just glad there is some useful things in amongst my 'talks' 👍🏻
Very all this. 👍😎
My GOD...it's like looking in the mirror, but in the timeline where I'm a man with a beard and I know how to express myself orally. Incredible! 😄
I'm 46 now, and just started employment counselling 'cause I can't figure out how to get a job stocking shelves in a grocery store. I was a head cook/kitchen manager once upon time. I was very good at it, but it almost killed me. I know I can work if the workplace works for me. It's like they won't let me do something that doesn't live up to what they perceive to be "my potential". Infuriating. Exhausting. I'm not built for this world. It wasn't built by or for the likes of me. 😖
You've no idea how many people I've spoken to who mention working stocking shelves / warehousing. Even when people ask me a job I've enjoyed, I always reference the job where I working managing stock levels. Must be a link!
And never say never with getting a beard 😂
@@AdultwithAutism Interesting. I like sorting and organizing. I like Tetris. I like interior decorating. I like merchandising. I like putting objects where they belong! I like structure and repetition and routine. I like to know what to expect and to know what is expected of me. I like working independently. I think I'd be a great shelf stocker!
I'll work towards that dream and leave the bearding to you. You are obviously a pro! 😁
I'll stick to the beard growing. Actually get to see my go to groomer this coming week. He's a popular cookie these days so visits are few and far between.
I think that's why I don't stress moving house. I like packing, organising, putting things where they need to go, and making sure they have a suitable and logical home when I land elsewhere.
@@AdultwithAutism My compliments to your groomer! I'm not usually fond of facial hair, but your visage has convinced me to reconsider. I learned how to cut my own hair (trial and lots of error) 'cause going to a hairdresser is beyond what I can handle (or afford).
I have to move in a week. It's usually no big deal...I've moved a million times...but I am in such a state of burnout, I can't really fathom how it's going to happen. I know I'll rise to the occasion. I always do. The shock of suddenly and unexpectedly losing my solitude and independence has really knocked me down. I grieved as though a friend had died. Some days I cannot wait for this life to be over. My patience is wearing thin! 🤪
Forgive me for rambling on. Please don't feel obligated to respond. I just resonate with you and it has stirred up a lot of thoughts. 🙂
I know I've said it in other comments but I appreciate you didn't give into pressure to have kids. It would have been to much for you and your kids. Not far to them either. If that makes sense.
The education system is cracked. I totally agree with you! My daughter asks the same questions.
I don't like that its called a disability. And I'm definitely not as high functioning as you. But it's not a disability to me. Just off putting to others. Its only disabling to me because its a Nero typical world. It trips me up. I hope i make sense.
Also enjoy your moaning. Someone has to be real. And i appreciate it.
It isn't a DISability for me either. It's a Different-ability. Just because I don't do things the same way as non-Autistics, it doesn't mean I am 'less than', which is what all literature points to.
Hey Paul i agree Autism is not a super power for everyboody on the spectrum sometimes in certain areas i feel it can be like a super power, but in many areas it is not, so i agree with you on personal perspective. I like how you explain everything throughly , so we can understand your experience, as usual awesome video !!
Thank you Gemma, and of course its all about the personal perspective. I try to explain my points of give an example as I always want to offer as much perspective as I can on why I say the things I do, as in this case, it's how I feel.
It's fine for others to disagree, if it helps people get through their day then I can't agree with self promotion in that sense.
Hope you're feeling better
@@AdultwithAutism Hey Paul I’m feeling much better thank you. I am
About to email you with a video suggestion !!
I'm glad, good to hear.
I'll have a look out 👍🏻
Anxiety is the fuel that drives us and those of us who it’s very low energy
High functioning Anxiety. I'll take the good it gives, bit could leave the rest!
Some folks online - perhaps “privileged” people -, like to talk about autism as though it’s a super power because they likely haven’t experienced the brutally negative effects of being innately different than the majority of others in a dog eat dog world.
They’re mostly sheltered from the real world, and many autistic people end up believing that it is in fact a super power whilst not realising it is seen and felt by others as an actual disability, albeit an “invisible one”.
Sometimes I feel like autism is a super power, until I have to wear sunglasses at night or have a meltdown cos everything just sounds noisy and loud 😂😂😂
Thanks for the video Paul ❤
I think it's the experiences of the real world that's made me grumpy 😂
@@AdultwithAutism same here 😬
Have you read the comic Serious Engineering? The lead character is the most accurate depiction of autism I've read, particularly the road trip scene.
I haven't. I'll have to look out for it 👍🏻
Another good video, cheers. I can't help thinking how much you sound like Carl Pilkington though. Not that that's a bad thing
I get told that all the time, and I've been called much worse 😂
Thanks for this video and your channel I’ve been having a look around. This video is sort of where I’m at right now but hopeful. Great to hear your perspective thanks.
No problem at all 👍🏻
Funnily enough, I was going to mention this, in the comments, when I was watching the previous video. It drives me up the bloody wall
Still does for me too 👍🏻
HI Paul, I don’t like the superpower analogy either. I have had a few people ask what my “special gift” is. I think that comes from the media. No one does a special about people like me with autism. I appear to normal. I guess my knowledge of Star Trek may impress people😂. But of course that is because I have faithfully studied it for 55 years ha! I agree that only highlighting people with the most support needs marginalizes people like us. I have difficulties everyday but it is not apparent at work or out with the few friends I have. My partner is the lucky one who knows the real me!
Just made me think there, what would my 'superpower' actually be?! You know your Star Trek inside and out...I don't actually have anything that's detailed. I'm more of a give it a shot and roll with it type of person than a special interest...so I'm without Superpower? But...Autism IS a Superpower right? Oh no! Now I feel like rubbish. 😂
The amount of times I've been asked if I can count cards by people who learn I'm Autistic is unreal, it's the expected outcome these days. But I wish I could what a gift that would be!!
Or me they will depict the smiling idiot, or the robot, or lots of men or impossible feats in science and medicine I’m a creative Neurodiverse woman interested in the performing arts.
I’m rubbish at mathematics
There are those of us super highly intelligent and talented but don’t get the support I need
I understand that. I know I can do more at certain levels, but I need the assistance to get me to thay level. The problem is, it doesn't exist. It's tough.
Autism is a gift that comes at tremendous cost. We are the outliers that propel humanity forward. The first flint spear point was knapped by one of us. The first seeds were planted and nurtured by someone with autism. In ancient times, we were celebrated for our unique greatness. We were shamans and soothsayers. We were the Oracles in ancient Greece. When society practices grace, patience, love and forbearance towards everyone, including the outliers like us, they are rewarded in abundance. Let us continue the effort to bring society back to such a state so we can move forward together through the coming darkness, into the glorious light of the dawning of a new age; united in the myriad variations of one human condition.
People have said that to me before in different ways. It does make sense in a lot of ways. I mean, turn the news on...we're not responsible for any of it. Most of us want peace, calm, and contentment for all, as we know it would bring it to us too by default 👍🏻
We were shamans and soothsayers. We were the Oracles........why? I know....do you happen to know?
superpowers can emerge 'more visible' for NT when NNT are in their right situation and/or right timing. Inuit hunters seeing the only kill for the summer season, a pilot spotting the error in a deathdive to recover. These are reak live ex's.
There is a good reason why NNT are 3 times more prevalent in Inuit, at least I think.
I can summon more.
On the other side I would not be surprised a star like Christiano Ronaldo being NNT. I don't know that, but seeing him shooting balls so spot on, but so helplessly letting his father drink himself to death. Weird. It's an example which is not correct, just for getting your attention, but I want to state that supreme skills can be covering piles of horse shit.
Now I return back to what you said: "employers don't care", and I add they are shooting themselfes in their foots till this day and later.
The employers who don't pay attention to their Autistic employees are shooting themselves in the foot. In my case, I care, I want the best, I work hard, I want to fix everything that is broken...but some don't want you to have more initiative than they do. Or only see Autism as a disability and nothing more.
I despise it when people say autism is superpower. I absolutely 100% hate everything about my autism. It's not the autism I hate in itself, it's looking back on my life and see how it ruined everything. I lost relationships and friendships. I was smacked around by my mother because I was so different. My was bullied because I was different. I am 45. I am 100% alone. This crap is not a superpower, it's a horrible thing that ruins children childhood. I was diagnosed in my 40's and I was "supposed" to be happy to finally find out why I was different, but it just made my depression worse and worse.
I see things a little different these days. I see that the bullies, bad family members, poor employers, etc, are all people who were not Autistic...yet treated Autistic people badly. I absolutely get that our different wavelengths create difficulties through life, but we didn't respond the same way as they did. We're not the bad guys in our stories for the most part. We need to give ourselves a break, it's owed 👍🏻
I can understand why a lot of autistic people try to view their autism as having superpowers. Instead of always looking at the negative side of autism and all the deficits or what you wanna call them, they're trying to focus on the upside. I get that. Autism definitely has its pros, like being analytical, the ability to hyper-focus, become an expert on something, see through the BS, etc. (nevermind that I feel it doesn't amount to much 'cause you're up against a horde of sheeple who don't listen... but anyway). I've definitely read about everyday autistic people who have quite the 'superpowers' in my eyes. I think the crux of the issue is if we insist on portraying autism as one way or the other. Full on deficit disability vs divine gift of superpowers. The truth is more of a mosaic of both. For some, it's just a full on disability (or inability, whichever you prefer), and they may feel quite excluded by the idea that every autistic person has superpowers. So it's a bit of a tough subject. People wanna be positive and not feel pathologized, but at the same time, could you argue there's an element of internalized ableism in that? That unless the disorder/handicap/err, condition, whichever, has its redeeming qualities, you're just worthless or something. How about that in spite of having a debilitating condition, you still have worth as a person? The pressure to fit in and contribute to society is so huge that we desperately want to redeem ourselves in some way.. which may unfortunately just legitimize the ableist view that unless you can contribute to society in some capitalistic way, you're nothing. And that's not true.
I'm very proud to be Autistic and wouldn't change it. I agree focus should be put on positives as people who are just Autistic without other comorbidities which hinder them, can really excel.
When people generally praise Autistic people, it comes across very infantile. As if they didn't think we could ever be capable. Which is deeply insulting.
I don't socialise. "Why don't you join a group?". I don't do groups. When I look back on the socialising i did in my twenties and thirties I realise i didn't enjoy it then either but it was made bearable by alcohol. I don't drink now. Socialising is unbearable unless on a one-to-one with someone i know really well.
Alcohol was my social lubricant too.
I think the "autism superpower" thing came as part of the movement to show positive aspects of autism rather than just the clinical "disordered" side that you read in the DSM-V. I agree it has probably gone too far in the other direction though. The "superpower" comparison is a bit more apt if you think of X-Men (some abilities may have small upsides and significant downsides, ostracized from society in many cases, some can hide differences better than others) rather than a stereotypical superhero like Superman (universally liked, way overpowered, basically no negatives to his abilities).
Our environment plays a huge role in whether autism is more of a help or a hindrance. In a job where I can work from home doing interesting stuff with minimal social nonsense, I can work a 10 hour day on a really interesting problem, love every minute of it, and feel really happy and accomplished at the end. But put me in a sales position where I'm forced to talk to people all day and I guarantee I will be wishing I could just be normal like everyone else.
I agree with you there. If you want me to be productive, then home working all the way. I get to avoid the small talk, the socialising, the office 'banter', the politics...everything I have zero interest in.
The disorder has always confused me, as I'm the most correct person I know. I don't have acceptable failure, I don't avoid what can be controlled, everything has its place, and my routines are the foundation of minimal concern...yet I am supposed to have a disorder. There is no chaos here!
But I'll be Wolverine if I have to be any of the aforementioned. I'm already grumpy and sarcastic.
All I’ve ever experienced is trauma
I think education is not geared for neuro-divergent people. I wondered the same as you when it came to lessons in class...what was the point and when you questioned it you are chastised for it, but yet people can't figure out how to budget their money or basic living skills. I always get people asking me (bugging me) about not having children, that I'll regret it, I even went to my GP and said I wanted my tubes tied to avoid the chance of having children....his response was "What if future your husband wants children?" this was over 15yrs ago...still not married and still don't have children...I think I was pretty sure of my choice.
It's an unfortunate side effect of Autism, non Autistic people thinking they know better for you than you do, instead of asking to learn why you think they way you do. No kids always was and always will be the best decision I've ever made. I also don't want to be hit by a bus, but no one challenges that.
Superpower? I do have a freaky good memory, which means I remember all the bullying (& there was a LOT) & all the cringe I committed to deserve it! I know that's unreasonable on my part & that I should be mad at the adults who thought I could be bullied into being normal! Or better still, I should move on already, right?
Glad I found you! If I have to listen to 1 more cutesy 20-something with rainbow hair, who thinks they're here to save the world with their "superpowers".......🥵🥵🥵
Good point on the superpowers...what's the use of a good memory when it remembers all the bad times! I've done a video on Superpowers, not sure if you've seen it. But I think you'll resonate with it 👍🏻
I hate meetings in the workplace when I don’t need to be there
Same. It's not just 'going to the meeting' that's the stressor, it's all the traffic and interactions along the way. They burn me out before I get there.
@@AdultwithAutism and the ridiculous hours they held meetings before I was even awake in the mornings so thoughtless
Or held at 9am so you have to get caught in school run traffic when it's the worst time. Then you get there and the meeting doesn't start until half nine because everyone is making coffee and chatting. I'd have come at half nine if I'd have known.
@@AdultwithAutism my brain doesn’t wake up properly before 10 am anyway and that’s with multiple caffeine infusion and snacks after breakfast but damn they used to eye burn you in meetings for doing that to just try and stay awake. I had to give up full time office work due to that
I relate to that a lot. My brain doesn't come around to retain anything until noon. I make 4 hour road trips and have no recollection of them.
The drive and resilience to accomplish your goals is very humane. I’m not autistic and I have the same drive. However, my autistic son, memorize all the books he reads after reading them twice. I don’t care what you say; to me that’s SUPER POWER!!
You may not care what I say, but that wasn't the point of the video.
@@AdultwithAutism oh yeah, it was about highlighting your challenges & the fact that they seem to go un-noticed. The social challenges, the sensory challenges, the learning curve to speak, the food challenges. I live with all these every day! Sometimes I am soooo exhausted that I cry myself to sleep saying how much I hate autism. I know all about that. Despite of all the challenges, my son carries a beautiful purity in him that i don’t see in neuro-kids and this makes all struggles worth while.
When people say super powers they are referring to the areas over developed in autistic people ignoring all the challenges they go through. Most autistic kids have an over developed area.
Neurofeedback is really helpful with depression. Get your hands on it.
I'll have a look at Nuerofeedback. Never heard of it until now.
My best socializing happens when working a project with others. We are accomplishing something worthwhile. But gatherings like parties simply don’t thrill me.
Me neither 👍🏻
I think the big issue of this whole thing is personal perspective.
I can only understand my personal thoughts, I can't look into the mind of someone neurotypical. To me I am neurotypical.
So when this whole superpower talk comes in I can only look at myself, see what I can do and see where I am at.
I can do a lot of things, most of which are useless to the job market and others which might be useful are barred by nonsense such as the lack of ability to deal with surprising social situations.
I don't doubt that there are some autists which are lucky enough to possess interests in highly marketable areas such as stocks or medicine.
Its just not gonna be most of us and even then thats still ignoring the large amount of emotional scarring that we are likely to go through while undiagnosed or in shitty environments.
I only got my diagnosis after having dropped out of school thrice.
Before that I was in therapy for depression and childhood trauma which was going exactly nowhere because I couldn't open up due to not knowing whether it was appropriate.
Thankfully that therapist got me my autism diagnosis due to the extensive signs I gave off, otherwise I would still be tapping in the dark and despairing at my own incompetence despite my clear competence in many areas.
So far online autism stuff seems to be overrun by the usual suspects from the Identity politics crowd, so uhhh thats lovely.
You seem like a swell guy though.
I've been making content for over 2.5 years, there still isn't a single Autism Community who will accept me for having a different opinion. I've started wearing it like a badge of honour.
Autism is an individual difference, it is a shame this has never been at the forefront for them. I'm not after being offensive, but I also won't change who I am to fit in with them...as it should be a safe haven for us to be who we are.
For Autistic people who don't understand irony, this is a good example.
Paul, thank you for sharing, and of course being honest to the bone. My opinion is we are not meant to be in their world; we are creators of our world. The real world. Let’s honour that.
School: I felt broken, retarded; I was told I was brain damaged by people (they didn’t know any different), ups-and-downs. College: better, okay on doing things more freedom; yet no where to go, learnt things. Did another college, creative media, much better (I want to do filmmaking or something creative); people are still dicks, some people I bonded with, it was nice. University: HELL. Except a few moments I had learnt good things about myself and had profound moments of seeing something beautiful. I forfeited the course; very expensive.
Anyway, thank you for reading this, sorry Paul I talked too much.
Thank you for sharing
I can't socialize and don't see the point of it 98% of the time. Gimme someone on the same wavelength, with the same amount of skepticism and critical thinking, and I'm in heaven though. It's just very hard to come by.
Very true
I find the word suprrpower misleading, because even if someone has a skill they're exceptional at, they've lokely had to work at it all their lives to pefect it. I'm also registered blind and find the people patronising when they somehow find it amazing that I walk to and from the local shop, or whatever else I happen to do in daily life.
It's certainly misleading 👍🏻
Your the first person that's ever moaned more than me.
Maybe it's my 'superpower'...
My skills are reading and writing😊😊😊
Still searching for my skills 😂
Love this video very well said..💜
Thank you
I always thought the term "superpowers" meant the same as special interests and have used them interchangeably, but never quite felt comfortable with the term superpower, perhaps treating adult autistic people as children. Apparently some people see autism itself as a superpower, Amy Schumer, for instance. That seems an error in logic.
Special interests have been important for me since they provide balance, keep me from meltdown. I've known this since long before ever hearing the term "autism." I may seem exceptional in the areas of my special interests, but there is a reason for that. The reason is that, these are interests I've had since childhood that have never waned. Art is one for me, or more generally, creating things with my hands. I'm highly visual that that's probably specific to my autism. From grade school, if not before, I've practiced art. If you practice something (perhaps to the point of obsession) you are likely to become good at it, barring some barrier.
This may look exceptional or like a "superpower" but it's just a practiced skill. I have a few other special interests. I also may go on about these for too long in conversations, but have learned to curb that since people disapprove. People also don't like it if you are too good at anything, so masking learned in high school was hiding those things I was good at. Trying to look average, as you have noted.
A couple of my special interests are seen as odd by others since they don't fit my gender role, so hiding these was also a thing. If your special interest, e.g., cooking for women is gender-congruent, you might get high praise. Otherwise people, at some point, won't see it in a positive light. Being seen as average or even mediocre can become the safe route.
I agree with you that when we're generally good at something, just because we've practiced. And our interests don't lessen the better we get. We don't get distracted by anything else. Our interests are generally a place we want to be instead of everywhere else. Put it together and then see an Autistic person demonstrate a skill. They deserve praise but not for Autism being a superpower, but for the focus we have.
The national curiculum was only brought in in the 80s or 90s I think. Before that I'm people used to be tought ths more practical skills of life, as well as the academic stuff. I'm great academically and love intelectual things, but find the sitting in a classroom repeating the stuff the teacher just said really dull. I prefer libraries or researching at home, where there are minimal interruptions. I did have a great English teacher in years 7 and 8 and a great science teacher. In fact some of the books we read are ones I now love as an adult, but they have done something more constructive like have us read independently then write about the chapter or a chapter.
I'm a practical learner. Almost all other forms are twice as difficult 👍🏻
I have to ask, if you were with someone with autism for 6yrs and they never told you, do you believe that there would be a chance someone could get that person confused with narcissism instead of autism or do you believe there's way too big of a difference? Thanks so much ❤️
I don't. I think the difference between the two are like night and day. For example, if we have times of silence, it's because we enjoy it and if there is nothing to be said...then we tend not to fill dead air. Narcissists us silence as a weapon to make others feel like they have done something wrong. Or that I avoid a lot of social interaction because it wears me out...narcissists will use social interactions as a playground to manipulate others. I will explain how situations make me feel, narcissists focus on themselves before the situation and make out the situation is wrong...whereas I just let you know how it can impact me without emotion involved where I am the wronged party...
I could go on and on, but it is too much of a different condition. Although I do think it would be harder to spot if people are unfamiliar with both conditions.
Calling autism a superpower is trite and condescending and I would be very surprised if the idea originated with someone who actually has autism. Sounds to me like someone wants to minimize the challenges of autism with empty platitudes because they feel uncomfortable with the fact they don't understand them and they just wish they'd go away.
The only positive I can see in it is as a means to counteract the idea that autism is a 'disorder'. I hate that term, which is valid in only a minority of cases of people with autism. For most of us it's a difference, not a disorder, but it sure as heck isn't a superpower either!
I hate the disorder term also. I'm far from chaotic, I'm highly organised, more than most if not everyone I know. I require order as a necessity, disorder...absolutely not.
I understand the perspective of it being a throw away term for very young children, but nothing more. Sticking to the facts, even unpleasant ones will help them more become adults in a world not designed for us. Sugar coating leaves a tougher pill to swallow.
I dont know what you're talking about man after I was diagnosed, I could fly and lift mountains
Awesome! All I got was more sarcastic.
Late to this one, but no, autism is NOT a superpower for me either. Especially since I was only diagnosed this year (at 43), I definitely don’t look at my life and think, “Thank god for this!”
If it’s a superpower, it feels more like an X-Men-style mutation that has caused me to accidentally blow things up throughout my life and isolate me from…well…everyone.
I’m very glad I finally know about it. But this supposed “superpower” has not benefited me in any way so far 😒
Definitely. I like the X Men reference. It's like Cyclops before he was given his visor. The diagnosis is the visor, but it's a bit late once the damage is already done 👍🏻
Thanks for sharing
👍🏼
I agree
Maybe my 'superpower' is having a moan!
I see a comedic talent mate, stand up may be a choice
It was when I was younger, I think I'd be 'cancelled' today if I went back to it!
"Autism is a superpower" is intended to make those that are autistic to dig deep, past all the deficits, to find positive aspects of themselves. Autistic children struggle to find their place in neurotypical world, and if telling them that they possess a super power will help them in any way, it is in my view, worth it. By trying to discredit this, even if it a false belief, you are doing a major disservice to an autistic community as a whole. Try to identify your strengths and overlook your deficits, and suddenly, you might realize that you no longer need anxiety to fuel your life, but instead you can power it with passion and optimism.
Telling an autistic child they have a super power can theoretically help a child, yes... but it could also hurt them, right? What if they thought they could fly and jumped from a great height? We do take things literally sometimes. That's a rather obvious/easy example, but telling an autistic child, or autistic anyone, that they have a super power could give them unrealistic expectations? "Ya, I struggle with some things, but my super power will compensate for x, y and z". Well, maybe... for awhile? That is, if they are able to even find what their "super power" is...? Could that be a source of (more?) depression if the super power is never found or they're always searching? Still trying to figure out what mine is... pretty sure it's being that annoying person who's always playing devil's advocate and/or poking holes in things that didn't need my poking :)
Personally... if you want me (an autistic adult, who also used to be "just a child") to dig deep, just give it to me straight. Don't sugar coat it or "baby" me, because I can see right through that. Tell me autism CAN be a super power, but not that it always IS one... and I might buy that. Surely we can agree that what is (potentially) good for some, may be (potentially) detrimental to others? One size, or autism message, may not fit all? Even when the message is seemingly positive?
Thanks for sharing your opinion 👍🏻
I will defend that I'm not trying to do a disservice to Autism. Autistic children become Autistic adults, where nothing is available to assist or help whatsoever. The best way to prepare Autistic children for that is to be open, honest, and focus on life skills where they may struggle.
As I say, using that phrase is fine until around the age of eight, but then after that, people should aim to focus on practicalities for the Autistic persons sake.
It's okay to be different, I don't feel it needs sugar coating.
I agree with you there Nathan, reality over fantasy. Stick to the facts, focus the weaknesses for uplift instead of divierting attention, give care love and support, and you've more chance in helping the Autistic child become more acclimatised to being an Autistic adult for the world they need to live in 👍🏻
@@Ramagon98 There are two paths a child can take in life. On one hand, you can become on optimist and highlights good things in your life and minimize your deficits. On the other hand, you can become pessimist. You highlight the negatives and minimize or dismiss your strengths. These are two very different paths. Telling an autistic child that autism is a superpower is an attempt to push them toward optimistic path.
@@AdultwithAutism Life is hard, period. In my view, if we can sugar coat it to make things a bit easier, then it is worth it. There is a quote I have seen attributed to Einstein, that says "If you measure the skill of a fish by it's ability to climb trees, then fish will always be stupid." Autistics can't compare themselves to the neurotypicals, because of the differences. Yet, many do, including yourself.