Transgender Explained Badly? | Trans Guy Reacts
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- Опубликовано: 7 сен 2024
- Welcome to a new series where I (a trans guy) react and respond to various trans educational videos from all different perspectives. Up first is this animation called What is Transgender? Simply Explained.
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This instructional video is the physical manifestation of 'a bit confused, but got the spirit'.
😂 You're absolutely right.
that's what I was thinking "They're at least trying, and I applaud them for that."
I haven’t gotten there yet and my only thought is “instructional video? for what? being trans??”
@@arir.6564 instructions to understanding trans people I guess.
@@arir.6564 I think op meant "informational."
I'm not trans but I also felt uncomfortable when they removed Adam's clothing there as a "biological sex reveal" it just gives off very similar vibes to like people who ask trans people about their genitals like maybe we just don't do that huh
Agreed, Alexandra.
@JAB00Z Are you lost? Lmfao
@JAB00Z proof?
... literally no trans people say that, tho?
@leet man no one says that? - a trans person
I think the striping away part where they show the guy has a “female” body underneath is uncomfortable because a it isn’t always true and b it kind of implies trans people are just playing dress up but really they’re still their assigned sex at birth underneath the outfit. I found it pretty uncomfortable too. I know they’re just trying to give people a visual representation of their words but the implications of that visual are pretty not good.
Yes, exactly. It was like, what they said and what they showed were two separate things. Here's Adam. Adam is a man, but underneath his clothes he's female!
That and the fact they later distinguished between people who've socially transitioned, but either don't want to physically or just haven't done so yet, and those who've physically transitioned just makes it feel like "there's Trans ppl - and then there's 'real' Trans ppl" 😬
I'm sure that's not what they're trying to say, at least I hope not, but it's just way too close for comfort
Exactly!
It reminds me of transphobes saying "prove you're a woman/man! to transpeople, heavily implying that they have to strip in order to do that.
1000% agree, it feels like the visual representation of the perception that trans bodies are public information and that we are not entitled to privacy regarding our own genitals
At least they're trying
Putting a cross over the privates to represent Agender flies in the face of separating sex and gender.
Being Agender doesn't have anything to do with sex characteristics... Odd choice
I feel like with that, it's just about it being centered on the person, which happens to be the pelvic area. I don't know their intent though
@@scottdavie7057 I feel like it'd be different if they were like.. hand drawing this and it not be animated and such- I can get misplacing something, but also with their term of gender which was actually gender expression, I feel like they put it on their genitals to try to make their point, which.. didn't work out amazingly
spilt coffee on my gendern't
right??? like what do you think I look like under my clothes??? a video game npc??
did the character designers and animators not render my genitals into my 3d model? lmao
@@LilChuunosuke you heard it here first, folks: agender people look like barbie dolls underneath their clothes
People assume that gender lines on a strict linear scale, but actually from a non-linear, non-subjective viewpoint, it's more like a big ball of wibbly wobbly, gendery wendery... stuff.
Brilliant, Doctor Bice.
Also, the autism spectrum gets misunderstood in a similar way.
My trans, Doctor Who loving heart exploded :)
this made me smile :]
Possibly the best use of that quote I have seen lol
@AC lol, imagine thinking gender was real!
I really like the idea of this series. It's nice to see a trans person correcting and making sure everything is correct with trans education.
@@nefelh83 wat-
@@nefelh83 haha yes, one day our cult will rule the world. we will gain so much
@@nefelh83 yes we are in a cult even tho i am on Brazil we are in a all big mafia
@Truth is Always True true
Trans people are valid even without transitioning, thanks for being a good ally
@Truth is Always True aw, thanks for saying trans people are valid even without transitioning. We love our allies!
I’m a cis woman, and I felt uncomfortable with “those visuals”. Totally unnecessary.
Same.
It felt quite violating. We had already been told that Adam was AFAB, so there really was no need to show us whether or not he's physically transitioned. He's a man regardless of what his body looks like.
Yep, same here..
also, they didn't strip kayla to show that her agab (assigned gender at birth) and gender identity align. they only stripped adam, which felt kinda strange/gross to me.
@@whytho8856 cuz there was no need she is a cis women we know that
Reminder to everyone: you are valid! If you're worried about faking it, you're very very *very* likely not. You don't need surgery to be whatever gender you identify as, and the same goes for all identities! You don't need to be out and proud to be what you identify as. If you're a cishet who just likes watching Jamie, we thank you for being an ally! :)
Note for who doesn't know:
"Cishet" is someone that is cisgender (the opposite of trans) and hetero/straight (opposite of gay)
Cishet granny that loves watching Jamie
I love watching cishet granny watching Jamie
I NEED it to get passed. It doesnt help me at all to hear ”you don”t need it” when literally I need it so people could really see who I am and not seeing me as the wrong gender.
Cishet here, who loves watching Jamie's videos and getting informed.
I found the transexual part most uncomfortable. Not just that it's dated terminology but because transexual has become a hyper political term being used by TERFs and trans medicalists. Overall they tried hard though and I appreciate that. Also, would love to see this as a regular series from you Jamie. Great content!
I feel like this video was scripted by a person who semi-recently converted from being pretty 'classically conservative' to being trans-friendly. That's the vibe I'm getting. Nothing wrong with that of course, but they're likely using therms they're aware of to specify differences people who are in a similar position may question.
@@kazikek2674 Huh? Do you mean the video or the content?
@@tea-stems7835 I mean the video Jamie was discussing today
The aged terms and the way it is presented means it's likely a few years old (some people mention 'hearing it back in school') and it has that vibe of someone 'well I'm going to try and explain it to others who have the same mindset I had a short time ago', to me at least.
A lot of older trans people also use this terminology so I don't think it's inherently bad language changes overtime and everything
@@kazikek2674 Oh, ok. I thought you were talking about Jamie's commentary.
I give it an 8.5, they didn't separate presentation from identity, and used a dated term that has been used as a means of gatekeeping before. Other than that I'm actually really surprised at how well it was handled, and the pacing was good for the amount of info.
Gatekeeping? How so? Isn't it a good thing to express different concepts by different terms?
@@rosiefay7283 transsexual is a term pretty much only used by terfs and transmedicalists, there shouldn't be a separation between trans people who can't have or prefer not to have a medical transition due to this being exclusionary and implying that trans people who cannot have surgery or other treatment are less trans than trans people who can. It's not two completely seperate concepts, it comes down to preference and sometimes (sadly) to ability or inability to medically transition
@@rosiefay7283 Pumpkin Patch explained it very well in their reply. Separating Trans people by who can get medical treatment and who can't is gatekeeping, and harmful to the Trans community. There's so many limitations on getting help that all it does is break us down, and while the term still has some limited use it's adoption by those who only accept Trans people who physically change themselves is a huge mark against it.
Dysphoria manifests in two primary forms: Social and Physical
Transmedicalist and those inclined to use the term transexual tend to only focus on the physical aspect. Meaning they sometimes ignore people who don't experience enough physical Dysphoria, and ignoring somebody in pain because it's not the kind of pain you think is important is just wrong. It also cuts out some people who clearly should be under the Trans umbrella, like some Non-Binary people.
It's also among the distinctions that tend to cause people to feel the need to justify their Trans-ness. Medicalist rhetoric is part of why a lot of people end up asking if they're Trans enough to be part of the community, and it also tends to put focus on passing rather than on loving yourself. It's overall negative, and it's not something we should be bringing up outside the community as it's easily used against us by anti groups.
@@pumpkin_patched Thank you for the mention of those who can't go further with transition even when we may want to.
@@ebonyblack4563 ofc!! People who want to but can't are just as important in this conversation
"Hey spuds how's it going"
AJSNSMSJK THIS JUST MAKES MY DAY SO MUCH BETTER
I agree.
This is a series I wanted to try to do myself: not just on trans people, but explaining all corners of the LGBTQ+ community that I could, since I have friends of various orientations and genders and I'm gay myself. I don't think I could ever do it better than you, though, so I'm in complete support of this continuing!
same
Go for it! :)
This is a great idea
I really want one on the aspec. (asexual and aromantic spectrums)
Because there are even more misconceptions i feel, even within the lgbtqia+ community.
Do it, I'd watch it ❤️
The graphic "revealing" Adam's sex also made me uncomfortable. I think it's related to the obsession that a lot of people have with knowing what's "down there" or knowing what surgeries or procedures trans folks have had or will have. And then transphobes weaponizing that to say "you're not a real X because you have X anatomy".
@JAB00Z I think you are the one who needs to cope...
@JAB00Z yeah but you can't handle other people existing for some reason :/
Also it’s inherently dehumanizing in that it treats trans folk like a spectacle, or animals.
Would love to see a whole series on this, especially if you come up with a ranking system such as:
*Failure*
*You Tried* and
*Dr. Jamie's Seal of Approval!*
Jamie*
personally as an agender/genderfluid person the scale of "masculine to feminine", whether for gender or expression, was another little misstep. it's more like... a series of scales for each gender e.g. "masculine to anti-masculine" and you can have fluctuating or stable levels of each one.
also bothers me because it's perpetuating the idea of trans people having to over-perform their gender to be accepted.
My personal system utilizes a "color wheel", where let's say FEMME is "Blue" and MASC is "Red" and XENO/OTHER is "Yellow". Hue demarks core identity, with Shade (or both Saturation and Value) being modifiers upon the hue or hues present.
In light of this, there's a "Galaxy vortex" marble which was on display at the Corning Museum of Glass a few years ago that is literally the physical embodiment of my gender identity.
@leet man the entire point is that masculine and feminine aren't opposites, someone could easily be both, or neither
Gender is a higher dimension space (is how I like to explain it). Basically think of it as a bunch of sliders that can move from one side of a spectrum to another. Ie: Kai might like dresses quite a lot 95% but she/her prounouns quite little 15%. You could do this for everything to do with gender identity and gender expression in order to get a mostly complete understanding of a person's gender experience. However, there would be an incredible number of dials and the dials could shift over time. I think it helps to show how large the possibility space of human gender experience is rather then 1d or 2d representations that tend to focus a lot more on fem/both/neither/masculine. Also, theoretically if you add enough dials it would be inclusive of everyone's experience without having to delineate all of them explicitly. Of course you could never actually answer all of these questions nor could you fully construct a list of all of the questions but like a lot of thought experiments in math and science you don't have to grasp all of the details in order to gain understanding from it.
Yeah masculinity and femininity has nothing to do with gender, you know ur trans bc you have dysphoria and an inmate sense that you are the gender you know you are. Masc and fem are presentation, not gender. It always pisses me off when people act like it's the same thing because they're just enforcing gender roles but in a "progressive" way.
@@johndoe4110 dysphoria isn't a requirement to be trans either. People can just prefer to be referred to a certain way or whatever. I feel like the focus on dysphoria plays into the narrative that trans people have to justify their existence. I wish everyone could just be themselves. Maybe someday.
Edit: yes I totally agree with what you're saying though
It was a very strange decision to strip Adam to represent his AGAB, especially when the cis woman wasn't stripped to demonstrate that she was AFAB. The rest of the video is very good and includes important points, but I feel like that graphic in particular implies that it's possible/appropriate to uncover or reveal a trans person's AGAB, when that is a very private thing, especially to people who present androgynously.
It kind of links to the weird obsession with trans people's genitals, as if they are to be gawked at in a museum, while a cis person's are treated respectfully. They didn't necessarily intend this in the video, but it's what I read from it, and what someone learning might accidentally absorb.
wait whats agab? i know afab and amab but not that.
@@asei231 assigned gender at birth.
@@literally-no-one9587 ah- thanks! im enby and consider myself pretty educated but i didnt know that term
Good point that they felt it necessary to strip the trans man but not the cis woman.
@@literally-no-one9587 ngl i just read it as assigned gay at birth and then was like nope nope that can’t be right we didn’t talk about his sexual orientation and i don’t think it’s a thing
I have only just come out to myself as a trans woman at the age of thirty. Thank you for leading me towards acceptance of others, and paving the way for me to accept myself.
you got this! :) Sometimes it takes a bit of time to realize who you are, and that's okay
I hope your recognition and acceptance of this facet of yourself leads to happiness. Good luck going forward.
Much love! I didn't come out as a trans man until I was 32. Some of us take a while.❤🧡💛💚💙💜
Try not to be like me and burn with jealousy at your nephew who came out when he was 11.
Congrats! 💙💖🤍💖💙
- An Enby 💛🤍💜🖤
Congratulations! I hope you'll find happiness in your realisation of your true self💙
Gender and sexuality has been in my school's curriculum for a few years now, but the teachers never got to it in health class because nutrition and STIs were the main focus of the class and the class only lasts for a single marking period(2.5 months).
This year is the first year we might actually talk about it because it was a significant part of the pre-test for the class. But on the pre-test, the entire gender and sexuality section didn't have a single correct answer(multiple choice) to choose from. I could tell that what will be taught is coming from a good place, but most of it is only half-correct at best. I don't think anyone in the lgbtq+ community was consulted during the creation of the test.
I feel like I need to do something about this. I'm already in a group that's pushing to make sure the information being taught is correct, but I feel like I need to do something when the topic comes up in class.
leave suggestions in the replies please
I think a good place to start is just to chat to someone in the faculty about consulting people in the lgbtq+ community and perhaps even bringing in some people from queer charities/organisations to help with the classes.
I’d definitely go and talk to staff about it and give them the correct information if you are able to. I’d also recommend that when it does come up in the class that you, and whoever else is able to, help educate and correct the mistakes.
Hope it goes well!
Like the others have suggested talk to the teacher beforehand. I think that's better than correcting everything during the class. Hopefully the teacher will get it right after talking with you. If not you can still raise your hand during class, but I would use that as the last resort. Better to manage it beforehand if possible.
Make sure to say that you appreciate the effort and want to offer your help. I hope you can do it in a way that the teacher won't feel attacked or anything similar. I know that can happen easily with some teachers, but I'm sure you'll do your best.
Good luck.
I’d like to know what the answers were
Also probably show articles that use the proper information too! Just to be sure that you have sources (I'm sure you do, but school is like that with accurate info;;;)
i’m bigender (male and non-binary) but i was born as a female. i present femininely, i wear makeup and dresses and skirts and stuff so i’m glad to hear you talk about gender expression. also i can’t believe the video talked about being bigender :DD
@leet man Non-binary is an umbrella term for all genders that aren't male or female.
@leet man But it doesn't mean you have no gender, it just means you're anywhere outside the binary man or woman :D
@leet man you are mistaking non-binary for agender
I am curious. Gender is this (ridiculous) construct by society, which is determined through gender expression (e.g. clothing, pronouns, personality traits, physical appearance). So if somebody who is male but expresses herself willingly in "feminine" ways only, what is the point in being male then? How does one define gender then and how to know which gender(s) you are?
Or do i get it wrong and gender expression only means the optical appearance of a person?
Don't get me wrong, if somebody tells me they are xyz gender, then of course they are, i just can't make any sense of this usecase and would like to understand.
@@CatPianoMusic You're right that it's a societal construct, but it is not determined through expression. Sure, someone might look at someone presenting femininely and (wrongly) assume they are female, but that's just that - an assumption. Also, gender expression is not always purely visual, it can include, for example, voice modulation, as well as many other things, depending on the person, but one's expression can be changed purposefully, not so much your identity. Some people, such as myself, are genderfluid (we change genders), but we don't 'choose' to, it just happens. Generally people's pronouns don't change with expression.
Defining gender can be difficult, hence why there are questioning people, and people who haven't realised they're trans yet. It is rather difficult to explain how one 'feels' gender, even to other trans people, let alone to cis people who generally would never conciously feel anything to do with it, since they generally have always felt and been treated as the correct gender, and never experienced anything else.
ok at 6:44 i didn't expect them to mention bigender people. we usually get left out out of trans media and conversations so that was quite nice to hear 💖💖
Very true!
Yeah, stripping Adam naked is quite uncomfortable. In a way, it feels like playing into the thought that a trans person's body belongs to everyone, that others have a right to know what's going on underneath their clothes... It's quite unnecessary. They didn't strip the cis girl naked to show she's cis...
The only criticism I have in addition to what Jamie said: the video is somewhat specific to "Western" culture. Other cultures have different models and understandings of gender non-conforming people, such as the hijras of India, kathoey of Thailand, and two-spirit people in various Native American traditions.
also there's one in the original culture or Hawai'i, lemme look it up... its Māhū! They are a very important part of original Hawai'ian (Hawaiian?? i dont know- looked it up and it wasn't very clear which is correct) culture. When colonizers came they tried to erase that part of their culture, however, natives have still kept it alive! Btw, I am white so if anybody who is native to Hawai'i or just knows more than me about this, feel free to add on or correct me!
Would love to see some vids specifically exploring various cultures, espesh if Jamie can review videos by or interviewing variously gendered people.
Hi! Just a note, not even particularly about what you clarified,Gender nonconformity can mean a cisgender man, liking stereotypical feminine things, like dresses or makeup, or activities- I'm nonbinary and I got it confused a lot as well. I used to say I was gender nonconforming, when I really meant that I was non-binary, I just wasn't completely educated on the difference yet and saw it was used interchangeably. When I was little, for a while I was very very 'girly' and that matched my assigned identity- but I was still non-binary, I just wasn't gender nonconforming because I DID seemingly fit
@@Atan55555 Hi! Not to say you're wrong, you're totally right, but some people do use it as a part of their gender identity. For example, what's I typically call myself is a "nonbinary boy," but if I had been born five or so years earlier I might call myself "gender non-conforming" instead. I've also heard it used (again usually by people in their 20s and older) to just say something when a cis person asks, and the person doesn't want to go through the "complicated" parts of their gender (like when I tell cis people that I'm just a trans man)
@@Atan55555 what's the difference?
your voice is just so comforting I can’t-
My sex ed teacher used this definition of transgender/transsexual when I was in school (about 7 years ago) and I (the new girl who had barely said a word to anyone so far) told him that he was wrong and the term "transsexual" was outdated and gatekeep-y. Hopefully he took note so he wouldn't make the same mistake the following year. I think it was well-intentioned ignorance, like in this video, instead of him being an actual transmedicalist
yea honestly the only person i've heard use the term is one of my teachers who's lgbt+. i don't think she was coming from a negative place, i just think it was outdated terminology that she was more comfortable using (perhaps she grew up with it used).
Just remember that the "wrong" term is still used by some older individuals (mainly). I don't use it myself (I'm nonbinary), but just something to keep in mind.
@leet man nowhere in that comment did they say that their teacher was a bigot for this
Nothing wrong with being transmed
@@johndoe4110 I mean it’s transphobic so
11:28 What felt weird to me about this moment (5:22) is the boobs. If they'd left out the boobs, I would have felt a lot more comfortable with it. I mean, boobs aren't really a really big afab thing the way I see it. I mean, whether he's had surgery, hormone blockers, and his age could all influence whether he has them. They're not an inherent thing afab people are born with - they develop with age, and can be prevented. It just feels like it's making a lot more assumptions than a uterus, ovaries, et cetera.
I’m so glad channels like this exist or I’d probably end up like my parents, today at dinner my dad was making loads of offensive “jokes” about things like apparently you can’t wear dresses and like unicorns but still be male and then when I confronted him (no one else in the family did) he said that he was trying his best to be a modern man and be gender-fluid and then I just laughed at him because he was acting as if he knew it all and would never be anything other than a cisgender straight man and then goes on to describe himself as gender-fluid thinking that it means to be accepting of everyone’s gender 😂
I like the idea of new series to keep things fresh. People still use "transsexual" where I live (Germany), and I hate it because to me it implies a link between sexual orientation and gender identity that just doesn't exist and feeds into ridiculous TERF rhetoric like "autogynephilia".
Yeah it's still transsexual in Italy, my home country, as well. Speaking with my family it always makes me uncomfortable when they talk about "transsexuality" and the like so I try to get them to just say trans. I really don't like it at all.
Yeah my family still says it and I live in England so that's sad
I guess that we still use "transsexuell" comes from the lack of distinction between sex and gender.
Wobei man selbst dann "transgeschlechtlich" sagen könnte um klarzustellen, dass es nichts mit sexueller Orientierung zu tun hat.
I don't think it's meant to imply a connection there, it's just an outdated use of "sexual". It used to be used to mean to do with sex, like physical sex - the characteristic, not just to do with sex - the act. Like bisexual used to mean intersex, or unisex, or hermaphroditic; relating to both sexes. I believe it was first used to talk about plants. So before the concept of gender was mainstream, and while "sexual" still had this old meaning, there came the word "transsexual" for people who transitioned from one sex to another.
Yeah, there isn't really a distinction between sex and gender in German. And saying "Transgender" still sounds a bit unfamiliar in German. But I personally think it can still be used. I mean, the German language adopted the term "sex" (for the activity) from Englisch in the 20th century (!) , so it's actually quite new. And we also accepted at least the concept of the word "sexuality" for Heterosexualität, Homosexualität ect. . So I think it wouldn't be that wild to just "catch up" with the evolution of the English terms and just adopt the other definition of Sex and the word Gender. The German scientific literature already uses the terms anyway. And because of that I deliberatly pronounce the "Gender" in German sentences in a German way to indicate that I see it as a German word, like in "Oh ja, er ist ein Transgendermann". But the word transgender doesn't really work well as an adjective. "Er ist transgender". It's not really how German language works. You can't really modify Gender that good, not even in English. Like you can modify sex into sexual or sexy ect. ., but gendery, genderal, genderish? Not really.
I'm not trans but I personally feel that we need some sort of standardised dictionary of all LGBTQ+ terms and exactly what they mean so that people don't get confused when they're educating themselves
i think there's a wiki! also i agree because there's a lot and i consider myself pretty well educated on most terms but even now i see some flags and am like "wait hol up which one is that again?"
I feel like a problem with the wiki condensing the terms is that both the language around the terms is still forming, and the way those definitions are presented will often make a relative rookie go 'what's the difference' on several of them. (Usually some nonbinary gender terms and omni/pan/polysexual)
Yes, absolutely, I often find it frustrating when people get in an argument over bi/pan and then realise the core of the disagreement is them not having the same definitions for the two
But like others have already said, the language is still forming and I'm sure people will be using different terms five or ten years from now, and some of the ones we use today will be seen as offensive
@@kazikek2674 thats fair- im omni and JUST learned that bisexual is like nonbinary, where its both an orientation/identity and also an umbrella.
@@kazikek2674 any idiot should be able to tell the difference between the different multisexual sexualities bisexual is attraction to at least 2 genders often with a preference pansexual is attraction to people regardless of gender omnisexual is the attraction to all genders but usually with a preference and polysexual is the attraction to more than 2 genders but not all
You are deserving of love, of people who care and to be treated right and you should never have to question that. You are valid unique and amazing. Keep being your incredible self, and don't change yourself for the sake of others.
Awwwww :)
Thank you..
I really appreciate your comment
I honestly needed someone to tell me that today. Thank you.
8:30
My two cents to the transsexual bit. When looking up transsexual the main definition from google (that I got) was basically 'a transgender person that undergoes medical treatment', however as healthline puts it, while transsexual is still used in the medical field a lot, it is recognized that it isn't the most inclusive word to use, and as many transgender individuals see it as stigmatizing and associate it with the time where "transsexuals were mentally ill perverts and sexual deviants", it should never be used unless someone has a preference for that word over transgender.
I totally agree that while that video was not quite perfect, hey at least they were trying. Which is a refreshing change.
There was a time when I used to get confused between trans and intersex people 😅
There was a time i didnt think i was lgbtq+... man was i wrong as FUCK. im non-binary and omnisexual lol.. very very wrong
there was a time when i didnt know much about the lgbtq+ and me and my freinds were talking about sexuality and i said i was 'normal' 💀
@@kaiisaroach5674 by your nametag and pfp alone,, hello fellow gay.
@@kaiisaroach5674 well, you weren't wrong...
@@asei231 lmao, hello
I would love to see a video responding to Kathleen Stock. The furore at Sussex Uni, her position with anti-trans LGB alliance, her book Material Girls, her several recent Daily Mail articles since resigning and her new position at the unaccredited, 'truth seeking' University of Austin - all an absolute shit show. The Material Girls book contains thinly disguised bigotry, but it's nestled within some (seemingly) more moderate, reasonable arguments. I would love to hear what you have to say about it.
Seconded
Wow we could really dig deep into that...
Thirded!
Yeah omg, one of my friends was about to read it, the name gave me a read flag and I searched it up and it was very overtly terfy. Me and my other friend had to try very hard to make her understand and not fall down the terf pipeline, like Jesus
Hey Jammi I love your videos lol- they make me happy! I came out to my mum as trans and she’s accepting but kinda confused! Not gonna lie your videos have me the confidence to come out! Thank you!
Maybe show your mom his videos to help her.
The gender= gender identity thing really bugs me. I'm autistic, so social rules (and therefore gender presentation) is arbitrary to me.
Why is a robe/toga masculine but dresses are feminine? Because that's how it is. Why are bright colors and glitter feminine? Because that's how it is. Why is hating dirt and being wet feminine? Because that's how it is. Why do people spread colored goop on their face, and why is that feminine? Because that's how it is. Why is long hair feminine? Because that's how it is. Why are flowers and nice smells feminine? Because that's how it is.
Well, I hated dirt and bad smells, I hated pants(trousers), I liked looking at shiny/colorful things, and I had girly private-parts... Therefore I was a girl. I had to tolerate getting prettied-up for family events, I had to like long hair, I had to learn how makeup/nail polish worked (even if I hated the smell of polish or the feel of colored crap on my face). It's was just how it was.
But my little brother didn't mind dresses, and he definitely liked shiny things. So why was I a girl and he a boy? Maybe I should dress like a boy- I wanted to be called a boy after all. But I was still a girl, even when I went out of my way to do boy-things! It was stupid that I could do all the boy-things but I got called a girl because I had to sit to pee.
When I figured out that acting like a boy wouldn't get me treated like a boy, I decided I might as well wear skirts at home because they were comfy. And comfy things are is not a factor in outside-clothes, or else everyone would wear PJ's outside. So I let my parents decide what to wear outside, because it was all for other people anyway. They decided I looked best in girl-clothes so I wore that.
And because I looked best in girl-clothes and everyone called me a girl, and I didn't _loathe_ being called a girl, and I wasn't being fully authentic when acting like a boy, I was therefore a girl. Because if I were trans, I would've _insisted_ on wearing boys clothes. I would've acted like a boy naturally. And I wouldn't be trying _so hard_ to be a girl. And I wouldn't be angry at the mirror for showing me what looked like a middle-aged man in drag.
And if I were trans, I would act like a boy, wouldn't I? I would like sports and cars and dirt and would hate skirts. I wouldn't have to have _tried_ to be a boy. I make it sound like I saw the contradiction between "I was trying so hard to be a boy therefore I'm not a boy" and "I'm trying so hard to be a girl and therefore I'm a girl", but I didn't see the contradiction at the time.
Basically what I'm trying to say is: the gender= gender expression thing really messed with me growing up. It's a decent shorthand for cishets because we trans people tend to bend over backwards to make ourselves look like the gender we want people to see us as. However, when coming at it from the inside, it's not nearly as helpful because you don't really get that presentation can often be a performance for the cishets in order to be gendered correctly. And even for the cis, it gives them the idea that trans people have to be gender conforming to their gender or else they aren't that gender. Nevermind that cis women are allowed to be GNC and still be seen as women. Cis men can't do that, and trans people can't do that and I hate it.
I'm secretly a bit jealous of trans women because when I try to look masc, people see a lesbian- It doesn't occur to them that I want he/him pronouns, but when AMAB's femme it up, cis people are clued in that maybe the trans girl wants to have she/her pronouns used. Don't get me wrong, it stinks that trans women have to worry about violence way more than I do, so I really shouldn't be jealous, but still... I want people to use the right pronouns even if I don't pass.
The look on your face when they stripped Adam down. Thanks for the most genuine laughter I’ve had all week. :D
11:31 As someone who's FtN (female to non binary/neutral) I also didn't like it... made me a little uncomfortable as well...
Couldn't you just say AFAB non binary making your explanation unnecessary?
@@theemofemboycatgirlw3214 I used and explained it because it's not used really often and I want to make it more commonly used ^-^
@@tami7992 oh OK
Jamie is such a good model for how to correct misconceptions and address ignorance in a respectful and helpful way 👏
I really like this new series. I'd love to see more and I think it could help a lot of people to dispell misconceptions for recently out trans folk, closeted, out for a while or even just allies. Tysm for making this. I think this series could really help me explain stuff to friends and family.
I'll be watching you pine tree
"Think of a linear scale" Jamie makes the exact face I'm making...
A linear scale would not reflect my own gender identity accurately, for example. I’m a lot more strongly nonmasculine than I am feminine (even though I present as extremely feminine).
Hey Jamie, would you at all be interested at looking for/at Intersex content? It's a part of the LGBTQ+ that really doesn't get any attention and I think it's a really fascinating subject to talk about.
Oh man thats a GREAT idea! im not intersex myself but i would love to learn more as i cant find much on the topic.
Yes please this is one of the most suppressed areas in our culture.
I would really appreciate this! I know very little about intersex people so I would benefit a lot from some content on this.
It would be great for Jamie to use his platform to lift up the voices of intersex people! That said, there are really great videos on the topic by people who are intersex themselves! I highly recommend looking them up ❤
@@DjurslandsEfterskole I agree! While it is great for allies to speak up on behalf of a community or group, it's really awesome to get information from within that community. Are there any creators and/or videos you would recommend?
The vibe that I get form this video is that, a group of cis people came together to make this video for other cis people to help explain this subject. Did a bunch of research online, but didn't actually talk to any trans people to confirm some of the things they said. That's the vibe I get. Like you said, good intentions, not very accurate sometimes.
I love Jamie for actually educating others about being transgender and actually cares to explain fir people who just struggle to understand and doesn’t judge them for it. Of course not every trans person is obligated to do so, but to be mad for someone just misunderstanding or saying certain things wrong is pretty unnecessary
Of course, if someone is being downright disrespectful due to someone being trans is a different thing since then they have crossed the line and it isn’t with the intention to learn, but to hurt. In that case you should be mad and stand your ground.
This is kind of tangential but I think that there are different questions appropriate to ask different people. Like say you're the cis person in the situation, and you get upset at the transgender person and try to ruin their life, two weeks after that isn't an appropriate time, and you will probably never be the appropriate person, to ask them, "why don't you want to be an [AGAB]?" but that question could be appropriate from a close friend, especially if they're questioning their own identity. And probably don't ask any transgender questions in a crowd of people, unless that crowd is there specifically for transgender education.
i remember watching this video in primary school and despite some things being wrong with it i am very glad that my school made sure to find an at least partially correct video to educate younger kids and i am glad that i got to watch jamies video to understand it better as a cis person! thank you!
I'm not going to drill you for your exact age, but that means this is, in essence, at least a couple years old, yes?
@@kazikek2674 oh ye this is quite a while ago lol
I really appreciate being given the correct language to use when explaining myself to my family. I want them to understand me and accept this aspect of my identity.
While I was watching this, my cat kept trying to pick the screen whenever she saw your face, and I thought it was adorable when she did that.
Nice video btw I love watching your videos 😊
You sure she wasn't trying to kill Jamie?
@@tatiana4050 yeah, she starts biting my i-pad when she attacks
The video got like 75% right. They ticked so many good boxes, but also raised big red flags. As a nonbinary person, their explanation of gender would have confused me and led me astray.
YESS ✨✨do more please! it´s so important to hear trans people talking about their experiences. Being an ally is about listening to people in order to understand them better, not about guessing and getting offended if corrected. Also you are so kind and cool
That video was very embarrassing lol I literally remember that video being shown at our school and me including some other people got very mad because it wasn't explained properly
Exactly 👍👍 I was always a trans woman regardless of the fact that I was in the closet til 30 n was not yet expressing it. I feel like that video was someone having had the topic explained to them n then trying to recite it from memory rather than reading a script sculpted by someone who knows what they r talking sbout.
As for the terms transsexual, I still use it sometimes to specify if someone has undergone bottom surgery when it's necessary to have the distinction. I feel that many within the community have a bias toward it because people outside the community would get confused n think it has to do with sexual orientation sexual organs.
I loved this video! I think making this a series is an amazing idea because so many people out there are willing to learn but they don't know where to start, this being a series would be really helpful I think 😁
Hey if you don’t mind me asking, what is the flag on the left of your profile picture supposed to represent?
@@grahamrich9956 That's the gender fluid flag :)
@@probably_noah9417 ok cool, thanks!
I feel so grateful for finding this channel, I can see now how I really need to educate myself more about so many aspects of the LGBTQ+ community... I'm working on becoming a better trans ally and these videos are helping a lot (Jamie is literally the sweetest guy ever)
We were taught using this last week and i just wanted to shout at my teacher for saying trans people who have had surgery are transsexuals. it was very uncomfortable!
@JAB00Z thank you
Cute pfp, how did you made it? It looks amazing
Beautiful pfp!
Love the pfp, is that pic crew or did you draw it? (If it is pic crew, link?)
@@evansgardens ye it is picrew but it was so long ago i can’t remember how i got to it
I like this series a lot, and I hope you keep making more! It’s helping me understand more about the exact meaning of what it is to be transgender (that sounded weird but I couldn’t find a better way to phrase it).
Also, you describing the differences between gender and sex and (especially) gender EXPRESSION was MASSIVELY helpful to me. I’m currently identifying as a cis woman, but am heavily questioning it, and learning more about it really helps! Thank you so much.
Your videos are so chill and fun and I always like tuning in to either start my day or take a break from busy college stuff! Keep it up homie
Maybe it depends on the country whether "transsexual" is still used. Germany, for example, still has the "transsexual law", and politicians used that term during the last election. But among us affected, "transgender" is definitely more favorable. Also, a lot of older queer folk might prefer the former for themselves. Personally I feel that "transsexual" again puts too much focus on what's in someone's pants. Like how there was a push almost two decades ago here, where gay men preferred the term "gay" over "homosexual", because the latter seemingly focused too much on the sex part.
It comes down to personal preference, as most things do, I guess.
7:39 So Kayla didn't know what a transgender person is. But she knows the terms "Hormone Therapy" and "Gender Reassignment Surgery".
"We love Keyla :D"
Idk why but that was cute to hear
It was cute to see him excited about a positive video
I kinda got happier too 😄
As a non binary who uses the term trans I really love that they include nb identities under the trans umbrella!!
Me too
Same!
I like this series. Personally, as a trans ally, this made me notice that I also got my definition of gender a bit wrong. I already knew that I had the concepts of gender identity and expression a bit mixed up but your explanation did help clear it up a whole lot. Thanks Jamie!
Gonna love how they completely forgot that nonbinary people exist.
Except they mentioned it in the video, they just didn't refer to it as nonbinary
Relevant to trans education, I once watched a short film here on RUclips where Jamie's channel *was* the education for a young trans person. It made me chuckle because this channel has also been the bulk of my trans education, especially for all the questions I'm too shy to ask my one trans acquaintance. The movie was called "Pronoms" (it's in French with English subtitles) posted by Elora Bertrand.
Yea, that graphic was weird. It gets the point across, I guess, especially with their conflation of gender expression and gender identity. But really? Did Adam look like that before? What are you implying? What is the reaction you want to invoke? It's a bit icky seeing it like that.
Suddenly: Transsexual. Yikes. Transgender has far less baggage.
Still, rather good video. A place to start, but not one where to stop.
As a cis gender gay male that is trying to learn about the trans community, I thought it was very good at explaining. It could have went into more detail, but it was simple enough that this could be shown to children.
I love your videos.
Jamie, you are not alone in feeling weird about that graphic! My reaction comes from a few places:
1. Our bodies are hypersexualized as trans people. People thinking it's a-okay to just ask a stranger about their genitals is not going to disappear with a graphic like that!
2. The graphic is demonstrating that the only thing making Adam trans is his presentation, as though if someone removed our clothes, our "secret" would be revealed.
3. Many of us don't actually have bodies that look like that anymore, at least in one way or another.
4. It's just a blatant reminder of dysphoria. Like... I don't need that doodle to remind me of that stuff, ya know?
I don't think any of this was the intention of the video's creator and this was the impact it had on me as a trans man. I hope they are able to learn from your critique and can edit the video, because it's otherwise really great!
Also, interesting that they defined gender as gender expression and then differentiated between transgender and transsexual as having medically transitioned. This is transmedicalism at it's core. So, that's actually pretty concerning now that I think about it.
It is strange that despite itself it plays into the three of the most harmful stereotypes: trans people need their genitalia shown to determine their transition, masculinity and femininity are opposite parts of a spectrum, and that there is a meaningful difference between trans people who don’t get gender reassignment therapy and those that do. The only real conversation now is how much is outdated terminology and how much is bad beliefs. It’s very clear that it is meant to be trans-inclusive and trans-positive but it basically fell into bad tropes.
You explaining how gender identity and gender expression are separate things was SO helpful to me. I've been trying to figure out some things about myself, and knowing those two things don't have to be the same just might be the key.
This video was presented to my form class a couple weeks ago and me being the only trans person in the class was very embarrassed and ashamed of how a lot of the things in the video portrayed Adam’s body and the transexual being different to transgender. Now all of my class believes that me identifying as a transgender boy says to everyone that I am a female and I always play to have a female body because I don’t identify as transexual.I do plan to have all physical changes possible to present as a man instead of what looks like a buff lesbian. All good wishes to all trans people that Amy be struggling at the moment
Yay! Jamie this was wonderful to see, I feel like this type of compassionate correction of trans education is much needed.
I love this video! I think this theme for a new series is a great idea! There's a lot of opportunity to learn more about what it means to be trans and learn how to explain it better. I'm cis so I don't have any personal experience so I find this really useful and interesting.
I recently took a training for work regarding serving trans clients, and I was really excited that I was able to add to the discussion in a positive way, and I feel like your channel has a lot to do with that! Gender expression versus gender identity was a whole segment in the training, which was awesome for clearing up people's confusion (the training was given by two trans people which helped). Thank you for your videos!
Confusing gender expression with gender identity is dangerous fuel for the transphobic rhetoric that girls that like "masculine" things or boys that like "feminine" things will be swept off to gender reassignment programs.
It is very important to distinguish the two!
I´m saving this video to show some people. I think that with your commentary Jamie, this is has now become a good educational resource. They should hire you to consult next time.
You said pretty much everything, I suppose as a non binary person it would've been nice if they mentioned the possibility if being a singular gender somewhere outside or between feminine and masculine. Over all a really good video
Love this video, Jamie! I loved the moment at the beginning when it said "Meet Kayla" and you said "Hi Kayla," haha. And as a transmasc person, yes very uncomfortable for me 'undressing' Adam at 5:40
I really didn’t like how they said gender fell on a linear scale, wether you’re talking about gender identity or gender expression, that is incorrect. I don’t think you can express gender on any kind of graph. You can get a rough idea, but it wont be accurate for everyone. I’m non-binary and personally, I’m not “in the middle” of male/masculine and female/feminine. I’m outside of how gender can be expressed in a simple graph.
Honestly? I think this video (the one you react to) is a really good STARTING point for people who want to learn abt trans issues/trans people. It’s simple, positive, and correct on what I think are the most important parts (you don’t need to medically transition to be trans, ‘trans’ isn’t a third gender, trans people are people and deserve to be treated well, intersex and nonbinary people exist and are valid, that sort of thing). To me, the stuff it gets wrong, while it should definitely be corrected, still gives a good base for people to jump off of; once you can accept that trans people are real and valid, you and pretty quickly figure out that gender isn’t gender expression. But you’ll never get that far if you don’t see us as people.
Hopefully my wording makes sense lmao but basically I think the video you reacted to is a pretty okay starting point for people :D
Totally make this a series! I know I'll be excited when new episodes come out. Though that's pretty much how I feel whenever you show up on my homepage anyway. :D
Considering how much I didn't understand about sexuality growing up, I welcome the open discussions about this. Even with an open and compassionate mindset a lack of information can lead to misunderstandings and hurtful behaviours and attitudes. Thanks for this!
I'm pretty sure the whole masculine/feminine thing isn't a language barrier. I keep seeing a frustrating amount of people confuse gender identity for expression.
So my mum just glanced at this video as I was watching it and said "Harry Potter?" :D Great video as always!
Personally (as a trans woman) I don't think the video was that bad
The vocabulary use was sometimes out of place or outdated (e.g. with "masculine", "feminine" and "transsexual")
but I don't think the people behind the video were using those terms or making any of their mistakes on purpose
The video spreads a nice message about how we need to learn to understand and appreciate trans folks, and it provides a (while not always fully correct) simple to understand explanation.
This channel has helped me so much to understand trans people including someone in my life, and at this point, I'm watching you for entertainment and eventually I get to find out something new. Thanks for the education, King. 👑
6:45 wow! My identity never usually gets mentioned in videos like this, that's definitely a green flag for me
a few seconds later they mentioned agender (unless I'm getting the timing wrong. I think your timestamp was bigender), happy about that myself.
Defining presentation when attempting to define gender was still cringe though.
@@Toni-lo9ms I'm agender too and did a happy lil dance lol
I'm also a little uncomfortable with the idea of the scale between masculinity and feminity, you could be entirely out of the binary instead of being somewhere between man and woman?
@@lre863 I mean, yeah. I didn't bring that up but connecting to a gender at all is kind of alien to me. I'm a rational person so I'm not going to try to deny the overwhelming number of people who say that's a thing but I've never felt it personally. In between isn't the only way to be non-binary and for a lot of the video they acted like it was. (Not Jamie obv)
@@Toni-lo9ms Definitely. One thing I worry about with videos like this is when they get one thing wrong the people who use it to learn are eventually gonna be corrected
And then they're gonna wonder if the rest of the video can be trusted even though most of it is right
@@Toni-lo9ms OMG YES
I just can't comprehend the idea of feeling connected to a gender
Honestly for a very long time the idea of being trans was something I couldn't understand because I didn't think anybody felt a connection to the words "man" or "woman" beyond just their ASAB
I’m looking forward to seeing a video reviewed on here that is 100% accurate and easy to follow so I can use it to help explain to my family about why some of my friends have recently come out a trans. Thanks for doing this series, I’m an ally but sometimes I feel like I don’t understand everything so having informative videos reviewed is going to be super helpful me and many other people to understand more. Thanks!
It would be very interesting to see the comments on this video. I hope the viewers tried to correct them on the gender expression/gender identity misconception!
Also in Sweden you have to get a diagnosis called "transsexualism" (ugh😒) to be able to get certain treatments and even though it's really outdated and annoying, I do understand why people would bring it up
I was going to say towards the beginning that it was using older version of the definitions and it was confirmed when transsexual came up. Back before I started transitioning in the US depending on the state you were in you had to have x amount of years of therapy before you could start hormone therapy etc. and one of the major things was if at any time during your years of therapy you went out expressed as your AGAB then your therapist could kill your transition or require you to have another x years of therapy. So gender and gender expression were considered if not the same but ridiculously linked
Hi! I've had a tough week and your videos always make me feel better
This was really helpful! I'm transmasc and NB, and I also organize "discussions" with various groups of people to help them understand and address their questions. You're giving me new perspective, and ideas for material to cover. Thank you, I hope you do more of those!
4:32 I wouldn't say they're not linked. They are normally related somewhat, often closely related, but they're definitely not the same thing and they're not related for everyone. I'd say there's a correlation though.
Edit: 4:42 Your gender presentation does not impact your gender identity, but your gender identity will often impact your gender expression. And this is purely anecdotal, but I've often found this to be more so with the trans people I know of, I'd guess because they want to use gender expression to be seen as the gender they are.
Love your reaction to these kinds of things! Also, can't wait for our first members video
Thank you! First livestream will be very soon :D
idk, i feel like even if they changed that bit on gender to being about gender expression it still would've been iffy. As a genderfluid person, i can assure you that the genders I feel and the ways i express them are very much not a linerar slider.
The fact that they included Pangender just... :D I know it wasn't great in parts, but it still makes me happy beyond words to see myself represented like that, as most people aren't aware Pangender is a thing.
They just needed to add gender fluid, and then they’d be a 10/10 for inclusivity. Still a good video, and an excellent reaction from Jamie
I quite like the idea of this series, this first video was very good! I also think nitpicking is important, it doesn't take long for a small seemingly unimpotant error to snowball into a problem!
Looking handsome as always, lots of love from your Indian subscriber 🇮🇳, yay new series
What an amazing idea for a series, Jamie!!! I would have loved to see something like this, back when I thought I was cis and a close friend came out as trans. It took me some time to grasp the idea and meaning, and although I'm currently struggling with my gender identity, I'm on the process of educating my mother on gender identity. I'm quite bad at explaining things, so this looks like a really helpful series^^
Thank you for your hard work!!
is it weird to anyone else that they didn't say nonbinary but listed less common identities? like yes please represent those but also... nonbinary is a really common term and if it's not included it's kinda weird
What I found a bit weird is the model of gender being on a one-dimensional scale (from female to male), when the agender axis should clearly be perpendicular to that, because where you are on the gender direction axis has no influence on how much you experience gender at all.
One time there was a select your gender/sex and it was “F or M” as an intersex agender person I picked “or”
Hi Jamie, I really like this new series! Looking forward to seeing more of them. Really helps to see different ways of explaining / talking about this, including seeing ways to get it wrong and how to do better. A few notes on things that caught my attention:
1) As an American (a NYer), I would agree with you about the masculinity/femininity thing. I don't think this is a matter of differing Englishes. It's just wrong, and misleading.
Case in point: I've never been a particularly masculine man, by almost any definition. I don't like stereotypically masculine hobbies or interests, e.g. sports; I'm not macho in how I present myself & interact with people; I'm not muscular or athletic; I don't have facial hair...
But, I am still perceived as a man, and thought of myself as a man for most of my life until coming out as nonbinary last year. For me, being a "man" is less about expression or stereotypical interests or whatever, and more about a role in society, a place in a category. If all the men are at one table, and the women are at another, which group do you place yourself into, and which group do others place you into? What are the ideals associated with a particular gender, e.g. how to be a good man, a good husband, a good brother, a good son, as compared to being a good person, a good partner, a good sibling, a good child? Societal assumptions of interconnection or responsibility - that all men are responsible for all other men, or representative of how men are in general, or things like this. ... All of that is about who you are relative to others - a good husband to your wife, a good wife to your husband; one of the men in the room vs. being one of the women in the room - a very different set of things from masculine or feminine expression.
2) Maybe this is a nitpick, and I do see why the video chose to do things the way they did, but at the very end instead of "Kayla now understands that being transgender doesn't follow the current status quo, but that's okay," I wish they might have said something like "Kayla now understands that being transgender is part of the status quo, that transphobia is no longer status quo, and so Adam and others need help to continue to push back against misinformation, transphobia, etc., to keep those things to the margins and uphold the new inclusive and accepting status quo."
3) Under the umbrella of trans identities, when discussing bigender, andgender(? haven't heard of that one before), and agender, I was really surprised they didn't mention the word nonbinary. It's literally the umbrella term for all people, of all different labels and terminologies, who fall outside of the binary... would have been easier to explain than these multiple different identities with their (accurate?) gender symbols...
Anyway. Thanks again for doing this. Looking forward to the next one.
Oh, and the cringy use of the word transexual, of course. I don't think I know anyone under the age of 50 who uses that word anymore.
It's not 'andgender' it's 'pangender' as in 'pan' being all.