WHAT IS HAPPENING TO MY MIND IN MY FAMILY?" | Mental Tricks & Defenses | Psychotherapy Crash Course
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- Опубликовано: 16 июл 2024
- #trauma #FAMILY
#tamarahilllpc
Sometimes it is difficult to understand family who triangulate, manipulate, and intentionally attempt to harm other family members. Because of this you may engage in a variety of "defense mechanisms" or "mental tricks" to help you either deny what is going on or cope with things. Sometimes it's just too painful and you may decide having a life of your own isn't possible.
You may find yourself asking "what is happening to my mind in my family?"
In this video, I discuss what you may be experiencing as you try to piece together what is actually going on in your triangulating family.
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DISCUSSED IN THIS VIDEO:
0:00 intro
1:57 cognitive dissonance
2:55 post-decisional dissonance
7:45 COGNITIVE DISTORTIONS
-example
10:54 COGNITIVE DISTORTIONS
11:04 Polarized/dichotomous thinking
12:16 Over-geneneralization
12:46 fortune telling
13:38 emotional reasoning
14:29 catastrophizing
15:11 Negative mental filtering
Learn more here: positivepsychology.com/cognit...
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DISCLAIMER:
*Videos are provided for exploration and educational purposes only and does not constitute clinical suggestions or consultation for individual cases.
If you or someone you know is having a medical emergency involving harm to self, please reach out to the suicide prevention hotline suicidepreventionlifeline.org/.
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I'm Támara, a licensed and internationally/Board certified trauma mental health therapist, with over 14 years experience. I specialize in helping children, teens, and families with mental illness. I also treat psychological/emotional trauma in children, teens, and adults.
If you'd like to contact me or inquire about my international consultations, you may email me at contact@anchoredinknowledge.com. *Please note: all consultations are charged a fixed rate fee based on the case content.
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Thank you! I probably do these things, but I am so tired of the lack of accountability for anything one sibling does and I just can't do it anymore. I am very hurt and very angry. I have not gone or talked to any of my siblings for 3 years now. I just don't want to be around it anymore because nothing ever changes. I have learned to accept that she will never change, but I will not be a part of it any longer. The other siblings just go along. They just don't get it and I'm not going to say anything to them. It hurts! It is hard, but it is the decision I needed to make since there was never accountability or responsibility for the the things done to hurt me. Family is not everything to me any longer.
I hear you! Toxic siblings cause so much damage. They will never change because family enablers support them. I had to go no contact so I didn't lose my mind.
You're welcome!
I think we ALL do these things. Don't feel bad at ll. The way you have explained your thinking process on this is perfect. Despite doing all of these things (or some of these things), the goal is to move forward in a healthy way so that other relationships can be built appropriately, if that is in the "cards" for your life.
@@TherapistTamaraHill Yes, and thank you so very much for your work. It is so hard, I won't deny it, I struggle, but I refuse to give in like previous times. No more, it's on her and the truth burns. You see just how much you really mattered to them. It's a real awakening for sure. I was meant to really accept it long ago, but didn't and I paying the price for it now. It's a long rough road to see how much I neglected myself, too. It burns deep.
I'm in the same place as you, and only just starting to move myself away. Its hard and so easy to get dragged back into it again.
I don’t talk to my sibling either. He has me blocked on fb for getting angry at him for exploiting me untruthfully in a public post on fb and tagging my dad for support 5 yrs ago. It ruined my reputation with a lot of people so I’ve learned to step away from smear campaigns because of this
Sometimes I skadaddle from video's/info that could benefit me. I've been subscribed a few years/time is unreal, or too real. Terror feels/denial/shock and or whatnot, sometimes thinking "I'll come back later" and somehow never have the time and sometimes I'm so bored/paralyzed. Feels like failing and malfunctioning. Why not push forward..? I'm dead beat exhausted probably from all the times I've pushed through. I researched and researched about what means what and what is what. What do words mean, what do people mean, bodylanguage research, psychology and health research, research science, I fried my brain and got terrified as I still continue. This is the only way to make sense or something. Also realized leave it behind and push forward, what do I really want, what makes me feel good. I'm still on hold and neglecting myself because I think I feel undeserving. This situation is not healthy. I'm so angrysad can't understand why I forgot and what I forgot and mind is a scrambled maze eventhough I know about the memory loss and dissociation, like those "answers" are insufficient and I don't deserve goodness. It was as if I did everything wrong. While actually everything I did was at least okay and good like my self care. The grief hurt shock denial anger thing forces me to give attention and access to something I believe to be my last phase: Feeling the feelings and to honor it and believe myself. It also intertwines with being okay and opening up to certain people and ask for help. A few years ago started talking and sharing and things seemed like that was wrong so I jumped back into my shell. It was like a I told you so never ever do those things kinda thing. People didn't respond to my expectation, kind and understanding. Somehow I managed to get some hope and faith after rebuilding/fortifiying my existence. That's what gave me the vulnerability to be open about what's going on with me and my feels. It's sad and worth grieving. I feel deeply about many many situations eventhough the others hardly ever seem to care. Some tell you they do, "time will tell" has such a strong truth in it...
🌿🌺 Thank you T. May The Almighty One bless you, ameen ☝🏽💖🌌🎊🎉💫
I need to hear this
Me too
Me three.. is the Magic number!
I get stuck in mental traps trying to help my hubby manage his family. It's really hard though.
Yes, it is. But you are taking good steps to learn more and become more aware by watching videos like this.
Physical fights with my father. Turned me into such an angry confused person.
I'm so sorry. That's a mental trap for sure. It takes courage and consistent work to get out of that.
You Definitely Laid Out Alot in this Video, perhaps in the Past I may have just Been more Resistant to the Info....although this Booster Shot still holds a very Strong Sting..
* Here's to those Just Starting to Learn this as well as to those Here For Healthy Intermittent Reinforcement too.
Knowing it Really helps keep us Fresh to be able to recall this info in different ways♡
Powerful and always insightful. I'm going to rewatch this a couple of times. I want to be clear on my feelings towards my blood relatives.
Awesome content as always💯💯💯🔥🔥🔥🔥
Appreciate that! Thank you!
Thank you for the explanations, helps me to understand myself and my family members
You're welcome!! Glad this was helpful.
Hello friends! Some of the things I wanted to mention in the live chat yesterday is mentioned here. If you want to learn more about cognitive distortions, see my video here: ruclips.net/video/KRbxCjRktKo/видео.html
I understand that emotional stuff but when you break it is always the heart first, and the mind and body especially are always playing catch up. Why do these videos make me feel bad for feeling? I am human.
Mary, I approved your comment because I think it's good for other people to see this and see my response.
Perhaps the reason why you are feeling "bad" is because the materials covered in my videos causes you to reflect, process, and think on levels you may not be thinking on in your daily life. Another potential reason is because I am focusing on the negatives of how we function in unhealthy families -- so you are likely to feel negative as a result. The GOAL, however, is always to shine a light on the hidden things we think, feel, and experience -- and then provide tools, insights, and suggestions.
I hope this helps.
@@TherapistTamaraHill yes you hit a raw nerve. I've been a complete wreck today but now picking up the pieces. I just hope I can fit them all back together in the right place.
@@TherapistTamaraHill this helps bring a lot of clarity and reassurance
That's good to know :)
definitely explained it very well. thank you
Thank you! And you're welcome. Glad to hear this was helpful.