How to Talk to Anyone with Ease and Confidence

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  • @ScienceOfPeople
    @ScienceOfPeople  3 года назад +186

    Find out more in our full article on this topic: www.scienceofpeople.com/talk-to-anyone/

    • @2.0learning16
      @2.0learning16 3 года назад +2

      ruclips.net/video/Q5ilMM7kthM/видео.html

    • @Greggee100
      @Greggee100 3 года назад +2

      yeah, what do u do and what do u make????

    • @selfhelpsecrets
      @selfhelpsecrets 3 года назад +2

      3:12 Best pick up line: "Hi, how are you? I´m Vanessa or whatever..." I have to try that. :)

    • @Kindlylisten3
      @Kindlylisten3 3 года назад +1

      BUT I HAVE MY OWN STYLE. THAT DO NOT FOLLOW PICK UP LINES. NOT DOING WHAT PEOPLE TALK ABOUT PERSONALITY.
      BECAUSE I AM UNIQUE IN MYSELF. AND MY MIND OBSERVE PEOPLE IN REAL WORLD AND THAT'S HOW IT IS CREATED IN HUMAN.
      LIKE LEARNING AND RESPONSING.

    • @akhtarlaghari8484
      @akhtarlaghari8484 3 года назад

      Best

  • @staR-nh7wq
    @staR-nh7wq 4 года назад +4033

    Well once I asked someone
    “How are you?”
    And she said “Good how are you?”
    And I said back “I’m good how are you?”
    😭
    Edit: (someone in the comments asked what happened after that)
    She threw up and I’ve felt worthless and ashamed of myself ever since

    • @asiimwejoweria2584
      @asiimwejoweria2584 4 года назад +65

      hehe...it's coz u lack confidence..hihi

    • @RSanchez93
      @RSanchez93 4 года назад +151

      Welcome to my world lmao, im trying to better my people skills

    • @staR-nh7wq
      @staR-nh7wq 4 года назад +19

      asiimwe joweria YES! Glad you figured that one out.

    • @anitavirginillo
      @anitavirginillo 4 года назад +27

      That's funny

    • @kallansivparsad2765
      @kallansivparsad2765 4 года назад +31

      More than once for me 😂

  • @AmeenAhmed1105
    @AmeenAhmed1105 6 лет назад +13233

    I often plan out conversations in my head that I end up never having in real life.

  • @ajunicefor24h15
    @ajunicefor24h15 4 года назад +1413

    I'm awkward.
    Honestly .
    I really don't know what to say to people.
    It's like my mind goes completely blank and it refuses to help.
    I don't have friends because I can't communicate easily.
    I actually like being by myself though.
    Makes me a good listener.
    But you know we need to get ourselves out there sometimes.
    So I decided on 4 simple steps:
    1) open with a smile;
    2)compliment people;
    3)crack a joke here & there.
    4) most importantly - L I S T E N
    This is literally to anyone I meet.

    • @teresai1877
      @teresai1877 3 года назад +41

      Hi Aju, You can improve. I used to be terrible: either not talking at all (just smiling) or talking non stop. You just start little at a time. Say 1 or 2 things and then give them a chance to talk. Always keep it related and build off what the other person says. You: "Hey, ____, how is everything/how are you?" Other person: "Good thanks." You again: Ask them something depending on where this is/how you know them. If they're from work: So how's you're project going?/ What did you think of the meeting yesterday?/So what are you doing this weekend? Other person again: Now, it's their turn. Keep it going back and forth like a tennis match.

    • @ajunicefor24h15
      @ajunicefor24h15 3 года назад +2

      @@teresai1877Thankyou so much!!

    • @MooseBme
      @MooseBme 3 года назад +14

      General topics, hedlines, weather, clothes, cars... ;).

    • @Amina-ok7hf
      @Amina-ok7hf 3 года назад +5

      I figured it's good when you throw some sweet and funny self-deprecating story. Like that time I bough a SIM card on black market and whenever my boss would call me he would reach a 13 yo in Oregon. Her parents thought he was a creep, and he stopped talking to me at work. I couldn't figure out that I could make calls, but not accept them, because of faulty SIM.
      They find you human :)
      and then it flows

    • @blazeofficial6292
      @blazeofficial6292 3 года назад +25

      I don't know if I have brain damage, or my mind just goes blank I legit don't even know... :/

  • @amirulariffofficial8042
    @amirulariffofficial8042 3 года назад +324

    1)intention
    2)approach
    -body languange (smile, posture)
    3)open line
    -hey, how are you?
    4)look for mutual --> conversation sparks
    -eye brow raised
    5) end
    -future plan --> wish the best of luck

    • @fosibro4951
      @fosibro4951 2 года назад +1

      Hey how's it working out for you?

    • @k-yenma4956
      @k-yenma4956 2 года назад +1

      Thank youuu💙💙

    • @adell5092
      @adell5092 3 месяца назад

      Its also helps that she is very beautiful!😍

  • @anshroow
    @anshroow 5 лет назад +3703

    I know I have bad social skills but what is sad is that RUclips knows it enough to recommend this too me. 😂

  • @Andrew-ig5sp
    @Andrew-ig5sp 6 лет назад +4620

    *smile*
    *shoulders down and back*
    “Hi, How are you?”
    “I’m well, how are you?”
    “I’m well, thanks.”
    .....
    .....
    *runs away crying*

    • @psalmonefortysixdottwo9512
      @psalmonefortysixdottwo9512 6 лет назад +57

      LOL

    • @MelodyAMc14
      @MelodyAMc14 6 лет назад +107

      You forgot to finish with them saying "What just happened?"

    • @nova136565
      @nova136565 6 лет назад +165

      OMG. This is exactly how it would go for me except instead of crying it would just turn into embarrassment because of the silence. Lol.

    • @reddhawt2378
      @reddhawt2378 5 лет назад +10

      Lol! Right!

    • @nateanderson271
      @nateanderson271 5 лет назад +19

      Dude I’m crying!! 😭😂

  • @DrErwinKwun
    @DrErwinKwun 6 лет назад +1841

    Great video. Here is a summary of the tips from Vanessa:
    1. Set your intention
    2. Approach with open body language
    3. Open with a smile
    4. Aim for Sparks
    5. Exit by referring to the future

    • @markl.2299
      @markl.2299 6 лет назад +10

      SuccessinsightsTV - How do you exit by referring to the future if it’s Monday, Tuesday or Wednesday? “So...have any plans for Tuesday?” 🤨

    • @Heavy2deep
      @Heavy2deep 6 лет назад +5

      Thank you

    • @amysteriousdisease7168
      @amysteriousdisease7168 6 лет назад +4

      or could say like see you later

    • @mikeyriley8959
      @mikeyriley8959 6 лет назад +47

      6. Don't stare at her tits

    • @Stonefactor
      @Stonefactor 6 лет назад +2

      Comment should be pinned. Just needs the foot angle part summed up and added.

  • @dime192
    @dime192 4 года назад +1392

    Most of us Introverts have a hard time communicating with others because we have insecurities about ourselves.

    • @nematkashmiri7514
      @nematkashmiri7514 3 года назад +14

      It was great conversation .

    • @dr.greenmm1501
      @dr.greenmm1501 3 года назад +20

      I like snorting mushed bananas

    • @catherinemadison2175
      @catherinemadison2175 3 года назад +6

      ITS 1 AM AND IM WHEEZING

    • @evm6177
      @evm6177 3 года назад +13

      Introversion is nothing, just get a PHD in nuclear physics to boost your confidence or say your an Architect.. Either way you have to be employed of course. 🍷😉

    • @chucalissa9231
      @chucalissa9231 3 года назад +6

      I'm a introvert no problem.talking

  • @R4G397
    @R4G397 7 лет назад +860

    She's so good at speaking, so confident and no stuttering or long pauses.

    • @aspire2begreat938
      @aspire2begreat938 6 лет назад +18

      Michael Jacob she is the GOAT

    • @manisham.k6258
      @manisham.k6258 6 лет назад

      Hi can you join me ? I'm looking for best speaker if u can plz

    • @manisham.k6258
      @manisham.k6258 6 лет назад +2

      Plz msg me

    • @kushagrasonkar
      @kushagrasonkar 6 лет назад +28

      @@manisham.k6258 stop begging Indian dude or chick . Have some self respect and dignity

    • @ceecee8757
      @ceecee8757 6 лет назад +2

      Yes, the lady in blue has been doing this for a long time. 🤣

  • @e3ko889
    @e3ko889 5 лет назад +3807

    my conversation
    me: ''hi how are u ''
    random person: ''fine how are u''
    me: ''good''
    [awkward silence]

    • @shon8175
      @shon8175 5 лет назад +57

      Hahaha same

    • @mohitkerketta5176
      @mohitkerketta5176 5 лет назад +445

      Then continue on , nice to meet you ,
      Then ask what's they are upto .
      Then ask about weather and listen their answer , if they answer in 1 word then (it's a sign that they aren't interested in those questions much) . Then ask them bigger question , like , latest news or simply ask what do you like to do ,
      Then when they say their likings , simply focus on things they like and ask them about that .
      Try this 😌

    • @Sakshi-dn3xc
      @Sakshi-dn3xc 5 лет назад +58

      @@mohitkerketta5176 OMG thank you! you just saved my life

    • @mohitkerketta5176
      @mohitkerketta5176 5 лет назад +79

      @@Sakshi-dn3xc just know to respect people spaces if they don't want to engage .

    • @thiwankadeseram3576
      @thiwankadeseram3576 5 лет назад +10

      Ill be back

  • @musicenjoyer
    @musicenjoyer 6 лет назад +610

    There's no recipe for how to be attractive or confident. Just be comfortable with yourself and the rest will come by itself. Honestly, if you feel good with yourself you will never care about anyone's opinion, in a nice way.
    Find your Bliss people!

    • @hninoowai1431
      @hninoowai1431 5 лет назад +4

      I do agree

    • @billiexxxmelanie2773
      @billiexxxmelanie2773 4 года назад +23

      Lmao i have been faking my personality to the point that idk who i am ✌😭

    • @samsoOoma2009
      @samsoOoma2009 4 года назад +1

      Absolutely 👍🏼

    • @chimchimxchipi5854
      @chimchimxchipi5854 4 года назад +4

      Your answer is helpful. I think. But then, I'm dumb enough to go ahead and ask how to be comfortable with myself? 😂

    • @scooterlovya
      @scooterlovya 4 года назад

      @@chimchimxchipi5854 I know

  • @ercielaguerder4570
    @ercielaguerder4570 3 года назад +373

    My mind is also making a conversation with me while I'm conversing with someone

    • @hazelchief-rabbit5903
      @hazelchief-rabbit5903 3 года назад +9

      Oh man, I do that too!

    • @Sammasambuddha
      @Sammasambuddha 3 года назад +4

      Medicinal Marijuana totally ends the noisy mind and those voices!

    • @bradyrobertson23
      @bradyrobertson23 3 года назад +9

      @@Sammasambuddha medical alcohol can help with quieting the mind also🙂

    • @sladeo810
      @sladeo810 3 года назад +1

      I can't even have a conversation with myself!

    • @ВладимирКруглов-к9о
      @ВладимирКруглов-к9о 3 года назад +1

      Shout "shut up" at him and continue your unique inner conversation! That's the most important thing! :)

  • @VicZ582
    @VicZ582 5 лет назад +351

    A really good and condensed 7min talk, I watched 4 times.
    Here are notes I took and hope it helps other people like me.
    • Set an intention for the conversation you want to get out of
    • Smile to people
    • What’s a good opening line?
    ◦ Start with simple greeting, like : “hey how are ya” don’t say something too intense.
    ◦ Complement are great second and third.
    • Look for conversation sparks, find the cues of engagement, e.g. eyebrow raised, so you know they are interested in the topic. Find mutual likes.
    • Ending a conversation
    ◦ Last impression is as important as the first impression
    ◦ shift to future-warding discussion
    ◦ Mention you are happy to chat and wish them best luck
    • Approaching people: look for open gesture, be open gesture / pivot out when you want to be approached
    • Get off your cellphone
    • Tip for when you have no one to talk to on a party: a sweet spot is at the exit of the food line, that’s where people just got food and have no one talk to, and you can use your opening line “hey how are you”

  • @normapadro420
    @normapadro420 5 лет назад +135

    Hello. I was listening to a neighbor that was talking to me and all of a sudden my phone rang. I didn't answer it. They said to answer it and I told them that I enjoy their conversation and that I enjoy listening to them. Usually robo calls interrupt, but I wanted the person that was talking to me to feel that their conversation was meaningful to me. It's called appreciation.

    • @duendadelbosque
      @duendadelbosque 4 года назад +4

      That's an excellent advice and really nice to say tho

    • @ryanowen3026
      @ryanowen3026 4 года назад +4

      Mums dying.... fk it ithink its a robo call
      To the neighbour “ good weather today “...

    • @socb5642
      @socb5642 3 года назад +2

      well depends on who is calling

    • @HAHA-kk2xy
      @HAHA-kk2xy 3 года назад +1

  • @trpyk5628
    @trpyk5628 7 лет назад +5153

    The fact that I look up these kind of videos is pretty sad already.

    • @aspire2begreat938
      @aspire2begreat938 6 лет назад +49

      Vanessa Van Edwards you are the G.O.A.T. I hope I meet you one day!!!!

    • @aspire2begreat938
      @aspire2begreat938 6 лет назад +14

      Vanessa Van Edwards you are the G.O.A.T. I hope to meet you one day 🙏🏿

    • @LuisaH2022
      @LuisaH2022 6 лет назад +24

      Exactly. My grandmother hadn't have any problems to talk to waaay older people at her job or vacation. I didn't have any problems to talk to doctors and understand and being curious about my cold or how my heart beats. I could talk in English at 10 (English is not my native language) and be confident with my half American half UK language. I was confident to talk to my male colleagues about girl problems and periods and they were thankful because I prepared them to understand their future girlfriends, wives and daughters. Since I started university I changed into an emotionally abused depressive dog

    • @magicmc23
      @magicmc23 6 лет назад +55

      Trpy K dont worry. You are simply expanding your knowledge

    • @lawrenceno6877
      @lawrenceno6877 6 лет назад

      Tell your mom

  • @InkandCrystal
    @InkandCrystal Год назад +10

    1. Think of intention before a conversation
    2. Body language: hands visible, shoulders down, smile
    3. Best opening: "Hello how are you?"
    4. Sparks: eyebrows raise
    5. Best ending: "Hey what are you up to this weekend?" -> "It's so great to speak with you, I wish a best luck on ...."
    6. Pivot out when available for people to approach
    7. Sweet spot to find someone to talk: grab a drink and stand beside the snack place

    • @Wrenchhead-k3y
      @Wrenchhead-k3y 3 месяца назад

      Where like yin and yang. I don't shut up. The girl always said you're show. It's not all natural practice, but always a trade off. I get nervous when people are watching me read and lost. But I am extremely good at blackjack, Im happy with it. I'm trying out the force the conversation. I'm sorry. I said I try like I said I didn't shut up

  • @queenestyzigi5020
    @queenestyzigi5020 4 года назад +1437

    Introverts, gather here coz this tips will come in handy 😂

    • @maritariziki7172
      @maritariziki7172 4 года назад +4

      Lol

    • @mercyogunsan769
      @mercyogunsan769 4 года назад +1

      You an introvert???

    • @hoopla2671
      @hoopla2671 4 года назад +19

      Extrovert here, actually I've been struggling to start conversations and even worse meaningful conversations.

    • @ZealousWins
      @ZealousWins 4 года назад +2

      IntroGang

    • @eshavargh5065
      @eshavargh5065 4 года назад +2

      Yeah 😆

  • @jordonschneider8777
    @jordonschneider8777 5 лет назад +210

    How to Talk to Anyone with Ease and Confidence
    Step 1- walk up to anyone and make noises with your mouth
    Step 2- repeat step 1

  • @alexlovesplants
    @alexlovesplants 4 года назад +1965

    random but don't you think the name Vanessa fits her literally perfectly

    • @jatinameta6048
      @jatinameta6048 4 года назад +81

      Yes you're right her Face+Hair = Vanessa

    • @Black_pearl_adrift
      @Black_pearl_adrift 4 года назад +62

      Some people you look at them and go... yeah that fits perfectly 🤣

    • @naveene.c.5894
      @naveene.c.5894 4 года назад +4

      Would you like to practice English with me pls.

    • @ragnorfellandcantgetup3916
      @ragnorfellandcantgetup3916 4 года назад +6

      It means butterfly

    • @Prince7-n3t
      @Prince7-n3t 4 года назад

      Idk if u know but a name #Sunny fits yr profile pic as well

  • @PaulaGUmeh
    @PaulaGUmeh 3 года назад +244

    "Smile is the opening line"
    We need a pandemic version of this 😭

    • @dionysioskokkoris4340
      @dionysioskokkoris4340 3 года назад +20

      you can smile with your eyes as well

    • @classygary
      @classygary 3 года назад +16

      Take the useless mask off always helps

    • @classygary
      @classygary 3 года назад +8

      @@dionysioskokkoris4340 you can also take the useless mask off as well

    • @cleabarlow8952
      @cleabarlow8952 3 года назад +7

      Eyebrow raise

    • @L490sr
      @L490sr 3 года назад +3

      @@cleabarlow8952 the thing is..I’m always unconsciously glaring at people..well that’s what my sisters tell me

  • @reubenbroussard6955
    @reubenbroussard6955 4 года назад +75

    For those of you that are having trouble getting past the “Hey how are you?”, try not to focus on the conversation ending before it has even began. Instead, focus on the first step that Vanessa mentioned which is setting the intent. Even ask about their hobbies or work. Whatever they’re answer, dig further into that and ask questions about it as though you will be attempting it soon. I personally love being able to gain a new perspective in such a short amount of time simply through another’s words.

    • @vikramjangam
      @vikramjangam Год назад

      power of confidence : ruclips.net/video/-w4i44m4Vpc/видео.html

  • @KamranKhan-lo2ev
    @KamranKhan-lo2ev 6 лет назад +3266

    Q.Hey hello how are you?
    A. I have a boyfriend

    • @TrinSquared2
      @TrinSquared2 6 лет назад +42

      Kamran Khan 😂😂😂

    • @lorisiccia5914
      @lorisiccia5914 6 лет назад +78

      I ve said hi how are you.. or just the hi.... and the zombie walk right past... nothin..no hello no grunt no nod.
      Icome from a small town where evem strangers say hello in passing... or at minimum a smile or nod.. even a shrug
      Ok.... cool good chat.
      Zombies.. everywhere.
      Its the first word we learn besides mamma or daddy.... yet people have stopped saying a simple hello. Some might say hello if i have my dog with me. But even then sometimes another person with a dog... the dog is more friendly than the person.
      Have people lost their basic hello or hi?
      Like a hello or a hi means something more.
      Dont worry ive had that same answer
      Hi....
      I have a gf / bf
      Ok...Im not lookin.. im just saying hi!

    • @heinzkitzvelvet
      @heinzkitzvelvet 6 лет назад +110

      Kamran Khan Your best response in that situation should be "So do I" and then laugh your ass off. If she laughs, you're in. You can then strike up a conversation.
      1. She didn't expect that response and it throws her off her game and crashes thru her bitch walls. So she's immediately intrigued and entertained.
      2. For the moment, she thinks you're gay so the flight or fight response is immediately removed.
      3. You've made her laugh, you've crashed right thru her guard walls and you've taken away the threat of just some random guy hitting on her.
      If you're comfortable with yourself you can play up the gay angle and get really lispy and queenish and talk about how fabulous her make up or nail colour or outfit or whatever you like, is.
      Chicks CANNOT resist a guy who can play the moment like that. She'll be puddy in your hands.
      And even if you bomb, just laugh at yourself and tell her how much of a jackass you are and apologize for waisting her time. Begin to walk away and she'll BEG you to stay and talk to her more.

    • @juliusp147
      @juliusp147 6 лет назад +6

      😂😂😂😂😂😂

    • @getitdone0010
      @getitdone0010 6 лет назад +3

      ssooooo cuteee

  • @HeatherlyM
    @HeatherlyM 4 года назад +54

    Yes, I always say “Hi, how are you?” And then judging by their response I know how to go from there. Body language is key.

    • @oceankombas4235
      @oceankombas4235 4 года назад

      Yeah exactly

    • @papichulotv727
      @papichulotv727 4 года назад

      Heather Murphy where do you live

    • @nonobuddie5018
      @nonobuddie5018 4 года назад +1

      why i hate people, or is me?
      mwhahahaaaa

    • @naveene.c.5894
      @naveene.c.5894 4 года назад

      Would you like to practice English with me pls

    • @Financefarmers
      @Financefarmers 3 года назад

      ruclips.net/video/Rb1sBRpoGF4/видео.html
      Subscribe and support plzzzz

  • @katcampbell9213
    @katcampbell9213 3 года назад +72

    I find the best conversations happen with people I have chemistry with. Its sadly a darn rare occurrence but lovely when it happens

  • @ericafarley2850
    @ericafarley2850 7 лет назад +230

    I'm an introvert & shy & have been wanting to expanding my circle of influence. This really brings clarity on just how to start talking to people.

    • @AkhirahOverDunya85
      @AkhirahOverDunya85 6 лет назад +2

      Same here....good luck :)

    • @popbroke3505
      @popbroke3505 6 лет назад

      Introverted the way to go

    • @fatimasamira3695
      @fatimasamira3695 6 лет назад +1

      Erica Farley Same here. Venessa is the savior when it comes to socializing.

    • @biancadanielhnc3576
      @biancadanielhnc3576 6 лет назад

      You. Most be. A. Star. you have it 500000$%.

    • @AZ_TONY
      @AZ_TONY 6 лет назад +11

      Read "how to win friends and influence people" and learn how to meditate trust me, I grew up very shy and introverted my entire life but I knew that I had this desire to get my message out into the world so I realized i had to learn not only how to talk to people but also how to influence a certain outcome that I desired, this can be used for both good and evil so use this information wisely, being around people often drained the life out of me and given that English was not my 1st language the idea of trying to start a conversation with someone made me want to crawl into a hole and disappear, so what I did is I forced myself into a situation where my survival depended on my ability to communicate with people and I picked up a commission only sales job, needless to say it took me a while but i got very well st what i did and after the years of education I can boil down the majority of my "success" to those 2 principles, learn and understand people, learn how to get people to like you, and learn how to meditate especially if you're an introvert so that you won't be drained after interacting with people, that's what meditation did for me it taught me how to preserve my energy and taught me how to use my energy to do what I want it to do when I want it to do it without exhausting myself, I use the meditation app called headspace but I think there are other free ones, now I'm working on a book that I am writing, a dream that I've always had, and am looking to do public speaking and starting a RUclips channel to promote my books and ideas, something i never thought would be possible for me given my upbringing. Anyways I hope this helped.

  • @Kristina-zt2op
    @Kristina-zt2op 6 лет назад +731

    The hard part comes after the Hey, how are ya 😂

    • @paulchahal3095
      @paulchahal3095 6 лет назад +52

      Have pre-planned answers for most occasions. We as humans love to connect with others. If still you have issues, put it on your Creator [as a Manufacturing Defect! LoL], you are not at fault for your mental-makeup or its perceived shortcomings, you excel some other areas!. Move on, life is too precious to be self-critical, laugh with world and world will laugh with you! -Blessings.

    • @lorisiccia5914
      @lorisiccia5914 6 лет назад +18

      Yes agreed.. someone actually replying is a start....its not all on you.
      Im still trying to figure the art of conversation myself.. i am an introvert but still like to say simple hello to people in passing.
      The replies back are starting to be fewer these days. I say hi to everyone...i find older people or a dog lover wanting to stop to say hello to my dog are the only people who reply.
      If they dont reply... its probably some one i dont want to talk to anyway.

    • @ethnicleanserberg7975
      @ethnicleanserberg7975 6 лет назад +2

      @@paulchahal3095 "Manufacturing defect" hahahahahahah ! Thank you

    • @gustavoalonso-moreno1251
      @gustavoalonso-moreno1251 6 лет назад +12

      Just go with your gut. It's not difficult. It's all in your mind, really.

    • @TimeKillerC
      @TimeKillerC 6 лет назад +4

      The hard part is the hey how are you

  • @orlandofranconovesterasjr.5548
    @orlandofranconovesterasjr.5548 4 года назад +65

    The foundation of the person who you are and the conversations that you have with other people is determined by the behavioural patterns that you saw when you were young, what other people made you felt and especially from your parents growing up. Break the pattern and love yourself, you are great and what ever you have to say and think is unique and every one will appreciate what you say.
    It starts with loving yourself, accepting and knowing that you are overall great just as you are. Then eventually you'll love yourself more to improve everything about how you communicate.
    What this video is missing is that you need to trully love and respect yourself in order to have great conversations with other people. The negative conversations you have yourself and the thoughts you have in your head is what's stopping you from having awesome and freeflowing conversations with people.

    • @conversationcorner1837
      @conversationcorner1837 2 года назад

      There are actual behaviors that people display that turns other people off. These bad behaviors needed to be iron out (For example, giving unsolicited advice under the belief that you're being honest/blunt). That's why there's a market for learning social skills.

    • @BrownWoman1011
      @BrownWoman1011 Год назад

      ​@Bigfriendly1570 Sounds like Adhd My son has it, and he had the same issues.

    • @minhyuksssmile
      @minhyuksssmile Год назад

      @Bigfriendly1570 me too i get distracted easily and i cant pay attention to stuff anymore like i used too but its ok i hope you have goodluck

  • @nutalomzin5625
    @nutalomzin5625 3 года назад +7

    I'm introvert but I try to be more sociable. I just feel like If I can do I will have a lot of friends, new knowledges I've never know before, new attitudes and etc..

  • @d.e.t4147
    @d.e.t4147 5 лет назад +7

    I was a bartender for years in a former life and I feel working in the night life industry really taught me a lot about how to communicate with, and read people.
    Most, if not all, of what I learned is intuition so learning some science backed skills is very helpful.
    Thank you.

  • @bronsonmcdonald5473
    @bronsonmcdonald5473 5 лет назад +8

    I really enjoyed learning about the body language. I didn't realize I might have been sending out a message of being less approachable than I intended. I have had alot of social anxiety in the past, still have some but I am much better now. I was going out last week for dinner with some folks I used to work with and I was really looking forward to it, but still had to get myself 'psyched up' for it. I did 2 things: I set my intention of having some great fun and laughs, and to be my genuine self. The other thing was that I had 1 question in mind for each person to ask. Night went great!

  • @discorabbit
    @discorabbit 4 года назад +33

    Water running in a stream has no plan. Yet it flows harmoniously, not resisting. So it is with conversation.

  • @sacdaabdurhman
    @sacdaabdurhman 3 года назад +20

    “Leaders can let you fail and yet not let you be a failure.” Sharing some love from small RUclipsr

  • @nz7780
    @nz7780 3 года назад +31

    It’s easy to head toward the end of a convo politely, but sometimes it’s hard to not end the convo awkwardly or abruptly especially with someone who isn’t good at picking up on cues that the convo is fizzling out, time to go, or it’s been going on for forever, etc. But love the future question/mention technique!

  • @dreammakergarage1133
    @dreammakergarage1133 3 года назад +13

    I picked up my wife with this line.
    Would you like some company. She said yes. It was a wrap from there. This was at work in the cafeteria. It took me a little bit to build up the courage to do that. Lol.

  • @AR-rn8ok
    @AR-rn8ok 3 года назад +30

    She forgot to mention our appearance as well. It’s easier to have a conversation with someone who is clean, smells, good, is well groomed, and has a nice style. For example this woman is gorgeous. Every guy in the room wants to chat with her.

  • @zuhamalik7686
    @zuhamalik7686 2 года назад

    Saw this video 4 years back when I started university. Now graduated and starting my career, I am back here to tell you that IT WORKS!! I am an extreme introvert and I made alot of freinds. And if not freinds but have build this capacity to talk to people.

  • @YeshuaIsTheTruth
    @YeshuaIsTheTruth 5 лет назад +14

    I really like how simple but simultaneously novel your tips are.
    Asking "how are you", open body language, and equal importance on 1st and last impressions. I will definitely be trying this formula out soon! Thank you!

  • @beverleyroberts1025
    @beverleyroberts1025 6 лет назад +236

    The Spanish are so good at saying good morning or good day to total strangers that they pass in the street. It can totally brighten your day when total stranger says this to you.😄

    • @lorisiccia5914
      @lorisiccia5914 6 лет назад +22

      Ive been trying to do this for past few years...because it can really turn someones day around...not because it was from me.. just someone in general.
      Hello...with a smile.... but finding more often than not people just give me a weird side look or keep going.. only a few reply back..
      Its just a hello or good morning...or just morning...
      Its not askin someone for coffee ...
      Why are people so weird on replying back...ok it might not be a good morning for them...its not always a good morning for me either especially when someone just walks by....
      People could just do anything even a grunt or nod or smile. Or a simple wave.
      Im trying to figure out why people have stopped saying hello.
      It does the opposite effect when you say hello to 15 people snd not one says hello back...then 16 says nice day out isnt it? Yes.. its beautiful out... or yes...enjoy your walk.feel bad ehen no one replies And it somehow makes the day better having a reply back...

    • @Bbydoll90
      @Bbydoll90 6 лет назад +6

      Hola señor🙋‍♀️🙋‍♀️

    • @ARichardP
      @ARichardP 6 лет назад +1

      Easier, yes. But it’s not true that many average-looking people aren’t good conversationalists. They work at it longer and harder and don’t waste time blaming and complaining.

    • @dmonk926
      @dmonk926 6 лет назад +3

      who would do that in a city where you pass 5 people every second? that would seem kinda crazy to me. i do see people select a few random people out of the crowd to say hello or good day to

    • @robink5433
      @robink5433 6 лет назад

      Beverley Roberts Gracias

  • @milestrombley1466
    @milestrombley1466 6 лет назад +34

    Having a mindset of knowing what you want to talk about is good.

  • @SamuelAlder
    @SamuelAlder 3 года назад +1

    0. Set an intention!
    1. Hey how are you? (On approach)
    2. Find common interests... follow what makes your conversational partner raise their eyebrows or say things like "oh really?"
    3. Know when to end the conversation and do so by asking "what are you doing later today / tomorrow ? OK good luck with that and enjoy it!"
    Thanks a lot for this Vanessa, I'm sure your helping lots of people (:
    I wonder if you share this opinion: talking about ones passions and what one loves and is grateful for, focusing on that is better/ more attractive than criticism and complaint... staying in that genuinely grateful state requires me (personally) to meditate at least once a day.

  • @mandydada4093
    @mandydada4093 4 года назад +328

    me: wants to talk
    also me: wants to stop the endless convo without being rude

    • @mizuuwu
      @mizuuwu 4 года назад +8

      I RELATE SOOOO MUUUUUCH

    • @vsatonthebeat4101
      @vsatonthebeat4101 4 года назад

      like just like wtf this isn't funny so I prefer silence😂

  • @Meechl
    @Meechl 8 лет назад +98

    WOW! I'm terrible with job interviews and this video has come at the right time for me. I'm going to take your free course on personal development and influence, because it's just what I need.

    • @jameshofheins4612
      @jameshofheins4612 8 лет назад +18

      How did it go?

    • @th3p00r5
      @th3p00r5 6 лет назад +3

      Meechl < same here. I still can't answer "what is your strength?"

  • @GiovannaElias-CONNECTIONCODE
    @GiovannaElias-CONNECTIONCODE 3 года назад +4

    "Your smile is your opening line..." Yes, exactly. I teach my clients that non-verbal cues are just as powerful as verbal cues. They have the power to make all the difference when it comes to communicating and connecting with people.

  • @publicspeakingbasics
    @publicspeakingbasics 2 года назад +2

    The next generation needs this more than anything - we don't get enough practice due to all our tech & social media. Kudos for sharing your insights!

  • @DragnBludthrsty
    @DragnBludthrsty 6 лет назад +11

    Ending conversations politely has always been tricky; thanks for the tip.

  • @Es16432
    @Es16432 4 года назад +6

    summery: before Event set a Goal, Approach Person openly with a smile, "Hi, how are you?" find a common interest that creates spark (Person raises brows).
    to end conversation: ask About future Events, wish them luck doing that

  • @chuckb337
    @chuckb337 3 года назад +10

    Vision your outcome, work the q's, be at ease, be engaged, be genuine, be smart, work within their interest, set up for the later conversation.
    Makes total sense. Probably natural for extroverts. Much was brought to light here. Thanks

  • @paulinjosepha2336
    @paulinjosepha2336 3 года назад +1

    i can't believe some people still dislike this informative, interesting, and well done video ? She is trying to help us to get better.

  • @troutt99
    @troutt99 7 лет назад +10

    I love people and I love the science of people. I really love listening to you, Vanessa Van Edwards! You are helping me to be the best version of myself.

  • @flightforlight157
    @flightforlight157 3 года назад +11

    Makes so much sense never thought about these things lol the biggest thing for me is having the mindset to be open-minded

  • @brose.03
    @brose.03 4 года назад +50

    Me, finally walks up to my crush:
    Me: “Hey, how are you?”
    Him: “Great! I just asked my crush out and she said ‘yes’.”
    Me: “that’s great...🙃

    • @Financefarmers
      @Financefarmers 3 года назад +1

      ruclips.net/video/Rb1sBRpoGF4/видео.html
      Subscribe and support plzzzz

    • @socb5642
      @socb5642 3 года назад +2

      😂😂😂😂😂😞😞😞

  • @Dashingdiva73
    @Dashingdiva73 3 года назад +18

    I wish I was this smooth. I can only do this when I'm working but not socially.

    • @azme9355
      @azme9355 3 года назад +1

      You're very pretty

  • @dogan6070
    @dogan6070 5 лет назад +113

    I start talking to random people. After a few mins. I run out of words. I just fart to get the conversion more interesting.

  • @agamem5749
    @agamem5749 6 лет назад +22

    # First rule: intention
    # Open body language, smile
    # Opener: hi, how are you
    # Asking questions to find sparks (non verbal cues)
    # Ending a conversation : ask about future
    plans (weekend plans), then end the conversation.

    • @mzorkea
      @mzorkea 6 лет назад

      how does identifying the intention beforehand helps?

    • @IncomitatusExcelsior
      @IncomitatusExcelsior 5 лет назад +1

      @@mzorkea It focuses your thoughts and helps you generate the questions to ask while you are looking for 'sparks'.

  • @keamomatlala8517
    @keamomatlala8517 4 года назад +780

    My anxiety is peaking just thinking about implementing her advice💀

  • @joshludwick8645
    @joshludwick8645 3 года назад

    I've found most people, even extroverted conversationalists are usually very understanding with shyness or awkwardness. You could say "sorry I'm being so awkward" or something like that and people usually respond "oh me too! Im so awkward sometimes." Or "eh don't worry you're fine."
    From my personal experience, try being more observant with the people you interact with. If you notice they got a new haircut or car, you could bring that up in conversation. Ask questions and listen as best you can. "How's the family?" Or "What are you up to these days?". Just like that, you're a pro! (Well not really but A for effort)

  • @DEVIL3333333
    @DEVIL3333333 8 лет назад +13

    Vanessa, I just gotta say, you absolutely nailed this one, this video is absolutely amazing and invaluable, I've read so much psychology and pickup material and they all touch upon little bits and bobs but you read one book to only get 1 point that really matters out of all of the main essential ones you mentioned. Thank You so much! and Keep doing what you are doing as this is amazing.

  • @thesacredprofaneco
    @thesacredprofaneco 4 года назад +13

    I LOVE learning what I have always done naturally - so I know how to share it with others to do for themselves. Thank you Vanessa & SOP!!!

    • @Financefarmers
      @Financefarmers 3 года назад

      ruclips.net/video/Rb1sBRpoGF4/видео.html
      Subscribe and support plzzzzo

  • @walidbahhur8132
    @walidbahhur8132 4 года назад +279

    During pandemic, “how are you?” “Backup 6 feet!”

    • @fowzziabegum3397
      @fowzziabegum3397 3 года назад

      😬🏃‍♀️🤭

    • @KateBabaali
      @KateBabaali 3 года назад

      Lmfao

    • @darrenmcdermott3665
      @darrenmcdermott3665 3 года назад +1

      Just hug them right away !

    • @blakejames9743
      @blakejames9743 3 года назад +1

      @Ferzzy It's a blessing in disguise. I've met a good amount of people that were desperately looking others to talk to that were not afraid to connect because of the virus. While I respect other people's decisions on their safety, I don't let them rule me. Some think I'm crazy, but most admire the bold stance.

    • @100samanthamarie
      @100samanthamarie 3 года назад

      Riot police: •coughhh coughhh COUUGHHH*
      Peaceful protestors: 😱 🤢 back up 6 feet!
      Peaceful protestors who don’t accept bullshit: 🤜 👮🏽

  • @supplychainsants
    @supplychainsants 3 года назад +6

    Awsome explanations: Intension, Approach, Opener, Sparks, Body Language, Start of Conversation, Interest and Exits. You have explained the things in a simple way. 👍💫

  • @anewloveofficial9137
    @anewloveofficial9137 6 лет назад +14

    I really need your amazing tips on how to have a conversation with anyone because I'm not that really good in talking to people I just met. Your advice is just right for me and I hope I can apply it someday for business and social purposes.

  • @nomjko
    @nomjko 5 лет назад +74

    I always say " sounds good " to end a conversation 😂

  • @crayons1584
    @crayons1584 4 года назад +6

    A very small conversation starter that I've actually found is really useful:
    What's your least favorite movie, song, show, etc.
    By asking for their least favorite instead of favorite, it not only surprises them but gets a more genuine answer

  • @Yosh808
    @Yosh808 7 лет назад +6

    Awesome advice! You dont know how much people tell me: "Just go and talk to people itll happen naturally" Prepping a gameplan is exactly what i needed.

  • @neerajsaxena
    @neerajsaxena Год назад +3

    Very useful tips for a nice conversation, open hands work really well (makes you look open and honest), "Hey! How are you" and "Hey! how do you do" could be nice starters for a healthy and long interesting conversation. Go ahead, don't feel low while talking to someone looking smarter than you. You too can win hearts. The conversation is the key to starting a healthy relationship.

  • @chiaram1048
    @chiaram1048 4 года назад +251

    I always feel like I'm the worst at conversations lol

    • @raxitlakhatariya5915
      @raxitlakhatariya5915 4 года назад +10

      hello how are you

    • @raxitlakhatariya5915
      @raxitlakhatariya5915 4 года назад +24

      Now i get it u dont even reply my how r u,
      U must be very bad at conversation XD😄

    • @orlandofranconovesterasjr.5548
      @orlandofranconovesterasjr.5548 4 года назад +16

      Because that's the pattern that you saw, what other people made you felt and especially from your parents growing up. Break the pattern and love yourself, you are great and what ever you have to say and think is unique and every one will appreciate what you say.
      It starts with loving yourself, accepting and knowing that you are overall great. Then eventually you'll love yourself more to improve everything about how you communicate.
      What this video is missing is that you need to trully love and respect yourself in order to have great conversations with other people. The negative conversations you have yourself and the thoughts you have in your head is what's stopping you from having awesome and freeflowing conversations with people.

    • @naveene.c.5894
      @naveene.c.5894 4 года назад +2

      Would you like to practice English with me pls

    • @raxitlakhatariya5915
      @raxitlakhatariya5915 4 года назад

      @@naveene.c.5894 download buddytalk and talk with thousands of people in english

  • @TheProductivityCenter
    @TheProductivityCenter 3 года назад +6

    Really loved the tips especially the part about changing minds to the future before you leave a conversation, only God knows how many times I've ended a conversation with a really awkward tone

  • @StephanieStoven
    @StephanieStoven 6 лет назад +85

    Going to give these a try!! I tend to be really shy or look unapproachable at work events

    • @paulchahal3095
      @paulchahal3095 6 лет назад +3

      Steph: You look perfect! Look thru the eyes of your Creator and creator[your Mom]! Thou shalt not be self-critical, it is insult to your Creator/creator! Enjoy life. Others do not give bread and butter to you, Creator(s) do! -Blessings

    • @StephanieStoven
      @StephanieStoven 6 лет назад

      paul chahal Thank you!

    • @paulchahal3095
      @paulchahal3095 6 лет назад +7

      @@StephanieStoven Another concept: We humans think as if we are eternal; that is illusion. We are leaking life by each breath like a tap losing water from a water-tank. Do not let life to waste. Just bump into person U love, now you are on a mission to use every second of life, and get going showering your emotions. Humans are not your judges. No one give you even a free cup of coffee! So shed their burden to control you to their whims! You are as free as Creators! And bliss will flow into your life like air rushes into vacuum!

    • @mohamodahmed2041
      @mohamodahmed2041 6 лет назад

      hi

    • @starkmakingrad1914
      @starkmakingrad1914 6 лет назад

      paul chahal Wow - that is awesome - thank you for writing that! I'm totally saving that (I'll quote you of course)

  • @Nadia-18
    @Nadia-18 3 года назад +3

    I should have seen this when I was at a outdoors bar! I felt like I was missing some cues but I realize now why! Thank you xx

  • @marthaclayton2457
    @marthaclayton2457 3 года назад +3

    I did call colds in my job for about 12 years. I remember it was so hard and scary to approach to people I didn't know. Now, no one can't stop me🤣🤣🤣like Bob proctor says. You learn by repetition until all becomes naturally

  • @billroubanis4750
    @billroubanis4750 2 года назад

    This woman is the first person I have seen out of the people who talk about this stuff, ie body language, pick up lines, dating strategies, etc. who is actually intelligent, entertaining and likeable.

  • @Maiiizz
    @Maiiizz 3 года назад +4

    I can finally talk to my family thank you so much for teaching me

  • @fennyfenny9718
    @fennyfenny9718 6 лет назад +6

    Wow..i like her.she is very confident and she knows what is she talking about😍😍

    • @Financefarmers
      @Financefarmers 3 года назад

      ruclips.net/video/Rb1sBRpoGF4/видео.html
      Subscribe and support plzzzzzzzx

  • @deborahrippe5641
    @deborahrippe5641 5 лет назад +4

    I love this!!! I’ve always considered myself an extroverted introvert because I’m fine in small groups or at work but throw me in a big group of people and I have a hard time navigating. Great tips!

    • @lextor4712
      @lextor4712 5 лет назад

      you're probably an ambivert.

  • @mr.shihab4089
    @mr.shihab4089 3 года назад +2

    The best teacher of how to be a better person that I feel happy and enjoying her videos. ✨💌

  • @jameshofheins4612
    @jameshofheins4612 8 лет назад +239

    You. Are. Amazing.
    Wait.
    Hey, how are you?
    You. Are. Amazing!

  • @karanchoudhury3935
    @karanchoudhury3935 4 года назад +325

    Someone: Hey, how are you?
    Me: Alive Unfortunately.

    • @Loverof_christ99
      @Loverof_christ99 4 года назад +9

      Kwaisy :D you sound like an interesting person to talk to

    • @oxforddictonary
      @oxforddictonary 4 года назад +6

      Legit. Depression makes me not wanna talk to anyone period. Just let me do my job and go home at 5 pm. Pllllleeeeease. #SmallTalkIsPainful

    • @rickybobby9840
      @rickybobby9840 4 года назад +1

      😂😂😂

    • @areusi2221
      @areusi2221 4 года назад +1

      Relatable

    • @ketodiet5766
      @ketodiet5766 4 года назад +1

      Damn

  • @khloe38
    @khloe38 8 лет назад +81

    What if you ask someone what they're doing this evening or this weekend and they think you're asking them out, or want to invite them to something, when really you're just curious?

    • @drlawrence8246
      @drlawrence8246 6 лет назад +1

      khloe38 same thoughts a while ago but in the convo, Vanessa didnt push through and just said her well wishes for their future endeavors. She never said she'd like to join them.

    • @adunnou2075
      @adunnou2075 6 лет назад +6

      Thats their problem.

    • @erikaflores9954
      @erikaflores9954 6 лет назад +5

      khloe38 that is why I do not like to ask this question

    • @thedude3636
      @thedude3636 6 лет назад +5

      I'm free this weekend, if that's what you're getting at ;)

    • @simplechicful
      @simplechicful 6 лет назад +1

      khloe38 Would you say people are usually interested in the other person when they ask someone that question?

  • @jaredoz957
    @jaredoz957 Год назад +2

    Ungggghhhh..... I hate strangers starting with inquiring how I am. It's so insincere. When I don't have an "intention " the other person asking me how I am is often a nonstarter.
    Thank you for these quick tips. I am a full time ride share driver and I am often analyzing how conversations go. I am the host in this environment and I have to follow my guest's lead in conversational habits. Thank you.

    • @ScienceOfPeople
      @ScienceOfPeople  Год назад +1

      My pleasure! I hope they are helpful for you. :)

  • @Jason2-legit
    @Jason2-legit 8 лет назад +436

    Vanessa. What to do when you genuinely don't like talking to people?.... I feel its overrated and I'm just not interested in most of what they say. Unfortunately, my life doesn't allow me to just not talk to people. Most days I feel I would be perfectly happy being the only person on the planet. My wife and kids are great, but other than that, its just too much work. Not a social anxiety issue-just not into people.

    • @benwilkonski8635
      @benwilkonski8635 8 лет назад +67

      i have the same issue as you. I hate it when random people or strangers that I am alone with or next to me begin talking to me. I find it annoying when people try to create artificial conversation. If it is someone who I will eventually become friendly with such as an in-law or a classmate or a friend of a friend then I will have more interest in what they have to say.

    • @Jason2-legit
      @Jason2-legit 8 лет назад +44

      Hey How are ya? Did ya catch the ball game last night?

    • @benwilkonski8635
      @benwilkonski8635 8 лет назад +15

      uret7 no i didnt

    • @versapious9980
      @versapious9980 8 лет назад +35

      +Slappy McSlapface You should have the cubs won. i'm not a cubs fan but I'm glad they got it. Their chance of repeating is not so good, though i don't expect the fans are expecting they will do so. I've been to 5 cubs games over the years, i try to catch one if I'm ever near Chicago. Wrigley Field is beautiful and their fans are awesome, i tried to blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. AND , blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, ALSO blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah,blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah AND lah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Also, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah,blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, AND blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah

    • @MagsChase1229
      @MagsChase1229 7 лет назад +20

      With conversation, it is a two way street. Its nice when people acknowledge us and are interested in what
      we have to say....then we have to make a mental note and stop talking about "me" and ask them questions
      about them. Also, keep conversations light, if these folks start talking too deep, or check your watch
      and excuse yourself.

  • @Ya_0_-x
    @Ya_0_-x 5 лет назад +541

    Me sees cute girl at party:
    Me: How dress are you cute?

    • @Max-fx5fs
      @Max-fx5fs 4 года назад +61

      LMAOOOOO bro I would have to restart the conversation and walk back like I'm a whole different person

    • @kevingalang9831
      @kevingalang9831 4 года назад +31

      Do have your stupid

    • @billiexxxmelanie2773
      @billiexxxmelanie2773 4 года назад +16

      @@kevingalang9831 u do not smartness? yes thanks

    • @getcomfortable3373
      @getcomfortable3373 4 года назад +14

      That would be perfect 👌🏻 that way when you go to restart the conversation you’ve built that relaxed atmosphere. Instantly get someone laughing is the best start 😊 I would love that!

    • @leowong2613
      @leowong2613 4 года назад +14

      He is speaking the language of gods

  • @dawnmullen4348
    @dawnmullen4348 6 лет назад +33

    pauses, lulls, and silence are not BAD.

  • @joeljohnson4465
    @joeljohnson4465 2 года назад +1

    The best way to continue conversations is through key word association, aka “threading.” This is the engine of conversation which is why you need to actually listen to notice the key words. You can pick any key word in someone’s sentence and use it to transition to an associated topic at will.

  • @AtacamaHumanoid
    @AtacamaHumanoid 5 лет назад +5

    Good tips and would work with inlaws and business / networking functions pretty well where conversation is mostly nothingness and you need effective tricks to not stumble over the awkwardness. Occasionally, those nothing conversations at lame events get surprisingly interesting and make the event a lot more fun, so I'm sure steering into the conversation is the most important part. Steering out of the conversation, I don't generally care about, lol.

  • @Yellow-Rose
    @Yellow-Rose 8 лет назад +9

    good stuff, vanessa! this would help people who are awkward but don't mean to be. my brother is so painfully shy, so he would benefit from this. thanks.

  • @MisfitMandy
    @MisfitMandy 4 года назад +5

    This is amazing! Really helpful tips that are simple to grasp and doable. Where was I when this was uploaded 4 years ago😭

  • @andresdreier8289
    @andresdreier8289 3 года назад +1

    Hello, how are you? I'm Andy. I was a very shy person. These techniques really work and have helped me to start conversations with others. Thank you so much.

  • @syedarizvi89
    @syedarizvi89 5 лет назад +6

    I absolutely love how you're explaining everything. I have questions to ask; I'm nice at conversation but sometimes there are some people who makes it awkward like they wouldn't respond/reciprocate you. They would constantly stare at you and say nothing. There are others who'd make faces (mimick you in an offensive sense) it's like you've met this person for the first time and don't know why they're acting this way. I hope you're understanding what I mean. Can you explain how to deal with these type of people?

    • @passingan1555
      @passingan1555 4 года назад

      Get you

    • @ravireddyism
      @ravireddyism Год назад +1

      That’s because they think you are not worthy of responding. The first big thing to know is when to intiate a conversation and with whom to initiate a conversation. It’s like a you are a great dancer but you shouldn’t dance for sad emotional songs that has no life to dance.

  • @joliosalinas761
    @joliosalinas761 6 лет назад +13

    3:28 even the fly liked her when she said " Hi how are you " lol

  • @DonDubin
    @DonDubin 4 года назад +129

    I feel like this is a video that would be shown to an alien species trying to learn to fit into to human society, or ... me.

  • @deepthim8896
    @deepthim8896 3 года назад +1

    Intention - getting to know/ laugh/ have fun
    Approach - open body language, shoulders down and back and smile
    First line- hello, how are you?
    Spark- have spark.. Have eyebrow raises, it happensonly in engagingconversations.. engaging curiously..
    Ending conversation- what are doing later today? Weekend?
    Ask about future, shift from the present conversation before saying bye

  • @ACM86
    @ACM86 5 лет назад +37

    *approach person*
    Me: *eyebrow raise*
    Person: “hello?”
    Me: *Smile* sparky
    Person: “ok...”
    Me: “hello, fun baseball game”
    Perfection

  • @okaykatee
    @okaykatee 5 лет назад +99

    It's funny how every technique she tells us she's uses herself

    • @SharifD-PaletteAnArtdsb
      @SharifD-PaletteAnArtdsb 4 года назад

      ruclips.net/video/kz_FQgDeFMk/видео.html

    • @Financefarmers
      @Financefarmers 3 года назад

      ruclips.net/video/Rb1sBRpoGF4/видео.html
      Subscribe and support plzzzzo

  • @daenggassing7632
    @daenggassing7632 6 лет назад +156

    When does she breath?

  • @DarshanTradeTalk
    @DarshanTradeTalk 3 года назад

    I love the host clearing all the point and putting valid point..🙌

  • @bronzejourney5784
    @bronzejourney5784 5 лет назад +66

    *shoulders down and back, hand fully visible with palms and all, big hearty smile*
    Me: Hi!
    Other normal person: Pervert.

    • @100samanthamarie
      @100samanthamarie 3 года назад

      😂 For real though, we’ve got to start literally telling our brothers and sons to never rape women. Rapists ruin it for good well-intentioned men.

  • @thattimestampguy
    @thattimestampguy 2 года назад +4

    0:50 Setting intentions; knowing what you want from the conversation
    1:58 Nice open body language
    3:02 Hello, how are you?
    3:37 Wow! Exciting
    4:50 Ending
    • What are you up to this weekend?
    6:32

  • @Golfpro411
    @Golfpro411 7 лет назад +215

    im a dude watchin this lol, i got some difficult people at work

    • @Doobd6
      @Doobd6 6 лет назад +5

      HypedUPTV she dint say it was not for dudes ‘LOL’

    • @Stonefactor
      @Stonefactor 6 лет назад +1

      Lol, it's for everyone lips.

    • @dreamsaresharedhere_
      @dreamsaresharedhere_ 6 лет назад +10

      what does gender have to do with this?

    • @starkmakingrad1914
      @starkmakingrad1914 6 лет назад +1

      Obviously it was two women having a discussion, it *must have* been advice for women only. 🙄

    • @gideonovie9850
      @gideonovie9850 6 лет назад

      Stark Making Rad 😉 hey! How are you?

  • @USMC_BABE38
    @USMC_BABE38 2 года назад

    This is so helpful especially when I suffer from social anxiety and I struggle to be able to talk to others without anxiety in my voice