If it’s confusing to you, take it as a no. This is so important in many levels: We’re done waiting around for anything, in the last years, we learnt to realize our worth. Now it’s time to thrive, anything that truly wants you and belongs to you, you will have. The only prize is this: you have to let go of anything that doesn’t serve you. Make room for the blessings to come in! 2020, here we come! ✨
@Clairvoyante Exposing may do something but at the end of the day. I think we should prepare women to be mindful of those types of men and never give our time to them.
Here’s a tip: A mans feelings towards you is none of your business. In other words, don’t go searching for answers, other women, or a sense of validation. Worry about you! If he wants you, it will be crystal clear.
Correct. At the same time, don't allow him to waste your time. Too many men don't want to give you any clarity or make a commitment because they're holding out for what they really want, which isn't you. However, they will gladly take up your time and use your body and emotions for entertainment. I don't think so.
This video is everything I needed right now. He isn’t my safe place I can’t even open up to him because he is hot and cold. I’m done, I’m starting the new year correct
@@gracieecreations the sad thing is that some of them think it's what they want until faced with the opportunities to put it into action then they get stage fright. Its so final for them that they start to doubt if it's really you they want etc. You're right actions speak louder, never get clouded by words alone. At times I don't even think they are convinced of their own words. 😩😆
I’ve learned that especially before marriage your dating should be flawless! What do you really have to fight about yet?! No money mixed, not living together, no family decisions to make! If there is trouble before marriage RUN!!!
I've been in a 4 month situationship, I'll take this video as a final sign to let him go before 2020 starts. It's for sure not going to be an easy process I know I'll be crying a lot but Breeny is right, I have to fully trust in God and let him guide me. Update: So it's been 4 months later and uhhh we're dating now...I'm sorry for the disappointment guys. :( Learn from my mistake, don't be like me lol please save yourself and your sanity. Another update: We broke up. I ended it. he picked up his things 2 days ago from my house. I pray that God heals me fast and takes me away from depression.
So true. Better to end it at 4 months then to end it after a year or 2 after realizing you wasted your time on someone who didnt take you seriously from week 2. I had to let go of someone in may as well, at first it hurt but now looking back I see I dodged a bullet. He might like you, but if he doesn't want to commit to you, he won't commit to you. Make yourself proud Reian, show your strength and standards even if it hurts. Come June next year, you will be over this mess and incredibly proud of yourself.
If he likes you he is gonna pursue you, just step aside and go on with your life until he gives clear definitions of where the relationship is headed..
How to know if he wants you; his actions. Also keep in mind, if you've just began talking to a guy, you're just dating..... ( take it easy) Enjoy the process, no expectations, but stay on guard. Guys need space to process their feelings. Sometimes space is needed, let him miss you.
should i be worried if he hasnt talked to me in a few days (we havent went on a date) we plan to later this month. should i be worried? he facetimed me on valentines night but havent talked all weekend.
I think it's just hard to let go of the guy because you just really hope they'll change or "that's their way of showing affection" but at the end of the day as you said love shouldn't hurt or be hard we shouldn't feel like we're hard to love because we're not Thanks for your content it means a lot to me
You're absolutely right! It can be VERY hard to let go. Usually it may help to let go progressively but as wholly and quickly as you can. We always want them to change, we make excuses, accept less, etc but ultimately YES a good person deserves a good person AND deserves real love that doesn't hurt or isn't back- breaking hard. Its possible, it's out there. May YOU get yours! ❤❤❤❤. It could start with letting go.
Talking about the future with you is not a guarantee coz I have encountered some who manipulate you with future promises and plans and does nothing in the present
Yep its true.. The only hard and fast rule is that you ha e to go off I tuition.. Alot of men can say what ever.. Self love is really about K owing your own heart so well you can just feel fake people from real people.. Thats it
Everything you said was so true. I dated a guy some time ago and he left no room for doubt in my mind. He made it apparent that he wanted me and even those around me saw how much he wanted me. Unfortunately God didn’t give me eyes for him so although I tried to reciprocate the energy it just wasn’t genuine so I didn’t waste his time anymore he will be a great husband one day. Said all that to say that ever since I’ve dated him I now know how it feels for someone to really like you and want you so I don’t put up with inconsistency and confusion anymore I save so much time, energy, and mind space because it’s free from questions of us he into me or not.
So glad I’m not the only one who went through this. The thing is, when someone does put all their energy and effort into me, I’m kind of turned off by it. Sometimes it’s too much! But I’m always attracted and want the ones that don’t want me. It’s so messed up 😓
Aliza M do your research on attachment theory it helped me understand why I rejected the ones that wanted me and chase the ones that didn’t. I’m now dating someone that does above and beyond my expectations and I’m learning that it’s okay to receive the love and respect I know I deserve even if I don’t have the initial “spark”. Our brains are so used to the drama of the chase that when we are being pursued we aren’t excited about it. Hope this helps you even more!
@@celestestringer4899 omg celeste I would love to talk to you about this topic more in depth. feel free to message me on here or @camila_vvv on Instagram. I'm going through a similar situation right now:(
I was in a grey area with a guy at the start of the year. He would text me good morning everyday, say sweet things and ask me how my day was but he wouldn’t arrange plans to see me because he was “so busy” but still had time to see his friends! Then eventually after a couple of weeks he stopped talking to me and changed his photos on a dating app (which he knew I could see) which really hurt as he made me get attached to him so I think maybe he just liked the attention I gave him. Big lesson I’ve learnt this year is to be careful with my feelings in the beginning and only invest in a guy based on how much he is investing into me. Also actions speak louder than words!
TRUE BUT ONLY SOME HAS BEEN ENLIGHTEN LIKE ME I BELIEVE U SHOULDN'T JUST WAIT TIL HE MAKE HIS MIND UP TO BE WITH U BUT TO MARRY U HELL A LOT MAKE THERE MIND TO JUST BE WITH US BUT LOOK THATS NOTHIN TO JUST BE MAKIN A VIDEO ABOUT I MEAN MARRIAGE IS MORE IMPORTANT IN GOD EYES THEN ANY OF THIS JUST SAYIN 🤷♀️
Didnt need to watch past 1:20. (But i did to support) never will I lose another night of sleep on a no good spineless man who cannot take steps forward with intention. Amen.
Yesss Breeny I love how you empower women to know what to look for in healthy relationships. Men will do any and everything to get a woman they truly see a future with. Ladies make sure you pay attention there are no mixed signals.
Damn everything you said was so true: “guys are very intentional”, “mr. Wrong usually comes before me. Right”, consistency, safety, trust, spiritual connection and it’s gotta feel light. I really needed this. I just wanted to say you have helped me this past year and you are glowing. Love that hat and turtle neck 😍🤗🙏🏼 thank you for doing what you do
the toughest relationship is the healthy one after the toxic one; I’m talking to a guy friend of mine from high school who’s seen me date my 1st bf (my high school sweetheart) of 3 years and he’s been there for me throughout my toxic ex (my 2nd bf).. watching this video because I forgot what a healthy relationship felt like, but everything you said just gave me more reassurance ❤️
12:48 "God has so much better for you, and you cannot be so desperate that you'd rather hold onto something that's not working, than let it go-" YES, YES, YES. Preach it Breeny!
Love how you explain everything about men very thoroughly, but it's very hard for a real and genuine person coming to you. At first the ones who you'll meet will want to use you.
Many want to use but not everyone, guard your heart ( be careful NOT to gate it) there is STILL genuine people AND real love in the world. May both find you ijn
If he moves like he's single he is neither " single in his mind" OR he's NOT ready. Something we perceive certain actions as them making it CLEAR they want us and it's often him playing the role or our own desire/ want of that particular man or relationship and at times just wanting a relationship. Consistency is the TRUE mark of his genuine DESIRE and LOVE. Commitment, and communication. ❤😍🙌
@@nickandchrismom well when I say make it clear I mean they tell you they wanna be in a committed relationship with you. Also when I say move as a single im not talking about talking to other females but yes the whole communication thing. Maybe they aren't truly ready either way im done.
@@nickandchrismom consistency and progression. I've had a consistent man but with little progress and this fell through. You're right a man who is serious will always want to keep showing you he is.x
This came at a great time! I started dating the man of my dreams. I was so paranoid and cautious but I do feel very on all levels. I have no doubt about us at all. Mr. Wrong came at me right before my current partner and I had my guard up but I'm slowly taking down the walls. Thank you so much breeny love ya. 😚
The extra sign was when there was a serious issue that involved him expressing himself, he chose to keep those emotions from me. Created friction. I got tired of not knowing where he was emotionally and getting attacked with excuses when I tried to help him open up.🤷🏾♀️🌝 All the signs you talked about..the ex didn't display And I kinda knew but I guess I just accepted for the sake of being comfortable at the time.
Same situation. And then they make you feel bad for not being able to open up to you 🤔 if I'm not that person for you, if it's so hard for you to open up to me, after I'm open with you but you refuse, then why are you wasting your time with me??? Cause he's bored.
This video is literally nothing but facts!!! All these are red flags in a serious relationships, but you often find people ignoring them and still trying to pursue something. Truly if a man wants you he will make it known 100%. I really love the inconsistency leads to insecurity part, because that is sooo true and I've never heard it put that way. If a man is not being consistent about what he wants, then you're wasting your time honestly. Don't spend time wondering why he's not reciprocating, it's time to move on. But definitely easier said than done.
He was the one talking about marriage and kids. He even gave me the year. He was clear. He wanted his situation together, giving himself 3 years and then marriage and all. He was even mad when I first didnt react to this. Then he left with a "I'm not ready for a relationship"...
Aww I've been off RUclips for a while and when I heard you say "me and my partner" I felt so much joy. Not because you were any less of a person single, but I'm just so happy that you waited to get what you know you deserve, and you did! Forever rooting for you sis❤❤❤
I feel you girl! I dated someone over 4 years and really taught he was the one. He has all the qualities I ever wanted and I am scared I will ever find anyone better than him or the same as him. But I had to let him go cause I can't take him to the next year. I am gonna let God take over and focus on myself.
im dating multiple men. one of them started being inconsistent and i fell back. he goes and starts blowing up my phone. asking me whats wrong, am i ok. i fell back all the way. it feels good not being invested.
So interesting Jessica, I read an article explaining the push-pull technique that men use. If he sees you're hard to get he backs away cause he is trying to get you to panic and work for his love again. You did so well Jessica! Well done! He tried to play mind games and you just dropped him. You're so strong, keep it up. You don't need some inconsistent guy in any case.
L S inconsistent with my standards. Going hot and cold, attempting to use pick up tactics with me. Telling me with his words he wants to see me more but his actions did not follow. Love bombing in the beginning, and getting me use to his consistency, to decrease it all of a sudden due to “him dating and working”. I told him kindly, I am dating others and still have respect for everyone and their time. I am not an afterthought and will not be treated as such. I have 3 others who are doing just fine. His loss.
@@jessicat2304 Energy! Engergy Energy! Letting go and moving on is the biggest super power. I'm currently working on channelling that spirit too because it's something I really struggled with. But at the end of the day, it just got me used for some guys ego boost who didnt even really want to commit to me to begin with. That's why I'm super inspired by your story. We really do need to expect and do better going forward because we are worthy of good intentions and genuine love.
Brenny thank you! For real, when someone doesn't like you they will do the bare minimum to maintain a hold on you. I have seen though, when the guy who likes you, likes they will relentlessly pursue you. Even, when things pick up and you are seeing each other, they will continue to check up on you. Reassure you, tell you if they cannot talk to you, make sure that you know they will be calling you. They will always want to see you fact! Always following through with plans and everything. It's mind blowing tbh
Breeny, your wisdom is so valuable to all women. When I feel like my standards could start to slip because of loneliness, your videos help me pull it together! Thank you!
This Is sooo true . Men are very simple creatures. They pursue and they invest their time , energy and money in things they value and want! Therefore , If you ain’t getting any of that from him, sis , let that man go !!
Everything is spot on. I don’t want to play games with anyone at all. A part of me is still trying to hold on to the “words” about change even though I don’t see the actions to match. I’m so annoyed!
Let go if the words and actions don't line up. Greater IS coming! Trust that you're worth the real deal, you're worth the effort, the time, the communication, the committed, the friendship AND the CHASE, men chase us. ❤😍. Guard don't gate your heart. Let him go and release him in forgiveness.
i was dating guys who put on an act for a few months (and although yellow and red flags appeared) their true colors surface... i am now “delivert” 😂😂😂 i COMPLETELY trust God in this area for directions and instructions when i date...
I want to take a moment and say thank you to you! I come to your channel very often to remind myself and reassure myself that things will be ok even after 12yrs with a man and no ring and left with a broken heart and a child we shared together isn’t easy! Thank you Breeny for your kind wonderful videos to let us women know we can make it! Have faith
This was really helpful! Kind of had a lightbulb moment when you said "if he want you, he will plan for you in his life". I fell really hard for my ex and it always felt like it was a one sided thing. I was even thinking of telling him I still loved him 🤦🏻♀️. It's easy to forget the bad in the relationship, but if he wanted me back he would have let a girl know by now lol. Thank you!! This new year I'm 👏moving 👏 on 👏.
Honestly, I wish I would have found out about this channel earlier in 2019! I’ve honestly gone through so much, and everytime I watch your videos, I am so encouraged because I know that what is meant in my life will be in my life and that God is working everything for good! Thank you so much for your platform Breeny!!!! Much love from California ❤️❤️❤️
I needed this! Your videos always help me. Seriously this is so true. that’s why I’m only going to invest once I see a guy who will invest in me. I’m tired of being used. I know my worth. Good things coming for 2020 ✨
hey , I usually don't comment but I just wanted to say thank you ! not only for the good advices and confidence you've given me , (I'm a darkskin girl and I was very confused about me in general , talking about beauty and self confidence , and your channel has helped me soooooo much , you're like the big sister I never had ) but you also helped with my english (I'm from a french country) . thanks to your videos I really improved my english (something I always wanted to do lol) , I've been able to join something useful an fun thanks to you so..thank you ! :)
Great video, as always awesome content! I love this. " Take the mixed signal as a no." Greatest advice! So many times we women experience confusion via a grey area, uncertainty, or mixed signals from a guy, we use it to distract us, delude us, hold on deeper or longer. I think you're right. If you're confused or uncertain it's a NO for him. Thx ❤🙌😍
Thanks for the video Breeny. I totally agree and I have to say that the most important thing is if he is consistent. I have been with a lot of "talkers" who said it all and made all the plans but it was just empty words. Do not let these kind of grown boys waste your time!
I saw these signs in my marriage. Didn't take heed soon enough. I'll keep these things in mind going forward. Working on myself and staying positive. Live and learn
I can literally look back on past relationships or flings and see the same pattern... if a guy wants to be with you, he will make it happen. When my husband and I first started dating, we both knew within 2 months that we wanted to get married and we were on the same wavelength. It wasn’t a struggle (like past relationships) and I can clearly see the counterfeit looking back.
So true Breeny ♥️ this year I've been working on having deal breakers, and instead of wanting someone who doesnt really want me, just because I want to prove to them that I am good enough, I've learned to just let it go. A mans personal preference has nothing to do with my self worth. And I'm at a point where it's not about investing in someone because I really like them, but investing in someone whose investing in me. And theres nothing more powerful than the energy of someone whose willing to let go. Thank you for the encouragement and insight. ♥️
You are truly working in your purpose with these videos. Your messages although not necessarily religious are def anointed. Often times you literally take the thoughts out of my mind. Thanks Sis. 🙏🏽
Men can be very passive aggressive it's difficult to determine what they really want from you and what their true intentions are in a relationship. 🤦🏼🤦🏼
I remember one time I specifically told this guy that I'm looking for a meaningful friendship and the jerk called me the next day &asked me I wonder of you're a virgin" I told him at this rate you will never find out you disgusting jerk, long story short I blocked/deleted his number out of my phone.
I agree to this there's this guy who tell me he like me and I'm the girl he wants to get married but he went on and off me like his only chatting me when he wants or when i posted some cute stuff which is crazy
I appreciate this so much coming from a long distance open relationship. He knows I just want to be with him but he keeps telling me he wants to keep it open just in case. A guy that leaves you wondering and doubting your relationship, isn't worth tying yourself down for
At the beginning he was SAYING everything I wanted to hear.. telling me he wanted marriage etc...then he stopped showing up consistently and would turn up late or change plans and I started to feel like I was being put lower down on his priority list...I told him this...I asked him to start showing up on time and calling me on time...which he did...but NOT CONSISTENTLY..I now know I NEED CONSISTENCY to feel SAFE and SECURE...if I'm asking a guy to step up to my needs...hes not the one for me. Thanks Breeny! God bless!
Consistency and progression ladies. Consistency alone isn't even enough anymore. People can get comfy and be consistent still with no plan of progressing the relationship further. Watch out for these. Xx
This woman tells the truth. As a man it's cringey to watch female dating coaches lie to their sisters about what men want and what to expect in dating. Respect to this beautiful Empress
Please consider that the people you meet are also going through their own rough patches. Sometimes there's more important things than making a woman feel like #1 priority in your life when you have many other uncertainties.
We all know multitasking isn't the average man's strong point. There is nothing wrong in having other uncertainties but one has to question whether he should be dating at all! If you date you are making the choice to reduce your selfishness and attend to another person, if you cannot do this then focus on your other things. X
Once you let go of a man you really thought you wanted, because of his lack of consistency, the rest of them become easier to let go!! Thank you for your time but ✌🏼
![ARGENTINA vs. BOLIVIA [6-0] | RESUMEN | ELIMINATORIAS SUDAMERICANAS | FECHA 10](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/C3wPtKNbAOA/mqdefault.jpg)
Who else loves this amazing woman?
I do!
I love her! She's so smart ❤
Yeah, amazing is the right word. 💖
Not me!
Me kicked out a few guys deleted the wasters its great
If it’s confusing to you, take it as a no.
This is so important in many levels:
We’re done waiting around for anything, in the last years, we learnt to realize our worth. Now it’s time to thrive, anything that truly wants you and belongs to you, you will have. The only prize is this: you have to let go of anything that doesn’t serve you. Make room for the blessings to come in!
2020, here we come!
✨
Rainy Day yaasss🙌👏🥺☺️
Yesss Ameeen💃🏾💃🏾🔥🔥👏🏽👏🏽
Amen, sis! Amen. 😍😍😍
@Clairvoyante Exposing may do something but at the end of the day. I think we should prepare women to be mindful of those types of men and never give our time to them.
Well sais sis !
Step 1: you don't even have the need to watch these kind of videos
yes
Amen
True
Indeed
wow
Here’s a tip: A mans feelings towards you is none of your business. In other words, don’t go searching for answers, other women, or a sense of validation. Worry about you! If he wants you, it will be crystal clear.
Correct. At the same time, don't allow him to waste your time. Too many men don't want to give you any clarity or make a commitment because they're holding out for what they really want, which isn't you. However, they will gladly take up your time and use your body and emotions for entertainment. I don't think so.
“And you can’t be so desperate that you’d rather hold onto something that’s not working than let it go” 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼🗣🗣🗣🗣🗣
I think we all did that once because we loved *that person* how he used to be and want to change him back
On point.
That spoke to me too😭
This video is everything I needed right now. He isn’t my safe place I can’t even open up to him because he is hot and cold. I’m done, I’m starting the new year correct
Sis me too! I'm done with the off and on communication. Glad I deleted his messages. Goodbye.
Sounds about fearful avoidant attachment.
Great observation sis! Walk in your peace! Joy awaits!
Yes sis
As soon as you stop giving him attention, someone better has space to come in. X
There are many who "plan and talk future" with you so that doesn't mean much🤷🏽♀️🤷🏽♀️. The only one that works is CONSISTENCY.
Redrose Abd exactly
Oh my God, I've been saying the same things to my girlfriends.
Thank you!! I no longer get flattered by people talking marriage plans with no real tangible evidence that they are ready.. ANNNOYYYYYYING
@@gracieecreations the sad thing is that some of them think it's what they want until faced with the opportunities to put it into action then they get stage fright. Its so final for them that they start to doubt if it's really you they want etc. You're right actions speak louder, never get clouded by words alone. At times I don't even think they are convinced of their own words. 😩😆
So true. Actions above words, and test him out. Let him prove what he says through his actions
Inconsistency makes you feel insecure..whew so true! Consistency is the key 🔑
I’ve learned that especially before marriage your dating should be flawless! What do you really have to fight about yet?! No money mixed, not living together, no family decisions to make! If there is trouble before marriage RUN!!!
So true
Amen
Too true
Right!!!
No 50/50
"how many more reminders do you need to have until you finally let this relationship go"
BREENY REALLY CAME FOR ME 😭😭😭😭
Ella Sarol 🤣🤣🤣 I left him in 2019
“Inconsistency makes you feel insecure” so true
I've been in a 4 month situationship, I'll take this video as a final sign to let him go before 2020 starts. It's for sure not going to be an easy process I know I'll be crying a lot but Breeny is right, I have to fully trust in God and let him guide me.
Update:
So it's been 4 months later and uhhh we're dating now...I'm sorry for the disappointment guys. :( Learn from my mistake, don't be like me lol please save yourself and your sanity.
Another update: We broke up. I ended it. he picked up his things 2 days ago from my house. I pray that God heals me fast and takes me away from depression.
So true. Better to end it at 4 months then to end it after a year or 2 after realizing you wasted your time on someone who didnt take you seriously from week 2. I had to let go of someone in may as well, at first it hurt but now looking back I see I dodged a bullet. He might like you, but if he doesn't want to commit to you, he won't commit to you. Make yourself proud Reian, show your strength and standards even if it hurts. Come June next year, you will be over this mess and incredibly proud of yourself.
Nadia G You’re so right ahh. Thank you lots Nadia for your encouraging words and good to know that I’m not alone on this!
proud of u girl. sometimes letting go is the best way to grow as a being
C 62 thank you :’)
Marina A Thank you lots
If he likes you he is gonna pursue you, just step aside and go on with your life until he gives clear definitions of where the relationship is headed..
How to know if he wants you; his actions. Also keep in mind, if you've just began talking to a guy, you're just dating..... ( take it easy)
Enjoy the process, no expectations, but stay on guard. Guys need space to process their feelings. Sometimes space is needed, let him miss you.
should i be worried if he hasnt talked to me in a few days (we havent went on a date) we plan to later this month. should i be worried? he facetimed me on valentines night but havent talked all weekend.
@@samarztk You shouldn't be worried about him at all. Don't worry about him. And don't do more than he is. Match his level of effort or do less....
Love thisss!!
When the actions and words don’t meet and are parallel to each other
True, end it, get out if there us no reciprocity or effort or if the word and deed differ too much. Let go
Co-parenting with a narcissist 101 literally just left my boyfriend for this reason
Honey, I had to laugh so hard to your comment, cos this is actually what I experienced for the past few days...this is so true
Damn right, :) they never gonna meet :) :)
I think it's just hard to let go of the guy because you just really hope they'll change or "that's their way of showing affection" but at the end of the day as you said love shouldn't hurt or be hard we shouldn't feel like we're hard to love because we're not
Thanks for your content it means a lot to me
You're absolutely right! It can be VERY hard to let go. Usually it may help to let go progressively but as wholly and quickly as you can. We always want them to change, we make excuses, accept less, etc but ultimately YES a good person deserves a good person AND deserves real love that doesn't hurt or isn't back- breaking hard. Its possible, it's out there. May YOU get yours! ❤❤❤❤. It could start with letting go.
Exactly we are not hard to love. They are just fucked up and let them be over THERE lol
read how to get over a boy by chidera egguere.
Talking about the future with you is not a guarantee coz I have encountered some who manipulate you with future promises and plans and does nothing in the present
Yeah, look at actions and test words that's what wise women do. ♥️
Yep its true.. The only hard and fast rule is that you ha e to go off I tuition.. Alot of men can say what ever.. Self love is really about K owing your own heart so well you can just feel fake people from real people.. Thats it
@@kkibela I agree for sure
I'm 1 minute in and feeling like I'm about to have my whole world rearranged with these facts.
Everything you said was so true. I dated a guy some time ago and he left no room for doubt in my mind. He made it apparent that he wanted me and even those around me saw how much he wanted me. Unfortunately God didn’t give me eyes for him so although I tried to reciprocate the energy it just wasn’t genuine so I didn’t waste his time anymore he will be a great husband one day. Said all that to say that ever since I’ve dated him I now know how it feels for someone to really like you and want you so I don’t put up with inconsistency and confusion anymore I save so much time, energy, and mind space because it’s free from questions of us he into me or not.
So glad I’m not the only one who went through this. The thing is, when someone does put all their energy and effort into me, I’m kind of turned off by it. Sometimes it’s too much! But I’m always attracted and want the ones that don’t want me. It’s so messed up 😓
Aliza M do your research on attachment theory it helped me understand why I rejected the ones that wanted me and chase the ones that didn’t. I’m now dating someone that does above and beyond my expectations and I’m learning that it’s okay to receive the love and respect I know I deserve even if I don’t have the initial “spark”. Our brains are so used to the drama of the chase that when we are being pursued we aren’t excited about it. Hope this helps you even more!
@@celestestringer4899 omg celeste I would love to talk to you about this topic more in depth. feel free to message me on here or @camila_vvv on Instagram. I'm going through a similar situation right now:(
I was in a grey area with a guy at the start of the year. He would text me good morning everyday, say sweet things and ask me how my day was but he wouldn’t arrange plans to see me because he was “so busy” but still had time to see his friends! Then eventually after a couple of weeks he stopped talking to me and changed his photos on a dating app (which he knew I could see) which really hurt as he made me get attached to him so I think maybe he just liked the attention I gave him. Big lesson I’ve learnt this year is to be careful with my feelings in the beginning and only invest in a guy based on how much he is investing into me. Also actions speak louder than words!
I can relate to this story girl! Drop it like it hot
Sounds like he did you a favor. people show you who they are. Just listen.
I think I’m currently in this situation I’m gonna end it
I think a video on faith and your religious journey would be so inspiring
Agreed, we must share our testimonies. The world needs more LIGHT.
TRUE BUT ONLY SOME HAS BEEN ENLIGHTEN LIKE ME I BELIEVE U SHOULDN'T JUST WAIT TIL HE MAKE HIS MIND UP TO BE WITH U BUT TO MARRY U HELL A LOT MAKE THERE MIND TO JUST BE WITH US BUT LOOK THATS NOTHIN TO JUST BE MAKIN A VIDEO ABOUT I MEAN MARRIAGE IS MORE IMPORTANT IN GOD EYES THEN ANY OF THIS JUST SAYIN 🤷♀️
Didnt need to watch past 1:20. (But i did to support) never will I lose another night of sleep on a no good spineless man who cannot take steps forward with intention. Amen.
Yesss Breeny I love how you empower women to know what to look for in healthy relationships. Men will do any and everything to get a woman they truly see a future with. Ladies make sure you pay attention there are no mixed signals.
Damn everything you said was so true: “guys are very intentional”, “mr. Wrong usually comes before me. Right”, consistency, safety, trust, spiritual connection and it’s gotta feel light. I really needed this. I just wanted to say you have helped me this past year and you are glowing. Love that hat and turtle neck 😍🤗🙏🏼 thank you for doing what you do
the toughest relationship is the healthy one after the toxic one; I’m talking to a guy friend of mine from high school who’s seen me date my 1st bf (my high school sweetheart) of 3 years and he’s been there for me throughout my toxic ex (my 2nd bf).. watching this video because I forgot what a healthy relationship felt like, but everything you said just gave me more reassurance ❤️
Lol my man left me a couple days ago right before my last finals. Much needed
A man that loves you he will not leave
Especially not before the last finals... he doesmt thing about you or what's important for you. My ex did this.
Greater IS coming! ❤ keep striving in school!
@@Kanatshi it made you wiser ❤
Gol Dyy you will kick ass in your finals and you will meet someone who won’t ever leave ❤️❤️❤️
12:48 "God has so much better for you, and you cannot be so desperate that you'd rather hold onto something that's not working, than let it go-" YES, YES, YES. Preach it Breeny!
Love how you explain everything about men very thoroughly, but it's very hard for a real and genuine person coming to you.
At first the ones who you'll meet will want to use you.
I'm afraid of getting into a relationship with a psychopath/sociopath.🤦🏼
Many want to use but not everyone, guard your heart ( be careful NOT to gate it) there is STILL genuine people AND real love in the world. May both find you ijn
@@sophiadavenport3959 don't fear, guard your heart and look for the signs.. research to be informed don't let it play tricks on your mind. ❤😍
I hate the gray area though. Like they make it clear they want you but you feel like he moves like a single.
If he moves like he's single he is neither " single in his mind" OR he's NOT ready. Something we perceive certain actions as them making it CLEAR they want us and it's often him playing the role or our own desire/ want of that particular man or relationship and at times just wanting a relationship. Consistency is the TRUE mark of his genuine DESIRE and LOVE. Commitment, and communication. ❤😍🙌
@@nickandchrismom well when I say make it clear I mean they tell you they wanna be in a committed relationship with you. Also when I say move as a single im not talking about talking to other females but yes the whole communication thing. Maybe they aren't truly ready either way im done.
@@nickandchrismom consistency and progression. I've had a consistent man but with little progress and this fell through. You're right a man who is serious will always want to keep showing you he is.x
@@ElleChi24 I absolutely agree, I've been there as well.
@@Truckeractivityy ah I get you now. Thx
I am living for this series. Breeny just giving us back to back content. Love it
Yes, great content, important topic.
This came at a great time! I started dating the man of my dreams. I was so paranoid and cautious but I do feel very on all levels. I have no doubt about us at all. Mr. Wrong came at me right before my current partner and I had my guard up but I'm slowly taking down the walls. Thank you so much breeny love ya. 😚
The extra sign was when there was a serious issue that involved him expressing himself, he chose to keep those emotions from me. Created friction. I got tired of not knowing where he was emotionally and getting attacked with excuses when I tried to help him open up.🤷🏾♀️🌝
All the signs you talked about..the ex didn't display
And I kinda knew but I guess I just accepted for the sake of being comfortable at the time.
Same situation. And then they make you feel bad for not being able to open up to you 🤔 if I'm not that person for you, if it's so hard for you to open up to me, after I'm open with you but you refuse, then why are you wasting your time with me??? Cause he's bored.
@@mireya5838 exactly!!
do women even ask themselves if they are interested in the men??? Part of his equation... but what about your equation?
Yeah
Queens assemble for some words of wisdom👏🏽
I agree with you 100% because when a man wants you he will go after you if not sis tell him Bye!
This video is literally nothing but facts!!! All these are red flags in a serious relationships, but you often find people ignoring them and still trying to pursue something. Truly if a man wants you he will make it known 100%.
I really love the inconsistency leads to insecurity part, because that is sooo true and I've never heard it put that way. If a man is not being consistent about what he wants, then you're wasting your time honestly. Don't spend time wondering why he's not reciprocating, it's time to move on. But definitely easier said than done.
He was the one talking about marriage and kids. He even gave me the year. He was clear. He wanted his situation together, giving himself 3 years and then marriage and all. He was even mad when I first didnt react to this. Then he left with a "I'm not ready for a relationship"...
"When is right is light"... I am in pitch darkness :((((
Aww I've been off RUclips for a while and when I heard you say "me and my partner" I felt so much joy. Not because you were any less of a person single, but I'm just so happy that you waited to get what you know you deserve, and you did! Forever rooting for you sis❤❤❤
I KNOW I felt the same way 😊
I feel you girl! I dated someone over 4 years and really taught he was the one. He has all the qualities I ever wanted and I am scared I will ever find anyone better than him or the same as him. But I had to let him go cause I can't take him to the next year. I am gonna let God take over and focus on myself.
If a man wants you he will tell you and show you,if not let it go.
ugh your videos are like the slap in the face i need always lol
Adriana Anastasia lol right! it literally wakes me up from whatever deep ass nap I was apparently in 😳😂
im dating multiple men. one of them started being inconsistent and i fell back. he goes and starts blowing up my phone. asking me whats wrong, am i ok. i fell back all the way. it feels good not being invested.
So interesting Jessica, I read an article explaining the push-pull technique that men use. If he sees you're hard to get he backs away cause he is trying to get you to panic and work for his love again. You did so well Jessica! Well done! He tried to play mind games and you just dropped him. You're so strong, keep it up. You don't need some inconsistent guy in any case.
Girl in what way was he being inconsistent??
L S inconsistent with my standards. Going hot and cold, attempting to use pick up tactics with me.
Telling me with his words he wants to see me more but his actions did not follow.
Love bombing in the beginning, and getting me use to his consistency, to decrease it all of a sudden due to “him dating and working”.
I told him kindly, I am dating others and still have respect for everyone and their time. I am not an afterthought and will not be treated as such.
I have 3 others who are doing just fine. His loss.
@@jessicat2304 Energy! Engergy Energy! Letting go and moving on is the biggest super power. I'm currently working on channelling that spirit too because it's something I really struggled with. But at the end of the day, it just got me used for some guys ego boost who didnt even really want to commit to me to begin with. That's why I'm super inspired by your story. We really do need to expect and do better going forward because we are worthy of good intentions and genuine love.
@@LS-cj8jd none
I love that. Clear mind, clear soul, clear conscious. Clarity for 2020.
Some guys will make you feel like you’re part of their future 😭😭 but will still break your heart.
Brenny thank you! For real, when someone doesn't like you they will do the bare minimum to maintain a hold on you. I have seen though, when the guy who likes you, likes they will relentlessly pursue you. Even, when things pick up and you are seeing each other, they will continue to check up on you. Reassure you, tell you if they cannot talk to you, make sure that you know they will be calling you. They will always want to see you fact! Always following through with plans and everything. It's mind blowing tbh
I'm in actual tears. Thank you Breeny. You've made my day. I'm in the healing process so this video is so encouraging. 😘
Breeny, your wisdom is so valuable to all women. When I feel like my standards could start to slip because of loneliness, your videos help me pull it together! Thank you!
This Is sooo true . Men are very simple creatures. They pursue and they invest their time , energy and money in things they value and want! Therefore , If you ain’t getting any of that from him, sis , let that man go !!
Everything is spot on. I don’t want to play games with anyone at all. A part of me is still trying to hold on to the “words” about change even though I don’t see the actions to match. I’m so annoyed!
Let go if the words and actions don't line up. Greater IS coming! Trust that you're worth the real deal, you're worth the effort, the time, the communication, the committed, the friendship AND the CHASE, men chase us. ❤😍. Guard don't gate your heart. Let him go and release him in forgiveness.
It’s mad how the universe and god knows I need these videos
Ali A lmaoo the Universe isn’t God though ! It’s part of creation just like you and me
i was dating guys who put on an act for a few months (and although yellow and red flags appeared) their true colors surface... i am now “delivert” 😂😂😂 i COMPLETELY trust God in this area for directions and instructions when i date...
"Take a mixed signal as a no!" Yup. Thats why i need Breeny. 😂
I want to take a moment and say thank you to you! I come to your channel very often to remind myself and reassure myself that things will be ok even after 12yrs with a man and no ring and left with a broken heart and a child we shared together isn’t easy! Thank you Breeny for your kind wonderful videos to let us women know we can make it! Have faith
That notification button is something else ❤️
This video proved everything I already knew. Taking this message and walking away from men that make me feel uncertain.
I’m so early! I love your videos, you got me more close to God in my depression
Breeny I am LOVING this dating series! Could you do a video on how to keep a guy on his toes please? 🤍
@@ladylorp5436 Do you have a link? Or is this a p---t--e?
This was really helpful! Kind of had a lightbulb moment when you said "if he want you, he will plan for you in his life". I fell really hard for my ex and it always felt like it was a one sided thing. I was even thinking of telling him I still loved him 🤦🏻♀️. It's easy to forget the bad in the relationship, but if he wanted me back he would have let a girl know by now lol. Thank you!! This new year I'm 👏moving 👏 on 👏.
Can you please do a video on how to heal from trauma
It's so true. If you get more of a thrill from wondering than actually knowing he probably doesn't like you sis.
Honestly, I wish I would have found out about this channel earlier in 2019! I’ve honestly gone through so much, and everytime I watch your videos, I am so encouraged because I know that what is meant in my life will be in my life and that God is working everything for good! Thank you so much for your platform Breeny!!!! Much love from California ❤️❤️❤️
I needed this! Your videos always help me. Seriously this is so true. that’s why I’m only going to invest once I see a guy who will invest in me. I’m tired of being used. I know my worth. Good things coming for 2020 ✨
Thank you! “When it’s right it’s light”
hey ,
I usually don't comment but I just wanted to say thank you !
not only for the good advices and confidence you've given me , (I'm a darkskin girl and I was very confused about me in general , talking about beauty and self confidence , and your channel has helped me soooooo much , you're like the big sister I never had )
but you also helped with my english (I'm from a french country) . thanks to your videos I really improved my english (something I always wanted to do lol) , I've been able to join something useful an fun thanks to you
so..thank you ! :)
“ If he loves you you’ll know, if he doesn’t you’ll be confused “
Great video, as always awesome content! I love this. " Take the mixed signal as a no." Greatest advice! So many times we women experience confusion via a grey area, uncertainty, or mixed signals from a guy, we use it to distract us, delude us, hold on deeper or longer. I think you're right. If you're confused or uncertain it's a NO for him. Thx ❤🙌😍
Thanks for the video Breeny.
I totally agree and I have to say that the most important thing is if he is consistent. I have been with a lot of "talkers" who said it all and made all the plans but it was just empty words. Do not let these kind of grown boys waste your time!
I really really really need to hear this. I think I’ve watched every single video on your channel but this is it
I saw these signs in my marriage. Didn't take heed soon enough. I'll keep these things in mind going forward. Working on myself and staying positive. Live and learn
I can literally look back on past relationships or flings and see the same pattern... if a guy wants to be with you, he will make it happen. When my husband and I first started dating, we both knew within 2 months that we wanted to get married and we were on the same wavelength. It wasn’t a struggle (like past relationships) and I can clearly see the counterfeit looking back.
Girls listen to this AMAZING WOMAN. She is right. You need to LET IT GO AND LOVE YOURSELF
Your voice is all I needed in my life. Thanks.
Moving too quickly !!!!! Then being inconsistent
lovebombing
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂freedom
Thank you sooo much sis. Inconsistent behavior has been a major red flag for me. Once i see that, i am out!!!
There is so much truth in your words, you put things in to perspective. When a guy wants" you" he will talk and walk ... wow
babygirl you talk so much sense love you boo if a guy wants you he will show you no doubt what so ever you just now when it’s genuine never settle boo
So true Breeny ♥️ this year I've been working on having deal breakers, and instead of wanting someone who doesnt really want me, just because I want to prove to them that I am good enough, I've learned to just let it go. A mans personal preference has nothing to do with my self worth. And I'm at a point where it's not about investing in someone because I really like them, but investing in someone whose investing in me. And theres nothing more powerful than the energy of someone whose willing to let go. Thank you for the encouragement and insight. ♥️
the last boy i went on 4 dates with left my with doubts - new boy has me the most assured ever (like in my life) after just 2 dates. wow!
I love the way you glow when you talk about your partner Breeny Lee❤️🧡💛💚💙💜
You are truly working in your purpose with these videos. Your messages although not necessarily religious are def anointed. Often times you literally take the thoughts out of my mind. Thanks Sis. 🙏🏽
I’m so happy for you. I found you through the why I’m single/celibate videos
Men can be very passive aggressive it's difficult to determine what they really want from you and what their true intentions are in a relationship. 🤦🏼🤦🏼
I remember one time I specifically told this guy that I'm looking for a meaningful friendship and the jerk called me the next day &asked me I wonder of you're a virgin" I told him at this rate you will never find out you disgusting jerk, long story short I blocked/deleted his number out of my phone.
Patricia tha bibliophile 👏🏿
This is completely off topic but You are so gorgeous!
@@samanthadeutch927 I appreciate your kind words thank you very much!🐨💕
I agree to this there's this guy who tell me he like me and I'm the girl he wants to get married but he went on and off me like his only chatting me when he wants or when i posted some cute stuff which is crazy
I appreciate this so much coming from a long distance open relationship. He knows I just want to be with him but he keeps telling me he wants to keep it open just in case. A guy that leaves you wondering and doubting your relationship, isn't worth tying yourself down for
Oh hell no! Don’t Let no man use u up a a fuck buddy. Take ur power bk
You won’t even have to Question it !
I needed to hear that and it needed to sink. If a guy likes you he'll pursue you ...period
At the beginning he was SAYING everything I wanted to hear.. telling me he wanted marriage etc...then he stopped showing up consistently and would turn up late or change plans and I started to feel like I was being put lower down on his priority list...I told him this...I asked him to start showing up on time and calling me on time...which he did...but NOT CONSISTENTLY..I now know I NEED CONSISTENCY to feel SAFE and SECURE...if I'm asking a guy to step up to my needs...hes not the one for me. Thanks Breeny! God bless!
What is meant for you.. will never feel forced ..
So powerful..
Off topic but you look so gorgeous here Breenyxxx thank you so much for this video, you always upload when I need it ahahaxx
Consistency and progression ladies. Consistency alone isn't even enough anymore. People can get comfy and be consistent still with no plan of progressing the relationship further. Watch out for these. Xx
This woman tells the truth. As a man it's cringey to watch female dating coaches lie to their sisters about what men want and what to expect in dating. Respect to this beautiful Empress
When it's right, it's light!!!
Please consider that the people you meet are also going through their own rough patches. Sometimes there's more important things than making a woman feel like #1 priority in your life when you have many other uncertainties.
Then stop or reduce dating and make dealing with those uncertainties a priority.
We all know multitasking isn't the average man's strong point. There is nothing wrong in having other uncertainties but one has to question whether he should be dating at all! If you date you are making the choice to reduce your selfishness and attend to another person, if you cannot do this then focus on your other things. X
Wow Breeny just wow!!😱🤯🤯
You really nailed this one I felt like I was getting my confirmation from God. You are heaven sent!!🙌🏽🙌🏽😍😍
She is so intelligent and wonderful and clear!
Once you let go of a man you really thought you wanted, because of his lack of consistency, the rest of them become easier to let go!! Thank you for your time but ✌🏼
The feeling i get when you post, thats something else
I keep finding guys who are emotionally unavailable. So now I know that I need someone who is a bit softer... It's time for me to change my type.
Oh my god Breeny, I love all your videos. This one I NEEDED. You have such a warm, big hearted energy that makes it so easy to watch all your videos.
Finding a good guy is like hoping your investment in the stock market was worth it. You could get alot of money one day, or lose it all the next.