Hey everyone, we have started a podcast that you can be a part of! If you have an interesting question for Ben and I, please go to ruclips.net/video/mK-ycFRvevc/видео.html and comment . In our next episode, we will respond to some of those questions and shout you out :-)
Is it intentional that you uploaded this video with the exact same title as the one that was about Joe Rogan? (Instead of calling it "How to Deal with Disrespect Without Being a Jerk", or "How to Command Respect Without Being A Jerk, Vol II") You openly stated that you're being experimental with your thumbnail and video title, so I feel like this might be an intentional experiment.
A great fresh topic to cover could be the art of charisma through language barriers. I'm about to embark on my own journey for 2 years abroad, and can't imagine what it's like to authentically connect with people who you can't fully understand or communicate with. I've heard you touch on the subject of enthusiasm as it relates to this, but I think it would be valuable to hear you do a deep dive, given your experience living abroad.
Russell reminds me of a boyfriend I once had. He had an unbelievable ability to call people out on their crap and was able to make them feel REALLY uncomfortable about it. I loved watching him do this. He was always confident and kept his cool. This allowed him to think and say exactly what was needed to be said. He’s passed away now. I miss him every day.
As a child I witnessed a man insult my friend's mother in front of a whole group of her friends. There was a very awkward silence while she just looked at him, then she smiled and said very loudly, 'how very unkind of you to say so', and then she just carried on talking to her friends. The man was totally humiliated and slunk away. Brilliant!
Xlnt recount. As a friend was becoming increasingly more abrasive with me, I suddenly stopped listening respectfully, looked her directly in both eyes, and said coldly " You can never talk this way to me again." It stunned her mid-sentence, she was silent, almost frozen for 8 to 10 seconds as I held eye contact, and she re-animated and said "You're right. I'm sorry, you didn't deserve that." Things have been on a more even keel since then, but we'll see. I don't need an apology nor any capitulation or "a win"...I simply want certain parameters of engagement to be followed when talking with friends. If I wanted a fight, I'd go to a bar, where it's acceptable for conversations to escalate quickly to shouting and insults. But not ever with friends or family. Proximity and emotional investment do not necessarily open the gates to intentional injury or agenda-based attacks. If we are in a relationship where we would normally be open and caring, it is not okay to use that proximity and closeness as a weapon or entree to deeper nerves and more painful attacks, which is exactly what happens in most self- consuming love/hate relationships. Taking advantage of that intimacy to hurt someone is against the rules, and simply, openly shows how immature that person's real feelings are toward the relationship. It is a hard lesson to learn and many relationships don't survive that growth process. Adults still have a need for internal growth, and need to learn the lessons of forgiveness, patience, and perspective with their families, friends, lovers, and even strangers. Simply not accepting bad behavior is a step toward a better relationship. But it can also be a step toward no relationship, too. Some people we just grow away from, or grow out of. Others we grow toward and often, we grow with each other. The garden analogy fits especially well when dealing with weeds and chronically destructive behavior. Encourage fruitful, healthy behavior and relationships, expect little or no returns from weeds and corrosive others. If we give respect, love, compassion, patience and positivity, and get none in return, it may be time for a "lesson"...but likely it's time to "lessen" our own burden and "listen" to our gut...move on. There are far better things to do than to try to change others' behavior and habitual negativity. Fix or forget...like an old car or classic stereo. It doesn't really matter how much you love it, it may be beyond fixing, and you may simply be in love with an image or an idea, rather than the reality. Keep the dream, toss the reality? I love old friends and old cars and hifis. Guess which ones are easier to maintain. Aye, there's the wicket! Cheers!
I've noticed a lot of comedians are good at controlling a room. Most likely from their stand up performances and dealing with hecklers.
5 лет назад+82
I've allowed my difference of opinion to color my views of him in the past. I also used to feel he was overly verbose, putting on airs so to speak, but thanks largely to this channels analysis have come to respect the man's skills.
5 лет назад+35
@@oliviahafner561 too wordy? Eh, we often like least the things in others that we dislike most in ourselves.
Something I heard the other day that I loved, "Love me or hate me, both are in my favor. If you love me I'm in your heart, Hate me and I'm in your head."
Concern with being in someone's head because they hate you can only be a product of ego or malice, while also being affected by the same thing you're claiming
I utilize that technique all the time, it's easier though when you don't care for conversing with most people in the first place, and being an introvert also helps a lot.
I wish I could be more like this, I'm too sensitive. And when someone says something that hurts me I don't know what to do and then hours later I think of what I could've said.
I think the most important thing to do is to take yourself out of the equation, if that makes sense. Focus on the words, but don't associate them with yourself? You have to put distance between what someone says about you and how you perceive it.
Like they’ve said in the narrative several times, remove yourself from your ego...don’t take things personally. Observe what is being said as if they were talking about someone else.
The best advice I ever got from my grandfather and I followed it my whole life is that other people's opinions of you aren't any of your business, even if they tell you to your face.
Russel Brand is levels above them intelligence-wise and they just continued to treat him like a child, all the while he remains professional and mature. Respek
@Sim I think you nailed it. Brand is brilliant in the way of social intelligence. The dude can read a room. I think what makes him brilliant is he takes the stance of a student. He wants to learn and asks far more questions than he does state an opinion. I'm not a massive fan of his comedy, but I love watching interview clips of him because of his social navigation skills.
1. Continue till the end of the sentence 2. Treat each member as an individual - Call their names - 3-second eye contact - calm stare (neither malice nor smile) - not pay attention (use body language) - prolonged silence 3. Emphasize similarities - Call out behavior that u appreciate. Return compliments - be playful - flat-out ignore the rude - pay attention to who respects you. Be loud, engaging with them - a “those type” call out - Flat out call out bad behavior 4. Detach your ego from personal attacks
@@sophiedavidson1579 thank you for the quick synopsis. It's good to see it all written down and sometimes I'm not in a position where I can watch. I'm sure there are others who appreciate this text
“When dealing with people, let us remember we are not dealing with creatures of logic. We are dealing with creatures of emotion, creatures bristling with prejudices and motivated by pride and vanity.” -Dale Carnegie
@@jsj31313jj I'm talking about how the quote talks about how people are creatures of emotion, full of prejudice, pride and vanity as if the one telling the quote isn't a person but a different superior species
@@Litt13F00t Really? It's pretty simple. Other's impressions and expressed thoughts about YOU. Their opinions. Surely you understand, you're a smart person.
@@2degucitas I was attempting a joke going with the idea that without an ego there's not really a "you" in the common sense of the word. Usually "you" or "I" refers to one's ego, so to say you don't have an ego seems like it would imply there is no "you" to be bound by other's opinions, nor is there a you to be freed from them. Its obviously an extreme (I'd say impossible) to say someone doesn't have an ego at all (even if its near entirely removed from the perspective they have of the world) and I think that's what makes this strangely complicated and almost impossible to talk about logically. It's possible there's just been some confusion/misinterpretation though
We're taught to do it as teachers. We call it "the longest turn". When a kid says something smart arsed while your back is turned writing on the board, stop, and do a 10 second turn and stare.
The signals are called that because they are intended to trigger less or more of the behavior the other person is exhibiting. The amount of a behavior isn't countable, so less is correct in this context.
It's not the amount of behaviour, it's the amount of signals. Signals ARE countable. A signal; one signal. The word 'signal' doesn't describe a descrete thing. Behaviour is more abstract. So I'm pretty sure 'fewer' is the most correct word in the context of 'signals'.
1. Finish your sentences. Don't stop midway. 2. Refer everyone by their name. Look at them for 3 seconds when speaking to someone 3. Emphasize similarities with others and complement them. 4. Use non verbal signal. Good signals (smiling at them, complementing them) encourage their behavior. Bad ones (not paying attention to them, giving them uncomfortable looks) tells them to stop something. 5. Call out bad behavior but don't point out the person specifically. Give them the chance to change the behavior. 6. Flat out criticize the behavior if the last one doesn't work. Criticize the behavior, not the person. 7. Detach your ego from personal attacks.
I always do 1 when rude ppl cut me off, but in an Asian country, especially to the elders or in an hierarchical culture/ environment, it's seen as rude. But I'm an Asian and I don't care 😆
Thank you for outlining the bullet points of this video. As a person with brain injury, I don't absorb things as easily as I used to. Having multiple ways to sponge in knowledge is something that I appreciate. Great job!
That whole interview with Russell is a lecture on how to effectively handle a hostile conversation. Definitely one of the best things I have ever seen. Russell is so good at that, it’s unbelievable.
His tactics really only work in a situation where the power dynamic is somewhat balanced, where the person has some level of respect for you or is expected to behave in a reasonably respectful manner.
@@BebeDaullPeople are adaptable. I've seen him on more hostile instances like when he went on Fox, he still handled it well. Never just stay static on one strategy or set of strategies based on specific context, adapt.
I love that three hosts are trying to be cheeky, literally being rude to their guest, think themselves are hilarious- and Russel keeps it so cool. AND now his appearance and their awful behavior is now a teaching video(s) on the internet about how to deal with bullies. Lol
At one point Russell points out how Mika is holding a bottle of water while she was confronting him. I have to say it was kind of sexy and she was blushing.
Detaching from your ego, is the single most important thing you can do to boost your charisma. Most of the behaviors you wish to develop - or get rid of - will naturally be fixed when you aren't concerned with protecting your ego. That's how you become truly authentic.
Truth. Alan Watts said that when the ego is about to be revealed it automatically identifies with your higher self. In other words detaching from the ego, allows you to be your authentic self. All that detachment is, is realizing that the things people may judge or criticize you for, do not define you. Simply not responding to or defending yourself from personal attacks is a way to accomplish this, as Russell does so expertly here.
Authentic in the eyes of the beholder. Your ego is part of you, thus to be truly authentic, it has to be shown. If not, it might be more pleasing to others but it is far from authentic.
This is so useful. As a child I was overrun in every conversation by a narcissistic parent, I never learned this skill and consequently it happens to me in adulthood sometimes and it’s so frustrating and embarrassing. Planning to employ these strategies tout-de-suite.
That happened to my husband, but my narcissistic mother had the opposite effect on me: I cut into and interrupt others so fluidly it just feels like natural conversation. I really thought that's just how I talked to people until I moved out and then visited my mom and sister and realized we don't converse normally at all. It's been a huge point of contention in our relationship.
i love the part where russell looks at him like "oh look at you, you poor little sauasage, asking which i prefer: films standup or TV... asking your little journalist school day one question, arent you adorable thinking you have value and input" fricking hilarious.
It’s because while a lot of people respect Russel he has a very unpopular image that hosts pick up on whether to attract viewers or make the show more enjoyable. I like the guy
I’m a cashier at an estate sale company. So weekly i deal with tons of people who want to pay little to nothing for whatever they have in mind and usually try to talk down to you. I’m glad seeing this video and showed me I actually learned a lot of these practices on my own, such as ignoring rude people and not letting them interrupt my speech. I see others in similar situations say they find themselves checking out emotionally but I do the exact opposite when faced with aggression/ malice I try to to pretend they didn’t say anything but simple facts. Such as when people ask the price of an item and I tell them “$5” they love to respond with something like “$5? I can buy them brand new for that much!” To which I reply we’ll that one is $5. Rather than ignoring them I acknowledge what they said without giving them a single inch toward their statement. I’ve had several people stand next to my register repeatedly asking “why not $3?” And I just ignore them. If I reply it’s “$5” and nothing else. Don’t let people build imaginary power over you! Know your worth
I do this as well. If it's above my pay grade, then I send it to the higher-ups. But damn dealing with people is too much. I'm not at a job where I don't interact as much. I have to take a break for about 10 years, I think😁
Not a Brand fan at all. However those three "interviewers" annoyed me. They were classic bullies, ganging up on someone they thought was an easy mark, bitching about him like he wasn't there. I'm very impressed with his response.
@@natedog69420 Fair question. At the beginning I didn't find him entertaining, funny or likeable. There was a lot of hype around him and I tend to dislike that too. I didn't actively dislike HIM, however, until the puerile "humour" with Andrew Sachs. I am warming to the guy now though. It seems a few years and experiences has knocked lots of rough edges off him. He seems a considered, thoughtful man.
@@rooramblingon895 interesting. I felt the same way about him i think back when i was a teenager and he first popped up. Been listening to him past year or 2 here and there though, more lately. I think hes friggin smart
Russell Brand has higher status than all of the interviewers added together. He remains strong and centered even when he is being treated rudely. Russell never shows fear or anxiety. He floats like a butterfly, stings like a bee.
And calls up old men with Johnathan Ross and humiliated him, which ended with him eventually dying. With them scum bringing him down for their own entertainment 😡
Unfortunately i think the victims of his wit often don’t quite get how much he roasts them and think the opposite has happened. His wit goes past a lot of people who are too caught up in their jealousy and who are trying to bring him down a notch. He is incredibly confident and says what he thinks is true with no apology. This annoys people who feel they can’t say what they want and they become nasty. Sad really.
@rayfighter Seems as though someone's a little touchy about other people having different views than them. Don't take it personally, bro. Not so long ago, people could even be friends whilst holding different views. In this regard, feel free to ask yourself if you're actually the delusional one. Truth hurts but best face it head on. Good luck, brother.
Kat got him mixed up with Willy Brandt, the Chancellor of West Germany in the 60s and 70s. It sounds like the MSNBC people are older than you, and being in the news business, they're likely more familiar with Willy than Russell.
I've actually started to work as a telephone switchboard operator one week ago, and I can testify that the "just stay quiet" mood when tension is building up until the other person feels like she ou he has to say something nice works quite well lmao. I've had people complaining for two minutes straight until they realise that I'm not responding to any of what they are saying, so they pause and then say "well, I know this is not your fault but I really thought that you should let you boss know that this is not okay". Then all you have to say is "I completely understand where your frustration is coming from. Now let's see what I can do for you." And they are suddenly wery nice :D
I am a media consultant and I saw this interview and I was fascinated by Russells incredibly quick mind and how expertly he handled them without insulting them directly but correcting their bad over used and yet unaccountable rude and bad on air behaviour produced and pushed by bad producers.
Especially when we are talking Mika she wants got upset and said quiet part out loud... said it was "Their Job to Tell You What to Think" basically aaying we control the narrative, you will not challenge it! And also they will have control of the overton window. Study on who Mika's father was. I think they they had him on as a way to semi destroy him as you look at what he speaks of now, Truth
It goes to show that this type of media is a dying breed. They never translate well to the internet when they display this kind of behaviour. An old format that has not realised yet that the world has moved (or is moving) on.
It seemed to me that these abilities came naturally to Russell Brand. Maybe he's gotten better with time, but in a general sense, it doesn't seem like he needed to learn these skills. Wondering what you think?
This reminds me of watching Cesar Milan when he says ignore the dog until it calms down and then you can give it attention again lol. Never looked at diffusing situations by implementing a dog trainers tips lol but I’ll definitely try it
It absolutely works. Humans are not much more complex when you're looking at basic emotions and social behaviors. Simple classical conditioning works like a charm for bad behavior. Simply remove the reward (attention) when they act poorly. And when they rectify their behavior, bring the reward back. This works great in customer service _and_ with toxic parents 🙃 My mom and I have a relatively positive, healthy relationship now because I use this conditioning to maintain my boundaries. The only rule is you have to stay firm, clear and consistent.
On our first visit to my son’s orthodontist the secretary made one rude comment after the next to us. I finally said “ I’m so sorry, I feel like I have done something to upset you today” She looked up at me and said no, you haven’t upset me, I think she was shocked and embarrassed. Her attitude turned around, she was actually calling me hun when we left lol. I think kindness to someone being rude is most effective. If they continue to be rude at least you can walk away knowing you did the right thing.
Tips from the video: (TLDR) 1) dont leap into conversation to be cut off, make sure to FINISH your sentence even if people try to but in 2) Treat each member of group as an individual (use their names) and give eye contact 3) emphasize similarities with other members and give genuine compliments 4) calm stare in eye, dont pay attention to the person being mean and make it TENSE with stares and dont speak until they change to nice 5) call out behavior you appreciate and smile and engage with that behavior in enthusiastic ways 6) get rid of conversational tension ONLY when people change topic to nicer conversation 7) pay attention to nice members of a group and ignore rude ones 10) talk about behavior you dont like but dont call them out directly 11) Detach ego from personal attacks, and dont defend your ego or yourself MAKES YOU MORE CONFIDENT you are ENOUGH without opinions of others!
Thanks for the summary, Detaching ego; one of the most important things you can learn to do in your whole life. Reading the [Power of Now - Eckhart Tolle] and [Waking Up - Sam Harris] will go a long way to help you with this.
"You're a powerful woman, you've got a lovely job, what seems to be the trouble?" If you didn't catch it, right after Russel pays her this complement she smiles and pulls her hair behind her ear, clear sign that he hit the mark and his words had the desired effect.
I've been told my whole life that I look intimidating. But what they were referring to, is my habit of making people nervous by not responding when I think someone is lying, instead I just looking at them intently. I realized years ago that if I just stared and didn't speak, the person would get nervous and start chattering. That chatter is what I was looking for, and would help me ferret out the truth.
I cannot BELIEVE this interview. I’ve never seen such disrespect. Well done, Russell, as always, for using your wit and charm to be the better person. Love, love and more love ❤
@@cindymancini6153 I am currently reading Recovery, it is a wonderful resource if you are struggling with sobriety, makes me feel like I'm one of the cool kids.
I practice the "finish your sentence" when interrupted and people do usually take it more serious and hear me out. I switch to a deeper chest tone of voice to overpower their vocal bass so it's not shouting but rather increasing the vocal weight. The interrupter usually have poor communication skills or less respect or familiarity with you. Continue anyways because others are usually still interested and often also annoyed by the interruption.
I try to continue my sentence but sometimes it gets confusing to hear two sentences at once. I almost have to plug my ears to avoid losing track of what I'm saying. I'm obviously not going to do that, and I have a comparatively small voice so it doesn't usually help me to get louder. So I just switch my focus from external to internal and basically talk to myself until I finish. I guess it really is the best response to being interrupted, even if it doesn't mean keeping the talking stick.
9:08 "You shouldn't say 'he' when a person is present. You should refer to the person by their name. That's basic good manners." Holy moly! I remember seeing that part of the interview and realizing how they were indeed being rude. I didn't realize he's got mad social skills. Love it. Thanks for the video!
My Mum, who was very English (i was born in Australia) was very adament that this is very rude, callng somone He or She when they were present. She would say "SHE is the cat's mother" meaning you can use the word she or he when referring to an animal but not a human being when they are present
it seems surreal doesnt it? Who in their right mind thinks: "i know a great method for interviwing this person: i'll gang-up on him with 2 other ppl and insult him straight to his face" like wtf
He's the type of person that has the hardest time living in a clown's world. Logical, intelligent, compassionate and kind people have an invisible target on their back that most of their lives will not even realize it's there.
It was so compassionate of him to call his girlfriends grandfather (Andrew Sachs), an old man, telling him how he had slept with his grandaughter (Georgina Baillie)
This video jumped around a lot and was hard to follow at times (more of an editing and pacing thing), but I remember this morning show interview with Brand. How he basically takes over and points out their unskillfulness is truly a master class.
That second title is very vague, this is much more specific and subtle, and actually practical. I obviously know this is a joke but this is just for those who are gullible or dont think twice about what they read.
One of the most effective responses to an intrusive question is “Why do you ask”? It forces the rude person to stop and THINK about their question. Turn it back on them. Also, silence is golden. Let the silence hang, the person will inevitably open their mouth and blab on, because people hate silence. Also, interviews are horrid.
@@oneoflokis I can agree this can shift the focus and slow the advance. Still, I'll bite at this one - say the answer is "we're friends and I care about you and want to be involved in each other's life. I took an interest." How do you respond now?
Your channel is an autistic girl's dream! Thank you for teaching me things that other people seem to get so easily. People forget that sometimes people like me aren't born inherently socially aware and actually have to study these things to understand them at all. I struggle in social situations and your channel really helps. Thank you :-)
Dude, they don't get it easily. Sometimes they don't get it at all. People in general don't understand or contemplate why they avert their gaze at certain points in a conversation. This is rather high level stuff ^^
Silence in the face of inappropriate comments is probably the most effective response, and a good way to gain the upper hand. There's a great desire in all conversations to fill a gap of silence, so if someone is rude or insulting, and you don't respond verbally when it's "your turn," they will become very unsettled, and it draws attention to their gaffe. It's important to maintain eye contact and not give any facial clues, though. Simply looking them in the eye with a neutral expression will wilt them.
I'm an event photographer, and one of the moments I'm proudest of was when I was fixing up a guy's outfit before a group picture. As I was doing it, he yelled over to his friends, "See? I told you I could get her to touch me." They all laughed, but I acted like I didn't hear them (which was impossible, we were all in a fairly tiny room), so the dude who made the joke half-repeated it to cut through the awkwardness. I waited another beat and then said only loud enough for him to hear, "I heard you. I'm just not laughing." Then I made eye contact with him and told him to go stand with the other guys so I could take the picture. He wouldn't look at me for the rest of the event and did EVERYTHING I told him to, immediately.
@Boyer Ranch ooof... Sure do follow a lot of pretty women for someone who doesn't like them. Is that why your wife never shows up in any of your videos?
I've always instinctively had a very blank facial response when people would attacked me verbally. As I've been doing this more recently, with my sister, I've noticed that she tends to tell me the whole truth (and usually ends up talking herself in a circle, realizing holes in her own argument) when I just keep my mouth shut for a little bit. It seems to have the same effect as "practicing" what you're going to say to an inanimate object. The second she senses any sort of reaction in me, she changes her speech, and doesn't say what she wants to say, but rather, reactions to my reaction. Sometimes it feels impossible to have a civil conversation with her, so I've adapted to the fact that if I let her talk for long enough, she usually realizes that she's the one in the wrong, and I barely have to say a thing.
I actually can't remember a single case where I have avoided to say what I wanted to say as a result of someones reaction. Or when I think of it, my mom being mad at me as a child and not letting me speak, almost threatening me did that. But mostly, that seems like a very strange concept to me
This point totally went over my head during the video until I realized I'm someone with a very flat affect, a stereotypically stern, maybe mildly autistic man. When something is positive and enjoyable for me I have no issue expressing positivity, but the moment there's conflict, or boredom, or I don't like the way something is behaving, the neutral face and intonation set in. I have almost never been bullied socially, and I know recognize it's because I give bullies so little room to work.
Aaron Hydes That’s interesting because to me he just seems like either a pompous narcissist or a raging coke head. He does not appear masterful at anything in any way whatsoever - but that’s just me.
@@vondahe you don't know what a narcissist is if you think he is one. He is strong and won't let anyone take his power. You don't like him because you don't get him. He was very much different till he had a spiritual awakening. He hasn't taken drugs in over a decade. I'm a hippy and know if someone is in on drugs or not
@@eeeehuu2130 was a jerk. He is much different now. Go watch his RUclips stuff where he talks with people like Brian Cox and Derren brown. He is not the junkie jerk he appeared to be many years ago when married that pop singer
The court jester is usually the genius in the room. As in this case, Brant is a genius. He exposed these people in gentlemanly way and easily made it clear for the listener to see who was inferiors in the room.
That Morning Joe interview was shocking. I watched that ages ago and was so taken aback by how rude, disrespectful and unprofessional they were. Russell handled the situation brilliantly but they should be ashamed of themselves for how they conducted themselves.
The guy didnt align to their politics, they treated him not just like the enemy , but like enemy that is garbage. One would think TV stations and press should be impartial and only present the facts not the optics or politically correct narrative .
I love Russell's confidence. When you're smart enough and secure in who you are it's easy to deal with situations like these. Standup comedy is great for honing these skills. Most of us don't have enough experiences like these to get good at dealing with them.
This video just taught me so much about my own way of communicating. I have been coming up against people being extremely rude to me, and I am unable to verbally defend myself because I hate causing a stir or increasing confrontation. I knew I wasn't handling things well, so I went looking for an answer. I found it. It lies in letting them eat that uncomfortable silence they create. Not letting the awkwardness pass, but showing them - they created it - not me. I do need to defend myself, but in the proper way. Detaching myself from the comments they're making, and remembering who I am. Responding to each individual as their own entity, so I don't get swept away in me versus everyone dynamics. Thank you. God Bless you ♥
I’m the same way. And I also don’t like attention to myself. Usually I only responded when their aggression was not so subtle and I was very angry and then I would let loose. I know that’s not the solution. My nephew was very comical and could defuse rude people with his funny retorts that were rude back but hilarious and they would laugh. That’s a gift!
@@HayleysComet3 That is a gift! One I wish I had xD lol I have the same problem. When someone is super rude to me, I can't hold back. I start to tear up, and that makes me madder. Because my tears are from anger not sadness - but they always take it like they hurt my feelings.
@@staceycameron4157 I think age makes you wiser and better at dealing with people. But people will never cease to amaze at how rude or clueless they can be.
These tactics can also be used to bully people as well. I seen one girl at work who was a little socially awkward, and the one older lady completely ignored her, alienated her, and talked to everyone else but her. I used to try and chat with her to make her feel more included.
That's what should be done. I do the same, and I ignore the loud ones who try to exclude others. The problem is the loud ones will soon Complain and be loud and really cause a scene .. about what sweetie 😂 about being treated the way you treat others???
This interview with Brand was an excellent object lesson for me. I’m a barista at a coffee shop. We daily encounter some of the rudest and self entitled people. We can become very passive-aggressive and I find myself not looking at people while taking orders. It becomes too much and I oft feel emotionally beat up and mentally drained by the end of a five hour shift. Some customers…🙄
Totally true, it takes energy to engage somebody with eye contact and acknowledge their presence that way. If you don’t feel like engaging for those 2 seconds, it’s obvious that your energy is depleted in that moment. It’s the fast paced work environment. It’s unnatural to the psyche
I stopped going to a small coffee shop because one of the cashiers there was extremely rude to me. I’m never rude, and very soft spoken and shy, and when I got to the counter, she very coldly said “what do you want?” With a disgusted look. This doesn’t typically happen to me, so I was taken aback and blanked out on what I wanted to order. After a few seconds of silence, I just turned around and walked out. I felt bad and thought I had done something wrong for some reason. I haven’t gone back.
I absolutely agree with eye contact - making the person feel watched (there have been studies where they put stickers of eyes in public places and observed a raise in moral and pro-social behavior). Also the silence, making the person feel the urge to fill the gap, usually making themselves look worse, or trying to back pedal. The thing about calling a person by their name I think also has the effect of breaking through the barrier of them feeling safer by being a part of the group. I think it would make them feel less protected and more directly culpable. Not just them enjoying hearing their name.
I went from not getting him to genuine admiration. What a great compassionate way to absirb diffuse and dispatch negativity and direct attention to positive energy
It comes naturally to narcissistic sociopaths like him, plus he has the MK Ultra mind control programming taking care of all his interactions. Program charisma into a person? Yes, totally possible.
@@Nobody-hg1tk having a high EQ is the complete opposite of a sociopath you conspiracy paranoid dingus. Sociopaths and psychopaths are completely devoid of emotion and empathy/EQ. Russell is also eccentric and over the top and may come across as odd to basics like yourself but that's because individuals with ADHD tend to behave in that way. Your comment reeks of ignorance and paranoia
@@Risingofthephoenix that's why I watch videos like this: how to not become a sociopath when you have some EQ but people perceive me as the one totally lacking it. In this rigged society people boast about having things they lack the most.
This is what anyone who has been bullied should learn to do. I was, I'm 40 now and still struggle with confidence in such situations. I'm still easily bullied as an adult. I'm so glad I found this channel!
Prolonged silence is my favorite. I once had a (jerk) co-worker try to make me feel submissive by passive agressively asking, "now you're going to be a good little worker and close fast tonight for me, right?" Ha! He was not expecting the 'stare' nor the silence that followed that forced him time to reflect on his jerkiness. Finally, I answered calmly, "Yeah man." Like it was so funny because he was visibly flustered and ended up being like, "ye-yeah, haha, of course you will cuz you're like the best one here" Damn straight, son.
Ikr! 😆👏 I watched that part a few times, that subtle smile was great! I know how it is when you do this and people still just don't get it 😒😂🙄 I'm over here taking mad notes 😃🤣🤣
Sharper? Mate he literally swallowed the dictionary.....he is incredibly intelligent, witty and sarcastic without being rude. No one could challenge him and when anyone tries they fail miserably
Russel Brand is one of the most intelligent and interesting people on the planet. The quick witted and non shaken foundation that he stands firmly upon is only enhanced by his ability to speak the truth in a manner that leaves his opponent in a submissive state
Russell is especially gifted with language and wit. If I could never be at a loss for words like him, I'm sure I could stay calm in the face of uncomfortable social situations as well.
I must say-these videos are extremely helpful in navigating the weirdness of human behaviors and social interactions. I’m 52 with Asperger’s and have never been able to seamlessly “assimilate”-particularly in the workplace. However, these videos have given me a great toolbox of strategies to use in different situations. While the results haven’t been revolutionary or propelled my career, I have much more confidence and less internal criticism & anxiety
One time in high school we were in a group talking and one girl insulted me. At that age I normally would've insulted her back, but instead I just locked eyes with her and said, "Well that wasn't very nice. You wouldn't like it if I sat here and pointed out all your flaws, would you?" With that, I don't think she spoke for the next half hour.
*Be always firm with your stance, integrity and values.* - Hold an unshakeable posture/frame - Calm Cool Collected manner, never raise a voice showing emotions - Respectable logical arguments, if not being treated likewise, leave the premises
Ok i guess most people can hold a good posture, or at least fake it. But the other two points are highly dependent on the intelligence of the individual which is not really something you have a great deal of control over.
Showing emotion is actually okay. In fact not showing emotion at all is very unsettling and also unhealthy. The thing you should avoid is getting too worked up by something and being consumed and controlled by your emotions. Being able to remain calm and respectful even when being angry or hurt will show others that you are in control of the situation and have strong enough character to stay strong even when things aren't going your way. Showing that you're angry can even further showcase your strength as long as you don't get consumed by it and show people that you're no longer in control by throwing a tantrum.
Man I'm getting anxiety just thinking how smart, witty, vocabulary strong and confident he is......did i say that he is really hilarious, present, charismatic and charming.....damn the list doesn't end😂
When Russel Brand was on JRE, and he took the time to understand Joe’s views on hunting, I realized Russel gives everybody the opportunity to give their side of things. We need more people like him. We’d get along much more easily.
I saw his stand up comedy in NYC a couple of decades ago. Incredibly quick wit. Someone actually tried to heckle him and it didn't end well for that heckler. 🤣
@@arribaficationwineho32 I saw Jack Dee live and a few times people actually joined in and shouted their own comments out riffing on what he was saying. It wasn't like watching a show, it was like being in a pub with a mate.
What helped me dealing with rude and "Not letting you talk"-people was being nice and happy and never falling out of this role. I think it helps because keeping this consistent happieness shows them that their rude behavior doesnt have any effect on me so they stop trying.
I oftent interrupt if I want to respond to what a person has said, and I let someone interrupt if I see they want to respond. If I feel I didn't finish my thought, I just continue talking and usually the other person quiets down. I expect the same, but if I notice that the person never finishes what they say, I will either stop interrupting (or apologise and let them finish if I do it unintentionally) or explain that I expect them to continue talking if they really didn't finish the sentence. Personally I like being interrupted because it shows the other person is engaged in what I'm saying, but obviously it'd be annoying if it kept happening constantly because the other person only wants to hear themselves talk.
These advices won't work for you if you don't have the authority over people that are being rude to you, It only worked with Russel cause he was the guest and the rude people needed him for the content. These advices are for people already with authority that might be challenged by the lower-authority people, all these techniques did for Russel is he was able to NOT fuck up.
It’s interesting because, obviously not seeing everything in context, several things that were complimented were actually rude and manipulative. Russel’s compliment followed by him basically throwing a verbal punch at the guy for how he’s dressed, may have decreased some tension, but it also was a dig at the dude and likely meant to cut his confidence down a bit. Usually that is to manipulate someone into looking to you for approval. That’s just one example, but I really don’t think Russel is the one anyone should be looking at for behavior modeling.
Hey everyone, we have started a podcast that you can be a part of! If you have an interesting question for Ben and I, please go to ruclips.net/video/mK-ycFRvevc/видео.html and comment . In our next episode, we will respond to some of those questions and shout you out :-)
When will you break down Keanu Reeve already????
uh btw the title for this video is the same title for the joe rogan video so you may want to change it.
Is it intentional that you uploaded this video with the exact same title as the one that was about Joe Rogan? (Instead of calling it "How to Deal with Disrespect Without Being a Jerk", or "How to Command Respect Without Being A Jerk, Vol II")
You openly stated that you're being experimental with your thumbnail and video title, so I feel like this might be an intentional experiment.
Could you do a break down of Niall Horan. He is charming and effortlessly seems to make friends with everyone he meets.
A great fresh topic to cover could be the art of charisma through language barriers. I'm about to embark on my own journey for 2 years abroad, and can't imagine what it's like to authentically connect with people who you can't fully understand or communicate with. I've heard you touch on the subject of enthusiasm as it relates to this, but I think it would be valuable to hear you do a deep dive, given your experience living abroad.
Russell reminds me of a boyfriend I once had. He had an unbelievable ability to call people out on their crap and was able to make them feel REALLY uncomfortable about it. I loved watching him do this. He was always confident and kept his cool. This allowed him to think and say exactly what was needed to be said. He’s passed away now. I miss him every day.
Hey I’m rly sorry for your loss❤️ Can you share a favorite story of yours regarding one of these situations your bf finessed?
Sorry mate, some people leave an impression on our soul and we take them with us, just not in the way we wanted to. All the best.
He's lucky to be remembered so fondly.
The one who got away huh
Sorry for your loss, I'm sure the world was a better place for everyone with him in it
As a child I witnessed a man insult my friend's mother in front of a whole group of her friends. There was a very awkward silence while she just looked at him, then she smiled and said very loudly, 'how very unkind of you to say so', and then she just carried on talking to her friends. The man was totally humiliated and slunk away. Brilliant!
That's brilliant, I love that!
your friend' s mother , has class.
One can not buy , class .
Wow. That response was brilliant in every way. I hope I remember that & use it if I wind up in a similar situation.
I like her
lol
Xlnt recount. As a friend was becoming increasingly more abrasive with me, I suddenly stopped listening respectfully, looked her directly in both eyes, and said coldly " You can never talk this way to me again." It stunned her mid-sentence, she was silent, almost frozen for 8 to 10 seconds as I held eye contact, and she re-animated and said "You're right. I'm sorry, you didn't deserve that." Things have been on a more even keel since then, but we'll see. I don't need an apology nor any capitulation or "a win"...I simply want certain parameters of engagement to be followed when talking with friends. If I wanted a fight, I'd go to a bar, where it's acceptable for conversations to escalate quickly to shouting and insults. But not ever with friends or family. Proximity and emotional investment do not necessarily open the gates to intentional injury or agenda-based attacks. If we are in a relationship where we would normally be open and caring, it is not okay to use that proximity and closeness as a weapon or entree to deeper nerves and more painful attacks, which is exactly what happens in most self- consuming love/hate relationships. Taking advantage of that intimacy to hurt someone is against the rules, and simply, openly shows how immature that person's real feelings are toward the relationship. It is a hard lesson to learn and many relationships don't survive that growth process. Adults still have a need for internal growth, and need to learn the lessons of forgiveness, patience, and perspective with their families, friends, lovers, and even strangers. Simply not accepting bad behavior is a step toward a better relationship. But it can also be a step toward no relationship, too. Some people we just grow away from, or grow out of. Others we grow toward and often, we grow with each other. The garden analogy fits especially well when dealing with weeds and chronically destructive behavior. Encourage fruitful, healthy behavior and relationships, expect little or no returns from weeds and corrosive others. If we give respect, love, compassion, patience and positivity, and get none in return, it may be time for a "lesson"...but likely it's time to "lessen" our own burden and "listen" to our gut...move on. There are far better things to do than to try to change others' behavior and habitual negativity. Fix or forget...like an old car or classic stereo. It doesn't really matter how much you love it, it may be beyond fixing, and you may simply be in love with an image or an idea, rather than the reality. Keep the dream, toss the reality? I love old friends and old cars and hifis. Guess which ones are easier to maintain. Aye, there's the wicket! Cheers!
Wow, I didn't realize how good at speaking Russel is. So many subtleties.
I've noticed a lot of comedians are good at controlling a room. Most likely from their stand up performances and dealing with hecklers.
I've allowed my difference of opinion to color my views of him in the past. I also used to feel he was overly verbose, putting on airs so to speak, but thanks largely to this channels analysis have come to respect the man's skills.
@@oliviahafner561 too wordy? Eh, we often like least the things in others that we dislike most in ourselves.
@ I'm not sure that was an insult.
@@HigherPlanes I didn't think it was. I was overlaying my own views of him on myself. I saw it as humor. Joys of written communication.
Something I heard the other day that I loved, "Love me or hate me, both are in my favor. If you love me I'm in your heart, Hate me and I'm in your head."
The opposite of love is not hate, but indifference. Truer words have never been spoken 🙌🏼
Concern with being in someone's head because they hate you can only be a product of ego or malice, while also being affected by the same thing you're claiming
Ooooo
My father taught me as a young person, that silence and staying calm, is the best way to get to a person. Works like a charm. Way to go Dad!
I utilize that technique all the time, it's easier though when you don't care for conversing with most people in the first place, and being an introvert also helps a lot.
I'd have more respect for you than someone who forces us to listen to them finish a sentence.
What when those people finish their sentence with "am i right?" trying to push your response
@@projectfear22 tell them your honest opinion
so passive aggressive silent treatment then. divorced yet?
I wish I could be more like this, I'm too sensitive. And when someone says something that hurts me I don't know what to do and then hours later I think of what I could've said.
You don't, you are not, you do and then hours later it doesn't matter. Just be yourself and not the labels you have attached to yourself
@@mickharrison7262 thank you for your words :)
@@nadeshkaholmes9511 You are welcome. I haven't told you anything you didn't already know
I think the most important thing to do is to take yourself out of the equation, if that makes sense. Focus on the words, but don't associate them with yourself? You have to put distance between what someone says about you and how you perceive it.
Like they’ve said in the narrative several times, remove yourself from your ego...don’t take things personally.
Observe what is being said as if they were talking about someone else.
Russell Brand is VERY quick-witted and intelligent. It seems that people underestimate him and find out REALLY quick that he's no slouch.
He obviously has been around people a lot.
@@ganymeade5151 As has everyone else but his level of thinking separates him from the majority.
@You are correct But That statement would have the same affect if it was left unsaid.
@@neavo8421 ...and yours would be the same with affect or effect.
Russell Brand is the definition of a slouch... lol
The best advice I ever got from my grandfather and I followed it my whole life is that other people's opinions of you aren't any of your business, even if they tell you to your face.
That's a really good sentence to say back to an insult.. (Calmly)
Russel Brand is levels above them intelligence-wise and they just continued to treat him like a child, all the while he remains professional and mature. Respek
@@RUclipsChannel-dk5xv watch his RUclips channel. Specifically interviews on his podcast
How he's calling them out without being negative is truly impressive.
@@Neil-914 Listen to his podcast with Sam Harris to see how grossly inadequate and overrated Brand's intellect is..
@@RUclipsChannel-dk5xv you're entitled to think he isn't that intelligent, but his emotional awareness is undeniable.
@Sim I think you nailed it. Brand is brilliant in the way of social intelligence. The dude can read a room. I think what makes him brilliant is he takes the stance of a student. He wants to learn and asks far more questions than he does state an opinion.
I'm not a massive fan of his comedy, but I love watching interview clips of him because of his social navigation skills.
That's what pisses me off.
People speaking over me when I'm trying to finish a sentence, lol.
King Isaac
Blah, blah, blah, blah..
King Isaac you arnt loud enough
Coming from someone who named themselves king
I know right! Whenever I’m talking they-
@Salt Serpent yes?
1. Continue till the end of the sentence
2. Treat each member as an individual
- Call their names
- 3-second eye contact
- calm stare (neither malice nor smile)
- not pay attention (use body language)
- prolonged silence
3. Emphasize similarities
- Call out behavior that u appreciate. Return compliments
- be playful
- flat-out ignore the rude
- pay attention to who respects you. Be loud, engaging with them
- a “those type” call out
- Flat out call out bad behavior
4. Detach your ego from personal attacks
Just wondering. Why are you repeating the talking points in the video?
@@palomarjack Simply I write it down for fun ;)
@@palomarjack also, why do you ask me that question? I’m curious 😊😊
@@sophiedavidson1579 thank you for the quick synopsis. It's good to see it all written down and sometimes I'm not in a position where I can watch. I'm sure there are others who appreciate this text
@@MattCannady exactly, I'm glad op has written this out
“When dealing with people, let us remember we are not dealing with creatures of logic. We are dealing with creatures of emotion, creatures bristling with prejudices and motivated by pride and vanity.” -Dale Carnegie
I love that book
- Says the creature of emotion
Do you carry around a book of quotes as a defense mechanism?
@@Ester_Krupova A fanatic is someone who loses direction and doubles their speed
@@jsj31313jj I'm talking about how the quote talks about how people are creatures of emotion, full of prejudice, pride and vanity as if the one telling the quote isn't a person but a different superior species
Not having an ego totally frees you from other's opinions of you.
Having control of your ego. You already know we all have one.
Opinions of who? This logic is beyond comprehension
@@Litt13F00t
Really? It's pretty simple. Other's impressions and expressed thoughts about YOU. Their opinions. Surely you understand, you're a smart person.
@@2degucitas I was attempting a joke going with the idea that without an ego there's not really a "you" in the common sense of the word. Usually "you" or "I" refers to one's ego, so to say you don't have an ego seems like it would imply there is no "you" to be bound by other's opinions, nor is there a you to be freed from them. Its obviously an extreme (I'd say impossible) to say someone doesn't have an ego at all (even if its near entirely removed from the perspective they have of the world) and I think that's what makes this strangely complicated and almost impossible to talk about logically. It's possible there's just been some confusion/misinterpretation though
@@Litt13F00t
Ok thanks. Comments get misunderstood every day.
Russel Brand is a top notch conversationalist!
Guy is a charisma king. Don't know any better.
@@Sam-ng3of conan and ramsay
Conor Mcgregor is up there
Daniel Iles - Small Business totally agree
It's easy when you are a sociopath and have been programmed with MK Ultra for your role in the public ;)
I think the prolonged silences and staring at people in a serious manner is an amazing tactic.
It is actually a Narcissist tactic too.
We're taught to do it as teachers. We call it "the longest turn".
When a kid says something smart arsed while your back is turned writing on the board, stop, and do a 10 second turn and stare.
@@narcissus79 oh, I remember some teachers doing it in elementary. It shuts up annoying kids quickly.
As an ex teacher the death stare + silence is v effective 😁
Doesnt work with everyone and its not for everyone
Someone once told me “Swearing is a turn off” to which I replied “Good thing nobody was trying to turn you on ya pervert” and they nearly cried
All of them nearly cried?
@@McVaiothe 'they' in this case is singular
@LunarTheCat_0 Ok so he or she
@@McVaio but why go to the lengths to type 'he/she' when it's much easier to type 'they'?
@LunarTheCat_0 because they is plural, and "he" or "she" is not. Also, both "he" and "she" are a letter shorter.
I’ve always liked him but didn’t realize how much of a genius he is in social situations.
Agreed… Regardless what people say about him… love him
Ditto!!
He just straight up doesnt really care and says what he thinks
Charisma on Command: "Use less signals, and you will get less."
Stannis Barratheon: "Fewer."
The signals are called that because they are intended to trigger less or more of the behavior the other person is exhibiting. The amount of a behavior isn't countable, so less is correct in this context.
Only real OGs will get that reference...
Chris F A signal is a discrete thing. What you are describing is "signaling," in which case "less" would be correct.
OKAY. I WAS WATCHING THE VERY SAME STANNIS QUOTE SECONDS BEFORE I CLICKED THIS VIDEO.
It's not the amount of behaviour, it's the amount of signals. Signals ARE countable. A signal; one signal. The word 'signal' doesn't describe a descrete thing. Behaviour is more abstract. So I'm pretty sure 'fewer' is the most correct word in the context of 'signals'.
1. Finish your sentences. Don't stop midway.
2. Refer everyone by their name. Look at them for 3 seconds when speaking to someone
3. Emphasize similarities with others and complement them.
4. Use non verbal signal. Good signals (smiling at them, complementing them) encourage their behavior. Bad ones (not paying attention to them, giving them uncomfortable looks) tells them to stop something.
5. Call out bad behavior but don't point out the person specifically. Give them the chance to change the behavior.
6. Flat out criticize the behavior if the last one doesn't work. Criticize the behavior, not the person.
7. Detach your ego from personal attacks.
EXACTLY
I always do 1 when rude ppl cut me off, but in an Asian country, especially to the elders or in an hierarchical culture/ environment, it's seen as rude. But I'm an Asian and I don't care 😆
Thank you for outlining the bullet points of this video. As a person with brain injury, I don't absorb things as easily as I used to. Having multiple ways to sponge in knowledge is something that I appreciate. Great job!
Did anyone notice how far apart that woman's legs were when she was sitting on the interview couch?
@@slagparty yes! and right after that I wondered why men can sit comfortably and women have to be composed, or what would others think
That whole interview with Russell is a lecture on how to effectively handle a hostile conversation. Definitely one of the best things I have ever seen. Russell is so good at that, it’s unbelievable.
His tactics really only work in a situation where the power dynamic is somewhat balanced, where the person has some level of respect for you or is expected to behave in a reasonably respectful manner.
He has a quick wit, great vocabulary and is sensitive enough to speak without being overbearing.
@@BebeDaullPeople are adaptable. I've seen him on more hostile instances like when he went on Fox, he still handled it well. Never just stay static on one strategy or set of strategies based on specific context, adapt.
He's so used to hostile conversations that he takes offense to silence.
@dualexistence
He's very adept @ the
art of conversation and distraction.
Mad respect for Russell with his emotional intelligence and social skills.
Barf. He's a blowhole.
Wow. I didn’t realize that.
Agreed ❤️
Simply on another level... most people don't have the minerals to handle a 3 to 1 barrage live on TV. Kudos to Russell. Top man, very underated.
@@andybarry5315 Peter Hitchens had Russell a bit lost for words on that Newsnight debate. And Hitchens was outnumbered about three to one there.
I love that three hosts are trying to be cheeky, literally being rude to their guest, think themselves are hilarious- and Russel keeps it so cool. AND now his appearance and their awful behavior is now a teaching video(s) on the internet about how to deal with bullies. Lol
Everything serves a purpose, even as a bad example. They served that purpose perfectly!! 😜
May all you wishes come true. God bless 💫🙏🙏
The Clips are so short I'm having a hard time figuring out what is really going on in that dialogue
@@doumkatekzit's available to watch in its entirety on RUclips if you search for it. I had already seen it before happening on this video
At one point Russell points out how Mika is holding a bottle of water while she was confronting him. I have to say it was kind of sexy and she was blushing.
Detaching from your ego, is the single most important thing you can do to boost your charisma. Most of the behaviors you wish to develop - or get rid of - will naturally be fixed when you aren't concerned with protecting your ego. That's how you become truly authentic.
Truth. Alan Watts said that when the ego is about to be revealed it automatically identifies with your higher self. In other words detaching from the ego, allows you to be your authentic self. All that detachment is, is realizing that the things people may judge or criticize you for, do not define you. Simply not responding to or defending yourself from personal attacks is a way to accomplish this, as Russell does so expertly here.
Cameron you can
I have no concept of ego. Maybe thats why.
Authentic in the eyes of the beholder. Your ego is part of you, thus to be truly authentic, it has to be shown. If not, it might be more pleasing to others but it is far from authentic.
This is so useful. As a child I was overrun in every conversation by a narcissistic parent, I never learned this skill and consequently it happens to me in adulthood sometimes and it’s so frustrating and embarrassing. Planning to employ these strategies tout-de-suite.
Same all the way around
Good luck man! I also have narcicistic parents, only that I don't have this issue because they enjoyed the fights. Hope all goes well
I understand that to well 🫠
That happened to my husband, but my narcissistic mother had the opposite effect on me: I cut into and interrupt others so fluidly it just feels like natural conversation. I really thought that's just how I talked to people until I moved out and then visited my mom and sister and realized we don't converse normally at all. It's been a huge point of contention in our relationship.
@@nothere3982surely u must know brands narcissistic behaviour. Omg I can’t believe u ppl can’t see this is his payback
these hosts were so rude to Russell smh great breakdown!
i love the part where russell looks at him like "oh look at you, you poor little sauasage, asking which i prefer: films standup or TV... asking your little journalist school day one question, arent you adorable thinking you have value and input" fricking hilarious.
I disagree
Typical of snobbish New Yorkers. One of the worst in the country.
It’s because while a lot of people respect Russel he has a very unpopular image that hosts pick up on whether to attract viewers or make the show more enjoyable. I like the guy
Americans being americans
"Did you see how Russell did everything I mentioned?"
Pretty easy to do, as long as you mention everything Russell did. 🤣🤣
Lol i was thinking that for a second all this guy does is highlight the things that happen in a clip but i guess it's good advice.
i thought the exact same thing hahahahah
Thank you Captain obvious
@@fisherg.6204 U sir, r a troll
@@jamesroberts325 thank you for the compliment
It is better to remain silent, and be thought of as a fool, than it is to open your mouth, and remove all doubt. So true.
Yeah, I know. I open my mouth way too much!
@@sunriseboy4837 The trick isn't to keep your mouth shut all of the time. The trick is, to know when you should open it. 😜
I too am an advocate of walk silently and use a very big stick!
or however that saying is supposed to go. Nothing malicious. I swear... Teehee.
@@somethingtrulyhorrifying Like you, I am silently content with the size of my stick. 😜
I’m a cashier at an estate sale company. So weekly i deal with tons of people who want to pay little to nothing for whatever they have in mind and usually try to talk down to you. I’m glad seeing this video and showed me I actually learned a lot of these practices on my own, such as ignoring rude people and not letting them interrupt my speech. I see others in similar situations say they find themselves checking out emotionally but I do the exact opposite when faced with aggression/ malice I try to to pretend they didn’t say anything but simple facts. Such as when people ask the price of an item and I tell them “$5” they love to respond with something like “$5? I can buy them brand new for that much!” To which I reply we’ll that one is $5. Rather than ignoring them I acknowledge what they said without giving them a single inch toward their statement. I’ve had several people stand next to my register repeatedly asking “why not $3?” And I just ignore them. If I reply it’s “$5” and nothing else. Don’t let people build imaginary power over you! Know your worth
Thank you for sharing. Great tips 👌 👍 👏
Great! You're doing awesomely! And you will only get stronger and better! Cheers!
"Don't let people build imaginary power over you." ✨️ 💪 💯 What you said there is my ultimate, all-time favorite new quote.
I do this as well. If it's above my pay grade, then I send it to the higher-ups.
But damn dealing with people is too much. I'm not at a job where I don't interact as much. I have to take a break for about 10 years, I think😁
Respect!
Not a Brand fan at all. However those three "interviewers" annoyed me. They were classic bullies, ganging up on someone they thought was an easy mark, bitching about him like he wasn't there. I'm very impressed with his response.
Why not a rb fan? Just curious
@@natedog69420 Fair question. At the beginning I didn't find him entertaining, funny or likeable. There was a lot of hype around him and I tend to dislike that too. I didn't actively dislike HIM, however, until the puerile "humour" with Andrew Sachs.
I am warming to the guy now though. It seems a few years and experiences has knocked lots of rough edges off him. He seems a considered, thoughtful man.
@@rooramblingon895 interesting. I felt the same way about him i think back when i was a teenager and he first popped up. Been listening to him past year or 2 here and there though, more lately. I think hes friggin smart
@@natedog69420 I agree. Also pretty balanced and a lot more humble than he used to be.
He did well under the circumstances - but talk about a low quality interview/exchange.
Russell Brand has higher status than all of the interviewers added together. He remains strong and centered even when he is being treated rudely. Russell never shows fear or anxiety. He floats like a butterfly, stings like a bee.
And calls up old men with Johnathan Ross and humiliated him, which ended with him eventually dying. With them scum bringing him down for their own entertainment 😡
I agree whole heartedly. He is brilliant and WELL-MANNERED.🎉
You don't want to insult someone like Russell brand he is really quick witted and funny .
is that how he gets so laughably delusional too?
Unfortunately i think the victims of his wit often don’t quite get how much he roasts them and think the opposite has happened. His wit goes past a lot of people who are too caught up in their jealousy and who are trying to bring him down a notch. He is incredibly confident and says what he thinks is true with no apology. This annoys people who feel they can’t say what they want and they become nasty. Sad really.
@rayfighter Seems as though someone's a little touchy about other people having different views than them. Don't take it personally, bro. Not so long ago, people could even be friends whilst holding different views. In this regard, feel free to ask yourself if you're actually the delusional one. Truth hurts but best face it head on. Good luck, brother.
@@rayfighterahhh your jealousy is showing 😂
cope harder guys 😂
Whole new respect for Russel Brand here. It's funny how they "forgot" his name when HE is the only one I've heard of before. Kudos to Brand.
Kat got him mixed up with Willy Brandt, the Chancellor of West Germany in the 60s and 70s. It sounds like the MSNBC people are older than you, and being in the news business, they're likely more familiar with Willy than Russell.
Thanks, I was so confused about that part 😶🤣
@@lisagd22 I'm old enough to remember the 60s and 70s but mistaking Russell Brand for Willy Brand is ridiculous.
@@Brendawallingbear I agree; they should know better.
It is so UNPROFESSIONAL on their part I can hardly believe it was done spontaneously.
I've actually started to work as a telephone switchboard operator one week ago, and I can testify that the "just stay quiet" mood when tension is building up until the other person feels like she ou he has to say something nice works quite well lmao. I've had people complaining for two minutes straight until they realise that I'm not responding to any of what they are saying, so they pause and then say "well, I know this is not your fault but I really thought that you should let you boss know that this is not okay". Then all you have to say is "I completely understand where your frustration is coming from. Now let's see what I can do for you." And they are suddenly wery nice :D
Yep classic call centre angry customer control , let them run out of screams and anger and then leave it quiet until they apologise then fix the issue
Switchboard operator? The real question is how you're accessing RUclips from the 1940's?!?
You sound like a weirdo
What of in group convos? do you ignore that one person?
I am a media consultant and I saw this interview and I was fascinated by Russells incredibly quick mind and how expertly he handled them without insulting them directly but correcting their bad over used and yet unaccountable rude and bad on air behaviour produced and pushed by bad producers.
Especially when we are talking Mika she wants got upset and said quiet part out loud... said it was "Their Job to Tell You What to Think" basically aaying we control the narrative, you will not challenge it! And also they will have control of the overton window. Study on who Mika's father was. I think they they had him on as a way to semi destroy him as you look at what he speaks of now, Truth
It goes to show that this type of media is a dying breed. They never translate well to the internet when they display this kind of behaviour. An old format that has not realised yet that the world has moved (or is moving) on.
It seemed to me that these abilities came naturally to Russell Brand. Maybe he's gotten better with time, but in a general sense, it doesn't seem like he needed to learn these skills. Wondering what you think?
Don’t comedians deal with hecklers regularly? They probably need to handle them effectively to get the audience on their side and have a good show.
Media consultant?? That’s 3 sentences in one & not even a coma !!
This reminds me of watching Cesar Milan when he says ignore the dog until it calms down and then you can give it attention again lol. Never looked at diffusing situations by implementing a dog trainers tips lol but I’ll definitely try it
It makes sense since most of Cesar Milan's practice is human management; training the owners not to fuel bad behavior in their dogs
I'm my experience, if you can train horses and/or dogs, you can train people.
Especially children, since they process much more off natural instincts.
It absolutely works. Humans are not much more complex when you're looking at basic emotions and social behaviors. Simple classical conditioning works like a charm for bad behavior. Simply remove the reward (attention) when they act poorly. And when they rectify their behavior, bring the reward back. This works great in customer service _and_ with toxic parents 🙃 My mom and I have a relatively positive, healthy relationship now because I use this conditioning to maintain my boundaries. The only rule is you have to stay firm, clear and consistent.
Russell openly admits that he constantly works on his ego & anger issues. He's a work in progress & I really appreciate his transparency.
On our first visit to my son’s orthodontist the secretary made one rude comment after the next to us. I finally said “ I’m so sorry, I feel like I have done something to upset you today” She looked up at me and said no, you haven’t upset me, I think she was shocked and embarrassed. Her attitude turned around, she was actually calling me hun when we left lol. I think kindness to someone being rude is most effective. If they continue to be rude at least you can walk away knowing you did the right thing.
I've done almost the same thing. I changed the word "you" to "your secretary", then presented the question directly to my doctor.
Personally, I don't think calling someone "hun" is very respectful.
@@dianeyoung8068 I really hate the word hun - so condescending.
@@dianeyoung8068 Agree. But here it represented a big shift in this woman's behavior.
Tell them " its nice to be important but more important to be nice" usually clamps them up.
Tips from the video: (TLDR)
1) dont leap into conversation to be cut off, make sure to FINISH your sentence even if people try to but in
2) Treat each member of group as an individual (use their names) and give eye contact
3) emphasize similarities with other members and give genuine compliments
4) calm stare in eye, dont pay attention to the person being mean and make it TENSE with stares and dont speak until they change to nice
5) call out behavior you appreciate and smile and engage with that behavior in enthusiastic ways
6) get rid of conversational tension ONLY when people change topic to nicer conversation
7) pay attention to nice members of a group and ignore rude ones
10) talk about behavior you dont like but dont call them out directly
11) Detach ego from personal attacks, and dont defend your ego or yourself MAKES YOU MORE CONFIDENT you are ENOUGH without opinions of others!
Thank you!
I took a photo of this as a reminder on the go.
1,2, and 11 are enough for a good start
Thank youu!
Thanks for the summary, Detaching ego; one of the most important things you can learn to do in your whole life. Reading the [Power of Now - Eckhart Tolle] and [Waking Up - Sam Harris] will go a long way to help you with this.
Russel has an incredibly effective communication skill!
I have no idea who Russel was prior to watching this but he’s communicating at a point everybody should strive to
"...He wastes no mental energy defending himself..." true, and so hard to do. He's brilliant & a truly authentic human!
so are you , virtual friend
"You're a powerful woman, you've got a lovely job, what seems to be the trouble?"
If you didn't catch it, right after Russel pays her this complement she smiles and pulls her hair behind her ear, clear sign that he hit the mark and his words had the desired effect.
Definitely noticed that, and got a chuckle from it. Good eye. 👌🏻👌🏻
Secretly wishing she could make out with him.
Appealing to her...vanity.
@@ShalomEntirety1 that's the only way.
@@ShalomEntirety1 That was his way of bamboozling her. So flustered she couldn't think properly. He's brilliant!
I've been told my whole life that I look intimidating. But what they were referring to, is my habit of making people nervous by not responding when I think someone is lying, instead I just looking at them intently. I realized years ago that if I just stared and didn't speak, the person would get nervous and start chattering. That chatter is what I was looking for, and would help me ferret out the truth.
You’d be a good interrogator
That's pretty cool. I need to put that in my toolbox. I think I've tried it before but it won't work on those who don't already respect you.
You have a horrifically high opinion of yourself.
@@pnpgutterfoldit's easier with being comfortable with silence. Not every second of the day has to be filled with talk between people
It's crazy how obvious it is when people lie and they literally will do it to your face like you dont know. XD
I cannot BELIEVE this interview. I’ve never seen such disrespect. Well done, Russell, as always, for using your wit and charm to be the better person. Love, love and more love ❤
He's a nonce
Too bad Russell Brand couldn't be more controlled about "signals" to women OFF camera.
@@gaiagoddess8009 So should this video be taken down, then? Are all the lesson irrelevant?
You've never seen the media interview a conservative? This is typical.
@@AMERICANPATRIOT123expecting the truth isn’t disrespectful
I have recently discovered how unbelievably gifted this man is. People do not take him serious enough, he is smart!
I’ve been wanting to read one of his books for a long time now. I’m curious if you have, and if you recommend it?
His you tube is filled with fantastic interviews. Good stuff ✝️❤️🇺🇸
@@cindymancini6153 I just finished Me tors and Recovery and I highly recommend both!!
@@cindymancini6153 I am currently reading Recovery, it is a wonderful resource if you are struggling with sobriety, makes me feel like I'm one of the cool kids.
Beautiful...beautiful man.
I practice the "finish your sentence" when interrupted and people do usually take it more serious and hear me out. I switch to a deeper chest tone of voice to overpower their vocal bass so it's not shouting but rather increasing the vocal weight. The interrupter usually have poor communication skills or less respect or familiarity with you. Continue anyways because others are usually still interested and often also annoyed by the interruption.
Johan Abrams pijjjii
Never underestimate the power of ignoring your nemesi
I try to continue my sentence but sometimes it gets confusing to hear two sentences at once. I almost have to plug my ears to avoid losing track of what I'm saying. I'm obviously not going to do that, and I have a comparatively small voice so it doesn't usually help me to get louder. So I just switch my focus from external to internal and basically talk to myself until I finish. I guess it really is the best response to being interrupted, even if it doesn't mean keeping the talking stick.
The tip with switching to a deeper chest voice instead of just "speaking louder" is so great, thank you!
Lol
9:08 "You shouldn't say 'he' when a person is present. You should refer to the person by their name. That's basic good manners." Holy moly! I remember seeing that part of the interview and realizing how they were indeed being rude. I didn't realize he's got mad social skills. Love it. Thanks for the video!
My Mum, who was very English (i was born in Australia) was very adament that this is very rude, callng somone He or She when they were present. She would say "SHE is the cat's mother" meaning you can use the word she or he when referring to an animal but not a human being when they are present
MSNBC recruits and pays people to be rude and disingenuous. It is AWFUL...
I have always been fascinated by how effectively Mr. Brand communicates. It was amazing to see the particulars broken down.
Wtf was going on in that msnbc interview? Did they just invite him on to bully him? He is the GUEST. How blatantly unprofessional.
it seems surreal doesnt it? Who in their right mind thinks: "i know a great method for interviwing this person: i'll gang-up on him with 2 other ppl and insult him straight to his face" like wtf
Little Miss Dysthymia yes ma'am, exactly. New subscriber!!
I sincerely hope they got fired for that debacle.
@@vashsunglassesPure Toxic.
@@vashsunglassesWell said
I love that Russell called them out. They were being so rude to him as a guest on their show. Who raised them?
Liberals.
@@D_Marrenalv Russell is a liberal
amazing how you can call someone out by not even saying anything and just staring at them in silence l_el_
It was MSNBC ….say no more
@@McSnezzly those show hose probably the political correctness type of liberal and i don't think Russell is like that
Russell is highly intelligent and a kind, compassionate person. I wish we had more people like him on the planet.
Yeah too bad he cheated on his wife
😂
He's the type of person that has the hardest time living in a clown's world. Logical, intelligent, compassionate and kind people have an invisible target on their back that most of their lives will not even realize it's there.
It was so compassionate of him to call his girlfriends grandfather (Andrew Sachs), an old man, telling him how he had slept with his grandaughter (Georgina Baillie)
@@freezedriedzombi8242 Which only proves that he’s a fallible human, just like everyone else.
This video jumped around a lot and was hard to follow at times (more of an editing and pacing thing), but I remember this morning show interview with Brand. How he basically takes over and points out their unskillfulness is truly a master class.
"Why do I watch these videos as if I'm some kind of alien trying to assimilate into human culture?"
Nanoo, Nanoo
@Jhon Krasnovskiy pretty sure I was born on Earth but ok bud.
So Zuckerberg doesn't feel alone
I agree...clicks back arrow.
Haha
damn he reallly defended himself from 3 other people ganging up on him
*1950s*“In the future we’ll have flying cars” *2019* “HOW TO INTERACT IN REAL LIFE WITH REAL PEOPLE”
Reality is stranger than fiction
StupidityKiller - well you’re not wrong 😂
XD so true.
@@Hgulix62nice quote.
That second title is very vague, this is much more specific and subtle, and actually practical. I obviously know this is a joke but this is just for those who are gullible or dont think twice about what they read.
I am really amazed at how well Brand handles these low-IQ groups ganging up on him, and also how masterfully well you explain what he does.
Well, they're always liberals. Intellectually humiliating them in easy.
Russell nudes to learn how to relaxe his throat muscles because he choked last time we met.
Yes, he is a master manipulator.
@@derekpierkowski7641Painfully unfunny
@derekpierkowski7641 ...you need to spell before you comment ...😂
This channel should be called “how to human”
@WORK PLAYLISTS haha, shut up.
@WORK PLAYLISTS Internet is the bible on steroids. You sir are totally wrong. We are better humans then ever before.
How to be likable human
@@BlaDeKke not quite like a Bible, but definitely a great tool to better ourselves.
@WORK PLAYLISTS I see what you did there. The internet is a *net* negative. Good joke.
One of the most effective responses to an intrusive question is “Why do you ask”? It forces the rude person to stop and THINK about their question. Turn it back on them. Also, silence is golden. Let the silence hang, the person will inevitably open their mouth and blab on, because people hate silence. Also, interviews are horrid.
👍
Not true. Easily rebutted with "because I want to know / I'm curious" which is the obvious answer and requires 0 self reflection
@@Wes-Tyler WHY do you want to know?
@@oneoflokis 💯
@@oneoflokis I can agree this can shift the focus and slow the advance. Still, I'll bite at this one - say the answer is "we're friends and I care about you and want to be involved in each other's life. I took an interest." How do you respond now?
Your channel is an autistic girl's dream! Thank you for teaching me things that other people seem to get so easily. People forget that sometimes people like me aren't born inherently socially aware and actually have to study these things to understand them at all. I struggle in social situations and your channel really helps. Thank you :-)
Isn't it grand! I understand completely. Good call.
Ikr autistic girl (or at least that`s how others perceive me) who loves this channel for eons
Dude, they don't get it easily. Sometimes they don't get it at all. People in general don't understand or contemplate why they avert their gaze at certain points in a conversation. This is rather high level stuff ^^
i think the most people have a struggle with this :)You are not alone .
90% of people don't get this. It's too much for anyone to grasp completely. He's selling you something. Remember that.
If you haven’t seen it, you’ve got to watch the full interview, Russel is handles it amazingly.
I love the way that Russell uses humor. It's done in a kind way, rather than mean and sarcastic. He's is naturally charismatic.
He also indicates directly who he’s talking to as he speaks. Such a power move. Like a professor calling on a student
Silence in the face of inappropriate comments is probably the most effective response, and a good way to gain the upper hand. There's a great desire in all conversations to fill a gap of silence, so if someone is rude or insulting, and you don't respond verbally when it's "your turn," they will become very unsettled, and it draws attention to their gaffe. It's important to maintain eye contact and not give any facial clues, though. Simply looking them in the eye with a neutral expression will wilt them.
Hence the saying, "Apathy, not hate, is the opposite of love."
I'm an event photographer, and one of the moments I'm proudest of was when I was fixing up a guy's outfit before a group picture. As I was doing it, he yelled over to his friends, "See? I told you I could get her to touch me." They all laughed, but I acted like I didn't hear them (which was impossible, we were all in a fairly tiny room), so the dude who made the joke half-repeated it to cut through the awkwardness. I waited another beat and then said only loud enough for him to hear, "I heard you. I'm just not laughing." Then I made eye contact with him and told him to go stand with the other guys so I could take the picture. He wouldn't look at me for the rest of the event and did EVERYTHING I told him to, immediately.
Handled it like a boss
Savage!! Love that, great tip!
Maybe learn to take a harmless joke...
@@MeadeJ67 Not harmless and she was working. It's inappropriate.
@Boyer Ranch ooof... Sure do follow a lot of pretty women for someone who doesn't like them. Is that why your wife never shows up in any of your videos?
I've always instinctively had a very blank facial response when people would attacked me verbally. As I've been doing this more recently, with my sister, I've noticed that she tends to tell me the whole truth (and usually ends up talking herself in a circle, realizing holes in her own argument) when I just keep my mouth shut for a little bit. It seems to have the same effect as "practicing" what you're going to say to an inanimate object. The second she senses any sort of reaction in me, she changes her speech, and doesn't say what she wants to say, but rather, reactions to my reaction. Sometimes it feels impossible to have a civil conversation with her, so I've adapted to the fact that if I let her talk for long enough, she usually realizes that she's the one in the wrong, and I barely have to say a thing.
I actually can't remember a single case where I have avoided to say what I wanted to say as a result of someones reaction. Or when I think of it, my mom being mad at me as a child and not letting me speak, almost threatening me did that. But mostly, that seems like a very strange concept to me
This point totally went over my head during the video until I realized I'm someone with a very flat affect, a stereotypically stern, maybe mildly autistic man. When something is positive and enjoyable for me I have no issue expressing positivity, but the moment there's conflict, or boredom, or I don't like the way something is behaving, the neutral face and intonation set in. I have almost never been bullied socially, and I know recognize it's because I give bullies so little room to work.
I'm not a fan of Russell Brand, don't find him particularly funny. However, I must admit he can control a situation masterfully
HOW IN THE WORLD AREN"T YOU A FAN HE"S THE MOST AMUSING HUMAN BEING ON EARTH
Aaron Hydes That’s interesting because to me he just seems like either a pompous narcissist or a raging coke head. He does not appear masterful at anything in any way whatsoever - but that’s just me.
vondahe He kind of seems like a jerk, but he gets what he wants in that conversations
@@vondahe you don't know what a narcissist is if you think he is one. He is strong and won't let anyone take his power. You don't like him because you don't get him. He was very much different till he had a spiritual awakening. He hasn't taken drugs in over a decade. I'm a hippy and know if someone is in on drugs or not
@@eeeehuu2130 was a jerk. He is much different now. Go watch his RUclips stuff where he talks with people like Brian Cox and Derren brown. He is not the junkie jerk he appeared to be many years ago when married that pop singer
The court jester is usually the genius in the room. As in this case, Brant is a genius. He exposed these people in gentlemanly way and easily made it clear for the listener to see who was inferiors in the room.
Are you talking about Willie Brant?
The Fool in "King Lear" is the most attuned to the unfolding machinations.
Just like JP Sears 🙌🏻
@@johnbarry1965 - Russell Brand is nobody's fool.
@@maryhalverson5713 The essence and dynamism of the "Fool" is that on the surface he is inane but speaks totally with clarity.
That Morning Joe interview was shocking. I watched that ages ago and was so taken aback by how rude, disrespectful and unprofessional they were. Russell handled the situation brilliantly but they should be ashamed of themselves for how they conducted themselves.
They're trying to "outcool" him, which can't be done.
...I believe it is because Russell Brand does not fit certain agenda's...
The guy didnt align to their politics, they treated him not just like the enemy , but like enemy that is garbage. One would think TV stations and press should be impartial and only present the facts not the optics or politically correct narrative .
That is how they treat anyone with whom they disagree. Nothing new.
@@3Angela Aye
I love Russell's confidence. When you're smart enough and secure in who you are it's easy to deal with situations like these. Standup comedy is great for honing these skills. Most of us don't have enough experiences like these to get good at dealing with them.
I watched this interview live, and was stunned. Watching it unfold, with no expectation of what he was going to do, was wonderful. He was brilliant
he even had mika going....fan please.....lol....kid in a candy store
All very interesting but as a fellow Brit I have to be honest, Russel Brand is a twat and always has been
Me too ..I was like wow they didn't know who they were messing with
*_Act in a way that shows you respect yourself and others will respect you_*
This video just taught me so much about my own way of communicating. I have been coming up against people being extremely rude to me, and I am unable to verbally defend myself because I hate causing a stir or increasing confrontation. I knew I wasn't handling things well, so I went looking for an answer. I found it. It lies in letting them eat that uncomfortable silence they create. Not letting the awkwardness pass, but showing them - they created it - not me. I do need to defend myself, but in the proper way. Detaching myself from the comments they're making, and remembering who I am. Responding to each individual as their own entity, so I don't get swept away in me versus everyone dynamics. Thank you. God Bless you ♥
Very well said. Thank you.
I’m the same way. And I also don’t like attention to myself. Usually I only responded when their aggression was not so subtle and I was very angry and then I would let loose. I know that’s not the solution. My nephew was very comical and could defuse rude people with his funny retorts that were rude back but hilarious and they would laugh. That’s a gift!
@@HayleysComet3 That is a gift! One I wish I had xD lol I have the same problem. When someone is super rude to me, I can't hold back. I start to tear up, and that makes me madder. Because my tears are from anger not sadness - but they always take it like they hurt my feelings.
@@staceycameron4157 I think age makes you wiser and better at dealing with people. But people will never cease to amaze at how rude or clueless they can be.
What you say somehow makes sense and doesn't make sense at the same time, care to elaborate?
His stand up, in the moment, quick thinking helps to remain calm.
Russell is so intelligent. I just realized how much i adore him
pinkrainbowtree watch his RUclips channel. Better than your average American news.
The competitive turkeys around him are intimidated or just don't like him; and act to put him in his place.
These tactics can also be used to bully people as well. I seen one girl at work who was a little socially awkward, and the one older lady completely ignored her, alienated her, and talked to everyone else but her. I used to try and chat with her to make her feel more included.
That's what should be done. I do the same, and I ignore the loud ones who try to exclude others. The problem is the loud ones will soon Complain and be loud and really cause a scene .. about what sweetie 😂 about being treated the way you treat others???
Youre an empath.. 🙌
@ray h. So you are saying they are the John Wick of hurting peoples feelings?
@@TheJeremyKentBGross *hurting
Thank you for standing up for the quiet girl
This interview with Brand was an excellent object lesson for me. I’m a barista at a coffee shop. We daily encounter some of the rudest and self entitled people. We can become very passive-aggressive and I find myself not looking at people while taking orders. It becomes too much and I oft feel emotionally beat up and mentally drained by the end of a five hour shift. Some customers…🙄
I work as a cashier, i feel you!
Totally true, it takes energy to engage somebody with eye contact and acknowledge their presence that way. If you don’t feel like engaging for those 2 seconds, it’s obvious that your energy is depleted in that moment. It’s the fast paced work environment. It’s unnatural to the psyche
I’m so sorry you have to deal with that. I used to barista as well and some people treat you like you’re worthless. You’re not - they are.
I stopped going to a small coffee shop because one of the cashiers there was extremely rude to me. I’m never rude, and very soft spoken and shy, and when I got to the counter, she very coldly said “what do you want?” With a disgusted look. This doesn’t typically happen to me, so I was taken aback and blanked out on what I wanted to order. After a few seconds of silence, I just turned around and walked out. I felt bad and thought I had done something wrong for some reason. I haven’t gone back.
@@ascendednightingale2456 actually I think you handled it quite well. Without a word you let the other person know that her behavior was unacceptable.
I absolutely agree with eye contact - making the person feel watched (there have been studies where they put stickers of eyes in public places and observed a raise in moral and pro-social behavior). Also the silence, making the person feel the urge to fill the gap, usually making themselves look worse, or trying to back pedal.
The thing about calling a person by their name I think also has the effect of breaking through the barrier of them feeling safer by being a part of the group. I think it would make them feel less protected and more directly culpable. Not just them enjoying hearing their name.
I went from not getting him to genuine admiration. What a great compassionate way to absirb diffuse and dispatch negativity and direct attention to positive energy
I had no idea Brand was actually that much of a social and emotional genius.
It comes naturally to narcissistic sociopaths like him, plus he has the MK Ultra mind control programming taking care of all his interactions. Program charisma into a person? Yes, totally possible.
@@Nobody-hg1tk having a high EQ is the complete opposite of a sociopath you conspiracy paranoid dingus. Sociopaths and psychopaths are completely devoid of emotion and empathy/EQ. Russell is also eccentric and over the top and may come across as odd to basics like yourself but that's because individuals with ADHD tend to behave in that way. Your comment reeks of ignorance and paranoia
@Nobody Mk Ultra is not practiced in the Uk, let alone nowadays.
Yes so true. This is why he left Katy Perry. He couldn’t handle how dim she was and only into the materialistic lifestyle.
@@Risingofthephoenix that's why I watch videos like this: how to not become a sociopath when you have some EQ but people perceive me as the one totally lacking it. In this rigged society people boast about having things they lack the most.
As someone with social anxiety I love watching this breakdown. Russell Brand is a boss!!!
It made my heart race, quite honestly
This is what anyone who has been bullied should learn to do. I was, I'm 40 now and still struggle with confidence in such situations. I'm still easily bullied as an adult. I'm so glad I found this channel!
Prolonged silence is my favorite. I once had a (jerk) co-worker try to make me feel submissive by passive agressively asking, "now you're going to be a good little worker and close fast tonight for me, right?"
Ha! He was not expecting the 'stare' nor the silence that followed that forced him time to reflect on his jerkiness. Finally, I answered calmly, "Yeah man."
Like it was so funny because he was visibly flustered and ended up being like, "ye-yeah, haha, of course you will cuz you're like the best one here"
Damn straight, son.
Why are there assholes like this out there? I can't imagine talking to someone like this.
@@c.s1393 one reason they lack the skill that requires two creatures to work called intelligence.
This is sad
You got some good control. I would of been in his face. But you did good, bro.
Russel's smile at 7:50 is the most masterful, subtle "gotcha" I've ever seen.
Ikr! 😆👏 I watched that part a few times, that subtle smile was great! I know how it is when you do this and people still just don't get it 😒😂🙄 I'm over here taking mad notes 😃🤣🤣
They underestimate Russel, and he is sharper than they think. Master of language on two continents, and obviously human behavior.
Michael Rivera
I like how you made him bilingual.
He's pretty gifted. Very few have mastered both the English language and the English language.
Sharper? Mate he literally swallowed the dictionary.....he is incredibly intelligent, witty and sarcastic without being rude. No one could challenge him and when anyone tries they fail miserably
Sharper than all of them- robots and marionettes...
Quite the opposite, Russell is far dimmer than most of the public realises.
Russel Brand is one of the most intelligent and interesting people on the planet. The quick witted and non shaken foundation that he stands firmly upon is only enhanced by his ability to speak the truth in a manner that leaves his opponent in a submissive state
Russell is especially gifted with language and wit. If I could never be at a loss for words like him, I'm sure I could stay calm in the face of uncomfortable social situations as well.
I must say-these videos are extremely helpful in navigating the weirdness of human behaviors and social interactions. I’m 52 with Asperger’s and have never been able to seamlessly “assimilate”-particularly in the workplace. However, these videos have given me a great toolbox of strategies to use in different situations. While the results haven’t been revolutionary or propelled my career, I have much more confidence and less internal criticism & anxiety
Some workplaces are toxic, not easy to navigate unless your toxic yourself. Glad these videos are helping you out.
The silence and stare works perfectly in classrooms too.
Demanding respect without building ego is definitely a delicate balance. And a big part most people fail is not being respectful themselves.
One time in high school we were in a group talking and one girl insulted me. At that age I normally would've insulted her back, but instead I just locked eyes with her and said, "Well that wasn't very nice. You wouldn't like it if I sat here and pointed out all your flaws, would you?" With that, I don't think she spoke for the next half hour.
That's so perfect! I wish I could do something like as an adult, much less a high school kid
She probably took that as a threat. "Oh shoot! Does he know about this thing and that? Did he notice this and that?"
Females are notoriously insecure.
Beautiful
Well done!! Very mature of you for that age. 👏🏼
Perfect (and very classy) response.
*Be always firm with your stance, integrity and values.*
- Hold an unshakeable posture/frame
- Calm Cool Collected manner, never raise a voice showing emotions
- Respectable logical arguments, if not being treated likewise, leave the premises
Too bad Andrew Neil wasn't using respectable logical arguments when he was with Ben Shapiro in that interrogation.
O'SSÉIN - Master Your Mind With Me thanks man
Ok i guess most people can hold a good posture, or at least fake it. But the other two points are highly dependent on the intelligence of the individual which is not really something you have a great deal of control over.
Showing emotion is actually okay. In fact not showing emotion at all is very unsettling and also unhealthy. The thing you should avoid is getting too worked up by something and being consumed and controlled by your emotions. Being able to remain calm and respectful even when being angry or hurt will show others that you are in control of the situation and have strong enough character to stay strong even when things aren't going your way. Showing that you're angry can even further showcase your strength as long as you don't get consumed by it and show people that you're no longer in control by throwing a tantrum.
@Its Baran yes just be yourself this is crap talk.
Man I'm getting anxiety just thinking how smart, witty, vocabulary strong and confident he is......did i say that he is really hilarious, present, charismatic and charming.....damn the list doesn't end😂
Knowing what you're talking about and having integrity (doing what's right, even when nobody is looking) is key.
Russell has self control, awareness and integrity. Wonderful
When Russel Brand was on JRE, and he took the time to understand Joe’s views on hunting, I realized Russel gives everybody the opportunity to give their side of things. We need more people like him. We’d get along much more easily.
It's meditation mate. When I'm meditating regularly I get far less concerned with other people's silliness. It's all about meditation 💪
So true.
@@danw918 I seriously need to learn how to 🧘♀️. It seems there's different kinds.
Russell handled himself beautifully in these tricky situations. He walked into the lion’s den. That takes a hell of a lot of courage.
I saw his stand up comedy in NYC a couple of decades ago. Incredibly quick wit. Someone actually tried to heckle him and it didn't end well for that heckler. 🤣
@@valmacclinchy it amazes me when people heckle comedians! It never ends well for heckler
@@arribaficationwineho32 exactly!
@@arribaficationwineho32 I saw Jack Dee live and a few times people actually joined in and shouted their own comments out riffing on what he was saying. It wasn't like watching a show, it was like being in a pub with a mate.
The man has lived a life much harder and survived .A morning show cannot flap him.
I apologise that the middle of my sentence interrupted the beginning of yours.
redditor
That's gold!
What helped me dealing with rude and "Not letting you talk"-people was being nice and happy and never falling out of this role. I think it helps because keeping this consistent happieness shows them that their rude behavior doesnt have any effect on me so they stop trying.
Living a role can lead to bitterness and frustration.
It really highlights how miserable the rude person is being, making them look and feel lame
I started finishing my sentences so yea I’m basically Russell brand now
nice! lmao
Congratulations
I oftent interrupt if I want to respond to what a person has said, and I let someone interrupt if I see they want to respond. If I feel I didn't finish my thought, I just continue talking and usually the other person quiets down. I expect the same, but if I notice that the person never finishes what they say, I will either stop interrupting (or apologise and let them finish if I do it unintentionally) or explain that I expect them to continue talking if they really didn't finish the sentence. Personally I like being interrupted because it shows the other person is engaged in what I'm saying, but obviously it'd be annoying if it kept happening constantly because the other person only wants to hear themselves talk.
I really needed to learn this! I'm trying to stand up for myself around people who are more blatantly rude.
Ashley Stevens from an experience, choose any kind of martial arts and start training without quitting then any one who disrespect you kick their ass
bring a gun or a knife with you. Respect will be earned
These advices won't work for you if you don't have the authority over people that are being rude to you, It only worked with Russel cause he was the guest and the rude people needed him for the content. These advices are for people already with authority that might be challenged by the lower-authority people, all these techniques did for Russel is he was able to NOT fuck up.
@@azozj7 Aikido is great for a female.
@@azozj7 Thats illegal, dont advice my dude to go to jail.
It’s interesting because, obviously not seeing everything in context, several things that were complimented were actually rude and manipulative. Russel’s compliment followed by him basically throwing a verbal punch at the guy for how he’s dressed, may have decreased some tension, but it also was a dig at the dude and likely meant to cut his confidence down a bit. Usually that is to manipulate someone into looking to you for approval. That’s just one example, but I really don’t think Russel is the one anyone should be looking at for behavior modeling.