The more confident you are the less you worry about awkward moments. If theres a pause in a conversation, just let it ride out and chill in the silence. You don’t have to feel awkward about it, its not your job to defend all awkward moments from happening, instead just refuse to acknowledge that its “awkward “
I agree with that completely, the first step to something becoming awkward is giving it any focus. That scene in Pulp Fiction between John Travolta and Uma Thurman comes to mind regarding how to handle the breaks of silence, lol.
But what to do in that silence? When you both are sitting together and eun out of things to say and you have nothing else to do, what to do? I start fiddling with my hands and look around
1. Grease the wheel early with a compliment. 2. Transition between topics using "reminds me of" thinking. 3. Ping for topics of mutual interest. 4. Get other people excited about the conversation. 5. Create a connection with people while listening.
Everything time I come to the comments and find someone who summarizes the video in to something very is to take in, i just smile with my whole body. thanks man ur awesome !
@@Reality-Distortion Either fake it till you make it, or do the more productive thing which is to convince your local legislature to legalize brothels/prostitution.
@@tiphotisted Doing the first, results are okayish I guess. Prostitution here is already legal though it's gray area with no taxes, insurances etc. Pimping is illegal which shouldn't change in my opinion so pass on the brothel part.
1. Grease the wheels early with a compliment. Good energy or a platonic physical compliment. Don't dwell on the compliment or it will seem fake. Make it a genuine one, something you actually think. 2. Reminds me of thinking. Use lateral thinking to transition to something else you both can talk about. Don't know anything about baseball - talk about the atmosphere of a stadium. 3. Pings for topics of mutual interest. 4. Get other people excited about the conversation. Peel the onion. Absorb what is important to them from the innocuous questions. Ask questions that are fun to answer: "What do you?", followed by "Do you like it? 5. Create a connection. Laugh easily. Don't fake it but don't restrict it. Watch something funny before you meet people. 6. Mirroring. Makes them feel heard. Builds rapport. Stay true to yourself ultimately but repeating someone's final words at the end tells them you are listening initially.
@Vontez What Krystian Nowak said, but I'll add that you also shouldn't use self-deprication about something you're actually insecure about. People usually notice and it displays a lack of confidence.
I used to be awkward around strangers. 10 years as a butcher made me the KING of small talk though. I could entertain everyone and their grandmother. They call me the BUTCHER CLOWN now.
That must mean you're interesting and funny even when you were introverted, it was just because you didn't connect with people much at the time. Inspirational!
I used to feel uncomfortable and insecure when I had to small talk. But one day I realized it’s not completely my job to keep the conversation going. It’s just 50/50, cause the other person has to make small talk to. Since then, I don’t feel uncomfortable when there’s is a silence in the conversation. It helped me to relax more and when you’re relaxed, small talk becomes way easier.
It does, but it's different when it's a talk show...or when it's one of your friends/relatives that it turns more into a monolog...or especially when you don't care about having small talk with this person...it becomes very awkward then..I don't know how these people pretend to care, or..maybe they do.
Seriously this is why I hate tinder. I'm happy with the matches I get but when I strike a conversation I try to say something that invokes a reply that isn't just yes or no but women find a way to always answer in a way that I'm left with the responsibility of keeping the conversation going. And honestly I don't care enough to do so. If it's a test to see if I'm funny or something like that I won't even bother passing those kinds of tests because to me it just shows they aren't willing to put any effort into it and I'm supposed to try to win them over I don't think that's how it works in the real life.
'What does this remind me of?' is an excellent authentic approach to continuing a conversation with others you may not have much in common with. That being said, it is also important to drop the conversation when it gets stale or if you hit awkward or unwelcome territory.
You bail out of every conversation as soon as it gets stale? lol silence is okay sometimes. You gotta be comfortable with yourself, no conversation is going to be 100% perfect every time
Ive never considered this. You're right. I do feel great after a successful conversation with a stranger. All my endorphins start flooding my brain and makes me feel good about myself. I struggle with speaking to people.
The power of language and expression is incredible. I wish I'd have realized when I was younger how much I absolutely love the dynamic of communication, both verbal and non-verbal and all of the various nuance related to each. It's one of the first things people noticed as we shifted towards more written communication (Email, Text, Comments) that there's no real, for example, sarcasm font. Compared to verbal communication, with tone, inflection, and accompanying mannerisms like a smirk or tilt of the head, written communication is just flat.
This video just explained why people on weed r so nice to talk to, they laugh all the time, make crazy question and make a lot of conections between subjects.
I made a connection between the grocery store and a casino how with no windows it looks the same no matter what time of day it is. I made this statement to a coworker and she was just like ... ok
I personally love small talk, it allows you to ease into all the “interesting stuff”. I like to take my time opening up, and I need to gauge the other person before I do just that. So I rather not skip the small talk. It’s like foreplay, but for good conversations lol
Something I've found as well is if I'm talking to someone and feel awkward it's often them not being good with small talk and you end up feeling like you did something wrong.
It may not be your situation but I realized that my lack of "personality" and social anxiety came from growing up in a quiet, awkward home that never really rewarded open, charismatic behavior. I would go over to a friend's house who was very social with random strangers and his home was a talk and laugh fest. Looking back now I realize that I'm not anti-social or naturally an "introvert". It is something I learned to be through a soft oppression in my home.
Try to find comfort in you are not alone. I think more people than not feel this way. This content is so binge worthy not just to learn about yourself but also understand other or make them feel more comfortable.
it's ok some people have a personality like me that don't want to talk that much but like to listen and think more and personally I don't want to be around someone who is going to talk my ear off
@@chrisb2038 you’re not as boring as you think you are. Drop that mindset and you will see results! Some people just have a much richer inner world than their peers.
This is literally all what I do during my part time as an english speaking teacher in korea. "Why" can be powerful, but don't abuse it. It can become a bit interrogative. Creating a scenario is a good one. Ask "what if" questions. It gives a framework for both parties to create something together.
You make a lot of good points and Joe is excellent at keeping a conversation going. The biggest advantage Joe has is that all of his guests have agreed ahead of time to spend hours of a day and likely travelled to be there just to talk with him. This changes the whole dynamic in that they are already invested heavily prior to the conversation starting.
I think you’re focusing too much on the end result of his success. Joe has real talent, maybe he started with people who were willing to spend 2h but now people want to spend the 2h.
@@jacksonzheng3103 think the dude is saying the man's over here obsessed with Joe is not using the best example. Its a podcast/interview both parties were looking forward to. The best thing to take from here and some points on how to compliment properly to make people be more comfortable with you
seriously. i think ive seen like 4 vids from them and every one talks about joe to some extent. it makes sense though, hes definitely charismatic and a great conversationalist
Cant say that the things Joe says aren’t problematic because they often are. He’s downplayed covid, and often comes off saying his opinion without doing all the research. With so many people who listen to him and follow him, the misinformation is problematic in my opinion. For example, in this video he says he hates fake car engine noises, but oftentimes cars have fake engine noises to warn pedestrians of incoming cars and it’s been documented that cars that are too quiet pose a risk to pedestrians...he’s still a good talker, i just wish there was some disclaimer on these videos that tell you “Joe Rogan isn’t perfect, but...”
@@adonisng157you don't need a disclaimer to know he's not an expert at those things. I don't need moderation or disclaimers for individuals that take everything too seriously.
The best think I found is that everyone is interesting in their own way. You can literally talk to just about anyone. All you have to do is listen. That’s it. If you can learn to listen and comprehend which IS a skill. You’re golden
me on a date at a restaurant: so, you like food? her: um yeah lol me: are you a foodie? her: not really? me: a fancy word for "foodie" is "epicure" which comes from the ancient Greek philosopher Epicurus...*proceeds to ramble about ancient Greek philosophy and literature for an hour* *notices she's gone; keeps going*
@@sjuvanet I mean but arent band kids the ones who would be getting into Ancient Greek philosophy. Or is it Ancient Greek mythology they’d be getting into
@@blobbykins7281 probably no philosophical school of thought with true virtue. and they'd definitely go for mythology over philosophy, absent of the stories' archetypal messages.
I've been mirroring people all wrong. I've been waiting for people to come into bathrooms, and when they do, I smile, make eye contact through the mirror, and say "WHAT BRINGS YOU HERE?!"
Things I learned from this video: 1.) Asking why might be annoying, but is the best way to get the root of the subject and have an interesting conversation. 2.) Laughing is the best way to lighten the mood and take the awkwardness out of the picture. 3.) Compliments are the best way to start a conversation.
"Joe asks questions which are fun to answer, for example-" *Ad starts* "Wanna watch meerkats without interruptions?" This is single handedly the most useful episode I've watched, thanks guys
In the beginning of the conversation, 1. Grease the wheels by giving them a compliment of either their Work, Energy, Or Physical Appearance. Do not make it too sexual, and think of a genuine compliment to those who may be complimented a lot. 2. Use reminds me of thinking. When you are in a conversation think to yourself what does this most remind me of, could be an object, a movie, an actor, or a funny appearance, and use lateral transition to something the both of you could enjoy talking about. 3. Ping things to other topics of interest, create a web of ideas and thinking that stems from whatever was mentioned. until you find mutual common interests. 4. get people to become excited about the conversation once they are speaking. Peel back the onion and ask deeper why questions. For them to tell you why and what is important to them. 5. Create a connection/ let them make you laugh. Allow yourself to laugh when they talk, don't fake laughter let it be genuine. 6. Mirroring, repeating the last 1 - 3 words to make them feel heard. Do not do it too often stay true to yourself and don't copy every sentence. It is a way to interrupt while allowing them to feel heard and to build rapport.
Joe is highly underrated as a communicator. He comes off as crude to some, but he is highly intelligent and will methodically work you into a corner if you’re spitting B.S. and then masterly backs off and redirects once he tore you down, but before you get too combative. It’s a roller coaster to watch him play with some people!
Yes. I have seen Joe do that to some of his guests. Joe's sure he's more correct about some issue, he'll push it for a bit, but then back off into a more agreeable two-way conversation.
@Pepe Pupu wait, so you mean a successful podcast host who interviews people, guiding long conversations for a living is manipulative? Will someone nominate this man for a Nobel Peace Price; what a revelation!
After watching hours and hours and hours of podcast I could tell my conversational skills are better. People have said I am fun and not boring to talk to. I like having super long conversations now.
Not to mention Joe does something I absolutely love and wish every person did which is they act like they've known you forever and are super warm, friendly, joyful toward you right when they meet you, and it doesn't feel like there's an invisible awkward wall between the two of you. I try and do that but man social anxiety doesn't make it easy.
I disagree with asking people "why" questions. It's subtly confrontational. People tend to have a visceral reaction to "why" as if they're being accused of something--it's very deep and goes back to childhood when parents would ask things like "why did you do that?!" This is not to say you can't ask that kind of question, just avoid the word "why." So change it up by asking "what made you decide to ..." or "what led you to ..."
AAAAAAHHHHH!!!! PAAAAAIIIINNNN!!!!!! I broke my hand yesterday because of the hate comments I get on my amazing videos. I was so angry that I punched a hole in my computer. Please don't comment anything mean on my wonderful videos, dear jim
My wife is a master at small talk and I just never understood how she did it. She can keep a conversation going for hours with people. Maybe that’s just most women 🤔 . This is helpful for me because I’m an introvert, I avoid parties or places where I’d have to small talk with strangers because it’s so exhausting to me.
Women get a lot of practice keep in mind, lots of men in the courting phase gonna small chat them up so they do get the opportunity to practice those skills. Vs men have to go out of their way to chat up women(generally, unless you're Brad Pitt)
Summary of this Video, hope it helps. 1. Start with a compliment about their work, energy or physical. mistakes possibly -to Sexual -Make it genuine 2.Transition with "this reminds me of (blank)" If you don't like a new topic then remind or compare it to something you like. 3. Look for topics of sharing interest. 4.Get others to be excited about the topic by asking whys questions. Ask the first question like where do you live? then why? Ask questions that are fun and unrealistic. 5. Create a connection by laughing. The more you laugh the easier it becomes. Mirror others by repeating last 3 words to make this feel heard. Stay true to yourself and not pick your words so slowly.
1. when you first meet, compliment them. examples are thank you so much for being here; I love being around people like you, you are going for sht all the time and it’s amazing because you give out so much energy; nice to meet you; congrats on the engagement. Compliments to avoid: sexual, making a compliment we don’t mean, Don't dwell on compliments; it means when conversation focuses more on the compliment than the actual topic. Especially with high-status people who oftem receive compliments, they might not value them much. It's better to swiftly shift from the compliment to the main conversation topic. 2. Smoothly transition to new topics: employ the "reminds me of" technique. When asked a question, use your answer as a way to steer the conversation to a new topic in relation to the previous topic. This is done by mentally asking yourself, "What does this remind me of?" Dont just answer the question, elaborate. if you were asked a question about a topic that you’re not interested in, use lateral thinking to transition to something else. an example of this would be: Interviewer: “are you a fan of baseball crowd noise?” Interviewee: “No I’m not a fan of the noise. I hated when cars do that. They…” 3. mentioned topics that you think you both have interest: Talk about topics that you like and if the other looks excited, then keep it going. don’t talk about stuff if you don’t think the other is going to like. 4. getting other people excited about the conversation: don’t ask yes-no questions. instead, ask “why” question to get someone talking about what they value. Ex: where do you live? Why do you live there? Ex: what do you do for work? Why did you decide to do that? This way, you can hear what’s important to them and you can center the topic around that. 5. Ask questions that are fun to answer like what-ifs, if you, hypothetical, favorite, would you rather, personal stories, 6. create a connection with people while talking: allow yourself to laugh, but don’t think laugh. Laugh when you find something funny. 7. make the other feel heard by mirroring. it’s when you repeat the last few words that the other person said. Its a way to interrupt it without ignoring the other person.
Lol my partner is the same. He’s made so many friends + opportunities just being naturally himself (a confident socializer) I watch him flow effortlessly into conversations with random strangers so often. As someone who is social but not as outgoing, meaning I rarely strike up whole conversations with absolute strangers, usually just small talk that ends quickly. Sometimes there are people whoare just easy to click with but it surely takes a skillful flow to navigate convo with just anyone at anytime. Lucky you haha
@@Fortheloveoforthodoxing I think that's like 99.9% upbringing. Whenever i was a kid and went out with my dad that's what he did, random jokes and conversations with ppl so now when i go out I do similar. Pretty sure your partner just had a(n) outgoing parent(s).
I was an already very outgoing , talkative and charismatic person. I was still a little awkward sometimes when meeting someone new. I recently have gotten my first job as a waiter. I have been doing this for about 6 months and I undoubtedly feel more confident (then I already was) talking to new people and being able to communicate in a nice polite way that makes people have an enjoyable energy when I am speaking with them. PARENTS 1000% recommend pushing something in service industry as a first job for kids like me to grow and become independent when communicating with people. I find myself when with my parents introduce me to new people I instantly make a good impression and leave a good thought of myself to them. Great for networking and building VALUABLE communication skills with people
its weird after youve been in a relationship for a long time you forget how to make small talk without being repetitive this is definitely going to help
Joe is making "small talk" with people that can be searched up online and see what talking points can be good so the conversations dont just halt. When you meet someone for the first time you just have to figure it out.
Yeah imagine meeting someone for the first time and not knowing anything about them and then state "I love being around people like you" hahaha Fcking AWKWARD
i mean that guys beard was pretty easy to notice. you can also use that energy card slightly down the line after maybe you ask them a couple personal questions that would reveal some things about their character
This is normal socializing . Just make sure you do active listening . People are all interesting and have a treasure chest experience . Just listening and respond appropriately
I guess I have already learned this through a lifetime of experience. Being yourself and not worrying about what others think makes conversation easy and genuine. If you understand that you are speaking with another person created in God's image, with infinite value. And realize that their opinion really matters. Going through the entire conversation with love, gratitude and respect. Then its always easy.
So the list is 1. Compliment with positive vibe. eg. on work, energy, platonic physical genuine compliment(beard, etc) now to not to be overly complimenting 2. Transition between topics using “reminds me of” thinking. than to give any experience or any reminders to another stuff, than to other reminders in recurring. if you said "no", say why of no and get things to new topics. 3. Ping for topics of mutual interest. Immediate connections. deeper connections 4. Make people exited for stuffs ;- a. where do live? why ?OR what you work ? why? deeper understandings. not any interesting in conversations b. Fun to answer questions = you had magic wand? you are king of the world? to the answers that are "no" 5. a. Laughs easily on other persons stuff... b. mirroring words = make them heard by last 3 words, and for rapport to take control of conversation. BUT dont be a copycat. Be Authentic true to yourself.
Such a good instructional vid. Im a big fan of listening too. So many people start a subject then interject because they're really more desperate to tell you about their experience not actually hear yours . Nobody listens anymore. Joe nails both aspects of conversing and listening. Love the guy.
I do not know why I am here. I suppose with all this "it's the "DUH-HUH Left" "it's the "DUH-HUH Left"" nonsense I was just looking to get a few things off my chest. Now I am her e I do not know what
I have to thank you for this video because I am an ESL teacher and a Russian student of mine is self conscious of her inability to small talk. I've been going over the basics but this is where I'll be going next 👍
I often find myself in a position where I’m tryna have some small talk but the other person makes it awkward and then I don’t know what to do so I become awkward
I’ve met a couple of awkward ppl. They have one word answers and don’t really ask questions so its very difficult to have a back and forth convo. After a while I realise that’s just who they are, awkward rational geeky type who can’t do small talk but they’re actually comfortable not silence. Either you have to learn to get comfortable around them, or find other friends.
Oh I hate that so much...it's like you're the only person who is talking or showing any interest. Or...maybe you don't know how to continue it, but yeah, that is super awkward.
I watched many of your videos, but I'm a new subscriber. I'm nearly 57 years old, and have always been/ felt a pariah. I have to admit, your observations and advice are eye-opening, even for someone my age. If only I'd had a resource like this when I was younger...
If you have trouble holding eye contact, don't look in the eyes! Instead, look in between them. The other person won't notice the difference and you'll appear more confident
I don't think that's true. They might just think there's something on the bridge of their nose and feel self concious and awkward after. I mean, its pretty easy to recognize eye contact, same goes for the absence of it.
I learnt once to hold eye contact, but don't look all the time. Look away for a moment sometimes or blink. That way it's more comfortable for both of you
bonus tip,something i do is assume something i think is probably gonna be wrong about the person and then ask if i happen to be right or wrong. dont assume something thats overly offensive though,this convo starter gets them having to defend whats actually right about themselves and therefore get them more invested in the convo
Thank you so much for making this channel! I have honestly seen a HUGE improvement in my social life, confidence, and even self image! I finally feel like I can talk to anyone I want. I used to feel like I was socially awkward, but not anymore!!!
The reason why a study like this is good but then it won't help as much is because people would want to try this out but forget one thing: Joe means what he says when he says it. If your goal is to woo someone just to woo them and have them make small talk with you, compliment all you want, they'll sense something being off. Joe pulls it off because he's genuine. So I'd say be a fan of someone, learn about them and only approach or expect this to work if it's coming from you heart.
It’s kind of crazy how when I was a kid I use to be so terrible at talking in general, especially to women I was interested in. But as I grew older it just sort of came naturally and what I see in this video is exactly with a few more things I never new about. So I’m interested to see how much of an improvement my conversations are with this current girl I’ve just started talking to
It's practice. I bet you went out and failed at conversations a bunch, right? Then got better? I doubt any basement dweller got better by avoiding social interactions(like me :D).
I really appreciate your videos. As someone with mild Asperger's its frustrating recognizing how awkward a conversation is and not having the means to fix it. I'm really, really thankful for this.
I'm so glad this popped up in my feed. I have been making an effort to be more social, but i don't have great social skills. Obviously, it's not something you're born with; it's something you learn. Joe seems to have a genuine interest in others. That's the first thing i have to grind into my brain. People like it when you seem to genuinely care about them.
After watching this I realized that Ive naturally done all of these things my whole life and I’ve always been extremely good at small talk or connecting with anybody. Boosted my confidence a little bit haha Being a great conversationalist is a hard skill to acquire and make it seem natural.
Just ask questions. People love talking about themselves. Ask them if they have brothers and sisters. Where they are from. Etc. Also ask creative questions too, like "You are trapped on a deserted Island, what 3 books do you bring and why?" I learned this through my job.
I watched the bunch of these conversation videos tonight, and this one is by far the best of the bunch. He gives good clear examples to make his point.
This was helpful, I forgot how to socialize after 2020
Wil Dasovich what u doin here wil lol
Way to reiterate the top comment.
@@afrothunder142 freeman my boyyyyy!!! You’re an og
Facts 🤣
@@DivineBia wassup gangsta
Him: how old are you
Her: I’m 22
Him: why?
Her: Thank you...
lmao
😂😂😂
This is why you should never ask a woman her age...
Damn u... U made me lmao!!
Me re-learning social skills after spending a year inside
Forreal
Highly accurate... I’m literally taking notes
I feel like a social vegetable y’all 😂
deadass tho
Same
The more confident you are the less you worry about awkward moments. If theres a pause in a conversation, just let it ride out and chill in the silence. You don’t have to feel awkward about it, its not your job to defend all awkward moments from happening, instead just refuse to acknowledge that its “awkward “
I agree with that completely, the first step to something becoming awkward is giving it any focus. That scene in Pulp Fiction between John Travolta and Uma Thurman comes to mind regarding how to handle the breaks of silence, lol.
But what to do in that silence? When you both are sitting together and eun out of things to say and you have nothing else to do, what to do? I start fiddling with my hands and look around
I wish I thought that on my last date
@@SierraHanna-qv4bmPick up a guitar
@@maxpayne4129HOLY REALLL
“Talk to someone about themselves and they'll listen for hours.”
― Dale Carnegie
im famous
I'm FBI open up
I find it not correct in many cases
Unless they are uncomfortable with it. Quotes just sound cool. Easily refutable.
@@captlanc well, since its work to majority, why you care to the minority?
1. Grease the wheel early with a compliment.
2. Transition between topics using "reminds me of" thinking.
3. Ping for topics of mutual interest.
4. Get other people excited about the conversation.
5. Create a connection with people while listening.
6. Mention DMT and the snake goddess
Too much work.
Everything time I come to the comments and find someone who summarizes the video in to something very is to take in, i just smile with my whole body. thanks man ur awesome !
@@bhe8336
Ask interesting why questions of their choice.
@@furyberserk that made no sense
We all want to feel funny, valued, and loved.
Please make a video with Daniel Radcliffe!!!
Kurt Look7 p
I’m on
@Kurt Look7 o
Simp
A huge part of small talk is being genuinely interested in the conversation, with whomever it may be.
What would you do if you usually lacked any interest?
@@Reality-Distortion get good at faking charisma. the you'll naturally build it
@@Reality-Distortion Either fake it till you make it, or do the more productive thing which is to convince your local legislature to legalize brothels/prostitution.
@@tiphotisted Doing the first, results are okayish I guess. Prostitution here is already legal though it's gray area with no taxes, insurances etc. Pimping is illegal which shouldn't change in my opinion so pass on the brothel part.
1. Grease the wheels early with a compliment. Good energy or a platonic physical compliment. Don't dwell on the compliment or it will seem fake. Make it a genuine one, something you actually think.
2. Reminds me of thinking. Use lateral thinking to transition to something else you both can talk about. Don't know anything about baseball - talk about the atmosphere of a stadium.
3. Pings for topics of mutual interest.
4. Get other people excited about the conversation. Peel the onion. Absorb what is important to them from the innocuous questions. Ask questions that are fun to answer: "What do you?", followed by "Do you like it?
5. Create a connection. Laugh easily. Don't fake it but don't restrict it. Watch something funny before you meet people.
6. Mirroring. Makes them feel heard. Builds rapport. Stay true to yourself ultimately but repeating someone's final words at the end tells them you are listening initially.
Please make a video with Daniel Radcliffe!!!
@Vontez Just don't do it often, will make people ignore your opinion
Thanks for saving me 11 minutes
@Vontez What Krystian Nowak said, but I'll add that you also shouldn't use self-deprication about something you're actually insecure about. People usually notice and it displays a lack of confidence.
Her : My father diead yesterday
Him : Oh your father died yesterday ?
Her : Yes
Him : Did you like it ?
I used to be awkward around strangers. 10 years as a butcher made me the KING of small talk though.
I could entertain everyone and their grandmother. They call me the BUTCHER CLOWN now.
Should I be calling the cops?
i don't know how to interpret this comment....
That sounds straight out of a horror movie
That must mean you're interesting and funny even when you were introverted, it was just because you didn't connect with people much at the time. Inspirational!
that's a great serial killer name congrats bro
I used to feel uncomfortable and insecure when I had to small talk. But one day I realized it’s not completely my job to keep the conversation going. It’s just 50/50, cause the other person has to make small talk to. Since then, I don’t feel uncomfortable when there’s is a silence in the conversation. It helped me to relax more and when you’re relaxed, small talk becomes way easier.
It does, but it's different when it's a talk show...or when it's one of your friends/relatives that it turns more into a monolog...or especially when you don't care about having small talk with this person...it becomes very awkward then..I don't know how these people pretend to care, or..maybe they do.
Yep.
Silence in a public and social setting is inevitable, if it's perceived as awkward it is. I don't find silence as awkward anymore
Seriously this is why I hate tinder. I'm happy with the matches I get but when I strike a conversation I try to say something that invokes a reply that isn't just yes or no but women find a way to always answer in a way that I'm left with the responsibility of keeping the conversation going. And honestly I don't care enough to do so. If it's a test to see if I'm funny or something like that I won't even bother passing those kinds of tests because to me it just shows they aren't willing to put any effort into it and I'm supposed to try to win them over I don't think that's how it works in the real life.
@@98MTBiker Yeah, in real life, there are stakes. On the internet, there are no real stakes.
'What does this remind me of?' is an excellent authentic approach to continuing a conversation with others you may not have much in common with. That being said, it is also important to drop the conversation when it gets stale or if you hit awkward or unwelcome territory.
You bail out of every conversation as soon as it gets stale? lol silence is okay sometimes. You gotta be comfortable with yourself, no conversation is going to be 100% perfect every time
Ok but he's going to wonder why I up and left in the middle of dinner...
One of the most fulfilling things in life is a solid conversation. You feel like you accomplished something. And you have.
Ive never considered this. You're right. I do feel great after a successful conversation with a stranger. All my endorphins start flooding my brain and makes me feel good about myself. I struggle with speaking to people.
Is it always to both people fullfilling?
It's only fulfilling because it strokes your ego. Oh someone paid attention to me look at how important I am.
@@bhe8336 when it's fullfilling for both sides is when it's been a good conversation. I think.
@@bhe8336 Clearly never had a good conversation with anyone 😂👌🏽
In the middle of a conversation
*Pulls out note cards*
🤣!
* pause *
DMT!
I would pulled out a kit-Kat and crunch on it 😆 0:08
@@Frank074 Hahaha, would totally pull out the dmt card when I'm stuck
@@Frank074 is
Joe: How old are you?
Guest: 35
Joe: I first did DMT when I was 35
35? No really, that's the number of alkaloids in my favorite cannabis strain
Great convo starter if your really think about it LMAO
😂
@@davyddocarmocabral2989 Cannabis, what a great plant, isn't it? Actually you can make cloth with it.
😂😂😂😂
The power of language and expression is incredible. I wish I'd have realized when I was younger how much I absolutely love the dynamic of communication, both verbal and non-verbal and all of the various nuance related to each. It's one of the first things people noticed as we shifted towards more written communication (Email, Text, Comments) that there's no real, for example, sarcasm font. Compared to verbal communication, with tone, inflection, and accompanying mannerisms like a smirk or tilt of the head, written communication is just flat.
This video just explained why people on weed r so nice to talk to, they laugh all the time, make crazy question and make a lot of conections between subjects.
Similar effect from alcohol.
I made a connection between the grocery store and a casino how with no windows it looks the same no matter what time of day it is. I made this statement to a coworker and she was just like ... ok
Weed makes me awkward af around people
Talking to people on weed is sooo annoying, they make up nonsense that I really can't be bothered with. Waste of time
Me with ADHD not being able to sit on a single topic for more than 45 seconds lol
Tell people you can't do small talk. They often agree that they can't either and dive right into interesting stuff.
@AggrievedCommenter huh?
cameron martin look at his username 😂.
And if they dont agree they go away .. win win
@@Hx3ney haha true. Although if they're shy then better to switch to any option in this video to make them feel at ease. At least for a while anyway 😅
I personally love small talk, it allows you to ease into all the “interesting stuff”. I like to take my time opening up, and I need to gauge the other person before I do just that. So I rather not skip the small talk. It’s like foreplay, but for good conversations lol
Her: Hi
Him: Hi, nice hair.
Her Thanks
Him: My back hair reminds me of Khabib Nurmagomedov.
Her: Anyway, have a nice day.
Did you smesh?
LMAOOO
😂😂😂 Every time I read this it gets funnier
Im dead
Becky, lemme
Something I've found as well is if I'm talking to someone and feel awkward it's often them not being good with small talk and you end up feeling like you did something wrong.
Watching this realizing I do all of this while I’m drunk but am a step away from a brick wall when I’m sober
This is spot on 🤣🤣🤣
This couldn’t be more accurate^^^
This is how alcoholics are born 💁🏻♂️
@@Adriiell I bet you’re really fun at parties
I mean this nicely, sounds like you need to get more confidence
I just realized my social anxiety is so bad that I willfully watched a video on how to talk to other people.
It may not be your situation but I realized that my lack of "personality" and social anxiety came from growing up in a quiet, awkward home that never really rewarded open, charismatic behavior. I would go over to a friend's house who was very social with random strangers and his home was a talk and laugh fest. Looking back now I realize that I'm not anti-social or naturally an "introvert". It is something I learned to be through a soft oppression in my home.
Try to find comfort in you are not alone. I think more people than not feel this way. This content is so binge worthy not just to learn about yourself but also understand other or make them feel more comfortable.
it's ok some people have a personality like me that don't want to talk that much but like to listen and think more and personally I don't want to be around someone who is going to talk my ear off
@@johnwirk wow man im in the exact same boat as you? are we just permanently boring now?
@@chrisb2038 you’re not as boring as you think you are. Drop that mindset and you will see results! Some people just have a much richer inner world than their peers.
There is a reason why the JRE podcast is the number 1.
DMT
I feel greatly aggravated by your pfp
Americans are easily pleased.
Ben Hall number one podcast “worldwide”
Google Isevil Fair enough. People in general are easily pleased/entertained
This is literally all what I do during my part time as an english speaking teacher in korea.
"Why" can be powerful, but don't abuse it. It can become a bit interrogative.
Creating a scenario is a good one. Ask "what if" questions. It gives a framework for both parties to create something together.
You make a lot of good points and Joe is excellent at keeping a conversation going. The biggest advantage Joe has is that all of his guests have agreed ahead of time to spend hours of a day and likely travelled to be there just to talk with him. This changes the whole dynamic in that they are already invested heavily prior to the conversation starting.
I think you’re focusing too much on the end result of his success. Joe has real talent, maybe he started with people who were willing to spend 2h but now people want to spend the 2h.
Ur right, it does help but it's not like you have to be an interviewer to talk to someone.
@@jacksonzheng3103 think the dude is saying the man's over here obsessed with Joe is not using the best example. Its a podcast/interview both parties were looking forward to. The best thing to take from here and some points on how to compliment properly to make people be more comfortable with you
Normally the guests don't even realize it's been 3 hours. He keeps them talking and interested. He is the best at what he does.
Just like on a date with a girl, or with anyone.
This channel should be called "How to be More Like Joe Rogan."
seriously. i think ive seen like 4 vids from them and every one talks about joe to some extent. it makes sense though, hes definitely charismatic and a great conversationalist
And Craig Ferguson
You could argue that Joe is one of the best at talking with people in the world, maybe thats why:d
Cant say that the things Joe says aren’t problematic because they often are. He’s downplayed covid, and often comes off saying his opinion without doing all the research. With so many people who listen to him and follow him, the misinformation is problematic in my opinion. For example, in this video he says he hates fake car engine noises, but oftentimes cars have fake engine noises to warn pedestrians of incoming cars and it’s been documented that cars that are too quiet pose a risk to pedestrians...he’s still a good talker, i just wish there was some disclaimer on these videos that tell you “Joe Rogan isn’t perfect, but...”
@@adonisng157you don't need a disclaimer to know he's not an expert at those things. I don't need moderation or disclaimers for individuals that take everything too seriously.
me at the bar after watchin this video:
"so, where are you from?"
"Melbourne."
"Why?"
Hahahahaha
Melbourne wow... have you tried DMT?
@@blvck_truffl3756 LMAO
Ahh a fellow melbournian
@@blvck_truffl3756 😂😂😂😂
The best think I found is that everyone is interesting in their own way. You can literally talk to just about anyone. All you have to do is listen. That’s it. If you can learn to listen and comprehend which IS a skill. You’re golden
me on a date at a restaurant: so, you like food?
her: um yeah lol
me: are you a foodie?
her: not really?
me: a fancy word for "foodie" is "epicure" which comes from the ancient Greek philosopher Epicurus...*proceeds to ramble about ancient Greek philosophy and literature for an hour* *notices she's gone; keeps going*
Edit: notices she’s gone and keeps going on about it to the whole band class
@@blobbykins7281 please do not associate philosophy with autism. the reason why you shouldn't is because they are the same thing.
@@sjuvanet I mean but arent band kids the ones who would be getting into Ancient Greek philosophy. Or is it Ancient Greek mythology they’d be getting into
😂😂
@@blobbykins7281 probably no philosophical school of thought with true virtue. and they'd definitely go for mythology over philosophy, absent of the stories' archetypal messages.
Me: Dude I hate Mondays.
Stranger: What's the most you ever lost on a coin toss?
Everything
Hahaha great movie
@@mikeyabercrombie2855 if you liked that movie I recommend Cormick McCarthy's books
@@raunchymangos7468 Thanos
Yeah man I hate Mondays too. What's the worst thing that's ever happened to you on a Monday?
I've been mirroring people all wrong. I've been waiting for people to come into bathrooms, and when they do, I smile, make eye contact through the mirror, and say "WHAT BRINGS YOU HERE?!"
Next time hand them a towl and wait for a tip
What business haveth you in this bathroom brethren
😂 come on that has to work great!
Imagining this in real life just cracks me up. I want to try this now.
i bet you're fun at parties
Things I learned from this video:
1.) Asking why might be annoying, but is the best way to get the root of the subject and have an interesting conversation.
2.) Laughing is the best way to lighten the mood and take the awkwardness out of the picture.
3.) Compliments are the best way to start a conversation.
Problem is the guy is trying to sell his programme
asking "Why?" questions gets everyone to open up
"Why are you feeling sad?"
"I don't know, google it up."
@Biff Malibu it only becomes judgemental basdd on the tone in which it is used
Why do you think it does?
My only question to the, “why” is, wouldn’t it come across as nosey or prying?
@@bluetickbeagles116 depends on the context - obviously you wouldn't go asking why why why to anyone and everyone ha
There is one BIG note - he knows everything about his guest and he has studied everything about them.He simply knows that he likes cars or wrestling.
Then on podcast with Elon it turns out he never saw Falcon 9 landing 😂
So why does he need these empty questions then?
@@nvmffs "everything" was an overstatement
exactly. this stuff doesnt always help when youre meeting new people, but it CAN help.
So stalk people and get to know everything about them before engaging in small talk, got it.
“How to appear human” would also be an appropriate role.
why did i write role?
Yeah I feel like I naturally do these things. I didn’t get much out of this video
We have the same Exact name 😮
@@santosgil9123 woah dude
Zuckerberg: "Write that down, write that down"
"Joe asks questions which are fun to answer, for example-"
*Ad starts*
"Wanna watch meerkats without interruptions?"
This is single handedly the most useful episode I've watched, thanks guys
I got "AI will end you"
You too 😂
Solid points, especially the mirroring. Making the person feel heard and generally continuing the conversation.
Yup, continuing the conversation... You know, that reminds me of nothing at all because my mind is blank.
W
In the beginning of the conversation, 1. Grease the wheels by giving them a compliment of either their Work, Energy, Or Physical Appearance. Do not make it too sexual, and think of a genuine compliment to those who may be complimented a lot.
2. Use reminds me of thinking. When you are in a conversation think to yourself what does this most remind me of, could be an object, a movie, an actor, or a funny appearance, and use lateral transition to something the both of you could enjoy talking about.
3. Ping things to other topics of interest, create a web of ideas and thinking that stems from whatever was mentioned. until you find mutual common interests. 4. get people to become excited about the conversation once they are speaking. Peel back the onion and ask deeper why questions. For them to tell you why and what is important to them. 5. Create a connection/ let them make you laugh. Allow yourself to laugh when they talk, don't fake laughter let it be genuine. 6. Mirroring, repeating the last 1 - 3 words to make them feel heard. Do not do it too often stay true to yourself and don't copy every sentence. It is a way to interrupt while allowing them to feel heard and to build rapport.
Great summary!
Thanks so much dude ❤️❤️. You saving ppl hella time to write a summary by doing this
Joe is highly underrated as a communicator. He comes off as crude to some, but he is highly intelligent and will methodically work you into a corner if you’re spitting B.S. and then masterly backs off and redirects once he tore you down, but before you get too combative. It’s a roller coaster to watch him play with some people!
@Peyton Pendley no, these are subconscious techniques that come off natural because they're natural based on experience and wisdom
Where can you learn this skill…
Yes. I have seen Joe do that to some of his guests. Joe's sure he's more correct about some issue, he'll push it for a bit, but then back off into a more agreeable two-way conversation.
@Pepe Pupu wait, so you mean a successful podcast host who interviews people, guiding long conversations for a living is manipulative?
Will someone nominate this man for a Nobel Peace Price; what a revelation!
Ex fyfyEd and cm😢e Dr. Red Dr. Red
After watching hours and hours and hours of podcast I could tell my conversational skills are better. People have said I am fun and not boring to talk to. I like having super long conversations now.
Not to mention Joe does something I absolutely love and wish every person did which is they act like they've known you forever and are super warm, friendly, joyful toward you right when they meet you, and it doesn't feel like there's an invisible awkward wall between the two of you. I try and do that but man social anxiety doesn't make it easy.
As "the quiet guy" that speaks when spoken to, this helps alot, thanks
i'm super quiet too, hopefully we can both get some use out of this :)
Same bro I have NPC energy
@@flipgirl3479 sounds mad creepy when you put it like that
"Where do you live?"
"Bla bla-"
"Why do you live?"
“What do you like to eat”
“Why do you like to eat”
😂😂😂
🤣 Under-rated comment
I can’t lmfaooooooooo
W h y
I disagree with asking people "why" questions. It's subtly confrontational. People tend to have a visceral reaction to "why" as if they're being accused of something--it's very deep and goes back to childhood when parents would ask things like "why did you do that?!" This is not to say you can't ask that kind of question, just avoid the word "why." So change it up by asking "what made you decide to ..." or "what led you to ..."
small talks actually really easy if you don't care what other people think about you and just have enough confidence in yourself
As a barber who small talks for a living, this was cool to see someone else described those little things i see in small talk. Great video!
Social and financial skills are such important skills to have and will be helpful to get you the most out of life!
I now watch your channel to relearn social skills after years of bipolar depression and isolation. Thank you for making these.
I forgot how to act with people when my dad started putting me down treating me like s*** and having no sense of worth so forth so thank you for this
Kewl
I grew up super extroverted but realized as i became an adult that i have horrible conversational skills. You are a life saver
why?
@@samyscars cus ive taken way too many psychedelics and my brain go brrr sometimes
@@HealthyKaden BRUH FEELS LMAO
@@HealthyKaden same man
@@HealthyKaden I feel I fried my brain off psychedelics too 🤣
I was just googling how to not be awkward in a coversation and then I get the notification for this video right after, amazing thank you!
AAAAAAHHHHH!!!! PAAAAAIIIINNNN!!!!!!
I broke my hand yesterday because of the hate comments I get on my amazing videos. I was so angry that I punched a hole in my computer. Please don't comment anything mean on my wonderful videos, dear jim
Big brother is watching you dude
The fbi guy assigned to your computer came in clutch
wow that was lucky then :)
My wife is a master at small talk and I just never understood how she did it. She can keep a conversation going for hours with people. Maybe that’s just most women 🤔 . This is helpful for me because I’m an introvert, I avoid parties or places where I’d have to small talk with strangers because it’s so exhausting to me.
Women get a lot of practice keep in mind, lots of men in the courting phase gonna small chat them up so they do get the opportunity to practice those skills. Vs men have to go out of their way to chat up women(generally, unless you're Brad Pitt)
Summary of this Video, hope it helps.
1. Start with a compliment about their work, energy or physical.
mistakes possibly
-to Sexual
-Make it genuine
2.Transition with "this reminds me of (blank)"
If you don't like a new topic then remind or compare it to something you like.
3. Look for topics of sharing interest.
4.Get others to be excited about the topic by asking whys questions.
Ask the first question like where do you live? then why?
Ask questions that are fun and unrealistic.
5. Create a connection by laughing. The more you laugh the easier it becomes.
Mirror others by repeating last 3 words to make this feel heard.
Stay true to yourself and not pick your words so slowly.
How socially anxious people make small talk:
“How are you?”
“I’m good.”
“...Nice talking to you(man, I’m such a legend!)”
Please make a video with Daniel Radcliffe!!!
Socially anxious people after watching this video:
How are you?
Im good
Reminds me of that time when i was good.
you were good.
Why?
Hahahha
So why did you pick this video to watch?....sorry just practicing😂
dmt
Stop calling me out 😂
CBD was a blessing in my life, since Ive been taking It daily small talk is so natural and I feel I always control the conversation
1. when you first meet, compliment them.
examples are thank you so much for being here; I love being around people like you, you are going for sht all the time and it’s amazing because you give out so much energy; nice to meet you; congrats on the engagement.
Compliments to avoid: sexual, making a compliment we don’t mean, Don't dwell on compliments; it means when conversation focuses more on the compliment than the actual topic. Especially with high-status people who oftem receive compliments, they might not value them much. It's better to swiftly shift from the compliment to the main conversation topic.
2. Smoothly transition to new topics: employ the "reminds me of" technique. When asked a question, use your answer as a way to steer the conversation to a new topic in relation to the previous topic. This is done by mentally asking yourself, "What does this remind me of?"
Dont just answer the question, elaborate.
if you were asked a question about a topic that you’re not interested in, use lateral thinking to transition to something else. an example of this would be:
Interviewer: “are you a fan of baseball crowd noise?”
Interviewee: “No I’m not a fan of the noise. I hated when cars do that. They…”
3. mentioned topics that you think you both have interest: Talk about topics that you like and if the other looks excited, then keep it going. don’t talk about stuff if you don’t think the other is going to like.
4. getting other people excited about the conversation: don’t ask yes-no questions. instead, ask “why” question to get someone talking about what they value.
Ex: where do you live? Why do you live there?
Ex: what do you do for work? Why did you decide to do that?
This way, you can hear what’s important to them and you can center the topic around that.
5. Ask questions that are fun to answer like what-ifs, if you, hypothetical, favorite, would you rather, personal stories,
6. create a connection with people while talking: allow yourself to laugh, but don’t think laugh. Laugh when you find something funny.
7. make the other feel heard by mirroring. it’s when you repeat the last few words that the other person said. Its a way to interrupt it without ignoring the other person.
I DON'T KNOW WHY THIS WAS IN MY RECOMMENDED BUT THIS ADVICE IS EXACTLY WHAT I NEED AFTER BEING ANTI-SOCIAL FOR A YEAR NOW. THANK YOU!!!
There was a time in 2020 that for around 8 months I only socialized with the food delivery guy and I once forgot how to talk to them
So just talk about things you’re interested in, be curious, and be genuine.
if you can, try to be interested in about anything. the more you know, the better
@@wormman1772 or just be genuinely uninterested in a lot of things.
@@ewngzedward6182 that works too
Pretending to be genuine works. I agree.
Running a podcast like his that's built this massive reputation ain't easy.
It's great to take this deep dive. Joe isn't winging all this
Maybe not , but siding with whack-job MAGA’s theory’s on Dem’s stitching up January 06 attack has scraped the barrel.
The reason I LOVE Joe as a Podcaster, is his conversations and interviews seems so authentic and they flow so naturally.
the bets way to connect with anyone is laugh genuinely
-watch something funny before going out
Watching this as a social person, I literally learned about things I do naturally but never knew why I was doing them.
whoa
Lol my partner is the same. He’s made so many friends + opportunities just being naturally himself (a confident socializer) I watch him flow effortlessly into conversations with random strangers so often. As someone who is social but not as outgoing, meaning I rarely strike up whole conversations with absolute strangers, usually just small talk that ends quickly. Sometimes there are people whoare just easy to click with but it surely takes a skillful flow to navigate convo with just anyone at anytime. Lucky you haha
Same Dude when i saw this Dale i was like ... he just said what i was thinking :D
Spot on. Was thinking the exact same thing. I do some of these things without even knowing I did them.
@@Fortheloveoforthodoxing I think that's like 99.9% upbringing. Whenever i was a kid and went out with my dad that's what he did, random jokes and conversations with ppl so now when i go out I do similar. Pretty sure your partner just had a(n) outgoing parent(s).
I was an already very outgoing , talkative and charismatic person. I was still a little awkward sometimes when meeting someone new. I recently have gotten my first job as a waiter. I have been doing this for about 6 months and I undoubtedly feel more confident (then I already was) talking to new people and being able to communicate in a nice polite way that makes people have an enjoyable energy when I am speaking with them. PARENTS 1000% recommend pushing something in service industry as a first job for kids like me to grow and become independent when communicating with people. I find myself when with my parents introduce me to new people I instantly make a good impression and leave a good thought of myself to them. Great for networking and building VALUABLE communication skills with people
its weird after youve been in a relationship for a long time you forget how to make small talk without being repetitive this is definitely going to help
this just makes me appreciate joe more. he does it so naturally.
Joe is making "small talk" with people that can be searched up online and see what talking points can be good so the conversations dont just halt.
When you meet someone for the first time you just have to figure it out.
Yeah imagine meeting someone for the first time and not knowing anything about them and then state "I love being around people like you" hahaha Fcking AWKWARD
i mean that guys beard was pretty easy to notice. you can also use that energy card slightly down the line after maybe you ask them a couple personal questions that would reveal some things about their character
The video literally explained how to do it with anybody
@@El1as-- make a vid of you doing it please. Show us that it works.
So just... figure it out.
Thank you for providing me the tools on how to make a conversation awkward for others and keep it that way.
😄
there's definitely some people that this can be applied to in reverse to counter overreaching liberties.
This is normal socializing . Just make sure you do active listening . People are all interesting and have a treasure chest experience . Just listening and respond appropriately
It's amazing how entertaining Joe can make a small talk with practically anyone of anyfield
"Hi how are you?"
"High, how are you?"
how high are you?
@@nightrider1996 Sober actually :/
@@nightrider1996 im sooo high, tolko da pišem na drugom jeziku
Why high are you?
Top punnery
I guess I have already learned this through a lifetime of experience.
Being yourself and not worrying about what others think makes conversation easy and genuine.
If you understand that you are speaking with another person created in God's image, with infinite value. And realize that their opinion really matters. Going through the entire conversation with love, gratitude and respect.
Then its always easy.
So the list is
1. Compliment with positive vibe. eg. on work, energy, platonic physical genuine compliment(beard, etc)
now to not to be overly complimenting
2. Transition between topics using “reminds me of” thinking. than to give any experience or any reminders to another stuff, than to other reminders in recurring. if you said "no", say why of no and get things to new topics.
3. Ping for topics of mutual interest. Immediate connections. deeper connections
4. Make people exited for stuffs ;-
a. where do live? why ?OR what you work ? why? deeper understandings.
not any interesting in conversations
b. Fun to answer questions = you had magic wand? you are king of the world? to the answers that are "no"
5. a. Laughs easily on other persons stuff... b. mirroring words = make them heard by last 3 words, and for rapport to take control of conversation. BUT dont be a copycat. Be Authentic true to yourself.
Such a good instructional vid.
Im a big fan of listening too. So many people start a subject then interject because they're really more desperate to tell you about their experience not actually hear yours .
Nobody listens anymore. Joe nails both aspects of conversing and listening. Love the guy.
We all know why we are here - we all hate small talks but feel the compelling need to learn them anyways in the most direct and step by step manner
I do not know why I am here. I suppose with all this "it's the "DUH-HUH Left" "it's the "DUH-HUH Left"" nonsense I was just looking to get a few things off my chest. Now I am her e I do not know what
I have to thank you for this video because I am an ESL teacher and a Russian student of mine is self conscious of her inability to small talk. I've been going over the basics but this is where I'll be going next 👍
A head injury solved all my previous social weirdness, literally felt like a new man.
Interesting videos bud. 👍👍
"How old are you?"
"I'm 25"
"Why are you 25"
"uhm..."
*fecc mission failed, we'll get 'em next time*
Where are you 25?
Why are you gae?
@@hashslinger2734 Who says I'm gae?
@@igorthelight u are gae
@@hashslinger2734 What shows that I'm gae?
I often find myself in a position where I’m tryna have some small talk but the other person makes it awkward and then I don’t know what to do so I become awkward
that sounds like perfect mirroring
I’ve met a couple of awkward ppl. They have one word answers and don’t really ask questions so its very difficult to have a back and forth convo. After a while I realise that’s just who they are, awkward rational geeky type who can’t do small talk but they’re actually comfortable not silence. Either you have to learn to get comfortable around them, or find other friends.
@@LiannaLovelle that , and the fact you are female
How’s the weather
Oh I hate that so much...it's like you're the only person who is talking or showing any interest. Or...maybe you don't know how to continue it, but yeah, that is super awkward.
When that happens just say "well it was nice to meet you" or something similar then leave.
I watched many of your videos, but I'm a new subscriber. I'm nearly 57 years old, and have always been/ felt a pariah. I have to admit, your observations and advice are eye-opening, even for someone my age. If only I'd had a resource like this when I was younger...
Always tell people you appreciate them, no matter how small the good they do for you.
Damn never thought about that.
If you have trouble holding eye contact, don't look in the eyes! Instead, look in between them. The other person won't notice the difference and you'll appear more confident
Thank you for getting me interested in self development btw!!
I don't think that's true. They might just think there's something on the bridge of their nose and feel self concious and awkward after. I mean, its pretty easy to recognize eye contact, same goes for the absence of it.
If u focus too much you’ll end going crosseyed
I learnt once to hold eye contact, but don't look all the time. Look away for a moment sometimes or blink. That way it's more comfortable for both of you
I'm gonna try with my friend
Joe laughs at everything because he’s high.
I laughed at that and I’m not even high.
@@lennon_richardson I laughed at that and I am high
@@wadecarefully I laughed at this thread and I am low
Maybe. But he also has a natural sense of humor. Joe's done standup, and standup is about finding humor in the mundane.
It doesnt work like that.
The most liberating moment of all is when you finally realise you don’t need to make small talk anymore, with anyone. Just smile and walk away.......
This is why you have no friends
@@prestonphillips3375 You don't need friends to be happy.
@@bhe8336 I do....don’t tell me how to live.
@@prestonphillips3375 Just shows how insecure you are.
@@bhe8336 Oh you dont like friends? You must be a sociopath. Stop assuming.
bonus tip,something i do is assume something i think is probably gonna be wrong about the person and then ask if i happen to be right or wrong. dont assume something thats overly offensive though,this convo starter gets them having to defend whats actually right about themselves and therefore get them more invested in the convo
Step one: immediately start telling somebody top ten most convincing conspiracy theories.
this is my only step
This would be a fun conversation
@@roberthay6422 lmaoo
Well everybody believes at least one cospiracy so...
then they run or think you are insane(or you have a friend for life)
Joe is like a Grandmaster of talking to people. He is so strategic and natural at the same time - it blows my mind.
Thank you so much for making this channel! I have honestly seen a HUGE improvement in my social life, confidence, and even self image! I finally feel like I can talk to anyone I want. I used to feel like I was socially awkward, but not anymore!!!
The reason why a study like this is good but then it won't help as much is because people would want to try this out but forget one thing: Joe means what he says when he says it. If your goal is to woo someone just to woo them and have them make small talk with you, compliment all you want, they'll sense something being off. Joe pulls it off because he's genuine. So I'd say be a fan of someone, learn about them and only approach or expect this to work if it's coming from you heart.
It’s kind of crazy how when I was a kid I use to be so terrible at talking in general, especially to women I was interested in. But as I grew older it just sort of came naturally and what I see in this video is exactly with a few more things I never new about. So I’m interested to see how much of an improvement my conversations are with this current girl I’ve just started talking to
It's practice. I bet you went out and failed at conversations a bunch, right? Then got better? I doubt any basement dweller got better by avoiding social interactions(like me :D).
Waitress: Enjoy your food!
Me: You too! 🤦🏻♂️
All the time 😂
Always when checking in bags at the airport: Counter: Have a nice flight. Me: Thanks. You too.
Cashier: Bye thanks.
Me: Have a good tonight.
Lool 😂
My boy Lenarr Young got stomped because he said you too after saying thank you 🤕
I work as a valet in a casino. And small talk is a big part of it. As someone who’s always been an introvert this has been a huge challenge for me
I really appreciate your videos. As someone with mild Asperger's its frustrating recognizing how awkward a conversation is and not having the means to fix it. I'm really, really thankful for this.
One of my go to ‘fun questions’ when talking to a sports fan goes along the lines of, “if you were the manager of x team what trades would you make?”
When I realized I dont want/need to small talk with everyone... "awkward silence" ceased to exist
Yeahhh this was a revelation for me too bro
Suave silence
I was thinking this the whole time while watching this video 🤯
Yes...i dont want and i dont need small talk wit everyone...
You know they’re charismatic when every video smoothly transitions into CU and reinforces why you should enroll 😉
I'm so glad this popped up in my feed. I have been making an effort to be more social, but i don't have great social skills. Obviously, it's not something you're born with; it's something you learn. Joe seems to have a genuine interest in others. That's the first thing i have to grind into my brain. People like it when you seem to genuinely care about them.
After watching this I realized that Ive naturally done all of these things my whole life and I’ve always been extremely good at small talk or connecting with anybody. Boosted my confidence a little bit haha Being a great conversationalist is a hard skill to acquire and make it seem natural.
@@cellardormant7488 thanks twinkie man!
"where were you born?"
"California"
"Why?"
'Cause I'm hella cool, That's why! 😎
Prepare for a depressing answer if you ask that
@@ericgol7 what state are you from?
Just ask questions. People love talking about themselves. Ask them if they have brothers and sisters. Where they are from. Etc. Also ask creative questions too, like "You are trapped on a deserted Island, what 3 books do you bring and why?"
I learned this through my job.
@@user-ms1ue8bd8r They do read. They read a lot in fact...... unfortunately its not books they read, but "Tweets" instead. 🤦♂️
I watched the bunch of these conversation videos tonight, and this one is by far the best of the bunch. He gives good clear examples to make his point.