First Date Sparks: Overrated or Necessary?
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- Опубликовано: 11 ноя 2021
- Are sparks on a first date necessary for a successful relationship to blossom? Or are they overrated? Watch this video to hear what I've learned.
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Do you need fireworks on a first date or just on New Years? 🎆
Are you kidding me? He wants "bells and whistles" on the first date? Well, that's pretty demanding don't you think? Fireworks no. Clinic papers with test results....yes.
That's the thing about dating: everyone comes in with different expectations. But I'm with you on the clinic papers... know your statuses, people!
@@Sco-Show I need longer videos from you
For me, all i need is a mere spark. if we share a curious glance - this will do it. or a kind lingering gesture - like strangers in a cafe and you handing me my drink or me passing you yours and its reciprocated with a gentle smile...these little moments can and will set me on fire. i may or may not be intense and if i am, know that i am very aware and am more considerate of strangers than to my own self. more often than not i get bruised by my own billowing firestorm. my journey has taught me restrain, but i cannot promise that you will not feel my frequency...with that said my journey has also brought me to a place of awareness. awareness of myself and others. if the feeling is not mutual i find comfort in knowing that these waves of emotions will wash over me and the tides will recedes and if fortune finds friendship with me then the horizon will bare a new dawn. i have found peace within the depths of my heart even when submerged under this crushing gravity. for through my surrender i have realized that i, and i alone, derive happiness from within yet a small external gesture from another human has the potential to spark a ripple of happiness from without. if your ever in hawaii look me up...here's to finding what you want and need on your journey.
Instant attraction is fleeting, love grows and deepens over time.
I Don't Necessarily Need Fireworks, But I Think I'd Need More Of A Conversational Connection First. After That The Fireworks Will Come....Maybe lol
I agree! I want my partner to also be my friend, feelings/fireworks can build the more you get to know someone. Writing someone off after one date because they didn't present EVERYTHING you're wanting can be self-defeating.
@@Sco-Show I Agree Totally. The First Date To Me Is The Preface, The Second Date Is The Context, And If There's A Third Date, Its The First Chapter.
This is really good advise for me since I haven't dated anyone, yet. Thanks
Glad you liked it, hope you have some good experiences!
There's chronological age and developmental age. Some people peak and stop growing and remain locked in an immature stage of emotional and mental development for life. Other people go on to travel learn new things, read, get formal education and become wiser from life experiences good and bad until the day they die. Many personal traits are hard wired into our brains. For example how a person deals with adversity is crucial. Some people become defiant and find a way through sacrifice and resourcefulness to make something out of nothing and overcome it while others succumb to fear or laziness and give up. Intelligence and temperament also play a role. Beware people with narcissistic personality disorder They are incredibly deceptive, parasitic and skilled at emotionally manipulating and using people to the point you will begin questioning your own sanity.
I'm of the belief that we all have the ability to change, we just have to choose to do so. Many people (including most of my family) are happy to stay as they are because familiarity & the status quo is comfortable. Change is scary, but you don't grow or know who you might be if you stay in the comfortable.
@@Sco-Show I have friends and family that are the same way but its not my nature. I also suggest you make an effort to associate with people of common interest. I've always been an aviation enthusiast and at one point after washing out of the USAF flight training program due to a minor eyesight impairment I began working on my private pilots license and joined the National Gay Pilots Association where I met my future husband. Two qualities I most admire about him are his intelligence and kindness. After a long courtship we got married in 2008.
I've had the very same experience that you described during "storytime". I think part of the problem is that some people really believe they have their own *advanced* testing method for "fireworks". And, at least for the guy on my date, he seemed to have a script and set of choreographed steps that he launched into and he gauged my eligibility for a future date based on my impromptu performance. Meanwhile, cut to me a few days later, trying to figure out why this guy asked me to his home and cuddled with me (G-rated cuddling!) if he didn't already feel there were at least some fireworks?! I was crushed!
I really don't know what/why some guys do/say what they do. I recently had a first date that I thought went well, ended with a short hug, and when I texted him asking him to go out again he said he didn't think there was any potential because we didn't kiss on the first date. 🤯 We need to come up with some kind of dating 101 course or something, I don't know where people are getting these ideas.
I mean if you get Nothing on the first date what makes you go on a second one? Great being optimistic but doesn't always apply when deciding if you want to make someone part of your personal life. There's zero compromising when it comes to that. You gotta know what you want and if you spent a whole date and didn't get it... why go on a second one. Just my opinion.
Sure, don't do anything you don't want to. I've just learned for myself that I may not find out what type of match I'd be with someone after only spending a few hours with them. My typical question to myself is "do I want to know more" about this person and if I do, I'll ask for a second date. I've had a few dates recently that weren't great or terrible, they were fine, so I asked for a second date to get more information and get to know more about them.