My husband passed 4 years ago..I'm still grieving. Feel S like 4 days ago..I'm missing my husband. beyond words. We been togethersince the age of 15 and he was17... we were married for 47 years...now I just can't stop thinking about our beautiful life together ❤❤.
Megan your points were spot on, soon they will put people on antidepressants for normal grief very dangerous. I don’t agree at all with this new diagnosis, people are all different and go at there own pace with grief, and life is very different after losing loved ones, doesn’t mean it should be put in a dms book, as a disorder, I myself have gone through lots of loss and it changes everything in your life, I lost my dad my mom, my stepdad, my brother in-law, and now another brother in-law who is battling cancer and might not make it. I also gone through my own diagnosis of diabetes nine years ago, and lots of stress, learning about this disease and grief of a life I had before the diagnosis, and how difficult it can be to live this life with diabetes everyday, and no one recognized or cared how my emotions came into play with this. I was put on antidepressants that I think to this day was unnecessary my doctor was not very understanding how scared I was, he told me “you shouldn’t be scared”. Well I was. And I cried in his office, my whole life was changed, and I was upset. Then he asked how my mood was and I said a bit down then he gave me a sample pack of antidepressants. It was human emotions that were medicated. And still on the damn things and very hard to get off of. Not many doctors are good with emotions, when mom died, I was telling him how much I missed my mom, and he said ongoing grief, well yes grief is ongoing there is no timeline, he just didn’t want to here it. I’ve been shut down on so many things that I have been going through it’s hard to find that one person who is willing to really listen, be sympathetic, be kind, be empathetic, be caring when your life feels like it’s crashing down around you, not even a grief councillor. My stepdad went twice to grief counselling through a church, and didn’t feel validated at all, he was so crushed after mom died, she was the everything to him his lifeline, his love of his life. And me to my mom was a very special person in my life, she was a single parent raised three kids worked a full time job as a nurse, and made time for us to took us to the lake, had wonderful Christmas’s, called us sweety , gave lots of hugs, just a beautiful wonderful mom. No wonder we take her loss so darn hard. And telling people to turn to God through your grief DOES NOT WORK, or pray, religion should NOT come into play with grief ever, you need people around to cry to, you need unconditional love, you need sympathy. I had none of this from people who I thought would be more understanding.I was truely alone because people are not conditioned to handle someone else who is sad. Like Megan said happiness is the only emotion people want to here or something like this she said. We were born with needs, a baby cries when they need something, food, sleep, diaper change ect, that’s the only way they can communicate, when your sad, you cry, you need something a hug , a listening ear, why would it be any different as an adult who is grieving, you need someone to hold you, crying is an emotion, your hurt in your heart when you lose someone you love. Give that person hugs, validate what there emotion is telling them. I hope this makes sense, you sure in the hell don’t need a diagnosis with grief. Just some TLC that’s my prescription for everyone who is grieving. As long as they need it could be a lifetime.
I lost my only son suddenly in a car accident a year ago he was only 20 years old -how the fck am I suppose to feel normal. The pain that I am going through is unbearable-I do Not want to be alive. I am so broken and looking forward to the day that I reunite with my boy 💔 forever 20 🕊
As a widow, and knowing several others, the definition is ridiculous. Agree with Megan’s comments. Grief is like shore waves, which come and go over the years…
I don't understand why it needs this diagnosis anyway, because it IS ptsd. And this so called social norm is ridiculous, as it's based on how people don't want to have to deal with a person grieving, and how soon they can work and be fun to be around again..
Grief is a very individual thing, not everyone goes through it the same, it depends on how close you were to the person and who it was, how there death happened, if the person died sudden, if it was a long illness, there’s so many factors to grief, it depends how many deaths you’ve experienced for me it’s been ongoing, it’s been hard to come up for air, also it depends what’s going on in your life when a loved one dies, if there was other stressors in your life when the person died which again as an example in my life I was diagnosed with diabetes a few years before my mom died which was another loss, loss of health, life changed over night, which is very difficult lifestyle to except, you really don’t know how a person is going to take losses till it happens to you, we live in a society where people don’t except pain emotional pain. Life with loss is hard enough and then you get the ones who think there’s something wrong with you if your not yourself. My mom passed six and half years ago, it’s getting better but there are triggers that take me back to when she died, like right now, we have a family member who’s in hospice, it has triggered memories of my mom being in hospice, and brings up emotions, and sadness for him to knowing he’s not going to live much longer, it’s like sitting on the edge of your seat knowing that day is close. It’s a very difficult thing to go through. And after my mom passed, it didn’t feel real at first then as it sinks in you cry, you feel down, you feel lost, then you cry, this goes on for months. In are family it’s been one after another. It’s a lot of stress on the body. When you lose multiple people in a row, three years in between each one it can be very hard. It’s not easy to get on with life. You grieve each death on your own terms. It ever goes away, you have anniversaries every year, and you feel it every year.
When your only son or daughter is killed tragically at a young age unexpectedly and suddenly and their death beings someone else’s fault then these individuals who make up these ridiculous theories and rules apparently they have not lost their only son or daughter!! Ridiculous for anyone to judge and comment on this matter if they haven’t lost a child of their own.
I sure wish they would talk about what “treatment” they are talking about! The Times article kind of skirted over it too. I have the impression that they mean Medical treatment, although Therapy is also hinted at. Why not be more specific???
My husband passed 4 years ago..I'm still grieving. Feel
S like 4 days ago..I'm missing my husband. beyond words. We been togethersince the age of 15 and he was17... we were married for 47 years...now I just can't stop thinking about our beautiful life together ❤❤.
Megan your points were spot on, soon they will put people on antidepressants for normal grief very dangerous. I don’t agree at all with this new diagnosis, people are all different and go at there own pace with grief, and life is very different after losing loved ones, doesn’t mean it should be put in a dms book, as a disorder, I myself have gone through lots of loss and it changes everything in your life, I lost my dad my mom, my stepdad, my brother in-law, and now another brother in-law who is battling cancer and might not make it. I also gone through my own diagnosis of diabetes nine years ago, and lots of stress, learning about this disease and grief of a life I had before the diagnosis, and how difficult it can be to live this life with diabetes everyday, and no one recognized or cared how my emotions came into play with this. I was put on antidepressants that I think to this day was unnecessary my doctor was not very understanding how scared I was, he told me “you shouldn’t be scared”. Well I was. And I cried in his office, my whole life was changed, and I was upset. Then he asked how my mood was and I said a bit down then he gave me a sample pack of antidepressants. It was human emotions that were medicated. And still on the damn things and very hard to get off of. Not many doctors are good with emotions, when mom died, I was telling him how much I missed my mom, and he said ongoing grief, well yes grief is ongoing there is no timeline, he just didn’t want to here it. I’ve been shut down on so many things that I have been going through it’s hard to find that one person who is willing to really listen, be sympathetic, be kind, be empathetic, be caring when your life feels like it’s crashing down around you, not even a grief councillor. My stepdad went twice to grief counselling through a church, and didn’t feel validated at all, he was so crushed after mom died, she was the everything to him his lifeline, his love of his life. And me to my mom was a very special person in my life, she was a single parent raised three kids worked a full time job as a nurse, and made time for us to took us to the lake, had wonderful Christmas’s, called us sweety , gave lots of hugs, just a beautiful wonderful mom. No wonder we take her loss so darn hard. And telling people to turn to God through your grief DOES NOT WORK, or pray, religion should NOT come into play with grief ever, you need people around to cry to, you need unconditional love, you need sympathy. I had none of this from people who I thought would be more understanding.I was truely alone because people are not conditioned to handle someone else who is sad. Like Megan said happiness is the only emotion people want to here or something like this she said.
We were born with needs, a baby cries when they need something, food, sleep, diaper change ect, that’s the only way they can communicate, when your sad, you cry, you need something a hug , a listening ear, why would it be any different as an adult who is grieving, you need someone to hold you, crying is an emotion, your hurt in your heart when you lose someone you love. Give that person hugs, validate what there emotion is telling them. I hope this makes sense, you sure in the hell don’t need a diagnosis with grief. Just some TLC that’s my prescription for everyone who is grieving. As long as they need it could be a lifetime.
I lost my only son suddenly in a car accident a year ago he was only 20 years old -how the fck am I suppose to feel normal. The pain that I am going through is unbearable-I do Not want to be alive. I am so broken and looking forward to the day that I reunite with my boy 💔 forever 20 🕊
My first thought when I read the intro was... it's for insurance purposes.. about the $$$. Thanks Megan for being so grounded in your profession.
As a widow, and knowing several others, the definition is ridiculous. Agree with Megan’s comments. Grief is like shore waves, which come and go over the years…
We all grieve
We all do not have:
Diabetes
Hypertension
Heart Failure
(etcetera)
but yet, we are rarely acknowledged 💔
Ty, you are divine 💜
Good to hear this discussion on PGD! I also just bought your book 'It's okay that you are not okay.' Looking forward to getting into it.
I don't understand why it needs this diagnosis anyway, because it IS ptsd.
And this so called social norm is ridiculous, as it's based on how people don't want to have to deal with a person grieving, and how soon they can work and be fun to be around again..
I think we have to stop labeling everything because none of us are perfect. Grief is a very personal matter to experience.
Grief is a very individual thing, not everyone goes through it the same, it depends on how close you were to the person and who it was, how there death happened, if the person died sudden, if it was a long illness, there’s so many factors to grief, it depends how many deaths you’ve experienced for me it’s been ongoing, it’s been hard to come up for air, also it depends what’s going on in your life when a loved one dies, if there was other stressors in your life when the person died which again as an example in my life I was diagnosed with diabetes a few years before my mom died which was another loss, loss of health, life changed over night, which is very difficult lifestyle to except, you really don’t know how a person is going to take losses till it happens to you, we live in a society where people don’t except pain emotional pain. Life with loss is hard enough and then you get the ones who think there’s something wrong with you if your not yourself. My mom passed six and half years ago, it’s getting better but there are triggers that take me back to when she died, like right now, we have a family member who’s in hospice, it has triggered memories of my mom being in hospice, and brings up emotions, and sadness for him to knowing he’s not going to live much longer, it’s like sitting on the edge of your seat knowing that day is close. It’s a very difficult thing to go through. And after my mom passed, it didn’t feel real at first then as it sinks in you cry, you feel down, you feel lost, then you cry, this goes on for months. In are family it’s been one after another. It’s a lot of stress on the body. When you lose multiple people in a row, three years in between each one it can be very hard. It’s not easy to get on with life. You grieve each death on your own terms. It ever goes away, you have anniversaries every year, and you feel it every year.
When your only son or daughter is killed tragically at a young age unexpectedly and suddenly and their death beings someone else’s fault then these individuals who make up these ridiculous theories and rules apparently they have not lost their only son or daughter!! Ridiculous for anyone to judge and comment on this matter if they haven’t lost a child of their own.
I sure wish they would talk about what “treatment” they are talking about! The Times article kind of skirted over it too. I have the impression that they mean Medical treatment, although Therapy is also hinted at. Why not be more specific???
Is prolonged grief the same as being stuck in grief ?
What to do when his family has prevented 🎉from being with your 😢beloved husband while he was dying and at his death?
How dare them!!!