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I always hated when people described getting married as a prison sentence for life, like if that is how you feel especially before the marriage don't get married please.
Right like I have no intentions to get married , but I’ve always imagined that getting married with thr love of your life is supposed to be joyful? Like i don’t get three idea of being married with someone you grow to hate, there definitely needs to be more communication
True. I get it when it's just genuinely a joke or sarcasm but even then just keep it between friends. It's not a good idea to be spreading this kind of impression on a very large platform. That's how toxic relationships get mistaken as normal, or worse, glorified. Some people really have no sense of responsibility just because they can upload whatever they want.
I guess those jokes came from when people where forced into marriage / you couldn’t get away with being unmarried because people would look down on you. However, lots of people marry for love now but still use those jokes because…? Idk lol? Idk why you would joke about marrying someone you love.
I understand playful teasing but I think it's a thing to do between each other or in a small circle, cautiously. I wouldn't wanna watch people do this jokingly or not as well as question if there's truth to that.
I hate people that perpetuate the belief that hating your spouse is normal and healthy. You don’t have to love everything about your s/o, but if you just constantly go on about how much you hate them then that’s just not healthy at all. You should love those close to you, especially your s/o.
As a 20 y/o male who enjoys cooking and baking I find it super weird when I see people talking about how their husband's can't do house chores. Admittedly I hate doing landry and the dishes, but I do them anyways. like boi you gotta grow up and realize that you need to eat and need clean clothes as well. And then the guys are like "I hate my wife". Like why would you get married then?! As a guy who would like nothing more than to be in a relationship with someone who actually cares for me it is insufferable to see this culture normalized.
although I don't have the best understand, I see it as a "I hate my sibling" type thing where you actually do like your sibling a lot. or maybe they hate each other. it seems to be a type of relatable humour and I could definitely see the same types of jokes done with siblings.
@@zahikdturk6568 making jokes. Let them be, seems weird to take these jokes seriously. It really only matters when it’s about abuse. Maybe your expectations for adults is different but adults can tease and have fun too.
dude reminds me of my older male coworker the other day who has been married forever... he said to me 'if she handed me divorce papers tomorrow I'd say THANK GOD!' and I wanted to respond so badly 'ok then why don't you just divorce her?' I feel bad for his wife.
I remember my high school choir director once told us a story about him and his wife, and he was talking about how when the two of them got married, they included in their vows that they would never ever ever yell or lose their temper with one another. He said how they take a break when they get frustrated and come back when they're feeling better. He and his wife have one of the healthiest relationships I have ever seen. He's never reffered to her has a "ball and chain," he's never called his marriage a prison sentence, he truly loves his wife and his wife loves him. That's the type of relationship that people should strive for.
I'm so happy because this is exactly how my bf and I are! Even when we are mad at each other we take the time to communicate that and talk it out, and explain each others sides and understand each other. Neither of us have ever yelled at each other either, even when we wanted to yell. Yelling is easy, talking is hard. We choose to do the hard thing every time. Because that's what makes our relationship work.
The incredible world of marriage jokes. We got some classics like: - I hate my wife - My husband is useless - I will kill my mother in law - Goodbye Freedom
divorce can be heavily stigmatized depending on your region and cultural background but it's important to value your wellness first. there's no humor in a, broken, abusive, loveless, all-consuming marriage portraying the most sexist generalizations of men and women. if this is what your relationship looks like then you need to RUN. as far and as fast as humanly possible.
@@limmiedee7405 True.I hate to admit it, but my father is a jerk and I even asked my mom why isn't she divorcing him and her response was:"I'm too old for this.Plus, I don't want people to gossip about my divorce".Sometimes, people care more about what other people say that their wellbeing...
All marriage comedy is always either “My wife is annoying and materialistic lol” or “My husband does nothing and makes my life miserable” and there’s no in between
ive honestly never seen the wife hating on husband thing. The closest ive seen are wives joking abt how husbands are clueless when it comes to basic chores and cooking, but usually thats not accompanied by disdain for the husband
When I was dating with my now husband, we made clear that those jokes would never be acceptable in our relationship, we both agreed on it and we’ve kept it that way! We’re really happy and caring to each other 💕 there’s hope
That sounds like a lovely relationship. I'm glad you got to experience that and it's sad seeing all these people on social platforms trying to navigate a miserable relationship with miserable partners. How do you not know how to feed yourself?? Its baffling to me.
I grew up with a dad who was "helpless". He couldn't (read: wouldn't learn how) to boil water. I couldn't rely on him for anything. He forgot my birthday every year. He never got any of us Christmas presents. He barely spoke to me. Its exhausting having to learn to cook when youre only a child because the grown man in your house is "helpless". It isn't funny. It isn't quirky. It isn't fun.
There's a line between playfully teasing your spouse and being mean. They obviously crossed it, true it might just "be a joke" but why would anyone in a healthy relationship want to even say stuff like that about someone they love
No. It becomes mean if the it isn't a joke and is just a comment disguised as a joke. Guys, it's not that deep, they're just cringy jokes on TikTok, not signs of a future divorce.
Words can’t describe how much I hate the “quirky helpless husband” trope. “Haha! My husband can’t do basic adult skills, he’s so silly 🤪” like no that’s not ok
It's comical that on tiktok we all comment It's weaponized incompetence, that's not fair to her or their children and to get a divorce but these women are FIGHTING for their useless baby husbands. Very amusing, highly frustrating.
The weird dichotomy of "marriage is awful" jokes: -my husband does absolutely nothing and I'm overworked -my wife isn't always pretty, and she expects me you doing things when I don't want to It feels like one side is not as awful as the other side
yeah like i literally COULD NOT IMAGINE hating my partner/spouse? it's so weird that that genre of humor is so common. i have a partner and i would never even joke about hating them because they're the best most amazing and wonderful person in the entire world. and if you really didn't like your partner/spouse you could just like stop going out with them/get a divorce or something instead of just being a wanker about it on the internet? the whole "hating your spouse" thing is just one of those Straight People(tm) things i guess
I’ll never forget when I found out that when my dad was around 19 and his mom was dying of lupus, his whole family still had her cooking, cleaning, and essentially doing everything for them. They never helped her and she did everything until she died. I can never find these “ha ha my partner doesn’t consider me a human, isn’t their incompetence adorable? 🥺” videos funny.
someone I was talking to during my volunteering told me about one of her friends who died (I can’t remember what of but I think it may have been related to MS) because her family did the exact same thing to her. she would be in hospital for weeks and then come back just to exhaust herself with housework again, have to go back to hospital and so on. and it killed her. it was such a heartbreaking story
The amount of free labor and time that women provide to family life is absolutely unappreciated. It’s crazy when you really think about it. This explains why stay-at-home moms take pills so much. That life sounds exhausting.
My parents definitely hold up really toxic gender norms and they don’t even know it. My stepdad works and then goes on his phone. My mom works, does all the cleaning (when i’m not home), does all the cooking (when we don’t order in), and has a side business baking cheesecake. My sister and I had to do actual chores, my brother gets to sit on his ass and play video games. If he was rude to me or even physically attacked me, he was allowed to get away with it and I got in trouble for defending myself. When I brought this up years later, they tried to gaslight me.
The reason my grandparents had few friends: They didn't do this "Hate my husband/wife" shit. They stopped getting invited because when it came their time to whine they just... "Yeah, I love my wife", "My husband does so much for me and the kids".
Happy for your grandparents! :) Having a normal loving relationship sounds just like a breath of fresh air and more relaxing that these "bullshit husband/wife drama"
This trope is so upsetting to me, always has been. After my toxic relationship, I wound up in therapy for a long time because I believed this fate was inevitable - glad to report that's not true and my current boyfriend is amazing and supportive.
I’ve heard stories of women who stopped doing laundry and dishes that were left by their boyfriend!husband and their partner would either complain that the messes aren’t being cleaned or just leave because it’s “not working anymore.”
I know a "helpless husband" type at work and he carries that into the workplace as well. He can't operate the simple machines we use, is afraid to answer any calls that require him to make a decision, and even asks people to buy coffee and throw things away for him... and that's not an exaggeration. He absolutely infuriates me to no end.
My daughter and I saw a couple in Disneyworld while we were on vacation there. They had two young boys (probably 5 and 7-ish), a baby in a stroller, and a toddler, cute as a button girl that the mom was holding. As we waited in the Magic Kingdom for the end of evening fireworks, we watched as mom struggled with ALL FOUR KIDS while dad played on his phone. It was hot outside, and I imagine they'd had a fun (but long) day in the park! The toddler was squirmy, the two boys were shoving each other, the baby was whiny - ordinary kid stuff. Finally, mom says to dad, "CAN YOU HELP ME, PLEASE?!" He takes the toddler girl from her for .00000000000015 seconds and then hands her back and says, "SHE WANTS YOU." and goes back to playing on his phone. I DON'T GET IT. I just don't.
"Housewives have it so easy". They don't get it. They get to have days off of work. While their wife has to work even on vacation. I'm raised by a housewife, I witness everything she goes through. And it's exactly why I don't want to follow the same path she took.
what makes me mad is that these women encourage this behaviour. even if they know it's a joke, that's not how people are gonna think when they see these videos.
Yeah honestly, it's sad how this has been perpetuated in our culture. What's sad to me is that these girls agree to let their spouse make these rude insulting "jokes" which literally leave the woman the butt of the joke. I'm not really sure what the girl thinks she is gaining by participating in her man's "comedy" tiktoks. Honestly this "trend" made me never want to get married. Because it makes it seem like your just going to serve a life sentence with a bully who will find joy in your suffering.
As a girl, I don’t shave my legs or arms. Body hair is normal. And I’m not ashamed of it. If there’s one person Who has a lot of swagger it’s Tom Selleck. So I make it a point to grow out my mustache just like him.
It baffles me how 'I hate my wife', misogynistic, 'my husband is useless' (how quirky) humour is still so prevalent, especially on an app for teenagers
Both are bad but I seriously don’t think the “my husband is useless” joke is anywhere near the same level as the “I hate my wife” joke in terms of how bad it is. The “I hate my wife” is more often than not a product of misogyny whereas the “my husband is useless” is more often than not a reaction to misogyny. I wish people would stop treating them like they are the same
@@mj2208 Very well said! People also tend to forget (or conciously gloss over) the history and background of marriage. Even here "in the west", it's no longer than a few decades(!) since women no longer have to sign their rights away (or better said the rights tgat their father did hold over them) in order to get married. It stems from treating women as literal property; we couldn't open a bank account, couldn't buy or sell property, couldn't work or get medication without the permission of the husband (and many more things), as well as - of course - we couldn't get in politics nor vote to change anything about it... It stems (and in many facettes still is) from a system of systemic oppression and exploitation. That's patriarchy for ya!
learning the term "Weaponised incompetence" made me understand the whole stereotype about men being helpless- it's not about being stupid, they choose to rely on their wife as a form of control and laziness
@@erinc129 think anything remotely physical. All of a sudden these strong women can't lift 30 pounds. Also, think any of those chores that are traditionally done by men, like maintaining the family car (oil changes and brake jobs are not hard), or stuff like climbing on the roof to clean out the gutters. Women are clearly capable of this, and have been weaponizing incompetence in these areas for decades...you know relying on men as a form of control and laziness. All of these so-called independent, strong, women, can start pulling their weight. Literally.
I dated a guy once who was the epitome of the useless demanding husband trope. I complained to my mom and said I was thinking about breaking up with him and she said "sometimes you find a good man and you just have to raise him into the husband you want him to be. Your first year of marriage will be tough but I think after that he'll be a really good husband"
Hate that! I'm so sorry you had to hear that. "First year of marriage will be tough while you train him", just no. Our first year was wonderful because we went into it being partners. I know women who make excuses for their husbands not doing their share, and then posting about how lucky they are when he finally does the dishes, or buys her flowers. Like, okay he did the bare minimum, why are we applauding? You don't raise a man to be your husband, you find a person to be your partner.
I want marriage tiktoks where you record your spouse being happy and smiling and enjoying the things they love without telling them. And then asking later for their permission before you upload it. To show people what a healthy marriage looks like.
I want to add to this, many kids would end up seeing this on their FY page, or just accidentally come across it and it normalizes that abusive relationships are okay. :/
Bobs burgers is good! Animation is a little funky, but it's the only sitcom I like because bob doesn't hate his wife and kids, and Linda loves her husband and kids
@@Akalim Yeah, and they have a realistic relationship. They have ups and downs like every couple, but you know they love each other. These couples should take notes lol
Which is even more hilarious because Addams was made as a way to parody sitcom tropes, and sitcom tropes were initially made as a way to create sorta of "relatable humour" during the time it was popular. In other words, The Addams family to a certain degree is one of the most ironically functional families because they're made to be the opposite of the norm during the time it was created.
Same applies to pretty much every gender so a lady married a lady and she refuses to do household chores or a man married a nb person and they refuse to do household chores leave them and make them do it by themselves
While you’re at it, teach him to properly wipe is buttcheeks to pristine condition. Teach him? What are you his mommy? Why can’t he learn on his own? Is he a child? Maybe I’m just not interested in raising grown adults. Not only are you doing all the labor around the house but now you get to do more emotional labor teaching basic skills. Yay a two for one special. If men wanted to learn how to do something, they would learn how to do it. Just as they do with any hobby and skills they have.
You aren't obligated to teach them either for the record, you can help if you want to but it's not something you HAVE to do. Adults are capable of teaching themselves how to do basic chores, and the internet exists
Fr the reason im quite afraid of marriage is because i worry about my husband being lazy and would want me to do everything all the time even when im ill. Also im worried that he would insult my cooking and everything i put effort into since i know that my grandfather and father are lazy and only criticize women all day I hope i will find someone who will help me around the house and appreciate me in this twisted world and not be a big baby about everything. My discouraging granny and mom through all my childhood dont help either with their "you won't find a man like that, all are lazy and toxic" so i quite lost hope
It really is a strange phenomenon. They're the ones who abandoned tradition and went off to find their "soul mate" only to find out oh hey there's a reason people did things they did for thousands of years without change. Oh who am I kidding, they never realize anything the lead poisoned fools that they are. Death to all people 55+
These aren't boomers. These are millennials. It seems "boomer" is anyone over 30 to a lot of you. Boomers are in their 50's or older and in nursing homes. Or dead.
@@akiraholland457 Actually, Baby Boomers divorce at a much higher rate than any other generation. Millennials and Gen Xers, on the other hand, have actually been credited for falling divorce rates(at least to my knowledge, that is).
@@akiraholland457 nah, younger people don't rush into marriage so it's more likely that they're already fully committed by the time they get married. as opposed to boomers who rush into marriage because of societal expectations to get married ASAP in the relationship so as not to have the dreaded and shameful "premarital sex" dun dun dunnnn
As someone who grew up with parents in an abusive relationship, it's weird to see couples jokingly abuse each other. I guess to some people who haven't experienced it seems funny to them? Like nothing is funny about your spouse tracking you.
I agree. It's so weird to see people...somewhat romanticize and display all of this behavior to impressionable kids that will grow up thinking these relationships are all they will be able to get. My parents should not have been married and they had children to fix their own marriage. There's nothing good about displaying this behavior as a joke to kids who don't know any better.
Yeah, this type of content unearthed a massive load of trauma pertaining to my parents and their past and present relationships. Like when you know something is wrong generally, but you forget you saw it in your home growing up.
These are just internalized “truths” for people who don’t know their issue is communication. Like, household chore division should have been worked out before the marriage, and if your partner couldn’t pull their weight you work it out or break up. Petty digs and insults are the easy way out for people who can’t verbally work through a disagreement. Learn deescalation and how to communicate, compromise, and tackle life together as a team.
literally had an argument with my partner yesterday because we both failed to communicate and hurt eachother's feelings. But we both de-escelated the conflict and sought understanding and resolution and now we're fine. I could never understand just holding onto that one moment for a whole relationship.
You can't just work out things before your marriage like a set it and forget it situation. Life constantly changes and people learn, grow, and their energy ebbs and flows. Couples need to communicate in an ongoing way about how to manage the important parts of life like meals, home maintenance, laundry, and money. Source: I have been married for 16 years.
my fiancé and i literally talked about which chores we enjoy and don't mind doing (especially w our respective sensory issues) before he even proposed. if one of us does something that bothers the other, we talk about it as soon as we can. it's honestly not that difficult. figuring out how to verbalize my thoughts in a way that makes sense is the hardest part for me, but i think that's because i'm probably autistic.
it's even more terrifying to see this in real life. My best friend moved together with her boyfriend, and he almost threw a tantrum like a child for being asked to do the laundry (For a solid 3 minutes before she agreed). She does most things in the household because "he just doesn't like it and isn't good at it" ?!? while working a ton. Like, good luck with that for the rest of your life.... Those types of men are not hopeless, they're freaking useless.
Parents really should be teaching their boys to do household chores when they're little, since it's way harder to get them to do it when they're older. As a man, I can tell you that it was way easier to get used to a 9 to 5 job than it is getting used to spend even an hour cleaning the house. It's something about knowing you're gonna get paid that makes it easier to force yourself through something than it is when it's unpaid. It took months of me actively trying to do it in order to rewire my brain to make it easier. The only reason women seemingly have an easier time of doing it is because they're socially conditioned to since childhood. PS. I'm not saying that we shouldn't try to encourage grown men either, I'm just saying it's way harder and as you've heard they're going to behave like man-children and throw tantrums. In cases when it's impossible to make them do it, women shouldn't have to put up with it and leave them, because at that pint that isn't just a person who is socially conditioned not to do chores, but an asshole.
@@bratprica6383 I absolutely agree. I'm a young woman but growing up my parents didn't teach me much in terms of house chores. Whenever I tried to help them or asked them tot each me they always just told me to leave these stupid things to them because I have studying to do. Naturally, when I got older my dad still wouldn't let me do stuff, because he did it faster/better, while my mom was suddenly shocked that I don't know how to do xyz without proper instructions because how could I not know. She seemed to think that if you are female and of adult age, lightning strikes you in the head and you suddenly know how to do chores properly, because how could you possibly not know. I'm not saying I'm not grateful to them or that I wish I'd been forced to do chores instead of studying, but I wish I'd had more practice and was taught properly, not with condescending remarks. Now, everything seems like it's too much and/or too hard and I also feel useless for not being very good at it.
@@Marina_7 I absolutely feel the last part and I encourage you to realize it's normal, not just for house chores, but for any new skill someone picks up, especially when they've been discouraged from learning it. I advise you to just push through those doubts it like I did, you'll thank yourself later.
I have seen my uncle get grumpy and go home because he didn't get an extra egg. There was only enough for everyone 💀. Because of such experiences, immature guys are my biggest turn offs.
My partner was super helpless until I got a chronic illness. Guess what? He learned to cook healthy food and discovered he liked it! He also got better at folding laundry and remembering to clean the bathroom sometimes when I couldn't get out of bed. Now that it's partially in remission, our division of labor is much easier since we can both do everything to about the same skill level!
In my early 30s some guy arrived at a trivia group and immediately started talking about his wife being a “ball and chain”. All the women in the group immediately gave him a horrified look and I think he expected us to laugh. Not sure. He was a drag the whole time and not good at trivia. At least his wife got a break from him. But man, no one else should have to spend time with him.
Also, most of the group was single people who would love to have a living partner. Why do people who have it take it for granted? It seems that immature people are married. Maybe they should get tax breaks. That never made sense to me.
@@JDMimeTHEFIRST it’s always easier to see the dumb people who are married, mostly because the dumb people are the people who yell. There is a large amount of people who get married and are happy, loving, and loved
Can we normalize healthy married couples in loving marriages? Catana Comics are a good representation of what long term couples should be, not these weird “mY wIFe IS a NaGgIng wHoRE” jokes. Like relationships are PARTNER ships, not a one way thing
"I hate my wife, she's ugly, stupid and can't cook!", "My husband is so silly, he can't even make tea without burning the house to the ground, haha!", "Getting married is like getting sentenced to life without parole!" and then "Why don't people want to get married these days? Why do they hate families so much? What's wrong with them?"
After watching these it makes me want to call my parents and thank them for showing me what a normal loving marriage looked like where everyone shared responsibility’s.
My parents got divorced in 1997 (when I was nine). So love _for themselves_ wasn't even needed. What they *did* have in massive quantities was/is love for *us:* their kids. However, they actively co-parent: because they're still involved as grandparents to my son. They were/are very active as parents in our lives (mine, my two brothers and my half-sister on my mom's side... who also became a surrogate daughter to my dad's side of the family). They made sure we all learned all chores equally. Which means, my brothers *DO* cook, clean (my younger brother makes *THE BEST yellow rice ever while the youngest one is THE BRUNCH KING* ) *and do laundry.* I taught my son to do laundry. Since he's developing rather early, I ain't touching his ji--zz soiled undies no more: so that's his problem now 😁. He's going to be ten in October, yet he's taller than a lot of grown women already: he's 5'1"/1.55m.
I've never found the 'bitter old marriage couple' trope funny. Like, if you're miserable, get a divorce? Also loving the hair! 💜 Edit: Because a lot of people are commenting I want to expand my comment because it's very simply worded. When I say 'just get a divorce' I'm talking about the situation where the man continually bullies/abuses(?) his wife simply because he can. He's not staying with her because of outside pressure to stay married or anything, he simply thinks that treating his wife terribly is okay. When it comes to situations when they mutually want to divorce but can't afford it or want to stay because of their kids, that's another topic. When both parties can afford divorce and the wife is staying in this abusive relationship, I am by no means blaming her, or the victim of martial abuse in general. I hope I phrase this much better, text on a a screen sounds really cold and distant. Please know I'm not trying to victim blame or shame anyone for being in an abusive marriage. I'm shaming the man(or abuser in general) for being able to divorce his wife but actively choosing not too because he finds it "funny" to harm his wife.
Yeah I agree with ya But I think they found it funny in the sense that their glad their not in that relationship Or they can relate to it? Yeah Honestly I don’t know 🤷♀️ I don’t know what’s funny about being miserable I don’t like human beings anyways
I hate it that in my homeland, people believe that it is a wife’s role to ensure that the marriage is not miserable, and if the husband doesn’t love her anymore, then it’s her own fault for not being able to ‘save’ her family. :( According to them, love is about suffering, I guess. But not in a bittersweet romantic way like in fiction.
unless its an arranged marriage, i can't see why you'd marry someone you hate. like sure, i guess the love could "fade" a bit over time, but if they really hate eachother why are they together???
We have a lot of bachelor parties at my work and Ive had quite a men making "this is my last moment of freedom before im tied down to that ball and chain" jokes to me and ive always asked them why they feel the need to insult their fiance to a stranger.
the real wholesome "couple comedy" was Jenna Marbles' videos. Clearly very exasperated by her tornado boyfriend but still obviously in love and having a good time
As a married woman in a healthy and respectful relationship. These tik toks trigger my fight of flight reflexes, Is this what “owning the libs “ is? Making us cringe at toxic relationship pranks?
Literally! Like, why even look at women if you hate them so much, let alone marry them?! So happy my husband and I are setting the precedent of always staying in the honeymoon phase. Like, now a bunch of my friends and family try to emulate our relationship. It really starts at home.
I’m conservative (leaning) and I’ve never met someone who finds this kind of “humor” funny. I will readily admit that the basis for this type of “humor” is definitely a man problem though, regardless of political views. Jokes like the tiktoks we see here confuse the fuck out of me, why would even want to be with someone you don’t like, never mind married, NEVER MIND having kids. I love doing nice things for my wife, pulling my weight, I probably compliment her 5-6 times a day (not exaggerating) and I thank her each time she does something that benefits the both of us. For example, if she does the dishes, I’ll pretty much always say “thanks for doing the dishes my love, I appreciate it”. Obviously I do the dishes regularly as well, but my point is that I LOVE to make my wife feel valued, heard, respected, and confident. I also flirt with her constantly and try to live the notion of “you are dating your spouse for the rest of your life”. She’s an incredible woman and deserves to feel that way.
all those videos about pranking the wife, where he pretends to do something nice and then crush it always make me cry. like she always looks so happy and then gets made fun of on camera by her own husband
My wife saw a tiktok where a lady was like "babies are so exhausting but my husband won't help because he says he has nothing to contribute until its first birthday." She has been plagued by the thought of it ever since.
it's crazy that people like that exist but all we can control in this world is our own actions. it's just funny to me when people act like misogyny doesn't exist and these are strawman arguments when it's very prevalent
He's got hands. He can feed, rock, bathe, burp, bounce, change, play peekaboo he feels so moved. It's so demeaning to say men are incapable of these things
my dad is this exact way to my mom. the only good thing I've gotten out of it is that I know exactly what I DONT want in a partner. the whole helpless act shouldn't work for 40 whole years, but it does. never putting up with that.
I grew up in a home where my mother spent most of her time acting like my father’s servant. He fully embraced learned helplessness (EDIT: the correct term for this is ‘weaponized incompetence’!) to the point that, when my mom was pregnant and on bedrest, I had to show my father how to do laundry. He was so belligerent and it was such a hassle for me that I just handled the family laundry for the duration of my mom’s bedrest. I was 8. And of course he knew nothing about cooking, so whenever my mother was sick/away from home I was in charge of the menu, cooking, and cleanup. In households that embrace patriarchal Christianity, the wives get a terrible deal, no doubt. But oldest daughters have it pretty rough too.
I can't believe people do that to each other. Especially as Christians. Because that goes completely against what it says in the Bible. My parents are both Christans and my mum did most of the work at home. But my father build the house I grew up in, with his own hands, in his spare time. They both really lived to the idea that a man puts his wife and her needs above himself. And my mum always treated him equally in that, just as much. And so my brothers and sisters grew up learning more or less the same things, we could all do all the chores in the house and take care of our younger siblings.
@@HolandaChiquita I live in a rural part of the southern US. Religion is ubiquitous and it invades almost every facet of life here. It isn’t enough for someone to simply worship who they want in their own way so long as they aren’t hurting anyone, which fwiw I fully support the right to do! But that’s not enough for a lot of folks. They have to shove everyone else into it as well. And for a lot of folks the religion is just a Trojan horse for oppression and manipulation and control.
@@timferrell6253 I was raised in evangelical Christianity. That’s what I am personally familiar with, that’s what I am educated in, that’s what influences the politics and social atmosphere in my area, and therefore I limit my commentary to that. It would be deeply unfair and disingenuous for me to speak regarding a different religion that I don’t know. Beyond that, I’ve seen plenty of damage done in the name of the religion of my youth. There is much to speak out against right there, I don’t need to venture out to other religions to find something to be appalled by.
@@Beetlejam837 thats fair and I respect that. I just feel like bashing Christianity is as popular as hating on nickelback meanwhile Islam criticism is largely absent. Really just an observation, not trying to pose it as a fact or anything
Lemme fix that comparison to what it should be: It’s like deleting all your apps on your tablet because you found one that you never get bored of and makes you the happiest
Okay but really this kind of relationship is a genuine fear of mine. I’d literally rather be single my entire life than be stuck in a marriage with any guy who disrespects me like that as a ‘joke’. My parents had this kind of relationship. Mum does everything and gets shit on by a man-child who came home from his job of sitting in a chair all day to sitting on a couch all night complaining about dinner and having real no interest in his wife or kids. They eventually split up (which was beneficial to everyone, my Dad’s attitude and outlook changed when he had to learn how to do everything for himself) but as a woman I do my best to steer clear of these kinda guys. Good thing is, I think relationship and gender dynamics are changing a lot recently.
Just don't date guys like this? They're pretty easy to spot in the wild, and so are good guys. I met my husband in high school, he would do cute shit like give our girl friends chocolate if they were on their period, and was super respectful in general. He was always there for me, and was my best friend for years. And unlike 'nice guys' and 'white knights' he didn't expect ANYTHING back from any girl (or guy!) he was nice to, ever. Pure unconditional love. I know I'm lucky and all, but there are so many great guys out there. Guys you get to play games with and cuddle with and enjoy the sun with. Guys who are happiest in life when they get to share it with you. Funny thing is, I'd do anything for my husband, cook and clean if he'd want me to (he doesn't). If only these tiktokkers realized you can't have the 'doting wife' stereotype if you don't respect and support the fuck out of her always. It's a two way street, after all. Sorry, I just get defensive about men because so many of them screw it up for the others, and I feel like if we all dare to believe in them they could prove themselves. Rant over.
@@foxygrin genuinely so happy for you, you have what most people look for in their life. But honestly in my dating experience, some men who are interested in you will treat you well and be completely different to what they’re actually like. They’ll act compassionate and caring at first. Then once you’re in a relationship it’s a complete change and there are massive red flags. It’s really not that easy to spot sometimes. I’ve had an ex boyfriend like this and it shocked me because the relationship was so wonderful. We were even talking about getting engaged in the future and he was so friendly with my family. All was good. But after coming home from a family dinner one night, I overheard him talking to his friend on the phone complaining about the ‘shitty’ dinner my Mum had cooked us and how ‘poor’ my family was (my family aren’t poor, but they do live a quaint lifestyle and my mum tends to put all her value in experiences rather than buying lots of material products). It wasn’t just what he said either, it was the way he said it. Completely different person, cold and mean. It scared me so much that I broke up with him that night. I didn’t tell my family the real reason why because it would’ve hurt them a lot, but I feel like I dodged a massive bullet with that one. Maybe because you met your husband in high school, it was easier for you to see what kind of person he is really. I wish that were the case for me, but I still hold hope that I’ll find someone respectful and kind.
I’m so thankful my man doesn’t even joke about stuff like this. I feel like even if you’re “joking” it’s still perpetuating the stereotype that women should be doing everything to serve men. Especially on a platform with younger audiences who are going to learn that and think it’s okay or normal.
agreed. the way a person speaks is direct insight to the way they think. if they're humor consists of racist, sexist, and homophobic jokes... whether they openly express their bigotry or not, they have internalized that kind of messaging and will perpetuate it to some degree. and I'm not saying there's no room for dark humor, but it needs to come from a place of tact and understanding otherwise it's plainly offensive. and anyone who thinks humor can't be either of those things is part of the problem. very glad that you're dating someone who understands this and treats you with the equity you deserve as a human being.
My bf is so done with human life that he does not even recognize these type of jokes. :D One time, I tried to make a (clumsy) "haha, I'm just a stupid, old gf" joke and his reaction was "ehrm, what?" + blank face
the jokes are decades old and completely overdone anyways. ive heard these jokes from men who had those relationships, and men who actually shared responsibility, and they have just simply never been well crafted or witty in the slightest. they are just by principle, not funny.
If people only knew what it's like to be in a loving, healthy relationship. It does not have to be like this. Good people do exist, you don't have to settle.
@@missc2742 I always like to think that, If me and the next person think of ourselfs and do our best to be a good person, then there's more people out there also still trying to be good people as well, may be hard to find depending on the place, but not impossible, so don't lose hope ! I know you'll find your special someone someday !
Being a lesbian is also a thing haha. Not that there aren't good men out there but you could also try the other side if you swing that way. No wonder contards hate the LGBT so much. The women are taking "their" women.
Are… are people okay? I can confidently say that I am no longer scared of being along forever, because it would be so much better than being in a marriage like this
At first When I was 12-13 I was excited to get a girlfriend/boyfriend whatever it doesn’t matter But looking after my parents marriage and these tiktoks Actually I am better off single my whole life.
Sorry but most relationships are not worth it. When my ex was doing the „my girlfriend is an annoying bitch“ thing I left him and he didn’t understand why? …. Well
i wanna know how those women agree to do this stuff lol don't even wanna imagine a scenario where they come up with these ideas themselves. like, why would a modern, seemingly progressive woman act as her partner's slave for a few likes on a meaningless app?? what about "my husband hates me and doesn't acknowledge everything i do for him and he is also a control freak who will probably kill me if im out of line" is funny? we've been battling misogyny and sexism since centuries. for what? this??
because it's been normalized. it's been painted as "just a joke" and if anyone thinks it's stupid or toxic shows up , well their called "sensitive" or "humorless". and i don't these women are in anyway progressive .
When I got home yesterday, my parents where watching a movie. And there was an interesting scene. -Honey, I'm home -Hello, I made some food. Do you wanlt the onion sauce or do you want the tomato sauce? -I don't mind either. Whatever is easier. You must be tired from working all day at home -Hahaha, I relax at home NO woman would ever say that
so it's not okay to "expose" kids LGBTQIA+ relationships is indoctrination but teaching them to accept being in a toxic/potentially abusive heteronormative relationship is...fine?!?
I once called someone out for these kind of ugly, gross and disrespectful jokes that they were making about their girlfriend. My parents treat it as if I did something heroic and crazy to pull this guy aside and tell him he was an idiot. To me it was just necessary, and I was so annoyed and disgusted that I had to give him a piece of my mind at the time. Call people out. I was in a safe place surrounded by family and friends and I was comfortable doing it, and if you feel safe and that you could call someone out without danger to yourself, please do it. No one should be seen as a hero for calling out bad behaviour. It should be normal. Here’s the context: My brothers neighbour/friend was over for drinks one night while we were staying with my brother. The neighbour had a girlfriend, both of them had kids to different partners and were at least 40. The neighbour was making super misogynistic and gross jokes about his girlfriend while she was standing right next to him and later when she left to get something and when the other guy that was also making those kinds of jokes had left, I pulled him aside with my sister in law and told him how gross he was being. He was basically acting like she would never leave him so he could make any joke he wanted and then play it off with ‘but I love her’ and at first that was how he defended it too, that she /knows/ that he’s just joking, so it was fine. I asked him if he would like it if his daughters boyfriends spoke like that about them, and how inappropriate and gross and disrespectful it was to treat his girlfriend the way he was. After our discussion he sort of understood, and said he would apologise to her when he got home with her. I told him he should apologise in public since he made those jokes in public and she needs to know that he isn’t just sorry behind closed doors, but will admit he was wrong in front of his friends too. He did end up apologising with us around and also in private but he seemed to think it was just one thing he said that was bad but at least it was better than nothing.
I once was called out on smth similar (on a joke that my bf is too childish and immature and it makes me tired) and you know, it really put things is perspective and made me realize that, we were better off without each other.
I love this honestly but makes me mad that for most men to realize how gross they're being, you always gotta bring up like.. their daughters or moms or any women from their family to make them understand :/
Man, I would have been trashed on in my family for doing that. In fact, every time I DO, they have a problem with me. My extended family, anyway. I cut them all off recently after tolerating their emotional and mental abuse toward me for years.
I can't even bring myself to call someone who's actually being an insufferable jerk a "bitch," so referring to a loved one as such, let alone a spouse-even as a joke-is just unimaginable for me. I'd just feel like the biggest asshole. It's depressing to think that not only is the husband in this situation comfortable describing his wife that way, but the wife is used to it. On a more upbeat note, I can't believe you're already at a million subscribers, but I certainly think it's well-deserved. Congratulations.
right?? Honestly.. It seems like there's some underlying issues being projected. A very unhealthy marriage. Yet lowkey enough for neither spouse to do anything, honestly it's very sad - especially considering your husband/wife is supposed to be like, someone you deeply and wholeheartedly love- ;;
@@messiahofthefirst.3415 Nahhh its not "lowkey enough for neither spouse to do anything". Its more than enough to have a deep conversation which either ends in change of behavior+understanding or divorce. but the reason they dont, is because of societal normalisation and the need to fit into the standard of "If you're X years old you should be married with a wife and kids". This is not to say that the people involved dont have their fault in it. They definitely do, but I thought I should bring it up that as humans we're very flawed, and its not easy to run a family, so not everyone should be required to start one in the first place. Its definitely easy to respect and love someone you're close to tho, which these ppl are lacking in.
@@steel5101 Yeah thats what I generally mean. And I honestly suspect it's not as bad as the videos in real life, but, the reason there's the videos to begin with which, basically are enough said.
God I love Chad Chad… or whoever this girl is claiming to be “Chad Chad”. Her videos are always exactly what we need. The comedy juxtaposed with the absolute insanity of the things she covers is absolutely perfect. Also, I need that ‘Not Really’ neon sign 😂😂
As an aro person, I will forever remain confused as to why people marry people they hate, or stay with people they hate. I guess I could understand if it's better for finances or the children, but outside of that why even stay?
No... Straight couples normally do not hate each other. They for sure should not. Sadly it seems some do. And the divorce rate shows its not that easy to find an actual partner for life
As an ace person, I will forever bewildered by wanting your partner to always put on makeup or dress up when vibin or when people ask their partner to drastically alter their appearance
@@yoshikagekira864 The op didn't say or imply queer couples don't have problems, they're just wondering why does it seem like straight couples hate eachother. You brought up something that no one commented
After my parents divorced I visited my dad. I am the oldest daughter and was about 22 when I visited. My dad - didn't pick me up from the airport and got my sister to do it - immediately stopped doing dishes or picking up after himself in the house - stopped doing laundry - stopped feeding his dog - didn't buy groceries - never cooked. These were things he was fully capable of doing and had been doing on his own for a year. He just expected me to do all the chores as an adult guest in his home and just perform all these tasks without being asked or thanked. I haven't visited him since and don't think I will. He visited me in my new home country and expected me to entertain him, made me pay for his bus fare, and made me buy him illegal substances. I'm just done with male incompetence.
that's exactly what happens to me when i visit my brother. he stops feeding the cats, expects me to clean his entire apartment if my parents are also visiting from my home country, and overall just turns me into his servant. and he's shocked when i tell him that i don't want to visit him. AND he's getting married next month as if he's ready to take on the responsibility of marriage when his toilet looks like inside of a person's lungs who's been smoking for 30 years. i'm just done with him. best i can do is to respect myself enough to never settle down for anything less than a man who's willing to share these responsibilities. good luck to you as well, Veronica. i wish you lots and lots of patience and resiliance.
“Male incompetence” sounds more like “bad luck”. I’ve been doing my own laundry, dishes, cooking, etc since I was 12. And in every relationship I’ve been in, I was the one to clean up, pick up, organize, designated drive, etc. I had a single mom who never let any of that lazy “mommy do it for me” stuff fly which included everything from homework to buying my own greeting cards for family members. I had countless friends who’s mommies cleaned their clothes and did their homework and wiped their butt till they found a wife. I don’t feel bad for their wives today. Because if I could see that this person is lazy and entitled, their girlfriend can see it too. Women make a choice to marry these men and think they’ll always love to clean up after them, or maybe they’ll change his ways and train him. Except when they find out homie hasn’t washed his booty hole once in his life because he thought it was unecessary and feminine to do so, that’s how someone turns out when mom makes excuses for him. The fault lies with both partners.
@@BB-ed4om The fault lies with both partners but not equally. Yeah, you shouldn't marry someone like that, but also "you let me be so incompetent" is not an excuse.
i hate how people normalise or believe that hating your s/o is a healthy thing to do. its ok to joke about things but- joking and making a mockery out of your s/o is a whole different thing. and i never rlly understood the whole "lmao my wife sucks and i hate her sm !!!!😠😠" trope. like- no-one is forcing u to be with her lol you either hate her or love her. choose one man.
I don't understand it at all. Why marry someone you hate? I also hate when men act like they have somehow been forced into marriage by their wives, my brother in christ, were you not the one who asked her to marry you? I know this is slightly off topic but with that whole johnny depp thing, the fact that he was joking about murdering his girlfriend and having sex with her corpse and then AFTER that married her!! Like what? Why do people get married to people they fantasise about killing?
@@frances9975 i understand and agree 100% like- no-one is holding a gun to their head and telling the guys :"u better marry that woman" lol. and the johnny depp one i didnt know omg, thats- crazy. yeaah idk why people fantasy about something like that.
It's still pretty prevalent today, unfortunately. One day my husband and I were shopping for a new mattress, so we were just discussing what we liked or didn't like about the mattresses. The saleswoman commented on how well we got along. We both looked at each other like "what?... We're just talking like normal people." Like it was a novel concept to her that a married couple could pick out a mattress without yelling at each other.
Cis men: we are the pinnacle of functionality and intelligence Also cis men: I'm just a widdle baby who doesn't know how to do anything 🥺🥺🥺 now rear my children
thank you all so much for 1 million subscribers i still can't even believe it :')
ur channel has been doing so well im so so proud of u 🫶🏼
Thank YOU for filling my days with fine high quality cringe from the internet, Chad Chad!
A million is just a twinge of a billion congratulations and keep going
congrats cc!!!! you deserve so much more, i love your vids so much
You deserve it!!!
I always hated when people described getting married as a prison sentence for life, like if that is how you feel especially before the marriage don't get married please.
Right like I have no intentions to get married , but I’ve always imagined that getting married with thr love of your life is supposed to be joyful? Like i don’t get three idea of being married with someone you grow to hate, there definitely needs to be more communication
It’s not. Find someone that has the same messed up sense of humor as you because screwing with people is the best part! 🤣🤣🤣
True. I get it when it's just genuinely a joke or sarcasm but even then just keep it between friends.
It's not a good idea to be spreading this kind of impression on a very large platform. That's how toxic relationships get mistaken as normal, or worse, glorified. Some people really have no sense of responsibility just because they can upload whatever they want.
I guess those jokes came from when people where forced into marriage / you couldn’t get away with being unmarried because people would look down on you. However, lots of people marry for love now but still use those jokes because…? Idk lol? Idk why you would joke about marrying someone you love.
I understand playful teasing but I think it's a thing to do between each other or in a small circle, cautiously. I wouldn't wanna watch people do this jokingly or not as well as question if there's truth to that.
I hate people that perpetuate the belief that hating your spouse is normal and healthy. You don’t have to love everything about your s/o, but if you just constantly go on about how much you hate them then that’s just not healthy at all. You should love those close to you, especially your s/o.
And it’s also cringe
nice profile pic
So true girlie
it's still a leftover of old time traditions when married couples where expected to stay together for life pretty much no matter what
It's normal but it sure as hell ain't healthy.
As a 20 y/o male who enjoys cooking and baking I find it super weird when I see people talking about how their husband's can't do house chores.
Admittedly I hate doing landry and the dishes, but I do them anyways. like boi you gotta grow up and realize that you need to eat and need clean clothes as well.
And then the guys are like "I hate my wife". Like why would you get married then?! As a guy who would like nothing more than to be in a relationship with someone who actually cares for me it is insufferable to see this culture normalized.
although I don't have the best understand, I see it as a "I hate my sibling" type thing where you actually do like your sibling a lot. or maybe they hate each other. it seems to be a type of relatable humour and I could definitely see the same types of jokes done with siblings.
You are a straight up W my dude
@@Blockoumi yeah yeah... The only difference is that they're not f'ing siblings they're grown up adults with lifes
@@zahikdturk6568 making jokes.
Let them be, seems weird to take these jokes seriously.
It really only matters when it’s about abuse. Maybe your expectations for adults is different but adults can tease and have fun too.
dude reminds me of my older male coworker the other day who has been married forever... he said to me 'if she handed me divorce papers tomorrow I'd say THANK GOD!' and I wanted to respond so badly 'ok then why don't you just divorce her?' I feel bad for his wife.
I remember my high school choir director once told us a story about him and his wife, and he was talking about how when the two of them got married, they included in their vows that they would never ever ever yell or lose their temper with one another. He said how they take a break when they get frustrated and come back when they're feeling better. He and his wife have one of the healthiest relationships I have ever seen. He's never reffered to her has a "ball and chain," he's never called his marriage a prison sentence, he truly loves his wife and his wife loves him. That's the type of relationship that people should strive for.
Some teachers go beyond just teaching the material, they're a positive role model.
I'm so happy because this is exactly how my bf and I are! Even when we are mad at each other we take the time to communicate that and talk it out, and explain each others sides and understand each other. Neither of us have ever yelled at each other either, even when we wanted to yell. Yelling is easy, talking is hard. We choose to do the hard thing every time. Because that's what makes our relationship work.
The incredible world of marriage jokes. We got some classics like:
- I hate my wife
- My husband is useless
- I will kill my mother in law
- Goodbye Freedom
divorce can be heavily stigmatized depending on your region and cultural background but it's important to value your wellness first. there's no humor in a, broken, abusive, loveless, all-consuming marriage portraying the most sexist generalizations of men and women. if this is what your relationship looks like then you need to RUN. as far and as fast as humanly possible.
@@limmiedee7405 i wish my parents could read your comment. They really should have divorced 20 years ago.
why do I feel like all the people that say that are in the same family
@@limmiedee7405 True.I hate to admit it, but my father is a jerk and I even asked my mom why isn't she divorcing him and her response was:"I'm too old for this.Plus, I don't want people to gossip about my divorce".Sometimes, people care more about what other people say that their wellbeing...
Oh man, I will kill my mother in law is a CLASSIC
All marriage comedy is always either “My wife is annoying and materialistic lol” or “My husband does nothing and makes my life miserable” and there’s no in between
Yeah there definitely isn’t a whole another side of the wife joking about husband. This is just husband dunking on wife
ive honestly never seen the wife hating on husband thing. The closest ive seen are wives joking abt how husbands are clueless when it comes to basic chores and cooking, but usually thats not accompanied by disdain for the husband
the second one is not a joke though. it's legit.
@@botanicalitus4194 you've never seen it cuz it's not a thing lol there's no "wives hating husbands" trope in comedy.
@@falseeef my bad definitely joking about being stupid isn’t hurtful
When I was dating with my now husband, we made clear that those jokes would never be acceptable in our relationship, we both agreed on it and we’ve kept it that way! We’re really happy and caring to each other 💕 there’s hope
That sounds like a lovely relationship. I'm glad you got to experience that and it's sad seeing all these people on social platforms trying to navigate a miserable relationship with miserable partners. How do you not know how to feed yourself?? Its baffling to me.
They always turn ur back on u
Escape while u can
Thank you for the hope!
making rules that any jokes are unacceptable is wild to me.
@@BB-ed4om That's not what she said tho. I guess if you engaged with the actual comment you wouldn't have an argument.
I grew up with a dad who was "helpless". He couldn't (read: wouldn't learn how) to boil water. I couldn't rely on him for anything. He forgot my birthday every year. He never got any of us Christmas presents. He barely spoke to me. Its exhausting having to learn to cook when youre only a child because the grown man in your house is "helpless". It isn't funny. It isn't quirky. It isn't fun.
weaponized incompetence at it’s finest
How would someone not know how to boil water?
@@seamusmckeon9109 he probably just didn't want to and said "I don't know how" as an excuse
Did he at least put a roof over your head?
@@BB-ed4om Oh, congratulations to him for doing the bare minimum to not get kids taken away by Child Protective Services.
There's a line between playfully teasing your spouse and being mean. They obviously crossed it, true it might just "be a joke" but why would anyone in a healthy relationship want to even say stuff like that about someone they love
The part that crosses the line is how obvious they try to make that their spouse didn't find it funny at all.
Omg so true
For subs. Like a million...
No. It becomes mean if the it isn't a joke and is just a comment disguised as a joke. Guys, it's not that deep, they're just cringy jokes on TikTok, not signs of a future divorce.
Not only that but it's teaching their audience that it's ok to treat ur spouse like that
Words can’t describe how much I hate the “quirky helpless husband” trope. “Haha! My husband can’t do basic adult skills, he’s so silly 🤪” like no that’s not ok
Like these guys can’t even function as human beings without their wives ?! How is that « manly » lol.
They are like baby chicks, not adult men.
It's comical that on tiktok we all comment It's weaponized incompetence, that's not fair to her or their children and to get a divorce but these women are FIGHTING for their useless baby husbands. Very amusing, highly frustrating.
@@jellyjilli1004 issa joke…… you know like you watch the simpsons, family guy, modern family, South Park etc
@@robbiesilverwolf it's not... funny.
And normalize similar behavior in real life.
@@jellyjilli1004 all those successful shows beg to differ
"I'm just pretending to be in a controlling relationship" - A nice slap in the face for people who are actually in a controlling relationship 😩
you good?
The weird dichotomy of "marriage is awful" jokes:
-my husband does absolutely nothing and I'm overworked
-my wife isn't always pretty, and she expects me you doing things when I don't want to
It feels like one side is not as awful as the other side
"Dude, I think you're just lazy."
"Pfft, that's what a pussy whipped beta male would say."
I would agree as someone who has lived this dichotomy
@@Ephesians5-14you divorced him right?
@@theman5324 in the process now finally. It's a huge relief.
@@theman5324 absolutely
I’ve NEVER understood the whole “hating your spouse” thing. It’s like a bitter end to the “enemies to lovers” trope
It's backwards, it's lovers to enemies.
@@ghostlyhousehorrors enemies to lovers and back to enemies 😂
Enemies to lovers is only cute when they actually like each other in the end.
yeah like i literally COULD NOT IMAGINE hating my partner/spouse? it's so weird that that genre of humor is so common. i have a partner and i would never even joke about hating them because they're the best most amazing and wonderful person in the entire world. and if you really didn't like your partner/spouse you could just like stop going out with them/get a divorce or something instead of just being a wanker about it on the internet? the whole "hating your spouse" thing is just one of those Straight People(tm) things i guess
@@swimmyswim417 enemies to lover is only cute when they're not actually enemies.
I’ll never forget when I found out that when my dad was around 19 and his mom was dying of lupus, his whole family still had her cooking, cleaning, and essentially doing everything for them. They never helped her and she did everything until she died. I can never find these “ha ha my partner doesn’t consider me a human, isn’t their incompetence adorable? 🥺” videos funny.
That is so sad. RIP to your grandma
someone I was talking to during my volunteering told me about one of her friends who died (I can’t remember what of but I think it may have been related to MS) because her family did the exact same thing to her. she would be in hospital for weeks and then come back just to exhaust herself with housework again, have to go back to hospital and so on. and it killed her. it was such a heartbreaking story
this is so incredibly sad
Hooooly shit, I feel like if I was dying and had a family like that, I'd be taking them all with me.
The amount of free labor and time that women provide to family life is absolutely unappreciated. It’s crazy when you really think about it. This explains why stay-at-home moms take pills so much. That life sounds exhausting.
My parents definitely hold up really toxic gender norms and they don’t even know it. My stepdad works and then goes on his phone. My mom works, does all the cleaning (when i’m not home), does all the cooking (when we don’t order in), and has a side business baking cheesecake. My sister and I had to do actual chores, my brother gets to sit on his ass and play video games. If he was rude to me or even physically attacked me, he was allowed to get away with it and I got in trouble for defending myself. When I brought this up years later, they tried to gaslight me.
Women and men are both human beings and yet one gender is just arbitrarily the slave gender.
Tf is wrong with people 😭😭😭 i hope you have a better life now and a partner who isn't an asshole or just lazy
holy crap same.
"That's an oxymoron. Emphasis on moron" ~ Chad Chad
Absolute best line here
I get way too excited when I see a man on tv actually loving his wife and children, without making the jokes💀
Brooklyn 99!
Lazlo and Nadja are peak
Gomez Addams
@@slightlyexpiredyoghurt Gomez Addams is #1 husband goals, 100%
@@starrshot2059 I want a guy that will treat me like his Morticia.
I’ve grudgingly come to accept that Chad Chad’s hair has more personality than my entire being.
literally my goal in life is to pull off as many hairstyles as she does because queen behaviour from chad chad
I want to say it gives Ramona Flowers without being insulting
Wigs definitely have to be involved and I mean that in a good way
@@EveningEJ I'm talking about all her videos not this one. This one is real.
Oh my, I was contemplating the boring nature of my personality and this comment perfectly sums it up. :D
The reason my grandparents had few friends: They didn't do this "Hate my husband/wife" shit. They stopped getting invited because when it came their time to whine they just... "Yeah, I love my wife", "My husband does so much for me and the kids".
Happy for your grandparents! :)
Having a normal loving relationship sounds just like a breath of fresh air and more relaxing that these "bullshit husband/wife drama"
Men will act like marriage is such a prison for them without realizing that for all of human history, marriage was basically purchasing a woman.
"I hate my wife"
*MY BROTHER IN CHRIST, YOU MARRIED HER*
I read this in Matt Rose's voice???
@@RhodeCasawayHELP ???
@@S1LLYTH1NG5 I've been watching Matt Rose at five in the morning to much
@@S1LLYTH1NG5RANPO PFP SPOTTEDDDD
+MATT ROSE MENTIONED?!/!/
@@izzylikestuff_ I LOVE RANPOOOO 🙏🙏😭😭 ... + MATT ROSE
I work in a jewellery store and I constantly have to awkwardly laugh off "I hate my spouse" jokes that are just so
a w k w a r d
I’d tell the ones joking to buy the jewelry for me instead if they hate their spouse so much 😇
@@tessarae9127 ngl thats pretty smooth
If you hate your spouse then why are you buying them jewelry?? 😕
thank god im not american
Oh no I've heard jewelry customers are one of the worst!
straight people: every day i wake up next to my BALL AND CHAIN 😂😂😂😂
lesbians: Every day I awaken and compose a new 10 hour symphony about my beloved
I was gonna say something but I realized this is actually true 💀
gay guys: i post a picture of myself every day on my Instagram. he hasn't texted me back in a month but we're married in my head.
what fanfiction taught you about lesbian relationships lol
@@darkwowplayer it’s called being a lesbian in a 3 year relationship!
i know like lesbians got it figured out, why would you marry someone if you’re not completely in love and want to stay with them forever
This is the kind of "humour" my abusive ex would approve of. He was a pro at weaponized incompetence, mental abuse, and stealing my money.
i'm so sorry. i hope you're in a better situation these days
Suddenly being a “cat lady” doesn’t seem so bad
never understood why it’s considered a bad thing in the first place, cats >>>> unstable and probably abusive marriage that happened way too soon
cats >>>> men and having kids
not at all
yes lets go
Men be like: ugh women are demanding the same effort in a relationship as they put in nowaday!?They are even more high maintenance!
This trope is so upsetting to me, always has been. After my toxic relationship, I wound up in therapy for a long time because I believed this fate was inevitable - glad to report that's not true and my current boyfriend is amazing and supportive.
🤠 glad to hear
Glad you found the type of love you deserve!
Congrats on your growth and finding a healthy relationship!!
I’m just not gonna risk it. Rather stay single than adopt a grown ass man.
im happy for you
I’ve heard stories of women who stopped doing laundry and dishes that were left by their boyfriend!husband and their partner would either complain that the messes aren’t being cleaned or just leave because it’s “not working anymore.”
I know a "helpless husband" type at work and he carries that into the workplace as well. He can't operate the simple machines we use, is afraid to answer any calls that require him to make a decision, and even asks people to buy coffee and throw things away for him... and that's not an exaggeration. He absolutely infuriates me to no end.
My daughter and I saw a couple in Disneyworld while we were on vacation there. They had two young boys (probably 5 and 7-ish), a baby in a stroller, and a toddler, cute as a button girl that the mom was holding. As we waited in the Magic Kingdom for the end of evening fireworks, we watched as mom struggled with ALL FOUR KIDS while dad played on his phone. It was hot outside, and I imagine they'd had a fun (but long) day in the park! The toddler was squirmy, the two boys were shoving each other, the baby was whiny - ordinary kid stuff. Finally, mom says to dad, "CAN YOU HELP ME, PLEASE?!" He takes the toddler girl from her for .00000000000015 seconds and then hands her back and says, "SHE WANTS YOU." and goes back to playing on his phone.
I DON'T GET IT. I just don't.
the husband sounds like a hormonal, entilted preteen rather than a grown man.
"SHE WANTS YOU" yeah cause she probably don't even know who tf you are bro. Lol.
@@GH23d7sL45 thing is, you shouldn't have to
@@GH23d7sL45 parentification. And usually falls on the oldest girls’ shoulders smh
"Housewives have it so easy".
They don't get it. They get to have days off of work. While their wife has to work even on vacation.
I'm raised by a housewife, I witness everything she goes through. And it's exactly why I don't want to follow the same path she took.
I can't believe the "I hate my wife" bit is still so prevalent and is now on other platforms besides work place break rooms. A universal constant.
well to be fair it's also been on tv for a loooooong time
what makes me mad is that these women encourage this behaviour. even if they know it's a joke, that's not how people are gonna think when they see these videos.
Yeah here i was thinking we left this with the Boomers.
Especially because their wife probably does like 99% of the house work.
Yeah honestly, it's sad how this has been perpetuated in our culture. What's sad to me is that these girls agree to let their spouse make these rude insulting "jokes" which literally leave the woman the butt of the joke. I'm not really sure what the girl thinks she is gaining by participating in her man's "comedy" tiktoks. Honestly this "trend" made me never want to get married. Because it makes it seem like your just going to serve a life sentence with a bully who will find joy in your suffering.
It's so sneaky how the patriarchy managed to gaslight women into believing men can't do simple things and to do them for them.
As a girl, I don’t shave my legs or arms. Body hair is normal. And I’m not ashamed of it. If there’s one person Who has a lot of swagger it’s Tom Selleck. So I make it a point to grow out my mustache just like him.
aww man i want a mustache :-,) /j (kinda)
I shave the lower half of my legs because the hair gets twisted an pulls in my socks.
The drag queen Geneva Karr is known for styling her leg hair into patterns, it's pretty cool
It baffles me how 'I hate my wife', misogynistic, 'my husband is useless' (how quirky) humour is still so prevalent, especially on an app for teenagers
Misogyny has and always will be prevalent unfortunately
It's mainly because in 2020 a lot of Facebook moms moved to TikTok due to the pandemic
@@barnaby4232 based
Both are bad but I seriously don’t think the “my husband is useless” joke is anywhere near the same level as the “I hate my wife” joke in terms of how bad it is. The “I hate my wife” is more often than not a product of misogyny whereas the “my husband is useless” is more often than not a reaction to misogyny. I wish people would stop treating them like they are the same
@@mj2208 Very well said!
People also tend to forget (or conciously gloss over) the history and background of marriage.
Even here "in the west", it's no longer than a few decades(!) since women no longer have to sign their rights away (or better said the rights tgat their father did hold over them) in order to get married.
It stems from treating women as literal property; we couldn't open a bank account, couldn't buy or sell property, couldn't work or get medication without the permission of the husband (and many more things), as well as - of course - we couldn't get in politics nor vote to change anything about it...
It stems (and in many facettes still is) from a system of systemic oppression and exploitation. That's patriarchy for ya!
learning the term "Weaponised incompetence" made me understand the whole stereotype about men being helpless- it's not about being stupid, they choose to rely on their wife as a form of control and laziness
women gave men the blueprint for this
@@markprice5651 ? how do women fake incompetence in the domestic sphere ?
@@erinc129 think anything remotely physical. All of a sudden these strong women can't lift 30 pounds. Also, think any of those chores that are traditionally done by men, like maintaining the family car (oil changes and brake jobs are not hard), or stuff like climbing on the roof to clean out the gutters. Women are clearly capable of this, and have been weaponizing incompetence in these areas for decades...you know relying on men as a form of control and laziness.
All of these so-called independent, strong, women, can start pulling their weight. Literally.
@@markprice5651 ever heard of something called the patriarchy? what are you on about?
@@unitnumbera1 I have heard of it,,,but I have also heard of unicorns, mermaids, and big foot and none of those things exist either.
I dated a guy once who was the epitome of the useless demanding husband trope. I complained to my mom and said I was thinking about breaking up with him and she said "sometimes you find a good man and you just have to raise him into the husband you want him to be. Your first year of marriage will be tough but I think after that he'll be a really good husband"
Hate that! I'm so sorry you had to hear that. "First year of marriage will be tough while you train him", just no. Our first year was wonderful because we went into it being partners. I know women who make excuses for their husbands not doing their share, and then posting about how lucky they are when he finally does the dishes, or buys her flowers. Like, okay he did the bare minimum, why are we applauding? You don't raise a man to be your husband, you find a person to be your partner.
I thought we were expected to marry husbands and wives, not sons and daughters...
wtf
Your mom has the "I can fix him" mentality and the answer is NO. No you can not.
Finally an intelligent person. You can see these things when you date a useless. If you stick around and make excuses for him, you’ll marry a useless.
I want marriage tiktoks where you record your spouse being happy and smiling and enjoying the things they love without telling them. And then asking later for their permission before you upload it. To show people what a healthy marriage looks like.
Oh that exists, but the comments are full of people wishing death on them
@@ursidae97 hate tiktok for that
@@ursidae97 damnn, people can be so miserable when it comes to seeing other people are happy
Even if they're fake, making scripted tik toks about abusive relationships is fucked up
I want to add to this, many kids would end up seeing this on their FY page, or just accidentally come across it and it normalizes that abusive relationships are okay. :/
@@carmenmacias1394 exactly
I feel like the addams family is the only family comedy without the ‘i hate my wife’ trope
Bob's burgers is good. They genuinely like each other and do equal shares of the work
and it's funny because in that show they were subverting the regular sitcom tropes...which is sad...
Bobs burgers is good! Animation is a little funky, but it's the only sitcom I like because bob doesn't hate his wife and kids, and Linda loves her husband and kids
@@Akalim Yeah, and they have a realistic relationship. They have ups and downs like every couple, but you know they love each other. These couples should take notes lol
Which is even more hilarious because Addams was made as a way to parody sitcom tropes, and sitcom tropes were initially made as a way to create sorta of "relatable humour" during the time it was popular.
In other words, The Addams family to a certain degree is one of the most ironically functional families because they're made to be the opposite of the norm during the time it was created.
Ladies if your man cant do basic household chores teach him and if he still refuses to do them then leave him
Same applies to pretty much every gender so a lady married a lady and she refuses to do household chores or a man married a nb person and they refuse to do household chores leave them and make them do it by themselves
While you’re at it, teach him to properly wipe is buttcheeks to pristine condition.
Teach him? What are you his mommy? Why can’t he learn on his own? Is he a child?
Maybe I’m just not interested in raising grown adults. Not only are you doing all the labor around the house but now you get to do more emotional labor teaching basic skills. Yay a two for one special.
If men wanted to learn how to do something, they would learn how to do it. Just as they do with any hobby and skills they have.
You aren't obligated to teach them either for the record, you can help if you want to but it's not something you HAVE to do. Adults are capable of teaching themselves how to do basic chores, and the internet exists
@@sofastuffing fr fr fr
Fr the reason im quite afraid of marriage is because i worry about my husband being lazy and would want me to do everything all the time even when im ill. Also im worried that he would insult my cooking and everything i put effort into since i know that my grandfather and father are lazy and only criticize women all day I hope i will find someone who will help me around the house and appreciate me in this twisted world and not be a big baby about everything. My discouraging granny and mom through all my childhood dont help either with their "you won't find a man like that, all are lazy and toxic" so i quite lost hope
These men will insult their wife’s cooking and then throw a hissy fit when their wife doesn’t cook for them.
I've never understood the Boomer Humor "I hate my wife" jokes. No wonder they have the highest divorce rate of any generation.
It really is a strange phenomenon. They're the ones who abandoned tradition and went off to find their "soul mate" only to find out oh hey there's a reason people did things they did for thousands of years without change. Oh who am I kidding, they never realize anything the lead poisoned fools that they are. Death to all people 55+
These aren't boomers. These are millennials. It seems "boomer" is anyone over 30 to a lot of you. Boomers are in their 50's or older and in nursing homes. Or dead.
Do they?, i think they rather get stuck in their marriage. I think young people divorce more
@@akiraholland457 Actually, Baby Boomers divorce at a much higher rate than any other generation. Millennials and Gen Xers, on the other hand, have actually been credited for falling divorce rates(at least to my knowledge, that is).
@@akiraholland457 nah, younger people don't rush into marriage so it's more likely that they're already fully committed by the time they get married. as opposed to boomers who rush into marriage because of societal expectations to get married ASAP in the relationship so as not to have the dreaded and shameful "premarital sex" dun dun dunnnn
As someone who grew up with parents in an abusive relationship, it's weird to see couples jokingly abuse each other. I guess to some people who haven't experienced it seems funny to them? Like nothing is funny about your spouse tracking you.
I agree. It's so weird to see people...somewhat romanticize and display all of this behavior to impressionable kids that will grow up thinking these relationships are all they will be able to get. My parents should not have been married and they had children to fix their own marriage. There's nothing good about displaying this behavior as a joke to kids who don't know any better.
@@ashwoods2334
My parents are exactly the same. It's quite painful to see how some ppl treats these type of relationships as a joke.
@@TamaoMizuki It is painful...especially when you know it can lead to more of what happened to us and others in the future. :(
Yeah, this type of content unearthed a massive load of trauma pertaining to my parents and their past and present relationships. Like when you know something is wrong generally, but you forget you saw it in your home growing up.
I relate to u and all the comments beneath u, we will be/live better in the future guys, don't give up.
@5:21 is giving big "my parents are separated but not divorced yet" vibes
any grown man who hates body hair is a red flag
These are just internalized “truths” for people who don’t know their issue is communication. Like, household chore division should have been worked out before the marriage, and if your partner couldn’t pull their weight you work it out or break up. Petty digs and insults are the easy way out for people who can’t verbally work through a disagreement. Learn deescalation and how to communicate, compromise, and tackle life together as a team.
That’s it.
literally had an argument with my partner yesterday because we both failed to communicate and hurt eachother's feelings.
But we both de-escelated the conflict and sought understanding and resolution and now we're fine. I could never understand just holding onto that one moment for a whole relationship.
@@Jane-oz7pp fr
You can't just work out things before your marriage like a set it and forget it situation. Life constantly changes and people learn, grow, and their energy ebbs and flows. Couples need to communicate in an ongoing way about how to manage the important parts of life like meals, home maintenance, laundry, and money.
Source: I have been married for 16 years.
my fiancé and i literally talked about which chores we enjoy and don't mind doing (especially w our respective sensory issues) before he even proposed. if one of us does something that bothers the other, we talk about it as soon as we can. it's honestly not that difficult. figuring out how to verbalize my thoughts in a way that makes sense is the hardest part for me, but i think that's because i'm probably autistic.
it's even more terrifying to see this in real life. My best friend moved together with her boyfriend, and he almost threw a tantrum like a child for being asked to do the laundry (For a solid 3 minutes before she agreed). She does most things in the household because "he just doesn't like it and isn't good at it" ?!? while working a ton. Like, good luck with that for the rest of your life....
Those types of men are not hopeless, they're freaking useless.
Parents really should be teaching their boys to do household chores when they're little, since it's way harder to get them to do it when they're older. As a man, I can tell you that it was way easier to get used to a 9 to 5 job than it is getting used to spend even an hour cleaning the house. It's something about knowing you're gonna get paid that makes it easier to force yourself through something than it is when it's unpaid. It took months of me actively trying to do it in order to rewire my brain to make it easier. The only reason women seemingly have an easier time of doing it is because they're socially conditioned to since childhood.
PS. I'm not saying that we shouldn't try to encourage grown men either, I'm just saying it's way harder and as you've heard they're going to behave like man-children and throw tantrums. In cases when it's impossible to make them do it, women shouldn't have to put up with it and leave them, because at that pint that isn't just a person who is socially conditioned not to do chores, but an asshole.
That's a breakup reason right there. I don't care what people think, people like that don't change, so it's all downhill from that first tantrum
@@bratprica6383 yeah, his dad has done his laundry and cooking until he was like 28....
@@bratprica6383 I absolutely agree. I'm a young woman but growing up my parents didn't teach me much in terms of house chores. Whenever I tried to help them or asked them tot each me they always just told me to leave these stupid things to them because I have studying to do.
Naturally, when I got older my dad still wouldn't let me do stuff, because he did it faster/better, while my mom was suddenly shocked that I don't know how to do xyz without proper instructions because how could I not know. She seemed to think that if you are female and of adult age, lightning strikes you in the head and you suddenly know how to do chores properly, because how could you possibly not know.
I'm not saying I'm not grateful to them or that I wish I'd been forced to do chores instead of studying, but I wish I'd had more practice and was taught properly, not with condescending remarks. Now, everything seems like it's too much and/or too hard and I also feel useless for not being very good at it.
@@Marina_7 I absolutely feel the last part and I encourage you to realize it's normal, not just for house chores, but for any new skill someone picks up, especially when they've been discouraged from learning it.
I advise you to just push through those doubts it like I did, you'll thank yourself later.
I have seen my uncle get grumpy and go home because he didn't get an extra egg. There was only enough for everyone 💀. Because of such experiences, immature guys are my biggest turn offs.
My partner was super helpless until I got a chronic illness. Guess what? He learned to cook healthy food and discovered he liked it! He also got better at folding laundry and remembering to clean the bathroom sometimes when I couldn't get out of bed. Now that it's partially in remission, our division of labor is much easier since we can both do everything to about the same skill level!
In my early 30s some guy arrived at a trivia group and immediately started talking about his wife being a “ball and chain”. All the women in the group immediately gave him a horrified look and I think he expected us to laugh. Not sure. He was a drag the whole time and not good at trivia. At least his wife got a break from him. But man, no one else should have to spend time with him.
Also, most of the group was single people who would love to have a living partner. Why do people who have it take it for granted? It seems that immature people are married. Maybe they should get tax breaks. That never made sense to me.
@@JDMimeTHEFIRST it’s always easier to see the dumb people who are married, mostly because the dumb people are the people who yell. There is a large amount of people who get married and are happy, loving, and loved
@@placeholderdoe Yes, not all marriages are shams. Glass half full. Let's normalize healthy partnerships, and renounce toxic tropes.
I’d like to think that he didn’t actually have a wife
Can we normalize healthy married couples in loving marriages? Catana Comics are a good representation of what long term couples should be, not these weird “mY wIFe IS a NaGgIng wHoRE” jokes. Like relationships are PARTNER ships, not a one way thing
Doesn't seem like there'd be a lot of comedy mileage in that ngl
Say it louder for the people in the back!
It is normalized if you just stay off of Tiktok. Tiktok isn't where anyone should go for "normal" or "healthy"...
“Throwing things at my husband to see if he will catch it” is a good one.
@@Quartnee lol Sounds like an Amber Heard defense
"I hate my wife, she's ugly, stupid and can't cook!", "My husband is so silly, he can't even make tea without burning the house to the ground, haha!", "Getting married is like getting sentenced to life without parole!" and then "Why don't people want to get married these days? Why do they hate families so much? What's wrong with them?"
4:06: all I could think of is the fact that home delivery exists, like just order something directly to ur house
After watching these it makes me want to call my parents and thank them for showing me what a normal loving marriage looked like where everyone shared responsibility’s.
Why don't you? They'd probably appreciate it a lot
I'm lucky that my fiance grew up with parents in a loving marriage at least
My parents got divorced in 1997 (when I was nine). So love _for themselves_ wasn't even needed. What they *did* have in massive quantities was/is love for *us:* their kids.
However, they actively co-parent: because they're still involved as grandparents to my son.
They were/are very active as parents in our lives (mine, my two brothers and my half-sister on my mom's side... who also became a surrogate daughter to my dad's side of the family).
They made sure we all learned all chores equally. Which means, my brothers *DO* cook, clean (my younger brother makes *THE BEST yellow rice ever while the youngest one is THE BRUNCH KING* ) *and do laundry.*
I taught my son to do laundry. Since he's developing rather early, I ain't touching his ji--zz soiled undies no more: so that's his problem now 😁. He's going to be ten in October, yet he's taller than a lot of grown women already: he's 5'1"/1.55m.
Ikr
lmao dreams
I've never found the 'bitter old marriage couple' trope funny. Like, if you're miserable, get a divorce? Also loving the hair! 💜
Edit: Because a lot of people are commenting I want to expand my comment because it's very simply worded. When I say 'just get a divorce' I'm talking about the situation where the man continually bullies/abuses(?) his wife simply because he can. He's not staying with her because of outside pressure to stay married or anything, he simply thinks that treating his wife terribly is okay. When it comes to situations when they mutually want to divorce but can't afford it or want to stay because of their kids, that's another topic. When both parties can afford divorce and the wife is staying in this abusive relationship, I am by no means blaming her, or the victim of martial abuse in general. I hope I phrase this much better, text on a a screen sounds really cold and distant. Please know I'm not trying to victim blame or shame anyone for being in an abusive marriage. I'm shaming the man(or abuser in general) for being able to divorce his wife but actively choosing not too because he finds it "funny" to harm his wife.
Yeah I agree with ya But I think they found it funny in the sense that their glad their not in that relationship
Or they can relate to it?
Yeah
Honestly I don’t know 🤷♀️
I don’t know what’s funny about being miserable
I don’t like human beings anyways
i get it if it’s like loving bickering but when the whole joke is “haha i hate my wife”…
I hate it that in my homeland, people believe that it is a wife’s role to ensure that the marriage is not miserable, and if the husband doesn’t love her anymore, then it’s her own fault for not being able to ‘save’ her family. :(
According to them, love is about suffering, I guess. But not in a bittersweet romantic way like in fiction.
unless its an arranged marriage, i can't see why you'd marry someone you hate. like sure, i guess the love could "fade" a bit over time, but if they really hate eachother why are they together???
My aunt and uncle fall in that trope but it’s all for laughs, never genuine shouting matches
What's wild is that I bet these same people wonder why younger people despise the prospect of marriage and/or consider it an imprisoning scam.
We have a lot of bachelor parties at my work and Ive had quite a men making "this is my last moment of freedom before im tied down to that ball and chain" jokes to me and ive always asked them why they feel the need to insult their fiance to a stranger.
the real wholesome "couple comedy" was Jenna Marbles' videos. Clearly very exasperated by her tornado boyfriend but still obviously in love and having a good time
That’s literally what all these channels do. Chad Chad just didn’t show it
@@robbiesilverwolf no they don't.
Juli-AN!!
It was always fun watching the annoyance slowly morph to amusement on her face.
@@sarasthoughts yes they do
As a married woman in a healthy and respectful relationship. These tik toks trigger my fight of flight reflexes, Is this what “owning the libs “ is? Making us cringe at toxic relationship pranks?
Literally! Like, why even look at women if you hate them so much, let alone marry them?! So happy my husband and I are setting the precedent of always staying in the honeymoon phase. Like, now a bunch of my friends and family try to emulate our relationship. It really starts at home.
@@ariannamyrie9520 I'm glad for u, that sounds sweet! (:
Exactly. I'm a man who loves his wife and these trigger some visceral feeling of pain and dread. Is this... humour?
I don't think this humor is political. Lots of "libs" enjoy and tell these kinds of jokes and lots of non-"libs" don't indulge in this humor.
I’m conservative (leaning) and I’ve never met someone who finds this kind of “humor” funny. I will readily admit that the basis for this type of “humor” is definitely a man problem though, regardless of political views. Jokes like the tiktoks we see here confuse the fuck out of me, why would even want to be with someone you don’t like, never mind married, NEVER MIND having kids. I love doing nice things for my wife, pulling my weight, I probably compliment her 5-6 times a day (not exaggerating) and I thank her each time she does something that benefits the both of us. For example, if she does the dishes, I’ll pretty much always say “thanks for doing the dishes my love, I appreciate it”. Obviously I do the dishes regularly as well, but my point is that I LOVE to make my wife feel valued, heard, respected, and confident. I also flirt with her constantly and try to live the notion of “you are dating your spouse for the rest of your life”. She’s an incredible woman and deserves to feel that way.
enemies to lovers? no no no, lovers to enemies
all those videos about pranking the wife, where he pretends to do something nice and then crush it always make me cry. like she always looks so happy and then gets made fun of on camera by her own husband
This isn't even a twinge of cringe, this is a truckload
My wife saw a tiktok where a lady was like "babies are so exhausting but my husband won't help because he says he has nothing to contribute until its first birthday." She has been plagued by the thought of it ever since.
it's crazy that people like that exist but all we can control in this world is our own actions. it's just funny to me when people act like misogyny doesn't exist and these are strawman arguments when it's very prevalent
He's got hands. He can feed, rock, bathe, burp, bounce, change, play peekaboo he feels so moved. It's so demeaning to say men are incapable of these things
So what I'm getting from this is, peak masculinity is being about as competent and emotionally stable as a spoiled two year old..?
my dad is this exact way to my mom. the only good thing I've gotten out of it is that I know exactly what I DONT want in a partner. the whole helpless act shouldn't work for 40 whole years, but it does. never putting up with that.
I grew up in a home where my mother spent most of her time acting like my father’s servant. He fully embraced learned helplessness (EDIT: the correct term for this is ‘weaponized incompetence’!) to the point that, when my mom was pregnant and on bedrest, I had to show my father how to do laundry. He was so belligerent and it was such a hassle for me that I just handled the family laundry for the duration of my mom’s bedrest. I was 8. And of course he knew nothing about cooking, so whenever my mother was sick/away from home I was in charge of the menu, cooking, and cleanup.
In households that embrace patriarchal Christianity, the wives get a terrible deal, no doubt. But oldest daughters have it pretty rough too.
I can't believe people do that to each other. Especially as Christians. Because that goes completely against what it says in the Bible. My parents are both Christans and my mum did most of the work at home. But my father build the house I grew up in, with his own hands, in his spare time. They both really lived to the idea that a man puts his wife and her needs above himself. And my mum always treated him equally in that, just as much. And so my brothers and sisters grew up learning more or less the same things, we could all do all the chores in the house and take care of our younger siblings.
@@HolandaChiquita I live in a rural part of the southern US. Religion is ubiquitous and it invades almost every facet of life here. It isn’t enough for someone to simply worship who they want in their own way so long as they aren’t hurting anyone, which fwiw I fully support the right to do! But that’s not enough for a lot of folks. They have to shove everyone else into it as well. And for a lot of folks the religion is just a Trojan horse for oppression and manipulation and control.
You think Christians are bad? Islam would like to speak with you:)
@@timferrell6253 I was raised in evangelical Christianity. That’s what I am personally familiar with, that’s what I am educated in, that’s what influences the politics and social atmosphere in my area, and therefore I limit my commentary to that. It would be deeply unfair and disingenuous for me to speak regarding a different religion that I don’t know.
Beyond that, I’ve seen plenty of damage done in the name of the religion of my youth. There is much to speak out against right there, I don’t need to venture out to other religions to find something to be appalled by.
@@Beetlejam837 thats fair and I respect that. I just feel like bashing Christianity is as popular as hating on nickelback meanwhile Islam criticism is largely absent. Really just an observation, not trying to pose it as a fact or anything
Leave it up to Chad to interrupt my workout with a quality twinge of cringe
Leave it up to Chad to interrupt my ‘me laying down bored’ with a quality twinge of cringe
I AM LITERALLY WORKING OUT RN WTFFF
I'm at work so this is a great interruption cus **** work lol.
YESS
the only twinge ya want during a workout ahah
The couple with the cinnamon rolls come up on my fyp occasionally AND I DESPISE THE HUSBAND
HE IS EXACTLY WHAT I DONT WANT TO BE IN LIFE
Lemme fix that comparison to what it should be:
It’s like deleting all your apps on your tablet because you found one that you never get bored of and makes you the happiest
Conservatives: "I hate my wife and my life!"
Also conservatives: "The sanctity of marriage must be preserved at any cost!"
Also conservatives: flock to shit like Ashley Madison, the affair website
True.I'd laugh if they weren't ruining it for everyone around them.....
"Marriage is about making sacrifices!" All of our life choices are about making sacrifices.
Why is this a conservative thing?
This is not a conservative thing LOL
Okay but really this kind of relationship is a genuine fear of mine. I’d literally rather be single my entire life than be stuck in a marriage with any guy who disrespects me like that as a ‘joke’. My parents had this kind of relationship. Mum does everything and gets shit on by a man-child who came home from his job of sitting in a chair all day to sitting on a couch all night complaining about dinner and having real no interest in his wife or kids. They eventually split up (which was beneficial to everyone, my Dad’s attitude and outlook changed when he had to learn how to do everything for himself) but as a woman I do my best to steer clear of these kinda guys. Good thing is, I think relationship and gender dynamics are changing a lot recently.
me too. I thought I was the only one with this fear.
Just don't date guys like this? They're pretty easy to spot in the wild, and so are good guys.
I met my husband in high school, he would do cute shit like give our girl friends chocolate if they were on their period, and was super respectful in general. He was always there for me, and was my best friend for years. And unlike 'nice guys' and 'white knights' he didn't expect ANYTHING back from any girl (or guy!) he was nice to, ever. Pure unconditional love.
I know I'm lucky and all, but there are so many great guys out there. Guys you get to play games with and cuddle with and enjoy the sun with. Guys who are happiest in life when they get to share it with you.
Funny thing is, I'd do anything for my husband, cook and clean if he'd want me to (he doesn't). If only these tiktokkers realized you can't have the 'doting wife' stereotype if you don't respect and support the fuck out of her always. It's a two way street, after all.
Sorry, I just get defensive about men because so many of them screw it up for the others, and I feel like if we all dare to believe in them they could prove themselves. Rant over.
@@foxygrin reading your reply makes me hope that i can find this guy one day and treat him like the king he deserves to be.
@@foxygrin i hope to have a relationship like that one day 🙏 its wonderful to see two people who gives and takes equally
@@foxygrin genuinely so happy for you, you have what most people look for in their life. But honestly in my dating experience, some men who are interested in you will treat you well and be completely different to what they’re actually like. They’ll act compassionate and caring at first. Then once you’re in a relationship it’s a complete change and there are massive red flags. It’s really not that easy to spot sometimes. I’ve had an ex boyfriend like this and it shocked me because the relationship was so wonderful. We were even talking about getting engaged in the future and he was so friendly with my family. All was good. But after coming home from a family dinner one night, I overheard him talking to his friend on the phone complaining about the ‘shitty’ dinner my Mum had cooked us and how ‘poor’ my family was (my family aren’t poor, but they do live a quaint lifestyle and my mum tends to put all her value in experiences rather than buying lots of material products). It wasn’t just what he said either, it was the way he said it. Completely different person, cold and mean. It scared me so much that I broke up with him that night. I didn’t tell my family the real reason why because it would’ve hurt them a lot, but I feel like I dodged a massive bullet with that one.
Maybe because you met your husband in high school, it was easier for you to see what kind of person he is really. I wish that were the case for me, but I still hold hope that I’ll find someone respectful and kind.
8:08
Genuinely jumped out of my skin
Wife: "We should improve our marriage somewhat"
Husband: "Yet you participate in the marriage! Curious! I am very intelligent."
I’m so thankful my man doesn’t even joke about stuff like this. I feel like even if you’re “joking” it’s still perpetuating the stereotype that women should be doing everything to serve men. Especially on a platform with younger audiences who are going to learn that and think it’s okay or normal.
agreed. the way a person speaks is direct insight to the way they think. if they're humor consists of racist, sexist, and homophobic jokes... whether they openly express their bigotry or not, they have internalized that kind of messaging and will perpetuate it to some degree. and I'm not saying there's no room for dark humor, but it needs to come from a place of tact and understanding otherwise it's plainly offensive.
and anyone who thinks humor can't be either of those things is part of the problem. very glad that you're dating someone who understands this and treats you with the equity you deserve as a human being.
My bf is so done with human life that he does not even recognize these type of jokes. :D
One time, I tried to make a (clumsy) "haha, I'm just a stupid, old gf" joke and his reaction was "ehrm, what?" + blank face
the jokes are decades old and completely overdone anyways. ive heard these jokes from men who had those relationships, and men who actually shared responsibility, and they have just simply never been well crafted or witty in the slightest. they are just by principle, not funny.
I love having a good "lol" at a dying marrige.
Its not even dying, its been dead and theyre manipulating it like a puppet on strings
it’s literally a rotting corpse getting dragged
If people only knew what it's like to be in a loving, healthy relationship. It does not have to be like this. Good people do exist, you don't have to settle.
Where are they? Is there like an annual "decent man" conference I can drop in on?
@@missc2742 I always like to think that, If me and the next person think of ourselfs and do our best to be a good person, then there's more people out there also still trying to be good people as well, may be hard to find depending on the place, but not impossible, so don't lose hope ! I know you'll find your special someone someday !
Being a lesbian is also a thing haha. Not that there aren't good men out there but you could also try the other side if you swing that way. No wonder contards hate the LGBT so much. The women are taking "their" women.
if you feel like you're "loosing your freedom" in a relationship either re-evaluate the dynamics of your relationship or just dont have one.
Are… are people okay? I can confidently say that I am no longer scared of being along forever, because it would be so much better than being in a marriage like this
Better to be alone than in bad company.
At first When I was 12-13 I was excited to get a girlfriend/boyfriend whatever it doesn’t matter
But looking after my parents marriage and these tiktoks
Actually I am better off single my whole life.
Sorry but most relationships are not worth it. When my ex was doing the „my girlfriend is an annoying bitch“ thing I left him and he didn’t understand why? …. Well
Agreed
I like seeing how basement dwellers like you cope in this comment section. It’s fun.
i wanna know how those women agree to do this stuff lol don't even wanna imagine a scenario where they come up with these ideas themselves. like, why would a modern, seemingly progressive woman act as her partner's slave for a few likes on a meaningless app?? what about "my husband hates me and doesn't acknowledge everything i do for him and he is also a control freak who will probably kill me if im out of line" is funny? we've been battling misogyny and sexism since centuries. for what? this??
"seemingly" progressive. there you have it.
because it's been normalized. it's been painted as "just a joke" and if anyone thinks it's stupid or toxic shows up , well their called "sensitive" or "humorless". and i don't these women are in anyway progressive .
these are probably all right wingers. they love this shit.
This is the Conservative ideal, my guy
Pick me girls exist. They don’t know how to keep a man so they’ll go with anything, that’s how desperate they are
As someone with parents can confirm that a lot of married couples do indeed hate each other. Except in real life it’s significantly less funny.
9:36 the song ✨✨✨✨
Now you're just somebody that I used to know 😢
7:26 FINALLY someone else thinks theres like some weird kind of sexual tension between the toilet paper and the bear
her in the nicest way possible: "Honey I'm on fire"
Him: "ROLL"
i think he forgot the "stop" and "drop" parts
@@epiclionsault92 or he enjoys the suffering of his wife. who knows!
8:57 that’s gotta be one of the *worst* possible things you could ever say to somebody holding a large, very sharp knife
When I got home yesterday, my parents where watching a movie. And there was an interesting scene.
-Honey, I'm home
-Hello, I made some food. Do you wanlt the onion sauce or do you want the tomato sauce?
-I don't mind either. Whatever is easier. You must be tired from working all day at home
-Hahaha, I relax at home
NO woman would ever say that
so it's not okay to "expose" kids LGBTQIA+ relationships is indoctrination but teaching them to accept being in a toxic/potentially abusive heteronormative relationship is...fine?!?
darnest things
Yes
Both are not fine
@@le_prime4385 weak bait try harder
they just don't want the LGBTQIA+ to be happy coz what's the use of following the bible if they're more miserable than the gays
“Let’s turn our unhealthy marriage that is on the verge of divorce into a unfunny tiktok!!”
That's not entirely fair.
They're not _funny_ .
@@fricketyfracktraintrack hmm I have to agree they have no humor
"funny" 😬
@@glory5110 don’t worry I made it correct 👍
''And let's influence younger audiences by introducing them to mysoginic and toxic ideas!!''
“Bearch” is a very underrated joke
1:47 It would be a wholesome and extremely sweet gesture IF SHE WAS VOLUNTEERING TO. Why is this grown man making her get him cinnamon rolls 😭 bro.
he could also just get them himself the night before
I once called someone out for these kind of ugly, gross and disrespectful jokes that they were making about their girlfriend. My parents treat it as if I did something heroic and crazy to pull this guy aside and tell him he was an idiot. To me it was just necessary, and I was so annoyed and disgusted that I had to give him a piece of my mind at the time.
Call people out. I was in a safe place surrounded by family and friends and I was comfortable doing it, and if you feel safe and that you could call someone out without danger to yourself, please do it. No one should be seen as a hero for calling out bad behaviour. It should be normal.
Here’s the context: My brothers neighbour/friend was over for drinks one night while we were staying with my brother. The neighbour had a girlfriend, both of them had kids to different partners and were at least 40. The neighbour was making super misogynistic and gross jokes about his girlfriend while she was standing right next to him and later when she left to get something and when the other guy that was also making those kinds of jokes had left, I pulled him aside with my sister in law and told him how gross he was being. He was basically acting like she would never leave him so he could make any joke he wanted and then play it off with ‘but I love her’ and at first that was how he defended it too, that she /knows/ that he’s just joking, so it was fine. I asked him if he would like it if his daughters boyfriends spoke like that about them, and how inappropriate and gross and disrespectful it was to treat his girlfriend the way he was.
After our discussion he sort of understood, and said he would apologise to her when he got home with her. I told him he should apologise in public since he made those jokes in public and she needs to know that he isn’t just sorry behind closed doors, but will admit he was wrong in front of his friends too. He did end up apologising with us around and also in private but he seemed to think it was just one thing he said that was bad but at least it was better than nothing.
Tbh it should be normalized to have people like you, thank you so much for that (:
Amen
I once was called out on smth similar (on a joke that my bf is too childish and immature and it makes me tired)
and you know, it really put things is perspective and made me realize that, we were better off without each other.
I love this honestly but makes me mad that for most men to realize how gross they're being, you always gotta bring up like.. their daughters or moms or any women from their family to make them understand :/
Man, I would have been trashed on in my family for doing that. In fact, every time I DO, they have a problem with me. My extended family, anyway. I cut them all off recently after tolerating their emotional and mental abuse toward me for years.
I can't even bring myself to call someone who's actually being an insufferable jerk a "bitch," so referring to a loved one as such, let alone a spouse-even as a joke-is just unimaginable for me. I'd just feel like the biggest asshole. It's depressing to think that not only is the husband in this situation comfortable describing his wife that way, but the wife is used to it.
On a more upbeat note, I can't believe you're already at a million subscribers, but I certainly think it's well-deserved. Congratulations.
right?? Honestly.. It seems like there's some underlying issues being projected. A very unhealthy marriage. Yet lowkey enough for neither spouse to do anything, honestly it's very sad - especially considering your husband/wife is supposed to be like, someone you deeply and wholeheartedly love- ;;
Go look up the channel. See how happy they are
exactly
@@messiahofthefirst.3415 Nahhh its not "lowkey enough for neither spouse to do anything". Its more than enough to have a deep conversation which either ends in change of behavior+understanding or divorce.
but the reason they dont, is because of societal normalisation and the need to fit into the standard of "If you're X years old you should be married with a wife and kids".
This is not to say that the people involved dont have their fault in it. They definitely do, but I thought I should bring it up that as humans we're very flawed, and its not easy to run a family, so not everyone should be required to start one in the first place.
Its definitely easy to respect and love someone you're close to tho, which these ppl are lacking in.
@@steel5101 Yeah thats what I generally mean. And I honestly suspect it's not as bad as the videos in real life, but, the reason there's the videos to begin with which, basically are enough said.
God I love Chad Chad… or whoever this girl is claiming to be “Chad Chad”. Her videos are always exactly what we need. The comedy juxtaposed with the absolute insanity of the things she covers is absolutely perfect. Also, I need that ‘Not Really’ neon sign 😂😂
People still acting like they are forced to get married to merge family businesses and secretly/openly despise each other.
Honestly, as a queer person I've often wondered if straight couples just actually hate each other or not. It's very unclear from the outside.
As an aro person, I will forever remain confused as to why people marry people they hate, or stay with people they hate. I guess I could understand if it's better for finances or the children, but outside of that why even stay?
No... Straight couples normally do not hate each other. They for sure should not. Sadly it seems some do. And the divorce rate shows its not that easy to find an actual partner for life
As an ace person, I will forever bewildered by wanting your partner to always put on makeup or dress up when vibin or when people ask their partner to drastically alter their appearance
Dont act like queer couples dont have problems too, im saying this as queer person myself
@@yoshikagekira864 The op didn't say or imply queer couples don't have problems, they're just wondering why does it seem like straight couples hate eachother. You brought up something that no one commented
After my parents divorced I visited my dad. I am the oldest daughter and was about 22 when I visited. My dad
- didn't pick me up from the airport and got my sister to do it
- immediately stopped doing dishes or picking up after himself in the house
- stopped doing laundry
- stopped feeding his dog
- didn't buy groceries
- never cooked.
These were things he was fully capable of doing and had been doing on his own for a year.
He just expected me to do all the chores as an adult guest in his home and just perform all these tasks without being asked or thanked. I haven't visited him since and don't think I will. He visited me in my new home country and expected me to entertain him, made me pay for his bus fare, and made me buy him illegal substances. I'm just done with male incompetence.
that's exactly what happens to me when i visit my brother. he stops feeding the cats, expects me to clean his entire apartment if my parents are also visiting from my home country, and overall just turns me into his servant. and he's shocked when i tell him that i don't want to visit him. AND he's getting married next month as if he's ready to take on the responsibility of marriage when his toilet looks like inside of a person's lungs who's been smoking for 30 years. i'm just done with him. best i can do is to respect myself enough to never settle down for anything less than a man who's willing to share these responsibilities. good luck to you as well, Veronica. i wish you lots and lots of patience and resiliance.
“Male incompetence” sounds more like “bad luck”. I’ve been doing my own laundry, dishes, cooking, etc since I was 12. And in every relationship I’ve been in, I was the one to clean up, pick up, organize, designated drive, etc. I had a single mom who never let any of that lazy “mommy do it for me” stuff fly which included everything from homework to buying my own greeting cards for family members. I had countless friends who’s mommies cleaned their clothes and did their homework and wiped their butt till they found a wife. I don’t feel bad for their wives today. Because if I could see that this person is lazy and entitled, their girlfriend can see it too. Women make a choice to marry these men and think they’ll always love to clean up after them, or maybe they’ll change his ways and train him. Except when they find out homie hasn’t washed his booty hole once in his life because he thought it was unecessary and feminine to do so, that’s how someone turns out when mom makes excuses for him. The fault lies with both partners.
@@BB-ed4om The fault lies with both partners but not equally. Yeah, you shouldn't marry someone like that, but also "you let me be so incompetent" is not an excuse.
parasitic lifestyle of a psychopath
@@zahravardin1283 warn the wife
Whenever I feel like I’m not deserving to ever be in a relationship, I remember that I’m not whatever the fuck these guys are and I feel better
6:17 my mom does this to me but with random stores she asks if theres anything i want and makes me excited for no reason
That’s abusive behavior
@@s3tm3free_ oh
@@s3tm3free_i don't think so lol not everything is abuse and we don't know their family personally
That's terrible
@@shirokaxoxoit is abuse
i hate how people normalise or believe that hating your s/o is a healthy thing to do. its ok to joke about things but- joking and making a mockery out of your s/o is a whole different thing.
and i never rlly understood the whole "lmao my wife sucks and i hate her sm !!!!😠😠" trope. like- no-one is forcing u to be with her lol you either hate her or love her. choose one man.
I don't understand it at all. Why marry someone you hate? I also hate when men act like they have somehow been forced into marriage by their wives, my brother in christ, were you not the one who asked her to marry you? I know this is slightly off topic but with that whole johnny depp thing, the fact that he was joking about murdering his girlfriend and having sex with her corpse and then AFTER that married her!! Like what? Why do people get married to people they fantasise about killing?
@@frances9975 i understand and agree 100% like- no-one is holding a gun to their head and telling the guys :"u better marry that woman" lol. and the johnny depp one i didnt know omg, thats- crazy. yeaah idk why people fantasy about something like that.
It's still pretty prevalent today, unfortunately. One day my husband and I were shopping for a new mattress, so we were just discussing what we liked or didn't like about the mattresses. The saleswoman commented on how well we got along. We both looked at each other like "what?... We're just talking like normal people." Like it was a novel concept to her that a married couple could pick out a mattress without yelling at each other.
Cis men: we are the pinnacle of functionality and intelligence
Also cis men: I'm just a widdle baby who doesn't know how to do anything 🥺🥺🥺 now rear my children
@Depp no it's not
Thissssssss
Kinda like it’s just a joke….
@@robbiesilverwolf it's not...
@@robbiesilverwolf then why isnt it funny
when a child is more responsible than a PARENT then u did smth wrong 💀