IS GOD GAY? | Ricky Gervais Reads NOAH'S ARK | Universal Comedy

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  • Опубликовано: 16 фев 2021
  • Who else thought God was just throwing a hissy fit when they first read the story of Noah's Ark? Karl Pilkington did...
    Taken from his best-selling show Science the serial Golden Globes host and creator of The Office, Extras, Derek and AfterLife Ricky Gervais reads the story of Noah.
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    #RickyGervais #Standup #GoldenGlobes #Comedy #TheOffice
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Комментарии • 3,3 тыс.

  • @markferrari8955
    @markferrari8955 3 года назад +2847

    So two penguins swim across the ocean to the Middle East waddled across the desert to get on the boat to avoid a flood?

    • @cardinality1975
      @cardinality1975 3 года назад +395

      Yes what doesn’t seem logical about that?

    • @penguincommando1088
      @penguincommando1088 3 года назад +62

      🤣

    • @ChrisLee-yr7tz
      @ChrisLee-yr7tz 3 года назад +240

      Don't be stupid. God just magically moved them there...

    • @R-A-F
      @R-A-F 3 года назад +71

      They are popular book publishers #Penguin ... anything is possible noot noot 🙃

    • @tintin887
      @tintin887 3 года назад +19

      No you dummie..they picked them up along the way

  • @sarmadhabibkhan3036
    @sarmadhabibkhan3036 3 года назад +523

    The Book: Long Long Ago!
    Ricky: I'm gonna let that go.
    *Doesn't let it go*
    🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

    • @fitnesspoint2006
      @fitnesspoint2006 Год назад

      actually most of the hate for gays is not from straight folks but form in the closet gays. So God maybe inthe closet.

    • @adekaiwamisou
      @adekaiwamisou 4 месяца назад +1

      In a distant land.

    • @BusyMEOW
      @BusyMEOW 3 месяца назад +2

      Star Wars makes more sense than religious teachings

    • @CaptainPilipinas
      @CaptainPilipinas 29 дней назад +1

      @@BusyMEOW 'Your Kingdom/Governance Come, Your Will be Done on Earth as it is in Heaven.' - The Father's Prayer.

    • @BusyMEOW
      @BusyMEOW 29 дней назад +1

      @@CaptainPilipinas Cool

  • @muzicloverarya
    @muzicloverarya 3 года назад +487

    Would you like an atmosphere? Of course I fuckin would 😂 😂😂

    • @TallSilentGuy
      @TallSilentGuy 3 года назад +2

      But, more importantly, do you love a party with a happy atmosphere?

    • @joelmacinnes2391
      @joelmacinnes2391 Год назад

      @@TallSilentGuy is there such thing?

    • @JacquelineFox-xo6jn
      @JacquelineFox-xo6jn 2 месяца назад

      The spelling is with a ng on the end of the adjective.

  • @electrichorizons5648
    @electrichorizons5648 3 года назад +974

    Clipped that "straight to genocide" perfect Christian quote lol.

    • @robingarrett3171
      @robingarrett3171 3 года назад +9

      In fairness, that is old testament. Pre-Christian.

    • @user-uu7fe9wi2k
      @user-uu7fe9wi2k 3 года назад +51

      @@robingarrett3171 And so is the Exodus, Ten Commandments, and Original Sin (the whole reason we 'need' salvation). Are you throwing those out because "oLd tEStaMEnT"

    • @robingarrett3171
      @robingarrett3171 3 года назад +6

      @@user-uu7fe9wi2k i am only stating what biblical experts believe. The whole point of Christ was to wash away the past. If you choose to believe the old testament over new it simply defines you as Jewish, which is also fine.

    • @user-uu7fe9wi2k
      @user-uu7fe9wi2k 3 года назад +27

      @@robingarrett3171 What about when Jesus directly said "For verily I say to you, till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled." Matthew 5 : 18. He directly said that everything from the old applies, and remember, Jesus is god according to many Christians, and at the very least he was a perfect messiah from god.

    • @robingarrett3171
      @robingarrett3171 3 года назад +6

      @@user-uu7fe9wi2k i am not the scholar. You seem to be. I only know, and I mean this as a non-scholar, that if certain laws from the old testament had not been changed by man, religion would be very different. And it seems all religions have the path of wanting it both ways.

  • @adamnassorarchive
    @adamnassorarchive 3 года назад +428

    "Good like himself" - I need to wipe those wicked beings off the face of the earth

    • @kotchstevens2321
      @kotchstevens2321 3 года назад +6

      He Got a do what He Got a do..maybe they ate their children..

    • @milmac5052
      @milmac5052 2 года назад +2

      😆👏

    • @Franic19
      @Franic19 2 года назад

      It's like the saying "everyone is a different imagine of god" or however that was going.
      But then God: "I have to wipe them off this planet, those fucking assholes"

    • @richardlewin9282
      @richardlewin9282 2 года назад +5

      But he loves you 😁

    • @ayszhang
      @ayszhang 2 года назад +7

      Yeah, he is all-knowing and all-powerful, and he created evil beings after his image, so he must be evil! And don't forget gay! God is gay too

  • @gerthebear1232123
    @gerthebear1232123 2 года назад +332

    I would pay a large sum to watch Ricky Gervais read the entire bible during a stand-up

    • @troystaunton254
      @troystaunton254 2 года назад +20

      I’d pay a large sum of money for Ricky Gervais and Ben Shapiro to go head to head.

    • @vanavatareight5135
      @vanavatareight5135 2 года назад +4

      @@troystaunton254Head to head about what?

    • @saarza9991
      @saarza9991 Год назад

      @@vanavatareight5135 their shlongs

    • @fantasticmrmonk
      @fantasticmrmonk Год назад +13

      @@vanavatareight5135clearly a religious debate… you missed the class in deductive reasoning, didn’t you?

    • @vanavatareight5135
      @vanavatareight5135 Год назад

      @fantasticmrmonk4288 Nothing clear about that. What is clear is that you have a communication disorder. Also, Ben Shapiro is Jewish, not Christian, so why would Ricky ever be interested in debating him on his religion? Makes no sense.
      If you want to spend money to watch men fight, stick to something more your mental level such as UFC or Wrestlemania.

  • @shiveshp.3271
    @shiveshp.3271 3 года назад +506

    Thumbnail is perfection.

  • @andrewtodaro2874
    @andrewtodaro2874 2 года назад +386

    Well, making a fully grown naked man out of clay and “blowing” life into him says something! 🤣

    • @Fullyautomagic
      @Fullyautomagic 2 года назад +44

      Imagine being so good at oral that you bring dirt to life

    • @organicleaf
      @organicleaf Год назад

      @Aidan m mate, no one Cares or wants to hear it

    • @danquaylesitsspeltpotatoe8307
      @danquaylesitsspeltpotatoe8307 Год назад

      @Aidan m So how much of the bible is true?
      BTW I now own you as the bible says I can so be a good christian and supply your name and address! If you dont you have failed to defend your religion and the bible says you burn for that! Or is thta just another part of the evil bible you pretend doesnt exist? 🤦‍♂🤣

    • @roberthill799
      @roberthill799 Год назад +4

      Awesome! Zombies cruising around Jerusalem! That story terrified me when I was six. By the time I was seven, it became hilarious.

    • @fitnesspoint2006
      @fitnesspoint2006 Год назад

      actually most of the hate for gays is not from straight folks but form in the closet gays. So God maybe inthe closet.

  • @nicolewalsh6656
    @nicolewalsh6656 3 года назад +664

    This is my favourite thing ever! I want him to read all the bible stories 😂😂

    • @franciscodiaz6197
      @franciscodiaz6197 2 года назад +13

      Good... no, Great idea! 👏👏

    • @Nago15
      @Nago15 2 года назад +6

      @@franciscodiaz6197 The Friendly Atheist is reading them:) He is now at Leviticus:)

    • @mikusb9011
      @mikusb9011 2 года назад +5

      I wonder why he doesn't read Quran.

    • @GEOFF0906
      @GEOFF0906 2 года назад +6

      @@mikusb9011 Have a guess

    • @jimperry4108
      @jimperry4108 Год назад +2

      Remember when John Oliver did the bunny book? Something like that? lol Would kill!!!

  • @Zorga13
    @Zorga13 3 года назад +1501

    Basically, God is everywhere, including in the closet.

  • @Siphamandla.Ngcobo
    @Siphamandla.Ngcobo 3 года назад +885

    It's been a while since I've actually laughed during a stand up clip.

  • @spinny003
    @spinny003 3 года назад +322

    His full run on The Book Of Noah is pure perfection. Some of the funniest stand up I've ever seen.

    • @jefftaylor19
      @jefftaylor19 3 года назад +7

      Actually, if you read the Quran, we find out that the raft was made of ropes and logs. These were primitive people. It also says that it was a local flood in Judea and the raft was for Noah, his family and followers and his domestic animals, all "his" animals. It says the raft landed on the hills of Judea. Now this is the Dead Sea. It is a location below sea level. In a catastrophic post Ice Age flood, this area is like a bathtub.
      Peace

    • @spinny003
      @spinny003 3 года назад +38

      @@jefftaylor19 ok

    • @jefftaylor19
      @jefftaylor19 3 года назад +3

      @Muhammedlee Boring, I think not. Here is what the Quran is telling you about. It is saying that you can have God's perfect protection by the assistance of two Angelic superpowers at your right and left. This is a book where Solomon can command forces of jinn that can move entire buildings in a blink of an eye. It has battle scenes where there are invisible angels assisting believers. It is a book that warns of an impending disaster for humanity and a book that shows the incredible heaven that awaits those who decide to believe. It is about how you, yes, you, can have all of this support and protection in your life if only you would submit to God's laws. Now how cool is that? This is all in our hands if we only decide.
      Peace.

    • @jefftaylor19
      @jefftaylor19 3 года назад +1

      @Muhammedlee Sometimes we can change, God willing. 30 years ago, I used to be an atheist or agnostic at best, then I decided to investigate what the truth behind all those myths were. It was a long journey until 2014, where I was guided to the truth. What was the collective message? Don't you think it is unscientific to assume to be right without investigating the veracity of your convictions or of opposing theories? A scientific mind assumes he is wrong. Then he tries to prove he is wrong. Then, after failing to prove that he is wrong, he can accept his conclusions. What we have now is a book that is composed mathematically with occurrences that are way beyond probability, way way way too many "coincidences". The Quran has been discovered to contain a mathematical code with the number 19 as a common denominator. It simply provides mathematical proof the this book was not written by any human capabilities. It is not from a human being. Well, now what? It means that I better read what it says to investigate further. Low and behold, it says that God has always been sending down to this planet information about why we are here and how to succeed. It says that we screwed up in our past life and this is our last chance to reform. Uh oh. Well, we can shrug this off as simply magic or fairy tales, and fit perfectly in with the crowd, or, we can take notice and look at this seriously. The choice is ours. You don't have to do anything. But we learn from science for every action, there is a reaction. The Quran (a supernatural, superhuman composition) says that ignoring this information spells doom. (Should we Laugh out loud or should we cry?) The popular opinion is to just assume there is no purpose to life and to squander this precious opportunity with ego pampering and the pursuit vanities and play Well, do what you want. That is what God wants. Freedom. In the end, we will find out why each of us deserve what we get. We all were suppose to be worshipping "God ALONE" by following "His" scripture alone to succeed.
      Well, I found out long ago that "Cool" is not cool. It actually gets pretty stupid. Fitting in takes no courage and is no way to base one's life decisions.
      Maybe someone will decide to be inquisitive, God willing. Here is more information:
      www.goodreads.com/book/show/10772913-quran
      ruclips.net/video/OANBzSqko_0/видео.html
      ruclips.net/video/IIuFyPnQiCw/видео.html
      submission.org/introduction.html
      www.masjidtucson.org/quran/ReadQuran.php?appendix=1
      ruclips.net/video/ELIVBSzHWxQ/видео.html
      ruclips.net/video/o_WfE1OshIk/видео.html
      ruclips.net/video/E-cGpmERYRE/видео.html
      ruclips.net/video/_MgzxIJKorg/видео.html
      Peace.

    • @jefftaylor19
      @jefftaylor19 3 года назад

      @Muhammedlee Our understanding of physical laws is only conclusive on this minute scale that earth and our universe exists. We are submicroscopic ourselves. We only know a minute amount of information. It's like a virus understanding it's environment inside a microscopic sell. Beyond that, we are lost. Understanding the physics of all of the other universes and realms is far beyond the human scope of awareness. So if you are satisfied with that, then fine. As far as ethics are concerned, anyone can be a nice and decent person. That is not what religion was intended to do. Religion is about discovering our fatal flaw: Arrogance. We think we know more than we know. We think we do more than we do. We think we are more than we are. That's what got us sent to this place.
      We should use our lives to conclude:
      God does everything. We only get to experience the affect of our decision to accept Him or not.
      But you can do what you want with this short flash of time that is called life. The question is, will it benefit you after you die?
      Peace.

  • @alanhaywood2971
    @alanhaywood2971 2 года назад +1113

    This used to be called blasphemy, now it's called common sense.

    • @GEOFF0906
      @GEOFF0906 2 года назад +21

      No, it's called following the sheep and laughing to make yourself feel better

    • @alistairgeorge5082
      @alistairgeorge5082 Год назад +203

      @@GEOFF0906 Funny coming from a religious person.

    • @Venixsky_tests
      @Venixsky_tests Год назад +135

      @@GEOFF0906 This is litteraly what priest ask people to be: good sheeps folowing their master God and the ones that knows the ''truth''.

    • @icycooldrink6085
      @icycooldrink6085 Год назад +77

      @@GEOFF0906 A bit late to the party, but, yeah, a really odd observation to make.
      I mean, Ezekiel 34:31 - "You my sheep, the sheep of my pasture, are people, and I am your God, declares the Sovereign LORD."
      There is a side of this argument that self-identifies as being part of a flock under the supervision of a shepherd, but it's certainly not the side you're accusing.

    • @alanthompson8515
      @alanthompson8515 Год назад +45

      @@icycooldrink6085 How can you tell that you’ve been brainwashed?
      When someone calls you a sheep and you’re proud, not offended.

  • @ibizenco
    @ibizenco 2 года назад +98

    The Children's Edition? I didn't even know there also is an adult edition.

    • @richardlewin9282
      @richardlewin9282 2 года назад +2

      Yeah no different 🤷

    • @SamuelBlack84
      @SamuelBlack84 3 месяца назад +2

      A 600 year old man, his wife, and two of every animal on earth
      One can only imagine the horrible concepts of eroticism involved

  • @aquamon68
    @aquamon68 Год назад +173

    Noah was a very talented man . He managed to save amoebas and other minute one cellular organisms and he did it without any microscope or petri dishes, just his bare hands and eagles eyes.

    • @as7river
      @as7river Год назад +4

      Noah was a woman? I never would've guessed.

    • @aquamon68
      @aquamon68 Год назад +10

      @@as7river He was gender fluid, needed both perspectives to save humanity and the animal and microbial kingdom. Peace.

    • @davidarchibald50
      @davidarchibald50 Год назад +9

      Why two by two for unisexual organisms...I never got that bit...maybe god forgot them

    • @as3609
      @as3609 Год назад +3

      @@aquamon68 And when god flooded the world, was that with gender fluid too?

    • @debrajones9325
      @debrajones9325 Год назад +3

      And he didn't feed them nor toilet them..!

  • @tommyclark4947
    @tommyclark4947 3 года назад +265

    I've been scrolling through these comments and I gotta say: Religion is one hell of a drug

    • @chrispbacon3042
      @chrispbacon3042 3 года назад +25

      It is the drug off the masses.

    • @edmundburke8490
      @edmundburke8490 2 года назад +2

      @@chrispbacon3042 well I could equally say as well that, secularism together with consumerism, is also the drug of the masses.

    • @YuvrajWithAGuitar
      @YuvrajWithAGuitar 2 года назад +4

      drugs are meant to make you ecstatic! try it!

    • @penboyasgod6103
      @penboyasgod6103 2 года назад +8

      And the worst part of it is that the religious try to make it *so easy to swallow.*

    • @ramaraksha01
      @ramaraksha01 2 года назад

      Not religion - Heaven is the drug
      Amazing that so many even highly educated & intelligent people think they can shamelessly live like prostitutes/gigolos/leeches/freeloaders do down here, mooching off their rich Sugar Daddies and living a life of ease & comfort!
      amazing, just amazing to see this level of brainwashing

  • @ramptonarsecandle
    @ramptonarsecandle Год назад +26

    Not feeling too bright?
    Smile and remember there are grown adults that actually believe that 2 Penguins walked all the way from Antarctica to get on a boat.

    • @josephwells8699
      @josephwells8699 Год назад

      I know grown adults (of course because they are grown doesn't make them adults) that believe that everything in the universe came from nothing.🤣🤣

    • @ramptonarsecandle
      @ramptonarsecandle Год назад +5

      @@josephwells8699 I'm not sure if your comment is directed at me, Joseph but I'll respond just the same.
      I'll assume from your comment you're either a creationist, ID proponent or religious know nothing. Apologies if I'm incorrect but when people comment about the universe coming from nothing, to me it usually signifies a somewhat lower than normal intelligence. You may of course be the exception but I somehow doubt it.
      In physics, things do not begin to exist. The conservation of mass means that things form from other things already in existence. So it is meaningless for you suggest that the universe came from nothing. Maybe educate yourself before leaving crass comments? Just an idea that probably went over your head.

    • @josephwells8699
      @josephwells8699 Год назад

      @@ramptonarsecandle I am a Christian and a creationist. When you say that in physics, things do not begin to exist, but that the conservation of mass means that things form from other things already in existence, I would suggest that is meaningless. It is nothing more than an idea that cannot be proved, none of you were there millions of years ago to know what went on back there.
      If what you say were true? Then surely you would know how life began, but Richard Dawkins, the most outspoken evolutionist that I am aware of, stated that he doesn't know how life began. I would suggest to him that he stop claiming evolution to be a fact, until he knows how life began. I won't hold my breath though.
      If you ever see him ask him to contact me and I will tell him how life began.

    • @ramptonarsecandle
      @ramptonarsecandle Год назад

      @@josephwells8699 Ok - to me that means you've been indoctrinated, probably from birth but most certainly at some point in your life. It also probably means you're from bible belt America where that type of simple mindedness is seen as a virtue as long as you keep paying your church.
      As for the conservation of mass, it is easily provable, maybe look up the Laws of Thermodynamics and you'll see, or maybe not given you're a creationist.
      As for life starting, no I don't know but nor do you, remember “God did it” is not an “alternate theory.” Theories have to be supported by verifiable evidence, not declarations of faith. Maybe God did do it, but until you prove it, it’s just a hypothesis.
      And abiogenesis is nothing to do with evolution. Evolution is an observed scientific fact you not understanding that is irrelevant it is and will always remain a fact.
      I went to Cambridge and Richard Dawkins taught at Oxford so no I don't know him. Your reply drips with creationist lies and mistruths and all the usual tropes. I would suggest that if you're going to comment on a public platform you might want to be better informed. I could explain more but I see little point.

    • @josephwells8699
      @josephwells8699 Год назад

      @@ramptonarsecandle You are absolutely wrong, I am not indoctrinated, I can make that claim about you. You are also wrong about where I came from, I am UK born and bred. I know several intelligent people who were atheistic evolutionist just a two of years ago, but are now baptized Christians and creationist. What you fail to understand is, that it is God's Spirit that reveals the truths of the Bible to those who seek, and lead them to make a commitment. So given the authenticity of the Bible and all the scientists that were once evolutionist and are now creationist, I cannot accept what you say. Evolutionary scientists always denigrate creationist scientists, as though there academic prowess is greater, which of course is ridiculous.
      I have a lovely book which contains the names and backgrounds of 50 scientists who were once evolutionist but are now creationist. The fact that you went to Cambridge and Dawkins to oxford does not impress me. Let me know when you think you have discovered how life began.
      Why do evolutionist scientists attack a God that they claim does not exist???

  • @leithal1546
    @leithal1546 10 месяцев назад +74

    Don’t forget Noah was 900 years old when he built it. With the help of his two 100yr old sons. Yeah totally believable

    • @neddyseagoon9601
      @neddyseagoon9601 8 месяцев назад +5

      70 years old... Hebrews and others around the world measured time by 13 annual lunar cycles. They were misinterpreted, (by later translators and tale tellers), each 28 day period, recorded as years.

    • @zacmumblethunder7466
      @zacmumblethunder7466 8 месяцев назад +4

      ​@neddyseagoon9601 Makes sense. I've often thought about the coincidence of so many things taking 40 days. Maybe 40 is a mis-translation of "many".

    • @leithal1546
      @leithal1546 8 месяцев назад +4

      @@neddyseagoon9601 so there is wriggle room in bible interpretation?

    • @neddyseagoon9601
      @neddyseagoon9601 8 месяцев назад

      @@leithal1546 I could care less but known facts, (lunar cycle v annual cycle was used to measure longer time periods), certainly beat the unlikely 900 years of life, especially if the alternative is logical.
      It's a bit like "witch" in it's very modern understanding versus the translation meaning "poisoner". And given shared food and water wells, why wouldn't you kill a mass murdering poisoner?

    • @neddyseagoon9601
      @neddyseagoon9601 8 месяцев назад +1

      @@zacmumblethunder7466 Moses supposedly wandered about in dry harsh lands with the Hebrews for 40 years, wasn't it? Now, 40 months makes a bit more sense given the unlikely survival of his people in that length of time. Many I imagine would've wondered off in any case, in my mind.

  • @lightyagami1752
    @lightyagami1752 2 года назад +29

    Amazing how he went full TED talk for a while. Only much better informed than their usual fare.

    • @Nat88123
      @Nat88123 2 года назад

      He has such brilliant regard for theological and systematic scientific research for a Ted talk. Ted keeping up the integrity of scientific method. Atheism really is absurd and pathetic.

    • @unit0033
      @unit0033 4 месяца назад

      lol triggered much!!!@@Nat88123

    • @timbradshaw5481
      @timbradshaw5481 3 месяца назад

      He's not well informed, he's taking the story literally then poking holes in it. You can do the same with any story. Harry potter is attacked by a snake and gets rescued by a flaming bird that pokes the eyes of the snake and then cries tears on Harry to save him. Wow what a stupid story, so unrealistic, birds are not made of fire. Tears dont heal people.
      Yet this story resonates with millions and has become one of the most well known stories of the modern time. So it obviously holds meaning even if it's not literally true. The same is true with the bible. You just need to be informed, not take it literally.

    • @unit0033
      @unit0033 3 месяца назад

      trouble is though millions of people believe it to be accurate @@timbradshaw5481

  • @SunnyIntervalsORG
    @SunnyIntervalsORG 2 года назад +28

    From what I understand, most of the old testament is God having a hissy fit!

    • @timbradshaw5481
      @timbradshaw5481 3 месяца назад

      That just shows you don't understand it

    • @chinghamburger2200
      @chinghamburger2200 2 месяца назад

      ​@@timbradshaw5481The bible is completely an utterly fake. Nothing in the bible happened, it was made to brainwash gullible peasants

    • @JacquelineFox-xo6jn
      @JacquelineFox-xo6jn 2 месяца назад

      According to america, donald jessica drumpf,(check his german name) is God .

  • @glitterbeast8375
    @glitterbeast8375 Год назад +18

    The Church: "thanks for being here, small child, would you like a present for being here all the time?"
    Small Child: *visibly excited* "yes please! I live presents"
    The Church: *Hands Child Propaganda*

  • @michelepinsky4948
    @michelepinsky4948 6 месяцев назад +7

    Ricky was GREAT in the movie, "The Invention of Lying". Hilarious move about how the 10 Commandments were written.
    Hilariously funny

  • @Vitringur
    @Vitringur 3 года назад +110

    The rest of this bit is missing, where it turns out god seems to absolutely flamingly fabulous in this childrens book.

  • @harper626
    @harper626 6 месяцев назад +12

    It was quite as an accomplishment for Noah to gather up two of each species (37000 spiders, 11000 ants, 50000 wasps) and many many more.

    • @DavidLS1
      @DavidLS1 4 месяца назад +1

      Maybe the Ark was bigger on the inside. :)

    • @JacquelineFox-xo6jn
      @JacquelineFox-xo6jn 2 месяца назад

      The bible is not like the song you all sang in bible school. Do you run away from bees?

    • @JacquelineFox-xo6jn
      @JacquelineFox-xo6jn 2 месяца назад

      No. Run away from a bear.

    • @DavidLS1
      @DavidLS1 2 месяца назад

      @@JacquelineFox-xo6jn But never run away from a beer.🍺

  • @robleary3353
    @robleary3353 2 года назад +51

    Bloody brilliant! Needed a good laugh after a sh*t week and going back into lockdown!

  • @TheEarl777
    @TheEarl777 3 года назад +278

    The funniest rendition from that famous fiction book I’ve heard.
    Cheeks sore from laughing funny.
    From one of the funniest comedians on this planet.
    Thanks Ricki. Your a good man.

    • @gregorysagegreene
      @gregorysagegreene 2 года назад +6

      Hey, it may be fiction, but it's a bestseller.

    • @roems6396
      @roems6396 2 года назад +10

      @Mittens
      Since it’s the ONLY book that was considered necessary for several centuries, then I would say it had an unfair advantage.

    • @hijodelaisla275
      @hijodelaisla275 2 года назад +1

      His a good man.

    • @gregorysagegreene
      @gregorysagegreene 2 года назад

      @SonicPsyched If you consider Grimm horror nightmare stories that scare the literal BeJesus out of little kids to bring them into line, fairytales.

    • @7inrain
      @7inrain Год назад

      ​@Aidan m Ok ok, we now know that you believe in moronic BS after you posted the same comment over and over again. Please stop now, go back to your bible classes and get on people's nerves there.

  • @elizabethduval7562
    @elizabethduval7562 2 года назад +16

    oh my gosh...i only just discovered Ricky Gervais. He is hilarious!!!

    • @putin2918
      @putin2918 2 года назад

      Listen to karlology

  • @kabe1799
    @kabe1799 2 года назад +15

    Rikki Tikki Tavi was what crossedy mind as soon as that was shown.
    The "...like a fuckin' mongoose..." follow up had me cracking up.

    • @kotsaris87
      @kotsaris87 2 года назад

      Super Hans: "it's a rat"

  • @sidmail8621
    @sidmail8621 2 года назад +27

    The worst part of being bitten by a venomous spider is finding out that your Australian.

  • @droopyofthenorthwestmounted
    @droopyofthenorthwestmounted 3 года назад +131

    I assume all fish were well behaved then? What comes from being in schools all the time, I guess.

  • @hollyhayes9640
    @hollyhayes9640 2 года назад +9

    "Is God gay?" This is the content that I came to RUclips for. 🙏

  • @ribbitgoesthedoglastnamehe4681
    @ribbitgoesthedoglastnamehe4681 Год назад +3

    God: 5000 years old. Beer, 6000 years old. So to understand these stories, you have to understand that God had already been binging for 1000 years.

  • @gd2bking1
    @gd2bking1 6 месяцев назад +6

    Religion - Grown adults talking to Santa Claus and ACTUALLY EXPECTING A PRESENT!!!!!

  • @costaliberta5969
    @costaliberta5969 Год назад +11

    never gets old

  • @electriceyeball
    @electriceyeball Год назад +1

    Friend has a tarantula...when he places it on my forearm, it moves so fast that it seemingly teleports, I sh>t you not. Fd me up 🤣

  • @angelshanafelter6089
    @angelshanafelter6089 3 года назад +3

    I love Ricky so much, it's not right 😭

  • @friendsoftheamazonjungle
    @friendsoftheamazonjungle 3 года назад +35

    British humour ❤️💪😎😂😍

  • @Echo81Rumple83
    @Echo81Rumple83 8 месяцев назад +7

    I love comedians who have no shame in poking fun at religion, be they atheists like Ricky Gervais and Patton Oswald, or very tired, very (understandably) frustrated parents.

  • @brianmartand1527
    @brianmartand1527 3 года назад +16

    Ricky is truly talanted and i get fucking pissed when its over lol.

  • @Fubar2024
    @Fubar2024 8 месяцев назад +1

    The best of honesty

  • @lunevermeil1400
    @lunevermeil1400 3 года назад +25

    Oh my goddess I have never been more accurately accused of being toxic than when you say the flood is God having a gay hissy fit

  • @lillianvioletrose9637
    @lillianvioletrose9637 Год назад +4

    I HAVE actually seen a spider lying down with all 8 legs out to the side. I thought it was dead. Went to pick it up and it CHARGED at me.

  • @bad-bunnyblogger8171
    @bad-bunnyblogger8171 Год назад +6

    In Carl's defence when someone is afraid to come out as gay, they can often hide behind hate.

  • @petrolheadsconcupiscence8081
    @petrolheadsconcupiscence8081 2 года назад +6

    When I read the title i imagined god stomping around in heaven in one of those gay voices and i just lost it!

  • @ThePurpleHarpoon
    @ThePurpleHarpoon 2 года назад +10

    Spiders are fantastic creatures ..... much better than insects.
    I once rescued a spider.
    He had wandered onto the sticky paper on the floor of my flea-catcher, and he couldn't unstick his feet.I grabbed my tweezers and peeled each foot off the sticky paper, which was difficult enough, spider legs are very delicate.
    The tricky thing was, in order not to let each foot get stuck when freed, I had to place a piece of unsticky paper under each foot, before freeing the next foot.
    Took me about an hour.
    When I let him go, on the paving in front of the house, there was some tackiness on his feet, and he walked away like a robot.
    True story.

    • @hijodelaisla275
      @hijodelaisla275 2 года назад +1

      Lovely story.

    • @saarza9991
      @saarza9991 Год назад +1

      He died. My cat ate him

    • @diegestive4167
      @diegestive4167 Год назад

      You broke its knees and was crippled

    • @hew195050
      @hew195050 4 месяца назад

      that’s def something I would do. I never kill or allow an insect or spider to die.

  • @user-mn8tz4nf2s
    @user-mn8tz4nf2s 2 года назад +4

    This is great

  • @willowlane1756
    @willowlane1756 Год назад

    So needed this today...🤣

  • @Kostadin_Arolski
    @Kostadin_Arolski Год назад +2

    Ricky gassed out from doing a spider pose 3 times 😂

  • @Officialmryuck
    @Officialmryuck 2 года назад +7

    This dude pulled out the book of Noah 🤣🤣🤣

  • @robd99
    @robd99 Год назад +5

    I don't think god's gay - but I believe his husband is

    • @zacmumblethunder7466
      @zacmumblethunder7466 6 месяцев назад +1

      Oh, that comment combined with your profile picture.

  • @ingridgrattidge5637
    @ingridgrattidge5637 Год назад +2

    That’s too funny, Noah!

  • @M.T....
    @M.T.... 2 года назад +5

    Yellow Pants: *picks a nose*
    God: Kawabunga it is!

  • @freedomfirst5557
    @freedomfirst5557 3 года назад +35

    So..................God doesn't have the power and intelligence to only kill those who he doesn't want around? Wow....................WOW! God should have worked for Custer's seventh cavalry.

    • @alexrattray8807
      @alexrattray8807 2 года назад

      'Punishment has a definition'
      And choice has one too

    • @roems6396
      @roems6396 2 года назад +3

      @@alexrattray8807
      What choice did the babies make to be punished?

    • @josephwells8699
      @josephwells8699 Год назад

      You people think you are so funny, but it is so sad you do not know what is coming your way....SOON!!!!

    • @josephwells8699
      @josephwells8699 4 месяца назад

      @@Thephrogdoob What you obviously don't understand is that there is a battle going on for the hearts and minds of every human being on earth, and it is a spiritual battle that has raged since the Garden of Eden, where our first parents, Adam and Eve sold us off to Satan, (who was once the highest ranking angel in heaven) and his name in heaven was Lucifer, which meant, "Bearer of Light" or "Morning Star."
      Unfortunately Lucifer a created being coveted the position of Jesus, the Son of God, (which is SIN). In fact he wanted to be God which was an impossibility, and because God is Holy, sin cannot live in His Holy presence.
      So it is all about worship, whether a person worships God or Satan, these are the only two options, and if someone doesn't worship God, then they automatically give there vote to Satan, the evil being that has caused all the chaos and suffering in the world, and of course Satan works through human beings and human agencies to try and frustrate God's eternal plans for you, me and everyone else. However that isn't going to happen, and everything is quickly drawing to a close, when Jesus our Creator is coming very soon to bring an end to this world, and to save His people. There is a test coming very soon to the whole world and everyone who fail the test will receive the Mark of the Beast, and that will bring their eternal end.
      I know which side I want to be on, you still have time to choose.

    • @josephwells8699
      @josephwells8699 4 месяца назад

      @@Thephrogdoob That's what you think, I know it is true and real. The only truth you will find in this world these days, is in the Bible, and almost anything that is counter to mainstream media.

  • @sandyn3384
    @sandyn3384 2 года назад +45

    I love it when he makes fun of religion. It's so easy as well lol🤣

    • @mavis3916
      @mavis3916 2 года назад

      Do you? Do you really?

    • @TheUnMaka
      @TheUnMaka 2 года назад +5

      @@mavis3916 Yes

    • @GEOFF0906
      @GEOFF0906 2 года назад

      Christianity isn't a religion.

    • @sandyn3384
      @sandyn3384 2 года назад +5

      @@GEOFF0906 It is. Lol

    • @sandyn3384
      @sandyn3384 2 года назад +1

      @@mavis3916 Yes

  • @speroed
    @speroed 4 месяца назад +1

    Ricky's animal impressions are brilliant

  • @TheLiamis
    @TheLiamis Год назад +2

    I got that book too from Sunday school.

  • @vinceavery7216
    @vinceavery7216 2 года назад +44

    I love your sense of humor about religion and God .... I feel exactly like you do too , but I still catch myself every once in a while saying .... Oh God help me ..... just by habit . Then I realize ... Oh , that’s right .... He really isn’t there . And if he is .... he is not going to do a thing about my situation . Only I can do that .

    • @late8641
      @late8641 2 года назад +1

      I know how you feel. I've been in a similar situation multiple times. In the long run however, rationality always comes out on top, and I'm like "wait, what am I doing, I'm so silly..."

    • @ninjadejedi
      @ninjadejedi 2 года назад +1

      I am not sure, that kind of perception of god is kind of cave men. Only cave men believed in Gods/Goddess would interevent and help them if they pray or make sacrifice. The more advance religious view is different, God is representing and ideal of goodness and if we follow these ideals and rules our life will be better. I find rational only help in understand the world but not how to live in it, I meant survival of the fittest right ? Why should I not stealing if I can get away with it.

    • @vinceavery7216
      @vinceavery7216 2 года назад

      @@ninjadejedi I have always believed in doing what I think is right .... no matter what .... I still have to live with myself . I have never stolen from anyone , I have worked for everything I have . I have though .... lost a lot of money gambling and I wish I knew a way to get some of that money back from the Casinos , but I am the one that did that to myself too .

    • @ninjadejedi
      @ninjadejedi 2 года назад

      @@vinceavery7216 As I said the JudeChristian perception of god is more adv compare to the cave man, pagan religions, they never expect God to actually help them, they follow the example because they believe that will make their life better. You do know that value is not coming by yourself right ? Why have you not stolen from s.oelse?

    • @vinceavery7216
      @vinceavery7216 2 года назад +1

      @@ninjadejedi I just do not believe in taking from someone unless I worked for it is right . I see your point to a certain point ... I have a very wealthy brother that loves to tell me how rich he is , but I would never steal .... not even from him

  • @enrique_theproducer8786
    @enrique_theproducer8786 3 года назад +6

    hahahha Ricky Gervais always on point

  • @Stickfigure414
    @Stickfigure414 8 месяцев назад +1

    Ricky is amazing

  • @evaluna2088
    @evaluna2088 Год назад +1

    How I love this man! I mean, I am in love, seriously. I live an ocean away, though.

    • @josephwells8699
      @josephwells8699 Год назад

      You need to be in love with Jesus, He will give you life. Your love for Ricky and his sick material will bring you eternal loss.

  • @Mystic-WTF
    @Mystic-WTF 2 года назад +16

    I have just been introduced to your comedy and I freaking love it! You're an awesome comedian! I laughed so hard I almost wet myself. 👍🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏

    • @Dydy-kv3yx
      @Dydy-kv3yx 2 года назад +1

      Watch "Derek" on Netflix, I am obsessed and Ricky is Brilliant!!

    • @Mystic-WTF
      @Mystic-WTF 2 года назад +1

      @@Dydy-kv3yx Thanks. Born in June 1965! Stay safe and laugh whenever possible! ✔💜☮♊

    • @Dydy-kv3yx
      @Dydy-kv3yx 2 года назад +1

      🦀✌☮⚛

    • @roems6396
      @roems6396 2 года назад +1

      Extras on Netflix is amazing.

    • @Mystic-WTF
      @Mystic-WTF 2 года назад

      @@roems6396 Thank you! 💜

  • @chrispbacon3042
    @chrispbacon3042 3 года назад +49

    The Aardvark was the first animal on the are arc because it has two A’s .

    • @Xetairex
      @Xetairex 2 года назад

      😄😄😄

  • @sandyn3384
    @sandyn3384 4 месяца назад

    He cracks me up all the time😂

  • @cindylamb2129
    @cindylamb2129 2 года назад

    One of the best comics ever

  • @klaxoncow
    @klaxoncow 2 года назад +11

    I'm annoyed.
    I used to be made to go to Sunday School as well. But I never got a book or anything.

  • @spacelemur7955
    @spacelemur7955 Год назад +59

    Hats off to this man for finding his atheism at the age of 8. I needed an additional 4 years.

    • @jailcatjones3250
      @jailcatjones3250 Год назад

      I was 6

    • @darakkuunobelu7584
      @darakkuunobelu7584 Год назад +4

      @Purple Syndicalist To be fair, we aren't. Being atheist requires atleast some level of understranding on how world around you can fuction without involvement of any kind of Higher Will.
      That's not something newborn can grasp.
      Without such undestanding humans naturally draw all kind of connections between different phenomena which leads to creation of mysticism and/or different religious practices.

    • @danquaylesitsspeltpotatoe8307
      @danquaylesitsspeltpotatoe8307 Год назад

      @@darakkuunobelu7584 No not having a belief in a mythical not true god is NOT how you are born, you need to develop a bit before you can be brain washed into having a stupid baseless belief! This is why well over 95% get their baseless god belief from their parents brain washing them!
      Theist - believes a god is real
      Atheist - Everyone else
      Which group is a baby in?

    • @viddeliten
      @viddeliten Год назад +6

      Yeah, I was 11. I have raised my daughter kind of agnostically. I want her to think for herself and chose what she believes in.

    • @elwinwinter
      @elwinwinter Год назад

      @@darakkuunobelu7584 We are. Unless you believe in a God or Gods you're an atheist. A fking baby does not instantly believe in the Christian God or any other and is therefore atheist.

  • @Hpalhazred
    @Hpalhazred Год назад

    I would love to see a Ricky Gervais Pureflix special.

  • @badgerrock
    @badgerrock 3 года назад +1

    Brilliant !

  • @shelleyisom2639
    @shelleyisom2639 3 года назад +17

    I like spiders ... I never kill them. I think of them as the humans of the insect world.

    • @leyrua
      @leyrua 3 года назад +1

      First week of quarantine I found a spider living in my windowsill. My daily entertainment was to document HER day.

    • @woda9291
      @woda9291 3 года назад +2

      I don't like spiders but I still don't kill them. I just don't like to kill animals in general.

    • @davekiddie4467
      @davekiddie4467 2 года назад

      I kill them all

    • @pauligrossinoz
      @pauligrossinoz 2 года назад

      Come to Australia. I'll introduce you to the *funnelweb spider.*
      Your attitude to spiders will change fast. It's both aggressive, and the most poisonous spider in the world.
      Those things look like farking demons too ...

    • @PaulA-zp7hn
      @PaulA-zp7hn 2 года назад

      Some are incredibly beautiful, others just look like hairy thugs. I am just glad they don't fly 😬💀
      As pointed out above, one's opinion may depend on the country. I grew up with worst of them so perhaps I got used to them.

  • @party4keeps28
    @party4keeps28 2 года назад +7

    There's a lot of unintentional comedy in the bible. At times it's so absurd that I've laughed out loud and thought, "How do people actually believe this?!?"

    • @JaIch9999
      @JaIch9999 2 года назад +2

      People believe all kinds of BS if it comes from an "authority".
      The Emperor's new clothes. ...

    • @wahajmanan10
      @wahajmanan10 Год назад

      It’s because bible is not in its original form. People have changed it throughout the history

    • @party4keeps28
      @party4keeps28 Год назад +1

      @@wahajmanan10 Are you saying the Bible isn't accurate?

    • @wahajmanan10
      @wahajmanan10 Год назад

      @@party4keeps28 yes

    • @wahajmanan10
      @wahajmanan10 Год назад

      @@party4keeps28 I’m a Muslim and in our Quran it’s stated that no other religious book is in its original form except Quran. Because god saw people changing the holy book so he took over the protection of Quran. It’s still unchanged

  • @TheEranTalmor
    @TheEranTalmor Год назад

    This is epic!

  • @jol284
    @jol284 2 года назад

    And get a spider stoned...you watch that little thing lay down and chill lol

  • @mchoffner8497
    @mchoffner8497 3 года назад +16

    How dare he question the Holy Babble? All he has is facts.

    • @mchoffner8497
      @mchoffner8497 3 года назад +2

      @@mackdaddy798ishkabibble

    • @saarza9991
      @saarza9991 Год назад

      @@mackdaddy798 daddy? Where were u? I'm pregnant. It's yours. Bring the priest along. He misused me

  • @Blynded
    @Blynded 2 года назад +3

    God: Hmmm... GENOCIDE, what a perfect solution.

    • @Doc-Holliday1851
      @Doc-Holliday1851 2 года назад +1

      If your program isn't functioning properly, you save what parts of the code you can and ditch the rest.

    • @johndeoliveira8476
      @johndeoliveira8476 2 года назад

      Isn’t that what we supposed to do when people do evil ?

  • @darlingtonjonesimagery9247
    @darlingtonjonesimagery9247 Год назад +2

    Where's the rest? Quite funny bit

  • @woodycfc711
    @woodycfc711 Год назад

    I love this guy

  • @barakaali4068
    @barakaali4068 3 года назад +7

    😂😂❤️

  • @martdod
    @martdod 2 года назад +30

    Many of us believe in God until we reach the age of reason, Ricky reached that age at 8. 😂

    • @mavis3916
      @mavis3916 2 года назад

      Not a fact, just your opinion

    • @roems6396
      @roems6396 2 года назад +10

      @@mavis3916 yeah, he should have said, “Logical people believe in god until they reach the age of reason”. That’s more of a fact.

    • @chkngrl
      @chkngrl Год назад +4

      @@mavis3916 you just haven't reached the age of reason then.

    • @mavis3916
      @mavis3916 Год назад

      @@chkngrl what is the age of reason?

    • @saarza9991
      @saarza9991 Год назад +1

      @@mavis3916 it is when you understand that not all people have same beliefs, however idiotic they may seem

  • @gbuddy80
    @gbuddy80 Год назад

    Business phrase "pay me to save your life"😂

  • @twowheelpilot
    @twowheelpilot 2 года назад +2

    Gold Gold Gold

  • @boxculture
    @boxculture Год назад +6

    This is Gervais at his best. Not moaning about Twitter

  • @kevenlawson7600
    @kevenlawson7600 2 года назад +55

    Is now a good time to mention the incest that happened in the story of Noah?

    • @IsaacWale2004
      @IsaacWale2004 2 года назад +6

      Yes. He allegedly only bought his family with him... and chances are, the only animals he brought with were a few cats, dogs, and maybe a few other wild animals which he likely put in a cage aboard the boat (which was probably not as big as they say it is)

    • @eduardochavacano
      @eduardochavacano 2 года назад +8

      What about beastiality?

    • @gango23
      @gango23 2 года назад +7

      My favourite part,which for some reason never mentioned at school when they tried to convince me this is true, is that Noah was 500 years old when God ask him to build the ark. He lived to be 950 apparently!

    • @rabokarabekian409
      @rabokarabekian409 2 года назад

      Well it worked well that first time, din'it?
      Righteous Lot"s daughters were certainly inspired by it n' all.
      The eternal LORD did rule incest right out when he gave hundreds of rules to Moses, so well, you know....progressive revelation and all that lot.

    • @ibizenco
      @ibizenco 2 года назад

      @@eduardochavacano Actually, this may make sense, when you see what kind of animals some are...

  • @slobodandjurdjevic5607
    @slobodandjurdjevic5607 Год назад

    Dear God that was super funny.

  • @barrymitchell6444
    @barrymitchell6444 6 месяцев назад +2

    Why would any god make 37,000 species of spiders? Or even 37 species of spiders? Says it all.

  • @EA-js1me
    @EA-js1me Год назад +3

    God is so deep in the closet that he is also in Narnia.

  • @lh1673
    @lh1673 2 года назад +6

    I rather hear his funny talks than attending church in Sunday.

    • @josephwells8699
      @josephwells8699 Год назад

      Well if you attended church on Sunday thinking it was God's Sabbath, you would be there on the wrong day, because Saturday (the seventh day) is God's true Sabbath. Thought I would point that out in case you did decide to go to church. Always willing to help.

  • @truthtellerlastonk.m.p4985
    @truthtellerlastonk.m.p4985 3 месяца назад

    Best 😂😂😅

  • @Henrikbuitenhuis
    @Henrikbuitenhuis 2 года назад

    Lol lol lol lol
    I wish you All the best.

  • @carolking6355
    @carolking6355 2 года назад +19

    I’ve had a dreadful night and dearest Ricky I knew would cheer me up. I wonder if he knows how much good he does in the world. I am a Christian but Ricky is here and making me laugh while I am slowly dying. Whatever Ricky thinks God must adore him for keeping our spirits up.❤️🌈🥰

    • @michaelparker6763
      @michaelparker6763 2 года назад

      @@mavis3916 Really?

    • @harrywaters7718
      @harrywaters7718 2 года назад

      Either Ricky’s atheist evangelism is him selling his soul to the devil (he was an overnight success in middle age after being an unknown loser for decades), or he’ll do a massive conversion like CS Lewis or Jordan Peterson etc

    • @Borishal
      @Borishal Год назад +1

      Nah, mate. Wishful thinking.

    • @Borishal
      @Borishal Год назад +4

      @Aidan m justifying torture.

    • @Borishal
      @Borishal Год назад +6

      @Aidan m I was a dedicated Christian for 18 years, yes, and accepted Jesus as my personal saviour. It is all total rubbish. The Bible, God, and faith. I made excuses for them, but the foul basis for all three became evident and I renounced the church, the propaganda that promotes it and the falsehoods that form its basis. That was many years ago and I have been much better off spiritually, mentally and emotionally.
      So please don't preach to me.

  • @sarge420
    @sarge420 2 года назад +8

    I found on Google that God lives actually two houses down from Santa & the Easter Bunny...

  • @UniDocs_Mahapushpa_Cyavana
    @UniDocs_Mahapushpa_Cyavana Год назад

    Don't forget the Gopher bird. Not apparent in translations, but pretty funny.

  • @WormWorld94
    @WormWorld94 2 года назад +1

    What a genius 😆

  • @dariuscroxton1039
    @dariuscroxton1039 2 года назад +7

    Thank god for this man.

    • @late8641
      @late8641 2 года назад +5

      Pun intended, I guess

    • @nag0074
      @nag0074 Год назад

      @@late8641 irony intended

  • @TheShortie35
    @TheShortie35 3 года назад +54

    rickey is the only comedian I would class as a true philosopher

    • @NewFalconerRecords
      @NewFalconerRecords 2 года назад +9

      Check out George Carlin. He was the originator.

    • @ThePoliticrat
      @ThePoliticrat 2 года назад +3

      George Carlin?

    • @robertkelly9772
      @robertkelly9772 2 года назад +1

      Don't forget Billy Hicks...and "God" took Hicks away from us way too early.

    • @anierrn6935
      @anierrn6935 2 года назад +2

      Well he does have a degree in philosophy

    • @joelmacinnes2391
      @joelmacinnes2391 Год назад

      What about Billy Connolly

  • @NileSWPhotography
    @NileSWPhotography 2 года назад +1

    The little side comments 😂😂 “arrogant”

  • @tillerman7272
    @tillerman7272 2 года назад

    "It sounded like he was gay"
    'He's not gay!"

  • @yannicknaert
    @yannicknaert 3 года назад +11

    And God said "i am so angry with men".

    • @weemac4645
      @weemac4645 2 года назад

      And God said ...................................................... .

  • @arkdark5554
    @arkdark5554 2 года назад +9

    Yeah, just like that.
    In fact there’s no better source than religion…when it comes to comedy.

  • @PREPFORIT
    @PREPFORIT 2 года назад +2

    Fuc god this is funny!

  • @billtodd999
    @billtodd999 2 года назад

    a very good listen