HOW I FACED MY WORST ENEMY & WON | WHY I'VE REALLY BEEN GONE SO LONG
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- Опубликовано: 28 июл 2018
- Hey Sistas! I've been gone for a while dealing with some heavy issues and how I overcame some of my biggest fears, but I'm glad to be back and have the opportunity to share with Olay today.
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Хобби
First off, you look absolutely gorgeous. Second, I love your message. Third, you’re such a phenomenal mom and a strong woman. Last, but certainly not least, I love you to infinity and beyond 💫...and I will ALWAYS be here for you. ❤️
Thank you my Love Muffin!!! I am also so very proud of you and witnessing your growth has been so inspiring! Love you more than you’ll ever know! ❤️
❤️big sissss! You said nothing but the truth , very impactful words, and your so brave to overcome yourself and the negative outsides sources! I love you!
Baby Sissss!!! Thanks my love!!! Love you, love you, love you so much!!!❤️😘
We as black women need to recognize the need to seek therapy. Wearing a mask is NOT and does NOT make the issue disappear. It is ok for us to not be strong... yes we are black women, but we are also human beings with feelings and emotions. Seeking outside influences (and NO a friend is not an outside influence) to point out the who, what, where, why and how is soooooooo beneficial. Someone who is non-judgmental and neutral. THERAPY black women!!! It is such a necessity in a world full of superficialness and hatred.
I see the difference in this woman's face. In her voice. In her demeanor. Thank you India, for being so transparent and open about this. Hopefully it will change the dialogue on seeking mental health help. You're amazing!!!
Just wanna add that I, too, went thru therapy and learned about my ego. I've learned how carrying "baggage" truly influences choices and decisions. I've learned to forgive and let go. And I've learned to love-- and be friendly to myself first before I can be friendly to anyone else. I thank my therapist for being that guiding voice and light in a sea of negativity that lived inside my head.
Be well all.
You hit the nail of my conviction right on the head because I was just about to say while reading this: "Well, I'm at least telling my best friend how I feel now"
Thank you for this
ALL 👏🏾 OF 👏🏾 THIS 👏🏾 !!! I was just discussing the Ego and how it gets in our way the other day! Thanks so much for sharing your wisdom with us, Sis! And thanks for recognizing the change, I literally feel the change!
NEEDED THIS!!!
@Drink me Fabulous because people have been taught for centuries that black people, among other things, feel no pain, are emotionless beings with mystical powers. I've seen physicians NOT give black men and women pain meds post surgery because of this myth!!! Look up eugenics... this is what whites are told about us.
You are not alone. I took off my cape recently. I had to accept that I could not longer do it all.
Transparency is much needed for and within our community. Yours is priceless. Thanks so much for your willingness to share to help others!
Thank you! And I agree, it is much needed!
Women NEED to hear this. I NEEDED to hear this. Thank you for your transparency. I was just having a convo with my best friend about Self Love. Looking within is key!
I wore the mask of shame, feeling unnecessary, unloved, uninspired and unworthy and I chose to avoid negative emotions and to be a pleaser to try to cope with things. Last year I had one of my worst car accidents yet with all 3 of my children in the car, went through a divorce, found out I have narcolepsy and finally had an amazing, scary, powerful awakening. And... It was the hardest and best thing I've ever been through! There is NO award for being a superwoman, actually the reward is heartache, pain, mental, physical and spiritual bondage! Thank you for sharing, it's very very brave! Continue to be compassionate and kind to yourself 1st and share your truth. Many blessings on you sis! I'd love to know how you manage something like this and sustain a marriage, not to get in your business but it might be something others can be inspired and encouraged by. Therapy, reading, sharing, listening, connecting with a tribe of caring, genuine sisters and stillness has been an integral part of my healing as well.
Sister, there's only 1 you...and only you can live at peace in that body...and sometimes we have to work to get there. We can't condemn us for realizing we got some stuff to do.
But seems like you're getting it together...that's what strong women do!
Nice to see you. : )
Thank you for being vulnerable and sharing your story. You are empowering so many women to find help and heal from their experiences. The saddest thing is that so many women suffer alone because of the fear of judgment. It sounds like you're healing and thriving. Know your bravery is appreciated :)
I really appreciate how you discussed the different types of women like not everyone wants to be a mom, or not every mom can make or wants to make the same choices as others. This was a really thoughtful and helpful video.
I cried all the way through this video because you touched a very scary topic that myself any many others experience. I pray for our strength ❤️
I’m sorry we invalidated your trauma. I have missed you so much you’re my favorite sister. I hope we can make social media a better place.
You are not the only one dealing with all the things you listed in this video. I feel like your inside my head. I needed to hear this!
You spoke to my soul, I can't stop crying for you and myself, you are a light in a dark world for speaking the truth that so many women deal with within themselves thank you for being brave , I love you and continue progressing
It truly is an ongoing battle. Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it. We as people need to stop having preconceived notions on what we are supposed to be at different stages of our lives and a lot of the times we stress and over obsess on why we are not there and what we are doing wrong that we forget to actually enjoy the journey on getting to where we need. Some of the hardest things to overcome is to stop treating life like it's some sort of race or competition because when you do that you skip some of the best parts at least that's what I learned. Thank you so much for sharing.
The Truth! 🙌🏾
cjckennedy thank you for your post! I have lived this way for so long just now overcoming this way of thinking, being and living. Your post serves as a reminder to keep moving forward in my plight and where God is taking me😘
Well said!!!! Thank you!
India! This is right on time for me! I was just meditating on my self love today. I was thinking about a talk I was having with a mentor about thankfulness, acceptance and contentment. I never felt peace. After many sessions of meditation I just could never seem to find it. I started thinking about acceptance and the thought of allowing things to "be". To welcome the events that occur to not fight them but to move with them to accept them. The thought of this at one time gave me ANXIETY! I realized that I had a serious issue with contentment. I couldn't deal with the thought of letting things "be" without doing something. I realized that maybe I didn't know what contentment really was... Maybe it's simply being thankful for what "is". The thought of this allowed me to have acceptance of love ( because I couldn't at one time from myself or anyone else) information, wisdom or other gifts . Without guilt, judgements, returns or questions of value or worth. Being able to understand contentment and acceptance through being thankful has finally brought me peace. I hope you find it as well! Namaste sistas.
Yes!!! Thank you so much for sharing this!!! The peace I’ve found ... Sis! Like you said, I never felt peace until I truly accepted myself and life as it was. I may not be able to work on or change the people or situations that surround me, but I CAN work on myself. So much more gratitude for the simple things in life and focusing my energy on what truly matters. Much Love to you, Sis! ❤️
Thank you for your story. The myth of being a "strong black woman" is silencing our hurting, emotions, etc and killing us. Im learning to accept being vulnerable and to seek help (therapy). Thanks again 🙌🏿❤
Omg I'm going through the exact same thing right now sis, hang in there, there are better days than others but when its bad its bad. I haven't seen professional help but I did just recently discover what what problems are, and most of them are because of my childhood. It's scary and hard to deal with but i'm glad you were BRAVE ENOUGH TO SHARE THIS AND HELP OTHER WOMAN. MUCH LOVE.
Thank you for being so brave and sharing with us.
Listening to you I was like:
Traumatized from a car accident ✔️
Because my injuries aren’t visible my friends say, “Oh she’s ok” Irks my life because I do have a permanent spinal injury and I’m in pain everyday ✔️
I loss my husband 13 years ago and I should be over it✔️
The whole time we were married (12 1/2 yrs) we tried to conceive unsuccessfully. Then I get the, “why don’t you have kids?”✔️
You’re especially right when you say we put in a smile and a pretty appearance but for me crying on the inside. I found myself taking care of everyone else and people who I helped repeatedly weren’t there for me Soo.... this year I decided to fall all the way back. Put myself first a little and it feel GOOD!!!!
So I give it to you for all you been thru and finding that light at the end of the tunnel. Congratulations 💙🦋👶🏻 on baby Phoenix!!!
I can relate to this on so many fronts! Let's start with the most important part: I too almost lost my son.
My best friend and I were pregnant at the same time and due 10 days apart. She went in 5 days overdue and I was honestly just curious to see where I was since the doctor hadn't measured me in a while. Went to the ER, told them I'd been having mild contractions (true) and they checked me in for observation. Turns out I was in active labor (who knew)! They hooked me up to everything and about 4 hours later something started beeping and everyone went crazy. They were all talking to each other but no one was speaking to me at all, they were busy rushing me into the OR. I finally caught someone's attention enough to ask what was going on b/c I couldn't get enough info while they were yelling at each other and it was just a cacophony of voices. A nurse finally told me his heart rate was around 40 and dropping quickly so they were going to give me a C-Section. There was an anesthesiologist to the right of my head that was pushing meds when I decided to ask if I could try pushing. They literally all stopped, doctors, nurses and anyone else in the room, looked at each other and the doctor finally decided I could try. 10 minutes later my son was born, a little blue with the cord wrapped around his neck twice. He's now 9 and consistently the brightest boy in his class! God is so good!
I was recently diagnosed with major depressive disorder as well as a mood disorder. Mental health is so taboo in the African American community and for so long I resisted getting help but no more. I feel better. I like feeling better. I'm glad you got help. 🖤
This was very brave of you.
You have been truly missed. Glad your doing the work to get better. God bless! 😊
I too, was in a few car accidents. The last was when I was 5 months pregnant. My son side was hit by a bus, the impact busted the windows out ....the car spinned around almost the opposite direction. Thank God .....the baby was fine... my son didn't have one scratch or glass found in his skin or eyes. My daughter turned 11 yesterday. My son is now in college. Life can have a way to get to you. Glad you are healing and recovering !👍
Tawana Martin that must have been really painful and traumatizing
chelsie romero It was it took me 2 months to drive again....I know what she means....
Tawana Martin Thank God your son was unharmed. We were rear-ended by a drunk driver when my son was 6 months old. He was unharmed as well. I had a lot of pain and soreness but I was okay. But, I was a wreck emotionally and experienced anxiety while driving for months. I still
A
It's a work in progress for our entire lives! The work is never done but once the self inquiry journey starts it is so beautiful! Great video❤
This was on point. While I've missed your presence on YT I'm so happy that you took this time out for yourself. I appreciate you sharing this video because this is the kind of thing that let's people know that they are NOT alone in their feelings. There IS someone who can relate. I believe that your transparency can and WILL most definitely save a life. Thank you!
So happy for you and thank you so much for sharing your story. It wasn't an accident that I ended up watching this today. I really needed it. Thanks again!
I truly love this video and you. I love your sisters as well. Thank you for being so transparent. Mental health is not something that is talked about enough in the African American culture. I have also battled with not loving myself through a broken marriage, being a single mother, and other issues. Therapy is a must for me.
Thank you for sharing, when you said, “there’s a light at the end of the tunnel,” I felt that.
Thank you for openess, honesty and vulnerability. It touched me that you were brave enough to share your heart on this platform. 💜🙏🏾
This video came right on time 🙌🏾. Thank you so much for sharing your experiences with us. I can definitely relate to a lot of what you said and I’m sure many other women will too. You’ve helped us more than you’ll ever know.
Thank you!!! And I’m so glad this helped. ❤️
Holy shit - you just put a label to something I didn’t even realize I was experiencing. Thank you for sharing your story! 🙏🏾
This was one of the most beautiful and transparent videos that I have watched. You will/are helping so many people with this video. Shoot you're helping me come to a realization that I had PTSD after having my son, and it's been 19 yrs since I had him. In the beginning I couldn't talk about his coming into the world w/o crying. A woman's/ mother's intuition is never wrong and we should never ignore it.
I gained 5lbs from one Tuesday appt to the next at 35 weeks, when I had plateaued at a 25 lbs weight gain for my entire pregnancy. My blood pressure was high(when it never has been) and I was sent home on bed rest for the next 2 days and a jug to collect urine for protein. I took it back on that Thursday gave it to the lab, something said before you leave get them to check your bp to see if it's gone down. It was even higher, they put me in a quiet dimly lit room for some time, came back it was even higher. They called my doctor and long story short I was given the urine back and sent to L&D where I ended up having an emergency C-section for mine and the baby's safety(I was going to be 36 wks the next day). My son came out blue, not breathing, and almost died and transferred to another hospital's NICU. He was in the hospital 4 days shy of a month. He does now have Mild Intellectual Disability and on the Autism Spectrum, however, he can communicate and do for himself. But my husband and I will take ALL of what comes with him and thankful I followed my intuition because had I just gone home we both could have died. So you aren't alone in your feelings. Tfs
trishalachell God is good!! Your story is indeed a testimony!
Wow i needed to read this. I had eclampsia with my baby girl almost a year ago november 5th. I had all the signs of preeclampsia but wasn't diagnosed. I had 4 seizures and had an emergency c-section at 34weeks.
Bless you. I am going through it now. I’ve always struggled with depression.
I have high and lows but it seems as if my lows are getting dangerous. Thank you for sharing.
God bless hun. To look within and be transparent with oneself is the starting point for growth of character. I remember when I had that moment like you and took the steps to healing. I’m still on that journey.
Thank you for this video! It is always comforting to know that we are not alone in our struggles.
This is so real. The post pet period can be soooo lonely. Thank you for sharing❤️A LOT of women need to hear this
We hold so much, so glad you got help and shared this. “Have mercy on yourself” needed this❤️
Wow!! Thanks so much for sharing something so personal. I always tell people “You never know what someone is going through”. Just because a person smiles 😊 and seems to be happy 😃 doesn’t mean they are not going through anything.
I love you and your honesty! We’re your family and will always be there for you no matter how often you’re here and how long it takes if you take a break 💕 😘
I love y’all sooooo much!!! Thank you!!!
Sending love sis ive went threw something similar with both kids!!! Post parturm depression is real! Child birth, pregnancy traumas,and abusive and toxic relationships alot to take on. Healing is part of the process one day at a time self care and love💜💜💜💜
It sure is! And thanks for sharing, Sis! We def need to have more open discussions about this.
Post Partum Depression is so real. My daughter is almost ten and I am finally comfortable with talking to people about it, especially other new moms so they don’t feel alone like I did. I felt ashamed not being happy after giving birth to a healthy baby. Thanks for sharing India! 💕
You're so beautiful sis. Thank you for the transparency. God bless you and your family. I'm praying for you all!
God bless you sista. As black women, we tend to take on so much and never take the time to actually breathe. One thing I’ve learned is that you can’t love with an empty cup. Thank you for sharing your story.
Everybody thinks black women are strong and can take anything SO they throw a lot at us. In truth, we’re not stronger than anyone per se, we just have a fear of reaching out for help.
I just want to say THANK YOU. Just thank you so much from the bottom of my heart for putting this out there 💜
I’m so proud of you and thank you so much. I’m glad you sought out the help you needed to fell better for yourself!!!
Thank you so much for making this! I've been following you and your sisters for almost 10 years, I was a freshman in college and baby natural :) and wow, I feel like I've grown with yall. Thank you. Keep being real with us, it's greatly appreciated and we're all doing this healing work together.
Omg! Thank you so much. I think I may have PTSD. I had a child to pass away and thought everything was ok. Looking back, now I think I might know why my stress levels are extremely high...high enough to make me physically ill most times.
felicia b First: Baruch Dayan emet! Well yeah you’re stressed, and with excellent reason, as you lost an entire child. PTSD is entirely within the realm of possibility after such a traumatic event. Please accept my sincerest sympathies on your loss. I hope that you can locate a good counselor in your area. Many insurance companies will actually cover grief counseling, so do please look into the services and get yourself onto the path of healing. Much love to you and your family.
Mimi Nwabuoku Thank you so much. Getting help is my goal now. I will be calling my insurance asap.
Thank you for being so transparent! I needed to hear your story more than you could ever know!
Thank you for this. I wish you and your family nothing but the best 💖
Wow.....thank you for sharing and being so transparent! So many women needed to hear this!
So many women go through this and suffer in silence. Thank you for sharing.
Thank you for sharing what thousands (if not more) of people are going through everyday, but no one says anything out loud. I have gone through the same thing and had to reach out for help. I’m glad I did, because keeping silent almost silenced me forever.... but GOD!!!!
May you and yours forever be blessed!
Thank you for being so fearless to share your story.
This is so true: PTSD is real. After surviving a 7 year "relationship" with a narcissist pervert, I was told that "now it's over, move on and forget about it" or "pray your depression away". 8 years later, I've realized that I was in much needed rehabilitation treatment,... always listen to your gut feeling and get the help needed. Thank you for your openness Sis, you're doing a lot of good by being honest. God bless!
Thank you for making this video! Much of what you mentioned, are battles I have been facing for so many years. I'm finally starting the journey of allowing myself to say "no more" to being silent. Talking about it and sharing with others is liberating for self and helpful for others. Thank you!
I can’t love and share this fast enough! Thank you, glad you are doing better 💜
This was amazing and on point. Exactly what women need to hear!
Thank you so much. I needed to hear this. I have felt like something is wrong with me. I feel inadequate and sad and scared. But the worst is i cant put my finger on it. I've thought about counseling and that scares me. Idk, im a mess but im not going to stop til i figure it out.
Thank you for sharing!! Sometimes our bodies go in survival mode without us knowing. It is an amazing blessing!
This conversation is much needed ❤️
So happy for you!! Much needed, thank you for this. As always you look beautifuuul.
That is so true India when you said “so many people would rather hide behind a mask their entire lives.” Transparency can be hard but it’s necessary for self-healing and to help others heal. Thank you for sharing and encouraging.
When I tell you this video was everything!!!!! Thank you for laying your soul bare! Your openness was so refreshing and much needed! 🤗🤗🤗
A beautiful message. We miss you and Im so glad you’ve gone through that journey of self-love ❤️❤️❤️❤️
Love, Love, LOVE and NEEDED this video!!!! Thank you for sharing, and for being transparent. You are not alone sis!!!! Much love and light to you and your family!!! ❤❤❤
Thank you for being transparent. I needed to hear this. I’m working on forgiving myself and not being so hard on myself.
You are beautiful! This is a beautiful testimony!! Thank you for sharing your heart ❤️
Your liberation has you glowing! Glad you were able to be fearless!
So happy your shared your journey! It has helped me already. Great to see you again.
Bravo to you for being this transparent about your experiences and for shining a light on how hard it is be us. The pressures of life are intense. I am so glad you stopped to acknowledge what was happening on the inside. Great word.
I can’t stop crying while watching. This is my everyday life man. I’m trying my best but it’s hard.
I love your truth!!!!!!! We women carry the world on our shoulders. I’ve been though so much in my life and had to come to terms with a lot of the fears that held me down. 3 miscarriages and now a wonderful 5 year old with Special Needs who just starting speaking this year, has made me realize more that I need to take care of me first to be there for him. I’m loyal to a fault and push myself so hard. With a crazy schedule I have, teacher, mom, daughter, college student, yada, yada, yada... I ended up having a heart attack this past December and was hospitalized for 4 days. I so empathize with your story. This is my first public post. I NEVER post anything as I’m a VERY private person and give my testimony when I’m led. I felt led hearing your story. Not on any social media at all, but I just had to hear your story. Your truthful, and I can appreciate truth when I see it. No shame by the way being in therapy. The black community has this unspoken stigma of people having therapy. They way I see it, “if it’s broken, it needs fixing”. Many of our emotions and experiences can do that to our psychological state which affects all aspects of our Mind, Body and Spirit!
Once again, love your truth!!!!
Thank you so much for sharing this. This was right on time for me. Kudos to you for doing the ultimate self care and taking steps to get stronger for yourself and your family!
Thank you for your transparency. I just want to send you a bunch of hugs, love. Truly, your journey you've shared has been phenomenal. Fight the good fight and don't give up💙💙💙💙💙
I am sooo proud of what you put here on your platform! YOU just saved someone's LIFE!!! WE LOVE YOU!
Needed to hear this. So glad you’re doing better. Too many of us are suffering silently.
Thank you for sharing this, I’m no stranger to therapy, but recently after feelings of anxiety and depression came back- I realized it’s time to go back. Made the call and starting again next week.
Thank you for this video! You made me cry because I am in that SPOT! I needed this. Love your hair also
So happy and proud of you for sharing your truth with us!!
I have always appreciated your open and genuineness. Thank you for this message of encouragement and bravery. You are such a beautiful person with an enormous shining spirit. Don't stop being you!! I love you sis, I identify, and you're in my heart.
LOVE YOUR TRANSPARENCY!!! God bless you sis
Thank you those encouraging words, a lot of us needed to hear it. I’m working on myself and finding self love ❤️
Wishing you all the best!!!! I totally and completely agree that we have to look within in order to heal... appreciate your transparency!!!!
Kudos to you and being transparent. You are beautiful, amazing, and fierce!
Love that you shared! Great reminder and added reassurance that self care is so essential as well as self worth, love and appreciation . ❤️
Thanks for the courage to share your truth. I'm pleased to see you back and happy your mental and physical health are optimal
Thank you India for being so transparent and reminding me that seeking help doesn’t make me weak but human.
This was/is beautiful! Thank you for being so thoughtful and including all women and the different circumstance we may find ourselves in. You are beautiful and courageous, thank you so much!💜💙💚💛❤️
Kudos to you for being so brave, open and honest. Thank you for sharing your story with us. I'm sure that there are so many women who can relate. I AM one of them. 💛
Thank you for sharing your story. So many people deal with what you went through and I appreciate you being forthcoming for many other women who may be going through similar situations. God bless you!
O-M-G!!! I just posted this exact message on my FB page yesterday!!! Except on a spiritual level with a new commitment to my faith. Wow that's crazy!
I'm so glad you were able to see yourself and work toward your healing. Congrats Sista!!! Major Achievement. Keep inspiring others! 💖😊💖😊💖
You look so awesome! Thank you for sharing this message. I appreciate you! You are doing amazing and I am so happy that you are working through your pain. Keep your head up!
You are so right. A cancer diagnosis woke me up. Woke me right up! I’m in the process of overhauling every part of me. It will take time but I am doing it. Great video.
I’m soooooo proud of you for doin this video! I don’t know u personally but u and ur sisters are wonderful women! I’ve been through a lot and this video is sooooo relatable, we luv u sista!
Thank you so much for sharing. For being you and speaking about the good, the bad, and the scary 💛
You are speaking volumes i need to hear this advice. im so happy that you decided to put yourself first an overcome you obstacles and tell your truth.
India!!! Thanks for sharing your journey on self acceptance and being vulnerable. I too can relate to being in a state of self rejection and constantly seeking validation from others. I appreciate you and I've always considered you a beautiful kindred sista. Much Love to you! We will get thru it!! ~Agnew~
Hey!!!! We can and will get through this! Thank you for all of your support over the years! Sending my Love, Light ✨, and Blessings 🤗
Sis, thank you so much for telling us what we needed to hear. Depression stopped me to the point where I just left my YT channel for 5 years. I thought I wasn't good enough as far as being a makeup artist for 19 years. I suffered in silence. My family didn't understand nor wanted to support my dreams. The depression was strong after I lost my daughter through a miscarriage 20 years ago and I never fully recovered. Thankfully my husband now of 17 years has been the ONE person who has helped me heal just by being there and listening without judgement. I love you SIS! I'm proud of you too!
Beautifully spoken.
Thank you for filming this transparent video for us. I know you’ve definitely helped me and other subscribers identify some of the same underlying sign that we as women constantly overlook. I wish peace, love, joy and bottomless blessings to you and you family 🙏🏾
Thank you thank you!! I just looked at myself in the mirror and said who are you ? Having 2 boys 13months apart and getting married kinda made me feel like I’ve lost myself. Like I’ve lost my identity I don’t feel like I’m depressed or anything but I defiantly feel like I’m lost and I definitely need to hear this. I need to find myself within myself. I need to stop worrying about what other people think and there opinions. Thank you I look forward to more videos and welcome back 💃🏾
Priin Jones 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾 same here!!!