Lee Asks How Dealers Hide Money | Joey Diaz

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  • Опубликовано: 13 янв 2025

Комментарии • 1,8 тыс.

  • @ChokeSerenity
    @ChokeSerenity 5 лет назад +7886

    When uncle Joey takes that sip of water and starts with 1980.... you know some knowledge will follow.

    • @boofert.washington2499
      @boofert.washington2499 5 лет назад +99

      Knowledge, bullshit....it's the same thing.

    • @danielbyal4440
      @danielbyal4440 5 лет назад +48

      @@boofert.washington2499 fuck if its bullshit, its probably not but say it is. its still entertaining

    • @slimthizzle11
      @slimthizzle11 5 лет назад +10

      I swear I said that same shit to myself 😂😂😂

    • @xxxs8309
      @xxxs8309 5 лет назад +1

      Lol

    • @mymusic5053
      @mymusic5053 5 лет назад +1

      🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @dougstanhope7774
    @dougstanhope7774 5 лет назад +1403

    The look of happiness on Lee’s face when Joey said he’d hide his coke money at Lee’s place was priceless 😂

    • @shellytanski4281
      @shellytanski4281 5 лет назад +41

      5:30 *Really*

    • @postersandstuff
      @postersandstuff 5 лет назад +12

      I have coke money too (from Coke soda bottle refund deposits lol ;)

    • @postersandstuff
      @postersandstuff 5 лет назад +12

      In Scandinavia and Germany they give you money back for empty soda bottles btw

    • @KB-pd9yh
      @KB-pd9yh 4 года назад +1

      He was considering it

    • @Whocares-z6v
      @Whocares-z6v 4 года назад +2

      you would have thought his girl friend told him he had a big pecker..."Really? 🤩"

  • @sevnteen8364
    @sevnteen8364 5 лет назад +3623

    I could listen to Joey snore and I would feel like I was in the 80s

  • @7gangstaboy
    @7gangstaboy 5 лет назад +7849

    Joe Rogan looks different in this vid

    • @samherron4135
      @samherron4135 5 лет назад +121

      7gangstaboy underrated reply

    • @Spookyduke1
      @Spookyduke1 5 лет назад +29

      Lol

    • @wailandkarisma4279
      @wailandkarisma4279 5 лет назад +358

      In this alternate dimension joe Rogan took accounting instead of taekwondo.

    • @masavoy0228
      @masavoy0228 5 лет назад +14

      🤣🤣🤣

    • @TheRealAVTV
      @TheRealAVTV 5 лет назад +38

      as I read this, I scrolled up to check at 0:42 hahahahahaha

  • @larrytran8972
    @larrytran8972 5 лет назад +2063

    I love how Lee has zero street knowledge. He so pure and innocent 😂

    • @maximus6236
      @maximus6236 5 лет назад +216

      Larry Tran this is what makes this podcast great. Lee not knowing about the street is why joey diaz shares so much knowledge and experiences

    • @harristech6807
      @harristech6807 5 лет назад +9

      Lolol ikr he is a funny ass character!

    • @211rams
      @211rams 5 лет назад +59

      Yea and all the wannabe gangsters in the comments to haha

    • @Sneak248
      @Sneak248 5 лет назад +71

      ROTARYK1NG You don’t gotta be gangsta to be street smart.

    • @Growdankmeds
      @Growdankmeds 5 лет назад +1

      Bubble wrapped and still lives with mummy at 40

  • @fleadoggreen9062
    @fleadoggreen9062 5 лет назад +1431

    Lee starts dealing,gets busted first day

    • @someoneiknow6632
      @someoneiknow6632 5 лет назад +38

      Fleadog Green then snitches

    • @keithstyers4678
      @keithstyers4678 5 лет назад +43

      His first customer would be a narc!!! He'd be in Singsing forever!!!

    • @LesRed
      @LesRed 4 года назад +40

      Fleadog Green: Nah he won’t even get to start dealing cause the plug will rob him😆

    • @bigmeme8266
      @bigmeme8266 4 года назад +4

      @@LesRed this 😭

    • @someoneiknow6632
      @someoneiknow6632 4 года назад +49

      Lee type of guy to fill out a resume to start dealing drugs.

  • @eddiewisnowski9325
    @eddiewisnowski9325 5 лет назад +1873

    You could literally make a movie of Joey Diaz giving Lee coke money to hold on too... then Lee throws a little party that somehow turns into a huge banger and the next day the money is missing ... Then Lee goes on a crazy adventure trying to get the money back before Joey finds out lol

    • @fitzchivalryfarseer313
      @fitzchivalryfarseer313 5 лет назад +62

      Eddie Wisnowski or he and Joey go on a comedic adventure to find it.

    • @Jbk4real
      @Jbk4real 5 лет назад +21

      A banger you fucking dork, let me guess you will bring your own spray cheese

    • @josephbainton3198
      @josephbainton3198 5 лет назад +10

      John Kyle ?

    • @Jbk4real
      @Jbk4real 5 лет назад +1

      @@josephbainton3198 ??

    • @TheNumbasign2
      @TheNumbasign2 5 лет назад +7

      Joey is on an episode of scste tactics. With a kind of similar plot. A kid shorts his money 10k. The shit is hilarious.

  • @MattK-HiLL
    @MattK-HiLL 5 лет назад +209

    I love how Joey holds the pen while he's talking like he's taking notes

    • @toad3222
      @toad3222 4 года назад +21

      He's writing down years and numbers and stuff so he can calculate things easier

    • @nickyhustle
      @nickyhustle 4 года назад

      Hahaha that’s a funny mannerism

    • @pickelsvx
      @pickelsvx 4 года назад +3

      @@toad3222 Makes sense, he always was a numbers guy.

    • @rileyblack5621
      @rileyblack5621 2 года назад +3

      I want to see one of the papers after a podcast. It would be filled with numbers like a wartime letter written in a code 😂😂

    • @MrJungle123
      @MrJungle123 2 года назад

      @@pickelsvx how the fuck do you know?

  • @srgt.stones8627
    @srgt.stones8627 5 лет назад +571

    Love a good dose of Uncle Joey when im startin to fall off track. Keep on Livin like a doctah.

    • @Deadlyaztec27
      @Deadlyaztec27 5 лет назад +15

      Yep, he's my social and economic compass. When things are going bad, even in the worst of times, he reminds me that while life has its dips it has its rises and that things *will* get better.
      Thanks Uncle Joey, for everything.

    • @twotonetonybaloney9963
      @twotonetonybaloney9963 4 года назад

      Who doesnt cocksuckaa

  • @erichkiparski314
    @erichkiparski314 5 лет назад +491

    0:47 The way Joey drinks his water got me rollin this morning.... with the pinky and the eyebrows!

    • @everythingfunny4725
      @everythingfunny4725 5 лет назад +40

      Like a fuckin' DOCTAH!

    • @MichaelIGDE
      @MichaelIGDE 5 лет назад +3

      Rocko 333 IM fucking dead son

    • @jonrivere424
      @jonrivere424 5 лет назад +9

      Well endowed pinky out

    • @AcidAroma
      @AcidAroma 5 лет назад +9

      Such a fucking gentleman

    • @Nswix
      @Nswix 5 лет назад +13

      In Renaissance France when the aristocracy would get together they'd all end up fucking. If you put your pinky up while drinking it signified that you had syphilis, as a courtesy for those that didn't.

  • @jelanireid397
    @jelanireid397 4 года назад +249

    Joey Diaz teaches his daughter math using coke deal scenarios

    • @RJ-wx3fh
      @RJ-wx3fh 3 года назад +2

      Wkuk did a skit parodying kindergarten cop with convicts, the prison math is quite amusing 'so if I have 2 packs of Newports....'

    • @evilgenius7937
      @evilgenius7937 3 года назад +3

      You owe 2 wise guys 30,000 you have 10,000 how much bullets do you need

    • @professordick4868
      @professordick4868 10 месяцев назад

      😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

  • @logankanekoa4428
    @logankanekoa4428 4 года назад +472

    Lees the typa guy who would squeal if you shake his hand too hard

  • @gregzy1471
    @gregzy1471 5 лет назад +149

    "The most lucrative hotdog stands in the history of America, each hotdog stand gotta make 15 grand a day" ......class😂

    • @Noah-zo4gn
      @Noah-zo4gn 4 года назад +1

      Liquidated is what I think he said

  • @forrest1875
    @forrest1875 4 года назад +173

    BETTER TITLE: Lee contemplating if coke dealing is worthwhile for him

  • @self-transforming_machine-elf
    @self-transforming_machine-elf 5 лет назад +790

    lee just making sure he can scrape it together on the road lmao

    • @ogbbq2261
      @ogbbq2261 5 лет назад +13

      Brah I don’t know how good has it been for REDBAN after joe took him off the podcast. I hope lee doesn’t become another Tommy Easter living in a van

    • @jonrivere424
      @jonrivere424 5 лет назад +2

      @@ogbbq2261 then don't hope for the best why tf worry about someone else's life like that

    • @kingjoe8588
      @kingjoe8588 5 лет назад +3

      Og Bbq u sound like your 12😂

    • @lean4real_11
      @lean4real_11 5 лет назад +6

      Og Bbq hey tough guy, watch your fuckin mouth. youre not scaring anyone. stop being a negative bitch and stfu

    • @lean4real_11
      @lean4real_11 5 лет назад +1

      ginge gingerton edgy lil bitch

  • @Phoney.Baloney
    @Phoney.Baloney 5 лет назад +611

    Lee with that quick math brain🤯

    • @somerandomarmydude
      @somerandomarmydude 5 лет назад +20

      I'm glad I wasn't the last one to think that?

    • @danielmorffi5503
      @danielmorffi5503 5 лет назад +57

      Facts i was like the jew brain id strong in this one

    • @harristech6807
      @harristech6807 5 лет назад +6

      LOL this why I fk n love RUclips comments, always miss funny as s shi t like this hahahah. He calculated that so fast!!!!

    • @Brayden-sb9ut
      @Brayden-sb9ut 5 лет назад +2

      Eric Cage ur jealous that we’re smarter than u?

    • @StinkyPataki
      @StinkyPataki 5 лет назад +20

      Brayden lmao no I’m never jealous of a fucking Jew. Never.

  • @Ally.Cat.252
    @Ally.Cat.252 5 лет назад +2480

    Is 85 the only year Joey remembers?

    • @MagicDragonesk
      @MagicDragonesk 5 лет назад +218

      It's the only year he falsely remembers to lie about shit hes done

    • @kevyyar
      @kevyyar 5 лет назад +21

      @@MagicDragonesk facts

    • @gunbacker9428
      @gunbacker9428 5 лет назад +92

      Well he said 87, 88. 89

    • @bertiewaldron6925
      @bertiewaldron6925 5 лет назад +1

      Psykonaut 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

    • @jonathanstone3588
      @jonathanstone3588 5 лет назад +8

      Psykonaut how do you know it’s fake

  • @Marky2nice
    @Marky2nice 5 лет назад +213

    “When I tell ya everything, I tell ya everything”.
    -Joey Diaz 2019

  • @archaicsoul4597
    @archaicsoul4597 4 года назад +71

    Lol Joey actually makes half a good point here. Tell everyone you’re broke so you know who your real friends are 😂

  • @footballa57
    @footballa57 4 года назад +217

    Joey: "If I was a coke dealer right now, guess who's house i would hide everything at?"
    Lee: "Who?"
    Joey: "I'm looking at him."
    Lee *happliy*: "Really?!"
    That meant a lot to him because it meant Joey completely trusts him 😅

    • @jovan4015
      @jovan4015 2 года назад +2

      @Leo Coyne there's no disrespect, it's all business.

    • @josh9941
      @josh9941 2 года назад +1

      @Leo Coyne u get wat you sign up for no disrespect

    • @zachschiller7321
      @zachschiller7321 2 года назад

      @Leo Coyne weird take

    • @dxublexxsplicitxxsplicit4943
      @dxublexxsplicitxxsplicit4943 2 года назад

      @Leo Coyne disrespect? Really? I see the person I'm blaming for having coke if I ever gotta get rid of it.

    • @dxublexxsplicitxxsplicit4943
      @dxublexxsplicitxxsplicit4943 2 года назад

      @Leo Coyne* psssst* it's you

  • @LetsGoGetThem
    @LetsGoGetThem 4 года назад +287

    Bruh doing crime when there isnt CCTV is like easy mode though.

    • @heisenburg8608
      @heisenburg8608 4 года назад +86

      These old fuckers had it so easy, and 90% of them still managed to go pen 😂

    • @EikottXD
      @EikottXD 4 года назад +9

      What are y'all talking about they had CCTV in the 80s it was just on tape instead of a hard drive or the cloud.

    • @LetsGoGetThem
      @LetsGoGetThem 4 года назад +62

      @@EikottXD Not widespread, and bad tech.

    • @johnbean2596
      @johnbean2596 4 года назад +8

      Tape used to be expensive as fuck! Anyone else remember stealing rolls of film lol

    • @owenarmstrong1915
      @owenarmstrong1915 3 года назад +4

      People were the CCTV in those days, wasn't seen as snitching

  • @macro312
    @macro312 5 лет назад +88

    "I'm looking at him"
    Joey, you have a charisma about you.

  • @XAX-v
    @XAX-v 5 лет назад +85

    Lee at his most comprehensive. Usually he's half dead

  • @bobbiblaze
    @bobbiblaze 5 лет назад +43

    "There's so many things you can do" - Joey Diaz 2019 with a smirk on his face

  • @gr8gr832
    @gr8gr832 5 лет назад +199

    I’m high asf and these stories are Oscar worthy I tell you no lies lol

    • @robdcollector2808
      @robdcollector2808 5 лет назад +7

      GR8 GR8..hes got enough stories for a Goodfellas 2

    • @williamcutrell7456
      @williamcutrell7456 4 года назад +2

      That's what they are stories 😂 this guy a phony

    • @Noname-ho7ib
      @Noname-ho7ib 4 года назад

      Same im baked as hell binge watching this shit

    • @t6amygdala
      @t6amygdala 4 года назад

      I wish I was

    • @77zeu33
      @77zeu33 3 года назад +1

      @@williamcutrell7456 ? watch your mouth goofy

  • @remek_ember
    @remek_ember 5 лет назад +105

    Joey: I pay your bills, your groceries, your rent, 3,000 a month
    Lee: Yeah but I can't have parties...

    • @elcheekoful
      @elcheekoful 4 года назад +4

      Its a good question

    • @kylesnyder1910
      @kylesnyder1910 4 года назад +2

      @@elcheekoful no it’s not

    • @DrMattPDO
      @DrMattPDO 3 года назад +4

      Look, he doesn’t have parties.

    • @__-fk4jz
      @__-fk4jz 3 года назад +1

      @@DrMattPDO how do you know

    • @cudanhn7021
      @cudanhn7021 3 года назад +4

      @@__-fk4jz because it’s lee

  • @MrFriko22
    @MrFriko22 5 лет назад +77

    When you high as coyote and you start listening this 80’s coke stories

  • @icarusblack892
    @icarusblack892 5 лет назад +396

    At 1:27 Lees Jew power activated

    • @bobtob8423
      @bobtob8423 5 лет назад +31

      Lol he beautiful minded that shit real quick 😂

    • @harristech6807
      @harristech6807 5 лет назад +21

      LOL this why I fk n love RUclips comments, always miss funny as s shi t like this hahahah. He calculated that so fast!!!!

    • @icarusblack892
      @icarusblack892 5 лет назад +9

      I just couldn't help myself after reading thru comments like "hold on, nobody noticed how quick he did that math". Lol

    • @danieldeprophetis2114
      @danieldeprophetis2114 5 лет назад +1

      I'm so happy I'm not the only one who noticed that. Holy shit Lee why are u not a rocket scientist???

    • @youfuckingmomo1632
      @youfuckingmomo1632 5 лет назад +1

      homeboy was prepared LMFAO

  • @shaundixon6245
    @shaundixon6245 5 лет назад +380

    Joey diaz's beginner's guide to being a coke dealer

    • @Saucecrates
      @Saucecrates 5 лет назад +15

      In the 90s

    • @rvhdcroa4569
      @rvhdcroa4569 5 лет назад +11

      Shaun Dixon If u need a guide u probably shouldnt do it lmao

    • @camronstillgess
      @camronstillgess 5 лет назад +20

      Rvhd croa u sound stupid. How do street ppl get knowledge than? They learn from Og’s. U gotta be guided one way or another

    • @haych1637
      @haych1637 5 лет назад

      Camron Stillgess u sound stupid ain’t hard as long as u can cop the shit u can get rid of it common sense

    • @ThePeacePlant
      @ThePeacePlant 5 лет назад +8

      @@camronstillgess you don't learn from ogs lol. That's all movie shit, your local og isnt giving classes. You just go with instinct. Like he said he hid his money at girls or friends house. That's basic shit you just do when you are hiding shit lol. Y'all dudes who think Joey is a gangster are too much of basic dudes. I grew up in the suburbs and not even a ghetto dude but I surrounded myself with sub cultures. I imagine y'all are the nerdiest dudes who always dreamed about staying out past the street lights and living that life. Joey is a basic dude who dealt drugs, hes not special

  • @ajg5138
    @ajg5138 5 лет назад +1336

    Lmao joey telling a jew that you dont need money to be happy

  • @Porldweace
    @Porldweace 5 лет назад +290

    Did joey live his whole life in 1985

    • @JohnDoe-sp3dc
      @JohnDoe-sp3dc 4 года назад +34

      His stories are made up fiction with a sprinkle of his own experience here and a pinch of other people's stories there. Maybe it's because most of Joey's audience hasn't experienced drug addiction or lived criminal lifestyle styles, but it's so damn obvious that he's making up these stories on the fly as he tells them. He'll give conflicting dates and madness for events all the time. He also goes back and forth between saying he never really made money or sold that much coke to saying he was fucking scarface moving kilos.

    • @Porldweace
      @Porldweace 4 года назад +8

      John Doe that’s straight facts mate. I hear what your saying ✌️😂 💯

    • @h.l.malazan5782
      @h.l.malazan5782 4 года назад +1

      It was a glorious year.

    • @jkilla3100
      @jkilla3100 4 года назад +2

      @@JohnDoe-sp3dc wow dead on lol exactly what i was thinkin aswell no cap

    • @rurathn5534
      @rurathn5534 4 года назад +3

      @@JohnDoe-sp3dc sure man and what are your sources?

  • @j_toledo419
    @j_toledo419 5 лет назад +140

    "They always pay it Lee" 😁

    • @mtumeumrani376
      @mtumeumrani376 5 лет назад +3

      @which is why Lee says "what if they don't pay?"

    • @josephf9984
      @josephf9984 4 года назад

      BackdriftNightfall thank you. At least someone understood it.

  • @EnZo7992
    @EnZo7992 2 года назад +2

    I will never get tired of the sounds and faces Lee makes whenever he’s surprised by whatever Joeys saying 😂

  • @tobyn123
    @tobyn123 5 лет назад +109

    My friend was paying his mum's mortgage when he was 13 selling weed. If he was selling sweets or some shit he'd be in the local paper as a hero... Instead he ended up with a criminal record.

    • @kristopherrice1465
      @kristopherrice1465 5 лет назад +9

      It’s a shame shit should be legal, but just know playing with fire usually gets you burned

    • @Cheatrrr
      @Cheatrrr 5 лет назад +56

      No he wasn’t. You’re not paying a mortgage by selling weed. Nobody is selling a 13 year old multiple pounds & where did he get the money to get the pounds in the first place.
      Let’s all take a moment & remember to stop lying.

    • @kristopherrice1465
      @kristopherrice1465 5 лет назад +23

      Game Bred I know 3 kids who pay the mortgage since their freshman year... not everyone’s daddy has a 4000$ mortgage either dumbass....

    • @tobyn123
      @tobyn123 5 лет назад +14

      @@Cheatrrr also how the fuck do you know about what a 13 year old can get up to on one of the roughest estates in Europe?

    • @fkin8shyt
      @fkin8shyt 5 лет назад +4

      @@Cheatrrr Well they put you in your place quick, huh?

  • @AnthonyMartinez-jg8lo
    @AnthonyMartinez-jg8lo 5 лет назад +142

    Uncle Joey looks like he's turning into a baby dinosaur.

    • @funonvancouverisland
      @funonvancouverisland 5 лет назад +6

      Not the momma!

    • @FlyRaven16
      @FlyRaven16 4 года назад +3

      Damn I didn’t want this to be funny but it was 😂

    • @arthurfonzarelli9828
      @arthurfonzarelli9828 4 года назад

      Lee looks more like the dinosaur with his short arms

    • @Medyobabae
      @Medyobabae 4 года назад +5

      HE LOOKS LIKE BABY SINCLAIR FROM DINOSAURS

  • @josephblackwood4001
    @josephblackwood4001 3 года назад +36

    *As Bob Marley once said: "Money is numbas and numbas neva end. If it take money to be happy, yah search fa happiness will neva end"*

  • @sloopymoosadjob2358
    @sloopymoosadjob2358 5 лет назад +25

    Nothing like coming down and listening to coke stories

  • @jpr442
    @jpr442 5 лет назад +9

    5:30 aw he was so happy

  • @bluethunder4542
    @bluethunder4542 4 года назад +4

    The greatest laughter I ever experienced was a dirt poor Puerto Rican mother and her two sons who loved to joke and interact ,and it showed md a life lesson I'll never forget ,was beautiful.

  • @herberttorojr7640
    @herberttorojr7640 4 года назад +3

    I used to move work in the late 90s this video is bringing all the anxiety and stress and insomnia back

  • @Whocares-z6v
    @Whocares-z6v 4 года назад +32

    Lee is so clueless man jesus 😂 "do you go and hide your money throughout the night each time you make another 3 grand?"...

    • @josephf9984
      @josephf9984 4 года назад +6

      I really can’t stand Lee. His high-pitch voice + his ignorance and borderline stupidity makes it extremely difficult to get through the podcasts.. thank God Uncle Joey’s wisdom and story telling overrides anything that Lee can possibly say. I apologize to anyone that actually likes Lee, although I really don’t know how you could. 🤷‍♂️

  • @joshuacorona1775
    @joshuacorona1775 4 года назад +6

    "Ashley and her Chinese friends"🤣🤣

  • @jonsellas
    @jonsellas 5 лет назад +84

    Uncle Joey is never going to stop thinking about cocaine. Whether or not she uses ever again, it will always be on his mind. I believe the question was how do you get over the stress of not having any money?

    • @asimpson164
      @asimpson164 5 лет назад +23

      That's how cocaine works. The very first time you do it, those thoughts show up. Every day for the rest of your life you will have at least a few thoughts about doing it. Every day.

    • @chrisconnor8086
      @chrisconnor8086 5 лет назад +1

      jonsellas because dealing or stealing, he always knew he could make a bill any given day

    • @Mizzle420420
      @Mizzle420420 5 лет назад +13

      A Simpson nah thats not true for everyone ive done plenty of coke and i almost never think about it, so many better drugs out there

    • @asimpson164
      @asimpson164 5 лет назад +3

      @@Mizzle420420 I can't dispute that my man. I believe you. My only defense would be that it doesn't affect you like most because it wasn't the pinnacle of your chemical experience.

    • @Mizzle420420
      @Mizzle420420 5 лет назад +6

      A Simpson yeah thats for sure, i definitely liked it alot until i found better shit like MDMA (Molly), Pressed Ecstasy Pills, Psychedelics (LSD, Mushrooms), Opioids. Coke is just super boring to me and kinda gives me anxiety

  • @jacklancaster8622
    @jacklancaster8622 4 года назад +3

    I love Lee and Joeys friendship Joey clearly looks out for him and Lee respect's him

  • @cristiancruz9037
    @cristiancruz9037 4 года назад +7

    "i know people who were broke but had a great time" unlce joey dropping knowledge

  • @andrewtorrez5478
    @andrewtorrez5478 5 лет назад +6

    "but what if they don't pay??" "There gonna FUCKING PAY LEE!!!" LMAO dead hahah

  • @jeremiahshields7827
    @jeremiahshields7827 5 лет назад +63

    Split second thought Joey's shirt said "Legally Brazilian" lol.

    • @Sheed96
      @Sheed96 5 лет назад

      Jeremiah Shields it’s doesn’t though

    • @jeremiahshields7827
      @jeremiahshields7827 5 лет назад +11

      @@Sheed96 ....my comment covered that with the word "thought".

    • @Sheed96
      @Sheed96 5 лет назад +1

      @@jeremiahshields7827 nah u were wrong its ok

    • @col.nugget1524
      @col.nugget1524 5 лет назад +3

      rasheed sobo shut the fuck up rasheed

  • @Applepielord7
    @Applepielord7 5 лет назад +5

    I love how lee seems so innocent 😭😂

  • @SimplyLimbo
    @SimplyLimbo 4 года назад +6

    Money doesnt buy happiness, it makes life easier. Thats all

  • @asher8085
    @asher8085 3 года назад +18

    Hearing him tell about how he was making tens of thousands of dollars and how he was still pretty much next to dead broke that whole time really exemplifies how expensive a coke habit can be🤣🤣

    • @timshark6315
      @timshark6315 2 года назад +1

      No rest for the wicked

    • @nikitaw1982
      @nikitaw1982 2 года назад

      Detailing cars fun if on coke though. Prison time taught him to to be sly act poor?

    • @tyarnold4088
      @tyarnold4088 2 года назад +1

      When they are using they never make money. The more they make the more they do and spend. The stories about how much they made are always exaggerated. You can't believe an addict.

  • @dylan7086
    @dylan7086 5 лет назад +4

    Joey “pshhhh i worked my ass off bro” Diaz does it again 😂😂GOAT

  • @spicolip2334
    @spicolip2334 4 года назад +14

    bottle of water, pen and paper, chicken coup top left in the background, candle in a little cup, snotty tissue, some other shit scattered all over the table, joey is doing santeria. oh shit. run lee.

  • @tonylyons1274
    @tonylyons1274 5 лет назад +1

    I have a new found of respect for this fella...RESPECT to your hussle man knows how you rolled,
    Mans gotta do what a mans gotta do STANDARD

  • @dawicked2k8
    @dawicked2k8 5 лет назад +18

    Joey "Quick maffs" Diaz

  • @theanonymous2349
    @theanonymous2349 5 лет назад +2

    Broo HATS OFF to my man LEE he’s hella quick with the maths like some little Chinese kid

  • @fredward7476
    @fredward7476 5 лет назад +51

    Being a coke dealer seems like it would be one of the most stressful and hazardous jobs on the planet. Get set up and robbed, end up in huge debt to some sadistic psycho mf's. Potential nightmare scenario. I dunno though, maybe the 80's were different.

    • @ohnonotjo
      @ohnonotjo 5 лет назад +10

      No cameras and social media back then. Reputation and action meant something. You got a problem? Kill the guy and move away. Or stay and run that shit

    • @pickelsvx
      @pickelsvx 4 года назад +14

      That's why you make sure you don't owe money to the supplier, if you always pay up front then you will never owe shit to anyone.

    • @johndough7485
      @johndough7485 4 года назад +3

      it probably is depending how you do it. I imagine like any career if you really stick to it you can end up in a place where you don't gotta do the dirty work anymore you just make the big decisions. I don't think any coke dealer is going to want to be a corner man for life. No matter who you are if you got lots of coke and cash on you its risky as hell. Some gangsters have PTSD its a brutal life.

    • @srobertweiser
      @srobertweiser 3 года назад +6

      Unless you are an addict, cocaine is a shitty business to be involved in. High risk, low reward. Plus, you’re dealing with coke heads 24/7. Hell, even if you are an addict, it’s still a shitty business.

    • @ryanjofre
      @ryanjofre 3 года назад +2

      A guy I knew got into the coke game when he was a sophomore in H.S………..he was murdered before he turned 26 and he wasn’t even a real player. He was a good man that made a very bad choice because of his poverty.
      I’d rather pick up dog shit than get involved in that evil world.

  • @zachtv1476
    @zachtv1476 2 года назад +2

    Lee really asked the best questions! Joey said it in an episode Lee always has the million dollar question 😂

  • @ybgkokekoke8491
    @ybgkokekoke8491 4 года назад +6

    We never had money, that’s how we get over the stress of not having money...you can’t stress about something you’ll never see.

  • @davida.7967
    @davida.7967 5 лет назад +4

    @ 10:22
    "You gotta pay the juice, lee..."
    Epic words .

  • @benitogarcia5751
    @benitogarcia5751 5 лет назад +3

    Lee looked so thrilled when Joey said he would hide money at his house hahah

  • @Y0WMS
    @Y0WMS 2 года назад +1

    Miss these days glad I was able to watch it when it was new

  • @33jtracing
    @33jtracing 5 лет назад +7

    I’ve learned to be humble with out loot. All I need is family.

    • @ahaok6245
      @ahaok6245 3 года назад

      🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰

    • @TattooMyBones
      @TattooMyBones 2 месяца назад

      But need money for family 😊

  • @overlordone1246
    @overlordone1246 2 года назад

    These two are brilliant together

  • @adambarnhart2188
    @adambarnhart2188 5 лет назад +29

    Storytime with Joey is just him remembering movies he’s watched...

    • @tobe1207
      @tobe1207 3 года назад

      You can't even imagine people not just staying inside and posting memes. Joey's stories aren't even crazy. You're just super sheltered

  • @donnaryland9976
    @donnaryland9976 3 года назад +1

    Uncle Coco hits that nail right on the head!!

  • @BudsCartoon
    @BudsCartoon 4 года назад +42

    You can tell Joey is legit here because he knows the value in selling in grams AND wholesale ounces. I used to sell weed, pick up 8 pounds a week. I used to sell 6 pounds off the bat at a $500 profit each. No work, just move each pound. The last 2 pounds I would sell in 1/8ths, 1/4s, halfs, ozs and QPs. Back in the early 2000s an oz gram'd out at $20 (though I did 1 for $15, 2 for $25) would be $560 off a $250 oz or whatever. $300 profit per oz, but a lot of work. If you did that for an entire pound it'd be $4800 profit. So with the wholesale $3000 (6lbs at $500 each) and a few extra thousand of the other 2 lbs of small stuff it was a nice weekly profit. I'm still living off that money 15 years later.

    • @Baltazaarr
      @Baltazaarr 2 года назад

      How much u made that you’re still living from it 15 years later

    • @ezzeljordan7060
      @ezzeljordan7060 2 года назад

      How tf did you get away with taxing people like that

    • @BudsCartoon
      @BudsCartoon 2 года назад +1

      @@ezzeljordan7060 There is/was a LOT of money and little competition in white collar areas. Plus rarely any problems.

    • @BudsCartoon
      @BudsCartoon 2 года назад +3

      @@Baltazaarr Well I work in the legit cannabiz now and do pretty well, so the money I have stashed I don't need to access very often. I was able to put away around $200K by the time I closed up shop. (This is a fictitious story if the IRS is reading this)

    • @ShawnFX
      @ShawnFX 2 года назад

      @@BudsCartoon lmaoo a fictitious story if the irs is reading. Damn man I wish I can sell weed and other drugs. But it's a HUGE NO in our religion to deal with and make dirty money

  • @jdgoesham5381
    @jdgoesham5381 2 года назад +4

    Just like with Patrice O'Neil, I can rewatch/relisten to Joey's stuff many times. And like with Patrice, we're lucky to have all this material we'll have forever to laugh about.

  • @mikeyoung2444
    @mikeyoung2444 5 лет назад +73

    Joey "Let's Pretend" Diaz

    • @zyncra3965
      @zyncra3965 5 лет назад +1

      He's been pretending most of his stories so the name is fitting

  • @ryanjofre
    @ryanjofre 3 года назад +2

    These people who think Joey is constantly lying because they’ve had such boring & pedestrian lives crack me up!!
    Joey has had an extremely interesting life and he’s blessed to be alive to tell these crazy stories.
    God bless Joey Diaz. He’s the man.

    • @paullayfield
      @paullayfield 3 года назад +2

      If you think about it, Steve O has just as many drug stories that he somehow remembers & he has plenty of video to confirm, so these stories aren't so far off

  • @timcunningham1101
    @timcunningham1101 5 лет назад +8

    12:35 I cant lmfao

  • @Frisky_Panda
    @Frisky_Panda 2 года назад

    12:10 what Joey says has been my biggest helper in life.

  • @nunyafockler5650
    @nunyafockler5650 4 года назад +3

    In Joey Diaz We Trust. 💯💙🔥

  • @PteBloggins
    @PteBloggins 2 года назад

    The sound of Joey drinking water makes my day

  • @johncampbelltattoos2494
    @johncampbelltattoos2494 5 лет назад +8

    Lee: "i cant believe you think 100 thousands on drugs as an investment" ...😦

  • @wrist_drip_limp9268
    @wrist_drip_limp9268 3 года назад +2

    I love the drug info clips more than anything

  • @timothycarr5707
    @timothycarr5707 5 лет назад +13

    Look at Joey making it up as he goes

    • @Doven88
      @Doven88 11 месяцев назад

      We got a mind reader over here

  • @TonyFrickey-ur9jy
    @TonyFrickey-ur9jy 6 месяцев назад

    Joey knows the game and how to play it. Anybody who ever did dirt in the streets knows this dude ain't lying.

  • @capitalgains4194
    @capitalgains4194 5 лет назад +8

    Money is not everything, but its right up there with oxygen. Realest shit i ever heard

  • @scotalian5087
    @scotalian5087 2 года назад +1

    I gotta tip my hat to Lee, quick with the math, knows how to ask good questions to Joey, the duo is fucking brilliant

  • @rxtuninginc8444
    @rxtuninginc8444 3 года назад +9

    This guy has had a pretty interesting life. He's a good story teller too. I'd love to sit and have a beer or a few lines with him if he still did it and listen to some of the crazy shit

  • @jonfonts4050
    @jonfonts4050 2 года назад +1

    Joey has 20 lifetimes worth of stories.

  • @parr40
    @parr40 3 года назад +6

    I did that for a little over a year, friend of mine was selling coke, hard & soft. Asked if he could put a safe in my attic, said he would need a key to my house & he would let me know when he was coming over, paid me $2k a month, easy money, very risky however I made close to 30k for basically doing absolutely nothing but keeping my mouth shut.

    • @parr40
      @parr40 3 года назад +4

      I never wanted him to take the safe, however he said it was time to move to a different location, he was always paranoid. The most money that was in that safe in my attic was $108k, I loved helping him count it, he would say ‘what ya saying? You want paid in 50’s & 100’s or you want small bills?’ Lolol I always said, I don’t care, you can pay me In $1’s 😂😂😂😂and every time he would give me all the small bills 💵

    • @jujutrini8412
      @jujutrini8412 2 года назад +3

      I think you have to be paranoid to be a successful dealer.

  • @bxz-um9mg
    @bxz-um9mg 2 года назад

    I hardly agree with many family and friends but for some reason I agree with Joey 100% of the time. His wisdom amazes me frequently…

  • @brashinga735
    @brashinga735 5 лет назад +3

    You know it’ll be good when he sips that water before the story

  • @leadrings
    @leadrings 4 года назад

    joey writing some killer notes at the beginning there

  • @urg4serg
    @urg4serg 5 лет назад +9

    Damn he added those months up quick. I would’ve been using my fingers.
    63 to 89 - 1 sec later = 26

    • @Karanpat
      @Karanpat 4 года назад +1

      URG4SERG bc u stupid lmao

  • @lalomaldonado8417
    @lalomaldonado8417 4 года назад +2

    Lee feels good that uncle Joey would pick him to hide his money lol

  • @crazyjoedavola5430
    @crazyjoedavola5430 5 лет назад +37

    Lee 'the most gullible man in the universe' Syatt

    • @boofert.washington2499
      @boofert.washington2499 5 лет назад +3

      Maybe. However, the same can be said about most of Joey's fans. Not me, of course. I see thru his bullshit stories. He's still funny, just full of shit.

    • @carlosherrera4745
      @carlosherrera4745 5 лет назад +2

      I think all his stories are legit but he definitely adds some shit into em just to exaggerate a bit lol

    • @crazyjoedavola5430
      @crazyjoedavola5430 5 лет назад +2

      @@carlosherrera4745 - Yeah, I've heard details in the same stories change but I think they are true for the most part, maybe just a bit fuzzy. He's lived quite a life...entertaining as fuck

  • @supremeleaderkoko
    @supremeleaderkoko 3 года назад

    Easily one of my favorite joey diaz clip

  • @TheGanjologist
    @TheGanjologist 5 лет назад +7

    Nobody checks the cereal box in a home invasion

  • @chrisgoosebrooks638
    @chrisgoosebrooks638 2 года назад +2

    Lee is like a little kid talking with grandpa

  • @ac8D3
    @ac8D3 5 лет назад +10

    I can’t stand that sound of Joey drinking his water🤣

  • @ManningOWNsTeboww
    @ManningOWNsTeboww 3 года назад

    00:47
    That gulp rattled my bones

  • @ebz3001
    @ebz3001 5 лет назад +5

    This is a TED Talk

  • @carlosdelara247
    @carlosdelara247 4 года назад +1

    1:15 why is this so funny too me 😂😂😂

  • @bbHoodski
    @bbHoodski 4 года назад +24

    I've been on a Joey Diaz binge and have heard all his stories about a dozen times. I agree with some others that his stories are halfway bullshit.
    His details change between podcasts and standup routines - like here he says he hid coke and cash at the dealership he worked at. Another time he told this story it was about ripping off a salesman who was selling and he was the one who hid it at the dealership. In that telling it took him way longer to consider selling coke again since he tried going straight and got bored after a couple of months.
    With that said, Joey is an old dude who lived one HELL of a life fit for 10 people. I'm only 30 and already look back on my college experience through a hazy window.
    But you know, stories are already so much more epic than the reality. We all have legendary stories about that festival we went to or the fight outside the bar. But in the moment, taken as a whole from a neutral 3rd person perspective, they're just kind of cool.
    Things get exaggerated by the mindset you were in. Being cocky and thinking you're the shit can taint memories and even create new ones. Dates get messed up and situations cross-over into other experiences. The stories you tell about the experience become the actual memory itself.
    Memory is a fuzzy thing even for people like Joey who does have a great memory. The 'core' of his stories are true. But the details will forever be lost. He's not a liar, he's a 60 year man who's told these stories a million times that it's replaced his real memory of his life.
    I dont know why I went so out of my way to type this. I think memory is just an interesting thing and most of us skew younger and haven't experienced what it's like to be old ex-drug dealer criminal. Take his tales with a grain of salt but respect the man because his growth to become an un-shitty person is real. He's an inspiration for everyone, no matter how much you fail or fuck-up, there's always more life to get your shit together.

  • @FineDayWasted
    @FineDayWasted 4 года назад

    There was never anyone more 80’s

  • @Paperbag-om6mh
    @Paperbag-om6mh 5 лет назад +3

    Whatever juices are in the brain, my brain came listening to uncles Joey's voice

  • @Depp-ressed-
    @Depp-ressed- 4 года назад +1

    Joey drinking a bottle of water is pure ASMR.

  • @nguvideos2868
    @nguvideos2868 5 лет назад +14

    Maybe money can't buy happiness, but when you don't have it, then sometimes happiness isn't even an option. You gotta have money to be comfortable, hard to be happy if you can't get comfortable

    • @andrewrichards188
      @andrewrichards188 4 года назад

      Im very poor right now, im pretty happy to be honest.

    • @timshark6315
      @timshark6315 2 года назад

      Gotta learn to be uncomfortable to grow