My ex was a master manipulator who played me for years, and looking back, I can’t believe I put up with it for so long. She slept with countless random guys and acted like nothing happened, like she didn’t emotionally and mentally stab me in the back every time. One day, after a few great days together, I went to my college classes as usual. When I came back to her apartment, something felt off. The tense vibe, the way she spoke like she was hiding a secret made me nervous. Then there was a knock at the door. A young man walks in, announces himself, and casually acts like he lives there. She’s upstairs in the shower and yells down, “Honey, did you just come in? I heard the door!” I answer, “No, I’m still here.” Then I turn to the guy and ask who he is and why he just walked in. He apologizes and says, “Oh, I was here all day with La- and I told her I had to drive my sister to work, but I can come back later if she’s free.” At this point, I’m fuming but stay calm. I call up to her, “Hey, do you know someone named Scott?” She freezes and pretends not to know who he is. The guy then casually adds, “We were going at it all day, so she probably needed a shower to feel fresh.” That was it for me. I grabbed my jacket and left. She ran after me in her bathrobe, begging me not to go, swearing he was her cousin and that I misunderstood. But there was nothing left to misunderstand. Four years of my life wasted on someone who didn’t care about me, my dreams, or my loyalty. If you’re doubting your partner’s loyalty, sometimes an honest conversation isn’t enough to clear the air. I remember feeling lost, wondering if I was being paranoid or if something deeper was happening. Eventually, I reached out to a team that helped me uncover hidden truths messages, accounts, and everything I couldn’t figure out on my own. If you’re in a similar situation and need clarity, you can try contacting MetaspyClubLLC@gmail. com for guidance. Knowing the truth was painful, but it helped me move forward and finally focus on what I deserved: honesty, respect, and peace of mind.
That's a big one. I live next door to a narc and I find the constant need she has for validation, which manifests as her only talking about herself, incredibly draining. She will phone and talk to me for an hour, talk about herself, moan about others and never once think to ask about me or my life, not even a 'How are you?'.
I had a deep friendship with someone like this for 11 yrs. It got worse as time progressed. I expressed that I felt tired and ask if she could not talk about things that were draining. Her response was: but you're my friend.
I had a coworker who used to talk about herself all the time, including what diet she was on and what she ate, where she went, etc. After wasting time listening to her describe what she had for lunch in great detail, i asked, "Do you want to know what I had for lunch?" She said, "Not really." That pretty much said it all
Wi know 2 one at work and another I've known for 20 years... taking pictures of food and description of what they ate or how much money they have is big
A good (and easy) acid test to detect a female narcissist is to talk about how beautiful or sexy another woman is. They will always find a way to put that woman down even if the woman is a famous movie star or model. The narcissist will even ridiculously claim that men have told her that she is even more beautiful. Narcissists are not only exhausting and needy, but they’re actually quite boring and predictable.
The narc dudes are weirdly possive like that also any chicj you know like talk to they get extremely jealous we got a narcs in the closet problem lol 😂
@@MrIoes-xh4sr EXACTLY only a narcissistic, delusional woman would think she’s entitled to a compliment because someone else is receiving one. Incidentally these are women that I have no sexual relationship with at all and often times I’m talking to someone else and they butt in on the conversation. Apparently you fit the profile.
I remember working with an entitled female narcissist who was very charming at first, she wore slightly revealing clothes, and behaved in a quite innocuous way at the beginning. It was only when things didn't go her way, and things started going my way that she started belittling, invalidating, and behaving in a very bossy way(she wasn't my boss). She asked me for help when she got laid off from her job, I helped her. I didn't know a lot about narcissism then. She was very kind and charming when she needed help, but after she got her help done, she went back to being rude and intimidating. It is only now after I have learned about narcissism, that I am able to let-go of this person mentally, I never understood why someone would blatantly use and throw others while backbiting them and insulting them and being fake nice to them in person when they needed them. The cherry on top of the cake is that she barely knows me as a person. Imagine people who are emotionally intertwined in deep relationships with her.
I’ve had a few narcissistic do the exact same thing. They will gaslight u then when they are down in life? They actually will have the nerve too come to you for help!i told one to beat it and another one I said isn’t this ironic? U como g to me with Help Me…
Sounds like my mother-in-law. A gold digging, deceitful, abusive narcissist, who never took responsibility for mentally and physically abusing my husband as a child. I actually tried to have a relationship with her, even though my husband warned me she was fake and incapable of caring about anyone but herself. I was naive enough to think she had changed, and even told him I thought she did, but the mask slipped when her ego became bruised, because the abuse came up in conversation that she initiated. I realized then what a pathetic excuse of a woman she was, who could not take responsibility for her own cruel actions against her own child. As a mother, I would walk to the ends of the earth for my son, and cannot relate to abusive narcissistic people.
My ex wife was a narcissist I didn’t know it at first it was until the last three years of our marriage that she showed me her true colors. It’s been roughly four years now and I’m scared stiff of getting into another relationship. At 57 I feel that being alone is the best possible outcome for me.
Same, I was married to a male one. It’s a different experience after them 🤬, but don’t deny yourself. You’re now filled with more tools and knowledge than you had before her, that’s my positive outlook on it.
I’d suggest a major clarification about self-centeredness - a covert/vulnerable narcissist is not going to overtly make things about herself. She’s likely to want her target specifically to pay attention to her and gets it by training him behind the scenes through baiting, manipulation, and fear. She occasionally manipulates groups if she can do so subtly without being spotted, but if she knows she can’t do so without being detected she will make herself seem small - almost as if everyone around needs to perceive her as a harmless mouse.
That is so true. My former BFF is a covert narc. I knew nothing about these folks at the beginning of our friendship, or else I would’ve spotted it earlier. Anyway, yes a covert narc wants to seem humble, self sacrificing and like the ultimate selfless caretaker. But underneath that is seething resentment, and a constant need for adoration. The phony self deprecating comments, and constant humble bragging about “all they’ve done” for other people is a huge red flag. Come to find out she constantly humble bragged about helping me, like I’m some kind of irresponsible idiot who can’t take care of myself. They thrive on being the hero / martyr / victim. And yes, folks who don’t really know her think she is harmless, so sweet. They have no idea who they’re really dealing with.
More simplified ways to dehumanized someone with a personality disorder and their entire existence as this. Every female covert is just this. I wonder if I'll ever see a day when people with npd are actually treated like anyone else with a personality disorder. Oh yeah I'm definitely spending all my time just manipulating people to give me admiration as if the awareness of it needing to be manipulated would make it feel genuine. Depression, anxiety, psychosis and other disorders just don't exist with a narcissist. We just feed off that 24/7. Like we are not humans and just survive off admiration and praise. Tell me, how does someone with npd and self awareness feel any motivation to even exist if this is what we are lumped into as if everyone with it is just a baseless stereotype associated with these behaviors
@@apatheticxmindsetx3549damn here you are trying to guilt trip strangers into feeling like you’re some type of victim because you’re a cover narcissist… almost as if you’re doing exactly what you’re claiming to not be doing 💀
And they are quick to call YOU a narcissist for seeing through their bullcrap and calling them out! They hate ""NO"".They have zero respect for your boundaries!🙄
There is never enough patience, understanding, love, kindness, generosity or anything else to satisfy these demons ! They are just a bottomless pit that remains void in all areas and aspects of their life ! Evil, hateful, horrible creatures that will set the world on fire just to feel validated.
I feel a bit scared for all the young men out there that are not aware of this behaviour, we need more awareness of this to protect people sanity ☘️❤️☘️
lol nailed it with this comment man. The fake image they present to you to buy into and then you say or do or not do something and the mask is off and the ride you are about to go on you will have never EVER thought possible.
It’s kind of contradictory to say that a narcissist ex admitted that to gaslighting. One of the behavior patterns of a narcissist is that they won’t admit fault on their own, and that they use gaslighting to convince you that they were never at fault. I can tell you what behavior of my narcissist ex led me to believe that I was being gaslighted though. Gaslighting is a real insidious way of manipulation- to make you believe that there is something wrong with you, that the actions/words of your narcissist weren’t really what they seemed to be. It makes you question your judgement, leading to you ignoring your instincts and senses. I swallowed all of her gaslighting for years, mostly because I wanted the relationship to work- like most people who have been the partner of a narcissist. I started realizing that something was wrong 6 months before I was discarded. It was actually this revelation that I had that led to the discard- once I started seeing through the illusion that she presented, I started to see all of her actions for what they really were, and I started to question her on everything and stood my ground on issues that I previously gave in on. We had gotten into a really bad argument. Tensions between us had been building for a few months. We had to move from our rental and find a new place to live within 2 months, in a town that was going through a surge in prices for rental properties. It was difficult finding a place to live that was within our budget, and still live in the town that had come to be our community. Between that and all of the normal logistics in moving cause a lot of minor arguments and stress between us- more than what was normal with her narcissistic and selfish behavior. We found a place, moved in and was in the process of bringing the final things over from the old place to the new place and cleaning the old place when we had gotten into an argument about something minor. All of the pent up tensions and resentment came out. During the argument, she was dismissive to me and told me that everything was my fault and if I didn’t like it then I could pack my shit and leave. I was so frustrated that I knocked her external computer monitor down (so she would face me and not continue to argue with her back turned to me). She got up and in my face and told me that I probably wanted to hit her. I said that I didn’t, I just wanted to discuss the issues. She said that if I wasn’t man enough to hit her she would give herself a black eye and call the police on me. I turned and left the room, because I knew the argument was escalating to a place that I didn’t;t want it to go. As I turned to leave the room, she jumped on me and started punching me. I told her if she was going to hit me, I would call the police. She started punching me again, so I left the room, went to the master bathroom and called the police. They came, interviewed both of us and arrested her for spousal battery. Afterwards she only blamed me for the incident and never, never acknowledged that she hit me. A week or so later, she asked me to write a letter to the DA requesting that the charges be dropped. I said that I would write a letter but that she would have to acknowledge her actions and to apologize to me first. She said that she was sorry that I felt that way. I told her that I wouldn’t write anything to the DA, and she stormed off, giving me the silent treatment for a couple of days. I knew what happened, and have a very clear recollection of the events. I’ve been punched before with closed fists, and I know what it feels like- and it doesn’t feel like a “shove”, what she insisted was what she did (her story was that she shoved me only after I shoved her, which was nonsense). I got a copy of the police report, and one of several reasons that they arrested her is because they found her knuckles red and swollen. I tried to move through this, but she kept trying to change the narrative of what happened when I was very clear on what happened. I felt crazy, but knew that I wasn’t. This led me to question everything else that she told me. Once I started realizing that most things she told me (when it came to disagreements or things that I had an issue with) were lies, and I believed the illusion that she created to trick me. That’s what the narcissist does- they present an illusion to you. Just like looking at an optical illusion, once you see that it is a trick of the eyes, you can’t look at it again without seeing the trick. Once I started seeing through her illusions, the house of cards that she built started to fall down and I slowly started to realize the type of person that she was, even though I didn’t want to believe it. I started enforcing my boundaries and that drove her crazy and caused more fights and gaslighting, which is what I believe led to her finally discarding me 6 months after her arrest. She never admitted to gaslighting me though. Even after confronting her with things from years previous that I realized she changed to make me the one at fault, she stays with her story. Even with indisputable proof, she stays with her version of events and says everyone else is wrong. Don’t expect any type of satisfaction or closure from a narcissist, because you won’t get any. You have to believe your judgment and instinct, and not tie your self-worth and self-esteem to anything that they say to you. Additionally, If you ever suspect your partner is cheating on you give it a try and remotely access their phone. I had to follow my instincts and get in touch with this private investigator Metaspyhub@gmail. com who gave me unrestricted access my partner device.
Defend yourself against the abuse double standards abd manipulation lies and yes immediately the victim becomes the narc for speaking up lol human trafficking kidnapping kyimh about everything cowards evil who have abused our light and gifts to waste them on stupid things wheh we are fighting to get others healed and lifted up only the fake families are to be lifted up every one else even if your funding them is dog shit on their shoes
Thank you for not characterizing narcissism as only NPD. It’s a personality trait that exists on a spectrum. Though we all need a healthy level of narcissism to maintain confidence on our journey of personal growth, there is an observable pattern of behaviour in people with more abundant or unchecked narcissistic personality traits, and this pattern of behaviour can be extremely damaging to more vulnerable personality types. You don’t have to be diagnosed with a full-blown malignant personality disorder in order to be a narcissist who causes harm to others.
This comment is my favorite comment while combing through videos on this topic because it’s TRUE. I was raised by a narcissist and I can’t deny that I’ve picked up on some of my mothers traits (as one does with parents because they’re our “role models”) but one way I know I’m not a full blown narcissist is because I will literally catch myself and that’s something narcissists are incapable of doing. Sometimes I feel so much empathy for others that I’ll wear myself thin. To the point where I HAVE to tap into narcissist mode in order to keep myself afloat. But I know deep down I could never be like my mother and I strive each and every day to correct myself. As long as you strive to be better than you were yesterday then I know you aren’t a full blown narcissist. I’ve dated quite a few as well and those people have proven to myself that im not too far gone like them and it makes me sad for them but they’ll never care so long as they go untreated.
Having traits associated with npd doesn't make you a narcissist any more than having traits with bpd would make you borderline. You are just associating toxic or harmful behaviors as narcissism
While certain personality and mental disorders do require patience and understanding, it is dangerous to expect someone to do that for a narcissist day in and day out. You lose yourself in the process. Lose your dignity, self-respect, and self-worth.
Absolutely! In the end it is only possible to salvage yourself and become healthy by leaving if they do not submit to finding real help and become able to change.
It took me years to realise my EX was a narcissist. She pretty much destroyed my self worth and blocked all personal development and it took me years to come back from it.
this is why i stopped dating 14 years ago. best decision I ever made. Not only are they crazy, but the law always takes their side. get me out of here!!!!!
I used to think the narc was only hurting me, then my children started to tell me they hated the way mom would hit me, and they were getting hit too. Children are more amazing than we give them credit for. Mom packed up and left in the middle of the night 1500 miles away, only after she was done using and abusing us until she was ready for the next supply. Don’t think your children will be spared, a narcissist can and will walk away from you and any children you have on a whim, mine are 5 and 7, we will be in therapy for a very long time. Hope this helps someone’s family from reaching the same fate…don’t tolerate any abuse, they won’t change and YOU and THE CHILDREN could end up equally treated and discarded.
Be grateful every day that she walked away. It’ll give your wonderful kids a fighting chance. You may also want to look at your traits that allowed you to stay in a relationship with someone who hit you, scared your children, and hit them as well. Sometimes both males and females will get away from a narcissist relationship only to get back into another one.
I agree, that’s what the therapy is for. I am not blameless in my inaction and it’s something that keeps me up at night. I’m trying to do the right thing for us from this point forward. I can’t change the past.
My narc started to dress like me, cut and styled her hair the same, when others noticed and mocked her she went ballistic and blamed me. She then befriended my recently ex boyfriend (who worked at the same company) and set him up with our new coworker (whom sat with me, as I was training her) very awkward when he came to visit. My narc flooded HR and my boss with letters of complaint about me (I stopped speaking to her for five years) in the end I was pushed out, fired after taking two weeks sick leave, she wouldn't let up that I was the problem, it was relentless. She won.The squeakiest wheel gets the most oil. It was my dream job.
I had damn near the exact same story as yours even down to her doing the same hair style etc and trying to hook my boyfriend at the time up with another coworker. They will try to get your man and if they can't they will try to hook him up with someone else. She also spread vicious lies and rumors behind my back and to my boss and got me fired. She was the most evil person I had ever met, but she came packaged in pure kindness and innocence. The initial red flag was her obsessive need for attention. She would also go ballistic if she found out any man was interested in me. I would find out when it was too late that she had spread disgusting lies about me behind my back to them, while smiling in my face. I found out she would pay the men a visit who were initially nice and flirty with me or who had a nice amount of respect for me. Then the next time I spoke with them on the phone or saw them out, they would go off on me and accuse me of things I never said or did. I would literally be in shock It took me awhile to figure out she was the common denominator to these incidents. Once we started working together, I saw the same things happening to other girls that her and I were friends with and they would ask me what the hell she was saying to their guy friends. Then I started thinking back to my string of guy friends reacting the same after she paid them a visit and I knew it was definitely her. People even started coming to me telling me how evil she was and that she was spreading lies. Only a few know how crazy she was and they were afraid of her The sad part is, that when you try to defend yourself against a narc, people really dig in and believe the narc, because they play extreme victim. They reverse roles and make it seem like u are the evil one doing all the bad things and they play victim. I didn't learn until long after her, wtf I had encountered and how to deal with them. She was the worst. I also uncovered some in my family. It's crazy! I say all this to let you know, it may look like the narc won, but she didn't. The really evil one I dealt with has finally gotten her karma many years later. I don't know wtf happened to her, but I saw a few pictures and I'm still speechless. I never gloated, because that's her thing, but I'm so glad I'm far away from her. Be glad u are no longer near her in a working environment or anything. She didn't win. Learn the lessons, put up boundaries, cut people off as soon as u feel the red flags and stay away from them
Your own words are twisted, distorted and manipulated against you. Use your words cautiously. They prefer texting over phone calls. Why? So they can share the gossip.
One tactic I've noticed is that when you stop talking to them, they can begin talking at you, and in the workplace, there is an aspect of plausible deniability. For instance, she may resort to asking questions she doesn't need the answer to.
Yes, narcissistic personality is on a spectrum. And it is a survival mechanism from the very start. But when it becomes pathological, there in lies problem.
I hate the fact that I am accused of this any time I express myself. Grateful for having friends who tell me that I don't have to apologize for actually having feelings.
They try to self disgnose you and gaslight you by saying your mentally unstable, or being to agressive. While you just dont agree to what they say. They will also use your children as pawns to control, keep, or hurt you. They will think that their childrens feelings and emotions are one. They will feel entitled to set boundaries for themselves while not respecting yours.
"You are too agressive!" Oh Hell yes! My narcissist said this all the time!!! Also, "I don't feel safe with you." Cause when I was too cheap to pay for everything she wanted or disagreed with her then she didn't feel safe. A woman wants a man to feel safe by being masculine but a narcissist wants a man who agrees with her all the time and pays for almost everything. It is basically the opposite of being masculine. This drove me to be more codependent. By the end of the relationship when the narcissist discarded me I was a pityful helpless emasculated little boy.
@@Astrobrite-Carpet-Cleaning can I ask how your feeling now mate? I've just had 5 years of the same and now she's finished with me I'm like a lost little boy
This is so true, they will try to diagnose you and call you a narcissist before even knowing wtf that is 😂😂😂 so fucking draining trying to get them to see what they are doing…. It’s all about them and because you want peace, you will fold and go along with it. This is where they take your masculinity away from you and when then relationship is done, you will feel small and worth nothing!
I was with an ex whom if I pushed hard enough against her demands, she would just suddenly say "Okay, I don't want to date you anymore." I always called out her bluff and said alright well it was a pleasure dating you goodbye and she would backtrack and say "No that's not what I meant!"
I’m so glad I work from home, therefore, completely avoiding anyone who might have narcissistic personality disorder. My job role is very flexible & provide a great deal of independence. But when I use to work in a call center environment, omg I was surrounded by a pack of narcissists.
The topic is about the demonic woman. An important video for young men, especially, in u.s. of A. Most of yall lost yall minds because of the feminist movement and men wonder why these narcissistic chicks move and act the same
I had a narccisist friend. I got tired of trying to fix things between her. It was all about looking good and only having friends that benefit her. She did almost everything in this video.🤦
It’s not bad to only have friends who benefit you. Time is money and life is about equal give and take. Why talk to someone who will waste your time for such long time? People will leave you feeling emotionally depleted if you don’t learn when to pull back from giving them so much of your time :)
I wasn’t aware until i was a victim of it. One of my best friends was a narcissist which I wasn’t aware but in one point in our daily conversations I realised that she was a jealousy and competitive person which kind of shocked me but I was devastated to know that she was the cause for everything what I was going through and for my suffering. She was not just jealousy and competitive ,she had all negative behaviours like manipulating and lying habits to win over others. She’s a most dangerous person who is a narcissist I have come across, she was a eye opener for me but sadly after many damages. Your information is 💯 accurate and have subscribed your channel as well Thx.
AND BELIEVE IT OR NOT TO THIS DAY SHE HAS NOT CHANGED A BIT BUT NOW THAT I UNDERSTAND WHAT NPD IS ALL ABOUT I NOW KNOW THAT I WAS NEVER THE PROBLEM IT WAS JEALOUSY AND ENVY ALL ALONG ON HER PART SHE WAS EVEN JESLOUS OF HER OWN DAUGTHER I PEOPLE WITH NPD WILL HAVE YOU THINKING THAT ITS YOU BUT THEYRE THE PROBLEM TO THE CORE
Hello, pretty solid video. Where you went wrong is you covered women being Grandiose (Overt). The research would show that most women are Vulnerable (Covert). This is why there's a false statistic that 75% of Narcissists are Men. It's incorrect because most men abused by a Narc aren't going to tell anyone and most therapists either aren't well trained in Covert Narcissism or she manipulates her way through therapy, undetected and undiagnosed. I would also add that she could be a hybrid of both and also have comorbid traits of other Cluster B things like Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD is significant in women vs men), and several others. Have a great day.
Interesting that you don’t consider the BPD statistics to also be gendered and flawed. Many women are falsely disagnosed with BPD due to sexist beliefs.
Narcissist co-workers are an absolute drain on your work day. I worked with one who always complained that everyone was 'out to get her' and her ex-husband was 'still in love with her'. She was a low-quality worker that was chronically late for work and returned late from lunch daily. That's why HR had discussions with her about her performance. And her ex-husband was texting, emailing and calling her because she was refusing to finalize there divorce and dodging his attorney. But the best was her birthday. She came to work in what looked like a prom dress, with a Birthday sash and a crown. She beamed all day, didn't really work, and was beyond elated and taking selfies when the office presented her with a her Birthday cake. (Everyone got a birthday cake for their Birthday-duh) It was so weird.
Oh it is possible. Very possible. I was married to a covert narcissist for 34 years. It’s just not possible to have a HEALTHY relationship with one. It is also impossible to hang on to your self respect and your own mental health in the long term.
People who don't end up in relationships with narcissists are usually better at filtering them out before things get serious. Learn how to spot red flags.
Thanks so much for breaking this down in a concise and compassionate way. I appreciate what you do. I’m struggling with my wife, who I love very much, and want to keep our family together (4 wonderful daughters). I am patient and supportive.. it’s good to know that we’re not alone and it’s a huge benefit simply coming to an understanding when one is taking some major internal damage on the reg.
Like me, the worst is when you were just a friend, but then worked for them. She couldn't stand to see me happy. Her biggest fear was my total independence, which I achieved. All i got was egging of my car. I never knew of this disruption in people's minds!!
My on and off (currently the latter and probably forever now) girlfriend is a complete narcissist. I didnt realise. But there were so many red flags. I chose to ignore them because now and again when we are together, its literally perfect. There were other times. Other times when... she literally broke me. Put me down. Hurt me. She has no empathy. She almost intentionally hurts me I believe. I don't think that she's subconsciously hurting me. I believe she does it on purpose. She made me question my morals. My lifestyle. My looks. My self worth. She is a monster.
PERSONALLY I BELIEVE ONLY PRAYER AND GOD CAN CHANGE THESE PEOPLE THEY TRULY CANNOT HELP THEMSELVES I AM SO BLESSED TO HAVE BEEN RAISED BY A MOTHE THAT DISPLAYED REAL KINDNESS AND GUINE EMPATHY
I remind my daughters constantly they are not crazy, it's not them and just hang in there. I was the problem, but since we divorced the problem still exists. The focus has just shifted onto the girls now.
I like that this is focused on women even though its pretty much the same for both sexes. But men that need help are more likely to click on this. Most people think of only men when the topic is discussed. ❤
An admirable analysis, of probably 85%, of that which I experienced; from an old girlfriend. I don't need to explain further surely. I must have watched "tons of" videos about this subject. I won't insult your intelligence; by describing their presentations ☺ Furthermore. Yours is easily the BEST I've seen. I liked the style of drawing the subject matter at hand; section by section. Then stopping for reflection; and carrying on with its excellent suggestions. So It only needs me to give you thanks; and tell you I've subscribed. Regards from Kensington and Chelsea; in London. 🇬🇧 🤝 🇺🇸
Having one of these in the family I can confirm all that has been said and the comments do too. Because it's family we have had to try and live with it no matter how hard. However now and again I blow and cannot hold back any longer. The delusion of the narcissist is amazing and months after I have pointed out a trait which was totally denied and been attacked for stating it she admits it??? For now!
I'm a guy who had a one time date with a very beautiful woman . She wanted me to pick her up at an EXACT TIME and when I was ten minutes late , she berated me for being late . This was the first strike against her . We went to see the movie "MEDIUM COOL" , which I thought SUCKED ! this is ths second strike against her as she wanted to see this movie . Then after the movie , we got into an argument and at one time she says "Oh , I am sooo beautiful !" This was the third strike against her as that told me that she was madly in love with herself. Her actions let me know that she was narcisstic and was not able to love someone else . This became my only date with her ! My mother told me that this woman cried one time because "SHE DIDN'T GET HER WAY "!!!
Just get out of there because it will only get worse once you see the traits it’s time to get out there is no making them better or explaining how horrific their behaviours are they are selfish manipulators & very good at lying and gaslighting as pleasant as anything when they want something spiteful and rage when they don’t get their own way the abuse escalates please get out now and don’t look back just disappear if you can she will start a slander and defamation campaign against you to try sway others the problem is you & the only way to deal with them is leave! I wasted years of my life trying to appease these sorts of lunatics!
I am an emphat raised by narcissist mother. I ended up marrying a narcissist, who i divorced and kater he died of cardiac arrest. I went to major councelings due to lack of confidence and felt the entire world was against me at that time. Thanks to my Wonderful therapist who i continued my 4 years of therapy, teached me about narcissists and the damages i overcame, finally i started to understand about narcissism and consequences. I realized that i had nothing wrong with me. But i need to be constantly in alert, and hope who rwad this also stay alert because wvery new friend, male or female tend to be 90% narcissists, and need to focus on reading their next step before they use you....😅
I wholeheartedly agree with this presentation. The only thing I want to add is everything said here that female narcissists do, the male narcissists do too. My mother was a narcissist and a single parent and you nailed everything about her. Now I'm living with and dating my best friend with benefits, of 22 years. My mother loved him for me. It wasn't until we had been together 3-4 months when I saw it. The gaslighting, shifting of blame, and creating narratives to give you a false truth. My mother and my man both display every trait you name here. I would love to see a video detailing what happens when a narcissist dates a narcissist. I wonder will the male dominate.
My mother is a narcissist. I have been told that people seek partners that are like their mother in personality. My brothers gf is a spitting image of my mother. I got lucky with my wife. 😊
I have recently left my church to attend another due to a Narc's behaviour. They singled me out for what ever reason, honestly, there is no reason. They then enlisted others to attack me via gossip, character & reputation assissination, which ultimately effected my mariage & my wife & I's business. I took this all to the Pastor who minimised my accustaions & made me feel like i needed a psychiatrist. My whole statement stayed on his desk, even after insisting that he showed it to other senior leaders of the church who i knew would take me seriously. Nothing ever happened, so i left. I pity the next person who falls victim to this woman, as she has now been enabled & enboldened by the whole ordeal. ps, i DO NOT blame the church!, Just because Jesus forgives those sins we present to him, it does not mean we are perfect, improved or even any better than we were beforehand.
Organized religion has to keep his minions under control. In my experience some pastors use people to do their bidding and control everyone that they possibly can
I’m so sorry the church failed yet again. I too have suffered greatly at the hands of the church and the wolves in the pulpit. I could write a book. What I wanted to share with you was related to the latter section of your comment starting at “just because Jesus forgives”, to the end of your comment. If Jesus forgives a person, while it might not be instantaneous but rather an ongoing process called sanctification where He begins to clean you up and root the sin out of your life. If someone asks Jesus for forgiveness and that process of sanctification does not soon follow, then maybe the person was not serious or only half serious about being forgiven to begin with. God knows when someone is seeking Him wholeheartedly and answers that call and creates in that person a clean heart and gives that person His Spirit. And unless a person is born of that Spirit, they will never enter the kingdom of God.(John3:5) And unless a person who has hurt you comes and asks for your forgiveness, please don’t believe that the Biblical thing to do is to forgive them. The wolves in the church today twist Scripture to control and abuse the congregation. The church is being dismantled ever increasingly by those the Book of Jude warned us about, “those who crept in unawares. The present themselves as sheep but are actually ravenous wolves. The true sheep in the church today are being led to the slaughter. The Whole Truth cannot be found in most churches today because the infiltration is almost entirely complete and the end times “falling away” has long been underway. If there’s anything in this world that is worth accomplishing before we die, I would say it’s this One thing and that is finding Jesus, knowing beyond a shadow of a doubt that you’ve found Him and and laying hold of Him. I just realized your comment is several months old so I don’t know if you will ever see this but I’m gonna pray that you do and that you don’t hold Jesus responsible for the hateful attacks that you suffered in His house because that’s exactly what it was designed to do.
Hint: she engages in the dark arts, loves death, uses coke, is an alcoholic, has an eating disorder, abusive in all forms, ruins anything healthy, performs spells to break up good people, binds you by having children with her, and thrives on a materialistic, superficial lifestyle by using her body to seduce you but is never satisfied and will drain you body, soul & mind. Eat the apple and you eventually become her: the walking dead. She is easily recognizable by her devil/crazy eyes and taunts the innocent about what she’s done as her main purpose in life is to be the devils enforcer and she’s loyal to her mission. She lies, cheats & steals and will kill you softly and your former self will become a distant memory and has absolutely zero remorse for what she’s done. She is the selfish narc.
I married a narcissist and my sister is one of the best narcissist I ever seen in my life!!! I can see it in other people but bc she’s my sister it’s so hard to let her go!
I want to look good in the eyes of others because i feel safe that way. I hate others hating me, picking on me, comment on me. I’m so scared of fights too. If everyone feels i’m good, then i’ll be in my safe zone where i can live peacefully. I never belittle anyone, i never brag about my accomplishments instead i’ll understate them because I don’t want attention much.
Thanks for the video. I'm appalled by the way my ex Patricia meets EVERY SINGLE TRAIT pointed out in this video. Because of her emotional blackmailing, I've been stuck in a bullshit with that piece of shit from late 2010 up to late 2013. I broke up with her no less than five times, and whenever she saw my life was doing good enough without having her punk ass around, she tried her best (or worst, depending on the point of view) to keep me from moving on. To that end, she resorted to vilifying and victim playing tactics, always calling me a "disloyal" man, and saying I "never loved" her", and later stressing "how much" she was "suffering" because I was basically living my life. She used those tactics intermitently and non-stop, but always coming up with something new, whenever she noticed I realized her shit was getting old. For those of y'all who once had a stalker, and those who had been manipulated by a skilled manipulator, y'all do know that shit goes deeper than a mere YT comment can go. Once she had what she wanted - i.e., having me come back with her as a boyfriend -, she'd follow up with Pavlovian ups-and-downs manipulation tactics, bringing arguments and psychodrama to the relationship whenever things were supposed to be calm (that is, most of the time), and turning down the heat and chilling whenever she saw I was about to get out of that relationship. I'm happy I managed to boot her ass far away from my life. Nowadays, she calls herself a "psychologist". I feel sorry for her patients, and I genuinely fear for their welfare.
I was married to a male malignant narcissist, it's sheer hell to deal with these people! It took 3 divorce attempts and a permanent restraining order (which he violated) to get him out of my life. Glad you're out of the situation!
This is the first video I've seen that has a positive approach, when it comes to this subject. Most of them like to make a villain out of the narcissist and how to recognize their traits so you can get away from them, demonize them and exclude them from your circle of friends. This has a solution based compassionate approach. I like that.
Yeah most make a caricature out of the narcissist online and have people seeing narcissists everywhere they look. A "deep narcissist" is a better analysis because it delineates from normal narcissistic traits all people have and the true toxic narcissist that is a vicious cold blooded manipulator that has a high degree of psychopathy to go along with it. The misuse of this term has almost robbed it of all meaning and when I hear it I always question whether there is any validity to the claim. My ex was a true deep narcissist who had that psychopathy that made her dangerous and highly toxic so I know the difference and have the scars to prove it. She is not typical though and an extreme by any standard. She ticks all the boxes and leaves no room for doubt.
@@annebonnyssister absolutely, especially if they are extremely high on psychopathy to go along with it. Birth giver is an interesting term and I understand the reluctance to use the other term. Mine is also a severe deep narcissist and I haven't spoken to her in two years either. I have never felt better. It sounds like you and I have had some similar history in that regard. Understanding this subject helps you find healthy relationships and helps you understand why you attract others with those traits too. I am a magnet for them unfortunately due to my personality type.
Watch out for the overly kind people pleasers. They appear as codeps but are dangerous. Codep or narc, not much difference. NB: There's another way to state your purpose. They seek to please those who mistreat them and do not people please the ones who treat them well.
My sister who’s 8yrs younger than I, the youngest of us 4girls & was always the CENTER-of-attention as we were growing up. When I was about to turn 17, my mother had remarried to man closer to my age than her own; my sister then was only 8yrs old so the new step-dad ‘adopted’ her as his own. My mother abandoned me, LEFT ME @the curb, me running after the car as they drove away for Cali(from Oregon)….well, the youngest sister became step dads little ‘idol’. He spoiled her something ROTTEN. Step dad had become violent w/my mom…but SOMEHOW this youngest sister ALWAYS came away scratch free, while sister#2 would attempt to protect mom thus getting put in hospital herself, while sister #3 ran & hid(left home @only15). This youngest sister had learned how to control, manipulate, and even seduce her own step dad;to avoid his wrath yet gain everything she’d always wanted. My mom and youngest sister moved back to Oregon 7yrs after moms life @risk from the violent step dad. Mom was a chronic alcoholic. Youngest sister started smoking cigs(paid for by step dad(@12, drugs shortly followed. She was an ADDICT of many things until she hit bottom, ten years ago. She’s ‘clean’, well clean from drug & alcohol addiction that is; but quickly traded that addiction for SELF worship. She was taught by 12-step program that SHE MUST choose a higher power, it could be anything, so she chose self. She has become, BY FAR THE WORSE kind of narcissist th3 world has seen….well, BUT SEE SHE WAS ALWAYS a narc. She’s even admitted to me that she seduced her step dad. When I attempted to tell her “but no, you were the victim, you were a child,you were neglected and taken advantage of”…In middle of her drug rehab she’d said, “Oh no, I KNEW exactly what I was doing, and I like it, and I didn’t care if my actions hurt my mom(by seducing her husband)”! This 50yr old sister today is putting me thru the WRINGER w/her gaslighting, manipulation, control, me me me, wah, wah, wah…bullshit. She’s hurt me so badly by LITERALLY rejecting ANYTHING that I say, express, desire or even, YES SHE DENIES MY NEEDS. real needs, not wants, but actual NEEDS. I’m chronically ill, horribly, pain fatigue weakness, major depressive disorder..@ all’s she does is shame me for it. I now currently despise her…I cannot feel love for her any more, as she’s been so oppressive to me….
Please get far away from her!! So what if she is your blood. It's called narcissistic sibling abuse There are videos on it. Their behavior will literally kill you if you don't get away and cut them off for good. You will start to feel free Sometimes they discard you in your biggest moment of need before you go completely no contact. It's meant to destroy you, but you actually feel better Once you go no contact, your health will start to improve, and you will start seeing your life as if you are a totally different person discovering who you are without all that toxicity that has been with you since a child. Please just get away from her. Sending prayers your way✨✨✨
Why do you even allow her in your life? Loneliness is no excuse if that’s it. Better alone than friend OR family like that. I cut people out of my life who are like that and let God sort it out. People like that don’t know how to love anyone (because they don’t really even love theirselves) and there is just nothing you can really do about it. You will cut your own life short if you let them stay in your world. “Hope deferred makes a heart sick.” Proverbs 13:12. Your hope she changes after 50 years will only kill you.
Be careful… she’ll put you in a nursing home, befriend the whole staff to keep you there and take all your assets! She’ll have that nursing home believing she’s a saint and dear sister to you! I’ve seen it before.
@@ReasonablySpeaking9808 wow!! That is happening in my family right now. All of it!! Except I'm not the one she put in a nursing home and she took all of their money before placing them in a nursing home. The staff loves her and thinks she's such a caring person 😟
Had a friend very insecure use to ask me what I was wearing to every event we attended together then down played her outfit ask we to do the same however was very much dress to the tee at the event ! And was very surprised I decided to change my outfit and was just as dress as she was ! Once she ask me to bring my clothes to her house and get dress !
Double mint twins...this disorder is something else. I love how they become the best version of you and everyone believes them. Lies are so praised these days.
I was all behind your video until you said at the very end,”it’s not impossible to have a relationship with a narcissist”. You obviously have never been on the receiving end of their abuse in an intimate relationship. It’s pure hell on earth. Torture the Geneva Convention would deem to severe and inhumane.
What is love without commitment, communication, loyalty, respect, integrity, truth, gratitude ? Simply human relationships. People are delusional about love, as they are delusional about themselves. Unrealistic expectations from humanity. People treat other people as disposable objects. People don't care about truth, all they crave for is attention, validation, praises and power over others. Cultivate your inner garden instead, and water it with peace. By doing that, you'll realize that you want to watch less and less TV or internet. That's free advice. Peace be with you.
I get sick of people by who talk about other people all the time instead of themself. Although people who talk about themselves constantly are tiresone too. Where is the happy medium? I think I just figured it out. In one to one contact each should show an interest in the other.
I could write a book about how horrible it is to be in a relationship with a female narcissist. To anyone reading this DO NOT IGNORE RED FLAGS! And be on alert for them because people put on a great image then show you their true side later.
As far as I can see, these traits and tactics are identical with those of men. I was with a narcissist for a decade and this all describes him perfectly. So I don't think that the gender actually matters.
My mother is a grandiose narcissist and they don't change and get worse with age and she always talked about herself alot and it let to me cutting her off because she thinks it's all about her and always seeks attention and is a drama queen. I cut her off and walked away
This is so so so accurate. No matter what she appears like/says--you will feel dissonance between her actions and intentions, and often times worse about yourself after interacting. You will be confused, question yourself and your notion of right-wrong-normal treatment, and often lonely: she cannot be vulnerable, give you authentic love, presence and attention because she is lives from a cognitive distortion of reality-victimhood complex which entitles her to be the center of the world and demand all relationships, people in her life to serve her needs--validation, praise, to mirror her perfection, which is what she needs to feel safe. Many women have strong narcissistic traits (its cultural I believe, advantageous and socially reinforced) but other women who are full on personality disordered--these are severely abused beginning in early childhood, usually by their own mothers, before they could build enough strength to heal and go beyond their families--so instead of learning healthy skills to grow and survive, they learn to hide, manipulate, fantasize to survive and connect to others, and then all their relationships follow this abuse dynamic becuase they dont really have a sense of self so they think everyone is a victim-bully-savior and live in constant power struggles.
I was adopted by a female last assist was absolutely living hell she befriended every single person I ever knew along with her husband, my late father he spent much of their money, trying to cover up all of the things I did to me as a child I went no contact three years ago best movie ever made in my life. There is no making a relationship with people that I have no remorse or no feelings.
Learning about narcissists now at the age pf 28 just to come to realisation i have always attracted narcissists in my life. No wonder i do not have any friends now.
It's better to have no friends than friends who secretly plot to destroy you out of jealousy because you are better than them in some way. You are who you are, and you can't help how people view you. Their the ones with the problem, not you. People who accept themselves the way they are aren't so easy to manipulate.
The fastest way to piss off a narcissist, is at some point they will be critical about things in your own personality. At that point just say to them: "Believe me....the last thing in the world I worry about is adjusting my personality to make you happy." If you do this with other's around, one or two might even have to stifle their laughter. Works everytime. They will be embarassed and enraged if they are narcissist, and if they are also psychopathic ( another Dark Triad" disorder), you have an enemy for life. In the workplace they will try to get you fired. Eventually HR will see they are just an angry person and toxic to keep around. And they will get fired. A person who is not a narcissist will not be angry at all, and may even go, "Touche." Suddenly ealizing that their criticism was petty and invalid, and that you just reminded them of that.
My ex was a master manipulator who played me for years, and looking back, I can’t believe I put up with it for so long. She slept with countless random guys and acted like nothing happened, like she didn’t emotionally and mentally stab me in the back every time.
One day, after a few great days together, I went to my college classes as usual. When I came back to her apartment, something felt off. The tense vibe, the way she spoke like she was hiding a secret made me nervous. Then there was a knock at the door. A young man walks in, announces himself, and casually acts like he lives there.
She’s upstairs in the shower and yells down, “Honey, did you just come in? I heard the door!” I answer, “No, I’m still here.” Then I turn to the guy and ask who he is and why he just walked in. He apologizes and says, “Oh, I was here all day with La- and I told her I had to drive my sister to work, but I can come back later if she’s free.”
At this point, I’m fuming but stay calm. I call up to her, “Hey, do you know someone named Scott?” She freezes and pretends not to know who he is. The guy then casually adds, “We were going at it all day, so she probably needed a shower to feel fresh.” That was it for me. I grabbed my jacket and left.
She ran after me in her bathrobe, begging me not to go, swearing he was her cousin and that I misunderstood. But there was nothing left to misunderstand. Four years of my life wasted on someone who didn’t care about me, my dreams, or my loyalty.
If you’re doubting your partner’s loyalty, sometimes an honest conversation isn’t enough to clear the air. I remember feeling lost, wondering if I was being paranoid or if something deeper was happening. Eventually, I reached out to a team that helped me uncover hidden truths messages, accounts, and everything I couldn’t figure out on my own. If you’re in a similar situation and need clarity, you can try contacting MetaspyClubLLC@gmail. com for guidance. Knowing the truth was painful, but it helped me move forward and finally focus on what I deserved: honesty, respect, and peace of mind.
Usually you feel really drained once done interacting with them.
💯
That's a big one. I live next door to a narc and I find the constant need she has for validation, which manifests as her only talking about herself, incredibly draining. She will phone and talk to me for an hour, talk about herself, moan about others and never once think to ask about me or my life, not even a 'How are you?'.
Yes, like emotional or spiritual vampires....
I had a deep friendship with someone like this for 11 yrs. It got worse as time progressed. I expressed that I felt tired and ask if she could not talk about things that were draining. Her response was: but you're my friend.
@@i_am_processing_ , it's classic, isn' it? Not a thought for you or your needs, all about them.
Being around narcs is EXHAUSTING and there is NO PEACE. CHAOS is a dark cloud that floats above them always.
Entitlement, self importance/self centered, lack of accountability, tantrums, blaming, disrespectful, and dishonest = any narcissist.
Right on
And she says ( I love you )
I would add hipocrisy as well.
Why does this sound like every woman every one of us has ever met to different degrees
Man makes me wan to cri
It is NOT possible to have a relationship with a narcissist.
So true❤ They don't even SEE you.
It is...just not a good one 😂
there is NO relationship...
A really bad unhealthy one
Merely soul theft.
@@Time2PayThePiper
I had a coworker who used to talk about herself all the time, including what diet she was on and what she ate, where she went, etc.
After wasting time listening to her describe what she had for lunch in great detail, i asked, "Do you want to know what I had for lunch?" She said, "Not really."
That pretty much said it all
Strong minds discuss ideas, average minds discuss events, weak minds discuss people.
Socrates
Wi know 2 one at work and another I've known for 20 years... taking pictures of food and description of what they ate or how much money they have is big
what Pompous Boobs they are!!
A good (and easy) acid test to detect a female narcissist is to talk about how beautiful or sexy another woman is. They will always find a way to put that woman down even if the woman is a famous movie star or model. The narcissist will even ridiculously claim that men have told her that she is even more beautiful. Narcissists are not only exhausting and needy, but they’re actually quite boring and predictable.
Thissss💯💯💯💯
The narc dudes are weirdly possive like that also any chicj you know like talk to they get extremely jealous we got a narcs in the closet problem lol 😂
This test is nuts, its maybe just a yellous girl? ..or a girl what expects his partner not to praise other woman in her presence?
@@MrIoes-xh4sr EXACTLY only a narcissistic, delusional woman would think she’s entitled to a compliment because someone else is receiving one. Incidentally these are women that I have no sexual relationship with at all and often times I’m talking to someone else and they butt in on the conversation. Apparently you fit the profile.
This sounds like you are trying to manipulate someone by observing what reaction they’ll give when you praise others.
My grandmother had an interesting proverb;
People are like a NEW BROOM which always sweeps well, but only at the beginning!!
Love it
I say that too! Every new broom sweeps good! And it’s TRUE!
Your grandma had a good proverb, like uncle iroh
I remember working with an entitled female narcissist who was very charming at first, she wore slightly revealing clothes, and behaved in a quite innocuous way at the beginning. It was only when things didn't go her way, and things started going my way that she started belittling, invalidating, and behaving in a very bossy way(she wasn't my boss). She asked me for help when she got laid off from her job, I helped her. I didn't know a lot about narcissism then. She was very kind and charming when she needed help, but after she got her help done, she went back to being rude and intimidating. It is only now after I have learned about narcissism, that I am able to let-go of this person mentally, I never understood why someone would blatantly use and throw others while backbiting them and insulting them and being fake nice to them in person when they needed them. The cherry on top of the cake is that she barely knows me as a person. Imagine people who are emotionally intertwined in deep relationships with her.
Indeed. Fascinating that it all can be real. But…it is.
They will try to delete them. Trust me. No remorse and get away because they have friends who do the same thing. It's competition.
I’ve had a few narcissistic do the exact same thing. They will gaslight u then when they are down in life? They actually will have the nerve too come to you for help!i told one to beat it and another one I said isn’t this ironic? U como g to me with Help Me…
Sounds like my mother-in-law. A gold digging, deceitful, abusive narcissist, who never took responsibility for mentally and physically abusing my husband as a child. I actually tried to have a relationship with her, even though my husband warned me she was fake and incapable of caring about anyone but herself. I was naive enough to think she had changed, and even told him I thought she did, but the mask slipped when her ego became bruised, because the abuse came up in conversation that she initiated. I realized then what a pathetic excuse of a woman she was, who could not take responsibility for her own cruel actions against her own child. As a mother, I would walk to the ends of the earth for my son, and cannot relate to abusive narcissistic people.
Amazing, I just went through this with one. It was unbelievable!!!!!!!
My ex wife was a narcissist I didn’t know it at first it was until the last three years of our marriage that she showed me her true colors.
It’s been roughly four years now and I’m scared stiff of getting into another relationship. At 57 I feel that being alone is the best possible outcome for me.
Same, I was married to a male one. It’s a different experience after them 🤬, but don’t deny yourself. You’re now filled with more tools and knowledge than you had before her, that’s my positive outlook on it.
Same buddy you’re not alone
Back in the day they were called spoiled brats and none of the men I knew tolerated this behavior.
I’m leaving a job because of this type of behaviour as it’s draining…
I just left my job because of this
I'm leaving my job because of this also.
My last day was about a week ago. Narc boss and flying monkeys.
Damn keep y'all heads up because people do be pulling this bullshit at work
Me too.
I’d suggest a major clarification about self-centeredness - a covert/vulnerable narcissist is not going to overtly make things about herself. She’s likely to want her target specifically to pay attention to her and gets it by training him behind the scenes through baiting, manipulation, and fear. She occasionally manipulates groups if she can do so subtly without being spotted, but if she knows she can’t do so without being detected she will make herself seem small - almost as if everyone around needs to perceive her as a harmless mouse.
Absolutely Spot on!
Dead azz
That is so true. My former BFF is a covert narc. I knew nothing about these folks at the beginning of our friendship, or else I would’ve spotted it earlier. Anyway, yes a covert narc wants to seem humble, self sacrificing and like the ultimate selfless caretaker. But underneath that is seething resentment, and a constant need for adoration. The phony self deprecating comments, and constant humble bragging about “all they’ve done” for other people is a huge red flag. Come to find out she constantly humble bragged about helping me, like I’m some kind of irresponsible idiot who can’t take care of myself. They thrive on being the hero / martyr / victim. And yes, folks who don’t really know her think she is harmless, so sweet. They have no idea who they’re really dealing with.
More simplified ways to dehumanized someone with a personality disorder and their entire existence as this. Every female covert is just this. I wonder if I'll ever see a day when people with npd are actually treated like anyone else with a personality disorder. Oh yeah I'm definitely spending all my time just manipulating people to give me admiration as if the awareness of it needing to be manipulated would make it feel genuine. Depression, anxiety, psychosis and other disorders just don't exist with a narcissist. We just feed off that 24/7. Like we are not humans and just survive off admiration and praise. Tell me, how does someone with npd and self awareness feel any motivation to even exist if this is what we are lumped into as if everyone with it is just a baseless stereotype associated with these behaviors
@@apatheticxmindsetx3549damn here you are trying to guilt trip strangers into feeling like you’re some type of victim because you’re a cover narcissist… almost as if you’re doing exactly what you’re claiming to not be doing 💀
And they are quick to call YOU a narcissist for seeing through their bullcrap and calling them out!
They hate ""NO"".They have zero respect for your boundaries!🙄
There is never enough patience, understanding, love, kindness, generosity or anything else to satisfy these demons ! They are just a bottomless pit that remains void in all areas and aspects of their life ! Evil, hateful, horrible creatures that will set the world on fire just to feel validated.
Marrying to a narcissist is a nightmare.. please avoid it..
Too late for me to avoid it!!😮
@@alfredoaraujo7756never too late for freedom.
@@alfredoaraujo7756 Yaa It's Too late For me also 😭
@@alfredoaraujo7756 just divorce and it's win already
I feel a bit scared for all the young men out there that are not aware of this behaviour, we need more awareness of this to protect people sanity ☘️❤️☘️
Do not forget the lack of empathy, because when that mask comes off it gets severely out of control!
HAHAHAH and it can come of QUICK! careful out there!
lol nailed it with this comment man. The fake image they present to you to buy into and then you say or do or not do something and the mask is off and the ride you are about to go on you will have never EVER thought possible.
It’s kind of contradictory to say that a narcissist ex admitted that to gaslighting. One of the behavior patterns of a narcissist is that they won’t admit fault on their own, and that they use gaslighting to convince you that they were never at fault. I can tell you what behavior of my narcissist ex led me to believe that I was being gaslighted though. Gaslighting is a real insidious way of manipulation- to make you believe that there is something wrong with you, that the actions/words of your narcissist weren’t really what they seemed to be. It makes you question your judgement, leading to you ignoring your instincts and senses. I swallowed all of her gaslighting for years, mostly because I wanted the relationship to work- like most people who have been the partner of a narcissist. I started realizing that something was wrong 6 months before I was discarded. It was actually this revelation that I had that led to the discard- once I started seeing through the illusion that she presented, I started to see all of her actions for what they really were, and I started to question her on everything and stood my ground on issues that I previously gave in on. We had gotten into a really bad argument. Tensions between us had been building for a few months. We had to move from our rental and find a new place to live within 2 months, in a town that was going through a surge in prices for rental properties. It was difficult finding a place to live that was within our budget, and still live in the town that had come to be our community. Between that and all of the normal logistics in moving cause a lot of minor arguments and stress between us- more than what was normal with her narcissistic and selfish behavior. We found a place, moved in and was in the process of bringing the final things over from the old place to the new place and cleaning the old place when we had gotten into an argument about something minor. All of the pent up tensions and resentment came out. During the argument, she was dismissive to me and told me that everything was my fault and if I didn’t like it then I could pack my shit and leave. I was so frustrated that I knocked her external computer monitor down (so she would face me and not continue to argue with her back turned to me). She got up and in my face and told me that I probably wanted to hit her. I said that I didn’t, I just wanted to discuss the issues. She said that if I wasn’t man enough to hit her she would give herself a black eye and call the police on me. I turned and left the room, because I knew the argument was escalating to a place that I didn’t;t want it to go. As I turned to leave the room, she jumped on me and started punching me. I told her if she was going to hit me, I would call the police. She started punching me again, so I left the room, went to the master bathroom and called the police. They came, interviewed both of us and arrested her for spousal battery. Afterwards she only blamed me for the incident and never, never acknowledged that she hit me. A week or so later, she asked me to write a letter to the DA requesting that the charges be dropped. I said that I would write a letter but that she would have to acknowledge her actions and to apologize to me first. She said that she was sorry that I felt that way. I told her that I wouldn’t write anything to the DA, and she stormed off, giving me the silent treatment for a couple of days. I knew what happened, and have a very clear recollection of the events. I’ve been punched before with closed fists, and I know what it feels like- and it doesn’t feel like a “shove”, what she insisted was what she did (her story was that she shoved me only after I shoved her, which was nonsense). I got a copy of the police report, and one of several reasons that they arrested her is because they found her knuckles red and swollen. I tried to move through this, but she kept trying to change the narrative of what happened when I was very clear on what happened. I felt crazy, but knew that I wasn’t. This led me to question everything else that she told me. Once I started realizing that most things she told me (when it came to disagreements or things that I had an issue with) were lies, and I believed the illusion that she created to trick me. That’s what the narcissist does- they present an illusion to you. Just like looking at an optical illusion, once you see that it is a trick of the eyes, you can’t look at it again without seeing the trick. Once I started seeing through her illusions, the house of cards that she built started to fall down and I slowly started to realize the type of person that she was, even though I didn’t want to believe it. I started enforcing my boundaries and that drove her crazy and caused more fights and gaslighting, which is what I believe led to her finally discarding me 6 months after her arrest. She never admitted to gaslighting me though. Even after confronting her with things from years previous that I realized she changed to make me the one at fault, she stays with her story. Even with indisputable proof, she stays with her version of events and says everyone else is wrong. Don’t expect any type of satisfaction or closure from a narcissist, because you won’t get any. You have to believe your judgment and instinct, and not tie your self-worth and self-esteem to anything that they say to you. Additionally, If you ever suspect your partner is cheating on you give it a try and remotely access their phone. I had to follow my instincts and get in touch with this private investigator Metaspyhub@gmail. com who gave me unrestricted access my partner device.
may i ask how stressed out the lady was while your relationship? has nothing to do with you
Damn bro I just wasted all this time and it ended up being a spam comment lmao
They also have many double standards: they can, you can't
💯.
Woman I’m general
Sounds exactly like my narc aunt.
Defend yourself against the abuse double standards abd manipulation lies and yes immediately the victim becomes the narc for speaking up lol human trafficking kidnapping kyimh about everything cowards evil who have abused our light and gifts to waste them on stupid things wheh we are fighting to get others healed and lifted up only the fake families are to be lifted up every one else even if your funding them is dog shit on their shoes
This!
I just realized I was in a relationship with a female narcissist. It was exhausting and stressful
It's most of the women you've ever dated because that's just the nature of women
Thank you for not characterizing narcissism as only NPD. It’s a personality trait that exists on a spectrum. Though we all need a healthy level of narcissism to maintain confidence on our journey of personal growth, there is an observable pattern of behaviour in people with more abundant or unchecked narcissistic personality traits, and this pattern of behaviour can be extremely damaging to more vulnerable personality types. You don’t have to be diagnosed with a full-blown malignant personality disorder in order to be a narcissist who causes harm to others.
Dead ass
This comment is my favorite comment while combing through videos on this topic because it’s TRUE. I was raised by a narcissist and I can’t deny that I’ve picked up on some of my mothers traits (as one does with parents because they’re our “role models”) but one way I know I’m not a full blown narcissist is because I will literally catch myself and that’s something narcissists are incapable of doing. Sometimes I feel so much empathy for others that I’ll wear myself thin. To the point where I HAVE to tap into narcissist mode in order to keep myself afloat. But I know deep down I could never be like my mother and I strive each and every day to correct myself. As long as you strive to be better than you were yesterday then I know you aren’t a full blown narcissist. I’ve dated quite a few as well and those people have proven to myself that im not too far gone like them and it makes me sad for them but they’ll never care so long as they go untreated.
It’s both . Ur I understand what you mean because I don’t think u need to b sick to have some of these characteristics .
Having traits associated with npd doesn't make you a narcissist any more than having traits with bpd would make you borderline. You are just associating toxic or harmful behaviors as narcissism
While certain personality and mental disorders do require patience and understanding, it is dangerous to expect someone to do that for a narcissist day in and day out. You lose yourself in the process. Lose your dignity, self-respect, and self-worth.
Absolutely! In the end it is only possible to salvage yourself and become healthy by leaving if they do not submit to finding real help and become able to change.
It took me years to realise my EX was a narcissist. She pretty much destroyed my self worth and blocked all personal development and it took me years to come back from it.
I'm currently in the process of digging myself out of that hell hole.
Usually, they never miss an opportunity to tell you how incapable you are of doing anything right. Been there.
this is why i stopped dating 14 years ago. best decision I ever made.
Not only are they crazy, but the law always takes their side.
get me out of here!!!!!
The female narcissist is most dangerous when being called out / exposed…it’s a hell of a ride for the poor bastard who loved her after that!
I used to think the narc was only hurting me, then my children started to tell me they hated the way mom would hit me, and they were getting hit too. Children are more amazing than we give them credit for. Mom packed up and left in the middle of the night 1500 miles away, only after she was done using and abusing us until she was ready for the next supply. Don’t think your children will be spared, a narcissist can and will walk away from you and any children you have on a whim, mine are 5 and 7, we will be in therapy for a very long time. Hope this helps someone’s family from reaching the same fate…don’t tolerate any abuse, they won’t change and YOU and THE CHILDREN could end up equally treated and discarded.
Be grateful every day that she walked away. It’ll give your wonderful kids a fighting chance. You may also want to look at your traits that allowed you to stay in a relationship with someone who hit you, scared your children, and hit them as well. Sometimes both males and females will get away from a narcissist relationship only to get back into another one.
I agree, that’s what the therapy is for. I am not blameless in my inaction and it’s something that keeps me up at night. I’m trying to do the right thing for us from this point forward. I can’t change the past.
My narc started to dress like me, cut and styled her hair the same, when others noticed and mocked her she went ballistic and blamed me. She then befriended my recently ex boyfriend (who worked at the same company) and set him up with our new coworker (whom sat with me, as I was training her) very awkward when he came to visit. My narc flooded HR and my boss with letters of complaint about me (I stopped speaking to her for five years) in the end I was pushed out, fired after taking two weeks sick leave, she wouldn't let up that I was the problem, it was relentless. She won.The squeakiest wheel gets the most oil. It was my dream job.
Dam
I had damn near the exact same story as yours even down to her doing the same hair style etc and trying to hook my boyfriend at the time up with another coworker. They will try to get your man and if they can't they will try to hook him up with someone else.
She also spread vicious lies and rumors behind my back and to my boss and got me fired. She was the most evil person I had ever met, but she came packaged in pure kindness and innocence.
The initial red flag was her obsessive need for attention. She would also go ballistic if she found out any man was interested in me. I would find out when it was too late that she had spread disgusting lies about me behind my back to them, while smiling in my face.
I found out she would pay the men a visit who were initially nice and flirty with me or who had a nice amount of respect for me. Then the next time I spoke with them on the phone or saw them out, they would go off on me and accuse me of things I never said or did. I would literally be in shock
It took me awhile to figure out she was the common denominator to these incidents. Once we started working together, I saw the same things happening to other girls that her and I were friends with and they would ask me what the hell she was saying to their guy friends. Then I started thinking back to my string of guy friends reacting the same after she paid them a visit and I knew it was definitely her.
People even started coming to me telling me how evil she was and that she was spreading lies. Only a few know how crazy she was and they were afraid of her
The sad part is, that when you try to defend yourself against a narc, people really dig in and believe the narc, because they play extreme victim. They reverse roles and make it seem like u are the evil one doing all the bad things and they play victim.
I didn't learn until long after her, wtf I had encountered and how to deal with them. She was the worst.
I also uncovered some in my family. It's crazy!
I say all this to let you know, it may look like the narc won, but she didn't.
The really evil one I dealt with has finally gotten her karma many years later.
I don't know wtf happened to her, but I saw a few pictures and I'm still speechless. I never gloated, because that's her thing, but I'm so glad I'm far away from her.
Be glad u are no longer near her in a working environment or anything. She didn't win. Learn the lessons, put up boundaries, cut people off as soon as u feel the red flags and stay away from them
No, it was almost your dream job. Your actual dream job will not include the likes of her 😊❤
How did you first meet her?
@@thealchemist333 How was she different in the pictures you saw that made you think she didn’t win?
Thank you for not trying to promote a crappy product at the beginning of the video! You are spot on with this video! ❤
Your own words are twisted, distorted and manipulated against you. Use your words cautiously. They prefer texting over phone calls. Why? So they can share the gossip.
One tactic I've noticed is that when you stop talking to them, they can begin talking at you, and in the workplace, there is an aspect of plausible deniability. For instance, she may resort to asking questions she doesn't need the answer to.
this is female narcissism yet this related perfectly with me dealing with male narcissists .
Yes, narcissistic personality is on a spectrum. And it is a survival mechanism from the very start. But when it becomes pathological, there in lies problem.
I hate the fact that I am accused of this any time I express myself. Grateful for having friends who tell me that I don't have to apologize for actually having feelings.
They try to self disgnose you and gaslight you by saying your mentally unstable, or being to agressive. While you just dont agree to what they say. They will also use your children as pawns to control, keep, or hurt you. They will think that their childrens feelings and emotions are one. They will feel entitled to set boundaries for themselves while not respecting yours.
"You are too agressive!" Oh Hell yes! My narcissist said this all the time!!! Also, "I don't feel safe with you." Cause when I was too cheap to pay for everything she wanted or disagreed with her then she didn't feel safe. A woman wants a man to feel safe by being masculine but a narcissist wants a man who agrees with her all the time and pays for almost everything. It is basically the opposite of being masculine. This drove me to be more codependent. By the end of the relationship when the narcissist discarded me I was a pityful helpless emasculated little boy.
@@Astrobrite-Carpet-Cleaning can I ask how your feeling now mate? I've just had 5 years of the same and now she's finished with me I'm like a lost little boy
This is so true, they will try to diagnose you and call you a narcissist before even knowing wtf that is 😂😂😂 so fucking draining trying to get them to see what they are doing…. It’s all about them and because you want peace, you will fold and go along with it.
This is where they take your masculinity away from you and when then relationship is done, you will feel small and worth nothing!
@@Astrobrite-Carpet-CleaningJesus this rings true man 😞
I was with an ex whom if I pushed hard enough against her demands, she would just suddenly say "Okay, I don't want to date you anymore." I always called out her bluff and said alright well it was a pleasure dating you goodbye and she would backtrack and say "No that's not what I meant!"
I’m so glad I work from home, therefore, completely avoiding anyone who might have narcissistic personality disorder. My job role is very flexible & provide a great deal of independence. But when I use to work in a call center environment, omg I was surrounded by a pack of narcissists.
A lady at work was always talking about herself..it was always about her..she didnt want to hear about what anybody else did.
These are literally basic and classic signs of a narcissist in general, not simply a FEMALE narcissist.
Thank you....that's the same thing I said.
The topic is about the demonic woman. An important video for young men, especially, in u.s. of A. Most of yall lost yall minds because of the feminist movement and men wonder why these narcissistic chicks move and act the same
I had a narccisist friend. I got tired of trying to fix things between her. It was all about looking good and only having friends that benefit her. She did almost everything in this video.🤦
It’s not bad to only have friends who benefit you. Time is money and life is about equal give and take. Why talk to someone who will waste your time for such long time? People will leave you feeling emotionally depleted if you don’t learn when to pull back from giving them so much of your time :)
yep that's what he's saying.
@SkullyX99 can you tell me how she treated you over what time? i maybe got the same problem
I wasn’t aware until i was a victim of it. One of my best friends was a narcissist which I wasn’t aware but in one point in our daily conversations I realised that she was a jealousy and competitive person which kind of shocked me but I was devastated to know that she was the cause for everything what I was going through and for my suffering. She was not just jealousy and competitive ,she had all negative behaviours like manipulating and lying habits to win over others. She’s a most dangerous person who is a narcissist I have come across, she was a eye opener for me but sadly after many damages.
Your information is 💯 accurate and have subscribed your channel as well Thx.
THEY ARE TRULY VER DANGEROUS PEOPLE AND IN MY CASE A SIBLING AND WILL TAKE SIDES WITH OTHERS AGAINST THEIR OWN BLOOD RELATIVES
AND BELIEVE IT OR NOT TO THIS DAY SHE HAS NOT CHANGED A BIT BUT NOW THAT I UNDERSTAND WHAT NPD IS ALL ABOUT I NOW KNOW THAT I WAS NEVER THE PROBLEM IT WAS JEALOUSY AND ENVY ALL ALONG ON HER PART SHE WAS EVEN JESLOUS OF HER OWN DAUGTHER I PEOPLE WITH NPD WILL HAVE YOU THINKING THAT ITS YOU BUT THEYRE THE PROBLEM TO THE CORE
Hello, pretty solid video. Where you went wrong is you covered women being Grandiose (Overt). The research would show that most women are Vulnerable (Covert). This is why there's a false statistic that 75% of Narcissists are Men. It's incorrect because most men abused by a Narc aren't going to tell anyone and most therapists either aren't well trained in Covert Narcissism or she manipulates her way through therapy, undetected and undiagnosed. I would also add that she could be a hybrid of both and also have comorbid traits of other Cluster B things like Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD is significant in women vs men), and several others.
Have a great day.
Interesting that you don’t consider the BPD statistics to also be gendered and flawed. Many women are falsely disagnosed with BPD due to sexist beliefs.
Narcissist co-workers are an absolute drain on your work day. I worked with one who always complained that everyone was 'out to get her' and her ex-husband was 'still in love with her'. She was a low-quality worker that was chronically late for work and returned late from lunch daily. That's why HR had discussions with her about her performance. And her ex-husband was texting, emailing and calling her because she was refusing to finalize there divorce and dodging his attorney. But the best was her birthday. She came to work in what looked like a prom dress, with a Birthday sash and a crown. She beamed all day, didn't really work, and was beyond elated and taking selfies when the office presented her with a her Birthday cake. (Everyone got a birthday cake for their Birthday-duh) It was so weird.
Oh it is possible. Very possible. I was married to a covert narcissist for 34 years. It’s just not possible to have a HEALTHY relationship with one. It is also impossible to hang on to your self respect and your own mental health in the long term.
Female narcissists can be very extremely dangerous as well. Is there a doctor in the house?
The doctor could well be a narcissist
Excellent analysis. A well balanced article with very kind language and reasonable directions
Thank you so much for your feedback
Perfectly said. I felt the same way but you worded it for us both.
How about the harm that female -- and male -- narcissists do to their children?
We have a video about being raised by a narcissist
CORRECT. They are TERRORISTS and should be treated that way...Guantanamo, at the very least !!!
It's really harmful...I was raised by narc parent and narc aunt...My childhood was very very traumatic...Their parent seemed to be a narc too...
This is when they really got you. Kids are nothing but pawns to use to lure you back or hurt you if there is no going back.
I dont know if it is just me or if im unlucky enougth that all woman I met and trusted had exactly this behavior?
Maybe that's the ppl you find attractive? Not saying it's true I'm just saying maybe
Narcissists have a knack for gaining trust
People who don't end up in relationships with narcissists are usually better at filtering them out before things get serious. Learn how to spot red flags.
@@Bb.v.o.x no. It's preatty much anyone
@@jesswitmer6389 ok I migth try
Yep i remember a boss like this she was tiring i feel sorry for her current colleagues.
This is so heartbreaking 😢 Stay strong!
Thanks so much for breaking this down in a concise and compassionate way. I appreciate what you do. I’m struggling with my wife, who I love very much, and want to keep our family together (4 wonderful daughters). I am patient and supportive.. it’s good to know that we’re not alone and it’s a huge benefit simply coming to an understanding when one is taking some major internal damage on the reg.
Like me, the worst is when you were just a friend, but then worked for them. She couldn't stand to see me happy. Her biggest fear was my total independence, which I achieved. All i got was egging of my car. I never knew of this disruption in people's minds!!
I would not choose to stay in a relationship with a narcissist. It would not come close to my idea of a healthy relationship
My on and off (currently the latter and probably forever now) girlfriend is a complete narcissist. I didnt realise.
But there were so many red flags. I chose to ignore them because now and again when we are together, its literally perfect.
There were other times. Other times when... she literally broke me. Put me down. Hurt me. She has no empathy. She almost intentionally hurts me I believe. I don't think that she's subconsciously hurting me. I believe she does it on purpose.
She made me question my morals. My lifestyle. My looks. My self worth.
She is a monster.
They ALWAYS intentionally hurt or try to hurt you, bro
Sadists they take pleasure in your pain physical and emotionally
PERSONALLY I BELIEVE ONLY PRAYER AND GOD CAN CHANGE THESE PEOPLE THEY TRULY CANNOT HELP THEMSELVES I AM SO BLESSED TO HAVE BEEN RAISED BY A MOTHE THAT DISPLAYED REAL KINDNESS AND GUINE EMPATHY
Super good for you that you didn’t have a narcissist mother! Really happy for you! ❤️
I remind my daughters constantly they are not crazy, it's not them and just hang in there. I was the problem, but since we divorced the problem still exists. The focus has just shifted onto the girls now.
My brother had these traits he actually thought he was important until said people brought him down. he then self destructed
I like that this is focused on women even though its pretty much the same for both sexes. But men that need help are more likely to click on this. Most people think of only men when the topic is discussed. ❤
I think female narcy is worse than male... They make victim themselves better than males.
Well men a hardly going to choose a woman first for advice. You don't ask sharks for advice on how not to get bitten.
I didn't know how much I needed to watch this until I watched this
Thank you
An admirable analysis, of probably 85%, of that which I experienced; from an old girlfriend.
I don't need to explain further surely.
I must have watched "tons of" videos about this subject.
I won't insult your intelligence; by describing their presentations ☺
Furthermore.
Yours is easily the BEST I've seen.
I liked the style of drawing the subject matter at hand; section by section.
Then stopping for reflection; and carrying on with its excellent suggestions.
So
It only needs me to give you thanks; and tell you I've subscribed.
Regards from Kensington and Chelsea; in London.
🇬🇧 🤝 🇺🇸
Having one of these in the family I can confirm all that has been said and the comments do too. Because it's family we have had to try and live with it no matter how hard. However now and again I blow and cannot hold back any longer. The delusion of the narcissist is amazing and months after I have pointed out a trait which was totally denied and been attacked for stating it she admits it??? For now!
I had an ex narc.. WORST experience ever
Wow that’s a video about my mother and both of my exwives. Thanks !
I'm a guy who had a one time date with a very beautiful woman . She wanted me to pick her up at an EXACT TIME
and when I was ten minutes late , she berated me for being late . This was the first strike against her . We went to
see the movie "MEDIUM COOL" , which I thought SUCKED ! this is ths second strike against her as she wanted to see
this movie . Then after the movie , we got into an argument and at one time she says "Oh , I am sooo beautiful !"
This was the third strike against her as that told me that she was madly in love with herself. Her actions let me know
that she was narcisstic and was not able to love someone else . This became my only date with her !
My mother told me that this woman cried one time because "SHE DIDN'T GET HER WAY "!!!
I gotta leave my wife……so hard to do
Just get out of there because it will only get worse once you see the traits it’s time to get out there is no making them better or explaining how horrific their behaviours are they are selfish manipulators & very good at lying and gaslighting as pleasant as anything when they want something spiteful and rage when they don’t get their own way the abuse escalates please get out now and don’t look back just disappear if you can she will start a slander and defamation campaign against you to try sway others the problem is you & the only way to deal with them is leave! I wasted years of my life trying to appease these sorts of lunatics!
Did you do it???
The longer you stay , the more you will pay .
I am an emphat raised by narcissist mother. I ended up marrying a narcissist, who i divorced and kater he died of cardiac arrest. I went to major councelings due to lack of confidence and felt the entire world was against me at that time. Thanks to my Wonderful therapist who i continued my 4 years of therapy, teached me about narcissists and the damages i overcame, finally i started to understand about narcissism and consequences. I realized that i had nothing wrong with me.
But i need to be constantly in alert, and hope who rwad this also stay alert because wvery new friend, male or female tend to be 90% narcissists, and need to focus on reading their next step before they use you....😅
Thanks because of your point of view, which is absolutely true. 💐🌷
I wholeheartedly agree with this presentation. The only thing I want to add is everything said here that female narcissists do, the male narcissists do too. My mother was a narcissist and a single parent and you nailed everything about her. Now I'm living with and dating my best friend with benefits, of 22 years. My mother loved him for me. It wasn't until we had been together 3-4 months when I saw it. The gaslighting, shifting of blame, and creating narratives to give you a false truth. My mother and my man both display every trait you name here.
I would love to see a video detailing what happens when a narcissist dates a narcissist.
I wonder will the male dominate.
You either a women or a gay man
My mother is a narcissist. I have been told that people seek partners that are like their mother in personality. My brothers gf is a spitting image of my mother. I got lucky with my wife. 😊
I have recently left my church to attend another due to a Narc's behaviour. They singled me out for what ever reason, honestly, there is no reason. They then enlisted others to attack me via gossip, character & reputation assissination, which ultimately effected my mariage & my wife & I's business.
I took this all to the Pastor who minimised my accustaions & made me feel like i needed a psychiatrist.
My whole statement stayed on his desk, even after insisting that he showed it to other senior leaders of the church who i knew would take me seriously.
Nothing ever happened, so i left. I pity the next person who falls victim to this woman, as she has now been enabled & enboldened by the whole ordeal.
ps, i DO NOT blame the church!, Just because Jesus forgives those sins we present to him, it does not mean we are perfect, improved or even any better than we were beforehand.
What a hard situation, sorry you had to go through that
Wow I am going through the exact same thing right now.Thank you for validating my experience
Organized religion has to keep his minions under control. In my experience some pastors use people to do their bidding and control everyone that they possibly can
I’m so sorry the church failed yet again. I too have suffered greatly at the hands of the church and the wolves in the pulpit. I could write a book. What I wanted to share with you was related to the latter section of your comment starting at “just because Jesus forgives”, to the end of your comment. If Jesus forgives a person, while it might not be instantaneous but rather an ongoing process called sanctification where He begins to clean you up and root the sin out of your life. If someone asks Jesus for forgiveness and that process of sanctification does not soon follow, then maybe the person was not serious or only half serious about being forgiven to begin with. God knows when someone is seeking Him wholeheartedly and answers that call and creates in that person a clean heart and gives that person His Spirit. And unless a person is born of that Spirit, they will never enter the kingdom of God.(John3:5)
And unless a person who has hurt you comes and asks for your forgiveness, please don’t believe that the Biblical thing to do is to forgive them. The wolves in the church today twist Scripture to control and abuse the congregation. The church is being dismantled ever increasingly by those the Book of Jude warned us about, “those who crept in unawares. The present themselves as sheep but are actually ravenous wolves. The true sheep in the church today are being led to the slaughter. The Whole Truth cannot be found in most churches today because the infiltration is almost entirely complete and the end times “falling away” has long been underway.
If there’s anything in this world that is worth accomplishing before we die, I would say it’s this One thing and that is finding Jesus, knowing beyond a shadow of a doubt that you’ve found Him and and laying hold of Him. I just realized your comment is several months old so I don’t know if you will ever see this but I’m gonna pray that you do and that you don’t hold Jesus responsible for the hateful attacks that you suffered in His house because that’s exactly what it was designed to do.
Jesus forgives us when we repent of our sins.
Unbiased explanation with added solutions. Appreciated.
Unbiased? Hardly
Hint: she engages in the dark arts, loves death, uses coke, is an alcoholic, has an eating disorder, abusive in all forms, ruins anything healthy, performs spells to break up good people, binds you by having children with her, and thrives on a materialistic, superficial lifestyle by using her body to seduce you but is never satisfied and will drain you body, soul & mind. Eat the apple and you eventually become her: the walking dead. She is easily recognizable by her devil/crazy eyes and taunts the innocent about what she’s done as her main purpose in life is to be the devils enforcer and she’s loyal to her mission. She lies, cheats & steals and will kill you softly and your former self will become a distant memory and has absolutely zero remorse for what she’s done. She is the selfish narc.
I married a narcissist and my sister is one of the best narcissist I ever seen in my life!!! I can see it in other people but bc she’s my sister it’s so hard to let her go!
I got away from a ex friend like this whew thank Jesus
As a woman myself im glad someone made this video because people absolutely think there arent female narcs..
I want to look good in the eyes of others because i feel safe that way. I hate others hating me, picking on me, comment on me. I’m so scared of fights too. If everyone feels i’m good, then i’ll be in my safe zone where i can live peacefully. I never belittle anyone, i never brag about my accomplishments instead i’ll understate them because I don’t want attention much.
I have gotten Reid my few female friends the more I was educated on this personal disorder
Thanks for the video. I'm appalled by the way my ex Patricia meets EVERY SINGLE TRAIT pointed out in this video. Because of her emotional blackmailing, I've been stuck in a bullshit with that piece of shit from late 2010 up to late 2013. I broke up with her no less than five times, and whenever she saw my life was doing good enough without having her punk ass around, she tried her best (or worst, depending on the point of view) to keep me from moving on. To that end, she resorted to vilifying and victim playing tactics, always calling me a "disloyal" man, and saying I "never loved" her", and later stressing "how much" she was "suffering" because I was basically living my life. She used those tactics intermitently and non-stop, but always coming up with something new, whenever she noticed I realized her shit was getting old. For those of y'all who once had a stalker, and those who had been manipulated by a skilled manipulator, y'all do know that shit goes deeper than a mere YT comment can go.
Once she had what she wanted - i.e., having me come back with her as a boyfriend -, she'd follow up with Pavlovian ups-and-downs manipulation tactics, bringing arguments and psychodrama to the relationship whenever things were supposed to be calm (that is, most of the time), and turning down the heat and chilling whenever she saw I was about to get out of that relationship.
I'm happy I managed to boot her ass far away from my life. Nowadays, she calls herself a "psychologist". I feel sorry for her patients, and I genuinely fear for their welfare.
Glad you were able to let go of that toxic relationship. Always choose you, can't be wrong if you do. Thank you for watching!
Forgive yourself for taking her back so many times, it's a lesson you had to learn. She made you better, now you will never be THAT guy again❤ ✊️
@@HolisticManifesting
I DEEPLY appreciate your comment. Thanks a bunch! Much love! ❤
I was married to a male malignant narcissist, it's sheer hell to deal with these people! It took 3 divorce attempts and a permanent restraining order (which he violated) to get him out of my life. Glad you're out of the situation!
@@susanhewitt6359
I cheer for you. You deserve better. The world would be better off without people your former husband and my ex-hoe.
This is the first video I've seen that has a positive approach, when it comes to this subject. Most of them like to make a villain out of the narcissist and how to recognize their traits so you can get away from them, demonize them and exclude them from your circle of friends. This has a solution based compassionate approach. I like that.
Thank you, glad you found it helpful
Yeah most make a caricature out of the narcissist online and have people seeing narcissists everywhere they look. A "deep narcissist" is a better analysis because it delineates from normal narcissistic traits all people have and the true toxic narcissist that is a vicious cold blooded manipulator that has a high degree of psychopathy to go along with it.
The misuse of this term has almost robbed it of all meaning and when I hear it I always question whether there is any validity to the claim. My ex was a true deep narcissist who had that psychopathy that made her dangerous and highly toxic so I know the difference and have the scars to prove it. She is not typical though and an extreme by any standard. She ticks all the boxes and leaves no room for doubt.
You HAVE to get away, and yes, they ARE the villain. Had birth giver torture me for 27 years, nearly killed me, crippled me.They ARE evil,
@@annebonnyssister absolutely, especially if they are extremely high on psychopathy to go along with it. Birth giver is an interesting term and I understand the reluctance to use the other term. Mine is also a severe deep narcissist and I haven't spoken to her in two years either. I have never felt better. It sounds like you and I have had some similar history in that regard. Understanding this subject helps you find healthy relationships and helps you understand why you attract others with those traits too. I am a magnet for them unfortunately due to my personality type.
@@theprinceofcrows8691 of course. Bcz mothers do not act this way.
they enjoy pissing you off and then they escalate the situation eventually the cops are called and they lie that they have been abused or assaulted
Watch out for the overly kind people pleasers. They appear as codeps but are dangerous. Codep or narc, not much difference. NB: There's another way to state your purpose. They seek to please those who mistreat them and do not people please the ones who treat them well.
Facts
My sister who’s 8yrs younger than I, the youngest of us 4girls & was always the CENTER-of-attention as we were growing up. When I was about to turn 17, my mother had remarried to man closer to my age than her own; my sister then was only 8yrs old so the new step-dad ‘adopted’ her as his own. My mother abandoned me, LEFT ME @the curb, me running after the car as they drove away for Cali(from Oregon)….well, the youngest sister became step dads little ‘idol’. He spoiled her something ROTTEN. Step dad had become violent w/my mom…but SOMEHOW this youngest sister ALWAYS came away scratch free, while sister#2 would attempt to protect mom thus getting put in hospital herself, while sister #3 ran & hid(left home @only15). This youngest sister had learned how to control, manipulate, and even seduce her own step dad;to avoid his wrath yet gain everything she’d always wanted. My mom and youngest sister moved back to Oregon 7yrs after moms life @risk from the violent step dad. Mom was a chronic alcoholic. Youngest sister started smoking cigs(paid for by step dad(@12, drugs shortly followed. She was an ADDICT of many things until she hit bottom, ten years ago. She’s ‘clean’, well clean from drug & alcohol addiction that is; but quickly traded that addiction for SELF worship. She was taught by 12-step program that SHE MUST choose a higher power, it could be anything, so she chose self. She has become, BY FAR THE WORSE kind of narcissist th3 world has seen….well, BUT SEE SHE WAS ALWAYS a narc. She’s even admitted to me that she seduced her step dad. When I attempted to tell her “but no, you were the victim, you were a child,you were neglected and taken advantage of”…In middle of her drug rehab she’d said, “Oh no, I KNEW exactly what I was doing, and I like it, and I didn’t care if my actions hurt my mom(by seducing her husband)”! This 50yr old sister today is putting me thru the WRINGER w/her gaslighting, manipulation, control, me me me, wah, wah, wah…bullshit. She’s hurt me so badly by LITERALLY rejecting ANYTHING that I say, express, desire or even, YES SHE DENIES MY NEEDS. real needs, not wants, but actual NEEDS. I’m chronically ill, horribly, pain fatigue weakness, major depressive disorder..@ all’s she does is shame me for it. I now currently despise her…I cannot feel love for her any more, as she’s been so oppressive to me….
Please get far away from her!! So what if she is your blood. It's called narcissistic sibling abuse
There are videos on it. Their behavior will literally kill you if you don't get away and cut them off for good. You will start to feel free
Sometimes they discard you in your biggest moment of need before you go completely no contact.
It's meant to destroy you, but you actually feel better
Once you go no contact, your health will start to improve, and you will start seeing your life as if you are a totally different person discovering who you are without all that toxicity that has been with you since a child.
Please just get away from her. Sending prayers your way✨✨✨
Why do you even allow her in your life? Loneliness is no excuse if that’s it. Better alone than friend OR family like that.
I cut people out of my life who are like that and let God sort it out. People like that don’t know how to love anyone (because they don’t really even love theirselves) and there is just nothing you can really do about it. You will cut your own life short if you let them stay in your world. “Hope deferred makes a heart sick.” Proverbs 13:12. Your hope she changes after 50 years will only kill you.
@@missylearned9821 Excellent Proverb and so fitting! 👍
Be careful… she’ll put you in a nursing home, befriend the whole staff to keep you there and take all your assets! She’ll have that nursing home believing she’s a saint and dear sister to you! I’ve seen it before.
@@ReasonablySpeaking9808 wow!! That is happening in my family right now. All of it!! Except I'm not the one she put in a nursing home and she took all of their money before placing them in a nursing home. The staff loves her and thinks she's such a caring person 😟
Had a friend very insecure use to ask me what I was wearing to every event we attended together then down played her outfit ask we to do the same however was very much dress to the tee at the event ! And was very surprised I decided to change my outfit and was just as dress as she was ! Once she ask me to bring my clothes to her house and get dress !
Double mint twins...this disorder is something else. I love how they become the best version of you and everyone believes them. Lies are so praised these days.
I'm attracting these people, always have.
It’s because you’re a good person
Good/weak/maybe low self esteem/ . The longer you stay , the more you will pay.
My comment is you made me feel more trapped than I used to fell before having heard your narcissistic traits descriptions! 😮😢
Want to see a female narcissist look in the comments at the amount of women claiming how they where the victims of multiple male narcs.
Definitely some truth in what you said.
I was all behind your video until you said at the very end,”it’s not impossible to have a relationship with a narcissist”. You obviously have never been on the receiving end of their abuse in an intimate relationship. It’s pure hell on earth. Torture the Geneva Convention would deem to severe and inhumane.
What is love without commitment, communication, loyalty, respect, integrity, truth, gratitude ? Simply human relationships. People are delusional about love, as they are delusional about themselves. Unrealistic expectations from humanity. People treat other people as disposable objects. People don't care about truth, all they crave for is attention, validation, praises and power over others. Cultivate your inner garden instead, and water it with peace. By doing that, you'll realize that you want to watch less and less TV or internet. That's free advice. Peace be with you.
I get sick of people by who talk about other people all the time instead of themself. Although people who talk about themselves constantly are tiresone too. Where is the happy medium? I think I just figured it out. In one to one contact each should show an interest in the other.
I could write a book about how horrible it is to be in a relationship with a female narcissist. To anyone reading this DO NOT IGNORE RED FLAGS! And be on alert for them because people put on a great image then show you their true side later.
As far as I can see, these traits and tactics are identical with those of men. I was with a narcissist for a decade and this all describes him perfectly. So I don't think that the gender actually matters.
My mother is a grandiose narcissist and they don't change and get worse with age and she always talked about herself alot and it let to me cutting her off because she thinks it's all about her and always seeks attention and is a drama queen. I cut her off and walked away
Mine as well. I’ve been “no contact” with my narcissistic mother since 2020.
dude no shit you where by faar one of the best ppl on the topic ... its not a witchhunt at all here , if i may say so : well done !
This is so so so accurate. No matter what she appears like/says--you will feel dissonance between her actions and intentions, and often times worse about yourself after interacting. You will be confused, question yourself and your notion of right-wrong-normal treatment, and often lonely: she cannot be vulnerable, give you authentic love, presence and attention because she is lives from a cognitive distortion of reality-victimhood complex which entitles her to be the center of the world and demand all relationships, people in her life to serve her needs--validation, praise, to mirror her perfection, which is what she needs to feel safe. Many women have strong narcissistic traits (its cultural I believe, advantageous and socially reinforced) but other women who are full on personality disordered--these are severely abused beginning in early childhood, usually by their own mothers, before they could build enough strength to heal and go beyond their families--so instead of learning healthy skills to grow and survive, they learn to hide, manipulate, fantasize to survive and connect to others, and then all their relationships follow this abuse dynamic becuase they dont really have a sense of self so they think everyone is a victim-bully-savior and live in constant power struggles.
I was adopted by a female last assist was absolutely living hell she befriended every single person I ever knew along with her husband, my late father he spent much of their money, trying to cover up all of the things I did to me as a child I went no contact three years ago best movie ever made in my life. There is no making a relationship with people that I have no remorse or no feelings.
You cant!!!..... have a healthy relationship w a narc!!!
Learning about narcissists now at the age pf 28 just to come to realisation i have always attracted narcissists in my life. No wonder i do not have any friends now.
It's better to have no friends than friends who secretly plot to destroy you out of jealousy because you are better than them in some way. You are who you are, and you can't help how people view you. Their the ones with the problem, not you. People who accept themselves the way they are aren't so easy to manipulate.
If there was ever any one thing in life a guy should RUN from it would be this monster. Run for your lives men, RRUUNNN
They run right into their hole and pay for it.
@@Erica-cf1xb lmao yes they do and only the lucky escape
The fastest way to piss off a narcissist, is at some point they will be critical about things in your own personality. At that point just say to them: "Believe me....the last thing in the world I worry about is adjusting my personality to make you happy." If you do this with other's around, one or two might even have to stifle their laughter. Works everytime. They will be embarassed and enraged if they are narcissist, and if they are also psychopathic ( another Dark Triad" disorder), you have an enemy for life. In the workplace they will try to get you fired. Eventually HR will see they are just an angry person and toxic to keep around. And they will get fired. A person who is not a narcissist will not be angry at all, and may even go, "Touche." Suddenly ealizing that their criticism was petty and invalid, and that you just reminded them of that.
It goes deeper than that