Exploring the growing "MEN NEED S*X" discourse
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- Опубликовано: 10 июн 2024
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TIMESTAMPS
0:00 Modernity's intimacy problem
- PART ONE -
6:21 We don't live in a "patriarchy"
12:35 We don't take s_x seriously
18:33 S_xual Liberation ≠ S_xual Education | Storytime about my s_xuality
- PART TWO -
28:58 The story behind "men need s_x"
30:21 Debunking The Happy Wife School's "Why Men NEED S_x"
45:13 The truth about women's pleasure that the Red Pill can't handle
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FURTHER SOURCES
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Развлечения
Get 40% off the Beducated yearly pass with my Coupon Code: kidology beducate.me/bg2350-kidology . This is a truly amazing resource for pleasure-based s_x education that I highly recommend to anybody and everybody.
If you like my work and want to make a one-off donation, I would be so grateful if you PayPal me at powell.zandi@gmail.com. Thank you so much for this support to the channel.
Being so open with your experiences around taking this course and with masturbation was really beautiful. Thank you for that. ❤🎉
blackfriday23
i ended up at "lick my a**" , a 6-voiced canon from wolfgang amadeus mozart lol ... the internet
It's all about fishing when it comes to women. It's his lack of understanding technique. In the PDF library are two books. Knew knowledge of the gift of Circumcision and loving sex. PDF free and very useful, as women get where they need to go, no lip service required... Your welcome,my privilege
ensuring male fulfillment is one of the most overlooked duties of society, and it will not end well
Telling men that sex is their main source of connection, and measuring women's worth by their ability to satisfy this, is emotionally manipulative and simply cruel. Sex is the byproduct of healthy relationships not the reason.
This right here! Well stated!!!
It is our main source of connection in relationships, whether you like it or not, isn't our concern. Sx is a major part of the relationship, and not a "byproduct". None of us would be in a relationship/marriage if we don't get sx.
@@Altair-El-Haddad And you enter a relationship how in the first place? Sex? Or mutual love, respect, principles, life direction and the commitment to doing this together? Sex is huge, yes. But it’s not the MAIN source for men or women. When there is no sex there is ALWAYS an underlying reason. There can be sex and no connection but if you have a deep fulfilling connection with someone you’ll naturally want them. (With the exception of sexual trauma)
As a man, I can say that being denied sex makes me feel unloved. This is not because I have been told, it is because I have my own feelings and know it. Please stop dehumanizing men and start listening to them.
So well said 👏
Maybe I'm the weirdo here but there's one simple thing I don't seem to understand, and I say this as a man. Why on earth would want to have sex let alone do ANYTHING with someone who evidently doesn't want to do it with you...? I mean seriously. If you initiated having sex with your wife and she said she wasn't in the mood because she's super tired or something. Would you really want to have sex with her after that? KNOWING that she doesn't want to? What if she blatantly said "fine we can but I don't want to do anything" so she just lays there and lets you go at it.
It's genuinely confusing for me. Because at that point its clear you view sex with your partner as not a mutual act of enjoyment and fullment but instead as essentially a masturbatory tool with their body. It shows to me that there's a fundamental false view of sex you'd need to have to even feel that way in first place.
And as another commenter already said, sex is the byproduct of a healthy relationship not the reason. If a woman is denying her partner sex in the first place then either the sex isn't pleasurable for her and her partner should make an effort to fix that or there's other problems in the relationship entirely unrelated to sex.
Exactly, (to basically restate what you’ve already said) the person and their feelings don’t matter when they’re an object to you that you think *you own* and thus is a valid means to *your* end. Sorry for being crude but I imagine the logic is: “It’s will be quick just stay still, let’s get it over and done with” and then the other partner enters that dissociative out of body state just to survive the experience as the other uses them.
But you’re right, it’a gross and abusive.
@@emmm_4465 that's very much what rape culture is and what the vast majority of men think is normal - just read the comments of the "good, nice men" in Karyn's video. this is the reason why we women say that every single men is a potential rapist, because we all know that the vast vast majority of men - like 95% - do exactly what you both described above with their partners. it is really really rare to find a men who was never guilty of it and when confronted with it most of them will pretend to not understand it, to not be aware and will try to turn things around and portray themselves as the victims to whom something absolutely crucial such as water and ar was being denied, while also trying to convince everyone that in reality, deep down the woman actually wanted/liked it.
It’s wild to me. So sad women have been dealing with this through history
It’s really good that it’s confusing to you because it shows that you’re a good human being that respects other human beings. Unfortunately there are men out there that actually get sexual pleasure and excitement from forcing sex on unwilling women. It is genuinely psychopathic behaviour and shows a lack of empathy.
Every single man who thinks it’s ok to “have sex with” his unwilling wife needs to imagine how he would feel if his wife brought out a strap on one night and said “I know you don’t like it but I don’t care. Can you just lay there and take it until I’m done?” Unless they’re in the small subset of men that are into pegging, I’m sure they wouldn’t be pleased with such a request. More men need to remember that their wives are actual human beings with feelings and emotions, and that they need to treat their wives how they themselves would want to be treated.
If I turn down my wife or I don’t finish during our intercourse she gets sad because she feels as if I’m not attracted to her. I understand it and it doesn’t make her weird.
I have a pretty high libido as a woman but the very nature of how people speak about sex as a service rather than a gift to be shared turns me off all the way and often these days I'm so disinterested in actually pursuing a sexual relationship.
Just find a like-minded sex enjoyer
omg same
Same.
In other words you cant find a chad we feel you sister 😭
Yes, how women and sex are spoken about on social media just makes sex seem ugly and dehumanizing.
For a "happy wife" she looks pretty miserable
That’s because she was trying to compete with her husband instead of actually be the support. They cannot be two heads of a family. There cannot be two captains of the ship.
She is more happy now than she was beforehand, I would chalk her unhappy look to the previous indoctrination of feminism.
👀
Right?
She looks like a lot of boss girls.
How do you judge the inner state by a look? I think you see that you want to see. She is stupid but does not look unhappy.
“Your husband is not a woman.”
And likewise, your wife is not a man.
You are two different human beings who are wired differently in regards to sexual drive, and that’s before you even get into the realm of personal preferences. Why is it the responsibility of women to “learn” against their innate desire? Why can we not share this responsibility? If women must learn to love sex, why is it not the responsibility of men to love everything their wife desires?
I’m all in favor of sex positivity and healthy sex lives, but this isn’t sex positivity, it’s marital rape waiting to happen.
Thank. You.
Share responsibility? It’s sex. if you feel it’s a responsibility then you shouldn’t be in a relationship. Why even relate if it’s a “task”
Too many femcels in these comments
_"why is it not the responsibility of men to love everything their wife desires?"_
News flash: it is (up to a reasonable extent ofc).
Also if it's against your innate desire to engage in sexual intimacy with your partner...something is seriously wrong and/or abnormal lol.
I recommend: _communication!_
If you're either,
*1.* not willing to make sacrifices for your partner,
*2.* you're not sexually attracted to your partner,
*3.* engaging in sexual intimacy with your partner disgusts you,
-let them know! This puts you on an even playfield and they can now make an informed decision on whether they're actually interested in dating someone who is bringing either of the above mentioned poisonous plants to the relationship.
Honesty always wins the day 🌟
@@TheMightyWalk
She’s talking about how lots of men just want to get home from work, flop on the couch, only grunt responses to her until it’s bedtime and then wanting to fuck.
Putting zero into setting the mood and making her feel loved and not like some home to be filled.
@@TheMightyWalk
Sex isn’t a responsibility, but communication, honesty, and problem resolution are. Sex is one additional Avenue that partners must navigate together. It’s not as simple as “if you love each other you’ll be sexually satisfied with each other”. You can have specific desires and wants that your partner doesn’t share. How do you voice your unshared desires?
That’s your responsibility.
Honestly, you’re giving me the impression you’ve never had sex with anyone, or at least not anyone you’ve genuinely reciprocated feelings for.
It’s disgusting hearing people say “you just need to lie” “it’s easy, don’t worry about” towards unwanted penetration. As someone who’s had chronic issues with pain during penetration, their 5 minutes of pleasure would be stinging, tearing sensation and itching for the next 24 hours.
I used to have a normal healthy interest in it, but being repeatedly coerced by partners who barely pretended to care. Led me developing an aversion to it and killed my drive.
❤❤ I hope you recover, not for the sake of others, but for your own sake.
I'm sorry you've had that experience, it's awful.
Sometimes I try explain to my guy friends, as unwanted advances bringing a feeling of pure disgust, like an actual tangible wave of nausea, crawling skin and irritation - pick a food you absolutely despise, and someone is pressing you to eat it, and with relish! I cooked it specially for you, if you don't eat it you don't love me!
Maybe you usually like the food, but you're full, or feel ill, what use is trying to force it down? It only breeds resentment, and eventually you'll grow to hate the food.
Clumsy analogy but it's been useful to help the men in my life understand the dilemma.
That’s entirely your fault if you weren’t into the guy you shouldn’t have been with him .
i've been dealing with the same issues and i feel you! sending internet hugs 🫂
Same. My drive isn't entirely gone, though. My interest in others is. 😔
As a bi dude who has the privilege to just go on Grindr to get casual sex, I was not, for the longest time, able to understand why women seemingly (to me) did not like sex as much as men. I looked at my experiences with men, saw a quick and easy exchange of satisfaction, and saw how with women, even a kiss seemed like an intensive song and dance requiring a weird mixture of social queues and context clues that are incredibly difficult for me to understand as a neurodivergent (clinically diagnosed by a doctor) person. In addition to that, due to very extensive childhood trauma related to my Mother, I had a very big problem with having a genuine fear of vaginas (I say vagina because I never felt this afraid around trans women, even though my "straight" half gets attracted by trans women the same way with cis women). However, after an extensive stint at a therapeutic clinic, I began learning about women's issues and came to my own theories about why some men feel like women "don't want sex" (will be generalizing around straight people for the sake of simplicity):
Men and women both equally want sexual gratification. Both men and women enjoy the physical act of sexual gratification. However, there are some reasons why women feel more reluctant to engage in sex in such a careless fashion as men.
- Pregnancy risk
- power imbalance (in most cases the guy is going to be more physically powerful than the woman, and as a guy who does not sleep with guys who I could not beat in a fist fight, I get the hesitation)
- relevant risk of no orgasm (Hell I've only gotten one woman to orgasm in my entire life and I'm seen as cool by my two straight male friends for even that, which paints a dark picture for the female sexual experience)
- the tendency for some men to dislike condoms (never really understood this one but I'm going to trust women's experiences here)
- social stigma of women who speak about sex the same way that men do (shaming)
- current pop culture trend of seeing sex as a method for barter (lots of music is perpetuating the stereotype that women should only have sex with a guy if he has money or status, this stereotype both affirms incels and shames straight women who enjoy sex just because they have a partner who is skilled)
- trauma issue (the fact that SA is still not even closely to being as talked about as it should be, and due to women statistically more likely to be SAd than men, they are more likely to associate the intimate act with that traumatic experience (And trust me, I empathize with that with all my heart, I do so more than one may think))
If anything I said is whack and untrue, please excuse my ignorance and explain why I am wrong in the comments. I am trying to learn every day.
Wow! Seems like you learned a lot at the therapeutic clinc. The reasons you laid out are spot on!! Only thing I'd add is to the "risk of no orgasm", is not only the risk of no pleasure but of actual pain during sex. Imagine taking the risk to sleep with a man and not only does it not feel good, it hurts. ADDITIONALLY, it's really angering when you don't feel good WHILE you know the man is having an excellent experience at the exact same time. That can build emotional resentment, jealousy, and repulsion. Makes it even harder for men to earn the sex because the imbalance has an even greater gap.
Personally, I gave up on having sex with men for this reason and others. I live as a lesbian and really enjoy having sex with women.
As a woman, totally agree👏
@@talyahr3302 Damn I didn't even consider the pain aspect, but I can assume that if a guy does not care enough to engage in foreplay, and the woman is not ready, it would surely hurt quite a bit (extrapolating from one time when I was 19 and did not know butt stuff needed lube, luckily I learned fast and the bottom was not TOO angry). While part of me wishes (in the case that you are bi/pan but go the "theoretically bi, practically gay" route that I myself went for multiple years before therapy, if I misunderstood your comment please genuinely excuse me I have no intention to be the female-attracted guy trying to tell a homosexual woman about the dong, that would be incredibly disgusting of me) that the men who went in your life treated you better in that regard, I genuinely understand going chicks only. To keep it as SFW as I can, there are some things a guy simply does better to a guy, which women would need a long life of experience to learn, as I am very sure that there are some things that women can do for other women that a guy would have to train at least a decade to master, if at all.
Youre just a gay dude then
There’s also this: women have most of their sex nerves OUTSIDE, Not INSIDE, such as where a MAN would go. But do you know who would stay outside? Women? Women are natural lesbians. Men want to deny it for obvious for obvious reasons, but there’s also there a study that shows that when shown images of women and men, women’s mri light up for attraction far more for women than it did for men. Far more so they one would know how something behaved the vast majority of the time is it’s NATURE.
I’m a woman who has consistently been the one with the higher libido in a relationship, yet there is no “women need sex” rhetoric going around. I am expected (and rightfully so), to respect my partner’s boundaries and not push them for sex. If I cheat because my partner isn’t meeting my “sexual needs”, then I’m a bunch of bad words that I won’t repeat.
I find the asymmetry in the way high libido women and high libido men are treated frustrating. If I can avert my gaze to avoid ogling other womens’ breasts then so can these damn men!
I am a conservative Christian and can assure that in my circles men are also obligated to satisfy the sexual needs of their wives. This goes both ways.
Yea there isn’t enough “women need sex” because there aren’t enough people like you in mass to come together and bring it up. An analogy would be like a minority in Japan making a failing to make a movement about how they are treated badly in society but since Japan is 99% homogeneous it’s not likely to happen.
You could just leave and find a partner with similar libido as yours.
you think high libido men dont ever get shit on for being perverted?
Because it's easy to be a sl*t, but it's damn hard work to be a stud. Easy doesn't get you respect.
One thing that should pop up as an immediate red flag is when you have someone with constricted negative affect selling herself as a happiness coach. She's right-out painful to watch.
Yeah, she looks miserable.
🤣🤣🤣 literally reeling from how depressed and unpassionate she sounds
I didn't want to be too mean, but...😅
Are we sure her channel is not Satire, lol?
It was absolutely wild when she said you can't be closed off and you must enjoy it, not doing it like it's a chore. After spending the preceding minutes talking about how it is a duty that you must do, take one for the team so to speak. So not only is a chore but you better pretend you enjoy it while you're doing that chore. It very much sounds like she doesn't enjoy it herself
31:41 “sex is how your husband feels loved and respected”
What a sad, singular way to define a human.
I think that this is true for a minority of men. But most of them will literally f*ck anything. A movie was premised on a teen f*cking a warm pie and grown men agreed with it. Men think that sex robots are a "flex". In Europe I've seen dudes roll up to hookers in all kinds of sad, degenerate, clearly exploitative conditions. How can you trust someone who will have sex in the most inhumane circumstances in one breath and then claim it's how they feel loved? I don't buy it for all but a tiny fraction of men.
Why is biology sad?
@@harsh3948
I mean, biologically. (Considering the hormones released during an orgasm). Sex makes both men and women feel loved (oxytocin). It's healthy and great for increasing intimacy and "bonding" in a relationship.
But it's not the *only* thing that makes people feel loved/respected. Sexual needs are definitely important, but other types of needs exist as well. Eg Emotional needs (eg the need for feeling understood). So it's definitely sad to reduce people down to their sexuality when people are multifaceted and much more then just their sexuality.
@@Slayy05a "Sexual needs are definitely important, but other types of needs exist as well."
I am not denying their existence, but you lot are denying the hierarchy of priority for these needs in men. Sexual needs will ALWAYS be more important than emotional needs in healthy virile non-asexual men. Thus, they CAN be reduced to their sexuality since a lack of getting of their sexual needs met would be the true bottleneck to their feeling of fulfillment
@@harsh3948 dont brother bro this whole comment section is full of women coping in their own little echo chamber this whole video was 1 hour of cope waste of my time fr, if i had a youtube channel i would dedicate an hour long video to dismantle and disprove every argument made in this video.
i wondered about this since i was a preteen,why women put up with so much pain (painful sex,pregnancy,abusive behavior) just to appease men when they get so little in return. I understand i paid the price of not settling by being alone pretty much most of my life,but succumbing to a mans desires and tolerating so much pain always felt wrong to me morally.
Probably because they aren't told that this can happen (at least not until recently). Most women have to suffer the pain to know it hurts. It's like putting your hand to a flame, but having no one to pull your hand away and telling you why you'd hurt yourself. People unironically "romanticise" romance too much and overstate its value on a personal level.
you know there is also just clear communication. you don't have to be alone. you can have a partner and and simply communicate about how you like or don't like sex. even if you don't like sex at all you can find partners that will be ok with that. if fear has stopped you from being in a relationship thats a real shame...
@@slothhq1929 honestly,i'm capable of doing that now but a lot of girls get into relationships early on when they havent developed their own personalities and don't know how to draw boundaries yet,i'd give up my independance only if i met a decent human being who respected me and my needs,sadly a lot of people sacrifice that because they can't stand being with themselves ever.
I'm sorry you were surrounded by that type of men during your formative years. If you ever want to dip your toe into the dating pool again, don't bother with online dating. Ask a trusted friend if she knows any decent guys. They'll be much more vetted.
Bless you for standing your ground.
This is why I'm still single. Being asexual I'm scared of being used as a sex toy just to please my man. It's not worth it to me. I've had sex in past relationships to please my partner (i've never enjoyed it tho) and it always destroyed the relationship for me. All they wanted after that was just sex. Whatever emotional connection was replaced by their horniness and trying to get me back in bed. It made me feel unloved and like I was just an object at that point.
The way I related to every sentence😭.
oh this is far too relatable
I'm not asexual, but this is also why I'm single. It's frustrating because I do enjoy sexuality and sometimes still come out of hiding to connect. But at least now I can do it when it actually means something to me and not at the constant (sometimes more than once a day) demand of a partner.
As a man with a high sex drive I appreciate you for not entering into a relationship. Not being in a relationship is much better than being in a relationship with someone you aren't genuinely attracted to in order to extract resources from them, which is what most women do.
@peopleofearth6250 With an attitude like that, I'm sure women are lining up to be with you
Somehow in modern day young women are supposed to let their partners choke them and spit on them for fun but wanting an emotionally fulfilling, loving, wholesome relationship is having too high standards. I'm not saying you can't love whilst having consensual kinky activities, but when the idea of being "liberated" and "empowered" trumps actual emotional connection with another human being, I don't see the point
Well young women pick jerks 20 percent of men get 80 percent of women and those men get tired of vanilla stuff.
excellent observation. thanks.
Stop projecting you silly bint.
Exactly
Yes but is an emotional connection in the form stated above really worth it if it will be used to exploit you for domestic labor, emotional labor and more without adequate reciprocation in any form?
You don’t need a partner to have emotional connections to friends family and pets.
Reading many of these male comments talking about how marriage means expected “seex on demand” I can see why more women are opting out rlps.
yea they dont want to give anything. its called narcissism
@@TheMightyWalk giving away your body to someone who doesn’t value it is soul crushing. Women aren’t fulfilled in relationships with men, most are used and abused. No more, we’re done!!
@@TheMightyWalksays the narcissist
It’s not sex on demand it’s about just getting it regularly,
Poor excuses from women who have settled for a guy they’re not into it’s your fault .
@@OliverFlack69 Blah blah blah …. Like I said, that’s why women aren’t settling anymore. Critical mass of males are not worth the stress or energy for mostly mediocre sex.
I'm very happily married, but despite our otherwise happy sex life there was a time for nearly 3 months were we didn't have sex at all. It started around when I was 9 months pregnant and went for several weeks after a very stressful delivery that resulted in a c-section. Leading up to the birth it was due to extreme discomfort (and because I didn't feel sexual in the slightest), and after the birth it was more about recovery from the physical & mental trauma of the entire ordeal. Do you know what my giant Army grunt husband did when I told him I didn't want to have sex for a while, and then when the doctors told us we couldn't have sex for a while? He said two words: "Of course." Because he loves me more than he loves the sexual impulses his hormones give him. He knew that it was a phase that would pass, and that the healthy start in life that our new family would have was more important than anything else in the world. He put no pressure on me to have sex that I didn't want/couldn't have, and I can only imagine that it would've been so much more detrimental to my recovery had he, or anybody else, done so.
With all due respect, your story is irrelevant to the point of the HWS video. She was basically saying that women will start out happily sleeping with her man during the dating stage, but once they've been married for some time, more often than not, they'll weaponize sex, and will start to sleep with their husband MUCH less, and it will typically only get worse over time. Then, when these men cheat as a result, her sexual blindspot never gets discussed.
Honestly... your husband sounds like a good guy, BUT ANY MAN who has a wife who obviously loves him, could handle that type of time frame, especially knowing there's a real reason for it, and knowing roughly when the end date is.
It's not like you didn't find him sexually attractive, and went a much longer time not having sex with him, with no end in sight.
There are women who wind up responding the Sam way as men when their partner doesn't want to have sex with them.
Everyone wants to feel loved and sexually attractive to their partner. It drives people nuts to be in a relationship otherwise, especially with the longer it goes on. It's human nature.
I'm not really pushing this "men need sex" thing, cause I don't like the way it sounds. It sounds creepy. Lol. And I'm not unhappy with my sex life. But I can understand it completely in the proper context, for both sexes.
Alyssa...no offense...but what the flip is this story? XD
No shit your husband said "OF COURSE". Because he's a kind and intelligent person. I would hope that's his response to a REASONABLE EXPLANTATION TO AVOID SEX!
What's your point? Like seriously...what's your point? That a kind man would be patient and love you? Yes, thank you Alyssa.
So please tell me...why are men going 10 YEARS without sex from their wives? Why are there so many dead bed rooms, Alyssa? That lasts for YEARS, Alyssa?
You have to actually address the problem, not give a one off story that makes perfect sense. Men need affection from the women they married. What about that do you not understand? You clearly DO understand it, and that's why you stopped having sex ONLY WHEN IT MADE LOGICAL SENSE TO.
Come on man and actually come to the table and discuss the problems these men are having.
That's a beautiful story, and it gives me hope ❤️ It's sad to see so many men in here missing the point or perhaps just not listening. Bless you and yours!
@@BASSFZz"Men need affection". No it's women who don't get affection from their husbands which makes them less likely to want sex.
Sex isn't affection.
Still watching the video, but as a millennial. Its so bizarre how certain topics that were thought of as "backwards" being brought back to public discourse from the red pill. Time really is cyclical.
Things always come back around, this is true. But its the Red Pill community that is making us go backwards on this topic. The return of these backwards ideas is NOT a natural evolution, but a forced and coerced one as so many red pill males (and women) are just frustrated and unhappy, hoping that by going back, things will be "fixed". The problem is, none of these ideas and mindsets truly benefits 1/2 of the human race: Women. So its up to young women to either go with this, or reject it. And remember, it was rejected once before...and for d@mn good reason.
Before those topics were considered "backwards" they were seen as normal. But I agree.
These people are retarded, but the idea that men value sex a lot and that it's something fundamental that they are looking for in a partner relationship as well as the idea that a surprising amount of women consider the use of denying their partner sex to control/punish them _(in partner relationships)_ as acceptable isn't "backwards" lol. It's just how it is, and it's clearly abusive.
Much like how denying your partner comfort, security etc. is _(obviously assuming they're capable of providing those things in the first place. Also if you're not sexually attracted to your partner, you should straight up tell them that so they can decide for themselves whether they want to be in a sexless partner relationship or not(spoiler, most men will pick _*_not_*_ for obvious reasons, which is why these kinds of women chose to keep it to themselves))._
I hate the red pill with all my heart
@@jonettheonlyand there were always rebels, in every single era of history lol. one man’s normal has always been another man’s torment.
As a straight man, a few things. We don't "need" sex. Not in a stupid "redpilled" way, but in a "we literally don't require it to survive." Anyone who says otherwise is a liar. They know it because they probably are not having it. Also, I would never be attracted to a person like the woman in the intro. She strikes me as emotionally weak and a perpetual victim. Very unsexy and I have enough problems of my own to deal with.
Thank you for saying some of things I wanted to say but couldn't because I couldn't bring myself to😅😂.
Literally SOMEBODY has to be having sex, otherwise humans stop existing….
No seriously. We need at least 1 man & woman to have sex….😂❤ who hurt you ?
Nah your gay
I don’t need sx to survive do you? What happened? Do you stop breathing?
@@Yomel123 _"I don't need validation, respect, love, intimacy, etc. to survive, do you? What happens without them? Do you stop breathing? 🤪"_
I think sex is a valuable part of a healthy relationship… what it is not is the duty of a woman to fulfill for the man. These red pill guys can’t seem to fathom the idea of mutual attraction and sexual fulfillment.
They're just vultures praying on lonely teens. There's a reason why all redpillers are selling something, books, courses, etc...
what does this have to do with red pill?
They’re predators they don’t care about any of that.
@@TheMightyWalk Did you even watch the video? The white woman literally calls herself the redpill for women
It’s hard to keep a good dog on the porch if you don’t pet them once in a while
I was the "happy wife" for 15 years, FORCING myself to please my husband because I knew he has the need for it, while I didn't and it was painful most of the time, but I thought it was my duty as a wife, and if I don't do it other woman will and I'll lose him. I loved him so much. EVEN SO he still cheated and our relationship ended. I wasted 15 years of my life and my youth. Because I wasn't enjoying it at all, but still did it, I am now disgusted by it. I get grossed out even by seeing people kissing. I've been single for almost 2 years and, even though I'm a very romantic person and I would adore to fall in love again, the thought that I'll have to please my partner in that way... I just can't do it.
I wish there was a God who would turn men to biological women for a full year so they can experience it. Only then they would be able to understand. Because now they don't care enough to even try. Yes I know there are exceptions, I hope I will meet one someday, it would make for a great experience to put next to my other great experience of meeting a unicorn.
no wonder he cheated. your happiness is a internal problem not his. do yall think about the amount of mental work and cognitive stress men are under to perform in their jobs and careers for their family or do you only think about yourselves
@@TheMightyWalkSad this is your only takeaway from this post. We get it, you think women are selfish narcissists. But do you seriously not see how your comment is both selfish and narcissistic?
It’s bizarre that you can read this post about a woman experiencing over a decade of pain to please her husband according to the prescribe “wifely duty” rhetoric and your takeaway was she has an internal happiness problem which is why she was cheated on… your conclusion is bizarre at best.
The lack of empathy and self-awareness you’re displaying is actually scary.
Remember, men are not the only ones doing “mental work” or experiencing “cognitive stress.” Men are not the only ones who perform jobs and careers for their families. I’m sure you know at least one woman who has a job that benefits her family.
The OP was likely experiencing all kinds of mental stress in addition to the physical stress of bad s-x… yet it was her husband who broke the marriage vows and cheated. Be rational and place accountability where it is due.
@@TheMightyWalk you’d still have to work if you didn’t have a family.
@@purpleflows5680 they lack empathy. I believe it’s because of testosterone I’m not sure.
@@TheMightyWalkjerk
The kind of man who thinks a woman is obligued to have sex with him tends to be the kind who doesn't regard sexual intimacy as important at all, but only wants it so he can boast to over men about how said woman is his property.
You are oliged to have sex in marriage. That's the deal.
@@izdatsumcp
ding ding ding! We found one. 🙄😒
No. The kind of men (or women) who thinks a relationship with someone who does not want to have sex with them is just someone with a perfectly valid boundary. I would more question the woman (or men) who wants to be in that relationship by faking sexual interest in their significant other - what is there to gain in that?
@@izdatsumcpIf your partner doesn't want to have sex, you really should try to find out the reason and solve the issue. You can't require it though because generally most people rebel when they feel forced to do something they do not want to do.
So it is an issue then? Because I find the 'sex is a chore' narrative from females very disturbing. @@The-Oneness11
While sex matters a lot to both my wife and I, if I was to judge how important it is to each of us based on how we act before and after, it's my wife whose mood improves more. She glows, which is beyond gratifying for me. If I was to draw a pie chart of why our relationship works well, our sex life would be one of the bigger slices.
For varying reasons, it seems most men who hold redill ideology can't fathom pleasuring a woman, so they dismiss it completely in their advice.
That was so beautiful to read. Thank you so much for sharing, and wish you both the greatest!
@@KidologyCO Love your work, and I wish the very best for you.
Good call !
So true, 15:35 is such a great example of the redpill communities outlook on sex. It's so frustrating to watch. Women love s*x too but they cant get that into their head that women like pleasure, when its quality!!
I really don’t think you understand the men. Most likely they would love to pleasure a woman and love to have a woman actually appreciate them. Speaking of the normal men who have certain red pill outlooks. They more so mix with blackpill out looks. I’m not talking about the weird redpill creators.
absolute insanity that this woman obviously had such a miserable and maybe even non-consensual sëx life that she gaslit herself into thinking it's normal and how marriage works. very upsetting and alarming!!!!!!!!!!! i feel for her
She's a redpill woman, and although she's ostensibly speaking to women, her main viewers are men, and she knows that.
She's making "men good, women bad" content so the worst men can confirm their biases and excuse themselves from doing better. She's hurting women in the process.
@@briskettacos She's disgusting. But her grift is very profitable for her. Males eat this stuff up.
@@briskettacos I mean, I'd assume even kidology's main viewers are men because men make up the largest demographic on youtube, especially talking about any of this social/political content. weird correlation to make
of course. woman does something you consider bad it has to be the fault of some man that made her that way, it cannot be her own fault and responsibility.
@@paulogaspar8295Well, the reason we think that is because she’s putting down all women including herself, but you’re right that she might just be doing it to get views and money from red-pill viewers
My wife and I are both women and have two completely different sex drives. My libido is much higher than hers, so in some sense, I can empathize with men who feel like their sex life is lacking sometimes. In fact, the discrepancy between our sex drives used to cause a number of fights in our relationship . Eventually I just had to ask myself, “If the frequency of our sexual encounters never increased, would you still want to be married to this person?” The answer was yes. There is simply too much I value about our relationship to throw it away over sex. I also realize that there was no one else I wanted to have sex with. Since then, there has been much more peace in our relationship and when we do have sex, I know that she’s enjoying it as well and not just appeasing me out of a sense of obligation
Oh, the difference between your experience and mine (as a male) is that it's impossible for me to think there'd be no one I'd want to have sex with, were I single. There's always attractive women around. It's loving my partner that makes sure I don't take an interest in those other women, not their undesirability.
@@FirsToStrike I say this as a man.. It's not your partner's responsibility to make sure you don't cheat lol.. You're a grown ass man who can't even control his impulses to agree the most basic agreement of a relationship...This is why I've stopped taking advice from miserable men on the brink of divorce and started listening to Lesbians.. statistically their relationships are healthier..
@@Maximusket what are you even responding to? Did I say it's my partner's responsibility that I don't cheat? I said it's tied to my love for her that I don't entertain other women, and not to the lack of attractiveness of other women. Go white knight and strawman somewhere else, cuz this is kinda gross to watch.
@@FirsToStrike💯
@FirsToStrike "its my loving partner that makes sure I dont take an interest in other women"
To be fair, it's really easy to take it the way he did.
"I don't cheat because I have such a loving partner".
It’s just more reasons to stay single and a virgin tbh. I’ve heard of how women are treated as soon as sex is involved. I’ve also had a few experiences of my own and … let’s say I don’t want to be dehumanized again. The amount of PRESSURE to do it is insane .
A reason for me to stay single is all the women who don't really like men and only care about money or what the man can do for them. Fortunately for you, you have women that will back you up and support you. Unfortunately for me, I come from a gender full of stupid thirsty braindead people that that thinks with their genitals while shaming me and calling me "gay" when I decide to not want to deal with women anymore. Women stick together, men hurt each other and force other men to suffer with them.
You gotta bring more than sex to a relationship, then. Straight men have been doing the heavy lifting in relationships for decades in America- being the main breadwinner, taking y’all places where straight men don’t GAF about when we could be doing and spending our money on masculine shit, being your emotional tampons…
…sex is like the only substantial thing so many women can and are willing to give a man other than children, and you weaponize it by withholding it and get pissy if the man gets it elsewhere- reverse it and have the man stop catering to you while still wanting sex with you and y’all are quick to leave.
But if you decide to get with someone, make sure to request virginity in your future partner as well, I've seen many women go into relationships/marriages as virgins and run into the same problems and even get painful life long diseases from their partners previous promiscuity.
@@buuny2233 oh I will be very sure to make that a priority! I'm keeping myself clean 🤣😭
@@jared2880this comment shows how incompetent men are when it comes to understanding the emotional and mental components of a relationship. Y’all need so much therapy it’s insane. At this rate, y’all will never have let alone keep a healthy relationship and it’s y’all’s fault.
Why don't these people ever mention that women have sexual desires that we want satisfied too? Why is the focus only on the man's pleasure?
I think they just don't care about women's sexual desires. They're derogatory about them, and believe that women owe them, or that women want the same thing as men. Or else, they just view it as transactional.
Because it's assumed that women have easier access to sex and can have sex with almost any man around them if they made themselves available. On the other hand, a man has to actively pursue a woman and there is still not guarantee he will have sex. Therefore, there is less sympathy or concern for female sexual desire because it is assumed she can find satisfaction much faster and easier than a man. Of course, this assumption primarily applies to very attractive women, but red pillers often forget this.
@@PaulClipMaster have you heard about the orgasm gap? It's very real.
@@user-ov9eu4gx3z Again... it's assumed that women have easier access to sex and can have sex with almost any man around them if they made themselves available. On the other hand, a man has to actively pursue a woman and there is still not guarantee he will have sex. Therefore, there is less sympathy or concern for female sexual desire because it is assumed she can find satisfaction much faster and easier than a man.
@@PaulClipMasterNo it isn't though. Having easier access to sex doesn't mean that the sex is any good, it often isn't. I don't think that your rationale computes.
Sex becomes a chore in a marriage. Why aren’t women honest with other women about this? Most wives aren’t getting orgasms every time they have intercourse, it gets boring to say the least. Wives have a lot on their plate when they’re in a relationship and sex gets added to the list. When you HAVE to do something the novelty wears off.
i think this is the issue the lady was bringing up. this issue should be addressed. lets be honest. its better for the husband and wife if sex was more exciting and if they were both willing participants. both the husband and wife should work to make that a reality. and if they cant then they should open up the marriage. asking someone to simply never have good sex again for the rest of their life, is a big ask.
Yes instead of women saying “I feel fat today” they need to be honest and say it’s a chore .
Nobody is honest to women because it's in everyone's best interest for women to stay "dumb" and go into these marriages blind. Women are a "resource" to men and society: Women up men's game. Married men earn more and are healthier. Even as boys, males require more parental investment, much of which comes from mom. Meanwhile, it's much harder to show the tangible benefits to a woman who is on the fence about marriage. Someone on the lower spectrum of desire probably should think twice...
@@OliverFlack69 I agree but they don’t want to hurt their husbands feelings.
I agree with this. I genuinely think most women in long term relationships are tolerating their husbands need for sex rather than desiring it themselves. I think it’s rare for a woman to have sexual desire for the same man over a long term period.
Many many men do not understand pregnancy and its ramifications on the female body
As well as cycle and gynecological issues that cause weight and ‘appetites’ changes
And it really seems like they don’t care to know
Pills and rubbers exist. Not all sex leads to pregnancy.
and yet those women choose it? unless they were raped I guess
@@D3xterJettster Your point?
The happy wife sounds like she’s about to start crying in every take.
Manz just sat there & said “ i rape my wife it’s her wifely duty if she doesn’t want to be raped I’ll cheat”
How disgusting .. four months into my husband and I marriage I ended up developing chronic bladder problems that I’ve been struggling with for almost 3 years now. This intern, causing our sex life to fluctuate a lot if I’m not doing well it’s not gonna happen if I’m doing good it’s gonna happen. Sometimes I feel bad because it’s something we both enjoy and is important to us, but isn’t the most important thing in the world. I’m so thankful that my husband always reassure me that he loves me no matter what and that he doesn’t want me to do anything that will make me uncomfortable
If its a medical issue, most men understand, were not barbarians.
No they don’t and yes you are
I was agreeing with her comment, are you seriously stupid or something.@@kemery22222
I'm happy you're in a sweet healthy partnership ☺️ thanks for sharing. These comments make my day!
It's not important to you...he's miserable
Intimacy starts outside the bedroom... That USB gesture isn't the beginning of intimacy.
If i need to be forced into sex for over 40 years so I can have a husband, I would rather not. Men want sex, but reality is that most of the time they are not even good at it. Disappointed in 90% of the times I had sex in my life, to the point I genuinely don't crave sex anymore because, MEN, made me hate sex and they have the guts to ask me for it.
Women, don't do this to yourselves, you are worth more than this, you are not objects and you are capable of great stuff. You don't need men if they are like this, find someone that will respect you otherwise don't be with someone that drags you down.
You said it.
"Disappointed in 90% of the times I had sex in my life, to the point I genuinely don't crave sex anymore because, MEN, made me hate sex and they have the guts to ask me for it. "
Sounds like you need therapy and training on how to be a better communicator in bed
@@harsh3948 oh believe me, you can't imagine how many times i tried to talk about it and explain what i like and dislike, they did it one time and proceeded to ignore it the next week resetting their brain to 0, which leads us to the second problem here:
Men (not all but you know) genuinely don't care, not even when they care about us they care to improve and they only want to improve when they seek male validation from their friends or society.
@@Sasha-zone I think it depends on the type of men and what they inherently seek sex for. I for example, gain pleasure from the act of sex, the validation given by my partner who is satisfied by my performance, the personal validation of getting to have sex with someone i find attractive, and the validation of my male friends from getting to have sex with someone they find attractive. My priorities for those would be 1=2>3>>4
Some men are wired in a way where they only seek pleasure from the act of achieving their own orgasm regardless of it being a mutual thing, and the validation of their friends. So I can see why your opinions are shaped that way cuz of your experiences
@@Sasha-zone It's funny, if men care about validation from other men so much, maybe they should validate how much they can genuinely please their partner instead.
Sad that (some) men don't listen when women speak on what they like, but when another man tells it they listen. Just look at the AskMen subreddit - there was a question asking other men about how to please a woman sexually. It had a lot of likes and comments. It's the same advice that women would probably say, but the men were way more receptive to the advice because a man said it.
If she's a happiness expert why does she look like she is giving this "advise" at gunpoint?
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
😂😂😂😂😂
In some instances - I wouldn’t really even equate the sexual liberation movement as freeing. It commercialized it more than anything and that unfortunately left out a number aspects associated with intimacy. It was ultimately for the benefit of man - it doesn’t provide nuances to the experiences of women.
So... Women asked for it, Women took the pills, Women had the casual sex.... but it was for the benefit of a man? Why are women allergic to literally any accountability?
bnefit of some men, not most
Does it really benefit men though?
Why women cannot benefit from the sexual liberation movement ? We can also enjoy sex without being judged or without being in a relationship. We only need to protect ourselves (STDS,pregnancy…)
Why did you remove my dissenting comment, @KidologyCO?
Yes, there is a huge difference between good and bad sex.. it's only ever men who claim that any sex is better than no sex. Most women know that for them "bad sex" can be way worse than no sex at all. In fact looking at surveys, the majority of "bad sex" for men is sex where they had an orgasm but the woman was unenthusiastic. For women bad sex means no pleasure, certainly no orgasm, and often physical pain/discomfort. That's not even getting into sex that is "bad" because of feeling like you're being used, treated like a thing, disrespected, etc.
Esther perel once said, “relationships are a beautiful and complex dance of vulnerability and individuality”. There is so much education that is lacking when it comes to intimacy.
For anyone wondering, Karen Seitz is not Justpearlything's actual mother.
☠️🔥🔥🔥
I got tricked, I admit 😔
Girl, how are you gonna say you don't believe in patriarchy and then quote a text describing how women both suffer under patriarchy but reap benefits if they follow its conventions
Dude here, my girlfriend and I have a wonderful & healthy sex life because we both love sex equally "a lot lol". But I'm beyond willing to set sex aside for a bit if my girlfriend would like to connect a little differently sometimes. It's strange to see a woman suggesting that sex is this massively important thing.
Like, shouldn't sex be fun? For both of you? I don't ever want my girlfriend to see it as a chore, because I genuinely don't see it as something that I "need" or "require". That's at best, a really weird way to look at it. At worst, this is a really destructive way of looking at men.
Agree! Sex should fun, adults playing together.
Yes…..for a bit you will. Give it 6 months. Then you love her.
We incels are right,women are the judges of a man worth in this society,making dating almost impossible for young men.
Here are some reasons why dating is impossible for young men feel free to dispute me:
There are more men than womeb specially below 40
More female asexuals than male asexuals
Women are much more picky,choosy,judgy specially in dating
Women They are much content alone than men, due in part to the little society punishment that single women have,single men suffer humiliation, degradation and displacement specially virgin men
Virgin men are unattractive to most women
Short guys(5'6 and below)are unattractive to almost all women
Men have to do the approach
Women have much lower sex drive than men and are more harder to arouse.
We are right in almost every point yet people like to lie.
Men are in the most risky jobs and also more men die in much more numbers and also die younger wtf,and women tell themaelves they are the ones that are opressed.disgusting gynocentric society.women have it so easy in life
@@emptyshogun6194The. Obviously the solution is to avoid marriage and make the sex workers millionaires. At the end of the day men don't need relationships right?? Get a sex worker and have sex with her. Stay single and the world will be a better place
Thank you for sharing 😊 makes me happy to hear these positive experiences. There's hope for the rest of us
I don't think men need sex they just need to feel wanted, that's how they can stick a sexless marriage for years and then fall apart when she divorces him.
What the hell 😂
No all men are the same.
Everyone who liked this comment was a woman, doesn't like women or a prepubescent boy 🤣🤣🤣 this is absolute sacrilege 🤣
15:58 oh and the completely hyperbolic, unrealistic people on Pearly things would get just as objectionable responses if you asked those people if they agreed that blasphemy was a victimless crime.
29:19 you know how you said you felt ashamed of ‘self love’, might not many twitter users not feel the same, particularly when twitter can be used in disciplinary action at work?
Hey there, I'm a guy and knew you from another video and watched this one in full. Don't count myself to what you expected will be angry responses from men here; you points made complete sense and have to do with respecting and taking partners seriously vs more as a means to an end.
I'll have to educate myself more about womens bodies too honestly, even if I realized this only reluctantly.
Thank you so much for watching and for commenting. I do need to remind myself that it's the negative comments which tend to stick or stand out to me at times, and that's unfair and not a just testament to comments and perspectives like yours. So, thank you; it is very much appreciated.
Thank you for your sensitivity bro
The issue that angers men is the assumption that this comes naturally to women, women are out here leaving trails of destruction in people's lives then acting on the internet like its only men that propagate these issues; This video like many others has big Billie Eilish "girls are just nice" energy...
We have watched you all pat each other on the back for the last decade and things have only gotten worse...
@@ESS284 What is ur solution? Force women to have sex? She just made a video saying that a solution to women not wanting to have sex is understanding what pleasures them and having more communication around sex. Force is just going to be contraproductive, making woman hate u.
@@huitzilopochtlisexy9975 There is no one easy solution, the idea that there is a solution and it's men holding us back because 'girls are nice' is the problem, it's so self-righteous.
There was no solution presented in this video, just hand-waving "man bad, woman good".
As a man I don’t need sex all I need is my fishing rod and a brisk Sunday morning at the lake can I get a yeehaw
And no wife👍
Yeehaw brother live your best life we love to see it. Also, love the guts pfp.
My husband doesn’t have a crazy sex drive, we’re good for once a week and other than that he doesn’t really think about it too much. I feel very fortunate I have a man who isn’t a constant horndog but I feel lots of men are this way too. Seems like more of a stereotype than a norm.
Well that’s not the case. The stereotype obviously doesn’t apply to all men, but there are still those that do feel sexual attraction and participate often…
Yes, I think it's not talked about that much. Because it's not "manly" to have low sex drive
@@emptyshogun6194 I'm sure if I presented him with the proposition more than once a week he would be happy lol. Most days he just likes to focus on his hobbies, work and just hanging out talking. yes, we are very happy, and we just had a baby so that changes the dynamic too.
Once a week is very good. Therapeutically, if straight couples don't have sex for 6 weeks straight then it's time to see a marriage counselor.
@@commonomics It's outside influences that act as factors, so that's part of the reason
"I'm trying to attract as many butch lesbians as possible"
I'm so proud.
48:48 You made me let go of some unconscious grief I have been holding. When I was younger, I used to think there was something wrong with me because I noticed as a woman, I would self-please just as often as men did, but since women never talked about it, I just assumed I was some addict and that I was just weird for desiring pleasure as a young woman, but for you just so casually to mention how every woman does it and it's pretty normal for it to be even with men, just like released this burden I was carrying all these years that I didn't even realize I had.
The cold hard turth is that sex is best understood as a "gift" that two people freely exchange with each other, it become corrupt the second its given in exchange for anything else.
Extacting sex from someone as a matter of duty/need is looser behavior because you're admitting to being sexually repulsive while childishly making it someone elses problem.
that makes no sense women go through a lot of changes in their sex drive,regardless of how much they are attracted to their partners,also women on average have a much lower sex drive so it is actually very possible that if a man does not initiate sex they could go very long times without sex
@@Vindicador01 I'm going to need you to explain what "initiating sex" means to you.
That means theres no reason for marriage and monogamy then as it is at best a trap
@@ethosterros9430 not all of us get off to turning sex into a transaction some of us want an experince of mutual pleasure while having a minimal understanding of tax laws/insurance/ asset management/ and STIs
@@redmaple1982 that's awesome. You are not the norm. Even most of the cases they claim such and it's a lie. Statistics don't lie they are a record of human behavior past and present.
I see things the way you do, but statistically finding someone who does too and wants me and I want her back is winning the lottery.
Am I the only one thinking she's projecting when she talks about women 'denying their husbands sex as punishment '?
Like, obviously the s/o and I aren't doing the deed when one of us has upset the other. Because of course not? Nobody's in a romantic mood when they're in an argument with their partner? It's common sense.
But she's trying to convince people that this perfectly normal reaction to being upset is actually women being some evil witch looking to punish their partner. Wtf ? All I can assume is that she's conducted her relationships like that in the past and is just assuming it's something everyone does.
Maybe, but this is a talking point I’ve heard before in RP & Manosphere spaces so it wouldn’t surprise me if a lot of men think like that.
But usually what they see as “withholding sex” is the woman being turned off by his lack of empathy, lack of help with the house & kids, and being burned out by the second shift after they out from work.
@@rmercedes971
It’s not helping it’s his job as a parent and adult who lives in that house
I am a 22-year-old virgin in Miami. I am saving myself for marriage. I am so glad men can't use me for sex, unlike a lot of my peers, unfortunately. Ladies! Do not let men use & discard you!
22 y/o virgin in Miami, Hard cap. 😂😂
@@Altair-El-Haddadmen if a woman is not a virgin: 😡😡😡 men if a woman is a virgin: 😡😡😡😡😡
@@swansong_ I've simply said its a lie, comprehension skills.
@@Altair-El-Haddad Lol. You took my comment too literally. It is a meme...that means that whatever women do, we will always be frowned upon/looked down on. Who are you to tell someone whether they are a virgin or not wth🤡 It would be so ridiculous if I would say that I don't believe someone is not a virgin...both ways is weird. A lot of social experiments show that people cannot determine whether someone is a virgin or not
@@swansong_ I'm not reading all that and my point still stands.
Being married doesn't solve problems. It seems to make them.
Marriage and families are the foundational building block of society. Marriage isn’t the problem, it’s how we as a modern society have chosen to envision it.
It's funny that your replies are taking this as an anti-marriage stance. It's fairly uncontravertial to say that getting married will not fix a bad relationship. It's alwayd better to break up and move on than give permanence to something that is broken.
@@redmaple1982 so just like…break up cause someone isn’t perfect? That’s all you require to leave somebody?
They aren’t god? 😂❤ “how dare you have problems that I need to help you with” lmaooo
@@Macheako That's not remotely what I said.
Spoken like a virgin
Sex is not the only form of intimacy.
For us men, it's the most preferred
@D3xterJettster You are speaking for all of men? What makes you so special lmao.
@@trippypen8879I do not speak for all men, but as a man I have a much better grasp of the experiences, thoughts, and tribulations that men go through.
@@D3xterJettster Another guy here - I would both disagree, and gently ask you to please not make this sort of generalizing statements. There is such a wide and large array of different expressions of intimacy and all manner of displays of affection that to claim one is "universally preferred" is doing a mighty disservice to just about everyone. So please: kindly speak for yourself, and don't try to put your words in others people's mouths.
Also, curious, when you say you have a much better grasp on the experiences, thoughts, and tribulations of men - have you taken into account for example...oh, I dunno...people with disabilities? As one such person myself, I'm almost certain you haven't as it's a pretty wide and complex topic that most folk don't seem to think is even a thing (see: even as a foundation the sexuality of people with disabilities seen as a taboo topic by societies that like to pretend we are all just a buncha garden gnomes). But I do like being wrong, so if you have spent a great time pondering the matter, then feel free to correct me.
Yes! I don’t know why some people in this comment section are acting like men don’t also like hugs and kisses and non-physical intimacy 😭
I can honestly say the main reasons why I didn’t enjoy having sex with my past partners was because one they couldn’t even make me orgasm and I didn’t respect I didn’t care for them so I ended up breaking it off with them and my current partner has gotten better but he is still learning so there’s that but I say this to say the amount of men trying to justify cheating because they don’t get sex you know how many women aren’t getting pleased and faking their moans all in the the name of love honesty I wish women would start thinking like men that’s the only way to teach them is three actions and not words just start cheating on them the seconds your needs aren’t being met lol
They shouldn't have to be taught
hahahah you know nothing, men need sex because they need to release their sperm to relief from pressure
and pain, like when you have to go to toilet to release yourself
women use sex but men need sex
Some of the comments are making me sick. You’re not entitled to sex. If your long term partner stopped having sex with you ‘out of nowhere’, there is definitely a reason behind it. You can’t expect your partner to feel sexually attractive when she’s also expected to double as a mother, therapist and maid.
What is the difference between "need" and "want"? I think we all understand that we *need* food and air. But I don't think we can - honestly - claim that men "need" food in this sense. You don't die of lack of sex.
But there is huge motivation to for men to reclassify sex as a "need" as that then excuses all sorts of bad behaviour they might engage in to get it: It's okay to steal if you're hungry because you *need* food. So if sex is a "need" then...
I guess we can try to dress it up in all sorts of analysis, but is it much more complicated than that? It's just a rhetorical maneuver to create an entitlement to sex.
The thing is, you also won't die of a lack of food for a week, but it'll be very unpleasant, and when you think or become very aware of hunger it's rarely cuz you're factually starving, but just cuz you haven't had food for a while like you're used to.
I think the reason it feels like a need is because it's legit very unpleasant to have a relationship in which sex is withheld, or be without it (and likewise without intimacy or the feeling of being desirable to the other sex) for a long long time.
It seems to me that in the discourse about it, in calling it entitled, one wishes to obscure the fact men do have on average a higher sex drive (average doesn't mean no woman ever wants sex more than a man, it's just that the average man is more likely to want it more frequently than the average woman, and yes there's plenty researches to confirm this), and so ask them to compromise on it to maintain a relationship. But go to any female forums or subreddit or even just friend group, and you'll see how much of a big deal it is when the man doesn't want to satisfy his woman's sexual desires ("Drop him! He doesn't deserve you!"). No one is entitled to anything from a partner but if we want good relationships we have to contend with what's really important to our partners, not downplay it.
All of this. I completely agree. It’s grape culture
@@Yomel123no such thing as rape culture..look at the stats of how many men rape women vs the number of men in the world 😓😓
@@FirsToStrike You lose a lot of credibility when you try to equate these things. If you want people to listen to you, and not to downplay the seriousness of the issue, making slightly silly comparisons like this is not the way to go about it.
Being without sex (and other kinds of intimacy) is certainly no fun. And it's definitely challenging.
But it's of such different character to going without food that they aren't really comparable. And if you try to tell people these things are the same, the only thing that's going to happen is that people will stop listening to you.
You gotta watch the language you use as well. Misogynists use "witholding" to imply that there's some victimisation of men - that they're being manipulated by a controlling woman rationing out sex to get what she wants. While that does certainly occasionally happen - there are some abusive relationships where women use sex in this way - it only explains a small part of the problems men have with sex. Incels want to convince everyone that it's the norm because they want to blame everything on women.
@@JimFarrand sex can and is being withheld. But I'm not claiming it is out of manipulative intent (in most cases). I'm claiming it is out of the actual average differences in sexual desire, which men then have to compromise on. No one is entitled to more sex but no one is also entitled to keep a man in a relationship if he's not getting the amount of sex he craves. When women complain about the latter all the time, why can't men complain about the former?
And you missed my point. The reason many of us suffer without food is not cuz we're at the brink of starvation. Most of us never ever felt that. So when we compare the two in the level it causes psychological distress I think it is comparable actually. Another such "Need" is to feel supported or to have closed ones, the need to confide, the need for touch, the need to share one's life with others. You might say those are also all not "needs" cuz you won't die without them, but many studies show isolation is a terrible thing for humans, prisoners placed in solitary confinement actually exhibit brain damage, kids who are emotionally neglected are affected for life, and there's a lot of talk nowdays about touch starvation. People's needs are far more complicated than just basic food water shelter. That's just the first level on Maslow's hierarchy.
And no one's excusing rape here. You can't fulfill the need for touch by forcing cuddles on a person nor the need to confide by forcing a gun to someone's head asking them to listen to you. So I'm tired of the conversation being navigated there. The point is it's ok to to have needs, hold the other person accountable when they can't fulfill them, and go find someone else who will. And this goes for all gender and sexualities.
I think a lot of the people who argue that "Men need sex" are forgetting the fact that women have a sex drive as well. Not all men are these sexual monsterious animals who only want sex. There is a lot more to sex then just
⬜🔌. Sex can play an emotional bonding role between a couple. Sex is what you make it. Both men and women Should be able to enjoy sex. There is no shame in wanting sex,but excusing the mistreatment of others in order to obtain it is problematic.
If you have good communication with your partner you’ll have good sx because you’ll know what is comfortable for each other so you can experiment within those boundaries.
Good communication seems like a bourgeoisie construct.
@@atillathehun9031I can see that, but I think that depends on how clinical the communication you’re talking about is. There are all kinds of ways to communicate that just involve actually caring about both yourself and the other person, being brave, and paying attention.
Literally, everyone knows communication is important….
How do I communicate this to you? 🤔
@atillathehun9031 what do you mean?
yes lets go write in a notebook about "what is comfortable during sex" ..... tell me youve never had sex without telling me youve never had sex
Had to give a like for the “attracting as many butch lesbians as possible” 😂
Loved the video ❤
I had a butch lesbian as a roommate. She had to pay her wife to have sex with her.
We incels are right,women are the judges of a man worth in this society,making dating almost impossible for young men.
Here are some reasons why dating is impossible for young men feel free to dispute me:
There are more men than womeb specially below 40
More female asexuals than male asexuals
Women are much more picky,choosy,judgy specially in dating
Women They are much content alone than men, due in part to the little society punishment that single women have,single men suffer humiliation, degradation and displacement specially virgin men
Virgin men are unattractive to most women
Short guys(5'6 and below)are unattractive to almost all women
Men have to do the approach
Women have much lower sex drive than men and are more harder to arouse.
We are right in almost every point yet people like to lie.
Men are in the most risky jobs and also more men die in much more numbers and also die younger wtf,and women tell themaelves they are the ones that are opressed.disgusting gynocentric society.
Almost 44% of women experience DV in le/sbian relationships, including from butch women. So, unfortunately, there are no guarantees.
As a woman, wife and mother i want to add to the conversation.
Men dont take into account that we face all the risks of sex. Im the one who gets pregnant, im more likely to get some type of infection if i dont clean up afterwards, etc. So a lot of mental planning goes into for women than men.
And with this comes the fact that men tend to ask for sex at the most inconvenient time. A lot of husbands/long term boyfriends complain about a women's decrease in sex over time but we prepped and mentally prepared ourselves to meet up and have sex in the dating stage. Men dont like planned sex but thats what it was when yall were dating.
Last, men like to say sex is their stress relief. It just isnt for us women. And a lot of times (esp when married), what you need relief from is also stressing us which is decreasing our libido. Now we have added stress of releasing you wile adding on stress for us.
Sex maybe a "stress relief" for men, but it's such a turn off to be objectified like that.
One of the biggest problems I see from people is that they tend to think that females and males are extremely different. I'd never deny that there's some level of biological and social conditioning differences between us but the biggest places where I see differences between people are on the level of the individual. I've been surrounded by a bunch of females and males who all say "The other sex are just cheaters, jerks, stupid etc etc" and during my younger years I experienced stupid sexist thoughts purely based on the fact that I was dating females and not males. If all you ever date and want affection from is the opposite sex, you'll likely end up generalizing that group if things go wrong with them.
Personally, I'm very anti-violence. I only agree with a model called "The reasonable use of force". This means outside of a direct call to violence you cannot enact force upon another human unless they enact force upon you, you can only use force of what is reasonable to stop that force from being enacted upon yourself or someone else. Example would be that for me as a male, if a child, female or male who is weaker than me from my subjective view point attacks me or someone else, I might be able to put them in a headlock or restrain them until the police arrive. Perhaps I could even hit them once if I had to in order to protect myself and/or others. However if a gigantic mega male or some crazy jacked female attacks someone I can go all out until he/she is unable to continue his or her attack. I would advocate that children go as hard as they can as they're weaker than pretty much anyone and that females go hard against males on average for the same reason however females should use reasonable force against children in a lesser way unless it's a monolithic teenager typically. This all can change depending on whether or not the person has a weapon, a disability, old and frale, malnourished etc but that's why it's called "The reasonable use of force" because it's a subjective determination of what to do in those kinds of situations and requires someone with what we'd find to be reasonable common sense as everyone comes in all shapes and sizes and there's always outliers and exceptions to physical power within every group which is why we can't entirely generalize categories perhaps 10% of the time give or take.
My point in bringing this up isn't to virtue signal that I have a better stance on violence than other people, only that I have found this anti-violence opinion to be EXTREMELY rare from both males and females and maybe 1 in 100 people have it give or take. Most people I meet are perfectly fine with assaulting people based on whatever subjective means they wish to outside of force and typically don't care if violence is committed against a group they hate. There is no forgiveness and a wish for revenge against those they deem as against them.
Point of my comment is that in multiple ways, I've found far more differences between individuals and not between females and males where it is important.
What you call the reason able use of force makes perfect sense .
Ah, she's in it for the money, hurt people and lunatics will have her laughing all the way to the bank
Bingo. She's willing to hurt women in order to get her bag.
I once heard the difference between a friendship and a relationship being that a friendship is like a snack, that comes once in a while but a relationship is a dinner that requires consistent effort to make.
In this case though, without sex. There’s one less motivator in being consistent in a relationship. More important for some, less so for others.
This type of discourse around sex feels so negative and resentful. For anyone who wants to hear a really nice exchange of ideas about sex (one of the best ones I’ve heard lately) I recommend the episode of „diary of ceo” with Africa Brooke. There is a moment when they talk about sex and the host talks about what he was feeling when his gf told him she doesn’t want to have sex with him, and what they did as a couple after. It’s really great and it shows both mans and woman’s perspective. I highly recommend it, let’s all align ourselves with positive ideas about this subject, because it’s very intimate and it can make or break the relationship.
Before watching, I will say that it's pretty frustrating that the discourse around this topic tends to be so "sex is as necessary as food" on one side versus "a REAL man will do everything regardless of whether or not I'm giving him sex" on the other
Additionally, I don't get why it's so difficult for people to admit that withholding or placing requirements on sex (for good or petty reasons) is common within relationships, you can address that there are reasons for that without lying about it being a thing 😂😂
The moment you have to use the phrase "Real man" we as men understand you don't actaully know how we think.
@@gravesgPlenty of men use that phrase though. Often right before they push some narrow view of "real" manhood that suits them personally.
@@JimFarrand True, however It's easy to discern what makes sense based on the logic behind it. Alot of these "real men" phrases have no long term logic that makes sense.
I will say that a lot of times I see men portraying a woman’s aversion to having sex for whatever reason as “withholding” with the connotation that it’s being used as a manipulation tactic.
If my partner is treating my emotions poorly, I don’t feel the desire to have sex with them, and it’s not a conscious decision, it’s legitimately a lack of desire. Is that withholding, or is that simply not forcing myself to do something that feels wrong? I also happen to be the one with the higher libido in both my current and past relationship, but have been pressured/forced in my first relationship, so I understand both sides.
Yes, I totally agree that there's no good-bad dichotomy here. It's so varied and relationship-specific that trivialising it to a generic and baseless "women trap men in s_xless marriages" is a terrible statement and place to work from.
Red pill grifting for the whole family!
Makes me think of Pearl posting that video outing herself as a deeply insecure and pathetic person. Which is what red pillers always are regardless of gender.
Why is it a grift? Only because you don't like red pill content?
It's a grift because redpillers are profiting off of wishy washy speculative falsehoods whether or not they actually believe or endorse what they say.
@izdatsumcp cause they selling useless garbage courses
@@izdatsumcpPearl is the most obvious grifter ever 😂
From my limited philosophical understanding, patriarchy as a concept is as real as capitalism. Patriarchy is not straightforwardly put male at higher position than female, but fundamentally consider masculine qualities superior than feminine qualities. It is an intrinsic nature of our society and is fundamental to how our society award individuals. That’s why fertility rates keep dropping as females are pursuing traditionally male rules. I think our society is more patriarchal than ever.
As a side note I think the only feminine quality that is valued today is beauty.
is attractiveness expected of both genders ? fat men often are seen as failing at their gender as are women who do not reach beauty standards
Patriarchy = pursuit of power, aristocracy and neoaristocracy that emerges constantly from elites, not some peasant men living their lives in responsibility and guilt for sins nobles commit as feminists would make you believe. They don't know the terms they use, ask a female what is woman, what is feminism, what is patriarchy, they can't grasp even one concept correctly. This video shouldn't exist after just one sentence from the creator: "I never had an orgasm.". When you didn't have sex and want to pose as an expert on it you're a clown and all supporters of this channel reveal themselves as clowns too.
The patriarchal and dystopian view is that women should be giving up sex like it is a chore and that men's only way of expression of love is through sex. It's all social conditioning. Men should be able to have safer ways to express other than through sex and violence.
S/N when you mean feminism do you mean black or white feminism? Because there is a huge difference and meaning.
That is how men feel. You can’t say, “no men you’re wrong you should change your emotions “. Who says your opinion is correct?
It isn't dystopian. Men have a much higher sex drive, and normally want and (need) sex more frequently to remain within a satisfied bandwidth. This means that USUALLY women will have to provide more sex than they personally would want to for optimal comfort. That's fine. That's normal. Being in a relationship isn't always about being comfortable or having another being who entertains you. Men also have too look for ways, as partners, that they can bring and must also suffer somewhat, sometimes, to bring GREATER joy to their partner. Because the team is working together to build something (a family, so children, usually) that is fulfilling, and each member must necessarily be willing to suffer sometimes, to a degree, in order to complete the project, or bring greater joy to the others.
Wanting to alter the scales in some post-modernist way and say that women having sex somewhat more often than they would comfortably like is such a HUGE ask it must reduce their man to a groveling emasculated (the women will hate this man) dipshit is gross and unfair. Part of the expectation for women should be that they need to step up and deliver enough pussy.
Most people are just dicks who are takers, instead of givers. Most people want givers. They want a different set of behavior from their competitors, neighbors, or partners than the standard they would hold themselves to. I think women need the reality check since all of commercialism bends to them to affirm their feelings (so they will buy product) whereas men are still subject to criticism and can discuss their weaknesses. And yes historically women were groomed to be givers, and minimal receivers and takers and that wasn't fair.
Sex being a chore is definitely a female perspective. Enough of this toxic femininity please.
No, it's not the only way to express love but it is done out of love.
No, men aren't socially conditioned to want sex from their wives. Stop gaslighting like a toxic woman.
No, men won't become women and find 'safer' ways to express. You're just going to have to deal with it.
What do you mean when you say Black or White feminism?
Very interesting food for thought; thank you! I do tend to bracket black and white feminism under the broader umbrella of "political feminism", though I do find that (anecdotally) black feminism tends to have far more philosophical undertones thanks (not exclusively but largely) to Audre Lorde's work.
I’ve been with my bf for almost 7 years now and for some reason he thinks I just don’t want “it” but the fact of the matter is that I want it constantly sometimes it’s all I think about. The problem is the second I get into it. He’s done. And I have expressed this to him multiple times. It’s like getting in a car and going down the drive way then being like “we’re here” when we didn’t go anywhere. Then I have to figure out what to do because he’s tired. It’s not that all women don’t want “it” some women just really want good “it” something that last that feels good that doesn’t need a lot of detours. Or if there are detours they better be amazing!
I like how this boils down to communication and empathy. The more empathy and understanding we give in a relationship, the more likely it is we will be repaid in kind. But if we care only about our own feelings, what reason does our partner have to think of ours?
So many relationship problems are this simple.
If I ever have a disagreement or fight, I find it often results from trying to prove I am right. The funny thing is when I stop and talk about how the situation makes me feel, the other side will do the same and we can actually understand where each side is coming from and resolve the issue.
You're one of my favourite channels and I'm beyond grateful to you for suffering through hours of these self-hating women to bring us great commentary!
The one thing missing from this video and it's message, is that women should talk to their partners if they're uncomfortable or not enjoying sex. No man would want them to just lay there and take it. Talk to your husband. Tell him how's you feel. Tell him what you like and what you don't. Talk him through it. I'd really enjoy it if a lady talked me though how to pleasure her if I'm not doing it correctly. No man wants their wife or partner to suffer in silence. Talk
as a political philosophy major, hearing such an intense delineation between the two as entirely different perspectives within feminist critical analysis is certainly....something.
I like how Kidology thinks. Her working definition of the patriarchy is just really different from basically everyone else's. I don't mind her delineation. I agree with it, once I think about the context she provided. But yes, arguably, the patriarchy is still a thing and even society emphasing male sexual gratification more than women's is an example.
Allosexual people (people who feel sexual desires, opposite of asexual) don't need sex/sexual activity to survive
But sex does generally make allosexual people happier
Coercive sex is not happy, whether it be forcing someone to perform unwanted sexual acts, or intentionally witholding sex for malicious purposes (which is rare but still happens and a line needs to be drawn between simply not wanting sex and sexual abuse)
You mean normal people? yes
@@harsh3948 you're cooking in these reply lol
One side of the internet: “these women ran through”
The other side: “yall not f*ckin enough”
😂😂😂😂😂
Asexual men watching this:
The beginning is so annoying, sex is NOT just it. I’ve had these discussions with my husband. We’re in a better place but at one point I was working 2 jobs, taking care of 3 kids, cooking, cleaning, and keeping the house together. Sex was not even on my mind because I was overall exhausted. I was barely taking care of myself and yet expected to give sex to a man who I felt wasn’t helping me and he couldn’t even see that despite me speaking up. Yes I “dragged” him to couples therapy. There was a lot on both sides that needed to be unpacked and I’m grateful for those lessons. We are still married but we now have better communication and sex does not feel like a something on a list but it comes a lot more easily because he’s actually being a partner.
I was just so annoyed that this lady literally just put everything on women and made it seem so simple as if sex will just solve everything.
Most men in these comments would dismiss this because they truly believe women don’t offer anything besides sex in marriage, cooking and slaving away.. the fact that you worked 2 jobs to them would be you exaggerating because they don’t realize that outside of their “dominant society” women of color specifically black women carry a heavier burden because we’ve been taught to do it all to keep a man, and still get deemed as masculine.. it’s a lose lose
Imagine if instead of selling woman-hating courses telling men that their wives owe them sex, imagine if these grifters made courses teaching men how to get their wives to want to have sex with them. Courses which feature how to carry your emotional load in the relationship, how to properly do your portion of the chores without being asked, hygiene because apparently some men are out here not wiping their asses, fashion/style, etc. Basically the same things that women learn and seek information on. There's plenty of videos on feminine hygiene and seducing your man, but there's not the same kind of culture for men.
It’s called being a pickup artist
I'm not a Kevin Samuels fan, but he did tell men they needed to properly take showers and clean everywhere (he was graphic about it so it was clear what he meant) and stressed dressing well. So that was a start! It just was unfortunately couched with a bunch of other negative rhetoric.
@@C12341I was just about to mention KS telling men to "wipe your goddamn a--e!" Why do grown men need to be TOLD this? It's infantilization of men.
Men want the women hating crap to confirm their biases and to give them a reason as to why their partner or women in general don’t like them. Men don’t want to better
Even the worst grifters are too conscientious and compassionate to sell such obvious BS to their fellow men.
"You can't negotiate desire" is one of the most ironclad commandments of the redpill.
I've heard this narrative of sex being the most important thing ever when I was between 12-17, very impressionable age. And it took a huge toll on me. I only heard how often you need to have sex, what you have to practice in bed, how important it is, but what if it's not important to me? What if I don't want to do some specific things? Will that make me a bad girlfriend? I haven't heard about consent until the age of 20, and even now that I know about it, the toxic mindset about sex is still ingrained in me.
I feel like stuff like this always made me feel even more disinterested in marriage.
Because they make everything sound like a duty and an obligation.
When you have sex it should be because in that moment you desire that person so much that you want to have sex with them.
But so many people talk about sex in marriage like it doesn't matter how the woman feels. it doesn't matter if you just had a c section, you have to fuck your husband or else he'll cheat on you and you'll deserve it.
Like it sounds so annoying I'd rather be single.
It doesn't just sound annoying, but abusive.
It is a duty😂, just like the man is supposed to provide .
@@ephraimakoto3657 "is SUPPOSED to provide". Right, but a lot of dudes want 50/50, but require a full time worker, nanny, maid and sex worker in return.
Nah, the math ain't mathing.
What I find interesting is that men are put off marriage because they fear divorce. Women are put off marriage because they fear........marriage.
@@ephraimakoto3657ok Incel. My man chooses to provide but I buy the other stuff too, sex is never a duty. The fact you’re ok with having sex with someone that does not desire you, is incredibly sad icl. I initiate sex with my bf a lot of the time because I have a higher sex drive than him, I respect if he says no and will just use a toy or something. When he initiates it, I know he desires me and loves me, not that he’s doing it out of a “duty” lmao
Thank you for sharing your personal intimate story. I share this and it’s deeply embarrassing and lonely, it’s so affirming to hear I’m not alone.
This is infuriating, Kid but thank you for covering this anyways. Highly appreciated🙏🏾❤.
I h8 the shame that women like me get in relationships and elsewhere. I only really have sexual feelings about twice a month and I’m tired of that being seen as “difficult”.
its not being "seen" as difficult. it just can potentially BE difficult if you have a partner with a dramatically different libido as you. that fact is never going to change.
Twice a month? The women that are complained about is generally in the twice a year area
@@billyb6001 twice a month ain't much better
@@blackraven6049There is no difference between 2 and 24. Mmm........did you attend maths class?
@@rejectionisprotection4448 I've taught a college level Computer Science course in the past, so probably.
This was the first time I didn't skip the sponsor segment but instead actually listened to it
I don’t think men NEED sex just like women don’t NEED sex. I think the idea of where men “need” sex is due to probably the lack of physical love boys receive in life bc they need to be “masculine” can’t cry or dads can’t give physical love to their sons so they grow up thinking sex will make them feel something will make them feel “loved” or “wanted” but it’s not that…you can truly show love without sex, acts of gifts, words, cuddling, traveling together etc sex between two people in both women and men is a need or want to feel “loved” or “wanted” to lovemaking has turned into f**king…sex is ordinary and done with anyone and leaves you feeling unwhole bc it isn’t between someone you deem you “love” sex shouldn’t be a priority it’s an act of unselfishness to give yourself to another /: risking having a child, stds, spiritual attachment etc to another person in the act…immorality in this generation benefits off of the brokenness and the unwanted feelings men feel without them even knowing it…but instead of men realizing that they are furthering themselves from actually feeling “loved”.
It’s biology too. Testosterone literally makes men think about and want sex more on average. During ovulation women get a tiny bump in testosterone specifically to make them want to copulate more. During ovulation is the only time I’m acutely aware of other men(I’m married).
My husband explained it once as how I need conversation that’s how sex in a relationship is for him.
Why do women love to talk around the fact men like sex? Explaining it away like that... Sex is fulfilling cuz it means we get something we want, from a person who lets us have it, cuz we've passed their criteria for desirability. Since being desirable isn't something most men can take for granted, it feels really nice when someone wants us to do what we wanna do to them. It feels empowering, to feel a woman melt in your arms, knowing your power on her (in terms of attraction, not physical overpowering) and how willing she is to give you the power to do what you want with her. That should be based on trust and genuine feelings for one another, don't get me wrong, but it's definitely very sex centered and isn't because of a lack, it's an enhancement, and a healthy one at that. Stop pathologizing it.
Its the affection i need i kno that for sure
Of course both sexes need sex dummy it’s literally the sole reason we are on this earth . Most men have no options and most women have too many to choose how can women ever understand ?
@@rationalfemale5717 isn't it progesterone not testosterone during ovulation?
My ex had a problem in her previous failed marriage where her ex husband withheld s3x from her. It did cause her emotional pain.
Why are some ppl evil like this?
Imo nobody is entitled to s*x, and if someone is able to use it as a tool to cause pain, it's only cause they're not attracted to their partners.
@@nevergiveup9937 you been watching too many Disney movies , do you know human nature ?
Why only women's emotional pain is taken seriously in this matter?
@@zaihoupersonal1635 surprised?
Im so sorry u had bad experiences 😢 Thank You for sharing so we don’t feel like the only ones, and for the well informed video❤️
And I hope that lady takes therapy, and stop going on the internet to spread toxic views
Just recently discovered your channel and there are some things I feel I must say. Your ability to peel back the surface of seemingly straightforward topics and dissect them so thoroughly and with such impartiality is truly admirable. It is so hard and so contrary to human nature to commit to real impartiality when it comes to these kinds of topics. It's easy and it's comfortable to simplify things in our mind. I've always struggled with this tendency to see things in black and white (as nearly all of us do!) but you really have inspired me to work harder and do better on that front. I hope you keep making these thought-provoking video essays and challenging your audience to think critically rather than assuming that the most obvious answer is always the right one.
i LOVE how honesty you are!!! you are amazing and honest and this is the reality for a lot of people and i wish we could have more convos like you share. its really amazing and helpful and thank you!!!~!!!!!
"I don't believe in patriarchy"
"Men have been blaming women for everything since the beginning of time"
Both statements can be true at the same time?... She just means she doesn't subscribe to the idea that in modern times in first world countries women are unable to accomplish just as much as men, sincr there are no longer any institutional structures in place stopping women from doing pretty much anything a man can do. But it's still true historically women have been oppressed.
I don't see how those are contradictory statements.
Another uniquely fascinating kidology video
Thank you 💕
It feels so freeing to see I’m not the only one that struggles immensely with shame about my body and masturbating like everything you’ve described I’ve dealt with too personally ❤ I appreciate your willingness to speak about it
35:52 finally, someone said it. I have been raised in a way to not waste myself on meaningless relationships, and, at that time I was praised for that choice as wise, "true" feminine, etc. Now, in my twenties, I'm shamed by same people for not having enough sexual experience. For being boring.
I am not even through the first two minutes of this video, and that was more internalized misogyny packed into less than two minutes, than I have heard in entire years of my life. And that's by no means an exaggeration! Wow!
I feel like that woman really just projects and her audience eats it up. It’s sad, really.
Thank you Kidology. I am always learning from you. I'm always so happy every time you upload. Woooooo. Sorry- just so happy to listen and think about things that feel uncomfortable at first :)
The idea that women "choose" to be dependent on men is flawed because it assumes women have other options...i cant "choose" if im being coerced
Women do have options.
They have the option of education towards a lucrative job to avoid such situations.
If you set yourself up in life with nothing, your options are nonexistent.
@@wyleecoyotee4252 coercion
Got it IntroLady. I'm the problem. This is why I won't marry or have kids, you see. I'm just so defective that I have no place in any modern household, so surely you can agree I should live happily alone and unbothered, right?
Feels bad, right? That's what men feel when they are made responsible for women's feelings. NOPE.
@galek75 ooh, is that little quip supposed to hurt me or make mad? 🤣 "Responsible for women's feelings?" Dudeman. I literally implied the opposite. Why do men have to make EVERYTHING about them? Jesus christ. This is about women hating on women. 🙄
@@NoThanksX I didn't make it about men. If you have a brain you can see the discourse blames men for problems none of them created. Like your little reaction here. And I thought women were smart 😢😢
Absolutely.
Such an important convo and v well covered. I wish my younger self was exposed to these conversations, and I hope there are lots of young women who come across
I don't share all your sentiments, but I really adore how empathetic and well-researched your videos are. Thank you for sharing your viewpoints!
Never having an orgasm is a crime fr. Some women are missing out.
Woah that intro tho...I hear tears behind that wife's words. She calls herself happy?...hmmm...
I agree, GOOD sex is part of a healthy relationship. Great discussion and great analogy!
Please KNOW you deserve pleasure! You do. You do.
Thank you for saying that, reading these comments it seems like staying single really is the best option.
Elderly fossil white ♀️ with pink hair
As someone that has been married for 22 years, all the intro clips from that lady are spot on! I've never had my feelings/opinions put into such precise wording. my wife and I have been to 4 different Marriage Therapists/counselors (two church affiliated and 2 secularly educated). Three of them were horrible experiences. The last one really helped us out a lot, though. A lot of counseling seems to be done by people who want a "good profession" that pays well and not so much by people who genuinely want to help others. Thanks for sharing, Kidology.