If you live with a narcissist long enough do you become one? I see this in my female relatives that have lived with one for 50 years. She became a bully, and hateful.
Narcissists move VERY fast in relationships. It's not uncommon to hear, “I love you", and/or be bombarded with love songs/texts/memes a few weeks after meeting them. By rushing into sex/intimacy, they fast-forward the relationship. They get their targets to fall for them before he/she can realize something is amiss. I believe this is also the reason they tend to be VERY good lovers. Sex is usually the “hook” in toxic relationships. Narcissists lack genuine personalities. So, they mirror their targets. If you find you have “so much in common" with a new person, your likes are their likes, and your dislikes are coincidentally their dislikes as well, raise your antennas! They may be mirroring you. This is the “soulmates" hook… You'll also notice that they'll spend more time telling you who they are, verses showing you. As time goes on, you'll notice the words they used to describe themselves do not fit their personality - at all. But, they will fit YOURS!!! Passive-aggressive behavior and irrational/unexplained anger, are also major red flags. Pay attention to how a person treats you the first time you say, “No”, and/or when things don't go their way… If they give you the silent treatment, grow cold, and/or pull away, do not overlook it! Most importantly, if someone pulls away, or goes silent, after you set a boundary - DO NOT pursue them! This is how they groom you to be the chaser in the relationship. It's emotional abuse/manipulation! Pay close attention to people who portray themselves as victims. NOTHING is EVER their fault! EVERYONE, including the family pet, has done them wrong… ALL of their ex's are “crazy” and mistreated them… They’re great, but no one appreciates said greatness… Simply put, it's bullshit! No one should have a laundry list of bad experiences. If they do, RUN, because they're the common denominator! Narcissists tend to have a history of failed/short-term relationships. Believe it or not, it's hard for Narcissists to find people to deal with them long term due to their instability and poor behavior… Superficial relationships/friendships. I've noticed they don't have anyone they're genuinely close to. This is due to their inability to bond and form true attachments to people. Their relationships are shallow and based on surface-level bs. They'll refer to someone as their bestfriend, but you’ll notice they barely speak. Or, that the person is never really around. Or, only shows up when it's time to party, etc. They may also speak down on/poorly of said “bestfriend” behind their back. Narcissists tend to be condescending, two-faced and downright mean! Based on my experience, they cannot talk about deep subjects (i.e. fears/emotions). Or, how a situation truly made them feel. Or, what their childhood was like in detail… They don't want to go there. I suspect, it's because they can't. They don't know themselves well enough. They can't connect. They also live in a world of dishonesty. They're very dishonest with themselves about who they truly are. A poor relationship with their Mother/primary caregiver. Underlying issues between Narcissists and their Mother's (abuse, neglect, don’t get along, etc.), seems to be common. People that I've known who've displayed strong Narcissistic tendencies, ALL had bad relationships with their Mothers! I think it's worth mentioning, their Mother's also displayed strong Narcissistic traits… I'm fully aware and understand that there are healthy adults who have toxic Mother's. However, if you're spotting several red flags in an individual, including this one, pay closer attention! They're selfish! Some are selfish from the very beginning. Some start out generous and slowly begin withholding. Some act helpless and needy. They manipulate people into doing things for them, but never give back. It's not only financial and material selfishness. They're selfish emotionally, affectionately, conversationally. sexually and with their attention. They withhold validation and support. EVERYTHING has to be about them, their needs, their wants and everything happens on their terms. Anger, rage, silent treatments and disappearing acts are common - when they don't get their way. Pathological lying. Narcissists are professional liars. It's their second nature. If you call them out, they'll have no issue staring deeply into your eyes as they tell another lie! You'll hardly ever get the truth. Even with unchallengeable proof of the truth, they'll hold on to the lie. It's actually quite fascinating to see them in action - once you know what you’re dealing with. They also have the uncanny ability to provoke doubt in their victims (even when you KNOW the truth), because their lies are so convincing! Beware of people who do not seek conflict resolution. Many Narcissists enjoy drama/chaos! Remember, these are high-conflict personalities. Many of them NEED to argue and fight! Peace to a narcissist, is what chaos is to non-disordered people - unsettling. This is why they repeat behaviors that trigger a negative response. They need tension, anger and high/out of control emotions. They're known for calling people crazy, drama queens, insecure, etc., but never admit what they did to provoke those responses. And, when you attempt to discuss/resolve something, THEY said/did, they’ll gaslight, stonewall and/or flip it back on to you. They're extremely disrespectful, rude and lack self-awareness. They have an issue with being called out on their behavior and project/deflect to avoid accountability. “Normal” people want to get along, for the most part. So, they seek fair compromises when conflict arises. Narcissists want to “win” and conflict IS their niche. This is how many Narcissists get their way - they wear people down via conflict. Immaturity. It’s one thing to be playful and lighthearted (in appropriate settings), as an adult. It’s something completely different to be immature. Narcissists suffer from arrested development. They do not know how to respond to situations/people/stress/life appropriately. They have a child-like mindset. They truly believe everything is about them and have no concept of the needs of others. By nature, children are takers. They have no concept of reciprocation. They believe their Parents (and everyone else), exists to meet their needs. When their needs aren’t met, or they don’t get what they want, they become mean and throw tantrums. Narcissists cannot think outside of themselves and their wants/needs - like children. They’re completely unaware that people are individuals with their own agency, needs, wants, opinions... They truly believe people exist to serve them. They believe their job is to receive. They’re children trapped in adult bodies, who cannot consider anything/anyone other than themselves! Above everything I've stated, trust your intuition! Narcissists give off an uneasy vibe. They try very hard to appear cool, calm and collected - on the surface. But, you can feel their energy. It's very off-putting. They also tend to have more noticeable negative qualities, than most people. But, you have to stop justifying and making excuses, in order to see things clearly. Accept people for who they are and not who you want them to be. Observe, listen and trust yourself. No one should be allowed to grant themselves a position in your life. Vet people and YOU decide if they'll be a liability, or an asset, to you. Lastly, take cues from your body. If you ever feel your mood changing, feel anxious or feel your stomach knot up, in the company of someone, don't dismiss it! It could be a sign that you're in bad company!!! Additionally, If you need to find out about a cheating narcissist; send a request to: MetaspyHub@gmail. com
I wasted 3 years with this man thinking he could change but he only got worse!! The very first paragraph through to the last is 100% accurate in my experience 😔
💯 agreed my x narc husband did three marriages in 10 years and in presence of 1st wife now he is with his frst wife and 3rd whi is secreetly married with him from 1year and some month if dating now disclose his 3rd marriage after 1 year
Thank you for this information. I’m struggling a lot after being unfairly discarded by the woman I love. I know I should just move on, but I’m drowning in heartache. Are you able to speak about my situation? Thank you very much.
AGREED! They can go to space and stay foreger! My ex husband tried SO HARD to get me to say that I wanted a divorce, and I kind of knew what he was doing, so I NEVER SAID IT. I would always say, "No, I don't want a divorce, I just want you to stop lying." Or , "No, I don't want a divorce, I just want you to stop staring at porn 8 hours a day." Or whatever. I knew he wanted me to say it so he could blame everything on me. At least I was wise enough not to do that. He is gone and I am still alive.
That’s what got me through my breakup with the narcissist. I left him, but I still thought about him all the time. I found out he married another woman and I thought, good, he’s someone else’s problem now, not mine. I didn’t need that narcissistic abuse back in my life. But I did feel sorry for her.
@kgs2280 but you literally sound like the narcissistic one here... It sounds like he moved on with his life and is loved and happy while you are bitter and alone, stuck being your own problem...
@@MrGodgivemeaname You couldn’t be more wrong. A few months after I left him, I met a wonderful man who showed me what love really looks like, and we were married some months after that. I don’t know how soon the old boyfriend got married, but I only heard about it a few years later. I was long over him by that time.
The only final discard happens when you realize the narc is not worth it- not your love, your time, your effort. When you finally decide to go no contact and disappear from the narc’s life.
Recovering from a narcissists betrayal is slow at best, one day at a time. First you have to recognize it: understand that the issue, the problem does not lie within you. We all do and say things in relationships that we wish we hadn't, that we can't take back…however it is in recognizing this that steps can be taken to correct and become better in our interactions with others. Narcissists cannot do this, it's always someone else's fault, they cannot genuinely look at themselves and see the need for improvement. The pain they inflict is very real and very hurtful. Being betrayed isn't a fault of the one being betrayed, but the cause of the betrayer. Loving someone that betrays you hurts…loving someone that has no empathy for the pain they've caused is maddening. Once you recognize it, can see it for what it is then is time to move on to acceptance. Accepting the fact that another person, a narcissist, has no empathy for your pain, the pain they've caused, isn't easy. Accepting the fact they just don't have the level of care, love, self awareness is a must though. Understanding and accepting that this relationship will never be what you had envisioned is key to recovering. A narcissist just isn't capable of having a relationship on that level, they are simply not capable to work through the many ups and downs, the kinks, of a relationship. Maybe their fault, maybe not but the facts are still the same..the end result is still the same. It's highly doubtful that you'd ever get a narcissist to see where they are wrong, to see the pain they've caused, what they see and what they look at is themselves, all else is really a mute point for them. So, in my opinion, trying to get them to see, to understand, the pain inflicted only hinders the recovery process. Finally when recognizing and acceptance have taken place, one needs to find a place within them where they can forgive. Forgiveness comes from love, and it's really more for the injured party than the narcissist themselves. Forgiveness facilitates healing. Hatred and anger only breeds bitterness within a person. Take what you can from a relationship with a narcissist, take peace, love for others and leave the narcissist and bitterness behind. Take comfort in knowing you do have value as a human being, your value does not come from others, especially a narcissist who can only really see themselves. Such a sad way to exist really when you think about. Satisfaction from within a relationship is a mutual thing, the give and take on both sides, the narcissist will never know that great satisfaction of a true, committed relationship. (Commitment to to see it through and make personal improvements) Additionally, If you suspect cheating or other forms of manipulation and need to gather evidence for your own peace of mind, you may consider reaching out for assistance. For more information, you can contact: Barryinvestigation@gmail. com.
Prob is that teachers are narcissists more often than the average Joe...Same in politics, everywhere, where you can flex with your power.... I'm for strong parents. Kids learn some cr00ked stuff in schools, nowadays.
The problem with this idea is that it is a rampant phenomena and wouldn't. be politically accepted in any system. Just look at the average psychologist,domestic abuse advocate,until probably recently,the depth, acknowledgement and scope of this remains obscured.
@@entity0xyep. Same thing happened some years back with bi-polar disorder I think it was. The amount of people throwing around the term gaslighting without knowing its meaning is ridiculous. The moment you dont see eye to eye now a days its because you’re a narcissist. Truly awful how quickly humans destroyed its meaning.
My ex bf stood me up on my birthday, after that, I was done, no more. He was accusing me of being with other guys, going out and drinking, which I was not doing, I didn’t beg or cry like I had before, I said, “ok, it’s fine, I understand” and didn’t give him a chance to respond, I blocked him. He came to my house about a week later, I didn’t answer the door of course. I was done with the disrespect. That was about 9 months ago. Stay strong guys! We got this. ❤
They never change don't look back the worst thing you did was show him that he hurted you that made him feel real good inside.my ex boyfriend is now my Covert Narcissists husband and guess what he got worser they never change. Save yourself find someone else better who treats you right.
@@EricaChavira-on4ozNo shit that's why the hell. I said don't look back move on.I don't want you to make the mistake I made.😢 women to women. RUN 🏃♂️ 🏃♀️
Thank Danish, is it me or is it a thing.... after 22 yrs I told my husband I'm done. No he spends all his time with our middle child & HIS friends. He has 4 children but chooses to spend his time with ONLY ONE child. Is it me or do all narcs have NO TRUE friends of his own age. I know he's doing it just for supply, feeling like big man in front of 20 yr olds..... he's 47
True. Indifference is the outcome of healing. You know when it’s over when you become indifferent to the narcisist and anything they do or say. They become someone you used to know.
Every single one of them have the same mind ! Disturbing . I’d give anything to be able to go back and walk right past this monster at 17 years old. 22 years later here I am in the remains of what a covert narcissist has left behind .
I am 67 and have not awakened to the truth until the last 2 years. I also should have left when I was a teenager but my mind was damaged by trauma bonds. No matter what age the light bulb goes on, at one point we must leave. Staying in these relationships is too damaging. Walk away, let them go!! Who cares what people think? God knows the truth and one day they will have to face Him! Love yourself!
And I bet you will remain as far as you're still trying to meet someone you're not anymore. Please.consider: if you were 17 again, you would have done the same one time and another. You don't have to go back in time to rescue from your past. You have to get over it. Life is not going to give you a 2nd chance unless you start telling yourself: "Yes, it's true. I met a monster and I survived. Now I'm starting over knowing that I will be fine and do better next time. I'm not done". Then, life starts again. ❤
emijean8391 Yes, I was married to a narc for 9 years. I am glad that I am alive. I hope that you find a healing path and keep loving yourself. Don't give up no matter what! It will take time, but it can get better. Just try to forget about all the nasty stuff and when you notice yourself thinking about it, do something for yourself, or something you find fun, or call someone for support. Love yourself! ❤
I publicly exposed my ex when I did a reality show. He was so embarrassed and mad. Best decision ever bc my truth set me free and let him know I wasn't dealing with his shhhh anymore. He never hoovered me again! 🙏🏽✨️
@tinaleigh3273 you literally did the narcissistic thing this dude in the video describe narcissists of doing. You ran a smear campaign against your ex because you are a narcissist.
@@MrGodgivemeaname sometimes you have to play their game to get rid of them evil mfs so no not necessarily it doesn’t make them one. They go through great lengths to fck with you mentally, emotionally and physically so I say all this to say if they got rid of the narc completely by doing that, then kudos to them. Trust they caused harmed to them 10X worse.
Yess! u go girl but idk, i've heard some of these people who give advice on narcs, that they actually like it when you do that to them, like they just like any negative/positive thing, but idk. hopefully he got what he DESERVED!
@thethe4665 you have people here justifying fighting narcissistic behavior with narcissistic behavior. At what point does the narcissistic abuse end? At what point is it not hypocritical? At what point is the cycle broken? At what point do people reflect on their own tendencies and rise above this? At what point is there a path for redemption and a better world?
Mine just started actIng funny again. Not communicating, not asking me to come over as much, claiming to be working more, just missing in acton basically. I know it's someone else but I still miss him. 🥺Dear God, please remove this man from my life COMPLETELY!
Oh you've patience counting so high, prob same amount with me and older overt coke head sis, I'm very satisfied with not being pushed to change my number, they inconvenience me enough!😊
In my experience & research narcs are never really gone. They always linger in the background & many do try to come back & see if you are still open to their bs. It's common 4 narcs to keep their exes around if possible
They always lose. They're losers. God never lets them get away with their games. I have witnessed them wither away like weeds. They destroy themselves.
I decided to not take revenge on my horrible ex and this is exactly what happened to her. What she did was atrocious, and wow did the Lord punish her big-time because I stayed out of the bad energy circle. This definitely opened my eyes.
I've only endured this for 3 years and I've experienced all the emotional abuse you mentioned. I can't imagine people that have been in it for decades. I can't imagine your mind
@@jesus_is_life_love2932 stay very calm. Don't give out your info. Let her tell whatever she wants to tell. Don't reply, don't clarify. Take a lot of time to think. Tell her that you are not ready to discuss anything at this point in your life. Just be happy that she took the garbage out of your life. If it feels like she is suffering, understand that it's not your responsibility to save her. She has to do her own thinking, and take her own decisions.
I have grown up in a conventional family with four brothers, being the only daughter and the youngest. Yes, we had out internal family feuds, sibling rivalry and all that, but all that never affected me much because I was able to function as a normal person, work, party and enjoy myself, had great friends, everything was fine. Nothing killed my spirit, any incident. But when I met him, and married him, I didint realise until now that I am good for nothing. I lost myself, I dont know if I will ever be able to rise back up. Yes there was physical abuse of the worst kind everytime I called him out on his behaviour, but somehow what has impacted me is the mental and emotional abuse. I just cant believe how I allowed that to happen, why did I ? I wish I could erase the last 7 years of my life. Forget about finding supplies after the separation, he had them while he was with me. Those blatant lies, that shrewd sense of confidence, the arrogance. its all demonic.
please never give up on your healing journey, you will come through i was married to one for 40years and 7years post divorce he is still smearing me for 5years i have worked on myself so i am healed so i don"t care about the weasel"s smear campaigns you will make it blessings
I was in a web of absolute lies, deception and illusions. The covert narcissist had planned his discard meticulously ahead of time. One by one, his masks began to fall. He became vile and hateful towards me for no reason. He looked at me like he loathed me, was jealous and vindictive. Like I was his arch enemy. One by one, people we knew in common began to rapidly turn on me. All of this happened in the exact same timeline. The common friends were his flying monkeys who he had secretly convinced to betray me with his false smearing. I witnessed the shocking chain of events and understood this was no coincidence. I felt it in my gut even though I couldn’t understand it. The discomfort became so colossal that I ended up blocking this narcissist and every single person associated with him and supporting him in their hate against me. I did this for protection and self preservation and to heal. I have purged false people from my life and now developed a radar for narcs. I’m grateful for the lessons but would never want anyone to experience the abuse I did with various narcs in my life. Thanks Danish.
@@MauveBlossom It’s like you summarized my story word for word. Sometimes, it’s hard to even begin to tell it and the only way I can describe what I experienced is “it was like a lifetime movie”. The discard from a covert narcissist is nothing short of absolutely brutal. It’s been a couple years since the discard for me and I’m getting to a place of indifference I guess you can say. I had no choice but to walk away from all connections to the past as it was going to be the demise of me if not. The false narratives, the smear campaign, character assassination, it was all too much. Just wanted to say I send hugs and love your way in your healing journey. I know all too well 🤍.
@@emijean8391 Hugs and healing energies to you, friend of the Light. I am glad to hear you overcame and freed yourself. The hardest part is now over. Stay focused on healing and evolving from this experience. Transmute the pain into superpowers and strengths. Nourish your mind, body, soul and work towards honing your higher self. Your empathy is a treasure, and I know you will honour it for that. You are whole, complete and enough. You are worthy of giving and receiving the purest love, respect and compassion. Love yourself. The universe supports you. Together, we will all heal and ascend.
My ex always said 'gotta leave your options open'. I quickly learned what that meant.t That's why he never cut ties with anyone, his boss, coworkers, his hook ups, his family, but talked horribly about them all behind their back.
I had the reverse discard. After i started divorce my Ex-Husband married before me. It was impossible to stay any longer in this house, now i am the monster, my own children and the complete relatives are my enemies. Very painful experiance in my life, no contact to 5 children and 12 grandchildren. But Jesus Christ helped me, so i can live a good life now. The narcisst is leaded through demons and they are pure evil. I forgive them and trust in god. Thank you for this very good explanation.
My ex's favourite quote was "the hardest thing in the world is the coldness of indifference". I used to ask him there are uncountable words that have been said and you chose these cold words? This quote is chilling. When he discarded, betrayal trauma was so severe that I had to walk around clutching myself to keep my heart from bursting out. And I didn't had closure. Then when I learned about narcissism, then finally the pieces of puzzle fell together suddenly and I could finally see the truth and was able to make peace with myself.
Good thing my ex could not do that with MY FAMILY AND TRUE FRIENDS! He may have convinced HIS family, friends, and enablers that I was the evil one....Good thing I don't need anyone close to him in MY life! 🙌🏾
Glad your family and friends are able to see it! My sister just went through this but luckily I know all about narcs due to an old friend who stalked me and emotionally abused me. His family have all taken his side despite him being addicted to coke and having multiple DUIs to the point where he can't drive without a breathalyzer. Yet he still borrows other people's cars (including my sister's) so he can drive drunk. Yet he's convinced his family that my sister is a "crazy alcoholic" who has "emotional outbursts" because she was crying and screaming during one of their last fights. She had finally had enough and started sticking up for herself, and he used it to his advantage. When she claimed he hit her, he was able to convince everyone that it was an accident because she was "freaking out and crying" and "super drunk." Nevermind he was high on God knows what and also inebriated. And nevermind that she only started drinking when he came into her life. She was a shell of her old self up until this past month after finally ending things! He'd already started his smear campaign, fortunately, (i say fortunately since that means it's OVER for good!) but thankfully all of my sister's friends and of course our family are there for her because we understand what was going on. She was sad to lose everyone in his family because they're very nice people, but better to lose them than the people who really matter! So many narc victims are left completely alone in the end. Their own friends and family are fooled by the narc, and it breaks my heart to think about it. Glad both of you have good people in your life it sounds, and congrats on being free from the narc!!!
I hope there is a justice system in place for narcissistic people. It's damaging your mental health when you are in this relationship. These people have no empathy or sympathy that they do anything to break you into pieces. I hope and pray that people who have been through this situation will get out of it because it's never easy to get out of a narcissist after being trauma bonded. Have faith and pray because this experience will teach you to be strong, resilient, and have faith in order to get out of it and be free. ❤
Just happened to me in last couple of days.When i got to know that she is a covert Narcissist, i said all the truth about her on her face and at that time she was cheated on me for several time with another guy . As always she ready her next supply by manipulating him and finally discard me bcz she can't tolerate the truth about her and i just unwear her fake mask
Mine would purposely pick a fight and then tell me I needed to go visit my family/parents, send me off with the kids for two to three weeks. And then bring me home. He would do this every three to four months. When I started understanding some of this behavior, I'd refuse to participate in his manipulation. I'd ask him why he wanted to fight/argue with me. And I'd tell him I refused to argue. That would only infuriate him more. He'd explode and demand I leave immediately. So no matter what he would discard and bring me back. But to the outside world it looked like I was the one leaving and crawling back.
yes !! good job. but now work on the inside. and cleanse sleff off their energy. otherwise when you get away from them, you will meet them in a different body
Danish, I just want to say thank you for your videos, they have opened my eyes and helped me place boundaries and start healing from my ex properly. On behalf of everyone healing from narcissistic abuse syndrome, thank you.
@@SarahEvans-e3gsame. That’s exactly what I’m going through now. He stalks me makes me think he will beat me up if I test him. I think I’m his ultimate supply berceuse I’m a huge empath it’s fkn annoying.
Danish I swear you were a fly on my wall. So on point with the reverse discard, he abused me that if I were to recount someone will think I’m making it up. It was wild! And of course he already had a new supply who he married 5 months after divorce but plays victim. My kids and I were discarded like shit but we are healing and thriving day by day . Thanks Danish for making me realize I AM NOT CRAZY!
Me also after 7.5 years of separation. He’s come into some $$$ and already gradually pre discarding hopefully he serves me divorce papers. I been ready to sign those papers
Unfortunately, infidelity tends to go hand in hand with narcissism. Especially, somatic narcissism. Narcissists believe EVERYTHING they need is external, including self-worth, self-esteem, validation, etc. Those things are what make up our inner world and we are supposed to develop and cultivate them within/on our own. Narcissists DEPEND on people to supply those things for them. Because we cannot (nor, are we supposed to) supply every want/need of a partner, narcissists are always on the lookout for "better supply". They will always gravitate toward anyone they feel can meet the needs/wants their spouse isn't (and can't). Narcissists are unstable and they cannot soothe themselves. They cannot meet their own needs and their needs/wants are constantly changing. Narcissists are black holes. They are human abyss' of unmet needs/wants. Even if you gave them everything, they'd still want MORE... All while giving NOTHING in return. Narcissists are also pathologically bored. They do not experience boredom the way normal adults do. They're like children. Once they become bored, they tend to throw their toys (people) in a corner to collect dust. Then, they search for new ones... Untilllll, they realize that their newest toy isn't as fun. Or, it doesn't function as well as the old toy did. Then, they'll go digging in the corner to find that old toy (the reason their relationships tend to be off and on). People are objects meant to keep them occupied and entertained. The newer the toy, the better/more exciting it is. However, EVERYONE will inevitably lose their shine with the narcissist. You must accept their reality and realize that it's NOT ABOUT YOU and it never was. This is also the point when it becomes crucial to sit your ego on the curb. Your ego will want to fight to be seen. Your ego will want to fight to prove you're enough. Your ego will feel it's "worthy" of the narcissist and fight to "keep" them... But, again: IT'S NOT ABOUT YOU. Most narcissists are extremely irresponsible. Many of them marry to secure stability. Or, to have someone they can count on to help with bills to free up their resources. It also ensures they'll have somewhere safe to land when they fall - because they always f*** up... Do yourself a favor and pull that rug of security out from under them and save YOURSELF. Narcissists do not have a moral compass. They do not respect the union of marriage. It'll always be a one-sided arrangement with you being the giver that's making their life easier and them being the taker that's making your life harder. We deserve the same love, attention, support and understanding that we give our spouses. You will never get it from someone suffering with NPD. Moreover, if you feel sure that your husband might never cheat on you, you might have to rethink. Most wives in marriages are shocked when they find out their husband cheating, and it happens more with people who never thought they would cheat. This is why you have to take the tiniest suspicion carefully. If your husband is cheating on you, the best and probably the only guaranteed way to catch him is to spy on their phones. However, spying on a phone is not something you can do without any external help unless you have the James bond level of spy skills. In such case you will need an expert phone spyier Metaspyhub@gmail. com for the purpose,,,
@MrGodgivemeaname doesn't sound like they need it, they've used their heart and brain to analyze and help themself. You, however? Need more than help.
@pinkyalmeroth3702 unlike you I actually have seen professionals in therapy and worked through my issues and traumas. It sounds pretty narcissistic thinking that all a person would need is confirmation from their own feelings and thoughts to work through things instead of breaking away from their narcissistic perceptions of things by actually talking to others and gaining more outside perspective on things. I find this channel is littered with covert narcissists in the comment section selectively cherry picking the parts they want to hear instead of actually doing self reflection on how this all applies to them because everyone on earth shares some narcissistic traits. You need professionals though to actually diagnose someone with narcissistic personality disorder, they can't just be an ex who you are obviously still mad at. This is literally what a covert narcissist would do by laying blame instead of actually doing any self reflection.
@MrGodgivemeaname And assuming someone hasn't gotten help isn't narcissistic? And for some, yes, confirmation and experience are our diagnoses. When you've been raised by narcs, have dealt with them your entire life, and been in countless relationships with them, you will know what you're dealing with at some point and all a professional is good at and getting paid for, is to listen and help you navigate the process of breaking the trauma bond and moving on with your life and thriving. You gotta do the work. No one can do that for you. And yes, almost every video on this thread about narcs is flooded with narcs in the comment sections. I've said that many times!!! They love to debate, challenge, and word salad conversations, thriving from the attention, negative or positive, much like you have done with everyone in this section. As much as people want to believe everyone is acting from a place of narcissism to justify their own behaviors, that's just not completely true. If you're not here to encourage, support, or just give positive feedback to those of us who have and still are dealing with abuse, then go to the narcissistic side of youtube and vent there and victim blame, cuz we don't need that kind of foolishness over here.
@@MrGodgivemeaname And assuming someone hasn't gotten help isn't narcissistic? And for some, yes, confirmation and experience are our diagnoses. When you've been raised by narcs, have dealt with them your entire life, and been in countless relationships with them, you will know what you're dealing with at some point and all a professional is good and getting paid for, is to listen and help you navigate the process of breaking the trauma bond and moving on either your life. You gotta do the work. No one can do that for you. And yes, almost every video on this thread about narcs is flooded with narcs in the comment sections. I've said that many times!!! They love to debate, challenge, and word salad conversations, thriving from the attention, negative or positive, much like you have done with everyone in this section. As much as people want to believe everyone is acting from a place of narcissism to justify their own behaviors, that's just not completely true. If you're not here to encourage, support, or just give positive feedback to those of us who have and still are dealing with abuse, then go to the narcissistic side of youtube and vent there and victim blame, cuz we don't need that kind of foolishness over here..
Interesting video, My relationship of 5 years ended a month ago. The love of my life decided to leave me, I really love her so much I can’t stop thinking about her, I’ve tried my very best to get her back in my life, but to no avail, I’m frustrated, I don’t see my life with anyone else. I’ve done my best to get rid of the thoughts of her, but I can’t, I don’t know why I’m saying this here, I really miss her and just can’t stop thinking about her..
its difficult to let go of someone you love, i was in a similar situation, my relationship of 12 years ended, but i couldnt just let her go i did all i could to get her back, i had to seek the help of a spiritual counselor who helped me bring her back
Hi Danish ❤ contradicting you this time, I don’t think so there’s final discard ever actually, they always comeback and hoover when they get bored of the new supply and finds you more interesting and valuable
This is 1000% true. I lost so many friends over the smear campaign. I never knew what a narcissist was until I looked up Why does Someone ignore you for months at a time. That’s how I learned about the disorder. It devastated me to the core. I never thought I would survive this pain. It’s almost five years since the discard. It took all these years of therapy to get me through the worst imaginable thing I’d ever been through.. he had everyone convinced I was crazy. His whole family blocked me and mutual friends turned their backs on me. I hope I never see him again as long as I live. He even had the new supply messaging me and told her I was stalking him. I never responded and blocked her. Wait until she finds out she’s next in line to go through what I went through. The worst thing that ever happened to me in my life. Glad he’s gone. Stay away from these monsters.. runnnnn and never look back. Everything that was said in this video is exactly the truth. I am relieved to know there’s people who can help and truly understand what these demons are capable of.
finally I exposed my narc husband in front of his most trusted people. Now that I know that love of my life is not going to come back he will definitely try to harm my 2 beautiful flowers. I am trying to be strong both emotionally and mentally 💪💪
That’s what our break up was over. I did something stupid out in public and he felt I ruined his image and he told me to get out he was done. I’m still in disbelief.
Narcissists have some of the most weirdest ways of sleeping .one of the most annoying I find is open mouth with head tilted all the way back on the pillow.
My narcissis, start talking ,snoring in extreme weird animals sound, turn exact side or move when I am moving, little slap arround my face or elbow arround my face while I am try to go deep sleep. Even when I try to go wash room, he wakes up and asks all good 😮 How come in his deep sleep he knows he was hurting and disturbing me😢
I love the grounded reality of this channel!!! Retirement took a toll on my finances, but with my involvement in the digital market, $27,000 weekly returns has been life changing. AWESOME GOD🌹🌹🌹🙏
After I raised up to 325k trading with her I bought a new House and a car here in the states 🇺🇸🇺🇸 also paid for my son's surgery (Oscar). Glory to God.shalom.
remember right before the lovebombing stage ends, they will typically feel a deep shame. Out of the blue they might tell you they're not worthy, they don't deserve you, or something of the sorts. That's their deep shame and feeling of being inadequate. When you hear that, you know devaluation is coming. Because that negative feeling they are feeling, they will project on you: suddenly they'll spike up the gaslighting, and the devaluation starts. They lose interest in you, and inevitably something/someone else catches their attention, maybe they start chatting online with a few others. But, again, their perfect delusional self that they hold on to, cannot be a cheater.. nonono. So their lenses distort reality and they start being extremely suspicious of you, and start accusing you out of the blue, in a manner stronger than normal ''light'' jealousy, and coming out of nowhere. It's not out of nowhere, they are like children. Like every negative feeling, they are projecting it onto you: they got interested in someone else, the relationship is cold: it has to be your fault, they can't be held accountable. You can be then sure 100% they are interested in someone else, that projected emotion is not random.
My eternal thanks for your enlightenment. He turned our own son against me and my parents who were always kind and good to him. I had to say goodbye to my son. Exceedingly painful. He's 34 and still gravitates to the narcissist. Not sure why. My son was the last thing he could take to hurt me. I still hope my son finds his way even if it's without me.
I personally don’t agree with that, mine deleted me, blocked me and didn’t talk to me for 3 years, not even in the slightest, I honestly thought it was the last time but then out of no where she adds me back on socials and starts talking again
The first time my brother introduced me to his fiancee she took a step back and looked at me like I was Satan himself. Never in my life did I get such a reaction from anybody. The rest of the night she refused to look at me or answer my questions. I knew then she was his flying monkey because my brother is a narcissist. Does anyone relate?
My husband and I were mentally and verbally abused by our evil narcissistic demon of an adult daughter, for years. It got so bad that the stress cause an emotional breakdown for my husband, One day he started crying uncontrollably with him gasping for air ( this is a guy that never cried because of his upbringing of men don't cry ) He was asking what he did wrong on raising her to be so evil then he collapsed and took his last breath 4 years and 7 months ago. She always had anger issues since she was a teen but we chopped it up as just being a teen and hormons since she seemed to be a very well rounded person overall. We noticed the changes in her as she got older and thought she was bipolar. But it was too late for us to get her help because she was over 18. She wouldn't amit that she has mental problems and get help. By the time I learned about narcissism, it was too late. The trauma damage was already done. In those horrible years of walking on eggshells she had us under her control because she was kicked out of her ex husband's home for stepping out on him and the trauma she caused. She ended back with us because she was homeless and 3 months pregnant with another's man child. So of course we took her in. She was lying from the start, telling us her marriage failed because he was abusing her physically. I know different now. We tried to help her, going through her pregnancy and the birth, then she couldn't handle being a mother. She wouldn't do what a mother should do and we ended up raising our grandson until he was 6 years old, She hunted down for a new supply because my husband became disabled and we couldn't give her a free ride anymore. She had to start paying her own way. That pissed her off and it really got bad. We ended up homeless with her stalking us and still messing with our heads. Then my husband died. She destroyed me beyond repair. I have been abandoned by everyone,... She made sure of that.. I went no contact but it is slowly killing me from the inside out. I can't have a relationship with my grandson. I can't function anymore. I'm the one that is at fault somehow. And you know what.. I'm starting to believe I must be. I'm just a failure and a lost cause.. I'm so tired of trying. I quit...
Don't give up. That's what they want. They want to kill you from the inside out. They are full of hate and jealousy and rage because you can love. Lean on God. He gives peace that surpasses all understanding. I'm praying for your peace and I'm sorry you have endured this abuse. It's not your fault.
Please know I am praying for you. Please get some counseling and support. Believe me I can relate. I am 67 and am grateful for you sharing this testimony to show others the magnitude of this evil.
These are pure facts. (My neighbors are still scared of me) I finally got away. He had his new supply and was insufferable and threatening. After I left, his source decided to go back to her kids Dad. No way to keep her from it. He completed self harm, and not one person came to 'take care' of him. I came back to Florida to do it. (Lost some friends) but he was my husband for 34 years, I at least could do that for him. He was in the coroners place 8 days by the time I got back, his family refused to help in any way.
Yes, my ex-husband was completely as you described; however, it was extremely severe because he had no one to replace me with. He caused me to lose my career, stole every penny from me, forged my name on so many money related documents that were unknown to me or my attorney until after the judge stamped the papers, he stalked me until I filed a police report, sabotaged my car, and so many other evil things, even eluding to the safety of my life. My life was hell for fifteen years, and it took three years to get the divorce finalized. And the behavior didn't stop there. It continued for a couple of more years. Penniless, I had to find a way to move away. In fact, one of my children does not want me to come visit him because if his father finds out I am anywhere in the vicinity, he is afraid for me. So he has to travel to come visit me instead.
Thank you for explaining it so well. It’s word by word exactly my life rn and it’s nothing I have ever experienced or imagined. I’m so confused and in my own head still trying to make sense of what to do and feel, like I don’t know how to move forward. The most basic life chores seem impossible like something is stopping me from doing them.
I literally feel like you are telling my story word for word. I feel that my heart has been tore out of my chest, like am going to die and he walks around happy as can be my children and I are hurting so much & he doesn't care at all
I'm so glad you're free of him though! And I know it's hard, but please just know that narcs can NEVER actually be happy. It's all an act. I know you probably know this, but it can't hurt to hear over and over! When I was dealing with my narc I kept questioning everything until it finally sunk in and clicked one day...and ever since that day, I haven't shed a single tear! Truly! I can look back and just shake my head, sometimes I can even laugh. Mostly I just feel bad for whoever they ended up marrying. (They seem like a really nice person...because narcs always choose a good supply, which means someone kind hearted and selfless. Too bad I am actually not quite as "nice" as I appear at first glance lol. Meaning I did NOT take crap for very long! (But can admit I took it too long...it took a close friend and my family convincing me that I wasn't crazy to finally cut them out of my life completely in one fell swoop!) But all that to say, I am SO sorry you're going through the tough emotions, as good as it is to be free of your narc. Keep telling yourself that the reason you feel like you're going to die is because you actually have a heart and a soul. This man does NOT! And he's in "actor" mode now trying to win over his new supply (if he hasn't already.) But a narc does not feel true joy, love or happiness. You can be assured their smiles are all hollow and are only for show. They may have a "fun" time for a month or two, but they never have "happy" times. What helped me was to just keep watching videos like this and listen to other people's stories so I felt less alone and less crazy. Eventually, like I said, I woke up one day and the grief was gone! It took a little while of course, but it WILL come for you too. Having kids makes it that much tougher, but just keep reminding them that nothing he does is their fault. If he doesn't have shared custody, it's also ok to gently start talking to them about narc abuse (if they're old enough to understand of course). And if they're too young, a good therapist or even school counselor can help them at least talk through some of their emotions in a specific way to encourage healing. Sending you healing vibes! Hang in there...surviving a narc is one thing I can assure you DOES get better. It won't be as painful as it is right now for very much longer now that you've discovered the truth behind what's really going on
I was recently love bombed like crazy then out of no where the one who promised me forever and all these luxury things and places we’ll see and go switched his feel off in the blink of an eye, It caused me to Stalk him, Self Harm, Lose out in work and ended up in a psych hospital, I could shake it he did me wrong but I was the one begging him back I couldn’t understand the coldness I wanted that love again I just called over 300 times in 3 weeks begging pleading crying I couldn’t sleep eat talk I isolated I wanted it back how could he hurt me then turn everything on me? Was it my fault? I should’ve just keep my mouth shut,, I went into a down world spiral that even God couldn’t get me out, But I’m here today even though a big pet of me is dying for that validation that I wasn’t crazy and that apology I know I deserved I’m here to rebuild myself I have a long way to go but I’m here I don’t know how this will happen but I’m going to try
UPDATE I no longer care lol and in my healing stage not just from him but from all men, I’m felling extremely hopeful and spiritually, There are times where I revert back to a hurt place but immediately overcome it with prayer and prayer only, I’m not in no contact I’m in we’ll never speak again contact and we’ll never meet again contact lol Stay blessed guys
„Legally, you can’t take action. „ The legal system has to change. I talked to a lawyer, and he said he couldn’t do anything, even though the impact was high. I could not accept a better-paying position in time as I developed depression. If he had stolen money from me, it would have been a different story. In the end, I was told that I would find a new man soon, which I found insulting.“
They need to be held accountable for what they do. They think since they don't leave bruises that you can't do anything. Get proof start making them be held accountable.
Great episode. It’s definitely tough fighting them in court this one I had manipulated the judge I saw the bailiff nodding her head in sympathy for him. This is crazy he did everything up to the date to destroy me and judge barely gave me anything. He laughed at the judge when she said if he continues to be disrespectful she’d put him in jail. After the second time she said it he knew she was giving empty threats. He saw she wasn’t gonna do nothing so he kept up his antics. Unbelievable what they get away with. He really turned on his satanic behavior and I watched all of these people feel sorry for him. There were young adults in there he didn’t appear to be able to fool them not sure why maybe you can add an episode about the younger people who can’t be fooled.
A narcissist and his girlfriend just made my life hell, I wish I knew how to deal with these demons back then. Thanks for raising awareness about these kind of people
I'm not sure if the final discard has happened from his point of view. I thought it had, but he's tried to contact me recently. But I do know that I reached a stage where I knew I was done. Completely done. I now feel immune to his nonsense. It came at such a high price and I've got so much work to do on myself, but I'm at a good starting point. Thank you, Danish
There's no such thing as final discard by a narcissist -- WE decide we're done, everyone. These jackals come back again and again and again, trying their lame hoovers at unexpected times. It is NOT up to THEM. It's up to US. CHOOSE YOURSELF. No one needs a narc in their life.
He had a countdown for me, once the kids were old enough he said he would be "done" with me. I have been discarded almost our whole relationship. His cheating and humiliation of me was my downfall because I loved him. He gets mad and kicks me out. I can't remember a time when I was'nt a disappointment to him.
Damn! Everything you said happened to me. My final discard was because I know to damn much about him and he decided to give me the final discard because I was on to his fooliness. It’s been 1 yr and 5 months, he’ll tap in once in a while as a unknown caller to play games on my phone. 😂
This was highly informative. I façed the exact things in the whole course of last year, and was confused what's happening and how to overcome. U have great clarity
ex nard told me to leave, i filed for divorce, he illegally evicted me and our son, we moved out, he knocks on my door, giving gifts, our eviction records end in august, we are going to move away asap.
im about to lose my mind.... i went back with her after a 6 month break, it lastet for 2 days and endet so fucking bad...... like i just dont understand her behavior.... im so done with life...... im tired.... guess schizophrenia + Narcissm = run away
I am unsure if my bf has another supply. He just asked for space because he is grieving. Everytime I ask him if he's with someone else so I can leave him and let her have him. He said there's no one and I'm just a paranoid wreck.
Sometimes they still want you back after the final discard. My mom let me be homeless, but now she still wants me back so she doesn’t have to keep arguing with my “golden child” brother. So yeah, they still want you back, or else they will start to destroy each other.
My mom's resources have always meant more to me than her love. It's cycles of abandonment gift bombs. Bringing me to rage. Love is understanding and she has none
What you say about narcissists is so true. Its a shame they dont want help for a mental illness which predisposes them to do drugs, alcohol abuse, to stealing, jail, and prison. Our prisons and jails are all full of ppl with NPD. Five years or more of psychotherapy and desire to not be controlled by NPD can help them. The disorder can be controlled.
Betrayal Trauma After Narcissistic Abuse:
www.emotionalabuserecovery.com/livevent
Az chu chalan mea seeth yi... Final discard😒
If you live with a narcissist long enough do you become one? I see this in my female relatives that have lived with one for 50 years. She became a bully, and hateful.
Narcissists move VERY fast in relationships. It's not uncommon to hear, “I love you", and/or be bombarded with love songs/texts/memes a few weeks after meeting them. By rushing into sex/intimacy, they fast-forward the relationship. They get their targets to fall for them before he/she can realize something is amiss. I believe this is also the reason they tend to be VERY good lovers. Sex is usually the “hook” in toxic relationships. Narcissists lack genuine personalities. So, they mirror their targets. If you find you have “so much in common" with a new person, your likes are their likes, and your dislikes are coincidentally their dislikes as well, raise your antennas! They may be mirroring you. This is the “soulmates" hook… You'll also notice that they'll spend more time telling you who they are, verses showing you. As time goes on, you'll notice the words they used to describe themselves do not fit their personality - at all. But, they will fit YOURS!!! Passive-aggressive behavior and irrational/unexplained anger, are also major red flags. Pay attention to how a person treats you the first time you say, “No”, and/or when things don't go their way… If they give you the silent treatment, grow cold, and/or pull away, do not overlook it! Most importantly, if someone pulls away, or goes silent, after you set a boundary - DO NOT pursue them! This is how they groom you to be the chaser in the relationship. It's emotional abuse/manipulation! Pay close attention to people who portray themselves as victims.
NOTHING is EVER their fault! EVERYONE, including the family pet, has done them wrong… ALL of their ex's are “crazy” and mistreated them… They’re great, but no one appreciates said greatness… Simply put, it's bullshit! No one should have a laundry list of bad experiences. If they do, RUN, because they're the common denominator! Narcissists tend to have a history of failed/short-term relationships. Believe it or not, it's hard for Narcissists to find people to deal with them long term due to their instability and poor behavior… Superficial relationships/friendships. I've noticed they don't have anyone they're genuinely close to. This is due to their inability to bond and form true attachments to people. Their relationships are shallow and based on surface-level bs. They'll refer to someone as their bestfriend, but you’ll notice they barely speak. Or, that the person is never really around. Or, only shows up when it's time to party, etc. They may also speak down on/poorly of said “bestfriend” behind their back. Narcissists tend to be condescending, two-faced and downright mean! Based on my experience, they cannot talk about deep subjects (i.e. fears/emotions). Or, how a situation truly made them feel. Or, what their childhood was like in detail… They don't want to go there. I suspect, it's because they can't. They don't know themselves well enough. They can't connect. They also live in a world of dishonesty. They're very dishonest with themselves about who they truly are. A poor relationship with their Mother/primary caregiver. Underlying issues between Narcissists and their Mother's (abuse, neglect, don’t get along, etc.), seems to be common. People that I've known who've displayed strong Narcissistic tendencies, ALL had bad relationships with their Mothers! I think it's worth mentioning, their Mother's also displayed strong Narcissistic traits… I'm fully aware and understand that there are healthy adults who have toxic Mother's.
However, if you're spotting several red flags in an individual, including this one, pay closer attention! They're selfish! Some are selfish from the very beginning. Some start out generous and slowly begin withholding. Some act helpless and needy. They manipulate people into doing things for them, but never give back. It's not only financial and material selfishness. They're selfish emotionally, affectionately, conversationally. sexually and with their attention. They withhold validation and support. EVERYTHING has to be about them, their needs, their wants and everything happens on their terms. Anger, rage, silent treatments and disappearing acts are common - when they don't get their way. Pathological lying. Narcissists are professional liars. It's their second nature. If you call them out, they'll have no issue staring deeply into your eyes as they tell another lie! You'll hardly ever get the truth. Even with unchallengeable proof of the truth, they'll hold on to the lie. It's actually quite fascinating to see them in action - once you know what you’re dealing with. They also have the uncanny ability to provoke doubt in their victims (even when you KNOW the truth), because their lies are so convincing! Beware of people who do not seek conflict resolution. Many Narcissists enjoy drama/chaos! Remember, these are high-conflict personalities. Many of them NEED to argue and fight! Peace to a narcissist, is what chaos is to non-disordered people - unsettling. This is why they repeat behaviors that trigger a negative response. They need tension, anger and high/out of control emotions. They're known for calling people crazy, drama queens, insecure, etc., but never admit what they did to provoke those responses. And, when you attempt to discuss/resolve something, THEY said/did, they’ll gaslight, stonewall and/or flip it back on to you.
They're extremely disrespectful, rude and lack self-awareness. They have an issue with being called out on their behavior and project/deflect to avoid accountability. “Normal” people want to get along, for the most part. So, they seek fair compromises when conflict arises. Narcissists want to “win” and conflict IS their niche. This is how many Narcissists get their way - they wear people down via conflict. Immaturity. It’s one thing to be playful and lighthearted (in appropriate settings), as an adult. It’s something completely different to be immature. Narcissists suffer from arrested development. They do not know how to respond to situations/people/stress/life appropriately. They have a child-like mindset. They truly believe everything is about them and have no concept of the needs of others. By nature, children are takers. They have no concept of reciprocation. They believe their Parents (and everyone else), exists to meet their needs. When their needs aren’t met, or they don’t get what they want, they become mean and throw tantrums. Narcissists cannot think outside of themselves and their wants/needs - like children. They’re completely unaware that people are individuals with their own agency, needs, wants, opinions... They truly believe people exist to serve them. They believe their job is to receive. They’re children trapped in adult bodies, who cannot consider anything/anyone other than themselves! Above everything I've stated, trust your intuition! Narcissists give off an uneasy vibe. They try very hard to appear cool, calm and collected - on the surface. But, you can feel their energy. It's very off-putting. They also tend to have more noticeable negative qualities, than most people. But, you have to stop justifying and making excuses, in order to see things clearly. Accept people for who they are and not who you want them to be. Observe, listen and trust yourself. No one should be allowed to grant themselves a position in your life. Vet people and YOU decide if they'll be a liability, or an asset, to you. Lastly, take cues from your body. If you ever feel your mood changing, feel anxious or feel your stomach knot up, in the company of someone, don't dismiss it! It could be a sign that you're in bad company!!! Additionally, If you need to find out about a cheating narcissist; send a request to: MetaspyHub@gmail. com
Well said. I’d like to add contempt as an early red flag. It’s when the love bombing phase is over and the de valuation phase begins.
I wasted 3 years with this man thinking he could change but he only got worse!! The very first paragraph through to the last is 100% accurate in my experience 😔
WOW! Well said!
💯 agreed my x narc husband did three marriages in 10 years and in presence of 1st wife now he is with his frst wife and 3rd whi is secreetly married with him from 1year and some month if dating now disclose his 3rd marriage after 1 year
Thank you for this information. I’m struggling a lot after being unfairly discarded by the woman I love. I know I should just move on, but I’m drowning in heartache. Are you able to speak about my situation? Thank you very much.
We dont need them back. They can go to space and stay forever for all we care. Demons in human form
Facts
Absolutely 🎉🎉🎉😂❤
AGREED! They can go to space and stay foreger! My ex husband tried SO HARD to get me to say that I wanted a divorce, and I kind of knew what he was doing, so I NEVER SAID IT. I would always say, "No, I don't want a divorce, I just want you to stop lying." Or , "No, I don't want a divorce, I just want you to stop staring at porn 8 hours a day." Or whatever. I knew he wanted me to say it so he could blame everything on me. At least I was wise enough not to do that. He is gone and I am still alive.
Yesssssss
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂...funny..lol lol
They may discard us but they will always remain a narcissist
Hahaha!! Yes Indeed!
They don't care about it.
That’s what got me through my breakup with the narcissist. I left him, but I still thought about him all the time. I found out he married another woman and I thought, good, he’s someone else’s problem now, not mine. I didn’t need that narcissistic abuse back in my life. But I did feel sorry for her.
@kgs2280 but you literally sound like the narcissistic one here... It sounds like he moved on with his life and is loved and happy while you are bitter and alone, stuck being your own problem...
@@MrGodgivemeaname You couldn’t be more wrong. A few months after I left him, I met a wonderful man who showed me what love really looks like, and we were married some months after that. I don’t know how soon the old boyfriend got married, but I only heard about it a few years later. I was long over him by that time.
They won't come back if you don't let them back
Block them.
Chile you didn’t have a narcissist then you probably just weren’t compatible and forcing it cus they will find any way!
I told my husband to not come back he still keeps coming back to me after I done blocked him.
I agree 💯 percent ❤❤❤❤
The only final discard happens when you realize the narc is not worth it- not your love, your time, your effort. When you finally decide to go no contact and disappear from the narc’s life.
ThatsRight 💯🎯
Exactly right
Absolutely 💯.
When they no longer have a need/use of you, they will smear and discard you. They are always looking for new supply.
Narcissists are driven by demonic spirits. Let them face God Almighty bec his justice is perfect, beyond human comprehension.
Recovering from a narcissists betrayal is slow at best, one day at a time. First you have to recognize it: understand that the issue, the problem does not lie within you. We all do and say things in relationships that we wish we hadn't, that we can't take back…however it is in recognizing this that steps can be taken to correct and become better in our interactions with others. Narcissists cannot do this, it's always someone else's fault, they cannot genuinely look at themselves and see the need for improvement. The pain they inflict is very real and very hurtful. Being betrayed isn't a fault of the one being betrayed, but the cause of the betrayer. Loving someone that betrays you hurts…loving someone that has no empathy for the pain they've caused is maddening. Once you recognize it, can see it for what it is then is time to move on to acceptance.
Accepting the fact that another person, a narcissist, has no empathy for your pain, the pain they've caused, isn't easy. Accepting the fact they just don't have the level of care, love, self awareness is a must though. Understanding and accepting that this relationship will never be what you had envisioned is key to recovering. A narcissist just isn't capable of having a relationship on that level, they are simply not capable to work through the many ups and downs, the kinks, of a relationship. Maybe their fault, maybe not but the facts are still the same..the end result is still the same. It's highly doubtful that you'd ever get a narcissist to see where they are wrong, to see the pain they've caused, what they see and what they look at is themselves, all else is really a mute point for them. So, in my opinion, trying to get them to see, to understand, the pain inflicted only hinders the recovery process.
Finally when recognizing and acceptance have taken place, one needs to find a place within them where they can forgive. Forgiveness comes from love, and it's really more for the injured party than the narcissist themselves. Forgiveness facilitates healing. Hatred and anger only breeds bitterness within a person. Take what you can from a relationship with a narcissist, take peace, love for others and leave the narcissist and bitterness behind. Take comfort in knowing you do have value as a human being, your value does not come from others, especially a narcissist who can only really see themselves. Such a sad way to exist really when you think about. Satisfaction from within a relationship is a mutual thing, the give and take on both sides, the narcissist will never know that great satisfaction of a true, committed relationship. (Commitment to to see it through and make personal improvements)
Additionally, If you suspect cheating or other forms of manipulation and need to gather evidence for your own peace of mind, you may consider reaching out for assistance. For more information, you can contact: Barryinvestigation@gmail. com.
There should be courses on NPD taught in school and on public television.
Prob is that teachers are narcissists more often than the average Joe...Same in politics, everywhere, where you can flex with your power.... I'm for strong parents. Kids learn some cr00ked stuff in schools, nowadays.
The problem with this idea is that it is a rampant phenomena and wouldn't. be politically accepted in any system. Just look at the average psychologist,domestic abuse advocate,until probably recently,the depth, acknowledgement and scope of this remains obscured.
@@entity0xyep. Same thing happened some years back with bi-polar disorder I think it was. The amount of people throwing around the term gaslighting without knowing its meaning is ridiculous. The moment you dont see eye to eye now a days its because you’re a narcissist. Truly awful how quickly humans destroyed its meaning.
That would never happen as the NPD's and psychopaths comprise the politicians, school policy makers and curriculum designers.
Yes and the courts are not ready to realise emotional abuse on children either 😡
Emotional abuse is the hardest to get over too. I have survived sexual, verbal, and emotional abuse. This is by far has been the hardest.
Because if they recognise it there won't be jobs left for the judges. It's all part of the system.
Children are 3rd class citizens. Even prisoners got more rights than them
Yes! This is so so painful.
Emotional abuse is very difficult yo prove 🤷🏾♀️
My ex bf stood me up on my birthday, after that, I was done, no more. He was accusing me of being with other guys, going out and drinking, which I was not doing, I didn’t beg or cry like I had before, I said, “ok, it’s fine, I understand” and didn’t give him a chance to respond, I blocked him. He came to my house about a week later, I didn’t answer the door of course. I was done with the disrespect. That was about 9 months ago. Stay strong guys! We got this. ❤
They never change don't look back the worst thing you did was show him that he hurted you that made him feel real good inside.my ex boyfriend is now my Covert Narcissists husband and guess what he got worser they never change. Save yourself find someone else better who treats you right.
@@relaxdrinkeatandlaughwithc5274 you should take your own advice. 😉
@@EricaChavira-on4ozNo shit that's why the hell. I said don't look back move on.I don't want you to make the mistake I made.😢 women to women. RUN 🏃♂️ 🏃♀️
Thank Danish, is it me or is it a thing.... after 22 yrs I told my husband I'm done. No he spends all his time with our middle child & HIS friends. He has 4 children but chooses to spend his time with ONLY ONE child. Is it me or do all narcs have NO TRUE friends of his own age. I know he's doing it just for supply, feeling like big man in front of 20 yr olds..... he's 47
@@leahsandow9300 As far as i know they don't have true friends or if they have some they wear their mask on while with their friends
I dealt with a narcissist. I ghosted them. I value my own life more than that. Thank you ❤
True. Indifference is the outcome of healing. You know when it’s over when you become indifferent to the narcisist and anything they do or say. They become someone you used to know.
Mine is completely gone forever. He died 2 years ago. He cannot come back.
Congratulations
How does that make you feel? I am genuinely curious.
😂
U even bother to say,if he hv died😂
Same here haha! Honestly I was relieved but felt a little guilty for feeling so relieved 😂
If someone leaves you or tells you to leave in a relationship, respect their wishes and leave.✌
Pairs well with "When a person shows you who they are, you should believe them."
Every single one of them have the same mind ! Disturbing . I’d give anything to be able to go back and walk right past this monster at 17 years old. 22 years later here I am in the remains of what a covert narcissist has left behind .
Do your best never to get near and look at the narc again...let the narc be
I am 67 and have not awakened to the truth until the last 2 years. I also should have left when I was a teenager but my mind was damaged by trauma bonds. No matter what age the light bulb goes on, at one point we must leave. Staying in these relationships is too damaging. Walk away, let them go!! Who cares what people think? God knows the truth and one day they will have to face Him! Love yourself!
And I bet you will remain as far as you're still trying to meet someone you're not anymore.
Please.consider: if you were 17 again, you would have done the same one time and another.
You don't have to go back in time to rescue from your past. You have to get over it. Life is not going to give you a 2nd chance unless you start telling yourself: "Yes, it's true. I met a monster and I survived. Now I'm starting over knowing that I will be fine and do better next time. I'm not done".
Then, life starts again. ❤
emijean8391 Yes, I was married to a narc for 9 years. I am glad that I am alive. I hope that you find a healing path and keep loving yourself. Don't give up no matter what! It will take time, but it can get better. Just try to forget about all the nasty stuff and when you notice yourself thinking about it, do something for yourself, or something you find fun, or call someone for support. Love yourself! ❤
It is like coming out of a horror movie... I know. Hugs.
They may discard you without letting you know, always keeping the door open. They'll come back at the slightest hint of an opportunity..
@@therealaayan it's so cowardly
I publicly exposed my ex when I did a reality show. He was so embarrassed and mad. Best decision ever bc my truth set me free and let him know I wasn't dealing with his shhhh anymore. He never hoovered me again! 🙏🏽✨️
@tinaleigh3273 you literally did the narcissistic thing this dude in the video describe narcissists of doing. You ran a smear campaign against your ex because you are a narcissist.
@@MrGodgivemeaname sometimes you have to play their game to get rid of them evil mfs so no not necessarily it doesn’t make them one. They go through great lengths to fck with you mentally, emotionally and physically so I say all this to say if they got rid of the narc completely by doing that, then kudos to them. Trust they caused harmed to them 10X worse.
Yess! u go girl but idk, i've heard some of these people who give advice on narcs, that they actually like it when you do that to them, like they just like any negative/positive thing, but idk. hopefully he got what he DESERVED!
Anyone that doesn’t want to be exposed shouldn’t have done the bad behavior to begin with
@thethe4665 you have people here justifying fighting narcissistic behavior with narcissistic behavior. At what point does the narcissistic abuse end? At what point is it not hypocritical? At what point is the cycle broken? At what point do people reflect on their own tendencies and rise above this? At what point is there a path for redemption and a better world?
Mine just started actIng funny again. Not communicating, not asking me to come over as much, claiming to be working more, just missing in acton basically. I know it's someone else but I still miss him. 🥺Dear God, please remove this man from my life COMPLETELY!
The demon finally gave up after calling me 65 times with no response
Oh you've patience counting so high, prob same amount with me and older overt coke head sis, I'm very satisfied with not being pushed to change my number, they inconvenience me enough!😊
they are on a Break. taking some energy drink. (new supply) . they be back and ruin your day if you allow them . close the door completely
@@TataShiku He's blocked, but you can still see he calls, not changing my number
@@joseenoel8093 Right, me either
😮😮😮
In my experience & research narcs are never really gone. They always linger in the background & many do try to come back & see if you are still open to their bs. It's common 4 narcs to keep their exes around if possible
They always lose. They're losers. God never lets them get away with their games. I have witnessed them wither away like weeds. They destroy themselves.
they pass on at 90+ years old from natural causes after destroying peoples lives for decades ya real justice there.
I decided to not take revenge on my horrible ex and this is exactly what happened to her. What she did was atrocious, and wow did the Lord punish her big-time because I stayed out of the bad energy circle. This definitely opened my eyes.
I've only endured this for 3 years and I've experienced all the emotional abuse you mentioned. I can't imagine people that have been in it for decades. I can't imagine your mind
It's very terrible very hard
Don't ever relax that the final discard is over. If they are alive, they will hoover, when their need arises.
So true. The hoover can come years later. Never let down your guard.
Please help me with a problem now. I left this guy. But his wife contacting me. What to do?
@@jesus_is_life_love2932 stay very calm. Don't give out your info. Let her tell whatever she wants to tell. Don't reply, don't clarify. Take a lot of time to think. Tell her that you are not ready to discuss anything at this point in your life. Just be happy that she took the garbage out of your life. If it feels like she is suffering, understand that it's not your responsibility to save her. She has to do her own thinking, and take her own decisions.
This is very true. I divorced my ex wife in 2013 and she just tried to contact me in March. And it's 2024.
Yup.
I have grown up in a conventional family with four brothers, being the only daughter and the youngest. Yes, we had out internal family feuds, sibling rivalry and all that, but all that never affected me much because I was able to function as a normal person, work, party and enjoy myself, had great friends, everything was fine. Nothing killed my spirit, any incident. But when I met him, and married him, I didint realise until now that I am good for nothing. I lost myself, I dont know if I will ever be able to rise back up. Yes there was physical abuse of the worst kind everytime I called him out on his behaviour, but somehow what has impacted me is the mental and emotional abuse. I just cant believe how I allowed that to happen, why did I ? I wish I could erase the last 7 years of my life. Forget about finding supplies after the separation, he had them while he was with me. Those blatant lies, that shrewd sense of confidence, the arrogance. its all demonic.
please never give up on your healing journey, you will come through
i was married to one for 40years and 7years post divorce he is still smearing me
for 5years i have worked on myself so i am healed so i don"t care about the weasel"s smear campaigns
you will make it blessings
You are like a Blessing to those who is suffering suffered from narcissist
I was in a web of absolute lies, deception and illusions. The covert narcissist had planned his discard meticulously ahead of time. One by one, his masks began to fall. He became vile and hateful towards me for no reason. He looked at me like he loathed me, was jealous and vindictive. Like I was his arch enemy. One by one, people we knew in common began to rapidly turn on me. All of this happened in the exact same timeline. The common friends were his flying monkeys who he had secretly convinced to betray me with his false smearing. I witnessed the shocking chain of events and understood this was no coincidence. I felt it in my gut even though I couldn’t understand it. The discomfort became so colossal that I ended up blocking this narcissist and every single person associated with him and supporting him in their hate against me. I did this for protection and self preservation and to heal. I have purged false people from my life and now developed a radar for narcs. I’m grateful for the lessons but would never want anyone to experience the abuse I did with various narcs in my life. Thanks Danish.
@@MauveBlossom It’s like you summarized my story word for word. Sometimes, it’s hard to even begin to tell it and the only way I can describe what I experienced is “it was like a lifetime movie”. The discard from a covert narcissist is nothing short of absolutely brutal. It’s been a couple years since the discard for me and I’m getting to a place of indifference I guess you can say. I had no choice but to walk away from all connections to the past as it was going to be the demise of me if not. The false narratives, the smear campaign, character assassination, it was all too much. Just wanted to say I send hugs and love your way in your healing journey. I know all too well 🤍.
@@emijean8391 Hugs and healing energies to you, friend of the Light. I am glad to hear you overcame and freed yourself. The hardest part is now over. Stay focused on healing and evolving from this experience. Transmute the pain into superpowers and strengths. Nourish your mind, body, soul and work towards honing your higher self. Your empathy is a treasure, and I know you will honour it for that. You are whole, complete and enough. You are worthy of giving and receiving the purest love, respect and compassion. Love yourself. The universe supports you. Together, we will all heal and ascend.
Same here..wish u strength
@@kayesmith2518 thank you. Choose yourself, together we will heal and rise ⭐️
Life only gets better without them around❤ heal and try to forgive yourself for putting yourself last.
My ex always said 'gotta leave your options open'. I quickly learned what that meant.t That's why he never cut ties with anyone, his boss, coworkers, his hook ups, his family, but talked horribly about them all behind their back.
I’ve never felt this kind of pain before.
I had the reverse discard. After i started divorce my Ex-Husband married before me. It was impossible to stay any longer in this house, now i am the monster, my own children and the complete relatives are my enemies. Very painful experiance in my life, no contact to 5 children and 12 grandchildren. But Jesus Christ helped me, so i can live a good life now. The narcisst is leaded through demons and they are pure evil. I forgive them and trust in god. Thank you for this very good explanation.
My ex's favourite quote was "the hardest thing in the world is the coldness of indifference". I used to ask him there are uncountable words that have been said and you chose these cold words? This quote is chilling. When he discarded, betrayal trauma was so severe that I had to walk around clutching myself to keep my heart from bursting out. And I didn't had closure. Then when I learned about narcissism, then finally the pieces of puzzle fell together suddenly and I could finally see the truth and was able to make peace with myself.
There is no final discard by the narcissist. Only final when the victim says no more goes no contact.
yes especialy when u were the best supply
Good thing my ex could not do that with MY FAMILY AND TRUE FRIENDS! He may have convinced HIS family, friends, and enablers that I was the evil one....Good thing I don't need anyone close to him in MY life! 🙌🏾
This is my story, I made sure I cut communication with his family members.
People already know him for whom he truly is.😢
Glad your family and friends are able to see it! My sister just went through this but luckily I know all about narcs due to an old friend who stalked me and emotionally abused me. His family have all taken his side despite him being addicted to coke and having multiple DUIs to the point where he can't drive without a breathalyzer. Yet he still borrows other people's cars (including my sister's) so he can drive drunk. Yet he's convinced his family that my sister is a "crazy alcoholic" who has "emotional outbursts" because she was crying and screaming during one of their last fights. She had finally had enough and started sticking up for herself, and he used it to his advantage. When she claimed he hit her, he was able to convince everyone that it was an accident because she was "freaking out and crying" and "super drunk." Nevermind he was high on God knows what and also inebriated. And nevermind that she only started drinking when he came into her life. She was a shell of her old self up until this past month after finally ending things!
He'd already started his smear campaign, fortunately, (i say fortunately since that means it's OVER for good!) but thankfully all of my sister's friends and of course our family are there for her because we understand what was going on. She was sad to lose everyone in his family because they're very nice people, but better to lose them than the people who really matter! So many narc victims are left completely alone in the end. Their own friends and family are fooled by the narc, and it breaks my heart to think about it. Glad both of you have good people in your life it sounds, and congrats on being free from the narc!!!
Happened to me in the worse way while pregnant. Absolutely awful
Same they calling me all types of B’s I’m sure but i never none of them & idc!
I hope there is a justice system in place for narcissistic people. It's damaging your mental health when you are in this relationship. These people have no empathy or sympathy that they do anything to break you into pieces. I hope and pray that people who have been through this situation will get out of it because it's never easy to get out of a narcissist after being trauma bonded. Have faith and pray because this experience will teach you to be strong, resilient, and have faith in order to get out of it and be free. ❤
Yippee it’s a party when they leave for good 🥰☮️⚖️
Just happened to me in last couple of days.When i got to know that she is a covert Narcissist, i said all the truth about her on her face and at that time she was cheated on me for several time with another guy . As always she ready her next supply by manipulating him and finally discard me bcz she can't tolerate the truth about her and i just unwear her fake mask
Even when you never speak to them and never let them see you, they will hate you and wish you the worst forever
Mine would purposely pick a fight and then tell me I needed to go visit my family/parents, send me off with the kids for two to three weeks. And then bring me home. He would do this every three to four months.
When I started understanding some of this behavior, I'd refuse to participate in his manipulation. I'd ask him why he wanted to fight/argue with me. And I'd tell him I refused to argue. That would only infuriate him more. He'd explode and demand I leave immediately. So no matter what he would discard and bring me back. But to the outside world it looked like I was the one leaving and crawling back.
Dealt him a narcissistic injury by telling him I was seeing someone else.
Smart you, I torture mine by 'not' having an affair, he may as well be stuck with me too! ❤
Gaslight the gaslighter? Fair play in my book.
yes !! good job. but now work on the inside. and cleanse sleff off their energy. otherwise when you get away from them, you will meet them in a different body
Love it!!!❤
I actually am seeing someone else.
You are so good at explaining narcissism with much more depth than most other narcissism experts here on RUclips
I feel so sorry for their new supply victims.
Danish, I just want to say thank you for your videos, they have opened my eyes and helped me place boundaries and start healing from my ex properly. On behalf of everyone healing from narcissistic abuse syndrome, thank you.
When will I be so lucky? Discard me. No more stalking.
Eventually they will, they’ll find a new guy or girl to chase and terrorize, then, the narc won’t even remember your name.
@@EricaChavira-on4oz I can't wait.......the sooner the better.
@@SarahEvans-e3gsame. That’s exactly what I’m going through now. He stalks me makes me think he will beat me up if I test him. I think I’m his ultimate supply berceuse I’m a huge empath it’s fkn annoying.
If you decide to block and kick them out they will leave
@@jesus_is_life_love2932 You'd think so. They just can't get over me. The lengths they are willing to go for my attention. It's sad.
Shocker, they are done with u once they took everything
Danish I swear you were a fly on my wall. So on point with the reverse discard, he abused me that if I were to recount someone will think I’m making it up. It was wild! And of course he already had a new supply who he married 5 months after divorce but plays victim. My kids and I were discarded like shit but we are healing and thriving day by day . Thanks Danish for making me realize I AM NOT CRAZY!
I did have that feeling inside that it was truly over.
Me also after 7.5 years of separation. He’s come into some $$$ and already gradually pre discarding hopefully he serves me divorce papers. I been ready to sign those papers
Unfortunately, infidelity tends to go hand in hand with narcissism. Especially, somatic narcissism. Narcissists believe EVERYTHING they need is external, including self-worth, self-esteem, validation, etc. Those things are what make up our inner world and we are supposed to develop and cultivate them within/on our own. Narcissists DEPEND on people to supply those things for them. Because we cannot (nor, are we supposed to) supply every want/need of a partner, narcissists are always on the lookout for "better supply". They will always gravitate toward anyone they feel can meet the needs/wants their spouse isn't (and can't). Narcissists are unstable and they cannot soothe themselves. They cannot meet their own needs and their needs/wants are constantly changing. Narcissists are black holes. They are human abyss' of unmet needs/wants. Even if you gave them everything, they'd still want MORE... All while giving NOTHING in return. Narcissists are also pathologically bored. They do not experience boredom the way normal adults do. They're like children. Once they become bored, they tend to throw their toys (people) in a corner to collect dust. Then, they search for new ones... Untilllll, they realize that their newest toy isn't as fun. Or, it doesn't function as well as the old toy did. Then, they'll go digging in the corner to find that old toy (the reason their relationships tend to be off and on). People are objects meant to keep them occupied and entertained. The newer the toy, the better/more exciting it is. However, EVERYONE will inevitably lose their shine with the narcissist. You must accept their reality and realize that it's NOT ABOUT YOU and it never was. This is also the point when it becomes crucial to sit your ego on the curb. Your ego will want to fight to be seen. Your ego will want to fight to prove you're enough. Your ego will feel it's "worthy" of the narcissist and fight to "keep" them... But, again: IT'S NOT ABOUT YOU. Most narcissists are extremely irresponsible. Many of them marry to secure stability. Or, to have someone they can count on to help with bills to free up their resources. It also ensures they'll have somewhere safe to land when they fall - because they always f*** up... Do yourself a favor and pull that rug of security out from under them and save YOURSELF. Narcissists do not have a moral compass. They do not respect the union of marriage. It'll always be a one-sided arrangement with you being the giver that's making their life easier and them being the taker that's making your life harder. We deserve the same love, attention, support and understanding that we give our spouses. You will never get it from someone suffering with NPD. Moreover, if you feel sure that your husband might never cheat on you, you might have to rethink. Most wives in marriages are shocked when they find out their husband cheating, and it happens more with people who never thought they would cheat. This is why you have to take the tiniest suspicion carefully. If your husband is cheating on you, the best and probably the only guaranteed way to catch him is to spy on their phones. However, spying on a phone is not something you can do without any external help unless you have the James bond level of spy skills. In such case you will need an expert phone spyier Metaspyhub@gmail. com for the purpose,,,
BINGO!!!!! ON
EVERY WORD!!! Thank you Ms Katherine!! You can't get a better explanation....my experience(s) 1000%
👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏
@MrGodgivemeaname doesn't sound like they need it, they've used their heart and brain to analyze and help themself. You, however? Need more than help.
@pinkyalmeroth3702 unlike you I actually have seen professionals in therapy and worked through my issues and traumas. It sounds pretty narcissistic thinking that all a person would need is confirmation from their own feelings and thoughts to work through things instead of breaking away from their narcissistic perceptions of things by actually talking to others and gaining more outside perspective on things. I find this channel is littered with covert narcissists in the comment section selectively cherry picking the parts they want to hear instead of actually doing self reflection on how this all applies to them because everyone on earth shares some narcissistic traits. You need professionals though to actually diagnose someone with narcissistic personality disorder, they can't just be an ex who you are obviously still mad at. This is literally what a covert narcissist would do by laying blame instead of actually doing any self reflection.
@MrGodgivemeaname
And assuming someone hasn't gotten help isn't narcissistic? And for some, yes, confirmation and experience are our diagnoses. When you've been raised by narcs, have dealt with them your entire life, and been in countless relationships with them, you will know what you're dealing with at some point and all a professional is good at and getting paid for, is to listen and help you navigate the process of breaking the trauma bond and moving on with your life and thriving. You gotta do the work. No one can do that for you. And yes, almost every video on this thread about narcs is flooded with narcs in the comment sections. I've said that many times!!! They love to debate, challenge, and word salad conversations, thriving from the attention, negative or positive, much like you have done with everyone in this section. As much as people want to believe everyone is acting from a place of narcissism to justify their own behaviors, that's just not completely true. If you're not here to encourage, support, or just give positive feedback to those of us who have and still are dealing with abuse, then go to the narcissistic side of youtube and vent there and victim blame, cuz we don't need that kind of foolishness over here.
@@MrGodgivemeaname
And assuming someone hasn't gotten help isn't narcissistic? And for some, yes, confirmation and experience are our diagnoses. When you've been raised by narcs, have dealt with them your entire life, and been in countless relationships with them, you will know what you're dealing with at some point and all a professional is good and getting paid for, is to listen and help you navigate the process of breaking the trauma bond and moving on either your life. You gotta do the work. No one can do that for you. And yes, almost every video on this thread about narcs is flooded with narcs in the comment sections. I've said that many times!!! They love to debate, challenge, and word salad conversations, thriving from the attention, negative or positive, much like you have done with everyone in this section. As much as people want to believe everyone is acting from a place of narcissism to justify their own behaviors, that's just not completely true. If you're not here to encourage, support, or just give positive feedback to those of us who have and still are dealing with abuse, then go to the narcissistic side of youtube and vent there and victim blame, cuz we don't need that kind of foolishness over here..
Interesting video, My relationship of 5 years ended a month ago. The love of my life decided to leave me, I really love her so much I can’t stop thinking about her, I’ve tried my very best to get her back in my life, but to no avail, I’m frustrated, I don’t see my life with anyone else. I’ve done my best to get rid of the thoughts of her, but I can’t, I don’t know why I’m saying this here, I really miss her and just can’t stop thinking about her..
its difficult to let go of someone you love, i was in a similar situation, my relationship of 12 years ended, but i couldnt just let her go i did all i could to get her back, i had to seek the help of a spiritual counselor who helped me bring her back
Amazing, how did you get a spiritual counselor, and how do i reach her?
Her name is Shelly renee white , and she is a great spiritual counselor who can bring back your ex.
Thank you for this valuable information, i just looked her up now online. impressive
When someone is anyway able to bring you back a narcissistic ex, I bet than someone is perfectly able to be a narcissistic person as well.
Hi Danish ❤ contradicting you this time, I don’t think so there’s final discard ever actually, they always comeback and hoover when they get bored of the new supply and finds you more interesting and valuable
Maybe when they're younger and there's a bigger gene pool to chose from, people more flexible..... Pickings sure wane as we age but peace appreciated!
You have to learn how to protect yourself. You were just too innocent.❤❤❤
This is 1000% true. I lost so many friends over the smear campaign. I never knew what a narcissist was until I looked up
Why does
Someone ignore you for months at a time. That’s how I learned about the disorder. It devastated me to the core. I never thought I would survive this pain. It’s almost five years since the discard. It took all these years of therapy to get me through the worst imaginable thing
I’d ever been through.. he had everyone convinced I was crazy. His whole family blocked me and mutual friends turned their backs on me. I hope I never see him again as long as I live. He even had the new supply messaging me and told her I was stalking him. I never responded and blocked her. Wait until she finds out she’s next in line to go through what I went through. The worst thing that ever happened to me in my life. Glad he’s gone. Stay away from these monsters.. runnnnn and never look back. Everything that was said in this video is exactly the truth. I am relieved to know there’s people who can help and truly understand what these demons are capable of.
finally I exposed my narc husband in front of his most trusted people. Now that I know that love of my life is not going to come back he will definitely try to harm my 2 beautiful flowers. I am trying to be strong both emotionally and mentally 💪💪
That’s what our break up was over. I did something stupid out in public and he felt I ruined his image and he told me to get out he was done. I’m still in disbelief.
I set my boundry, i will not let her come back .
How I knew was I was done!
Couldn’t live like that anymore
Amen!
Narcissists have some of the most weirdest ways of sleeping .one of the most annoying I find is open mouth with head tilted all the way back on the pillow.
Hahahahaaaaaaaaa😂
Omg the truth here 😅
What the hell?? Lol ... They must be letting in all the demons through their open mouth! Just like a horror movies ...omg that's disgusting 🤢
even in sleep they are so self centered they dont care about your perception or comfort..repulsive
My narcissis, start talking ,snoring in extreme weird animals sound, turn exact side or move when I am moving, little slap arround my face or elbow arround my face while I am try to go deep sleep.
Even when I try to go wash room, he wakes up and asks all good 😮
How come in his deep sleep he knows he was hurting and disturbing me😢
I love the grounded reality of this channel!!!
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I'm 37 and have been looking for ways to be successful, please how??
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She's a licensed broker in the states 🇺🇸
After I raised up to 325k trading with her I bought a new House and a car here in the states 🇺🇸🇺🇸 also paid for my son's surgery (Oscar). Glory to God.shalom.
Can't imagine earning $85,000 biweekly, God bless Ms Claudia Ann Brandon , God bless America 🇺🇸♥️
Infidelity,lies and gaslighting goes hand in hand with them
remember right before the lovebombing stage ends, they will typically feel a deep shame. Out of the blue they might tell you they're not worthy, they don't deserve you, or something of the sorts. That's their deep shame and feeling of being inadequate. When you hear that, you know devaluation is coming. Because that negative feeling they are feeling, they will project on you: suddenly they'll spike up the gaslighting, and the devaluation starts. They lose interest in you, and inevitably something/someone else catches their attention, maybe they start chatting online with a few others. But, again, their perfect delusional self that they hold on to, cannot be a cheater.. nonono. So their lenses distort reality and they start being extremely suspicious of you, and start accusing you out of the blue, in a manner stronger than normal ''light'' jealousy, and coming out of nowhere. It's not out of nowhere, they are like children. Like every negative feeling, they are projecting it onto you: they got interested in someone else, the relationship is cold: it has to be your fault, they can't be held accountable. You can be then sure 100% they are interested in someone else, that projected emotion is not random.
My eternal thanks for your enlightenment. He turned our own son against me and my parents who were always kind and good to him. I had to say goodbye to my son. Exceedingly painful. He's 34 and still gravitates to the narcissist. Not sure why. My son was the last thing he could take to hurt me. I still hope my son finds his way even if it's without me.
I ended up being the one that "got away" from him. He's finally moved on to his next victim.
I personally don’t agree with that, mine deleted me, blocked me and didn’t talk to me for 3 years, not even in the slightest, I honestly thought it was the last time but then out of no where she adds me back on socials and starts talking again
He did not talk to me for a.year, now send me a message again as if nothing happened. I just did not anwser and will not anwser
Mine to 😂 6 months after he ran id with my cousin. 🤣🤣 Never would I give him a ounce of my time.
I have defeated a number of narcisist by standing my ground and not giving them an inch, at the end i get discarted, and thats fine by me.
The first time my brother introduced me to his fiancee she took a step back and looked at me like I was Satan himself. Never in my life did I get such a reaction from anybody. The rest of the night she refused to look at me or answer my questions. I knew then she was his flying monkey because my brother is a narcissist. Does anyone relate?
Once it gets nasty and fearless, it's final discard time. It doesn't mean she's done with you anyway. The smear camp will go on basically forever.
I am a avoidant so that narc chases me, I love him but I discarded him and i do not reach out no matter what.
Thank You Danish, preparation is my biggest defense weapon. No bad surprises with your videos, it helps the necessary self control
My husband and I were mentally and verbally abused by our evil narcissistic demon of an adult daughter, for years. It got so bad that the stress cause an emotional breakdown for my husband, One day he started crying uncontrollably with him gasping for air ( this is a guy that never cried because of his upbringing of men don't cry ) He was asking what he did wrong on raising her to be so evil then he collapsed and took his last breath 4 years and 7 months ago. She always had anger issues since she was a teen but we chopped it up as just being a teen and hormons since she seemed to be a very well rounded person overall. We noticed the changes in her as she got older and thought she was bipolar. But it was too late for us to get her help because she was over 18. She wouldn't amit that she has mental problems and get help. By the time I learned about narcissism, it was too late. The trauma damage was already done. In those horrible years of walking on eggshells she had us under her control because she was kicked out of her ex husband's home for stepping out on him and the trauma she caused. She ended back with us because she was homeless and 3 months pregnant with another's man child. So of course we took her in. She was lying from the start, telling us her marriage failed because he was abusing her physically. I know different now. We tried to help her, going through her pregnancy and the birth, then she couldn't handle being a mother. She wouldn't do what a mother should do and we ended up raising our grandson until he was 6 years old, She hunted down for a new supply because my husband became disabled and we couldn't give her a free ride anymore. She had to start paying her own way. That pissed her off and it really got bad. We ended up homeless with her stalking us and still messing with our heads. Then my husband died. She destroyed me beyond repair. I have been abandoned by everyone,... She made sure of that.. I went no contact but it is slowly killing me from the inside out. I can't have a relationship with my grandson. I can't function anymore. I'm the one that is at fault somehow. And you know what.. I'm starting to believe I must be. I'm just a failure and a lost cause.. I'm so tired of trying. I quit...
I am sorry
Don't give up. That's what they want. They want to kill you from the inside out. They are full of hate and jealousy and rage because you can love. Lean on God. He gives peace that surpasses all understanding. I'm praying for your peace and I'm sorry you have endured this abuse. It's not your fault.
Please know I am praying for you. Please get some counseling and support. Believe me I can relate. I am 67 and am grateful for you sharing this testimony to show others the magnitude of this evil.
So did you guys spoil her?
@@orhbo0 children can be raised by the same two parents and in the same home and turn out completely different.
These are pure facts. (My neighbors are still scared of me) I finally got away. He had his new supply and was insufferable and threatening. After I left, his source decided to go back to her kids Dad. No way to keep her from it. He completed self harm, and not one person came to 'take care' of him. I came back to Florida to do it. (Lost some friends) but he was my husband for 34 years, I at least could do that for him. He was in the coroners place 8 days by the time I got back, his family refused to help in any way.
Yes, my ex-husband was completely as you described; however, it was extremely severe because he had no one to replace me with. He caused me to lose my career, stole every penny from me, forged my name on so many money related documents that were unknown to me or my attorney until after the judge stamped the papers, he stalked me until I filed a police report, sabotaged my car, and so many other evil things, even eluding to the safety of my life. My life was hell for fifteen years, and it took three years to get the divorce finalized. And the behavior didn't stop there. It continued for a couple of more years. Penniless, I had to find a way to move away. In fact, one of my children does not want me to come visit him because if his father finds out I am anywhere in the vicinity, he is afraid for me. So he has to travel to come visit me instead.
Found out the truth last week to why he discarded me in March. He still hoovered me up until then. Doubt he’ll be back now. He blocked me everywhere.
The final discard actually came from me... When I exposed his BS for what it was and he actually had to do damage-control in fear of losing "options."
Thank you for explaining it so well.
It’s word by word exactly my life rn and it’s nothing I have ever experienced or imagined. I’m so confused and in my own head still trying to make sense of what to do and feel, like I don’t know how to move forward. The most basic life chores seem impossible like something is stopping me from doing them.
I literally feel like you are telling my story word for word. I feel that my heart has been tore out of my chest, like am going to die and he walks around happy as can be my children and I are hurting so much & he doesn't care at all
I'm so glad you're free of him though! And I know it's hard, but please just know that narcs can NEVER actually be happy. It's all an act. I know you probably know this, but it can't hurt to hear over and over! When I was dealing with my narc I kept questioning everything until it finally sunk in and clicked one day...and ever since that day, I haven't shed a single tear! Truly! I can look back and just shake my head, sometimes I can even laugh. Mostly I just feel bad for whoever they ended up marrying. (They seem like a really nice person...because narcs always choose a good supply, which means someone kind hearted and selfless. Too bad I am actually not quite as "nice" as I appear at first glance lol. Meaning I did NOT take crap for very long! (But can admit I took it too long...it took a close friend and my family convincing me that I wasn't crazy to finally cut them out of my life completely in one fell swoop!)
But all that to say, I am SO sorry you're going through the tough emotions, as good as it is to be free of your narc. Keep telling yourself that the reason you feel like you're going to die is because you actually have a heart and a soul. This man does NOT! And he's in "actor" mode now trying to win over his new supply (if he hasn't already.) But a narc does not feel true joy, love or happiness. You can be assured their smiles are all hollow and are only for show. They may have a "fun" time for a month or two, but they never have "happy" times.
What helped me was to just keep watching videos like this and listen to other people's stories so I felt less alone and less crazy. Eventually, like I said, I woke up one day and the grief was gone! It took a little while of course, but it WILL come for you too. Having kids makes it that much tougher, but just keep reminding them that nothing he does is their fault. If he doesn't have shared custody, it's also ok to gently start talking to them about narc abuse (if they're old enough to understand of course). And if they're too young, a good therapist or even school counselor can help them at least talk through some of their emotions in a specific way to encourage healing. Sending you healing vibes! Hang in there...surviving a narc is one thing I can assure you DOES get better. It won't be as painful as it is right now for very much longer now that you've discovered the truth behind what's really going on
My exact same story. He is living his best life. Hang in there. It will get better. It is for me me and my kids, slowly, every day
I was recently love bombed like crazy then out of no where the one who promised me forever and all these luxury things and places we’ll see and go switched his feel off in the blink of an eye, It caused me to Stalk him, Self Harm, Lose out in work and ended up in a psych hospital, I could shake it he did me wrong but I was the one begging him back I couldn’t understand the coldness I wanted that love again I just called over 300 times in 3 weeks begging pleading crying I couldn’t sleep eat talk I isolated I wanted it back how could he hurt me then turn everything on me? Was it my fault? I should’ve just keep my mouth shut,, I went into a down world spiral that even God couldn’t get me out, But I’m here today even though a big pet of me is dying for that validation that I wasn’t crazy and that apology I know I deserved I’m here to rebuild myself I have a long way to go but I’m here I don’t know how this will happen but I’m going to try
UPDATE I no longer care lol and in my healing stage not just from him but from all men, I’m felling extremely hopeful and spiritually, There are times where I revert back to a hurt place but immediately overcome it with prayer and prayer only, I’m not in no contact I’m in we’ll never speak again contact and we’ll never meet again contact lol Stay blessed guys
„Legally, you can’t take action. „ The legal system has to change. I talked to a lawyer, and he said he couldn’t do anything, even though the impact was high. I could not accept a better-paying position in time as I developed depression. If he had stolen money from me, it would have been a different story. In the end, I was told that I would find a new man soon, which I found insulting.“
It's so infuriating, what they take it worse than stealing anything let alone money.
This is very accurate to my experience with my ex. 💯
Awesome video Danish. Thank you for your help. You are a blessing ❤
Exactly. Law enforcement often doesn't understand narcissistic abuse and the often accompanying rather unusual to police . criminal behavior ..
They need to be held accountable for what they do. They think since they don't leave bruises that you can't do anything. Get proof start making them be held accountable.
Great episode. It’s definitely tough fighting them in court this one I had manipulated the judge I saw the bailiff nodding her head in sympathy for him. This is crazy he did everything up to the date to destroy me and judge barely gave me anything. He laughed at the judge when she said if he continues to be disrespectful she’d put him in jail. After the second time she said it he knew she was giving empty threats. He saw she wasn’t gonna do nothing so he kept up his antics. Unbelievable what they get away with. He really turned on his satanic behavior and I watched all of these people feel sorry for him. There were young adults in there he didn’t appear to be able to fool them not sure why maybe you can add an episode about the younger people who can’t be fooled.
A narcissist and his girlfriend just made my life hell, I wish I knew how to deal with these demons back then. Thanks for raising awareness about these kind of people
I'm not sure if the final discard has happened from his point of view. I thought it had, but he's tried to contact me recently. But I do know that I reached a stage where I knew I was done. Completely done. I now feel immune to his nonsense. It came at such a high price and I've got so much work to do on myself, but I'm at a good starting point. Thank you, Danish
There's no such thing as final discard by a narcissist -- WE decide we're done, everyone. These jackals come back again and again and again, trying their lame hoovers at unexpected times.
It is NOT up to THEM.
It's up to US.
CHOOSE YOURSELF.
No one needs a narc in their life.
He had a countdown for me, once the kids were old enough he said he would be "done" with me. I have been discarded almost our whole relationship. His cheating and humiliation of me was my downfall because I loved him. He gets mad and kicks me out. I can't remember a time when I was'nt a disappointment to him.
Damn! Everything you said happened to me. My final discard was because I know to damn much about him and he decided to give me the final discard because I was on to his fooliness. It’s been 1 yr and 5 months, he’ll tap in once in a while as a unknown caller to play games on my phone. 😂
😂😂😂Good for you 😂😂😂 Congratulations 🎉
@@patriceroach6373 Smh! You’re trying to be sarcastic!
This was highly informative. I façed the exact things in the whole course of last year, and was confused what's happening and how to overcome. U have great clarity
How about narcisistic siblings? My brother has destroyed our wntire family.
The better sibling passed on, the ones left are pretty bad narcs. I cannot have an opinion, they ghost or rage.
ex nard told me to leave, i filed for divorce, he illegally evicted me and our son, we moved out, he knocks on my door, giving gifts, our eviction records end in august, we are going to move away asap.
You are so accurate every thing you say is what I have lived in my entire life with 2 important relationships with narcissists .
Very insightful. Thank you.
No mine never came back he didn’t have to he had many other options
im about to lose my mind.... i went back with her after a 6 month break, it lastet for 2 days and endet so fucking bad......
like i just dont understand her behavior....
im so done with life...... im tired....
guess schizophrenia + Narcissm = run away
I am unsure if my bf has another supply. He just asked for space because he is grieving. Everytime I ask him if he's with someone else so I can leave him and let her have him. He said there's no one and I'm just a paranoid wreck.
Sometimes they still want you back after the final discard. My mom let me be homeless, but now she still wants me back so she doesn’t have to keep arguing with my “golden child” brother. So yeah, they still want you back, or else they will start to destroy each other.
My mom's resources have always meant more to me than her love. It's cycles of abandonment gift bombs. Bringing me to rage. Love is understanding and she has none
What you say about narcissists is so true. Its a shame they dont want help for a mental illness which predisposes them to do drugs, alcohol abuse, to stealing, jail, and prison. Our prisons and jails are all full of ppl with NPD. Five years or more of psychotherapy and desire to not be controlled by NPD can help them. The disorder can be controlled.