Girls Read Their Couple Fights Over Text | ZULA Perspectives | EP 13
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- Опубликовано: 2 июн 2020
- In this episode of ZULA Perspectives, 6 girls share about the fights they have with their boyfriends over text and how they resolve arguments with each other. Watch the video for some advice on that.
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Featuring (in order of appearance):
Lim An - / lalalaloves
Phoebe Chen - / phoebebeibei
Shanice Kwok - / girlinboxers
Charmaine Sew - / charmainesew
Amanda Feng - / amandalpaca
Nur Afifah - / fifahfofum
Produced By:
Sheryl Chua - / sherellebobbyjohnson
Filmed By:
Sheryl Chua
Edited By:
Sheryl Chua
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hello@zula.sg
If you guys want a guy version let us know so we can film part 2! And if you would like to share with us, drop us an email.
lol childish girls
YES!!
How are any of these " fights"? These are just imo mild disagreements that were settled rather quickly.
Well the point was that these "fights" were simple enuf to understand in a video with multiple people
And also to show how to solve a problem instead of fighting about it for an extended period of time
Ok the title might be a little clickbait-y
I've never felt more single. Who do I fight with everytime? That's right, myself
Yeah lor, talk to myself and comfort myself siah gg
You guy or girl? Wanna be friends?
Lmfao same
haha while everyone is calling out these girls (and low key being very sexist) i just want to say that i can relate. somehow in relationships, these small texts usually just trigger a bigger issue pent up inside and can blow up into an argument. i once fought with my boyfriend about accidentally zoning out when he talked about his day. it somehow ended up with us fighting about being there for each other until i cried LOL. yes of course in the third person perspective i realised now how unreasonable these fights can be, but it really is deeper than just these messages and are usually reflections of things couples need to work out within themselves.
YA completely agree!!!
hope you and your bf has sorted that issue. well wishes tc.
Yessss I agreeee
Thank youuu for taking ur time to write this
Bcos ppl here aren't rly getting it by saying "how are these arguments" and actually
Zula shld hv addressed this in the video
this!!. n like third party dont know the whole story n they r also not even a part of it so, ofc they wld say such things n not understand. they will say its petty n whatnot till it happens to them. between couples, its not petty🤷🏽♀️
People in the comments are so quick to judge... fights are different across couples and what is considered a fight to the couples, might not be a fight in your eyes in your own relationships. I do not relate to their fights but I understand their emotions. If all the girls in the video seem to have had ‘unreasonable’ or ‘childish’ fights to some of you, then the video just truly conveys that in most cases emotions are high when arguing on text which can result in ‘petty’ fights. I believe the point of the video was for them to talk about what happened in the past and what they learned, how they overcome it, not a tea session to give judgmental people juicy details on couple fights
YES THIS. Just because you don’t relate to someone’s feelings or emotions doesn’t mean that their feelings n emotions are any less important. If you aren’t able to comprehend or understand why it’s considered a fight to them, u have your right to speak, just please don’t be mean. There is no need to say they are being petty or sensitive whatsoever :( A big situation to one can mean barely anything to another and hence this comment section did not pass the vibe check :// Kudos to those out there trying to understand!! & thankyou for this :D @Ab Nas
👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏yaasss
Thank uuuu
Im too young (17) to have went thru ""stupid"" fights so I don't have experience, but I do understand what y'all are saying and what the video is for
I just dk how to write a comment in a way for ppl to understand that they're being ""unnecessaryly"" mean
Just had a mini disagreement and this video popped up in my feed. It’s really true, “is this fight even necessary?” Sometimes we are just being emotional and it can get the best of us. Especially when your SO doesn’t know what to do when you’re upset.
i few sew's wasnt really a fight tho.... Idk
I agree.
In the text there was nothing that appeared as a confrontation to me.
But then Sew said after she saw Axel's reply 8 hrs later whatever anger she had built up had settled down.
So there was anger.
But could it be that the anger was conjured up against the people who tried to hack her IG account?
Maybe she was angry at the hackers?
Maybe the anger was not due to Axel?
In any case i am glad she realized the power of taking a break. (Maybe not necessarily 8 hrs)
@@rayroar1117 yah i feel its more angry towards hacker cause she was concerned for him
I was confused tooo
I am not targetting Afifah but she reminds me of a very common problem of promises.
The main cause of her upset was her boyfriend breaking his promise of being there for her because he fell asleep.
I am sure at that point he said that statement which sounded like a promise to make her feel better.
Little did he realize the thing he said with loving intentions could be interpreted as a promise and used against him. Or should i say used against them (by anger). Because in a fight, nobody really wins.
I wonder, instead of saying things that could be interpreted as promises, is there another way to help one's girlfriend feel better...
Maybe each time she feels insecure just offer her a hug without saying anything.
I am not sure.
Hugs work wonders
How can he be offering a hug when she’s on an exchange. I believe her frustrations were amplified bc of the distance.
So the hug without words can work for when the couple is beside each other.
As for exchange, maybe they can connect in a different way.
Just one example which i have seen before. Is if the boyfriend has a dog then he can tell the girlfriend "my dog says hi.
1. Next he says woof.
2. Next he says he is happy to talk to you.
3. Next he gets his dinner and starts wagging his tail."
You know when you get your dog to speak for you instead there are so many things you can get away with
Such as statement number 2.
Couples like to bicker (engage in low intensity warfare by putting each other down under the pretext that it is meant as a joke), so in an environment where they bicker for fun a lot they may feel uncomfortable saying statement number 2.
That he is "happy to talk to you."
By the way i am not saying that bickering is wrong.
Bickering has its benefits too. It may seem negative on the surface level but it can prevent more negatives from coming up.
One benefit of bickering, is that it can guard against suspicion.
Some people can get suspicious in a relationship (why is he/she treating me so well? What does he or she want from me?)
Especially in quiet moments sometimes these thoughts come up. And for some individuals these thoughts start to rule their mind.
So bickering is like an atomic bomb to rid those suspicious thoughts of their power. (He criticizes you so often, what do you mean he "treats you so well". So whenever he treats you well its because he wants to and not because he is trying to get something from you.)
So unfortuantely, sometimes we need to engage in bickering in a relationship for various reasons. Such as to rid suspicious thoughts of their power.
But bickering creates an environment where praise and good words (especially they direct ones) may sound cringey.
So how to get around it?
Well, maybe get your dog to speak it for you!
Say that the dog said it.
The dog is happy to see you.
Or maybe the teddy bear.
The teddy bear is happy to speak with you.
sew one so cute sia “ok baby i will do it later” CUTE
The advices given can also work well with your friends. Definitely good for a lot of relationships or friendships.
After gg thru many kiddy fights w
my bf, I believe taking a timeout when u r boiling w emotions is necessary bcoz it prevents u from saying stuff u shouldn’t/ would regret saying. Cool down first, then talk to each other rationally.
but i loved this🥺🥺💖
*there there*
the forgetfullness part is damn pain man, u may think forgetting small things isn't an issue but mark my words it will.
why does no one talk abt friendship fights over text:')
love love love zula
I feel like the things they are “arguing” about are pretty childish
Yea I wouldn't even register any of this as an argument. its just conversation but apparently girls get emotional about this stuff haha
Lol yeah youngsters
Very childish
After watching this vid, I cherish my wife even more. She ain’t this problematic
Aw the first conversation is cute
omg ms shaniceeee!!
OMG ITS MS SHANICEEE
Quite a few of the replies were all provocative/paggro; it could be put across in a nicer way.
#1: Ok, the guy stated the fact and she given her a reply to justify. Nothing wrong with that. The hypothetical scenario in the 1st reply is not a great way to respond tho. But tbh, i think most guys would not be upset if a girl has to answer a call for 20 mins. For a one-time event, its totally understandable.
#2: The girl was scolding him for his forgetfulness/messiness. Its just a bad match i suppose. The reply by the girl becomes an insult at "Forget everything then don't need graduate dont need degree...".
#3: The girl mistook his concerns. Oh well.
As for the rest, its really nothing much
what fight? u see my chat history then u show what is real fight --"
people who use LOL passive aggressively are the worst
half of these werent even a fight wthell
If it's falling asleep then..it's not exactly a choice? to phrase it as "much rather sleep in" is a pretty unfair
Cant relate, evergreen for 26 years liao
the second girl was abit too sensitive though... sure enough yes forgetting things is what her bf should have worked on but instead of nicely telling him, she just lashed out on him. A simple just rmb to do so next time, i cant alway remind u but if i can i’ll! Thats a supportive partner. No one wants someone that just lashes out at u during simple stuff like this
True i agree. But speaking from a girl's point of view, i understand where she is coming from. It is incredibly irritating if your partner keeps forgetting things. In this case it is not just about specs. He forgets other stuff too, tgat then requires her to pick up the slack and clean up after him. case in point "switch off lights" "keep clothes". I think she lashed out only because it happens all the time, too often. Honestly most girls don't ask for much. We just want a reliable partner. In this case his forgetfulness also shows how irresponsible and unreliable he is. From an outsiders perspective though, both of them are not compatible for each other.
Joel Lim she’s a girlfriend, not a mom
lol the people in the comments who don't think these "fights" are important enough to be considered fights are definitely guys who don't understand the perspective of girls, or probably don't even have a gf.
I’m a girl and in a committed relationship and even i think these “fights” are not even considered fights. These are merely just little arguments/squabbles. Given the benefit of doubt, yes, maybe they were “fights” and were taken out of context for privacy issues for the video, but if it’s gonna be produced with that title then it should have been produced/done better imo. I’m just sharing my two cents because i don’t think it’s right for you to straightaway assume that people who don’t agree with this video for what it claims to be is what you think they are. It’s almost like saying “people who like pretty girl pictures are definitely perverted guys”. Not a 1:1 comparison but you get my point on drawing conclusions/assumptions.
How the fuck are these fights? If these are fights, then arguments with my parents is a civil war
Other than An's issue, I really don't understand how the others can lead to an argument, especially the forget-specs and instagram one. Like girls, calm down. If I forget my specs, that's my problem. If I don't care enough to set 2fa, that's my account. U huanlo? Give space man, even for couples.
Exactly lol, these girls have like anxiety issues or some form of complex, like wtf chill out these are such minor things, and their male counterparts were not even condescending or impatient in any way
im a girl and the specs one i just w h a t how can u get angry at that
come on, all yall see is js the guy forgetting it 'once' (for the vid). u guys don't knw behind the r/s how many times the partner forgets and irritate the girl which causes the girl to remind him repeatedly that is annoying.
I have no clue how Shanice was able to misread the message her boyfriend sent her completely. It didn't miss the mark by a bit but by a whole lot
I don't even have a partner to argue with or to care for... sigh why am I watching this?
Aha these are applicable to platonic relationships too actually :)))
I think
So being non confrontational also equates to being passive aggressive. Got it
As a girl, I feel like these 'fights' were all started by the girls being irritated/paggro haha, and the guys were trying their best to respond in a good way. But then again I've totes done that myself as well lol (being paggro) so can totally relate haha
Why you all starting such small fight and getting angry over? I dont understand.
I pity their boyfriends. I had one before like the girl that wants to keep talking about herself while the guy is trying to sleep. Immediately regret my mistake and ran away. Now I'm happily living with my parents playing xbox and eating pizza in my basement.
Imagine texting your partner that you forgot your spec, with the intention to make her or him laugh, but instead get scolded/lectured I-
Imagine being scolded for ACCIDENTALLY falling asleep I-
He already have the intention to stay awake for HER just to make her feel better but unfortunately, his body can’t work it out but yet this girl?????? She really doesn’t know how fortunate she is to have such a boyfriend, yucks.
Girls are so difficult
being in a relationship with all the dramas that come with it is so "luo suo" la. usually its just just lust or temporary infatuation, then after a few times doing the deeds over a period of a time while in the relationship, the spark already gone. especially if cohabitate together you will find all kinds of flaw and you become super annoyed over everything then you know its time to move on. hit it and quit it. single is always better. #MGTOW
Wow alot of this shows how unreasonable some Singaporean girls can be.
You expect people to stay up late for you, and not be able to sleep jsut so you can talk? What are you 8 years old ?
Wow.
How is charmaine's one considered a fight? Sounds phony hahaha. There wasnt even a disagreement.
Why use lol when you are angry?
it does gives a sarcasm vibe especially when you dont use it often
Don’t
Mind me saying don’t have to make such a big deal
Meh? These are fights, for reals??
what does black face mean in this ?
i think it means something like an expression that is not outwardly angry or but you can tell that the person is angry/annoyed. maybe like " -.- ". i think "black" as in like dark and gloomy but not too sure!
black meaning they legit look quite unhappy and pissed
In chinese saying 'hei lian' = black face, meaning that the person is teething with anger, showing an obvious unhappiness on their face.
pulling a black face (not the Justin Trudeau's literal painting his face black in college kind) means to look grumpy. I think its very much a singaporean/malaysian nomenclature/slang to describe someone's grumpy face like we do to describe a lot of things like "backside itchy", "see you no up"
angry/pissed
Youngsters lol
9 minutes of women making life complicated
girl at 4:03 made me facepalm.
Those girls are very childish. We African women are kind and nothing like these childish girls.