"If you're the victim of abuse.....do not hesitate to reach out to loved ones...." I hate to break it to you .... but that's what got me here in the first place.
@@magentapyramid9245 hard when its "loved ones" who are the abusers. One of mine actually told me once its dangerous when a narcissist has a psychology degree which she has i didn't realize she meant herself.
@@jon2679 That's why you don’t ever mix family in your mental health journey when they are a therapist or a have a degree involving the mind because it causes an imbalance of power and hinders your healing. The separation of family and mental health is very important when they have been apart of the abuse or not supportive of your well-being or growth, similar to your situation.
@@AlternativeHomesteading Yea, that could be since on the surface they come off as just normal people but once u start to know them it just goes downhill from there
I was abused emotionally, physically and mentally by my brothers, parents, inlaws and husband. Not to mention teachers and classmates. For over 30 years. I finally learned to stand up for myself.
Abuse and trauma survivor. I'm always being told that I live in my past cause how it has rewired my brain. They don't understand the impact that it has on someone's brain, and it takes a lifetime to undo
Same & I hate it. No one realizes that it’s all going on subconsciously & if we knew how to be or even act like the happy awesome people we were before that we’d be doing it! It’s something so horrifying that no one who hasn’t experienced it can ever wrap their mind around it. I know I never could have. I’ve got a book on rewiring your brain that’s helped me more than I can even convey with words & I have been through some seriously dark, sick, & cruel things I thought could only happened in horror films so anything that can help me is on miracle level lol It’s called breaking the habit of being yourself by Dr Joe Dispenza. That’s the ONLY thing that’s had an impact in the 5yrs I’ve been seeking healing. Oh & somatic exercises is something I’m just learning about & so far it has blown my mind. The holistic psychologist is the channel I found ❤
Facts. I still struggle with childhood trauma and I'm 34. I don't trust anyone. Because everyone I ever let in just wants to use me or hurt me. I'm trying to learn to be kind to myself.
omg THIS. My mom says the exact same thing to me when I try to bring up the reasons for my trauma and why I act and feel the way I do. I tried to explain how it's literally a physical change and I didn't even get to finish explaining before she told me to "get over it" ???
@@davidarvingumazon5024How are you confused? They defined abuse as in any form from physical, emotional or sexual abuse can mess with someone's mind. Trauma can alter how a person sees the world.
@@davidarvingumazon5024I'm very concerned for you if you don't understand what counts as physical, verbal or physiological abuse. You should know hitting someone is wrong.
I didn't blame myself but I became a blubbery hot mess and I was in continual distress until I was finally told by a priest that I was being emotionally abused. I didn't know that was a thing. This was some decades ago before the internet was what it is now on this topic. I'm still trying to heal from it all.
I will keep you in my prayers throughout this evening because you deserve to be in an environment where you feel loved, supported, and valued and I'll pray that you get out of the unhealthy environment you're in sooner.@@yolondathorpe8117
@@higherlearning7668 I live in my parents home. I want to live by the beach. I always wanted to. I really don't care if I will be near the Newport Inglewood fault system. Where I live down, I am not far from the monster.
Abuse rewires your brain. When you are being abused, your brain becomes like a sponge and you begin to learn things from your abuser. You may even begin to develop similar traits. Because this is being taught to you. Many abusers justify their behaviour. They will make you believe that it is acceptable. Some can be influential or charismatic. So this behaviour may begin to rub off on you. But at your core, you are still you. You just need to unlearn what was taught to you. While they may need to start again from the beginning. Which is why they will learn positive traits from you and mimic them in front of other people. Because they learned the wrong things. Many of them have an arrested development. They’re not fully developed humans.
@@dantemendizabal675 You're not f'd up. You have self-awareness. You recognise that something is wrong, which means that you can change it. You can heal from the trauma. You can process the emotions and rewire your brain. You can become better than who you were before you experienced abuse. In November 2017, I was suicidal. In August 2018, I created my first video on RUclips. By January 2019 I was already monetised. August 2019, I had 30,000 subscribers. May 2021, I had 100,000 subscribers. You can do anything. It all begins by believing in yourself and cutting off negative people.
That's true. Do you know that brains fully rested shows more empathy than a tired one? It tells how your brain actually function really well and not the abusers. They're functioning with a tired brain :p
Unfortunately, for many abused people, the response is neither fight or flight but freeze. It's so overwhelming that people just freeze and remain in an abusive relationship until they become conditioned or 'used' to it for lack of a better word.
Very true! JESUS CHRIST saved my soul and only through HIS unconditional love and understanding of who I am in HIM has truly healed and continues to heal me🥰 I pray the same for anyone reading this❣️ John 3:16, John 14:6
That part! What's worse is trying to explain to someone who hasn't experienced abuse only makes it worse bc they begin to victim blaming & that's another form of abuse as well. I hate that I'm "not alone" in this bc I wouldn't wish abuse on anyone. HOWEVER, I'm completely understood amongst other abused ppl! My hopes, dreams & prayers are for us all to be heard, healed & loved... all the best to you on your journey! Laugh, get out in the sun, learn something new 💛
Sometimes they are just really stressed or it's part of their culture. They can be really sweet and caring. They just have outburst. Sometimes it can be my fault.
Society has for some time now evolved more around hate or hate & exploitation under the guise of love (like handing out "cures" in the form of beauty-products to provide the citizens with the nessecities to fix their bodily flaws where there weren't nessecarily flaws to be found) than actual love/care for each other.
Those who do that display a lack of self-awareness or empathy. They have a habit of blaming others or project feelings of insecurity perhaps due to unresolved trauma & shame or guilt. It's important to practice communication. When things are bothering you. You should learn to open up or talk about it rather than staying silent & suppressing your feelings which will not do you any good in the long run if you want to maintain a strong & healthy relationship with people.
This is it in a nutshell. I don't have a victim mentality but when someone really sets upon you and tries to rip you apart in all ways, am I to feel grateful for not having consented to it? It's on us to be settled within ourselves so that we don't trample on others.
@Seanus32 my problem is I have a victim mentally. One of many things my Therapist and I will work on in 2025. Of course when my Personal assistant and husband stand in my Personal and yell at me about I don't appreciate them, and I am selfish. Of course God's sister Karma got them
@@Jetsparx373 I could never indulge in this personally. Surely the other person's inner being matters, in itself. Surely my own healthy inner experiencing matters too. Treating the other as a role-player is too short-sighted...🌌
It stays with you all your life. Affects your relationships to form properly. You don’t trust what people say to you. It stunts your growth. Yo let good people come into your life but don’t let them stay. I know, I’m 67 yrs old and abuse is always coming to the forefront of my mind from events that happened when I was a very young child . I wear a smile on my face like a shield to protect me.
You hit the proverbial nail on it's head. You always hear "don't isolate". Well, I finally did 8 years ago and they've been the best 8 years of my life. Yes, I am alone. Lonely? Not a chance. I got my furbaby...who is not a substitute for human relationships, no..humans are the substitute, sorry, not missing any of that. I live alone, work alone for myself...no contact with those I have to be no contact and no human will ever convince me this is not FOR ME the best route.
I was a victim of extreme physical, verbal and psychological violence and this video helped me understand more of how my brain may work due to my experiences. Many people in my life make fun of me for many things related to my trauma (fear of relationships, awful memory, having hard time being myself, apologizing a lot and being quiet) which sucks
I’m so sorry for the pain you’ve endured and for how others have treated you-it’s not fair, and you don’t deserve that. The effects of trauma are real and valid, and it takes incredible strength to acknowledge and navigate them. Please know that your healing journey is yours, and it’s okay to set boundaries with people who don’t respect that. You deserve kindness, understanding, and support as you move forward. 💛 You're not alone in this.
I've been going through this nonsense my whole life buts it's funny how when your in your darkest hour it shows your true character ever since that day a couple months ago my mental health is improving and I now have the resources to get of very bad situation so I don't really know what that experience us going to be like honestly
I went through that and still am going through some of it but I’ve healed a lot and realized that the brain is a great muscle and once you feed it more love and positivity it becomes stronger and easier to control. Once that happens you have real control of you reality. It becomes more balanced and you start to forget the meaning you give the abuse which is subconsciously happening, instead of hiding and emotionally rejecting any type of goodness you are more open and able to receive all types of blessings
I have brain damage from abuse by my mother that started before I could talk. When I was around 2 something happened and I was at the bottom of the basement stairs and my dad thought I was dead. I‘be had seizures ever since. I’m a survivor and my mother was the first person I had to survive. The physical abuse stopped when I was 17 and I hit her back one time and threatened her, but the emotional, mental and psychological abuse never stopped. I have forgiven her, but I will forever have issues due to her abuse.
I made the mistake of my entire life by falling in love with a guy around 2013. Now he uses every single one of my own words actions and feelings against me and by gang stalking me daily
I was in a toxic relationship for 2 years. My ex would verbally and mentally abuse me and she eventually got a third degree assault charge for attacking me. I'm glad we're not together anymore
@deL_Zayd0 I am so sorry that happened to u.. I was not once ever verbally or physically abusive to the guy who i actually felt was my soul mate when he placed a felony aggravated stalking charges on me and it was very shocking and confusing and I was deeply upset and hurt and distraught by the entire situation. Now he stalking me and has my home rigged with hidden cameras and I can't prove anything and nobody will help me out. I don't care about any of this situation anymore and I don't want anything else to do with him or anybody else. I just really want to be left alone and have my life to myself by myself and live in peace
If anyone reading this during the holiday season and struggle with this time of year you are not alone. My ex who was an abuser would turn into a full on demon during the holidays. If you are not in the holiday spirit due to loss or abuse or just not interested you are not weird or alone. I don't find joy in the corny Christmas movies and the same music over and over. I rather just find peace with a handful of good people with no wild festivities. The horrible person is out of my life now yet the scars remain. Luckily, I am past the fight or flight which took YEARS to regain but I got there! You can too! Sending healing wishes to whomever may need to hear! xx
Thank you! I can only remember a handful of holidays that were barely tolerable as a kid. I try to do my best to GIVE, but avoid the actual time spent there. If that makes sense. I’m happier eating a salad and a piece of salmon watching the Gilmore Girls in my pajamas and yapping on the phone in my cave. This year I don’t have my own cave…. So I have to deal with this thing. I might just make up some ‘errands’ I forgot to do, get in my jeep and bail… ALONE! ✨🥰🙏🕊🌹💫❄️✨
@@OfficeOffice-d3p I do not understand your response. What do you mean "don blame demon"? That is what his behavior tuned into. He was not religious. ( born into a Catholic household but not practicing himself). Not sure about your point. He was an evil person when mixed with the stress of the holidays ( for whatever reason in his head) and drinking turned into the worst a person could be. Hes out of my life so that is a blessing.
Actually I AM quite alone and that is exactly the way I want it. But don't gaslight...it's rude. I have a couple of mental illnesses..neither of them result in a cognitive deficit.
Thanks. I am a nearly total recluse now. I have my dogs for a family and a cat. I stay alone; I don’t want any people anymore. I continue to be remotely attacked; it’s never-ending Hell.
I struggle with severe anxiety, major depression and PTSD, as a result of all the trauma in my past, and hearing about how trauma affects the brain makes me realize I’m not broken, I’ve just been through things that changed me. Having gone through a toxic environment at home, I was always on edge, waiting for something bad to happen, and I think my brain just got stuck in that mode. Even now, as an adult, I feel like I’m constantly in fight or flight mode, even when there’s nothing threatening me.
I remember few years back after my wife died, I was left alone with 3 kids. I suffered severe depression and mental disorder. Got diagnosed with cptsd. Not until a friend recommended me to psilocybin mushrooms treatment. Psilocybin treatment changed my life for better. I can proudly say i'm totally clean for 6 years and still counting. Always look to nature for solution to tough problems, Shrooms are phenomenal.
I love hearing great life changing stories like this. I want to become a mycologist because honestly mushrooms are the best form of medicine (most especially the psychedelic ones) There are so many people today used magic mushrooms to ween off of SSRI medication- its amazing! Years back i wrote an entire essay about psychedelics. they saved you from death buddy, lets be honest here.
Hey mates! Can you help with the source? I suffer severe anxiety, panic and depression and I usually take prescription medicine, but they don't always help. Where can I find those psilocybin mushrooms? I'm really interested in treating my mental health without Rxs. I live in Australia don't know much about these. I'm so glad they helped you. I can't wait to get them too. Really need a reliable source 🙏
I'm so very happy for you mate, Psilocybin is absolutely amazing, the way it shows you things, the way it teaches you things. I can not believe our world and our people shows less interest about it's helpfulness to humanity. It's love. The mushrooms heals people by showing the truth, it would be so beneficial for so many people, especially politicians and the rich who have lost their way and every other persons out there.
My girlfriend suffers from past abuse and still lives with the family that causes it, I've been doing my best to help her and find videos for her hoping that maybe by understanding it, it might help her heal. She is currently suffering from depression and bad intrusive thoughts as well. I long for the day I can get her out of her situation. Thank you for making videos like these, they really help me help her, and help her find herself. 💕
@@ADcrackerjack That's the goal, we are both underage and she lives far away, we've been dating long distance for several months now. We've been trying to find a way to get her here sooner, but without her parents' permission our hands are tied.
Can I just saying you doing this is so beautiful. I had a partner who’d never do anything like this for me whether it came to the abuse I went through or just learning about my health issues. So kudos to you. Sending lots of love to the both of you ❤
@@-Wave-ol get a job, both of you (if you don’t have one already), don’t drop school (if you both are studying) and keep the romance alive. Best to you two little fellas. Keep us posted.
Wow, you're very sweet. That's the biggest dream of all abuse victims , to have someone who loves you enough to help you and stay by your side. I pray and hope that you'll be able to get her out of such a situation and live happily together.
It's not just the brain, it's the whole body. Memories are stored in nerves outside the body too. People with bad trauma will shut off communication with their bodies and won't understand their feelings or impulses.
I’m 63 and still a work in progress. One of the times I was inpatient at the hospital I experienced “body memories” which was frightening because it felt like I could feel him touching me as he did when I was a child. I was blessed because I had good healthcare to help me through my crisis. I know not everyone has that and my heart goes out to you. Just never give up!
I dream and redream my sexual childhood abuse at the hands of my Earthly Father who knew his brother was had been and was contuine sexually abusing me. My dreams are ev3ry night pick up same place to continue yet I'm blessed because I don't vividly frame by frame rember exactly what was done to my sexually by my uncle. Do I have triggers? Two of mine are humming sound of florescent lights and the hum of electricity going into golf carts to charge the batteries. Repeated music same cords played over and over. Ur give me hope to someday not be the victims any more and rember the g9od happened to me instead of both being in the way back place of my memory.n@@Aussiemommy
Thank you for this. My husband of almost 20 years was very abusive and I finally was able to leave three months ago, and although I am already doing so much better, it will still take a lifetime to heal. ❤
I have been violently abused, physically, emotionally, and psychologically by my father from my birth to the age of 10. After that I developed a severe social anxiety and inability to feel, make friends, connect to others, have boundaries,.... I always stayed in this place of prey, always felt like others were bigger than me and could assault me in every moment. Today I am 20 and I finally started therapy, I understand after about 10 years that walking in the street could cause me a panic attack was not normal. Thank you for your video, it really helps. And I hope that all people who got through abuse finally heal from it, and can start to live, and not survive anymore 💞
lovely share about your life ,mayyoongi . 20 minutes sleep in steam sauna each day and visiting ocean/river/lake sail boat ride is repairing me bones and heart from abuse 💕💕💕
How horrible your own dad.my dad died when I was almost 13 It devastated life I started drinking and hanging around the wrong friends which let to abusive relationships
Timestamps 1). The brain under stress 0:33 2). Memory and learning 1:19 3). Emotional blunting 2:07 4). Emotional dysregulation 2:48 5). Impulsive decis-making 3:34 6). Depression and anxiety 4:32 Hope this helps you out. Hope you have a nice day. Sorry this is so late. 💙💙💙💙💙💙
I’m a survivor and slowly learning how to piece myself back together in my adulthood. It’s a lot of work, but I’ve loved learning about myself in the process and how my brain has literally tried its best to protect me from the severe emotional abuse I endured. Thanks so much for this video. ❤
Recognizing this as a problem is the first step to healing yourself. It may take a good part of your life, but learn something useful and let the bad go. Don't get stuck there.
If untreated; the pain never ends. Even after they are gone, you will suffer some kind of unnecessary guilt. It’s a cycle than cannot end until you end it. Release yourself from their belief systems and you may have chance at something some people call happiness. 🌻
I just had a trying day receiving a lot of insults from my parents and getting hit, it's really crazy to get this notification right after I wake up...
I'm so sorry you're going through this-it takes so much strength to face something so difficult. Please remember that none of this is your fault, and you don’t deserve to be treated this way. If you can, reach out to someone you trust or a support service for help. You’re not alone, and there are people who care about your safety and well-being. 💛
That's really sweet of you, but I can't talk about it sadly, It can put my parents in trouble and I've already gone to court because I had talked about it but I'm stuck between the fear of talking about it and the determination to protect myself, my parents put a lot of pressure on me not to "talk about it" or at least talk about it without making them blame for their actions
@@Ereh_the_potatoyou should not have to worry about protecting them, they should be the ones protecting you and keeping you safe and happy. Please get help
Ereh the potato, I have similar issues to you, I personally struggle with depression, anxiety, panic attacks, low self esteem, and toxic shame. I envy your situation, for I would rather be in your shoes than mine. 😢
I often have flashbacks of traumatic events and then I forget them a few hours or days later. It was only recently that I remembered 3 things and didn’t forget... as much as forgetting this stuff sucks, it’s also a lot easier to handle emotionally.
This made me cry watching this... I could just never control my emotions when it came to being really sad about something, really happy, or just feeling unmotivated all the time.. Especially when I truly like someone I can't control my feelings of being overjoyed and a sense of relief while thinking to myself "Wow someone that actually cares" when they show signs of being caring, loving, and etc. But when they show these signs and then backstab me with a broken heart, I feel like the cycle repeats itself... As I try to push past all of it and still hope that there are caring people out there.
Oh my, Thank you for making a video on this topic. I feel like I've been abused both physically and emotionally by my parents, but because of their brainwashing, I often doubt myself. Nobody deserves violence. I wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy.
I am in the same situation. You should keep in mind the DARVO tactics they use and it will be easier to realize they are actively manipulating you. You weren't the one who broke them, and you are not responsible for their feelings, no matter what they say. They're the ones who broke you, you're not at fault, especially if they incited reactive abuse.You don't owe them anything, and you are allowed to talk about your experiences. If they didn't want to seen in a bad light, they shouldn't have done. It's not your job to protect their reputation. DENY/DOWNPLAY your emotions and memory. Watch out for gaslighting and dissmissive statements. ATTACK/ANGER by using real or implied physical/verbal abuse threats to reassert dominace and power. If the above don't work they will resort to take the victim role projecting their motives on you. Thereby REVERSING VICTIM and OFFENDER. If anger directed at you stops working, they will switch to attacking themselves to distract and disoroent you. The reason they prey on your empathy is two fold, to gain a power over you in the form of guilt and secondly fish for validation to stroke their ego. Don't be mean but don't give it to their feigned self deprivation. That guilt you feel for possibly hurting them proves your kindness and innocence. An unapologetic abuser knows it will hurt others but doesn't care about morality in the face of reaching a goal. Saddly They will not accept responsibility because to do so would shatter their, fragile mask. But as cool of a comfort it is, I believe you. Thank you for coming to my ted talk lol
RE: You didn't ask to be born, but they bore you. Therefore, they have a moral responsibility to the basic physical and emotional needs. They may try and hurt you by saying you were an accident, but even in that case, you can reply, " I may be a mistake, but I'm your mistake, so you have to take responsibility."
@@GreysonAuctor Aww, Thank you for telling me such great words. I really wanted someone to tell me about the tactics of abusers. Thanks a BUNCH, and invite me again if you have any Ted talks lol. And stay safe!! 💓✨
Psychedelics are just an exceptional mental health breakthrough. It's quite fascinating how effective they are against depression and anxiety. Saved my life.
Can you help with the reliable source I would really appreciate it. Many people talk about mushrooms and psychedelics but nobody talks about where to get them. Very hard to get a reliable source here in Australia. Really need!
Steve_porss1 is the man , I share similar experiences with anxiety, depression, PTSD, and addiction. Psilocybin mushrooms have been a game-changer for me, aiding greatly in my recovery and sobriety.
I wish those were more easily accessible where I live. Microdosing was my next step for my husband. He's 59 & dealing with lots of mental health challenges, possible CTE & a TBI that put him in a coma for 8 days. Unfortunately, I had to get a TPO since he's 6'6, over 300 pounds, and showing violent behavior, constantly talking about harming others. He's aggressive. To anyone reading this, if you're familiar with BPD, is it common to have an obsession with violence?
I have been pretty severely abused but i know it made me a more compassionate person. I want to be a safe haven for people who feel like life doesn't make sense. I'm like an island of truth and rationality in a sea of craziness.
Dearest one 👩❤️👩 🙇♀️BLESS YOU ❤ I feel the same 🤝energy A Force to be 💪reckoned with For those 👭still out there Trying to heal 🙏 It’s what keeps this 73 yr old ♓️ Survivor still Strong and Kicking 💃🏼 🤗Lotsa Love ❤️ 🐯Tiger Lotus 🪷
5:21 the picture of the brain being cared for is so cute! And a great analogy too. Thank you for making this video, it has helped me and I'm sure that it will help many more people now and in the future!
I'm getting too old for a new life, but watching and listening to this explains how I feel daily. I do not have a lot of depression any longer, thankfully, because I spend 2-3 hours outside every day in the sun walking, but the "disconnected feelings" are real, and forgetting to "turn them back on" sometimes hurts my relationships.
I'm almost 60 and I found the answer 8 years ago - complete isolation. And drugs...and don't be fooled - you don't need a prescription to get drugs. Lots of drugs and no people makes me feel as good as is possible.
i’ve been emotionally abused by my parents and abused by others before. i know my mental issues are a result of that, but i could never understand why i did certain things or felt a certain way. thank you for allowing me to understand myself better. i truly love your channel.
You just gotta push thru. No one can break you, but you. Excuses why you cant are just that. Dont think your invincible, know you are. Just keep pushing. Nothing can hold you back but you. When you fall, get up. The past is a relentless bully, and will never stop trying to drag you down. Just know that the past is a ghost, a wraith, and can not harm you. The past is dead and cold, and vengeful. Just keep pushing.
This makes so much sense now. I feel like this. On high alert every second of the day for years and years. Abuse from family, abuse from partners, abuse at work. Abuse everywhere. Then overwhelmed with feelings I can’t cope with. And yes, suicidal ideation, that is becoming not ideation but near reality. I’ve had enough. I can’t live like this. There is no help when I asked for years and I’ve given up asking. I just don’t want to live like this anymore.
Sheesh. Yeah, I grew up with narcissistic abuse and I ended up in back to back to back toxic relationships with my mother, a “friend”, and a church. I still hold to my faith, but it’s been pretty lonely since. But being two (almost 3) years away from narc abuse, I have been SO much better off. But I can definitely still see the effects of the abuse on me.
If you don't have faith, you have nothing to look forward to. My heart breaks for those who have nothing in their life to give them some kind of direction or hope for a better future.
I once worked in a Banquets Hall. Very Toxic Workplace. A Male Co-Worker was ordering me around, telling me what do and demanding I do his work for him. When I said NO to him, he flew into a Rage, screamed filthy names at me, and tried too hit me. Two other male co-workers had to hold him back. When this was reported to HR, the HR Manager said I was too blame for his Rage because, in her view, "I should have "Helped" Him. I resigned with anxiety attacks that took a year to get over. Good Grief
same. got yelled at at work. somehow it was my fault. got attacked by 3 women at wallmart one evening and was thrown to the floor and cut my arm. husband came. cops came. cops decided i provoked the "ladies". 3 against 1. i was bleeding. my fault.
I'm so sorry this happened to you. Too often the victim gets the blame. This saying has helped me because for a long time I took abusers shame onto me. "No wrong act of another can bring shame on me"
My dad has been abusing me ever since I was 4. Throughout the years, he has always justified his abuse and for years I thought being bruised was normal. I do these strange little things I can't really explain when I'm near him. I'm afraid of eating and even being in the same room as him. He always wonders why I don't talk to him, ask questions about life or anything in general, or even ask him to buy something for me. For some reason I do these little twitches whenever I'm talking to him, and he notices this and assumes that I did something wrong, he would always threaten to knock my teeth out, so whenever he talks to me, I have to actually focus on not making any sudden twitches while talking to him. I always isolate myself in my room, I want to rot in bed but he'll just abuse me because of it. I feel like he has control of me like I'm his puppet, he also watches me sometimes and I can see him in my peripheral and it makes me uncomfortable, I can't even smile without him making a big deal out of it. He always thinks I'm up to no good. I feel like I'll never escape this household, I feel like I'm in a prison. He just doesn't get me at all, all those years and he still doesn't know why I don't really connect with him. I'm not really scared of anyone else but him. I see everyone else with normal families and it makes me jealous and sad that mine is so dysfunctional. I wish I had a normal life but this is the reality I'm faced with. I try to escape reality with social media and it helps, but I always come back to reality. There's just so many horrible things he's done to me, I can't even tell anyone because he could get into serious trouble. I just want to move away and live my life in peace. I just had to get this off my chest
It's gonna be alright. You've already done half of the work by figuring out what the problem is and being honest with yourself. You even figured out what the solution is. That's amazing. Now stay focused on this goal. To move out and be ok with yourself. You can do it.
Your situation is same as mine in the past, what made my life completely change was scientific thinking and science mindset which made me see the world from an entirely new perspective, it helped me with social anxiety and a lot of things because you start to understand the science behind it and how humans work and stuff and the actual fundamental reality of the universe. It's not like it changed my surroundings my family is still the same and behaving the same and I don't expect them to change because they way too negative and I will hate them forever for making me go through these things but I just simply care for more important stuff in my life now. You don't need to go much deeper in science like I did but still a scientific perspective might help and understanding human nature
As someone that has experienced a lot abuse this video is spot on. Im in my 40s and have severe anxiety, and memory loss. One of my abusers walked away scott free after I locked up in court and couldn't speak. I have trouble like this all the time in just have conversations with people. My anxiety kicks in and I can't speak full sentences.
My parents abuse me a lot and I have had a history of sexual abuse too. I have had instances of my friends bullying me as a kid and bad self esteem... Yes I did get eating disorders and habits of SH. The fact that I try hard to study and keep up with my grades drains me up emotionally. I am unable to completely open up to anyone, this video definitely helped me, I would try to fix my mental health and seek more self care in the future. Thanks for reading
The fact you're able to acknowledge the horrors you've faced is a huge step taken by you, and I'm so proud you were able to take this step already! Keep pushing forward my love, and if you ever come across difficulties, there are so many people that will help you out! You can do this! Stay strong
@@l.i.s.x.x went through the same thing, was sexually abused by a classmate back at 6, lost my grandma at 7 due to a stroke (she took care of me while my mom was working so I considered her my second mother) and no one did much helping me deal with the grief, all of that while being bullied until 11 or 12 when COVID hit. I got the eating disorders but my metabolism was faster than most other people so my parents never noticed, I started getting more explosive, and easier to explode in anger too. There's been some points where I would punch myself just from hatred and all of that stuff that I couldn't talk about. But knowing myself, probably I'll try to just not mind it since last time I went to psychologist, I felt like she didn't listen cause she would just do an "uhum" affirming noise and not talk about what I could do to fix those issues
You are a survivor. You have been through so much trauma. You are worthy of so much admiration.I hope you are able to break through and make a happy life for yourself . Sending you love dear soul. You are precious and deserving of love. ❤❤❤
Veteran of all types of abuse here. Cptsd. I cant work and my brain doesn’t work properly. I am a mum and I gained custody despite having A&D on top. I wish that healthy boundaries were taught in school. But parental abuse and suffering trauma in childhood makes it very hard to filter emotions and standards. What you learnt as a young child you accepted. This is part of the mess that creates your brain, leaving you-open to having few boundaries as an adult. So the cycle continues…. 😢
How do you… i mean… how do you get a job? Because i can’t, i just…can’t keep a job more then 2 3 months… I know that i find only toxic jobs where people are treating each other horrible, narcissist, very toxic behavior, a lot of anger issues and stuff like that… And that only brings me back to…my childhood. The exact same picture that i can’t escape from. And don’t know how.
I'm glad this came up on my phone! I'm in the middle of a situation like what you posted. I sent it to myself so I could go back over it again and again. It's been a nightmare!!
As someone who holds a deep grudge at my abuser (who I still live with and isn't taking accountability why I became just a hollow shell of my past self.) i always thought something has changed deep within me, now I fully understand how my brain re-wired everything from all the yelling and the past physical scars that was inflicted into me when I was younger.
I’ve got bullied due to schizophrenia and I still have to hear my bullies in my head talking about how ugly I am. I get verbally abused and physically abused. I can see them hitting me it make me scared to be around people.
I'm so sorry. Nobody deserves that. My mom and her brother, who recently passed, are schizophrenic, and my uncle was ignored by the family. He had the BEST HEART. He had nothing but was the most generous. You are wonderful and brave!
@@xenaturner1244 i feel you. I was bullied at a young age and no matter how thin I get, my brain still tells me I'm fat, and my mind tells me I'm dumb (despite grades, scholarships, what other people tell me). In my experience, it takes a LOT of conscious effort to rewire your brain. WORTH IT. But I always have to be aware of how I'm talking to myself and if my feelings are "old tapes playing " or residual energy. There's SO much residual energy to release. Somatic exercises (check the Workout Witch) and yoga or shaking and dancing can help. Best wishes! You are lovable and capable! 💚💚💚
Same here and im Aspeger Autist Adult man ..eventhough i've already turned 28 this year but still when knowing that any case happened in my country where something like bullying especially in school..sometimes it triggers by some words that i heard or seen when reading book or even certain pictures and its like flashback in an instance ..either im in work or just in home doing something or even just laying down in bed and imagining or wondering about someone i consider as friend.. Really Hard for me to explain Further on why my brain are hardly to just simply forget it away in just few seconds I've still remember it was 13 years ago and i was in Middle school years where sometimes i got insulted, Ridiculed even sometimes get throwned and those bullies and their peers just Laughed at me making fun of me out of nowhere as im sort of laughing stock ...untill the school period had ended when i graduated from high school and try to enjoy my life for some through playing video games alot and frequent Masturbation..it went on untill i was 18 19 years old thats when im at the lowest point of life where i want commit suicide but eventually i dont dare to Long story till Few years later i try to find a Job but its tough when Autist like me Having an Interview.. that is why i still hard to get fixed job till today besides i never had a girlfriend either because i having some trust issue to make a Relation with anyone who i just new of knowing them besides i hardly to make enough eye contact when speaking to anyone even wtith my family.. Only last year i did social media detox for a week and Semen Retention keep myself away from doing masturbation for a month ..i managed but i failed to when i fell into Temptation .. Fast Forward in here I Tried to move on Completely and Totally and today i can honestly say im better than yesterday once i changed my diet and Abstain from Masturbation for 6 Month already..i rarely feel Suicidal and less angry issue I just Hope one day i will be able to Liberate myself away from all of this Negativity one day..
As a survivor, I struggle with chronic PTSD, ruminating thoughts, paranoia and a constant fear that keeps me on edge but emotionally disregulates me. It interferes significantly when I meet new people. I hate that somewhere in the world, the people who did this to me are strolling without a care in the world; it makes me feel that the world is inherently unjust. Days like this exert a toll on me, because I have to really focus not falling into this abyssal trap while also digging myself out of the depression hole.
There will be a judgement day and everyone will have to give a personal account as to why they accepted or denied Lord Jesus and whether they had repented before their last breath etc. No sins will be left unearthed or forgotten and our God is due back for justice. Cling to Him and feel comfort in knowing we will have judgement day ! 🙏❤
It really does feel unfair that survivors have to experience so much. Wanting some form of justice, or at least protection from it happening again, is totally understandable. If you're a religious person, wondering why justice isn't being served yet can really try your faith. Finding other survivors helps. Knowing there are other people who understand it makes it a lot more bearable.
Survivor here……went from an abusive marriage, healed from that and then was put into yet another one by my adult child’s choice of partner…..now, thankfully, with the help of others, leaving this one next month and NEVER putting myself in that position again!! Shame on those who choose to abuse…….
@@NinakiChan 🤗 We don't want to hide from our feelings, we want to gradually become comfortable with them all. Especially when engaging kind helpful people('s videos) 🌦️🌱
I suffered mental abuse for 1 year, got a break, and suffered for 6 more years in a row. This has had serious negative impacts on my mental health. Even though I’m a teenager and my hormones are crazy, I still think the abuse mainly caused my emotional instability. I’m always anxious, and I quite often feel empty or sad, but that’s not how I used to be. It’s very annoying to feel negative emotions almost constantly.
Tysm for making this no wonder I almost failed last year, I fell into depression, became suicidal, parents divorced, dad abused sister too, friends left me, i went insane, extreme stress because of abusive dad screaming at me blasting music at night, he crashed his car too drank too much, he got a heart attack 2 weeks ago and survived and idk why im telling this sry
Please, Jesus, bless this girl, give her strength and light, and restore her mind. Help her family to escape their abuser and find your peace and healing..
Suffered psychological and physical abuse through my school years as bullying. Longterm emotional, mental, and verbal abuse from my ex. I'm 30 and trying to get diagnosed. These videos really help point out signs. Thank you for making these videos. 💛
My father's constant abuse, along with my mother's codependency, led to a 57 year long tortured lifetime for me. Im the black sheep labeled bad at birth and have never been forgiven for not being perfect. By 18 years, I was diagnosed with multiple autoimmune diseases and kidney failure. My only salvation has come from the Lord and He is all that i need.
As a survivor who's witnessed more abuse in his life than he should have, i don't think its possible to heal. "Broken beyond repair" is how i described it to my therapist.
I don't mean to compare our situations. But God helped me get through mine, and I've been: - Raped 10+ times - Depressed - Bereaved - Disowned - Disinherited - Homeless - Abandoned - Assaulted - Almost murdered 3x - Lost ALL my money, living for one year with ZERO cash - Lost all my friends - Got framed - Was slandered and the victim of a smear campaign - Scared and abused - Human trafficked - Threatened - Been the victim of illegal acts - Without a car - Without a job - In heavy debt - Alone - Eating disorders - Anxiety - Hospitalized - Had cancer - Ostracized - Judged - Been in a car accident I survived all of these things, but my Heavenly Dad took care of me and gave me a home. He got to know me and befriend me and He is now my best friend. I don't mind the suffering I've been through because I healed from it. I'm not angry or resentful over it anymore. I used to be because I thought I'd been abandoned by Him. But since He hadn't, I moved on and am almost 100% OK. I just get upset sometimes because of the after effects of trauma, because not everything has healed but again, it's almost all okay. I'm not exhausted anymore. I'm happy most days as long as I can talk to God. I see my experiences as interesting and I'm positive for the future. ❤️ Maybe you can talk to God too?
I know a man who can make what seems impossible, possible. HE can heal ANYBODY from the absolute worst of the worst circumstances and situations. I pray you come to know Jesus Christ. I promise HE'S the answer to healing. I'm speaking from experience.
You're not alone, my friend. You might not know there are people who have seen worse than you,No one deserves that.. every time you feel the pain, just ask yourself , " Do those people deserve this that you still suffer because of their actions? No, they don't, and neither do you deserve to punish yourself because of being a victim of such evil people. They'll go to hell for this, even if apparently they look happy, someday they'll face their own deeds! You do the best for yourself as none of them importance or value in your life . Remember, Brain can be trained. It will do whatever you put in it!❤
Yes you can completely rewire your brain , build a new self and heal everything when you dig deep and allow the love in your own heart wash over your soul.
Please ALSO talk about neuroplasticity and that this can heal to a degree, that there's hope. Trauma is not our fault, and we can slowly take steps to healing it WITH a support system. I am missing big chunks of my memories and my emotional regulation is a constant effort, I have significant trust and abandonment wounds, AND I have healed a lot in a few years after acknowledging and working to them.❤ We were hurt, but there is hope.
Thank you. This helped me to understand myself a little better- I'm a domestic violence survivor (from my childhood and then multiple relationship into adulthood)
Motivational Speech: If there is anyone out there giving their time to fulfill other people’s needs, I’d like to say to make sure you save some time for yourself. Know who you are, not who you’re supposed to please. Set the right boundaries so you don’t be taken advantage of. Most people struggle with this part because of what’s known as “Fawning,” where you appease others to avoid the fear of getting into a fight. I mean, what even are “boundaries”? What specific ones should I make? How do I know I won’t lose any friends/lovers or family members after this? Why am I like this…? Well, I can’t offer a definitive answer that correspond to any of those questions, but I do know that if you keep letting it get worse, you’ll lose yourself entirely. You will be who “this person” wants you to be, and make sure you stay that way. Your vulnerabilities will leave you exposed to harmful coping mechanisms, and maybe even death…But with the right amount of communication, action and understanding, you will be able to break free. Find your purpose in this life, and keep chasing it until you’ve got it! *I’ll see you in December…*
@@SandyCove143 , You’re welcome! Btw, a specific date for what I meant by “I’ll see you in December…” is around New Year’s Eve. Around those days I will upload a motivational video on this channel to end the year with a bang and kickstart 2025! The more people know about this, the better chance we’ll have to make a difference to better the world!
Wow what a great video 😍 My dad was a sergeant in the Navy and he drilled me at 4 years old I can remember it all the way up to the age of 13 when my parents divorce. I have struggled with many things in my life. An anger was one of them, I can go zero to full bone anger in 2 seconds. Although I'm much better at it today than I was back then. God bless you and thank you very much for your video. I would love to talk to somebody. The poverty strikes me so bad I can't afford to talk to anybody. Therapy is too expensive. And I am homeless right now barely surviving during the cold😢 your video was great thank you
I just wanted to thank you for making this video. I think that people need to be aware of the repercussions of a r*pe or any other kind of abuse. I would like to add that abuse could also bring us to drastically change our personality. Also, please, believe the victims; only 4% of the victims are lying, it worth the cost to believe us Stay safe, it could be anyone❤
As a survivor of abuse, this managed to describe exactly how I feel. I felt this was done for me... Therapy saves lives! It is possible to heal! And awareness is always welcome. Thank you for the amazing work here.
My main issue, and no matter how much I worked on myself, it's that somehow the sense of trust you have for others... it's gone. There's no turning back, at least for me. Even if on the surface I manage to look confident, secure of myself, now deepdown it's like having a open wound that isnt showing. I want to be "nornal" again, trust people, being able to construct bonds but I feel broken.
What's worse is that in a world so angry, no one seems to know what abuse is or see it as 'normal' and its so common place that psychiatrists and psychotherapists are heavily backed up, and they need their own therapists. It can create actual psychological disorders and a lot of people are just like 'eh, nothing wrong with that'.
That’s why I’m going to be a counselor…so I can show people that everyone is not like that and I can be different because I’ve experienced that with three of my counselors…the second one caused me to do self harm…and I don’t wish that upon anyone I know how crazy the system is and I want to make a difference
I really needed this... i was so confused as to why i was going thru the things i was at a certain point and am still struggling with things.. mental abuse survivor here, nothing ever was physical... except for the anger outbursts of them yelling, slamming doors and punching walls... still played a huge part in that mental region. 🥺
Thank you so much for this video. It really hit home for me, as I’ve struggled with the effects of verbal and emotional abuse from my mother and physical abuse from my stepfather. Growing up, I hated myself and constantly criticized myself, hoping to prevent my mother from doing so. This video helped me understand how those experiences have shaped the way I think, feel, and relate to others, especially in terms of anxiety, trust issues, and emotional blunting. It’s comforting to know that the brain is adaptable and that healing is possible. Your message about seeking support and not blaming oneself really resonated with me. I’m still on my healing journey, but this video gave me a lot of hope. Thank you again for sharing this important information.
Thank you so much for sharing your story-it takes so much courage to reflect on such difficult experiences. I’m so sorry for the pain you’ve endured, but it’s inspiring to see your strength and commitment to healing. You deserve all the compassion and support as you navigate this journey. It’s amazing that this video gave you hope-remember, every step forward, no matter how small, is progress. We’re rooting for you, and you’re not alone in this. 💛 The power of the brain is that it is indeed adaptable. We are resilient.
I dont know if someone has said it in the comments already, but I really really need to emphasize: no matter how small it seems, if you think something might be qualified as abuse, IT IS ABUSE TO YOU. Abuse is not just physical, like belts and basements and slaps. Abuse is emotional, abuse is intellectual, abuse comes in many, MANY different forms. Please, do not think abuse is only for those in broken homes with drunken parents or rage-oholics. Abuse can come from loving, peaceful, even caring parents as well. It might not even come from family. Being scolded regularly for coming home late counts as abuse, being alienated from family or group discussions on purpose counts as abuse. Hell, even being side-eyed with a bad intention can count as abuse to some. So NEVER, EVER DISREGARD YOU AND YOUR PAIN AS TRIFLING. YOUR PAIN IS VALID, AND IT IS SIGNIFICANT. YOU MATTER, AND YOU DESERVE TO LIVE A LIFE THAT IS FREE FROM THE PAIN THAT YOU CARRY, NO MATTER HOW SMALL.
Beautifully said. Many victims have "imposter syndrome" where despite overwhelming evidence they downplay the abuse and think I'm not a real victim like other people. But there will always be someone who had it worse but that doesn't discount what you went through and how it affects you.
That’s what everyone thinks abuse is that’s why I thought if I had a scar then maybe someone would believe me people always assume I’m talking about a father or an alcoholic or bruises I feel like women are a lot MORE abusive than men especially because they’re so emotional and dysfunctional they’re just so good at hiding the facts! It’s a lot more affective when it comes from the mother because she’s the one who gave birth to me in the first place
@@danae-rain3019I think my second oldest brother has that he was always the invisible child that no one payed attention to no one fussed or argued with him and he rarely got any corporal punishments like my oldest brother and I he just chilled in his room whenever he wanted I felt like he always got a free pass and it was easy for him at home the last time I ran away he picked me up and made me feel stupid for running away and he literally said, “I don’t know why you want to be so distant from your family they’re not that bad!” And then he said, “well my relationship with them isn’t like that anymore…we’re friends now!” Just like that…I feel like because he didn’t actually have it as bad as me he feels that way but he might’ve developed that syndrome…I don’t know! He judy doesn’t understand the extent of what I went through with my oldest brother…😓
Unfortunately, there are people that can use things like this to justify being abused. "My parents laughed at me when I said I expected them to buy me a Lamborghini when I got my drivers license." "My grandparents told me I was out of my mind when I told them they needed to pay for my college in Europe, even though my GPA rarely broke a 3.0" "My spouse ridiculed and divorced me just because I said I deserved to be in an open marriage" Unreasonable behavior being treated accordingly isn't abuse, no matter how much someone wants to make that claim. Just as being held accountable for repeatedly coming home late isn't abuse, it's a disrespect towards parents and the rules the children must comply with. If you were only giving 5 minutes to return from school is one thing, but if you are told to return in a reasonable time for the evening meal, and you didn't come through the door until you finally felt like it is something else entirely. Some people paint themselves as perpetual victims because they don't want to be held accountable for their own actions and decisions.
Hello beautiful souls.. Wow.. I am a grateful and happy survivor ( with what I think is a beautiful soul )of every kind of abuse starting before i could walk and watching things like this always surprises me that I'm not a rancor, ill willed, mean, uncaring, mad at the world being... And pray that I haven't went through all that I have without being able to help others get through it soon. Until then May all of you stay strong and keep what faith you have! Have a beautiful day and just know that only you can change your reality and that you are 1 choice away from a completely different life!
It disturbs my brain as well it’s because you can’t get over it it could take years because knowing you were weak and vulnerable is the hardest thing to accept when you’re little and someone does something to hurt you it doesn’t just make it traumatic it overwhelms you
That’s what my counselor and I have been working on that I’m no longer that little girl and things are different now and I can stand up to my parents even if it’s hard and scary and I’m an adult so no one can tell me what to do it’s not just something you carry it’s something that’s been habitual and interpreted like a computer and internalized in the core 🤧
I had no idea how much I needed to watch this. Growing up being beaten by my father just about everyday this paints a clearer picture for me and really does help me understand myself better. I was diagnosed with DMD (Disruptive Mood Dysregulation) and understanding that my frontal cortex is damaged really eases some confusion. Thank you for this video and may it help others with understanding themselves and for a better path of healing :)
You just described who I am, it feels like. Maybe I didn't know it, but I guess abuse has really affected my mental health. Abuse has been running in my family for generations, it makes me happy that psych2go posted this video as I relate to it and I feel like it brings more awareness to one another's struggle.
YOU ARE NOT A VICTIM You are the survivor, the HERO in your story. YOU HAVE SURVIVED THE DARKEST OF WARS. BUILD YOURSELF A NEW YOU. GET A NEW NAME IF YOU HAVE TO. TAKE A PICTURE, AND TELL YOURSELF, HOW MUCH YOU LOVE YOU. RESPECT YOU. PLANT A TREE , LET IT GROW WITH YOU. AND LIVE A LONG BEAUTIFUL LIFE , I ONCE HAD TO CLIMB THE LONG MARCH TO VICTORY LIKE LONG DISTANCE RUNNERS , AND FIND LOVE IN MY OWN HEART FOR MYSELF. I ALSO FOUND A NEW FAITH ISLAM. YOU CAN RECOVER NEW SELF . MAY GOD GIVE YOU COURAGE PATIENCE AND LOVE.
I keep reaching out, even telling others I'm in severe turmoil. I am continuously ignored, leaving me with no support systems whatsoever. I have even sought professional help, but was deterred there, as wel.
This vidoe is DEAD ON! I am a survivor of child abuse. I had a really hard time to learn when young. Once I got away from home? I flourished but had all those behaviors mentioned. Still...it is something you carry for a lifetime. All you can do is check and correct yourself and be good to yourself. I am now a productive and healthy. I would like to help young people who deal with these issues.
A few years ago I was unfortunately the victim of gaslighting and I was being told that my parents didn’t care about me and I had to quit everything I did and I was better off without my parents and friends and because I was told not to tell anyone about it was so uneasy and a couple of years ago I started to picture myself walking on a narrow path and the rocks were falling and I stopped and walked back and said there is something fishy going on here and I finally told my parents about what I had been through and I am now on the road to recovery and I see a psychiatrist regularly and I feel a lot better now I got my toxic situation out there and the gaslighter is living a life of hell instead of me
This is actually a useful lesson as well though. These toxic experiences give you wisdom. Tough and Wise people are forged by bad experiences. If someone tries this in future you will see through it.
So many challenges you listed. I can’t drive any more due to reactivity and flash backs. I worry crossing the street that I will lose focus. I can’t remember names of people I once knew before the abuse. But, as abuse survivors, we keep ourselves safe and make a move in the right direction in line with our values and capacities to make the contribution only we can make. You can increase your quality of life. Incrementally, make a commitment to do a small thing. The first move is the hardest.
I was gaslighted so badly the memories that i did remember i shrugged off as dreams and some of my memories only come up when a trigger brings them to the surface. It physically hurts to even think about them and people just watch and, laugh apparently i deserved it. I don't even have the energy to comprehensibly express what I want to.
This wld explain why I cldnt concentrate or even have to remind myself every 30 minutes or 50 minutes the constant yelling and demanding my name every few seconds fucked up my childhood and cldnt functional verbal abuse from my parents. And because of that I cldnt move on or have a good decent dream job because that always holding me back.
My sensitivity was abused and extorted over my life. I have all of these symptoms. I no longer blame myself for "being too sensitive"; I am now very proud of it for the power it holds. I feel very connected with the world. I am just sad that some people are okay with inflicting cruelty because they themselves are not familiar with the depths a human (or animal) can feel.
As November comes to an end, how’s everyone feeling lately?
Good
Very tiring 😞😩😪
Sad :(
Tired but I'm ok
I don't know...I've been feeling a little weird since my birthday, I'm not ready to grow up
"If you're the victim of abuse.....do not hesitate to reach out to loved ones...."
I hate to break it to you .... but that's what got me here in the first place.
@@magentapyramid9245 hard when its "loved ones" who are the abusers. One of mine actually told me once its dangerous when a narcissist has a psychology degree which she has i didn't realize she meant herself.
What loved ones lol, dont have any
@@jon2679 That's why you don’t ever mix family in your mental health journey when they are a therapist or a have a degree involving the mind because it causes an imbalance of power and hinders your healing. The separation of family and mental health is very important when they have been apart of the abuse or not supportive of your well-being or growth, similar to your situation.
Same
@partyanimal9382 I've learned
it’s really super strange how it’s always the good/innocent people are the ones who suffer the most abuse……
Narcissists an psychopaths attract good people.
@@AlternativeHomesteading Yea, that could be since on the surface they come off as just normal people but once u start to know them it just goes downhill from there
Its because they're good? Its not strange its super obvious that they're abused because they're good, evil people won't even think twice fighting back
@ exactly, I’m just saying its strange for sarcasm :/
@OperatorRekohu ok
I was abused emotionally, physically and mentally by my brothers, parents, inlaws and husband. Not to mention teachers and classmates. For over 30 years. I finally learned to stand up for myself.
🙏🙏🙏🙏
You are not alone ❤️🩹
30 years???I hope you are ok now ….I would not take a day of abuse from anyone no matter who
That's quite a bit of people. How is that the majority of people in your life abused you?
@@RT-zn2yd they are usually the first abusers. Unfortunately
Abuse and trauma survivor. I'm always being told that I live in my past cause how it has rewired my brain. They don't understand the impact that it has on someone's brain, and it takes a lifetime to undo
Same & I hate it. No one realizes that it’s all going on subconsciously & if we knew how to be or even act like the happy awesome people we were before that we’d be doing it! It’s something so horrifying that no one who hasn’t experienced it can ever wrap their mind around it. I know I never could have. I’ve got a book on rewiring your brain that’s helped me more than I can even convey with words & I have been through some seriously dark, sick, & cruel things I thought could only happened in horror films so anything that can help me is on miracle level lol
It’s called breaking the habit of being yourself by Dr Joe Dispenza.
That’s the ONLY thing that’s had an impact in the 5yrs I’ve been seeking healing. Oh & somatic exercises is something I’m just learning about & so far it has blown my mind. The holistic psychologist is the channel I found ❤
You have a right to your feeling Trying to process cope then heal I want you to know among many I can relate People need patience understanding
Take as much time as you need. Feel all the emotions, talk about it until you don’t want to anymore. You will get through this and you are not alone
Facts. I still struggle with childhood trauma and I'm 34. I don't trust anyone. Because everyone I ever let in just wants to use me or hurt me. I'm trying to learn to be kind to myself.
omg THIS. My mom says the exact same thing to me when I try to bring up the reasons for my trauma and why I act and feel the way I do. I tried to explain how it's literally a physical change and I didn't even get to finish explaining before she told me to "get over it" ???
"The axe forgets but the tree remembers". It's terrifying how abuse can screw you over and leave you in a closed and fixed mindset.
And some victims take it to the grave...
This video referring "abuse" very broad definition, I'm confused. 😮
Trump's won will cause trauma to left majority? So they're victims of abused?
@@davidarvingumazon5024How are you confused? They defined abuse as in any form from physical, emotional or sexual abuse can mess with someone's mind. Trauma can alter how a person sees the world.
@@davidarvingumazon5024I'm very concerned for you if you don't understand what counts as physical, verbal or physiological abuse. You should know hitting someone is wrong.
I cried watching this. For years now I've blamed myself for going through this
🙏🙏🙏🙏
I'm currently in this situation I pray u heal..
Bless you 😢🎉
I didn't blame myself but I became a blubbery hot mess and I was in continual distress until I was finally told by a priest that I was being emotionally abused. I didn't know that was a thing. This was some decades ago before the internet was what it is now on this topic. I'm still trying to heal from it all.
@websurfer5772 🙏🙏🙏🙏
you can't heal in the same environment that broke you...here's hoping those in need find new places and new faces to support their healing journey ❤
Thank you. I really desperately need to start afresh somewhere new, away from my family.
I'm trying to escape but I'm stuck,I pray GOD moves on my behalf.
I will keep you in my prayers throughout this evening because you deserve to be in an environment where you feel loved, supported, and valued and I'll pray that you get out of the unhealthy environment you're in sooner.@@yolondathorpe8117
In this day and age where finding a job is horrible...it's difficult...
Because no money = you still depend on those hurting you...
@@higherlearning7668 I live in my parents home. I want to live by the beach. I always wanted to. I really don't care if I will be near the Newport Inglewood fault system. Where I live down, I am not far from the monster.
Abuse rewires your brain. When you are being abused, your brain becomes like a sponge and you begin to learn things from your abuser. You may even begin to develop similar traits. Because this is being taught to you. Many abusers justify their behaviour. They will make you believe that it is acceptable. Some can be influential or charismatic. So this behaviour may begin to rub off on you. But at your core, you are still you. You just need to unlearn what was taught to you. While they may need to start again from the beginning. Which is why they will learn positive traits from you and mimic them in front of other people. Because they learned the wrong things. Many of them have an arrested development. They’re not fully developed humans.
Agree tho :(
I struggle with the adult life because of what I lived as a kid. I am fucked up and no one cares
@@dantemendizabal675 You're not f'd up. You have self-awareness. You recognise that something is wrong, which means that you can change it. You can heal from the trauma. You can process the emotions and rewire your brain. You can become better than who you were before you experienced abuse. In November 2017, I was suicidal. In August 2018, I created my first video on RUclips. By January 2019 I was already monetised. August 2019, I had 30,000 subscribers. May 2021, I had 100,000 subscribers.
You can do anything. It all begins by believing in yourself and cutting off negative people.
That's true. Do you know that brains fully rested shows more empathy than a tired one? It tells how your brain actually function really well and not the abusers. They're functioning with a tired brain :p
@NarcSurvivor What is your chanel?
Unfortunately, for many abused people, the response is neither fight or flight but freeze. It's so overwhelming that people just freeze and remain in an abusive relationship until they become conditioned or 'used' to it for lack of a better word.
Very true! JESUS CHRIST saved my soul and only through HIS unconditional love and understanding of who I am in HIM has truly healed and continues to heal me🥰 I pray the same for anyone reading this❣️ John 3:16, John 14:6
That part! What's worse is trying to explain to someone who hasn't experienced abuse only makes it worse bc they begin to victim blaming & that's another form of abuse as well. I hate that I'm "not alone" in this bc I wouldn't wish abuse on anyone. HOWEVER, I'm completely understood amongst other abused ppl!
My hopes, dreams & prayers are for us all to be heard, healed & loved... all the best to you on your journey!
Laugh, get out in the sun, learn something new 💛
@@shaughnegonzalez6814 GOD bless you💜🙏🏼
Sometimes they are just really stressed or it's part of their culture. They can be really sweet and caring. They just have outburst. Sometimes it can be my fault.
@@LilyGuardado-eq7tuabuse can't be justified as "part of the culture".
I really hate how society abuses people carelessly and then blame the victims.. Like what in the hell that pisses me of..
My Personal assistant will yell at me for spending money, then says she would have not yelled if I had not spend money.
Society has for some time now evolved more around hate or hate & exploitation under the guise of love (like handing out "cures" in the form of beauty-products to provide the citizens with the nessecities to fix their bodily flaws where there weren't nessecarily flaws to be found) than actual love/care for each other.
Those who do that display a lack of self-awareness or empathy. They have a habit of blaming others or project feelings of insecurity perhaps due to unresolved trauma & shame or guilt. It's important to practice communication. When things are bothering you. You should learn to open up or talk about it rather than staying silent & suppressing your feelings which will not do you any good in the long run if you want to maintain a strong & healthy relationship with people.
This is it in a nutshell. I don't have a victim mentality but when someone really sets upon you and tries to rip you apart in all ways, am I to feel grateful for not having consented to it? It's on us to be settled within ourselves so that we don't trample on others.
@Seanus32 my problem is I have a victim mentally. One of many things my Therapist and I will work on in 2025. Of course when my Personal assistant and husband stand in my Personal and yell at me about I don't appreciate them, and I am selfish.
Of course God's sister Karma got them
Dude I wish people didn't abuse each other 😭
world has every type of stuff
War breeds War..
The abused becomes the abuser, however the cycle of hatred ends with you 🫶🏼
It's so incredibly arrogant to abuse another person! An obsession with power dynamics.
@@zetristan4525 it's all about having power.
@@Jetsparx373 I could never indulge in this personally. Surely the other person's inner being matters, in itself. Surely my own healthy inner experiencing matters too. Treating the other as a role-player is too short-sighted...🌌
It stays with you all your life. Affects your relationships to form properly. You don’t trust what people say to you. It stunts your growth. Yo let good people come into your life but don’t let them stay. I know, I’m 67 yrs old and abuse is always coming to the forefront of my mind from events that happened when I was a very young child . I wear a smile on my face like a shield to protect me.
63. same.
I'm 68, and I could have written your post, myself! Hang in there.
God bless you all. In Jesus name please fill us with your healing spirit Lord.
Is this why I prefer being alone and would rather not be around people
Absolutely.
💯💯💯💯
I prefer my own company or animals, then being around alot of people.
Lots of trauma in my life, and I highly prefer being alone most of the time. Other people do not understand my struggles or behaviors.
You hit the proverbial nail on it's head. You always hear "don't isolate". Well, I finally did 8 years ago and they've been the best 8 years of my life. Yes, I am alone. Lonely? Not a chance. I got my furbaby...who is not a substitute for human relationships, no..humans are the substitute, sorry, not missing any of that. I live alone, work alone for myself...no contact with those I have to be no contact and no human will ever convince me this is not FOR ME the best route.
I was a victim of extreme physical, verbal and psychological violence and this video helped me understand more of how my brain may work due to my experiences. Many people in my life make fun of me for many things related to my trauma (fear of relationships, awful memory, having hard time being myself, apologizing a lot and being quiet) which sucks
I’m so sorry for the pain you’ve endured and for how others have treated you-it’s not fair, and you don’t deserve that. The effects of trauma are real and valid, and it takes incredible strength to acknowledge and navigate them. Please know that your healing journey is yours, and it’s okay to set boundaries with people who don’t respect that. You deserve kindness, understanding, and support as you move forward. 💛 You're not alone in this.
I've been going through this nonsense my whole life buts it's funny how when your in your darkest hour it shows your true character ever since that day a couple months ago my mental health is improving and I now have the resources to get of very bad situation so I don't really know what that experience us going to be like honestly
When I'm free of the negativy
I went through that and still am going through some of it but I’ve healed a lot and realized that the brain is a great muscle and once you feed it more love and positivity it becomes stronger and easier to control. Once that happens you have real control of you reality. It becomes more balanced and you start to forget the meaning you give the abuse which is subconsciously happening, instead of hiding and emotionally rejecting any type of goodness you are more open and able to receive all types of blessings
You're not alone and of course it's not your fault. I'm sure that you have the ability to heal a connect witg yourself again my luv❤
I have brain damage from abuse by my mother that started before I could talk. When I was around 2 something happened and I was at the bottom of the basement stairs and my dad thought I was dead. I‘be had seizures ever since. I’m a survivor and my mother was the first person I had to survive. The physical abuse stopped when I was 17 and I hit her back one time and threatened her, but the emotional, mental and psychological abuse never stopped. I have forgiven her, but I will forever have issues due to her abuse.
Nothing like a toxic relationship to mess a person up
I hope you can or have broken free of the relationship 🤗🫶☮️
I made the mistake of my entire life by falling in love with a guy around 2013. Now he uses every single one of my own words actions and feelings against me and by gang stalking me daily
@JeanettePeAceLoVe can you get a restraining order? That's what I just had to do
I was in a toxic relationship for 2 years. My ex would verbally and mentally abuse me and she eventually got a third degree assault charge for attacking me. I'm glad we're not together anymore
@deL_Zayd0 I am so sorry that happened to u..
I was not once ever verbally or physically abusive to the guy who i actually felt was my soul mate when he placed a felony aggravated stalking charges on me and it was very shocking and confusing and I was deeply upset and hurt and distraught by the entire situation.
Now he stalking me and has my home rigged with hidden cameras and I can't prove anything and nobody will help me out.
I don't care about any of this situation anymore and I don't want anything else to do with him or anybody else.
I just really want to be left alone and have my life to myself by myself and live in peace
If anyone reading this during the holiday season and struggle with this time of year you are not alone. My ex who was an abuser would turn into a full on demon during the holidays. If you are not in the holiday spirit due to loss or abuse or just not interested you are not weird or alone. I don't find joy in the corny Christmas movies and the same music over and over. I rather just find peace with a handful of good people with no wild festivities. The horrible person is out of my life now yet the scars remain. Luckily, I am past the fight or flight which took YEARS to regain but I got there! You can too! Sending healing wishes to whomever may need to hear! xx
Thank you! I can only remember a handful of holidays that were barely tolerable as a kid. I try to do my best to GIVE, but avoid the actual time spent there.
If that makes sense. I’m happier eating a salad and a piece of salmon watching the Gilmore Girls in my pajamas and yapping on the phone in my cave.
This year I don’t have my own cave…. So I have to deal with this thing.
I might just make up some ‘errands’ I forgot to do, get in my jeep and bail… ALONE!
✨🥰🙏🕊🌹💫❄️✨
Don't Blame Demon. Your Ex Must Have Been 'Religious ' And on That Context, Saw Abusing You As Birthright
@@OfficeOffice-d3p I do not understand your response. What do you mean "don blame demon"? That is what his behavior tuned into. He was not religious. ( born into a Catholic household but not practicing himself). Not sure about your point. He was an evil person when mixed with the stress of the holidays ( for whatever reason in his head) and drinking turned into the worst a person could be. Hes out of my life so that is a blessing.
Actually I AM quite alone and that is exactly the way I want it. But don't gaslight...it's rude. I have a couple of mental illnesses..neither of them result in a cognitive deficit.
Thanks. I am a nearly total recluse now. I have my dogs for a family and a cat. I stay alone; I don’t want any people anymore. I continue to be remotely attacked; it’s never-ending Hell.
My husband was abused as a child and he entrusted in me for guidance. Don’t give up , so many need a shoulder to cry on 💞
Yes those who are abused never forgets
Hurt people hurt people.
Now you have all the information you need to break the cycle. Go for it.
True but sadly we can’t fix those are broken because some choose to stay broken.
@Kyla21Diamond and for those whom do not have a "choice" because of the systems of ways and means and things?
@@Kyla21Diamond pathetic
@@Kyla21Diamond
Fundamental Attribution Error
Sometimes the people doing the hurting aren't hurt tho, they're actually evil or psychopathic.
I struggle with severe anxiety, major depression and PTSD, as a result of all the trauma in my past, and hearing about how trauma affects the brain makes me realize I’m not broken, I’ve just been through things that changed me. Having gone through a toxic environment at home, I was always on edge, waiting for something bad to happen, and I think my brain just got stuck in that mode. Even now, as an adult, I feel like I’m constantly in fight or flight mode, even when there’s nothing threatening me.
With you there...
You aren't alone there. I have thought and acted way differently than anyone else. My brain is like a hamster on a wheel 99% of the time.
I’ve been going through the same. It really exploded trying to go to college at 40.
Me too it dawned on me it is living in survival mode
Have you found anything that helps?
Avoid toxic people if you can, try very hard to do this, rewire your brain by reading good books, self therapy etc. you got this
Playing instruments has worked best for me to rewire . Not important to good at it just learning helps.
Excuse you 😡
@@jocelynanonymousvlogs5418triggered the toxic weirdo lol 💀
Oh I do! I avoid...humans. Altogether. I highly highly recommend isolation.
@@YourDoomIsSealed
Same
I remember few years back after my wife died, I was left alone with 3 kids. I suffered severe depression and mental disorder. Got diagnosed with cptsd. Not until a friend recommended me to psilocybin mushrooms treatment. Psilocybin treatment changed my life for better. I can proudly say i'm totally clean for 6 years and still counting. Always look to nature for solution to tough problems, Shrooms are phenomenal.
I love hearing great life changing stories like this. I want to become a mycologist because honestly mushrooms are the best form of medicine (most especially the psychedelic ones) There are so many people today used magic mushrooms to ween off of SSRI medication- its amazing! Years back i wrote an entire essay about psychedelics. they saved you from death buddy, lets be honest here.
Hey mates! Can you help with the source? I suffer severe anxiety, panic and depression and I usually take prescription medicine, but they don't always help. Where can I find those psilocybin mushrooms? I'm really interested in treating my mental health without Rxs. I live in Australia don't know much about these. I'm so glad they helped you. I can't wait to get them too. Really need a reliable source 🙏
Yes sure of mycologist Pedroshrooms. I have the same experience with anxiety, addiction. Mushrooms did a total reset for me.
I'm so very happy for you mate, Psilocybin is absolutely amazing, the way it shows you things, the way it teaches you things. I can not believe our world and our people shows less interest about it's helpfulness to humanity. It's love. The mushrooms heals people by showing the truth, it would be so beneficial for so many people, especially politicians and the rich who have lost their way and every other persons out there.
Where do I reach this dude? If possible can I find him on Google
My girlfriend suffers from past abuse and still lives with the family that causes it, I've been doing my best to help her and find videos for her hoping that maybe by understanding it, it might help her heal. She is currently suffering from depression and bad intrusive thoughts as well. I long for the day I can get her out of her situation. Thank you for making videos like these, they really help me help her, and help her find herself. 💕
Get her to live with you. Although it’s not your responsibility.
@@ADcrackerjack That's the goal, we are both underage and she lives far away, we've been dating long distance for several months now. We've been trying to find a way to get her here sooner, but without her parents' permission our hands are tied.
Can I just saying you doing this is so beautiful. I had a partner who’d never do anything like this for me whether it came to the abuse I went through or just learning about my health issues. So kudos to you. Sending lots of love to the both of you ❤
@@-Wave-ol get a job, both of you (if you don’t have one already), don’t drop school (if you both are studying) and keep the romance alive. Best to you two little fellas. Keep us posted.
Wow, you're very sweet. That's the biggest dream of all abuse victims , to have someone who loves you enough to help you and stay by your side.
I pray and hope that you'll be able to get her out of such a situation and live happily together.
It's not just the brain, it's the whole body. Memories are stored in nerves outside the body too. People with bad trauma will shut off communication with their bodies and won't understand their feelings or impulses.
I’m 63 and still a work in progress. One of the times I was inpatient at the hospital I experienced “body memories” which was frightening because it felt like I could feel him touching me as he did when I was a child. I was blessed because I had good healthcare to help me through my crisis. I know not everyone has that and my heart goes out to you. Just never give up!
I dream and redream my sexual childhood abuse at the hands of my Earthly Father who knew his brother was had been and was contuine sexually abusing me. My dreams are ev3ry night pick up same place to continue yet I'm blessed because I don't vividly frame by frame rember exactly what was done to my sexually by my uncle.
Do I have triggers? Two of mine are humming sound of florescent lights and the hum of electricity going into golf carts to charge the batteries. Repeated music same cords played over and over. Ur give me hope to someday not be the victims any more and rember the g9od happened to me instead of both being in the way back place of my memory.n@@Aussiemommy
My reliving abuse in my dreams is very vivid.
Done to me by my uncle.
Do U have triggers?
Thank you for this. My husband of almost 20 years was very abusive and I finally was able to leave three months ago, and although I am already doing so much better, it will still take a lifetime to heal. ❤
I have been violently abused, physically, emotionally, and psychologically by my father from my birth to the age of 10. After that I developed a severe social anxiety and inability to feel, make friends, connect to others, have boundaries,.... I always stayed in this place of prey, always felt like others were bigger than me and could assault me in every moment. Today I am 20 and I finally started therapy, I understand after about 10 years that walking in the street could cause me a panic attack was not normal. Thank you for your video, it really helps. And I hope that all people who got through abuse finally heal from it, and can start to live, and not survive anymore 💞
lovely share about your life ,mayyoongi . 20 minutes sleep in steam sauna each day and visiting ocean/river/lake sail boat ride is repairing me bones and heart from abuse 💕💕💕
How horrible your own dad.my dad died when I was almost 13 It devastated life I started drinking and hanging around the wrong friends which let to abusive relationships
I am so sorry.
Same 😢
Timestamps
1). The brain under stress 0:33
2). Memory and learning 1:19
3). Emotional blunting 2:07
4). Emotional dysregulation 2:48
5). Impulsive decis-making 3:34
6). Depression and anxiety 4:32
Hope this helps you out. Hope you have a nice day. Sorry this is so late. 💙💙💙💙💙💙
Thank you 😊
Thank you for sharing... ❤🙏
I’m a survivor and slowly learning how to piece myself back together in my adulthood. It’s a lot of work, but I’ve loved learning about myself in the process and how my brain has literally tried its best to protect me from the severe emotional abuse I endured. Thanks so much for this video. ❤
I was wondering why I had memory problems recently - I had no idea it could be this!
Trying to master my anger from abuse has been the biggest hurdle in my life.
How do u handle it? Is your anger a part of being anxious?
Still there.
You got this man, stop to take a minute when you find yourself angry and you don't know why. You're not walking this path alone brother.
Recognizing this as a problem is the first step to healing yourself. It may take a good part of your life, but learn something useful and let the bad go. Don't get stuck there.
You’re strong !!
If untreated; the pain never ends. Even after they are gone, you will suffer some kind of unnecessary guilt. It’s a cycle than cannot end until you end it. Release yourself from their belief systems and you may have chance at something some people call happiness. 🌻
I just had a trying day receiving a lot of insults from my parents and getting hit, it's really crazy to get this notification right after I wake up...
I'm so sorry you're going through this-it takes so much strength to face something so difficult. Please remember that none of this is your fault, and you don’t deserve to be treated this way. If you can, reach out to someone you trust or a support service for help. You’re not alone, and there are people who care about your safety and well-being. 💛
That's really sweet of you, but I can't talk about it sadly, It can put my parents in trouble and I've already gone to court because I had talked about it but I'm stuck between the fear of talking about it and the determination to protect myself, my parents put a lot of pressure on me not to "talk about it" or at least talk about it without making them blame for their actions
@@Ereh_the_potatoyou should not have to worry about protecting them, they should be the ones protecting you and keeping you safe and happy. Please get help
I completely understand where you're coming from dude, may a nonexistent celestial being bless you and wish you a merry existence. 😊
Ereh the potato, I have similar issues to you, I personally struggle with depression, anxiety, panic attacks, low self esteem, and toxic shame. I envy your situation, for I would rather be in your shoes than mine. 😢
I often have flashbacks of traumatic events and then I forget them a few hours or days later. It was only recently that I remembered 3 things and didn’t forget... as much as forgetting this stuff sucks, it’s also a lot easier to handle emotionally.
This made me cry watching this... I could just never control my emotions when it came to being really sad about something, really happy, or just feeling unmotivated all the time..
Especially when I truly like someone I can't control my feelings of being overjoyed and a sense of relief while thinking to myself "Wow someone that actually cares" when they show signs of being caring, loving, and etc.
But when they show these signs and then backstab me with a broken heart, I feel like the cycle repeats itself... As I try to push past all of it and still hope that there are caring people out there.
Oh my, Thank you for making a video on this topic. I feel like I've been abused both physically and emotionally by my parents, but because of their brainwashing, I often doubt myself.
Nobody deserves violence. I wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy.
I am in the same situation. You should keep in mind the DARVO tactics they use and it will be easier to realize they are actively manipulating you.
You weren't the one who broke them, and you are not responsible for their feelings, no matter what they say. They're the ones who broke you, you're not at fault, especially if they incited reactive abuse.You don't owe them anything, and you are allowed to talk about your experiences. If they didn't want to seen in a bad light, they shouldn't have done. It's not your job to protect their reputation.
DENY/DOWNPLAY your emotions and memory. Watch out for gaslighting and dissmissive statements.
ATTACK/ANGER by using real or implied physical/verbal abuse threats to reassert dominace and power.
If the above don't work they will resort to take the victim role projecting their motives on you. Thereby REVERSING VICTIM and OFFENDER.
If anger directed at you stops working, they will switch to attacking themselves to distract and disoroent you. The reason they prey on your empathy is two fold, to gain a power over you in the form of guilt and secondly fish for validation to stroke their ego. Don't be mean but don't give it to their feigned self deprivation.
That guilt you feel for possibly hurting them proves your kindness and innocence. An unapologetic abuser knows it will hurt others but doesn't care about morality in the face of reaching a goal.
Saddly They will not accept responsibility because to do so would shatter their, fragile mask. But as cool of a comfort it is, I believe you.
Thank you for coming to my ted talk lol
RE: You didn't ask to be born, but they bore you. Therefore, they have a moral responsibility to the basic physical and emotional needs. They may try and hurt you by saying you were an accident, but even in that case, you can reply, " I may be a mistake, but I'm your mistake, so you have to take responsibility."
@@GreysonAuctor Aww, Thank you for telling me such great words. I really wanted someone to tell me about the tactics of abusers. Thanks a BUNCH, and invite me again if you have any Ted talks lol.
And stay safe!! 💓✨
@@Hyun_berrY-w3j 💕
Psychedelics are just an exceptional mental health breakthrough. It's quite fascinating how effective they are against depression and anxiety. Saved my life.
Can you help with the reliable source I would really appreciate it. Many people talk about mushrooms and psychedelics but nobody talks about where to get them. Very hard to get a reliable source here in Australia. Really need!
Steve_porss1 is the man , I share similar experiences with anxiety, depression, PTSD, and addiction. Psilocybin mushrooms have been a game-changer for me, aiding greatly in my recovery and sobriety.
I wish those were more easily accessible where I live.
Microdosing was my next step for my husband. He's 59 & dealing with lots of mental health challenges, possible CTE & a TBI that put him in a coma for 8 days. Unfortunately, I had to get a TPO since he's 6'6, over 300 pounds, and showing violent behavior, constantly talking about harming others. He's aggressive. To anyone reading this, if you're familiar with BPD, is it common to have an obsession with violence?
Is he on instagram?
Steve_porss1 is the man
ty
I have been pretty severely abused but i know it made me a more compassionate person. I want to be a safe haven for people who feel like life doesn't make sense. I'm like an island of truth and rationality in a sea of craziness.
Dearest one 👩❤️👩
🙇♀️BLESS YOU ❤
I feel the same 🤝energy
A Force to be 💪reckoned with
For those 👭still out there
Trying to heal 🙏
It’s what keeps this 73 yr old ♓️
Survivor still Strong and Kicking 💃🏼
🤗Lotsa Love ❤️
🐯Tiger Lotus 🪷
But make sure you don't be people pleaser my dear. Make sure you are receiving love as well.
The pain of abuse has molded me this way also ..you can become inspired to be better than the abuser EVER was…..
5:21 the picture of the brain being cared for is so cute! And a great analogy too. Thank you for making this video, it has helped me and I'm sure that it will help many more people now and in the future!
I'm getting too old for a new life, but watching and listening to this explains how I feel daily. I do not have a lot of depression any longer, thankfully, because I spend 2-3 hours outside every day in the sun walking, but the "disconnected feelings" are real, and forgetting to "turn them back on" sometimes hurts my relationships.
❤
I'm almost 60 and I found the answer 8 years ago - complete isolation. And drugs...and don't be fooled - you don't need a prescription to get drugs. Lots of drugs and no people makes me feel as good as is possible.
Sending everyone tons of love & healing energy!! ❤❤❤❤❤
I hate that some people suffer from abuse. It’s sad
BUT WITHIN TIME YOU CAN HEAL BECAUSE I DID!
It's heartbreaking. No one deserves to be abuse. I most certainly wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy.
Blame and shame. It’s a life long process of healing 😢
I'm no longer accepting blame or feeling shame. Not healing either but 2 out of 3? I heard once...ain't bad.
Praying for all of us🫶🏿💪🏿🤍
i’ve been emotionally abused by my parents and abused by others before. i know my mental issues are a result of that, but i could never understand why i did certain things or felt a certain way. thank you for allowing me to understand myself better. i truly love your channel.
You just gotta push thru. No one can break you, but you. Excuses why you cant are just that. Dont think your invincible, know you are. Just keep pushing. Nothing can hold you back but you. When you fall, get up. The past is a relentless bully, and will never stop trying to drag you down. Just know that the past is a ghost, a wraith, and can not harm you. The past is dead and cold, and vengeful. Just keep pushing.
This makes so much sense now. I feel like this. On high alert every second of the day for years and years. Abuse from family, abuse from partners, abuse at work. Abuse everywhere. Then overwhelmed with feelings I can’t cope with. And yes, suicidal ideation, that is becoming not ideation but near reality. I’ve had enough. I can’t live like this. There is no help when I asked for years and I’ve given up asking. I just don’t want to live like this anymore.
I feel you, friend
I am sorry my dear. good days will come. Don't lose hope.
I was in same situation before. Pray to Jesus Christ. He will give you the world.
Keep going, please ❤❤
Sheesh. Yeah, I grew up with narcissistic abuse and I ended up in back to back to back toxic relationships with my mother, a “friend”, and a church. I still hold to my faith, but it’s been pretty lonely since. But being two (almost 3) years away from narc abuse, I have been SO much better off. But I can definitely still see the effects of the abuse on me.
I still have faith too - I’m glad you are safe now and wish you the best ❤
If you don't have faith, you have nothing to look forward to. My heart breaks for those who have nothing in their life to give them some kind of direction or hope for a better future.
This makes sense why I struggle to remember. I also have adhd but it’s gotten way worse the older I am
I once worked in a Banquets Hall. Very Toxic Workplace. A Male Co-Worker was ordering me around, telling me what do and demanding I do his work for him. When I said NO to him, he flew into a Rage, screamed filthy names at me, and tried too hit me. Two other male co-workers had to hold him back. When this was reported to HR, the HR Manager said I was too blame for his Rage because, in her view, "I should have "Helped" Him. I resigned with anxiety attacks that took a year to get over. Good Grief
Very sad and extremely unfair!
same. got yelled at at work. somehow it was my fault. got attacked by 3 women at wallmart one evening and was thrown to the floor and cut my arm. husband came. cops came. cops decided i provoked the "ladies". 3 against 1. i was bleeding. my fault.
I'm so sorry this happened to you. Too often the victim gets the blame. This saying has helped me because for a long time I took abusers shame onto me. "No wrong act of another can bring shame on me"
My dad has been abusing me ever since I was 4. Throughout the years, he has always justified his abuse and for years I thought being bruised was normal. I do these strange little things I can't really explain when I'm near him. I'm afraid of eating and even being in the same room as him. He always wonders why I don't talk to him, ask questions about life or anything in general, or even ask him to buy something for me. For some reason I do these little twitches whenever I'm talking to him, and he notices this and assumes that I did something wrong, he would always threaten to knock my teeth out, so whenever he talks to me, I have to actually focus on not making any sudden twitches while talking to him. I always isolate myself in my room, I want to rot in bed but he'll just abuse me because of it. I feel like he has control of me like I'm his puppet, he also watches me sometimes and I can see him in my peripheral and it makes me uncomfortable, I can't even smile without him making a big deal out of it. He always thinks I'm up to no good. I feel like I'll never escape this household, I feel like I'm in a prison. He just doesn't get me at all, all those years and he still doesn't know why I don't really connect with him. I'm not really scared of anyone else but him. I see everyone else with normal families and it makes me jealous and sad that mine is so dysfunctional. I wish I had a normal life but this is the reality I'm faced with. I try to escape reality with social media and it helps, but I always come back to reality. There's just so many horrible things he's done to me, I can't even tell anyone because he could get into serious trouble. I just want to move away and live my life in peace. I just had to get this off my chest
It's gonna be alright. You've already done half of the work by figuring out what the problem is and being honest with yourself. You even figured out what the solution is. That's amazing. Now stay focused on this goal. To move out and be ok with yourself. You can do it.
Your situation is same as mine in the past, what made my life completely change was scientific thinking and science mindset which made me see the world from an entirely new perspective, it helped me with social anxiety and a lot of things because you start to understand the science behind it and how humans work and stuff and the actual fundamental reality of the universe. It's not like it changed my surroundings my family is still the same and behaving the same and I don't expect them to change because they way too negative and I will hate them forever for making me go through these things but I just simply care for more important stuff in my life now. You don't need to go much deeper in science like I did but still a scientific perspective might help and understanding human nature
@happilyevernever4289 tysm
@@spoiledbrat3929 I'm glad I'm not alone, I'll try seeing things with a scientific mindset.
Same as mine. ,we are not alone friend , ❤
As someone that has experienced a lot abuse this video is spot on. Im in my 40s and have severe anxiety, and memory loss. One of my abusers walked away scott free after I locked up in court and couldn't speak. I have trouble like this all the time in just have conversations with people. My anxiety kicks in and I can't speak full sentences.
My parents abuse me a lot and I have had a history of sexual abuse too. I have had instances of my friends bullying me as a kid and bad self esteem... Yes I did get eating disorders and habits of SH. The fact that I try hard to study and keep up with my grades drains me up emotionally. I am unable to completely open up to anyone, this video definitely helped me, I would try to fix my mental health and seek more self care in the future. Thanks for reading
The fact you're able to acknowledge the horrors you've faced is a huge step taken by you, and I'm so proud you were able to take this step already! Keep pushing forward my love, and if you ever come across difficulties, there are so many people that will help you out! You can do this! Stay strong
@@l.i.s.x.x went through the same thing, was sexually abused by a classmate back at 6, lost my grandma at 7 due to a stroke (she took care of me while my mom was working so I considered her my second mother) and no one did much helping me deal with the grief, all of that while being bullied until 11 or 12 when COVID hit. I got the eating disorders but my metabolism was faster than most other people so my parents never noticed, I started getting more explosive, and easier to explode in anger too. There's been some points where I would punch myself just from hatred and all of that stuff that I couldn't talk about.
But knowing myself, probably I'll try to just not mind it since last time I went to psychologist, I felt like she didn't listen cause she would just do an "uhum" affirming noise and not talk about what I could do to fix those issues
You are a survivor. You have been through so much trauma. You are worthy of so much admiration.I hope you are able to break through and make a happy life for yourself .
Sending you love dear soul. You are precious and deserving of love. ❤❤❤
@@l.i.s.x.x 💓💓
@@katiewarren443 💓💓
Veteran of all types of abuse here. Cptsd. I cant work and my brain doesn’t work properly. I am a mum and I gained custody despite having A&D on top. I wish that healthy boundaries were taught in school. But parental abuse and suffering trauma in childhood makes it very hard to filter emotions and standards. What you learnt as a young child you accepted. This is part of the mess that creates your brain, leaving you-open to having few boundaries as an adult. So the cycle continues…. 😢
How do you… i mean… how do you get a job? Because i can’t, i just…can’t keep a job more then 2 3 months… I know that i find only toxic jobs where people are treating each other horrible, narcissist, very toxic behavior, a lot of anger issues and stuff like that… And that only brings me back to…my childhood. The exact same picture that i can’t escape from. And don’t know how.
Well said. There is always hope. With time and a good psychiatrist a person can heal. We are resilient
I'm glad this came up on my phone! I'm in the middle of a situation like what you posted. I sent it to myself so I could go back over it again and again. It's been a nightmare!!
My heart dropped the moment I saw the thumbnail
Right triggering
What i noticed the most is apologizing for the smallest things even if they were not my fault
As someone who holds a deep grudge at my abuser (who I still live with and isn't taking accountability why I became just a hollow shell of my past self.) i always thought something has changed deep within me, now I fully understand how my brain re-wired everything from all the yelling and the past physical scars that was inflicted into me when I was younger.
I’ve got bullied due to schizophrenia and I still have to hear my bullies in my head talking about how ugly I am. I get verbally abused and physically abused. I can see them hitting me it make me scared to be around people.
I'm so sorry. Nobody deserves that. My mom and her brother, who recently passed, are schizophrenic, and my uncle was ignored by the family. He had the BEST HEART. He had nothing but was the most generous.
You are wonderful and brave!
The comments i got still play on my mind, but I still believe I'm ugly and still feel dumb
@@xenaturner1244 i feel you. I was bullied at a young age and no matter how thin I get, my brain still tells me I'm fat, and my mind tells me I'm dumb (despite grades, scholarships, what other people tell me). In my experience, it takes a LOT of conscious effort to rewire your brain. WORTH IT. But I always have to be aware of how I'm talking to myself and if my feelings are "old tapes playing " or residual energy.
There's SO much residual energy to release. Somatic exercises (check the Workout Witch) and yoga or shaking and dancing can help.
Best wishes! You are lovable and capable! 💚💚💚
@@xenaturner1244
I bet you aren’t ugly and neither is @cookieloafres.
Same here and im Aspeger Autist Adult man ..eventhough i've already turned 28 this year but still when knowing that any case happened in my country where something like bullying especially in school..sometimes it triggers by some words that i heard or seen when reading book or even certain pictures and its like flashback in an instance ..either im in work or just in home doing something or even just laying down in bed and imagining or wondering about someone i consider as friend..
Really Hard for me to explain Further on why my brain are hardly to just simply forget it away in just few seconds
I've still remember it was 13 years ago and i was in Middle school years where sometimes i got insulted, Ridiculed even sometimes get throwned and those bullies and their peers just Laughed at me making fun of me out of nowhere as im sort of laughing stock ...untill the school period had ended when i graduated from high school and try to enjoy my life for some through playing video games alot and frequent Masturbation..it went on untill i was 18 19 years old thats when im at the lowest point of life where i want commit suicide but eventually i dont dare to Long story till Few years later i try to find a Job but its tough when Autist like me Having an Interview..
that is why i still hard to get fixed job till today besides i never had a girlfriend either because i having some trust issue to make a Relation with anyone who i just new of knowing them besides i hardly to make enough eye contact when speaking to anyone even wtith my family..
Only last year i did social media detox for a week and Semen Retention keep myself away from doing masturbation for a month ..i managed but i failed to when i fell into Temptation ..
Fast Forward in here
I Tried to move on Completely and Totally and today i can honestly say im better than yesterday once i changed my diet and Abstain from Masturbation for 6 Month already..i rarely feel Suicidal and less angry issue
I just Hope one day i will be able to Liberate myself away from all of this Negativity one day..
As a survivor, I struggle with chronic PTSD, ruminating thoughts, paranoia and a constant fear that keeps me on edge but emotionally disregulates me. It interferes significantly when I meet new people.
I hate that somewhere in the world, the people who did this to me are strolling without a care in the world; it makes me feel that the world is inherently unjust.
Days like this exert a toll on me, because I have to really focus not falling into this abyssal trap while also digging myself out of the depression hole.
There will be a judgement day and everyone will have to give a personal account as to why they accepted or denied Lord Jesus and whether they had repented before their last breath etc. No sins will be left unearthed or forgotten and our God is due back for justice. Cling to Him and feel comfort in knowing we will have judgement day ! 🙏❤
These people who walk around without " a care in the world " will feel Karmas wrath...there is no rest for the wicked.
@@pikeflowedit will be from the reaping and sowing spoken of in the bible.
It really does feel unfair that survivors have to experience so much.
Wanting some form of justice, or at least protection from it happening again, is totally understandable.
If you're a religious person, wondering why justice isn't being served yet can really try your faith.
Finding other survivors helps. Knowing there are other people who understand it makes it a lot more bearable.
@unitedflyers ... "... because I have to really focus ... while also digging ... "
well worded, as I go through that every day.
Survivor here……went from an abusive marriage, healed from that and then was put into yet another one by my adult child’s choice of partner…..now, thankfully, with the help of others, leaving this one next month and NEVER putting myself in that position again!! Shame on those who choose to abuse…….
As a survivor myself, I know ima need to watch this. I just... need to get ready
....?
Hope it went well... Trust yourself, step by step, despite any falls🤗💦🌱🦋
Feel that, been in right this spot... Have you watched it already? 😅 If so, can you tell me, how "ready" I need to get?
@@NinakiChan 🤗 We don't want to hide from our feelings, we want to gradually become comfortable with them all. Especially when engaging kind helpful people('s videos) 🌦️🌱
I suffered mental abuse for 1 year, got a break, and suffered for 6 more years in a row. This has had serious negative impacts on my mental health. Even though I’m a teenager and my hormones are crazy, I still think the abuse mainly caused my emotional instability. I’m always anxious, and I quite often feel empty or sad, but that’s not how I used to be. It’s very annoying to feel negative emotions almost constantly.
"It's not your fault" I think I needed that more than I even knew. Thank you.
Tysm for making this no wonder I almost failed last year, I fell into depression, became suicidal, parents divorced, dad abused sister too, friends left me, i went insane, extreme stress because of abusive dad screaming at me blasting music at night, he crashed his car too drank too much, he got a heart attack 2 weeks ago and survived and idk why im telling this sry
@kitkatmuncher20 Thank you, so much for sharing. I've got 2 ears 1 mouth if you want or need to chat
Please, Jesus, bless this girl, give her strength and light, and restore her mind. Help her family to escape their abuser and find your peace and healing..
Suffered psychological and physical abuse through my school years as bullying. Longterm emotional, mental, and verbal abuse from my ex. I'm 30 and trying to get diagnosed. These videos really help point out signs. Thank you for making these videos. 💛
My father's constant abuse, along with my mother's codependency, led to a 57 year long tortured lifetime for me. Im the black sheep labeled bad at birth and have never been forgiven for not being perfect. By 18 years, I was diagnosed with multiple autoimmune diseases and kidney failure. My only salvation has come from the Lord and He is all that i need.
Only Jesus can heal
I suffered from all these abuses: physical, emotional and psychologial. I have been with a psychologist for a long time because of this.
As a survivor who's witnessed more abuse in his life than he should have, i don't think its possible to heal. "Broken beyond repair" is how i described it to my therapist.
Nothing is beyond repair my friend there are ways to heal the brain ,pls find them ❤
I don't mean to compare our situations. But God helped me get through mine, and I've been:
- Raped 10+ times
- Depressed
- Bereaved
- Disowned
- Disinherited
- Homeless
- Abandoned
- Assaulted
- Almost murdered 3x
- Lost ALL my money, living for one year with ZERO cash
- Lost all my friends
- Got framed
- Was slandered and the victim of a smear campaign
- Scared and abused
- Human trafficked
- Threatened
- Been the victim of illegal acts
- Without a car
- Without a job
- In heavy debt
- Alone
- Eating disorders
- Anxiety
- Hospitalized
- Had cancer
- Ostracized
- Judged
- Been in a car accident
I survived all of these things, but my Heavenly Dad took care of me and gave me a home. He got to know me and befriend me and He is now my best friend. I don't mind the suffering I've been through because I healed from it. I'm not angry or resentful over it anymore. I used to be because I thought I'd been abandoned by Him. But since He hadn't, I moved on and am almost 100% OK. I just get upset sometimes because of the after effects of trauma, because not everything has healed but again, it's almost all okay. I'm not exhausted anymore. I'm happy most days as long as I can talk to God. I see my experiences as interesting and I'm positive for the future. ❤️
Maybe you can talk to God too?
I know a man who can make what seems impossible, possible. HE can heal ANYBODY from the absolute worst of the worst circumstances and situations. I pray you come to know Jesus Christ. I promise HE'S the answer to healing. I'm speaking from experience.
You're not alone, my friend. You might not know there are people who have seen worse than you,No one deserves that.. every time you feel the pain, just ask yourself , " Do those people deserve this that you still suffer because of their actions? No, they don't, and neither do you deserve to punish yourself because of being a victim of such evil people. They'll go to hell for this, even if apparently they look happy, someday they'll face their own deeds! You do the best for yourself as none of them importance or value in your life . Remember, Brain can be trained. It will do whatever you put in it!❤
All i want to say is thank you. I never felt more heard or understood when I read your comment.
Physical/emotional/sexual abuse and torture for 9 years from age 16 on for 9 years RUINED my entire life
Your still alive 😊 you can completely change your life for miracles
Did you live in NJ?
Yes you can completely rewire your brain , build a new self and heal everything when you dig deep and allow the love in your own heart wash over your soul.
i also suffer from not thinking clearly, everything of this video is relatable
Please ALSO talk about neuroplasticity and that this can heal to a degree, that there's hope. Trauma is not our fault, and we can slowly take steps to healing it WITH a support system.
I am missing big chunks of my memories and my emotional regulation is a constant effort, I have significant trust and abandonment wounds, AND I have healed a lot in a few years after acknowledging and working to them.❤
We were hurt, but there is hope.
Thank you. This helped me to understand myself a little better- I'm a domestic violence survivor (from my childhood and then multiple relationship into adulthood)
This made me tear up😢I love this channel🩷
With the voice of the real Amanda Silvera🤗🤗
@@zetristan4525 🥰😍😘
Motivational Speech:
If there is anyone out there giving their time to fulfill other people’s needs, I’d like to say to make sure you save some time for yourself. Know who you are, not who you’re supposed to please. Set the right boundaries so you don’t be taken advantage of. Most people struggle with this part because of what’s known as “Fawning,” where you appease others to avoid the fear of getting into a fight. I mean, what even are “boundaries”? What specific ones should I make? How do I know I won’t lose any friends/lovers or family members after this? Why am I like this…? Well, I can’t offer a definitive answer that correspond to any of those questions, but I do know that if you keep letting it get worse, you’ll lose yourself entirely. You will be who “this person” wants you to be, and make sure you stay that way. Your vulnerabilities will leave you exposed to harmful coping mechanisms, and maybe even death…But with the right amount of communication, action and understanding, you will be able to break free. Find your purpose in this life, and keep chasing it until you’ve got it!
*I’ll see you in December…*
This is spot on. Thank you for calling this out. XOXO
@@SandyCove143 , You’re welcome! Btw, a specific date for what I meant by “I’ll see you in December…” is around New Year’s Eve. Around those days I will upload a motivational video on this channel to end the year with a bang and kickstart 2025! The more people know about this, the better chance we’ll have to make a difference to better the world!
Wow what a great video 😍
My dad was a sergeant in the Navy and he drilled me at 4 years old I can remember it all the way up to the age of 13 when my parents divorce. I have struggled with many things in my life. An anger was one of them, I can go zero to full bone anger in 2 seconds. Although I'm much better at it today than I was back then. God bless you and thank you very much for your video. I would love to talk to somebody. The poverty strikes me so bad I can't afford to talk to anybody. Therapy is too expensive. And I am homeless right now barely surviving during the cold😢 your video was great thank you
I just wanted to thank you for making this video. I think that people need to be aware of the repercussions of a r*pe or any other kind of abuse. I would like to add that abuse could also bring us to drastically change our personality. Also, please, believe the victims; only 4% of the victims are lying, it worth the cost to believe us
Stay safe, it could be anyone❤
As a survivor of abuse, this managed to describe exactly how I feel. I felt this was done for me... Therapy saves lives! It is possible to heal! And awareness is always welcome. Thank you for the amazing work here.
My main issue, and no matter how much I worked on myself, it's that somehow the sense of trust you have for others... it's gone.
There's no turning back, at least for me. Even if on the surface I manage to look confident, secure of myself, now deepdown it's like having a open wound that isnt showing. I want to be "nornal" again, trust people, being able to construct bonds but I feel broken.
What's worse is that in a world so angry, no one seems to know what abuse is or see it as 'normal' and its so common place that psychiatrists and psychotherapists are heavily backed up, and they need their own therapists. It can create actual psychological disorders and a lot of people are just like 'eh, nothing wrong with that'.
That’s why I’m going to be a counselor…so I can show people that everyone is not like that and I can be different because I’ve experienced that with three of my counselors…the second one caused me to do self harm…and I don’t wish that upon anyone I know how crazy the system is and I want to make a difference
I really needed this... i was so confused as to why i was going thru the things i was at a certain point and am still struggling with things.. mental abuse survivor here, nothing ever was physical... except for the anger outbursts of them yelling, slamming doors and punching walls... still played a huge part in that mental region. 🥺
Thank you so much for this video. It really hit home for me, as I’ve struggled with the effects of verbal and emotional abuse from my mother and physical abuse from my stepfather. Growing up, I hated myself and constantly criticized myself, hoping to prevent my mother from doing so. This video helped me understand how those experiences have shaped the way I think, feel, and relate to others, especially in terms of anxiety, trust issues, and emotional blunting. It’s comforting to know that the brain is adaptable and that healing is possible. Your message about seeking support and not blaming oneself really resonated with me. I’m still on my healing journey, but this video gave me a lot of hope. Thank you again for sharing this important information.
Thank you so much for sharing your story-it takes so much courage to reflect on such difficult experiences. I’m so sorry for the pain you’ve endured, but it’s inspiring to see your strength and commitment to healing. You deserve all the compassion and support as you navigate this journey. It’s amazing that this video gave you hope-remember, every step forward, no matter how small, is progress. We’re rooting for you, and you’re not alone in this. 💛 The power of the brain is that it is indeed adaptable. We are resilient.
@@Psych2go Does your vid applied to Left's meltdown after Trump won the election?
I dont know if someone has said it in the comments already, but I really really need to emphasize: no matter how small it seems, if you think something might be qualified as abuse, IT IS ABUSE TO YOU. Abuse is not just physical, like belts and basements and slaps. Abuse is emotional, abuse is intellectual, abuse comes in many, MANY different forms. Please, do not think abuse is only for those in broken homes with drunken parents or rage-oholics. Abuse can come from loving, peaceful, even caring parents as well. It might not even come from family. Being scolded regularly for coming home late counts as abuse, being alienated from family or group discussions on purpose counts as abuse. Hell, even being side-eyed with a bad intention can count as abuse to some. So NEVER, EVER DISREGARD YOU AND YOUR PAIN AS TRIFLING. YOUR PAIN IS VALID, AND IT IS SIGNIFICANT. YOU MATTER, AND YOU DESERVE TO LIVE A LIFE THAT IS FREE FROM THE PAIN THAT YOU CARRY, NO MATTER HOW SMALL.
Beautifully said. Many victims have "imposter syndrome" where despite overwhelming evidence they downplay the abuse and think I'm not a real victim like other people. But there will always be someone who had it worse but that doesn't discount what you went through and how it affects you.
That’s what everyone thinks abuse is that’s why I thought if I had a scar then maybe someone would believe me people always assume I’m talking about a father or an alcoholic or bruises I feel like women are a lot MORE abusive than men especially because they’re so emotional and dysfunctional they’re just so good at hiding the facts! It’s a lot more affective when it comes from the mother because she’s the one who gave birth to me in the first place
@@danae-rain3019I think my second oldest brother has that he was always the invisible child that no one payed attention to no one fussed or argued with him and he rarely got any corporal punishments like my oldest brother and I he just chilled in his room whenever he wanted I felt like he always got a free pass and it was easy for him at home the last time I ran away he picked me up and made me feel stupid for running away and he literally said, “I don’t know why you want to be so distant from your family they’re not that bad!” And then he said, “well my relationship with them isn’t like that anymore…we’re friends now!” Just like that…I feel like because he didn’t actually have it as bad as me he feels that way but he might’ve developed that syndrome…I don’t know! He judy doesn’t understand the extent of what I went through with my oldest brother…😓
I don’t know what abuse is anymore
Unfortunately, there are people that can use things like this to justify being abused.
"My parents laughed at me when I said I expected them to buy me a Lamborghini when I got my drivers license."
"My grandparents told me I was out of my mind when I told them they needed to pay for my college in Europe, even though my GPA rarely broke a 3.0"
"My spouse ridiculed and divorced me just because I said I deserved to be in an open marriage"
Unreasonable behavior being treated accordingly isn't abuse, no matter how much someone wants to make that claim.
Just as being held accountable for repeatedly coming home late isn't abuse, it's a disrespect towards parents and the rules the children must comply with. If you were only giving 5 minutes to return from school is one thing, but if you are told to return in a reasonable time for the evening meal, and you didn't come through the door until you finally felt like it is something else entirely.
Some people paint themselves as perpetual victims because they don't want to be held accountable for their own actions and decisions.
Hello beautiful souls.. Wow.. I am a grateful and happy survivor ( with what I think is a beautiful soul )of every kind of abuse starting before i could walk and watching things like this always surprises me that I'm not a rancor, ill willed, mean, uncaring, mad at the world being... And pray that I haven't went through all that I have without being able to help others get through it soon. Until then May all of you stay strong and keep what faith you have! Have a beautiful day and just know that only you can change your reality and that you are 1 choice away from a completely different life!
It's the "Get over it' that hurts and disturbs my brain. Why is that? 😮💨
It disturbs my brain as well it’s because you can’t get over it it could take years because knowing you were weak and vulnerable is the hardest thing to accept when you’re little and someone does something to hurt you it doesn’t just make it traumatic it overwhelms you
That’s what my counselor and I have been working on that I’m no longer that little girl and things are different now and I can stand up to my parents even if it’s hard and scary and I’m an adult so no one can tell me what to do it’s not just something you carry it’s something that’s been habitual and interpreted like a computer and internalized in the core 🤧
I had no idea how much I needed to watch this. Growing up being beaten by my father just about everyday this paints a clearer picture for me and really does help me understand myself better. I was diagnosed with DMD (Disruptive Mood Dysregulation) and understanding that my frontal cortex is damaged really eases some confusion. Thank you for this video and may it help others with understanding themselves and for a better path of healing :)
You just described who I am, it feels like. Maybe I didn't know it, but I guess abuse has really affected my mental health. Abuse has been running in my family for generations, it makes me happy that psych2go posted this video as I relate to it and I feel like it brings more awareness to one another's struggle.
The strangest thing is people telling you not to come across as the victim (or play the victim card)….. but the problem is the you ARE the victim…..
YOU ARE NOT A VICTIM
You are the survivor, the HERO in your story. YOU HAVE SURVIVED THE DARKEST OF WARS. BUILD YOURSELF A NEW YOU. GET A NEW NAME IF YOU HAVE TO. TAKE A PICTURE, AND TELL YOURSELF, HOW MUCH YOU LOVE YOU. RESPECT YOU. PLANT A TREE , LET IT GROW WITH YOU. AND LIVE A LONG BEAUTIFUL LIFE , I ONCE HAD TO CLIMB THE LONG MARCH TO VICTORY LIKE LONG DISTANCE RUNNERS , AND FIND LOVE IN MY OWN HEART FOR MYSELF. I ALSO FOUND A NEW FAITH ISLAM.
YOU CAN RECOVER NEW SELF . MAY GOD GIVE YOU COURAGE PATIENCE AND LOVE.
@@marigold9736 as much as i appreciate the good intention behind this i never wanted to be known as a survivor i wanted to be known as dead
❤ I love these videos. I’ve been watching them to better understand my daughter’s struggle with mental illness. Thank you for making them.
When you are told you have been abused, that's when you become weak.
Someone wrote that below in a comment.
That makes a LOT of sense. 💯
I keep reaching out, even telling others I'm in severe turmoil. I am continuously ignored, leaving me with no support systems whatsoever. I have even sought professional help, but was deterred there, as wel.
It's devastating to just be dismissed. It seems to be on purpose.
This vidoe is DEAD ON! I am a survivor of child abuse. I had a really hard time to learn when young. Once I got away from home? I flourished but had all those behaviors mentioned. Still...it is something you carry for a lifetime. All you can do is check and correct yourself and be good to yourself. I am now a productive and healthy. I would like to help young people who deal with these issues.
*Waaaah...I can see how far I came from, but I thank God I'm a survivor!* ❤️
A few years ago I was unfortunately the victim of gaslighting and I was being told that my parents didn’t care about me and I had to quit everything I did and I was better off without my parents and friends and because I was told not to tell anyone about it was so uneasy and a couple of years ago I started to picture myself walking on a narrow path and the rocks were falling and I stopped and walked back and said there is something fishy going on here and I finally told my parents about what I had been through and I am now on the road to recovery and I see a psychiatrist regularly and I feel a lot better now I got my toxic situation out there and the gaslighter is living a life of hell instead of me
This is actually a useful lesson as well though. These toxic experiences give you wisdom. Tough and Wise people are forged by bad experiences. If someone tries this in future you will see through it.
So many challenges you listed. I can’t drive any more due to reactivity and flash backs. I worry crossing the street that I will lose focus. I can’t remember names of people I once knew before the abuse. But, as abuse survivors, we keep ourselves safe and make a move in the right direction in line with our values and capacities to make the contribution only we can make. You can increase your quality of life. Incrementally, make a commitment to do a small thing. The first move is the hardest.
I was gaslighted so badly the memories that i did remember i shrugged off as dreams and some of my memories only come up when a trigger brings them to the surface. It physically hurts to even think about them and people just watch and, laugh apparently i deserved it. I don't even have the energy to comprehensibly express what I want to.
This wld explain why I cldnt concentrate or even have to remind myself every 30 minutes or 50 minutes the constant yelling and demanding my name every few seconds fucked up my childhood and cldnt functional verbal abuse from my parents.
And because of that I cldnt move on or have a good decent dream job because that always holding me back.
My sensitivity was abused and extorted over my life. I have all of these symptoms. I no longer blame myself for "being too sensitive"; I am now very proud of it for the power it holds. I feel very connected with the world. I am just sad that some people are okay with inflicting cruelty because they themselves are not familiar with the depths a human (or animal) can feel.