I skimmed through the first three minutes because it was difficult and revolting to see. Modesty in how a woman dresses, behaves, and speaks is something that holds dear to my heart. It’s true and good 🌸. I wish this was more widely taught and valued in the Black community but unfortunately, it isn't. Instead immodesty, promiscuity, and inappropriate behavior is what’s celebrated. 💔
I agree 100%. I’ve never heard of a black man tell his wife or girlfriend to get BBL, boob job, wear a wig or lace front, wear lashes, makeup etc. they do that for themselves and their friend group. We love black women in their natural state.
Oh really? You’ve never heard it. But do you see it? If blk males get rich, who do you see them pursue for relationships and marriage? Stop gaslighting. These girls are getting these messages from the men who they think are their natural counterpart. You can’t degrade a woman’s skin tone, hair and body then shame her for trying to change it. Blk women and girls should simply stop caring what blk males think about them because the average blk males don’t have anything to offer ANY woman but poverty and single parenthood. Blk Women and Girls should enhance their natural features with proper skin care, healthy diets and exercise as well as cut out toxic people from their lives.
As a Black man who is married to a Black woman and who very much loves Black women the four main areas keeping so many single are: 1. Poor attitude/Lack of femininity. 2. The sheer number who have children out of wedlock and in turn bring other men's children into relationships. 3. Promiscuous lifestyles. 4. Waiting until middle age (35+) to seek marriage and committed relationships. Black women being overweight has been a popular talking point in recent years, but I think this isn't as big of an issue as social media implies There are plenty of thin women who are single as a dollar bill, and chubby women with loving and committed husbands. The four factors I mentioned have more weight (pun intended) in keeping Black women single than any other. I have not been single in a long time, but when I was a feminine woman who was childless and hadn't been with half the town were non-negotiable qualities I wanted in a wife. Black women seriously limit their options by having so many kids outside of marriage and then waiting till they are almost 40 to find a husband. It is sad to witness how normal this behavior has become.
Having children out of wedlock stems from slavery. Mind you, bw were breed just to bring forth children to work on Massa plantations. It's in bw genetic memory to sexualize themselves. Therapy is needed in our communities.
@@ambientparallax2984 Truth be told, chubby (not morbidly obese), dark skinned, and top heavy have always been my physical type. Needless to say, it's not hard to find those physical traits among our women and I always had competition. However the #1 rule I had was no kids, I had zero interest in being a stepfather and my dating years was the 90s when there was a huge push to guilt trip decent brothers into dating single mothers. Having my own children was so important to me, I'd take a childless 6 over a single mother who was a 10 and that was true even when I was a young man.
As a black man who married a black woman and have children with her and divorced her (God is good) and married a Hispanic woman, I have to say that the sisters have fallen behind. The nasty attitudes, selfishness, and prostitute behavior make so many of them untouchable. Of course they are beautiful, physically. But emotionally, spiritually they are rotten to the core and need to be avoided at all cost. Not all ... but "how many rotten apples does it take to ruin the bunch"?
@KingMalakizadakYisarahl Women are individuals and need to be seen that way. Hispanic culture can produce women who are more family oriented. But there are lots of good and bad women in every racial/ethnic group
@@carlosmark9840 I used to think that way too but I've come to realize that the black community suffers from an ego problem. It's the fear of being vulnerable and trying to be so strong that is keeping us in denial. We don't want to admit that we have trauma but if you look at the circumstances of our people, it is obvious that we are suffering from mental instability. Too many broken homes, incarceration, and financial problems. One's life circumstances reflects their mind. A stable mind creates a stable life. The first step to cultivating a stable mind is to deal with trauma and to have self awareness.
Our sisters have been out of order for years. And believe it or not. The absence of black men creates chaos. So while and when black women deny and try to live without and hate black men, chaos will follow them.
@openminded_skepticA ww can be in their presence and they will act respectable, not just a wm. Almost anyone not black and they will change their attitudes.
We rather a proper white woman that's a lady rather than a Black woman that ratchet, as a man who would you choose to handle your legacy.... It's not about color when black men decided to wife up a different color sister. It's about the culture your inviting in the life of your children. You women are too short sided and you focus more on the external because that's easier then putting in the work to fix whatever is going on in the inside. This ain't about us men its about you. Accept it heal and become better so you can receive a blessed good man.
When a white man "Pasta and Lobster" wants them they go crazy! Like they won the lottery or something! They accept white men who are old, short, and fat. Just like blackmen do when they get white women. They also accept Asians the same way. It is funny to me!
One of the black women biggest problems too many older black women ie: 35 and up are trying to emulate the younger ladies behavior. Until that change everything else is mute.
Wow 😂. I'm working with one right now and when I told her to act like she has some class and stop twerking all over the place she got triggered. Said I'm evil. She's 40 by the way and I'm 50 but calls me old 😂. The hypocrisy
The Very minimum a sistah can do, VERY basic standard: come with a pleasant attitude dripping with feminine energy. If she wants to attract Good Black Men for serious relationship or marriage? Starting point is having an attractive personality.
Well done, Nneka. Keep up the good work. You are absolutely correct, and the media does not help matters as well. NBC is advertising for the Summer Olympics, and the black women they show all over their advert are Megan Thee Station and Sha'carri Richardson. There goes the image problem!
One of the reasons I don’t have children is because I want to be married before doing so. However now I’m worried that it’s too late because I do not desire to bring a child into the world as a single parent. Now I’m like man did I miss that opportunity 😩I’m hopeful but it’s hard because I want to be both a wife and a mother.
Men have a little more time but personally i dont want to be 45 plus having my 1st child, even if i biologically can id rather not be a million years old when my child is 20 lol
Thank you for speaking up about this Talaya. This is a major dilemma for BW, given that many of us do not get married at the rate of WW. You are doing things the "right way" yet it almost seems like women who do it the right way are confronted with having to forfeit motherhood (or seek alternative options such as adoption, surrogacy, etc). More videos to come about this! ❤️
This is a good video. I don’t think it’s over for black women if they’re out of order in one area but so many of them are out of order in multiples and this is why no one picks them
I hope that you remain true to yourself. Our concern should be our community and our people. Black women should hold Black women accountable. We are truly the gatekeepers of our families and our communities. We are the glue that holds our families and our communities together, and we are out of order.
Yes. This was a very self aware video and that’s how solve the problems. First you have to acknowledge them and take responsibility/ accountability. 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
My biggest pet peeve is the obesity. Bw swear that there is nothing wrong with their weight and men like myself should just accept it. Bw have always pride themselves on having the best shapes in the world, which was true at one point. Now, they believe that being large and heavy is the way to go. I don’t know, but if I had to call it, it is because they don’t feel like putting in the effort to look their best. it is hard to see that in ethnicities of women are starting to lap bw when it comes to fitness. Those pretty shapes most BW used to have is now seen on other cultures of women. I’m in the gym almost every day, and I see it. Those bodies are top notch, which Really granted and all they had to do was keep it up. Now those best shapes in the world are now called skinny in an attempt to make themselves feel better about being excessively heavy.
@@theblackschwab3561 absolutely. They used to still have pretty little shapes when they were considered thick. Their arms and legs were all huge and shyt. They were more Lady muscle than fat. Now, it is fat more than muscle. If you know anything about women being in some type of shape, the certified thick ones tend to have some degree of muscle that makes the shape, not fat.
Good topic sis, Whenever possible. If you can touch on how many Black women's attitudes and behaviors change for the worst when it comes to getting NEW HAIR. Whether it be wigs, weaves or extensions. Their inflated egos and so-called pride goes through the roof and is apparent. P.S. Please Lord don't let my girl see this post Lol 😂
I'm a 67 year retired Black Man. I work as a Security officer in a high rise professional building...the White and Latin Women are ALWAYS....pleasant... smiling..very Feminine ( in their dress..and softness.. weight.) approachable...Black Women...direct . opposite...in every.. category...I realize White and Latin Women may have less "Trauma"...but... as "Women"...there..is..a noticeable. Difference. V1$
Your intelligence, bravery, lack of any “schtick”, hell even your lovely and exemplary diction. I’ve missed your frequent updates. Much love from a Fan in GA, hope this message finds you in DMV.
Single, never married mothers are the biggest issue. That one issue creates so many others when it comes to dating and relationships. And yes men need to be called out for their role. But the reality is the bulk of that falls on the women. Women have the most to lose when pregnacy occurs. Her health is immediately jeopordized. If it goes left the emotional, psychological, and financial heavy lifting of child rearing falls on her. So it's in the her best interest to vet that man properly. I'd say its her primary responsiblity in a relationship. Marriage is more for women than men. And women need to require it BEFORE having children for a man. And if you think marriage is outdated and irrelevant, then don't get mad at the men who think hanging around to raise a child is outdated.
I remember as a young boy, I used to be in awe of the women in my life (mom, both grandmas, aunts, older sister, older cousins, etc...) I remember feeling I was always in the presence of wisdom and knowledge. Those were women who didn't have children out of wedlock. Those were women who were married to 1 man all their lives. The kids (boys and girls) didn't want to disappoint them. We all wanted to do good in life to make them proud. Any kid in the neighborhood could go to them for advice. These women would be ashamed to be standing next to these females and all of them be called "Women".
The one thing I like about you Nneka, is that you speak well you know how to articulate a sentence. And that is really refreshing for me to see. Because many women of color have bad grammar and for me it’s not appealing. Also, I agree with many of the things you are saying in this video. Good work by you!
I'm a loner at this point,but I keep hope alive!My preference concerning friendship are married women that are into fitness&I'll work with her if she's serious about making long-term lifestyle changes as to eating healthy and working out regularly.
Thank you for speaking the truth about our community and for pushing back against the gynocracy. We must take steps to change the state of affairs in Black America.
I honor and appreciate your video sister. One request is that you use the term, "[most] Black women," instead of just saying, "Black women." This will separate those who are living a life of balance and self respect from those who are not. It can also avoid making a blanketed statement that can unintentionally support an already negative view of Black women. Big blessings.
You can really tell that she is speaking the truth about black women and how they dress and also their beauty standards of the way they are living and also with love and relationship
Nneka, you are a genuine Soul! Are you Ibo, Hausa, Fulani, Yoruba, Ibibio, Calabar, a mixture or another ethnic group of Nigeria? Anyway, keep up the work. Are women out of order because no one expects order from them? When we get right down to it, are men and children also out of order? Is our community as a whole, out of order? All Hands On Deck To Right The Soul Ship!
Same. No malice, no tropes, just honest self reflection. Black men and women need to take a clear look at ourselves. Women one-upping other women, with black men becoming collateral damage, black relationships becoming collateral damage, while feigning a soon-arriving dawn of mass-swirltopia and endless boss women girls trips as the Promised Land has US, all the way fuccd. Major effective psy-op, or just severe yet self-inflicted e-materialism run amok? I honestly don’t know. Love to all my people; right now and forevermore. (Brb, chopping so many onions!)
It is really refreshing to hear sisters like you who are open to listen, learn and understand us. This is something I wish more BW would be open to do. Our interactions with each other had been turbulent for the longest time because most sisters don't know who we are, they go by assumptions. I came across your video and at first I was hesitant to watch in my mind I was thinking "Oh No, What is she going to say??" As I listened to you speak, everything is well thought not a bunch of feelings, everything made sense. You are one of the rare gems, You earned yourself a subscriber.
Great analysis. Glad to hear a woman speaks to her peers with some good, constructive, criticism. You even hold yourself accountable (as well as should do with ourselves).
I am a guy and I stumbled on your channel and I must commend your efforts to lift up our race of women and men for the family. However, you are undertaking a heavy lift as the deterioration of men and woman dating and having families is not just a Black problem. This is a deterioration of all families in America which is pronounced in Black families and male female relations. It is pronounced in the Black community as the deterioration of families is used by the mainstream media as entertainment and by the press as proof of family collapse and by blacks as gossip and we are too public with our problem. No other race does this to themselves, particularly, at our level. My point though the problem your are addressing is an American societal problem. There is not single standard for the traditional family, particularly patriarchal family, that is not under vicious attack(s) in every facet of American life, particularly from the left. While Black people must fight this battle for our own survival we must recognize the grand scope of the problem. While it is largely unsaid, unnoticed, minimally covered by the any media much more the mainstream, white families too are also being destroyed both economically and socially. Every problem we have they have it to but their debauchery and failures have never been covered or presented as entertainment or even when it is, it is presented as OK. For example, they presented single white women as successful on TV in the 70's. The is not single movie, TV show that showed a single white women or single white women with children on TV not to mention an overweight single white women. The point I am making keep up your fight for Black women but know this the problem is not just Black women, men, people but a complete societal breakdown in America.
Excellent point. Even the show that the daughter got fired from for being anorexic. The white woman was divorced and she had visible help around her that wasn't a man just trying to be with her. I think it was Alice? Anyways, you're right.
Great points: The incel crisis does not pretain to black men. The 63% of Gen Z men who are refusing to seek relationships are not black men. The 33% of men ages 18 to 30 who have never had sex are not black men. But in reality the dating POOL we draw from the most is black folks. Typcially people date with in their race 85% of the time. I have dated outside my race and even currently have a snowbunny in my rotation, but the other 4 ladies i deal with are black. Also the audience is predominantly black, and the message is to black folks. Thats why the line of demarcion is made with one powerful Godly word, "BLACK". BLACKNESS is divinity.
It’s Easy to point out all the problems with African Women. However WHEN are we gojng to get to the ROOT of the Problems. We’ve lost the art of Discernment, therefore We can’t Teach our people anymore. First We must SEE the Problem Clearly then we can bring forth the solution ☝️
we love and appreciate you for saying it like it is. We as a people tend to take the worst things about us and bring them to the surface to normalize them. But there is still hope; Jesus is our hope, but we must choose to turn to Him. And on the point of why black women are out of order, let's not place the blame elsewhere. No one can force anyone to do anything he or she does not want to do unless that person is a puppet on a string. The three Hebrew men were brought as slaves to Babylon and were commanded under the pain of death to bow down and worship the golden image and they chose to die rather than dishonor God and degrade themselves(Daniel 3).
I don't support bad behavior; neither do I support putting this crap on social media and labeling it Black Women....There are many other groups with less than desirable behavior, but apparently, it pays to highlight and degrade black women.
Accountability........ men hold themselves accountable and man hold other man accountable however when it comes to women they do not hold themselves accountable or do they hold other women accountable for their actions that's something to speak on
Great video I'm glad you talked about this from what's going on in the world today's black women me personality I love black women around the world keep up the good hard work
Great show. Keep up the great work young sister. The reason sisters are out of order is in response to brothers being out of order. Brothers are out of order because our open enemy has targeted black PEOPLE by targeting brothers. Now we as a people are completely manipulated by our open enemy because of a well-established cancerous hyper-individualism. We no longer understand that we must manage our own collective cultural consciousness. We have been duped into thinking that the group dynamic occurs by manipulating one peraon at a time. That the masses of black people mentally consuming destructive music and symbolisms is because it is presented to the group mind via mass media. The mass mind (cultural consciousness) is manipulated through language,symbols and artistic expression - especially music. The imdividuals think and act according in such a way as to reinforce and perpetuate what has been fed to the mass mind. This is a military tactic used to destabilize cultures. Until we brothers come together in our respective localities and commit to establishing and cultivating self-reliant black communities, we will continue to be easily manipulated by our open enemy. Our open enemy understands completely that perception ans thought proceed from the group level to the individual level. The process of establishing and building our own communities will bring into our sphere of awareness the need to establish mechanisms (language, symbols and artistic expressions) that perpetuate the values and identity of the community. Read or listen to Amos Wilson. He, better than any other, has articulated this psychological dynamic of human existence. Time for us to reclaim US and put US back in order. One People, One Love✊🏿✊🏿✊🏿 Iséee
The way black women can get back in order is to submit to a man and that doesn’t have to be a black man. Everything a healthy woman is looking for, needs and needs to be doing, a man can provide that for her and give her insight on how to accomplish it. Preferably a father or husband. To a lesser extent uncles, brothers, cousins and so called guy friends.
❤Yeah. Removing nails, eyelashes, and fake hair means that at least the woman is clean and mature, not a child, and she is aware and respectful of how others perceive her. After all, the perception that women are aware of boundaries is foremost. Why? Children.
And it saves us about 40 billion dollars a year‼️ that ugly shit they put on is costly and that money can go to better use like the building they say we not doing..
It's a shame. But it's true. I'd say most men avoid them like the plague. They're the lowest marriage group and not even close. Hard to want to sleep with them, having the highest std rate. It's crazy that they fight to be this way.
same lol. we've been trying to tell them/warn them for decades abt their behavior, but they didn't care to listen so now most of us just avoid them or find women in other countries
Good content. The women are out of order. Because the men are out of order. Unfortunately this was done by design. And too many fell for it. Thereby its broken up the households. So its working.
I've tried married a black woman spent a lot of money building a new house, new cars, two kids, she did'nt have to work everybody taken care of, the maturity level of black women chasing something they can't even put a name two it. I don't have the time or energy for foolishness any more, I moved overseas some years back, I keep a high-rise condo in the Philippines and split each year between Thailand, Malaysia, and the Philippines, Asian women are more peaceful for me.
What I really think needs to happen in the black community in America, is black people need to stop only highlighting the most negative attributes of our population. Promote and overstate the positive, because there are so many black women and men in this country that don't condone nor represent themselves in this way. We have to remember that what we speak on becomes our reality, good or bad. You talk it up too much and that is all you will see. Negative begets negative. It is the one thing I admired about many of our older actors and singers and so on. They had class and only promoted positive aspects of what it is to be black in the US. Such as Cosby...yes I know his personal life had issues, but when it came to representing black people in a positive light, he made a career of it. Coming out of the 80s he highlighted the black family. So did our churches and other singers and actors. Now, because the rose colored glasses are gone, everyone thinks it's ok to accept anything and do anything. The best way to do better than people like Cosby and several others in our personal lives is to do better and highlight the best in our communities as being how it really is. Not only talking about people who exemplify the underbelly of our communities as being the majority. It's just dishonest and harmful. A perfect example is highlighting gangster to our young boys, so they grow up being violent hoods preying on each other in these streets. Yes, it was also shown that they end up in jail or dead, but what you highlight becomes reality.
As a black women, I cannot smile at black males I don't know simply because they don't understand it's JUST BEING NICE. Then they wanna stop you, talk ect and overall I DO NOT FEEL SAFE around them. It's always something and they constantly ask for something from you. It's best go avoid them and stay safe. And before the bitter brothas get triggered, I am married and my husband is from Russia. He thinks the way bk males act is WILD, CRAZY and entitled. Great video as always. Good points. Would add that black males don't allow black women to be thinner and don't promote a healthy lifestyle at home in order to stay thin.....Black males also DO NOT LIKE THE ATTENTION black women get from OTHER men -from being thin and attractive.....
I get what you're saying as a black woman but I think its something that can be worked on. It's bad that BM are more likely to get a smile from a WW, AW or HW. Not every man wants your number because he thinks you look friendly. A woman looks more inviting and feminine when they smile. You don't have to smile all the time but the least you can do is look like you're in a good mood. One of the reason I loved my wife is that she's always smiling (she's black and from Miami) and looks like she's in a good mood. She says hello or smile to lots of random people even when I am not around. I always here from random people that she's sweet and "you better not mess up" (when they find out she's my wife). It feels good knowing that everyone see's what I see from her.
I personally do not feel comfortable around black males I don't know. So I am thankful other women are able to give you all the attention you need.@@Tony_Wes I do however smile and am more relaxed around other men who find me VERY feminine. So to each their own, as we owe nobody anything 🙂 My husband receives similar compliments about me as well. They also say they like how I don't give too much attention to all the men in the room. He LOVES IT!
My husband (he's from Russia) said he LOVES that I don't give any other males attention. He also said he's friends notice this too and constantly tell him how good of a woman he has. Not flirty and friendly with males. I say hi and stay appropriate. But this is common practice in upper social circles and women keep their energy towards other ladies to respect their husbands. @es
I can't watch this bc I'm sick and tired of my sisters' foolishness, but I want to show support and thank you for speaking up. 🙂
I hear you brother, it's really painful to watch. Black women have destroyed themselves, I don't think there is any way back unfortunately.
I skimmed through the first three minutes because it was difficult and revolting to see.
Modesty in how a woman dresses, behaves, and speaks is something that holds dear to my heart. It’s true and good 🌸. I wish this was more widely taught and valued in the Black community but unfortunately, it isn't. Instead immodesty, promiscuity, and inappropriate behavior is what’s celebrated. 💔
I agree 100%. I’ve never heard of a black man tell his wife or girlfriend to get BBL, boob job, wear a wig or lace front, wear lashes, makeup etc. they do that for themselves and their friend group. We love black women in their natural state.
No, neither have I but you get alot of them expecting you to maintain an unhealthy weight
Agree. This fits with the unrealistic expectations that they have for others.
Oh really? You’ve never heard it. But do you see it? If blk males get rich, who do you see them pursue for relationships and marriage? Stop gaslighting.
These girls are getting these messages from the men who they think are their natural counterpart.
You can’t degrade a woman’s skin tone, hair and body then shame her for trying to change it.
Blk women and girls should simply stop caring what blk males think about them because the average blk males don’t have anything to offer ANY woman but poverty and single parenthood.
Blk Women and Girls should enhance their natural features with proper skin care, healthy diets and exercise as well as cut out toxic people from their lives.
Key phrase: we do it for ourselves. My personhood could never be about a man, no man is worth that. Get over it.
@@tashboog5458 Been over it
Protect this lady at all costs!
Cheers from Texas!😊😊
As a Black man who is married to a Black woman and who very much loves Black women the four main areas keeping so many single are: 1. Poor attitude/Lack of femininity. 2. The sheer number who have children out of wedlock and in turn bring other men's children into relationships. 3. Promiscuous lifestyles. 4. Waiting until middle age (35+) to seek marriage and committed relationships. Black women being overweight has been a popular talking point in recent years, but I think this isn't as big of an issue as social media implies There are plenty of thin women who are single as a dollar bill, and chubby women with loving and committed husbands. The four factors I mentioned have more weight (pun intended) in keeping Black women single than any other. I have not been single in a long time, but when I was a feminine woman who was childless and hadn't been with half the town were non-negotiable qualities I wanted in a wife. Black women seriously limit their options by having so many kids outside of marriage and then waiting till they are almost 40 to find a husband. It is sad to witness how normal this behavior has become.
Great post but don’t be too humble. Poor attitude/lack of femininity? Gon’ ahead and call it what it is: BAD attitude and AGGRESSIVE 🤷🏾♂️
Having children out of wedlock stems from slavery. Mind you, bw were breed just to bring forth children to work on Massa plantations. It's in bw genetic memory to sexualize themselves. Therapy is needed in our communities.
@@ambientparallax2984 Truth be told, chubby (not morbidly obese), dark skinned, and top heavy have always been my physical type. Needless to say, it's not hard to find those physical traits among our women and I always had competition. However the #1 rule I had was no kids, I had zero interest in being a stepfather and my dating years was the 90s when there was a huge push to guilt trip decent brothers into dating single mothers. Having my own children was so important to me, I'd take a childless 6 over a single mother who was a 10 and that was true even when I was a young man.
As a black man who married a black woman and have children with her and divorced her (God is good) and married a Hispanic woman, I have to say that the sisters have fallen behind. The nasty attitudes, selfishness, and prostitute behavior make so many of them untouchable. Of course they are beautiful, physically. But emotionally, spiritually they are rotten to the core and need to be avoided at all cost. Not all ... but "how many rotten apples does it take to ruin the bunch"?
@KingMalakizadakYisarahl Women are individuals and need to be seen that way. Hispanic culture can produce women who are more family oriented. But there are lots of good and bad women in every racial/ethnic group
Trauma causes mental chaos. Mental health and therapy needs to be more accepting in the black community.
That’s for them we never needed that stuff we are stronger in every way
@@carlosmark9840 I used to think that way too but I've come to realize that the black community suffers from an ego problem. It's the fear of being vulnerable and trying to be so strong that is keeping us in denial. We don't want to admit that we have trauma but if you look at the circumstances of our people, it is obvious that we are suffering from mental instability. Too many broken homes, incarceration, and financial problems. One's life circumstances reflects their mind. A stable mind creates a stable life. The first step to cultivating a stable mind is to deal with trauma and to have self awareness.
Some people are just born crazy period experienced no truma at all to be a horrible person
@@donfuego5716 But that is super rare. Most people are normal people crazy due to life experiences.
@The-Oneness11 I hear u I just believe some people are just no good some people are born evil
Our sisters have been out of order for years. And believe it or not. The absence of black men creates chaos. So while and when black women deny and try to live without and hate black men, chaos will follow them.
BECAUSE GOOD BLACK MEN CREATE PEACE AND STABILITY. LADIES YAW DEGREES CANT DO IT.
This sister is very logical. She is a breath of fresh air. Watch the evil sisterhood come for her.
We men are not worried about them. We got Passports.
Trauma causes chaos.
@@The-Oneness11 self inflicted trauma when BW have children with the worst options THEY picked. But then blame all BM for their bad choices.
That "exterior" seems to change on a dime when a WM is what/who they want. Where they're from goes out the window then.
It's Fake and False Face. They can not hide the true "Black Girl Attitude!" All non Black Men know this for a fact...
@openminded_skepticA ww can be in their presence and they will act respectable, not just a wm. Almost anyone not black and they will change their attitudes.
We rather a proper white woman that's a lady rather than a Black woman that ratchet, as a man who would you choose to handle your legacy.... It's not about color when black men decided to wife up a different color sister. It's about the culture your inviting in the life of your children. You women are too short sided and you focus more on the external because that's easier then putting in the work to fix whatever is going on in the inside. This ain't about us men its about you. Accept it heal and become better so you can receive a blessed good man.
When a white man "Pasta and Lobster" wants them they go crazy! Like they won the lottery or something! They accept white men who are old, short, and fat. Just like blackmen do when they get white women. They also accept Asians the same way. It is funny to me!
MrAmbassador11 Stockholm syndrome runs deep
One of the black women biggest problems too many older black women ie: 35 and up are trying to emulate the younger ladies behavior. Until that change everything else is mute.
Wow 😂. I'm working with one right now and when I told her to act like she has some class and stop twerking all over the place she got triggered. Said I'm evil. She's 40 by the way and I'm 50 but calls me old 😂. The hypocrisy
@travisdale8434 you're evil and old because you want you lady to have respect. Go figure!.
The weight, attitude and not prioritizing love and marriage are the ones that stick out.
Infact no groups of men like their attitude
ATTITUDE is on top of Every list of comments about this critically serious issue.
The Very minimum a sistah can do, VERY basic standard: come with a pleasant attitude dripping with feminine energy. If she wants to attract Good Black Men for serious relationship or marriage? Starting point is having an attractive personality.
Very well said good brotha. Throw in some intelligence and self-respect and you got my attention.
Well done, Nneka. Keep up the good work. You are absolutely correct, and the media does not help matters as well. NBC is advertising for the Summer Olympics, and the black women they show all over their advert are Megan Thee Station and Sha'carri Richardson. There goes the image problem!
One of the reasons I don’t have children is because I want to be married before doing so. However now I’m worried that it’s too late because I do not desire to bring a child into the world as a single parent. Now I’m like man did I miss that opportunity 😩I’m hopeful but it’s hard because I want to be both a wife and a mother.
Same! You're exactly right. Its sad this used to be the norm back in the day(marry before your carry)
Men have a little more time but personally i dont want to be 45 plus having my 1st child, even if i biologically can id rather not be a million years old when my child is 20 lol
@@BluEx22329 yep I feel you lol
Raising a child as a single parent is very very hard .
Thank you for speaking up about this Talaya. This is a major dilemma for BW, given that many of us do not get married at the rate of WW. You are doing things the "right way" yet it almost seems like women who do it the right way are confronted with having to forfeit motherhood (or seek alternative options such as adoption, surrogacy, etc). More videos to come about this! ❤️
This is a good video. I don’t think it’s over for black women if they’re out of order in one area but so many of them are out of order in multiples and this is why no one picks them
Black women of today are lost no bounties its a very sad state of affairs. 😢
I hope that you remain true to yourself. Our concern should be our community and our people. Black women should hold Black women accountable. We are truly the gatekeepers of our families and our communities. We are the glue that holds our families and our communities together, and we are out of order.
You forgot about finances #7.
Ty Sister for telling the truth! Wish more black women like U!❤
Yes. This was a very self aware video and that’s how solve the problems. First you have to acknowledge them and take responsibility/ accountability. 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
My biggest pet peeve is the obesity. Bw swear that there is nothing wrong with their weight and men like myself should just accept it. Bw have always pride themselves on having the best shapes in the world, which was true at one point. Now, they believe that being large and heavy is the way to go. I don’t know, but if I had to call it, it is because they don’t feel like putting in the effort to look their best. it is hard to see that in ethnicities of women are starting to lap bw when it comes to fitness. Those pretty shapes most BW used to have is now seen on other cultures of women. I’m in the gym almost every day, and I see it. Those bodies are top notch, which Really granted and all they had to do was keep it up. Now those best shapes in the world are now called skinny in an attempt to make themselves feel better about being excessively heavy.
You hit the nail on the head bro. The definition of "thick" in our community has changed so much over the last 40 years.
@@theblackschwab3561 absolutely. They used to still have pretty little shapes when they were considered thick. Their arms and legs were all huge and shyt. They were more Lady muscle than fat. Now, it is fat more than muscle. If you know anything about women being in some type of shape, the certified thick ones tend to have some degree of muscle that makes the shape, not fat.
Starting at time stamp 3:20. YOU ARE DROPPING BARS GIRL. I've told my youngest daughter this and wasn't trying to hear it.
Good topic sis, Whenever possible. If you can touch on how many Black women's attitudes and behaviors change for the worst when it comes to getting NEW HAIR. Whether it be wigs, weaves or extensions. Their inflated egos and so-called pride goes through the roof and is apparent.
P.S. Please Lord don't let my girl see this post Lol 😂
I hope I don’t contribute to this when I get my locs done lol. 😆
@@nnekaonyilofor Naah sis your good 👍🏾.
We' re encouraged by this video. I see it as a Public Service Announcement.
Excellent delivery!!
Yes! It is a PSA. I didn’t even think of that. 💯
This sister is what so many men are looking. A black woman telling the truth that black women need to hear.
Also her natural appearance.
@@akendon7260 I agree
I'm a 67 year retired Black Man. I work as a Security officer in a high rise professional building...the White and Latin Women are ALWAYS....pleasant... smiling..very Feminine ( in their dress..and softness.. weight.) approachable...Black Women...direct . opposite...in every.. category...I realize White and Latin Women may have less "Trauma"...but... as "Women"...there..is..a noticeable. Difference. V1$
Their men step up for then to be so peaceful
Your intelligence, bravery, lack of any “schtick”, hell even your lovely and exemplary diction. I’ve missed your frequent updates. Much love from a Fan in GA, hope this message finds you in DMV.
Thank you for tapping back in. 🙏🏾
Single, never married mothers are the biggest issue. That one issue creates so many others when it comes to dating and relationships. And yes men need to be called out for their role. But the reality is the bulk of that falls on the women.
Women have the most to lose when pregnacy occurs. Her health is immediately jeopordized. If it goes left the emotional, psychological, and financial heavy lifting of child rearing falls on her. So it's in the her best interest to vet that man properly. I'd say its her primary responsiblity in a relationship. Marriage is more for women than men. And women need to require it BEFORE having children for a man.
And if you think marriage is outdated and irrelevant, then don't get mad at the men who think hanging around to raise a child is outdated.
I remember as a young boy, I used to be in awe of the women in my life (mom, both grandmas, aunts, older sister, older cousins, etc...)
I remember feeling I was always in the presence of wisdom and knowledge.
Those were women who didn't have children out of wedlock.
Those were women who were married to 1 man all their lives.
The kids (boys and girls) didn't want to disappoint them. We all wanted to do good in life to make them proud.
Any kid in the neighborhood could go to them for advice.
These women would be ashamed to be standing next to these females and all of them be called "Women".
The one thing I like about you Nneka, is that you speak well you know how to articulate a sentence. And that is really refreshing for me to see. Because many women of color have bad grammar and for me it’s not appealing.
Also, I agree with many of the things you are saying in this video. Good work by you!
Thank you for this compliment!
Yeah most black men dont trip on "features" as much as black women think. Most of "us" dont see each other unfortunately
Lies
I'm a loner at this point,but I keep hope alive!My preference concerning friendship are married women that are into fitness&I'll work with her if she's serious about making long-term lifestyle changes as to eating healthy and working out regularly.
Hello friend. Don’t forget that women out number men. So there is high competition for one man.
Competition really isn’t that high, if you’re a fit black woman who carries herself well you get all the offers since that’s quite rare.
@@evaphillips2102 for with an attitude still is not a good option for a man. It’s not just the body my friend. 😊
Lrg pct of em GAY
@@kingmaafa120 are you ? Hamite ??
A decent analysis, Nneka.
These are great points to atart from. Thanks for this perspective.👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👍🏾✌🏾
this is why the black woman is last on the totem pole. and its well deserved
What's more, mind-boggling is their last in every major category like how
Thank you for speaking the truth about our community and for pushing back against the gynocracy. We must take steps to change the state of affairs in Black America.
This is some HARD truth but truth nevertheless!!! Thank you for choosing to have such difficult conversations‼️
I honor and appreciate your video sister. One request is that you use the term, "[most] Black women," instead of just saying, "Black women." This will separate those who are living a life of balance and self respect from those who are not. It can also avoid making a blanketed statement that can unintentionally support an already negative view of Black women. Big blessings.
2 minutes in and i agree with everything you said already!! Great Video love 💯👍🏽
This is a sad reality.😢 It's natural for a non self hating bm to love natural bw. I love a bw who's a reflection of myself.
Well done / well spoken 🤓 it's good to see 🙈 someone at least bringing these issues to the for front for people to consider ???? 🤔 👏 thank you 👍
You can really tell that she is speaking the truth about black women and how they dress and also their beauty standards of the way they are living and also with love and relationship
Nneka, you are a genuine Soul! Are you Ibo, Hausa, Fulani, Yoruba, Ibibio, Calabar, a mixture or another ethnic group of Nigeria? Anyway, keep up the work. Are women out of order because no one expects order from them? When we get right down to it, are men and children also out of order? Is our community as a whole, out of order? All Hands On Deck To Right The Soul Ship!
I'm Nigerian and I'm loving her spirit too ❤
👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿👍🏿
My father was an Igbo man, so that makes me an Igbo girl. 😊
Thank you. What you just pointed out is how we think about our black women and those who don't these are the men black women should leave alone. Peace
Yep and us good and decent blk men are tired of saying it over and over.
I would love to do a podcast type episode with you
Same. No malice, no tropes, just honest self reflection. Black men and women need to take a clear look at ourselves. Women one-upping other women, with black men becoming collateral damage, black relationships becoming collateral damage, while feigning a soon-arriving dawn of mass-swirltopia and endless boss women girls trips as the Promised Land has US, all the way fuccd. Major effective psy-op, or just severe yet self-inflicted e-materialism run amok? I honestly don’t know. Love to all my people; right now and forevermore. (Brb, chopping so many onions!)
It is really refreshing to hear sisters like you who are open to listen, learn and understand us. This is something I wish more BW would be open to do. Our interactions with each other had been turbulent for the longest time because most sisters don't know who we are, they go by assumptions.
I came across your video and at first I was hesitant to watch in my mind I was thinking "Oh No, What is she going to say??" As I listened to you speak, everything is well thought not a bunch of feelings, everything made sense.
You are one of the rare gems, You earned yourself a subscriber.
Thank you SO much for your comment and compliment! Also, thanks for joining this community. I think you will like it here. 😊
Awesome commentary! So honest. Thanks sis, that’s exactly how we should be talking to our young people!
You are dead on. Thank you
Still though you are so beautiful PERIOD! You have a glow that speaks peace. Continued blessings Queen.❤
Great analysis. Glad to hear a woman speaks to her peers with some good, constructive, criticism. You even hold yourself accountable (as well as should do with ourselves).
Your doing a phenomenal job sis trust me 👍🏽
I am a guy and I stumbled on your channel and I must commend your efforts to lift up our race of women and men for the family. However, you are undertaking a heavy lift as the deterioration of men and woman dating and having families is not just a Black problem. This is a deterioration of all families in America which is pronounced in Black families and male female relations. It is pronounced in the Black community as the deterioration of families is used by the mainstream media as entertainment and by the press as proof of family collapse and by blacks as gossip and we are too public with our problem. No other race does this to themselves, particularly, at our level. My point though the problem your are addressing is an American societal problem. There is not single standard for the traditional family, particularly patriarchal family, that is not under vicious attack(s) in every facet of American life, particularly from the left. While Black people must fight this battle for our own survival we must recognize the grand scope of the problem. While it is largely unsaid, unnoticed, minimally covered by the any media much more the mainstream, white families too are also being destroyed both economically and socially. Every problem we have they have it to but their debauchery and failures have never been covered or presented as entertainment or even when it is, it is presented as OK. For example, they presented single white women as successful on TV in the 70's. The is not single movie, TV show that showed a single white women or single white women with children on TV not to mention an overweight single white women. The point I am making keep up your fight for Black women but know this the problem is not just Black women, men, people but a complete societal breakdown in America.
Excellent point. Even the show that the daughter got fired from for being anorexic. The white woman was divorced and she had visible help around her that wasn't a man just trying to be with her. I think it was Alice? Anyways, you're right.
Facts it's the western government laws ECT
Exactly!!!! It’s actually a spiritual experience. The Bible says men and women will have strife . Men and women. Not just black men and women
Great points: The incel crisis does not pretain to black men.
The 63% of Gen Z men who are refusing to seek relationships are not black men.
The 33% of men ages 18 to 30 who have never had sex are not black men.
But in reality the dating POOL we draw from the most is black folks.
Typcially people date with in their race 85% of the time.
I have dated outside my race and even currently have a snowbunny in my rotation, but the other 4 ladies i deal with are black.
Also the audience is predominantly black, and the message is to black folks. Thats why the line of demarcion is made with one powerful Godly word, "BLACK".
BLACKNESS is divinity.
Well said!
Mam.... You're more than One Billion % correct.
When you (pretend not to) know the order, you're out of order.
Great take on a range of topics
Attitude is not subjective.Emphasis on putting your best foot forward.
Great video outstanding observation
It’s Easy to point out all the problems with African Women.
However WHEN are we gojng to get to the ROOT of the Problems.
We’ve lost the art of Discernment, therefore We can’t Teach our people anymore.
First We must SEE the Problem Clearly then we can bring forth the solution ☝️
we love and appreciate you for saying it like it is. We as a people tend to take the worst things about us and bring them to the surface to normalize them. But there is still hope; Jesus is our hope, but we must choose to turn to Him. And on the point of why black women are out of order, let's not place the blame elsewhere. No one can force anyone to do anything he or she does not want to do unless that person is a puppet on a string. The three Hebrew men were brought as slaves to Babylon and were commanded under the pain of death to bow down and worship the golden image and they chose to die rather than dishonor God and degrade themselves(Daniel 3).
I don't support bad behavior; neither do I support putting this crap on social media and labeling it Black Women....There are many other groups with less than desirable behavior, but apparently, it pays to highlight and degrade black women.
15:17 that right there. Accountability is key. Why have a baby by a guy you know you have no glimpse of a future with?
Accountability........ men hold themselves accountable and man hold other man accountable however when it comes to women they do not hold themselves accountable or do they hold other women accountable for their actions that's something to speak on
Single motherhood may not be a failure for the mother but is very often a failure for the child.
As a man I would never tell a woman to smile because I wouldn’t tell anyone to not smile. Always look on the flip side to find the answer.
Pls expand your point about relationships, your deeper take would be appreciated
*Typically **_everytime_** & anytime that the **_head_** is messed up; you cant expect much from the body.*
Is it EVER a situation where a part of their “problems” don’t have anything to do with men?
I just started and point 1 is 100% true. Without even hearing your explanation yet
You’ve nailed it. Now what’s the solution
@byronmcgee4118. That's simple, a passport!🤷🏽♂
Great video I'm glad you talked about this from what's going on in the world today's black women me personality I love black women around the world keep up the good hard work
In the meantime, Smile Accordingly.
Thank you for keeping it 1,000%
Great show. Keep up the great work young sister.
The reason sisters are out of order is in response to brothers being out of order. Brothers are out of order because our open enemy has targeted black PEOPLE by targeting brothers.
Now we as a people are completely manipulated by our open enemy because of a well-established cancerous hyper-individualism. We no longer understand that we must manage our own collective cultural consciousness. We have been duped into thinking that the group dynamic occurs by manipulating one peraon at a time. That the masses of black people mentally consuming destructive music and symbolisms is because it is presented to the group mind via mass media.
The mass mind (cultural consciousness) is manipulated through language,symbols and artistic expression - especially music. The imdividuals think and act according in such a way as to reinforce and perpetuate what has been fed to the mass mind. This is a military tactic used to destabilize cultures.
Until we brothers come together in our respective localities and commit to establishing and cultivating self-reliant black communities, we will continue to be easily manipulated by our open enemy. Our open enemy understands completely that perception ans thought proceed from the group level to the individual level. The process of establishing and building our own communities will bring into our sphere of awareness the need to establish mechanisms (language, symbols and artistic expressions) that perpetuate the values and identity of the community.
Read or listen to Amos Wilson. He, better than any other, has articulated this psychological dynamic of human existence.
Time for us to reclaim US and put US back in order.
One People, One Love✊🏿✊🏿✊🏿
Iséee
Well said. Thank you for this! 🙏🏾
an ocean of fatherless children.
Very encouraging information😢
❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤so truth thanks
Yes, these are all valid points.
The way black women can get back in order is to submit to a man and that doesn’t have to be a black man. Everything a healthy woman is looking for, needs and needs to be doing, a man can provide that for her and give her insight on how to accomplish it. Preferably a father or husband. To a lesser extent uncles, brothers, cousins and so called guy friends.
Keep speaking facts my sister 👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥👍👍 you have a very unique voce we need women like you in the world 🌍
Out of order 😂
And who's been raising these women? I'll wait for the answer.
❤Yeah. Removing nails, eyelashes, and fake hair means that at least the woman is clean and mature, not a child, and she is aware and respectful of how others perceive her. After all, the perception that women are aware of boundaries is foremost. Why? Children.
And it saves us about 40 billion dollars a year‼️ that ugly shit they put on is costly and that money can go to better use like the building they say we not doing..
Yall don't even let the men take care of they kids. Stop it with the man shaming when black men are the best fathers. This is a stat
Sickening to me
I avoid them like the plague
It's a shame. But it's true. I'd say most men avoid them like the plague. They're the lowest marriage group and not even close. Hard to want to sleep with them, having the highest std rate. It's crazy that they fight to be this way.
same lol. we've been trying to tell them/warn them for decades abt their behavior, but they didn't care to listen so now most of us just avoid them or find women in other countries
It’s hard when it’s late at night though 😭
I would take a blow up doll first
Black men that hate black women are obsessed with us.
Lol
The father being present is not a part of the pregnancy plan. These women are being told they don't need a man.
Keep it Up
For 40 years men have been slammed for music that was deemed to be woman hating. Why aren't women who make the same music being accused of the same.
Good content. The women are out of order. Because the men are out of order. Unfortunately this was done by design. And too many fell for it. Thereby its broken up the households. So its working.
2 More out of order subjects, How they Dress, and second their language and how they speak,how loud they’re in the Public..
This is a hot. I love it; straight fire.
Fantastic Words today sis :)
SMILE BECAUSE YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL!❤
I've tried married a black woman spent a lot of money building a new house, new cars, two kids, she did'nt have to work everybody taken care of, the maturity level of black women chasing something they can't even put a name two it. I don't have the time or energy for foolishness any more, I moved overseas some years back, I keep a high-rise condo in the Philippines and split each year between Thailand, Malaysia, and the Philippines, Asian women are more peaceful for me.
My girl is in Catarman, North Samar, Philippines i will marry this year. I will be 47 this year in Oct.
Stop thinknig about black women and fouce on your nonblack.
@@sdneytaco2226 Don't worry about me I wasn't talking to you! find yourself something to do.
(7:35) No guy should tell a woman to smile. Maybe he should CAUSE her to smile instead? If she's not talking to you she doesn't owe you anything.
What I really think needs to happen in the black community in America, is black people need to stop only highlighting the most negative attributes of our population. Promote and overstate the positive, because there are so many black women and men in this country that don't condone nor represent themselves in this way. We have to remember that what we speak on becomes our reality, good or bad. You talk it up too much and that is all you will see. Negative begets negative. It is the one thing I admired about many of our older actors and singers and so on. They had class and only promoted positive aspects of what it is to be black in the US. Such as Cosby...yes I know his personal life had issues, but when it came to representing black people in a positive light, he made a career of it. Coming out of the 80s he highlighted the black family. So did our churches and other singers and actors.
Now, because the rose colored glasses are gone, everyone thinks it's ok to accept anything and do anything. The best way to do better than people like Cosby and several others in our personal lives is to do better and highlight the best in our communities as being how it really is. Not only talking about people who exemplify the underbelly of our communities as being the majority. It's just dishonest and harmful. A perfect example is highlighting gangster to our young boys, so they grow up being violent hoods preying on each other in these streets. Yes, it was also shown that they end up in jail or dead, but what you highlight becomes reality.
We should promote the positive representation and shame the bad. The problem is everyone is too scared to shame the bad attributes.
black women don't want boundaries(integrity) put around them because it forces them to look inward!
Nothing really new here that we already don't recognize or already know it has probably been this way for the last 40 years or so
As a black women, I cannot smile at black males I don't know simply because they don't understand it's JUST BEING NICE. Then they wanna stop you, talk ect and overall I DO NOT FEEL SAFE around them. It's always something and they constantly ask for something from you. It's best go avoid them and stay safe.
And before the bitter brothas get triggered, I am married and my husband is from Russia. He thinks the way bk males act is WILD, CRAZY and entitled. Great video as always. Good points.
Would add that black males don't allow black women to be thinner and don't promote a healthy lifestyle at home in order to stay thin.....Black males also DO NOT LIKE THE ATTENTION black women get from OTHER men -from being thin and attractive.....
I get what you're saying as a black woman but I think its something that can be worked on. It's bad that BM are more likely to get a smile from a WW, AW or HW. Not every man wants your number because he thinks you look friendly. A woman looks more inviting and feminine when they smile. You don't have to smile all the time but the least you can do is look like you're in a good mood.
One of the reason I loved my wife is that she's always smiling (she's black and from Miami) and looks like she's in a good mood. She says hello or smile to lots of random people even when I am not around. I always here from random people that she's sweet and "you better not mess up" (when they find out she's my wife). It feels good knowing that everyone see's what I see from her.
I personally do not feel comfortable around black males I don't know. So I am thankful other women are able to give you all the attention you need.@@Tony_Wes
I do however smile and am more relaxed around other men who find me VERY feminine. So to each their own, as we owe nobody anything 🙂 My husband receives similar compliments about me as well. They also say they like how I don't give too much attention to all the men in the room. He LOVES IT!
My husband (he's from Russia) said he LOVES that I don't give any other males attention. He also said he's friends notice this too and constantly tell him how good of a woman he has. Not flirty and friendly with males. I say hi and stay appropriate. But this is common practice in upper social circles and women keep their energy towards other ladies to respect their husbands. @es