Surprisingly not, as a high schooler that is a shock to me hearing how open people are about stuff like that. As an INTP I related to all but the plan and goal stuff, so yup being alone all day in my room is the ideal
Thinking everyone thinks like you is a sign of a lack of sympathy and understanding to how other people work. Also, as an ISTJ, I also make backup plans to backup plans... its just that I often dont have the time because Im so busy being productive.
Yep! I am the unusual INTJ female and not showing emotions really catches people off guard. Ive had to learn how to make myself express emotions... even if it makes me really uncomfortable.. because other people need it. They deserve to know I love them even if I suck at expressing it.
I can totally relate to this. I have a hard time expressing my emotions in a way that people can understand. And it's also hard for me to show that I care about people's feelings. Usually I'm just like "ok I see you're upset. I'm here if you need me but idk what to say to you."
Never fails lol my everyday life I have like 16 plans for my own true plan. Already on the go. Heck as of today I had to use three of those back up plans 😂
I thought it was normal to have at least 2 back up plans for the back up plan until my classmates back in high school saw my notes and were so shocked about how many plans I have(I have no idea about mbti's at this point). The leaders who got stuck with me as a member also always asks my opinion how to delegate tasks to the members because I have mostly analyzed our group mate's personalities, strengths, weaknesses and techniques to make them cooperative.
It all makes sense now, as an INTJ I actually enjoyed the lockdown and WFH. Most of my colleagues returned to the office after the lockdown, I actually went 6 months WFH and honestly enjoyed the quiet and calm atmosphere
I am also an INTJ and i have to say i spend my whole week wating for the weekend,so i can spend a lot of time isolated with my own thoughts,i sometimes spend the nights thinking about what is going on with my life and what is going on around me
I still tell people the lockdown time was one of my ultimate favorite time periods 😂 and they just don't understand it, 🤭 it was such a fun time for me, while people were panicking I was making pasties and enjoying my coffee time and learning new hobbies,.. I miss lockdown
That’s true with the „IN…“ . I’m an INFJ and meet lots of people on my working day. So in my leisure time I enjoy it much to have time on my own and doing things on my own. I need it too to regenerate.
multiple back up plans definitely resonates. it comes naturally out of obsessively gaming out risks and trying to lower my stress levels by mitigating those risks
I'm used to a hundred things going wrong all at once. So many plans fall apart after first contact. So I always try to look ahead and see what can go wrong with my initial plan, and I plan to mitigate that. It's like playing chess with yourself.
I've only recently started sharing my(27) thoughts with my sister(32). It's nice to form a deeper bond with family. You don't have to keep all your thoughts to yourself, sometimes sharing them with someone close will give you better insights.
41m INTJ here. Well said about other insights. I think for me when you do have a friend/loved one to talk too and you do decide to share your perspectives, that person or group could possibly see a variable or perspective we may have missed Could help us see ways to move in life
As an INTJ, when I was a kid, I thought I am weird and not normal because I am different from the people around me. I tried so hard to be like the others. As I grow up, I embrace my personality and now proud of being an INTJ.
I don’t know if the last one is necessarily true. I don’t make backup plans or I get this huge overwhelming feeling that I rather not start. If it can’t be “perfect” then why start.
Last bit is true, I have all my computer files backup on a hard drive and a backup of my backup plan, of course stored in two different locations and some files are even uploaded to. Miscellaneous cloud services. My wedding video is stored at three different locations.
I literally can spend years without talking to many people. but it's not like i can live without talking for atleast once for that long, we are human afterall. but yeah! it's true, there are most people on my messenger whom i talked for like years ago and never talked again. Just bcz i don't find talking to them necessary. It's kinda rude i know. But i guess all INTJs barely spend time on someone or something that they think are unnecessary for them.
As an INTJ that is completely normal for us because we need more alone times more than other types to recharge Edit : omg this is the first ever time that I've got so many likes on my comment
When I was at school, people would ask me if I was angry, and would tell me to be less serious, whereas I was just mostly inside my head, thinking of abstract things and trying to figure out how some of them worked, and rarely talked to anyone. When I finally got some friends based on common interests and dark sense of humour, I still found it very weird that people hug each other as a way to greet/say goodbye. I got used to it, but still preferred to only do it with my 2 closest friends. What people think of hugs doesn't make sense to me, because it's a very deep, personal thing. As a kid, I always found ways to entertain myself, i still am the same. But people try to convince me that I am not an introvert and that I have to find new friends because I need it (in their opinion). I tried to prove them otherwise, but since those attempts failed, I stopped since it practically didn't make any sense and was a waste of time to debate without finding a compromise. Everyone's different and everything's relative. Emotions. I do experience deep emotions, but when it comes to sharing, I would only share with a specific group of people AND there would immediately be a block, which would result in filtering 90% of what I feel and maybe share the remaining 10%, because I don't want others to be overwhelmed. It's my problem, and the words of support only help a tiny bit, compared to analyzing the situation together and finding ways to resolve it. If I were on the verge of crying, I would hold my regular facial expression up until the last moment where I would end up alone in some private room. If someone enters and catches me in my quiet tears, it'll only make me ashamed and my focus will shift towards thinking of how to escape the room without explaining what happened. I find it extremely difficult to explain the reason, there will might be lots of unnecessary judgement and emotions. So I mostly deal with stress by myself. Knowing this and knowing that I'm about to relieve stress by crying, I will first think of a place to do it safely, without anyone noticing. Backup plans for backup plans for a couple of years in advance.... This thing along with the tests proved me that despite feeling sceptical whether I was an INTJ and being sort of resistant ("huh? they're emotionally blunt, I'm not"), I probably am one of them.
I prefer modular plans. Then i can mix and match to fit the situation. Like, going to Wendy's I'll get a baconator or a jbc if they're out of meat somehow. But ill get a big mac at McDonald's, or nuggets if the store has a problem with IGNORING MY REQUEST FOR NO PICKLES. The point is, modular plans allow me to adapt to the spontaneity of others.
Through first principles thinking you can remove many of the variables. Regarding food, I got a steam oven and reduced my diet to carnivore + fruit and now just eat perfectly sous-vide'd meat every day. If you save half an hour every day from cooking/buying food, that's a whole work month in a year.
Many people over the years have ridiculed me for having an overall life plan. I stopped sharing my plans. Now that I am older, these same people whine about how I have so much money (I don’t). I should have enough for a comfortable retirement, but not enough to go crazy. Question: Why don’t other people have a plan? Why would people laugh at me for having a plan? And who doesn’t have a backup plan?
point 2 I don't relate to as an INTJ but I am admittingly more extroverted than the average INTJ. I did performance arts and public speaking in school and am generally very social (utilizing either my entp shadow or esfp subconscious more often than my ego in social contexts). I crave partnerships and hanging out with others but that's also because I pretty much grew up living with my best friends since my homelife was not awesome so my best friends would have me every weekend and sometimes in weekdays, as well as all the holdays. I'm so grateful to my best friends who improved my life and saved me from depression.
Got multiple different SHIFT plans for just about every scenario. Didn’t realize others didn’t. Had to learn to express emotions more to be a better older sibling and role model though.
As an INTJ, I have backup plans for backup plans to silly plans lol 😆 I just like to think all the possible outcomes and then manage to design a well prepared plan for it 😅
I 100% agree with these. For me, the sharing of emotions can come from my Te Aux, telling my Fi Tert that you are going to waste someone elses time, if you express your emotions.
Backup plan for a backup plan because life can lead us to the most unexpected situations but if I already made plans to get waffles for breakfast, I will get it
I can relate to the last one as an INFP. I like to have back-up plans. Though granted, I don't ALWAYS do this, but it is nonetheless, something I still do. Oh and the isolation thing, yes, haha. But I don't get lonely sometimes. So even just to speak to someone via chat is enough, haha.
Interesting. I see now. I also spend alot of time alone, dom Ni, only the difference is INTJs can go muuuch longer. Two weeks for them two days tops for me and not often...Like a shark vs a dolphine, I need to come up for air. I prefer to speak daily even for a short time. Keeps me sane. Ni does go nocturnal often in both i believe.
3) Yes, I have a back up plan for my plan. I have a back up plan for my back up plan. Actually, have about five or six back up plans for my plan, depending on how my initial moves shake out. But I do realize that'd normal for me, and that everyone else starts having hysterics and flying off the handle in situations that are easily predictable and easily solved. So I know it's not normal, and that one of the things I can do for the rest of the human race is to have back up plans to protect them from easily foreseeable issues. It's fine. I've got this. 1) True enough. I don't think strangers need me sobbing on their shoulders. Also I've been attacked when I do show emotions or told to stop that, so yeah, why would I? 2) Not really true. I can survive alone with no contact for longer than a lot of types. But I'm actually pretty social for an introvert. And INTJs, even those who are less social, will suck it up in favor of their plans. I'd think other types such as INTP, who doesn't like to do anything with their knowledge, would be far more reclusive.
Okay but there's this thing where I will make backup plans for projects and then forget to make lunch and don't have time so I have to make up something quick and GUESS WHO DIDN'T PLAN FOR THAT.
When i was studying for my exams, i completely forgot to talk to my mom.. for about 2 weeks.. i talked to her today.. and apologized for not calling her for a very long time. She replied with 'Nah you better do the dishes for the next two weeks' and laughed it off PS my mom is an estp Not talking to other people for even an year is pretty normal for me, but its different when it comes to my mom
It’s why people don’t like playing certain games with me, because I think so many steps ahead of what they will do and of how to stop them. I also don’t like competitive games because I’m the bad guy if I win but if someone else wins they like to lord it over me because it is rare, like a “gotcha” moment. I don’t do that to them when I win.
"I would actually be a great supervillain if it weren't for the fact that I have zero desire to completely dominate a world inhabited by abject morons..." -- INTJ
1 and 2 are normal for me too, as INFJ. Number 3 is acceptably relatable...it feels kind as the Milkmaid tale for me. "When I sell my milk and buy a hen and hatch the eggs and sell the chicks and buy a house..." Then comes some Se dom and tells you broke your milk pot...So, be careful Ni doms!
i said that if i cant be a designer, ill be a tailor, if not that then i will wprk as accountant, if not that, then maybe as nurse hopefully in somehwere where nurses a paid more like in America
Wow, yes I actually do have backup plans for my back up plans. I also tend to see the very far reaching consequences of actions. If i am not doing something or delaying something its usually because I see a strategic advantage in it.
For the last one, I like to give myself a challenge so that the backup plan for my backup plan is something I come up with on the spot should the situation arise. It's a great mental exercise where you mentally place everything on the table, review and decide the next course of action.
When we do think about details but not as the same way ISTJs would. Instead of thinking of physical practical ways to solve it, when it happens atm. We just make a contingency plan to evade that physical situation which falls into the 3rd explanation of what INTJs think of what we think other people think is common but isnt. We try to solve it before it happens or keep it from happening. (Nervous laughing)
When im doing something i always doubt it so i make a back up plan then if that fails ihave another one i always want to make sure i wont do a mistake so i need a backup
I make a backup plan because I can see the fundamental and complex problems in my plans and systems effortlessly, So I'll make a backup plan for that plan, and then find of a way to kind of mush it in. The result? It'll seem like I had this huge masterplan when in reality it's just a lot of imperfect plans stacked together.
As INTJ’s, we sailed through Covid lock downs because we enjoy staying to ourselves. The only thing I yearned for during lockdowns was to travel, we INTJ’s enjoy.
I'm an INTJ and this is so accurate. Yes I'm a forward thinker and always have a backup plan, backup to the backup, and a back up to the backup backup plan. I can see things happening long before others do. I tell friends and family my superpower is finding patterns in everything. Not exaggerating on that either.
I am an INTJ and I know that those things are not too normal but also nothing that is too weird either as I experienced with others. But what I feel is normal what others do see as rather weird is being honest and direct, that my work will put pressure on me until I do it even when I need a break and me acting completely icy when something bad happens to me because I can manage to overload myself with thoughts and work and have that breakdown once I'm alone at home and not have anyone around me
Week or two? Shit I didn't talk to my dad for like 3 years, my cousin who was my best friend I haven't talked to or hung out with in almost two months.
Why does this community call me out so much😂😭 my plan A I’m sure of, plan B 90-95% confidence, plans C-E range from 50-80% confidence and fluctuate in position. This way you make sure you’re never stuck doing nothing productive if something blows up in your face.
Just finding Im out a intj, I thought it was normal to have plans and back up plans to have for any possibilities. Guess a lot of people don’t prefer to be strategic.
As an ESTJ event planner I prefer to get things done in advance and know what's going on and plan physical details ahead of time. However since I don't have much introverted Intuition or Ni like you do, I'm not good at imagining what I would do in a bunch of theoretical scenarios. I would like to be more strategic but I can't, except when it's something I'm familiar with, like an event that I've worked at before.
@@sarahberkner for me i practice meditation or breathing exercises to help with thinking things through in scenarios. Also can play things like chess to increase your strategy.
I hate surprises because i tend to plan everything. But that doesnt mean i dont have another plan because i expect surprises may come. Backup plan to back up plan
my parents are extroverted people and I am open with them. they don't understand that i don't desire personal communication with others.small talk is fine but deep level conversations are a no for me.
I'm an ENFP and like to have backup plans for my backup plans, at least for starting my business. It's an existing type of school that has an 80% college graduation rate that doesn't stress students out and treats them with the respect they deserve as people. Here's the description I wrote just for INTJ's: Its Christian and K-12. A "Sudbury" school. Sudbury schools have an 80% COLLEGE GRADUATION RATE. Public schools in the USA are lucky to have 60%. In my region it's 20%. 80% is amazing! This is based on data from over 1,800 students and over 50 years of experience. In addition, 100% graduate proficient in reading, whereas in my school district, which has one of the highest high school graduation rates in the nation (97.6%), reading proficiency is only at 58-70% (depending on the source). Which also means STUDENTS CAN GRADUATE FROM PUBLIC SCHOOL WITHOUT KNOWING HOW TO READ. At a public school, students sit at desks. A teacher instructs them on a small chunk of a single subject. For example, perabolas in math. The students then practice it with a worksheet, try to memorize how to do it, and then take a test to prove they've learned what the teacher taught. But child development says we shouldn't be sitting in desks most of the time, and should get time outside, not only for Vitamin D but even for preventing near-sightedness in adulthood, depression, and anxiety. It also says that kids should be playing most of the time. Play truly is a rigorus form of learning, even if we can't see what tiny chunk of a single subject they are learning. When they are preschoolers, they play house, build with legos, and chase each other. As older kids, they play board games, devise creative outdoor games, build forts out of what they find outside, play instruments, and cook. As teens they write novels, make videos, cook better, get GOOD at music, and make petitions. When they are coming up near graduation, they think about what they want to do after graduation, and prepare for that. All of these things require and rigorously develop their skills in all things Life, including the notoriously difficult subjects of reading and math. And play does WELL. No wonder God/ evolution made us love to play! And psychology, child development, and educational research combined say we work and learn best when we are intrinsically motivated, applying what we are learning, and using mixed practice. The only way to have all of these is for the student to choose an activity they are intrinsically motivated to do, that uses multiple competencies from multiple fields, and then do the activity, all because THEY want to, not because somebody else wants them to. At Sudbury schools, this is what happens. The crazy thing is that it is counter intuitive. The school has no classrooms, no teachers, no tests, and no grades. That's right! No more punishing kids for making mistakes (via grades), leading them to avoid challenging and worthwhile things for fear of messing up. No more, "Sorry, we already covered that. We can't go back to it or the rest of the class will fall behind." No more prison-like "education" where you really learn to just conform, follow tedious directions, and memorize useless stuff so you can jump through hoops and forget it forever after the test. At Sudbury k-12, students learn naturally by doing all the things kids and teens do for fun. They play in all the ways described above, and learn all the things they need to learn. And no one tells them to do it. If that doesn't scream "this works even though it seems counter intuitive," I don't know what does! Contrary to popular belief, kids and teens are not monsters. When they are treated respectfully, they appreciate order and fairness, and when they are given responsibility for upholding fairness, they defend it fiercely. At Sudbury schools, students and staff (not teachers, but staff) make rules by majority vote or consensus. And I have a copy of the rules currently used at the first Sudbury school. They are actually stricter than I prefer! And this was all done by students! For example, they have agreed to make it against the rules to sword fight each other with sticks. A fair rule to keep safety, in hindsight. They also use a lot of legalese. The rules read like a government document. They certainly don't dumb it down! Students also enforce the rules. If a rule is broken, a student may file a complaint, and the Judicial Committee (made up of students) investigates the incident, determines if a rule was broken, and decides the consequence. Because everyone has a part in making the rules and enforcing them, they actually are willing to follow them and want to see them enforced. They want harmony. They are actually able to cultivate a strong culture of trust. In addition, students manage the money of the school (the first Sudbury school has been running since 1968 and is still thriving!) and manage everything else, including doing the cleaning. Of course, every mistake imaginable has been made, but the process worked at solving it and making rules to prevent it from happening again, and they are still around today because of it, and are doing amazing! This results in an environment of responsibility, accountability, respect, trust, agency, and maturity. Not just in theory, but in practice. Again, this is based on over 50 years of experience with over 1,800 students at Sudbury Valley School, the model for all other Sudbury schools. The 80% college graduation rate is just the cherry on top. If you want to read more, go here: sudburyvalley.org/blog If you want to help me make one in my area, comment below and I'll check my email every week for the next 2 months for responses. (I set an alarm on my phone to remind me.)
Another thing would be just not wanting to do things, which is what confuses me about INTJs, who doesn't like doing activities or going out to get some sunshine?
Nothing here that I don't agree with, as an INTP. Though my observation is that INTPs and INTJs get to their backup plans differently. Intjs seem to have specific plans for specific risks they perceive in a course of action. Intps tend to have a vast list of things that may go wrong, and try to remain ready for pretty much anything.
I relate, as well (but not as much as you guys, I'm sure). I know if my backup plan ends up not working, i could also quickly think of another (conceptual) thing that could work. Most times my last minute thought is my BEST thought (lack of time forcibly narrowing down my Ne). Which I guess is the same thing as the latter part lol.
💯 I could make a plan and a back up plan for that plan but that's too narrow-minded or specifically thinking that one future will happen and avoiding the other possibilities or outcomes ...
I don’t have a back up plan, what usually happens if something fails immediately I know what to do next with a new backup plan for the backup plan. 🤷🏻♀️. I know how to deal with devastation, negativity, etc.. common sense
Actually, it's the ENP types that are going to have half a dozen different plans as backups. As an INTJ, I make *one* plan that is complex enough to cover as many eventualities as possible. What you think are backup plans is actually just part of one big Xanatos Gambit. The difference really shows when something completely unexpected happens that throws us off guard completely. I've seen ENTPs easily shift to a different track in that kind of situation, but I tend to freeze up completely or go into purely reactive extraverted sensing survival mode, because my brain needs time to process the unforeseen situation into a completely new outlook and plan.
As an INTJ, honestly I thought that being alone most of the time and not sharing emotions was pretty normal.
Surprisingly not, as a high schooler that is a shock to me hearing how open people are about stuff like that. As an INTP I related to all but the plan and goal stuff, so yup being alone all day in my room is the ideal
I thought it was rather beneficial than negative.
Isfp have a. Lot of alone time too
Same
Not an INTJ however I do the same things and family often tell me they think something is off about me which always confuses me.
I thought everyone plans a backup plan to a backup plan to a backup plan to a plan 😂 isn't that normal tho?
Nope!!😅😅
Why would you think its normal to all?
-intj
Yup!
Thinking everyone thinks like you is a sign of a lack of sympathy and understanding to how other people work.
Also, as an ISTJ, I also make backup plans to backup plans... its just that I often dont have the time because Im so busy being productive.
@@NevertahnProduction Good for you. 🙄
Yep! I am the unusual INTJ female and not showing emotions really catches people off guard. Ive had to learn how to make myself express emotions... even if it makes me really uncomfortable.. because other people need it. They deserve to know I love them even if I suck at expressing it.
Please keep expressing yourself! It's SAFE from ENFP
I can totally relate to this. I have a hard time expressing my emotions in a way that people can understand. And it's also hard for me to show that I care about people's feelings. Usually I'm just like "ok I see you're upset. I'm here if you need me but idk what to say to you."
Yeah, I do it but I don't like it. It feels weird, vulnerable and embarrassing.
Sees someone crying...
Me INTJ-A female : "did somebody died!??
Some1 : No.
Me : then stop crying 😂😂😂
I had to fake being emotionally expressive so that the narcissistic ex boss could figure out how to manipulate me
As an intj, those are true but, we also make a back up plan for that back up plan.
😂 Every time
Never fails lol my everyday life I have like 16 plans for my own true plan. Already on the go. Heck as of today I had to use three of those back up plans 😂
Yeah not just plan b but the whole alphabet 😂😂😂😂... Damn.. other people lives are boring and empty 😂😂sad!
I thought it was normal to have at least 2 back up plans for the back up plan until my classmates back in high school saw my notes and were so shocked about how many plans I have(I have no idea about mbti's at this point). The leaders who got stuck with me as a member also always asks my opinion how to delegate tasks to the members because I have mostly analyzed our group mate's personalities, strengths, weaknesses and techniques to make them cooperative.
It all makes sense now, as an INTJ I actually enjoyed the lockdown and WFH. Most of my colleagues returned to the office after the lockdown, I actually went 6 months WFH and honestly enjoyed the quiet and calm atmosphere
I am also an INTJ and i have to say i spend my whole week wating for the weekend,so i can spend a lot of time isolated with my own thoughts,i sometimes spend the nights thinking about what is going on with my life and what is going on around me
@@1gprix2 Same.
I enjoyed the lock down so freaking much.
I still tell people the lockdown time was one of my ultimate favorite time periods 😂 and they just don't understand it, 🤭 it was such a fun time for me, while people were panicking I was making pasties and enjoying my coffee time and learning new hobbies,.. I miss lockdown
...Oh yeah, I heard there was a lockdown a few years back. Didn't change much about my life, tbh.
INTP here. I think all INxx can relate to wanting to be alone a lot. Especially INTJ and INTP (we’re known as the most introverted types)
That’s true with the „IN…“ . I’m an INFJ and meet lots of people on my working day. So in my leisure time I enjoy it much to have time on my own and doing things on my own. I need it too to regenerate.
It's very INTP of you to perceive that
@l-ixir that’s right, especially INFJ- A Type
I concur
Intp
As an INTJ this are all true especially the pursuing our goals part
bitter and better truth
I've literally been thinking about an exam due tomorrow for a week now. I should probably study 😅
multiple back up plans definitely resonates. it comes naturally out of obsessively gaming out risks and trying to lower my stress levels by mitigating those risks
I'm used to a hundred things going wrong all at once. So many plans fall apart after first contact. So I always try to look ahead and see what can go wrong with my initial plan, and I plan to mitigate that. It's like playing chess with yourself.
Murphy's law.
Living alone is the BEST decision that I've ever made 😂😂😂
I've only recently started sharing my(27) thoughts with my sister(32). It's nice to form a deeper bond with family. You don't have to keep all your thoughts to yourself, sometimes sharing them with someone close will give you better insights.
41m INTJ here.
Well said about other insights. I think for me when you do have a friend/loved one to talk too and you do decide to share your perspectives, that person or group could possibly see a variable or perspective we may have missed
Could help us see ways to move in life
I admire INTJs. I am an ENTJ and I always feel depressed when I am alone inside my room. I am crying so much 😭
its just right to have a backup plan for a backup plan.
As an INTJ, when I was a kid, I thought I am weird and not normal because I am different from the people around me. I tried so hard to be like the others. As I grow up, I embrace my personality and now proud of being an INTJ.
I don’t know if the last one is necessarily true. I don’t make backup plans or I get this huge overwhelming feeling that I rather not start. If it can’t be “perfect” then why start.
Those backup plans have come in clutch for me
Last bit is true, I have all my computer files backup on a hard drive and a backup of my backup plan, of course stored in two different locations and some files are even uploaded to. Miscellaneous cloud services. My wedding video is stored at three different locations.
INFP: i understand the isolation lol
As an istj, I think all of these are very normal
❤❤
I literally can spend years without talking to many people. but it's not like i can live without talking for atleast once for that long, we are human afterall. but yeah! it's true, there are most people on my messenger whom i talked for like years ago and never talked again. Just bcz i don't find talking to them necessary. It's kinda rude i know. But i guess all INTJs barely spend time on someone or something that they think are unnecessary for them.
As an INTJ that is completely normal for us because we need more alone times more than other types to recharge
Edit : omg this is the first ever time that
I've got so many likes on my comment
Be honest tho... Its not that yuu need more time alone, its that you do not NEED time with others. 😉
@@IkeOg yes , that's right
I hate that this modern society is built for extroverted. It is hell for introverted. I need a plan. A way out.
Probably because we're busy procrastinating too
I always called it decompressing.
When I was at school, people would ask me if I was angry, and would tell me to be less serious, whereas I was just mostly inside my head, thinking of abstract things and trying to figure out how some of them worked, and rarely talked to anyone. When I finally got some friends based on common interests and dark sense of humour, I still found it very weird that people hug each other as a way to greet/say goodbye. I got used to it, but still preferred to only do it with my 2 closest friends. What people think of hugs doesn't make sense to me, because it's a very deep, personal thing.
As a kid, I always found ways to entertain myself, i still am the same. But people try to convince me that I am not an introvert and that I have to find new friends because I need it (in their opinion). I tried to prove them otherwise, but since those attempts failed, I stopped since it practically didn't make any sense and was a waste of time to debate without finding a compromise. Everyone's different and everything's relative.
Emotions. I do experience deep emotions, but when it comes to sharing, I would only share with a specific group of people AND there would immediately be a block, which would result in filtering 90% of what I feel and maybe share the remaining 10%, because I don't want others to be overwhelmed. It's my problem, and the words of support only help a tiny bit, compared to analyzing the situation together and finding ways to resolve it.
If I were on the verge of crying, I would hold my regular facial expression up until the last moment where I would end up alone in some private room. If someone enters and catches me in my quiet tears, it'll only make me ashamed and my focus will shift towards thinking of how to escape the room without explaining what happened. I find it extremely difficult to explain the reason, there will might be lots of unnecessary judgement and emotions. So I mostly deal with stress by myself. Knowing this and knowing that I'm about to relieve stress by crying, I will first think of a place to do it safely, without anyone noticing.
Backup plans for backup plans for a couple of years in advance.... This thing along with the tests proved me that despite feeling sceptical whether I was an INTJ and being sort of resistant ("huh? they're emotionally blunt, I'm not"), I probably am one of them.
I am intj and it pains me how true it is! And it so funny how true this is.
I prefer modular plans. Then i can mix and match to fit the situation. Like, going to Wendy's I'll get a baconator or a jbc if they're out of meat somehow. But ill get a big mac at McDonald's, or nuggets if the store has a problem with IGNORING MY REQUEST FOR NO PICKLES.
The point is, modular plans allow me to adapt to the spontaneity of others.
Through first principles thinking you can remove many of the variables. Regarding food, I got a steam oven and reduced my diet to carnivore + fruit and now just eat perfectly sous-vide'd meat every day. If you save half an hour every day from cooking/buying food, that's a whole work month in a year.
Its not that we dont share emotions. We just share them with ourselfes and we feel satisfied enough from this
Exactly!
As intj I remeber when I was 18 I move to other country to study and I didn’t call any one of my friends for 6 month and I thought it was normal
I literally cannot go somewhere without having a backup plan for my backup plan for my main plan, especially when I’m on vacation.
Many people over the years have ridiculed me for having an overall life plan. I stopped sharing my plans. Now that I am older, these same people whine about how I have so much money (I don’t). I should have enough for a comfortable retirement, but not enough to go crazy. Question: Why don’t other people have a plan? Why would people laugh at me for having a plan? And who doesn’t have a backup plan?
point 2 I don't relate to as an INTJ but I am admittingly more extroverted than the average INTJ. I did performance arts and public speaking in school and am generally very social (utilizing either my entp shadow or esfp subconscious more often than my ego in social contexts). I crave partnerships and hanging out with others but that's also because I pretty much grew up living with my best friends since my homelife was not awesome so my best friends would have me every weekend and sometimes in weekdays, as well as all the holdays. I'm so grateful to my best friends who improved my life and saved me from depression.
They don't have a backup plan but can always come up with any number of back up plans as needed
Got multiple different SHIFT plans for just about every scenario. Didn’t realize others didn’t.
Had to learn to express emotions more to be a better older sibling and role model though.
As an INTJ, I have backup plans for backup plans to silly plans lol 😆 I just like to think all the possible outcomes and then manage to design a well prepared plan for it 😅
I was already living that way during COVID as an INTJ.
Not me traveling with 2 extra charger cords 3 power bricks, 5 hour energy shots , Dramamine , Pepto & aspirin.
I can do 8 hrs in public then need 16 hrs to recharge alone.
I 100% agree with these.
For me, the sharing of emotions can come from my Te Aux, telling my Fi Tert that you are going to waste someone elses time, if you express your emotions.
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All of these are on point.
Backup plan for a backup plan because life can lead us to the most unexpected situations but if I already made plans to get waffles for breakfast, I will get it
I can relate to the last one as an INFP. I like to have back-up plans. Though granted, I don't ALWAYS do this, but it is nonetheless, something I still do.
Oh and the isolation thing, yes, haha. But I don't get lonely sometimes. So even just to speak to someone via chat is enough, haha.
the expressed emotion: "feels bad man"
Interesting. I see now. I also spend alot of time alone, dom Ni, only the difference is INTJs can go muuuch longer. Two weeks for them two days tops for me and not often...Like a shark vs a dolphine, I need to come up for air. I prefer to speak daily even for a short time. Keeps me sane. Ni does go nocturnal often in both i believe.
3) Yes, I have a back up plan for my plan. I have a back up plan for my back up plan. Actually, have about five or six back up plans for my plan, depending on how my initial moves shake out.
But I do realize that'd normal for me, and that everyone else starts having hysterics and flying off the handle in situations that are easily predictable and easily solved.
So I know it's not normal, and that one of the things I can do for the rest of the human race is to have back up plans to protect them from easily foreseeable issues.
It's fine. I've got this.
1) True enough. I don't think strangers need me sobbing on their shoulders. Also I've been attacked when I do show emotions or told to stop that, so yeah, why would I?
2) Not really true. I can survive alone with no contact for longer than a lot of types. But I'm actually pretty social for an introvert. And INTJs, even those who are less social, will suck it up in favor of their plans. I'd think other types such as INTP, who doesn't like to do anything with their knowledge, would be far more reclusive.
People : sharing feelings
INTJ : ALEEERT! ABOOORT!!!
Okay but there's this thing where I will make backup plans for projects and then forget to make lunch and don't have time so I have to make up something quick and GUESS WHO DIDN'T PLAN FOR THAT.
When i was studying for my exams, i completely forgot to talk to my mom.. for about 2 weeks.. i talked to her today.. and apologized for not calling her for a very long time.
She replied with 'Nah you better do the dishes for the next two weeks' and laughed it off
PS my mom is an estp
Not talking to other people for even an year is pretty normal for me, but its different when it comes to my mom
i remember playing a game with my friends and they told me why did you bother thinking this far and i just said well thats just how i do things.
It’s why people don’t like playing certain games with me, because I think so many steps ahead of what they will do and of how to stop them. I also don’t like competitive games because I’m the bad guy if I win but if someone else wins they like to lord it over me because it is rare, like a “gotcha” moment. I don’t do that to them when I win.
"I would actually be a great supervillain if it weren't for the fact that I have zero desire to completely dominate a world inhabited by abject morons..." -- INTJ
1 and 2 are normal for me too, as INFJ. Number 3 is acceptably relatable...it feels kind as the Milkmaid tale for me. "When I sell my milk and buy a hen and hatch the eggs and sell the chicks and buy a house..."
Then comes some Se dom and tells you broke your milk pot...So, be careful Ni doms!
Nice!! I like this
i said that if i cant be a designer, ill be a tailor, if not that then i will wprk as accountant, if not that, then maybe as nurse hopefully in somehwere where nurses a paid more like in America
Wow, yes I actually do have backup plans for my back up plans. I also tend to see the very far reaching consequences of actions. If i am not doing something or delaying something its usually because I see a strategic advantage in it.
I actually have a tab on my computer labeled “plan B careers”. Friend saw it on my laptop and found it odd. 😂
For the last one, I like to give myself a challenge so that the backup plan for my backup plan is something I come up with on the spot should the situation arise. It's a great mental exercise where you mentally place everything on the table, review and decide the next course of action.
When we do think about details but not as the same way ISTJs would. Instead of thinking of physical practical ways to solve it, when it happens atm. We just make a contingency plan to evade that physical situation which falls into the 3rd explanation of what INTJs think of what we think other people think is common but isnt. We try to solve it before it happens or keep it from happening. (Nervous laughing)
When im doing something i always doubt it so i make a back up plan then if that fails ihave another one i always want to make sure i wont do a mistake so i need a backup
I always make sure to make only one plan, but it might make an impact to another sector of my analysis scope
ISTJ here.
We get it (the first 2 at least).
Plans are just a good idea and never survive implemention
When we are alone, we are interacting with our inner secret selves, which is a person better than most people in society.
I make a backup plan because I can see the fundamental and complex problems in my plans and systems effortlessly, So I'll make a backup plan for that plan, and then find of a way to kind of mush it in. The result? It'll seem like I had this huge masterplan when in reality it's just a lot of imperfect plans stacked together.
Thank you for this insight. I can INTJ now.
- ENFP
I’m INTP that so so much similarities to INTJ … I even believe that I’m INTJ but unfortunately I’m the lazy and procrastinating one
The info on my USB is also downloaded on my laptop, and also printed out. A backup plan for my back up plan backed up by a back up plan. Simple 😊
That man is on the money it’s definitely normal to us😂
I don’t have friends. I have colleagues, clients, and contacts.
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The back up has a back up!! We all have at LEAST one plan C every 10 seconds of driving
A backup plan for a backup plan is so wild 😂
As INTJ’s, we sailed through Covid lock downs because we enjoy staying to ourselves. The only thing I yearned for during lockdowns was to travel, we INTJ’s enjoy.
I'm an INTJ and this is so accurate. Yes I'm a forward thinker and always have a backup plan, backup to the backup, and a back up to the backup backup plan. I can see things happening long before others do. I tell friends and family my superpower is finding patterns in everything. Not exaggerating on that either.
First two apply to all IxTxs and the third one is more of a Si-Ne thing. INTJs get more attached to singular idea of how the things will turn out.
I had to learn how to express my thoughts and emotions to other people. It's still very exhausting.
I usually talk to my family only when eating food and when they want me to do something for them and then i just nod or "yea" or "ok"
INTJ: Plans like BATMAN
im fine understanding others emotions and trying to dissect and understand them and like reason with them but will never open up.
I am an INTJ and I know that those things are not too normal but also nothing that is too weird either as I experienced with others. But what I feel is normal what others do see as rather weird is being honest and direct, that my work will put pressure on me until I do it even when I need a break and me acting completely icy when something bad happens to me because I can manage to overload myself with thoughts and work and have that breakdown once I'm alone at home and not have anyone around me
Totally agree 👍🏻 I'm INTJ, too.
Being a mom as an INTJ is so exhausting, I get jealous of other moms who don't get exhausted by their kids
Week or two? Shit I didn't talk to my dad for like 3 years, my cousin who was my best friend I haven't talked to or hung out with in almost two months.
Why does this community call me out so much😂😭 my plan A I’m sure of, plan B 90-95% confidence, plans C-E range from 50-80% confidence and fluctuate in position. This way you make sure you’re never stuck doing nothing productive if something blows up in your face.
Just finding Im out a intj, I thought it was normal to have plans and back up plans to have for any possibilities. Guess a lot of people don’t prefer to be strategic.
As an ESTJ event planner I prefer to get things done in advance and know what's going on and plan physical details ahead of time. However since I don't have much introverted Intuition or Ni like you do, I'm not good at imagining what I would do in a bunch of theoretical scenarios. I would like to be more strategic but I can't, except when it's something I'm familiar with, like an event that I've worked at before.
@@sarahberkner for me i practice meditation or breathing exercises to help with thinking things through in scenarios. Also can play things like chess to increase your strategy.
So fascinating!
As a istp I understand this so much and I agree with the first two but I don’t make much plans as much as them.
I’m shocked by how much time is allotted to social living with others. I often think I’m the one being cavalier with “free” time 😮
Yep yep yep. mabye like 5d-2w before I'd notice or care I haven't spoken to anyone yet mentally and I do have backups for backups.
Thanks for sharing
The thing is we don’t have to do the I have no emotions thing because I not the best coping mechanism!
As an INTJ, how does anyone survive without at least 10 backup plans?
I hate surprises because i tend to plan everything. But that doesnt mean i dont have another plan because i expect surprises may come. Backup plan to back up plan
my parents are extroverted people and I am open with them. they don't understand that i don't desire personal communication with others.small talk is fine but deep level conversations are a no for me.
I'm an ENFP and like to have backup plans for my backup plans, at least for starting my business.
It's an existing type of school that has an 80% college graduation rate that doesn't stress students out and treats them with the respect they deserve as people. Here's the description I wrote just for INTJ's:
Its Christian and K-12. A "Sudbury" school.
Sudbury schools have an 80% COLLEGE GRADUATION RATE. Public schools in the USA are lucky to have 60%. In my region it's 20%. 80% is amazing! This is based on data from over 1,800 students and over 50 years of experience.
In addition, 100% graduate proficient in reading, whereas in my school district, which has one of the highest high school graduation rates in the nation (97.6%), reading proficiency is only at 58-70% (depending on the source). Which also means STUDENTS CAN GRADUATE FROM PUBLIC SCHOOL WITHOUT KNOWING HOW TO READ.
At a public school, students sit at desks. A teacher instructs them on a small chunk of a single subject. For example, perabolas in math. The students then practice it with a worksheet, try to memorize how to do it, and then take a test to prove they've learned what the teacher taught.
But child development says we shouldn't be sitting in desks most of the time, and should get time outside, not only for Vitamin D but even for preventing near-sightedness in adulthood, depression, and anxiety.
It also says that kids should be playing most of the time. Play truly is a rigorus form of learning, even if we can't see what tiny chunk of a single subject they are learning. When they are preschoolers, they play house, build with legos, and chase each other. As older kids, they play board games, devise creative outdoor games, build forts out of what they find outside, play instruments, and cook. As teens they write novels, make videos, cook better, get GOOD at music, and make petitions. When they are coming up near graduation, they think about what they want to do after graduation, and prepare for that. All of these things require and rigorously develop their skills in all things Life, including the notoriously difficult subjects of reading and math. And play does WELL. No wonder God/ evolution made us love to play!
And psychology, child development, and educational research combined say we work and learn best when we are intrinsically motivated, applying what we are learning, and using mixed practice. The only way to have all of these is for the student to choose an activity they are intrinsically motivated to do, that uses multiple competencies from multiple fields, and then do the activity, all because THEY want to, not because somebody else wants them to.
At Sudbury schools, this is what happens.
The crazy thing is that it is counter intuitive. The school has no classrooms, no teachers, no tests, and no grades. That's right! No more punishing kids for making mistakes (via grades), leading them to avoid challenging and worthwhile things for fear of messing up. No more, "Sorry, we already covered that. We can't go back to it or the rest of the class will fall behind." No more prison-like "education" where you really learn to just conform, follow tedious directions, and memorize useless stuff so you can jump through hoops and forget it forever after the test.
At Sudbury k-12, students learn naturally by doing all the things kids and teens do for fun. They play in all the ways described above, and learn all the things they need to learn. And no one tells them to do it.
If that doesn't scream "this works even though it seems counter intuitive," I don't know what does!
Contrary to popular belief, kids and teens are not monsters. When they are treated respectfully, they appreciate order and fairness, and when they are given responsibility for upholding fairness, they defend it fiercely.
At Sudbury schools, students and staff (not teachers, but staff) make rules by majority vote or consensus. And I have a copy of the rules currently used at the first Sudbury school. They are actually stricter than I prefer! And this was all done by students! For example, they have agreed to make it against the rules to sword fight each other with sticks. A fair rule to keep safety, in hindsight. They also use a lot of legalese. The rules read like a government document. They certainly don't dumb it down!
Students also enforce the rules. If a rule is broken, a student may file a complaint, and the Judicial Committee (made up of students) investigates the incident, determines if a rule was broken, and decides the consequence. Because everyone has a part in making the rules and enforcing them, they actually are willing to follow them and want to see them enforced. They want harmony. They are actually able to cultivate a strong culture of trust.
In addition, students manage the money of the school (the first Sudbury school has been running since 1968 and is still thriving!) and manage everything else, including doing the cleaning. Of course, every mistake imaginable has been made, but the process worked at solving it and making rules to prevent it from happening again, and they are still around today because of it, and are doing amazing!
This results in an environment of responsibility, accountability, respect, trust, agency, and maturity. Not just in theory, but in practice. Again, this is based on over 50 years of experience with over 1,800 students at Sudbury Valley School, the model for all other Sudbury schools.
The 80% college graduation rate is just the cherry on top.
If you want to read more, go here: sudburyvalley.org/blog
If you want to help me make one in my area, comment below and I'll check my email every week for the next 2 months for responses. (I set an alarm on my phone to remind me.)
Month one, and I've successfully been checking!
Two months is over.
Im currently looking for property in the middle of the woods to move to permanently. If that ain't INFJ af idk what is lol
Sounds normal to me. However I am one.
Another thing would be just not wanting to do things, which is what confuses me about INTJs, who doesn't like doing activities or going out to get some sunshine?
Everything my man just described is normal.
Everyone else is abnormal
Nothing here that I don't agree with, as an INTP. Though my observation is that INTPs and INTJs get to their backup plans differently.
Intjs seem to have specific plans for specific risks they perceive in a course of action. Intps tend to have a vast list of things that may go wrong, and try to remain ready for pretty much anything.
I relate, as well (but not as much as you guys, I'm sure).
I know if my backup plan ends up not working, i could also quickly think of another (conceptual) thing that could work.
Most times my last minute thought is my BEST thought (lack of time forcibly narrowing down my Ne). Which I guess is the same thing as the latter part lol.
💯 I could make a plan and a back up plan for that plan but that's too narrow-minded or specifically thinking that one future will happen and avoiding the other possibilities or outcomes ...
I think all but the last are common with INTPs, ISTPs and ISTJs too. And even IFs can be pretty selective about sharing emotions.
I don’t have a back up plan, what usually happens if something fails immediately I know what to do next with a new backup plan for the backup plan. 🤷🏻♀️. I know how to deal with devastation, negativity, etc.. common sense
Thank you for sharing
I thought it was normal. I love being alone.
I plan everything and I love it
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I have to force myself to smile around people, just so I don't look depressed.
Hmmm, idk still why I act like more than one of these types.. can someone explain why I’m having trouble finding my personality type??
Actually, it's the ENP types that are going to have half a dozen different plans as backups. As an INTJ, I make *one* plan that is complex enough to cover as many eventualities as possible. What you think are backup plans is actually just part of one big Xanatos Gambit. The difference really shows when something completely unexpected happens that throws us off guard completely. I've seen ENTPs easily shift to a different track in that kind of situation, but I tend to freeze up completely or go into purely reactive extraverted sensing survival mode, because my brain needs time to process the unforeseen situation into a completely new outlook and plan.