Why old men like young women | Understanding Men University | Tony Gaskins

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  • Опубликовано: 1 ноя 2024

Комментарии • 1,7 тыс.

  • @Dr.Elaine1
    @Dr.Elaine1 3 года назад +1355

    “If you are looking for an older man, I am here to tell you, he is looking for you, but he is looking for you for the wrong reasons.” TG

  • @mitz1919
    @mitz1919 3 года назад +1016

    He said if you want emotional security “Go to Jesus”... you want financial security “Get on ya grind” 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽

    • @MzSoulll
      @MzSoulll 3 года назад +15

      that's a word!!!!

    • @audreyd1787
      @audreyd1787 3 года назад +15

      If you want emotional security you need to figure out why you do the things you do & to face your past trauma.

    • @caroline.eeveeb
      @caroline.eeveeb 3 года назад +5

      Audrey D but I think we all want emotional security in a relationship. that’s the entire point of a relationship.

    • @helena3631
      @helena3631 3 года назад +7

      Right that’s why Iam working on my finances at 30.. these men 10-15 yrs older doing worst than me at times… I will secure my own bag 💰💰💰

    • @xoxo.cherribomb
      @xoxo.cherribomb 3 года назад

      I agree

  • @jenellej2885
    @jenellej2885 3 года назад +779

    I was talking to a man 15 years older than me, and he was the worst. He was very mean, controlling, and manipulative. 🤦🏾‍♀️

    • @concernedcitizen8448
      @concernedcitizen8448 3 года назад +48

      Ex-husband was only 6.5 yrs older...same track different cho-choo!

    • @alethiamillner5603
      @alethiamillner5603 3 года назад +8

      @@concernedcitizen8448 good one

    • @Raybeari
      @Raybeari 3 года назад +6

      I want marry a older guy like 30 year's old and only 23 year's old

    • @mmxw2294
      @mmxw2294 3 года назад +15

      I’m a bit older and I thought I could date older men because I’m older too well the same thing happened down right abusive 56 I was so disappointed I stop dating over a year working on myself

    • @SoulJourner_Maat
      @SoulJourner_Maat 3 года назад +22

      Sis>>I feel your pain! I'm STILL Healing & Undoing the Programming/Conditioning from the Trauma of being with a "grown-boy" who was 14 years older than Me...LESSON LEARNED

  • @victoriousqueen8503
    @victoriousqueen8503 3 года назад +541

    Most older men trying to live through these youngster women. They've lived there lives already. If u asked me, most of them going through midlife crisis and don't want to accept that they getting older.

    • @annamayyy9771
      @annamayyy9771 3 года назад +51

      That's true. I've met older men with children trying to date me and IL be thinking like you want me to be a stepmom. They think it's normal. They had their time and need to look for someone in a similar situation

    • @realtruth3762
      @realtruth3762 3 года назад +11

      C S don't you feel disgusted by him? Honest question no offense

    • @misst72
      @misst72 3 года назад +27

      You are correct. The old man I married did this to me. That was a horrifying experience. I'd not EVER encourage a young woman under 30 to marry an old man. The imbalances between them are just too great.
      I was 23 when I married that guy, and we had a child. My pregnancy was high risk, so age makes no difference in that aspect either.

    • @BitterPeachh
      @BitterPeachh 3 года назад +1

      @@CS-pl1re lol sugardaddy

    • @Alexis_005
      @Alexis_005 3 года назад +9

      The same men saying to women “clock is ticking”

  • @staceythorpe7938
    @staceythorpe7938 3 года назад +603

    Getting old is inevitable; Maturation is a choice. Apostle Paul said when I was a child I thought as a child, spoke as a child, understood as a child but when I became a man I put away childish things.

    • @PeaceBeStill-
      @PeaceBeStill- 3 года назад +10

      Amen!

    • @mmommo-hx4dx
      @mmommo-hx4dx 3 года назад +3

      yay stacie love it

    • @thediabolicalempath7246
      @thediabolicalempath7246 3 года назад +18

      That is so true but some men remain as children because of their upbringing. There’s a man who is in his sixties but has the mentality of a twelve year old boy.

    • @Rita-cy3qw
      @Rita-cy3qw 3 года назад +3

      Amen Sister 💐

    • @sandrasalinas9787
      @sandrasalinas9787 3 года назад

      Good example

  • @kilimanjaro5537
    @kilimanjaro5537 3 года назад +253

    “Somebody who is operating purely is not looking for somebody from a whole another generation.” 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾. Yes, indeed, Tony.

  • @fabiennepdt4898
    @fabiennepdt4898 3 года назад +388

    AGE doesn't equate to WISDOM. Only true character matters within a reasonable age range, when choosing a man.

    • @yaazzyy8410
      @yaazzyy8410 3 года назад +2

      🤙🏽🤙🏽

    • @newme572
      @newme572 3 года назад +4

      Say that shit again for the people in the back !!!!

    • @rakimuh3187
      @rakimuh3187 3 года назад +2

      I always prayed for this .

    • @QueenConsious
      @QueenConsious Год назад +2

      Amen I say this exact thing to everybody that thinks age determines maturity and wisdom

    • @Devonna
      @Devonna Год назад +1

      True WISDOM come from GOD.

  • @jewelsafire6844
    @jewelsafire6844 3 года назад +589

    They prefer very young & naive for their own exploits. So, be careful out here.

    • @riorio-rt1oq
      @riorio-rt1oq 3 года назад +46

      They think we hating when we tell them

    • @jewelsafire6844
      @jewelsafire6844 3 года назад +15

      @@riorio-rt1oq Sadly, yes.

    • @linahernandez6913
      @linahernandez6913 3 года назад +61

      Yup to train them how they want and they don’t want the woman to have their own minds easier to manipulate them!!!

    • @joharilarosa6230
      @joharilarosa6230 3 года назад +3

      So true

    • @Mcraz05
      @Mcraz05 3 года назад +5

      @@riorio-rt1oq that's part of the reason. But the truth is men are not as mature as women so when we get with a chick our age or older, we try our best to keep them and spend our time tryna fulfill the expectations and have to protect you and pay for everything while if I'm with a younger chick, she is emotionally gonna chase me because I'm more mature than men her age. So I can spend my time on my goals n other shit without worrying what I should do 24/7 to please her so she wont leave me for a better man.

  • @ninapeterson275
    @ninapeterson275 3 года назад +543

    As a woman in her 20’s. Ive realised that they tend to gravitate towards us only sexually. Otherwise every woman will be snapped up by 25 but it’s rarely the case. I’ve dated older men and I realise that their ex wives are much older and the ones who recently married. Married women 28+. So I’m not sure. 🤷🏽‍♀️ I’m starting to think this is a myth. I looked at studies and women in the west aren’t married until 28-35+ on average. So when we say prefer young, in what way? Because it is very important to know. Being viewed as desirable for only sexual activities isn’t a compliment to me.

    • @amarjotsingh8455
      @amarjotsingh8455 3 года назад +175

      They are predators. Older men like that purposely go for someone younger bc they can control them financially and emotionally. Women their own age can see through the bs and don’t want to be with a manchild

    • @ninapeterson275
      @ninapeterson275 3 года назад +61

      @@amarjotsingh8455 The gag is, those types of men do not tend to have a lot of money? I guess it’s about who the little money that they have can spread the furthest with?

    • @amarjotsingh8455
      @amarjotsingh8455 3 года назад +62

      @@ninapeterson275 Yea But still the average 35 year old man is still more established than a 22 year old women who just got out of college and is figuring out her life. The older man in the situation (on average) still has some sort of house, cars, savings etc and a lot of times older men sabotage younger women careers bc they are jealous of a woman bettering herself to where eventually she can make more etc. overall they are predators

    • @Yna-u3g
      @Yna-u3g 3 года назад +106

      It's not a compliment...It's disgusting...I have nieces your age and I would be horrified if they showed up with a man my age...Men use younger women as symbols of their dying youth...I avoided older men in my twenties because they behaved all creepy and predatory...Gross...

    • @tateetaylorifics53
      @tateetaylorifics53 3 года назад +16

      I was 19 my son sperm donor was 44 in 2010 when i met him. That’s a 24 year difference.

  • @bpassion4fashion581
    @bpassion4fashion581 Год назад +68

    “He is a pervert” 😂😂😂the way you delivered that . HILLARIOUS!
    And yes! …You hit on the the nail. We think that older men are wise, secure , powerful and that they will provide some sort of safety.
    The safety that most likely we didn’t received from a fatherless childhood . A bit late but i learnt my lesson. Now I want to work on myself and hopefully God will place the right man in my life when and if the time is right !

  • @CaramelCuban
    @CaramelCuban 3 года назад +314

    Tony, not lying I divorced my older husband almost a year ago he was running circles around me .. I was young & dumb &couldn’t see through muddy water!

    • @reneedouglas6699
      @reneedouglas6699 3 года назад +7

      Good for you!!👑

    • @ryanj357
      @ryanj357 3 года назад +6

      You do understand that the older a man gets the more developed his brain is right? Even if you dated a guy your age that doesn't mean when he's older he'll be the same as he was. Maybe women should stop choosing the wrong men instead of bringing an entire age group down.

    • @_zina9054
      @_zina9054 3 года назад +4

      Same met him at 21 he was 28 I'm 27 and just left just wasted my time but I learned to love myself

    • @onesolejeanius3498
      @onesolejeanius3498 2 года назад +1

      @@ryanj357 that's what I'm saying you can't let one man speak for his whole generation

    • @ryanj357
      @ryanj357 2 года назад +1

      @@onesolejeanius3498 It's ridiculous when these women give the "Young and dumb excuse" if he was such a bad guy then why did they choose to stay with him? And you're both adults. There's no excuses. Men are the natural leaders in a relationship. It's natural that a younger woman would want an older man. Can't believe she divorced him just because of his age.

  • @KayciazWorld
    @KayciazWorld 3 года назад +306

    Because often times when women are very young we're still finding ourselves in many ways. Which older men love to exploit...

    • @mmxw2294
      @mmxw2294 3 года назад +16

      I had a friend 46 telling me he can’t stand women his age because they’re angry unhappy etc married a women 27 and now his wife and him have these fights where he had the nerve to try to use me to cover something up and I didn’t allow it and lost a lot of respect for him

    • @zerotolerencetonarc1902
      @zerotolerencetonarc1902 3 года назад +6

      Your are right about that sis💜

    • @MrMannface
      @MrMannface 3 года назад +2

      Will keep your pants up that's probably the only thing he wants anyway as long as you keep your panties on when you can explore everything.

    • @audreyd1787
      @audreyd1787 3 года назад +5

      @@MrMannface then don’t complain when you can’t get laid.

    • @NikiBoBicki
      @NikiBoBicki 6 месяцев назад +1

      Bingo

  • @PV-ux3be
    @PV-ux3be 3 года назад +144

    I like older men but all that you are saying is true. But I have always stood on my own two feet and never back down from my beliefs. They always stop dealing with me bc I’m too independent and I talk back a lot 🤣

  • @XavianneNailz
    @XavianneNailz 3 года назад +428

    I was 18 dating a 36 year old man. I dated him for year and half and I remember having self doubt about everything I did. When I called it off he kept coming back. I didn’t know it was a soul tie until later on. When I turned 20 I started dating a 46 year old man. He approached me and convinced me he was different. Coming to find out he was married and was having sex with his wife, his baby mama as well as me. I learned my lesson with both men. Both men gaslight me, manipulated money from me, used me and hurt me emotionally and verbally.

    • @vh7637
      @vh7637 3 года назад +50

      I'm so sorry you went through this sis

    • @XavianneNailz
      @XavianneNailz 3 года назад +64

      @@vh7637 it’s ok, I’m in therapy now and I’ve made a vow to remain abstinence until marriage. ❤️

    • @Cynthia_X
      @Cynthia_X 3 года назад +8

      RUclips Sheraseven1...hope your okay

    • @happylindsay4475
      @happylindsay4475 3 года назад +9

      I feel you HARD on this Sis-keep healing and growing. Sending you love and support.

    • @XavianneNailz
      @XavianneNailz 3 года назад

      @@happylindsay4475 thank you 🙏🏽 ❤️

  • @joharilarosa6230
    @joharilarosa6230 3 года назад +165

    Young ladies you better leave those old men alone. They're old and sick looking for a Nurse. Don't get stuck having to take care of one.

    • @alwaysjolly1096
      @alwaysjolly1096 3 года назад +2

      Depends on the type of men...

    • @BitterPeachh
      @BitterPeachh 3 года назад +11

      Or being a widow before the age of 45.

    • @laughingoutofdepression8093
      @laughingoutofdepression8093 3 года назад +1

      Some of these older women are too bitter and have lost the capacity to love unconditionally and let go. I'm unhappy with that, that's why I have been dating a younger woman for the last two years. Marriage next on the agenda.. Personality and maturity says a lot....

    • @mrsdavies1984
      @mrsdavies1984 3 года назад

      If a young man has health issues that are hereditary or something from a freak accident, you’ll still be a caregiver😂

  • @gabrielagarza5811
    @gabrielagarza5811 3 года назад +124

    I was dating someone 17 years older than I was. Conclusion. I had daddy issues and I was inspired my his finances, after doing some growing and healing, I came to find out , that he was a lost soul and was broken from his divorce and couldn’t take the fact that he didn’t have his children 24/7 anymore. The best you could do for yourself is to keep working on you.

    • @nh003
      @nh003 2 года назад +4

      Same.. 18 yrs older & same shit:/

  • @larhondalivelife
    @larhondalivelife 3 года назад +191

    I tell men all the time. I don’t need a daddy. I have one.

  • @PeaceBeStill-
    @PeaceBeStill- 3 года назад +307

    Ladies, also keep in mind a lot of these older men have estranged wives that they forget to mention.

    • @wordym.3435
      @wordym.3435 3 года назад +9

      Facts

    • @14kurtismiller
      @14kurtismiller 3 года назад +11

      I think that in today's society two people should have to qualify before getting married. It is terrible how fast and easy so many get married. I come across married women often and I can tell good and well when they are hunting for someone on the side.

    • @thediabolicalempath7246
      @thediabolicalempath7246 3 года назад +30

      @@14kurtismiller Some married people are worse then single people because married people are the biggest flirts.

    • @womanofgod2948
      @womanofgod2948 3 года назад +2

      Preach it sister

    • @joharilarosa6230
      @joharilarosa6230 3 года назад +6

      Sure do cause who's going to take care of him when his old azz have a heart attack???

  • @s.r.125
    @s.r.125 3 года назад +87

    No lies been told!!! I knew a guy he was 56 y/o, he was into me and I am 28 y/o. He told me he only dates females between 23-27 y/o...😩😩😩 I call that a pervert 😒🤦🏽‍♀️.

  • @genj1184
    @genj1184 3 года назад +281

    - to easily manipulate them.
    - because they’re less likely to care if you have your shit together.

    • @amarjotsingh8455
      @amarjotsingh8455 3 года назад +67

      @@scaldon2 men risk it too. Older male sperm has been linked to Down syndrome. It’s not just the woman’s fault. It’s take two to tango

    • @ninapeterson275
      @ninapeterson275 3 года назад +32

      @@scaldon2 Then maybe start making women under 25 wives? It’s rarely happening enough according to studies. Then you blame women for it. Do you have a young wife or kids yourself?

    • @ninapeterson275
      @ninapeterson275 3 года назад +37

      @@amarjotsingh8455 Correct. In fact. Many sperm banks do not accept applications from men over 35.

    • @amarjotsingh8455
      @amarjotsingh8455 3 года назад +52

      @@scaldon2 your obsession with women’s bodies is gross and no woman wants a baby with a 60 year old man 🤢🤢

    • @ninapeterson275
      @ninapeterson275 3 года назад +27

      @@scaldon2 Lol it does not matter what men can have. It’s women who choose who procreates not men. And no one is choosing an old man unless he is super rich. Also, women push out the babies. Pregnancy is difficult. What 60 year old woman wants a baby at 60? Even if it could happen most wouldn’t want to 😂😂😂

  • @valenciasuggs8602
    @valenciasuggs8602 3 года назад +144

    This is true! My ex-husband was 11 years older than I. His first wife was only four years younger than him and he would comment that he had to teach her to do everything! I was naive but had spiritual grandparents. As I matured in the LORD I saw clearly how stagnant he remained. They are abusive, mean, condescending, controlling, and worse. It won’t last because if it is not Godly, it won’t grow!!! I could write a book and one of my goals (after 20 years, with only my children to show as blessings) is to warn women that you don’t want that energy!!! Don’t procrastinate and become spiritually famished!!! You can never get time back!!!

    • @nh003
      @nh003 2 года назад +3

      omg can u please explain more🥺

    • @ladybird491
      @ladybird491 Год назад +3

      @@nh003 I blew many years of my life on older men and they were all toxic and manipulative and narcissistic, never again.

  • @js8277
    @js8277 3 года назад +128

    You telling the truth Tony. Don't play yourself into believing that the older man has more to offer because you will be surprised down the road. In most cases they have motives which extend long-term like someone to care for them later in life while you're left feeling burdened and resentful because you are still able to "Dip It and Do It" When you are younger it seems cute. But wait until you get older but his older is way older than yours and things start getting outta balance. Also it is true, older men cheat on younger women too. So don't get it twisted. When he's strictly looking for much younger, it's not a compliment like you're winning. Remember, "Time Is Undefeated" 💯

    • @Bri3w
      @Bri3w 2 года назад +9

      From experience you’re 100% correct

    • @___.blessed.beauty.___b9446
      @___.blessed.beauty.___b9446 Год назад +2

      Wow I just said this!!! I met a guy recently he looked about 45… I figured so. But he told me he’s 39. He later revealed that he lied because he thought I wouldn’t talk to him. Lol my ex is 44… that didn’t go so well because he didn’t have it all together either. Older don’t mean wiser.

    • @ofurev754
      @ofurev754 5 месяцев назад

      Most of them are broke and broken. They made terrible financial choices in their lifetime. Then they would deceive you into thinking that the county’s financial situation is in decline and they are the only ones with financial security in town. They’d blame it on Trudeau and would coded-ly ask if you were sexually pure and would stare down at that cute young blonde I was staring at. He claimed to be 71 but he looked like a walking corpse. I’m only 18 by the way and that shit about women leaving their prime even at 22 😂 will only leave them in the hands of deranged men. But if I were honest, it’s not about age, some young men are just as bad and show the signs that when they get older, they’d be chasing younger women like our living forefathers are doing. Women should stay away from these type of men. We should go for men that like us for who we are not just our youth. I’m not promoting late marriage, but don’t let these immature 30 year olds or living corpses deceive you.

  • @beibei7176
    @beibei7176 3 года назад +109

    🙏 thank you, thank you, thank you for explaining this with such clarity. I am 12 years younger than my husband and as I matured during our 12 year relationship and broke from his control, he found a girl 22 years his junior to cheat with. I found her and we talked and we both realized she was just as naive as I was when he found me. We supported each other and let the world know who he truly was. Now I’m looking after me and I have a new friend too. Women, stop attacking other women, your man is the problem!

    • @Igboman87
      @Igboman87 2 года назад +4

      I agree with you to an extent, because every man has his own agenda when it comes to seeking women. What caught my attention in your post is the mentioning of the 12-year age difference between you and your ex. I recently turned 35 and a 23 year old woman is the youngest I'd go when it comes to dating. I'm also open to dating older women, but they can't be more than three years older than me at this point. Keep in mind I am not married and don't have kids.

    • @sarahalderman3126
      @sarahalderman3126 Год назад

      Yep a pedo will always be a pedo.

  • @AbianahTheGemini
    @AbianahTheGemini 3 года назад +339

    I’m 19 and I have had men in their 30’s-40’s every week contacting me trying to pay me for pictures. I go on their FB pages and they have wives and kids! I block them immediately, but it’s just sad that you would feel attracted to someone who is in the same grade as one of your children! Disgusting! Young women get a man who is close in age with you.
    You and your partner should grow together.

    • @misssterling3094
      @misssterling3094 3 года назад +26

      @@popa213 A 5 year or less age difference is decent, but larger than that is not good. Tony is telling the truth.

    • @realtruth3762
      @realtruth3762 3 года назад +6

      It really is disgusting

    • @alwaysjolly1096
      @alwaysjolly1096 3 года назад +5

      You still can grow despite the age

    • @ladystyles1174
      @ladystyles1174 3 года назад +1

      @@LA-wv7gf Same Way They Got My Ex-Fiance 😔 Good Bless You Mama My Ex Mother In Law.... Told Me She's A Woman Now & Can Have Sex With Whoever She Wants Now "Legally" Because We're 19 I'm So Hurt

    • @jane4726
      @jane4726 3 года назад +4

      Well said. My husband is sleeping with a young woman the same age as his daughters…he’s 34 years older than her. It’s sick and it’s destroyed everything they’ve ever known about their father.

  • @nwill08
    @nwill08 3 года назад +495

    My daughter is 22 years old and gets hit on/ogled all of the time by men in their 30s, 40s, etc. She thinks it’s gross. Good!

    • @d_roi8689
      @d_roi8689 3 года назад +42

      It's pedophilia. So glad she knows how to avoid perverts.

    • @Yahkeam
      @Yahkeam 3 года назад +39

      @@d_roi8689 don't be disingenuous. 22 is not a child.

    • @andreanavarro2341
      @andreanavarro2341 3 года назад +38

      It's not pedophilia. But she is young for those dudes. Although she is not a child but not a woman

    • @jenniferthompson5146
      @jenniferthompson5146 3 года назад +58

      It started for me when I was 17 or 18. One man looked like he was in his 80s. It's still happening and I am 29. I need to be more aggressive because it is downright disrespectful and predatory.

    • @d_roi8689
      @d_roi8689 3 года назад +94

      @@Yahkeam Compared to guys in their 30s and beyond, 22 is a child. There has to be something perverted about a man looking for intimacy with a woman young enough to be his daughter.

  • @sheygabit9641
    @sheygabit9641 2 года назад +17

    He's looking for you for the wrong reasons just as you're looking for him for the wrong reasons.That gave me meaning

  • @8lack8erry1
    @8lack8erry1 3 года назад +118

    Love how Tony feels no way to bring out the dictionary 😩😂love his no filtered, no shame attitude.

  • @mbalienhleearrings1289
    @mbalienhleearrings1289 3 года назад +156

    Honestly it's disgusting when I see an old man trying to make his move and in my mind I'm thinking, "Lord Jesus this person is older than my dad not to mention my grandfather," it's disgusting on so many levels and to think they don't see anything wrong with it is disturbing. Had this one grinning all the time on my way to work even offered to give me his numbers and would basically harass me for my numbers everyday then one day I snapped when I realised he thought I was playing when I refused to give out my numbers when I tell you he got in line chile - disgusting.

    • @Yna-u3g
      @Yna-u3g 3 года назад +24

      It really is disgusting...creepy as heck🤢...I don't have to worry about it now, though because I'm "too old" for older men...😅bvs... *shivering*...

    • @Yna-u3g
      @Yna-u3g 3 года назад +17

      @Wise4Sure 😅😅😅😅😅😅....Idk...Maybe I just don't pay attention to they creepy selves!😅😅😅...Even at at 40, I still would feel creeped out if a 60 year old tried to flirt!

    • @gdust6579
      @gdust6579 2 года назад

      an 80 yr old in my neighborhood creeped on me for 3 yrs since i moved here. nobody would believe how perverted and controlling he was to me. he made friends with everyone in the neighborhood while tormenting me. hed take me out to eat and convince me he was my only real friend and told me hed nibble my ear rub my feet and if he was 50yrs younger hed marry me. one time he made me get in his car when i was at the beach, go to a restaurant and told me he was falling in love with me. now i cant walk down the street cause i dont want to be harassed or obsessed over by him

  • @sheleathahopson
    @sheleathahopson 3 года назад +67

    You ain't lying. I learned the hard way

  • @Sugarpoo47
    @Sugarpoo47 3 года назад +45

    What A Word!!! Deliverance in 30 minutes!! That's all I dated were older men, because my Dad was much older than my Mom and he took care of his family. But as I look back, both parents went through heart ache and their marriage failed after 32 years of marriage. My relationships failed of dating older men. I did not need a Daddy, I had a good father. I needed a good man!!! Tony, keep being used of God!!

    • @gdust6579
      @gdust6579 2 года назад +2

      me too i think i try to get with older men who remind me of my dad but my dad was always there. but the older men ive been with always proved to be immature

  • @boobookitty3508
    @boobookitty3508 3 года назад +73

    They can’t impress or do enough for women their age so they seek younger women or he’s still in the party stage(even though he’s older) and he doesn’t take life or relationships seriously. He can be behind in life

    • @kevingarrett713
      @kevingarrett713 2 года назад +1

      Well said😁🥰

    • @BobJo-vp1qn
      @BobJo-vp1qn 4 месяца назад

      (SIGH) 🙄 So then according to YOU …older men actually PREFER old women …but since he can’t “impress” his “preference” he (SIGH) reluctantly just acquiesces and SETTLES for a younger; hotter; purer; more feminine; less run-through; less jaded; less experienced; more fertile YOUNGER woman? 🤔
      Oh those poor sad men ☹️ who have to SETTLE for young women after they get “rejected? …by the OLD post-wall women. Must SUCK! 😢

  • @lisel.133
    @lisel.133 3 года назад +44

    When my husband met me I was later 20's he was 36, I was far ahead with maturity , education and life goals . But this man was far ahead of me with Emotional and mental Manipulation till this day. I didnt see it coming each and every time he pulled his slick moves, then hide hands. Listen to Tony ladies...

  • @aliyahharmon9045
    @aliyahharmon9045 3 года назад +73

    Once I dated a man that was ten years older than me. He would speak down on me. Telling me I didn’t know any better, he’s been there done that, etc. Never again! I want to grow with someone not a surrogate father.

    • @marciachristina9513
      @marciachristina9513 3 года назад +1

      Been through this too

    • @onesolejeanius3498
      @onesolejeanius3498 2 года назад +4

      But that's the cons of dating a man who is older .That's why a lot of men like dating younger women ...with older women there's nothing new with them.

    • @Bri3w
      @Bri3w 2 года назад

      Okay! Say it again

  • @amarjotsingh8455
    @amarjotsingh8455 3 года назад +429

    I think it’s a control thing

    • @TheDommeOfficial
      @TheDommeOfficial 3 года назад +9

      It depends on the individual. A grown boy and a mature man differs. Yet, one can’t say that it is solemnly due to “control”. However, the reality is that it doesn’t apply to all.

    • @amarjotsingh8455
      @amarjotsingh8455 3 года назад +23

      @Chan Britt she’s one of those “fashionista” types that tony is talking about so I wouldn’t take her too seriously. Just bc a man is older with some money it doesn’t mean they are high value

    • @TheDommeOfficial
      @TheDommeOfficial 3 года назад +7

      @Chan Britt In my culture, it is common for Congolese and Angolan women tend to marry older men hence. It’s about the individual, as Tony Gaskin said : there is a difference between a grown boy and a man.

    • @TheDommeOfficial
      @TheDommeOfficial 3 года назад +12

      @@amarjotsingh8455 Ah beg you pardon? I think we are all entitled to share our opinions. And even if, we agree or disagree, let us respect each other. There’s no need to categories or insult a person you do not know. Have a blessed evening.

    • @realtruth3762
      @realtruth3762 3 года назад +13

      Chan Britt in 99% its for a bad reason (mentally/emotionally etc abusive narc. guys w little to no morals and just disgusting)

  • @vy737
    @vy737 3 года назад +50

    Come onnn!!!! "If you want financial security... get on your grind; And while you're on your grind and you're in the fields working, like Ruth, you're gonna meet your Boaz!" A word 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾

  • @misst72
    @misst72 3 года назад +132

    You have effectively described every man I've ever been seriously involved with. Every. Single. One.
    Insecure, immature, controlling, silly, old men.
    Gee, I wish I'd known about you years ago before I met these defective men.
    Thank you, Tony.
    Lord have mercy. Thank you.

    • @tya4662
      @tya4662 3 года назад +5

      Heavy on the “lord have mercy” in my case.

    • @yesihavealastname1562
      @yesihavealastname1562 3 года назад +4

      no offense, but what does it say about you if you're attracting these type of men?!
      black parenting can be VERY TOXIC and leads to damaged kids who then become damaged adults.
      maybe you have to heal yourself until you truly love yourself, and will then begin projecting the energy that won't attract dusties.
      OR, maybe i'm just misassuming, and there's nothing wrong with you, and you just had a string of bad luck regarding dating.
      either way, hope you find the person you want in the future.

    • @Igboman87
      @Igboman87 2 года назад +1

      @@yesihavealastname1562 Agreed

    • @stephonboykin1624
      @stephonboykin1624 Год назад +1

      ​@@yesihavealastname1562 No lies detected. If every man you were with was like that, maybe it's time to take a look in the mirror. I'm just saying.

    • @luyolomify
      @luyolomify Год назад

      @@yesihavealastname1562I think the creator of this content is also majorly projecting but it’s also apparent that he’s preaching to the choir.

  • @cozettem8226
    @cozettem8226 3 года назад +229

    Its an ego thing they are getting older and unattractive and having a woman half their age who is more attractive than they are is a self esteem boost. Plus they cannot keep women their own age they won't put up with their grown boy behavior, wandering eye, etc.

  • @annalisa_ASMR
    @annalisa_ASMR 2 года назад +28

    I was 21 dating a 56 year old man. Looking back on it i feel disgusted and repulsed but I honestly did not know any better and wish I could’ve loved myself and realized what I was doing. He was lacking control in his own life and that’s why he was attracted to me, because he knew he could control me. I thought he was different and an exception to the rule, but I found out the hard way that was not true. He exclusively dated girls 18-25 while being a literal old man. He was older than my dad but he gave me attention and told me things that made me feel like I mattered to someone meanwhile I was not even taking care of myself and doing the inner work and therapy I always needed. I now focus on working and getting my bag right, and spending time focusing on myself learning how to love myself first. No man could ever validate me anymore because I do that for myself. Anything an older man likes to promise he can give you are all things you can give to yourself if you do the work and love yourself first . Thank you for the video ❤️

    • @IamBarati
      @IamBarati Год назад +5

      ​@@RavenMarie2001 you learned. Choose your own age but choose right. There are many young men who'll end up like that53yr old you dated.

  • @joycesparks3777
    @joycesparks3777 3 года назад +116

    Amen . Man strength is in his gentleness. My husband was 12 years older than me. There was no baby/daddy mess between us. We respected each other. Being a survivor of the Vietnam War he was humble, sensitive, loving and patient. But don’t disrespect him or anyone is loved. And the people that new him knew not to cross him. I was very independent but he was sensitive to my needs and I was sensitive to his. And when his health started to deteriorate, I was there. Unfortunately, we both got Covid-19. He died in the hospital. I recovered at home. So my husband being 12 years older was good for me and a blessing. He died 7/31/20 at 76 the week of both our birthdays . July 27 and 28. I turned 64.

  • @agadonk
    @agadonk 3 года назад +129

    Please leave him. All of you. I wasted age 18-23 with a grown boy 11 years older than me. Any accomplishment you make, he will be resentful. He kept trying to trap me with a kid. Over 5 years, he went from a "good man" to verbal abuu, emotional abuu, then eventually physical abuu. Leave b4 it's too late. You are the prize. Watch all Tony's video and read the books. I wish i had this knowledge at that age. I would not have stayed past a year.

    • @beibei7176
      @beibei7176 3 года назад +6

      This is my life ... mine is 12 years older and resentful of every success I’ve had. Sadly, I have children with him.

    • @agadonk
      @agadonk 3 года назад +3

      @@beibei7176 your children need to see self love in a happy, healthy and whole mom. Wishing you and your family the best

    • @tiggalisa
      @tiggalisa 3 года назад +1

      True

    • @ritaaleksandrovna4518
      @ritaaleksandrovna4518 3 года назад +3

      Rule number 1 don’t rub your accomplishments in a man’s face. You are emasculating him by doing so and naturally he will be resentful. Let the man provide and lead and just relax into your femininity.

    • @ggkphilosophy
      @ggkphilosophy 3 года назад +1

      @@ritaaleksandrovna4518 correct!

  • @breannn8238
    @breannn8238 3 года назад +147

    This is so true. I’m 22 but I always attracted older men. I think it’s because we give them more excitement and stroke their ego.

    • @jordyaaaa2990
      @jordyaaaa2990 2 года назад +10

      Excitement to use you because they think you’re gullible and easier to be lie to

    • @themechanic7732
      @themechanic7732 2 года назад +17

      @@jordyaaaa2990 lies men prefer younger woman because they tend to be hotter and have less baggage and are less stressful.

    • @jordyaaaa2990
      @jordyaaaa2990 2 года назад +23

      @@themechanic7732 Nice to know you’re watching, hopefully you’re learning from Tony’s videos .

    • @nemoxx96xx58
      @nemoxx96xx58 2 года назад +39

      @@themechanic7732 lies! It is for sexual and perverted reasons has absolutely nothing to do with baggage. 🤢🤢bunch of disgusting predators

    • @themechanic7732
      @themechanic7732 2 года назад +2

      @@nemoxx96xx58 lies younger woman are better in every aspect compared to a older woman they have way less baggage , they tend to be hotter and happier than older females.

  • @akilahq6441
    @akilahq6441 3 года назад +30

    I felt that Tony..."Be on ur grind in the field like Ruth, and you'll find ur Boaz"

  • @Best-ThingYouNeverHad
    @Best-ThingYouNeverHad 3 года назад +29

    I get approached by older men most of the time and since watching you I tell them they are too old for me. Most get offended or try to talk me out of it. And the 2 times where I went against the rule I realized I should have stuck with my first mind. No men more than 5 years older. No exceptions.

    • @nessparadis6948
      @nessparadis6948 3 года назад +1

      Older men have been approaching me since I was at least 18. I was never attracted to them. Last year, I tried giving one a chance. He was 15 years older. After a week, I just couldn’t do it anymore. The age difference caused me too much anxiety. The next time an older man approached me, I was honest with him when he kept being pushy. I told him, I’ve tried being with an older man, it wasn’t for me. I have heard Tony’s video, but I am open to 10 years at the most.

    • @Best-ThingYouNeverHad
      @Best-ThingYouNeverHad 3 года назад +8

      @@nessparadis6948 I definitely have learned this one for myself as well. One of the guys even tried to convince me that I'm not going to find a mature guy at my age 🤣 turns out he was just as immature as a guy my age & was actually married to make matters worse & lying about his age. I found all of this out within the first 3 days doing a little digging.

  • @ashtonpatrice6137
    @ashtonpatrice6137 3 года назад +47

    I’m 30 and get hit on by older men all the time. I look a lot younger than I am and sometimes they look shocked (and slightly disappointed) when they find out my age. I was once turned on by this, but now that I’m a grown woman, I find it to be quite disgusting. Despicable.

    • @Vibes.562
      @Vibes.562 Год назад +1

      Same 😂

    • @theplasmacollider6431
      @theplasmacollider6431 11 месяцев назад

      That's just reality. You can be all hurt by this but women do the same when they are disappointed by the men they're interested in's lack of means.

    • @Vibes.562
      @Vibes.562 11 месяцев назад

      @@theplasmacollider6431 literally made no sense

  • @ritamoore9792
    @ritamoore9792 3 года назад +31

    This is so true. I have experience this. I was young and dumb. I married guy 14 years older than me. I Agree with Tony.

  • @mslove2913
    @mslove2913 Год назад +3

    Sir Bless your heart, I concur with all you are saying I was in a 10 yr gap difference for 12 years yes from 20's to 30's and I outgrew him. When tried to leave he called me every name in the book and found every reason to dumb me down. Until I prayed for strength, left and Never returned. He still alone to this day. Loving self is the best and waiting on God

  • @Best-ThingYouNeverHad
    @Best-ThingYouNeverHad 3 года назад +74

    The bible says growing old doesn't guarantee good sense 💯💪👌

    • @tiggalisa
      @tiggalisa 3 года назад +2

      😅😆😆🤣

    • @alwaysjolly1096
      @alwaysjolly1096 3 года назад +2

      Preach, I agree. Cause what matters is what a person brings to the table in a relationship. Age is number like quantity but quality takes it further.

    • @Best-ThingYouNeverHad
      @Best-ThingYouNeverHad 3 года назад +1

      @@alwaysjolly1096 💯

    • @newme572
      @newme572 3 года назад +1

      Babe I’m about to get in the word !

  • @queenofsound1304
    @queenofsound1304 3 года назад +14

    Glad I watched this video, I’m 23 and this guy I work with is 36 I thought he was 27 but no.That’s a 13 year difference . The way he acts around me I can tell he been plotting, thankfully I dodged a bullet lol uncle Tony ain’t lying💯

  • @RubyRoxxie
    @RubyRoxxie 3 года назад +21

    The ACCURACY and the perfect way you put this!!! 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽

  • @DimpledNatural
    @DimpledNatural 3 года назад +26

    I see it as insulting. Several men in range from 50s-70s have been interested and wondering why in their mind they would think a woman in her 30s would be interested in them.

  • @veelove2226
    @veelove2226 3 года назад +8

    You have two types of men, you have grown boys, and you have grown men, point blank period! Blessings TG to you and the Queen! 🙏🏾

  • @impressiveevents247
    @impressiveevents247 3 года назад +25

    Thank you God for Tony Gaskins Jr. Thank you Tony for continuing to be transparent with us women, the information you are providing is greatly needed.

  • @angiedee5124
    @angiedee5124 3 года назад +35

    I'm glad you put this video out. At my church there were men who were old enough to be my father that would flirt with me and try to talk to me. It was really disturbing.

  • @zerotolerencetonarc1902
    @zerotolerencetonarc1902 3 года назад +218

    You ain’t lying the narc I was with is now with a 21 yr old girl and he’s 38.... 17 yrs difference.....I looked at him and started laughing when I found out her age he was furious with me bc he wanted me to feel jealous.... Not jealous of a child potna bye 🐦 🧠

    • @joannasmith2670
      @joannasmith2670 3 года назад +51

      Thats just nasty. Someone go save that child. She looking for her daddy

    • @zerotolerencetonarc1902
      @zerotolerencetonarc1902 3 года назад +12

      @@joannasmith2670 He have her right where he wants her, she has family and older sisters they can tell her better but he prolly manipulated them too... I’m sure she is a hot in the ass girl bc real mothers would’ve been caught on to protect their kids from ppl like this

    • @zerotolerencetonarc1902
      @zerotolerencetonarc1902 3 года назад +9

      @@LA-wv7gf No there is 17 yrs age difference between him and her.... I was just stating that his son is 17 and how would his son look at his dad talking to a girl 21yrs old

    • @annadenise8902
      @annadenise8902 3 года назад +17

      Facts!!! Laugh at him. Go level up with a better MAN 💋

    • @zerotolerencetonarc1902
      @zerotolerencetonarc1902 3 года назад +4

      @@annadenise8902 Thanks 💃🏾

  • @Teemadison1
    @Teemadison1 3 года назад +75

    That hit hard when you said a “10 year old dating a new born “or a “20 year old dating a 10 year old”. I understand now. Thank you, Tony.

    • @luyolomify
      @luyolomify Год назад +4

      That’s a false equivalence, ya’ll will letch on to anything that strokes your egos.🤦🏾‍♂️

  • @inezlewis8573
    @inezlewis8573 11 месяцев назад +11

    They want a NURSE. And someone to CONTROL. Even if he has money... Don't Do It Ladies. He's sweet for now. BUT, his ATTITUDE will soon change. RUN!!!🏃‍♀️ 🏃‍♀️ 🏃‍♀️

    • @shabrethajennings7291
      @shabrethajennings7291 4 месяца назад

      Yep this happen to my sister now she's had to start working part time to take care of her much older sickly husband their whole marriage has been an issue especially with his health problems. I knew he tricked her because he wanted a care taker not a wife

  • @zionlucien9328
    @zionlucien9328 3 года назад +52

    Love how he said “he’s a pervert” and it went straight to commercial😂😂😂

  • @Ruth-vy1qj
    @Ruth-vy1qj 8 месяцев назад +3

    He is speaking the truth a lot of them I have seen got karma for taking advantage of women of all ages you cant continue to use people and not get karma.

  • @dawng3247
    @dawng3247 3 года назад +22

    "He's a pervert!" LOL, haha. Your delivery of that word was priceless.
    On a serious note, if all men are the same, or should I say, as you put it, fall into 2 basic categories, you have truly brought me clarity. I will " mentally" modify my thinking and understanding when it comes to relationships, to a point. You've provided nugget for me.

  • @rqueenwilliams9588
    @rqueenwilliams9588 3 года назад +60

    I became a woman when I discovered where my strengths laid and it didn’t lay in me being tough but it laid in me being vulnerable. It was weird at first and I tried hard to fight it because I’ve always been a tough chick but eventually I accepted this is what being a woman is all about and let me tell you now that I felt the freedom of vulnerability and sensitivity of a woman I don’t give a damn what anyone say about me and I don’t need to be tough, right, perfect because there’s nothing more freeing than knowing as a woman you can cry, fuck up, be wrong, and get broken and still be a beautiful, gentle, loving woman and nothing and nobody can stop it, now that’s strength 🙄 I will die a single black proud mother before I ever let another grown ass boy disrespect me, because nigga, I’m worth it and I deserve to be loved correctly!🖕🏾

    • @fredyvergara7597
      @fredyvergara7597 2 года назад +1

      Beautiful one question are you married ir are you engaged

    • @nikovasser6323
      @nikovasser6323 2 года назад +1

      Amen

    • @selfproclaimedesper778
      @selfproclaimedesper778 2 года назад +2

      I felt this shit in my spirit ❤️❤️❤️

    • @MayaONeil23
      @MayaONeil23 2 года назад +1

      These men are not cultivated to know how to love women. Look at the community of men today. This is why so many women are building security on their own. We've all had enough with these man-child behaviors.

    • @theplasmacollider6431
      @theplasmacollider6431 11 месяцев назад

      There's nothing wrong as a woman being feminine. This whole feminist agenda to make women men has warped women. Good for you. However, a bit of constructive criticism for you. Please don't use the kind of profanity you have in you're post. It's better to exercise more self control in how you speak and conduct yourself and will make you a better woman. Anyway, good luck to you in your growth.

  • @ElauntraSeoul
    @ElauntraSeoul 3 года назад +138

    Most of them want to groom young girls. When your young your less focus on commitment and your naive. Your more impressionable and easy to manipulate!! When I was 20 I was with a 37 year old man and got pregnant. Lawwwwd if I could go back and change it I wouldn’t cuz I have my daughter and she perfect but I wish I would of did things differently. And also men who date younger, really can’t find women there age who would even find them attractive/ will put with there childish ways.

    • @blackbeauty2781
      @blackbeauty2781 3 года назад +18

      Groom? Not even! At that age it’s all about his needs and wants.. Most mature women ain’t having the bs no matter what he looks like

    • @tateetaylorifics53
      @tateetaylorifics53 3 года назад +14

      This is truth. I was 19 dude was 44 and i have a son with him that he doesn’t take care of. I can’t change it however, i am getting closer and breaking chains by now every thing is making sense on why it occurred.

    • @ElauntraSeoul
      @ElauntraSeoul 3 года назад +7

      @@blackbeauty2781 I said what i said! & Yes, GROOM!! Obviously you need to further look up the definition of what groom means. When your young and especially a slow bloomer/ don’t really know how to date maybe because you weren’t allowed to under your parents roof and when your finally out on your own; no longer under your parents roof/protection.......your left to the wolves. Men can sense that and use that to there advantage. A man can make the young girl into who what he THINKS is a good woman and break her down till she’s weak/insecure and depends on him for approval because he’s “trained” her to be like that cuz she knows no better. Grooming means, “a form of abuse that involves manipulating someone until they're isolated, dependent, and more vulnerable to exploitation.“ or to “guide / making them into something”. Grooming has MANY different meanings, it just depends how you use it. For example Politicians, superstars, actors, business men/women, ect are all groomed to a certain image/role of something. Children are groomed by there parents. Your guiding that person to be someone you think they should be. It could be good or bad. & for a women to be attracted to man doesn’t necessarily mean only looks lol. That’s high school/grown girl thinking. To be attracted to someone takes a collective of things. There (personality, looks can be one, the way they think, there goals and ambitions. Ect.) Being attracted to someone is FAR from looks.

    • @blackbeauty2781
      @blackbeauty2781 3 года назад

      @@ElauntraSeoul .. How’d you get that response from my comment 🤷🏽‍♀️ and you also changed your wording and your immediate statement wasn’t that long lol 😒! My comment is not for the faint at heart or sensitivie individuals! And like I said, grown men are not in it to groom you.. Your life’s story wasn’t necessary hun

    • @irlandaise5631
      @irlandaise5631 3 года назад +1

      @@blackbeauty2781 yes I agree..I chase a 50 years man and im 37..but wanted marriage..he ghosted me..for a 25 I think that he moved in with and not married..when I was 20 I was mature and got ghosted a lot..long story short I have almost single forever..

  • @lisahinton9315
    @lisahinton9315 2 года назад +9

    Thank you for this. You are speaking the truth to me. This older man is pursuing me and it just feels "off" and listening to you, you validated why it is not setting well with me.

  • @KamuSaladi
    @KamuSaladi Год назад +8

    This left me feeling so spiritually naked, exposed and vulnerable. You’ve told nothing but the truth. I’ve loved this horror story. Thank God I managed to get away childless, nursing ‘only’ my spiritual and mental wounds. I will NEVER shortchange myself like that again. I am destined to live a prosperous and comfortable life regardless.
    Mindset of scarcity be damned!

  • @morgancain1130
    @morgancain1130 3 года назад +71

    This is all incredibly true because I just got out of one of these situations. Tony knows what he is talking about. As women we automatically think an older man is more mature based off of age which is NOT always the case! I’m 27, this grown boy is 36. There were so many red flags like him following and liking young college girls in early 20’s on Instagram. Then come to find out he had a secret tinder account where he was going to hook up with these girls! Ladies please be safe out there, stay prayed up, listen to your intuition, and keep getting new knowledge! Most importantly NEVER be afraid to walk away from someone who isn’t meant for your destiny! God will always replace with something better we just have to do the work and trust in him!

    • @ankrenam
      @ankrenam 3 года назад +2

      Ew did we date the same man-child?? 🤮🤮🤮

    • @themechanic7732
      @themechanic7732 2 года назад +1

      Lol all me n of any age do the same thing and all men love young woman all men of any age love young woman it is what it is...

    • @Igboman87
      @Igboman87 2 года назад

      Amen on the last part. Please believe there are still men in their 30s with genuine intentions dating women in their 20s. I recently turned 35, have no kids, not married, and don't exclusively seek women younger than me; I'm open to a certain extent. My limits in age at this point are no older than three years and no younger than 23.

    • @luyolomify
      @luyolomify Год назад

      ⁠@@themechanic7732there’s an old saying in English: “youth is beautiful”, which usually explains why most, not all, men (and women) are more attracted to a younger opposite sex, vis a vis. Assuming we’re talking about heterosexual relationships.

  • @annadenise8902
    @annadenise8902 3 года назад +93

    Makes a lot of sense. Once that young woman matures in the BRAIN and leaves him...he’ll trade her in for a younger model who he can manipulate. & the cycle continues. 😂 It’s hilarious

    • @sowhat616
      @sowhat616 3 года назад

      @Toni Denise what is you’re Instagram so we can DM I want too know you’re life story you seem like you sure have great stories too tell

  • @i_only_simp_for_myself800
    @i_only_simp_for_myself800 3 года назад +19

    I am 20 and I only date men close to my age cause I find them more attractive and Most older men that find women in their early 20’s attractive tend to only obsesses over these girls no matter how old they are themselves, so even if he’s 20 years older than you, there will be a day when you won’t be young enough for his tastes.

  • @Anon00113
    @Anon00113 3 года назад +14

    As a younger woman I’m sick of being hit on by old ass men. They even proposition with money. And I know too many other young women who use these guys while dating a guy their own age at the same time. Why don’t we stick to 5 years older/younger max? Because I don’t want an old guy but some really try to sell themselves with money. It’s not a real relationship. I think the 5 year older/younger rule is good

  • @michellehall4921
    @michellehall4921 3 года назад +82

    I know a man in his early sixties that go after women in their twenties or early thirties!🤮 He said he does not want an old woman🥴. But he old though! He has daughters older than that!🤦🏽‍♀️🤦🏽‍♀️🤦🏽‍♀️. So wrong.

    • @thelookout5802
      @thelookout5802 3 года назад +10

      He's on the blue pill...they turn out to be pathetic old men with health issues.

    • @evolvinglove7786
      @evolvinglove7786 3 года назад +3

      He probably got the worms. 😆

    • @joharilarosa6230
      @joharilarosa6230 3 года назад

      @@evolvinglove7786 lol

    • @tyeachildlove6032
      @tyeachildlove6032 3 года назад +1

      Don't judge all older men some are looking for something serious some men close to my age range act the same i don't find it wrong to like older men and want to get with em if they is want u like is more to a person than Just thier age

    • @a.k.williams9775
      @a.k.williams9775 3 года назад

      Me too...

  • @angelicagabrieli7169
    @angelicagabrieli7169 3 года назад +17

    Sisters, please listen to Mr.Gaskins. He’s telling the 💯 truth! Older men just want to control and manipulate younger women while having an other woman on the side and the audacity to think of themselves as a prize and a younger woman is just a housemaid and a cook.

  • @shariseverdine6818
    @shariseverdine6818 3 года назад +92

    This is a very interesting perspective. My husband is older than me and I absolutely love it! Honestly, I was bored with men my own age and completely DONE with younger men. My husband and I have an amazing relationship, so I feel we are possibly the exception to the rule (my opinion) We have a very strong spiritual compatibility, which helps us a lot in our relationship. I'm grateful for us, and it sort of baffles my mind how blessed we have been.

    • @mymakersdaughter6041
      @mymakersdaughter6041 3 года назад +33

      May I gently ask why you watch Tony’s videos if you have such an amazing relationship? Please don’t be offended, just wondering☺️. Because I would not be here if I was happily married.

    • @SixFootofFitness
      @SixFootofFitness 3 года назад +15

      @@mymakersdaughter6041 I don’t mean any harm either and I was thinking of asking the exact same question. 🤷🏽‍♀️

    • @blueocean1424
      @blueocean1424 2 года назад +1

      @@mymakersdaughter6041 😂😂💪🏾💪🏾🤦🏽‍♂️

    • @blueocean1424
      @blueocean1424 2 года назад +1

      @@SixFootofFitness 😂😂😂💪🏾🤦🏽‍♂️

    • @celeblashes1353
      @celeblashes1353 2 года назад +1

      I wanted to ask the same questions above.. why you here if your relationship so perfect?

  • @kenyaharrison2097
    @kenyaharrison2097 3 года назад +8

    My my my Mr Gaskins you are hitting the nail on the head i dated a guy who was 22 years older than me and u are truly helping me to understand the reason behind this man totally disrespecting me he doesn’t value my opinion at all as a matter of fact he doesn’t even want to hear my opinion he has told me why don’t you just shut up. It truly hurts to know that I actually loved him and thought he loved me but after listening to Mr Gaskins i am sure that love has nothing to do with his intentions but he will not be able to use me anymore cause i am out

    • @kenyaharrison2097
      @kenyaharrison2097 3 года назад

      I have experiences exactly what you are saying oh my goodness what you saying makes everything make sense that i went through while dating him i ended up leaving it wasn’t for me

  • @vchild
    @vchild 3 года назад +37

    I've never been into older men. But I know so many women who date and marry only much older men. And some end up being a nursemaid. Because of health issues that occur.

    • @BitterPeachh
      @BitterPeachh 3 года назад +3

      And lack of sex because of E.D problems.

  • @jellygurl27
    @jellygurl27 3 года назад +17

    Wow, I didn't know I needed to hear this until you said it. I trust your insight! When I think about it, a man must be insecure if he is choosing someone younger.

  • @ourtruth216
    @ourtruth216 Год назад +4

    He’s is 1000 correct! On so many points! The guy I’m dating now said he dates younger women because he think he’s immature, we’re 9 years apart. I would leave but I’m too far deeply I love with him. I know it’s dangerous but he treats me so well and he’s so smart he had a terrible past and so did I we don’t reflect that on each other but I don’t know . Everyone has problems and issues , he never mistreated me or makes me feel inadequate, we listen to each other …it’s been a year now idk know y’all.

    • @sagittariuslady2846
      @sagittariuslady2846 Год назад +2

      If he’s not controlling , manipulative , narcissistic, etc and not hurting you physically,mentally or emotionally I’d say stay

    • @ItsMaceo
      @ItsMaceo Год назад +1

      Live your life! If you’re happy that’s all that matters. This internet shit has nothing to do with your life.

  • @jd8229
    @jd8229 3 года назад +33

    I used to tell myself I want to be with an older man because I thought he'd be more mature (which I felt was true), but I wasn't being completely honest with myself because I may have turned away a mature guy closer to my age. Recently I discovered a man who is extremely mature and wise and his wife is actually five years older than him. They are happy and respect each other. So then I thought there may be something deeper than maturity for me wanting to be with an older guy.
    I realized there were fears that were influencing my attachment to be with an older man, and this video is confirming a lot of things I'm realizing lately. I am glad my mind has opened and I've opened my options to a man who is closer to my age. You're right women can think that a man closer to their age= less mature, but if he is mature, then what's the excuse? And if an age compatible and older man are both mature, the first case is actually better for a woman because with an older man there are higher chances of being widowed. So while women are going for an older man bc of the perceived pros, there are not that many benefits if you compare a mature young man vs. mature older man.

    • @yesihavealastname1562
      @yesihavealastname1562 3 года назад +3

      five years ain't substantially older tho. older really starts at ten years.

    • @Igboman87
      @Igboman87 2 года назад

      Great take on the matter

    • @Igboman87
      @Igboman87 2 года назад

      @@yesihavealastname1562 I would say even older than 10 years, more like 15+ for me.

    • @Rawyalty220
      @Rawyalty220 Год назад

      Wow your extremely self-aware. Great comment 👍

  • @wizlady7182
    @wizlady7182 3 года назад +7

    Tony I totally agree age does not equal wisdom.People do not believe this if a person doesn't seek to change they will stay the same.

  • @joi5787
    @joi5787 3 года назад +14

    💎Having knowledge and experience don’t mean you have wisdom, wisdom comes from God💎

  • @19Hollisterchick90
    @19Hollisterchick90 3 года назад +28

    I dated an older man. He often mentioned wanting total submission. It was more than me listening to him, it was literally him wanting complete control over everything including how I decorated my home. He was rich, but my now husband who is only a year older is richer🤷🏽‍♀️ Don't get with an older man for security, because that security comes with a lot of BS. Find you someone worth way more than what they bring financially.

  • @lneal2800
    @lneal2800 3 года назад +101

    This is great! "HE'S A PERVERT"

  • @polyv4814
    @polyv4814 3 года назад +9

    I met one. But I stand my own ground. I spoke up for myself. Now he's gone for good.
    This event happened before I found the clip. To be honest, I never ever regreted what I said to him. Then I found your video is so accurated. Many ppl struggled including myself because of this specific type of man is mentally malnipulative by verbal abused and their stoic mindsets. They dont want to grow.
    Your video gave me a strong confirmation. Thank you so much.

  • @HeyitsShalanday
    @HeyitsShalanday 3 года назад +55

    Tony, you got my mom hollering, “Tell it Tony!!” in the background😂😂
    Thank you for sharing your wisdom...this is definitely some of the same things my mom has been telling me over time.

  • @denizen9268
    @denizen9268 3 года назад +32

    Sounds good. I like having no man (or woman). I know no body asked, just saying being able to absolutely do whatever you want at anytime is so much better than dealing with a relationship. Just not worth it to me.

    • @yesihavealastname1562
      @yesihavealastname1562 3 года назад

      yeah, i'm a divorced man, and will NEVER get married or do relationships again.
      relationships have TOO much compromise, and people are too quick to throw away a relationship instead of fight for it.
      i get all the play from women i want by working as a bouncer, and i'm good.
      my focus is on my only son and myself, and that's it!

  • @Kaylagregg2076
    @Kaylagregg2076 3 года назад +48

    Glad you made this video other videos promoting dating older men make it seem like you about find Denzel Washington. Like tony said you getting insecure and manipulative men. Especially if you haven’t focused on your brand and he hasn’t either. He won’t inspire you, he won’t motivate you , he will feel low cus you have dreams and will diminish them. He is going to slow you down it’s not worth it.

  • @jackksterr
    @jackksterr 3 года назад +166

    Thank you so much for this video Tony! I just turned 24 & I caught myself dating grown boys who are in their 30’s. I had this surfaced level mindset that guys older than me are more “mature.” Aaliyah said it best, “age ain’t nothing but a number.” The last grown boy I dealt with was mentally & emotionally immature. Lived with his cousin & his best friend at the age of 33. & even told me he’d be upset if I was sexually active with anybody bc I haven’t given myself up to him yet. The min he said that, I burned that bridge w him & ghosted him like I owed him $5. I met him off tinder too (deleted that app & any other dating app) I refuse to let anybody’s dusty ass son use & manipulate me bc they’re trying to fulfill sexual fantasies. Disgusting! I’m taking your advice Tony & cutting my age limit to 5 years. If you’re older than that, you’re a pervert. Yes, there are exceptions but honestly, that’s just rare at this point of life. Going to be patient & keep working on myself till God places the right MAN in my life! Thank you for all the advice Tony!

    • @shelleydavis5231
      @shelleydavis5231 3 года назад +3

      You crack me up girl😂😂😂

    • @jackksterr
      @jackksterr 3 года назад

      @@shelleydavis5231 😅😅

    • @AiahVarh
      @AiahVarh 2 года назад +5

      @Jackie Hellesoe This is scary familiar because you literally described my ex. He also lives with his cousin and best friend, and is now 34. I don’t like talking negatively on others but that was the most emotionally abusive relationship I’ve ever been in. Kudos to you for seeing red flags in that guy and cutting him off immediately

    • @onesolejeanius3498
      @onesolejeanius3498 2 года назад +5

      I'm screaming you said I ghosted him like.i owed him.five dollars I just got kicked out of the library reading this lol

    • @kzariuscook1275
      @kzariuscook1275 2 года назад

      yeah and when you women get old yall secretly try and want to have sex with young attractive men. But then try to shame and call older men perverts for getting with young women. Hopefully God will never place a right man in your life.

  • @jessicamarks5577
    @jessicamarks5577 3 года назад +14

    Age does not guarantee maturity experience does . referring to men on average and knowing they take a long time to mature . concerning a woman it's takes time for a woman to learn her value to learn her worth and once she does she will not tolerate grown boy tactics it's not enough to sustain her she will get to were she will grow out of that right away once it's shown to her . nothing against younger women but it takes pain and loss and maturity to learn your value until then a grown boy will have a field day with your lack of mental development . But once you do come into learning your worth you will not tolerate a man's nonsense you will be able to decipher a mature man from a boy in a man's body . Thank you for your honesty in this video .

    • @nessparadis6948
      @nessparadis6948 3 года назад +1

      Not even that listen at the 29-31 minute mark. Experience that hasn’t been properly understood and reflected on is just experience.

    • @jessicamarks5577
      @jessicamarks5577 3 года назад +2

      @@nessparadis6948 well of course I'm referring to proper experience not just any experience .

  • @gerilong7380
    @gerilong7380 Год назад +1

    When I was in pain I use to disagree with you soooo much. Now with my healed heart, I really appreciate your messages ❤. Thank you for your honesty

  • @binspired7869
    @binspired7869 3 года назад +10

    Speak that truth! That’s why God blessed you, with a deserving wife, because you are genuinely; Christ like. Much respect to you, your family and the way God uses you.

  • @sharonnialarkins9205
    @sharonnialarkins9205 3 года назад +33

    Lets get into it. My man is older.... but there’s ONLY a 6 year gap but he’s absolutely amazing to me!

    • @thelookout5802
      @thelookout5802 3 года назад +6

      That's not older, you are in the same age group. It's usually 15years or more...

    • @sharonnialarkins9205
      @sharonnialarkins9205 3 года назад +1

      @@thelookout5802 I usually date a little younger. So this is new to me. So to me he’s old. LOL

  • @concernedcitizen8448
    @concernedcitizen8448 3 года назад +11

    OMG!!! You are describing my was-band of 20 years. Lord, I am so glad another man is speaking out about it. He was the type that believed that only other MEN outside the household was able to chime in about issues WITHIN our household. Tony is speaking the ABSOLUTE TRUTH...the kicker is that I met him at church! BEWARE BEWARE BEWARE

    • @mmommo10
      @mmommo10 Год назад

      thanks Concerned

  • @bougiegal2074
    @bougiegal2074 3 года назад +6

    There are content creators on You Tube who are telling older men to date young women in their ‘20’s. I’m glad you said all that on your video.

  • @jazminerenee4077
    @jazminerenee4077 3 года назад +63

    I love older men. I don’t take them serious when it comes to A relationship.

    • @marte1376
      @marte1376 3 года назад +27

      I love them too. I feel attracted for them and I love the power they make you feel because your presence is delightful in his eyes. Right now I'm dating a man on his 40s but our relationship is transactional, so It's not that bad. I really like this guy but I'm aware of how manipulative he can be, so that's what I'm watching these videos

    • @marte1376
      @marte1376 3 года назад +3

      @@sewblue187 dont worry, i guess some people is more serious and some just want to live the moment. Yes you're right, it would be complicated for an old man TO take seriously a young woman. I had a cold shower of reality this weekend

  • @kimberlydwilson6544
    @kimberlydwilson6544 3 года назад +17

    Tony i really appreciate what you are doing!! I was married to a guy 12 older than me. That wasn’t enough I dated a man 21 years my senior, I’m 39 and he just turn 60. In the beginning I really thought it was organic because you always came to my place of business. I really thought we had a connection, we started dating in October 2017 and I broke up with him October 2020. He abused me physically, mentally, verbally, emotionally, and finically. He is very insecure too. I have always been more mature for my age however, I’m not dating anyone who is not within an appropriate age range. Again thank you for what you are doing

    • @tinaryan7059
      @tinaryan7059 Год назад +2

      Had the same experience and he is now still looking for younger women ...can't be happy with an attractive intelligent women who brings something to the table . The man I dated ..was accusing , abusive and very immature and not very intelligent or interesting. He needed a younger woman because I truly believe deep down he never grew up. Old and searching women out due to his sick thoughts and ideas. I pulled his card and sent him packing . Just disgusting. Thanks for your input. I also think they are so insecure they are needing validation.

    • @kimberlydwilson6544
      @kimberlydwilson6544 Год назад +4

      @@tinaryan7059 you are absolutely right! My ex was dating a young girl whom could have been his granddaughter he was 61 and she 20. He was very immature, controlling, and perverted! I’m so thankful I broke up with him. However, the flesh gets weak but I have to remind myself I’m more worthy and don’t deserve him, I deserve much better

    • @tinaryan7059
      @tinaryan7059 Год назад +1

      @@kimberlydwilson6544 sister I am praying for us both . Broke it off with mine after finding him looking up how to get young women to talk to him on RUclips matter of fact. It's a little lonely . Figured I would throw myself into work . Just tired in my soul. Feel free to message me on here if it will let you . I always try to help like friends. We are woth diamond's and more rare than any precious stone according to God. Some people will never be just thankful. I want to marry my best friend next time. Here's to a good prayer and alot of faith !🙏

    • @ladybird491
      @ladybird491 Год назад

      Same thing here with every older man I dated, I will pass.

  • @dalebentley5312
    @dalebentley5312 3 года назад +7

    You are so right Mr Tony. Grown boys exist for sure.

  • @NDJ238
    @NDJ238 2 года назад +4

    I like this. The main take away for me is that a good man at any age would treat me like an equal. I've dated guys younger and older than me that acted like they were more superior and got mad when I called them out on anything. Thank you for this

  • @blueocean1424
    @blueocean1424 2 года назад +12

    That is why older men envy younger men with money because they know they can't compete

    • @BobJo-vp1qn
      @BobJo-vp1qn 4 месяца назад

      The majority of the older men that I know and am related to and associate with are ALL multimillionaires (MAJORITY!) Most are happily married and accomplished …which is how we know each other. But at 65 I can still tap out the majority of untrained men …regardless of age or size and many trained men who are “young.”
      I don’t know what delusional world YOU live in but their is absolutely NOTHING to “compete” for or about. But, in general, there is NO “competition!” Even if we’re talking exclusively about “younger men with money!”
      You see, one thing that both Warren Buffet and I learned long ago is that once you reach a certain level …money is no longer an issue and there truly is not a vast amount of disparity in what you’re able to have or what you’re able to do. In other words if I were to become a multiBILLIONAIRE and upgraded from being s multiMILLIONAIRE …what would change? …Absolutely *_NOTHING!_*
      My lifestyle would be EXACTLY as it is now. There is NOTHING that I need that I don’t already have. It would just be more money to give away. I would still be equally as frugal and down to earth as I am now. And my wife is the same way. Neither of us is easily impressed with material. In fact SEVERAL of the wealthy older men I know have dramatically DOWNSIZED their lifestyle and the size of their homes in order to live a simpler life.
      I know of NO “younger men with money” that ANY older man (who is a REAL man with money) could possibly “envy!” I find that those who floss the least often have the MOST and especially with young men …who so often are INSECURE and feel a need to prove something; with them, those who floss the most and are the most materialistic often have the LEAST!
      You are not even in the same LEAGUE so therefore YOU are not even in a position to “compete” because you are NOT even allowed to sit at the table if all you have is being a (snicker) “young man with money.” Lions don’t care about the opinions of antelopes.

  • @Lawyerbaejess
    @Lawyerbaejess 3 года назад +19

    I date older for maturity purposes. Between 2 to 7 years older. It’s just easier in my opinion because they have experience, maturity, and can advise on things. This is not the case all the time. But I have dated around my age. It comes with complications too.

    • @Jeanninecomeau
      @Jeanninecomeau 3 года назад +6

      2- 7 years IS around your age, unless you're 16

    • @flyleelee5351
      @flyleelee5351 3 года назад +4

      @@Jeanninecomeau I agree. 7 years is not that much older in mindset and life progress once you hit your 30s

    • @IamBarati
      @IamBarati Год назад

      That's not older lol.

  • @dianelogan8822
    @dianelogan8822 2 года назад +3

    I absolutely adore you! You admitting you may use words wrong and looking them up shows me you are being honest and real. And that is very hard to find . Thank you for being you.

  • @fayjones7918
    @fayjones7918 3 года назад +6

    Tony, I truly Thank God for allowing you to speak Truth to Women who need to hear it!! Keep speaking Truth I love hearing I’m from you. Many Blessings

  • @junkmail4756
    @junkmail4756 3 года назад +6

    OMG, this is my first Tony Gaskins video and I love it! The way he keeps looking up these words is cracking me up and winning me over!

  • @moralofthispodcast7138
    @moralofthispodcast7138 3 года назад +12

    This is 💯% spot on....