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Dumped By A Married Person?

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  • Опубликовано: 18 авг 2024
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    What to do if you have been dumped by a married person.
    Coach Lee discusses the difficult world of being dumped by a married person and why typical breakup advice doesn't work in this situation. Before you judge Coach Lee's motives in this video, be sure to watch it all the way to the end.
    While Coach Lee is not here to judge you, he will be honest and direct as is his usual style. As many have come to expect from Coach Lee, he will give you a lot to think about.
    If you have been dumped by a married man or a married woman, it is a different situation than a breakup with a single person. In this video, Coach Lee explains how it is different and how it could affect your future.
    Get Coach Lee's Emergency Breakup Kit at myexbackcoach....
    To Schedule A Coaching Call With Coach Lee, go to myexbackcoach....
    SUBSCRIBE To Coach Lee's Channel To Be Notified When He Has More Content On Breakups, Attraction, and Relationships in General.

Комментарии • 543

  • @nathy0308
    @nathy0308 5 лет назад +307

    The pain is unbearable. Thank you for this nonjudgmental dose of rationality.

    • @mocha1886
      @mocha1886 5 лет назад +66

      I know, I’m going through it myself right now. I wouldn’t wish this pain on my worse enemy

    • @LesDBN
      @LesDBN 5 лет назад +16

      @@mocha1886 me too :(

    • @kalsapower
      @kalsapower 4 года назад +18

      Tell me about it. It's been 9 months and she hasn't reached out and said in the first few months to move on and she doesn't feel the spark anymore and. I broke no contact 1 time and now I'm on 82 days no contact. It sux, I hope she comes back someday.

    • @tonykotsopoulos2942
      @tonykotsopoulos2942 4 года назад +22

      @@kalsapower this is the worst pain ive ever felt. Nothing i try works :(

    • @kalsapower
      @kalsapower 4 года назад +8

      4 years with my x and I never felt this about anyone, funny part is I probably would take her back if she came in to my life even after all the heart break and pain she caused me. When we broke up I couldn’t accept it and didn’t know about NC. I tried for months to get her back. First she was nice then she became angry then she said to just move on. I broke no contact like 4 months ago and she eventually stopped responding to me and said she went back to her Husband and wanted to work things out with him for the sake of the kids. I told her I will treat her kids like my own . But she didn’t care.

  • @congolaisrencontre8610
    @congolaisrencontre8610 5 лет назад +147

    Only video on RUclips, explaining without judgement, the depth on why is critical to move and never be involved with a married person. That should be good enough for everyone to understand that at the end of the day, it's hurt like hell to be an option or used. Thank you coach

  • @SuperMcdew
    @SuperMcdew 6 лет назад +199

    This must be the only video on RUclips on this exact subject - thank you so much 🙏🏻

  • @rosajimenez7777
    @rosajimenez7777 5 лет назад +68

    This coach is highly intelligent and honest.

  • @bitchpuhleese
    @bitchpuhleese 3 года назад +84

    I wish wish wish I had seen this video weeks ago before HE dumped me and I could have just ended it myself and not feel the terrible pain of being dumped by someone. This is THE BEST video ever and I will NEVER get involved with a married man ever again.

    • @danielajessup576
      @danielajessup576 3 года назад +6

      How did your situation turned? I do ME at this point. I dumped him only to reach out 2 days later where he dumped me...sorta of power play/control gain move. Since then we haven't spoken but he has my house key, obviously keeps it for control and as a reason for me to contact him.

    • @mattiereed4283
      @mattiereed4283 3 года назад +12

      Its Terrible dating a married man it never works out dont do It im glad I ran across this video im planning on ending my situation with a married man Screw him Move On His Controlling wife Can have him

    • @mattiereed4283
      @mattiereed4283 3 года назад +2

      Emergency Sex

    • @bitchpuhleese
      @bitchpuhleese 3 года назад +1

      @@mattiereed4283 this boat sailed about 9 months ago. Doesn’t even apply to me any longer.

    • @bitchpuhleese
      @bitchpuhleese 3 года назад +7

      @@mattiereed4283 run as fast as you can. It ended for me 9 months ago and I have never looked back. The slime bucket tried to come back like a boomerang and I kicked him to the curb, ZERO desire to ever be involved with him again, I moved on to another person who was single.

  • @annasan68
    @annasan68 4 года назад +49

    I’m a man and in this exact situation as you described. I must have said wow a dozen times listening to you. Feels like I lost part of me but I understand better now. Thanks for the non judgemental advice

  • @LorisLaboratory
    @LorisLaboratory 5 лет назад +79

    Thank you so much for treating this subject with dignity and no judgment. It was very helpful.

  • @cappygurl
    @cappygurl 5 лет назад +91

    Thank you for making this video without judgement. Life is complicated, no matter how much others might have their opinions.

  • @joshuaherrera439
    @joshuaherrera439 Год назад +15

    Wondering if you could revisit this topic again Coach lee, only if there is any additional information to add. I watch all your videos but this one is most tied to my situation. Thanks for all your advice. You truly help people

  • @elainenilsson5472
    @elainenilsson5472 5 лет назад +80

    I think we commonly refer to this as "using" someone.

    • @RealCoachLee
      @RealCoachLee  5 лет назад +23

      Yes, I agree.

    • @monahammond1776
      @monahammond1776 4 года назад +4

      That is what i felt when we decided to split and not see each other again

    • @brendaroberts1469
      @brendaroberts1469 4 года назад +15

      @@inge3819 I'm thinking that I wouldn't want anyone who would use me married or not
      Pull yourselves together and know YOUR value
      Forgive and move on. Remember that users are also LIARS.

    • @inge3819
      @inge3819 4 года назад +7

      Brenda Roberts Thanks for your comment, I told him what I wanted, so at least I stood up for myself but since this was the first time in my life that I did this, it was so difficult.

    • @monahammond1776
      @monahammond1776 4 года назад +2

      inges_toys inges_toys i am a believer and believe God is forgiving, but one thing i am sure of is God did not ask us to put ourselves in this situation. Actually the way i see it ‘ he got me out of this mess’ - anyways i am a fire sign - Aries - and tend to move forward and let go easily. Although this was not easy for me to let go, but i managed after a while and after consistent determination which i believe everyone can do.

  • @sitmengchue4077
    @sitmengchue4077 2 года назад +17

    Yes, this is a rare video. Topic not discussed by other coaches. Very good points made.Thank you, Mr Lee.

  • @jena.95
    @jena.95 2 года назад +41

    I am a widow. I was made to believe that I was loved and really cared for by this married man. 3 days ago he dumped me and told me he cannot leave his family. I was devastated. I feel so ashamed of myself for believing what he used to tell me...that I am the one he truly loves, that he wants to spend the rest of his life with me, and that he wants to grow old with me. It was all a lie. I am hurting and I am depressed.

    • @tarasteward3271
      @tarasteward3271 2 года назад +11

      Everything he told you was a lie.fprgive yourself ,never settle for a married man and move on.good luck!

    • @ImranKhan-tj3dr
      @ImranKhan-tj3dr 2 года назад +3

      I love u
      Really
      I like u I'm alone 🌹❤❤😍👧👧🌹

    • @celestehaynes8261
      @celestehaynes8261 Год назад +6

      Sis, I'm with you. I am a widow as well And I was duped by the Married guy that I got involved with. He told me he was divorced! After I found out he was married, He hung around me a couple of months before he finally went back to his married life and dumped me. I am a woman of faith and I do believe the Bible when it says that God makes provisions for the widows.. I feel sorry for his wife but that's her issue. I'm just glad that God gave me a way of escape and I pray God will heal you & your pain as well.🙏🙏🦋

    • @paulascott7670
      @paulascott7670 Год назад +4

      Read " Mistresses Survival Handbook"

    • @susanarsoniadou
      @susanarsoniadou Год назад +3

      Problem is that unmarried men are users too

  • @louisetaylor6952
    @louisetaylor6952 2 года назад +11

    This is not who you are, this is something that happened to you...you can put this behind you after you grieve for your loss...you can go forward with what you have learned and makea happy life because living well really is the best revenge...I wish you every happiness...

  • @michaelmarowitz9552
    @michaelmarowitz9552 3 года назад +54

    Such a eye opening video. I’ve been caught in this mess and this is so accurate to everything that goes on. It’s hard to move on but that is the only option

    • @leeannecarter844
      @leeannecarter844 2 года назад +3

      How long did it take you to get over you AP

  • @ST30809
    @ST30809 8 месяцев назад +5

    I was dumped a month ago (both of us are married). I tried to end it numerous times and he wouldn’t leave me alone. I finally took him back and he dumped me after seeing him again (we live 1000 miles apart). Horrible situation and I’m ashamed of myself for even starting it. Sometimes there are worse things than being lonely.

  • @danoles2k
    @danoles2k Год назад +12

    this really hits home, like its my warning to leave! im crazy in love with a married woman......what was supposed to be a one time hook up has now turned into a 6 year undercover relationship......a couple years ago she told me she loved me, I was very surprised at first but relieved at the same time because I felt the same way. We're both 41, and she's been with this guy since she was 18. its a loveless and sexless (so she says) marriage. She told me she has never loved or had such a connection with a man like she does with me, and the sex is BEYOND amazing between us......crazy passion unlike either one of us has ever experienced. As good as this is goin and feels.....deep down I feel like im setting myself up for heart break, even though she swears I'm the man she wants to be with and NEEDS in her life. I know I need to walk away but its just so hard when the two of you have 6 year history ( yes I know she has 20 something years with him) and such a powerful connection.....

    • @jannlewandowski5540
      @jannlewandowski5540 Год назад +11

      danoles2k. I read your story, and I've heard it before! I believe she does love you, but not the way she loves her husband. Everything is wonderful, and sex is Amazing. I believe she needs you for "different" reasons, for example, fulfillment. Her husband does not give her that. I know it's hard to accept, but she will not leave him. It's up to you if you want to spend your life with a married woman.
      I wish you the best of luck, but I want to say one more thing. Be careful, and take care of your Heart.

    • @MSDjMichaelSlash
      @MSDjMichaelSlash 11 месяцев назад +4

      Get boundaries. If She really wanted you She would dump her husband. Listem to the video until it gets on your mind. Speaking from experience...

  • @stephanie579
    @stephanie579 7 месяцев назад +4

    Getting involved with a married person is all about your lack of self esteem … ask why you should settle for less than what you deserve … you are being used this married person is using you to fulfill their unmet needs … a relationship built on lies and deception is doomed for failure … learn to love yourself enough and demand love and respect from all your partners

  • @BrendaBaBoom
    @BrendaBaBoom 2 года назад +8

    Obviously the married individual has way more options and backup than their single counterpart …. that’s called a RAW DEAL from where I’m from.

  • @Whiskeyshotglass
    @Whiskeyshotglass 5 лет назад +106

    What kind of relationship can you expect with a cheater? they will just cheat on you once they get bored.

  • @atommy4625
    @atommy4625 Год назад +8

    Not easy to cover such a taboo subject like this one. But you covered it well and said what many have experienced yet have no direction when it happens. You're the best

  • @helennamupala6636
    @helennamupala6636 4 года назад +18

    This is the most realest video on this subject matter on RUclips....loved it

  • @savvycollins6687
    @savvycollins6687 3 года назад +15

    Wow! Just Wow! Most brilliant words ive heard in a 13 minute time span. Thanks Coach Lee!

  • @ark.0616
    @ark.0616 11 месяцев назад +5

    No ,I don’t feel that I was dumped by him because it was my choice to let him go . I know he do loves me too but he also loves his family and I don’t want to compete with those things I don’t gonna win . This is not so connected to this at all but I just want to express my feelings as of now . I’m happy for him even it still hurts me . I know that we don’t have any future because he won’t feel safe with me compared to his wife whom he knew for many years . He’s happiness is what I always wish .
    Thank you for the video that you uploaded !

  • @lotusmccary9365
    @lotusmccary9365 10 месяцев назад +6

    Dont allow yourself to be used

  • @mecca115able
    @mecca115able 5 лет назад +44

    This is the truth. A man knows other men!

    • @BillCollins0707
      @BillCollins0707 3 года назад

      @Rylin Gough Yep, my spouse having her fun now, on my dime. LOL.

  • @rebar2506
    @rebar2506 2 года назад +9

    I've listened to this several times. So VERY TRUE but getting it to "sink in so I can stop the cycle" is a little harder. Thank you.

    • @natashadickson4819
      @natashadickson4819 7 месяцев назад +1

      Basically, a marriage is like pair of matching shoes for one pair of feet. There's no shoe for a third foot.

  • @ywang2417
    @ywang2417 3 года назад +12

    I wish i heard this 2 years ago. But even if i heard it 2 years ago, I wouldn’t have believed you. Had to die to believe it.. how sad

  • @coachevy2851
    @coachevy2851 2 года назад +22

    I've seen situations where the person does no contact on them and they get another side chick while still keep their wife. They cannot help having another person on the side besides their wife.

    • @ImranKhan-tj3dr
      @ImranKhan-tj3dr 2 года назад

      Hi ❤❤😍😍🌷🌷🌷🌷

    • @Amylynnklh900
      @Amylynnklh900 2 месяца назад

      so in this case, my he has everything, should I message his wife and her family about this dirty cheat?

  • @benitadavis659
    @benitadavis659 2 месяца назад +1

    You describe my situation exactly. Thank you. I am devastated been in agony over the break up was so in love with this married man . He is fine pretty much

  • @ZM-sm8it
    @ZM-sm8it 2 года назад +10

    It's very convenient for him to have two sources of fulfilment, free of charge.
    In another word, he is using you for his self ambition. Nice passion at the beginning, but it fades, and then he goes back to his spouse.
    But the poor spouse is not getting a good deal either.
    Such illusion for a lover

    • @gamwsas
      @gamwsas Год назад +5

      he will return to his spouse and all will pretend as nothing happened.

    • @Amylynnklh900
      @Amylynnklh900 2 месяца назад

      @@gamwsas so in this case, my he has everything, should I message his wife and her family about this dirty cheat?

    • @gamwsas
      @gamwsas 2 месяца назад +1

      @@Amylynnklh900 no. it doesnt worth it dear. it will backfire to you and you will be deemed as the villain of the situation. just step away. you may not find another one but i can tell you for sure he is not the one for you.

  • @Ayaa888
    @Ayaa888 4 года назад +51

    I do believe he will be back. Also I quit on this so called relationship just because after a while I finally got it, it's a dead end and I deserve a million times better. I will be doing no contact because I know this way I will heal in no time. Hopefully he won't reach out. After binging on your videos I feel soooooooo good!!! ;)

    • @RR-lx7ll
      @RR-lx7ll 3 года назад +11

      He always reaches out and its the same old cycle again. I don't want to be a gap filler, but the emotional control over me is far too great. And some how we have an amazing chemistry between us, especially in bed. But I think I need to put my foot down now... I can't do this anymore...it's too self degrading!

    • @panggingelvas1449
      @panggingelvas1449 2 года назад +4

      @@RR-lx7ll i feel the same way the difference between us we never had sex its more on emotional connection its been on and off for 10 or 9 years now....i hope il find the courage to end it now.

    • @RR-lx7ll
      @RR-lx7ll 2 года назад +3

      @@panggingelvas1449 You will. I did, though it was extremely difficult. But I said NO and though he made ways to come back, I stood by my NO. But even now, I get teary when I listen to our favourite song or pass by our favorite restaurant. But I can deal with it.

    • @panggingelvas1449
      @panggingelvas1449 2 года назад +4

      @@RR-lx7ll just thinking about it hurt so much..i cant talk about it even with my friends coz the discremanation in my society is different and we dont have divorce here so we dont really have a chance to be together....you were right my dear its going to be extremely difficult im sure with coz you see hs the only one who can make me truely happy....he's steering my emotion i cant decide if il give it a try to be real yet on the other side the moral, the self love and respect also have weight...he came back recently and his putting much effort and even lower his guard on emotional level much deeper level...its kinda like lets give it a try for the last time will see if its going to be a happy ending or a sad ending....

    • @MSDjMichaelSlash
      @MSDjMichaelSlash 11 месяцев назад

      ​​@@panggingelvas1449any news?

  • @marinaa7875
    @marinaa7875 4 года назад +23

    I just broke up. I thought mine was single like me and divorced with kids. After my ex husband cheated on me I vowed never to be that other woman and invade another woman’s family, but somehow I’d been hoodwinked into this role. Started to get suspicious why he never invited me to his place, he’d only text, never phone, we never went out, he wanted to take things epically slow, but the time we were together was amazing but eventually I realised what was going on. He’s still living with one child and the mother although they’re not married. I feel so deeply hurt I’ve had no choice but to walk away. I didn’t sign up for that.

    • @xuanwang4035
      @xuanwang4035 4 года назад +3

      Stay strong. You deserve someone who is emotionally and physically available for you. You deserve to be treated better and loved.

    • @MuhammadImran-ln4fz
      @MuhammadImran-ln4fz 4 года назад +1

      I am alone 🌷😍❤❤

    • @richardmccouch9144
      @richardmccouch9144 3 года назад +2

      Are you better now? I knew about everything, but still got played....the pain isn't any different though....

    • @maryamal-wahaibi8537
      @maryamal-wahaibi8537 2 года назад

      @@richardmccouch9144 I’m curious about what happened now

  • @JoshyBoi1221
    @JoshyBoi1221 2 года назад +17

    The worst is how good she makes me feel and how I can be myself around her and the chemistry seems amazing but we always go back to the discussion of me wanting more and her not leaving her husband. The emotional carousel is making me crazy

    • @RealCoachLee
      @RealCoachLee  2 года назад +11

      Living with a man in marriage makes her an expert at making you feel good and knowing what makes you tick.

    • @paulascott7670
      @paulascott7670 Год назад +5

      You're in powerless position, I was twice. It was horrible...

    • @jodaisy113
      @jodaisy113 5 месяцев назад

      … Oh .. I feel ya here

    • @karencorey476
      @karencorey476 4 месяца назад +1

      I'm almost out of this situation and it's terrible. Trying to move forward is really tough when geographically you're close. I'll never let myself get tricked into a relationship like this again. Yes I'm single.

  • @biopolis7
    @biopolis7 5 лет назад +17

    I can confirm, to the best of my personal experience, that your analysis is sound and complete. I will only add one thing: a married woman might also fill those areas with OTHER lovers available to her: "you disappeared? Well, let me call x, y..and so on". Is any worse case thinkable?This way the impact of your absence on her life will be approaching to 0. Still, you have no best option than stop any contact. Sad, but you totally are on the losing side of the game. On the other hand, destroying "the big picture" you had of her may be easier and of significant help.

  • @connihutton2739
    @connihutton2739 2 года назад +8

    Hi, Lee, I totally get it
    And it's not fair that he is only going to feel a slight breeze of this. And I'm feeling the hurricane. Thanx

  • @prisonpov
    @prisonpov 3 года назад +24

    I got dumped by a married woman and everything you said is dead on thank you I love all of your videos actually

  • @dusenstrahlverfahren
    @dusenstrahlverfahren 6 месяцев назад +3

    Wow, this is incredibly similar with what happened to me. She left me, after begging I went NC and since 40 days I havent contacted nor heard back from her.

  • @firsttenor76
    @firsttenor76 Год назад +8

    Just don't be the 2nd option, or a dopamine dispenser for anyone. Find someone loyal.

  • @salescustomer-service2050
    @salescustomer-service2050 5 лет назад +9

    Coach Lee, you need to do a video on a person who is separated but on the brink of finalizing their divorce only to break up with you. Tell us does no contact with that situation works? Or, do a video on how to have a person claiming to be in the middle of divorce show proof its the fact.

  • @marthaclayton2457
    @marthaclayton2457 4 года назад +15

    I dated a guy who was going through a divorce. After one year nothing happened with his divorce. So I broke up with him.

  • @vidarebornlonewolf
    @vidarebornlonewolf 5 лет назад +34

    This is the first video of it's kind I find and I thank you so much for it. I went no contact when she broke up with me and went as far as deleting my FB, Messenger, and stopped going to places she frequented. Is like I disappeared from the face of the earth and what I did was start working on myself. I know she still lives with him, but whether the marriage will last for the rest of their lives, is unlikely. I just want to hear from you if I did the right thing by completely erasing myself from her life when she broke up with me. It still hurts, but I been doing so many things to work on myself and try to move on. I just wish I knew if she misses me like I miss her. We went out for 1 year, but knew each other for about 4 years, but only as friends. She showed like one day she would be serious with me, but when they started talking about divorce and lost her full time job, she started backing off and asked me for space. One week later, she texted me that it was over, but wanted to still be friends. I did not respond and erased myself completely.

    • @MMm-le7jj
      @MMm-le7jj 5 лет назад +13

      You are doing the right thing -
      Keep going
      Yes we are all human - unless some mental issue - the woman will be missing you . But not enough to drop everything to be with you. . Keep doing what your doing - Move on ....

    • @apizzaboy9011
      @apizzaboy9011 4 года назад +8

      Be you bro.. just pray for her if you really love her.. move on with kind heart.. if you miss her just think she's happy what she made.. so accept that and respect her.. god bless you bro

    • @justinstegner6164
      @justinstegner6164 Год назад +6

      I’m in the exact situation 4 years later and I’m beginning to accept it but it hurts so bad. I know it won’t work out, I’m just left so puzzled and in pain that someone could just use me like that, and that I allowed my self to be used. Fml

    • @corvettequeen11
      @corvettequeen11 Год назад +2

      You are feeling the sense of loss as Coach Lee states in one of his videos. It is a powerful feeling but you also learn from it.

  • @tainahernandez4825
    @tainahernandez4825 2 года назад +2

    The guy I dated wasn't married and said he was single and that he was done with his ex. Turns out I was his rebound and eventually secretly started seeing her again once she was available. He kind of withdrew and I found out they were back to together one morning when I received a random text msg from an unkown number. The message advised " that I stop talking to this guy". I was hurt, I realized it was his ex and that was her way of letting me know she was back in the picture as he never did. It was kind of what coach said, he just wanted to keep me orbiting just in case. He then ghosted me once he knew that I knew he was back with the ex. It was very painful, I dated this person for a year and in the end I got nothing but lies and ghosted. Coaches advice was spot on. The person that has someone is playing a different game. So even if they aren't married please do your research and make sure that the person you are seeing has fully healed and moved on from the ex.

  • @dawnowens1951
    @dawnowens1951 Год назад +6

    No going back to any relationship that is non fulfilling!

    • @kerrymillar1267
      @kerrymillar1267 4 месяца назад

      Most times relationships are non fulfilling because people stop making an effort. If two people got married/ long term the chances are there was high compatibility at one point.

  • @LadyEconomist
    @LadyEconomist 3 года назад +10

    This was very helpful, thank you ! Yiu confirmed my own thought regarding a situationship a married man is trying to lure me into. I told him that I don't share and if he wants me he should get divorced.

    • @ImranKhan-tj3dr
      @ImranKhan-tj3dr 2 года назад +1

      I like u
      Merry me
      I m alone ❤❤😍😍🌷🌷🌷

  • @celestehaynes8261
    @celestehaynes8261 Год назад +5

    Well done!! Excellent! You nailed it!!

  • @zonywest4262
    @zonywest4262 Год назад +4

    This happened to me and I feel completely relieved!!!

  • @divya9127
    @divya9127 5 лет назад +20

    I love you coach Lee. This video has changed my life. Thanks till a million stars.

  • @tamerakennedy6893
    @tamerakennedy6893 Год назад +3

    Safe place. I needed this. Thank you.

  • @FETFAZIDIS
    @FETFAZIDIS 3 месяца назад +1

    This video brings me back to reality

  • @williamthomas7284
    @williamthomas7284 4 года назад +16

    Shes married, and after 2 years, dumped me, the pain is intense, I cant eat or sleep, I hurt so badly, never thought I could cry for days, and my jobs falling apart on top of it, omg, what a huge mistake....😭😭

    • @Hir0-Protagonist
      @Hir0-Protagonist 4 года назад +12

      This probably wont make you feel any better but know you're not alone. I'm in a very similar situation right now. It's absolutely gut wrenching. The pain is worse than any relationship I had with a single woman. I dont know what i was thinking. This has been going on for 2 years.

    • @A2Kaid
      @A2Kaid Год назад

      You guys are fools, you knew it wouldn't end well.

  • @adamoart211
    @adamoart211 3 года назад +9

    DON'T go back to them! At the end of the day they are going to stay married and you'll just be the person to fill the voids in their life. Everybody deserves a full relationship, not half of one

    • @herobelieve824
      @herobelieve824 3 года назад

      Hello I got my lover back to me with the help of Dr Wilson he helped me return my lover back to me in less than 48 hours he can help you instantly to get your ex lover

    • @herobelieve824
      @herobelieve824 3 года назад

      Message him on WhatsApp...

    • @gamwsas
      @gamwsas Год назад

      she needed a honey moon period and it faded. now that shes not horny anymore you are of any use. her stable caring and loving husband is an asset especially if she has kids. if she loved you she d be with you right now.

  • @HauntedAbysss
    @HauntedAbysss 2 месяца назад +1

    I learned this the hard way. I wish I knew this ahead of time. We were exclusive and suddenly she broke up with me. I wasn't sure if no contact would work... I'm glad to have this verified. Well I'm pretty SOL

  • @fizharoon6353
    @fizharoon6353 3 года назад +5

    According to many psychologists "Never fall for a married man

  • @Rise.Shine25
    @Rise.Shine25 8 месяцев назад +3

    You save my life ❤

  • @ingridhaughney3645
    @ingridhaughney3645 3 года назад +9

    The attached/married guy keeps a safety net going with his Wife/Partner. Sadly, the single person has usually no safety net.
    Ghosting would really not hurt the attached/married person as they just have their legal partner to fall back on.

  • @edward9161
    @edward9161 3 года назад +8

    Damm right on point i like this girl but i have to let her go its affectimg all areas of my life and she will never leave her boyfriend for me good advice its time for me to move on

  • @jasonarokiaraj9817
    @jasonarokiaraj9817 3 года назад +6

    Actually, the no-contact technique works effectively on the engaged or married couples just to get them back as a friend and maybe only as a friend and nothing more.

    • @lifeisbeautiful3019
      @lifeisbeautiful3019 3 года назад +2

      What abt those married men who nvr loved their wives , compromising whole life ,had arranged marriage,divorcing soon(3-4 years ) ?

  • @marvinponce243
    @marvinponce243 3 года назад +5

    This is very helpful and informative.

  • @anneroarty6473
    @anneroarty6473 3 года назад +8

    Lee you are spot on.. I dated a married guy he was still with his wife they had no children. I was not in a sexual relationship but he used to do other sexual things outside the body. He bought .e a sex toy I was disgusted and gave it back to him and went no contact. Yes what he was ot getting from his marriage he was filling the void with me. He only came in two evening a week. I was totally brainwashed no excuses that is what happened. Never ever again.

  • @julieyio
    @julieyio 3 года назад +31

    50% of marriages end up in divorce today. Not everyone marries because of love and people don't wanna stay in unhappy marriages forever. Just saying never say never, there's always a chance.

    • @lifeisbeautiful3019
      @lifeisbeautiful3019 2 года назад +2

      Thanks 🙏

    • @jrbb7165
      @jrbb7165 2 года назад +2

      Always a reality.

    • @mb285
      @mb285 10 месяцев назад +1

      This is a positive comment..Appreciate it ❤

    • @kerrymillar1267
      @kerrymillar1267 4 месяца назад

      And second marriages are a 75% fail rate. People take themselves with them and if they cheat that person has HUGE issues

  • @moonlover7568
    @moonlover7568 3 года назад +11

    What if both people are married
    😣

  • @Badjujucrew
    @Badjujucrew 14 дней назад +1

    I am so heart broken. No more. I’m gone.

  • @sofiyaivanova9069
    @sofiyaivanova9069 Год назад +4

    I also struggle 9 month already, feel like I died, everything hurts.

  • @weavie82
    @weavie82 3 года назад +16

    Had a relationship with a woman in an open marriage. We fell in love. Head over heels for one another. Her husband found out about the “feelings” but she never admitted to him about us being “in love.” He made her cut off all contact. I know she loved me. She didn’t want the stigma of divorce. Or shame from friends and family. Just like that she was gone. She told me if she didn’t try and make it work with him she wouldn’t never be able to live with herself. I’m so broken right now. And I know this had disaster written on it from the start

    • @johnscuderi1614
      @johnscuderi1614 2 года назад +2

      Can I ask how you are doing now. Im actually going through this at the moment. It isnt fully over but I feel like its going to be. Same as you I met this woman and we basically had a soul connection right away. We both developed feelings and because I was the first guy she had been with in their open relationship when she told her husband she had been sleeping with someone he flipped and said they probably shouldn't do it anymore. That was a few days ago so I have no idea where this will land but I just have a feeling its going to end as these things usually dont go well for the 3rd person. It probably would anyway in the long run. Im curious how you have dealt with this situation? Are you doing better? I hope so because my stomach is in knots just at the thought of her having to leave my life forever.

    • @alisaiful6717
      @alisaiful6717 2 года назад +4

      Less than 3 % married women leave their marriege for their new lover.. Its a waste of time

    • @gamwsas
      @gamwsas Год назад +2

      @@alisaiful6717 and if they leave its even a worse deal for you

    • @alisaiful6717
      @alisaiful6717 Год назад +1

      @@gamwsas Forbidden fruits alway forbidden no matter what..

    • @Surfsup448
      @Surfsup448 Год назад +2

      @@johnscuderi1614 People usually have affairs with no intention of leaving their spouse. Part of the excitement is sneaking around . Once they get caught and the husband threatens divorce, she will stop the affair. Is she financially independent? Do you make as much or more money than her husband? Let’s figure this out.

  • @sprinkles3960
    @sprinkles3960 4 года назад +9

    dang this exactly my situation thanks so so much for the video~

    • @TheRealAlove
      @TheRealAlove 3 года назад +1

      What was the outcome

    • @sprinkles3960
      @sprinkles3960 3 года назад +1

      @@TheRealAlove we talk every now and then but nothing more than that

    • @TheRealAlove
      @TheRealAlove 3 года назад

      @@sprinkles3960 add me on ig if you wish the_real_alove

  • @ddouye3969
    @ddouye3969 11 месяцев назад +2

    I was so pained that I had to call his wife to expose him when I noticed he became distant... I regretted calling her though. I begged him for 3 weeks but he refused said he didn't trust me more

    • @Amylynnklh900
      @Amylynnklh900 7 месяцев назад +1

      I did the same thing with my co worker I had my friend tell his wife in a message. Me and him didn’t talk for 4 months, I felt guilty and told his friend I needed to say sorry. The friend told him and he actually told me to text him and no need for an apology he knows what he did and “promised” then we started the affair again with everyone at work knowing. Now we’re trying to be friends considering it’s not going anywhere still

  • @payat4417
    @payat4417 4 года назад +5

    I need this so badly 😭😭😭😭

  • @menchiecorrea2500
    @menchiecorrea2500 4 года назад +6

    I am in this situation right now.I barely find it so hard to move-on.
    We're communicating, and we're doing good.His telling me his missing me a lot.but since covid lockdown that his wife is again w/him, again.
    Then so suddenly he didn't communicate.., it's been 1 & a half month already and he didn't evwn texted me..and i doing that no contact also.for i knew his married.
    I need to show him tjat i still value myself..though it hurts a lot.i still respect his discision...though i am missing him a lot😥I need to stand firm and strong ..
    Thank u for your video lee..i been looking for this. ❤😥

    • @mariansue4107
      @mariansue4107 4 года назад +5

      Go out and date somebody else. It will help. And pray alot.

  • @sunflowerane8065
    @sunflowerane8065 3 года назад +6

    I keep repeating cauze its really help me. And as what i see he is the only one that i can rely on in this content

  • @rosemariedimonte
    @rosemariedimonte Год назад +1

    Coach Lee I Wouldn’t Mind Having U In All Areas That U So Gracefully & Honestly Speak Of
    Ur A Sweetheart Thank U 🙏 For Ur Caring Kind Advice😇
    MAY MY LORD GOD BLESS U❤🌹DIMONTE ✊🏻🤗

  • @jennifermayer2708
    @jennifermayer2708 Год назад +1

    You are so right about being a married man's mistress is filling a role in a married man's life. Especially the married traveling businessman who needs you for sexual gratification during lonely nights while he is on the road.

  • @helennamupala6636
    @helennamupala6636 4 года назад +5

    No judgement whatsoever..

  • @juliageorge551
    @juliageorge551 3 года назад +3

    Fortunately, I have worked through a lot of the pain process and he has told me he doesn't love me, never said it, that he is best not to come and see me again for my sake and II should be free - so easy for him after 2.5 years on and off!!! I don't know if he is married for sure, as he wouldn't tell me but I only ever saw him at lunchtime or late arvo never at night (I am not stupid) he wouldn't tell me anything about his life either so I could likely never affect his other life - how sad :-( I fell for him regardless which is bad I know but you can't control who you fall for - he used to say so many things like don't fall for me, don't get attached, don't love me etc etc I just dismissed it - he was being honest cruelly so in retrospect!!!

  • @A1Foodsco
    @A1Foodsco 3 года назад +4

    M in luv with married man from 13 years... The pain is horrible... Whenever I try brkup I fall in depression... Life is sick...

    • @lee-rentiaarnoldus4500
      @lee-rentiaarnoldus4500 3 года назад +1

      Good luck 💕it's not easy road , allow yourself to go through everything good and bad feelings during this times,I'm going on week 10 walking away and I still feel crap, Christmas passed with no wishes sucked big time

  • @2012donavan
    @2012donavan 5 лет назад +5

    Noooo smh... 😔💔 i lost hope now. For years she did this to me. She not married but she does have 2 kids for him. They dont live wit each other but she's scared of him cause he threatens her. I don't know what to do now after watching this.. im gonna keep NC going an just try an move on. 💔

  • @YoYo-pn6pv
    @YoYo-pn6pv Год назад +3

    Married woman tried to get divorced for me after 3 year affair but I told her no. Took her too long so I knew it would t be healthy relationship. Don’t start relationships with women who say they are “separated “

  • @Who63
    @Who63 5 лет назад +16

    Actually he said I was sprinkles on the cake....whatever that means. Never again. And it's only been two weeks. Thank you.

    • @cherp5837
      @cherp5837 3 года назад +4

      Hurl a slipper on his face and say at least u are sprinkles u are worth a slipper

  • @aaronramsden1657
    @aaronramsden1657 2 года назад +4

    This is tricky, I just broke up with a gf who recently got divorced, but she left the ex husband for me, I feel like I was the rebound and it sucks

  • @Layerlol
    @Layerlol 5 месяцев назад +1

    When you're dealing with a married person, Please don't involve your feelings at all. That is a lost cause

  • @rebeccajohnson3324
    @rebeccajohnson3324 4 года назад +5

    Coach lee. He left her for me and divorced her. They were married for 19 years. They still live in the house together as it is up for sale and has not sold. They live in the same house for financial reasons and I trusted that because they did divorced. He went through with the divorce for us to be together. Now he has dumped me saying that he needs to work on himself as he never did that after divorcing her. He wants to find the things that make him happy. He hasn't been happy in so long he said. Was I just a rebound or did he really care? I thought he did and now he completely pulled away. He told me on a Friday night he loved me and called me the next day to say he was not in love with me. I'm trying the no contact and it is very hard. I never thought this would end.

  • @ChristopherEdwardsstoicmime
    @ChristopherEdwardsstoicmime 2 года назад +6

    Damn. This is my situation.

  • @andrella7748
    @andrella7748 4 года назад +7

    yessssssssssssssssssssssssssss i needed this Coach lee

  • @pineapplep7103
    @pineapplep7103 5 лет назад +10

    Wow, you are awesome, I wish i watched this video before 😪 I wouldn't live all that painful situation, I "dated" my ex boyfriend while he was in a relationship (I'm not proud of that and i would never recommend to do it because it ends awful) , he always said he was miserable, unhappy, and that he was just waiting the right time to leave his gf, and be with me again, suddenly he just "broke up" with me by phone call, said he was sorry but he made his decision (dumping me), after that he blocked me from every social media, and six months after the dumping a friend in common told me that he got married, with obviously the same girl he was "trying" to leave. I was frustrated, angry, but never reached out to him again and not planning to, I'm just moving on, I finally see that I'm not a second option, that he is a horrible person, and now i know what to do if he ever reaches out, just tell him to f* off (english is not my first language, sorry for grammar mistakes) love your channel!

    • @congolaisrencontre8610
      @congolaisrencontre8610 5 лет назад +4

      Great job, don't give in ever again, the pain and shame isn't worth it at all

    • @tarasteward3271
      @tarasteward3271 5 лет назад +2

      watch knowing the narcissist 's video -''why does a narcissist go back to EX''.

  • @campingforayearrenoheart5908
    @campingforayearrenoheart5908 4 года назад +36

    I couldn’t imagine dating someone that was married I feel bad for everyone!
    So stop and have boundaries
    ( do not date / sleep with married people)

    • @camellia8625
      @camellia8625 7 месяцев назад

      Maybe you have never fallen in love with someone who is married or separated

  • @babeako5826
    @babeako5826 3 года назад +7

    Thank u I badly need this I hope I can move ON 😢

  • @velmtz7444
    @velmtz7444 5 лет назад +6

    hi coach lee, thank u so much for all these amazing advice. it's helping me to get through my situation right now. although i'm not sure of where to write my comment to get a good advice cuz my situation is so diff from the rest. my bf left me last thurs. he is an arab, and part of their tradition is the "arranged marriage" which they can't refuse especially if the arranged was made by their mother. chances are, their family will not accept him as part of them if he disagree. he doesn't want to get married. he told me he doesn't want to lose me but he also doesn't want to lose his mother. he said her mom told her that if he doesn't marry his 1st cousin, he will be no longer be accepted as his son. being the youngest son, i know how difficult his situation is right now. he told me he doesn't even sleep in their house. sometimes in the park cuz his mother always asked him to drive the girl going to their house & going to the girl house. i love him so much, but i can't do anything about it. im from diff race, & i don't think that his family will accept me. last thurs we were together, his mom called him to pick the girl again. he said he will stay with me. i told him i am letting him go to his mom, its really hard but i can't do anything. he told me he will go, then the situation get weird. he run & i run after him until i fell down the stairs. i was begging him to stay. i even broke my leg. he get back to my room & trying to call emergency but i said no. what he did is he run again & leave me with my broken leg & bruises. i block him from whatsapp after i sent him a bit of a msg. Just yesterday i found out he blocked me from whatsapp & ig. until now i haven't heard from him. i want to do the NC but problem is we work at the same company. I know some ppl here will tell me to move on or some will say something bout the traditions, pls ppl i just want some support because what i am going through now is just not that easy. i don't think NC will work for me. his wedding is scheduled Jan 2, 2019. and i dont have enough time. Please coach help me out.. i don't know what to do.

    • @congolaisrencontre8610
      @congolaisrencontre8610 5 лет назад +1

      What happened since then, if possible before providing some help

    • @lifeisbeautiful3019
      @lifeisbeautiful3019 3 года назад +2

      So heartbreaking
      🤧🤧🤧🤧🤧
      I think u moved on dear
      Ur well now Ryt ?

  • @bluemnm
    @bluemnm 5 лет назад +10

    What if the mistress dumps the married person and the married person is heartbroken because he was genuine in the relationship and whats the mistress back and actually build. Future with them
    Will no contact work?

    • @RealCoachLee
      @RealCoachLee  5 лет назад +7

      If she misses you enough, yes. Basically the same rules apply.

  • @richardmccouch9144
    @richardmccouch9144 3 года назад +3

    My god.....so glad I found this. It explains so much. It has also made me realize....would this then happen to me?

  • @adelfaingusan7397
    @adelfaingusan7397 3 года назад +2

    Coach Lee thank you for opening my eyes..

  • @hotpink000
    @hotpink000 4 года назад +6

    Gosh. Thank you for talking some sense to my stupid ass brain

  • @SmoothOperata
    @SmoothOperata 3 месяца назад

    Im in this situation. Never heard from her for 1.5 months now. We initially agreed to not fall inlove but it was unavoidable. SHe suddenly broke up with me without clear explanation. It was tough

  • @Sharon-777
    @Sharon-777 3 года назад +2

    Excellent advice thank you

  • @flower_7890
    @flower_7890 5 лет назад +4

    Thank you very much for this video x

  • @poetrycorazon
    @poetrycorazon 3 года назад +6

    My friend is so blind, I keep telling her all this information. She thinks her situation is different, such a cliche.

  • @theartistwithafearofelevat1382
    @theartistwithafearofelevat1382 21 день назад

    So painful. He broke up with his gf to be with me but made up with her within a few days. Absolutely crushed

  • @clavdig
    @clavdig 3 месяца назад

    See, she told me she told her husband she was done with the marriage 4 years ago, and I thought both were free to date, but I was kept a secret and neither of them have made plans to leave each other. Kids are involved which I think is the reason. I just wish people wouldn’t give out the vibes they are single yet have no intention of having a serious relationship.

  • @locks4u2c
    @locks4u2c 11 месяцев назад +1

    Very true, thank you.

  • @chiefhood
    @chiefhood 2 года назад +3

    what if they are both married???? and they have no plans to leave their spouses, and are still in love for years?

  • @alexm5986
    @alexm5986 5 лет назад +4

    Thanks for your work

  • @michellawarren1715
    @michellawarren1715 2 года назад +1

    As Lee said:. I SERVE A PURPOSE. I think I have fullfilled him, I think I have stopped him from yelling at his wife and being difficult to live with in the family home...hence why he needs me ...but the wife seems to be O.K with it as he's eldest kids.

    • @gamwsas
      @gamwsas Год назад

      how true. same as here. but you can reverse that by going full no contact and ignore him in order to restore previous situation