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Top 5, from the perspective of age 40. 1. GENUINE Kindness in deeds and words 2. Inquisitive mind / intelligence with a recognition that this universe is vast and no one knows everything, and that even what you think you know could be incorrect and that’s ok! 3. Emotional vulnerability and safe space to be vulnerable 4. Resilience/ perseverance when life doesn’t go as you expected 5. Quick wit, good humor, and a willingness to be silly together You’re right I could keep going!
When he listens and cares for my needs, he is willing to put effort in the relationship, he wants to spend quality time together, he has great values, he is faithful, kind and generous..
My top 5 qualities- 1- has good morals & integrity (is virtuous 2- works on his own self growth 3- has a job or is financially independent (not reliant on me) 4- is NOT a follower, but rather a free thinker 5- is a protector, stands in his masculinity, but is also aware of his feminine side (snag lol). I've been dating this man for a month now, that has all these qualities & many more. He is teaching me how to stand in my femininity (because I don't need to be in my masculinity when he is around). He is showing me how a man should treat a woman (though I've always known & wished for, I've never had it). The smallest things like opening my car door or holding hands r just natural to him, but mean so much to me, they blow my mind. After listening to this, I know he is falling in love with me already as he does or has spoken of everything that has been said in the podcast. ❤ I feel like I'm the luckiest girl alive, he keeps telling me to get used to it as he isn't going anywhere ❤
Five of the most beautiful qualities.... self-sacrificing, caring,able to work through conflicts, honesty and knows how to have fun. Thank you for letting us in your knowledge ❤
My husband and I have been married 26 years and he has been doing all of these things lately, it's crazy. Getting dinner for me on days I work, coming into my office between his meetings, taking me to Aruba in a few weeks, encouraging me with my new career. He's been planning our future, the grand kids that we have always wanted (our oldest just got married.)
5. Good to people and animals 4. Actively engaged in authentic interests and pursuits 3. Lifelong learner 2. Rational, intelligent, gives good mind 1. Sincere in words and actions
How much effort he puts into fix a disagreement open communication, self control, confidence, humble personality, loyalty and honesty, his word how trustworthy his words match with his actions. Also how supportive he is when I feel down or stressed out or frustrated does he enjoy putting me down or he is prompt to talk and found ways to make me feel better, in something really important the way he use my past actions to give me a constructive positive feedback or using my mistakes or my past experiences to put me down
Such heartwarming examples of love. Im coming to terms with the end of a relationship that was confusing and not loving. While its a sore grief, it is comforting to be reminded what real love looks like, and that it could yet happen for me. Thank you Mat
The problem with all these is in the beginning, they show all these signs but deep into the relationship they loose almost all the qualities. Not reliable, not honest, selfish, don't pay attention nor listen, not transparent. I deal with it by giving back the exact same qualities 😅. I stopped being caring, loving, respectful, kind and I'm even selfish now. Garbage in Garbage out. I don't have any more time for being the one fixing the relationship everytime. The other person has to do it this time if they don't like it
I prefer sensitivity when he's being vulnerable. It tells me he not in his vulnerability just for himself, but is truly vulnerable when being sensitive about the moment, our feelings, the care and needs for us both. That way his vulnerability is not just for show, but sincere, only after he's discerned it would be safe because we've established trust.
First…. I absolutely love the story you shared about your wife and yourself on that Valentine’s Day. It literally made me cry so beautiful.💗💗💗✨👑 Qualities 1 must love GOD, elderly, animals & children 2 must be a caring loving person 3 LOYALTY ***✨👑 and that he is a good communicator 💗 4 has to have a sense of humor I Love to laugh 5 must Love and respect my Family and my circle
Top 5: 1. Absolute Fidelity 2. Intelligence 3. Empathy/Kindness 4. Provider Energy 5. Protective of me and of our relationship/Not letting anyone or anything put wedges into our relationship. Bonus: Really handsome
He has the 10 Sign the plan for our first date is in progress soon to be in August i am excited and nervious also .coming to a cross thr coutry n to meet me is such a big huge effort he has .
How did it go? I recently reconnected with someone from my past and we are both single again. He's making a lot of these efforts. We met in person for a couple days. He's already trying to figure a way to see me again. My life is messy right now though, and his loss is still pretty recent. But I feel hope for the future for the first time in years
Ive dated plenty...none of the guys I dated wanted to do any of those things for me. Very little effort put in, criticized when I didn't wear makeup (hardly ever happened), didn't make special plans for me. I was doing most of the work...and I'm talking 50 dudes or so who I dated over a 10 yr time frame. All they wanted was sex. So shallow.
Maybe wear less makeup and you might not attract those types? I never really learned how to put on makeup so I don't much wear any And men are still interested. Even at 16 guys seemed to appreciate that I didn't wear too much makeup "like the other girls". My ex husband called me a cheap date because I didn't like wasting money. Perhaps a man sees a woman with a lot of makeup and thinks she'll be high maintenance or shallow or something. Please don't take this the wrong way. I've just never really liked to wear makeup. I'm 65 now and just reconnected with a man I dated at 18. We met for the first time in over 40 years a couple weeks ago. And he's already trying to figure out how to see me again. I didn't wear a speck of makeup. Didn't even dress up He was a gentleman and didn't lay a hand on me. Not even a hug. We just talked
@recoveringsoul755 I wear very little makeup. Wearing makeup or not wearing makeup has very little to do with dating. There are very few men out there who are good and even worth dating. I'm not saying there aren't women out there who aren't a piece of work either. As mentioned, I've dated plenty, and most of them were narcissists. Glad you divorced your ex. He sounds peachy. Hopefully this man you've rekindled with isn't a jerk, too.
Great question. I'd love to see Mat's answer. My best guess would be timing. If it's early in the relationship, and maybe even frequent I'd say it's love bombing. If it's later (like Mat's example was six months in), it makes sense for where they are at in the relationship, then grand gesture is more likely. Hopefully Mat or someone on his team answers though. 🙂
You might not know right away, but red flags will appear. My ex lovebombed me..I thought " wow", but next showed red flags...was a narcissist. If you read about it, and see any signs, leave right away.
Hi Mat, I loved this video, thank you so much for talking about it. While I care and expect several things from my partner and our relationship, I think the most important to me are we stay honest, loyal, respectful and loving to ourselves and to each other, I want us to be each other´s best cheerleader. I would like to ask you if you can talk a bit about long distant relationships, me and my partner are in one now and sometimes it gets hard. I know that he feels the same for me but he can deal with this situation better than me and I´d like to meet him at the same level. I feel I´m too short sighted and he can see beyond the fog. Thank you!!
dimostra gratitudine, sa essere felice, partecipa attivamente nella vita di famiglia, partecipa attivamente nella vita della comunità nella quale vive, sa proteggere i propri familiari e le persone deboli in comunitá
What if he has does qualities and he just won't communicate for days and when ask why? he'll just say calling n talking frequently isn't his thing but doesn't mean he don't Care, this is very confusing @mat bog Anyone with similar experience?
Please pay more attention, if he does those things but doesn't communicate for days, something is wrong, so he may just be trying to convince you but he hasn't got the feeling to give it his all... Hope you can figure it out soon..
Firstly I want a man who is a follower of the Lord Jesus Christ, a man who will pray with and for me (and others), whose core values align with mine, and secondly, I want a man who is a masculine force of nature. This allows me to live naturally within my feminine gentleness and I love the dynamic of having a protective leader to be with and support. Thirdly, I want a man who will argue respectfully with me, and not shout me down or bulldoze over me like I experienced growing up in my family with a narcissist mother and doormat enabler (emasculated) father. Fourthly, I want a man who will ask forgiveness, and will welcome my requests for forgiveness, when we hurt and disappoint each other. Fifthly, I want a man who is able to bond with me, and truly love me, who will treat me with respect and dignity -- as I will him. (No narcissists, in other words). That's a man who I can respect and admire, and everything else after these essential aspects of his character are icing on the cake. It can all be discussed and worked out together.
Far out Mat, I’m welling up about the story of Valentine’s Day for you and Irene 🥹 I know I always say this, but thanks for sharing your stories. I know that what you guys have is real, and it helps my broken heart believe in love again. Thank you guys ❤
![I.N "HALLUCINATION" | [Stray Kids : SKZ-PLAYER]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/n5B5q1Hwt_U/mqdefault.jpg)
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Top 5, from the perspective of age 40.
1. GENUINE Kindness in deeds and words
2. Inquisitive mind / intelligence with a recognition that this universe is vast and no one knows everything, and that even what you think you know could be incorrect and that’s ok!
3. Emotional vulnerability and safe space to be vulnerable
4. Resilience/ perseverance when life doesn’t go as you expected
5. Quick wit, good humor, and a willingness to be silly together
You’re right I could keep going!
Honest,
Loyal,
Trustworthy,
Self-reliant &
Respectful
When he listens and cares for my needs, he is willing to put effort in the relationship, he wants to spend quality time together, he has great values, he is faithful, kind and generous..
Five Must Haves - Christian, respectful, transparent, works through conflict, and a romantic
My father treated my mother this way..... it was beautiful. Never happened for me. Times have certainly changed.
Kind, Humorous, Loyal, Hardworking & Chivalrous
Honest.
Loyal.
Funny.
Respectful.
Patience.
Kind
Genuine
Protective
Good sense of humor, lighthearted
Outwardly loving, emotionally available, mature
Effort, patience, persistence, positivity, presence, strength of character, consistency, humility, compassion and respect 🤷♀️
Respectful, good sense of humour, kind, good-hearted, loyal
My top 5 qualities-
1- has good morals & integrity (is virtuous
2- works on his own self growth
3- has a job or is financially independent (not reliant on me)
4- is NOT a follower, but rather a free thinker
5- is a protector, stands in his masculinity, but is also aware of his feminine side (snag lol).
I've been dating this man for a month now, that has all these qualities & many more.
He is teaching me how to stand in my femininity (because I don't need to be in my masculinity when he is around). He is showing me how a man should treat a woman (though I've always known & wished for, I've never had it).
The smallest things like opening my car door or holding hands r just natural to him, but mean so much to me, they blow my mind.
After listening to this, I know he is falling in love with me already as he does or has spoken of everything that has been said in the podcast. ❤
I feel like I'm the luckiest girl alive, he keeps telling me to get used to it as he isn't going anywhere ❤
Loyalty, trust, sincerity, compassion for others and of course love
Five of the most beautiful qualities.... self-sacrificing, caring,able to work through conflicts, honesty and knows how to have fun. Thank you for letting us in your knowledge ❤
Oh gosh, my guy of 5 months does al of these...we are older, and I've waited a long time.
Congratulations & continued blessings 🎉
I'm so happy for you
I’m in the same place and situation
So happy for you!
Thank you Mat. As always, great video and helpful content. Top 5 non-negotiable qualities: Kindness, Integrity, Trustworthy, God-centric, Responsible.
My husband and I have been married 26 years and he has been doing all of these things lately, it's crazy. Getting dinner for me on days I work, coming into my office between his meetings, taking me to Aruba in a few weeks, encouraging me with my new career. He's been planning our future, the grand kids that we have always wanted (our oldest just got married.)
5. Good to people and animals
4. Actively engaged in authentic interests and pursuits
3. Lifelong learner
2. Rational, intelligent, gives good mind
1. Sincere in words and actions
How much effort he puts into fix a disagreement open communication, self control, confidence, humble personality, loyalty and honesty, his word how trustworthy his words match with his actions. Also how supportive he is when I feel down or stressed out or frustrated does he enjoy putting me down or he is prompt to talk and found ways to make me feel better, in something really important the way he use my past actions to give me a constructive positive feedback or using my mistakes or my past experiences to put me down
If you've never been loved and you (now) know it, clap your hands
Clap
Such heartwarming examples of love. Im coming to terms with the end of a relationship that was confusing and not loving. While its a sore grief, it is comforting to be reminded what real love looks like, and that it could yet happen for me. Thank you Mat
Thank you for your illuminating videos! ;)
5 qualities:
- self-reflectiveness
- mindfulness
- respectfulness
- persistence
- positivity
Sense of humor, smart, sexy, caring/thoughtful, knows how to listen
Humility, integrity, emotionally mature/curious, cares for my needs, a good listener.
The problem with all these is in the beginning, they show all these signs but deep into the relationship they loose almost all the qualities. Not reliable, not honest, selfish, don't pay attention nor listen, not transparent.
I deal with it by giving back the exact same qualities 😅. I stopped being caring, loving, respectful, kind and I'm even selfish now. Garbage in Garbage out. I don't have any more time for being the one fixing the relationship everytime. The other person has to do it this time if they don't like it
kindness, generous, honest, humerious, valiant
Honesty
Trustworthy
Man of his word
Valiant
Humble
Such an amazing love story! Made me cry. Love to you and your beautiful families. Xo ❤
I prefer sensitivity when he's being vulnerable. It tells me he not in his vulnerability just for himself, but is truly vulnerable when being sensitive about the moment, our feelings, the care and needs for us both. That way his vulnerability is not just for show, but sincere, only after he's discerned it would be safe because we've established trust.
First…. I absolutely love the story you shared about your wife and yourself on that Valentine’s Day. It literally made me cry so beautiful.💗💗💗✨👑
Qualities
1 must love GOD, elderly, animals & children
2 must be a caring loving person
3 LOYALTY ***✨👑 and that he is a good communicator 💗
4 has to have a sense of humor I Love to laugh
5 must Love and respect my Family and my circle
My God! This is sweet and fairy-tale like ! One thing I liked was ... ". ..the unplugged version of you!" Thank you, Matt! 🙏🍂👠👍💖🍃
Outstanding, thank you, Matt.
I'm feeling very blessed by your advice and that my guy is showing these. I love your podcasts. ❤
Top 5:
1. Absolute Fidelity
2. Intelligence
3. Empathy/Kindness
4. Provider Energy
5. Protective of me and of our relationship/Not letting anyone or anything put wedges into our relationship.
Bonus:
Really handsome
Another quality video. Thanks Mat!
5 qualities - honesty,respectful, hard working, ambitious, caring.
Matt I love your energy here
Awesome, Mat!!
Warm hearted
Introspective
Teachable
Integrity
Responsible
You little Devil Mat! You are so Romantic 😊 Fly down for Valentine's Day Really Made her Happy 🎶🤗🎶 🌹
Sane sane sane and sane.
5:27 That story made my eyes tear up 😢
Honesty loyalty caring faithful attentive ❤️😊👍🏻
The coffee shop shutting down ❤❤❤❤❤❤
He has the 10 Sign the plan for our first date is in progress soon to be in August i am excited and nervious also .coming to a cross thr coutry n to meet me is such a big huge effort he has .
How did it go?
I recently reconnected with someone from my past and we are both single again. He's making a lot of these efforts. We met in person for a couple days.
He's already trying to figure a way to see me again.
My life is messy right now though, and his loss is still pretty recent.
But I feel hope for the future for the first time in years
Christian-Loves Jesus, Loyalty-Faithful-Committed, Trustworthy, Honest, & Loves me and the family we'll create together forever.
Honest loyal unconditional love
Gentleman
Communication
Ive dated plenty...none of the guys I dated wanted to do any of those things for me. Very little effort put in, criticized when I didn't wear makeup (hardly ever happened), didn't make special plans for me. I was doing most of the work...and I'm talking 50 dudes or so who I dated over a 10 yr time frame. All they wanted was sex. So shallow.
Maybe wear less makeup and you might not attract those types?
I never really learned how to put on makeup so I don't much wear any
And men are still interested. Even at 16 guys seemed to appreciate that I didn't wear too much makeup "like the other girls".
My ex husband called me a cheap date because I didn't like wasting money.
Perhaps a man sees a woman with a lot of makeup and thinks she'll be high maintenance or shallow or something.
Please don't take this the wrong way. I've just never really liked to wear makeup. I'm 65 now and just reconnected with a man I dated at 18.
We met for the first time in over 40 years a couple weeks ago. And he's already trying to figure out how to see me again. I didn't wear a speck of makeup. Didn't even dress up
He was a gentleman and didn't lay a hand on me. Not even a hug. We just talked
@recoveringsoul755 I wear very little makeup. Wearing makeup or not wearing makeup has very little to do with dating. There are very few men out there who are good and even worth dating. I'm not saying there aren't women out there who aren't a piece of work either. As mentioned, I've dated plenty, and most of them were narcissists. Glad you divorced your ex. He sounds peachy. Hopefully this man you've rekindled with isn't a jerk, too.
These are all signs of a guy making effort. How about a video when he slows that down and gets too comfortable.
Question - how to spot a difference between grand gestures coming from his heart and love bombing?
Yes I recently came out of a 3 yr relationship where I thought he was in love with me but he just ended up being a narcissist...
I can't listen to the rest of this rn...it's too painful.😢
Great question. I'd love to see Mat's answer. My best guess would be timing. If it's early in the relationship, and maybe even frequent I'd say it's love bombing. If it's later (like Mat's example was six months in), it makes sense for where they are at in the relationship, then grand gesture is more likely. Hopefully Mat or someone on his team answers though. 🙂
You might not know right away, but red flags will appear. My ex lovebombed me..I thought " wow", but next showed red flags...was a narcissist. If you read about it, and see any signs, leave right away.
So concerned to not fall for narc again.
Hi Mat, I loved this video, thank you so much for talking about it. While I care and expect several things from my partner and our relationship, I think the most important to me are we stay honest, loyal, respectful and loving to ourselves and to each other, I want us to be each other´s best cheerleader. I would like to ask you if you can talk a bit about long distant relationships, me and my partner are in one now and sometimes it gets hard. I know that he feels the same for me but he can deal with this situation better than me and I´d like to meet him at the same level. I feel I´m too short sighted and he can see beyond the fog. Thank you!!
I'm at 3:17 and starting to realize a man has never been in love with me. And I'm 37.
If he’s guarding you to be sure those who are keep on eyeing with you and if he’s bringing music about wedding
Loving
Loyal
Attentive
Funny
Spontaneous
dimostra gratitudine, sa essere felice, partecipa attivamente nella vita di famiglia, partecipa attivamente nella vita della comunità nella quale vive, sa proteggere i propri familiari e le persone deboli in comunitá
What if he has does qualities and he just won't communicate for days and when ask why? he'll just say calling n talking frequently isn't his thing but doesn't mean he don't Care, this is very confusing @mat bog
Anyone with similar experience?
Poor communication, not a good sign.
Not communicating is not Your thing sister. 🙏🏽
Please pay more attention, if he does those things but doesn't communicate for days, something is wrong, so he may just be trying to convince you but he hasn't got the feeling to give it his all...
Hope you can figure it out soon..
@@carlacoelho7690 I hope so
Honest.
Willing to communicate. Funny.
Romantic.
Believes in God, christian.
Supportive
Fun
Respectful
Romantic
Emotionally intelligent
Firstly I want a man who is a follower of the Lord Jesus Christ, a man who will pray with and for me (and others), whose core values align with mine,
and secondly, I want a man who is a masculine force of nature.
This allows me to live naturally within my feminine gentleness and I love the dynamic of having a protective leader to be with and support.
Thirdly, I want a man who will argue respectfully with me, and not shout me down or bulldoze over me like I experienced growing up in my family with a narcissist mother and doormat enabler (emasculated) father.
Fourthly, I want a man who will ask forgiveness, and will welcome my requests for forgiveness, when we hurt and disappoint each other.
Fifthly, I want a man who is able to bond with me, and truly love me, who will treat me with respect and dignity -- as I will him. (No narcissists, in other words).
That's a man who I can respect and admire, and everything else after these essential aspects of his character are icing on the cake.
It can all be discussed and worked out together.
Why is no. 5 so hard? Where are the men supporting and trusting enough to be willing to support their woman like that?
Ick. What are you doing in bed with a guy if you're not sure he's in love with you? (Guy gets up to check the lock...)
Far out Mat, I’m welling up about the story of Valentine’s Day for you and Irene 🥹 I know I always say this, but thanks for sharing your stories. I know that what you guys have is real, and it helps my broken heart believe in love again. Thank you guys ❤