Joey Diaz Returns Blankets He Never Bought

Поделиться
HTML-код
  • Опубликовано: 31 дек 2024

Комментарии • 292

  • @XSuddenxSwagX
    @XSuddenxSwagX 4 года назад +364

    “Plan A is K-Mart, Plan B is I rob this guy” LMAOOOOO

  • @sangpark5323
    @sangpark5323 4 года назад +584

    Joey Diaz is the reason K Mart failed.

    • @jaykid7835
      @jaykid7835 4 года назад +2

      🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

    • @youtuber6185
      @youtuber6185 4 года назад +11

      Some little old ladies lost their stock investments and some 20
      Year veteran employees lost their job and retirement. So then Jory becomes famous and rich and laughs all the to the bank like a doctor.

    • @josephrios4940
      @josephrios4940 4 года назад +5

      Maverick Life okay ? Should I be sad about that ?

    • @youtuber6185
      @youtuber6185 4 года назад +8

      Joseph Rios You should be but you’re not. I try to do the right thing even when nobody is looking. It’s an issue of character. For example, if I found your wallet with $1000 I’d return it to you. That’s just how I roll and how I was raised.

    • @dorianunderwood554
      @dorianunderwood554 3 года назад +3

      @@youtuber6185 I thank the lord for great people like you man

  • @iamcamila888
    @iamcamila888 4 года назад +239

    "If you can smell a fart with a mask on, you did a good job" Joey Díaz 2020

    • @CJ_YT.
      @CJ_YT. 3 года назад +2

      legendary

    • @jugo3702
      @jugo3702 2 года назад +1

      This comment gone blow up stupidd😭

    • @tylerjames0229
      @tylerjames0229 Год назад

      @@jugo3702not yet

  • @cez2775
    @cez2775 4 года назад +186

    Start the day with uncle joey

  • @sangpark5323
    @sangpark5323 4 года назад +142

    6:23 Joey farting and doing the mask thing is one of the hardest I've laughed in a while.

  • @dannyb20vtec28
    @dannyb20vtec28 4 года назад +103

    Just got off work at 4am. Uncle Joey time baby! Let’s go!

  • @Fencepost55
    @Fencepost55 4 года назад +76

    “And I would watch people.. throw away receipts...... you know what an ambulance chaser is..?” 😂😂😂 you can tell he himself is amazed at the balls he had to steal

  • @sharkny1580
    @sharkny1580 3 года назад +19

    "Chasing Receipts" 😂😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣🤣😭😭😭😂😂😂🤣🤣👍🏾👍🏾👍🏾

  • @ΒΞΔΝ
    @ΒΞΔΝ 4 года назад +207

    Scams as a troubled teen in the 90's
    1. Home Depot no hassle returns. - Walk out with a small expensive tool in an always busy store, come back the next day and return it for cash. No receipt, no problem.
    2. Stop & Shop savings card - Pick up receipts off the ground outside the market, keep the ones that did not get savings, take them inside to customer service with your savings card, and get the cash difference.
    3. Walk for Hunger - Stand outside a mall, shopping center, high traffic area and ask for pledges with your walk for hunger sheet. Collect people's money, and simply never fill out and send in the registration card. Few hundred $$ a day.
    4. Circuit City free gaming consoles - Buy a new gaming console , take it home and replace it with a friends broken console, return the broken console packaged like new with their no hassle policy. They did a quick open box to see what is there, and give you your cash back you paid for the new console. Looks like the same console, none the wiser.

    • @jprz3837
      @jprz3837 4 года назад +71

      I just did the broken electronics return on a new 75” I had bought 6 months ago. Got drunk one night, watching a fight I bet on and threw the remote and broke the liquid in the LED but no crack on the screen.. bought a new one and returned the broken one like a fuckin docta.

    • @skreign
      @skreign 4 года назад +49

      I once got a xbox 360 circle scratch (The one you would get from moving your console while it was running) on my copy of gta 4. I went to blockbuster, rented gta 4, swapped the disc, and kept the blockbuster one. RIP to whoever got my fucked up disc.

    • @ryleyeaton7349
      @ryleyeaton7349 4 года назад +7

      Black Acura simple yet effective

    • @Henry-uv9xu
      @Henry-uv9xu 4 года назад +9

      Black Acura Man, Blockbuster, Xbox 360, and GTA 4. A simpler time.

    • @userrrrrr9507
      @userrrrrr9507 4 года назад +14

      Me and my boy go to the target near my high school and there’s so much people we can just take laps around the store opening food and eating shit to cure the munchies 😂🙏🏿 haven’t been cought since freshman year lol

  • @ericl2105
    @ericl2105 4 года назад +129

    “Whistle while you work, Hitler is a jerk”.

  • @generationx9294
    @generationx9294 4 года назад +58

    Watching this while running on my treadmill has my knees buckling and me tryin' to catch my breath from laughing 🤤
    .
    "..and you hurt yourself how?":
    "I had no idea the effect this episode would have on me" 😭

  • @maryyjanee247
    @maryyjanee247 4 года назад +44

    Joey putting stores out of business lmaooo

  • @Southpaw_canvass
    @Southpaw_canvass 4 года назад +68

    I lost all my extremities soon as Joey put that fan on Lee jesus christ

  • @BigSnipp
    @BigSnipp 4 года назад +33

    I used to do the changing room deal where you wear the clothes out underneath the ones you came in. Stole my whole homecoming suit piece by piece.

    • @joeskiluv2661
      @joeskiluv2661 3 года назад +1

      🤣

    • @steamingdeuce868
      @steamingdeuce868 3 года назад +5

      That's Tremendous!

    • @prometheusjackson8787
      @prometheusjackson8787 2 года назад +1

      I used to work at Kohls and they didn't pay anything and the managers were all post menopausal sociopaths. So I'd always steal because I restocked. Only worked seasonal. I probably stole like 25% of what I made

    • @Hopper-gn2ej
      @Hopper-gn2ej 9 месяцев назад +1

      even the jacket?? The pants?? Incredible, just walking outta the store with two pairs of pants on

    • @BigSnipp
      @BigSnipp 9 месяцев назад +1

      @@Hopper-gn2ejYep, even the jacket. I think I wore a hoodie over it. Pants were baggier in the 90s, so it wasn't too hard to hide the dress pants.

  • @snowmishima3311
    @snowmishima3311 2 года назад +9

    “Give some to Lee” 😂😂😂

  • @Lueyj
    @Lueyj 4 года назад +36

    Joey "whistle while you work" Diaz

  • @aleiterful
    @aleiterful 2 года назад +8

    “It was September of 94, the cocaine was flowing and Puertorican Nelson was on my mind”

  • @funkandstein9849
    @funkandstein9849 4 года назад +4

    Smooth operator. Uncle Joey blastin ass and taking scores! Tha best!

  • @demetrekstewart2191
    @demetrekstewart2191 3 года назад +4

    I could listen to him all day

  • @lyndrel03
    @lyndrel03 4 года назад +4

    Icould listen to this man tell stories all day lol Tremendous story teller. Greatest story teller of our time!

  • @cindylast1901
    @cindylast1901 2 года назад +4

    "i wanna return this"
    "you just bought it..."
    "i dont need it."

  • @adamwalters5829
    @adamwalters5829 4 года назад +3

    I been there dawg, like exactly, and locked up and now recovered and work for everything I own. Work too much. Stay up. Love to watch/listen to the podcast.

  • @upbeatjohndoe8044
    @upbeatjohndoe8044 Год назад +2

    That's so crazy. I used to live in Longmont and I kept waiting for him to bring it up hahaha finally.

  • @jamielockerbie9830
    @jamielockerbie9830 4 года назад +33

    Tremendous

  • @johnnymn4monic726
    @johnnymn4monic726 2 года назад +2

    Plan A - picking up receipts at Kmart
    Plan B - Rob this guy
    😆 🤣

  • @XMR_WEST
    @XMR_WEST 4 года назад +18

    I still do half this shit!! Thank for the great stories Joey!!

    • @VintageFlowers
      @VintageFlowers 4 года назад +2

      With cameras everywhere?

    • @fantomex4249
      @fantomex4249 4 года назад

      @@VintageFlowers just make sure it's busy. When I was on the junk we'd do this alot at Walmart and Walgreens. Even Kroger sometimes. Pants are a good score. Oops wrong size. No receipt? You get a gift card. Go to the pawn shop and get 60% of the gift card in cash.or trade the card for dope

    • @243wayne1
      @243wayne1 2 года назад

      @@fantomex4249 = Loser

  • @chocktaebolanca757
    @chocktaebolanca757 4 года назад +2

    “RadioShack? I put them outta business” LMAOOOO

  • @LtDansLegs69
    @LtDansLegs69 4 года назад +57

    My friends mom was an alcoholic and her son used to steal steaks and food from wal mart so id go in and actually buy something she would go to the wine section and slam back 2 bottles of wine walking around the store filling a cart with shit and and just leave it and walk out. She never got caught, lady was crazy she'd slam 2 bottles of wine in like 20 minutes and be shit faced

    • @dawicked2k8
      @dawicked2k8 4 года назад +12

      Lmao that shit sounds savage 🤣
      She was about that alcoholic life

    • @CantWeedThis
      @CantWeedThis 4 года назад +10

      The good ol days. You be lucky to pull that one time even during Xmas rush.... Joey ruined it lol

    • @teokishd
      @teokishd 4 года назад +12

      believable story, used to be able to get away with all kinds of shit in the 90s/early 2000s..
      Now adays walmart has more asset protection employees than cashiers.

    • @phatshroom6662
      @phatshroom6662 4 года назад +1

      Teokis I always drink and eat shit off the shelves without paying

    • @amirmordechai1806
      @amirmordechai1806 4 года назад

      That’s my kind of girl

  • @jinzo3159
    @jinzo3159 2 года назад +5

    Give sum to Lee had me weak bro💀💀💀

  • @aroundtheweb_
    @aroundtheweb_ 4 года назад +64

    you ever stuffed pennies into a dime roll and cashed em in... its tremendous. unless they needed dimes 😆

    • @CantWeedThis
      @CantWeedThis 4 года назад +7

      Pennies wouldn't fit 😒 oh I'm that guy

    • @aroundtheweb_
      @aroundtheweb_ 4 года назад +7

      @@CantWeedThis ok u obviously never tried they definitely fit haha go get some.

    • @iniguezrobert
      @iniguezrobert 4 года назад +4

      Ur a bum

    • @aroundtheweb_
      @aroundtheweb_ 4 года назад

      @@iniguezrobert im not actually

    • @mjnelligan7288
      @mjnelligan7288 4 года назад +8

      Washers inside of a roll of toonies lol

  • @chrismorton998
    @chrismorton998 4 года назад +3

    oldie but a goodie

  • @ronnelmonroe8599
    @ronnelmonroe8599 4 года назад +15

    uncle Joey got a vacuum pump now that a professional

  • @dehvun7
    @dehvun7 6 месяцев назад

    Joey aint just loafing up carts and walking out hes thinking through the lawnmower one was badass😂

  • @mikesmith2718
    @mikesmith2718 4 года назад +2

    Uncle joey thanks for the laughs today I needed em. Love the stories

  • @danielward6624
    @danielward6624 4 года назад +1

    God I love this guy. Uncle Joey is the shit.

  • @Jimmy2time
    @Jimmy2time 4 месяца назад

    4:00 “ I don’t need it “ 😂😂

  • @bo_libido_buckets4429
    @bo_libido_buckets4429 3 года назад +3

    Imagine having to hotbox Uncle Joeys coughs and farts while trying not to throw up

  • @justxaine.3544
    @justxaine.3544 8 месяцев назад

    9:39 "ooh tremendous I love it " 😂😂😂

  • @nos4me
    @nos4me 3 года назад +1

    9:40 ooh tremendous I love it

  • @frankiewalnuts
    @frankiewalnuts 4 года назад +39

    When I was a gambling addict this is how I made my money

    • @arsek503
      @arsek503 4 года назад +6

      Double or nothin'

    • @Mikefame3
      @Mikefame3 4 года назад +1

      @@MD-wd5dj u going to the wrong casinos

  • @CaptainEO
    @CaptainEO 4 года назад +5

    9:39 💨 Tremendous

  • @abelucious
    @abelucious 4 года назад +27

    Joey falling on hard times , why didn't he think of doing voice over for the cookie monster ?

  • @aroundtheweb_
    @aroundtheweb_ 4 года назад +10

    coffee and church!

  • @Barbarian1244
    @Barbarian1244 3 года назад +4

    9:39 your welcome

    • @Sneak248
      @Sneak248 5 месяцев назад

      Tremendous

  • @bobbyspectre
    @bobbyspectre 4 года назад +3

    God bless uncle Joey. I got another dirtbag hustle to share. No longer applicable but 15-20 years ago the get’n was good. Basically what you do is get some hardback cover books wherever you can, dollar tree, goodwill, etc. take them to barnes and noble, return them for store credit. They give you the price that is printed on the upc(this was a time before everything was logged on a pc so they only could go by what was printed) average hardback was like 24.99 back then. Take 3 books for a return walk out with $85 in store credit. Use that store credit to buy cd’s or DVD’s take them to the pawn shop and get cash money,. Do that 3 times a day 5 days a week and you were making more dinero than your loser buddies at Burger King slaving 40 hours a week.

  • @validatemyexistence4602
    @validatemyexistence4602 4 года назад +8

    A bunch of friends of mine did that scam without telling me they were about it. This was 2011. We got the money, about 350$ worth. But before we could make our getaway a cop busted my one friend and he ended up doing a year.

  • @NewVegasCarrier
    @NewVegasCarrier 2 года назад +4

    If you're not thinking like a criminal, start. Everyone at Capitol Hill is.

  • @82RN
    @82RN 4 года назад

    GOD BLESS UNCLE JOEY DIAZ 🙏🏻

  • @hyenanerdwallet4720
    @hyenanerdwallet4720 4 года назад +28

    I smelled that fart

  • @jakelorenz1830
    @jakelorenz1830 4 года назад +2

    😂😂Damn as a manager at Big Lots this happens all the time!

  • @santiago3391
    @santiago3391 2 года назад +3

    9:39 Tremendous

  • @jarmoulcorbin660
    @jarmoulcorbin660 4 года назад +4

    Uncle Joey. I got you beat with radio shack. I used to work there and we all had keys to the cellphone cage. And let's just say. When inventory was done. Everybody got fired.

  • @blunterwun
    @blunterwun 3 года назад +1

    RADIOSHACK?! I PUT DEM OUTTA BUSINESS.

  • @flamboyant480
    @flamboyant480 4 года назад +4

    Hilarious. Thats some gangsta shit

  • @montanabaker1713
    @montanabaker1713 19 дней назад +1

    Just think of this guy next time you're screwed over by a return policy

  • @jameswarner6899
    @jameswarner6899 11 месяцев назад +1

    My wife saves every receipt

  • @AyalaVision91
    @AyalaVision91 Год назад

    I'm the reason Ames is forever gone and forgotten about 😂

  • @ctcs9162
    @ctcs9162 4 года назад +6

    My Uncle Joey / back to the wall story of life: Like Joey, Rent is due ($1200) Sept. 1, It's Friday, August 29, whatever, mid or late 2000's. After a wild weekend before in ACity and just being bad with money at that age, I'm tapped. Zero. No roommate, it's all on me. I worked a white collar job 9-5 that paid dogshit and I delivered pizzas part time on weekends because of said shit 9-5 job so I can live a little nicer than most. I'm taking every order I can get, this was a large coastal town in the US with tons of vacationers that order the fuck out of pizza on weekends. Make $8 an hour plus tips. Figured out a way to call in phony orders knowing I would get them, the online order thing had just started and I had that motherfucka beat too by ordering from computers in hotel lobbies as I was making legit deliveries there; stockpile them in my trunk after taking back to store/managers toss them in the trash, I had bought my own warmers so instead of dumpstering them as told, I kept them, since the trunk of my car was closer to the door than the dumpster. Next run, never failed, here comes mom and dad off the beach worn out with kids. I have my work uniform on, stop my car and say "Hey, I just had an order cancel out, I'm just going to trash them, wanna buy 'X" amount of pizzas/hoagies/wings for "X?" I was told no maybe 4 times all weekend. Adding my tips in, I cracked out $400 the first night, $550 on Sat. and another $400 on Sun. Working 4-10. Tips included. That Monday, I called in to 9-5 shit job and quit knowing I could pay my bills with this gig and only do scam here and there. It worked like a charm for another 6 months then they made me manager but I didn't manage on weekends, that was the deal. Another great white collar gig came along, grabbed it, I"m still doing it to this day, 6 figs a year. Cracked another $500 Labor Day evening, and I spent that Tuesday night with a neighbor/waitress and a coupla numba's and then some with the rest of the take and cleaned her monkey for her. Put a spit shine on that clam. I know high school classmates who ran that Kmart scam for years too, and the Florence Mall, until one got nabbed. Detective (store dick) in police report said it was the best scam he'd seen in his career. I never was a flat out thief like that, I never had the balls. I'll do the trickster shit.

    • @MaGiCMushroomClouds
      @MaGiCMushroomClouds 4 года назад +3

      I worked a white collar job 9-5 that paid pizzas and I delivered dogshit part time on weekends

    • @VintageFlowers
      @VintageFlowers 4 года назад

      Didn't fully understand. So you just didn't pay for the fake orders you created?

    • @ctcs9162
      @ctcs9162 4 года назад +1

      @@VintageFlowers Hell no. I'd take them out to deliver, knowing they were BS, brought them back, were deleted from the register and I sold them later. It was a way to keep a supply of hot pies in my truck for some luck bastard.

    • @bucknasty69
      @bucknasty69 9 месяцев назад

      I used to hit that same lick when I delivered pizzas back in the day as well. Ended up getting busted by my manager, but he let me keep doing it as long as I cut him in on the action haha

  • @nolanforcier1796
    @nolanforcier1796 4 года назад +1

    Totally used to do that when I was an addict!!! Too funny!!!

  • @rubensoares3943
    @rubensoares3943 3 года назад +2

    Amazing he farts and he says tremendous 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂

  • @michellewolfel3975
    @michellewolfel3975 4 года назад +3

    Absolutely hilarious

  • @XAX-v
    @XAX-v 4 года назад +3

    Lee slacking on that camera work

  • @onewillow8511
    @onewillow8511 4 года назад +2

    "It is better to be born without a dick than without a luck" - I see Joey's picture whenever I recall this old saying 😂😇👊

  • @crisgarcia4400
    @crisgarcia4400 4 года назад

    He hit me with the flavor changer through the fucking screen man.

  • @IAmStayingAnonymous
    @IAmStayingAnonymous 4 года назад +3

    Here you guys go. I don't approve of this anymore because I'm no longer a junkie, but walk into a rite aid or CVS, or even gas station. Pick up two gift cards that are prepaid amounts like 25, 50, or 100. Not the kind you pick the amount. Put one in a hoody pocket, once the cashier scans the other one because you "want to buy it" it automatically activates. Then ask the cashier be like "OH and I need a pack of smokes, and once they turn around quickly swap the one on the counter and the one in your pocket then once they ring up the cigarettes just act like you forgot your cash and leave. Lol.

  • @Greyalien587
    @Greyalien587 3 года назад +2

    We used to go to shoes stores as kids. Ask the guy working for a “‘pair of these size 42”..the guy returns with the box. You put them on and they don’t fit good so you return the box and walk out. Little does the poor fella know that the shoes in the box are the old worn shoes. And we just walk out of the store with fresh pair of nikes!
    Takes balls when looking back at it

  • @hdsjakaoaosixhhdsisisiuf2680
    @hdsjakaoaosixhhdsisisiuf2680 3 года назад +1

    “Give some kosher to Lee.”

  • @prod.surgical5284
    @prod.surgical5284 Месяц назад

    Poor Lee 😭😂

  • @dcowboys6213
    @dcowboys6213 4 года назад +5

    You can still do that at home depot lmao

  • @johnlennon4869
    @johnlennon4869 4 года назад +1

    Hahaha Joey is Hilarious, what a riot 🤣

  • @jeremykinsey7877
    @jeremykinsey7877 Год назад +1

    Joey Diaz, we stole cable filers as a kid in 90's. Sell them to guy at army surplus store 20$ each. Oklahoma ghetto kids

  • @sweetconman
    @sweetconman 3 года назад +1

    It always amazes me how some people remember what year they did their things specially when it has been over two decades

  • @bigbrainalertpodcast9902
    @bigbrainalertpodcast9902 4 года назад +2

    That’s wild 😂

  • @FreneticZetetic
    @FreneticZetetic Год назад

    "I just walked out with the whole fuckin' apparatus."

  • @abumiah3324
    @abumiah3324 3 года назад

    Watching this August 31st 2021

  • @mrshhh7841
    @mrshhh7841 4 года назад +2

    when I worked at Kmart as a loss prevention person I would tell people to ''put it back'.

  • @jrmorrison9244
    @jrmorrison9244 3 года назад

    I love you joe

  • @papidan87
    @papidan87 4 года назад

    I jus love uncle joey mehn😂🤣

  • @goodstuff8257
    @goodstuff8257 4 года назад

    I hate thieves but I gotta admit these stories are entertaining

  • @mattricci5158
    @mattricci5158 4 года назад

    I wanna see uncle Joey, josh wolf, and dope as yola on a podcast!

  • @Hazy216
    @Hazy216 Год назад

    9:39 😂😂😂😂😂

  • @dreamcatcher6164
    @dreamcatcher6164 4 года назад +4

    I have to try that method..

    • @gelatobaker9679
      @gelatobaker9679 4 года назад +1

      Which one?? The one at 6:24??😅😅😅

    • @dreamcatcher6164
      @dreamcatcher6164 4 года назад +2

      @@gelatobaker9679 ha ha ha ha...no not that one. 🤢 the returning merchandise i never purchased..🤣

  • @luisestrada2500
    @luisestrada2500 2 года назад +1

    Sounded like he shat himself hahahhaha

  • @PROUDTOBEANAMERICAN55
    @PROUDTOBEANAMERICAN55 4 года назад

    What does this guy mean you can't do that anymore? Yes the hell you can.. lmao

  • @Gabriel-fr3sd
    @Gabriel-fr3sd 3 года назад +1

    I don’t get it, what is a receipt good for if you don’t have the goods?

    • @tommyfu9271
      @tommyfu9271 Год назад +1

      He'd get the good from the shelves.

  • @brtecson
    @brtecson 2 месяца назад

    I like to think I bankrupted Kmart too. During winter I wear a puffy first down trenchcoat and "steal til i drop". I've stolen fishing poles, all kinds of tackle, liquid plumr, dickies clothing, school supplies, everything. I'd pay for the soda tho, 12pk cans for 1.49 on sale to not raise suspicion. I've never thought of reciept chasing though lol.

  • @dylancromwell7015
    @dylancromwell7015 4 года назад +1

    Lol I covered my nose when Joey farted for some reason

  • @FAIRVIEWORTIZ
    @FAIRVIEWORTIZ 4 года назад +1

    TREMENDUS

  • @ryanmaragh8209
    @ryanmaragh8209 3 года назад

    LMFAOOOOO LEGEND

  • @Tanko105
    @Tanko105 4 года назад

    And we scared to buy puffs without being carded😂

  • @rubensoares3943
    @rubensoares3943 3 года назад

    He farts In the show. 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 Amazing!!!

  • @urbansolis
    @urbansolis Год назад

    "You know, I don't need the cash"😂😂😂😂😂 what episode did he tell that story? I know its one of his early ones. Just started listening to the church I started episode one I'm on episode 167

  • @GGGth1
    @GGGth1 3 года назад

    *joey farts* - "that's tremendous, give some to Lee. Give some kosher to Lee"
    *Waves it over and turns on the fan*

  • @trevdogbunkers1048
    @trevdogbunkers1048 4 года назад

    And I thought my job was bad lemme just count dis bread lmmmao

  • @fourtyfivefudd
    @fourtyfivefudd 2 года назад

    I solely blame Joey for Radio Shacks downfall. I miss that place

  • @NZX222
    @NZX222 3 года назад +2

    I hope my receipts are helping someone

  • @landocal0
    @landocal0 4 года назад

    Random thought but has he ever done a show where he discusses where the nickname Coco comes from.

  • @Jake-ne4hd
    @Jake-ne4hd 4 года назад

    Joey Diaz is the reason there are anti-shoplifting tags in every store.

  • @spliffsenseiroejogan9380
    @spliffsenseiroejogan9380 4 года назад +1

    He stopped when I was born June 95 lol

  • @GetRich23
    @GetRich23 4 года назад +1

    It sounded like uncle Joey shit himself.