✨ Plan your most intentional & successful year with the 2024 Artist of Life Workbook, a powerful guided journal for achieving your dream life → lavendaire.com/workbook
Assalamualaikum sister recite last two verses of surah bakarah every night before sleep It's in Quran you can read it's English translation I'm telling you it will heal you انشاللہ May Allah guide and protect all of us Ameen ❤
I feel so bad that we live in a world where we are so focused on productivity that just not feeling like doing things can make us feel unworthy. I am speaking from my personal experience.
This is me rn I moved to a new school and I have a lot to catch up on but I’m so exhausted but yet I feel sm pressure to do well because I missed a lot of work💔
I cried 5 seconds into the video. Been struggling, feeling like I’ve been underperforming at work. You made me feel like there’s people who understand me.
To the person reading this: You did a great job today even if all you did was get out of bed. Im so proud of you. Especially for giving your body a break.
i feel so useless. my motivation is gone, and i do not see a future for myself. negativity and laziness has consumed me after beginning college. i cannot express how much i want to study, focus and complete my assignments, yet i cannot do it. thank you for the advice, i hope i will get out of this slump soon💗
This made me so emotional...i didn't realise that the reason I'm struggling to keep routines is because of the expectations I have of myself and how far away I feel am from what I think my life should be like. I don't appreciate the progress, I'm always thinking I need to improve.
excalty that is what I tell myself I just turn 36 and I feel soo unmotivated to do much of anything. I hate that feeling I don't really have any friends or a gf 😕. I don't talk to anyone really. and if anyone calls me it's usually just to use me. I use to be full of energy and motivation when I was younger going to school,working, working out at the gym I had quite a few friends. now all I do is go to work and come home and repeat the cycle. I do have a 9 yr old boy.
When she started crying at "I literally want to do nothing" I immediately cried, too. It felt so surreal that I'm seeing someone else experience the burden I'm feeling. My family has always had a strong personality and I've always been a very emotional person. I placed such high expectations on myself because they did the grind and they turned out fine. What's wrong with me? I did so much yet I'm getting nowhere. I didn't realize that everything just piled up and I couldn't take it anymore. Just like Lavendaire said we need to accept our feminine side too. We all need rest to be more in tune with ourselves.
I was always hard on myself too. My family also, not that much but enough that I can tell, are the grinding type. But this quarintine (that I'm still voluntarily under) is taking such a toll, I couldn't handle stressful situations, so I ended up quitting two classes. Now I'll be in university another year. I was so angry and dissapointed I hadn't put up with them, but the moment I didn't attend to that class, I felt so freed and relieved. Whatever you stopped doing to rest, I congratulate you. Just as it is important to find strenght to continue, is even more important to have the strengh to stop.
She’s the only person , that cares because other than her video all the videos we’re calling me lazy and unmotivated and I really feel understood when she said “burnt out “ ,I’m in my final year of Med school and I feel exactly that , thank you ❤️
I’ve been afraid of taking breaks because I feel like I’m wasting time but I can’t do anything because I’m so tired mentally and physically. I will take your advice. Thank you so much
I started crying while watching this. What sucks is that I live with my Asian parents. I can’t even cry out all my feelings because they always end up making me feel bad even though they have good intentions with trying to help me. I wish I lived alone so that I could heal alone, but I could never do that when I’m stuck with my parents. It’s an endless cycle for me: if I don’t get the space I need to heal, I won’t have a clear mind to be my best self. I can’t perform as well as I need to in order to get a job, and that means I can’t move out.
I can understand through what you are going and how you feeling because I'm going from the same situation. Just give it a some time,everything is gonna be okay 👍
I can totally understand and relate to you. You can try something which is literally helpful for me: 1. Do self love (positive) by looking at yourself in the mirror 2. If you want to cry, go to the bathroom and cry 3. In order to clear your mind you can do journaling (pen down your feelings) 4. Either you try to wake up one hour before your parents or sleep after your parents have fallen asleep and at this time you can do meditation (basically focus on your breath) or you can do some yoga or positive self talk 5. Read one motivational quote everyday and keep recalling that motivational quote throughout the day Just chill, everything gonna be okay. You can do whatever you wish if you have clear mind and goal 👍🏻
I feel the lack of work is what's causing alot of the terrible feelings you have. After being jobless for a while I truly understand just how important it is to have something that'll get you out of bed in the morning or out into the world. Do your best and even if the job isn't much, give it a go and no joke, try to stay busy
1.let yourself rest 2.give yourself love 3.shift your focus 4.stop consuming contents that makes you feel worse 5.accept yourself as you are 6.go into nature 7.understand that life happens in cycles 8.start with baby steps 😇💗 9.Find gratitude 💕💫
I'm grateful for this video which describes exactly how I feel today. I plan to do exactly 2 things to help myself feel better. Exercise, ( I will walk outside, which stimulates endorphins and gives me some natural Vitamin D ) and wash my hair. Self care is very important. I also plan to eat little and lightly. Not overburdening an already stressed body is another way to feel better. Thanks so much for the encouragement. My oldest cat, ( I bred him and saw him come into the world,) he was 15, died about 10 days ago. Plus I'm dealing with a possible torn Rotator Cuff injury so I'm not feeling stellar. I was encouraged by this though. Thank you!❤
What's even more frustrating is the feeling of being guilty of not being productive, and thinking that you could have done more or given yourself a better life if you have better time management skills. And even that itself causes demotivation, and the fact that it causes ypu to be lazy makes you even more depressed. Lol idk if that makes sense
It makes sense , In fact this is the reason why most people cant take rest/give themselves more time to relax . The same thing kinda happened to me but in different way btw have a good day :)
It just really hurts cause i was just about to find myself but i suddenly lost it again and i hope i and anyone suffering will make it and restore what they lost during the hardtimes each one of us faced...
Same. I felt things were slowly improving, and I was so hopeful for this year, but then in early February my boyfriend broke up with me. It set me back so much, and I just feel anxious and depressed everyday.... I feel so lost and hopeless. 😔 We were planning to move in together in a few months, spoke about getting engaged, and planned to start trying for a family in the next year. Now I feel like everything is gone. 💔 I'm in my late 30s so it's hard to start again... I'm just heartbroken, and I feel like I'm frozen in this state where simple tasks seem so difficult, and it's hard to stay focused at work. I'm so grateful I found this video... I feel a little less alone. I hope we're all able to get back to where we were and on a healthier, happier path. 🩷
@@oiqueleria omg i totally understand you. I started my masters degree during this pandemic, haven’t even met the people I’m studying with because Zoom lol and my exam weeks start next week and I can’t even make myself get up from bed 😞 and teachers don’t even care that it’s stressful to be studying online for a year already without any interaction
i feel so lazy. i have like 10 unfinished assignments and some are from last year ): i feel like everyone else in my class manages just fine, and im so ashamed of myself.. i really want to get good grades to get my dream job, but i constantly lose faith in myself.. it sucks
@@elsie4802 dang, that does suck :( i hope you'll be able to relax and recharge sometime really soon so you can enjoy your classes and get everything done. and don't worry or beat yourself up, the people in your class aren't managing everything perfectly all the time. celebrate your small victories and baby steps, and don't be ashamed of needing time to heal :)
Here I am watching this video again after a year, so much has changed for me now, I'm much more stable and happy now, and I'm so glad I kept going. Stay strong & hang in there y’all💗
This really saved me today and I believe will save me plenty more times in the future. Thanks Aileen! I do fall for the trap of blaming myself for 'not doing' when I am in this state, and that definitely makes me feel worse, as I end up tired AND angry at myself. You are a bright light and I am so grateful I found your channel 🙏🙏🙏
This is exactly how I felt since the beginning of the pandemic. I recently deleted my Instagram, TikTok, and Facebook. My mental health feels like it has gotten a little bit better. I want to be at peace within myself. I want to experience more things in life instead of scrolling away on social media. We all deserve happiness.
Man this made me cry because I’m nervous, scared, excited too but more fear energy than usual for my future. I’m a 23 year old entrepreneur that feels sooooo drained ever since last December. I feel like I’m not excited as I used to be, I feel like I’m in derealization mode like I’m not really living i have a view of just autopilot and feeling that I’m not in control/ it’s so weird but I just wanna ask for this RUclips community to pray for me. I may post videos like I’m fine but no deep down I’m trying to heal , I love yall always especially those that go through this 🖤 thank you for this video
I have had burnout lately with life and working in mental health care. As you may pour yourself into others, you have to pour into yourself too. I love how you said you have to practice unconditional love and to practice forgiveness. We all need to practice self love.
i really needed to hear this rn… i didn’t realize how badly the expectations i had for myself were burdening me and i felt terrible for feeling burnt out. thank you !!
You have no idea how much this helped me. I thought I was crazy and my mental health was spinning out of control. I thought I was broken and I could never reach my goals. Now I have a new perspective and rather than pushing myself past my limits I’m going to focus on taking things one step at a time. Thank you ❤️
I've been feeling unmotivated for a long time and honestly at first i thought that people just push forward and accomplish things even when they're down, but you made me realize that you have to take care of yourself, relax and try to heal inorder to move forward which we don't pay attention when feeling low. Thank you for making this video! It helps a lot and i also enjoyed it and liked the filming of nature. I wish you well ❤
1. let yourself rest 2. give yourself love 3. shift your focus 4. stop consuming content that makes you feel worse 5. understand that life happens in cycles 6. start with baby steps 7. find gratitude
It was a very good video. The biggest thing that changed my life though was cleaning up my health...eating better (fruits and veggies give natural energy) and taking supplements for vitamin deficiency (good to get this checked out by a doctor). Also, going to the doctor and taking care of health issues....Some people have ongoing infections, bacterial or fungal, and don't even realize it. I had one for years after living in a moldy house. Mold can make you very sick! I had to change my environment. A photocatalytic air purifier was very helpful. Also, decluttering my house (clutter can zap your brain energy). Drink plenty of good water and breath in clean air! Deep breathing is wonderful. Also, and here's a big one--don't ignore your spiritual life. God can and wants to help you...He loves you and answers prayer. :) Reading a devotional and prayer in the morning changes my whole day and gives me positive energy! Peace to everyone.
I've been crying, feel useless, and unmotivated because of unemployment. Every day, just stare at my inbox, waiting for a reply, but nothing but glad I found your channel. It eases me a bit about life. Thank you. I need this.
Hey, 💖 try to get a coach, someone that will help you to improve on some skills. Also is a good idea to volunteer. You are not alone...don't be to hard on yourself.
Omg. The situation you go through same like me. My age turn 26 this year. But still i did not have a stable job. I feel like im useless to my family. And it distracted me all the time stuck in my brain. I was depressed thinking of that
You will get a more stable job.. hang on there buddy, be patient.. don't lose hope.. just fix ur dream position and run towards it.. am also unemployed i did nothing for past 3 years bcz of breakup. Now i set something and i working for that.. so i know ur feelings.. just wait and hope.. keep working ❤
Same. Same. 😔 ....and I live alone too. I feel really lonely, especially on the weekends. How are you doing today, madj? I'm about 9 weeks post-breakup.... And I feel so lost and broken, so anxious and depressed, unmotivated. 💔 I can't wait to feel better again. Hope you're healed at this point 🫶
I'm really grateful for your amazing RUclips channel. You helped me more than you could ever imagine. I wish you nothing but the very best thing in the world.
❤I just came up out of a 2 week slump. Single parent, people playing with my job 😮I called in 2 weeks straight and was just down, brain fog thicker than London fog. My kids helped me get back up and I accept I cannot control everything but all I can do is keep doing my part and take care of me and my kids. I’m in a better place now and we hung Christmas 🎄 decor last week and we are getting ready for Thanksgiving dinner this week and I have. 4 day weekend coming up! All the points u hit on are true and I did those things and now this video is in my feed! Thanks 😊
I went through one of the worst phases of my life in January and I just wanna say I'm glad to be here. Glad I'm doing better. Everything *will* be okay. If you're reading this, you'll get through this.
Yeah .. But I've been in this slump since lockdown... But I'm in such a better place than that time.. Everything she told in the video in absolutely trueee.. You go gurrrlll
I hate my job, I had applied for master's this year, but failed to get in, made a portfolio with the best of my ability...but it sucks! Everyone around me is moving forward! I'm just a lump in bed doing nothing & even if I want to...I'm unable to do anything. Like there's a never ending blank! I feel like I'm wasting my 20s away! :(
@@vedzyo6666 dude, at least you have a job, other people find it too hard to get a job. You don't need a master, you need CPA, CFA, and other certifications. anyway, master is easy to get in, you're doing it wrong. they need your money anyway
@@MixSonaProductions Just because someone has a job doesn't mean their problems go away... Also, didn't really get your point about CPA, CFA, etc. I'm in the architecture field....so a master's is quite essential!
Thank you for making me realise that I don't have to be perfect all the time because whenever I am unable to finish a certain task I feel demotivated and unworthy but from now on I will give myself some time to heal and relax✨💙
I just had therapy, been crying for so long and I feel so extremely depressed and everything feels pointless... life feels pointless. and this is the first thing that popped up. thank you, Aileen.
The online classes and staying at home has been really getting to my mental health. I need socializing and going out, but most importantly traveling... Let’s all pray for this to end soon 😭💜
I started to cry straight away because this is exactly how I feel right now. I didn't know what to do about it either which just got me frustrated. Seeing this video gave me hope. Thank you so much! ❤
I feel like this rn 😭 i felt so exhausted for a while then finally i rest for days then i lost all motivation i have no more energy or positivity to do anything....
It is so natural for me to WANT to rest and allow my feelings to heal. But others are so pushy and tell me to get up and get outside and get some sun and be productive and it makes me feel so much worse.
I’m going through the exact same thing. I want to relax and take things slow, achieving my goals bit by bit but my parents keep telling me to stop being lazy and go outside. It’s all this pressure and expectation they have on me that’s effecting my mental health. They don’t realise that I’m trying my best and how difficult my situation is. I dislike society’s expectation on young people, how your suppose to be at this stage at this age etc. When everyone’s journey in life is different.
The problem with me is that I never do anything. I started homeschooling at the start of this year. I haven't done anything. Recently I have been in the house all the time and struggling to get work done. Literally exhausted from doing nothing. My anxiety has been through the roof this past week. Feeling like I'm failing everything. Scared for my future cos of how low my confidence is and how unmotivated I am. Hopefully I can pull myself together soon
I think that you are not doing anything because you are overwhelmed with all the things that you need to do, I recommend finding ways to motivate yourself to do really little things so you can build confidence again, focusing on how you feel and why you feel a certain way (ask yourself really specific questions so you can understand what your body is trying to tell you) and reassuring you that everything will fall into place no matter what. Of course I know that this might be difficult at first and that it's not going to completely change your life, but it's a way to start building a new routine slowly and learn things by yourself, you've got this
Your future you will really thank you for what you do now. Try not to fall into that long-term comfort for some discomfort. I’d say try to positively encourage yourself and trick your brain in to trying it for 10 mins so that you at least get started and of course the usual, take a break every now and then, take care of yourself, etc. All the best, you’ve got this ✊🏼
im in a similar situation and i can’t express how much this comment made me feel less alone; although i don’t have much advice but i do recommend setting small goals and working yourself up to the bigger things,, please be kind to yourself and take it easy
I haven't heard such wiser words when it gets too much Everything you said rings very true. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. I relate to all you are saying ❤
I am feeling very down at the moment, burnt out, and for a month now, I've been afraid of falling into a low state. I've battled with depression for a long time, and it's been over a month since I've felt much better, but the fear of feeling low again lingers. Watching this video brought me to tears, especially when the phrase "simply existing" was mentioned; it struck a chord with me. Perhaps I've found the answer to a question that has always plagued me: "What is the ultimate outcome of life and being alive?" The answer is simply existing, allowing myself to be who I am, and flowing with the tide of life. Thank you for reminding me of the beauty in our existence.
I literally spent all day doing nothing and just layed in my bed all day. I was feeling so guilty and blaming myself for being so lazy. Thanks for changing my perspective! I really needed this.
I've been running away from my research, delaying my study schedules, etc. last year of college (hopefully) has been very difficult, stressing, and putting myself in my lowest state. I know running away from it is bad and in the end I still have to face it. I tried to get on my laptop, opened the important file, but I had my phone in my hand scrolling through youtube. Thanks youtube for popping this video on among the search results. I can't lie I cried cause all the words were relatable and true, I need to heal before I get ready to face it again. Love, x Update: on May 31st, I gained my judicium and now expecting the graduation ceremony in 2 months🥰
me too 😭😭😭 now literally at the end of my degree and like ..... how do i do this 😭 tomorrow is my viva dy 😭😭😭😭😭 i am scared that i will fail and then having to repeat
Oh gosh, I was honestly expecting advice like "make a to do list", "eat healthy", "work out", .... but this is so much more insightful! Your advice in this video feels so relatable, comforting and actionable. This is so needed and hits the spot exactly. I feel so understood and I appreciate you for sharing this so much! Thank you!
Found this video right when I needed it. I’ve had depression for over 7 years and sometimes when I compare myself to others I forget that these people don’t go through what I’ve been through and that I have my own burdens that I often underestimate. Thank you for reminding me that sometimes it’s okay to not feel okay and do nothing to feel a little bit better.
I feel the same way for 3 years. I feel like I am stuck, I am constantly running away from every problem and I am feeling extremely unmotivated to do anything. I fight with fear of failing and my mind keeps telling me that I am not good enough. So when I tried to find new hobby (bc I don't have one), I instantly gave up, bc I didn't believe in myself...And the hardest part is that I really don't know what to do to feel and be better and how to change my life and my thinking...I feel trapped and helpless...
Since I graduated high school and got into uni, I became so unmotivated. I always have the feeling that I want to do nothing and whenever I want to study I can’t, I feel so empty with no purpose in life. I just don’t know what’s going on with me, I keep on thinking of dropping out but I know it’s not the right thing to do.
@@kreisti2726 I hope things get better for you and I as well as everyone who’s feeling the same way and don’t harm yourself, we all go through those times but we will get through it🤍
Yesterday I ended up walking on the streets in a sad and overwhelmed state, after finishing work. I skipped my sports class but didn’t want to go home either. So I walked. I ended up finding a beautiful trail with secret gardens alongside, and decided to visit my parents afterwards which they were so grateful for. Today everything feels different. It was raining all morning but I decided to visit the forest anyway. Half an hour ago the sun suddenly started shining brightly and I sat down to listen to your video. I followed your advice and opened my notebook, and the first thing that came into my mind was to write: ‘I feel blessed to be alive’. Thank you Lavendaire, you are making a lot of impact with your videos.
It's easier to grant yourself the need to ''do nothing" when you have a good balance of a work and social life. But if youre someone who regularly is unmotivated and almost daily does nothing, then "doing nothing" becomes torturous. Instead, you're in four walls of enclosed anxiety and rumination, but you just can't motivate yourself to get out of your room to do something about it.
I completely understand! I was thinking the same thing as I watched this video. As a young adult I was stuck for years but then I stumbled upon my purpose in life and everything changed. For 25 years I was so busy fulfilling that purpose that I didn't even have time to question if I felt like doing anything. Then I suffered a huge trauma and my life came to a halt. It's been 7 years since then and I haven't felt able to do the simplest things. Just taking a shower and shaving my legs seems like an insurmountable task! To make matters worse, my sister who is 3 years older is going through the same thing and we live together. I think I may have a fear that if and when I do get back into a productive life, I will be so busy and won't have the luxury of slowing down when I'm not feeling up to it. You can't just drop in and out of your responsibilities whenever you just don't feel like getting out of bed! That's probably why I stay in this state of paralysis. I'm afraid to do nothing and even more afraid to do something.....
@@cathyhowell1294 It's been four weeks since you wrote this. I sincerely hope you're feeling better. If you're not tho, read this. I get that the luxury of not doing anything isn't really there all the time. I know how hard the pressure can be. What I'm getting at is, since you're already feeling the paralysis and are unable to do anything... how about not pressuring yourself. I think the reason you're unable to get out of this is because you're adding to the pressure instead of lifting it, and you need to lift it. So stop feeling guilty that you're not doing anything. Start seeing this period of not doing stuff as a mechanical spring; once completely charged, it'll give you a huge boost towards the "productivity" you're looking for. I wish you all the best.
@@ashlee7831 wow well said, that’s exactly what’s going on. Allowing yourself to relax without the guilt helps you recharge to motivation; otherwise, you’re defeating the purpose of “doing nothing”.
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Anxiety has literally paralyzed me. Wake up to anxiety, struggle with it all day and just try to stay alive. I just dont know what to do anymore and feel like im gonna be like this forever and that is freaking terrifying.
*"Our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time."* I believe in you my friend, never give up...
This has hit me right in my core. I have been feeling so unmotivated, sad, lost with searching for a purpose to move on. It's hard to let go and rest without feeling guilt.
Thank you. I watched while doing self-care and it made it run smoothly and not feel like i have to do it but because I am loving it and i need not to be hard on myself. I have been hard on myself such that I even got feedback from people who are not close to me without even asking. I had a lot of expectations, and others' expectations that drained me and made me hate myself, ignore self-care and self-love. Slowing down has been the hardest thing for me but I learnt that this is what God wanted for me. To slow down and love who i am the way i am. Indeed God is Kind, He loves me and still cares about me. I love Him too🙏🏽 Thank you ☺️
When you said "if you don't know what your intuition is telling you so maybe you need a break before it tells you what to do next" resonated so much for me. I've been forcing answers out of myself instead of giving myself time and space to breathe. I will try to trust that in the peace, the answers will reveal themselves.
Having high expectations and not meeting them I can extremely relate, I'm a student and I had high expectations with my school grades and I never met them and now I'm so unmotivated, always discouraged and lazy to study, anyways I love what you doing and just keep on doing it ❤️
I needed this video so bad. I was sick for two weeks and now I’m fine but I feel sort of uncomfortable going outside. Before this I used to go out by myself all the time but now I’m scared to do anything on my own.
The point about STOP CONSUMING CONTENT THAT MAKES YOU FEEL WORSE is super key here imo, because oftentimes it is content we consume all the time or are even our favorite content creators. For me, when I'm feeling this period of lows, I have to stop watching content about productivity and hustling. The only thing I can really watch without feeling any pressure is ASMR. Being in tech, I would constantly watch tech videos and I realized that I felt like I was being so useless and unproductive compared to these RUclipsrs. Just a reminder that sometimes your fav channels may be bad for you in a state of low. I would try out ASMR, slow living, and peaceful living type videos. But just be careful not to compare your life with others.
You're right. I didn't realize how my vision board/motivation board is causing me all this anxiety. Looking at it constantly only reminds me what a piece of trash I am that's rotting away. Thank you.
So true! I haven't notice but yes, even the most inspiring videos and even the content that isn't about productivity as such is causing me some kind of FOMO. Thoughts like "I shouln't just consume, but make content too" etc. are constantly with me while browsing my bubble on Social Media. Like a never ending battle of myself against time while the motivation to get started is getting lower and lower due to this pressure. I really enjoyed this video and reading your comment. It made me realize some really important things. Thank you
this was literally me all of this week. I did nothing and just read a lot, went on walks and took many showers. I think I'm reaching burn out and I definitely needed this week to relax and stop go-go-going
I’m actually reading Burnout - The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle by Emily Nagoski, PhD & Amelia Nagoski, DMA. I got it at Target for 15% off. So far I’m really liking it & taking a TON of notes!
Yes i can, i will I don't want to have any more expectations on myself and make myself completely surrender in work, but i will surrender myself away from all stress
2 days ago i felt so motivated and productive , I studied so well and was so excited all the time. I know i can do anything if I’m comfortable, confident and happy. But the point is I can never be like that. Yesterday i could be happy but today I feel depressed and there’s a hollow in my heart. I don’t even know why.. i’m scared and feel like everything is unfair. I hate the fact that I can’t be satisfied with everything im having right now. And im envious of ppl who feel content, know and accept who they are. I can’t be like that...
Jesus can fill that in your heart. I've felt that way before, and God is the only way I know that can make me feel content for longer than a few moments.
@@annmariestephens4285 that does not work for many people. What works for you does not work for someone else. Alot of religion is built on NOT accepting yourself. Relgious women in particular seem very unhappy, but try to hide it.
@@ayshafareed4935 There's a difference between man-made religion and spirituality, a relationship with Jesus. :) A lot of religious people don't even have a relationship with God, because they're too focused on their own works. When He was on earth, Jesus even spoke out against the religious spirit...His concern is a relationship with us, not praying to statues or counting prayer beads. There's a saying: "Religion is belief in someone else's experiences. Spirituality is having your own experience." No one else can have your spiritual experience with God but you. :) And if you don't engage with Him, how will you even know what that relationship is like? You'll know what you've been missing. I sure did. God bless you! :)
I feel so much better now...I've been being very hard on myself because of my parents' expectations for years...but now, I want to be gentle with myself because I deserve it ...tysm ❤
whats crazy is that i told myself this and then gaslighted myself into thinking this was invalid. This is such a great confirmation for me cause i felt like not doing anything was just lazy and that i couldve been doing something this whole time. love this video ❤️
when you're on a 9 to 5 job.. I just get so burned out after work and don't want to do anything. even during weekends I'm just so drained that I wasn't able to achieve anything I don't even pursue my hobbies anymore.
Yeah it's difficult. I have an 8-5 as well and an evening job 6-12 as well including weekends (6-8 he shifts). Idk how to slow down now since my time is taken to work and still trying to perfect meal planning to save money and eat. I hope things get easier.
Yes, I completely relate. It’s tough because I know I could do so much more than what I am doing. I self sabotage because I beat myself up so bad for procrastinating, to the point where I do absolutely nothing rather than try and potentially failing. I failed my classes because of this mindset; I went from a straight A student to not even going to class for months. I can’t handle all this stress. I know it’s all in my mind and I know none of what I’m telling myself is true, which makes it even more frustrating. I’m the poster child of a gifted overachiever child, who let all the praise manifest into strict expectations of myself. SIGH
Omgosh... why is this me? I struggle so much, I feel like every other week is a dramatic change especially the weekend. It'll either be I'm doing all my hobbies I like but couldn't go outside because that's a lot and the commute to work is too much so I just don't wanna travel. I tried to get ppl to remind me or dare me once but they just forgot and I didn't wanna go in detail about how much I needed external motivation so I said it's okay but it wasn't. Then other weekends I try and maybe I'll get part of the morning good but then I feel like I go very hard on escapism. Then I get sad because I feel so disconnected from everyone and idk where my life is going because it feels like it's one step forward and two steps back *sigh* But like Taylor said, "at least I'm trying"...
The fact that she watched herself crying while editing the video and yet didn't cut it down was so empowering You're so strong It takes so much strength to do that I would never imagine myself doing it
i don't get why society wants us to hide negative emotions. i feel guilty whenever I'm expressing complaint about my feeling unwell in that moment, overwhelmed or unmotivated etc, cause i feel judged to be someone who complains or lazy or else, I don't get why we aren't allowed to feel this way and express it when it's in our human nature. i hate this.
Thanks for being so vulnerable. As a plumber I'm really trying to take better care of myself. My physical therapist recommends changing jobs due to rotator cuff and back issues. It's hard to be grateful when you're always in pain but there's always hope.
I'm crying watching this because I feel like such a failure and have lost control of my career, mental health, relationships, and all I want to do is sleep most times. I have a love/hate relationship with myself
@@hurtsoul7398 I love how even as you go through all of these things, you still ask how others are doing! You are so brave and so strong and always remember: with challenge comes change! So with all the challenges, change will happen, and it ALWAYS leads to something better! Life will always put you through tough times in order to being you to even better times than before! You all got this!❤❤❤
Your intro made me cry, because i can relate to it. I feel like im useless. your voice and your advice and sharing your experience to help people in need to those who feel the same way are so relaxing and make me feel good. but at the end of the day, that worst feeling comes back again.
I think a lot of the time we need to distract ourselves from our emotions and being caught up in them. I am a very emotional person and sometimes they consume me. I am going to try and learn mindfulness and DBT. best wishes, you are not alone! 💜
if you are feeling bad every time you are not distracted from it, you might need a therapist. Feeling useless all the time is a signal that something is wrong and If it's lasting for a while, it means you need some help from a professional, take it seriously !
Their is no need to cry if your still healthy enough to go outside... Feelings come and go and even if it takes days or weeks, you healthy guys are lucky...
✨ Plan your most intentional & successful year with the 2024 Artist of Life Workbook, a powerful guided journal for achieving your dream life → lavendaire.com/workbook
Excellent video with many healthy pieces of advice. Thanks a lot.
Assalamualaikum sister recite last two verses of surah bakarah every night before sleep
It's in Quran you can read it's English translation
I'm telling you it will heal you
انشاللہ
May Allah guide and protect all of us Ameen ❤
This video saves me everytime
Hello my loviee 🌄😉😊
The crying while saying I literally want to do nothing. Is the realest thing I’ve ever seen on RUclips.
exactly
Same😧
Yep! “ mama said there will be days like this...”
Sometimes you just gotta let it out
Ikkk
I feel so bad that we live in a world where we are so focused on productivity that just not feeling like doing things can make us feel unworthy. I am speaking from my personal experience.
well said
you're very right :(.
This is me rn I moved to a new school and I have a lot to catch up on but I’m so exhausted but yet I feel sm pressure to do well because I missed a lot of work💔
Capitalism. Unfortunately.
capitalism. but more people are waking up to it
I cried 5 seconds into the video. Been struggling, feeling like I’ve been underperforming at work. You made me feel like there’s people who understand me.
Gracious we must be sisters in some way I cried a few seconds in too ❤❤
You really shouldn't get too emotional about what she says. The purpose of these videos is to earn from the Betterhelp sponsor
Same
Me too
Hi just wanna check in on you - how you doing now?
It’s been 3 years but I still come back to this video. Just allowing myself to rest.
To the person reading this:
You did a great job today even if all you did was get out of bed. Im so proud of you. Especially for giving your body a break.
🙌🏾
Thank you so much
Amen sistah 🌸 some days are tough ☀️
Thank you I needed that
thank you
“You can’t go back and change the beginning, but you can start where you are and change the ending.”
*―C. S. Lewis*
Exactly buddy !
Okie man, i see ur comments on majorly every vid of lavendaire and i wanna say thank you for your every cmts bcz that lifts me up!!
@@falgunipatel2284 Falguni check out his channel , he is so underrated!!
His quality content and video quality , both are great ! :))
Thanks for sharing this quote.😻
@@Sunflower_that_loves_you I really appreciate that :)))
Sometimes it's hard to take a break, when you have a anxious mind
"Accept ourselves as we are, RIGTH NOW" -- I love it. Thank you Aileen for all the inspiration!
thank you! 💜
wait why was I on the exact time the video played that when I read your comment😂
i feel so useless. my motivation is gone, and i do not see a future for myself. negativity and laziness has consumed me after beginning college. i cannot express how much i want to study, focus and complete my assignments, yet i cannot do it. thank you for the advice, i hope i will get out of this slump soon💗
I felt that so much when I was trying to go to school too. Maybe school isn’t for you right now, I know I couldn’t do it.
Same I don't have motivation anymore especially my brother will graduate while im so lazy and no motivation at all
Same I’m a second year uni student and I’m so burnt out omg
You will make it, don’t give up. Keep going
@@butcjesaaa143 keep going, you will do well😊
This made me so emotional...i didn't realise that the reason I'm struggling to keep routines is because of the expectations I have of myself and how far away I feel am from what I think my life should be like.
I don't appreciate the progress, I'm always thinking I need to improve.
Honestly same here 😢
same dude :)
Exactly 😶
Me too ❤️🩹
More power to you..God bless
I'm so glad so many people found this video
111!
Numbing ourselves in social media and scrolling through videos
so real.
Man we're too young to feel like this
excalty that is what I tell myself I just turn 36 and I feel soo unmotivated to do much of anything. I hate that feeling I don't really have any friends or a gf 😕. I don't talk to anyone really. and if anyone calls me it's usually just to use me. I use to be full of energy and motivation when I was younger going to school,working, working out at the gym I had quite a few friends. now all I do is go to work and come home and repeat the cycle. I do have a 9 yr old boy.
fr :(( too young to let the world wreck us
@Clasic Man Midlife is 50.
Not even 30 🥺😫
15 year old right here!✋
When she started crying at "I literally want to do nothing" I immediately cried, too. It felt so surreal that I'm seeing someone else experience the burden I'm feeling. My family has always had a strong personality and I've always been a very emotional person. I placed such high expectations on myself because they did the grind and they turned out fine. What's wrong with me? I did so much yet I'm getting nowhere. I didn't realize that everything just piled up and I couldn't take it anymore. Just like Lavendaire said we need to accept our feminine side too. We all need rest to be more in tune with ourselves.
Yes, balance is key. Wish you the best 🤗❤️✌️
I was always hard on myself too. My family also, not that much but enough that I can tell, are the grinding type. But this quarintine (that I'm still voluntarily under) is taking such a toll, I couldn't handle stressful situations, so I ended up quitting two classes. Now I'll be in university another year. I was so angry and dissapointed I hadn't put up with them, but the moment I didn't attend to that class, I felt so freed and relieved. Whatever you stopped doing to rest, I congratulate you. Just as it is important to find strenght to continue, is even more important to have the strengh to stop.
SAAAAAAMEEEEE
@islandfox po 9
I can relate big time......
She’s the only person , that cares because other than her video all the videos we’re calling me lazy and unmotivated and I really feel understood when she said “burnt out “ ,I’m in my final year of Med school and I feel exactly that , thank you ❤️
Hey, I too am in final year of med school and here I found your comment
The pressures of society can be overwhelming...
I’ve been afraid of taking breaks because I feel like I’m wasting time but I can’t do anything because I’m so tired mentally and physically. I will take your advice. Thank you so much
Samee:
Exactly the same...
Same, sweeties:'(
exactly , I feel the same. due to this my routine has become mess
I feel exactly same ...
I started crying while watching this. What sucks is that I live with my Asian parents. I can’t even cry out all my feelings because they always end up making me feel bad even though they have good intentions with trying to help me. I wish I lived alone so that I could heal alone, but I could never do that when I’m stuck with my parents. It’s an endless cycle for me: if I don’t get the space I need to heal, I won’t have a clear mind to be my best self. I can’t perform as well as I need to in order to get a job, and that means I can’t move out.
I can understand through what you are going and how you feeling because I'm going from the same situation. Just give it a some time,everything is gonna be okay 👍
I can totally understand and relate to you. You can try something which is literally helpful for me:
1. Do self love (positive) by looking at yourself in the mirror
2. If you want to cry, go to the bathroom and cry
3. In order to clear your mind you can do journaling (pen down your feelings)
4. Either you try to wake up one hour before your parents or sleep after your parents have fallen asleep and at this time you can do meditation (basically focus on your breath) or you can do some yoga or positive self talk
5. Read one motivational quote everyday and keep recalling that motivational quote throughout the day
Just chill, everything gonna be okay. You can do whatever you wish if you have clear mind and goal 👍🏻
I physically can't cry. I am okey, I hope you, too
I feel the lack of work is what's causing alot of the terrible feelings you have. After being jobless for a while I truly understand just how important it is to have something that'll get you out of bed in the morning or out into the world. Do your best and even if the job isn't much, give it a go and no joke, try to stay busy
@@saumiyasrivastava6485 thank you for your supportive suggestions
Who is watching 2024 😢
I was highly motivated, in my case I think because of loneliness
me 2025🙌
Everything feels like a chore lately.
🫂
Hope everything is good now, and much respect gecko
Especially the chores.
Laundry and dishes. Why can't I get myself to do them???
1.let yourself rest
2.give yourself love
3.shift your focus
4.stop consuming contents that makes you feel worse
5.accept yourself as you are
6.go into nature
7.understand that life happens in cycles
8.start with baby steps 😇💗
9.Find gratitude 💕💫
Thank you Star key for summing up all the points here! ❤️😇
school / study is the content 😢😂
doesnt help such a bullshit
I'm grateful for this video which describes exactly how I feel today. I plan to do exactly 2 things to help myself feel better. Exercise, ( I will walk outside, which stimulates endorphins and gives me some natural Vitamin D ) and wash my hair. Self care is very important. I also plan to eat little and lightly. Not overburdening an already stressed body is another way to feel better. Thanks so much for the encouragement. My oldest cat, ( I bred him and saw him come into the world,) he was 15, died about 10 days ago. Plus I'm dealing with a possible torn Rotator Cuff injury so I'm not feeling stellar. I was encouraged by this though. Thank you!❤
Thankyou
What's even more frustrating is the feeling of being guilty of not being productive, and thinking that you could have done more or given yourself a better life if you have better time management skills. And even that itself causes demotivation, and the fact that it causes ypu to be lazy makes you even more depressed. Lol idk if that makes sense
It makes sense , In fact this is the reason why most people cant take rest/give themselves more time to relax . The same thing kinda happened to me but in different way btw have a good day :)
omg this is exaclty how i feel 🥺
That's me now :'D
Soo truee😶😶
It does
It just really hurts cause i was just about to find myself but i suddenly lost it again and i hope i and anyone suffering will make it and restore what they lost during the hardtimes each one of us faced...
Same. I felt things were slowly improving, and I was so hopeful for this year, but then in early February my boyfriend broke up with me. It set me back so much, and I just feel anxious and depressed everyday.... I feel so lost and hopeless. 😔
We were planning to move in together in a few months, spoke about getting engaged, and planned to start trying for a family in the next year. Now I feel like everything is gone. 💔 I'm in my late 30s so it's hard to start again... I'm just heartbroken, and I feel like I'm frozen in this state where simple tasks seem so difficult, and it's hard to stay focused at work.
I'm so grateful I found this video... I feel a little less alone. I hope we're all able to get back to where we were and on a healthier, happier path. 🩷
This line was too good"Instead of focusing what's going wrong in your life focus on what's going right in your life "
Thank you for making this video❤
Her: If you feel like this, slow down
College: Nope
Me: dies
That's the sad truth...felt unmotivated yesterday and felt like doing nothing but school work won't slow down for you to 'recover'
@@midekuts I know. And it’s sad because I really like what I am studying but at this point I am so burnt out that I am not able to enjoy it anymore :(
@@oiqueleria omg i totally understand you. I started my masters degree during this pandemic, haven’t even met the people I’m studying with because Zoom lol and my exam weeks start next week and I can’t even make myself get up from bed 😞 and teachers don’t even care that it’s stressful to be studying online for a year already without any interaction
i feel so lazy. i have like 10 unfinished assignments and some are from last year ): i feel like everyone else in my class manages just fine, and im so ashamed of myself.. i really want to get good grades to get my dream job, but i constantly lose faith in myself.. it sucks
@@elsie4802 dang, that does suck :( i hope you'll be able to relax and recharge sometime really soon so you can enjoy your classes and get everything done. and don't worry or beat yourself up, the people in your class aren't managing everything perfectly all the time. celebrate your small victories and baby steps, and don't be ashamed of needing time to heal :)
"Instead of focusing on what’s going wrong in your life,
focus on what is still going RIGHT."
~ Lavendaire
Nothing is going right in my life😓
Here I am watching this video again after a year, so much has changed for me now, I'm much more stable and happy now, and I'm so glad I kept going. Stay strong & hang in there y’all💗
Thank you for the hope 🙏🌸
@@jd6331 It will get better 🤍
This really saved me today and I believe will save me plenty more times in the future. Thanks Aileen! I do fall for the trap of blaming myself for 'not doing' when I am in this state, and that definitely makes me feel worse, as I end up tired AND angry at myself. You are a bright light and I am so grateful I found your channel 🙏🙏🙏
thanks for your support 💖
I needed this. xx
Sending you love 💗
Sending u love, Lana. ❤
The topic, and the message, this video reminded me a lot of yours ❤️
Lana!
You both are awesome.
This is exactly how I felt since the beginning of the pandemic. I recently deleted my Instagram, TikTok, and Facebook. My mental health feels like it has gotten a little bit better. I want to be at peace within myself. I want to experience more things in life instead of scrolling away on social media. We all deserve happiness.
Ive felt this way for 10 to 20 years
Same
We have to focus on how we feel after scrolling through social media, it's all very toxic and can leave us feeling like we're not good enough
“i want to experience more things in life instead of scrolling away on soc med” THIS
I cant uninstall facebook because we need school account for our online class, to check for some announcement in our school page 😭😭😥
Man this made me cry because I’m nervous, scared, excited too but more fear energy than usual for my future. I’m a 23 year old entrepreneur that feels sooooo drained ever since last December. I feel like I’m not excited as I used to be, I feel like I’m in derealization mode like I’m not really living i have a view of just autopilot and feeling that I’m not in control/ it’s so weird but I just wanna ask for this RUclips community to pray for me. I may post videos like I’m fine but no deep down I’m trying to heal , I love yall always especially those that go through this 🖤 thank you for this video
♥️♥️
I have had burnout lately with life and working in mental health care. As you may pour yourself into others, you have to pour into yourself too. I love how you said you have to practice unconditional love and to practice forgiveness. We all need to practice self love.
i really needed to hear this rn… i didn’t realize how badly the expectations i had for myself were burdening me and i felt terrible for feeling burnt out. thank you !!
samee😔 I'm not even enjoying life anymore. when something good happens I can't even celebrate it coz I just feel so empty
Same
@@palesamphatsoe959 pull yourself by your boottraps and be productive.
honestly the vid didnt help i stil wanna do what ii had to do
@@palesamphatsoe959 same.
You have no idea how much this helped me. I thought I was crazy and my mental health was spinning out of control. I thought I was broken and I could never reach my goals. Now I have a new perspective and rather than pushing myself past my limits I’m going to focus on taking things one step at a time. Thank you ❤️
Virtual hugs people. I feel you ❤️🩹
Agreed. This video was a blessing
God dang you good bro?
Keep smiling ✌🕊🙏
I'm feeling the same right now. I actually stumbled on this video and I hope fortunately it'll help me. Btw,How are you now ?
Thank you so much for this. As a man, I didn't know I was allowed to rest. What a timely word for me. God bless you sister!
I've been feeling unmotivated for a long time and honestly at first i thought that people just push forward and accomplish things even when they're down, but you made me realize that you have to take care of yourself, relax and try to heal inorder to move forward which we don't pay attention when feeling low. Thank you for making this video! It helps a lot and i also enjoyed it and liked the filming of nature. I wish you well ❤
1. let yourself rest
2. give yourself love
3. shift your focus
4. stop consuming content that makes you feel worse
5. understand that life happens in cycles
6. start with baby steps
7. find gratitude
It was a very good video. The biggest thing that changed my life though was cleaning up my health...eating better (fruits and veggies give natural energy) and taking supplements for vitamin deficiency (good to get this checked out by a doctor). Also, going to the doctor and taking care of health issues....Some people have ongoing infections, bacterial or fungal, and don't even realize it. I had one for years after living in a moldy house. Mold can make you very sick! I had to change my environment. A photocatalytic air purifier was very helpful. Also, decluttering my house (clutter can zap your brain energy).
Drink plenty of good water and breath in clean air! Deep breathing is wonderful. Also, and here's a big one--don't ignore your spiritual life. God can and wants to help you...He loves you and answers prayer. :) Reading a devotional and prayer in the morning changes my whole day and gives me positive energy! Peace to everyone.
Thank you for the main points
@@miketaiwanwalkcity6355 np
@@steph6453 that’s really dope, hope you continue with your successful journey and thanks for the tips
@@t.brothers Hey, thanks, and you, too! :)
I've been crying, feel useless, and unmotivated because of unemployment. Every day, just stare at my inbox, waiting for a reply, but nothing but glad I found your channel. It eases me a bit about life. Thank you. I need this.
Hey, 💖 try to get a coach, someone that will help you to improve on some skills. Also is a good idea to volunteer.
You are not alone...don't be to hard on yourself.
Omg. The situation you go through same like me. My age turn 26 this year. But still i did not have a stable job. I feel like im useless to my family. And it distracted me all the time stuck in my brain. I was depressed thinking of that
You will get a more stable job.. hang on there buddy, be patient.. don't lose hope.. just fix ur dream position and run towards it.. am also unemployed i did nothing for past 3 years bcz of breakup. Now i set something and i working for that.. so i know ur feelings.. just wait and hope.. keep working ❤
I am so tired of everything in this world I'm just stressed about the future I don't even know and I was just doing good a couple of weeks ago
How are you doing today?
Going thru a breakup. Im living alone and I needed this. Thank you.❤
Same. Same. 😔 ....and I live alone too. I feel really lonely, especially on the weekends.
How are you doing today, madj? I'm about 9 weeks post-breakup.... And I feel so lost and broken, so anxious and depressed, unmotivated. 💔 I can't wait to feel better again. Hope you're healed at this point 🫶
0:03 Crying hits
Most of us are feeling this way, but we got this!
Yes, yes!
True
Same here🤯
So true, sending you loads of love, blessings and hugs lovely!! I feel you !! ❤️❤️✨
Same
THIS VIDEO IS PURE GOOOOOLD GIRL. Thanks for that.
A Lave and Vortex way fan over here 💫 sending loooveee
I'm really grateful for your amazing RUclips channel. You helped me more than you could ever imagine.
I wish you nothing but the very best thing in the world.
Te amo
aaaa no me imaginaba encontrarte acá Alexx
Absolutely correct. 😢😢😢
❤I just came up out of a 2 week slump. Single parent, people playing with my job 😮I called in 2 weeks straight and was just down, brain fog thicker than London fog. My kids helped me get back up and I accept I cannot control everything but all I can do is keep doing my part and take care of me and my kids. I’m in a better place now and we hung Christmas 🎄 decor last week and we are getting ready for Thanksgiving dinner this week and I have. 4 day weekend coming up! All the points u hit on are true and I did those things and now this video is in my feed! Thanks 😊
💜
There’s nothing to do, there’s no people, there’s no money, no family…. Literally no one, nothing!
I went through one of the worst phases of my life in January and I just wanna say I'm glad to be here. Glad I'm doing better. Everything *will* be okay. If you're reading this, you'll get through this.
thank you ❤️
proud of you
thank you 😩💛
Thank you and really proud of you 👏🏻
Yeah .. But I've been in this slump since lockdown... But I'm in such a better place than that time..
Everything she told in the video in absolutely trueee.. You go gurrrlll
The sad part about this is that I feel like that every week. I don't have much energy.
It might be something in your life (like your job) draining your energy or you might be dealing with depression. Maybe consider therapy.
I hate my job, I had applied for master's this year, but failed to get in, made a portfolio with the best of my ability...but it sucks! Everyone around me is moving forward! I'm just a lump in bed doing nothing & even if I want to...I'm unable to do anything. Like there's a never ending blank! I feel like I'm wasting my 20s away! :(
the other sad part? is the deadline
@@vedzyo6666 dude, at least you have a job, other people find it too hard to get a job. You don't need a master, you need CPA, CFA, and other certifications.
anyway, master is easy to get in, you're doing it wrong. they need your money anyway
@@MixSonaProductions Just because someone has a job doesn't mean their problems go away... Also, didn't really get your point about CPA, CFA, etc. I'm in the architecture field....so a master's is quite essential!
Thank you for making me realise that I don't have to be perfect all the time because whenever I am unable to finish a certain task I feel demotivated and unworthy but from now on I will give myself some time to heal and relax✨💙
I just had therapy, been crying for so long and I feel so extremely depressed and everything feels pointless... life feels pointless. and this is the first thing that popped up. thank you, Aileen.
Looks like you have been guided to something you need 😉
You’re not alone
Everything will be alright 😍😍... God bless you.. May you get all the love and blessings you deserve
even if i dont know you, I love you.
I feel the same
The online classes and staying at home has been really getting to my mental health. I need socializing and going out, but most importantly traveling... Let’s all pray for this to end soon 😭💜
Same here 😪
more and more people are getting their vaccines and we are closer than ever. hang in there
Hi army
@@stopsubscribingtothischann394 Hey there ARMY❤️
Couldn't relate any better😭💜
I started to cry straight away because this is exactly how I feel right now. I didn't know what to do about it either which just got me frustrated. Seeing this video gave me hope. Thank you so much! ❤
Oh sweetie,me too! We've got this❤❤
When she said "your situation and your feelings will change"
Thanks for this video✨
I want to cry - thank you for this ❤️
OMG bliss bean it's here😍
It's ok to cry it'll make you feel better. (Btw love your channel)
Omg Beatrice! I love your channel!
I did cry 😭❤
Me too :(
i think im crying because i feel so understood. this is the first video that has really spoke TO me.
Yes. Absolutely correct.
🥺
I know, right!
True
“you might be going through a tough time rn but it will pass”
i needed that to hear that so badly right now
I feel like this rn 😭 i felt so exhausted for a while then finally i rest for days then i lost all motivation i have no more energy or positivity to do anything....
It is so natural for me to WANT to rest and allow my feelings to heal. But others are so pushy and tell me to get up and get outside and get some sun and be productive and it makes me feel so much worse.
I’m so sorry for that. I can only imagine that makes it worse
Same!! I know the feeling it sucks!!!!!
I can understand that. I push myself everyday. I feel worse!
I’m going through the exact same thing. I want to relax and take things slow, achieving my goals bit by bit but my parents keep telling me to stop being lazy and go outside. It’s all this pressure and expectation they have on me that’s effecting my mental health. They don’t realise that I’m trying my best and how difficult my situation is. I dislike society’s expectation on young people, how your suppose to be at this stage at this age etc. When everyone’s journey in life is different.
The problem with me is that I never do anything. I started homeschooling at the start of this year. I haven't done anything. Recently I have been in the house all the time and struggling to get work done. Literally exhausted from doing nothing. My anxiety has been through the roof this past week. Feeling like I'm failing everything. Scared for my future cos of how low my confidence is and how unmotivated I am. Hopefully I can pull myself together soon
I think that you are not doing anything because you are overwhelmed with all the things that you need to do, I recommend finding ways to motivate yourself to do really little things so you can build confidence again, focusing on how you feel and why you feel a certain way (ask yourself really specific questions so you can understand what your body is trying to tell you) and reassuring you that everything will fall into place no matter what. Of course I know that this might be difficult at first and that it's not going to completely change your life, but it's a way to start building a new routine slowly and learn things by yourself, you've got this
Your future you will really thank you for what you do now. Try not to fall into that long-term comfort for some discomfort.
I’d say try to positively encourage yourself and trick your brain in to trying it for 10 mins so that you at least get started and of course the usual, take a break every now and then, take care of yourself, etc.
All the best, you’ve got this ✊🏼
@@_littleangel_ thank you so much for that. I really needed it ❤️
@@mandeep3.14 thank you so much❤️
im in a similar situation and i can’t express how much this comment made me feel less alone; although i don’t have much advice but i do recommend setting small goals and working yourself up to the bigger things,, please be kind to yourself and take it easy
I haven't heard such wiser words when it gets too much
Everything you said rings very true. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. I relate to all you are saying ❤
thank you!!
I am feeling very down at the moment, burnt out, and for a month now, I've been afraid of falling into a low state. I've battled with depression for a long time, and it's been over a month since I've felt much better, but the fear of feeling low again lingers. Watching this video brought me to tears, especially when the phrase "simply existing" was mentioned; it struck a chord with me. Perhaps I've found the answer to a question that has always plagued me: "What is the ultimate outcome of life and being alive?" The answer is simply existing, allowing myself to be who I am, and flowing with the tide of life. Thank you for reminding me of the beauty in our existence.
sending you love & light 💗 i appreciate you!
how did she know how I was feeling? 😭
honestly same ;-;
Sameeee
Because that's the energy we are all feeling collectively. Many transformations are taking place, right now.
rightttt i-
Same here😂
I literally spent all day doing nothing and just layed in my bed all day. I was feeling so guilty and blaming myself for being so lazy. Thanks for changing my perspective! I really needed this.
i love that you mentioned that while media can be entertaining it ultimately subconsciously makes you feel bad about yourself
I've been running away from my research, delaying my study schedules, etc. last year of college (hopefully) has been very difficult, stressing, and putting myself in my lowest state. I know running away from it is bad and in the end I still have to face it. I tried to get on my laptop, opened the important file, but I had my phone in my hand scrolling through youtube. Thanks youtube for popping this video on among the search results. I can't lie I cried cause all the words were relatable and true, I need to heal before I get ready to face it again. Love, x
Update: on May 31st, I gained my judicium and now expecting the graduation ceremony in 2 months🥰
I feel the same way too. Thank you for sharing! Warm wishes!
As she said it's a cycle...Without the lows you won't appreciate the highs and that nothing's going to stay the same !
me too 😭😭😭 now literally at the end of my degree and like ..... how do i do this 😭 tomorrow is my viva dy 😭😭😭😭😭 i am scared that i will fail and then having to repeat
Me too. How can I finally escape this. It doesn't feel like life
Keep your head up!
Oh gosh, I was honestly expecting advice like "make a to do list", "eat healthy", "work out", .... but this is so much more insightful! Your advice in this video feels so relatable, comforting and actionable. This is so needed and hits the spot exactly. I feel so understood and I appreciate you for sharing this so much! Thank you!
Yesss I'm so tired of listening to the same advice 😔
Thanks for sharing about nothingness and somethingness.
Without being in nothing, there is no something tomorrow.
Found this video right when I needed it.
I’ve had depression for over 7 years and sometimes when I compare myself to others I forget that these people don’t go through what I’ve been through and that I have my own burdens that I often underestimate.
Thank you for reminding me that sometimes it’s okay to not feel okay and do nothing to feel a little bit better.
The problem is getting out of the “doing nothing” for me
I feel the same way for 3 years. I feel like I am stuck, I am constantly running away from every problem and I am feeling extremely unmotivated to do anything. I fight with fear of failing and my mind keeps telling me that I am not good enough. So when I tried to find new hobby (bc I don't have one), I instantly gave up, bc I didn't believe in myself...And the hardest part is that I really don't know what to do to feel and be better and how to change my life and my thinking...I feel trapped and helpless...
Same and i feel like we really need help.
@@Rosalinth I am experiencing this feeling too. It just lasts for years and I don’t know how to get out of it. I just feel terrible!
Maybe the app she presented can help you :) sometimes we need someone else to remind us of the truth about ourselves
@@Rosalinth have you red the book "Can't hurt my" by David Goggins. It's a real life changer!!
Since I graduated high school and got into uni, I became so unmotivated. I always have the feeling that I want to do nothing and whenever I want to study I can’t, I feel so empty with no purpose in life. I just don’t know what’s going on with me, I keep on thinking of dropping out but I know it’s not the right thing to do.
Same with me
Same
Same 😓
same here, been feeling this since pandemic. Got job with good salary but still it felt empty, and i beat myself because i felt so ungrateful
@@kreisti2726 I hope things get better for you and I as well as everyone who’s feeling the same way and don’t harm yourself, we all go through those times but we will get through it🤍
"This video has made therapy soo accessible to me"
I survived today!!
I’m proud of u ❤
"A small effort is still an effort". That helps me sooo much, thank you!
I can't believe this showed up when i needed it the most. Miracles are real
yes they are
Me too😭😭
Yesterday I ended up walking on the streets in a sad and overwhelmed state, after finishing work. I skipped my sports class but didn’t want to go home either. So I walked. I ended up finding a beautiful trail with secret gardens alongside, and decided to visit my parents afterwards which they were so grateful for.
Today everything feels different. It was raining all morning but I decided to visit the forest anyway. Half an hour ago the sun suddenly started shining brightly and I sat down to listen to your video. I followed your advice and opened my notebook, and the first thing that came into my mind was to write: ‘I feel blessed to be alive’.
Thank you Lavendaire, you are making a lot of impact with your videos.
I literally searched - "burnout and unable to do anything" and found this. It was exactly what I needed to hear! Thank you! 🙏😓
Do you feel like you don't get happy anymore doing stuff you loved to do once? Or doing anything at all?
@@legendgaming1728 yes I feel the same !
It's easier to grant yourself the need to ''do nothing" when you have a good balance of a work and social life. But if youre someone who regularly is unmotivated and almost daily does nothing, then "doing nothing" becomes torturous. Instead, you're in four walls of enclosed anxiety and rumination, but you just can't motivate yourself to get out of your room to do something about it.
I completely understand! I was thinking the same thing as I watched this video. As a young adult I was stuck for years but then I stumbled upon my purpose in life and everything changed. For 25 years I was so busy fulfilling that purpose that I didn't even have time to question if I felt like doing anything. Then I suffered a huge trauma and my life came to a halt. It's been 7 years since then and I haven't felt able to do the simplest things. Just taking a shower and shaving my legs seems like an insurmountable task! To make matters worse, my sister who is 3 years older is going through the same thing and we live together. I think I may have a fear that if and when I do get back into a productive life, I will be so busy and won't have the luxury of slowing down when I'm not feeling up to it. You can't just drop in and out of your responsibilities whenever you just don't feel like getting out of bed! That's probably why I stay in this state of paralysis. I'm afraid to do nothing and even more afraid to do something.....
@@cathyhowell1294 It's been four weeks since you wrote this. I sincerely hope you're feeling better. If you're not tho, read this. I get that the luxury of not doing anything isn't really there all the time. I know how hard the pressure can be. What I'm getting at is, since you're already feeling the paralysis and are unable to do anything... how about not pressuring yourself. I think the reason you're unable to get out of this is because you're adding to the pressure instead of lifting it, and you need to lift it. So stop feeling guilty that you're not doing anything. Start seeing this period of not doing stuff as a mechanical spring; once completely charged, it'll give you a huge boost towards the "productivity" you're looking for. I wish you all the best.
The rumination itself is the fighting against “doing nothing”. You are not “doing nothing”. You are still mentally resisting it.
@@padmasai5433 yeah, it’s too much for me as well
@@ashlee7831 wow well said, that’s exactly what’s going on. Allowing yourself to relax without the guilt helps you recharge to motivation; otherwise, you’re defeating the purpose of “doing nothing”.
Hi loves! ✨ We just launched a new community program ft. masterminds and monthly live events for personal growth & wellness! Learn more & join here → lavendaire.com/DLC 🫶
You're beautiful
The world is fake.
Anxiety has literally paralyzed me. Wake up to anxiety, struggle with it all day and just try to stay alive. I just dont know what to do anymore and feel like im gonna be like this forever and that is freaking terrifying.
ify
*"Our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time."*
I believe in you my friend, never give up...
Awee yeah that's a sweet reminder!
This has hit me right in my core. I have been feeling so unmotivated, sad, lost with searching for a purpose to move on. It's hard to let go and rest without feeling guilt.
You are not alone
You are not alone, I am going through the exact same thing.
Going thru this now and being emotionally tired...
@@harshitapant1897 hey hy
@@shalinimishra2623 hey
Thank you. I watched while doing self-care and it made it run smoothly and not feel like i have to do it but because I am loving it and i need not to be hard on myself. I have been hard on myself such that I even got feedback from people who are not close to me without even asking. I had a lot of expectations, and others' expectations that drained me and made me hate myself, ignore self-care and self-love.
Slowing down has been the hardest thing for me but I learnt that this is what God wanted for me. To slow down and love who i am the way i am. Indeed God is Kind, He loves me and still cares about me. I love Him too🙏🏽
Thank you ☺️
i was crying while listening to your words. thank you for creating this safe space where we can all breathe.
yess❤
When you said "if you don't know what your intuition is telling you so maybe you need a break before it tells you what to do next" resonated so much for me. I've been forcing answers out of myself instead of giving myself time and space to breathe. I will try to trust that in the peace, the answers will reveal themselves.
You so spoke for me. I have been forcing God to give me direction.
Well, that's the same thing I'm going through rn.
How are you now?
I hope you are doing well.
Literally me right now so grateful we want to find better ❤️
Having high expectations and not meeting them I can extremely relate, I'm a student and I had high expectations with my school grades and I never met them and now I'm so unmotivated, always discouraged and lazy to study, anyways I love what you doing and just keep on doing it ❤️
Hi same study is really the reason you got these lots of love❤️
Well, I feel the same. Btw, how are you now?
@@itsherlifee I just wanted to say that it's really sweet you asked that to a random person. Hope you're also doing okay :))
@@Alyxlightqxstar Yeah , I kinda am doing well . Hope you are doing well too. Have great day .
I needed this video so bad. I was sick for two weeks and now I’m fine but I feel sort of uncomfortable going outside. Before this I used to go out by myself all the time but now I’m scared to do anything on my own.
The point about STOP CONSUMING CONTENT THAT MAKES YOU FEEL WORSE is super key here imo, because oftentimes it is content we consume all the time or are even our favorite content creators. For me, when I'm feeling this period of lows, I have to stop watching content about productivity and hustling. The only thing I can really watch without feeling any pressure is ASMR. Being in tech, I would constantly watch tech videos and I realized that I felt like I was being so useless and unproductive compared to these RUclipsrs. Just a reminder that sometimes your fav channels may be bad for you in a state of low. I would try out ASMR, slow living, and peaceful living type videos. But just be careful not to compare your life with others.
This is so true!
You're right. I didn't realize how my vision board/motivation board is causing me all this anxiety. Looking at it constantly only reminds me what a piece of trash I am that's rotting away. Thank you.
So true! I haven't notice but yes, even the most inspiring videos and even the content that isn't about productivity as such is causing me some kind of FOMO. Thoughts like "I shouln't just consume, but make content too" etc. are constantly with me while browsing my bubble on Social Media. Like a never ending battle of myself against time while the motivation to get started is getting lower and lower due to this pressure. I really enjoyed this video and reading your comment. It made me realize some really important things. Thank you
So right
this was literally me all of this week. I did nothing and just read a lot, went on walks and took many showers. I think I'm reaching burn out and I definitely needed this week to relax and stop go-go-going
I’m actually reading Burnout - The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle by Emily Nagoski, PhD & Amelia Nagoski, DMA.
I got it at Target for 15% off. So far I’m really liking it & taking a TON of notes!
@@kristenm2962 Thank you for the recommendation!!! Im going to go get this book!!
Yes i can, i will
I don't want to have any more expectations on myself and make myself completely surrender in work, but i will surrender myself away from all stress
I really needed this. Thank you! ❤
2 days ago i felt so motivated and productive , I studied so well and was so excited all the time. I know i can do anything if I’m comfortable, confident and happy. But the point is I can never be like that. Yesterday i could be happy but today I feel depressed and there’s a hollow in my heart. I don’t even know why.. i’m scared and feel like everything is unfair. I hate the fact that I can’t be satisfied with everything im having right now. And im envious of ppl who feel content, know and accept who they are. I can’t be like that...
Jesus can fill that in your heart. I've felt that way before, and God is the only way I know that can make me feel content for longer than a few moments.
@@annmariestephens4285 that does not work for many people. What works for you does not work for someone else. Alot of religion is built on NOT accepting yourself. Relgious women in particular seem very unhappy, but try to hide it.
I felt like that too... I still do..
I was going to say Jesus also! He loves you and made us to have a relationship with Him.
@@ayshafareed4935 There's a difference between man-made religion and spirituality, a relationship with Jesus. :) A lot of religious people don't even have a relationship with God, because they're too focused on their own works. When He was on earth, Jesus even spoke out against the religious spirit...His concern is a relationship with us, not praying to statues or counting prayer beads. There's a saying: "Religion is belief in someone else's experiences. Spirituality is having your own experience." No one else can have your spiritual experience with God but you. :) And if you don't engage with Him, how will you even know what that relationship is like? You'll know what you've been missing. I sure did. God bless you! :)
"a small effort is still an effort"💕
I feel so much better now...I've been being very hard on myself because of my parents' expectations for years...but now, I want to be gentle with myself because I deserve it ...tysm ❤
whats crazy is that i told myself this and then gaslighted myself into thinking this was invalid. This is such a great confirmation for me cause i felt like not doing anything was just lazy and that i couldve been doing something this whole time. love this video ❤️
when you're on a 9 to 5 job.. I just get so burned out after work and don't want to do anything. even during weekends I'm just so drained that I wasn't able to achieve anything I don't even pursue my hobbies anymore.
Yeah it's difficult. I have an 8-5 as well and an evening job 6-12 as well including weekends (6-8 he shifts). Idk how to slow down now since my time is taken to work and still trying to perfect meal planning to save money and eat. I hope things get easier.
Same.... i just want to be in bed....kids full time job sidehustle. Useless husband. I am so sick of life.
I’ve never related to anything more than this. I want to cry.
Yes, I completely relate. It’s tough because I know I could do so much more than what I am doing. I self sabotage because I beat myself up so bad for procrastinating, to the point where I do absolutely nothing rather than try and potentially failing. I failed my classes because of this mindset; I went from a straight A student to not even going to class for months. I can’t handle all this stress. I know it’s all in my mind and I know none of what I’m telling myself is true, which makes it even more frustrating.
I’m the poster child of a gifted overachiever child, who let all the praise manifest into strict expectations of myself.
SIGH
Omgosh... why is this me? I struggle so much, I feel like every other week is a dramatic change especially the weekend. It'll either be I'm doing all my hobbies I like but couldn't go outside because that's a lot and the commute to work is too much so I just don't wanna travel. I tried to get ppl to remind me or dare me once but they just forgot and I didn't wanna go in detail about how much I needed external motivation so I said it's okay but it wasn't. Then other weekends I try and maybe I'll get part of the morning good but then I feel like I go very hard on escapism. Then I get sad because I feel so disconnected from everyone and idk where my life is going because it feels like it's one step forward and two steps back *sigh*
But like Taylor said, "at least I'm trying"...
The fact that she watched herself crying while editing the video and yet didn't cut it down was so empowering
You're so strong
It takes so much strength to do that
I would never imagine myself doing it
i don't get why society wants us to hide negative emotions. i feel guilty whenever I'm expressing complaint about my feeling unwell in that moment, overwhelmed or unmotivated etc, cause i feel judged to be someone who complains or lazy or else, I don't get why we aren't allowed to feel this way and express it when it's in our human nature. i hate this.
"just allow yourself to be, and rest."
I wish I could, I really do..but school..
I can relate
Thanks for being so vulnerable. As a plumber I'm really trying to take better care of myself. My physical therapist recommends changing jobs due to rotator cuff and back issues. It's hard to be grateful when you're always in pain but there's always hope.
there's always always always hope ♡
I'm crying watching this because I feel like such a failure and have lost control of my career, mental health, relationships, and all I want to do is sleep most times. I have a love/hate relationship with myself
@@hurtsoul7398 I love how even as you go through all of these things, you still ask how others are doing! You are so brave and so strong and always remember: with challenge comes change! So with all the challenges, change will happen, and it ALWAYS leads to something better! Life will always put you through tough times in order to being you to even better times than before! You all got this!❤❤❤
Your intro made me cry, because i can relate to it. I feel like im useless. your voice and your advice and sharing your experience to help people in need to those who feel the same way are so relaxing and make me feel good. but at the end of the day, that worst feeling comes back again.
I think a lot of the time we need to distract ourselves from our emotions and being caught up in them. I am a very emotional person and sometimes they consume me. I am going to try and learn mindfulness and DBT. best wishes, you are not alone! 💜
that is me right now
if you are feeling bad every time you are not distracted from it, you might need a therapist. Feeling useless all the time is a signal that something is wrong and If it's lasting for a while, it means you need some help from a professional, take it seriously !
Hello, be kind to your self and in time you can be happy again
Their is no need to cry if your still healthy enough to go outside... Feelings come and go and even if it takes days or weeks, you healthy guys are lucky...