" I didn't know that I was important enough to draw boundaries around what people could and couldn't do with my body" That line was so sad it took me form 0 to tears in an instant.
Yap, low self-esteem is huge in these cases. I knew of one girl who only reported her dad's assaults once he started assaulting her sister as well. She felt that it didn't' matter if he was molesting her as she was "nobody", but when it happened to her sister, she had to defend her.
My daughter felt the same. She said she went to her classmate room for drink and she said that even before tthe incident he was manipulating her she dismissed everything and she thought she could defend herself if he would do inappropriately to her while drinking. She said she had thus urge to drink with boys alone since she was shy to go to pubs. She said she can tolerate some things from boys even though she didnt like them.but after the rape she understood wholly how sacred her body is .. And after 2yrs broke to us that she was raped. I couldn't help her, i simply asked why you didnt tell this before. She said it wont be any use...she just thought that she pretended that it never happened and go on wit her life. She also said that she forgave her rapist the next day itself but in reality she is burning like hell. If ther would be no law i coukd have god knows what would i do to him. She is struggling and i am unable to see her like this. We don't want to report this.. I am just praying to god for her justice .
My mom was raped by her doctor... She even had his DNA on her clothes. It took her 2-3 years to actually make it a case. But somehow the judge believes the doctor and thought they both wanted it and it looked bad she waited so long. But I don't blame her! It was scary to even come forward finally. She ended up losing the case... So fucked up how it works out. I'm sure money played a part in it since he was hella rich too. My family stopped me from going into his building and busting his face in with a mental pipe.
@@electricityisgreat2767 It's actually concerning that still many sexual assault victims are too scared to report. The social stigma plays a part in that too
I never thought in my life that i would be that girl who finds a video about sexual assault so easy to relate to . i never thought this would be my life
Out of one of the 3 times I was raped, I decided to report it. I was drugged and unconscious when he raped me. A blood test showed the drugs in my system. And yet the detective I spoke to slut-shamed me so much that I ended up dropping the charges. I can honestly say that my experience with the Police felt more traumatizing than waking up the next morning naked and vomiting because what he drugged me with made me really sick. I want to say that you should always report it, but I know I would never do it again if the same situation were ever to arise. Sometimes there just is no justice to be had.
Kasha A I'm sorry you went through that, but do you understand why they ask the questions "did you egg him on", "did you get drunk" etc is because it's such a serious crime on both ends. While tou hve to deal with aftermath personally, the police have to deal with the law which give them no leeway on how to operate. Not only that but they don't want to go court with little evidence because it wastes money. Since rape is hard to prove in court because there almost always little to no evidence backing up the claim. What you see as slut shaming, literally might just have been normal police procedure, not only that but imagine how many times that single police officer had a similar story told to him. It becomes numbing, overwhelming, irritating and deppressiong. Now I understand you might say "it is about me I was raped" while that's true your not the center of the universe the process is extremely complex, with more factors being apart of the outcome then you can possible immagion. Sorry though you had to go through suchba trumitizing experience.
@@Paragons_Delight - "What you see as slut shaming, literally might just have been normal police procedure, " --- Or it was slut-shaming. The police have a far larger, provable history of that than, oh, it was just procedure. Netflix just released a movie very similar to Kasha's story. A woman was raped and shamed into rescinding her story. And a serial rapist was never pursued until 3 years, and 5 rapes later. That happened in 2008, the 21st century, not decades ago. For someone who is "sorry" she had to go through this, you basically told her what she had to say and what she felt was worthless. Next time, if you have nothing positive to contribute in such a situation, don't say anything at all.
@@Paragons_Delight By the way that you're defending the cops, I'm going to assume that you're either a male, a cop, or someone who has never been raped before. Because what you're saying is BS.
I didn't report it because I felt it was partially my fault, I had no proof, I wanted to pretend it didn't happen & the police probably wouldn't believe me. A year & 1/2 later. I'm trying my hardest to heal
Taylor Chantae I've been going the self help route. With faith, prayer & trying to give it all to God. If it wasn't for that, I don't know what I would've done. Still going one day at a time. Learning how to trust guys again.
@@MrSoumyaBanerjee If I didn't exist the percentage of rapists per 100,000 people would be higher, and so would the number of rapes. You clearly disagree with my opinion. So do you recommend replacing the 'say no to strangers' signs at schools with signs that read 'stay away strangers' then because it makes kids feel safer if they don't have to do anything? Children might feel safer if they don't learn about dangers and how to deal with them, but really do you honestly think we should simply not bother to teach them how to be safe just so they "feel safer" ? If a paedophile lures your child into his car, are you saying you wouldnt blame the child at all??? I would say 'what did I tell you about strangers?' so they dont make the mistake again. But you seem to think it is better saying something like 'it wasn't your fault you didn't listen, the stranger is entirely to blame.' If the child didnt know of the dangers, then I'd say the child is not to blame in any way. Unfortunately feminists realise this, that's why you will hear them chant 'don't teach us how not to get raped'.
@@kirkclarke7396 Listen kiddo, there is a difference between a cause and effect relationship and moral burden . If a kid doesn't get into a car with a pedo then obviously they would be keeping themselves safer (although the same holds true for the pedophile and to a much greater extent, since many, if not most, sexual predators prey on multiple people). But the kid absolutely has no moral burden to bear. Why don't we teach more men to explore their sexuality in a more healthy manner? That too bears a cause and effect relationship with the issue. And I'm a man btw let me tell you that I have met many of your ilk. Most of them got jailed eventually. People who nourish an environment which makes sexual assault difficult to prosecute and worsens the mental health of survivors are no better than rapists in my eyes.
@@MrSoumyaBanerjee I know the difference but are you seriously using that example to explain the difference? Kids cannot choose not to be kidnapped! If they know to say 'no' to strangers it makes it more difficult for the paedo because paedos have to force the child into their car (which I doubt would be a problem) however by forcing the child to enter, the child will resist via screaming etc and alert others and thus probably get away without being harmed. If the child believes there are no strangers about because the signs work, the child will be kidnapped. Cause and effect. You don't seem to understand personal safety, not many do, but there are many things people can do to reduce their risks. If you follow one piece of advice and ignore the rest just to feel safe, you won't be safe. Plenty of women say they covered up but still got raped. The fact they were drunk, alone etc and not taking personal safety seriously doesn't seem to be a factor for them despite such advice being given by police. Here is an example of cause and effect: girl doesn't take responsibility for her personal safety, she gets attacked. Here is another: boy smokes, and eventually develops lung cancer. Unfortunately we live in a world with bad people. I am not one of those, the fact you know people who have been to prison doesn't support your argument, plus you only know a tiny fraction of people, so judging me on your personal experience is stupid. Everybody is different. Also, crimes against children like rape and kidnap barely have anything to do with sex, it is about violance. Shows how little you know. The people responsible for nourishing an environment where crime flourishes are those who tell people not to take personal safety seriously eg feminists who say 'don't teach us how not to be raped, teach men not to rape' and people who claim victims are totally blameless. It doesn't make people responsible, when asked why didnt you come forward sooner so others didn't get raped, they say its unfair to put that responsibility on me, the rapist should come forward. Women are getting raped multiple times because they are taught at a young age they are not responsible for anything bad that happens to them. Nobody can control other people, I'm not saying this, I'm saying people can take responsibility for their own safety and for others. If you think there is nothing victims can do since victims are blameless they will be weak, and rapists prey on the weak.
as someone who was assaulted and did report it then to be told asked: "did I lean him on? did I ask for it? did I regret it? Are you sure you didn't want it? are you sure it was rape?" then for the case to be thrown out because the bruises and marks weren't enough and that my story didn't match with his. I find myself wishing I didn't report it. that I should have just been quiet, no one would have came to my house and told me I was bitch for making stuff up or that I was lying for attention. the justice system messes up even if you case gets there or not.
I Will Be King I am so fucking sorry. my heart broke reading this. I pray for your healing ❤️ you are more than what happened to you. sending love your way
I Will Be King i had the same thing happen to me. he had his girlfriend call me and tell me if i didnt stop telling people what happened she would finish what he had started and kill me. the police do absolutely nothing and even when they can go to court the defense rips you apart by making you look promiscuous ect. and if you survive through that he will face minimal jail time.
I just want to give you a giant hug. I'm so sorry that happened to you. How dare his girlfriend say that to you, much less stick by him when she clearly knew what he had done?? You deserve so much better and I wish I could help you somehow. Just know you are loved and supported, even from far away, ok? :-)
"And I blamed myself for putting myself in that situation." This is relatable to literally all the girls / woman out there. The girls are taught to feel the guilt for the things they didn't even do. It has become the tradition in the society and it's fucking depressing.
Hi Hannah, my name is Kristen and I'm one of the women in this video. I'm so terribly sorry that happened to you; please know you are not alone! If you ever need to talk you can visit Avfti.org, where survivors share their stories and get support. Here for you girl. Xoxo
Hey there. Please know you're worth it. You're a whole, strong, beautiful person, and nothing someone else did to you can take that away. Please visit avfti.org for support, we're on your side, and you got this.
It's so crazy to see in this comment section how many people are victims. Being one myself and seeing how many more of you guys there are astonishes me. This world is disgusting.
I am so so sorry that happened to you 💕 I pray and wish and hope that person gets sent to jail 💕 wishing you the best, and please get therapy if you think that you need therapy, if not I hope you find a way to slowly, but surely, heal. If dwelling on it makes you feel worse, maybe try finding a new hobby or something that makes you forget, as much as you can, about this terrible and traumatising thing. You are a queen, and instead of possibly faulting yourself, recognize that it is NOT your fault and constantly, constantly remind yourself that you are strong and amazing and an incredible person. As a precaution, maybe you may want to take up self defense? I wish and pray that this never happens to you again and that it never happens to anybody else. I hope and wish and pray that whoever did that to you and other survivors and victims of rape dies a slow, terrible death and rots in Hell.
Im sad because I reported the man who sexually assaulted me and he didnt go to jail. He got away with it. I dont know what to do, I'm suffering from what he has done to me. Hes carrying on as if nothing has happened. I cant stop crying. He ruined me. He ruined my life. He took my body . Everything is going down hill. I'm failing all my classes, I lost my job all from depression and PTSD experienced by all of this. I hate the monster who did this to me. I was more hurt by the smile and him laughing when he was told hes not guilty. He looked right at me and once again too power over me. Hes living his life happy he got away with sexually assaulting me. I will never be the same person again
I went through the same thing. Seeing the guy who assaulted me smile in my face and ridicule me for what happened made me absolutely sick. I was angry, embarrassed and completely ashamed. I pray you'll have a turnaround soon. It's so hard to fight through everyday, especially at work.
@@nelodypond9282 I'm sorry it did happen to you as well. i hope these bastards lives turn out so shiity. i pray the same for you. it is hard and its not fair. I hate it when criminals get a way with crimes they have committed. I try to take it day by day but my biological father always bring it and blames me for it constantly.
I didn’t move, I just froze I smiled and pretended I wanted it, so I told myself after ‘it wasn’t rape’ ‘I was in control’ ‘I wanted it’. I couldn’t believe it was happening, I didn’t want people to think of me as ‘weak’.
Xenon Blaster so I experience the harsh reality of victim blaming people saying ‘why didn’t you say no or fight back’. People choosing sides of the truth they want to believe. I can’t. I’m not strong enough
thank you ladies for your stories. it's so hard to admit to yourself that you've been victimized, it's so hard to tell your family. it's so hard to live that moment all over again. it's hard to talk about it. thank you I'm not alone.
But not one single Dems spoke up about fake rape by supreme Court nominee,Dems cld care less about sexual assault,they lie about it and you ppl cheer, Hillary called women liars bill Clinton raped,Dems laugh about rape and the disgusting leftist say nothing,they make rape a joke,and make fun of Monica Lewinsky and harass REAL RAPE victims,Dems are truly sick mentally ill ppl to use rape for politics,but you say nothing
@@chizzelfingers that's not what this video is about? also your grammar made it painful to try to figure out what you wanted to say. i'm still not very sure
@@chizzelfingers that is not what this video is about, and also, have you heard the things Republicans have said about rape. “Rape is kinda like the weather. If it’s inevitable, relax and enjoy it.” “If it’s a legitimate rape, the female body has ways to shut that thing down.” “Rape victims should make the best of a bad situation.” “In the emergency room they have what’s called rape kits, where a woman can get cleaned out.” “If not for incest and rape ‘would there be any population left?” Republicans say just as vile things.
all of these women are so brave coming forward with there stories and im really sorry that happened to them this took alot of courage. its a shame the world we live in and how difficult it must be
47Cartoonguy their brave NOW. But alot of them got into the situations they were in because they lacked self worth. If they said "NO, I do have value and I will not be violated this way" it would be a whole different story.
@@spac3dandy206 STFU! There are women & yes men, sexually attacked from babies to senior citizens! Every race, religion, and socioeconomic background. No one wants to be prey to predators, or betrayed by someone they love, or trusted. Never sit too high and mighty in what you think you are, or what you're about because-many survivors did absolutely NOTHING wrong. Never pass judgement on a survivor, or their pain.
@@spac3dandy206 I think you need to look up the definition of rape. It's when sex is FORCED upon someone. Whether it be that they were unconscious, drugged, or literally physically forced it means they couldn't have done anything but fight harder. It's the rapist fault not the fucking victim you sicko.
I read somewhere that telling someone that "They should be more careful what they're wearing and how they are acting" Basically means: "Make sure he rapes someone else, not you." And that hit me so hard...
I'm a great example of being the someone else that was raped. It was either me or another girl who was with us. I'm glad she went home first, so I know she was safe. I knew his intentions too. Give someone the chance to take advantage of someone, and if plan a doesn't work out, they just hope for plan b, till they get lucky.
@@audreydoyle5268 i agree. Im sorry that happened to you. I have a similar story. So i get it. Just remember you are strong and you're gonna get through this. If you ever need anything feel free to message me and I'll try my best to help. I know it's easier to talk to people that understand what you've been through. Hang on and i hope life treats you well.
I am also a survivor. I was sexually assaulted when I was only 14 years old. I was a Freshman in high school and this boy, his name was Judson, he was assigned to the seat behind me in class. For the first few months everything was okay. Then, one day he decided to reach through the hole in the back of my chair and touch me. Nobody in the seats around me noticed. He then continued to do it every day for weeks on end. It was usually after school while I waited for Color Guard rehearsal to start at 3:30. I was in the sitting are on the second floor above the main commons and my then boyfriend Brendan was there and we were just talking. About 10 minutes later Judson come up to me and manages to convince me to play a game with him on his phone. So, we were just talking and playing the game until sudden;y he reaches over and puts his hand down my pants. I froze and just tried to get away but then he grabbed me and made me sit in his lap. He was hard and I could feel it. I tried to leave several times but he was stronger than me and held me back. He then proceeded to reach around and put his hand on my chest. By this point I was fighting and trying to get out of there but he pulled me back by my arm and turned around and pulled my hand towards his pants and made me touch him. I was horrified. What made it worse was the fact that Brendan was there and didn't do a thing. This is the first time I've ever shared my story and I haven't even told my parents yet because I'm scared they will be disgusted and blame me for not doing anything and not love me anymore. I know I need to tell them but I just don't know how. I am now newly turned 15 years old and I get nightmares about him and I was diagnosed with PTSD. I have made suicide attempts in the past. I don't know what to do anymore. I have already been to a hospital 4 times. What should I do? How do I tell my parents about Judson?
Since this was two years ago, you’re around my age, and that really hurts to know that this happened to you. I am so sorry. I can’t say I know what you’re going through, but I know you were genuinely seeking advice when you wrote this. I don’t know if you’ve already told your parents about this by now, but maybe you could show them this comment specifically? I feel like it captures a lot of the situation, and maybe having it in writing for them will make your story more coherent for them to understand. Coming to them and honestly telling them you don’t know how to approach the matter may be good too. No one really *knows* how to deal with this, so it’d be be good to start off with that if you decide to talk to them. If not done in this way, I hope you decide to confront the situation in the best possible manner for you. I hope you’re able to heal from this, and I’ll be praying for you. Also, I hope Judson faces real consequences for what he did to you. It is completely unacceptable, horrible, and wrong for people to take away someone’s autonomy like that, and I’m so sorry that this happened to you. Please know that this event in your life is not who you are, and I hope you come to know and feel that your life is still a one worth living. God bless you, truly. And please punch Judson in the gut, God.
You should tell your parents, what happen to you. Have a meeting with your parents. You can also have other trusted adult in the meeting. Another family member or counselor to be at the meeting. Picked a date, when you, your parents, and someone else, that you can trust. That everyone free from busy schedule. Explained to your parents what happen to you in the pass. If you’ve a counselor. The counselor can help out. Since the counselor is trained in this type situations. Hopefully your parents will be supportive of what happen to you in the pass.
How she said, "I could tell that something that I hadn't wanted to happen, happened.' I respect so much that these women were brave enough to come on camera and share their stories so that they may help others in feeling understood and heard. Thank you for sharing this.
I was 9 when I was sexually assaulted several times by the same man. I didn’t know I was getting fingered at all. And when I did get educated and realised about what happened, the man already moved to another country and joined the military. Even if I can report him, I won’t have any proof at all. Sometimes I would be just mad at myself for being dumb at that time and not knowing what he was doing to me. I never told this to anyone so it feels good now that I wrote it down into a paragraph.
I am so sorry that happened to you and I am survivor of sexual assault but it is not your fault for this at all and it is rapist and sexual assaulter’s fault for that.
2:12 I didn't know that I was important enough to draw boundaries around what people could and couldn't do with my body. Exactly what I thought when I was sexually abused. I was 6 or 7 and I felt like I was the only person who experienced that. That's why I couldn't tell anyone and lost confidence in myself
ruclips.net/video/TQGScRRALrA/видео.html This song is based on real life incidents. This song is to help raise awareness for those who can relate or have been through similar situations. raising awareness for Sexual abuse. Ptsd Survivors.
I didn't know I was assaulted for almost two years. I thought that's what sex was supposed to be like. I used to hate seeing his face and just felt so much resentment. I thought it was because he stopped talking to me afterwards, that I was bitter because I got played. I talked hypothetically to people about it and they said "if a girl puts herself in that situation she deserves what's coming". I wish I said something then because I can't stand to see his face anymore and I can't explain why.
Ladies, it is NEVER YOUR FAULT for being raped. It is the rapist's fault and ONLY the rapist's fault. I hope you all find the power to struggle through this. Thank you for the enlightening video.
A fitting poem I had written a while ago. Poetry always makes me feel less alone. So I hope it touches at least one person. Pigtails How do I word it? Well That's a hard one How does it make me feel? Boys say it made me fun I don't really know though When did my nightgown turn to lingerie Never speaking much of my adolescence It's all just a series of dark sad days I remember my long tangled pigtails I remember your strong demanding hand I remember my mother crying I just can't recall the details of this man Sometimes I fear that I'm lying to myself Most of the time I fear that I'm not Sometimes I think of how you said everyone does it Then I remember feeling ill when we were caught Everyone does it The pastor and his love Believing you were right gets harder everyday I don't think that he liked to shove They're all just moments however And it's too late for justice So I'll bite my fingernails Reciting your teachings of what love and lust is I hope you get what you deserve I can't speak up, justice always fails But oh how I cry when you look at those girls All those girls with their long tangled Pigtails
I've had experiences of sexual assault more than once.. After repressing for over a decade of abuse sustained by one person throughout my childhood, another instance happened with someone else as an adult and I didn't report it until 2 weeks later when I went to the doctor. My doctor told me I needed to report it, so I finally went to police about it. I met with an officer and talked to him for almost 2 hours. He then escorted me to the jail where I was supposed to talk with someone but the SGT told me I had to come back at a different time, so I did. They said I would be in a room, recorded, with two detectives and come to find out the room I was in was not recorded and I was being scrutinized for not reporting it sooner, putting myself in a one-on-one situation with someone, going back to that person after it happened (because I ended up finding out where he lived) and that I "seemed more distraught about the instances that happened to me growing up". I was told that "you have until you're 33 to report the childhood abuse" and that was it basically. I asked them what happens next and they said they would present it to another person to decide "if I have a case or not" and I never heard anything back from them and that was almost 5 years ago. I have respect for law enforcement, but women are so reluctant to report anything for all the reasons these women stated, and more.. But when you tell someone, regardless of age, race, gender, etc, that they basically have no grounds for reporting due to WHATEVER reason (in my case, since I was more upset about past history).. Where is the justice in that? I love every one, whether they share their story or not. Regardless if you share, report, or keep it in, YOU ARE STILL STRONG, YOU ARE STILL BRAVE, YOU ARE STILL BEAUTIFUL.
Oh for fucks sake people are still believing that men do not get raped... some people in this world are really dumb and ignorant. Stay strong, I wish you good luck in your life!!!
John Wie That must be hard for you especially when men and boys are held responsible because they 'should have been able to defend themselves'. That's so messed up.
John Wie My heart goes out to you. Yes, men can and *do* get raped, and I agree that a male version of this is a good idea--or at least have two male survivors of sexual assault in the video!
Liz Cruz,I'm SO sorry that happened to u. I know some people find it hard to get over the fact that someone just uncaringly abused their bodies without their permission. Remember it's always the perpetrator's fault because they lack self control. I hope u will be able to recover. My heart goes out to you
@@Galaxygoddessg They not always lavk self control! Oftentimes they want to do it! If they would only lack the self control but they would never want to hurt someone they wouldn't rape. If they had no empathy and a lack of self control they would still regret it the moment after. But often times it is just what they want! To hurt and destroy without considering the rights, feelings and boudaries of the other person.
Then your mother is a horrible person who isn't worthy of being your mother if she doesn't believe her own child. My heart truly goes out to you and don't blame yourself for what happened, it's the rapist fault for a lack of self control.
I never understood why women would decide not to report. I think now I do. I think now I understand. Thank you for coming out, being so brave and opening up.
Yeah, we usually don't cause no one believes us, it doesn't go far enough in court, or the rapist gets off twice, first time when they did it, second time when they aren't charged with the crime.
I was 7, this person was my so called cousin did it. I went to the basement where they slept and I layed next to him and then my pants were down and he put his private part on my thigh and slapped it around and he said “did you feel it” it felt wrong so I ran off into my room. I didnt tell anyone. I ended up telling my mom when I was 11 and all she said was “he’s stupid stay away” I told my dad this year and all he said was “HES STUPID” then left it at that. On June 16th there was this thing were south sudanese girls come out and tell their stories and I came out then my brother found out. My brother and I weren’t on speaking terms because he beat me up months before. He texted me “I saw your tweet go tell dad” I said “I already did but he didn’t do anything” Long story short we had a meeting today about it (I’m 14 now) and my dad came to this conclusion after I said I wanted to take legal action, I just had a meeting with my parents and my dad said that jail is horrible and people get killed for sexual assault and why would I want that. My dad believes in these spiritual things where (my sexual abusers dad is my uncle on my moms side) he has the power to curse us when he’s mad that his son got locked up and my dad said that that curse is gonna go to you and your siblings and your luck is going to be gone and so are your siblings luck (it passes down) and we’re able to die on the spot. They talked me out of not reporting it and plus my older brother said “what good is that going to do you?” So I can’t report it and I’m trying to train myself not feel like I need to report it. Their plan is to talk with his parents , I told my parents I don’t want to see his face at all. Ever. I just want to heal and become a more happier person, I’m probably considering therapy since my brother suggested that.
I was raped 2 years ago, by my son's father... I've only really just admitted to people and myself that it was real, everyone's so mad at me for not reporting it at the time... I had many reasons, firstly it truly means that it actually happened. Being in denial of the fact for a long time was how I coped. It meant that I could get through the day with minimal struggle. But like one of these women say, I just didn't see how reporting it and being forever marked as a liar would help my situation. I was in a relationship with him at the time (I left with my baby the next morning) it was blatantly clear to me that it wasn't worth the heartache. Plus the fact that even if I was believed, one day my little boy would grow up, and find out what his dad did to me. .... I'm kind of ranting here... I guess what I'm trying to say is that everybody deals with trauma differently. Every situation is different. And I had already lost control of my body. There was no way in hell, that I was gunna loose control of how I moved forward. I really needed to see this video today. All of these people are so brave, for telling their stories. It's nice to feel that actually I am justified. And I have no reason to feel guilty. Thank you.
It was after reporting an assault that I really began to blame myself- despite being a youth who was taken, by an adult (friend of a "friend")to a location I could not leave. Police ask some overly logical-sounding questions ("Why didn't you _____?" [fill in the blank]) which do not take into account the way a person in that situation is actually thinking ("This is NOT happening"; "I can make this stop, it's okay, I'll get this under control"; "I'm tough, I'll get through this..").
@@kirkclarke7396 I was a minor, with no money, late at night, in a not-great neighborhood just a little too far from home to walk. It was NOT where I'd been told we were going (Denny's); I'd gone with people I thought I knew. They lied to me several times- once I was already in the moving car, of course- about where we were going and what we were doing, then gave me the idea that other people would be there. (This was also a time way before everyone had cell phones; nobody I knew would have been up, by the time I realized what was going on, and almost nobody I knew could drive anyway.) ~ I WISH I'd been able to simply call a cab, as the adult me could easily do today. But even that was not an option for the teenaged me; walking home was not an option. Buses cost money, and those guys I was stuck with drove around wasting my time until the buses had stopped running anyway. Yes, I STILL know their names and yes, I did file a report. (What really made me mad, actually, was finding out later that the guy who assaulted me was a KNOWN molester and rapist of teens, and that a good friend's girlfriend knew but deliberately chose to say nothing.)..Two decades later, I had another friend who ran into that guy while they both were serving time in jail. And the man was there again for doing the same damn thing, twenty years later. yuck
@@erinthesystem9608 thanks for sharing, and I'm glad you filed a report. People like that should be locked up and have the key tossed away. Lying to get people to do something they don't want to do is quite normal, I lied to get a friend on a rollerrcoaster once - the black hole. Disrespecting a person's safety though is sick. I reckon she must have been paid cash or given something illegal to do that, but whatever the reason it was extremely selfish. Hope you have better friends now. Sadly you only know your real friends when you get older.
@@kirkclarke7396 The girl who said nothing to me chose to do so on her own, because SHE was friends w/him and he hadn't done anything to HER. Later she said to me, "I didn't think he'd do that to YOU." Like supposedly I was cool enough to be "off limits" somehow, or I was the "wrong type." ~ He was what he was: a predator, a low-life and really kind of a coward, totally unwilling to own his behavior. But she was a normal person (and supposedly this serious lesbian feminist) who CHOSE to roll the dice with MY life. That really bothered me. ~ A year later, I would even meet someone else- another guy- who knew about this man THROUGH other teen girls he'd assaulted or raped. So it also bothered me that he's obviously been hurting and frightening underage girls for SO damn long, in and out of jail (apparently), and isn't in prison where he clearly needs to be. Each case would be separate and look dubious/shaky on its own- and that's a problem, because seeing ALL of his prey in a single courtroom might look a little different. It's a pattern of behavior which WILL continue. ~ Thank you for your understanding! I reported him- and not a later assault- because in this case, it could have happened to ANYONE and I had absolutely NO way of knowing what was coming. I thought I was doing something normal and safe that I did all the time. To me, that is what made this person truly a predator upon innocent people. I told police not for me, but for other girls; I wish that anything had come of it.
That's totally fine as well. I didn't report and had my reasons. No one gets to tell us how we deal with this shit. Whichever way you decide to handle it, is completely fine. You've got this.
I was 7, this person was my so called cousin did it. I went to the basement where they slept and I layed next to him and then my pants were down and he put his private part on my thigh and slapped it around and he said “did you feel it” it felt wrong so I ran off into my room. I didnt tell anyone. I ended up telling my mom when I was 11 and all she said was “he’s stupid stay away” I told my dad this year and all he said was “HES STUPID” then left it at that. On June 16th there was this thing were south sudanese girls come out and tell their stories and I came out then my brother found out. My brother and I weren’t on speaking terms because he beat me up months before. He texted me “I saw your tweet go tell dad” I said “I already did but he didn’t do anything” Long story short we had a meeting today about it (I’m 14 now) and my dad came to this conclusion after I said I wanted to take legal action, I just had a meeting with my parents and my dad said that jail is horrible and people get killed for sexual assault and why would I want that. My dad believes in these spiritual things where (my sexual abusers dad is my uncle on my moms side) he has the power to curse us when he’s mad that his son got locked up and my dad said that that curse is gonna go to you and your siblings and your luck is going to be gone and so are your siblings luck (it passes down) and we’re able to die on the spot. They talked me out of not reporting it and plus my older brother said “what good is that going to do you?” So I can’t report it and I’m trying to train myself not feel like I need to report it. Their plan is to talk with his parents , I told my parents I don’t want to see his face at all. Ever. I just want to heal and become a more happier person, I’m probably considering therapy since my brother suggested that.
@@AlatOnDemand I'm sorry you're family didn't protect you. I would definitely recommend therapy. I was about your age when I was sexually assaulted for the first time and it still hurts me to this day (I'm 22) get help please.
i was 13 when I got sexually assaulted by one of my closest friends. I didn't tell anybody because I thought people would think I'm doing it for attention. it hurts a lot and I know how these women must feel.
I felt so betrayed bc everyone said that he was “too nice of a guy to do that” and a girl that claimed to be his best friend said he never messed with her. I was blamed for not going to the police on my campus. I had mixed feelings bc I thought I had liked the guy and we were flirting before his party and he took advantage of me before touching my chest. It didn’t click in my head that I was assaulted bc it was in disbelief that this could happen to me. It’s seems like every time we have these seminars about assault people are quick to say that it’s wrong and that they would stand up for the victim but then when it happens….crickets or blaming especially if it’s someone they knew that was involved
I was 14. He was my older brothers (my brother is three years older) best friend (who was older than him) sense I was seven. He didn't start doing questionable things until i was 14. One night he came into my room while I was asleep, locked my door, held me down, and did what he did. After he was done he told me no one would believe me, and that no one would care. Later that year I tried talking to my older brother about how his best friend would make comments or touch me inappropriately, but like he said my brother didn't believe me. It took me two years to tell someone what really happened. It took me two and a half years to tell my mother and she replied "why didn't you tell me, I didn't raise you to be weak like that". I think about that every day. My brother is still friends with him, but thankfully he lives in another state. It's been too long to do anything and sometimes I think that they are right. I'm weak for not saying anything when I should have. I may never get closure, but its not worth letting them walk away. please. speak up before its too late and they get the chance to do it to someone else.
I've never been raped but I have been harrassed and I regret not telling my teachers. The reason I didn't is because they never believe you and don't care. Another reason is because I was scared to be made fun of. One of my friends told me I was overreacting and he was just flirting. When I told my mom she also told me he was flirting and that I shouldn't fight back because he didn't actually hit me. She also often tells me I'm asking for it and I'm gonna get raped because of what I wear. I really wish I could be as strong as these wonderful ladies who have had it so much worse than me
Prissy LaRue I used to go to a church that I didn't want to go to from the beginning, and they made us wear knee length skirts thinking it's the true modest way to dress and to prevent us from getting sexually assaulted. Turns out I got assaulted by a youth member there regardless of what I was wearing.
The fact that your mom said that to you is really sad. Your not asking to be harassed or anything based on what you were. She should have been there for you and she wasn't. Some people tend to not care and don't take things seriously when people are looking for someone they trust until it's too late = translation: some people won't believe you, tell you your overreacting, just play along, and etc until they actually find out you were right the whole time.
Hey hun, nobody deserves that. It’s not ok for people to treat you like that. If anything happens again and your Mom says the same thing, feel free to contact the police. Even though you might not think it’s a big deal, it is. I’m not pressuring you, I know it can be hard, but please don’t hesitate to seek help if you need it. I support you xx
My abuser continued to threaten and gaslight me even after his admission of sexual assault , he said that I have ruined his life by reporting him to authorities and that i also made a “ mistake” ( can’t believe he said that SAing me was a mistake and an accident) he continued to play the victim and threatened to release our private conversations we had prior to the incident! I think it’s one of reasons i was so horrified to report him but thankfully I did the right thing by protecting myself and future victims . I’m on my way to heal now from the trauma even tho I still have nightmares of the incident and of him trying to kill me , the aftermath is just so difficult to deal with and my heart goes out to all victims out there .
Powerful women to me. I'm a survivor too, I didn't tell anyone until well after the event. Sadly it happened more than once. By someone I was with. Then when I told the police after getting away..."we have no historic evidence & too little finances to further investigations"
Hey there. I'm the blonde girl in this video, in the white shirt, and I work for a sexual abuse support group called A Voice for the Innocent. I just want you to know that you aren't alone, and if you ever need support, you can visit avfti.org. I'm really, really sorry that happened to you, and you have people in your corner.
@@kirkclarke7396 it takes on average seven actual attempts to leave an abuser. I left mine seven years ago, then he took our boys. So now it's still abuse to go through because I will not give up until I've freed the kids. Not all of us have enough money to go to a courtroom, if I did my kids & myself would finally be safe. They prevent you from leaving in so many ways, a large factor is financial abuse. That's still happening now to me via false accusations sent to benefit offices. Each time I prove them to be malicious attempts, but I still starve for months waiting
Hi, excellent video ty so much, I’m so sorry for all these women, I also am a survivor of child sexual abuse! I’m proud of these women for their bravery to share their stories, it’s a life long journey to cope with such drama!! Ty, Bob,
Hey Bob, first off, I'm sorry that happened to you as a child, I'm also a survivor. And you're absolutely right, it is a life long journey to cope, recover and heal. I suppose the real justice is when we show those who hurt us that we are made stronger and more resilient, despite their despicable actions. Hope all is well for you nowadays 😊
@@audreydoyle5268 hi Audrey, ty so much for your concern and your understanding, after this happened I went to a karate school and still go, the next person who try’s to abuse me will put themselves in heaven!! Ty, Bob,
Let me begin by saying that the act of rape on anyone, female OR male, is inappropriate. Let me state further that the act of violating a person’s physical body AND of one’s psyche without permission, is rape AND emotional rape, respectively, the latter of which is infringed on much more frequently and almost always without justice to the victim. The former violation is always accompanied with the later so a doubly traumatic event. While the later doesn’t include physical scars, in many cases the victim is mentally scarred for the rest of their life unless they go through the grueling process of therapy, and even then, there isn’t a complete eradication of the memory itself, but will help in coping with it much better. Don’t ever let anyone tell you that you are at fault for placing yourself in the position that enabled the crime to take place. Don’t let anyone ever tell you that you were in the wrong place at the wrong time. Don’t let anyone ever tell you that the way you were dressed was the reason for the crime taking place. These are all ways that uncaring insensitive individuals justify the crime perpetrated on you and is just plain wrong. While these heinous violations are unacceptable, the unfortunate torturous responsibility of reporting the act becomes the burden of the victim…talk about throwing salt on the wound. Until government decides to do the right thing, these violations will continue despite the claims. The statute of limitations, to some degree left up to the individual states, requires timely reporting of these acts. While this is unfair to the victim, there are reasons for which they exist. The time frames set are fairly reasonable, in many cases for years, and in some states, there aren’t any. Ironically, one of the greatest tenents of this country is the protection of the individual from false and unproveable accusation. In the current environment, this requires the already abused to be further victimized during the reporting phase of a traumatic even. The only way to bring about change in a way that protects the abused within the confines of our greatest laws is to follow the statutory reporting time frames. This also means that those who report these events need to have enough evidence to prove the event took place and is why it is so important to report the event within 24 hours while the evidence is still present and identifiable. The downside of reporting these events in excess of the statute of limitations is the very real possibility of being sued by the accused, especially if their reputations are damaged, and is why it is so important to report as soon as possible. The timely reporting is also vitally important as unreported incidents free the perpetrator to commit future crimes against other victims. To make matters worse, this opens up the very real possibility of previous victims being sued by future victims at the hands of the same perpetrator if the previous victim did not report the event. Timely reporting is really a win-win scenario in that it provides the immediate process of healing for the victim and deterrence for future would be victims. There are ways to provide a victim with a protective environment with which to report the event. Parents must cultivate an environment that is comfortable enough for a violated child to feel free enough to discuss the event with them. The local authorities must be accommodating and sensitive to the feelings and emotions of the victim, which includes police and educational systems. In addition, company Human Resources departments must provide much more appropriate responses to victims reporting these events than they have been. Unfortunately, these environments have been the main point of failure for victims on a level that is miserable at best and we have to serve them better. While this appears to address only underage victims it, emphasizes the importance of early reporting so they don’t live for years with the emotional damage that have irreparably harmed countless victims. For adult victims, local authorities and Human Resource departments are again the main source of failure in most cases. The National Sexual Assault Telephone Hotline 800.656.HOPE (4673) is a good initial “go-to” for reporting these events in addition to professional guidance. Again, time is of the essence and the hard rule of thumb is NOT TO WAIT! In addition to calling the hotline, file a police report and GET A COPY OF THE REPORT AND VERIFY YOUR STATEMENT. Challenge anything that is in error or misrepresented in the police report. In addition, document your perception of their attitude towards you if you are the victim during the reporting phase. If your state’s law allows it, record the event during the reporting phase so you have audio proof of the filing. We’d all like to believe that those who are in place to provide protections to us are impartial but sometimes that isn’t the case and you need to ensure you’re personal interests are protected from all sources of inappropriate behavior. If your state doesn’t allow audio recordings, demand a trusted family member and/or friend to accompany you during the process and have them physically document the event and their perceptions of the interviewer’s attitude. There are many attorneys who specialize in rape cases. It is recommend hiring one before this process begins to provide you with good additional professional guidance during the process. The key is to act as quickly as possible while the event is fresh in your mind. While our intent of not dealing with it may seem protective and “feel” like it’s in our best emotional interest, it is a double-edged sword in that degradation of memory of events and evidence evaporates quickly, turning short term discomfort into a long term debilitating unhappy existence. Surround yourself with family and friends during this difficult time in your life and remember, it is not your fault.
Emotional rape? lease use a different word. Psychologically messing with people's head is a bad thing, but leave rape out of it. The less this word is used wrongly, the better for all who are actually raped.
Thank you so much for this. I was assaulted a few days ago and reported it today. I called several rape hotlines and explained the situation to make sure I wasn’t making false claims and mainly because I didn’t think the police would believe me. They confirmed to me that it was assault. However, when talking to the detective, he tried to switch my words up and claimed that it was consensual when it wasn’t. He didn’t believe me. That made it more traumatizing and upsetting. I felt like it was my fault. The nurse had to convince me that it wasn’t my fault that this happened to me. It’s just hard. I still feel really guilty and like this could’ve somehow been prevented. EDIT: Grammar error
@@Angiebee. I'm so sorry this happened to you. While this process is painful, and because you reported it immediately, you've already begun the process of healing. You're courage will also save who knows how many would be future victims from this individual. You are "wounded" so surround yourself with supportive people who will tend and fend for you. Take time to heal...
I was raped when I was 10 by 3 guys,My brothers friend,My uncle and my friend.I recently opened a childline case and im getting therapy.Im currently turning 13.But I wouldn't change a thing!This all made me who I am today❤
I was sexually assaulted by a friend from church. The pastor him self came to offer me money to shut up a few weeks later am pregnant today am married and I have this beautiful little girl bit inside I cry every time I see this act reaccuring in my head
Hugs. Sssooo sorry. Tells teacher you trust or a counselor. Tell them to let you just talk to them so they can document it. Ask them to make you a doctors appointment so it can be verified medically. Do this if you don’t think one your parents will believe you. Also if you don’t want to go into foster care or have a safe family to go to. So sad. Hurts my heart so bad.
I was molested when I was eleven. I didn't tell anyone because at the time I didn't have a good relationship with anyone in my family and the person that molested me happened to be my mom's best friend. Because I didn't hold him accountable I had to keep seeing him and it ended up happening again when I was thirteen. I'm now fourteen and I still haven't told anyone because I have no proof and I fear that no one will believe me. I'm living with the pain of what happened to me and I've never had to fight harder than now to not give up hope that one day the pain will just go away. Stories like these help me more than anyone can understand so thank you for sharing your stories.
Maybe there is enough evidence to convict him. Best ask a female police officer what kind of evidence would be needed in order to win such a case. Maybe a discription of his ***** would be enough, or just that you can describe what happend so well. Also, maybe he has done the same to other girls. They might feel just like you. If they see that someone is fighting him it might encourage them to also fight. Please, at least ask a specialist if there is the chance of winning a case.
I'm female to male and 13,yesterday my mom's friend kept rubbing my leg,and groped me,and flirted with me...My mom won't tell anyone because there's no proof...
I AM SO GLAD THAT THESE WOMEN ARE ABLE TO SHARE WHAT HAPPENED IN A HEALTHY WAY AND GOD BLESS THEIR SOULS AND MAY HE PUNISH THOSE WHO HAVE COMMITED THESE SINS
When I came forward, none of my abusers faced any consequences, and I lost my entire family over it. While I don’t like not being believed or having to face consequences to things I didn’t do, I don’t regret it. I regretted it for a long time, but now I don’t. I feel empowered, like I had the integrity and bravery to speak the truth; the fact that people didn’t listen and silenced me is on them. As for my family, that’s hard, but I don’t want anything to do with people who treat me that way. I’d met really nice people now who do care about me, and treat me with loving respect. I’m better off than had I not spoken up and stayed in that horrible family. My story isn’t everyone’s story, but I felt like I should share it anyways. I definitely understand their feelings. It’s awful being told by these people who are supposed to keep you and society safe that you’re not telling the truth. I will say this though; if you muster up the courage to report, TAKE SOMEONE WITH YOU. You will have support, and more importantly, a witness if the person you’re reporting to talks down to you. I had that happen, and I wished someone could’ve been there for me.
This is exactly what's happening with me right now my mother is blaming me for everything and telling me not to tell anyone the man who sexually assaulted me and my sister when I was 12 is living with us 🙂
Not to discourage any survivor that wants to report, but I wish I never reported because the process of having to say "this happened to me" to unwilling listeners was more traumatic to me than the sexual abuse itself. Five years later, I still think about the lawyers that defended the abuser, the female detective that was sympathetic towards the abuser, the close friends that I thought I could trust not believe me.... I met my best friend in an Adult Sexual Assault Support group, and she and I often talk about reporting because she never reported but she wishes she did, and I reported and wished I never did because I was retraumatized.... The summary is there's unfortunately no right choice in reporting or not, it's up to you yourself on what you think is the best for you
2:12 Exactly what I thought I was in a school assembly and the schools biggest idiots were sitting behind me and this one kept trying to hug me and I kept shrugging it off because I didn’t want to face him and tell him to stop because I knew he wouldn’t listen so I sat like that for the first 10 minutes until a teacher caught him and made him stand next to her the whole time
I was too scared to report it. When I was bullied at junior school and reported that I was given detention for telling tales and mother told me it was my fault. So when I was attacked in the park, by a stranger, at age 12, I was too scared to tell, I figured I'd get detention for life.
I wasn't raped but i was touched in places a 15 year old girl didn't want to be touched! He wanted to take me somewhere private to "talk" luckily i fought him off and a guy knew i needed help stepped in. I was touched and i froze, i was scared. I stayed quiet. Who would believe me, he was in a higher class than me. Worst part is people who were my so called friends, watched and let it happen. All they said was "hes drunk let him do that! Look at the way you're dressed just let him." They thought it was okay because he was drunk and what i wore that day. Worst part is he said i asked for it and i wanted it. I cried for days and weeks! I would see him at school and he would smile at me. It was like i relived that night. It started with that smile. My ex bf didn't even care! When i texted him what had happened he was angry. The next day he didnt believe me. The first thing he asked, "what were you wearing at the party?" He brushed off what i had told him like if it was nothing. If i went with him who knows what could have happened to me! My current bf believes me and was so caring. He asks if its okay if can do that or even ask if its okay to put his arm around me. Idk if i consider myself a survivor but im happy i fought him off and got through all the pain. Men or women don't deserve to be touched in ways they don't want to be! Im sorry if have ever been through this and you are strong and brave.❤
In Canada, cops found a girl inconscient in the backseat of a cab while the driver was doing business on her. The driver got charged. At the trial the judge said : " there is nothing that tell us this girl didn't gave consent before passing out".
It's very painful when you're in the situation that you can't do something to protect yourselves. But, sometimes we still need to go on in our lives, yes it's hard but We need to continue living. We won't let those tragic happenings in our lives be the hindrance to live our life to the fullest. We are here in this world because we have purpose that we need to do.
I survived childhood rape by my Stepfather. He did it many times over a 4 year period. It was horrible. I fell into depression. I told my mom, teachers, family, and I wasn't believed. He was a deacon in our church, and he told people I lied because he was my step-dad, and I was mad that my mom, and dad were divorced, and was telling lies about him. Back then laws about child rape were almost nonexistent. I feel for everyone who has gone through the hell of rape.
I remember when I used to think that I would never recover rape... And here I am today, had ptsd after it and because he was my "boyfriend", it took me two months to understand what happened One year after, I dont know if I will be able to stay strong eternally, and to anyone getting through this, you are strong and beautiful, dont let someone rule over your life and think that it was your fault, because it never was 🖤
I hope you heal. Understand it was not your fault and break out that prison and burn it down never to return again. I’m sorry you were surrounded by people who weren’t there but I hope you are now. I hope they’re there for you and support you and I hope that one day, if it hasn’t already past, that you will be more than okay. That you’ll be able to move on
@@boitshekomyataza8113 You think you are righteous... Women falsely accuse men of rape to receive sympathy. What evidence is there she is telling the truth? I encourage victims to talk to the police, if that makes you mad I don't care
I'm meeting with my counselor and a detective at 10am this morning. I'm making my report. It took almost 5 months for me to feel ready but honestly I don't think I'll ever feel ready. I'm terrified. I'm ashamed. I blame myself at times. Each moment I become stronger. The pain of going through it again by telling my story is near unbearable. I carry so much blame until I tell myself the story in my head as if I wasn't the main character. I get one short paragraph into the book and the anger boils over. I feel numb and my thoughts shut down. What made him do it? Hunger for power over a war he knew he would win. He brought a gun to the knife fight and I was caught in the crossfire. He is angry at women from a past of hurt or rejection and I felt the flames of the fire that he started in his own head. He not only lacked concern for my well-being but completely disregarded my physical and vocal statements opposing his sexual advances. The only thing I deserved that night was a big glass of water and a blanket. Instead, I was grabbed at in the hallway after I used the restroom and sexually abused by two much older men who I naively thought were just two goofballs from the bar. I was in denial. I tried to pretend like it was a dumb drunk night and thought I'd forget about it in a day or two. I didn't. My memory was flashing vividly of scenes I tried convincing myself weren't real. He helped himself to aggressively touching me in the hallway which I undoubtedly resisted. I got to the bed and layed down near the other man I expected to show me respect while I slept soundly. I never imagined the loss of humanity and humiliation I'd be haunted with. I woke up to my pants being pulled off. I was near unconscious. I had no strength or energy. I thought the other man would stop it. I opened my eyes and he was looking right at me when he began touching my whole body. One man was behind me, inside me, and thrusting quickly as tried to grab the sheets and pull myself away. I found the energy to say no, I don't want to, and stop. My tired and watery eyes begged the other man to help. He seemed almost as uncomfortable as I was at first but it didn't take long for him to start pleasuring himself while he eased into the disgusting crime. Two penises penetrated me. Four hands rubbed all over my body. The memory I have of that night is scattered but the scenes I relive are vivid. It is undeniable that a crime not only occurred but was perfectly executed by two men that someone calls their dad, uncle, neighbor, or close family friend. I'm well aware that I may not get justice by law, but I feel justice by telling the story of the crime I never thought could happen to me.
I was told that, I wanted it anyways. That, it’s not big of a deal. Why am I telling it to them, it’s not important. It’s not that traumatizing. I don’t respect myself that’s why it happened to me. And that if I report it, it’s too late. It happened now, so what, just move on. I thought to myself that if I reported it, I will lose everyone that I care for deeply and love deeply... Because it was them who assaulted me. I felt so worthless and undeserving of the love I crave all my life. I felt the same as the girl that says “I didn’t think I was worthy enough to draw boundaries what people can and can’t do with my body.” I became afraid because I know for a fact that people will belittle the trauma again and will tell me again that it’s not that big of a deal and that there is nothing that I can do anymore. All my life, I always thought that it was my fault.
I was not assaulted, but I received inappropriate comments and some actions that I never told anyone. One main reason is because some people involved are part of our family and ofc, I feel like it is my weakness now. I can't imagine the pain of these victims and the courage they earned to be able to talk about their experience.
It happened when I was 8, I didn’t say anything until I was 12, nothing happened until I was 14. When something did happen my mom said she didn’t believe me.
Today somebody made me so uncomfortable. This 64 year old dude said some creepy stuff to me (I’m 17) and he was being very invasive of my space, randomly hugging me when I do not know the guy nor did I in any way say it’s cool to hug me. I’m so distraught cause I’ve been through sexual abuse in the past and I thought I was better at saying “no” but I just froze and I feel awful. I feel really pathetic. It might’ve just been a hug today but it made me feel so weak and embarrassed. I can’t stop feeling gross. I feel safe putting all this information here. And I don’t really have anyone to tell so
I didn't report because he was my boyfriend who dragged me into the corn field. He said he was sorry but that I led him on earlier that day. He said he loved me. I believed him. I was 21 and it's been eight years since it happened.
Same happened to me, I was bullied in college had no friends ,nobody to talk to, I told my parents I don't want to go that college right after first year they didn't listen as a result I kept going to my abusive ex who molested me multiple times, he molested me when we had broken up, he molested me in an elevator, then once he forced my in his house
I did report. Then I was "advised" that his family was important and I was not. That it would be this son of a well-thought-of-family's word against mine. This was told to me by the police officer in charge of my case on the night after being raped. I dropped it. And I have always felt such anger, betrayal, and shame.
This is heartbreaking. I'm so ashamed Women have to go to through this by perverted men. No, It's not okay. As for the ladies keep silent I don't blame them. That's a hard thing to go through. Females shouldn't have to suffer over men who are perverts and have a problem. Don't stay in silence. You're not responsible for someone else's actions.
It was my partner at the time. He had already been extremely physically abusive by then but one night when he was drunk was when it happened. I said no and fought, threatened to call the cops and he responded by breaking my face. I had to walk around with a gnarly ass black eye and bloody eyeball for weeks and I just knew people were looking at me the same way people look at stray dogs. I did report it but they said it would be hard to prove the rape, the only proof I had was my black eye and pictures over the years of my bruises from the abuse. But they said even that would be hard to prove because he was my partner. So I didn't... Because that was when I knew I would lose. My best option was to do what I could to move forward. That's all we can do guys... Report it. Do what you need to to get by. But move forward. We aren't alone, that little bit of knowledge knowing I wasn't the only one who was not only hurt but also discouraged to speak up. They can't keep us all quiet though.
I'm planning on telling my mom this week about what my dad and brother did to me, but I'm scared no one will believe and I have no proof so court won't believe anything. I just don't want to face them again.
You don't have to feel anything that doesn't feel authentic to you. After it happens, you kind of go through a grieving process. Shock and being unable to understand your feelings about it is part of the process. I hope you heal from your awful experience 💖
I didn’t either. I didn’t realize the extent of how horrible it was until I saw the reaction of my friends and doctors. I mean but I guess I knew, I was just in denial about it because I didn’t want to admit that I had seriously been sexually assaulted. Just saying it to myself mad me sob and feel a lot of unpleasant feelings.
I was 7 and I was raped by my cousins - 2 siblings. An older girl cousin and an older boy cousin. I was absolutely mentally and emotionally devastated.... I was being violated for YEARS BEFORE AND I WAS GROOMED and set up for this disgusting pieces of shits. I WAS ABSOLUTELY SET UP FOR THE ABUSE, FOR THE DAILY SEXUAL AND PHYSICAL VIOLATIONS.... this is why I don't trust any of my relatives.... MY MOTHER , FATHER, grandmothers and grandfathers and aunts and uncles and cousins set me up for that.... Or what they said or did ... To me.... For me..... THIS is why I don't trust or believe in or care about anybody but myself.....
Recently met with an accident & got assaulted by a doc in the name of Medical examination He knew nicely what he was doing & continued with it His wife called & threatened to ruin my life & Here I am Every single day angry,resentful of myself,hating my body,hating how I let this all happen 💔 Thank U for this I really needed to listen to all this to know I am not alone
I really wanna spit on the face of his so called wife, the people who support the rapists are equally responsible. Shame on them. Don't blame yourself, ok hun? You are strong, so strong. I am so proud of you!
@lonely wolf I told to 2 of my friends and none of them even questioned if I was lying. I don't and neither do u need to keep it as a secret or be ashamed! Maybe no one believed u, but I do believe u. Stay strong and as positivite as possible. U are not alone, and again, remember: they didn't believed u but someone will.
When I was nine my sister wanted me to have a sleepover with her. I thought she wanted to finally be nice to me after all the years she hurt me and called me names and never told me she even liked me or wanted me as a sister. I was wrong. While I was changing into my pyjamas and my sister told me we had to go to bed at that second. At first I wanted to sleep on the floor then she said she didn’t mind if I slept in her bed. I was only wearing my pyjama shirt since she told me I had to go to bed. She reach under me and pulled down everything I had left on except my shirt and started touching me. I didn’t say anything for the whole time, I was scared of her. Still am. It lasted til 9:30pm-11pm (about) until she finally went to sleep but she was still touching me while in her sleep. I reached over to get her arm out from me and I slept on the floor for a few hours until I felt so disgusting that I went to my room and said that I just woke up earlier than her. I didn’t tell anyone, I haven’t told anyone in my family or really much anyone at all. I feel like she would hit me, hurt me, insult me, lie about me, and say that I was lying. I tried telling someone when I thought she wasn’t around. She grabbed me away and said “That was in the past, don’t think about it anymore. The past doesn’t matter and so do you. That never happened. You’re making things up. Why would you lie? Are you insane?” I had many more reasons why I didn’t tell people other than she would hurt me mentally and or physically. I thought she would get in trouble and she was still my sister so I never told anyone. I thought no one would believe me. I thought it didn’t count since I’ve been told ‘you can’t get raped by girls,’. I thought she would cry, I don’t want her to cry. I thought I would ruin her life, I don’t want to ruin her life. I thought I could’ve made the whole thing up (which I didn’t, I still have proof of that night). And I thought I was delusional. I hated myself, couldn’t bring myself to talk about anything even slightly touching the subject of sex. I couldn’t sleep at night since the events replayed in my mind and I passed out on the bus. I missed my stops many times and my parents had to come pick me up. They thought I wasn’t getting the right nutrients but then my mom asked me if I was depressed. Even though I was, I couldn’t tell her. I felt guilty about it. I was always taught to smile, be perfect. I wasn’t that anymore. I countered other forms of SA before the age of nine but this was rape. It shattered me and my mental health. I couldn’t eat properly. Too much or too little. I couldn’t sleep right, too much or too little. And flashbacks would reoccurring-ly happen and I would hide myself in the bathroom. I know I have depression, not any other type of mental illness, haven’t been diagnosed so I won’t self diagnose. But I wish my eldest sister listened when I told her I needed her help. No one listened to me. And no one ever will.
I think some people threaten or blackmail you into not reporting it. Also, there are some people that are of a higher ranking so the victim doesn't think that people will believe her.
I reported it. I's so hard. You have to be strong and gain that power back. Rape cases are a long process. Mines been nearly 18 monthes and finally getting to the hardest part. Facing the man. Through the investigation process I have been homeless , in and out of shelters and havn't seen home for over a year. People say move to another town. Why the hec should I.? As my case is drawing to hoping a closure I want to see justice, Not just for me but for other victims and like the ones I saw speaking on the vid and people commenting. So I say is it worthwhile reporting rape ? it's hard to say at the moment because I feel scared and lonely. Rape is where the Victim becomes the accused. The justice system has to change so it's easier to face the accuser , and I believe it is getting easier . I got an IVO first and I was in a totally different location where my accused was. I cried because of memories but I had support and it was informal rather than a huge court stand. Now I just got to face this hurdle. It scares me to think will he go free ? I am a survivior of rape and now a Voice for Women and Men (Yes it happens to men too) Love to all victims
No offense to all victims of sexual abuse but why would you not report it? It's like someone punching me and I'm too scared to hit back. All I'm saying is put your fear to the side. YOU ARE STRONG,BEAUTIFUL,AND POWERFUL. Remember that.
Because most people don't want to go to the police, be traumatized by their investigation, forced to retell the story over and over with as much detail as possible, do it all again in court while his lawyer keeps talking about how you consented and enjoyed it, and statistically less than 1%, let me say that again LESS THAN 1%!!! Of these cases will result in any form of punishment. It's füçkêd
My experience was more insidious as opposed to straightforward, which leaves me with grief about the events, yet no proof. I still remember the lustful eyes and smirk on his face. It's like I was a thing and not a person. It's very scary when someone truly doesn't care about how their actions impact you. You lose so much of yourself that you figure, "what's the point of resisting now?"
The person who sexually assaulted me repeatedly was my former stepbrother and he was 4 years older than me and I was a kid when it when it started. I know he was double digits, but can’t really remember exactly what our ages were. I was worried if I told, it would break up our blended family. My father ended up divorcing his mother when I was about 13 because of their relationship breaking down. I finally told when I was 17, after a suicide attempt. It had to be reported to social services and the police because I was still a minor. I had my mother talk to both on the phone. The police asked my mother to ask me if I wanted to press charges and I said no. There was obviously no physical evidence left years later, so it would have been just my word against his. I didn’t want to go through a trial when he probably would have gotten off. I know I wasn’t his only victim, because social services already had a file open on him. Sometimes I wonder if I had said something when it was happening, would their have been other victims?
I don't understand. If someone Rapes you, or assaults you in any way REPORT IT! (I can understand the girl and the drugs, she could be charged with getting involved with illegal substances.) It doesn't matter if it is, "Your word against his". They have rape kits to sense trauma, female and professional Officers would will be there to listen to your story. Anything you need, fight until the very end! What frustrates me the most is when victim reports it months, or years later. The longer you wait, the less likely your story will sound believable. If anything if you DON'T report it you ARE at fault because, you're technically saying YOU ALLOWED it to happen. If you don't report it, that monster is still walking around and can do it to someone else! .... Feel really bad for the girl with the drugs though.
Wish I didn't report mine...... ended up being charred with soliciting. It killed me.. he was in the court room too i lost it... infront of alot fo people before a judge who read out the charge. I felt like it was happining all over again, he was laughing the whole time... all I heard was why did you do this there were ways out.. it was your fault you wanted it...
I know something is wrong with this world or maybe me when two of these stories are almost spot on with two of my stories. These girls are strong and I understand 100% the fear of pressing charges and doubting yourself and being seen as a victim by everyone else
I was sexually assaulted as well, and it brings tears to my eyes that they feel like they are not important, but im here to say that everyone is important, no matter who you are❤ it hurts to see this still happening! Its fucken 2019, and i would think we have learned not to rape or sexually assault someone in any way wether it be a male or female!
I did reported him, tomorrow I have to stay in a court room and tell my story in front of him and so many more people. Pray for me, please 🤲
How did it go? xx
Hey hun, I hope you got your justice. Nobody deserves to be assaulted.
Be careful another time ;-;
Wish you the best
Are you stupid!!! Of course she won.... she is a woman
@@Snella-UB no realistically she could've lost
" I didn't know that I was important enough to draw boundaries around what people could and couldn't do with my body" That line was so sad it took me form 0 to tears in an instant.
I balled at that point.
Oh my she broke me so bad here!!!! So brave !!!!
Yap, low self-esteem is huge in these cases. I knew of one girl who only reported her dad's assaults once he started assaulting her sister as well. She felt that it didn't' matter if he was molesting her as she was "nobody", but when it happened to her sister, she had to defend her.
My daughter felt the same. She said she went to her classmate room for drink and she said that even before tthe incident he was manipulating her she dismissed everything and she thought she could defend herself if he would do inappropriately to her while drinking. She said she had thus urge to drink with boys alone since she was shy to go to pubs. She said she can tolerate some things from boys even though she didnt like them.but after the rape she understood wholly how sacred her body is .. And after 2yrs broke to us that she was raped. I couldn't help her, i simply asked why you didnt tell this before. She said it wont be any use...she just thought that she pretended that it never happened and go on wit her life. She also said that she forgave her rapist the next day itself but in reality she is burning like hell. If ther would be no law i coukd have god knows what would i do to him. She is struggling and i am unable to see her like this. We don't want to report this.. I am just praying to god for her justice .
ra1981 p why are you sharing your daughters story
My mom was raped by her doctor... She even had his DNA on her clothes. It took her 2-3 years to actually make it a case. But somehow the judge believes the doctor and thought they both wanted it and it looked bad she waited so long. But I don't blame her! It was scary to even come forward finally. She ended up losing the case... So fucked up how it works out. I'm sure money played a part in it since he was hella rich too. My family stopped me from going into his building and busting his face in with a mental pipe.
I found you here :)
I would've snapped right then and there
@JP S why not tell asap cause geez so it doesnt happen again,others are safe and cause disgusting creatures like that deserve to he locked up and rot
@@electricityisgreat2767 It's actually concerning that still many sexual assault victims are too scared to report. The social stigma plays a part in that too
I was molested by my doctor when I was a very young child. I’m so sorry this happened to your mother.
I never thought in my life that i would be that girl who finds a video about sexual assault so easy to relate to . i never thought this would be my life
Did you also have these pathetic excuses?
Same
Same
I know exactly how it feels like
@@kirkclarke7396 you mean very reasonable excuses?
Out of one of the 3 times I was raped, I decided to report it. I was drugged and unconscious when he raped me. A blood test showed the drugs in my system. And yet the detective I spoke to slut-shamed me so much that I ended up dropping the charges. I can honestly say that my experience with the Police felt more traumatizing than waking up the next morning naked and vomiting because what he drugged me with made me really sick. I want to say that you should always report it, but I know I would never do it again if the same situation were ever to arise. Sometimes there just is no justice to be had.
Kasha A I'm sorry you went through that, but do you understand why they ask the questions "did you egg him on", "did you get drunk" etc is because it's such a serious crime on both ends. While tou hve to deal with aftermath personally, the police have to deal with the law which give them no leeway on how to operate. Not only that but they don't want to go court with little evidence because it wastes money. Since rape is hard to prove in court because there almost always little to no evidence backing up the claim. What you see as slut shaming, literally might just have been normal police procedure, not only that but imagine how many times that single police officer had a similar story told to him. It becomes numbing, overwhelming, irritating and deppressiong. Now I understand you might say "it is about me I was raped" while that's true your not the center of the universe the process is extremely complex, with more factors being apart of the outcome then you can possible immagion. Sorry though you had to go through suchba trumitizing experience.
@@Paragons_Delight - "What you see as slut shaming, literally might just have been normal police procedure, " --- Or it was slut-shaming. The police have a far larger, provable history of that than, oh, it was just procedure. Netflix just released a movie very similar to Kasha's story. A woman was raped and shamed into rescinding her story. And a serial rapist was never pursued until 3 years, and 5 rapes later. That happened in 2008, the 21st century, not decades ago. For someone who is "sorry" she had to go through this, you basically told her what she had to say and what she felt was worthless. Next time, if you have nothing positive to contribute in such a situation, don't say anything at all.
@@Paragons_Delight By the way that you're defending the cops, I'm going to assume that you're either a male, a cop, or someone who has never been raped before. Because what you're saying is BS.
I hope you reported that officer for being unprofessional.
They didn’t believe me either
I didn't report it because I felt it was partially my fault, I had no proof, I wanted to pretend it didn't happen & the police probably wouldn't believe me. A year & 1/2 later. I'm trying my hardest to heal
aww im sorry. i hope youre getting help
Taylor Chantae I've been going the self help route. With faith, prayer & trying to give it all to God. If it wasn't for that, I don't know what I would've done. Still going one day at a time. Learning how to trust guys again.
sweetncool oh thats so sad yeah it must be hard
I am with you girl i am literally in the same situation
Same ❤️❤️
We need to teach our daughters and sons that it is never their fault.
No we don't. That will lead them to take no responsibility for their safety.
@@kirkclarke7396 If you didn't exist, then they would feel a lot safer
@@MrSoumyaBanerjee
If I didn't exist the percentage of rapists per 100,000 people would be higher, and so would the number of rapes.
You clearly disagree with my opinion. So do you recommend replacing the 'say no to strangers' signs at schools with signs that read 'stay away strangers' then because it makes kids feel safer if they don't have to do anything?
Children might feel safer if they don't learn about dangers and how to deal with them, but really do you honestly think we should simply not bother to teach them how to be safe just so they "feel safer" ?
If a paedophile lures your child into his car, are you saying you wouldnt blame the child at all??? I would say 'what did I tell you about strangers?' so they dont make the mistake again. But you seem to think it is better saying something like 'it wasn't your fault you didn't listen, the stranger is entirely to blame.'
If the child didnt know of the dangers, then I'd say the child is not to blame in any way. Unfortunately feminists realise this, that's why you will hear them chant 'don't teach us how not to get raped'.
@@kirkclarke7396 Listen kiddo, there is a difference between a cause and effect relationship and moral burden . If a kid doesn't get into a car with a pedo then obviously they would be keeping themselves safer (although the same holds true for the pedophile and to a much greater extent, since many, if not most, sexual predators prey on multiple people). But the kid absolutely has no moral burden to bear. Why don't we teach more men to explore their sexuality in a more healthy manner? That too bears a cause and effect relationship with the issue. And I'm a man btw let me tell you that I have met many of your ilk. Most of them got jailed eventually. People who nourish an environment which makes sexual assault difficult to prosecute and worsens the mental health of survivors are no better than rapists in my eyes.
@@MrSoumyaBanerjee I know the difference but are you seriously using that example to explain the difference? Kids cannot choose not to be kidnapped! If they know to say 'no' to strangers it makes it more difficult for the paedo because paedos have to force the child into their car (which I doubt would be a problem) however by forcing the child to enter, the child will resist via screaming etc and alert others and thus probably get away without being harmed. If the child believes there are no strangers about because the signs work, the child will be kidnapped. Cause and effect. You don't seem to understand personal safety, not many do, but there are many things people can do to reduce their risks. If you follow one piece of advice and ignore the rest just to feel safe, you won't be safe. Plenty of women say they covered up but still got raped. The fact they were drunk, alone etc and not taking personal safety seriously doesn't seem to be a factor for them despite such advice being given by police. Here is an example of cause and effect: girl doesn't take responsibility for her personal safety, she gets attacked. Here is another: boy smokes, and eventually develops lung cancer. Unfortunately we live in a world with bad people. I am not one of those, the fact you know people who have been to prison doesn't support your argument, plus you only know a tiny fraction of people, so judging me on your personal experience is stupid. Everybody is different.
Also, crimes against children like rape and kidnap barely have anything to do with sex, it is about violance. Shows how little you know.
The people responsible for nourishing an environment where crime flourishes are those who tell people not to take personal safety seriously eg feminists who say 'don't teach us how not to be raped, teach men not to rape' and people who claim victims are totally blameless. It doesn't make people responsible, when asked why didnt you come forward sooner so others didn't get raped, they say its unfair to put that responsibility on me, the rapist should come forward. Women are getting raped multiple times because they are taught at a young age they are not responsible for anything bad that happens to them. Nobody can control other people, I'm not saying this, I'm saying people can take responsibility for their own safety and for others. If you think there is nothing victims can do since victims are blameless they will be weak, and rapists prey on the weak.
as someone who was assaulted and did report it then to be told asked: "did I lean him on? did I ask for it? did I regret it? Are you sure you didn't want it? are you sure it was rape?" then for the case to be thrown out because the bruises and marks weren't enough and that my story didn't match with his. I find myself wishing I didn't report it. that I should have just been quiet, no one would have came to my house and told me I was bitch for making stuff up or that I was lying for attention. the justice system messes up even if you case gets there or not.
I Will Be King I am so fucking sorry. my heart broke reading this. I pray for your healing ❤️ you are more than what happened to you. sending love your way
I Will Be King i had the same thing happen to me. he had his girlfriend call me and tell me if i didnt stop telling people what happened she would finish what he had started and kill me. the police do absolutely nothing and even when they can go to court the defense rips you apart by making you look promiscuous ect. and if you survive through that he will face minimal jail time.
I just want to give you a giant hug. I'm so sorry that happened to you. How dare his girlfriend say that to you, much less stick by him when she clearly knew what he had done?? You deserve so much better and I wish I could help you somehow. Just know you are loved and supported, even from far away, ok? :-)
this is so fucking disgusting. you deserve respect omg
I’m so sorry our justice system failed you. I don’t even know you, but I believe you x
The fear of being judged, criticized and not believed is soo scary it's nauseating.
Right
"And I blamed myself for putting myself in that situation." This is relatable to literally all the girls / woman out there. The girls are taught to feel the guilt for the things they didn't even do. It has become the tradition in the society and it's fucking depressing.
i really liked this video and the message is sadly so true I'm a survivor too so this really reflected my story in many ways
Hi Hannah, my name is Kristen and I'm one of the women in this video. I'm so terribly sorry that happened to you; please know you are not alone! If you ever need to talk you can visit Avfti.org, where survivors share their stories and get support.
Here for you girl. Xoxo
Kristen Eby I m one too it's like to kill myself
Hey there. Please know you're worth it. You're a whole, strong, beautiful person, and nothing someone else did to you can take that away. Please visit avfti.org for support, we're on your side, and you got this.
It's so crazy to see in this comment section how many people are victims. Being one myself and seeing how many more of you guys there are astonishes me. This world is disgusting.
I am so so sorry that happened to you 💕 I pray and wish and hope that person gets sent to jail 💕 wishing you the best, and please get therapy if you think that you need therapy, if not I hope you find a way to slowly, but surely, heal. If dwelling on it makes you feel worse, maybe try finding a new hobby or something that makes you forget, as much as you can, about this terrible and traumatising thing. You are a queen, and instead of possibly faulting yourself, recognize that it is NOT your fault and constantly, constantly remind yourself that you are strong and amazing and an incredible person. As a precaution, maybe you may want to take up self defense? I wish and pray that this never happens to you again and that it never happens to anybody else. I hope and wish and pray that whoever did that to you and other survivors and victims of rape dies a slow, terrible death and rots in Hell.
Im sad because I reported the man who sexually assaulted me and he didnt go to jail. He got away with it.
I dont know what to do, I'm suffering from what he has done to me. Hes carrying on as if nothing has happened.
I cant stop crying. He ruined me. He ruined my life. He took my body .
Everything is going down hill. I'm failing all my classes, I lost my job all from depression and PTSD experienced by all of this. I hate the monster who did this to me.
I was more hurt by the smile and him laughing when he was told hes not guilty. He looked right at me and once again too power over me. Hes living his life happy he got away with sexually assaulting me.
I will never be the same person again
I went through the same thing. Seeing the guy who assaulted me smile in my face and ridicule me for what happened made me absolutely sick. I was angry, embarrassed and completely ashamed. I pray you'll have a turnaround soon. It's so hard to fight through everyday, especially at work.
@@nelodypond9282 I'm sorry it did happen to you as well. i hope these bastards lives turn out so shiity. i pray the same for you. it is hard and its not fair. I hate it when criminals get a way with crimes they have committed.
I try to take it day by day but my biological father always bring it and blames me for it constantly.
@@idfcagainidfc25 this whole thing took place in Canada. its not an islamic country but the law still failed me and many other women.
I am so sorry . I had went . I am sorry.
He may act happy to hurt you but deep down he must know what he did was wrong and that everyone hates him.
I didn’t move, I just froze I smiled and pretended I wanted it, so I told myself after ‘it wasn’t rape’ ‘I was in control’ ‘I wanted it’. I couldn’t believe it was happening, I didn’t want people to think of me as ‘weak’.
are you ever going to report it
Xenon Blaster so I experience the harsh reality of victim blaming people saying ‘why didn’t you say no or fight back’. People choosing sides of the truth they want to believe. I can’t. I’m not strong enough
@@xenonblaster9240 Stop asking shit like that jesus christ
@@amyjones6329 if you smiled and pretended that you wanted it, then how on Gods good earth would he have known that you didnt want it?
@@dapper_slapper4093 Ever think maybe they initially kept saying “no” but he continued anyway so they just gave in?? Stop blaming the victim
thank you ladies for your stories. it's so hard to admit to yourself that you've been victimized, it's so hard to tell your family. it's so hard to live that moment all over again. it's hard to talk about it. thank you I'm not alone.
But not one single Dems spoke up about fake rape by supreme Court nominee,Dems cld care less about sexual assault,they lie about it and you ppl cheer, Hillary called women liars bill Clinton raped,Dems laugh about rape and the disgusting leftist say nothing,they make rape a joke,and make fun of Monica Lewinsky and harass REAL RAPE victims,Dems are truly sick mentally ill ppl to use rape for politics,but you say nothing
@@chizzelfingers that's not what this video is about? also your grammar made it painful to try to figure out what you wanted to say. i'm still not very sure
@@chizzelfingers that is not what this video is about, and also, have you heard the things Republicans have said about rape.
“Rape is kinda like the weather. If it’s inevitable, relax and enjoy it.”
“If it’s a legitimate rape, the female body has ways to shut that thing down.”
“Rape victims should make the best of a bad situation.”
“In the emergency room they have what’s called rape kits, where a woman can get cleaned out.”
“If not for incest and rape ‘would there be any population left?”
Republicans say just as vile things.
all of these women are so brave coming forward with there stories and im really sorry that happened to them this took alot of courage. its a shame the world we live in and how difficult it must be
47Cartoonguy their brave NOW. But alot of them got into the situations they were in because they lacked self worth. If they said "NO, I do have value and I will not be violated this way" it would be a whole different story.
Shuuuuut uuuuppppp
@@spac3dandy206 STFU! There are women & yes men, sexually attacked from babies to senior citizens! Every race, religion, and socioeconomic background. No one wants to be prey to predators, or betrayed by someone they love, or trusted.
Never sit too high and mighty in what you think you are, or what you're about because-many survivors did absolutely NOTHING wrong. Never pass judgement on a survivor, or their pain.
@@spac3dandy206 I think you need to look up the definition of rape.
It's when sex is FORCED upon someone. Whether it be that they were unconscious, drugged, or literally physically forced it means they couldn't have done anything but fight harder.
It's the rapist fault not the fucking victim you sicko.
How do you know they are telling the truth
I read somewhere that telling someone that "They should be more careful what they're wearing and how they are acting" Basically means: "Make sure he rapes someone else, not you." And that hit me so hard...
I'm a great example of being the someone else that was raped. It was either me or another girl who was with us. I'm glad she went home first, so I know she was safe. I knew his intentions too. Give someone the chance to take advantage of someone, and if plan a doesn't work out, they just hope for plan b, till they get lucky.
@@audreydoyle5268 i agree. Im sorry that happened to you. I have a similar story. So i get it. Just remember you are strong and you're gonna get through this. If you ever need anything feel free to message me and I'll try my best to help. I know it's easier to talk to people that understand what you've been through. Hang on and i hope life treats you well.
I am also a survivor. I was sexually assaulted when I was only 14 years old. I was a Freshman in high school and this boy, his name was Judson, he was assigned to the seat behind me in class. For the first few months everything was okay. Then, one day he decided to reach through the hole in the back of my chair and touch me. Nobody in the seats around me noticed. He then continued to do it every day for weeks on end. It was usually after school while I waited for Color Guard rehearsal to start at 3:30. I was in the sitting are on the second floor above the main commons and my then boyfriend Brendan was there and we were just talking. About 10 minutes later Judson come up to me and manages to convince me to play a game with him on his phone. So, we were just talking and playing the game until sudden;y he reaches over and puts his hand down my pants. I froze and just tried to get away but then he grabbed me and made me sit in his lap. He was hard and I could feel it. I tried to leave several times but he was stronger than me and held me back. He then proceeded to reach around and put his hand on my chest. By this point I was fighting and trying to get out of there but he pulled me back by my arm and turned around and pulled my hand towards his pants and made me touch him. I was horrified. What made it worse was the fact that Brendan was there and didn't do a thing. This is the first time I've ever shared my story and I haven't even told my parents yet because I'm scared they will be disgusted and blame me for not doing anything and not love me anymore. I know I need to tell them but I just don't know how. I am now newly turned 15 years old and I get nightmares about him and I was diagnosed with PTSD. I have made suicide attempts in the past. I don't know what to do anymore. I have already been to a hospital 4 times. What should I do? How do I tell my parents about Judson?
Really sorry for your ordeal
Since this was two years ago, you’re around my age, and that really hurts to know that this happened to you. I am so sorry. I can’t say I know what you’re going through, but I know you were genuinely seeking advice when you wrote this. I don’t know if you’ve already told your parents about this by now, but maybe you could show them this comment specifically? I feel like it captures a lot of the situation, and maybe having it in writing for them will make your story more coherent for them to understand. Coming to them and honestly telling them you don’t know how to approach the matter may be good too. No one really *knows* how to deal with this, so it’d be be good to start off with that if you decide to talk to them. If not done in this way, I hope you decide to confront the situation in the best possible manner for you. I hope you’re able to heal from this, and I’ll be praying for you. Also, I hope Judson faces real consequences for what he did to you. It is completely unacceptable, horrible, and wrong for people to take away someone’s autonomy like that, and I’m so sorry that this happened to you. Please know that this event in your life is not who you are, and I hope you come to know and feel that your life is still a one worth living. God bless you, truly. And please punch Judson in the gut, God.
You should tell your parents, what happen to you. Have a meeting with your parents. You can also have other trusted adult in the meeting. Another family member or counselor to be at the meeting. Picked a date, when you, your parents, and someone else, that you can trust. That everyone free from busy schedule. Explained to your parents what happen to you in the pass. If you’ve a counselor. The counselor can help out. Since the counselor is trained in this type situations. Hopefully your parents will be supportive of what happen to you in the pass.
How she said, "I could tell that something that I hadn't wanted to happen, happened.' I respect so much that these women were brave enough to come on camera and share their stories so that they may help others in feeling understood and heard. Thank you for sharing this.
I was 9 when I was sexually assaulted several times by the same man. I didn’t know I was getting fingered at all. And when I did get educated and realised about what happened, the man already moved to another country and joined the military. Even if I can report him, I won’t have any proof at all. Sometimes I would be just mad at myself for being dumb at that time and not knowing what he was doing to me. I never told this to anyone so it feels good now that I wrote it down into a paragraph.
Girl I know you are strong and I know you will overcome this trauma and if you want to talk you can ping me on Instagram ..... Saranghae 💜
it's not on u for what happened. ur not dumb
I am so sorry that happened to you and I am survivor of sexual assault but it is not your fault for this at all and it is rapist and sexual assaulter’s fault for that.
2:12 I didn't know that I was important enough to draw boundaries around what people could and couldn't do with my body.
Exactly what I thought when I was sexually abused.
I was 6 or 7 and I felt like I was the only person who experienced that. That's why I couldn't tell anyone and lost confidence in myself
ruclips.net/video/TQGScRRALrA/видео.html
This song is based on real life incidents.
This song is to help raise awareness for those who can relate or have been through similar situations.
raising awareness for Sexual abuse. Ptsd Survivors.
I didn't know I was assaulted for almost two years. I thought that's what sex was supposed to be like. I used to hate seeing his face and just felt so much resentment. I thought it was because he stopped talking to me afterwards, that I was bitter because I got played. I talked hypothetically to people about it and they said "if a girl puts herself in that situation she deserves what's coming". I wish I said something then because I can't stand to see his face anymore and I can't explain why.
Ladies, it is NEVER YOUR FAULT for being raped. It is the rapist's fault and ONLY the rapist's fault. I hope you all find the power to struggle through this. Thank you for the enlightening video.
thank you
A fitting poem I had written a while ago. Poetry always makes me feel less alone. So I hope it touches at least one person.
Pigtails
How do I word it?
Well That's a hard one
How does it make me feel?
Boys say it made me fun
I don't really know though
When did my nightgown turn to lingerie
Never speaking much of my adolescence
It's all just a series of dark sad days
I remember my long tangled pigtails
I remember your strong demanding hand
I remember my mother crying
I just can't recall the details of this man
Sometimes I fear that I'm lying to myself
Most of the time I fear that I'm not
Sometimes I think of how you said everyone does it
Then I remember feeling ill when we were caught
Everyone does it
The pastor and his love
Believing you were right gets harder everyday
I don't think that he liked to shove
They're all just moments however
And it's too late for justice
So I'll bite my fingernails
Reciting your teachings of what love and lust is
I hope you get what you deserve
I can't speak up, justice always fails
But oh how I cry when you look at those girls
All those girls with their long tangled Pigtails
👏🏾 👏🏾 👏🏾
This is a great poem . It's truly sad that people have to go through harassment and stay silent.
I've had experiences of sexual assault more than once.. After repressing for over a decade of abuse sustained by one person throughout my childhood, another instance happened with someone else as an adult and I didn't report it until 2 weeks later when I went to the doctor. My doctor told me I needed to report it, so I finally went to police about it. I met with an officer and talked to him for almost 2 hours. He then escorted me to the jail where I was supposed to talk with someone but the SGT told me I had to come back at a different time, so I did. They said I would be in a room, recorded, with two detectives and come to find out the room I was in was not recorded and I was being scrutinized for not reporting it sooner, putting myself in a one-on-one situation with someone, going back to that person after it happened (because I ended up finding out where he lived) and that I "seemed more distraught about the instances that happened to me growing up". I was told that "you have until you're 33 to report the childhood abuse" and that was it basically. I asked them what happens next and they said they would present it to another person to decide "if I have a case or not" and I never heard anything back from them and that was almost 5 years ago. I have respect for law enforcement, but women are so reluctant to report anything for all the reasons these women stated, and more.. But when you tell someone, regardless of age, race, gender, etc, that they basically have no grounds for reporting due to WHATEVER reason (in my case, since I was more upset about past history).. Where is the justice in that? I love every one, whether they share their story or not. Regardless if you share, report, or keep it in, YOU ARE STILL STRONG, YOU ARE STILL BRAVE, YOU ARE STILL BEAUTIFUL.
I never reported because i know thats just whats going to happen.
I want a male version. I got raped when i was young. I am a man and noone believed me
Oh for fucks sake people are still believing that men do not get raped... some people in this world are really dumb and ignorant.
Stay strong, I wish you good luck in your life!!!
John Wie That must be hard for you especially when men and boys are held responsible because they 'should have been able to defend themselves'. That's so messed up.
John Wie My heart goes out to you. Yes, men can and *do* get raped, and I agree that a male version of this is a good idea--or at least have two male survivors of sexual assault in the video!
mana_narie x thanks I apreciate your kind words
Bird Topaz thanks. You are a kind person I hope you'll have a happy life
I did report it and i regret it.... My own mother does not believe me
Liz Cruz,I'm SO sorry that happened to u. I know some people find it hard to get over the fact that someone just uncaringly abused their bodies without their permission. Remember it's always the perpetrator's fault because they lack self control. I hope u will be able to recover. My heart goes out to you
@@Galaxygoddessg
They not always lavk self control! Oftentimes they want to do it! If they would only lack the self control but they would never want to hurt someone they wouldn't rape.
If they had no empathy and a lack of self control they would still regret it the moment after. But often times it is just what they want! To hurt and destroy without considering the rights, feelings and boudaries of the other person.
Then your mother is a horrible person who isn't worthy of being your mother if she doesn't believe her own child.
My heart truly goes out to you and don't blame yourself for what happened, it's the rapist fault for a lack of self control.
A mother should love and support you right or wrong. Have you lied about anything big in the past?
this is also my worries, i hope i can tell this to them soon but i need a lot of courage : ) and yeah i'm so sorry that u experienced that.
I never understood why women would decide not to report. I think now I do. I think now I understand. Thank you for coming out, being so brave and opening up.
Yeah, we usually don't cause no one believes us, it doesn't go far enough in court, or the rapist gets off twice, first time when they did it, second time when they aren't charged with the crime.
I did not tell anyone what happened to me for 8 years
I told someone this year
I was 7, this person was my so called cousin did it. I went to the basement where they slept and I layed next to him and then my pants were down and he put his private part on my thigh and slapped it around and he said “did you feel it” it felt wrong so I ran off into my room. I didnt tell anyone.
I ended up telling my mom when I was 11 and all she said was “he’s stupid stay away”
I told my dad this year and all he said was “HES STUPID” then left it at that.
On June 16th there was this thing were south sudanese girls come out and tell their stories and I came out then my brother found out.
My brother and I weren’t on speaking terms because he beat me up months before. He texted me “I saw your tweet go tell dad” I said “I already did but he didn’t do anything”
Long story short we had a meeting today about it (I’m 14 now) and my dad came to this conclusion after I said I wanted to take legal action, I just had a meeting with my parents and my dad said that jail is horrible and people get killed for sexual assault and why would I want that. My dad believes in these spiritual things where (my sexual abusers dad is my uncle on my moms side) he has the power to curse us when he’s mad that his son got locked up and my dad said that that curse is gonna go to you and your siblings and your luck is going to be gone and so are your siblings luck (it passes down) and we’re able to die on the spot. They talked me out of not reporting it and plus my older brother said “what good is that going to do you?” So I can’t report it and I’m trying to train myself not feel like I need to report it.
Their plan is to talk with his parents , I told my parents I don’t want to see his face at all. Ever.
I just want to heal and become a more happier person, I’m probably considering therapy since my brother suggested that.
@@AlatOnDemand I’m so sorry this happened to you.
I was raped 2 years ago, by my son's father... I've only really just admitted to people and myself that it was real, everyone's so mad at me for not reporting it at the time... I had many reasons, firstly it truly means that it actually happened. Being in denial of the fact for a long time was how I coped. It meant that I could get through the day with minimal struggle. But like one of these women say, I just didn't see how reporting it and being forever marked as a liar would help my situation. I was in a relationship with him at the time (I left with my baby the next morning) it was blatantly clear to me that it wasn't worth the heartache. Plus the fact that even if I was believed, one day my little boy would grow up, and find out what his dad did to me.
.... I'm kind of ranting here... I guess what I'm trying to say is that everybody deals with trauma differently. Every situation is different. And I had already lost control of my body. There was no way in hell, that I was gunna loose control of how I moved forward. I really needed to see this video today. All of these people are so brave, for telling their stories. It's nice to feel that actually I am justified. And I have no reason to feel guilty. Thank you.
Sending you lots of strength and love ❤️
I am so sorry that happened to you and it is not your fault for this at all. It is rapist’s fault for this.
It was after reporting an assault that I really began to blame myself- despite being a youth who was taken, by an adult (friend of a "friend")to a location I could not leave. Police ask some overly logical-sounding questions ("Why didn't you _____?" [fill in the blank]) which do not take into account the way a person in that situation is actually thinking ("This is NOT happening"; "I can make this stop, it's okay, I'll get this under control"; "I'm tough, I'll get through this..").
Why couldn't you leave?
@@kirkclarke7396 I was a minor, with no money, late at night, in a not-great neighborhood just a little too far from home to walk. It was NOT where I'd been told we were going (Denny's); I'd gone with people I thought I knew. They lied to me several times- once I was already in the moving car, of course- about where we were going and what we were doing, then gave me the idea that other people would be there. (This was also a time way before everyone had cell phones; nobody I knew would have been up, by the time I realized what was going on, and almost nobody I knew could drive anyway.) ~ I WISH I'd been able to simply call a cab, as the adult me could easily do today. But even that was not an option for the teenaged me; walking home was not an option. Buses cost money, and those guys I was stuck with drove around wasting my time until the buses had stopped running anyway. Yes, I STILL know their names and yes, I did file a report. (What really made me mad, actually, was finding out later that the guy who assaulted me was a KNOWN molester and rapist of teens, and that a good friend's girlfriend knew but deliberately chose to say nothing.)..Two decades later, I had another friend who ran into that guy while they both were serving time in jail. And the man was there again for doing the same damn thing, twenty years later. yuck
@@erinthesystem9608 thanks for sharing, and I'm glad you filed a report. People like that should be locked up and have the key tossed away.
Lying to get people to do something they don't want to do is quite normal, I lied to get a friend on a rollerrcoaster once - the black hole. Disrespecting a person's safety though is sick. I reckon she must have been paid cash or given something illegal to do that, but whatever the reason it was extremely selfish. Hope you have better friends now. Sadly you only know your real friends when you get older.
@@kirkclarke7396 The girl who said nothing to me chose to do so on her own, because SHE was friends w/him and he hadn't done anything to HER. Later she said to me, "I didn't think he'd do that to YOU." Like supposedly I was cool enough to be "off limits" somehow, or I was the "wrong type." ~ He was what he was: a predator, a low-life and really kind of a coward, totally unwilling to own his behavior. But she was a normal person (and supposedly this serious lesbian feminist) who CHOSE to roll the dice with MY life. That really bothered me. ~ A year later, I would even meet someone else- another guy- who knew about this man THROUGH other teen girls he'd assaulted or raped. So it also bothered me that he's obviously been hurting and frightening underage girls for SO damn long, in and out of jail (apparently), and isn't in prison where he clearly needs to be. Each case would be separate and look dubious/shaky on its own- and that's a problem, because seeing ALL of his prey in a single courtroom might look a little different. It's a pattern of behavior which WILL continue. ~ Thank you for your understanding! I reported him- and not a later assault- because in this case, it could have happened to ANYONE and I had absolutely NO way of knowing what was coming. I thought I was doing something normal and safe that I did all the time. To me, that is what made this person truly a predator upon innocent people. I told police not for me, but for other girls; I wish that anything had come of it.
So true
No one deserves to be ignored or judged. You deserve to OWN YOUR VOICE
I didn't report. I don't know why, I just feel like I can't.
If you don't report it nothing will be done
That's totally fine as well. I didn't report and had my reasons. No one gets to tell us how we deal with this shit. Whichever way you decide to handle it, is completely fine.
You've got this.
I was 7, this person was my so called cousin did it. I went to the basement where they slept and I layed next to him and then my pants were down and he put his private part on my thigh and slapped it around and he said “did you feel it” it felt wrong so I ran off into my room. I didnt tell anyone.
I ended up telling my mom when I was 11 and all she said was “he’s stupid stay away”
I told my dad this year and all he said was “HES STUPID” then left it at that.
On June 16th there was this thing were south sudanese girls come out and tell their stories and I came out then my brother found out.
My brother and I weren’t on speaking terms because he beat me up months before. He texted me “I saw your tweet go tell dad” I said “I already did but he didn’t do anything”
Long story short we had a meeting today about it (I’m 14 now) and my dad came to this conclusion after I said I wanted to take legal action, I just had a meeting with my parents and my dad said that jail is horrible and people get killed for sexual assault and why would I want that. My dad believes in these spiritual things where (my sexual abusers dad is my uncle on my moms side) he has the power to curse us when he’s mad that his son got locked up and my dad said that that curse is gonna go to you and your siblings and your luck is going to be gone and so are your siblings luck (it passes down) and we’re able to die on the spot. They talked me out of not reporting it and plus my older brother said “what good is that going to do you?” So I can’t report it and I’m trying to train myself not feel like I need to report it.
Their plan is to talk with his parents , I told my parents I don’t want to see his face at all. Ever.
I just want to heal and become a more happier person, I’m probably considering therapy since my brother suggested that.
@@AlatOnDemand I'm sorry you're family didn't protect you. I would definitely recommend therapy. I was about your age when I was sexually assaulted for the first time and it still hurts me to this day (I'm 22) get help please.
Cat b
I will and it’s traumatic it even reoccurs in my dreams etc I hate it
i was 13 when I got sexually assaulted by one of my closest friends. I didn't tell anybody because I thought people would think I'm doing it for attention. it hurts a lot and I know how these women must feel.
I didn't report it when I got murdered cuz I thought people would think I was just looking for attention
@@dapper_slapper4093 Wth does this even mean
I felt so betrayed bc everyone said that he was “too nice of a guy to do that” and a girl that claimed to be his best friend said he never messed with her. I was blamed for not going to the police on my campus. I had mixed feelings bc I thought I had liked the guy and we were flirting before his party and he took advantage of me before touching my chest. It didn’t click in my head that I was assaulted bc it was in disbelief that this could happen to me. It’s seems like every time we have these seminars about assault people are quick to say that it’s wrong and that they would stand up for the victim but then when it happens….crickets or blaming especially if it’s someone they knew that was involved
I was 14. He was my older brothers (my brother is three years older) best friend (who was older than him) sense I was seven. He didn't start doing questionable things until i was 14. One night he came into my room while I was asleep, locked my door, held me down, and did what he did. After he was done he told me no one would believe me, and that no one would care. Later that year I tried talking to my older brother about how his best friend would make comments or touch me inappropriately, but like he said my brother didn't believe me. It took me two years to tell someone what really happened. It took me two and a half years to tell my mother and she replied "why didn't you tell me, I didn't raise you to be weak like that". I think about that every day. My brother is still friends with him, but thankfully he lives in another state. It's been too long to do anything and sometimes I think that they are right. I'm weak for not saying anything when I should have. I may never get closure, but its not worth letting them walk away. please. speak up before its too late and they get the chance to do it to someone else.
I've never been raped but I have been harrassed and I regret not telling my teachers. The reason I didn't is because they never believe you and don't care. Another reason is because I was scared to be made fun of. One of my friends told me I was overreacting and he was just flirting. When I told my mom she also told me he was flirting and that I shouldn't fight back because he didn't actually hit me. She also often tells me I'm asking for it and I'm gonna get raped because of what I wear. I really wish I could be as strong as these wonderful ladies who have had it so much worse than me
Prissy LaRue I used to go to a church that I didn't want to go to from the beginning, and they made us wear knee length skirts thinking it's the true modest way to dress and to prevent us from getting sexually assaulted. Turns out I got assaulted by a youth member there regardless of what I was wearing.
The fact that your mom said that to you is really sad. Your not asking to be harassed or anything based on what you were. She should have been there for you and she wasn't. Some people tend to not care and don't take things seriously when people are looking for someone they trust until it's too late = translation: some people won't believe you, tell you your overreacting, just play along, and etc until they actually find out you were right the whole time.
Hey hun, nobody deserves that. It’s not ok for people to treat you like that. If anything happens again and your Mom says the same thing, feel free to contact the police. Even though you might not think it’s a big deal, it is. I’m not pressuring you, I know it can be hard, but please don’t hesitate to seek help if you need it. I support you xx
My abuser continued to threaten and gaslight me even after his admission of sexual assault , he said that I have ruined his life by reporting him to authorities and that i also made a “ mistake” ( can’t believe he said that SAing me was a mistake and an accident) he continued to play the victim and threatened to release our private conversations we had prior to the incident! I think it’s one of reasons i was so horrified to report him but thankfully I did the right thing by protecting myself and future victims . I’m on my way to heal now from the trauma even tho I still have nightmares of the incident and of him trying to kill me , the aftermath is just so difficult to deal with and my heart goes out to all victims out there .
You’re a survivor
Powerful women to me. I'm a survivor too, I didn't tell anyone until well after the event. Sadly it happened more than once. By someone I was with. Then when I told the police after getting away..."we have no historic evidence & too little finances to further investigations"
Hey there. I'm the blonde girl in this video, in the white shirt, and I work for a sexual abuse support group called A Voice for the Innocent. I just want you to know that you aren't alone, and if you ever need support, you can visit avfti.org. I'm really, really sorry that happened to you, and you have people in your corner.
Why didn't you leave him the first time?
@@kirkclarke7396 it takes on average seven actual attempts to leave an abuser. I left mine seven years ago, then he took our boys. So now it's still abuse to go through because I will not give up until I've freed the kids. Not all of us have enough money to go to a courtroom, if I did my kids & myself would finally be safe.
They prevent you from leaving in so many ways, a large factor is financial abuse. That's still happening now to me via false accusations sent to benefit offices. Each time I prove them to be malicious attempts, but I still starve for months waiting
@@emmaaudsley1045 why did you have kids with him?
@@kirkclarke7396 None of this happened before I had kids with him
Hi, excellent video ty so much, I’m so sorry for all these women, I also am a survivor of child sexual abuse! I’m proud of these women for their bravery to share their stories, it’s a life long journey to cope with such drama!! Ty, Bob,
Hey Bob, first off, I'm sorry that happened to you as a child, I'm also a survivor. And you're absolutely right, it is a life long journey to cope, recover and heal. I suppose the real justice is when we show those who hurt us that we are made stronger and more resilient, despite their despicable actions.
Hope all is well for you nowadays 😊
@@audreydoyle5268 hi Audrey, ty so much for your concern and your understanding, after this happened I went to a karate school and still go, the next person who try’s to abuse me will put themselves in heaven!! Ty, Bob,
Let me begin by saying that the act of rape on anyone, female OR male, is inappropriate. Let me state further that the act of violating a person’s physical body AND of one’s psyche without permission, is rape AND emotional rape, respectively, the latter of which is infringed on much more frequently and almost always without justice to the victim. The former violation is always accompanied with the later so a doubly traumatic event. While the later doesn’t include physical scars, in many cases the victim is mentally scarred for the rest of their life unless they go through the grueling process of therapy, and even then, there isn’t a complete eradication of the memory itself, but will help in coping with it much better.
Don’t ever let anyone tell you that you are at fault for placing yourself in the position that enabled the crime to take place. Don’t let anyone ever tell you that you were in the wrong place at the wrong time. Don’t let anyone ever tell you that the way you were dressed was the reason for the crime taking place. These are all ways that uncaring insensitive individuals justify the crime perpetrated on you and is just plain wrong.
While these heinous violations are unacceptable, the unfortunate torturous responsibility of reporting the act becomes the burden of the victim…talk about throwing salt on the wound. Until government decides to do the right thing, these violations will continue despite the claims. The statute of limitations, to some degree left up to the individual states, requires timely reporting of these acts. While this is unfair to the victim, there are reasons for which they exist. The time frames set are fairly reasonable, in many cases for years, and in some states, there aren’t any.
Ironically, one of the greatest tenents of this country is the protection of the individual from false and unproveable accusation. In the current environment, this requires the already abused to be further victimized during the reporting phase of a traumatic even. The only way to bring about change in a way that protects the abused within the confines of our greatest laws is to follow the statutory reporting time frames. This also means that those who report these events need to have enough evidence to prove the event took place and is why it is so important to report the event within 24 hours while the evidence is still present and identifiable. The downside of reporting these events in excess of the statute of limitations is the very real possibility of being sued by the accused, especially if their reputations are damaged, and is why it is so important to report as soon as possible. The timely reporting is also vitally important as unreported incidents free the perpetrator to commit future crimes against other victims. To make matters worse, this opens up the very real possibility of previous victims being sued by future victims at the hands of the same perpetrator if the previous victim did not report the event. Timely reporting is really a win-win scenario in that it provides the immediate process of healing for the victim and deterrence for future would be victims.
There are ways to provide a victim with a protective environment with which to report the event. Parents must cultivate an environment that is comfortable enough for a violated child to feel free enough to discuss the event with them. The local authorities must be accommodating and sensitive to the feelings and emotions of the victim, which includes police and educational systems. In addition, company Human Resources departments must provide much more appropriate responses to victims reporting these events than they have been. Unfortunately, these environments have been the main point of failure for victims on a level that is miserable at best and we have to serve them better. While this appears to address only underage victims it, emphasizes the importance of early reporting so they don’t live for years with the emotional damage that have irreparably harmed countless victims. For adult victims, local authorities and Human Resource departments are again the main source of failure in most cases.
The National Sexual Assault Telephone Hotline 800.656.HOPE (4673) is a good initial “go-to” for reporting these events in addition to professional guidance. Again, time is of the essence and the hard rule of thumb is NOT TO WAIT! In addition to calling the hotline, file a police report and GET A COPY OF THE REPORT AND VERIFY YOUR STATEMENT. Challenge anything that is in error or misrepresented in the police report. In addition, document your perception of their attitude towards you if you are the victim during the reporting phase. If your state’s law allows it, record the event during the reporting phase so you have audio proof of the filing. We’d all like to believe that those who are in place to provide protections to us are impartial but sometimes that isn’t the case and you need to ensure you’re personal interests are protected from all sources of inappropriate behavior. If your state doesn’t allow audio recordings, demand a trusted family member and/or friend to accompany you during the process and have them physically document the event and their perceptions of the interviewer’s attitude. There are many attorneys who specialize in rape cases. It is recommend hiring one before this process begins to provide you with good additional professional guidance during the process.
The key is to act as quickly as possible while the event is fresh in your mind. While our intent of not dealing with it may seem protective and “feel” like it’s in our best emotional interest, it is a double-edged sword in that degradation of memory of events and evidence evaporates quickly, turning short term discomfort into a long term debilitating unhappy existence. Surround yourself with family and friends during this difficult time in your life and remember, it is not your fault.
Emotional rape? lease use a different word. Psychologically messing with people's head is a bad thing, but leave rape out of it. The less this word is used wrongly, the better for all who are actually raped.
@@rachelenglish3043 look up the definition of rape.
Well said
Thank you so much for this. I was assaulted a few days ago and reported it today. I called several rape hotlines and explained the situation to make sure I wasn’t making false claims and mainly because I didn’t think the police would believe me. They confirmed to me that it was assault. However, when talking to the detective, he tried to switch my words up and claimed that it was consensual when it wasn’t. He didn’t believe me. That made it more traumatizing and upsetting. I felt like it was my fault. The nurse had to convince me that it wasn’t my fault that this happened to me. It’s just hard. I still feel really guilty and like this could’ve somehow been prevented.
EDIT: Grammar error
@@Angiebee. I'm so sorry this happened to you. While this process is painful, and because you reported it immediately, you've already begun the process of healing. You're courage will also save who knows how many would be future victims from this individual. You are "wounded" so surround yourself with supportive people who will tend and fend for you. Take time to heal...
I was raped when I was 10 by 3 guys,My brothers friend,My uncle and my friend.I recently opened a childline case and im getting therapy.Im currently turning 13.But I wouldn't change a thing!This all made me who I am today❤
I admire your strength sweetheart, please, keep fighting 💖
Same but it was my older brother
@@sacredbananza Sending you lots of love you didn’t deserve that
@@jeicypaucar-morocho4938 ty 🥺
@@sacredbananza sibling or cousin ??
I want to tell everyone of them that they are so strong and I hope they are at a safe place now.
I totally get it the most terrifying moment of my life was looking into his eyes just those devilishly lustfilled eyes following your every move
I barely remember anything from my experience but I do remember those evil eyes
💔💔💔
@@thekittykatie me too.
Yep, cold, steely gray eyes.....still gives me shivers and nightmares.
He was completely demented
This video has helped me more than i can describe. thank you for putting this out there
I was sexually assaulted by a friend from church. The pastor him self came to offer me money to shut up a few weeks later am pregnant today am married and I have this beautiful little girl bit inside I cry every time I see this act reaccuring in my head
Some people are scared to tell what happened
Me and my younger sister were assaulted in our own house my sister was 3 I was 9 by our own older cousin he was 16 I am now 14 and my sister is now 8
She got lucky she doesn't remember it and I'm thankful that she doesn't :'(
did you tell anyone. if not, please do
Hugs. Sssooo sorry. Tells teacher you trust or a counselor. Tell them to let you just talk to them so they can document it. Ask them to make you a doctors appointment so it can be verified medically. Do this if you don’t think one your parents will believe you. Also if you don’t want to go into foster care or have a safe family to go to. So sad. Hurts my heart so bad.
I was molested when I was eleven. I didn't tell anyone because at the time I didn't have a good relationship with anyone in my family and the person that molested me happened to be my mom's best friend. Because I didn't hold him accountable I had to keep seeing him and it ended up happening again when I was thirteen. I'm now fourteen and I still haven't told anyone because I have no proof and I fear that no one will believe me. I'm living with the pain of what happened to me and I've never had to fight harder than now to not give up hope that one day the pain will just go away. Stories like these help me more than anyone can understand so thank you for sharing your stories.
Maybe there is enough evidence to convict him. Best ask a female police officer what kind of evidence would be needed in order to win such a case. Maybe a discription of his ***** would be enough, or just that you can describe what happend so well.
Also, maybe he has done the same to other girls. They might feel just like you. If they see that someone is fighting him it might encourage them to also fight.
Please, at least ask a specialist if there is the chance of winning a case.
I'm female to male and 13,yesterday my mom's friend kept rubbing my leg,and groped me,and flirted with me...My mom won't tell anyone because there's no proof...
Toby you're a child though, they take that very very seriously! If your mum doesn't want to report, report it yourself..hope you're doing okay
Alexander Slamilton so sorry! Tell a school counselor!!! 💔💔💔💔💔💔💔
I AM SO GLAD THAT THESE WOMEN ARE ABLE TO SHARE WHAT HAPPENED IN A HEALTHY WAY AND GOD BLESS THEIR SOULS AND MAY HE PUNISH THOSE WHO HAVE COMMITED THESE SINS
When I came forward, none of my abusers faced any consequences, and I lost my entire family over it. While I don’t like not being believed or having to face consequences to things I didn’t do, I don’t regret it. I regretted it for a long time, but now I don’t. I feel empowered, like I had the integrity and bravery to speak the truth; the fact that people didn’t listen and silenced me is on them. As for my family, that’s hard, but I don’t want anything to do with people who treat me that way. I’d met really nice people now who do care about me, and treat me with loving respect. I’m better off than had I not spoken up and stayed in that horrible family.
My story isn’t everyone’s story, but I felt like I should share it anyways. I definitely understand their feelings. It’s awful being told by these people who are supposed to keep you and society safe that you’re not telling the truth. I will say this though; if you muster up the courage to report, TAKE SOMEONE WITH YOU. You will have support, and more importantly, a witness if the person you’re reporting to talks down to you. I had that happen, and I wished someone could’ve been there for me.
This is exactly what's happening with me right now my mother is blaming me for everything and telling me not to tell anyone the man who sexually assaulted me and my sister when I was 12 is living with us 🙂
Not to discourage any survivor that wants to report, but I wish I never reported because the process of having to say "this happened to me" to unwilling listeners was more traumatic to me than the sexual abuse itself. Five years later, I still think about the lawyers that defended the abuser, the female detective that was sympathetic towards the abuser, the close friends that I thought I could trust not believe me.... I met my best friend in an Adult Sexual Assault Support group, and she and I often talk about reporting because she never reported but she wishes she did, and I reported and wished I never did because I was retraumatized.... The summary is there's unfortunately no right choice in reporting or not, it's up to you yourself on what you think is the best for you
How can allowing a rapist to rape someone else be the right choice? :S
2:12
Exactly what I thought I was in a school assembly and the schools biggest idiots were sitting behind me and this one kept trying to hug me and I kept shrugging it off because I didn’t want to face him and tell him to stop because I knew he wouldn’t listen so I sat like that for the first 10 minutes until a teacher caught him and made him stand next to her the whole time
I was too scared to report it. When I was bullied at junior school and reported that I was given detention for telling tales and mother told me it was my fault. So when I was attacked in the park, by a stranger, at age 12, I was too scared to tell, I figured I'd get detention for life.
I'm sorry that happened to you
I wasn't raped but i was touched in places a 15 year old girl didn't want to be touched! He wanted to take me somewhere private to "talk" luckily i fought him off and a guy knew i needed help stepped in. I was touched and i froze, i was scared. I stayed quiet. Who would believe me, he was in a higher class than me. Worst part is people who were my so called friends, watched and let it happen. All they said was "hes drunk let him do that! Look at the way you're dressed just let him." They thought it was okay because he was drunk and what i wore that day. Worst part is he said i asked for it and i wanted it. I cried for days and weeks! I would see him at school and he would smile at me. It was like i relived that night. It started with that smile. My ex bf didn't even care! When i texted him what had happened he was angry. The next day he didnt believe me. The first thing he asked, "what were you wearing at the party?" He brushed off what i had told him like if it was nothing. If i went with him who knows what could have happened to me! My current bf believes me and was so caring. He asks if its okay if can do that or even ask if its okay to put his arm around me. Idk if i consider myself a survivor but im happy i fought him off and got through all the pain. Men or women don't deserve to be touched in ways they don't want to be! Im sorry if have ever been through this and you are strong and brave.❤
That’s sexual assault and you deserve to get help.
In Canada, cops found a girl inconscient in the backseat of a cab while the driver was doing business on her. The driver got charged. At the trial the judge said : " there is nothing that tell us this girl didn't gave consent before passing out".
Wtf?! How does that justify it? Being unconscious is not consent.
Thank you for taking the time for making this video. Thank you
We need teach women and men that okay to speak out about their sexual assault and don.t be afraid to report to the police
It's very painful when you're in the situation that you can't do something to protect yourselves. But, sometimes we still need to go on in our lives, yes it's hard but We need to continue living. We won't let those tragic happenings in our lives be the hindrance to live our life to the fullest. We are here in this world because we have purpose that we need to do.
I hope this never happens to me or anyone else.
I survived childhood rape by my Stepfather. He did it many times over a 4 year period. It was horrible. I fell into depression. I told my mom, teachers, family, and I wasn't believed. He was a deacon in our church, and he told people I lied because he was my step-dad, and I was mad that my mom, and dad were divorced, and was telling lies about him. Back then laws about child rape were almost nonexistent. I feel for everyone who has gone through the hell of rape.
I remember when I used to think that I would never recover rape... And here I am today, had ptsd after it and because he was my "boyfriend", it took me two months to understand what happened
One year after, I dont know if I will be able to stay strong eternally, and to anyone getting through this, you are strong and beautiful, dont let someone rule over your life and think that it was your fault, because it never was 🖤
This is the most relatable video about sexual assault I have ever seen. God it made me cry.
🐑
No one has ever believed me. So I now remain silent. Silent prison.
My Husky Sasha with lela sorry 😭😭😭😭. Hugs to you
Do you have evidence
Is it because you froze ie did nothing to resist a guy who everyone likes?
I hope you heal. Understand it was not your fault and break out that prison and burn it down never to return again. I’m sorry you were surrounded by people who weren’t there but I hope you are now. I hope they’re there for you and support you and I hope that one day, if it hasn’t already past, that you will be more than okay. That you’ll be able to move on
@@boitshekomyataza8113 You think you are righteous... Women falsely accuse men of rape to receive sympathy. What evidence is there she is telling the truth? I encourage victims to talk to the police, if that makes you mad I don't care
I'm meeting with my counselor and a detective at 10am this morning. I'm making my report. It took almost 5 months for me to feel ready but honestly I don't think I'll ever feel ready. I'm terrified. I'm ashamed. I blame myself at times. Each moment I become stronger. The pain of going through it again by telling my story is near unbearable. I carry so much blame until I tell myself the story in my head as if I wasn't the main character. I get one short paragraph into the book and the anger boils over. I feel numb and my thoughts shut down. What made him do it? Hunger for power over a war he knew he would win. He brought a gun to the knife fight and I was caught in the crossfire. He is angry at women from a past of hurt or rejection and I felt the flames of the fire that he started in his own head. He not only lacked concern for my well-being but completely disregarded my physical and vocal statements opposing his sexual advances. The only thing I deserved that night was a big glass of water and a blanket. Instead, I was grabbed at in the hallway after I used the restroom and sexually abused by two much older men who I naively thought were just two goofballs from the bar. I was in denial. I tried to pretend like it was a dumb drunk night and thought I'd forget about it in a day or two. I didn't. My memory was flashing vividly of scenes I tried convincing myself weren't real. He helped himself to aggressively touching me in the hallway which I undoubtedly resisted. I got to the bed and layed down near the other man I expected to show me respect while I slept soundly. I never imagined the loss of humanity and humiliation I'd be haunted with. I woke up to my pants being pulled off. I was near unconscious. I had no strength or energy. I thought the other man would stop it. I opened my eyes and he was looking right at me when he began touching my whole body. One man was behind me, inside me, and thrusting quickly as tried to grab the sheets and pull myself away. I found the energy to say no, I don't want to, and stop. My tired and watery eyes begged the other man to help. He seemed almost as uncomfortable as I was at first but it didn't take long for him to start pleasuring himself while he eased into the disgusting crime. Two penises penetrated me. Four hands rubbed all over my body. The memory I have of that night is scattered but the scenes I relive are vivid. It is undeniable that a crime not only occurred but was perfectly executed by two men that someone calls their dad, uncle, neighbor, or close family friend. I'm well aware that I may not get justice by law, but I feel justice by telling the story of the crime I never thought could happen to me.
I was told that, I wanted it anyways. That, it’s not big of a deal. Why am I telling it to them, it’s not important. It’s not that traumatizing. I don’t respect myself that’s why it happened to me.
And that if I report it, it’s too late. It happened now, so what, just move on.
I thought to myself that if I reported it, I will lose everyone that I care for deeply and love deeply...
Because it was them who assaulted me.
I felt so worthless and undeserving of the love I crave all my life.
I felt the same as the girl that says “I didn’t think I was worthy enough to draw boundaries what people can and can’t do with my body.”
I became afraid because I know for a fact that people will belittle the trauma again and will tell me again that it’s not that big of a deal and that there is nothing that I can do anymore. All my life, I always thought that it was my fault.
I was not assaulted, but I received inappropriate comments and some actions that I never told anyone. One main reason is because some people involved are part of our family and ofc, I feel like it is my weakness now. I can't imagine the pain of these victims and the courage they earned to be able to talk about their experience.
It happened when I was 8, I didn’t say anything until I was 12, nothing happened until I was 14. When something did happen my mom said she didn’t believe me.
*hugs and kisses*❤
i was six, it’s been so many years that i don’t have any evidence so i can’t report it or do anything.
The part about not being believed hurts me too much :(
Today somebody made me so uncomfortable. This 64 year old dude said some creepy stuff to me (I’m 17) and he was being very invasive of my space, randomly hugging me when I do not know the guy nor did I in any way say it’s cool to hug me. I’m so distraught cause I’ve been through sexual abuse in the past and I thought I was better at saying “no” but I just froze and I feel awful. I feel really pathetic. It might’ve just been a hug today but it made me feel so weak and embarrassed. I can’t stop feeling gross. I feel safe putting all this information here. And I don’t really have anyone to tell so
Just say strong sorry to hear about that
I didn't report because he was my boyfriend who dragged me into the corn field. He said he was sorry but that I led him on earlier that day. He said he loved me. I believed him. I was 21 and it's been eight years since it happened.
Same happened to me, I was bullied in college had no friends ,nobody to talk to, I told my parents I don't want to go that college right after first year they didn't listen as a result I kept going to my abusive ex who molested me multiple times, he molested me when we had broken up, he molested me in an elevator, then once he forced my in his house
I did report. Then I was "advised" that his family was important and I was not. That it would be this son of a well-thought-of-family's word against mine. This was told to me by the police officer in charge of my case on the night after being raped. I dropped it. And I have always felt such anger, betrayal, and shame.
This is heartbreaking. I'm so ashamed Women have to go to through this by perverted men. No, It's not okay. As for the ladies keep silent I don't blame them. That's a hard thing to go through. Females shouldn't have to suffer over men who are perverts and have a problem. Don't stay in silence. You're not responsible for someone else's actions.
It was my partner at the time. He had already been extremely physically abusive by then but one night when he was drunk was when it happened. I said no and fought, threatened to call the cops and he responded by breaking my face. I had to walk around with a gnarly ass black eye and bloody eyeball for weeks and I just knew people were looking at me the same way people look at stray dogs. I did report it but they said it would be hard to prove the rape, the only proof I had was my black eye and pictures over the years of my bruises from the abuse. But they said even that would be hard to prove because he was my partner. So I didn't... Because that was when I knew I would lose. My best option was to do what I could to move forward. That's all we can do guys... Report it. Do what you need to to get by. But move forward. We aren't alone, that little bit of knowledge knowing I wasn't the only one who was not only hurt but also discouraged to speak up. They can't keep us all quiet though.
“I don’t want this to be a part of who I am”
I'm planning on telling my mom this week about what my dad and brother did to me, but I'm scared no one will believe and I have no proof so court won't believe anything. I just don't want to face them again.
No please tell your parents now! Your safely matters!
I was 12, I'm 14 now and I'm so confused on how to feel about what happened...
You don't have to feel anything that doesn't feel authentic to you. After it happens, you kind of go through a grieving process. Shock and being unable to understand your feelings about it is part of the process.
I hope you heal from your awful experience
💖
Thank god for a video like this to talk about the things no one wants to bring out of the shadows
the sad thing is i didnt even know my assault was assault until my friends told me
maybe trust yourself a little more If it didnt hurt you, why do you allow someone else to tell you it did? Your friends are manipulatve
I didn’t either. I didn’t realize the extent of how horrible it was until I saw the reaction of my friends and doctors. I mean but I guess I knew, I was just in denial about it because I didn’t want to admit that I had seriously been sexually assaulted. Just saying it to myself mad me sob and feel a lot of unpleasant feelings.
I was 7 and I was raped by my cousins - 2 siblings. An older girl cousin and an older boy cousin. I was absolutely mentally and emotionally devastated.... I was being violated for YEARS BEFORE AND I WAS GROOMED and set up for this disgusting pieces of shits. I WAS ABSOLUTELY SET UP FOR THE ABUSE, FOR THE DAILY SEXUAL AND PHYSICAL VIOLATIONS.... this is why I don't trust any of my relatives.... MY MOTHER , FATHER, grandmothers and grandfathers and aunts and uncles and cousins set me up for that.... Or what they said or did ... To me.... For me..... THIS is why I don't trust or believe in or care about anybody but myself.....
TAKE HIM TO THE CEMETERY...AND TAKE CARE OF BUSINESS...
Recently met with an accident & got assaulted by a doc in the name of Medical examination
He knew nicely what he was doing & continued with it
His wife called & threatened to ruin my life
& Here I am
Every single day angry,resentful of myself,hating my body,hating how I let this all happen 💔
Thank U for this
I really needed to listen to all this to know I am not alone
I really wanna spit on the face of his so called wife, the people who support the rapists are equally responsible. Shame on them.
Don't blame yourself, ok hun? You are strong, so strong. I am so proud of you!
I never reported. We were dating and I thought no one would believe me. Its been 6 months, I'm not okay.
@lonely wolf Me either sadly at school, at first the rumors were "she wants attention" now it's "She wanted it she just chickened out"
@lonely wolf That's why I am afraid to tell my family, but it's really tough
@lonely wolf That's the reason why I haven't told them, and I dont know if I will
@lonely wolf I told to 2 of my friends and none of them even questioned if I was lying.
I don't and neither do u need to keep it as a secret or be ashamed! Maybe no one believed u, but I do believe u. Stay strong and as positivite as possible. U are not alone, and again, remember: they didn't believed u but someone will.
😆
When I was nine my sister wanted me to have a sleepover with her. I thought she wanted to finally be nice to me after all the years she hurt me and called me names and never told me she even liked me or wanted me as a sister. I was wrong. While I was changing into my pyjamas and my sister told me we had to go to bed at that second. At first I wanted to sleep on the floor then she said she didn’t mind if I slept in her bed. I was only wearing my pyjama shirt since she told me I had to go to bed. She reach under me and pulled down everything I had left on except my shirt and started touching me. I didn’t say anything for the whole time, I was scared of her. Still am. It lasted til 9:30pm-11pm (about) until she finally went to sleep but she was still touching me while in her sleep. I reached over to get her arm out from me and I slept on the floor for a few hours until I felt so disgusting that I went to my room and said that I just woke up earlier than her. I didn’t tell anyone, I haven’t told anyone in my family or really much anyone at all. I feel like she would hit me, hurt me, insult me, lie about me, and say that I was lying. I tried telling someone when I thought she wasn’t around. She grabbed me away and said “That was in the past, don’t think about it anymore. The past doesn’t matter and so do you. That never happened. You’re making things up. Why would you lie? Are you insane?” I had many more reasons why I didn’t tell people other than she would hurt me mentally and or physically. I thought she would get in trouble and she was still my sister so I never told anyone. I thought no one would believe me. I thought it didn’t count since I’ve been told ‘you can’t get raped by girls,’. I thought she would cry, I don’t want her to cry. I thought I would ruin her life, I don’t want to ruin her life. I thought I could’ve made the whole thing up (which I didn’t, I still have proof of that night). And I thought I was delusional. I hated myself, couldn’t bring myself to talk about anything even slightly touching the subject of sex. I couldn’t sleep at night since the events replayed in my mind and I passed out on the bus. I missed my stops many times and my parents had to come pick me up. They thought I wasn’t getting the right nutrients but then my mom asked me if I was depressed. Even though I was, I couldn’t tell her. I felt guilty about it. I was always taught to smile, be perfect. I wasn’t that anymore. I countered other forms of SA before the age of nine but this was rape. It shattered me and my mental health. I couldn’t eat properly. Too much or too little. I couldn’t sleep right, too much or too little. And flashbacks would reoccurring-ly happen and I would hide myself in the bathroom. I know I have depression, not any other type of mental illness, haven’t been diagnosed so I won’t self diagnose. But I wish my eldest sister listened when I told her I needed her help. No one listened to me. And no one ever will.
What about men who have been sexualy assulted by women?
I think some people threaten or blackmail you into not reporting it. Also, there are some people that are of a higher ranking so the victim doesn't think that people will believe her.
This happened to me before I knew what it was because I WAS 8 and I was just scared and didn’t know what to do
I reported it. I's so hard. You have to be strong and gain that power back. Rape cases are a long process. Mines been nearly 18 monthes and finally getting to the hardest part. Facing the man. Through the investigation process I have been homeless , in and out of shelters and havn't seen home for over a year. People say move to another town. Why the hec should I.? As my case is drawing to hoping a closure I want to see justice, Not just for me but for other victims and like the ones I saw speaking on the vid and people commenting. So I say is it worthwhile reporting rape ? it's hard to say at the moment because I feel scared and lonely. Rape is where the Victim becomes the accused. The justice system has to change so it's easier to face the accuser , and I believe it is getting easier . I got an IVO first and I was in a totally different location where my accused was. I cried because of memories but I had support and it was informal rather than a huge court stand. Now I just got to face this hurdle. It scares me to think will he go free ? I am a survivior of rape and now a Voice for Women and Men (Yes it happens to men too) Love to all victims
So meaningful, I was scared of not to be believed too. I was scared of many things. Left it behind and did not reported it.
No offense to all victims of sexual abuse but why would you not report it? It's like someone punching me and I'm too scared to hit back. All I'm saying is put your fear to the side. YOU ARE STRONG,BEAUTIFUL,AND POWERFUL. Remember that.
Because most people don't want to go to the police, be traumatized by their investigation, forced to retell the story over and over with as much detail as possible, do it all again in court while his lawyer keeps talking about how you consented and enjoyed it, and statistically less than 1%, let me say that again LESS THAN 1%!!! Of these cases will result in any form of punishment.
It's füçkêd
Because "ALL COPS ARE BAD!" remember?
My experience was more insidious as opposed to straightforward, which leaves me with grief about the events, yet no proof. I still remember the lustful eyes and smirk on his face. It's like I was a thing and not a person.
It's very scary when someone truly doesn't care about how their actions impact you. You lose so much of yourself that you figure, "what's the point of resisting now?"
It's sad that we all feel such shame even though we did nothing wrong and nothing that happened was our fault.
The person who sexually assaulted me repeatedly was my former stepbrother and he was 4 years older than me and I was a kid when it when it started. I know he was double digits, but can’t really remember exactly what our ages were. I was worried if I told, it would break up our blended family. My father ended up divorcing his mother when I was about 13 because of their relationship breaking down. I finally told when I was 17, after a suicide attempt. It had to be reported to social services and the police because I was still a minor. I had my mother talk to both on the phone. The police asked my mother to ask me if I wanted to press charges and I said no. There was obviously no physical evidence left years later, so it would have been just my word against his. I didn’t want to go through a trial when he probably would have gotten off. I know I wasn’t his only victim, because social services already had a file open on him. Sometimes I wonder if I had said something when it was happening, would their have been other victims?
I don't understand. If someone Rapes you, or assaults you in any way REPORT IT! (I can understand the girl and the drugs, she could be charged with getting involved with illegal substances.) It doesn't matter if it is, "Your word against his". They have rape kits to sense trauma, female and professional Officers would will be there to listen to your story. Anything you need, fight until the very end! What frustrates me the most is when victim reports it months, or years later. The longer you wait, the less likely your story will sound believable. If anything if you DON'T report it you ARE at fault because, you're technically saying YOU ALLOWED it to happen. If you don't report it, that monster is still walking around and can do it to someone else! .... Feel really bad for the girl with the drugs though.
I’m scared to tell, I’m scared to report.
Wish I didn't report mine...... ended up being charred with soliciting. It killed me.. he was in the court room too i lost it... infront of alot fo people before a judge who read out the charge. I felt like it was happining all over again, he was laughing the whole time... all I heard was why did you do this there were ways out.. it was your fault you wanted it...
Im so sorry
I know something is wrong with this world or maybe me when two of these stories are almost spot on with two of my stories. These girls are strong and I understand 100% the fear of pressing charges and doubting yourself and being seen as a victim by everyone else
I was sexually assaulted as well, and it brings tears to my eyes that they feel like they are not important, but im here to say that everyone is important, no matter who you are❤ it hurts to see this still happening! Its fucken 2019, and i would think we have learned not to rape or sexually assault someone in any way wether it be a male or female!
i didn't report it because it's my father and i didn't want to break apart our family