Things you shouldn't say to someone with SOCIAL ANXIETY

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  • Опубликовано: 21 окт 2024

Комментарии • 76

  • @KatAmarie
    @KatAmarie  3 года назад +24

    If you'd like to help me keep the lights on and support my channel, you can donate over here:
    www.napiorkowska.net/donations

    • @1993-k7n
      @1993-k7n 3 года назад

      Пожалуйста, включите русские субтитры

  • @littlekitsune1
    @littlekitsune1 3 года назад +95

    Having fears is not a choice. Nobody _wants_ to be miserable. An anxiety disorder is literally your brain and senses turning against you illogically.

  • @esmesal6006
    @esmesal6006 3 года назад +175

    No one talks about how it’s hard to keep your friendships with friends while having social anxiety. Even if we are close

    • @Zoe-mm3no
      @Zoe-mm3no 3 года назад +19

      Exactly! I feel bad for my close friends because it’s so hard for me to hangout with them.

    • @philosphy_daily0
      @philosphy_daily0 3 года назад +10

      This is so true!! I find it so hard to keep my friendships too and even after 4 year with social anxiety nothing really changed.

    • @user-yr7mz4ot4t
      @user-yr7mz4ot4t 3 года назад +3

      I know right! I thougth i'm the one who struggles with that😅

    • @usmanmughal3898
      @usmanmughal3898 3 года назад

      Absolutely, True 😔

    • @namjoonussy1776
      @namjoonussy1776 3 года назад +2

      @@philosphy_daily0 lol my parents invalidate it and say that I need to be braver and that I'm lazy to talk to people even though they know I have it

  • @sleepybeanz72
    @sleepybeanz72 3 года назад +95

    My mom tells me "you need to step out of your comfort zone" and when I do it usually ends up with me crying in my bed at night thinking about how I could have said or done something different etc. ;-;

    • @user-bn1hb3iw8t
      @user-bn1hb3iw8t 3 года назад +11

      Same I always get so angry at myself over something I said or did when I tried to step out of my comfort zone that most likely wasn’t even that bad for other people

    • @user-yr7mz4ot4t
      @user-yr7mz4ot4t 3 года назад +3

      Yeah,so true

    • @всемпривет-г5щ
      @всемпривет-г5щ 3 года назад +2

      YES

  • @martynalipinska4104
    @martynalipinska4104 3 года назад +103

    As a person with social anxiety - thank you so much for this! Also it’s wild how many of them I heard throughout my life...

    • @sebb8789
      @sebb8789 3 года назад +3

      "WhY aRe YoU sO qUiEt?"
      I swear the next time someone asks me that question I'll just outright rip their vocal cords out of their throat with my bare hands.

  • @haziracool
    @haziracool 3 года назад +61

    One time when I sit at a table with a group of friends, we were talking about random stuff and out of know where one of my friend pointed out at me and asked 'Why are you so quiet?' and everyone were looking at me and waiting for my answer and at the time I feel so uncomfortable.. it took me a few seconds to answer that lead me to overthink. From that day, I've always feel more insecure to blend in with people. So yeah don't directly say it to someone even though that person look cheerful all the time, perhaps you could approach them nicely and ask politely (not in front of people) for sure :)

  • @cameronteel7200
    @cameronteel7200 3 года назад +28

    What type of response do people even expect when they ask “why are you so quiet?” Like how is anyone supposed to answer that question...? It’s so uncomfortable and just puts someone on the spot, essentially criticizing their behavior.

  • @FariaAlex7
    @FariaAlex7 3 года назад +56

    So good to see more and more people talking about social anxiety. I always felt like a lot of people don't even know that this problem exists. Thank you so much for this video, it's extremely important and helpful!

  • @hammerbaglockser3004
    @hammerbaglockser3004 3 года назад +31

    My girlfriend has social anxiety. And im so sad to know now that i told her at least 4 of this sentences. Thanks for it. I thought i was giving good advices but if was only sinking her. Ill try my best. ( From France)

  • @fireflythinking1290
    @fireflythinking1290 3 года назад +18

    I'm a shy introvert, I don't have social anxiety (although I hate phone calls and talking in groups etc)... People don't understand that social anxiety is like the step further from shyness, which is truly crippling. I imagine it's hard to understand for extroverts, etc... But few people really try to listen

  • @kittynefarious2293
    @kittynefarious2293 3 года назад +16

    Love when you try to explain and the person says "we all get shy sometimes, it'll be okay, you'll get over it Soon enough.". Makes me wanna crawl in a hole..the expectations feel vast.

  • @melisapam3078
    @melisapam3078 3 года назад +26

    I have social anxiety for years. I love your videos, I love what you do Kat, THANK YOU!

  • @spikeyconstantine
    @spikeyconstantine 3 года назад +5

    The feeling of seeing a crowd in a mall with everyone minding their own business even making me feel choke and out of breath. Yet, people keep on asking me to go out and have a social life.

  • @Darkblade0926
    @Darkblade0926 3 года назад +4

    I've been getting the "why are you so quiet?" question since I was a kid and I never knew how to answer

  • @marianajimenez9376
    @marianajimenez9376 3 года назад +1

    Kat, u always come back when i need to hear you the most. U have been a milestone in mental health journey. Thank u for everything

  • @arthurmorgan2906
    @arthurmorgan2906 3 года назад +9

    I used to have social anxiety 10 years ago. Glad I got rid of it. I moved from social anxiety to the level when I had years of experience of meeting people from all over the world. But in my basics im still introvert. It's quite paradox.

    • @sebb8789
      @sebb8789 3 года назад

      How did you manage to overcome it? It would be interesting to hear.

    • @arthurmorgan2906
      @arthurmorgan2906 3 года назад

      @@sebb8789 good people on high school helped the most then I started to travel despite many obstacles. But it was rather long term process

    • @kreri8129
      @kreri8129 3 года назад

      @@arthurmorgan2906 Travelling is such a good way to challenge your social anxiety. I wasn't brave enough back then to travel entirely solo (I'd recommend that for those who are though) but I moved overseas with a friend and she later moved to a different city so I was forced to go out and meet people on my own and was naturally put in situations where I had no one but myself to rely on. It was extremely challenging and I had many moments I felt like just hiding in a corner but I made a lot of progress during that time and pushed through. Even though it was difficult I look back at that time very fondly and I grew so much from it. I've learned you will always feel better for trying even if you have moments of failure. There is always something to learn from it so I wouldn't even call it a failure.

    • @arthurmorgan2906
      @arthurmorgan2906 3 года назад

      @@kreri8129 how old are you? Where are you from? If you want we can get in touch via email...

  • @philosphy_daily0
    @philosphy_daily0 3 года назад +6

    Thank you so much...its just amazing to see that other people feel the same as me, because no one really understands me sometimes or they think I am being dramatic about the whole thing. Finding your chanel really helped me in a way and it just makes me fell more...normal. Thank you again...

    • @sebb8789
      @sebb8789 3 года назад +3

      What helps me cope is looking around a room and just observing people and thinking: "You could be just like me but I wouldn't even know it". After all, people with social anxiety are very good at hiding their social anxiety. That's why it can be so overwhelming sometimes... the need to hide your true emotions can be very exhausting sometimes.

    • @philosphy_daily0
      @philosphy_daily0 3 года назад

      @@sebb8789 thank you for the advice, what I find to help me in social situations is just kinda turning my brain off while I am talking to someone bcs that way my social anxiety kinda leaves me for a moment but that doesent work always...

  • @freakinfrogs3861
    @freakinfrogs3861 3 года назад +8

    I honestly dont know if I gave social anxiety. I'm scared that if I go to a therapist and dont have anything wrong with me, I'll realize that I was just overreacting. If I'm overreacting, then this is how I'll be forever, if this is just my personality, I would hate myself. When people talk to me first I can usually talk to them fine or have a completely blank mind. But when I desperately want to start a conversation, its REALLY hard for me. Especially if they're in a group. I'll also usually find something I did wrong when i talk to them.

    • @fireflythinking1290
      @fireflythinking1290 3 года назад +4

      It doesn't matter whether you get a diagnosis or not, if you feel uncomfortable with an aspect of yourself/ your life, then you should consider therapy :)

    • @shivamkumarchoudhary12
      @shivamkumarchoudhary12 3 года назад

      You don`t have social anxiety

    • @gavinbannister4124
      @gavinbannister4124 3 года назад

      If you’re overreacting, and you haven’t been able to stop overreacting when it’s doing you harm, it’s not overreacting you’ve got a problem X hope that’s validating

  • @thinkerhmm3239
    @thinkerhmm3239 3 года назад +2

    For me the main problem of all the statements by others that are made in the video is that none is validating the emotions of the person who has social anxiety.
    i mean, to have any kind of anxiety means to be in some state of fear that tells our body to be on high alert. While we may appear shy to the outside our minds are racing.
    While I think that most people have good intentions, especially if they propose random solutions or words of 'understanding', their impact can be bad on us if they never cared to understand us on an emotional level.
    The best thing they can do (from my experience) is to validate our emotions without any judgment, really trying to grasp our reality perspective, to get a glimpse of all the input that we perceive that leads to the anxiety.

  • @fix900
    @fix900 3 года назад

    Kat this is a WOW work, this is more then art... You absolutely get the point every time. Still can't believe and i am very disappointed about people saying that you are faking your struggles. But i believe you totally. And you are helping me so much. Thank you. You did more then my therapistS.

  • @sunnyone8465
    @sunnyone8465 2 года назад +1

    i’ve been told these so many times that i started telling them to myself

  • @MrEpiclost
    @MrEpiclost 3 года назад

    one of the most comforting video ive ever seen :c ♡♡♡♡♡

  • @anamaria-db7pq
    @anamaria-db7pq 3 года назад +1

    I was very outgoing and relaxed in the past, my social anxiety developed over the last years after high school. I became like another person. I became super quiet and began to got told these sentences often which only made it worse. I wonder what happened to me that I became like this. It is obviously not my nature. My stomach begins to cramp, I stumble upon my words, become paralized the longer I didn’t say something in a conversation, I am nervous and people sometimes point that out which makes me sad. I then know that it is obvious that I am an anxious wreck and I feel so vulnerable. When inside I know that I am actually very strong. It is a very superficial kind of fear that seems overwhelming in that moment ...

  • @marvindinse1154
    @marvindinse1154 3 года назад

    Thank you so much for this video. I sometimes got the feeling to not understand how my close ones feel about what I say sometimes, so I am really thankful to see your very helpful and well made video. I hope you are doing well & healthy.

  • @jule4095
    @jule4095 3 года назад +2

    'we need to talk later.'
    first of all, i have anxiety. tell me now.

  • @beneciocayabyab7194
    @beneciocayabyab7194 3 года назад +4

    Another inspiring video! I love it

  • @PlsInsrtNm
    @PlsInsrtNm 3 года назад +1

    Thanks for this video. Thought I knew much about it and how to interact properly with someone dealing with it. Still much to learn.

  • @Somfic
    @Somfic 3 года назад +4

    Thank you Kat

  • @asrahoseinzadeh7963
    @asrahoseinzadeh7963 3 года назад

    I have social anxiety thank you sooooo much for making this video i needed to hear these

  • @MultiMario54
    @MultiMario54 3 года назад +2

    Some of people only see my social anxiety (problem) when I am popping too much xans :c but when I am on XXXX I am free but I cant do it for rest of my life : / Good luck for everyone who is struggling with this weird mental health condition . We all just want to be themselves...

  • @gavinbannister4124
    @gavinbannister4124 3 года назад +2

    Where do you find these ‘very supportive humans’ :(

  • @mope2145
    @mope2145 3 года назад +1

    thank you so, so much for this.

  • @nicola_bangtan57
    @nicola_bangtan57 3 года назад +1

    I’m sorry but why don’t you do Polish translations anymore? I’m Polish and I have no problem reading and watching it in English but recently I talked to my mom about my problems and now I’m going to therapy is just that these videos help my mom understand how I feel and I would really appreciate if there were Polish subtitles 💜 Your videos are amazing

    • @KatAmarie
      @KatAmarie  3 года назад +1

      I have no time to add subtitles.

    • @nicola_bangtan57
      @nicola_bangtan57 3 года назад

      @@KatAmarie It’s okay thanks for responding. Your videos are really amazing and I appreciate all the hard work that you put into it

  • @nishantverma1701
    @nishantverma1701 3 года назад

    This character of quietness hearts too much. Like why I am not speaking anything look very different from other..
    It creates low self esteem

  • @esinerdil3403
    @esinerdil3403 3 года назад

    You deserve much more

  • @feliperafael9698
    @feliperafael9698 3 года назад

    You're amazing.

  • @kasian4288
    @kasian4288 3 года назад +1

    Please can you add polish subtitles? 🙏 my girlfriend can't speak english but I really want that she see this video. In the past fiew days I'm having a bad time and she tell mi almost every sentence that you used in this video 😣 I think that maybe it will help her understand me better

  • @ilsebatten8028
    @ilsebatten8028 3 года назад

    People ask me why are you so quiet to me but like ummm I don’t have social anxiety and I am shy so ummm I’m just the quiet kid in the class and ummm I hate stepping out of my comfort zone
    And yet I’m just a weirdo that laughed at random thing or at random times like now I’m dying😂😂

  • @felicitasforall3330
    @felicitasforall3330 3 года назад +1

    Thank you!

  • @roksana4824
    @roksana4824 3 года назад +2

    i wish my mom could understand all of this 😢

    • @crlsg_4
      @crlsg_4 3 года назад

      Same here

  • @erikaoliva1150
    @erikaoliva1150 3 года назад +2

    So so damn true. Kat can I send u an e-mail? Already did it in the past but now there isn’t anymore, and I really would like to ask u a thing for a short film/video collaboration ... thanks

  • @esinerdil3403
    @esinerdil3403 3 года назад

    You are perfect

  • @izkaa1331
    @izkaa1331 3 года назад +1

    Kasiu, będą polskie napisy?

  • @marinex2232
    @marinex2232 3 года назад +1

    Szkoda, że nie ma polskich napisów...😥🙁😔

  • @delstr_
    @delstr_ 3 года назад

    I NEED SUBTITLE

  • @hidolfadler2309
    @hidolfadler2309 3 года назад +1

    Türkçe alt yazı lütfen :)

  • @gregdesign
    @gregdesign 3 года назад +1

    I like the fact that you include your self in this social behavioral problem, but did you really had it or fake in it? Just for being more legit? I was just wondering this for a sec

    • @KatAmarie
      @KatAmarie  3 года назад +10

      I have it. I’ve talked about it multiple times.

    • @tamannatazz5800
      @tamannatazz5800 3 года назад +3

      You became rude. Is it necessary to put your every thought in your comment box

    • @fix900
      @fix900 3 года назад +5

      I believe her. And a lot of people here believe in Kat. If you have doubt about it just go away, this is rude and disrespectful because actually she is helping a lot of people here and problably saving lives... Always supporting Kat and defending her.